V Magazine UVA Winter 2008

FAKE IDS (pg. 15)

HANDCUFFED (pg. 14)

OBAMA (pg. 13)

TWO STAR PLAYERS (pg. 6)

COLLEGIATE CHAOS (pg. 5)

CAUGHT

V

volume 4 issue 2 winter 2008

letter from the editors I have no clue what I am doing with myself next year. Hell, I don’t even know what the weather will be tomorrow. The only relationship I’ve been in this year is with UCS, and so far it hasn’t been a happy one: all take and no give. I am jobless, penniless, and, quite frankly, pissed. I realized, recently, that my last year of college—my last nights of 4 AM Little Johns, my last opportunities to mud slide in Mad Bowl, my last Wednesdays entirely spent playing guitar hero—is being wasted on an obsession with the uncertain future. I’ve been so caught up in wondering what’s coming ahead, that I’ve forgotten where I’ve been. When I looked past all the indecision and worry, I found there are a few things I do know, a few things I could never live without.

I know that on Tuesdays, there are $10 bottles of wine at Buddhist. I know that Pacino’s is far superior to Jimmy John’s, and I know that Officer Gary should have arrested me about three years ago. I know that I am not going to do my reading for English tomorrow. I know that I will not be the only one.

I know that I have been in the same office every Wednesday night at 7 PM for the last three and a half years. I know that the people we are leaving behind to continue the growth of V Magazine will succeed in ways we never dreamed. I know that the magazine will grow in size, in style, in readership, and in loyalty. I know that I will look back at these Wednesday nights, and maybe cry a little.

Laura and I have spent the past four years living by pica margins, by spell check, by text-boxes and by deadlines. I know it’s the key to a successful magazine, but it is not the key to our lives. I know it’s time to step out of the margins as we progress into the world and leave V Magazine here, where it belongs.

It’s been a short four years in college, and I’m glad we had the chance to make our mark. As it turns out, I don’t know what I’m doing next year, and I don’t care. All the roads I’ve taken so far have been right.

V Love, Katy Judge Executive Editor

Laura Scott Executive Editor

disclaimer: V Magazine, a publication at the University of Virginia, is published monthly, except during holidays and examination periods, and has a circulation of 1000. Although this publication has staff members who are University of Virginia students, V Magazine is independent of the corporation which is the University of Virginia. The University is not responsible for the organization’s contracts, acts, or omissions. The office of V Magazine is located in the basement of Newcomb Hall. The opinions expressed in V Magazine are not necessarily those of the students, faculty, or administration of the University of Virginia. V Magazine ©2004

cover photo by Jamie McCelland

V

magazine

volume 4 issue 2

feature

caught in collegiate chaos

6

by Natasha Nader

caught off guard

by Randee Ulsh

8 culture 12 fashion

student fashion caught in action

barack obama: cville’s latest “it” man

by Stephanie Garcia

i’ve been handcuffed (and it wasn’t sexual)

by Thomas Pine

faking it

by Jenny Miller

production manager

Ginny Driscoll

managing editor

Natasha Nader student life editor

Lisa Torrey

copy editor

by Christine Bogan

double play

Katy Judge Laura Scott

Laura Nix

caught in the act

student life

executive editors

culture editor

4

by Adele Farella

winter 2008

Samantha Hasey fashion editors

Danielle Blundell Derrick Taylor assistant fashion editor

Sophia Ahmad fashion staff

Karli Younger Clayton Maupin fashion writer

Huong Doan

layout artists

Laura Kost Sara Buchanan

business manager

Brittany Peterson

business assistant

Emily Clark Heather Klein fashion photographer

Jamie McCelland photographers

Dan Tarjan Vincent Zhu publicity coordinator

Randee Ulsh

staff correspondents

Christine Bogan Adele Farella Stephanie Garcia Thomas Pine Randee Ulsh webmaster

John Burr

secretary Jenny Miller

caught ACT in the

an inside look at cheating on Grounds

The clock is ticking. It is almost time to electronically submit your paper on Toolkit. You look at your half-finished essay and then you look at the essay that you found on an internet website. Do you decide to cheat? Or do you decide to abide by the honor code? Before you realize what you’ve done, you submit the essay from the website. Not long after, you are suddenly on trial for an honor violation. With horror, the reality becomes clear– you have been caught.

Unfortunately, this anecdote about cheating isn’t far from reality. The honor code is mentioned in every class at UVA. In fact, the University is almost infamous for its strict honor code. But what does the honor committee actually do? According to fourth-year Linda Liu, the Vice Chair for Investigations for the Honor Committee, “The honor committee handles cases of lying, cheating, and stealing. Our main function isn’t a punitive one because we are trying to promote the ideal of honor at UVA. However, it is to function as a judicial body, although we try not to be seen as a police force,” Linda said.

V Magazine: Why are most people on trial for honor code violations?

Linda: I would say the majority is on trial for cheating. Out of lying, cheating, and stealing, cheating is the most common reason for being on trial. Probably out of the cheating cases, the majority of those are about plagiarism.

V Magazine: Do you take into account that the students on trial may have cheated, but now regret their decision? Do you give second chances?

Linda: There are three criteria for an honor offense, which are act, intent, nontriviality. Act is if they did it. Intent is did the person know at the time or should they have known at the time that the act could have been considered an honor violation. An act is considered nontrivial if open toleration of the act would have violated a community of trust. All three criteria have to be met. So if they obviously did it, but they didn’t understand or know it was an honor violation, then intent wouldn’t be met. Then they wouldn’t have been found guilty. And if they intended to do it, but the act was considered trivial, then again they wouldn’t be found guilty.

been case processing. I’ve worked with students that have been involved in proceedings and I’ve been able to give them support. They’ve been able to come to me with questions regarding the step-by-step basis of what they need to do to contribute to the proceedings. If they had questions regarding family support, if they had questions regarding friends, if they had questions regarding honor itself, I was there to answer those questions for them. Honor advisors work with these people to make honor a little easier to understand. Honor can seem like this distant force because our school holds honor in such a high esteem. A lot of people don’t necessarily understand how honor works with them. Advisors are really there to answer questions, to make honor seem like a more personable process, and to make it easier to understand.

Being on trial can be obviously be a stressful and scary experience.

Therefore, aving an Honor Advisor can be helpful. V-Magazine interviewed fourth-year Honor Advisor Brooke Short to find out more about honor advising.

V-Magazine: Can you share any stories or personal experiences?

Brooke: We can’t discuss specific cases, but in my experience, in a broad sweeping sense, I can say that having worked with people has just cemented my support of honor. I believe that what we do here at our school really distinguishes us from other schools. Having being able to serve the honor system here and having seen the process work step-by-step has been pretty amazing. It’s been pretty incredible, but unfortunately, I can’t go into more depth.

V-Magazine: What is honor advising?

Brooke: Honor advising is a way to really support the person going through the honor proceedings. It’s an emotional and informational support. It allows the honor advisor to provide the step-by-step information needed to understand what honor is and what the honor advisor’s role in honor is throughout the proceedings. So it really helps the student or whoever’s involved to understand what their role is.

V-Magazine: What is conscientious retraction?

Brooke: Conscientious retraction is when students can kind of commit themselves to the honor system a little more. If a student has committed an honor violation or if they assume that they have committed an honor violation, they can take the first step and come to honor and admit this fault. That kind of reaffirms their place in the community of trust.

V-Magazine: What are the main reasons that people come in to speak with you?

Brooke: Well, the main reasons that people have come in to speak with me have

Don’t wait until you get caught to learn what honor is.

by Christine Bogan photo by Vincent Zhu

C AUGHT CHAOS in collegiate

a story about the difficult desicions college presents

I did not want to attend the University of Georgia after graduating from high school. I wanted to go to U.Va, but April 1st came and I was one of “those seniors” who got the thin envelope in the mail. I would not be a Wahoo for the 2006-2007 academic year even though it is what I had wanted my entire life.

After an unexpectedly mind-blowing year at the University of Georgia, May 1st rolled by and I received the “big envelope.” I now had the opportunity to come to Charlottesville. But, did I still really want to? After a year of constant “y’alls” and learning what the hell fried okra is, I had finally come to love SEC football, sweet tea, Widespread Panic, and of course, bourbon.

I made the decision, somewhat confidently, about coming to the University. It is where I always wanted to go, ranked one of the best academic institutions in the country and is extremely affordable. But, to this day, I sometimes look back and wish I were wearing a sundress in downtown Athens on game day or drinking Dixie Tea at General Beauregard’s on a Wednesday Night. (Yes, there is a bar called that, and yes, there is a life-sized statue of a confederate solider). I have liked U.Va in the few months I’ve been here, yet I still nostalgically think back to Georgia and how my life may have turned out differently. In one sense, I still feel caught between my past and present, and more importantly, what will happen in the future.

All of us as young men and women face getting caught and must make difficult decisions every day.

We fear getting caught drinking, catching an STD, caught breaking the Honor Code. Sometimes we face smaller decisions: Do I just say goodnight, or do I give him the “let’s go back to my place” smile?

We then must face larger decisions: Do we take the job on Wall Street or spend a year helping orphans in Africa?

As a transfer student, I still find it difficult to adjust to some parts of the academic and social life at U.Va. I chatted with some other transfers about their experiences at U.Va so far, and many feel the same way. Third year transfer from University of Michigan Meredith Welch says, “Even though I miss my friends and feel nostalgic for my old school, I know that coming to U.Va was the right decision. It’s one of the best schools in the country.”

Currently many of U.Va’s fourth years are struggling to secure jobs, get accepted into graduate school, and more generally, figuring their postcollegiate lives out. When I tried to interview fourth year Executive Editor Katy Judge, she replied, “I don’t even want to think about it right now.”

So, instead of worrying about getting caught or stuck in whatever scandalous or tricky rut you may find yourself in, get caught doing things you might not normally consider. Get caught at a new concert, get caught hanging with a new crowd, or even better, don’t get caught by anyone and spend some time by yourself. We all will continue to face social and academic pressures, but just remember that we are all caught in this deal together.

“

by Adele Farella

Get caught at a new concert, get caught hanging with a new crowd, or even better, don’t get caught by anyone and spend some time by yourself... just remember that we are all caught in this deal together. feature 5

DOUBLE PLAY

catching up with two of U.Va’s finest ball players

by Natasha Nader photo by Dan Tarjan

T

hough the diving catches of my glory days never matched those of second baseman David Adams and my ephemeral pitching career never produced any shutouts like right-handed pitcher Jacob Thompson, I did have the opportunity to chat with these southern gentlemen and get the inside scoop on what it’s like to play America’s favorite pastime at U.VA, both on and off the field.

The mere mention of the word baseball makes the faces of Adams and Thompson light up and their genuine love for the game is blatantly obvious. “J.T.” and “D.A.,” as their teammates call them, are both third year starters for the Cavaliers who have impressive stats and plans of “playing ball” after graduating.

They do feel that education is important even though they both are passionate about pursuing a career in baseball. “I’ll be honest,” Adams says, “I’m not too fond of school,” to which Thompson quickly adds, “Me either.” They say that it’s hard to balance schoolwork and baseball, especially at such a prestigious university like U.Va. During preseason, the team is at the field an average of two hours a day, five days a week, plus lifting three days a week, but both say they never get burnt out. “Eat, sleep, dream baseball,” Adams says.

And that truly seems to be the motto they have ardently lived by since the first day they each put on a glove.

The decision to play ball at U.Va was an easy one for these two baseball standouts. Despite the other

offers they had, they both felt U.Va was the place for them. Adams, who is from Margate, Florida, was even drafted in the 21st round of the 2005 MLB draft by the Detroit Tigers, but didn’t accept the offer: “Ultimately, my goal was to get drafted in the first round and that didn’t happen, so, no go there. I think it turned out for the best,” he says. A main thing that attracted both players to U.Va are the coaches who they claim are “some of the best in the nation” and have produced a lot of Major League prospects.

Speaking of Major League prospects, Adams finished last season with a fielding percentage of .973 and a batting average of .371, including five homeruns and 43 RBIs. Thompson, who at 6’6,” is a dominant force on the mound. With a record of 11-0 and an ERA of 1.5, he throws four pitches: a 91-94 mph fastball, an 86 mph slider, an 80 mph curveball, and a 78 mph change-up.

He has had “too many shutouts to count,” according to Adams. J.T. humbly specifies, “I think like four or five.” While their stats clearly speak for themselves, what is equally as impressive is that their humility matches their talent¬– an essential characteristic to being a well-rounded ball player.

For the 35 players on the team, there is not only a strong camaraderie on the field, but it also continues off the field, which J.T. and D.A say is their favorite thing about playing for U.Va. “I think we’re like family, so [my favorite thing] has to be that

tightness we have, just hanging out on and off the field,” Adams says.

“We just get to know each other like brothers.” “Well said,” adds Thompson, who is, self-proclaimed, “terrible at interviews.” “I usually get picked on about that,” he says.

“J.T.’s like the shy guy, the down home country boy (he’s from Danville, VA), everyone gets along with him, no worries,” Adams says. “Me, I got nothing. I’m just ‘D.A.’” A typical weekend includes having a cookout at the baseball house, relaxing, and watching a game on television on Friday night. Saturday is also a day for relaxation: watching football all day, and possibly even setting up some TVs and chairs on the lawn, and then going out later that night. The team mostly hangs out at the house, but they also frequent the corner, which Adams calls “the place to be.” Sunday is the day for recuperating and doing homework.

Although they have many different jerseys– blue, orange, pinstripes, etc.– in terms of their personal style, Adams says, “I’m I guess like the preppy jock, I don’t know. I wear the sport stuff or then I’ll just wear the nice Polo– all depends what day it is.” While Thompson struggles to define his style, Adams chimes in, “Dude, you shop at one store.”

“Yeah,” says Thompson, “I shop at Pacific Sunwear most of the time, whatever that style is.”

Neither defines themselves as a “pretty boy,” which is what Adams calls the players of Georgia Tech, their biggest rival. “They’re kinda

big pretty boys and they think they run the show,” Adams explains. It was just by chance that Adams hit a walk-off homerun to left field in the second game of the series against them when they were down two runs in the bottom of the ninth with two outs and runners on first and second – a moment that proved to be the favorite memory for both players during their entire career at U.Va. They are hoping for more memories like this to manifest during the upcoming season as they attempt to achieve their ultimate goal: getting to Omaha, the home of the College World Series. Last season, finishing with a record of 46-15, the team advanced to the championship game of the NCAA Charlottesville Regional against Oregon State. After beating them in the first game, they were up two runs and were only four outs away from advancing to the Super Regional until they just “fell apart.”

They ended up losing that game and lost the next game at home, and Oregon went on to become the World Series champs.

Virginia opens its 2008 season on February 22nd at home with a fourgame series against Lehigh. Needless to say, after chatting with D.A. and J.T., my love for the sport was revitalized and you will surely find me there, hopefully sitting in the VIP seats I was promised, and possibly wearing my old-school glove– just in case I have an opportunity to make a diving catch.

G

“

CA GHT

“

Last year, I was riding my bike from Gilmer to Cabell Hall. I noticed that the bar was up on one of the gates because one of the UTS buses had just passed underneath. I sped up to cut through quickly, only to find myself

as the bar was coming down. I got hit over the head with the bar, fell off my bike, and was the laughing stock of everyone on the sidewalk.”

GETTING

CAUGHT

Jordan, third year

off

GUARD Oh, the joys of being caught off-guard during your most embarrassing moments! Word of advice? Follow Shaggy’s lead… when you’re caught red-handed, claim “it wasn’t me!”

by Randee Ulsh photo by Dan Tarjan

“ “ “

“

One time I was selling refreshments in the football stadium for a fundraiser. I was holding one of those big plastic tray things with soda. I was at the very top of one of the sections, lost my balance and tumbled – – from the top of the section to the bottom. I landed and these old guys jumped out of their seats like, ‘Oh my god! That was unreal,’ and helped me up. I hobbled away and had bruises and scabs for weeks.” Micaela, third year

LITERALLY TUMBLED

My first year at the University, I was sitting on a couch at a fraternity party and a boy I did not know sat down next to me. I continued talking to one of my friends and after a few minutes, I feel someone massaging my back.

“ “

AS IF IT WASNíT AWKWARD ENOUGH I turn around to discover that the boy that sat down is not rubbing my back, but pleasuring himself !”

Amanda, third year

FELL ABOUT TEN FEET

One time in 10th grade, we were hanging out in my friend’s basement. One of the guys’ had just started sleeping with his girlfriend – he was the first one of all of our friends to lose his virginity. He showed up with a CVS bag and pulled out a box of 36 condoms or something like that. I had never seen them before, so I opened up the box and they

As I’m reading the labels and such, my friend’s mom comes downstairs to do laundry and sees me with all of the condoms on my lap.” Al, third year

MY LAP.

Last year, one of my legs fell into a water meter covering in front of all of these people on the Corner – I guess someone forgot to close off the hole after doing routine maintenance. Because I was I immediately fell to the pavement, getting dirt all over myself. I didn’t have time to go home and change, so I had to walk to class looking like a complete disaster.”

Anonymous

Last year, while pledging for my fraternity, we were at a Habitat for Humanity event with one of the sororities. The brother I was with told me to try and look really cool and talk to three of the girls, who were all extremely goodlooking. The girls and I were walking right next to a dirt cliff, and the brother was working right below it. Right as I went to say something to the girls, the cliff collapsed, and I and rolled into the brother working below, as well as the guy who was leading the entire event.

My friend ripped his pants on a nail after I collapsed on top of him, and we made complete fools of ourselves in front of all the girls.” Larry, third year

OFF-BALANCE,

FELL ALL OVER

“

This year, I hooked up with a kid in one of my classes. It was really uncomfortable the next day in class, especially when I realized that I had

LEFT MY FAVORITE PANTIES ON HIS BEDROOM FLOOR. To top it off, he mentioned to me that he had something of mine, and that it was pink. So the only logical thing I thought to do was hook up with him again. But rest assured – I now have my favorite panties back!” Jennifer, second year

I went out drinking the night before an important presentation in one of my engineering classes.

The next day, in the middle of my presentation, I

FELT SICK

to my stomach and immediately ran out of the room. Supposedly, after I ran out, the professor asked, ‘What’s wrong with him?’ and one of the girls responded, ‘I think he had too much root beer at the engineering broomball game.’ The professor was not pleased, as was reflected in my grade.” David, first year

student life 7

Don’t get caught trying too hard or not trying hard enough when it comes to the way you’re dressed! Whether you’re reading in the McGregor room, searching for a book in the stacks, waiting at the bus stop, dancing at Three, or eating late night at Christian’s, your appearance says a lot about you, regardless of the location.

Looking overdone is overrated, but first impressions are not. You never know who you’ll make eye contact with or accidentally bump into. Be ready for the unpredictable encounter by standing out in what you wear.

Add bursts of bright colors to your winter neutrals—purple tights with a black dress or turquoise striped scarf worn over a button down.

And always look for detail in unexpected places—delicate embroidery on tunics and tops, or bows on dresses and cardigans.

Just remember, you don’t have to wear high-end labels from head-to-toe or overaccessorize. Pair expensive pieces with affordable ones--no one will ever know.

More importantly, make sure you’re comfortable and confident with your outfit and maybe a bit inviting. Hey, the more glances, the better. So the next time you’re getting dressed, don’t throw on something sloppy, but put on clothes that you want to be seen.

Be prepared to get

student fashion

CAUGHT.

CA in ac

AUGHT ction

fashion 9

pher: fashion photogra nd Jamie McCella fashion editors: lor l & Derrick Tay Danielle Blundel n editor: assistant fashio Sophia Ahmad fashion staff: n Clayton Maupi Karli Younger & fashion writer: Huong Doan

caugh

t!

on Alex 1) Gentle Faun Clothing jumper dress, $72.00 (Industry); stirrup shimmer tights, $14.00 (American Apparel); black pumps, $24.99 (Target) 2) B.B. Dakota dress, $62.00 (Bittersweet); boots, model’s own on Ramy 1) Howe t-shirt, $50.00 (Industry); jeans, model’s own; blazer, model’s own on April 1) purple cardigan, $70.00 (Finch); vintage bustier, $36.00 (Bittersweet); black tulip skirt, $48.00 (Bittersweet) 2) Ingwa melero dress, $395.00 (Industry); Marc by Marc Jacobs pumps, $275.00 (SouthMoonUnder.com); necklace, model’s own

caught!

on Lance 1) Ben Sherman check button down, $59.00 (Industry); vintage cashmere vest, $19.00, (Finch); jeans, model’s own 2) Paul Frank sweater, $82.00 (Industry); jeans model’s own

fashion 11

BARACK OBAMA:

CVILLEíS LATEST “IT”

A

s the crowd roared, you would have thought the Flaming Lips were onstage rather than a politician. But when that politician is Barack Obama, the atmosphere makes a little more sense. A favorite among the media and hip young liberals, Obama’s appearance at the Charlottesville Pavilion on October 29th was an affirmation of the growing influence of Virginia on the national scene, as its reddish hint is looking more blue these days. With last year’s Democratic victory in the Senate races, Virginia is becoming more appealing to Democratic candidates eager to win over the state.

U.Va. preps, athletes, hipsters, business professionals, families, precociously active teens and punk pubescents — all of varying race, age, class, status — gravitated to the same candidate as they packed into the Pavilion.

When he spoke, Obama’s voice immediately captured the attention of the crowd.

With a booming, friendly, strong and sexy voice,

photo by Vincent Zhu

MAN

by Stephanie Garcia

he had the unique ability to speak as if he were talking directly to you, relaxed and calm, crescendo-ing to an almost deity-like presence roaring over the crowd. “He’s a preacher,” a supporter remarked as Obama asserted his views on issues such as health care, energy, AIDs, genocide in Darfur, education, the living wage — Obama knew how to cover all his bases to plead every faction in attendance.

“Obama is the underdog,” Governor Tim Kaine said in his introduction, both conjuring up images of the Spoon song of the same title and assuring supporters that only meant Obama would “work harder, smarter, hungrier.” This was apparent in Obama’s verbal passion. “I don’t believe that the American dream is a thing of the past, but the thing of the future,” Obama said.

Unfortunately, I felt the only downer throughout the rally was the brief stint of Bush-bashing Obama brought up. “People are coming out in huge numbers because they are sick and tired of George W. Bush,” Obama said. While this extracted cheers from the audience, I interpreted it as almost pulling Obama down to the level of the stereotypical politician eliciting votes by bringing down the opposing party.

However, Obama was able to instill hope and faith in his Charlottesville supporters. Encouraging the audience to become involved and believe in his Campaign For Change, Obama was both intimate and charismatic, revealing his most appealing quality as a presidential candidate: his character. An honest and self-proclaimed “imperfect man”, Obama promised to include all American citizens when making any decisions as president.

“The format and style of Obama’s presentation was a reflection of his political stance and strengths because it focused on getting people excited and exhibiting a positive and hopeful attitude as opposed to stating facts and strategies,” University Democrats Research Coordinator Megan Durkee said. “The informal atmosphere appealed to a younger crowd as opposed to Hilary’s, which was formal and catered to an older, more wealthy audience.”

After a flurry of activity and cheers of “Fired up!” suddenly Obama was gone. An electric spark hung in the air and I found myself humming, a la Barely Political’s Obama Girl video that circulated via the Internet all summer: I JUST CANíT WAIT TILL 2008...BABY, YOUíRE THE BEST CANDIDATE...

photo by Dan Tarjan

culture 13

IíVE BEEN HANDCUFFED

(and it wasnít sexual)

T

“

The words, “Turn around and put your hands behind your back,” have a cool breeze to them.

”

here is an odd feeling of calm that comes over you the moment you realize that you’re going to be arrested. Up until that moment, it’s a combination of fear and adrenaline as you try to apologize your way out of handcuffs. You say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to cause any trouble; I’ll go home now,” but the words fall on deaf ears. In my experience, police officers only hear your responses to their questions, and nothing else; unprovoked statements are white noise. Suddenly, you see the officer make a decision, and you know that the struggle is over. You’ve failed to stay free, but there is relief in finally reaching some conclusion, an endpoint. The words, “Turn around and put your hands behind your back,” have a cool breeze to them.

Technically, I’ve been arrested three times. While these arrests stem from only two unique incidents, and the charge of the second arrest were dropped, I like to include all three to bolster my numbers and sound tougher when trying to pick up girls. Surprisingly, I was a pretty good student in high school. I didn’t get into trouble with the school and had one reckless driving ticket to my name when I entered the University. I wish, however, that I’d known the following two pieces of information to avoid my arrests: 1. First-Years: do not smoke pot in dorms. Don’t think your R.A., a University peer within three years of your age, would call the cops on you? Aside from being contractually bound by their R.A. agreement to do such a thing, some R.A.s relish the idea. Or at least that’s the vibe that I sensed from the R.A. that called the cops on my friends as we were celebrating a friend’s birthday in dorms before bars first year. She was under some delusion that she’d done her part to fight crime in Charlottesville-I

wanted to strangle her as she flirted with one of the cops.

2. More advice to those under twenty-one: while your terrible fake I.D. may work on whatever gregarious drunk is slouching in the bouncer’s chair at Coupe’s, it will not fly anywhere else. After spending five hours in a holding cell in D.C. city jail following an attempt to enter a Georgetown bar, I cannot stress this enough. I was in a room by myself with only a metal picnic table and a toilet. I resorted to entertaining myself by punching the walls until I split open every knuckle on both hands.

Did I learn anything from these experiences? I definitely think that the alcohol and drug laws in this country are in need of reform. After my first arrest, I was required to attend a drug education course taught by a local offender rehabilitation organization. All of my classmates had been sentenced to the class for roughly the same offense I committed. The entire class was filled with individuals who had been using marijuana in the privacy of their own homes or in a similar responsible.

We hadn’t been driving cars or taking care of small children or partaking in any other irresponsible activities, yet all of us had to pay hundreds of dollars in program and court fees and attend classes with little educational value. One guy in my class had been caught growing a handful of plants and was sentenced to three months in county jail! If anything, I became far more disillusioned about the “War on Drugs.” Punishing average citizens for using marijuana in their own homes in a responsible matter doesn’t make sense to me.

Regardless of my opinions, be smart; you don’t want to get

by Thomas Pine photo by Vincent Zhu

caught.

“

”

THIS IS AUTHENTIC

I

n the United States an 18 year-old can vote and serve in the military, but can’t have a drink with friends until the age of 21. Yes, sometimes the legal drinking age seems foolish, but is the law more foolish than the things underage Americans (and their ofage accomplices) do to skirt the law?

At a university with ample of-age suppliers, the law rarely holds underage students back from drinking. There are pregames in apartments, water bottles filled with vodka, first year girls walking like baby giraffes, and red plastic cups everywhere. But drinking in seclusion gets old, and the lure of bars inevitably seduces the underage student. Bars, however, present a challenge: the bouncer.

While the presence of the bouncer is enough to deter many, others consider him an obstacle that can be avoided.

Fake IDs. Here are some options: go to a store in New York City that sells bizarre clothing, clothing that is too bizarre even for Halloween, and ask the nervous man at the desk in the back of the store about IDs. Be prepared to be taken downstairs, hidden behind coat racks, yelled at, and to pay $60 to $100. Another option: one of your friends is bound to know a sketchy kid from high school who makes IDs. You’ll have to take a picture

of yourself in front of a white wall, and send the picture, the information that you want to appear on the ID, and $140 to somebody that you don’t know and probably wouldn’t trust even if you did. Then there are the few underagers who know someone who is over 21 and willing to give them their ID. The person in the picture on the ID might have the same color hair as you.

Despite the complications associated with obtaining a fake ID, they are everywhere at U.Va. Some have a sticker on the back that reads, “THIS IS AUTHENTIC.” Some make IDs from hotel keys. Some actually look like the person on their ID. Even when they fail, there are a few persistent underage party seekers who don’t give up.

Geoff Lewis, formerly a bouncer at O’Neil’s and now a bouncer at Three, has been assaulted, threatened, and bribed on the job. After Geoff rejected a fake Delaware ID, the girl argued with him and threatened that she was going to have her senator write him a letter. Another girl, after he rejected her because she looked nothing like the person on the ID, told Geoff that she had a nosejob. When the nose-job story didn’t convince Geoff, she threatened to accuse him of assault, called him ugly, and then proceeded

to make nasty comments abut his mother.

A white male accused Geoff of discrimination after Geoff rejected his ID. A U.Va football player, who didn’t have any form of ID, got mad that he couldn’t go inside the bar and kept screaming, “I play football for this bitch.” And a girl, who presented Geoff with her information laminated on a hotel key, started to cry after he rejected her ID and told him that he made her feel like the ugliest girl in the bar. Girls have also offered Geoff oral sex to get into the bar.

Underage students seem unmoved by the legal consequences of possessing a fake ID. According to Virginia State Law, if a person possesses, uses or distributes a fake ID, they can be charged with a Class 1 misdemeanor.

If convicted, the person faces confinement in jail for up to twelve months and/or a fine of up to $2,500 and/or the loss of their driver’s license for thirty days to one year (http:// www.abc.state.va.us/facts/fakeid.html). On any given Saturday night, however, more underage students are in bars with their fake IDs than spending time in jail or trying to earn money to pay off the $2,500 fine.

FAKING IT

by Jenny Miller photo courtesy of ClipArt.com

fast& fresh!

photo by dan tarjan

validates parking in the corner parking lot!

students: receive a discount on saturdays and sundays with uva id