WITH SMOKERS WHO KNOW . IT'S
amels for Mildness!
Yes, Camels are SO MILD that in a coast-to-coast test of hundreds o[ rnf'n and 11ornPn "lio smokPd Came lsand only Camels - for :lO consN·ut iVP days, noted throat specialists, making weekly examinations, reported NOT ONE SINGLE CASE OF THROAT lRRITATION due to smoking CAMELS!
OLD TROLLEY SHELTER
EDITORIAL STAFF
CHEST E R A. BECK
Ed itor -in -Ch ief
BETTY B CATHER
W estharnpt on College Editor
DICK RAKES
Law S choo l Editor
DICK FITZ
Assistant Ri chmond College Editor
How ARD GOLDMAN
Bttsiness M anager
AL PITTMAN
MILLY WRIGHT
LEA THOMPSON
Copy Editors
MARYGL YN COOPER
Exchange Edit or
CONTRIBUTING EDITORS
JEAN BISHOP, GEORGE TAYLOR, PHYLLIS BARNES, WALTER PRESTON, SAM PATTERSON, CHARLES S. TAYLOR, THOMAS G. HARPER, BARB FERRE, ART DRENIOUS.
APRIL, 1950
University of Richmond MESSENGER
Ready to take off via American Airlines are Shirley Hall and Gil Armbrecht, University of Richmond students.
American Airlines maintains a consistently high level of service, desiring to serve college students for spring and summer travel a,t home and abroad.
BLUESTOCKING
JUST as the days of April are changeable, so the audiences along Broadway have become fickle toward the shows now on the boards. Most of the attractions have felt a sharp slump at the box office-even some of the hits. The Lunt and Fontanne starrer, I Know My Love, has announced its closing date as has the Berlin opus Miss Liberty. And most of the new shows, even those that receive fair-to-middling notices, are finding it hard going. But of course, South Pacific is still making "enchanted evenings" of eight weekly performances to packed houses.
Of the new arrivals to the Rialto certainly GianCarlo Menotti's new musical drama, The Consul, is the most il]teresting. This new work by Menotti might be called an opera but by concentrating on the story he has to tell, the author has made the play the thing. The plot is simply the plight of a young couple trying to escape one of the countries behind the iron curtain. The husband succeeds in crossing the border but the wife unsuccessfully tries to get a visa from a consulate and finally commits suicide afiter the death of her mother-in-law and son. The music that accompanies ,the plot has been called "a bit chromatic and fussy," but it adds a great deal to the tragedy of the story. The cast sings and acts excellently with Marie Powers being especially good as the mother-in-law. It was the same Miss Powers who was such a success in Menotti's earlier musical drama, The Medium.
April is also the month of the critics' award for the best play of the season and for the presentment of the Pulitzer Prize. The most prominent contenders for the critics' award are The Member of the Wedding, The Cocktail Party, and the newly opened The Wisteria Trees, starring Helen Hayes. But the awarding of the Pulitzer Prize is another question. In order to be a winner it must be an original play dealing with some phase of American life. The Member of the Wedding is an adaptation from the book of the same name and The Cocktail Party is, of course, by the English poet T. S. Eliot. This leaves only The Wisteria Trees but there is some question as to its eligibility. It is being hailed as a new American play by Joshua Logan but it is actually the Americanization of Chekhov's The Cherry Orchard. This could mean that there will be no award this year by the Pulitzer committee.
4
Speaking of musicals and next season, Irving Berlin has announced that he is working on a new m_usical in collaboration with Lindsay and Crouse of Life l.Vith Father fame. The new show which is about a lady ambassador is being tailormade for Ethel Merman, Broadway's favorite musical comedy star. Let's hope that Mr. Berlin will have better luck with Lindsay and Crouse as collaborators than he did with Robert Sherwood when they wrote Miss Liberty.
There are two new arrivals in the field of fiction that are of special interest. One is a distinguished novel by John Hersey and the other a distinct disappointment by Calder Willingham whose first novel, End As a Man, gave promise of a literar y talent that was well worth watching. Hersey' s novel The l/7all is being hailed by his publisher s as one of the great books of our generation an d most of the critics are agreeing on the book 's merits, wi1th one of the reviewers calling it a modern masterpiece. The sto_ry which describes th e tragic fate of Jewry in Hitler-occupied Poland is a richly detailed account of daily life in the ghetto This is probably the most ambitious book by Hersey, who also wrote Into the Valley, A Bell fo r Adana and Hiroshima. However Willingham 's novel Geraldine Bradshaw is anything but ambitious. It is hard to see what the author has to say, if anything, in this base novel. The story concern s itself chiefly wiith life in a Chicago hotel durin g wa11timeand the pursuit of a young bellhop for Geraldine, the elevator operator. The New Yorke r, which usually has something crisp to say, sums up its review of the book with "Mr. Willingham . .. was born only a few years ago, and knows and uses lots of naughty words." It ":ill probably ride hi gh on the best-seller lists.
-DICK FITZ. UNIVERSITYMESSENGER
ON OUR HONOR
The following article is the second of its type to appear in THE .MESSENGER; the first, titled ONE MAN 'S OPINION, appeared in the 11Diamond Jubilee " issue. Since there was some doubt as to the policy of the staff of the magazine concerning the honor system at the University of Richmond we decided that the other side of the question should be discussed.
We do not wish to go on record as being opposed to the honor system.-ED.
WHAT IS HONOR? Does it mean that you should not cheat on a test? Does it mean that you should not copy someone else' s work and submit it as your own? .My answer is that honor is the personification of truth to yourself and to others. It implies the ever-present concept "to thine own self be true" and a genuine respect for your fellow man's character and feelmgs.
Let us consider honor in reference to tests and examinations. Why not cheat if cheating means a better grade; and the conditions are such that no one will be the wiser? Perhaps no one will ever know the difference! But you will! Pride in individual achievement is the impetus for wholesome living. There can be no element of pride involved in a good grade if that grade is secured by wholesale cheating. Anyone can copy! And what about the other fellow-the one whose work you copied? There are many people who would not copy themselves but who haven't the character to refuse help to someone else. You are helping to belittle that already weak character by involving him in your escapade. This is far more serious than any grade you or he will ever make. If you are content with your own detrimental aittitudes-all right - but for goo dness sakes give the other fell ow a chance~he just might hate himself and you for his lack of strength. You know, honor is as strong as its weakest link!
The professors are also to be considered in terms of the honor system concept. Cheating definitely puts them on the spot. They are advised that we have an honor system and tha,t it is customary for the professor to leave the room while the students are taking a test. Now let's face it-no professor in his right mind is going to exhibit any trust in this method until his students have proved to him that APRIL, 1950
they can be trusted. Even if there is only one person in •the class who cheats, the professor is put on the defensive. Common sense indicates how many people are affected by one person's dishonesty, for no one lives in a vacuum.
From the standpoint of a Westhampton student , I assert that our honor system does work and by the very fact that it does, has lent dignity and respect to the platform on which our college government is built. As a freshman, you are asked to read the honor pledge and decide for yourself whether or not you are willing to sign it. If it is signed, that pledge becomes your contract with our system of government, pledging you to abide by the sitandards upheld by the school. The upperclassmen are a dominating force in the success of the honor system; for by observation it can be seen that we believe in thait pledge we signed and that we resent any infraction of it.
Because I have seen it work and work so efficiently , I believe that it can work on any college campus so long as each student realizes his own particular responsibility and carries it out to ,the best of his ability. Sixty per cent, ninety-five per cent of the students participating in the honor system cannot make it work. It takes one hundred per cent cooperation from the entire student body If you happen to number in the pathetic few who would rather go through life on someone else's shoulders, then my sincere advice to you is to enroll in a school which doesn ' t care how you pass so long as you pass. In other words, forget it!
It is the opinion of a few tha • t the sure cure to alleviate cheating is the proctor system. .May I ask whether or not these people consider themselves adults or children who must be continuously watched? College is preparatory training not only for future vocational plans but also for future living on an adult basis. A college should be able to face the problems that arise on a level somewhat above grade school. The proctor system in itself is a slam to those who are capable of depending on themselves for their own standards rather than someone who is appointed to make sure that they do; these people I am sure outnumber those who would prefer having an "inspector" around every time that they took a test.
The Honor System is essential! It can work. Let's make it work!
Mr. Salvadorof RochesterFalls
-by AL PITTMAN.
"We can't have any crazy man roaming our streets!"
IHA TE TO THINK of how our town has changed in the last five years," exclaimed the matronly Agatha Cradwell to her friends attending the Wednesday afternoon meeting of the Presbyterian Women's Missionary Circle. "Why, sometimes I wish we'd never let them build that factory."
Mrs. Prinder, president of the circle, was quick to agree with Agatha's sentiments. "You're exactly right, Aggie dear, that factory has done our Rochester Falls more harm than good-and mark my word, there's going to be even more trouble in the future!"
The sixteen other ladies nodded to give their unanimous sanction to Mrs. Prinder's somber prediction of things to come.
Mrs. Prinder continued. "Ladies, you remember what a lovely little community we used to have. Wihy, everyone knew it was the nicest town in three counties. Then that factory was constructed near the highway-and almost overnight all kinds of people began to pour into our little town. People that aren't like us at all! Poles, Italians, Hungarians-every kind of foreigner you can think of came to Rochester Falls to work in that factory."
"And a lot of Niggers, too," snorted Mrs. Thomas Powell.
"It's just terrible," whined the plump Miss Lucy Miller. "Frankly, I've never seen such queer people in all my days as these factory workers and their families!"
"Queer isn't the word, Lucy dear, they're plain crazy-and even dangerous!"
"And you know who the craziest one of all is! It's that fellow called Salvador who used to live above Kate Murphy's garage."
"He is that!" chimed in Mrs. Prinder. "Never says much. Just stares at you with those peculiar eyes. Makes one feel like he's looking right through you. Indeed, he's a queer one! You know Kate told him to leave when she discovered he's a Jew."
"A J I"ew.
"That's what Katie Murphy claims."
"But his name 1s Salvador-sounds kind of Spanish to me."
6
"Maybe he's a Spanish Jew," suggested Miss Jessie.
The other ladies agreed that this was probably the case. Fannie Talley wanted to know why he had recently lost his job at the factory. Agatha offered the reason. "My George," she began, "told me that although he was a pretty good carpenter at the factory, he was a troublemaker. The factory manager told George that he was really dangerous to have around. He used to talk to workers-and the things he said were very mdical-communistic and socialistic, I'm sure. Things like the Polocks being the same kind of people that we are. No doubt about it, he's a Communist. What foreigne r isn't? We let them come to America-and then they turn right around and want to change it! Anyway, the factory owners don't like his kind of talk so they fired him."
"Haven't you ladies heard about him breakin g up church services in the Baptist Church the othe r Sunday?" asked Agatha.
The ladies immediately keyed their ears to wha t she had to say.
"My friend, Mrs. Parker, said that one Sunda y morning as worship was about to begin, this Salgollo ... "
"No, it's Salvador," protested Miss Jessie.
"Well, Salvador, then ... this Salvador walke d right in the church, down the aisle, and sat in one of t:ihe main pews! You can just imagine ho w shocked the congregation was. To make matter s worse, ladies, can you imagine it, he didn't even have a suit on! He was there in working clothes! "
"Working clothes!" gasped the ladies.
"Yes, working clothes," replied Agatha.
Agatha continued. "Well, the people in the church didn't know what to do. My friend, Mr s. Parker, said her husband who is one of !:thedeacon s started to go and ask the man to leave. But then they decided it would be best just to ignore him All the deacons f el.t ignoring him would make hi m realize he was in a place where he didn't belon g. Then it really happened! When the Reveren d Hays started to pray ( naturally my friend, Mr s. Parker, bowed her head but kind-of kept one eye open and fixed on Salvador-or-whatever-his-nam eUNIVERSITY MESSENGER
is to see what he would do). Ladies, believe it or not, the man got down on his knees to pray!"
"Kneeling in a Baptist Church!" boomed Mrs. Prinder.
"Lord knows the man was in the wrong pew, if that's the case."
"Deacon Parker should have directed the kneeling Mr. Salvador to the Episcopalians up the street," suggested Mrs. Sally Newton.
"Shucks, Sally, what would those 'Piskies do with a carpenter? They' re the bankers!''
Salvador's act of kneeling for prayer touched Miss Jessie for she secretly confessed to friends that she was positive she had a strain of high churchism in her.
"Well, what finally happened?" urged Mrs. Powell.
"Nothing really-just that after the service nobody spoke to him. He was completely ignored. Of course poor Reverend Hays shakes hands with everyone after the preaching and so he found himself forced to shake hands with this man. But he made sure he didn't ask the troublemaker back. And as far as I know, he hasn't gone back. He knows where he isn't wanted."
" Don't be so sure, Aggie. Haven't you heard about his irrtrusion on the Methodists and the • Catholics?"
"No, Genoa, do tell us!"
"Why I thought all of you had heard."
Genoa Farden then proceeded to inform them that this same Salvador had also appeared at the Methodist Church one Sunday morning the same way he had appeared at the Baptist. But it was worse with the Methodists bemuse it happened to be Communion Sunday. Genoa told how he started down to the rail with the others when some quickthinking Methodist stewards hal ,ted him midway down the aisle-asked if he was a Methodi;t ( naturally his answer was "no." You could look at him and tell that!)-then they informed him they observed a closed-Communion-and triumphantly they escorted him to the church door!
The circle agreed you have to hand it to the Methodists when it comes to handling people like Salvador.
" What about his run-in with the Caitholics, Genoa?"
"Well, during the following week he had nerve enough to intrude on the annual Church Bazaar over at Saint Mary's. And I heard he caused quite a scene. Before they forced him out , he had APRIL, 1950
knocked over several of the booths the ladies had spent so much time in preparing. They say he acted in a shameful way. Why, just yesterday I heard that the priest w,ants him put away in some institution where there's no danger of him getting violent and hurting someone.
"He most definitely should be put away!"
"We can't have any crazy man roaming our streets!"
Mrs. Gresham refilled several cups with tea. The sugar and cream were passed ( Agatha Cradwell took four lumps). For a moment the strange Mr. Salvador was forgotten, but only for a moment.
"No doubt you know where our friend Mr. Salvador is staying since Mrs. Murphy gave him the boot."
"No, where?"
"Down among the shanties on Clay Street. Down with the Niggers and all the others like him."
"After all, water always seeks its own level, you know," Agatha added. "He discovered that he can't come crashing in on decent people-so he's gone back to his own. And here's hoping he'll stay!"
"He can't bother us down there."
"Well, he never really bothered me," confessed Mrs. Gresham.
"I usually just ignored him and all the others. What I didn't like about him was the odd way he'd look at you. With those foreign eyes, you know-. Why I'll never forget the night he came to my kitchen door and asked for something to eat after he had lost his job. It was a cold night in February. He said he was hungry. Well, it happened that we were going to the church supper that night, so I tried to explain to him that I just didn't have the time to give him anything. I tried to be very nice. But he just didn't seem to understand. Didn't say a word. He just stood there and kept looking at me in a way that sent shivers up and down my spine. Lord knows, I didn't know what he was about to do, so I called my husband. He came and he told Salvador to leave. Still, the fellow didn't say a word. He kept standing there looking at us. Finally my husband got mad. Told him to get and never to come back. With that he turned and vanished in the night. Guess I could have given him a bowl of soup, but like I said, we were going to the church supper and we were already late--. Later my husband told me never to give those foreigners
( Continu ed on pag e 13) 7
School Days-Estonian Style
as told by Piret Koljo to Barb Ferre
Are studies getting you weary? Club meetings making you tear? Is your datebook quite empty this week end? Or can't you decide what to wear?
I've got a suggestion to help you , Though it may seem a rather strange notion , But you ' d save yourself many decisions lf you'd study abroad , ' cross the oceap.
I'VE JUST COME BACK from a talk with Piret Koljo , our foreign student, where we were discussing some of the main differences between schools in her native Estonia and those in America. Result ? M y admiration for any European student who manages to survive long enough to get even a high school education has gone sky high .
It seems that their system is basically the same as ours in that they have grammar schools , high schools and universities . At that point they take off and leave us scholastically severa l laps behind. For instance , in their grammar schools the students start learning their foreign languages as early as the second grade . Their equivalents of our high schools really combine high school and junior college and are called gymnasiums ( no connection with athletics). These schools equip the students so thoroughly for the universities that when they do enter they have completed all of their required subjects and are ready to spend four years concentrating on their major and related fields.
The gymnasium students need not worry about what subjects to take; all their subjects are required and are no crip courses either. I asked Piret to give me a Httle idea as to what some of these subjects were and al1though my list is not complete it is still one that would scare many a good red-blooded American high school student half to death. Just imagine having had to conquer three foreign languages , our own language , various and assorted histories, philosophy , mathematics , trigonometry, algebra, plane geometry, analytic geometry, economics , astronomy, civics, history of art, history of drawing, physical sciences, gymnastics , four hours of handicrafts a week for girls and four of manual training for boys, singing, music, and choir among others before you could receive a diploma.
8
You are worried about having no dates this week end, you say? lf it's any consolation to you, jusit listen to this. Students in the gymnasiums are not allowed to date at all and if a young lady is seen arriving or leaving school with a boy frequently , the matter is taken up before the faculty and th e girl is asked to refrain from such unbecoming behavior. If students do date in their final year , which would correspond to our Sophomore year in college, they have to do it on the sly as discover y of their actions would expose them to public disapproval. You see, as Piret explains iit, in Estoni a they believe in keeping people young longer. Boys and girls of twelve and thirteen are still little children and youth of nineteen are too young to dat e.
Dating restrictions are not the only regulation s that we'd find strange. The girls are allowed t o wear neither nail polish nor lipstick. You thin k that's bad, Piret laughed , but before the war if a girl showed up to class wi,th her hair in a conditi on that the teacher felt was too curly, the unfortunat e victim was apt to have her head held under th e shower until the situation was remedied to th e faculty member's satisfaction.
Worried about what to wear: In Estonia you could relax and forget it. lf you were going to schooi you'd wear your everyday uniform. If it's to the theater or a school party you' re going you ha ve to wear your best uniform. Although the style is not usually prescribed for these uniforms, the color inevitably is and the students can be recognized instantly by their garb , making them exceedin g ly careful 1:onever act in a way that will reflect unfavorably on their Alma Mater.
It may seem as if all these rules and restricti ons would cause the students to lack self-confiden ce, but Piret hastened to point out that 1the stude nt s who have graduated from gymnasiums seem to have more independence than American stude nts of the same age who have had comparative .fr eeUNIVERSITY MESSENGER
dom for years. There aren't many of our young girls who are competent cooks, seamstresses, and housekeepers in addition to having a knowledge of crafts and a thorough scholastic background.
Tied up with club meetings? Most of us have come from schools where a great deal of emphasis was placed on extracurricular activities. It seems hard for us to realize that in Europe the opinion of faculty and students is against ,the existence of these activities. They believe in concentration on learning. To them a system such as ours is rather ridiculous since ·the students are so busy running from one activi,ty -to another they lose interest in the basic function of the school which is to give the student an educa,tion. Scholarship is considered so important that if a student does happen to join an organization, a failing grade in any subjeot will automatically disqualify him from membership in all groups, whether it be a literary club or the Boy Scouts.
There is an organization which many students join that should really interest us with our recent Honor System controversy. The clubs are known as Student Corporations and the only requirements are that the applicant must be a student art the time of joining and always fair in all phases of life. During the first year the applicants are known as " foxes." "Foxes" are in the same general category as "rats," "goats," "pledges," or whatever you want to call them here. They must obey the wishes of the members and learn all the qualifications for membership. After the "fox" period is over, the member receives his colors and becomes a member of the organization for life. The honor system is so highly prized that any member of rhe Corporation may be kicked out if it is discovered tha,t he has been unfair or dishonest in any way, even after his student days are over. In the period before and during the war the Student Corporations were not allowed in Germany and even in Estonia the corporations were not allowed to take in new members.
Don't foreign students find life dull? The answer is no. People in Estonia and other parts of Europe are full of enthusiasm for the out-of-door life. Hiking, picnicking, etc., are universally enjoyed and summer camps and camping trips are the favorite ways of spending the summer. Physical activities are so emphasized thait the students are even required to walk or take some other form of physical exercise daily for at least an hour aside from school.
APRIL, 1950
POETRY
To an Ex-Girl Friend on Learning She Is Getting }Harried
To you, Dear Girl, I write this stuff; To one who made my life so rough; I once thought you sweet and fairBefore the peroxide turned your hair.
Your nails were filed with meticulous (are. -Even though you cut them square; Your eyes as soft as limpid pools Also made my hound dogs drool.
Oh once you made me feel so silly Back when you were just a filly. Now I don't care, it's plain to see, Since you are pushing twenty-three.
Now on closely looking one espies Great big circles under your eyes; Once you could have made life complete, But now, Dear, you're just obsolete! -OMAR.
The difference between the olden days and the present days is that women used to faint; now they pass out.
She: "I can't marry you honey, I'm anemic."
He: "That's all right dear, you go to your church and I'll go to mine."
He: "Men of my type are not running loose."
She: "Of course not; that is what the police depaDtment is for."
Dr. Wiley ( after final exam): "Well, what did you think of this course?"
Student: "I thought that it was a very allinclusive course. Everything that was not covered during the year was covered on the final exam."
THE TEETH OF THE MATTER
The dentist meets a woman with a perfect set of teeth
·REGINALD JAMES CURRY had wanted to be an archeologist ever since he was seven and had found four flint arrowheads in a clay mound behind the cemetery in Middleton , Indiana. After that he dug for things in the ground every time he had the chance . He liked digging.
So when the time came for the exodus from the home nest he went ,to Princeton-a university in New Jersey-to study ancient history and geology because he thought these things would prove helpful to an archeologist.
He liked Princeton . Everyone seemed so friendly in their black knit ties. His schoolmates affectionately called him R.J. The library was enchanting with many volumes on ancient ruins in this century or that , and whenever he wasn ' t in classes or down at Renwick's drinking a little egg in chocolate milk (Reginald James Curry never drank anything stronger than a little egg in chocolate milk) he was in the library drinking in the dust of these ancient ruins . Whenever he found anythin g that interested him , he copied it down in a little red morocco giltedged notebook in which he kept notes on archeology.
He went to all the football games because it was rather expected, and in his sophomore year he joined the Tower Club. He liked the club-except for week ends when it was overflowing with giggling, chattering girls that would talk to hirri (Reginald did not like giggling, chattering girls and he had never seen any to which these adjectives did not apply ) But the girls would storm his corner and would talk. (Reginald James Curry had dark brown eyes and brown curly hair and looked as though he might play football after a poetic and a rtistic manner.) But he never said more than hello and went right on reading about the new excavations in New Guinea.
There at Tower he met another boy who liked J. S. Bach as much as he did. (Bach was Reginald's other passion.) For hours he and Ronald Williamson would listen to fugues and masses and invent~ons, and then •they would discuss the horizontal logic of Bach far into the night.
It was under the influence of Ronald Williamson and J.S Bach ' s B Minor Mass that Reginald first became interested in dentistry Ronald wa s 10
going to be a dentist and sometimes after they had discussed fugues and masses, Ronald would speak lovingly of incisors and molars. At first Reginald listened with studied politeness which meant h e was thinking of the Rosetta stone. But by and by as Ronald told him fabulous tales of America's number one enemy, dental caries , Reginald found that after all, dentistry was quite interesting, almost as challenging as archeology After all, both rathe r involved digging-and Reginald loved to dig
One April night as Reginald and Ronald wer e listening to Bach's B Minor Mass , suddenly quit e suddenly Reginald had a vision, as it were, of th e human mouth, all resplendent with thirty-two teet h as white and majestic as Parian marble.
The last strains quivered and were gone out int o the soft night. There was a poignant interval of silence, and then Reginald leaned forward an d grasped Ronald's arm. " Old man ," he said rath er hoarsely, ' Tm going to be a dentist. " There wer e tears in Ronald's eyes.
Then by way of celebration, the two went dow n to Renwick ' s and had two slabs of apple pie apie ce and numerous eggs in chocolate milk. It mark ed the high point in Reginald ' s life .
So Reginald switched his major to chemist ry, and two years later when he graduated fr om Princeton , Mag na cum l aud e, he and Ronald went to dental school in Philadelphia There th ey learned how to be good dentists, and now wh en they listened to Bach in the evenings, they wou l d discuss that magical element fluorine and its effect on dental caries Reginald was quite sure that if h e and Ronald worked hard enough they could per£ect a fluorine treatment that would eliminate nin ety per cent of all dental decay Ronald held the op inion that as prospective dentists they were rath er defeating their own purpose. But after many evenings of Bach and the raking over of dental eco· nomics, Ronald was convinced that a per£ected fluorine treatment eliminating ninety per cent of dental decay was the crying need of the twenti eth century, and the two pioneers felt quite inspired
Before either of them realized it, •they had twin diplomas in twin black frames hanging in twin ( and adjoining) offices on a very swank street in New York. Dr. R eginald James Curry looked most UNIVERSITYMESSENGER
monumental on the shingle, and all the equipment was shiny and new. He and Ronald hired a girl with the fabulous name, Miss Gettsendiner, but here all sensation ended, for Miss Gettsendiner wore very thick -lenses and had brownish hair and brownish skin and a brownish voice, but at least she knew an incisor from a molar, and she neither giggled nor chattered.
At night Reginald and Ronald listened to Bach and worked on the fluorine treatments, and after a little egg in chocolate milk, went to bed. They were both most happy.
One day a young lady with a good Fifth Avenue address and furs came to Reginald to have her teeth checked. Reginald was rather under the impression that this Miss Rowena Thomas had very black hair and very blue eyes, but of course, her teeth were actually the thing that most interested him.
"Now open wide, Miss Thomas." And Miss Thomas obligingly displayed a mouthful of alabaster teeth. Reginald took his little pick and went to work, digging and tapping and picking, humming the first movement of Brandenburg Concerto Number Four in a soft monotone all the while. It was odd. It was amazing. It was phenomenal. Miss Thomas apparently had a perfect set of teeth. They were as white and small and regular as the heroine's in the tooth paste ad. Braces in her mouth would have been a waste of time and money. She had no fillings and showed no signs of needing any.
Reginald sighed. The per£ ect set of teeth. Oh the beauty of such a rarity! Suddenly, with a guilty blush he realized that he was staring at the young lady's small and handsomely turned ankles. They, too, were per£ect.
"Nonsense," sniffed Reginald, "no one could live twenty-one years and still have perfect teeth, considering the diet of this decadent and sweettoothed age." (Miss Thomas' patient's card attested to the fact that she was twenty-one.) And so with professional determination he once again attacked the mouth of the young lady before him.
"Ouch;" purred the lady, and Reginald apologized profusely and resumed his digging in a gentler manner. At this close range her eyes were as softly blue as the summer skies over Middleton, Indiana. Reginald found himself wishing that Miss Thomas' teeth were in a shocking state of decay, so that there should be many more appointments in proximity with those wonderful eyes.
But alas, not one cavity could he find. Her teeth were as perfect as Bach's Air for the G String. Just to be sure he checked a third time, but in vain.
Reginald assisted Miss Thomas down from the chair. She came just to his shoulders, and he felt masculine and protective. Distractedly he noticed that perfection did not stop with her teeth and ankles. Closed, her mouth was even more enchanting than when it yawned open to display its ivory loveliness. At this moment her little red lips curved in a smile.
She promised that she would return in four months to have her teeth checked. (Her voice sounded as if it never unnecessarily contorted its sweetness into giggling and ·chattering.) · Four months seemed equivalent to eternity's final hour. Long after she had left he seemed to smell the perfume-subtle, of course--that she wore, and see her blue eyes and perfect teeth and perfeot ankles.
Now the evenings seemed as run down as a victrola someone forgot to turn off. Bach seemed far too logical and was colorless and unimaginative in his ears. He played over the Largo movement of Bach's F Major Concerto and its transparent melody reminded him of •the glossy teeth of Miss Rowena Thomas. But as the last movement trotted logically along, Reginald felt very despondent. He suggested to Ronald that they buy some Tschaikovsky. But Ronald was horrified. Tschaikovsky was bourgeoisie and sentimental, sloppily arranged emotion.
"It's the small things about him that I like. He has a small fortune, a small yacht, a small convertible ... "
APRIL, 1950
"Why Reginald, I'm quoting you when I say it's sloppily arranged emotion." Reginald nodded sadly. He thought that it would be rather soothing. Ronald would talk of fluorine, but Reginald felt depressed. Reginald complained of a headache, and went to bed munching aspirin and dreaming of Rowena's molars and ankles.
As the apathetical days dragged by, Reginald's one thought was the day in September when his love would come back to have her teeth checked. He had never felt more miserable. He broke his most prized recording of sixteenth century lute music, and took to wearing bow ties instead of the hallowed black knit neckwear of his alma mater. He dreamed of an early death.
* * *
The mouselike Miss Gettsendiner scurried in and squeaked, "Telephone, Dr. Curry."
And over the phone sounded a voice that could never be unnecessarily contorted into a giggle or a chatter, a voice as soft as summer wind whispering in the trees of Middleton, Indiana. It was Miss Rowena Thomas.
It wrung his heart when she told him of the horrible toothache that had suddenly come. She thought it needed immediate attention. Reginald thought so too. And so the rendezvous was settled for twelve the next day.
That night Bach sounded like a choir of angels playing harpsichords.
The next day was perfection itself, and Reginald stopped by the florist shop and ordered three dozen red roses for the reception room. He explained to the perplexed Ronald that the austere and handsomely cold reception room needed a homey touch.
At 12:05 Miss Rowena Thomas was ushered in, all perfection and subtle perfume. Once more Reginald gazed into the mouth of perfect teeth.
"Now which tooth was it, Miss Thomas?"
And her little pink tongue wandered enchantingly to her second molar on the upper right gum. Reginald had never seen a more perfect molar. And the surrounding gum was pink and firm and flat.
In bell-like tones Miss Thomas explained how the pain had come in the middle of the night and ravaged the ,tooth, and how she had wrestled with the pain for a day and a night and ,another day. But surprisingly enough this morning it had gone as mysteriously as it came. But she had thought it best to come to him anyway.
12
Pain had left the tooth blamelessly perfect. Reginald commented on the lack of inflammation of the alveolar periosteum of the molar.
Rowena went into gay liittle gales of laughter -in no wise near kin to a giggle. She hadn't the vaguest idea what an alveolar periosteum was . And boldly Reginald offered to explain it to her that night at dinner.
But that night at dinner they did not speak of alveolar periosteums at all. As a matter of fac t Reginald wasn ' t quite sure what Rowena said-he r voice dipped and wheeled and was altogether mor e charming than Bach's Well-Tempered Clavichord Later he could never remember whether they ha d stuffed pheasant at Maxim's or pancakes at Joe' s All he could think of was Rowena, even more resplendent at night than by day, and gowne d beautifully in black satin.
Then they were at Nick's-suddenly~and it was very late, and the combo was playing a swirling extravaganza of dissonants that were rather writhing in chromatic agony-Reginald though t -Not Bach, of course, but not bad. He reflected that martinis were even nicer than a little egg in chocolate milk, and that Rowena was the nicest thing on earth , and that even the word nice w as nKe.
Rowena was giggling, Rowena was chatterin g, Rowena was calling him Reggie, dear, and Rowena's per£ ect teeth were flashing.
Breathlessly he heard her say that what she really wanted in life was a home in a midweste rn small town where life could be charming and beautifully modulated.
Reginald James Curry caught her hand and closed his eyes. He could see a little white cotta ge and as he walked to the door there was the ad orable and charming Rowena. And from the ho use came strains of Bach, and the giggling and chattering of three little girls, all blue eyed, all bl ack haired, all with perfect sets of teeth .
"Reggie, dear, pay attention. I just said I l ove hot jazz."
"No classics?"
"Horrors, no."
"Not even Bach?"
"Bach! Oh I despise and loathe Bach."
Reggie sighed and caught her hand-"My de ar," he said softly, "so do I."
-BETTY B. CATHER UNIVERSITY MESSENGER
MR. SALVADOR
( Continned from pag c 7) anything. He said they'll always take advantage of any kindness you show them."
Agatha told Mrs. Gresham that her husband was absolutely correct. "Give a Jew an inch and he'll take a mile!"
Details of Salvador's activities on Clay Street were supplied by Judith Prinn. "Why the people he has made friends with down in the shanties are even scorned by the Niggers and the Polacks ! I've heard he eats with the worst of them every day in that dingy little caf e near the brickyard. Why with my very own eyes I've seen him with that woman Mabel Magdal ! And ladies you know what kind of a woman she is!''
"A hussy," retorted Mrs. Powell.
"The harlot of Babylon!" added Agatha.
Mabel Magdal-a common harlot, Peter Ridzidski-the repulsive Polock bartender, and the worthless Nigger, John Andrew-these were Salvador's friends. These were the ones listening to his babblings. These were the ones offering him a home. Mr. Salvador has found his kind and his friends! Mrs. Gresham, be glad you didn't desecrate your kitchen by feeding him. Let the whore, the bartender, and the Nigger who runs the numbers racket feed him! Let them and the rest of the scum of Clay Street take care of him. He's one of them. We don't want him!
Rochester Falls witnessed the most successful Easter it could remember. Everybody said so. Merchants were jubilant. By Saturday, retail sales had brought in thousands of dollars. The manager of the Emporium remarked, "it's just like having Christmas in April!" Mr. Potter of Potter ' s Specialty Shop said he was sure that if the merchants would go about Easter in the right way that in a few years Easter profits would easily equal Christmas profits. "And that ain't hay," he added.
The customers were happy, too. Stocks were plentiful. Cash was plentiful. Easter eggs , chocolate eggs , jelly beans, white rabbits, baby chicks, noisy little ducklings. Everything to make a perfect Easter was theirs. Miss Ida's Hat Shoppe was almost emptied of its creations. Big hats, little hats, straw ha.ts, felt hats, veiled hats, and flowered hats. All were sold. Miss Ida jokingly said that a customer even bought one of the lampshades in the shop.
CHRIST THE LORD IS RISEN TODAY '
APRIL, 1950
SONS OF MEN AND ANGELS SAY! RAISE YOUR JOYS AND TRIUMPHS HIGH, SING YE HEAVENS AND EARTH REPLY!
The interiors of the churches were bedecked with the green of the palms and the white splendor of the lilies .
HALLELUJAH, KING OF KINGS AND LORD OF LORDS, HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH, AND HE SHALL REIGN FOREVER AND EVER, HALLELUJAH!
The minister was at his best. His sermon was pure prose, polished like marble. The congrega,tion was proud of Reverend Linden. And Reverend Linden was proud of himself.
HE LIVES , HE LIVES, CHRIST JESUS LIVES TODAY. HE WALKS WITH ME, HE TALKS WITH ME ALONG LIFE'S ROCKY WAY!
The silver collection plates were crammed with crisp green bills. Three additional ushers were required just to take up the offering!
ALLELUIA! THE THREE SAD DAYS ARE QUICKLY SPED. HE RISES GLORIOUS FROM THE DEAD! ALLELUIA!
Men in new spring suits, women arrayed in exclusive gowns and glorious bonnets. Mrs. Powell's hat of violets was sweet, but Agatha knew her swish of yellow veil put it to shame. Mrs. Powell had wan:ted the hat, but Agatha had successfully beaten her to it~ And now with it crowning her brow, Agatha Cradwell could be triumphant.
LO , HE COMES WITH CLOUDS DESCENDING, ONCE FOR OUR SALVATION SLAIN: THOUSAND THOUSAND SAINTS ATTENDING SWELL THE TRIUMPH OF HIS TRAIN: ALLELUIA! CHRIST, THE LORD, RETURNS TO REIGN!
ALLELUIA! ALLELUIA! ALLELUIA!
* * *
Outside the churches of Rochester Falls, in the glorious sun of the Resurrection Morning, a lone man climbed the hill road leading away from the town. He stopped and turned to take a last look at the town with its shingled roofs and shining spires below him. The man was Salvador. For a time, he g azed down upon Rochester Falls. Then suddenly, he fell to his knees there in the road. He raised his head and arms skyward. His outstretched hands revealed the ug l y scars on his palms. The sun beamed on his thorn-bruised brow. In anguish, his voice cried out, "Father , forgive ,them, for they know not what they do! "
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Miller & Rhoads' Fashions
How is this for a spring treat?
A pretty girl, a handsome escort ... Who could ~sk for anything more? Jane Pitt wears one of the new belted shirtwaist suits, accessorized with Cinnabar shoes and the young man is dressed by the Men's Corner in a lightweight grey worsted, with colors of his tie repeated in the handkerchief.
Fashions by Miller & Rhoads.
Wear your learning like your watch, in a private pocket; and do not pull it out and strike it, merely to show that you have one. If you are asked what o'clock it is, tell it, but do not proclaim it hourly and unasked, like the watchman.
B
C - LORD CHESTERFIELD.
QUESTIONS
You'll see DD in ABC
If you look intently at the magic B. A prefix for three, and like two in a pod, Will give you my name, and the letters are odd. Take homo sapiens: one who's youthful, With Good Hope's rival: we're being truthful.
ANSWERS WILL APPEAR IN THE NEXT ISSUE OF YOUR MAGAZINE
LAST MONTH'S ANSWERS & WINNERS
A BARBARA HALE. An arrow is a "barb"; a constellation is "Ara"; hearty is "hale."
B THE FIGURE 4, is made by the manner in which the Stork's legs are crossed.
C MULLINS. To heat and spice is "mull." ;Add taverns (inns) and the whole answer becomes Mullins. WINNERS
Jesse R. Overstreet, Jr.
Alvin Livesay
Kenneth E. Motto
Bill Browne
Richard M. Smith Al Pittman
Robert Allen Fountaine Everette \"I('eakley
Bernie Stokes E. L. Musick
... andJesseL.Tripp
PR MINENTTOBACCOFARMER says-"Chesterfie Id always buys the ripest and best tobacco I sell. They hove what I like in a cigarette They taste better and smoke cooler. " JeMJ?.t..7iw,.,.. ':i: AYDEN, N. C.