Jewish News Supplement - Food & Romance (February 2024) by United Jewish Federation of Tidewater

Food & Romance Dear Read ers, R I S TOR A N T E I N S P I R E D

B Y

I TA LY

A quick internet search for “food and romance” turns up seemingly countless films, books, places to dine, gift ideas, and recipes. Clearly, there’s no shortage of ways to make the connection between the two. And we’re doing the same with this special section. To make the point, Stephanie Peck asked several couples of varied ages to recall their first “date meal.” Their responses are fun and sentimental, and readers might even feel the start of a romance. Do you remember your first meal together as a couple? This collection starts on page 21. Although Alene Jo and Ron Kaufman probably recall their first meal together (we didn’t ask them), for this section they write about going through the emotional and meaningful experience of planning for the financial future of their family and of Jewish Tidewater with Tidewater Jewish Foundation. Their article is on page 29. For last month’s Shabbat of Love, a 35-foot-long challah was braided, baked, and presented at a congregation in New York’s Upper West Side with hopes of making it into the Guinness World Records. The challah’s story – which involved two states, two bakeries, lots of hands, and an 18-wheeler – can be found on page 28. The article on page 24 about Israelis determined to find their match while a war is taking place highlights both a desire for love and a positive attitude that life will, in fact, return to normal. It’s difficult to have romance without a heart, and since February is Heart Month, we asked Tom Purcell, Simon Family JCC’s Wellnes Director, to offer some heart-healthy advice. Page 26. However you find and express romance, choose your menu, and keep your heart healthy, all of us at Jewish News wish you lots of good tastes and love.

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Food & Romance

FIRST DATES, FIRST MEALS

hile not every first date is centered around a meal, most involve some sort of dining, even if it’s not fancy fare or a sit-down meal. When Jewish News asked these couples to share their first dining experiences together, one unexpected result was that the settings ranged from shorts to black-tie. No matter the circumstances or what was on the menu, the dates must’ve all received a five-star rating.

Lindsay and Ross Bangel (as told by Lindsay)

ur first dinner together was in Norfolk in December 2010. I was home for Christmas break, and Ross asked if he could take me to dinner at Luna Maya. I had never been there, but he knew what to order. I just couldn’t believe how good the food was – and as I am complimenting every bite, he’s smiling and laughing at me, because it’s no secret, I love food. We love food. This night was beyond special, because I knew this night, I had a guy that is not only going to be my forever eating partner – he is someone I can be myself around and vice versa. He has always brought out the best in me, and I feel this dinner made us realize how similar our childhoods, family, morals, and values were. It was the beginning of a future we were beyond excited to explore. Luna Maya will forever and always dance on our stage of memories!

Carol and David Hirschler (as told by David)

ur first date, when we went out to eat, was in April in Lexington, Kentucky. We went to Wings Teahouse for dinner. We had egg rolls, sweet and sour chicken, and beef and broccoli. And, of course, fortune cookies.

Terri and Steve Budman (as told by Steve)

y first date with Terri was at a family wedding for Audrey Aleck and Scott Koltun on Memorial Day weekend in 1994. More than what we ate, what I remember was walking into Congregation Beth El and being scrutinized by her elegant pair of elderly aunts. They smiled and let me pass with Terri, so I guess that was approval. Catered by Ruby Swartzchild, the spread was gracious and generous with steak and salmon, lots of vegetables, and four or five desserts. (I was hooked!) After some spirited dancing, a cousin of Terri’s approached and asked, “How long have you been dating?” Terri and I both looked at our watches and said, “Oh, about a couple of hours.”

Ronnie and Marcus Friedman (as told by Marcus)

e remember the first date vividly. . . June 13, 1958. We went to the Ocean View Amusement Park to ride the roller coaster and everything else that moved. The meal was cotton candy! It was warm, but not hot, which made dashing from the Ferris Wheel to the Merry-GoRound fun. I grabbed her hand. . .a bold move on my part! jewishnewsva.org | February 12, 2024 | JEWISH NEWS | 21

Food & Romance Amy and Mark Metzger (as told by Amy)

O Jody and David Laibstain (as told by Jody)

avid and I had our first date on January 5, 1991. It was a blind date. He took me to Shine Shine Palace at Waterside. I definitely remember what we ate. He suggested ordering the whole fish; it was fun taking it apart and sharing it as part of our first date. It was also delicious. When I recently asked him why he ordered the fish, he said he had it before and wanted to share it. I think he wanted to impress me!

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ur first meal together is hard to quantify after all these years. We were friends for nearly a decade before we officially dated, and we shared many dinner parties with our group of friends. Our first “date” meal together would have been around the summer of 2009 at the Polaris restaurant in Atlanta, Georgia. It was especially memorable as it is a revolving rooftop restaurant and Mark had made the reservation well in advance to surprise me!

Food & Romance Shikma and Danny Rubin (as told by Danny)

S Lisa and Howard Roesen (as told by Lisa)

t was the summer of 1993. I was living in the D.C. area and just got back from a singles mission to Israel. A girl named Marcy was on my trip, and we became fast friends. She grew up in Newport News, and one of her best friends was a guy named Howard. She thought Howard and I would make a great couple. He had just finished his podiatric residency program and was living in Virginia Beach. Marcy convinced me to meet her in Dewey Beach, Delaware for the weekend to celebrate her birthday and meet Howard. Howard and I literally met on the beach in our bathing suits! Later that evening, we hung out at the bars with our friends. At the end of the night, while walking me back to the place I was staying, we stopped at Grotto’s Pizza, sat on the curb, and shared a pie. Thirty years later, whenever we are on the Eastern Shore heading north, we always stop at Grotto’s. It’s a special place to us….and they have great pizza too!

hikma and I met for the first time on a blind date in April 2010. We were set up by Dana Rosen, a longtime family friend. We met at Gordon Biersch at Town Center (today that location is Three Notch'd Brewery). I did not know what Shikma looked like. Truly, it was a blind date. I'm pretty sure we just had drinks and not a full meal. The first date led to a second...and a third... and now we've been married 11 years and have two kids!

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Food & Romance ‘I want to get married before a rocket lands on my head’: War has amped up Israel’s passion for matchmaking Deborah Danan (JTA) — Katie Silver had already mastered volunteering and racing to safe rooms when she hopped on another Israeli wartime trend. Silver, a pilates instructor in Jerusalem, logged onto a Facebook group called Secret Tel Aviv and announced that she was looking for love. Like many single 30-somethings, Silver had tried dating apps but felt burned out. But she saw something different in what was happening in the Secret Tel Aviv group, where diverse residents of Israel’s hippest city — and, increasingly, others from elsewhere in the country — were furiously posting their personal details and romantic ambitions. In the flood of beach photos and biographies, she detected a national mood that matched her own. “There’s a sense of urgency of creating togetherness, family, community, and bringing more good people into the world with good values … not to let evil win out,” Silver says. “To celebrate life and have joy and simcha and weddings and bar mitzvahs and, of course, to make more Jewish babies so the population numbers can go back up.” She adds, “Plus, I want to get married before a rocket lands on my head.” According to Secret Tel Aviv’s administrator, Jonny Stark, the matchmaking trend began in the first weeks of the war amid daily rocket fire, with posts from people seeking to find “the one to run to the bomb shelter with.” Those soon morphed into more general personal ads, which peaked in December but have continued since, increasingly with humorous twists on the theme. Hundreds of posts seeking partners poured into the group. Posters include new members like Liat Admati MacKie from Be’eri, one of the “envelope” communities near Gaza that was hardest hit on Oct. 7, and veteran members like Ben Raul Maizel, whose humorous post racked up more than 4,000 likes. Maizel’s post reads: “I want to take my girlfriend to a B&B in the north. Can anyone recommend a girlfriend?” “People are looking for connection,” Stark says. “I’m super happy about it. The goal of Secret Tel Aviv is to help people connect and this is a great example of it happening.” The Facebook group is hardly the only example of wartime matchmaking on overdrive. In the days after Hamas’ Oct. 7 attack on Israel, as soldiers massed on the border with 24 | JEWISH NEWS | February 12, 2024 | jewishnewsva.org

Gaza, pictures of soldiers flexing their “miluim mustaches” — using the Hebrew word for reserve duty — punctured the somber mood. Some noted that they were single and would be available once they were released from duty. Just a few days into the ground war, an Orthodox influencer who had been called up posted that his unit received, among the letters of support from people at home and abroad, a note from a young woman who was

looking for love. The woman shared that Rabbi Nachman of Breslov, an influential Hasidic rabbi from the early 19th century, taught that wars “are about moving people around so that single people can find each other.” The message may be apocryphal, but it left a mark on the unit and later that night, they tried to connect the woman with a friend in the army, Arky Staiman, said on Instagram. “It didn’t end up working out, but the message was very interesting,” Staiman says, before issuing a charge to his followers to each identify three people to set up after the war. “There are girls and guys, single people, who are alone right now alone in Israel, alone throughout the world. It’s probably very scary. And I think that this is a perfect opportunity to try and set them up.” Actress Maya Wertheimer, one of Israel’s most widely followed social media influencers, has peppered her accounts with singles ads since the beginning of the war. She has used her Instagram platform to showcase soldiers who are looking for love, sharing their basic details along with pictures of the men in and out of uniform — often submitted by their sisters and friends. Other influencers, including the American-Israelis

Kerry Bar-Cohn, a dancer with almost 30,000 Instagram followers, and Aleeza Ben Shalom, the celebrity matchmaker, have sought to highlight soldiers who are single, as well as comfort the love-lorn. “These guys, our soldiers, who are out there and they are fighting — a lot of them are single. And when they come back, we’ve got male and female soldiers and they are looking for soulmates,” Ben Shalom told her followers in December. “So, if you are looking for your soulmate, it just might be a soldier, so hang in there, they are going to take care of everything and then they’re going to come back and marry you.” And in New York City, an Orthodox synagogue launched a matchmaking initiative in response to the war in November. Hundreds of people signed up within days, and at least a few relationships have started. “Everyone’s trying to figure out what to do from here,” Avital Chizhik-Goldschmidt, the congregation’s co-founder and rebbetzin, told the New York Jewish Week at the time. “I felt very much that the best way to respond to darkness and death is to bring in more light and more love and to bring people joy. Traditionally, that is the Jewish response to catastrophe.” Stark understands the impulse to find a partner well. One of the reasons he founded Secret Tel Aviv — where anything from parking places (or the lack thereof) to the best ramen in the city is discussed — was to find a partner. He ultimately found one elsewhere and now has two children — but his group has taken on a life of its own since its launch in 2010. It has exploded to nearly half a million members — exceeding the size of Tel Aviv’s entire population — and at one point even counted Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg among them. The potential for pairing up is huge. Stark says he knows about at least three couples who met and married through posts on Secret Tel Aviv. While it may be too early to tell if this round of posts had yet had the desired effect, he is trying to stack the deck in their favor: Secret Tel Aviv has partnered with DateNight, a platform that hosts online speed dating nights, and recently attracted more than 150 people to one event. Members of the Facebook group have reported wide-ranging experiences. Noa Salant, 40, says she had

& gotten direct messages only from “some perverts and a married man.” Shlomit Pery, 65, says she had been bombarded with responses to her post, one of the most-liked in the group — but mostly from people who say they were impressed that she had the courage to put herself out there at her age. In a Hebrew-language post, Silver, who immigrated to Jerusalem from London in 2012, included a brief biography and several photos of herself. She said she was only searching for a serious relationship before ending the post quipping: “I hope you all find ‘the one’ so that this group can return to being a place to advertise apartments instead of ourselves.” She says she was so overwhelmed with offers of dates that she had to turn off her phone — and when she finally went on a few, she didn’t find a lasting match. “It hasn’t led to love — yet — but it’s been eye opening,” Silver says. “It’s also allowed me to be much more honest about what I’m looking for. It removed the stigma. You’re no longer too proud or too embarrassed to put yourself out there because you sort of see that we’re all in the same boat, looking for love.” Some group members have lambasted the trend, charging that it distracts from the original purpose of Secret Tel Aviv or is even a catfishing effort by Hamas to collect information about Israelis. But others say simply watching the posts unfold has kept them connected to others at a challenging time. Limor Stika, who did not put up a post herself but who commented on several others’, says it made sense that the war was bringing the trend to the fore. “In times of crisis and wars, people want support and love, comfort,” Stika says. “Someone to hug and vent to.” Recently, Wertheimer posted news of a success story. “I must tell you that because of you I got to know my partner of the last three months,” read a note she posted on. “I thank you very much. There’s no doubt that he is the best match for me in the world.” The note came with five heart emojis and a comment from Wertheimer: “Yalla, friends, we’ve waited long enough!”

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Food & Romance

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February is Heart Month: Tune it up!

Tom Purcell he heart is the engine that circulates oxygen throughout the blood stream to keep the body vital. A continuous engine, the heart can run for more than 100 years without stopping. With an electrical current that’s not plugged into a wall, the heart is a self-contained energy source of complex cells. When working efficiently, the heart will beat on average between 60 and 90 beats per minute. This constantly working engine supplies the blood’s oxygen through the body via vessels and arteries – very similar to a car’s engine moving fluid (gas and oil) throughout the vehicle so it can run. For someone who lives to be 80 years old with an average heart rate of 80 beats per minute, the heart would beat more than 3.3 billion times! Cardiovascular exercise can help maintain the involuntary muscles of the heart so it can continue with a strong stroke volume to produce the strength necessary to regulate oxygen for life. While a car is taken for a tune up every three months or 3,000 miles Tom Purcell to operate properly, cardiovascular exercise should be conducted weekly, if not daily, for the heart/engine to perform at a high level. So, take a walk, go for a swim, or join a gym to “tune up" your heart “engine” today to ensure a smooth ride traveling through life. –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Tom Purcell is Simon Family JCC’s wellness/fitness director. He may be reached at tpurcell@simonfamilyjcc.org.

Food & Romance Michael Solomonov’s famous Zahav hummus now available at Whole Foods — with kosher certification

( JTA) — Israeli-American celebrity chef Michael Solomonov’s renowned hummus has only been available in his Philadelphia and New York City restaurants — until now. Hummus, using the recipe from Zahav, Solomonov’s flagship Philadelphia restaurant, is now available at more than 150 Whole Foods stores. The packaged hummus, like that at Zahav, doesn’t use oil — just a lot of tahini. Unlike the hummus at Zahav, however, it is certified kosher, bringing the recipe to a new cohort of customers. The Whole Foods expansion comes at a tense time for Israeli food, with fights spurred by the Israel-Hamas war that have ensnared both hummus and Solomonov in multiple ways. In December, one of the James Beard Award-winning chef’s kosher falafel restaurants, Goldie, was targeted by pro-Palestinian activists in Philadelphia. Protesters chanted, “Goldie, Goldie, you can’t hide, we charge you with genocide.” Protest organizers said they were targeting the restaurant over its $100,000 donation to the Israeli emergency medical organization United Hatzalah. Their critics, who included Jewish leaders in

Philadelphia, said the protest inappropriately targeted an Israeli over the actions of the Israeli government. A fracture in Solomonov’s longtime friendship with the Palestinian chef Reem Kassis had already become public. Kassis, who also lives in Philadelphia, told the New York Times that she and Solomonov were no longer speaking several weeks into Israel’s war in Gaza. “My experience of late has confirmed for me that food diplomacy does not work and that you cannot solve problems like the Israeli occupation of Palestine over the proverbial plate of hummus,” Kassis told the newspaper. (Solomonov did not comment for the story.) And Sabra-brand hummus products were reportedly vandalized in suburban Philadelphia supermarkets in December, with stickers advising shoppers to boycott Israeli products placed on their packages. The vandalism came amid renewed allegations that Israel has culturally appropriated hummus and other foods that are Palestinian in origin — including in a 1,000-signatory petition by food industry professionals. For Solomonov, hummus is personal.

He decided to focus his culinary career on Israeli and Jewish food after his brother was killed while serving in the Israeli army. David Solomonov volunteered to swap shifts with another soldier who wanted to attend synagogue on Yom Kippur in 2003; he was shot to death by a sniper. Solomonov co-founded Zahav, the restaurant known for its hummus, salads, and skewers, with entrepreneur Steve Cook in 2008. They are the coowners of CookNSolo Group, which also owns Goldie, Laser Wolf, Merkaz, and K’Far.

While Zahav is not kosher-certified, the restaurant does not mix meat and dairy and does not serve pork or shellfish, in keeping with traditional Jewish dietary customs. Its hummus is one of its specialties. “It’s the dish that brings people to the restaurant in the first place,” Solomonov said in a statement on Instagram, of hummus. “And more often than not, it is what brings people back. There’s something transcendent about the perfect bowl of hummus that tells our guests they’re in the right place.”

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Food & Romance

A 35-foot challah in NYC attempts to break a Guinness World Record in time for Shabbat of Love

JFNA Vladimir Kolenikov

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JFNA Vladimir Kolenikov

in attendance was Manhattan Borough President Mark easier to measure. (New York Jewish Week) — New York City kitchens Levine. Eisenman says she reached out to the Orthodox are notoriously small. Nonetheless, on Friday, Jan. 19, “I was shocked it was edible actually,” Eisenman jokes, Union for help with logistics and they immediately Congregation Rodeph Sholom on the Upper West Side adding that although the bake was “doughy” in parts, jumped on board. unveiled a 35-foot-long challah that they and their partcommunity members of all ages ners hope will break a world record. were excited to dig in. The gargantuan loaf was made Eisenman says the collaboin collaboration with the Jewish Federations of North America and ration between the Orthodox the Orthodox Union with the aim Union, the non-denominational of besting the current record-holJFNA, and Rodeph Sholom, a historic Reform congregation der: a challah baked in Australia in with many Israeli members, is 2019 that was just over 32 feet. “exactly the kind of unifying The 35-foot challah — braimessage we need right now.” ded in Borough Park and baked in The challah measured 35 feet, New Jersey before being trans2 inches, Eisenman says. JFNA ported to the Reform synagogue and the Orthodox Union sent the — was made in honor of Shabbat measurements and video evidence of Love, a JFNA initiative that to the Guinness World Records. took place on Jan. 19 across North If Guinness accepts the America. JFNA, OneTable, the measurements, the challah would Orthodox Union, and 250 other break — by several feet — the partner organizations helped Jews The 35-foot-long challah was baked in a tunnel oven at David's Cookies in New Jersey. It was then loaded onto a wooden plank and current record set by Grandma organize and host thousands of transported to the Upper West Side where it was unveiled at a day school's Shabbat assembly. ( JFNA/Vladimir Kolesnikov) Moses Bakery and the Jewish Shabbat dinners. National Fund chapter in New South Wales, Australia. “We came up with the idea of doing the Shabbat of “They said, ‘Let’s do it,’” she says. “Without the OU, -The New York-based groups also baked a backup Love to uplift people and to communicate the idea that we wouldn’t have been able to do it, because they knew challah that turned out even longer than the challah you’re loved for who you are and you’re loved for being who to call right away.” that was unveiled on Jan. 19 — Eisenman says it meaJewish, as opposed to a lot of the messages that I think That call was to Strauss Bakery, a kosher bakery in people are absorbing right now from social media,” says Borough Park, Brooklyn, who pitched in by creating the sured roughly 35 feet, 11 inches but, as it happens, was Sarah Eisenman, the chief officer of community and dough. Said dough weighed in at more than 200 pounds Jewish life at JFNA, who spearheaded the initiative alongand was mixed and braided at the bakery on Thursday night, Jan. 18. side the challah-baking effort. Braiding a 35-foot challah is one thing; baking As for the challah, “I was thinking about what we it is another story. The unbaked challah was then could do that was a record-breaking, feel-good, prideful loaded onto an 18-wheeler truck and driven across thing,” Eisenman says. She had thought about trying to state lines to a kosher commercial kitchen in New break a record for the world’s largest Shabbat dinner but Jersey operated by David’s Cookies, which has a realized that the challah would be less complicated and 40-foot long tunnel oven — one of the only places in the tri-state area that can fit a challah of that size, according to Eisenman. Once the challah was baked Thursday night, it was loaded back on the truck and transported to Congregation Rodeph Sholom, where Eisenman’s children go to school. There, a crowd of dozens of volunteers showed up to help too long to fit on the wooden planks that transported unload the oversized challah. Some spontaneously broke it from the bakery to the truck. The back-up challah out into song, singing Am Yisrael Chai (The People of Israel remained in New Jersey, where it was cut up into a Live) as they maneuvered the challah into the building. dozen three-foot long chunks and donated to all the Come Friday morning, the challah was finally Moishe Houses in New York City, where the communal revealed at an all-school Shabbat assembly for Rodeph residences, designed for Jewish 20-somethings, were Sholom Day School students and their families. Also hosting their own Shabbat of Love dinners.

Food & Romance FIR S T PER SON

Challenges to charity: Alene and Ron Kaufman give with TJF Alene Jo Kaufman arriage has its ups and downs, challenges and stability, joy and sadness, romantic moments, and “just everyday” happenings. We often simply react and respond to what is happe-

Ron and Alene Jo Kaufman at their wedding.

ning around us. Sometimes, however, we are intentional – when we purposely start a process. Planning for the future – when we are alive and when we are not – certainly counts as one of those intentional times. My husband, Ron, and I are celebrating our 49th anniversary this month. A few years ago, we worked with an attorney and financial advisor to draft the documents we would need for the upcoming years. It was an emotional and meaningful experience. Looking back, we acknowledged those early days in our marriage during the unemployment crisis of the 70s – the situation that impacted our move to Virginia. We reminisced about the arrival

of our children and grandchildren and thought about the joy and celebrations of our family’s life. It was a time for warm fuzzies when we reflected on where we are today and how we got here when we appreciated how lucky we are. It was an intentional and intense experience as we looked at the values we each brought into our marriage and how those moral and ethical principles shaped and impacted the decisions we made in our lives as individuals and as a married couple. Ron and I feel very lucky to have ended up in this community. We have great friends and belong to a warm and welcoming synagogue (KBH), our spiritual home for almost 40 years. Ron and I held careers and engaged in volunteer opportunities that challenged and changed us. Our children were educated at Hebrew Academy of Tidewater, my professional home for 36 years, and loved growing up in this supportive Jewish community. The Jewish agencies were there when we needed them - HAT educated our sons; Jewish Family Service was at the ready when we needed estate to them for their futures. However, emotional support; UJFT provided partial the organizations that helped us grow and funding when our sons went on their USY trips to Israel. We are so grateful, and we wanted to find a way to show our gratitude. Our children (and grandchildren), indeed, are the jewels in our crown. At some point, we will no longer be here and have planned Alene and Ron Kaufman in Richmond at Date with the State 2023, on their anniversary. to leave most of our

develop have futures, too. By working with our financial advisor and the professionals at the Tidewater Jewish Foundation, we will be able to ensure that the institutions and agencies who played meaningful roles in our lives will continue to do the same for others. Not only is it our way of saying thank you, but it is a way to show our heirs and our community how much we treasure our Jewish life in Tidewater. I encourage others to do the same. ––––––––––––––––––––––––– For more information about Tidewater Jewish Foundation, contact Naomi Limor Sedek, president and CEO, at nsedek@tjfva.org or 757-965-6109.

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