Tucson Weekly 05/17/2012

MAY 17–23, 2012 WWW.TUCSONWEEKLY.COM • FREE

MAY 17-23, 2012 VOL. 29, NO. 13

OPINION Tom Danehy 4 Ryn Gargulinski 6 Jim Hightower 6 Sacha Baron Cohen has too much talent to be making the same movie over and over again.

33

Endorsement 8 Mailbag 8

CURRENTS The Skinny 9

By Jim Nintzel

Stop Watch 9

By Tim Vanderpool

Upstanding undocumented immigrants test an overburdened system and tenuous reform efforts Media Watch 10

By John Schuster

Fun With the Freeway 11

By Brian J. Pedersen

The latest Interstate 10 project near Prince Road has created hassles for some—and amusement for others Weekly Wide Web 12 Compiled by Dan Gibson

Planning on using this big bag of euros to buy a lot of stock in JP Morgan.

Police Dispatch 12

By Anna Mirocha

Specific Help Wanted 13

By Mari Herreras

The Tucson High principal search gets a do-over—and some insiders don’t buy the district’s explanation

Achoo!

Can we talk about allergies for a moment?

What in the $%@& is in the air that is causing me to sneeze approximately every 7.2 seconds? Good god. For the last three weeks, my nose has been irritated and gross and a generally unpleasant place to have attached to my face.

Last week, when it was really windy and we had that haboob-lite thing that roared through town, my nose was so itchy that I was this close to grabbing one of those dishwashing-brush things and going to town. Yeah, it would have caused lasting and embarrassing damage, but for a brief shining moment, it would have felt soooo good.

And then last weekend, I got a case of what was either food poisoning or the stomach flu; whatever it was, it was bad enough that I lost seven pounds in two days. I was such a wreck that I was too tired to look at a computer screen, and was afraid to get more than 10 steps away from a bathroom.

My entire body basically shut down for a day and a half … that is, my entire body except for the parts that suffer from allergies. You know how god-awful it is to have a sneezing fit when you’re otherwise barely able to move, and at the same time, you’re trying to avoid a horrifying eruption out of one or more orifices? It’s really freaking god-awful.

Anyway, this whole Editor’s Note is my way of telling my fellow Southern Arizona allergy-sufferers out there that I feel your pain. Oh, and stay away from those dish-washing brushes. They’re trouble.

One of the most conservative sessions in the Arizona Legislature’s history is in the books

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CHOW

City Week 18 Our picks for the week

Mediocre Meat 37

TQ&A 20 Patrick McArdle, Digital Downtown Darkroom

PERFORMING ARTS Brand-New Works 25

By Sherilyn Forrester

Two Tucsonans will debut plays thanks to the Arizona Women’s Theatre Company

VISUAL ARTS Eclectic Gathering 27

By Margaret Regan

The Mujeres show succeeds at reflecting on women’s lives

BOOKS Beyond Books 31

By Margaret Regan

Noshing Around 37

By Adam Borowitz

MUSIC Wonderful Bubble 43

By Eric Swedlund

Plants and Animals lowered the pressure to record their third full-length album Soundbites 43

By Stephen Seigel

Club Listings 46 Nine Questions 49 Live 50

Cosmos Deconstructed 32

Speak Up! 55

By Paul Wine

A UA astronomer takes readers on a journey starting at the beginning of time

CINEMA Been There, Done That 33

By Colin Boyd

The Dictator covers too much familiar ground Film Times 34

A great look can’t revive the dull Dark Shadows script Now Showing at Home 36

COVER DESIGN BY ANDREW ARTHUR

Except for friendly service, the Vail Steak House was a complete disappointment

Rhythm & Views 52

By Bob Grimm

JIMMY BOEGLE, Editor jboegle@tucsonweekly.com

By Jacqueline Kuder

A three-day symposium will turn poetry into action

Corpse of a Film 35

Right-Wing Rule 14

By Jim Nintzel

CULTURE

MEDICAL MJ

By J.M. Smith

A May 25 hearing will help decide whether afflictions are added to the state’s MMJ qualifying-conditions list

CLASSIFIEDS Comix 56-57 Free Will Astrology 56 ¡Ask a Mexican! 57 Savage Love 58 Personals 60 Employment 61 News of the Weird 62 Real Estate 62 Rentals 62 Mind, Body and Spirit 63 Crossword 63 *Adult Content 58-60

DANEHY OPINION

Tom ponders TV news, credit derivatives and Canadian cash

WWW.TUCSONWEEKLY.COM P. O. BOX 27087, TUCSON, AZ 85726 (520) 294-1200

Thomas P. Lee Publisher

BY TOM DANEHY, tdanehy@tucsonweekly.com

EDITORIAL Jimmy Boegle Editor Jim Nintzel Senior Writer Irene Messina Assistant Editor Mari Herreras Staff Writer Linda Ray City Week Listings Dan Gibson Web Producer Margaret Regan Arts Editor Stephen Seigel Music Editor Bill Clemens Copy Editor Tom Danehy, Renée Downing, Ryn Gargulinski, Randy Serraglio, J.M. Smith Columnists Colin Boyd, Bob Grimm Cinema Writers Adam Borowitz, Rita Connelly, Jacqueline Kuder Chow Writers Sherilyn Forrester, Laura C.J. Owen Theater Writers Hope Davis, Serena Valdez Editorial Interns Contributors Jacquie Allen, Gustavo Arellano, Gene Armstrong, Rob Brezsny, Max Cannon, Rand Carlson, Michael Grimm, Matt Groening, Keith Hickman-Perfetti, Jim Hightower, Jarret Keene, David Kish, Jim Lipson, Mel Mason, David Mendez, Anna Mirocha, Andy Mosier, Brian J. Pedersen, Dan Perkins, Ted Rall, Dan Savage, John Schuster, Chuck Shepherd, Gary Smathers, Eric Swedlund, Tim Vanderpool, Paul Wine SALES AND BUSINESS Jill A’Hearn Advertising Director Monica Akyol Inside Sales Manager Laura Bohling, Michele LeCoumpte, Alan Schultz, David White Account Executives Jim Keyes Digital Sales Manager Beth Brouillette Business Manager Robin Taheri Business Office Natasha Marble, Stephen Myers Inside Sales Representatives NATIONAL ADVERTISING: The Ruxton Group (888)-2Ruxton New York (212) 477-8781, Chicago (312) 828-0564, Phoenix (602) 238-4800, San Francisco, (415) 659-5545 PRODUCTION & CIRCULATION Andrew Arthur Art Director Laura Horvath Circulation Manager Duane Hollis Editorial Layout Kristen Beumeler, Kyle Bogan, Shari Chase, Josh Farris, Anne Koglin, Adam Kurtz, Matthew Langenheim, Daniel Singleton, Denise Utter, Greg Willhite, Yaron Yarden Production Staff

Tucson Weekly® (ISSN 0742-0692) is published every Thursday by Wick Communications at 3280 E. Hemisphere Loop,Tucson, Arizona. Address all editorial, business and production correspondence to: Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087,Tucson, Arizona 85726. Phone: (520) 294-1200, FAX (520) 792-2096. First Class subscriptions, mailed in an envelope, cost $112 yearly/53 issues. Sorry, no refunds on subscriptions. Member of the Association of Alternative Newsmedia (AAN).The Tucson Weekly® and Best of Tucson® are registered trademarks of Wick Communications.

Back issues of the Tucson Weekly are available for $1 each plus postage for the current year. Back issues from any previous year are $3 plus postage. Back issues of the Best of Tucson® are $5.

Distribution: The Tucson Weekly is available free of charge in Pima County, limited to one copy per reader. Additional copies of the current issue of the Tucson Weekly may be purchased for $1, payable at the Tucson Weekly office in advance. Outside Pima County, the single-copy cost of Tucson Weekly is $1. Tucson Weekly may be distributed only by the Tucson Weekly’s authorized independent contractors or Tucson Weekly’s authorized distributors. No person may, without prior written permission of the Tucson Weekly, take more than one copy of each week’s Tucson Weekly issue.

Copyright: The entire contents of Tucson Weekly are Copyright © 2012 by Wick Communications.

No portion may be reproduced in whole or part by any means without the express written permission of the Publisher, Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726.

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A

few things worth mentioning: • Am I the only one who is dismayed by local TV-news people calling in “body-language experts” to try to discern whether there’s something fishy about the way the parents of missing 6-year-old Isabel Celis are acting? You’ve got people going over the footage of press conferences, freezing frames and saying, “Oh, look, her eyes went up 22 degrees above horizontal.

That means something.” Yeah, maybe a fly buzzing around in the lights caught her attention, or maybe she was stifling a sneeze. Or maybe it does mean something sinister, but what, exactly? I just find this desperate attempt to find an “angle” unseemly and unprofessional.

I remember when the father of basketball legend Michael Jordan was killed. Media outlets stumbled over themselves to be the first to get “the story.” There were hurriedly puttogether stories about how the murder might have been connected to Michael Jordan’s well-known gambling habit.

Maybe the star had failed to pay a lost wager, or maybe he had gambled with the wrong people. Another story questioned whether it might have been racially motivated.

As it turned out, James Jordan Sr. was returning from a funeral when he pulled his brand-new Lexus into a rest stop on Interstate 95 to take a nap. Two knuckleheads— one white, one black—came upon the shiny new car, shot Jordan to death while he slept, and stole the vehicle. Pretty much Knucklehead 101. Then they stole a couple of NBA championship rings from the car and used James Jordan’s cell phone to call people, which is how they got caught so easily. Advanced Knucklehead.

Oh, and the white guy was wearing a Michael Jordan T-shirt when he got arrested.

I know it’s sometimes boring and mundane to just report the news—plus, it’s sweeps month, and everybody wants to move up to the No. 69 media market. (Tucson is No. 70.)

But, gee whiz, people, show a little decorum.

• I actually looked up that media-market thing. Our homies at Inside Tucson Business ran a piece on how Tucson’s TV market actually shrank. I don’t see how that’s possible.

I’ve been in Best Buy on the day after Thanksgiving.

Tucson had been as high as No. 66 in the country and was at 67 before the latest adjustment. Somehow, Tucson lost 4.2 percent of its TV households from the previous year. Phoenix lost 3.7 percent to drop from No. 12 to No. 13. Of the top 20 markets, only Houston, Miami and Orlando gained TV households.

The most amazing thing is that more than two-thirds of the

RANDOM SHOTS By Rand Carlson

U.S. TV markets (141 of 210) lost TV households. You don’t think that those VW buses with the “Kill Your Television” bumper stickers are actually having an impact, do you?

• Note to all those Republicans (Jesse Kelly) and other misfits who think that the problem with corporate America and the banking industry is too much regulation: JPMorgan Chase lost 2 BILLION DOLLARS in a very short period of time due to bad bets on credit derivatives (which should not be regulated, but should be outlawed altogether). Not only that, but the $2 billion in losses could be traced to one guy whose sole job is to hedge bets to make sure the bank doesn’t lose too much money on any one deal.

Here’s what the bank said in its press release: The chief investment office “has had significant mark-to-market losses in its synthetic credit portfolio, and this portfolio has proven to be riskier, more volatile and less effective as an economic hedge than the firm previously believed.”

Synthetic credit portfolio?! That sounds like a flesheating disease, which, in a way, it is.

You know how you should never buy a hamburger at a pizza place? Why can’t banks just be happy doing bank stuff?

Making loans, overcharging for checking accounts, … you know, crap like that. Why do they feel the need to make huge bets on things that don’t even exist? Maybe if a few bankers went to prison, the ones who follow in their tiny footsteps would think twice before rolling the dice on an arcane mathematical formula that no one understands.

• Finally, did you see the thing about the new Canadian $20 bill? They’re using a polymer note with a variety of images to help prevent counterfeiting and extend the life of the bills. They commissioned a study to check on Canadians’ responses to the new bills—and got quite an earful.

On the front of the bill is a picture of the Canadian National Vimy Memorial, which is in France and commemorates the 1917 Battle of Vimy Ridge in World War I. Unfortunately, the majority of Canadians who looked at the bills mistook the memorial for the twin towers of the World Trade Center. Plus, there are Grecian statues of nude women representing truth, justice, charity, knowledge and peace—statues that most of the swingin’ Canadians found to be “pornographic.”

This isn’t the first time this has happened. Members of focus groups saw a skull and crossbones and Pinocchio on the new Canadian $50 bill. And on the new $100 bill, some people mistook the double-helix DNA strand for a “sex toy” or the Big Dipper, which might just be redundant.

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GARGULINSKI OPINION

With proper planning, camping in Arizona can be paradise on Earth HIGHTOWER

BY JIM HIGHTOWER

ANOTHER KOCH-FUNDED STEALTH CAMPAIGN

BY RYN GARGULINSKI, rgargulinski@tucsonweekly.com

P

aradise comes from happy hounds, good pizza and camping in Arizona—not necessarily all at once.

The hounds and the camping make a magnificent mix, but you’d be hard-pressed to get the crust of a DiGiorno frozen pizza to properly rise on a campsite grill. And to make sure the hounds-and-camping mix stays more like paradise than hell, make sure your planning consists of more than simply grabbing a tent and heading for the hills.

You should at least bring some water. Lots of water. It’s amazing how much water it takes to wash your hands, wash your face, brush your teeth, boil rice, hydrate two big dogs and have a sip or two left over for yourself.

Bring plenty of food. This includes dog food. For future reference, please note that the only dog food for sale anywhere near Roosevelt Lake consisted of three cans (count them) at the marina, or your choice of Old Roy or Purina several miles from the campsite.

Other amenities depend on how much or how little you feel like truly roughing it. Those who want the really rough can go as far as forgetting about luxury items, such as toilet paper. Those who like a bit of comfort in their lives will want to include fluffy sleeping bags, air mattresses and pillows—and dog treats to lure the dogs off the air mattresses and pillows.

Millions of children in our public schools will soon be hearing from the Heartland Institute. It might sound like a nice, aboveboard civic group promoting such salt-ofthe-earth virtues as integrity and veracity— but it’s quite the opposite.

Heartland’s mission is to promote mass ignorance on behalf of its self-serving (and often heartless) corporate backers. It is yet another secretive far-right-wing front group funded by the Koch brothers’ club of billionaires who are intent on establishing an unbridled corporate plutocracy in our country.

But this outfit was recently outed by someone who released a trove of its internal documents—including details of its multi-million-dollar stealth campaign to Comfort items are especially important, so that you don’t undermine the teaching of climate-change end up being cranky, which can lead to becoming rude and science in America’s schools. Heartland obnoxious and starting fights with your significant other. is creating an anti-science curriculum Crankiness can also result in a devil-may-care attitude that to pooh-pooh the facts of global weather makes you forget the rules of camping etiquette. There are change and planning to turn the issue into several. a major culture war in local school districts Stealing the portable chairs someone left by the lake is across the country. Falsely claiming that a no-no, as is blasting AC/DC in the middle of the night. “principals and teachers are heavily biased Riding your bicycle into other people’s campsites with a toward the alarmist perspective,” and that large golden retriever in tow is typically frowned upon. climate change “is a major scientific conThis counts double if your only apparent purpose is to tell troversy,” the institute and its right-wing allies are already pressuring school boards to adopt its THIS MODERN WORLD By Tom Tomorrow denial curriculum, forcing teachers to water down the science.

The dishonesty of Heartland’s campaign includes its shielding of the special interests behind it. When the campaign comes to your area, it won’t tell local people that the Koch brothers— who own America’s largest private oil corporation and are vituperative opponents of regulations to restrict their emissions of globalwarming pollutants—are putting in up to $200,000 for the effort this year.

To get to the dark heart of this insidious campaign, and to stand for science and truth in teaching, go to the National Center for Science Education at www.ncse.com.

6 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

those campers that their garbage is going to “blow to hell and back” unless they take some of the garbage bags you are offering.

Bring garbage bags.

The biggest etiquette breach of all, however, comes from those god-awful noisemakers called generators. These beastly items are for the truly clueless, who think camping means driving a 90-foot RV to an out-of-town site where you can shut the curtains, crank up the air conditioning and sit in comfort while you drink beer and watch baseball.

While all of that is fine and dandy—for a sports bar—it kind of kills the point of camping. It disturbs other campers who would have surely hurled rocks at the generator, the RV or the people inside had it not been a night with a blazing super moon.

Generators are not the only dangers you should be aware of while camping in Arizona. Rattlesnakes are going to be part of the scene, and just like bicycling man with the golden retriever, they will slither into your space uninvited.

Bring a shovel.

Shovels can be used to smash rattlesnake skulls, scoop dirt to extinguish your campfire and help set up your little home away from home, otherwise known as your campsite. Setting up your site is an art in itself, with a number of rituals that can help ensure you have a safe and comfortable stay.

The safety comes through clearing your site of rocks, large sticks and other debris that can pierce your foot or poke a hole in your air mattress. Your dog’s paws will thank you for clearing out the wayward burrs.

Setting the tent on a plastic tarp aids in safety by further fortifying the bottom of the tent. If you leave enough plastic sticking out by the tent doors, legend says the plastic will deter those mean ol’ rattlesnakes. True or not, the measure does help you sleep better.

You’ll also sleep better if you bring your feng shui kit to cleanse the campsite upon your arrival. A Tibetan singing bowl works wonders for clearing out foul energy, evil spirits and the residue of bad karma left in the tent from your beau’s ex-wife. That stuff can be nastier than a mean ol’ rattlesnake any day.

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MAILBAG

ENDORSEMENT

Send letters to P. O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726. Or e-mail to mailbag@tucsonweekly. com. Letters must include name, address and daytime phone number. Letters must include signature. We reserve the right to edit letters.

Please limit letters to 250 words.

two tickets instead of $50, it should say so upfront. It’s pure deception to say the ticket prices are $25 each.

Finally, Someone Is Willing to Claim Daniel Patterson

CBD: Border Patrol Agents, Not Smugglers, Cause Illegal Roads in Cabeza Prieta

We are all free to change our party registrations as we please, and self-identified “lifelong Democrat” Nicholas Fontana was certainly a registered independent as long as Daniel Patterson was (TQ&A, May 3).

But Fontana fudges in claiming that, like himself, Patterson switched his registration “from lifelong Democrat” to independent.

Lifelong? Patterson was neither a Democrat, nor Republican, when he ran for the Legislature back in 2000. If “lifelong” registrations determined such matters—and they don’t—then a Green Party member would be sitting in the Legislature today.

Claudia Ellquist

If We Don’t Support Fourth Avenue, Businesses Will Die Today, I visited one of the shops along Fourth Avenue. When I asked the owner how the construction was affecting her business, she broke down and started crying, saying that things were so bad, she wasn’t able to talk about it (“Go Downtown, Dammit,” Editor’s Note, April 19). This has been a family business for more than 20 years, and she says there is no way she will be able to survive.

I am afraid that we are going to lose a lot of the unique, locally owned businesses along Fourth Avenue and Congress Street before the end of the streetcar construction. The triple whammy of the extended economic downturn, the normal summer downturn and the devastating impact of the streetcar construction is much more than these shops are going to be able to ride out. National chains have the option of offsetting losses at one store against profits at others, but for the owners of most of the businesses along the route of the streetcar, this isn’t an option.

It may not be too late to help some of these stores if people will make an effort to come down and patronize them, but without a real show of support, when the first streetcar rolls down the tracks, there are going to be a lot of empty storefronts along the way.

Frank Bohac

The Fox’s Extra Fees Are Pure Deception Jimmy Boegle rightfully questioned the ethics of a hotel that adds a “resort fee” (in the fine print) to its posted room cost (“Local Means Responsibility,” Editor’s Note, May 3).

I had a similar experience with the Fox Tucson Theatre. I was buying two $25 tickets online to an upcoming show. After choosing my seats, I went to checkout. Turns out there is also a $4-per-ticket “convenience fee,” plus a $5.50 total “processing fee.”

Hey, if the Fox needs to charge $63.50 for 8 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

Peter Bourque

A recent article by Leo W. Banks (“Losing the Drug War,” May 3) included an undated photo of illegal roads in the Cabeza Prieta National Wildlife Refuge. The photo caption indicates these roads are created by drugsmugglers and implies that drug-smugglers are destroying the refuge.

Those tracks were not created by drugsmugglers, but rather by our very own U.S. Customs and Border Patrol. This fact is documented in a 2011 report by refuge staff in a report titled “Vehicle Trails Associated With Illegal Border Activities on Cabeza Prieta National Wildlife Refuge—July 2011.” On Page 4 of that report, we learn: “(S)muggling activities have continued to occur as groups of UDAs and drug-smugglers have resorted to walking through the refuge” since the installation of the vehicle barrier and forward operating base in 2003.

Disturbingly, Mr. Banks didn’t take that photo, but he takes credit for it.

I hope Mr. Banks is as concerned about the destruction of public lands by border activities as I am. But I’m deeply disappointed in Mr. Banks, and the Tucson Weekly, for printing an article that has an improperly captioned and credited photo that misleads the public and fails to address the largest threat to our public lands near the border—the Border Patrol.

The report I mention is available at azwild. org/action/CabezaPrieta_2011July.pdf.

Cyndi Tuell Southwest conservation advocate, Center for Biological Diversity

Corrections As mentioned in the letter above, the photo of vehicle tracks in the Cabeza Prieta National Wildlife Refuge that accompanied “Losing the Drug War” (May 3) was mistakenly credited to Banks due to a production-department error. The caption accompanying it should have said that although drug-smugglers cause vehicle erosion in the Cabeza, the majority is caused by the Border Patrol, according to the aforementioned report.

Additionally, due to an error by the writer, the caption for a photo of drug-smugglers said the picture was taken by a hidden camera in the San Bernardino Wildlife Refuge near Douglas. Actually, the picture was taken by an employee of the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service about 4 1/2 miles north of the border, and 8 miles from the refuge. The smugglers had been apprehended and were being led away.

Finally, in Soundbites (May 10), the photo captioned “Faster Than Light” actually shows Young Mothers.

We apologize for the mistakes.

OPINION

Voters should pick trusted public servant Ron Barber to complete Gabrielle Giffords’ term

BY THE TUCSON WEEKLY EDITORIAL BOARD, mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

T

here’s a reason that Republicans who have worked with Democrat Ron Barber are stepping across party lines to support him.

It’s because those Republicans—former Tucson Mayor Bob Walkup, Tucson City Councilman Steve Kozachik, homebuilder John Wesley Miller, former state lawmaker Pete Hershberger, former SAHBA lobbyist Alex Jacome, former president of the 162nd Fighter Wing Minuteman Committee Tim Amalong, and many others—have worked with Barber in the past. So they know from personal experience that he’s the kind of guy who will work with other people to make Southern Arizona a better place, regardless of political ideology.

And that’s why we’re urging you to vote for Ron Barber in the June 12 special election to complete Gabrielle Giffords’ congressional term.

Barber has deep roots in Southern Arizona. He has lived here since the 1960s, graduating from Rincon High School. He raised his family here. He built a career as head of the Southern Arizona branch of the state’s Division of Developmental Disabilities, learning how to use the levers of government to help the most vulnerable in our community. He also successfully moved people out of state-run institutions and into the community, where they could live better lives.

With his wife, Nancy, he ran Toy Traders/ Stork’s Nest for more than two decades and learned about the challenges facing small businesses.

In 2006, Barber was inspired to leave his job with the state to help Giffords get elected to the U.S. House of Representatives.

After she won that race, he headed her Southern Arizona office.

In that role, Barber gained the experience that would make him an excellent congressman. He helped build a staff that, by all accounts, reached across all sectors of the community to serve the people of Southern Arizona.

On Jan. 8, 2011, he was among those who were victims of a madman’s rampage. But even after taking two bullets and nearly losing his life, Barber demonstrated his resilience. His first inclination was to find a way to make some good come out of a terrible event. As he recovered in the intensive care unit, he came up with the idea to find a way to raise money to help kids who are bullied, and young people who suffer from mental illness.

Barber created the nonprofit Fund for Civility, Respect and Understanding. Just about two months after the shootings, he brought an array of rock stars to Tucson for a fundraising concert—and ended up onstage himself, alongside his family, to sing “Teach Your Children” with the likes

of Jackson Browne, Alice Cooper, David Crosby and Graham Nash.

Ron Barber has a spine of steel.

Now Barber is stepping up to serve one more time. At the behest of Giffords and her husband, former astronaut Mark Kelly, he’s taking on the challenge of representing Southern Arizona in the U.S. House of Representatives.

Barber’s opponent, Republican Jesse Kelly, is a Tea Party extremist. As we’ve noted in these pages, Kelly will tell voters almost anything to get elected. We won’t rehash it all here, but his radical views on getting rid of the minimum wage and all corporate taxes, eliminating loans for college students, banning abortion even in cases of rape or incest, and shutting down the Environmental Protection Agency are far out of step with Southern Arizona voters. And we’ve given up trying to figure out what his plans are for fixing Social Security and Medicare, since in the last few weeks, he’s gone from insisting the programs must be privatized to swearing he would never allow them to be phased out.

And don’t even get us started on his fantasies about how the United States has more oil than Saudi Arabia—an assertion so absurd that one of his fellow GOP primary candidates, Martha McSally, took the brave step of telling him he was dead wrong about that.

Jesse Kelly is full of nonsense—and in the three years we’ve seen him on the campaign trail, he’s done nothing to persuade us that he cares one whit about helping people in Southern Arizona.

It’s little wonder that Daniel Scarpinato, the National Republican Congressional Committee spokesman who is now running an expensive negative campaign against Barber, said that in 2010, Kelly ran “one of the most negative, slanderous campaigns that we’ve seen in Arizona probably in decades.”

Southern Arizona voters have a stark choice in front of them. For us, it’s an easy choice to make.

Vote for Ron Barber for Congress.

CURRENTS

THE SKINNY

Upstanding undocumented immigrants test an overburdened system and tenuous ous reform efforts

Stop Watch

SENIORS’ DAY Sandra Moreno and her children.

BY TIM VANDERPOOL, tvanderpool@tucsonweekly.com ly.com here’s no need to dig up old Twilight Zone episodes to glimpse a parallel universe. You can find one right here in Tucson, with a short visit to folks like Sandra Moreno. The warm, well-regarded single mom has three kids to look after—and the federal government is breathing down her neck.

In a crowd, Sandra would blend in with the rest of us. But like thousands of other undocumented Tucsonans, she dwells in a universe of shadows and suspicion, always waiting for the other shoe to drop. And on Feb. 5, 2010, it did.

That’s the day she was stopped for a minor traffic violation and, along with her kids and estranged husband, spent the night behind bars courtesy of the U.S. Border Patrol. Every day since, she and her family have lived in legal limbo, awaiting the next move by U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement, the Border Patrol’s sister agency within the Department of Homeland Security. Better known as ICE, its mission includes removing undocumented immigrants from this country.

Since it was formed in 2003, ICE has been feared and loathed among the immigrant community for its high-profile raids and aggressive deportation tactics, which have appeared to target criminal aliens and run-of-the-mill undocumented folks equally.

Or so it appeared until last fall, when Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano announced a policy shift that included reviewing the cases of some 300,000 undocumented aliens in the throes of deportation proceedings. The goal, Napolitano said, was deciding which of those could be referred to low-priority status and possibly have their cases closed. This new approach, called “prosecutorial discretion,” was aimed at freeing clogged immigration courts, making room for the speedier removal of criminal aliens stuck in our prisons on the taxpayers’ dime.

The details were outlined in a June 2011 memo from ICE Director John Morton to his field directors, supervisors and lawyers. “Because the agency is confronted with more administrative violations than its resources can address,” Morton wrote, “the agency must regularly exercise ‘prosecutorial discretion’ if it is to prioritize its efforts.”

He went on to describe such discretion as “the authority of an agency charged with enforcing a law to decide to what degree to enforce the law against any particular individual.”

At least initially, people who had come to the United States illegally but were otherwise upstanding community members—those who had been here for many years; those with family here or an American-born child; or those with a good shot at gaining legal status—started seeing their cases “administratively closed,” meaning that

TIM VANDERPOOL

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ICE wasn’t actively seeking their deportation.

Meanwhile, a local group that included longtime immigration attorney Margo Cowan created information packets for immigrants, providing them with guidelines based on the Morton memo.

In December, the team filed 65 requests for favorable prosecutorial discretion. “It seemed that in the beginning, we were getting fair responses,” Cowan says. “Most of them were being approved, and we got some of those cases closed.”

But by February, Cowan says, that progress “had come to a screeching halt. And people who were in the exact same position as the cases that had already been administratively closed started receiving denials. It just didn’t make any sense to us.”

Among those denied prosecutorial discretion were Sandra Moreno and two of her children— despite the fact that her third and youngest daughter was born in the United States, and that she presented dozens of letters vouching for her fine character and volunteerism.

Cowan says she plans to highlight the cases of Moreno and others who have been shunted aside, even though they precisely fit the discretionary guidelines laid out by Morton. “These people are workers; they pay taxes; they don’t have criminal histories; they all have kids who are U.S. citizens. One is a marriage counselor in his church; another is a music director in his church. These are all stand-up people.”

What’s happening to them “is really not consistent with the Morton memo,” Cowan says, blaming recalcitrant ICE prosecutors for the logjam. “The career folks in the Department of Homeland Security are really committed to ridding our country of the ‘brown plague’ like Sandra and her kids. That’s the culture, and I’m thinking this directive from the president is just too tough for them to swallow. So they’re exercising discretion in a very narrow way.”

At the same time, ICE is being pigeonholed by get-tough conservatives in Congress, such as Rep. Robert Aderholt, an Alabama Republican who chairs the House Subcommittee on Homeland Security. In March, Aderholt excoriated the notion of prosecutorial discretion as a money-

saving device, noting that his subcommittee has supported every ICE funding request since the agency was created, including allocations last year for 34,000 additional detention beds.

“Hiding behind the excuse of limited resources,” Aderholt told the subcommittee, “the current administration has sought to diminish and degrade ICE’s immigration-enforcement mission through the use of prosecutorial discretion.”

An ICE official was not made available for comment before press time. However, the agency did provide the Weekly with statistics showing, for instance, that of the nearly 220,000 deportation cases reviewed, 16,554, or 7.5 percent, have been flagged as appropriate for prosecutorial discretion. Of those, 2,722 cases have been administratively closed. ICE says it has also granted more than 1,300 stays and deferred actions so far this year, exceeding similar actions for all of 2011.

In a statement, the agency claims to have “dramatically changed the way it conducts immigration enforcement. ICE implemented clear priorities, and enhanced the use of prosecutorial discretion, eliminating the ad hoc approach of the past.”

But that doesn’t explain the plight of Sandra Moreno and others like her—people with no criminal background who have overwhelming community support and deep roots in this country.

To Moreno, it’s heartbreaking. She says that in Mexico, it’s nearly impossible for a single mother to support a family. During nine years in the United States, she has provided day care for children, cooked chorizo to sell, and otherwise worked to keep her kids fed. Now she’s starting a massage-therapy business.

And still, in her parallel universe, she must always be checking her rearview mirror and closing the blinds.

“For me, the United States is my home,” Moreno says. “We are a good family. And I’m sure if the United States gives us an opportunity to stay here, we can help society. It is our fault that we stayed here without proper permits. But if we went back to Mexico, I don’t know how I’d feed my kids.”

Ballots are going out on Thursday, May 17, in the special election between Democrat Ron Barber and Republican Jesse Kelly to complete Gabrielle Giffords’ congressional term.

Here’s what we’re hearing from those who are whispering about the race: Internal polls show both candidates are within a few points of each other—and within the polls’ margin of error. Somewhere between 10 to 20 percent of the RON electorate is undecided.

In other words: It’s a pure toss-up at this point.

If all of the advertising we’ve been seeing on our TV screens is any indication, both Barber and Kelly are focusing on capturing the hearts and minds of the seniors in Congressional District 8.

Last week, Barber won the GABRIELLE endorsement of the National Committee to Preserve Social Security and Medicare, an advocacy group that opposes the privatization of Social Security and the transformation of Medicare into a voucher program.

Phillip Rotondi, a senior political adviser for the group, said that Barber would “take to Washington exactly the kind of common-sense leadership we need in the House of Representatives as Congress addresses programs that are essential for seniors and their families. … He is on record and committed fully to fight the tough fight for Arizona residents and all of us nationwide.”

At a gathering of about 100 seniors and campaign volunteers at the Lighthouse/City YMCA on Monday, May 7, Barber reiterated his support for Medicare and Social Security.

“A big part of why I’m running for office is to make sure that people remain part of the middle class, especially those who rely so much on Social Security and Medicare,” Barber said.

“Unfortunately, my opponent has a very different view. Jesse Kelly would put the rich first and leave the middle class and seniors last. We will not let that happen.”

Medicare and Social Security have become the big issues in the CD 8 race, partially because Kelly has so often said that both programs should be privatized. Kelly backed off both of those positions earlier this month, declaring on his website: “I do not support privatizing, eliminating or phasing out these programs in any way.”

But Kelly appears to have trouble keeping his story straight. By last week, he was back to telling the Arizona Daily Star that he did support the privatization of Social Security for younger workers, which sounds like “phasing out” to us.

Kelly’s continuing evolution in his positions on Social Security and Medicare led Barber to joke last week that his opponent was “undergoing an extreme makeover.”

Kelly received an endorsement of his own last week, from the 60 Plus Association, an advocacy group that

CONTINUED ON PAGE 11 MAY 17 – 23, 2012

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A program with Tucson connections could have global implications for reporters in all facets of their career paths.

Reporting Unlimited, the brainchild of UA professor and international correspondent Mort Rosenblum, is off and running, with a focus on providing a platform to help journalists in a variety of career steps. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The idea for Reporting Unlimited was to create an international reporting center,â&#x20AC;? said John de Dios, Reporting Unlimitedâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s socialmedia coordinator (and a Tucson Weekly contributor). â&#x20AC;&#x153;The goal is to foster a conversation and dialogue about news, and how everything ties together on a global scale.â&#x20AC;?

As uncertainty prevails within the traditional journalism model, Reporting Unlimited is attempting to act as a portal for information that can be beneficial on a number of levels. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We are not a large organization,â&#x20AC;? de Dios said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re on a more-personal level, where dialogue can be had. We encourage contributors to talk about whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going onâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;be it local, national, whatever. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a big deal to be involved, and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s important to stay in contact.â&#x20AC;?

Reporting Unlimited is also focusing on different tiers of advice based upon the level of knowledge of the journalists who participate. While much of the information is discussed through forums online, RU plans to host workshops in Tucson as well. They started with a pilot workshop in March. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We had three different categories (at the workshop): professionals, grad students and undergrads,â&#x20AC;? de Dios said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I think it was pretty successful, because we got an idea of what grads and undergrads get out of workshops, and what professionals want to get out of it as well. We want to help give them training since a lot of them have been laid off and are trying to get back in. Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re interested in skills-type stuff. The undergraduates want to know how to get to the story. The graduates want to know how to deal with the story once they get thereâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;how do they market it? How do they get paid for it? If you do it right, you can still get paid if you go after it.â&#x20AC;?

Reporting Unlimitedâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s reach goes well beyond Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;Rosenblum spends much of his time in Franceâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;which makes an online platform a logical centralized location. The best way to check on Reporting Unlimitedâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s resources is through the organizationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Facebook page. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We decided to go with Facebook, because Facebook has an incredibly enormous global presence. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a really good place to reach a large audience,â&#x20AC;? said de Dios, who added that the organizationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s activities can also be tracked through Twitter. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It is important to pay attention to everything that goes on around us. Everything is connected, and thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s our goal.â&#x20AC;?

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AZPM REPORTERS RECEIVE ACCOLADES Reporters Gisela Telis and Michel Marizco were recently honored for their work with Arizona Public Media.

Telis, an online editor and reporter at the UA public-broadcasting outlet, received a 2011-2012 Rosalynn Carter Fellowship for Mental Health Journalism. The fellowships focus on mental-health treatment in rural, tribal and underserved communities. Telis received one of six fellowships awarded to American journalists.

Marizco won a National Headliner Award for his piece â&#x20AC;&#x153;Mexican Ghost Towns: The Drug War and Cartels Lead to an Exodus in Northern Mexico.â&#x20AC;? The story garnered the Fronteras reporter second-place in the Feature and Human Interest Story category for broadcast radio networks and syndicators.

LET THE â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;TERMINATORâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; JOKES COMMENCE! If you think science fiction sometimes gets uncomfortably close to the truth, you might have noticed those bus-stop ads for SkyNet and decided that it was a good idea to get off the grid and stock up on robot-resistant ammo.

But you can temper your concerns for the time being. The official story is that SkyNet is part of KVOA Channel 4â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s citywide multicamera platform. â&#x20AC;&#x153;News 4 Tucson SkyNet integrates traffic, weather and safety monitoring with cuttingedge technology that provides 360-degree views from virtually any vantage point in the Tucson metro area,â&#x20AC;? says a press release available at kvoa.com, the stationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s website.

The system is similar to one employed by rival KOLD Channel 13. But the KVOA version features hi-def cameras, which, depending on your point of view, could be a simple technological upgrade, or a way to more closely monitor human activity.

FORMER KIIM DJ MENDIBLES DIES Charlie Mendibles, who for years occupied the overnight shift at KIIM FM 99.5, has died at the age of 63. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Charlie was with us almost 10 years,â&#x20AC;?

KIIM program director Buzz Jackson said in an email. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I remember him as a family guy. He cared very much about his kids and family. He was good on the air, reliable and dependable, and he always had some great stories from his time in Phoenix radio.â&#x20AC;?

Mendibles was laid off a while back as a result of a Citadel downsizing. KIIM was one of the last stations in the market to have an on-air presence 24 hours a day, and Mendibles lost his position when the company changed its strategy and voice-tracked most of the night and overnight shifts.

KGUN FILLS MORNINGNEWS VACANCY KGUN Channel 9 has agreed to terms with Corinne Hautala for the Good Morning Tucson anchor position vacated by Kimberly Romo. Hautala has been filling in for the past few weeks and was formally given the opportunity on Monday, May 14.

Hautala joined KGUN as a reporter last year. A graduate of the Walter Cronkite School of Journalism at Arizona State University, Hautala was a morning anchor at WTLV in Jacksonville, Fla., and also worked in Hastings, Neb., prior to returning to Arizona.

CURRENTS

THE SKINNY CONTINUED

The latest Interstate 10 project near Prince Road has created hassles for some—and amusement for others

from Page 9

Fun With the Freeway

supports the privatization of Medicare and Social Security.

THE CD 8 AIR WAR ESCALATES

BY BRIAN J. PEDERSEN, bpedersen@tucsonweekly.com he view from Ken Pausen and Sylas Marner’s retirement spot is going through a daily metamorphosis. And they couldn’t be happier about it.

The two men are among dozens of people who call the Prince of Tucson RV Park home.

The longstanding park, with a mix of full- and part-time residents, is nestled on the west side of Interstate 10 at Prince Road. It’s mostly a quiet and unassuming place where not much happens. Well, at least it was that way until last fall, when the latest project to widen Interstate 10 got under way.

Instead of having vehicles on the freeway whipping by the east side of their homes, Prince of Tucson residents will soon have motorists on both sides, thanks to the new, extended interchange that spills out behind their community.

Disruptive? Yes. Fun to watch get built?

Definitely, Pausen and Marner said.

“We’ve had a lot of entertainment the last few months,” Pausen said last week, while he and Marner leaned against a chain-link fence separating them from construction that will have Prince Road going over I-10 when work is finished in late 2013.

On this day, workers from Phoenix-based Pulice Construction were installing large, concrete side panels onto a ramp area, with Pausen, Marner and other “resident supervisors,” as they call themselves, watching with rapt attention.

Marner, like many others, has been using a camera to chronicle the work around the park, which is currently split in half by the construc-

tion zone via Ruthrauff Road to the north, and Miracle Mile to the south during peak-use hours on weekdays and Saturdays.

“If we didn’t have the shuttle, then those folks who rely on public transportation would have to think about different ways of getting to work,” said Dan McKelvy, a spokesman for the Convergys Tucson office, which employs 800.

“And they might think about working somewhere else.”

The shuttle—which isn’t costing Convergys a penny—will remain in place until the project is completed, McKelvy said. Convergys recruiters are using that information as they set up job fairs to hire an additional 200 workers this summer.

Ritter said the shuttle is an example of the individualized assistance that ADOT provides for affected businesses during construction projects. ADOT also provides tips on how to best market a business during the disruption, though it is forbidden from paying for any advertising.

“We cannot provide them with any kind of compensation; it’s something that’s not allowed,” she said.

Safety issues are also regularly addressed, said Ritter, such as the tendency of some Prince of Tucson residents to walk their dogs too close to the construction work.

“We’ve posted some fliers (in the RV park) to make sure people are safe,” Ritter said. “We have been working with them extensively. When they have a problem, we work with them.”

JESSE

BRIAN J. PEDERSEN

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tion of a box culvert through the middle.

“I probably have about 100 pictures,” Marner said.

While some residents have found enjoyment in watching the construction, it is causing headaches for many local businesses.

However, it’s a necessary evil, said Linda Ritter, a spokeswoman for the Arizona Department of Transportation.

“We’ve always been focused on the businesses, and we are with this project as well,” Ritter said. “We’ve been working (with them for) at least two years before the project began last fall.

We want to prepare them; we want them to be aware of the project. The more information they have, the better off they are.”

The preparation has included outreach meetings, a monthly newsletter and email updates.

ADOT does that with many of its projects, just as it did when I-10 was widened through downtown Tucson, she said.

The closure of Prince beneath I-10 in early March meant that many people who work on the west side of the freeway and use the bus to get there were stuck. Sun Tran Route 17 is popular with employees of Convergys, a call center northwest of the construction zone, but with the underpass closed, workers who got off the bus at Prince and Romero roads wouldn’t be able to walk the rest of the way.

Convergys representatives brought up that concern during meetings with ADOT prior to construction, resulting in ADOT setting up a free shuttle that loops around the construc-

Prince of Tucson RV Park residents Sylas Marner and Ken Pausen watch work being done on the new Prince Road interchange at Interstate 10.

The stories about competing endorsements and shifting positions on Social Security and Medicare in the Congressional District 8 race have been overshadowed by the money pouring into Southern Arizona from Washington, D.C. The Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee and the House Majority PAC, a Democratic superPAC, are spending at least $800,000 through Election Day; the National Republican Congressional Committee is spending at least $600,000, and the GOP ticket is getting a boost from the Citizens United, a right-wing superPAC that announced this week that it would spend $100,000 on TV ads.

The Republicans are focusing on how Democrat Ron Barber won’t support the complete repeal of the Affordable Care Act, aka Obamacare; the Democrats are focusing on all the radical statements Jesse Kelly has made about privatizing Medicare and Social Security, and eliminating the minimum wage and corporate taxes, as well as his other Tea Party rhetoric.

The NRCC ads, as we explained in last week’s Skinny, rely on a claim that has been repeatedly declared “false” by the Pulitzer Prize-winning fact-check operation PolitiFact. The Republicans have been pushing the talking point that Obamacare cuts Medicare by $500 billion.

As PolitiFact explains it, the federal government projects what programs such as Medicare and Social Security are going to cost in the future so that the government can anticipate what kind of demands will be placed on the budget.

The Affordable Care Act made a variety of policy changes to the Medicare program in order to reduce its costs over the next decade by $500 billion. That doesn’t mean that Medicare has actually been cut; in fact, the federal government spent $499 billion on Medicare in 2009 and still plans to spend $929 billion in 2020, according to PolitiFact.

Daniel Scarpinato, an NRCC spokesman who has the job of helping Kelly win the special election, acknowledged that some kind of Medicare spending adjustment is necessary, because “we know that Medicare is heading toward bankruptcy if we don’t find a way to protect and preserve it.”

In an interview with the Weekly, Scarpinato also conceded that while Republicans want to repeal the Affordable Care Act, they have voted to include $500 billion in spending reductions in the House budget cooked up by Wisconsin Congressman Paul Ryan.

But as we mentioned last week,

CONTINUED ON PAGE 13 MAY 17 – 23, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

11

POLICE DISPATCH

BY ANNA MIROCHA mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

VEHICLE RAPE? WEST NIGHTHAWK WAY APRIL 25, MIDNIGHT

A man reported that his pickup had been tagged with drawings of penises, according to a Pima County Sheriff’s Department report.

The man told deputies that someone had used window paint to draw penises on the windshield of his 1996 Ford Ranger, as well as on the other windows, the doors and the bumpers. He said profanities had also been written on the truck, but the report didn’t describe what they were. He also reported that the taillights had been smeared with a substance that appeared to be petroleum jelly, the man said.

He told deputies that he and his friends often tagged each other’s vehicles as a joke, but that he didn’t believe this incident was the work of a friend.

He told deputies he would contact them again if there were further incidents.

FREE-EXPRESSION LESSON UA AREA APRIL 22, 7:02 P.M.

A University of Arizona student had no trouble coming up with a string of obscenities to berate a police aide, but he suddenly shut his mouth when confronted about his actions, a University of Arizona Police Department report stated.

The police aide told officers that she had been locking a door to the Modern Languages Building when a male passerby told her, “Fuck you.”

When the aide replied, “Excuse me?” the subject then said, “Yeah, you heard me. Fuck you, you fucking pig. I hate you.”

The aide—who was concerned and a bit frightened—called UA officers, who found the subject nearby. As an officer approached him, the subject said, “Are you looking for me?” When the officer said yes, the man followed the officer outside, saying he was a student and providing a Cat Card as ID, but only after much prompting.

When asked about what the police aide reported, the subject shrugged and said he’d been “just expressing his opinion.”

He told the officers that he didn’t like law enforcement, that he’d just had a court case suspended, and that the officers were trying to “embarrass” him and “fuck him over.”

But when asked about specifics of his encounter with the police aide, he suddenly went into “no comment” mode. Why did he feel the need to curse at the aide? “No comment.” Did he hate all cops or just the UA police? “No comment.”

The subject was referred to the Dean of Students Office.

W E E K LY W I D E W E B

Love/Hate Relationship s the Tucson Weekly’s web producer, my job is essentially to get people to come to TucsonWeekly.com (which you are, regularly, right?), so I spend an absurd amount of time staring at Google Analytics, trying to figure out how to increase our online audience.

Like people at most online publications these days, we try to engage with readers by allowing comments—and for traffic purposes, the more comments, the better. People who leave comments tend to come back and keep up with the conversation, which means another few page views—and since comments are up 55 percent over last year at this time, that is adding up to more traffic.

What I wonder, however, is this: Can someone actually comment too much?

We don’t have a cap on the number of comments someone can leave as long as the comments are vaguely original, so there’s a chance that someone can dominate the arena just because they’re bored (or whatever else spurs someone on to be on pace to leave 400 comments over a six-month period). The question is: Where does the line fall between someone who comments frequently, perhaps conversing with our other users, and someone who discourages others by dumping their thoughts everywhere, with little to actually say?

While I’m thankful that people want to participate on our site, when one person has left 15 percent of this month’s comments so far, perhaps that means we need to rethink how we’re managing our comments.

A

—Dan Gibson, Web Producer dgibson@tucsonweekly.com

COMMENT OF THE WEEK “BTW, you nitwits need to get together and decide if it’s Dumbocrat or Dumbacrat. You clowns lose all credibility when you can’t even get your childish insults right.”

—TucsonWeekly.com commenter “Pete Hahn” just wants some consistency (“Jesse Kelly Just Making Stuff Up as He Goes Along,” The Range, May 12).

BEST OF WWW It’s new-intern time again here at the Tucson Weekly, as our summer batch of journalism students takes its temporary place in alt-weekly land.

Since these interns are responsible for multimedia pieces and a number of blog posts, they can generally use ideas of what to cover. Instead of grumbling on Twitter about what we do and don’t cover (we see you—don’t think we don’t), if you’re aware of some fascinating bit of Tucson culture that has cruelly remained underreported, drop a line to our web producer, Dan Gibson (dgibson@ tucsonweekly.com), and he’ll pass the best tips on to the college crew.

THE WEEK ON THE RANGE We updated you on Tom Horne’s battle against Mexican-American studies; scolded Jesse Kelly for his loose association with the facts; lamented the ends of Sal Baldenegro Jr.’s campaign and the effort to recall Michael Hicks; tried to figure out what Mitt Romney is so cranky about, and what Paul Babeu is thinking; laughed at the ludicrous conclusions drawn by Bristol Palin; watched even more ads in the Congressional District 8 special-election race; looked at the world through the strange lens of the Fox Nation; gave Sen. Al Melvin a moment to share his love for Russell Pearce; and discussed the highlights of the week’s political events with Rodd McLeod, Peter Hershberger and Sam Stone on Arizona Illustrated’s Political Roundtable, with your host, Jim Nintzel.

We suggested you catch Gary Paul Nabhan’s talk at Antigone; headed down to Elliott’s on Congress for vodka and bacon; looked forward to the new menu at Playground; and wistfully gazed at the final menu for legendary restaurant Janos.

We wished a happy birthday to David Byrne; tried to figure out where we’re going to get the money together to buy Coachella tickets; mentioned that you should think about opening your home to a shelter pet; mentioned a Kickstarter campaign by a local documentarian; previewed a possibly blasphemous comic by local author Eric Esquivel; thanked Arizona rapper Mouse Powell for remembering that our fair city actually exists; shook our heads at the rapidly expanding cost of prom night; let you know that you could be an extra in Atlas Shrugged: Part 2—Market Harder, if that’s your thing; gave up on trying to figure out the Maya calendar; studied a guide to surviving the forthcoming robot apocalypse; bought our tickets to see Def Leppard at AVA; and worried about the kid seen breastfeeding on the cover of Time.

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CURRENTS

THE SKINNY CONTINUED

The Tucson High principal search gets a do-over— and some insiders don’t buy the district’s explanation

Specific Help Wanted

BY MARI HERRERAS, mherreras@tucsonweekly.com ucson High Magnet School is the largest high school in the Tucson Unified School District—so why is the administration watering down the criteria in the search for the school’s next principal?

At the TUSD board meeting on May 8, Tucson High staffer Margaret Chaney asked governing-board members that very question during the call to the audience. Chaney said she and other staff members had recently received an email stating that the search process—which had already gone through the typical channels— was going to start all over again. “‘Since the applicants were not what we were looking for, we will actually lessen or decrease the necessary qualifications for the position for heading the largest high school in the district,’” Chaney said, reading from that district email. “… I’m wondering what possible purpose this can have on my co-workers and my students when we are constantly hearing we must raise standards and raise expectations. How does any leader who does not meet the minimal standards take us to the next level? If local applicants did not suffice, please explain what efforts were made nationally to find someone to fill the void left behind by the honorable Dr. Morado.”

Former Tucson High principal Abel Morado left in January to become the director of the district’s high schools.

I emailed TUSD spokeswoman Cara Rene and Superintendent John Pedicone regarding the process. Pedicone responded first, saying I’d hear back from Rene with an official answer, and: “I think you will find out that the re-posting was driven by an error made on the first posting that included a requirement that does not exist in the job description. But I will let the answer come to you through Human Resources.”

Rene then wrote back that the original job posting indeed “contained an error in the requirements that did not align with the job description. The original posting stated that a minimum requirement included 3 years experience as an assistant principal. The job description calls for experience as an assistant principal as a preferred qualification.”

Rene said the job was reposted to “correct the discrepancy and to ensure it aligns with the job description.”

On the original posting, three years as an assistant principal or principal is listed as a minimum requirement. In the new posting, three years of teaching experience and five years of experience in a school setting are listed as minimum requirements, while experience as a principal or assistant principal is listed under preferred qualifications.

Several people reacted to the district’s decision

from Page 11

The Ben’s Bells mosaic mural at Tucson High Magnet School.

MARI HERRERAS

T

to start the application process over by calling the Tucson Weekly with their concerns. All of the callers asked that their names not be used in this article.

At the heart of the controversy is something that most folks wouldn’t think of as controversial—the Ben’s Bells Project, which promotes acts of kindness. The project includes delivering bells to schools to be given to students who pass the “kindness” test.

Ben’s Bells was started by Jeannette Maré and Dean Packard as a way to celebrate the life of their son Ben, who died at age 2 after a bout with croup. Bells are distributed throughout the city to remind folks to be kind or to honor folks who have been kind.

Some sources say that a mistake was not made in the posting during the first search. Instead, the administration wanted a specific person for the job—but that person didn’t have the three years of experience as a principal or assistant principal. That person, I was told, was Dean Packard, who has been a Tucson High assistant principal for two years.

I emailed Packard last week asking for comment, but hadn’t heard back from him as of our press time.

It’s no secret that the school district has struggled with image issues over the years, and the perception is that a stronger relationship with Ben’s Bells is one way to help fix that—and that putting Packard in Tucson High’s top position would be a big help, too.

The sources also said that two of the top three candidates from the original posting (but not Packard, the third member of the top three) were told they were not allowed to reapply. When I asked Rene about that, she wrote back: “No. Not true. Anyone who applied in the initial posting will still have their application considered, unless they notified the district to have their application withdrawn.”

When I asked Rene if Packard’s work with Ben’s Bells, and its potential positive effect on

the district’s image, was one reason the district was interested in him, she again wrote back, “No, not true.”

The initial job posting went up on Jan. 27. TUSD says the mistake in the necessary qualifications was discovered on April 26 after the “discrepancy in minimum requirements between posting and job description was reviewed by the acting chief human resources officer, and direction was given to suspend the interview process in progress.”

On April 27, the interview process was suspended, and on April 30, the position was reposted with what TUSD officials say are the correct minimum requirements. Rene said the deadline for new applications was May 11.

Pedicone added: “I can tell you that none of the candidates in the first round were acceptable.

We attempted to reopen and seek out more possibilities with fewer years of experience, hoping that a superstar would express interest. None of those candidates, while possessing many strong qualities, are acceptable, so we are rethinking the posting and the approach. The principal at Tucson High is extremely important to this district. We must find the right person to lead this school forward. … That is where we stand at this point.”

Pedicone’s statement is interesting, because it would seem to disqualify Packard, a first-round candidate, as unacceptable.

However, that explanation doesn’t wash with one source: “Look, Dean Packard applied when there was a three-year requirement. The bar was lowered to fit Dean.” The source added that Packard would be a “wonderful principal some day,” but that he needs more experience.

But the district’s growing relationship with Ben’s Bells makes some folks at Tucson High uncomfortable.

“This doesn’t feel right, but it’s hard for some of us who don’t like it to say something,” a source said. “After all, how can someone say something against kindness or something like Ben’s Bells?”

Scarpinato argues that the GOP reductions in future spending are different from the Democratic reductions in future spending.

“The Ryan budget finds long-term savings to extend the life of Medicare, and the Obamacare plan actually cuts Medicare to fund a new entitlement program,” Scarpinato says.

Democrats argue that the Ryan budget actually uses the long-term savings to give tax breaks to America’s wealthiest citizens, while taking away healthcare coverage from the middle class.

The Ryan plan works to partially privatize Medicare, giving seniors vouchers that they could use to purchase private health insurance. But critics of the plan say that the vouchers don’t keep pace with the growth of medical inflation, and a Congressional Budget Office analysis showed that seniors would have to pay more out of pocket for their medical expenses.

“It divides up the risk pool in a way that if you’re older and facing surgery, long hospital stays or rehabilitation expenses, you’re going to be paying a bigger percentage out of pocket, or you have to pay more for the more-expensive (insurance) plan,” says Phillip Rotondi, the aforementioned senior political adviser for the National Committee to Preserve Social Security and Medicare.

While seniors would have the option of keeping traditional Medicare, Rotondi says that healthier people would opt to purchase private insurance, leaving the federal government on the hook to cover the health-care costs of older and sicker Americans.

Rotondi points out that the Affordable Care Act includes reforms that have lowered health-care costs for seniors, including more subsidies for prescription drugs and preventative care.

“I’ve seen nothing that would continue the improvements to Medicare if they repeal the act,” Rotondi says.

ANOTHER BARBERKELLY DEBATE Democrat Ron Barber, Republican Jesse Kelly and Green Party candidate Charlie Manolakis will have their second debate of the election season on Wednesday, May 23.

The debate, sponsored by the Arizona Daily Star, begins at 7 p.m. at the Tucson Jewish Community Center, 3800 E. River Road.

By Jim Nintzel Find early and late-breaking Skinny at The Range, our daily dispatch, at daily. tucsonweekly.com.

Jim Nintzel hosts the Political Roundtable every Friday on Arizona Illustrated, airing at 6:30 p.m. on KUAT Channel 6. The program repeats on 12:30 a.m., Saturday. Nintzel also talks politics with talk-show host John C. Scott on Thursday afternoons.

Scott’s show airs from 4 to 5 p.m., weekdays, on KVOI AM 1030.

MAY 17 – 23, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

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Right-

WING Rule

BY JIM NINTZEL, jnintzel@tucsonweekly.com

When the Arizona Legislature wrapped up its work on Thursday, May 3, it concluded one of the most conservative sessions in the state’s history.

GOP lawmakers—who held a two-thirds majority in both the Senate and the House of Representatives— created new barriers to abortion services, including a push to deny funding to Planned Parenthood, even for non-abortion-related health services for low-income women. They pushed through new tax cuts for Arizona’s wealthiest residents. They created a new shield of secrecy for companies that pollute. They eliminated job protections for state employees. They agreed to spend more on private prisons. And they approved the use of automatic weapons and armor-piercing ammo for hunters.

Here are some of the highlights (or lowlights, depending on your point of view) of the session. The majority of the new laws will take effect in August.

14 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

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IT WAS ANOTHER ROUGH SESSION FOR PLANNED Parenthood, which has already been forced to stop offering abortion services outside of Pima and Maricopa counties because of recently passed laws that restrict the use of medication-induced abortions.

• This year, Republican lawmakers pushed through legislation that further restricted access to abortion in Arizona. One law blocked abortion after 20 weeks of pregnancy—and redefined pregnancy as occurring at the start of a woman’s last menstrual period, effectively defining life as beginning before conception.

Critics of the legislation argue that it will give the mother little time to consider abortion if prenatal testing shows potential birth defects.

• A new law will relieve doctors of any civil liability for withholding information about potential birth defects during a pregnancy.

• Last week, Gov. Jan Brewer signed a bill that bans Planned Parenthood and any other health-care organizations that provide abortions from receiving any federal funds that pass through the state, including Medicaid funding for lowincome Arizonans, and money from family-planning programs.

If the law survives an anticipated legal challenge, it will mean that Planned Parenthood can no longer provide low-cost cancer screenings, pap smears, STD treatments, contraceptive options and other health-care services to low-income women who are on the state’s AHCCCS program.

“The impact will be felt hardest by women who choose Planned Parenthood for their care,” says Michelle Steinberg, a spokeswoman for the organization.

“They will not be able to choose their health-care provider.”

• Brewer signed into law a bill that prevents Planned Parenthood from qualifying as an eligible nonprofit under a state law that allows taxpayers to receive up to $200 in tax credits if they give money to organizations that help the working poor.

Lawmakers passed similar legislation last year, but a federal court blocked its implementation because the law said that no organization that even referred women to abortion providers could qualify as an eligible nonprofit. Federal Judge Roslyn Silver ruled that the provision restricts the free speech of workers at domestic-violence shelters and other nonprofits.

This year’s version was stripped of the provision.

• Finally, lawmakers also passed a bill that would allow “religiously affiliated employers” to refuse to provide health-care coverage for contraceptives. Brewer signed the bill on Friday, May 11.

Critics of the proposed law say it doesn’t include a definition of a “religiously affiliated employer,” so any company that gives a percentage of its profits to a church could consider itself “religiously affiliated.”

The law also eliminates language in state law that prohibits employers from firing women for using contraception, even if the women pay for the birth control themselves. And the new law doesn’t require employers to disclose to new hires that they don’t offer contraceptives coverage.

“The people who are making it as difficult as possible to access abortion services—who want to stop abortions, period—are the same people who want to restrict access to family planning,” Steinberg says. “If you reduce access to family planning, you’re going to have more abortions. And more STDs, for that matter.”

â&#x20AC;˘ State lawmakers gave a tax break to algae farms under the stateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s agricultural property-tax program.

ED UCA TIO N

SCHOOLS GOT A SSLIGHT LIGHT boost in the stateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s $8.57 $8 57 billion budget, with lawmakers adding $40 million as part of an initiative to help third-graders meet reading requirements. (See â&#x20AC;&#x153;PennyPinchers, Currents, May 10.) They also boosted spending on â&#x20AC;&#x153;soft capitalâ&#x20AC;?â&#x20AC;&#x201D;books, computers, desks and the likeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;by $15 million, and agreed to set aside $12 million for emergency school repairs, although there is no money in the budget for new school construction. â&#x20AC;˘ Schools will be able to offer electives in Bible study, thanks to Rep. Terri Proudâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bill to allow students to learn about the â&#x20AC;&#x153;history and literatureâ&#x20AC;? of the Old and New Testaments. â&#x20AC;˘ Two other bills aimed at schools did not make it through the Legislature. One would have banned teachers from using any language in the classroom that has been deemed unsuitable for broadcast by the Federal Communications Commission, and the other would have banned teachers from using â&#x20AC;&#x153;partisanâ&#x20AC;? speech in their lessons. â&#x20AC;˘ On the higher-education front, the university system will receive a $21 million spending boost, but the UA will lose its current advantage over Arizona State University and Northern Arizona University under a new funding formula. â&#x20AC;˘ The UA Medical Schoolâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Phoenix campus will get a boost of $6 million. â&#x20AC;˘ University students will be protected from the dreaded threat of medical marijuana. A new law makes it illegal to possess weed on campus, even if a person has a prescription for it.

GU NS AN DA MM O

IT WAS NOT THE E best session for Second Amendment enthusiasts. A bill to allow guns on college campuses failed in the Legislature, and Brewer vetoed a bill to allow guns in public buildings unless gun safes were provided.

But lawmakers were able to remove restrictions on the types of weapons and ammo that can be used for hunting, so hunters will now be able to use automatic weapons and armorpiercing ammo against wildlife. Hunters will also be allowed to use silencers.

TAX BREAKS â&#x20AC;˘ IN THE FINAL HOURS OF THE SESSION, lawmakers pushed through an income-tax break on investment income. The Joint Legislative Budget Committee estimates the tax cut will cost $62 million in fiscal year 2014 and rise to as much as $387 million in fiscal year 2020.

TH EB OR DE R

THE LEGISLATURE TUR RE R E DID remarkably little to help secure Arizonaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s border with Mexico this year.

A proposal to create an armed, volunteer militia to patrol the border passed in the Senate, but died in the House. Another bill, to allow the Arizona Department of Homeland Security to announce that Southern Arizona was unsafe if conditions warranted it, died after the sponsor got a negative reaction from Southern Arizona business leaders. They feared that periodically declaring the border region unsafe would be damaging to their profits.

LA W

AN DO RD ER

â&#x20AC;˘ PRIVATE PRISONS SON NSS WERE N a winner in the legislative gislative session, with lawmakers agreeing to provide them with enough funding for another 1,000 beds. Lawmakers also included enough money to build a 500-unit maximum-security prison that would be run by the state. â&#x20AC;˘ Lawmakers passed several reforms to the stateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Child Protective Services division, including streamlined processes for dealing with complaints, and a new office that will work with law enforcement when cases involve potential criminal conduct. â&#x20AC;˘ A new law will prohibit the shackling of pregnant prisoners while they give birth, unless security conditions require it. â&#x20AC;˘ Defendants facing DUI charges will once again have the right to a trial by jury.

Lawmakers took that right away last year, but restored it because of potential legal problems. â&#x20AC;˘ Minors will no longer be allowed to possess hookahs or water pipes. â&#x20AC;˘ Passive resistance to arrest has been reclassified as a Class 1 misdemeanor, punishable by up to six months in jail and up to $2,500 in fines. â&#x20AC;˘ You may want to be careful about what you write on Facebook in the future. Legislators expanded the current laws against stalking to include unwanted digital contact. â&#x20AC;˘ State Sen. Frank Antenori, who has had several high-profile run-ins with photoradar enforcement, pushed a bill through the Legislature that would redefine the boundaries of an intersection to make it more difficult for motorists to get ticketed for running red lights.

But Brewer vetoed the bill, citing concerns from law enforcement. continued on next page

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MAY 17 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 23, 2012

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THE SIERRA CLUB WAS A BIG LOSER THIS session. â&#x20AC;˘ GOP lawmakers pushed through an environmental audit billâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;dubbed the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Polluter Protection Actâ&#x20AC;? by Sierra Club lobbyist Sandy Bahrâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;that will allow corporations that violate environmental regulations to avoid penalties if they report the violations to the state and promise to clean up their messes. Any reports regarding pollution can be kept secret, even in civil lawsuits that involve damages resulting from the pollution. â&#x20AC;˘ Brewer also signed into law a bill that allows Freeport-McMoRan Copper and Gold to pump groundwater from the Tucson Active Management Area without penalty, as long as it accumulates credits for Central Arizona Project water. â&#x20AC;˘ Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll soon be seeing more electronic billboards with changing messages along Arizona highways. After vetoing a broader measure earlier this year because of concerns that the billboards could damage the astronomy industry, Brewer signed a bill last week that amends state law to allow them in Phoenix and southwestern

Arizona, although they are not allowed within 75 miles of observatories. (The law allows any existing electronic billboards within the prohibited areas to remain.) â&#x20AC;˘ State Sen. Al Melvin tried to continue his revolt against the U.S. government with a bill that demanded that the federal government hand over all of the land it owns in Arizona to the state, with the exception of military bases and national parks. (National monuments and other federal holdings would have become the property of the state.) Melvinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s plan included a provision that if the state sells any of the land, 95 percent of the proceeds go to the federal government, with 5 percent going to Arizona schools.

However, Brewer vetoed the bill, saying that Melvinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s proposal violated the U.S. Constitution. â&#x20AC;˘ An effort to roll back renewable-energy standards that promote the solar-energy industry in Arizona did not pass.

YOU MAKE THE CALL LAWMAKERS HAVE PROPOSED SEVERAL constitutional amendments that voters will decide on the November ballot. â&#x20AC;˘ HCR 2004 is a companion piece to Melvinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s aforementioned bill. It would ask voters to amend the Arizona Constitution to assert state sovereignty over federal lands in order to buttress Melvinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hoped-for lawsuit to force the feds to hand over their land in the state. â&#x20AC;˘ HCR 2056 would increase the amount of money paid out of the state trusts to Arizona schools.

â&#x20AC;˘ SCR 1001 would allow the state to swap state-trust land to preserve military installations. â&#x20AC;˘ SCR 1012 would increase the amount of a tax exemption available to businesses for their equipment. â&#x20AC;˘ SCR 1025 would limit how much a property could increase in value for taxing purposes. â&#x20AC;˘ Two controversial proposals did not make the ballot. One would have required that any proposed tax increases on the ballot get at least 60 percent of the vote, creating the possibility of minority rule in Arizona. Another would have required that successful initiatives involving spending and taxes be reapproved by voters every decade.

ODDS AND ENDS â&#x20AC;˘ AT BREWERâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S REQUEST, GOP LAWMAKERS approved legislation stripping most future state workers of civil-service rights that protect them from being fired for political or other reasons.

Current workers will have to surrender those protections if they accept a one-time 5 percent pay bonus or a promotion that includes a raise in salary. â&#x20AC;˘ Dogs on ranches were exempted from city, town and county statutes related to animal cruelty if the dogs are being used to herd livestock. â&#x20AC;˘ Pima County will face a special audit of its bond program. â&#x20AC;˘ Public libraries will have to deploy software to prevent adults from viewing obscene material on computers accessible to the public. â&#x20AC;˘ Arizona will have a poet laureate, thanks to

legislation from Sen. Al Melvin that created the position. â&#x20AC;˘ State lawmakers agreed to reauthorize the Arizona Commission for the Arts for another decade. â&#x20AC;˘ A last-minute effort to create a special fund to reimburse elected officials for their campaign expenses if they were subject to a recall election did not pass. The legislation was aimed at providing a way to reimburse former state lawmaker Russell Pearce for the $260,000 in campaign contributions that he spent unsuccessfully trying to prevent voters from booting him from office last year. â&#x20AC;˘ Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t look for more Hollywood stars around Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;a push to create tax incentives for movie and TV productions died in the Legislature. â&#x20AC;˘ Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll now be able to celebrate the founding of the Girl Scouts as an official state holiday, albeit one that does not include a day off for state employees. Henceforth, March 12 is Girl Scouts of the United States of America Day.

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CITYWEEK

MAY 17-23, 2012 OUR TOP PICKS OF WHAT TO DO AND WHERE TO DO IT

BY GENE ARMSTRONG AND DAVID MENDEZ

Dramatic Danes

Headlocks and Characters

PICK OF THE WEEK

Take a handful of conservatory-trained musicians well-versed in the vocabulary of classical and jazz music. Then add a healthy interest in 1980s hard rock; a respect for the timeless tradition of punk experimentalism; and an abiding faith in contemporary Americana.

What do you get? The dramatic, sometimes psychedelic and always moving indie-rock of Danish band Alcoholic Faith Mission.

On its first major North American tour, Alcoholic Faith Mission will make its Tucson debut this Saturday, May 19, at Plush. Although the group’s members live in or around Copenhagen, Alcoholic Faith Mission began—in a way—in the United States.

In 2005, singer-songwriter Thorben Seierø Jensen and bassist Sune Sølund, who are former high-school buddies, were on an extended trip through the U.S. and spent a few months in New York City. While strolling through Brooklyn, they stumbled across a church named the Apostolic Faith Mission, and recent discussions about alcoholic acquaintances led to a play on words.

“The two of us had been playing around with some new music, and we thought it would be a pretty cool band name,” Jensen said by phone from Seattle on a rare day off between gigs.

Back in Denmark, they recorded the band’s first album, a lo-fi affair, on a laptop in Jensen’s bedroom. “It was just the two of us, and then pretty soon, Kristine and the others started joining in.”

The band now is a sextet, including Kristine Permild (who provides the cool feminine vocal counterpoint to Jensen), Anders Hjort, Gustav Rasmussen and Morten Hyldahl.

Alcoholic Faith Mission has released four albums—three of them available in the U.S.—the most recent of which, Ask Me This, was released this year.

Some critics have lumped in Alcoholic Faith Mission with the musical movement lazily dubbed “sadcore,” a blatant example of reductionism that does the band’s music a disservice.

On Ask Me This, the orchestral combination of indie pop and progressive rock is emotionally cathartic, hinting at a diverse range of influences, from Philip Glass and the minimalist school of composers to medieval choral music and electro-pop, from Kate Bush to Wilco. Some have compared the results to contemporary rock collectives such as Arcade Fire, Stereolab, Do Make Say Think, Broken Social Scene and Dungen.

As for Jensen, he thinks the perfect ingredients in an Alcoholic Faith Mission song are as follows: “It’s a strong beat. It’s kind of a beat with a twist, a bit quirky. I like to think that a strong hook line or melody might make it in there a couple of times, something that mixes things up a bit, takes you a bit off-kilter.”

He acknowledges that catharsis and melancholy have a lot to do with the music of Alcoholic Faith Mission, but said it also contains elements of humor and irony.

18 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

SPORTS

“I write the lyrics, and they are a bit of a release for me. Some of them reflect things that happen in my life, but are maybe not repeated verbatim, or they reflect what interests me in the lives of some of the other people I see around me. And there is a lot of melancholy, as there is in most Scandinavian music, probably because it is always so dark all the time, you know?”

He cites the ultimate Scandinavian band, Sweden’s ABBA, as a good example. “I know, you might call it disco or high-gloss pop or whatever, but whether you like it or not, what saves ABBA’s music is that undercurrent of melancholy. If it hadn’t been there, it Alcoholic Alcoholic Faith Faith Mission Mission would have come off as really cheesy, but as a result, it somehow has weight.”

On tour with Alcoholic Faith Mission is the Boston-based indie-rock band You Won’t. The bands share the same label, Old Flame Records, which released You Won’t’s debut album, Skeptic Goodbye, last year.

“They’re really sweet guys,” Jensen said of You Won’t. “And they do some really interesting stuff. The last couple of shows, we have been going onstage to play a song with them.”

Jensen isn’t sure what the future holds for Alcoholic Faith Mission, but he hopes it includes “sex, power and money.”

“Actually, it would be nice if we can continue to do what we do now, and maybe quit our part-time jobs back home.”

Alcoholic Faith Mission plays Saturday, May 19, at Plush, 340 E. Sixth St., with opening acts You Won’t and, from Tucson, The Vases. The show starts at 9:30 p.m. Admission is $8 in advance, or $10 at the door. For more information, call 798-1298, or visit plushtucson.com.

Gene Armstrong garmstrong@tucsonweekly.com

Dangerously Intense Wrestling 6:30 p.m., Friday, May 18 Dunbar Cultural Center 325 W. Second St. Facebook.com/DIWarizona

When you think of professional wrestling, images of Hulk Hogan and his ilk probably come to mind—the tan, baby-oil-soaked bodybuilders who tend to populate WWE. But rarely do those performers truly love wrestling.

Passionate proponents of the squared circle are typically found in the independent circuit, where personality and storytelling often take precedence over muscleheads and flashy moves.

Dangerously Intense Wrestling promoter/commissioner Nick Wilkinson, 33, fell in love with those aspects of wrestling when he was growing up in the late ’90s, during pro wrestling’s boom time. But WWE—in those days, the WWF—wasn’t his focus.

“I grew up in Philadelphia around Ring of Honor, Combat Zone Wrestling and Extreme Championship Wrestling,” Wilkinson said. “I was third row for most of the most-famous round-robin challenges they had, or working security, or helping with the ring crew. That sort of ‘indie era,’ especially in Philadelphia, was just amazing to be a part of.”

Wilkinson said he has worked nearly every job in wrestling since he moved here seven years ago. “But it wasn’t quite what I wanted to do, so we brought things back from Philadelphia to do it our way,” he said.

Wilkinson hopes to blow crowds away with nearly 10 matchups on the evening’s card. They feature performers such as the Disco Kid, Shot Saxon, the Nordic Nightmare and the Knome King.

“DIW shows are a little more fastpaced, a little more hard-hitting,” he said. “We also really focus on characters. … It’s more than just the athletics—it’s a show.”

This show is the first in a two-part series. The second, in Phoenix on June 22, will determine the DIW champion.

Tickets are $8; children younger than 10 are admitted for free. —D.M.

Byrd Baylor

Stories That Soar’s Aaron Guisinger, Cyndi LaFrese, Greg Colburn, Tiffany Bicheler and Kristen Islas.

SPECIAL EVENTS

KIDS & FAMILIES

MUSIC

Supporting Central America

Children Responding

Hyper-Local Radio

St. Michael’s Guatemala Project Send-Off With Byrd Baylor

The Best of Stories That Soar!

Benefit Show for LPFM Community Radio

4 and 6:30 p.m., Sunday, May 20

10 p.m., Friday, May 18

Temple of Music and Art 330 S. Scott Ave.

La Cocina at Old Town Artisans 201 N. Court Ave.

882-8006; literacyconnects.org

820-3482

cprguatemalaproject.org

For 19 years, St. Michael’s Guatemala Project has worked to bring medical supplies and support to people in some of the most-remote mountain locations in Central America. This year, the project will field the largest team in its history, a feat that members want to celebrate with the community.

One of the highlights of the celebration is a reading by noted author Byrd Baylor.

Project coordinator Ila Abernathy began volunteering with St. Michael’s in the late ’80s and joined a delegation to Guatemala and Nicaragua in 1991.

“A few years later, a national organization related information that people who had become internal refugees were asking for an international visit, which would be the first time people had walked into the mountains where they went into hiding,” Abernathy said.

Abernathy helped establish a relationship with those refugees and their organizations during Guatemala’s civil war, delivering supplies and maintaining a presence.

“This is a very informal, very small project,” Abernathy said. “It’s not like a typical group that goes down, does intensive medical work, then leaves.

Our primary focus is on supporting existing structures.”

Byrd Baylor is a local treasure. A resident of Arivaca, she has written more than 25 children’s books, numerous essays and a recently republished novel, Yes Is Better Than No. “She has been a tremendous friend, not only to the flora and fauna of the desert and the indigenous people of the area, but (has also been) very human in her response to migrants in distress,” Abernathy said.

Attendees will also have a chance to speak with Guatemala Project participants and enjoy a build-your-owntostada bar.

The event is free, although donations are encouraged. —D.M.

The Best of Stories That Soar! is back for its seventh year of honoring the work of some of the brightest, most-creative minds in our community: Tucson’s children.

Stories That Soar! is a literacy-outreach program with a storytelling twist. Instead of prompting students to read and write about predetermined topics, STS! gives kids the opportunity to write their own stories, and feed them to the hungry, story-eating Magic Box. Kids then watch their stories as they’re performed by musicians and professional actors.

This year alone, STS! artistic director Sharon O’Brien has received more than 6,000 stories.

“Kids respond to the things around them,” she said. “A few years ago, when we got snow in Tucson, we got a ton of stories about snow. When Michael Jackson died, a number of stories were about him. Lately, we’ve had a lot of stories about Justin Bieber.”

O’Brien said “each school has a flavor of its own,” with students writing about characters such as evil lunch ladies or rapping dogs. “We’ve even had a lot of 2012, end-of-the-world stories. Kids are very attuned to the world around them,” she said.

“Stories That Soar is about empowering youth by giving voice to their words and ideas,” O’Brien said. “Our role is to honor those stories in the most-creative way possible … to show the depth and the beauty, or the humor or seriousness, of whatever the kids are writing about.”

This year’s Best of Stories That Soar! features two shows, each with 15 original productions. A “Satellite Celebration” between the shows features food, more Stories That Soar! performances and appearances by Flam Chen, Tucson’s circus-and-fire performance troupe.

Tickets for each show are $10 for adults, and $5 for children younger than 12. —D.M.

6 p.m., Saturday, May 19 St. Michael and All Angels Episcopal Church 602 N. Wilmot Road

Tucsonans are lucky—we’ve got fantastic community-oriented media, ranging from KXCI FM 91.3 to Access Tucson to this very publication. Now, low-power FM radio proponent Jason LeValley hopes to add even more voices to the mix.

The Local Community Radio Act of 2010, signed into law by President Barack Obama last year, is designed to help communities develop more of a voice via the airwaves. LeValley and his partner, Chet Gardiner, have made it their goal to bring low-power, local radio to Tucson.

“You can go from city to city, and most of the radio formats are the same thing,” LeValley said. LPFM stations, however, “are really designed to give communities a chance to put issues of concern on the air and create local programming.”

According to LeValley, the Tucson area has the capacity to carry as many as six LPFM stations, each with a signal broadcasting within a five-mile radius.

He wants the first station to be located in downtown Tucson atop the Access Tucson building.

“It’s time to get all of our ducks in a row and be able to submit a goodlooking application when the (Federal Communications Commission) opens its window for accepting licenses (this fall), LeValley said. “That means that the station should go on the air in January 2013, we’re hoping.”

All money raised at Friday’s event will go toward equipment for the station, which LeValley hopes will feature community talk radio as well as local music that’s “edgier” than what you might find on KXCI. Headlining the bill is Tucson psychedelic-pop outfit Holy Rolling Empire.

They’ll be joined by Sacred Machine Gallery owner Daniel Martin Diaz’s band Blind Divine, and local power-trio The Wolfgang.

Admission is $5. —D.M.

Submissions CityWeek includes events selected by Gene Armstrong and David Mendez and is accurate as of press time. Tucson Weekly recommends calling event organizers to check for last-minute changes in location, time, price, etc. To have material considered, please send complete information by Monday at noon 11 days prior to publication. Send to: Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726, or fax information to 792-2096, or e-mail us at listings@tucsonweekly.com.

MAY 17 – 23, 2012

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SPECIAL EVENTS

TQ&A

EVENTS THIS WEEK

Patrick McArdle

AERIAL DESSERT CABARET Barrio Brewing Company. 800 E. 16th St. 791-2739.

Flam Chen performs aerial acrobatics, and the Missing Parts provide live music, for a gourmet dessert buffet, from 8 to 10 p.m., Thursday, May 17; $35. Call or visit flamchen.com for reservations or more information.

Shot in the Dark Café seemed like the perfect place to talk with Patrick McArdle (a former Tucson Weekly intern) about his new project, Digital Downtown Darkroom. On the walls of the café hangs Dog Soldier and Wolf … From the Fifth World, a new show that includes rusted car hoods, fenders and such adorned with photos by McArdle and paintings by his wife, To-Ree-Nee Wolf. The show ends June 9 with a closing reception from 7 to 9 p.m. at the café, 121 E. Broadway Blvd. The Digital Downtown Darkroom is at 735 N. Alder Ave. For more on the darkroom, search for it on Facebook, or visit digitaldowntowndarkroom.com.

ARIZONA CENTENNIAL STATE-WIDE FLY-IN Ryan Airfield. 9698 W. Ajo Way. 883-9800. A fly-in from throughout the state celebrates the history of aircraft in Arizona, from 7 a.m. to noon, Saturday, May 19; free. Aircraft range from antique to contemporary. The event includes a pancake breakfast from 7 to 10 a.m., static-aircraft displays, educational exhibits and controltower tours.

BYRD BAYLOR READS FOR THE GUATEMALA PROJECT St. Michael and All Angels Episcopal Church. 602 N. Wilmot Road. 886-7292. Byrd Baylor reads from her essays, novel and children’s stories following a meal of build-your-own tostadas at 6 p.m., Saturday, May 19; freewill donation. The event is a sendoff for 15 volunteers departing for Guatemala.

Mari Herreras, mherreras@tucsonweekly.com

Tell me about Digital Downtown Darkroom.

I wanted to set it up so it’s a community darkroom that has resources for anyone interested in traditional photography, digital photography, and sometimes incorporating the two. What I am realizing is that digital and traditional haven’t touched each other too much, other than taking a negative and scanning it. I wanted to create a community space for those two endeavors, and for those to merge together creatively.

Are you getting a lot of interest?

There are some folks who use it on a regular basis— one who is a traditional photographer, and one who is learning from the very beginning. That’s fun and exciting to watch. Really, I am just starting to get the word out and get more people involved.

Do you want this to turn into a membership organization?

Not right now. I know I don’t want to set it up as a for-profit. (I want it to) be a community-based situation and ultimately do a nonprofit with it. But I’m in no hurry. I’m having fun.

What do you have at the darkroom?

I have six functional enlargers. It’s a very good space with a nice lounging area, and then the digital 20 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

production area. In the last month or so, I’ve kept hearing the phrase “digital darkroom.” What we have is a high-end professional printer, and the computer, scanner and equipment that’s involved with digital photography—software programs. Right now, it’s my own computer. There’s a printer and scanner, so if someone has a laptop, I can work with them to print stuff and scan stuff.

When you talk about merging the two mediums creatively, what do you mean?

Right now, I’m working with an old Brownie camera. My intention is to process the film, then scan it. And from a scan, I want to make a print from an ink jet (printer), and then take that print and photograph it with a film camera, and process that film and see what happens.

That’s just my own idea and my own approach; I’m sure the more I think about it, the more ideas I’ll come up with.

And others who come to the darkroom will have their own ideas. There’s a lot of exploring.

How will the project support itself?

First, I really want to reach out and get people in, and I don’t want to charge anyone.

I’m taking most of the cost. I provide chemicals; they just have to provide the paper.

If someone wants to make a donation, great, but right

now, I like the aspect of bringing people together to learn and share.

I miss going into a darkroom.

I hear that from a lot of people. A lot of people miss out on that opportunity to be creative. With digital cameras, we don’t always get to experience that anymore.

There used to be this sixth sense of taking photos and developing them. Now, with digital, it’s a shotgun approach. There are digital photos that win Pulitzers or go viral—those things happen—but often, it’s not a great photograph.

So you’re going to have classes?

Yes, the first one is going to be how to put the film on the reel and roll it up (to develop negatives). We’ll have snacks and coffee, and roll the film on the reel. When they get past that, then they can do something else. I’ve taught classes in the past. I’m not going to do a lot of history.

It’s about: “This is film. These are the chemicals, and this is an enlarger. Let’s get in there, and get you printing.”

It’s really gratifying to see the students make their first print. After 20 minutes in there, they don’t want to talk to me. They just want me to leave them alone.

CANDLELIGHT OBSERVANCE FOR THOSE TAKEN BY HIV/AIDS Himmel Branch, Pima County Public Library. 1035 N. Treat Ave. 594-5305. From 6 to 8 p.m., Sunday, May 20, all are invited to the amphitheater to reflect on the millions of men, women and children lost to HIV/AIDS; free. The AIDS Ribbon Tucson is available for signing; guests may read a poem, say a prayer, read names of those lost, and burn their own candles or use the ones provided. Search for AIDS Candlelight Memorial Vigil on Facebook for more information.

THE GREAT MASQUERADE ESCAPADE Congress Street from Fourth to Fifth avenues is transformed into Bourbon Street for The Great Masquerade Escapade: The Ball to End All, from 6 p.m. to midnight, Saturday, May 19; $85. The Centurions host the party with a Phantom’s Feast, music by The Trip, raffles and gambling for charity. The guests provide the color with festive and outrageous Carnivale costumes for the Carnivale Parade and the Come as You Aren’t Costume Contest. Call 873-5032, or visit thecenturions.com for reservations. Proceeds benefit Carondelet St. Mary’s Hospital.

LGBT-STRAIGHT ALLIANCE FUND EVENING Stillwell-Twiggs House. 134 S. Fifth Ave. 620-0947.

Wingspan thanks donors to the Alliance Fund and Queer Youth Initiative grants with an evening featuring music, food and beverages, from 4:30 to 7:30 p.m., Sunday, May 20; free to donors. RSVP to douglas.noffsinger@ comcast.net. Visit the calendar at wingspan.org.

PAWS OF THE PAST Brandi Fenton Memorial Park. 3482 E. River Road.

877-6154. Pet owners who have adopted from Hope Animal Shelter are invited to bring their pets to a public event from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday, May 19; free.

Activities include music, food and beverage vendors, pet massage, a pet psychic, henna-painting, pet contests, a raffle and a silent auction. Call 792-9200.

‘POETRY OFF THE PAGE’: A SYMPOSIUM Art installations, film screenings and library and art exhibits take place concurrently with a three-day conference of presentations and performances, from Friday through Sunday, May 18 through 20; $150, $80 student. Presenters and performers include Julie Carr and K.J. Holmes, Black Took Collective, Brent Cunningham, Christine Hume, Douglas Kearney and Ander Monson, among others. Symposium venues are the UA Poetry Center, 1508 E. Helen St.; MOCA, 265 S. Church Ave.; and the Rogue Theatre, 300 E. University Blvd. Visit poetry.arizona.edu to register and for more information.

OUT OF TOWN KINO FESTIVAL Tubac Presidio State Historic Park. 1 Burruel St. Tubac.

398-2252. A variety of events and displays are featured throughout a festival honoring the life of 17th-century Jesuit missionary and explorer Padre Eusebio Francisco Kino, from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., through Sunday, May 20; $4, $2 child age 7 through 13, free younger child.

Additional Kino Festival activities and tours take place at Tumacácori National Historic Park and Misión San Xavier del Bác. Visit tubacpresidiopark.com for more information and the complete schedule.

SOLAR ECLIPSE EVENT AT KITT PEAK OBSERVATORY Kitt Peak National Observatory. State Route 86, Tohono O’odham Reservation. 318-8726. Visitors experience

two full hours of eclipse-viewing, make their own pinhole-camera eclipse-viewing box (bring a box), see Venus in the daytime and watch hands-on demonstrations of moon phases, from 3 to 7:30 p.m., Sunday, May 20; $38, $25 child age 6 through 16; add $37, $40 child age 6 through 16, to include an after-dark observing session. Reservations are required by noon, Saturday, May 19. Call 318-8736, or email martino@noao.edu to register and for more information.

UPCOMING KORE PRESS BENEFIT AUCTION AND GARDEN PARTY The Franklin House. 402 N. Main Ave. 622-6533. Art and services are auctioned at a garden party at 6 p.m., Sunday, May 27; $25, $20 advance, free child age 12 or younger. Food, beverages and live music are included.

Proceeds benefit Kore Press, which publishes books by women and organizes numerous writing programs for youth. Call 327-2127, or email kore@korepress.org for tickets or more information.

BULLETIN BOARD EVENTS THIS WEEK AARP SAFETY DRIVER COURSE Tucson Jewish Community Center. 3800 E. River Road.

299-3000, ext. 106. A refresher course for drivers older than 50 takes place from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Thursday, May 17; $14, $12 AARP member. Call 296-1131 for reservations and more information.

AIDS FRIENDS AND FAMILY SUPPORT GROUP SAAF. 375 S. Euclid Ave. 628-7223. An educational support group for friends and family of people living with HIV/AIDS takes place from 5:30 to 6:45 p.m., the third Thursday of every month; free. Call Stacey Luethje at 628-7223 for more information.

ARTS AND CRAFTS FAIR SEEKS VENDORS Water of Life MCC. 3269 N. Mountain Ave. 292-9151.

Vendors and food vendors are sought for an arts and crafts fair with a food court from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday, May 26. Call 207-5702, or email ellendavia@ gmail.com to request applications and additional info.

COMMUNIST PARTY USA CLUB MEETING Salt of the Earth Labor College. 1902 E. Irene Vista.

235-0694. A discussion of party activities takes place at 7 p.m., the first and third Monday of every month; free. Call 624-4789 for more information.

ENVELOPES COMMEMORATE TUCSON AND THE CIVIL WAR Postal History Foundation. 920 N. First Ave. 623-6652.

A pair of specially designed souvenir envelopes, with new U.S. stamps commemorating Civil War battles at Antietam and New Orleans, are available from 1 to 3 p.m., Sunday, May 20; $4 for the set. The envelope design includes the U.S. flag that was correct for May 20, 1862, when Tucson was returned to the Union following the skirmish at Picacho Pass.

FOX THEATRE BENEFIT AT AGUSTÍN BRASSERIE Agustín Brasserie. 100 S. Avenida del Convento, No. 150. 398-5382. From 11 a.m. until closing, Thursday, May 17, a portion of all sales at Agustín Brasserie benefits the Fox Tucson Theatre Foundation. Guests also can win tickets to upcoming Fox shows and T-shirts. See the menu at agustinbrasserie.com.

FREE PRESENTATION ON EMERGENCY AND DISASTER PREPAREDNESS Adults are invited to a presentation about ways to prepare for an emergency or disaster, from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday, May 19; free. Light refreshments are served, and preparedness kits may be ordered.

Reservations are requested by Thursday, May 17. Call 336-7220, or email events@surviveprepare.com for more information.

FUNDRAISERS FOR NATIONAL LATINO AIDS AWARENESS DAY A percentage of revenue from beer busts will help fund National Latino AIDS Awareness Day, Monday, Oct. 15. All are from 5 to 7 p.m. Sunday, May 20: Brodie’s Tavern, 2449 N. Stone Ave. Saturday, June 9: Venture N, 1239 N. Sixth Ave. Sunday, July 15: New Moon Tucson, 915 W. Prince Road. Call 628-7223 for information.

FUNDRAISING: BEYOND THE BAKE SALE Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. Learn how to identify a good fundraising event, incorporate your mission into it, secure sponsorship and plan for success, from 9 a.m. to noon, Friday, May 18; free. Reservations are required. Call 791-4010, or visit library.pima.gov to register or for more information.

IMPROVE YOUR PHOTOGRAPHY Kirk-Bear Canyon Branch, Pima County Library. 8959 E. Tanque Verde Road. 594-5275. Ages 14 and older learn practical tips and techniques from professional photographer Steve Renzi from 2 to 3 p.m., Saturday, May 19.

Registration is not required.

LOL TUCSON HAPPY HOUR The Shanty. 401 E. Ninth St. 623-2664. Michelle Steinberg, policy director for Planned Parenthood Arizona, discusses ways to respond to bills recently passed by the Arizona State Legislature that affect women’s health and reproductive rights, from 5 to 7 p.m., Thursday, May 17; free. Visit arizonalist.org for more information.

MAKING THINGS HAPPEN WITH WHAT WE ALREADY HAVE Ward 6 City Council Office. 3202 E. First St. 7914601. A workshop covers how community groups can identify talents, skills and knowledge of neighborhood residents, and how those assets might contribute to improving the condition of the neighborhood, from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m., Wednesday, May 23; free.

MANY HANDS COURTYARD Many Hands Courtyard. 3054 N. First Ave. 419-7191.

An artisan courtyard features craft demonstrations, live music, tea samples and free refreshments from 5 to 9 p.m., the third Saturday of the month, through July.

Donations of food, money and accessories are accepted for the Humane Society of Southern Arizona. Visit manyhandscourtyard.blogspot.com for more information.

MONSOON MUTTNESS Pima Animal Care Center. 4000 N. Silverbell Road.

743-7550. Adoption discounts, giveaways, free food, games, a dog show and raffles are featured at an adoption event from 10 a.m. to 7 p.m., Saturday, May 19; free.

PCOA AMBASSADOR PROGRAM Martha Cooper Branch, Pima County Public Library.

1377 N. Catalina Ave. 594-5315. From 10 a.m. to noon, Monday, May 21, a volunteer for the Pima Council on Aging provides information and answers questions about support available to seniors for caregiving, meals, housing, legal services and transportation; free.

PHILOSOPHICAL DISCUSSION GROUP Metropolitan Grill. 7892 N. Oracle Road. 531-1212.

Lively, friendly and civil discussions of philosophical questions old and new take place at 6 p.m., the first and third Monday of every month; free. Call 575-1743 for more information.

POVERTY ANONYMOUS SUPPORT GROUP Sunrise Apartments. 3636 N. Campbell Ave. 795-0855.

A support group based on a text by group-moderator Jeff Sonnenburg, For Those Addicted to Never Having Enough, meets in the clubhouse from 6 to 6:50 p.m., Friday, May 18; free. RSVP to 261-1454.

ROCKET LAUNCH Tucson International Modelplex Association Complex.

3250 N. Reservation Road. Spectators watch and learn about model rocketry from 8 a.m. to noon, Sunday, May 20; $5 launch, free spectator and younger than 18. Rental rockets with motors are available for $2 per launch. The club has a waiver for rockets to fly up to 4,500 feet. Visit sararocketry.org for more information.

SAGUARO EASTSIDE DEMOCRATS AND TANQUE VERDE VALLEY DEMOCRATS New Spirit Lutheran Church. 8701 E. Old Spanish Trail.

296-2461. CD 8 candidate Ron Barber addresses a joint meeting at 7 p.m., Monday, May 21, and a Q&A follows; free. Light refreshments are served at 6:30 p.m.

Call 850-6755 for more information.

SOCRATES SATURDAY FORUM Ward 6 City Council Office. 3202 E. First St. 7914601. All are welcome to join a philosophical discussion at 9 a.m., the first and third Saturday of every month; free. Email lanamorgan1@yahoo.com for more info.

SOLAR POWER 101 Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. Mayor Jonathan Rothschild introduces an ongoing community-education series offering practical information and industry updates about solar energy, from 6 to 7:30 p.m., Wednesday, May 23; free. Call 791-4010 for more information.

SOUTHERN ARIZONA ARTS GUILD Miguel’s. 5900 N. Oracle Road. 887-3777. Local artists are invited to participate in meetings at 8:30 a.m., the first and third Saturday of every month; $13, $10 member. Meetings on the third Saturday include a casual critique session. Visit southernazartsguild.org to verify meeting location and for more information.

THAI FOOD COMMUNITY BUFFET FUNDRAISER Wat Buddhametta: Tucson Buddhist Meditation Center.

1133 S. Swan Road. 745-4624. All-you-can-eat pad

Thai, egg rolls, chicken curry, vegetarian curry, desserts and more are served from 6 to 8 p.m., the third Saturday of every month; $10; free child younger than 10. Proceeds help support free classes at the center.

TUCSON INDESIGN USER GROUP LAUNCH UA School of Art. 1031 N. Olive Road. Marc Oxborrow, design director at Phoenix content-marketing company Mcmurry.com, presents “Type Essentials and Expert Tips” via remote broadcast at 5:30 p.m., Tuesday, May 22; free. The event includes free pizza and raffle prizes.

Call (602) 395-5850 for more information.

UNDERSTANDING COLLABORATION Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. Strategic collaborations, joint programming and mergers in the nonprofit sector are the topic of a workshop from 3:30 to 5:30 p.m., Tuesday, May 22; free. Reservations are required. Call 791-4010, or visit library.pima.gov to register or for more information.

WORKSHOPS: GARDEN COMPOSTING, ALUMINUM CASTING Xerocraft. 1301 S. Sixth Ave. 906-0352. Workshops take place at noon, Saturday, May 19; $5 requested donation. Visit xerocraft.org for more information.

OUT OF TOWN COPPER CLASSIC CAR SHOW Old Bisbee, Arizona. (520) 432-5421. Classic cars, prize-drawings, goody bags and music are featured from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m., Saturday, May 19; free. Food is available. Call (520) 432-3554, or visit bisbeearizona.com for more information.

DEMOCRATIC CLUB OF THE SANTA RITA AREA Green Valley Democratic Headquarters. 260 W. Continental Road. Green Valley. 838-0590. Current events are discussed from 11 a.m. to 12:30 p.m., every Wednesday; free. Email acalkins10@aol.com, or visit gvdemocrats.org for more information.

UPCOMING SONORAN SUPERMARKET Martha Cooper Branch, Pima County Public Library.

1377 N. Catalina Ave. 594-5315. Food, medicine, tools and fibers that native peoples of the Sonoran Desert traditionally derived from local resources are displayed by the Arizona-Sonora Desert Museum from 6 to 7 p.m., Tuesday, May 29; free. Visitors experiment with using native plant materials to make cordage.

SUMMER WINE RELEASE Canelo Hills Vineyard and Winery. 342 Elgin Road.

Elgin. (520) 455-5499. Two new white wines and a new rosé are introduced, and tours of the winery are offered, from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Friday through Monday, May 25 through 28; free admission, $8 wine-tasting, $5 wine-tasting with a glass from another local winery. Visit canelohillswinery.com for more information.

140 North Main Avenue

520-624-2333 TucsonMuseumofArt.org

ON VIEW NOW through June 3, 2012 at the Tucson Museum of Art

ANNOUNCEMENTS FARMERS’ MARKETS Alan Ward Downtown Mercado: south lawn of the Main Library, 101 N. Stone Ave., 8 a.m. to 2 p.m., Wednesday, October through May; 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., Wednesday, June through September (339-4008).

Arivaca Farmers’ Market: 16800 Arivaca Road, Arivaca, 9 a.m. to noon, Saturday. Bisbee Farmers’ Market: Vista Park in the Warren section, 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday (520-227-5060). Community Food Bank: 3003 S. Country Club Road, 8 a.m. to noon, Tuesday (6220525). Corona de Tucson Farmers’ Market: 15921 S. Houghton Road, Vail, 8 a.m. to noon, Friday (8701106). Douglas Farmers’ Market: Raul Castro Park, between D and E avenues, downtown Douglas, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Sunday (520-805-5938 or 520-805-0086).

El Presidio Plaza Park Mercado: 115 N. Church Ave., 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., Friday (339-4008). El Pueblo Farmers’ Market: El Pueblo Neighborhood Center parking lot, SW corner of Irvington Road and Sixth Avenue, 8 to 11 a.m., Saturday (882-3304). Elgin Farmers’ Market: KiefJoshua Vineyards, 370 Elgin Road, Elgin, 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., Sunday, May through October (520-455-5582).

Farmers’ Markets at La Posada Green Valley: 665 S. Park Centre Ave., Green Valley, is 8:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m., Monday (603-8116). Farmers’ Market at Voyager RV Resort: 8701 S. Kolb Road, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Thursday (603-8116). Friday Farmers’ Market at Broadway Village: 2926 E. Broadway Blvd., 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Friday (603-8116). Green Valley Village Farmers’ Market: 101 S. La Cañada Drive, Green Valley, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Wednesday (490-3315). Marana Farmers’ Market: 13395 N. Marana Main Street, Marana, 3 to 6 p.m., Tuesday (882-3313). Metal Arts Village Saturday Morning Market: 3230 N. Dodge Blvd., 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday (795-1770). Oracle Farmers’ Market: 2805 N. Triangle L Ranch Road, 9 a.m. to noon, Saturday (896-2123).

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CLOSING SOON

(con)text

Find fantastic Frida items on sale at the Museum Store.

Café a la C’Art NOW OPEN ON WEEKENDS! Serving breakfast and lunch, 7 days a week.

Enjoy a lovely day at TMA. Tucson Museum of Art, connecting art to life!

Follow the conversation.

Nickolas Muray, Frida on White Bench, New York, 1939, inkjet print, ©Nickolas Muray Archives, Alta, Utah MAY 17 – 23, 2012

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Oro Valley Farmers’ Market: Town Hall at the corner of La Cañada Drive and Naranja Road, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (882-2157). Plaza Palomino: 2970 N. Swan Road, winter: 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday; summer: 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (plazapalomino.com). Rincon Valley Farmers’ and Artisans’ Market: 12500 E. Old Spanish Trail, winter: 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday; summer: 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (591-2276). St. David Farmers’ Market: St. David High School, 70 E. Patton St., St. David, 9 a.m. to noon, Saturday, May through October (520-221-1074). St. Philip’s Plaza Saturday Farmers’ Market: St. Philip’s Plaza, southeast corner of River Road and Campbell Avenue, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (603-8116). Santa Cruz River Farmers’ Market: Mercado San Agustín, 100 S. Avenida del Convento, 4 to 7 p.m., Thursday (622-0525). San Manuel Farmers’ Market: 801 McNab Parkway, 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday (520-212-2337). Sierra Vista Farmers’ Market: corner of Carmichael Avenue and Willcox Drive, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Thursday; and corner of Charleston Road and Highway 90 bypass, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday (520678-2638). Sunsites Farmers’ Market: Shadow Mountain Golf Course, 1105 Irene St., Sunsites, 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday (520-826-1250). Tucson Farmers’ Market: St. Philip’s Plaza, southeast corner of River Road and Campbell Avenue, winter: 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Sunday; summer: 8 a.m. to noon, Sunday (882-2157). Tucson Farmers’ Market at Jesse Owens Park: Jesse Owens Park, 400 S. Sarnoff Drive, winter: 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Friday; summer: 8 a.m. to noon, Friday (918-9811). Tucson Farmers’ Market at Maynards: Maynards Market and Kitchen, 400 N. Toole Ave., winter: 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday; summer: 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday (5450577). Tucson’s Green Art and Farmers’ Market: 8995 E. Tanque Verde Road, 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (9822645). Ventana Plaza’s Farmers’ Market: 5455 N. Kolb Road, 3 to 7 p.m., Tuesday (603-8116).

BUSINESS & FINANCE EVENTS THIS WEEK INDIVIDUAL JOB COUNSELING Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. A job counselor from Career Services Unlimited provides free, one-on-one career counseling about resume writing, choosing a career, updating interviewing skills, networking and job-search skills from noon to 3 p.m., Monday, May 21, and 9 a.m. to noon, Thursday, May 31; free.

INFORMATION POWER FOR SMALL BUSINESS Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. Discover sources for locating suppliers and competitors, identifying potential customers and tracking industry trends from 10:15 to 11:45 a.m., Saturday, May 19; free. Registration is required. Call 791-4010 to register and for more information.

NAWBO MEMBER CONNECTION BREAKFAST Radisson Suites Hotel. 6555 E. Speedway Blvd. 7217100. Bobbi Still of Affinity for Design presents “The Design Doctor” at a breakfast meeting from 8 to 10 a.m., Tuesday, May 22; $26, $21 member. Guests bring their advertising materials for her input. Call 326-2926, or visit nawbotucson.org for more information and to register.

NAWBO MONTHLY MIXER Karp and Weiss Law Firm. 3060 N. Swan Road. 3254200. An informal networking event with women business owners takes place from 4 to 7 p.m., the third Thursday of every month; free. Preregistration is requested; call 326-2926, or visit www.nawbotucson.org to register and for more information.

RESOURCE EXCHANGE MEETING Old Pueblo Grille. 60 N. Alvernon Way. 326-6000. A women’s professional and social group hosts networking and a speaker at 5:30 p.m., the third Thursday of every month; free admission, no-host refreshments from the menu. Call 906-4005 for information.

ANNOUNCEMENTS GLBT CHAMBER OF COMMERCE Manning House. 450 W. Paseo Redondo. 770-0714.

Any member of the GLBT community who is engaged in business or works with businesses is invited to a networking breakfast from 7:30 to 9 a.m., the third Thursday every month; $30, $25 member, $5 less if a reservation is made by the Monday prior. Call or visit tucsonglbtchamber.org for reservations or more info.

INTEGRATIVE WELLNESS COALITION BREAKFAST Tucson Osteopathic Medical Foundation. 3182 N. Swan Road. 299-4545. Holistic health-and-wellness practi-

22 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

tioners meet for breakfast and a program from 7:45 to 10 a.m., the fourth Tuesday of every month; $25, $20 member, $5 discount with pre-registration. Call 3220832 to pre-register or for more information.

JOB-SEEKERS’ GATHERING Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. Former executive recruiter Beth Cole facilitates a gathering for adult job-seekers from 3 to 4 p.m., every Friday; free.

FILM

THE GREAT XERISCAPE Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 742-6455.

A presentation and tour exploring how to use native and arid-adapted plants in water-saving landscapes take place at 10 a.m., the third Saturday of every month; $8, $6 senior, $5 active military, $4 student with valid ID, $2 ages 5 through 12, free member or child younger than 5, includes admission to the park. Visit tohonochulpark.org for more information.

NATIVE SEEDS/SEARCH SALON Native Seeds/SEARCH Retail Store. 3061 N. Campbell Ave. 622-5561. A gathering of gardeners and cooks meets from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m., the third Monday of every month; free, including samples. Visit nativeseeds. org for more information.

EVENTS THIS WEEK FOR THE BENEFIT OF ALL BEINGS ...

Loft Cinema. 3233 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-7777.

A screening of For the Benefit of All Beings: The Extraordinary Life of His Eminence Garchen Triptrul Rinpoche takes place at 7 p.m., Wednesday, May 23, to benefit the Southwest Buddhafield Endowment Fund; $10.

FOX TUCSON THEATRE Fox Tucson Theatre. 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515.

Saturday, May 19, at 7:30 p.m.; and Sunday, May 20, at 2 p.m.: Star Wars: The Clone Wars; $5 to $7.

LOFT CINEMA SPECIAL EVENTS Loft Cinema. 3233 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-7777.

Thursday, May 17, at 7:30 p.m., a restoration of the 1902 science-fiction film A Trip to the Moon is presented in its original colors, followed by a screening of The Extraordinary Voyage, a documentary about the discovery and restoration of A Trip to the Moon; $5 to $9. The Killer is screened at 7 p.m., Tuesday, May 22, as part of the Loft’s Essential Cinema series; $5 suggested donation. Visit loftcinema.com for a complete list of forthcoming films and to reserve tickets.

THE ROCKY HORROR SHOW Loft Cinema. 3233 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-7777. The Rocky Horror Picture Show screens at midnight on the third Saturday of every month with Heavy Petting as the shadow cast; $6, $5 member. The film deals with mature subject matter and is not recommended for the easily offended. No one under 17 is admitted; ID required.

STARS UNDER THE STARS Loews Ventana Canyon Resort. 7000 N. Resort Drive.

299-2020. Movie musicals are featured at 8:30 p.m., Fridays, through June 8. May 18: Grease (1978). June 1: Strictly Ballroom (1992). June 8: The Wizard of Oz (1939). Call the concierge for more information.

CHERYL HAWORTH: STRONG! Weightlifter Cheryl Haworth struggles to defend her champion status in a one-hour documentary that screens at 3:30 p.m., Saturday, May 19, at Miller-Golf Links Library, 9640 E. Golf Links Road; free. Call 7914010 for more information.

GARDENING EVENTS THIS WEEK BIRDS AND GARDENING TOUR Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. A 45-minute tour explores the plants and gardening practices that attract birds to home gardens, and identifies birds frequently seen in the Botanical Gardens and urban Tucson, at 10 a.m., the first and fourth Wednesday of every month; $8, $4 child age 4 to 12, free younger child or member, includes admission to the gardens. Call or visit tucsonbotanical. org for more information.

BUTTERFLY WALK Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. A 45-minute tour identifies butterflies common to urban Tucson, and explores the plants and gardening practices that attract butterflies to the home garden, at 11 a.m., the third Thursday of every month; $8, $4 child age 4 to 12, free younger child or member, includes admission to the gardens. Call or visit tucsonbotanical.org for more information.

DESERT HORTICULTURE CONFERENCE Casino del Sol. 5655 W. Valencia Road. (800) 3449435. A conference for landscape architects, designers, growers, retailers, contractors, maintenance personnel, suppliers, educators and aspiring green-industry professionals takes place from 7 a.m. to 3:30 p.m., Friday, May 18; $100. Four concurrent sessions are offered, and continuing-education credits for several professional disciplines are available. Visit ag.arizona.edu/deserthort to register and for more information.

ANNOUNCEMENTS CLASSES AT TUCSON BOTANICAL GARDENS Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. The gardens frequently offer classes on a wide range of gardening and related topics, including photography, painting and fauna that frequent Tucson gardens; $10 to $35, or free with admission. Call or visit tucsonbotanical.org for more information.

GARDENING CLASSES AT THE LIBRARY Master Gardeners from the Pima County Cooperative Extension Service conduct free classes the first Saturday of every month, at 10:30 a.m., Mission Branch, 3770 S. Mission Road; and every Wednesday at 1 p.m., at the Murphy-Wilmot Branch, 530 N. Wilmot Road. Visit ag.arizona.edu for more information.

GUIDED TOURS OF TUCSON BOTANICAL GARDENS Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. Plant trivia, history of the gardens and introductions to native flora are featured on a guided tour at 10 a.m., every Friday, through May 25; $8, $4 age 4 to 12, free younger child or member, includes admission to the gardens. Call or visit tucsonbotanical. org for more information.

ORGANIC GARDENERS COMPOSTING EXHIBIT Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 326-9686, ext. 10. Tucson Organic Gardeners members answer questions in the composting-demonstration area from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., every Saturday, through May 26; $8, $4 age 4 to 12, free younger child or member, includes admission to the gardens. Call or visit tucsonbotanical.org for more information.

PLANT LOW-COST TREES FOR ENERGY EFFICIENCY Customers of Tucson Electric Power Company qualify for native shade trees to plant within 15 feet of their homes on the west, south or east side. Trees are $8 including delivery. Call 791-3109, or visit tucsonaz.gov/tcb/tft for more information.

HEALTH EVENTS THIS WEEK CHAIR YOGA UA Thomas W. Keating Bioresearch Building. 1657 E. Helen St. People of all ages, including those with arthritis and other health issues, benefit from a gentle form of yoga practiced while seated or leaning on a chair, from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m., Saturday, May 19; free. Call 626-5040, or email livinghealthy@arthritis.arizona.edu to register.

TMC SENIOR SERVICES TMC Senior Services. 1400 N. Wilmot Road. 324-1960.

Classes are free and take place at the TMC Senior Resource Center. Advance registration is required; call 324-4345 to register. Brain Week takes place through Friday, May 18; free. Thursday, May 17, from 9:30 to 10:30 a.m., Dr. Abhay Sanan presents “Brain Tumors: Diagnosis and Treatment Options”; and from 1 to 2:30 p.m., Dr. Brian Callahan presents “Normal Pressure Hydrocephalus: A Reversible Cause of Dementia.”

Friday, May 18, from 11 a.m. to noon, Terri Waldman presents “New to Memory Loss and Alzheimer’s Disease”; and from 1 to 3 p.m., Cynthia A. Holmes and others from the American Parkinson Disease Association present “New to Parkinson’s Disease.”

UPCOMING TMC SENIOR SERVICES TMC Senior Services. 1400 N. Wilmot Road. 3241960. Classes are free and take place at the TMC Senior Resource Center. Advance registration is required; call 324-4345 to register. Thursday, May 24, from 1 to 2:30 p.m., What Happens in a Cardiac Catheterization Lab. Wednesday, May 30, from 10 a.m. to noon, Fit at 50 and Beyond.

ANNOUNCEMENTS ALZHEIMER’S SUPPORT GROUPS All meetings are free; call for reservations. Family members and others caring for people with dementia gather for discussion, education and support from 1:30 to 3 p.m., the first and third Tuesday of every month, at the Oro Valley Public Library, 1305 W. Naranja Drive, 2295300. An Alzheimer’s Association Support Group meets at 4:30 p.m., the second Monday of every month, at Santa Catalina Villas retirement community, 7500 N. Calle Sin Envidia, 730-3132. An Alzheimer’s caregiver support group and concurrent activity group for those with the disease meet from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m., the second and fourth Tuesday every month, at TMC’s El Dorado Campus, 1400 N. Wilmot Road, 324-1960. A second Alzheimer’s caregiver group meets there from 10:30 to noon, the first and third Thursday.

CURVES LAUGHTER YOG-HA CLUB Curves. 2816 N. Campbell Ave. 326-1251. Men, women and children laugh for well-being from 5:30 to 6:30 p.m., every Sunday; freewill donation. Call Judy at 822-8278, or visit laughteryogawithgita.com.

FREE HEALTH SCREENINGS Radiant Research. 7840 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 140.

885-6793. Free screenings for cholesterol, blood sugar, gout and BMI are offered from 7:30 to 11:30 a.m., every Wednesday. Call to schedule a screening.

HIV TESTING The Centers for Disease Control recommend HIV testing for all people ages 13 through 64. Visit napwa.org for more information on AIDS testing and its benefits.

Testing hours at SAAF, 375 S. Euclid Ave., are from 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., every Monday and Wednesday; and 1 to 8 p.m., Tuesday and Thursday. Walk-in testing is also available at COPE, 101 S. Stone Ave., from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., Monday through Friday. All testing is confidential; results are available in about 15 minutes; and counseling is available. Call for an appointment.

PCAP: AFFORDABLE MEDICAL SOLUTIONS FOR PIMA COUNTY RESIDENTS A representative from the Pima Community Access Program, a service that links uninsured Pima County residents with an affordable and comprehensive network of health-care providers, is available by appointment to enroll members of the community and give a free assessment. Call 309-2931, or email susa@mypcap.org.

KIDS & FAMILIES EVENTS THIS WEEK ALL TOGETHER THEATRE Live Theatre Workshop. 5317 E. Speedway Blvd. 3274242. An original adaptation of Thumbelina opens Sunday, May 20, and continues through Sunday, June 10. Showtime is 1 p.m., every Sunday; $5 to $8. Call or visit livetheatreworkshop.org for reservations.

ALLEGRO SCHOOL OF MUSIC UA Holsclaw Recital Hall. 1017 N. Olive Road. 6211162. Students perform a variety of musical styles on guitar, piano, voice, violin, bass and drums from 11 a.m. to 6 p.m., Sunday, May 20; free. Food donations for the Community Food Bank are accepted at the concert, and through Thursday, May 31, at Allegro School of Music, 4641 N. First Ave., No. 5. Those who donate food are eligible for a raffle for a free month of music lessons. Call 670-9162 for more information.

THE BEST OF STORIES THAT SOAR Temple of Music and Art. 330 S. Scott Ave. 884-4875.

Audience favorites are performed at 4 and 6:30 p.m., Sunday, May 20; $10, $5 child. Each show features different characters, music, comedy, drama and acrobatics.

A celebration of the shows’ young authors takes place between them. Call 882-8006 for more information.

BRIDGING GENERATIONS: PICNIC AND WHEAT-PASTING CELEBRATION Armory Park Center. 220 S. Fifth Ave. 791-4865. Wear play-clothes and help wheat-paste photographs into a mural outside the Armory Park Senior Center, from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday, May 19; free. Food, refreshments, music and other activities take place inside the center. Call (503) 201-5011 for more information.

CHRISTIAN YOUTH THEATER UA Crowder Hall. 1020 E. University Blvd. 621-1162.

Seussical, a family musical based on Dr. Seuss books, continues through Sunday, May 20. Showtimes are 7 p.m., Friday and Saturday, and 2 p.m., Sunday; $12.

Call 370-4000, or visit cyttucson.org for tickets.

FAMILY BIRDING WALK Agua Caliente Regional Park. 12325 E. Roger Road.

877-6000. Families explore the shaded trails at Agua

Caliente Park looking for Gila woodpeckers, curve-billed thrashers, hummingbirds, wetland birds and raptors from 8 to 9 a.m., Saturday, May 19; free. Call 6157855, or email eeducation@pima.gov for more information. Reservations are not required.

FOSTER CARE APPRECIATION MONTH Underwear and socks for children living with foster families are collected at all Tucson Walgreens stores through Thursday, May 31. Donations are distributed by Aviva Children’s services. Call 327-6779 for more information.

MAGIC TREE HOUSE BOOK CLUB Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive.

229-5300. Fans of the Magic Tree House books by Mary Pope Osborne meet from 4 to 5 p.m., the third Thursday of every month, to discuss a different title and enjoy activities, crafts and discussion; free. The club is for ages 6 to 10; registration is required.

NATURE STORIES AT AGUA CALIENTE PARK Agua Caliente Regional Park. 12325 E. Roger Road.

877-6000. A story-reading and craft activity about the natural world take place from 10 to 11 a.m., Friday, May 18; free. Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov for more information. Pima County Natural Resources and the Tucson Audubon Society co-sponsor the event.

REPTILE RAMBLE Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 742-6455.

Docents present characteristics of snakes and lizards, how to tell the difference between species, and the roles each serves in the Sonoran Desert, during an interactive presentation and walk at 10 a.m., every Friday, through July 27; $8, $6 senior, $5 active military, $4 student with ID, $2 child age 5 to 12, free member or child younger than 5, includes admission to the park. Call or visit tohonochulpark.org for information.

SMARTY PANTS Tucson Museum of Art. 140 N. Main Ave. 624-2333.

Children age 3 and 4 and their adult companions collaborate in hands-on art-making inspired by the current exhibition in the museum, at 10 a.m., the third Saturday of every month; $10 child, $8 member, includes admission to the museum. May 19: Create watercolor and cyanotype landscapes inspired by the museum’s Western art collection.

SUMMER SAFARI NIGHTS Reid Park Zoo. 1030 S. Randolph Way. 881-4753. The zoo stays open from 5 to 10 p.m., every Friday, through

July 6; $7.50, $5 child, free younger than 2. Games, crafts and face-painting are included. Visit tucsonzoo. org for more information.

TEEN ADVISORY BOARD Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. TAB, the teen advisory board, shares ideas and plans teen events for the library, from 3 to 4 p.m., the third Saturday of every month, except holidays; free.

TUCSON’S RIVER OF WORDS YOUTH POETRY AND ART TRAVELING EXHIBIT An exhibit of children’s poetry and art expressing their understanding of watersheds opens Thursday, May 17, and continues through Tuesday, June 19, at the Martha Cooper Branch Library, 1377 N. Catalina Ave.; free.

Hours are 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 5 p.m., Sunday; free. Call 615-7855, or e-mail eeducation@pima.gov for more information.

DATING

VIDEO-GAME CHALLENGE Bookmans. 6230 E. Speedway Blvd. 748-9555. Kids age 12 and younger play Mario Kart on a Wii, and older participants play Dance Central 2, competing for $500 in trade prizes, from noon to 4 p.m., Saturday, May 19; free.

WELCOME THE RETURNING BATS Barbea Williams Performing Company performs a “Bat Dance” with students of Rio Vista Elementary School and special musical guests at 6 p.m., Saturday, May 19, in the Rillito riverbed east of the Campbell Avenue bridge; free. Bat expert Yar Petryszyn shares his expertise, and entomologist Carl Olson speaks about the insects bats eat. The program is timed to end as the bats fly out from under the bridge. Bring a flashlight, drinking water and a blanket to sit on. Access the site via the ramp located on the southeast side of the bridge.

UPCOMING MODEL-BUILDING FOR KIDS Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. A local club of dedicated model-builders provide children ages 6 and older their choice of a model airplane or a model car to build with expert help from 10 a.m. to noon, Saturday, May 26. Registration is required.

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KIDS & FAMILIES THE GAME IS ON .

bounce back from adversity, from 6 to 8 p.m., Friday, May 18; free. Call 399-6300 for more information.

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OUTDOOR FAMILY DAY: ALL ABOUT PALMS Agua Caliente Regional Park. 12325 E. Roger Road.

877-6000. Children ages 5 through 12 and their families learn the natural history of the parkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s palm trees and how animals use them, from 9:30 to 11:30 a.m., Saturday, May 26; free. A craft activity using palm parts is included. Reservations are required.

Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov to RSVP. SUMMER READING PROGRAM KICKOFF Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive.

229-5300. Crafts, activities, prize-drawings, snacks and other activities are featured from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., Thursday, May 24, at the kickoff to the libraryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s drop-in summer reading program; free

OUTDOORS EVENTS THIS WEEK

SERIES 2

BIRDS AND BEER SOCIAL Sky Bar. 536 N. Fourth Ave. 622-4300. Gather with other birders to share photos, stories, gear info and identification tips from 5 to 7 p.m., the third Thursday of every month; free. Beverages and pizza are available for purchase.

SONORAN DESERT WEEDWACKERS Tucson Mountain Park. 2020 N. Kinney Road. 8776000. Volunteers age 12 and older help remove buffelgrass and fountain grass from 7 to 10 a.m., every second and fourth Wednesday; and every third Saturday; free. Work may require hiking and working on steep slopes. Meeting locations are in Tucson Mountain Park. Details are given with RSVP, which is required. Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima. gov to RSVP.

OUT OF TOWN

complete program schedules available at azpm.org

HUMMINGBIRD BANDING San Pedro House. 9800 Highway 90. Sierra Vista.

(520) 508-4445. Staff and volunteers from the Southeastern Arizona Bird Observatory capture, band, measure and release 10 species of hummingbirds as part of a long-term study of an internationally important migration route, from 4 to 6 p.m., Sunday, May 20; free. Call (520) 417-6960, or visit sabo.org to register and for more information.

TREE TOUR Boyce Thompson Arboretum. Highway 60. Superior.

(520) 689-2811. Certified arborist Jeff Payne leads a tour of the forested areas of the arboretum at 8:30 a.m., the third Sunday every month; $9, $4.50 ages 5 through 12, free younger child, includes admission. Visit azstateparks.com for a video tour.

SPIRITUALITY

SPORTS EVENTS THIS WEEK AZ BLISTER WAKA KICKBALL Joaquin Murrieta Park. 1400 N. Silverbell Road. 7914752. Friday, May 18, at 7 p.m. is the registration deadline for teams with at least 18 players; $70 per per player. Free agents may be placed at this time. A rules clinic and pickup game takes place at 7 p.m., Thursday, May 31; and the seasonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s first games are at 7 p.m., Thursday, June 7 and 14. Thursday, June 14 is the last day to register. Games continue at 7 p.m., every Thursday, through Aug. 2, except July 5. Playoff games are held at 7 p.m., Thursday, Aug. 9 and 16. Visit kickball.com for more information.

DANGEROUSLY INTENSE WRESTLING Dunbar Cultural Center. 325 W. Second St. 791-7795.

Professional wrestling is presented at 6:30 p.m., Friday, May 18; $8, free child 10 and younger. Visit facebook. com/diwarizona for more information.

SENIOR NATIONAL BADMINTON TOURNAMENT UA Student Recreation Center. 1400 E. Sixth St. More than 100 top players age 35 and older compete for the national championship from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m., Thursday through Saturday, May 17 through 19; and from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Sunday, May 20; free spectator. Each day features singles, doubles and mixed doubles events.

Call 405-9311, or search â&#x20AC;&#x153;Badminton Tucsonâ&#x20AC;? on Facebook for more information.

TUCSON PADRES Kino Veterans Memorial Stadium. 2500 E. Ajo Way. 434-1021. Thursday through Sunday, May 17 through 20: Nashville. Monday through Thursday, May 21 through 24: Memphis. Tuesday through Friday, May 29 through June 1: Las Vegas. Thursday through Sunday, June 7 through 10: Reno. Games start at 7:05 p.m., except Sunday at 2:05 p.m.; $7, $10 box seats, $15 premiere seats. Call 434-1367, or visit tucsonpadres. com for tickets or more information.

WINGS FOR WOMEN GOLF TOURNAMENT Golf Club at Vistoso. 955 W. Vistoso Highlands Drive. A golf tournament followed by a silent auction helps fund an organization that provides social services to homeless women and children, at 7 a.m., Saturday, May 19; $100, $350 four-person scramble team. Email info@ wingsforwomentucson.org, or visit wingsforwomentucson. org to register and for more information.

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EVENTS THIS WEEK

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TIES SPEAKER SERIES Unity of Tucson. 3617 N. Camino Blanco. 577-3300.

Speakers discuss their near-death experiences at 6:30 p.m., the second and third Thursday every month; $5 suggested donation. Call 395-2365, or email ties@ spiritual-explorations.com for more information.

CAPITALIZING ON ADVERSITY Caritas Center for Healing. 330 E. 16th St. 9400486. A workshop uses art, visualization, writing and discussion to explore coping strategies and ways to

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Wednesday and Friday from 4PM-7PM

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24 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

PERFORMING ARTS Two Tucson women will debut plays in Scottsdale, thanks to the Arizona Women’s Theatre Company

Brand-New Works

BY SHERILYN FORRESTER, sforrester@tucsonweekly.com s writers go, playwrights are a curious lot.

Sure, they sit alone in their garrets—or whatever the modern equivalent is—transforming ideas into words just like poets, essayists and other creative writers. But stringing some good dialogue together is only part of the process. These words need actors, a director, a stage of some sort, and maybe even a costume or two, before they really exist.

Up the road in that other sunny valley—the Phoenix area—there is a group that has been nurturing playwrights for several years now.

The Arizona Women’s Theatre Company, or AZWTC, specializes in plays by women. The group’s upcoming Pandora Festival, which showcases staged readings of scripts chosen from submissions to its contest, is now in its sixth season.

This year, two Tucson playwrights are represented: Mary Caroline Rogers and Esther Blumenfeld. They represent different generations and quite different styles of dramatic work. This is the fifth time Rogers will be represented in the festival; it’s the first for Blumenfeld.

AZWTC president Joy Bingham Strimple says the group was founded in 2003 “to provide an innovative forum for women’s voices,” chiefly by producing original plays by women. Fairly quickly, however, the group stopped being a typical presenting organization and decided to focus on giving women an opportunity to see their plays done as staged readings.

Although Strimple has been a member for years, she is new to a leadership role. “A couple of years ago, many of those who had been around for a while decided to move on, and there were essentially three of us left standing.

But we were determined to keep things going.”

A

Her leadership cohorts are Susan Assadi and Pamela Sterling.

The festival takes place over three days at the Scottsdale Center for the Performing Arts. “We seek submissions in three categories: 10-minute plays, one-act plays and full-length plays,” Strimple says. The shorts are done Friday night; one of the full-length plays is presented Saturday afternoon; the one-acts are done Saturday night; and the final full-length play is done Sunday afternoon.

Rogers, the five-time honoree, moved to Tucson in the early 1990s. She said she was living in the Dallas area and found herself at loose ends. “I called my parents, and they told me they were retiring and moving to Tucson. I said, ‘Oh, that sounds good.’ They were not pleased.

I’m sure they thought, ‘Great, we get to bail her out again.’”

Rogers studied theater at Goucher College and Towson State University and had done some film work after college. “But I’d always been interested in writing,” she says. “My father helped me submit my first play to a contest when I was 12, and I was a finalist.”

Rogers also is an actress, and “at the time, the film and television industry was very alive in Tucson,” she says. She managed to find work in numerous projects, including The Young Riders, a TV series about the Pony Express starring Stephen Baldwin and Josh Brolin. She also studied at the Magaw Studio and met some folks who were interested in doing new plays.

“We created a small theater company, Indigo Playworks, and we did several of my plays there. OPP (Old Pueblo Playwrights) was also just starting up, with folks like Howard Allen and Patrick Baliani, and I was involved there, as well.”

But the film work started to fade, so she

Esther Blumenfeld began substitute-teaching in local schools.

She found she liked teaching, and since 2001 has taught fifth-grade at Holladay Magnet Elementary School.

Besides her shows at Pandora, Rogers has been a finalist in numerous national competitions. She has had readings or full productions most recently at the Vortex Theatre in Albuquerque, N.M., and the Actors’ Theatre of Santa Cruz, Calif.

Her Pandora play this year, The Memory of Us, is in the 10-minute category. “These 10-minute shorts are very popular now in contests across the country,” she says. “My rules are: You have two characters; you establish the conflict immediately; and you hope your audience talks about what happens for a lot longer than 10 minutes afterward.”

Blumenfeld, who retired with her husband from Atlanta to Tucson 17 years ago, has been a writer—she characterizes herself as a humorist—for most of her life. She’s authored seven books and dozens of articles. But she had never written plays. She began experimenting with the genre after her husband died.

“Our retirement didn’t quite go as planned,” she says a bit wryly. But her playwright experiment was impressive.

Her first play, Here and There, was produced by the Detroit Repertory Theatre, a professional theater company affiliated with the Actors’ Equity Association. It was a full production, part of the Detroit Repertory’s season in 2003.

So she decided to try her hand again and wrote Under Midwestern Stars. This time, the

Mary Caroline Rogers

The Pandora Festival of New Works 2012 Presented by the Arizona Women’s Theatre Company 7 p.m., Friday, May 18; 2 and 7 p.m., Saturday, May 19; 2 p.m., Sunday, May 20 Scottsdale Center for the Performing Arts 7380 E. Second St., Scottsdale $12 per show (480) 499-8587; www.azwtc.org

Kansas City Repertory Theatre—another big, professional, regional theater—included it in the main stage season in 2007. “This was a half-million dollar production in a theater that seats 680 people!”

Of her success, she says, “I’ve learned how to work really hard to make it look really easy.”

Now, her third play has been chosen for a staged reading at the Pandora Festival.

Blumenfeld says that although her plays are full of humor, they are not drawing-room comedies. She says she tries to ask questions, using comedy to explore serious subjects: Is anyone listening? What role does time play? What constitutes a relationship?

Blumenfeld says she is “delighted to get to see my play” at the Pandora Festival. “And I’m so glad that this festival exists. It’s still tough for women. I would say: Young writers, keep at it.

Keep rewriting. Keep sending your work.”

And maybe, like Blumenfeld, you might be given a grand embrace.

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DANCE OPENING THIS WEEK CONTRA DANCING First United Methodist Church. 915 E. Fourth St. 6226481. Live music, callers and an alcohol- and smokefree environment are provided for contra-dancing at 7 p.m., the first, third and fourth Saturday each month; $8. An introductory lesson takes place at 6:30 p.m.; dancing begins at 7 p.m. Call 325-1902, or visit tftm. org for more information.

ECSTATIC DANCE TUCSON Rhythm Industry Performance Factory. 1013 S. Tyndall Ave. 481-8003. Participants express themselves with dance, and have fun in an alcohol-, drug- and judgmentfree environment, at 7:30 p.m., the third Saturday of every month; $7 suggested donation, free child. Call 229-6247 for more information.

FREE DANCE DAY BreakOut Studios. 522 N. Fourth Ave. 670-1301. A variety of dance and fitness classes are free from 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Saturday, May 19; free.

FREE ZUMBA CLASS Bookmans. 3733 W. Ina Road. 579-0303. Instructor Leslie Lundquist leads a workout for all skill levels, from 9:30 to 10:30 a.m., every Thursday; free.

MUSIC EVENTS THIS WEEK 17TH STREET MUSIC 17th Street Music. 810 E. 17th St. 624-8821, ext.

7147. All programs are free. Saturday, May 19, 2 to 4 p.m.: a vocal workshop featuring the Sonoran Dogs, a super-group of award-winning bluegrass musicians.

Saturday, May 26, noon to 2 p.m.: Smallvox, five-piece electric folk-rock. Visit seventeenthstreetmarket.com for more information.

AVA: ANSELMO VALENCIA TORI AMPHITHEATER AVA: Anselmo Valencia Tori Amphitheater. Casino del Sol, 5655 W. Valencia Road. (800) 344-9435.

Saturday, May 19, at 10 a.m.: Noche de las Estrellas with Genesis Codina and Mariachi Tesoro de Tucson; $15; advance tickets are available at Sunnyside High School. Visit casinodelsol.com for tickets or more info.

Welcome to

BENEFIT FOR LPFM COMMUNITY RADIO La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar. 201 N. Court Ave. 622-0351. Holy Rolling Empire, Blind Divine and The Wolfgang perform at 10 p.m., Friday, May 18; $5. Proceeds benefit LPFM Community Radio. Call 8203482 for more information.

DARWIN AND EVOLUTION St. Francis in the Foothills Church. 4625 E. River Road.

299-9063. La Vita Bella, a concert including music, dance, magic and comedy, takes place from 3 to 6 p.m., Sunday, May 20; $15. Pizza and a beverage are available for $5. Proceeds support a trip by Darwin Hall to sing in St. Peter’s Basilica, the Vatican, with the Sons of Orpheus. Additional performers include Joe Bourne with members of the Motown Revue, Dean and Anna Schoff, and Joey Rogers with Dancing in the Streets.

Melinda Nay emcees. Email darwinwh@gmail.com for more information.

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FRANCISCO RENTERIA AND FRIENDS Grace St. Paul’s Episcopal Church. 2331 E. Adams St. 327-6857. Instrumental music, sacred music and opera’s greatest hits are featured at a concert to raise money for medical expenses, from 3 to 5 p.m., Sunday, May 20; freewill donation.

GASLIGHT THEATRE FAMILY CONCERTS The Gaslight Theatre. 7010 E. Broadway Blvd. 8869428. Concerts are at 7 p.m., Monday; $12 to $22.

May 21: The Retro Rockets. Visit thegaslighttheatre.com for tickets and more info.

MAIN GATE SQUARE SUMMER CONCERT SERIES Geronimo Plaza. 820 E. University Blvd. Free jazz concerts take place at 7 p.m., the first and third Friday, monthly, through August. May 18: De Grazia Band, Spanish guitar. June 1: Sylvan Street, jazz. June 15: Diane Van Deurzen and Lisa Otey, piano and vocals. July 6: Cool Breeze, jazz. July 20: Kelland Thomas, saxophone. Aug. 3: Crystal Stark, vocals. Aug. 17: Sonoran Soul, fusion. Visit saaca.org for more information.

RANCHO MISTERIOSO CONCERT Valencia Branch, Pima County Public Library. 202 W. Valencia Road. 594-5390. Songs and stories of the southwest are featured from 6 to 7:25 p.m., Wednesday, May 23; free.

SOUTHERN ARIZONA SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA A concert featuring Isaac’s Patriotic Overture and Bottesini’s Concerto for Double Bass takes place at 7:30 p.m., Saturday, May 19, at SaddleBrooke Desert View Performing Arts Center, 39900 S. Clubhouse Drive; and 3 p.m., Sunday, May 20, at St. Andrew’s Presbyterian Church, 7575 N. Paseo del Norte; $23, $21 advance.

Visit sasomusic.org for tickets or more information.

OUT OF TOWN FOR THE LOVE OF MUSIC Bisbee Women’s Club. 7 Ledge Ave. Bisbee. (520) 4323204. Duo Morpheus, a piano and viola duo, perform at 8 p.m., Saturday, May 19; and 3 p.m., Sunday, May 20; $10. Call (520) 432-7217, or visit artentree.net for more information.

LOS PINGUOS Tubac Plaza. 14 Will Rogers Lane. Tubac. 398-9409.

Los Angeles Latin-music band Los Pinguos performs at 7 p.m., Saturday, May 19; $19, $9.50 ages 12 to 17, free age 11 and younger. Call 398-2542 for more information.

BEOWULF ALLEY’S OLD TIME RADIO THEATRE Beowulf Alley Theatre Company. 11 S. Sixth Ave. 8820555. A reading of radio scripts from the ’30s, ’40s and ’50s takes place at 7 p.m., the first and third Tuesday of every month; $10, $5 ages 4 through 12. Call or visit beowulfalley.org for script titles and information.

THE GASLIGHT THEATRE The Gaslight Theatre. 7010 E. Broadway Blvd. 8869428. The French farce The Three Musketeers runs through Sunday, June 3. Showtimes are 7 p.m., Tuesday through Thursday; 6 and 8:30 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and 3 and 7 p.m., Sunday; $17.95, $7.95 child age 12 and younger, $15.95 student, military and senior. Visit thegaslighttheatre.com for reservations or more information.

LAUGHING LIBERALLY The Auld Dubliner. 800 E. University Blvd. 206-0323.

A showcase of political comedy featuring Phil Gordon and a changing cast of other Tucson comedians takes place at 7 p.m., the third Thursday of every month; free admission. Visit livingliberally.com, or email petgordon@ comcast.net for more information and to sign up to perform.

ORO VALLEY CONCERTS Oro Valley Marketplace. Oracle and Tangerine roads. Oro Valley. Concerts take place at 6 p.m., the third Thursday of every month; free. Guests may bring chairs. May 17: Retro Swing 7, classic swing and jazz. June 21: the Guilty Bystanders, Americana.

LIVE THEATRE WORKSHOP Live Theatre Workshop. 5317 E. Speedway Blvd. 3274242. The Cocktail Hour continues through Sunday, June 3. Showtimes are 7:30 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and 3 p.m., Sunday; $18, $16 student, senior or military. Call or visit livetheatreworkshop.org for tickets and more information.

UPCOMING

RED BARN THEATRE Red Barn Theatre. 948 N. Main Ave. 622-6973. Mame continues through Sunday, June 3. Showtimes are 7:30 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and 2 p.m., Sunday; $16, $10 Friday, $13 senior, student or military. Call or visit theredbarntheater.com for more information.

ARTS EXPRESS CHOIR AND BRASS QUINTET UA Crowder Hall. 1020 E. University Blvd. 621-1162.

A Hero’s Salute, a program recognizing the U.S. military, first responders, public servants and others who place the public’s safety above their own, takes place at 3 p.m., Monday, May 28; $5 requested donation.

Proceeds provide music scholarships. Call 319-0400, or visit arts-express.org for tickets and more information.

LAST CHANCE

SONS OF ORPHEUS The chorus presents several selections during a Memorial Day Veterans’ Service at 9 a.m., Monday, May 28, at East Lawn Palms Mortuary and Cemetery, 5801 E. Grant Road; free. Visit sonsoforpheus.org.

BROADWAY IN TUCSON Tucson Music Hall. 210 S. Church Ave. 791-4101.

Mary Poppins closes Sunday, May 20. Showtimes are 7:30 p.m., Thursday; 8 p.m., Friday; 2 and 8 p.m., Saturday; and 1 and 6:30 p.m., Sunday; $26 to $77 plus fees. Visit broadwayintucson.com for tickets and more information.

TUCSON JAZZ SOCIETY Loews Ventana Canyon Resort. 7000 N. Resort Drive.

299-2020. Guitarist and vocalist Nick Colionne performs at 7:30 p.m., Sunday, May 27; $35, $25 member, $20 military and student with ID, $140 VIP table seats for two with two-drink minimum, $100 VIP table member. Call (800) 234-5117 for VIP reservations; visit tucsonjazz.org for more information.

COMEDY PLAYHOUSE Comedy Playhouse. 3620 N. First Ave. 260-6442. The Comedy Genius of Don Marquis closes Sunday, May 20.

Showtimes are 7:30 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and 3 p.m., Sunday; $12, $10 senior and student. Call or visit thecomedyplayhouse.com for tickets or more info.

ANNOUNCEMENTS CALL FOR CHORAL MUSICIANS Tucson Symphony Center. 2175 N. Sixth Ave. 8828585. New members are sought for the Tucson Symphony Orchestra chorus. Auditions are Saturday, May 19. Call 668-3516 for an appointment. Rehearsals are from 7 to 9:30 p.m., every Monday, at the Symphony Center.

SHAPE-NOTE SINGING Sonora Cohousing Common House. 501 E. Roger Road. 404-1988. Shape-note singing from The Sacred Harp takes place from 2 to 5 p.m., the first and third Saturday of every month; free. Copies of The Sacred Harp are available for loan or purchase. Call 743-1268, or visit tucsonfasola.org for more information.

THEATER OPENING THIS WEEK LAFFS COMEDY SURVIVOR Laffs Comedy Caffé. 2900 E. Broadway Blvd. 3238669. Tucson comedians compete to survive another week at 8 p.m., every Thursday, through June 21. A comedian is eliminated each week. Finals are held Saturday, June 23, and the winner receives $500 and three professional bookings at Laffs. All rounds are televised on T-Town TV. Email garyhoodcomedy@hotmail. com to participate.

CONTINUING BEOWULF ALLEY THEATRE COMPANY Beowulf Alley Theatre Company. 11 S. Sixth Ave. 8820555. Sins of the Mother continues through Sunday, May 27. Showtimes are 7:30 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and 2:30 p.m., Sunday; $21. Call or visit beowulfalley. org for tickets and more information.

UPCOMING COMEDY PLAYHOUSE Comedy Playhouse. 3620 N. First Ave. 260-6442. The Mystery Genius of E.W. Hornung’s ‘Raffles the Amateur Cracksman’ opens Friday, May 25, and continues through Saturday, June 2. Showtimes are 7:30 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and 3 p.m., Sunday; $12, $10 senior and student. Call or visit thecomedyplayhouse. com for tickets or more information.

ANNOUNCEMENTS CALL FOR ACTORS Beowulf Alley Theatre Company. 11 S. Sixth Ave. 8820555. Actors are sought for the Sacred Chicken production of Steven Dietz’ Becky’s New Car. Auditions are by appointment only from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday, May 19, and callbacks are from 2 to 4 p.m. The production is staged in October. For an appointment, email carriekhill@gmail.com with “Becky Auditions” in the subject line.

CALL FOR ACTORS Invisible Theatre. 1400 N. First Ave. 882-9721.

Auditions are held for two shows for the company’s upcoming season, at 10 a.m., Saturday, May 19. The plays are Doug Curtis’ Mesa, and Ken Ludwig’s Fox on the Fairway. Actors bring a headshot and resume, and perform a 2-minute contemporary monologue. Call 8840672 to schedule an audition time.

MUSICAL COMEDY ACTORS SOUGHT Actors are sought for a musical comedy revue, Musical Mayhem Cabaret. Email a headshot and resume if available, a link to any online performances, and an expression of interest to danacianciotto@yahoo.com for info.

Find more @ .com

VISUAL ARTS Raices Taller’s annual ‘Mujeres’ show succeeds at reflecting on women’s lives

Eclectic Gathering

BY MARGARET REGAN, mregan@tucsonweekly.com smiling young woman, swathed in a frilly apron, holds aloft a can of SaniFlush.

“I never knew it was so easy,” she gushes, gesturing to a sparkling toilet she has just cleaned.

Another woman, equally cheerful, recounts how much her marriage has improved since she switched to Domestic cleanser.

“He loves me, he loves me a lot,” she says, pulling petals off a daisy, “since I got Domestic-ated.”

Don Draper couldn’t have said it better himself.

These old-timey illustrated advertisements are clipped from newspapers from the 1950s and 1960s. But if the real-life advertisers—and Mad Men’s imaginary Draper—didn’t use such sayings ironically, artist Pauline H. Pedregon does.

In her installation “I Am Woman,” a highlight of the Mujeres, Mujeres, Mujeres (Women, Women, Women) show at Raices Taller, Pedregon resurrects the clips to skewer the old idea that a woman’s worth depended on her domestic skills.

The offensive little ads are part of an elaborate work that serves as an altarpiece to the unsung women who did (and do) household tasks again and again.

An ironing board set up in the gallery is the counterpart of a church altar. An ancient iron sits on top, while an overloaded hamper stands nearby. A red garment spills out of the hamper, begging for the hot iron to smooth its wrinkles.

Above, a tangle of wooden hangers awaits an endless number of ironed shirts. They rise upward, glinting in the light like a painting of the apotheosis of the Virgin. But these hangers are hardly about assumption into heaven: They dangle from the ceiling by a slave’s chains, and their uncountable number bears witness to the numbing repetition of the job at hand.

At least the imaginary housewife who might have toiled away in this domestic prison could unleash her creativity in sewing. Nearby, she has an old-fashioned dressmaker’s mannequin—Our Lady of the Laundry, perhaps.

Pedregon has painted a cheerful polka-dotted fabric on the front and covered the back in dress patterns.

But even when a ’50s housewife found joy in caring for her home and family, or had fun making her own clothes, she dealt with a prevailing ethos that belittled both her labor and her intelligence. (One of the real contributions of Mad Men is its reminder of just how bad—

A

and how recent—the bad “old” days of overt sexism were.) Those demeaning newspaper ads about Domestic-ation are glued all over the woman’s treasured dress pattern, obscuring and undermining the things she enjoyed.

Pedregon stands up for our mothers and grandmothers, though, talking back to the Don Drapers who plagued them. Channeling the voice of Audre Lorde, she’s hand-inked statements by the poet all over the ads: “I am deliberate and afraid of nothing,” Lorde declares. And: “Revolution is not a onetime event.”

Amen to that. Progress has to be made again and again—it’s repetitive, just like all those domestic chores that circle round and round.

And, really, with all the campaign talk dissing contraception and women’s choices, doesn’t it feel like Draper’s ideas are coming around again, too?

Pedregon can be counted on to create provocative and wild pieces about women. Her last installation at Raices was a stunning beerbottle-cap construction about the drunken crash that killed Jackson Pollock and also took the life of a young woman named Edith Metzger.

Likewise, Raices Taller’s annual Mujeres show—this is the eighth—reliably scores points about women’s lives. The artists always jump in with an array of adventurous media, which this year range from Pedregon’s newspaper ads to thread to markers to tile.

A number of the artists delight in reworking women’s traditional crafts. Continuing with Pedregon’s fabric theme, Kelsey Wiskirchen has made three “Stitched Portraits.” Each is nicely drawn (if that’s the right word for an image in which the lines are made by thread), laced through background netting. One deft picture is a complicated rendering of figures in a landscape: two women in long skirts leaning over a cooking pot outdoors.

Elise Deringer’s fabric works are more abstract. In her “Inaccessible Pocket,” three framed pieces of patchwork silk have been hand-stitched, with erratic seams snaking hither and yon across the cloth. Tiny stones have been sewn between layers of the cloth.

And like Pedregon, Deringer mixes in text.

Adjoining a silk pocket colored in navy and sky blue is a line of her own poetry: “Staring at the sky / the constellations shift / becoming new.”

Tracy Brown rewrites art history in the comic “Les Hommes d’Avignon,” a laughout-loud spoof on Picasso’s influential “Les Demoiselles d’Avignon.” In this digital drawing,

Pauline H. Pedregon’s “I Am Woman.”

Brown converts Pablo’s demoiselles to gentlemen, and gives the guys hot-pink underpants to boot.

The Mujeres exhibition, this year showing some 86 works, is always an eclectic gathering of greater and lesser quality, with beginners proudly hanging their work next to art by accomplished artists.

Among the big Tucson names are painter Cristina Cardenas, who’s made three luminous landscapes of magical realism, and sculptor Barbara Jo McLaughlin, whose “Slash and Burn,” in carbonized wood, pine and steel, invokes traditional agriculture in Maya lands.

Ann Simmons-Myers, head of photography at Pima Community College, contributed a richly colored archival pigment print. It pictures artist George Welch in his studio, holding a shadowbox memorial to his late mother, his first art teacher. The shallow diorama, adorned with pink lace and flowers, is a picture within a picture: Its rectangle echoes the frame of the larger photo, and its beautiful colors and composition are repeated in Simmons-Myers’ work.

One interesting new artist, Billie C. Betters, is an older woman whose work has never before been shown in a gallery, according to Ceci Garcia of Raices. An African-MexicanAmerican from Nogales, Ariz., she exhibits two colored-marker pieces of remarkable energy.

“Mis Viejitas” represents an elderly couple in a public park rendered in hot pinks and emerald greens, drawn in a flattened perspective. An untitled glitter-and-marker drawing brings to life a female Yaqui deer dancer dancing against a wild, abstracted background of patterns and colors.

While Betters celebrates local communities, C.J. Shane has made an artist’s book, “The Migrants,” about the region’s great tragedy.

Folded into accordion pleats, the six-page book is a lament for the deaths of border-

Mujeres, Mujeres, Mujeres 1 to 5 p.m., Friday and Saturday, through Saturday, June 2; closing reception 6 to 9 p.m., Saturday, June 2, with music and readings Raices Taller 222 Art Gallery and Workshop 218 E. Sixth St. Free 881-5335; raicestaller222.webs.com/

crossers, male and female alike. (Deaths in fiscal 2012 were up to 94 as of the end of April, per Derechos Humanos, making for a total of 2,381 bodies found since 2000.)

Shane has painted an abstracted desert landscape on the back page, but the bulk of the book is a poetic narrative Shane credits to a crosser named Francisco Garcia-Torres, age 14.

“We go north to find jobs,” he says. “Death follows us with every step.”

An abbreviated list of the known deaths in the desert follows, including those of three young women: 19-year-old Elizabeth Sanchez-Morocho, 22-year-old Tania Graciela Cedillo Marquez, and 27-year-old Evelyn Lorena Leon-Vivanco.

In an inadvertent counterpart to this tragic coda, Jamie Williams’ trio of black-and-white cowgirl photos trace a woman’s lifespan as it was meant to be. “In Her Father’s Shadow” has a tiny future cowgirl playing in the dust of the corral. “Remember the Ride” is a close-up of a very old woman who gazes pensively over the rodeo fence.

The joyous “Round ’Em Up” celebrates a young cowgirl on the cusp of adulthood, just a little younger than the young migrant women memorialized in Shane’s book.

Williams’ bold young equestrian has an entirely different future ahead of her. She bounds along on a galloping horse, her hair flying, coming into her power.

MAY 17 – 23, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

27

MASTERPATH

ART

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THE TEACHINGS OF LIGHT AND SOUND

The conventional approach to spirituality instructs us to search for God and truth outside ourselves (exoteric), whereas the Light and Sound approach instructs us to search for God and truth within ourselves (esoteric). There is a vast difference between the two, of which greater numbers are growing increasingly aware.

–– Sri Gary Olsen Sri Gary Olsen Spiritual Leader of MasterPath

ESOTERIC APPROACH

EXOTERIC APPROACH

Search for God in temples or scriptures . . . . . . . . . . . . . God, Soul, and Spirit exist inside the body Born in imperfection, forgiving of sin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Born in perfection, resolving of karma Only one incarnation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Multiple incarnations External worship of Saints. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Attaining your own Self and God Realization Mind is the disciple . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Soul is the disciple Morality, forced abstinence and denial . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Moderation and balance in all things Hope of heavenly reward in afterlife . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Heavenly state attained while living Ascended Master . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Living Master

Saturday, May 26th — 1:00 pm - 2:30 pm Dusenberry/River Branch Library 5605 E. River Road, Tucson, AZ 85750 1:00 - 2:30 pm Introductory Talk (includes video presentation) To receive a free copy of the book Soul’s Divine Journey by Sri Gary Olsen, please visit our website at www.masterpath.org or write to P.O. Box 9035, Temecula, CA 92589-9035 USA

City Week Guidelines. Send information for City Week to Listings Editor, Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726, e-mail our account at listings@tucsonweekly.com or submit a listing online at tucsonweekly.com. The deadline is Monday at noon, 11 days before the Thursday publication date.

Please include a short description of your event; the date, time and address where it is taking place; information about fees; and a phone number where we can reach you for more information. Because of space limitations, we can’t use all items. Event information is accurate as of press time. The Weekly recommends calling event organizers to check for last-minute changes in location, time, price, etc.

OPENING THIS WEEK BEAR’S PATH GALLERY AND YOU CAN PAINT Bear’s Path Gallery and You Can Paint. 8806 E. Tanque Verde Road. 760-1416. Artists’ Choice, an exhibit of oil paintings by local and emerging artists, opens with a reception from 6:30 to 8:30 p.m., Monday, May 21, and continues through Saturday, Aug. 11. Hours are 9:30 a.m. to noon, Monday, Thursday and Friday; 9:30 a.m. to noon, and 6 to 9 p.m., Tuesday; 9:30 a.m. to noon, and 4 to 6 p.m., Wednesday; and 10 a.m. to noon, Saturday; free.

CARDBOARD BALL Galactic Center. 35 E. Toole Ave. 884-0874. An exhibit and dance party starting at 7:30 p.m., Saturday, May 19, features works in cardboard by a number of Tucson artists, dance music spun by Clif Taylor, and a raffle for a painting by Mykl Wells; $5, free with a cardboard costume. The event raises funds for Wells to compete in the 2012 Carasia Biennial, a paper and cardboard festival in Italy. Visit myklwells.com for more information.

CONGREGATION ANSHEI ISRAEL Congregation Anshei Israel. 5550 E. Fifth St. 7455550. Rabbi Robert Eisen talks about how 10 photographs by Israeli photojournalist Micha Mar-Am came into the congregation’s possession, and local artist Tidhar Ozeri discusses their artistic qualities, from 6 to 9 p.m., Sunday, May 20; freewill donation.

JCC FINE ART GALLERY Jewish Community Center. 3800 E. River Road.

299-3000. Abstract Architectural and Geometric Explorations, an exhibit of paintings by Judith A. Kramer, opens Friday, May 18, and continues through Wednesday, June 27. An artist’s reception takes place from 2 to 4 p.m. Sunday, May 20. Hours are 9 a.m. to 9 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., Sunday and Friday.

JOSEPH GROSS GALLERY Joseph Gross Gallery. 1031 N. Olive Road, No. 108.

626-4215. Above and Below, an exhibition of work

by Josh Keyes, opens Monday, May 21, and continues through Thursday, Aug. 30. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; $5.

TUCSON CLAY CO-OP Tucson Clay Co-op. 3326 N. Dodge Blvd. 792-6263.

The Little Things, an exhibit of functional pieces by Sara M. Curtiss, opens with a reception from 6 to 9 p.m., Friday, May 18, and continues through Thursday, May 31. Hours are 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; free. Visit tucsonclayco-op.com for more info.

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ART GALLERY AND STONE DRAGON STUDIO ART Gallery. 1122 N. Stone Ave. 624-7099, 4055800. American Daze/Russian Haze, an exhibit of new paintings by Alex Arshansky; and Endangered Cultures, an exhibit and sale of work by Jim Gruhl to benefit Shriners Children’s Hospital, continue through Friday, May 25. Hours are 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Thursday through Saturday, and by appointment; free.

ARTSEYE GALLERY ArtsEye Gallery. 3550 E. Grant Road. 325-0260. The fourth annual Curious Camera Event, featuring images from around the world made with pinhole, plastic, vintage, instant and cell-phone cameras, continues through Friday, June 15. Hours are 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday. Call 327-7291, or visit artseye.com for information.

ATLAS FINE ART SERVICES Atlas Fine Art Services. 41 S. Sixth Ave. 622-2139. A Marred Geometry: Mary Lou Alberetti, Mel Hombre and Katherine Monaghan, an exhibit of ceramic sculpture and works on paper, continues through Saturday, June 2.

Hours are 11 a.m. to 6 p.m., Tuesday through Thursday; and 11 a.m. to 7 p.m., Friday and Saturday; free.

BICAS ART ANNEX BICAS Art Annex. 44 W. Sixth St., No. 1D. (503) 2015011. An exhibit of bicycle-themed art, jewelry and art incorporating recycled bicycle parts, up-cycled accessories, photographs, limited-edition prints and functional objects, is featured from 6 to 9 p.m., the first Saturday, every month; free. For more information, email art@ bicas.org.

BRIDGE GALLERY Bridge Gallery. 5425 N. Kolb Road, No. 113. 5774537. Southwest contemporary art is featured. Summer hours are 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., and 5 to 9 p.m., Monday through Saturday, and by appointment; free.

DAVIS DOMINGUEZ GALLERY Davis Dominguez Gallery. 154 E. Sixth St. 629-9759.

Small Things Considered: 20th Small Works Invitational, featuring work by more than 80 artists, continues through Saturday, June 30. A reception takes place from 6 to 8 p.m., Saturday, June 2, as part of the Summer Art Cruise sponsored by the Central Tucson Gallery Association. Summer hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Thursday and Friday; and 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday; free. Call or visit davisdominguez.com for more info.

DELECTABLES RESTAURANT AND CATERING Delectables Restaurant and Catering. 533 N. Fourth Ave. 884-9289. Divine Providence, an exhibit of paintings and prints by Wil Taylor, continues through Thursday, May 31. Hours are 11 a.m. to 9 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 11 a.m. to 10 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and 10 a.m. to 9 p.m., Sunday; free. Visit wiltaylor.com for more information.

DESERT ARTISANS’ GALLERY Desert Artisans’ Gallery. 6536 E. Tanque Verde Road.

722-4412. Painted Spring, a diverse exhibit of works by local artists and artisans, continues through Sunday, June 3. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Saturday; and 10 a.m. to 1:30 p.m., Sunday. Visit desertartisansgallery.com for more information.

ETHERTON GALLERY Etherton Gallery. 135 S. Sixth Ave. 624-7370. This Land, This Sea: Joe Forkan, Nancy Tokar Miller, Lisa M. Robinson continues through Saturday, May 26. Gallery hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday, and by appointment; free. Visit ethertongallery.com.

FLUX GALLERY Flux Gallery. 2960 N. Swan Road, Suite 136. 6235478. Spring Awakenings, an exhibit of wood-turning, metal art and paintings by six Tucson artists, continues through Wednesday, May 30. Hours are 11 a.m. to 2 p.m., Thursday through Saturday; free. Visit fluxartists. com for more information.

JOEL D. VALDEZ MAIN LIBRARY Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. Artwork of Karen Bellamy, an exhibit of desertlandscape painting and mixed media; CreateIT Exhibit, a collection of student photography, Web animation and video and sound production; and Models That Tell a Story: The Art of Dioramas and Vignettes, an exhibit of various types of models, continue through Thursday, May 31; free. Library hours are 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Wednesday; 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., Thursday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 5 p.m., Sunday; free. Call 791-4010, or email askalibrarian@pima.gov for more information.

KIRK-BEAR CANYON BRANCH, PIMA COUNTY LIBRARY Kirk-Bear Canyon Branch, Pima County Library. 8959 E. Tanque Verde Road. 594-5275. An exhibit of Le Craven’s fine-art photographs of France and the American West continues through Thursday, May 31.

An artist’s reception is held from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m., Thursday, May 17. Hours are 10 a.m. to 9 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 5 p.m., Sunday; free.

PHILABAUM GLASS GALLERY AND STUDIO Philabaum Glass Gallery and Studio. 711 S. Sixth Ave. 884-7404. Philabaum and Phriends, an exhibit of glass art by Tom Philabaum and his colleagues, continues through Saturday, Sept. 1. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Saturday, and by appointment; free.

PIMA AIR AND SPACE MUSEUM Pima Air and Space Museum. 6000 E. Valencia Road.

574-0462. Round Trip: Art From the Boneyard, an exhibit of military airplanes and parts recycled into art works, continues through Thursday, May 31. Round Trip features works by more than 30 artists from around the world, including popular graffiti and street artists, and Tucsonan Daniel Martin Diaz. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. (last admittance, 4 p.m.), daily; $15.50, $9 ages 7 to 12, free younger child, $12.75 senior, military, Pima County resident and AAA member. Visit pimaair. org for more information.

PORTER HALL GALLERY Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. An exhibit of astrophotography by Adam Block continues through Wednesday, May 30; free with admission. Regular hours are 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., daily; $8, $4 child age 4 to 12, free younger child or member. Call or visit tucsonbotanical.org for more information.

RAICES TALLER 222 ART GALLERY AND WORKSHOP Raices Taller 222 Art Gallery and Workshop. 218 E. Sixth St. 881-5335. Mujeres, Mujeres, Mujeres, an exhibit of paintings, sculptures and multimedia works by women, continues through Saturday, June 2. Hours are 1 to 5 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and by appointment.

SILVER STREAK GALLERY Monterey Court Studio Galleries. 505 W. Miracle Mile.

582-0514. Eleven Reflexions, an exhibit of black-andwhite silver-gelatin photographs by Salt Lake City artist AnikĂł SĂĄfrĂĄn, continues through Sunday, May 27. Hours are noon to 4 p.m., Thursday through Sunday; and 6 to 8 p.m., Friday; free. Visit silverstreakgallery.com for more information.

TEMPLE GALLERY Temple Gallery. Temple of Music and Art. 330 S. Scott Ave. 624-7370. Red: A Juried Invitational, exhibited in conjunction with the play Red about artist Mark Rothko, continues through Friday, June 1. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; free. Call 622-2823, or e-mail info@ethertongallery.com for more information.

TOHONO CHUL PARK Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 742-6455.

An exhibit of winning works from the Congressional District 8 Art Competition continues through Sunday, May 27. Mesquite, an exhibit of photography and art representing mesquite trees in a range of media, runs through Sunday, July 22. Hours are 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., daily; $8, $6 senior, $5 active military, $4 student with valid ID, $2 ages 5 through 12, free member or child younger than 5, includes admission to the park. Visit tohonochulpark.org for info.

TUCSON INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT Tucson International Airport Gallery. 7250 S. Tucson Blvd. An exhibit of glass art by Cynthia Miller continues through Thursday, May 31, in the Upper Link Gallery.

Flight, Sight and Watermelons, an exhibit of watercolor paintings on paper by Kim Woodin, continues through

Saturday, Sept. 8, in the Main Gallery. TIA galleries are open 24 hours, daily; free. Visit flytucsonairport.com for more information.

TUCSON PIMA ARTS COUNCIL Tucson Pima Arts Council. 100 N. Stone Ave., No. 303.

624-0595. An exhibit of paintings, mixed media and photography by K. Loren Dawn and Gary Mackender continues through Wednesday, June 27. Hours are 8:30 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; free. Visit tucsonpimaartscouncil.org for more information.

UA MEDICAL CENTER SOUTH CAMPUS UA Medical Center South Campus. 2800 E. Ajo Way. 874-2000. Bridges II Artist Exchange, a cross-cultural project among eight artists in Tucson and the U.K., continues through Tuesday, May 29. Hours are 8 a.m. to 7 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 1:30 to 4 p.m., Saturday and Sunday; free. Call 310-2400 for more information.

UA POETRY CENTER UA Poetry Center. 1508 E. Helen St. 626-3765. In conjunction with the Poetry Off the Page Symposium, an exhibit of poetsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; work in other art forms continues through Thursday, May 31. Hours are 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday and Thursday; 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., Tuesday and Wednesday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; and 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday. Call or visit www.poetrycenter.arizona. edu for more information.

UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST CHURCH Unitarian Universalist Church. 4831 E. 22nd St. 7481551. The All Members and All Friends Art Show, exhibiting a range of two-dimensional work other than photography, continues through Sunday, June 3. Hours are from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Tuesday through Friday, and Sunday.

LAST CHANCE AGUA CALIENTE PARK RANCH HOUSE GALLERY Agua Caliente Park Ranch House Gallery. 12325 E. Roger Road. 749-3718. Perceptions, an exhibit of works in all media by members of the Southwest League of Fine Arts, closes Wednesday, May 23. Hours are 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., Wednesday through Sunday; free. Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov for more information.

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RANCHO LINDA VISTA BARN GALLERY Rancho Linda Vista Barn Gallery. 1955 W. Linda Vista Road. Oracle. 603-9077. Collaborations, an exhibit of work by Joy Fox and Albert Kogel, continues through Sunday, May 27. Hours are 1 to 4 p.m., Sunday, or by appointment; free.

BICAS UNDERGROUND ART WORKSHOPS BICAS. 44 W. Sixth St. 628-7950. BICAS offers workshops to create useful objects and art projects from recycled materials from 5 to 8 p.m., every Tuesday; freewill donation. Materials are provided, or you may bring your own. Call 201-5011, or search for â&#x20AC;&#x153;Bicas Underground Artâ&#x20AC;? on Facebook for information about each weekâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s project.

TRIANGLE L RANCH Triangle L Ranch. 2805 Triangle L Ranch Road. Oracle.

623-6732. Big Desert Sculpture Show continues through mid-August. The exhibit includes metal, glass and ceramic works for sale, and site-specific installations. Hours are 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., every Saturday; and by appointment; free.

TRUST GALLERY Keeling Schaefer Vineyards. 154 N. Railroad Ave. Willcox. (520) 824-2500. A silent art auction and artistsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; reception for the current exhibit Sky Island Elements takes place from 1 to 3 p.m., Saturday, May 19; free admission.

TUBAC CENTER OF THE ARTS Tubac Center of the Arts. 9 Plaza Road. Tubac. (520) 398-2371. Trudi Fletcher, 100 Years: A Centennial Celebration continues through Monday, May 28. Hours are 10 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., Monday through Saturday; and 1 to 4 p.m., Sunday. Call or visit tubacarts.org.

VENTANA MEDICAL SYSTEMS GALLERY Ventana Medical Systems Gallery. 1910 E. Innovation Park Drive, Building No. 2. Oro Valley. 887-2155.

Journeys, an exhibit of oils and acrylics by Judith Mariner, and collages by Barbara Brandel, continues through Saturday, June 30. Gallery hours are from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., the first and third Saturday every month; free.

Reservations are required 48 hours in advance; call 797-3959 for reservations or more information.

UPCOMING MOCA MOCA. 265 S. Church Ave. 624-5019. Flinching Eye Collective presents â&#x20AC;&#x153;Atemporal Radio Tourâ&#x20AC;? from 7 to 10 p.m., Thursday, May 24; $8, $5 member. The collaboration investigates the relationship between sound, music and noise. Visit flinchingeyecollective.tumblr.com.

CALL FOR ARTISTS Howard Salmon seeks contributors for a kidsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; coloring book that emphasizes the roles of influence and collaboration in the creative process. Interested artists must submit proposals by Thursday, May 31. Call 203-6803 for more information.

CALL TO ARTISTS Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. Submissions are sought for Flights of Fancy, an outdoor exhibit of bird houses created as real or imagined homes, to be displayed from Friday, June 1, through Sunday, Sept. 30. Pieces should be delivered from 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., Monday through Friday, May 21 through 25. Call 326-9686, ext. 35, or email communications@tucsonbotanical.org with Flights of Fancy in the subject line for submission requirements and more information.

VICTOR STEVENS STUDIO AND GALLERY IN THE DESERT Victor Stevens Studio and Gallery in the Desert. 14015 S. Avenida Haley. Sahuarita. 399-1009. Original work and giclee prints are shown from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., every Saturday; and by appointment. Visit victorstevensart.com for more information.

MUSEUMS EVENTS THIS WEEK ARIZONA HISTORY MUSEUM Arizona History Museum. 949 E. Second St. 628-5774.

100 Years: 100 Quilts continues through Saturday, Dec. 29. The quilts, created for the stateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s centennial, depict

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ARIZONA STATE MUSEUM Arizona State Museum. 1013 E. University Blvd. 6216302. Basketry Treasured, an exhibit of 500 pieces from the museumâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s collection of Southwest American Indian basketry, which is the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s largest, continues through Friday, June 1. An exhibit of 20 Hopi quilts continues through Monday, Aug. 20. Many Mexicos: Vistas de la Frontera continues through Friday, Nov. 30.

Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Saturday; $5, free youth younger than 18, active-duty military and their families, people with business in the building and everyone for public events. Visit statemuseum.arizona. edu for more information.

CENTER FOR CREATIVE PHOTOGRAPHY Center for Creative Photography. 1030 N. Olive Road.

621-7968. Speaking in Tongues: Wallace Berman and Robert Heinecken, 1961-1976, an exhibit examining how two Los Angeles artists used photography to bridge modernist and emerging post-modernist trends; and a group of works from the permanent collection that illustrate Los Angeles photography from the 1890s through the 1990s, continue through Sunday, June 17. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 1 to 4 p.m., Saturday and Sunday; free. Visit centerforcreativephotography.org for more information.

DEGRAZIA GALLERY IN THE SUN DeGrazia Gallery in the Sun. 6300 N. Swan Road.

299-9191. Portraits of DeGrazia, an exhibit of photographs and paintings of Ted DeGrazia, including works

by Louise Serpa and Thomas Hart Benton, continues through Sunday, Jan. 20, 2013. Ted DeGrazia Depicts the Life of Padre Eusebio Francisco Kino: 20 Oil Paintings is on permanent display. Hours are 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., daily; free. Call or visit degrazia.org for more information.

MINI-TIME MACHINE MUSEUM OF MINIATURES Mini-Time Machine Museum of Miniatures. 4455 E. Camp Lowell Drive. 881-0606. Brass Tracks and Smoke Stacks: G-Scale Model Railroading, an exhibit of model trains built from scratch and from kits, continues through Sunday, June 17. Hours are 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; and noon to 4 p.m., Sunday; $9, $8 senior or military, $6 age 4 to 17, $6 adults on Thursday through Dec. 27, free younger child. Visit theminitimemachine.org for more information.

MOCA MOCA. 265 S. Church Ave. 624-5019. Works by participants in the MOCA artist-residency program are featured in Air Show, which continues through Sunday, June 24. Hours are noon to 5 p.m., Wednesday through Sunday; $8, free member, child younger than 17, veteran, active military and public-safety officers, and everyone the first Sunday of each month. Call or visit moca-tucson.org for more information.

TUCSON MUSEUM OF ART Tucson Museum of Art. 140 N. Main Ave. 624-2333.

Frida Kahlo: Through the Lens of Nickolas Muray, photographs by Kahloâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s longtime lover and friend; Fridaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Style: Traditional Womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Costume From Mexico; and Tesoros del Pueblo: Latin American Folk Art, featuring many items from the museumâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s permanent collection, continue through Sunday, June 3. (con)text, an exhibit of works from the permanent collection that examine the impact of text in contemporary art, continues through Saturday, June 30. Museum hours are 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday; 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., Thursday; and noon to 6 p.m., Sunday; $8, $6 senior and veteran, $3 student with ID, free younger than 13, free the first Sunday every month.

UA MUSEUM OF ART UA Museum of Art. 1031 N. Olive Road. 621-7567.

Exhibitions featuring Sol LeWitt, who is among the founders of both Minimal and Conceptual art, and David Headly, who specializes in large-scale triptychs, open with an artistsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; reception from 5 to 7 p.m., Thursday, May 24, and continue through Sunday, Oct. 21. As part of the exhibition, six teams construct works according to

Find more @ .com

LeWittâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s specifications. Palimpsest: An Image of What Was, Art by Joshua Olivera continues through Sunday, Sept. 2. Visit artmuseum.arizona.edu for details of related activities. The Samuel H. Kress Collection and the altarpiece from Ciudad Rodrigo are on display until further notice. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; and noon to 4 p.m., Saturday and Sunday; $5, free member, student, child, faculty and staff with ID. Call or visit artmuseum.arizona.edu for more information.

UA SCIENCE: FLANDRAU UA Science: Flandrau. 1601 E. University Blvd. 6217827. Biters, Hiders, Stinkers and Stingers, an exhibit about poisonous animals and the good they do, continues through Thursday, May 31. Hours are 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., Monday through Friday; 6 to 9 p.m., Friday; 10 a.m. to 9 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 4 p.m., Sunday; $7.50, $5 age 4 to 15, free younger child, $2 Arizona college student with ID, $2 discount to CatCard holders.

Visit flandrau.org for more information.

OUT OF TOWN AMERIND MUSEUM Amerind Museum. 2100 N. Amerind Road, Exit 318 off Interstate 10. Dragoon. (520) 586-3666. A Journey: The Art of Glory Tacheenie-Campoy, an exhibit of paintings, sculpture, mixed-media works and prints, continues through Wednesday, Oct. 31. Hours are 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., Tuesday through Sunday; $8, $7 senior, $5 ages 12 through 18, free younger child. Visit amerind. org for more information.

GUNPOWDER PRESS EXHIBIT AND AMBOS NOGALES VINTAGE PHOTO GALLERY Tubac Presidio State Historic Park. 1 Burruel St. Tubac.

398-2252. Exhibits including a press and printed matter from Gunpowder Press, a mid-20th-century Tubac business, and a collection of vintage photographs depicting Nogales on both sides of the border, continue through Saturday, June 30. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., daily, except Christmas; $4, $2 youth ages 7 through 13, free younger child, includes admission to the park.

Visit tubacpresidiopark.com for more information.

LITERATURE EVENTS THIS WEEK DEE SNIDER: SHUT UP AND GIVE ME THE MIC Barnes and Noble. 5130 E. Broadway Blvd. 512-1166.

American singer-songwriter, screenwriter, radio personality and actor Dee Snider signs his memoir and his CD Dee Does Broadway while KLPX FM 96.1 does a live feed from 6:30 to 8:30 p.m., Thursday, May 17; free.

FRIENDS OF THE LIBRARY BOOK SALE Friends Book Barn. 2230 N. Country Club Road. 7953763. Recently discarded library books are for sale from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., Friday through Monday, May 18 through 21; free admission. Books are half-price Sunday, and $5 per bag Monday.

GARY NABHAN: DESERT TERROIR Antigone Books. 411 N. Fourth Ave. 792-3715. The author discusses and signs Desert Terroir: Exploring the Unique Flavors and Sundry Places of the Borderlands at 7 p.m., Friday, May 18; free. A Q&A follows.

JANE EPPINGA: LA MALINCHE Mostly Books. 6208 E. Speedway Blvd. 571-0110. Jane Eppinga signs her history of a Maya princess caught in a triangle with Montezuma and CortĂŠs, from 1 to 2 p.m., Saturday, May 19; free.

MAIN LIBRARY BOOK CLUB Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. Judith Freemanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Red Water is discussed from noon to 1 p.m., Thursday, May 17; free. Copies are available at the first-floor information desk. Call 7914010 for more information.

ONEBOOKAZ 2012: ARIZONA WAY OUT WEST AND WITTY Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. Authors Conrad Storad and Lynda Exley entertain adults and children with humorous stories and facts about Arizona from 4 to 5 p.m., Tuesday, May 22; free.

Free copies of their book Way Out West and Witty are given to the first 12 children.

OUT OF TOWN MATTHEW MARINE: DEVILâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S MOON Fairfield Inn by Marriott. 10150 N. Oracle Road. Oro Valley. 202-4000. A murder-mystery set in rural Arizona, Devilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Moon, is launched at a signing from 6 to 9 p.m., Thursday, May 17. Email mmarine615@comcast.net for more information.

CONTINUED ON PAGE 32

30 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

BOOKS The UA Poetry Center hosts a three-day symposium that will turn poetry into action

Beyond Books

BY MARGARET REGAN, mregan@tucsonweekly.com ny time this week, you just may catch a glimpse of a Chilean poet “weaving” parts of Tucson into the UA Poetry Center, says the center’s Annie Guthrie.

Cecilia Vicuña is setting out each day— along with local filmmaker Jonathan VanBallenberghe, Guthrie and an art graduate student—to visit trademark Tucson sites.

Saguaro National Park West is on her list, and so are Barrio Historico and the Pascua Yaqui reservation. What exactly she’s going to do at those places once she gets there is not entirely clear.

“It’s hard for me to describe,” acknowledges Guthrie, who’s the curator of this weekend’s Poetry Off the Page extravaganza, a celebration of everything new and groundbreaking in poetry. Vicuña’s journeys around town will “will be a nontemporal performance,” she offers, and have something to do with fabric.

Whatever Vicuña’s artistic process turns out to be, VanBallenberghe will catch it on film.

And by Saturday morning, Vicuña will install the weavings in the center’s library, which is exhibiting artworks by four other poets as well.

Danielle Vogel is displaying clay swallows’ nests, “stuffed with lines of discarded poetry,” Guthrie says. Christine Hume will provide “sound pillows” with CDs inside. Poetry-lovers can rest their heads on the pillows and “hear her reciting, and other layers of sound.” Jeff Clark has constructed “pieces made out of signatures from poets’ books.”

Amaranth Borsuk has created a digital book with no words. Only when you hold the book up to a camera in a nearby computer can you see any text.

“The works will fly onto the computer page like a 3-D reading,” Guthrie explains.

You’ll notice that no one here is even talking about old-fashioned poems on a page.

That’s the whole point: As the title has it, we’re talking here about poems off the page.

Nowadays, Guthrie says, “Poets aren’t just writing poetry. They’re writing plays, doing performances. They’re making movies. They’re dancing. Poetry isn’t just happening in a book.”

Guthrie enlisted a platoon of media-mixing poets to come to town, and throughout the weekend, they’ll provide all manner of avantgarde iterations on verse. Besides Vicuña’s poetic city-weaving, there will be dancing onstage, dancing in movies, musical collaborations, poetic stage dramas and even chanting.

You can learn how to make poetic hybrids of your own at writing workshops at the symposium, which will also offer scholarly panels,

JAMES O’HERN

A

Cecilia Vicuña, artist and poet. performances and screenings. For $150 ($80 if you’re a student), you can go to every single panel discussion on new multimedia poetry, every single performance and every single talk, from Friday night through Sunday afternoon.

That gold-plated ticket will cover performances both nights as well as the movies, otherwise known as “poemfilms,” that will screen at 1:30 p.m. on Sunday.

The art poets, including Vicuña, will give talks at 10:30 a.m. on Saturday about the art installations in the library. People without tickets can’t get in over the weekend to see the art installations or hear the talks, but any business day, starting Monday, you can stop by the library to see the art for free; the exhibition runs until May 31. And VanBallenberghe’s film eventually will go up on the Poetry Center’s website.

If you don’t want to spring for the whole shebang, you can go to the Friday night and Saturday night performances, both of them packed with barrier-breaking poets. Each show is $15. Vicuña herself will perform Friday night. But—here’s the rub—it won’t be about her weaving project. Instead, it will be something else entirely, what Guthrie calls a “poetry/sound hybrid performance.”

The lesson: When it comes to Poetry Off the Page, expect the unexpected.

Here’s the lineup at the evening performances.

Friday night at the UA Poetry Center, three daredevil poets will show off their genre-jumping skills. Christine Hume, the

poet responsible for the talking pillows in the library, starts the evening off with Speech Talks Back, an “audio documentary of poetics,” as Guthrie puts it. “She’s “DJ-ing a sampling of world poetry.”

Claudia Rankine will screen Undocumented and Here, the latest film in the long-running Situation Series, a collaboration with John Lucas. The movies are about “moments in contemporary culture.” (Symposium participants who turn up for the opening reception at 5:30 p.m. get to see the four earlier films in the series, each one shown in a separate room.)

Vicuña will follow up with “sound and song and chant,” Guthrie says, “an improvisational oral performance” that responds to place and time. All three women will hold a Q&A at the end of the evening.

Poets Theater, the Saturday evening show, begins at 6:30 at the Rogue Theatre. It takes its name from the poets’ theater movement, which Guthrie says is thriving in San Francisco. Brent Cunningham, a poet on the San Fran scene, presents three short plays: The Event, Time’s Machinery and The Gunfight.

They’re already written, Guthrie promises, but Cunningham likes to improvise, leaving some elements to chance. He also “likes to pick actors from the audience, and rehearse the plays onstage.”

New York poet Julie Patton and jazz guitarist Paul Van Curen composed their piece “See Here” on the train on the way to Tucson. “It’s a poetical musical performance,” Guthrie says.

“Julie wants the voyage and journey to be part

Poetry Off the Page Friday, May 18, through Sunday, May 20 UA Poetry Center 1508 E. Helen St. The Rouge Theatre 300 E. University Blvd. $150; $80 students; $15 for just Friday night or Saturday night performances 626-3765; poetry.arizona.edu/content/poetry-page-schedule

of what she does.” Patton herself predicted that the rhythms of the rails would “inform the air zones” in the work. The pair may also project images onto the stage backdrop.

K.J. Holmes of New York is a dancer, and Julie Carr of Colorado is a dancer and poet.

Their work, lengthily titled “This is where we are (or take arms against a sea of troubles), an excerpt,” is a “dialogue between body movement and poetry,” Guthrie says. “They’re calling it a writing dance performance.” The duo will also have films projected behind them.

The Black Took Collective is a troupe of three poets, hailing from California and New York. Their “Betraying Blackness,” the final performance of the evening, embraces nearly every genre.

“It’s a multimedia performance, with writing on the stage and projections,” Guthrie says.

“It uses sound, video and image.” A “political/ poetical” work, it “challenges our racial consciousness.” And, along the way, challenges our conception of poetry.

MAY 17 – 23, 2012

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LITERATURE

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 30

BOOKS

UPCOMING PIMA WRITERS’ WORKSHOP PCC West Campus. 2202 W. Anklam Road. 206-6042.

Literary agents and 14 authors talk about writing and publishing fiction, nonfiction and poetry from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday through Sunday, May 25 through 27; $130. Call 206-6084, or visit pima.edu for more info.

UA astronomer Chris Impey takes readers on a journey that starts at the very beginning of time

TOP TEN

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Cosmos Deconstructed

Antigone Books’ best-sellers for the week ending May 11, 2012

4TH WEDNESDAY MYSTERY BOOK GROUP Mostly Books. 6208 E. Speedway Blvd. 571-0110.

A mystery book club meets at 7 p.m., the fourth Wednesday every month; free. The selection for May 23 is Death at the Alma Mater by G.M. Malliet.

BY PAUL WINE, mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

1. Finding Your Way in a Wild New World: Reclaim Your True Nature to Create the Life You Want

MAIN LIBRARY BOOK CLUB Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. This group meets from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., on the third Thursday each month; free. Copies of each month’s reading selection are available at the first-floor information desk. Parking for two hours is validated for the lot below the library. Participants bring lunch. Call 791-4010 for more information.

SCIENCE-FICTION BOOK CLUB Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. A science-fiction book club meets from 7 to 8 p.m., the fourth Tuesday of every month. Visit www. orovalleylib.com for a schedule of titles.

SONORAN SLEUTHS MYSTERY BOOK CLUB Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. Fans of mystery and suspense meet from 11 a.m. to noon, the fourth Wednesday of every month except December; free. Each month’s topic may be found at orovalleylib.com. Call for more information.

LECTURES EVENTS THIS WEEK ART LECTURES AT DUSENBERRY LIBRARY Dusenberry River Branch, Pima County Public Library.

5605 E. River Road. 594-5345. Docents from the UA Museum of Art and the Tucson Museum of Art give talks from 2 to 3 p.m., the second and fourth Tuesday of every month, year-round; free.

FOUNDATION FOR INTER-CULTURAL DIALOGUE Foundation for Inter-Cultural Dialogue. 2841 N. Campbell Ave. 861-8738. Sat Bir Kaur Khalsa presents “Meet Your Sikh Neighbors: A Brief Introduction to Sikh” from 6:30 to 9 p.m., Monday, May 21; free. A Q&A, light refreshments and socializing follow. RSVP is requested by Saturday, May 19, via fid-az.org.

WEAVING IN THE EVENING Arizona State Museum. 1013 E. University Blvd. 6216302. In connection with the Basketry Treasured exhibit, curators, guest scholars and basket-weavers lecture from 6 to 8 p.m., every Thursday, through May 31; $15.

Visit arizonamuseum.arizona.edu to register.

OUT OF TOWN LECTURES AT THE WESTERN NATIONAL PARKS ASSOCIATION BOOKSTORE Western National Parks Association Bookstore. 12880 N. Vistoso Village Drive. Oro Valley. 622-6014. Lectures are free, but reservations are required. Bill and Cheron Mayhall present “Hiking Into the Grand Canyon for Novices” at noon and 2 p.m., Saturday, May 19. Shirley Pinkerton of the Arizona Historical Society Docent Council gives a living history presentation as “The Lady Bandit” Pearl Hart at noon and 2 p.m., Wednesday, May 23. For reservations, call between 9:30 a.m. and 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; or from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday. Visit wnpa.org for more information.

UA SCIENCE CAFÉ Mountain View Country Club. 38759 S. Mountain View Blvd. SaddleBrooke. 818-1000. Vincent Lonij of the UA Department of Physics discusses “Power From the Sun, Today and Tomorrow: New Photovoltaic Technologies and Smart Grid Research at the UA” at 6 p.m., Tuesday, May 22; free. Visit scienceconnections.arizona.edu for more information.

32 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

stronomers tell us that we live in an expanding universe filled with myriad galaxies that are rocketing away from each other at incredibly fast speeds. Yet, they say, it’s not the galaxies themselves that are doing the moving. It’s actually space that’s expanding, carrying the galaxies along with it.

If you find yourself as perplexed as I am by that somewhat counterintuitive concept, a new book by Chris Impey, a professor in the UA’s Astronomy Department, may be just what the cosmologist ordered.

In How It Began: A Time-Traveler’s Guide to the Universe, Impey says that to better understand the process of cosmic inflation, it’s helpful to imagine a large balloon, with an assortment of beads attached to the surface, being blown up. The beads, like the galaxies, are expanding outward and away from each other, but it’s the balloon that’s doing all the work.

Cosmology, of course, has more than its share of counterintuitive concepts, but Impey’s comprehensive survey of cosmic origins is brimming with nifty illustrations like that one, which help make maddeningly complex ideas easier (most of the time) to digest. Written with the wit and enthusiasm of a man who truly enjoys his work, this book is an excellent launching pad for readers who want to broaden their understanding of the cosmos.

Writing that astronomers are “armchair time travelers” who use telescopes as time machines, Impey—whose last book, How It Ends, predicts that the universe may eventually devolve into an icy porridge of subatomic particles—takes readers nearly 14 billion years into the past to the very beginnings of time. Along the way, he expounds on topics ranging from the formation of stars, planets, black holes and galaxies, to Einstein’s theory of relativity, quantum physics, the paradoxical shenanigans of antimatter and the epic struggle between dark matter and dark energy, two deeply mysterious forces that appear to control the universe.

Things start to get really interesting, however, when our cosmic tour bus reaches the vicinity of the Big Bang. This stupendous event, “the instantaneous creation of all space and time, with enough mass and energy to form 100 billion galaxies and disperse them across a volume of a million billion billion billion cubic light years,” is the linchpin of modern cosmogony. Impey tells us, however, that contrary to popular belief, the Big Bang doesn’t refer to a time when all matter in the universe

A

How It Began: A TimeTraveler’s Guide to the Universe

Martha Beck, Free Press ($26)

2. Loverboys

By Chris Impey

Ana Castillo, W.W. Norton ($13.95)

W.W. Norton and Co.

3. This Is Not the Story You Think It Is …:A Season of Unlikely Happiness

434 pages, $27.95

Laura Munson, Berkley ($15) was compressed into a single point, nor was it likely an explosion. (It wasn’t completely quiet, either, according to a University of Virginia astronomer who has “sonified” the microwave spectrum—residual radiation from the Big Bang—estimating that it was about as loud as a rock concert and may have sounded a bit like the resounding E chord that concludes the Beatles song “A Day in the Life.”) The Big Bang also doesn’t explain how the cosmos came to be. It’s simply a theory, Impey says, that traces the development of the universe from a smaller, hotter and denser state.

How did the cosmos come into being?

Writing that seemingly empty space is charged with a certain amount of potential energy, Impey suggests that the birth of the universe may have been a quantum event in which a tiny amount of quantum energy (a hundredth of a gram, it’s approximated) was “borrowed” from a pre-existing vacuum of space-time. Quantum fluctuations (energized particle waves) were then stretched by space inflation into what would eventually become the galaxies.

The hypothesis that our cosmos emerged from an earlier universe (and may, in turn, generate still other universes) opens the door to o the possibility that reality consists of an infinitee array of parallel universes. The “many worlds” theory posits that in every situation where there re are multiple possibilities, the cosmos divides into a separate world for each possibility.

“In each world,” Impey explains, “everythingg is identical except for one different outcome.

From then on, they each develop independently, and no communication is possible among them, so people living in those worlds are unaware that it’s going on. In this way, the ‘world’ branches endlessly. What is ‘now’ to us lies in the pasts of an infinite number of possible futures. Everything that can happen, does,, somewhere.”

I’m beginning to understand how cosmologists can sometimes be slightly deranged.

Overflowing with fascinating but highly abstruse ideas, this book would have profited greatly from an extensive glossary. However, readers will no doubt leave Impey’s erudite work with brains correspondingly crammed, a heightened sense of wonder and, hopefully, a desire to learn more about our amazing cosmic nest.

4. So Far From God: A Novel Ana Castillo, W.W. Norton ($13.95)

5. We Are in a Book!

Mo Willems, Hyperion ($8.99)

6. Catching Fire Suzanne Collins, Scholastic ($17.99)

7. Mockingjay Suzanne Collins, Scholastic ($17.99)

8. The Hunger Games Suzanne Collins, Scholastic ($8.99)

9. Are You My Mother? A Comic Drama Alison Bechdel, Houghton Mifflin Harcourt ($22)

10. Drift: The Unmooring of American Military Power Rachel Maddo Maddow, ow,, C Crown rown ro w ($25) ELENA SEIBERT

GREAT LITERATURE OF ALL TIMES Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. A reading and discussion group meets from 10 a.m. to noon, on the third Thursday of every month; free. Information about each month’s selection is available at www.orovalleylib.com.

Alison Bechdel

CINEMA ‘The Dictator’ covers too much familiar ground to succeed

Been There, Done That

TOP TEN Casa Video’s top rentals for the week ending May 13, 2012

BY COLIN BOYD, cboyd@tucsonweekly.com ou’ve seen this movie before.

In The Dictator, Sacha Baron Cohen plays a fish out of water who is acclimating himself to American culture and offending everyone in sight while he does it.

You could begin that sentence with “In Borat” or “In Bruno” and not make any other changes. Therein lies the problem with The Dictator: Unless Baron Cohen really throws a Hail Mary of a racist joke or something, this flick is going to feel awfully familiar.

He does complete a few of those passes—if we’re being generous, maybe a half-dozen— but almost nothing else in The Dictator lives up to his obvious but recently dulled comedic gifts. Admiral General Aladeen (Baron Cohen) is the despotic leader of the North African country of Wadiya. He’s a combination of just about every dictator you can think of—mostly Saddam Hussein and Moammar Gadhafi—but Aladeen doesn’t seem ruthless; he’s more absentminded and dismissive than he is bloodthirsty. Of course, The Dictator is a comedy (or at least that’s the rumor), so it probably wouldn’t play too well if we saw fountains of innocent blood.

The world community is cracking down on Wadiya—a continuation of the Arab Spring, perhaps—and Aladeen is invited to speak at the United Nations. After an assassin’s bullet kills his double, Aladeen insists that his second-in-command (Ben Kingsley) hire another lookalike in time for the Admiral General’s trip.

Upon his arrival in New York, Aladeen is kidnapped and tortured (by John C. Reilly in a brief walk-on), and his beard is removed so nobody will recognize the Supreme Oppressor’s dead corpse. The plot to assassinate him was hatched from within, and his most-trusted adviser plans to use the new double to sell off oil reserves to the highest bidders. Aladeen escapes, and without his trademark facial hair, is mistaken for a Wadiyan dissident by archetypal peacenik Zoey (Anna Faris).

The dictator is lost and powerless in the big city; it’s the first time in his life he can’t get anything he wants just by being who he is. Looking for any kind of answer, he manages to reconnect with his former nuclear adviser … who now works as a Mac Genius in an Apple Store. They hatch a plot to get Aladeen back to power.

While Baron Cohen uses a more-standard movie narrative this time around, the blast radius from The Dictator still comes from foreigner humor. Borat was a tourist; Bruno

Y

1. Contraband Universal

2. The Vow Screen Gems

3. Haywire Lionsgate

4. Underworld: Awakening Screen Gems

5. New Year’s Eve Warner Bros.

6. Mission: Impossible—Ghost Protocol Paramount

7. Joyful Noise Warner Bros.

8. Shame 20th Century Fox

9. The Innkeepers MPI

10. Pariah Focus Sacha Baron Cohen in The Dictator. was a homosexual who squeezed into hot pants and then into situations that would be intolerant of that; Aladeen is a blatant racist and sexist.

If someone pulling his eyes into a slant to mock Asians is funny to you, or if you think a video game re-creating the murder of Israeli athletes at the Munich Olympics is LOL, then have at it—those are foundational jokes in The Dictator, and most of the others never really rise above that. The majority involve childish, garden-variety racism, so they can’t really even be offensive; instead, they’re boring, outdated and far beneath a guy who could be the next Peter Sellers if he wanted. They’re just placeholders for where the good jokes would be if Baron Cohen still cared. The sex jokes are bawdy and occasionally gross, but they’re not malignant or anything.

When the flash of male nudity occurred in Borat, the rest of the film was so hilarious that it didn’t suffer much of a drop-off. It was still kind of a desperate move, especially for a comedy that hit on all other cylinders, but whatever.

The reason Borat was so funny in the first place was that there was something innocent and naive about the character’s beliefs and attitudes, as obscene as they might have been. That was less true with Bruno, a decidedly more-provocative premise, and the plan of attack—that this

The Dictator Rated R Starring Sacha Baron Cohen, Anna Faris and Ben Kingsley Directed by Larry Charles Paramount, 83 minutes Now playing at AMC Loews Foothills 15 (888262-4386), Century El Con 20 (800-326-3264, ext. 902), Century Park Place 20 (800-326-3264, ext. 903), Century Theatres at the Oro Valley Marketplace (800-326-3264, ext. 899), Harkins Tucson Spectrum 18 (806-4275) and Tower Theaters at Arizona Pavilions (579-0500).

character simply doesn’t know any better— doesn’t bolster The Dictator at all. Every once in a while, a redeeming one-liner buys Baron Cohen another few minutes of your trust. But is this a great comedy? Not even close.

For one shining moment, however, the comedian soars—and he doesn’t even say anything funny. His stinging satire of American democracy as a dictatorship, which comes far too late to save the film, is an example of how on point Sacha Baron Cohen can be when he’s motivated.

So where was that guy while they were filming the rest of this movie? Maybe that’s just his double.

Giovanni Ribisi in Contraband.

MAY 17 – 23, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

33

FILM TIMES Film times reflect the most current listings available as of Tuesday evening, with screenings beginning on Friday for most opening titles.

As schedules at individual theaters frequently change post-press, we recommend calling ahead to avoid any inconvenience.

AMC Loews Foothills 15 7401 N. La Cholla Blvd.

888-262-4386.

21 Jump Street (R) ends Thu 11:45, 2:20, 5:05, 7:35 Battleship (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Sat 10:10, 11:15, 1:10, 2:15, 4:15, 5:15, 7:15, 8:15, 10:20, 11:15; SunWed 10:10, 11:15, 1:10, 2:15, 4:15, 5:15, 7:15, 8:15, 10:20 Bully (PG-13) ends Thu 10 The Cabin in the Woods (R) endsy Thu 10:10 Chimpanzee (G) Thu 10, 1, 3; Fri-Wed 10 Dark Shadows (PG-13) Thu 11, 1, 2, 5, 8, 10:15, 11; Fri-Sat 10:40, 11:55, 1:20, 2:45, 4:05, 5:45, 6:45, 8:30, 9:45, 11:15; Sun-Wed 10:40, 11:55, 1:20, 2:45, 4:05, 5:45, 6:45, 8:30, 9:45 Dark Shadows: The IMAX Experience (PG-13) Thu 10, 4:15, 7:15; Fri-Wed 4:55, 7:45 The Dictator (R) Thu 10, 11, 12:15, 1:15, 2:30, 3:30, 4:45, 5:45, 7, 8, 9:15, 10:15; Fri-Sat 10, 11, 12:15, 1:15, 2:30, 3:30, 4:45, 5:45, 7, 8, 9:15, 10:15, 11:30; SunWed 10, 11, 12:15, 1:15, 2:30, 3:30, 4:45, 5:45, 7, 8, 9:15, 10:15 The Five-Year Engagement (R) Fri-Wed 1:25, 7:10 Girl in Progress (PG-13) Thu 10:25, 12:45, 3, 5:15, 7:30, 9:45; FriWed 10:15, 12:25, 2:35, 4:45, 7:20, 9:35 The Hunger Games (PG13) Thu 10:05, 1:30, 4:40, 7:50, 10:55; FriWed 10:30, 1:35, 4:40, 7:50, 10:55 The Lucky One (PG-13) Thu 12, 2:30, 10:05; FriSun 5:05, 7:35, 10:10; Mon 10:10; Tue-Wed 5:05, 7:35, 10:10 Marvel’s the Avengers (PG-13) Thu 10:10, 11:55, 1:15, 3, 4:30, 5, 6:15, 6:30, 7:45, 9, 9:30, 11; Fri-Sat 9:45, 11, 12:50, 2:05, 4, 5:10, 7:20, 8:15, 11, 11:30; Sun 9:45, 11, 12:50, 2:05, 4, 5:10, 7:20, 8:15, 11; Mon-Wed 11, 12:50, 2:05, 4, 5:10, 7:20, 8:15, 11 Marvel’s the Avengers 3D (PG-13) Thu 11, 2:15, 4, 5:30, 7:05, 8:35; Fri-Sat 11:45, 3, 6:30, 9:45; Sun 3, 6:30, 9:45; MonWed 11:45, 3, 6:30, 9:45 Marvel’s the Avengers: An IMAX 3D Experience (PG13) Thu 12:45, 10; FriWed 10:25, 1:30, 10:30 The Pirates! Band of Misfits (PG) Thu 10, 34 WWW. WEEKLY.COM

TuCsON

2:30, 7:05; Fri-Wed 10:20, 12:35, 2:50 The Pirates! Band of Misfits 3D (PG) ends Thu 12:15, 4:45, 9:25 Think Like a Man (PG-13) Thu 10:35, 1:25, 4:25, 7:25, 10:25; Fri-Wed 10:35, 4:20, 10 What to Expect When You’re Expecting (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Wed 11:25, 2, 4:30, 7:30, 10:05

Century El Con 20 3601 E. Broadway Blvd.

800-326-3264, ext. 902.

Battleship (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Wed 11:10, 12:10, 1:10, 2:15, 3:15, 4:15, 5:20, 6:20, 7:20, 8:30, 9:30, 10:30 The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Wed 11:10, 12:20, 2, 3:25, 4:55, 6:30, 7:50, 9:25, 10:40 The Cabin in the Woods (R) ends Thu 11:35, 2 Chimpanzee (G) Thu 11:15, 1:20, 3:25, 5:35, 7:40; Fri-Wed 11:15, 12:15 Dark Shadows (PG-13) Thu 11:30, 12:05, 1:30, 2:15, 2:55, 3:35, 4:10, 5, 5:40, 6:20, 7, 7:45, 8:25, 9:05, 10:30; FriSun 11:20, 1:20, 2:15, 2:55, 3:35, 4:10, 5, 6:20, 7, 7:45, 8:35, 9:05, 9:45, 10:30; Mon 11:20, 1:20, 2:15, 2:55, 3:35, 4:10, 5, 7, 7:45, 8:35, 9:45, 10:30; Tue 11:20, 1:20, 2:15, 2:55, 3:35, 4:10, 5, 6:20, 7, 7:45, 8:35, 9:05, 9:45, 10:30; Wed 11:20, 1:20, 2:15, 2:55, 3:35, 4:10, 5, 7, 7:45, 8:35, 9:45, 10:30 The Dictator (R) Thu-Wed 11:40, 1, 2, 3:20, 4:20, 5:40, 6:40, 8, 9, 10:20 The Five-Year Engagement (R) Thu 11:20, 2:10, 5:05, 7:55, 10:45; Fri-Wed 2:20, 5:05, 7:55, 10:45 Girl in Progress (PG-13) Thu 12:10, 2:30, 4:50, 7:10, 9:30; Fri-Wed 12, 2:30, 4:50, 7:10, 9:40 Götterdämmerung: Met Opera Ring Cycle Encore (Not Rated) Sat 12 The Hunger Games (PG13) Thu 1:10, 4:20, 7:30, 10:40; Fri 1:05, 4:20, 7:30, 10:40; Sat 7:30, 10:40; Sun-Wed 1:05, 4:20, 7:30, 10:40 The Lucky One (PG-13) Thu 11:40; Fri-Wed 11:50 Marvel’s the Avengers (PG-13) Thu-Wed 11:30, 1, 2:45, 4:15, 6, 7:30, 9:15, 10:45 Marvel’s the Avengers 3D (PG-13) Thu 11, 12, 12:30, 1:30, 2:15, 3:15, 3:45, 4:45, 5:30, 6:30, 7, 8, 8:45, 9:45, 10:15; Fri-Wed 12:30, 1:30, 3:45, 4:45, 7, 8, 10:15 Phantom Week: Love Never Dies (Not Rated) Wed 7:30 Phantom Week: Phantom of the Opera (Not Rated) Mon 7:30 The Pirates! Band of Misfits (PG) ends Thu 11:50, 4:40, 9:20 The Pirates! Band of

Misfits 3D (PG) ends Thu 2:25, 6:55 The Raven (R) ends Thu 11:25, 2:05, 5, 7:45, 10:25 Think Like a Man (PG-13) Thu 11:15, 2:05, 4:55, 7:50, 10:45; Fri-Wed 11:15, 5:40 What to Expect When You’re Expecting (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Wed 11:30, 12:40, 2:10, 3:30, 4:50, 6:15, 7:30, 8:55, 10:10

Century Gateway 12 770 N. Kolb Road.

800-326-3264, ext. 962.

Act of Valor (R) Thu 12:45, 3:30, 7; Fri-Wed 12:10 American Reunion (R) Fri-Sat 12:55, 4, 7:45, 10:20; Sun-Mon 12:55, 4, 7:45; Tue 12:55, 4, 7:45, 10:20; Wed 12:55, 4, 7:45 Casa de Mi Padre (R) ends Thu 12:20, 5:05 Dr. Seuss’ the Lorax (PG) Fri-Sat 12:40, 2:50, 5, 7:10, 9:35; Sun-Mon 12:40, 2:50, 5, 7:10; Tue 12:40, 2:50, 5, 7:10, 9:35; Wed 12:40, 2:50, 5, 7:10 Dr. Seuss’ the Lorax 3D (PG) Fri-Wed 12:05, 2:15, 4:25 Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance 3D (PG-13) ends Thu 12:35, 2:55, 5:25, 7:50 Jeff, Who Lives at Home (R) ends Thu 12:40, 3, 5:30, 7:45 John Carter (PG-13) FriSat 12:45, 3:55, 7, 9:55; Sun-Mon 12:45, 3:55, 7; Tue 12:45, 3:55, 7, 9:55; Wed 12:45, 3:55, 7 John Carter 3D (PG-13) Fri-Sat 6:35, 9:30; SunMon 6:35; Tue 6:35, 9:30; Wed 6:35 Journey 2: The Mysterious Island (PG) Thu 12:15, 2:35, 4:55, 7:15; Fri-Sat 12:15, 2:35, 4:55, 7:15, 9:45; Sun-Mon 12:15, 2:35, 4:55, 7:15; Tue 12:15, 2:35, 4:55, 7:15, 9:45; Wed 12:15, 2:35, 4:55, 7:15 Journey 2: The Mysterious Island 3D (PG) ends Thu 1:15, 3:35, 6 Lockout (PG-13) Thu 12:10, 2:40, 5:20, 7:40; Fri-Sat 3, 5:20, 7:50, 10:05; Sun-Mon 3, 5:20, 7:50; Tue 3, 5:20, 7:50, 10:05; Wed 3, 5:20, 7:50 Mirror Mirror (PG) Thu 12, 2:30, 5, 7:30; Fri-Sat 12, 2:30, 5, 7:30, 10; Sun-Mon 12, 2:30, 5, 7:30; Tue 12, 2:30, 5, 7:30, 10; Wed 12, 2:30, 5, 7:30 Safe House (R) Thu 12:50, 3:40, 7:10; FriSat 12:50, 3:45, 7:05, 9:40; Sun-Mon 12:50, 3:45, 7:05; Tue 12:50, 3:45, 7:05, 9:40; Wed 12:50, 3:45, 7:05 Salmon Fishing in the Yemen (PG-13) ends Thu 2:25, 7:20 This Means War (PG-13) Thu 12:30, 2:50, 5:15, 7:35; Fri-Sat 12:30, 2:55, 5:15, 7:35, 10:15; SunMon 12:30, 2:55, 5:15, 7:35; Tue 12:30, 2:55, 5:15, 7:35, 10:15; Wed 12:30, 2:55, 5:15, 7:35

A Thousand Words (PG13) ends Thu 12:25, 5:10 The Three Stooges (PG) Thu 12:05, 2:20, 4:45, 7:05; Fri-Sat 12:25, 2:45, 5:05, 7:25, 9:50; Sun-Mon 12:25, 2:45, 5:05, 7:25; Tue 12:25, 2:45, 5:05, 7:25, 9:50; Wed 12:25, 2:45, 5:05, 7:25 The Vow (PG-13) ends Thu 2:45, 7:25 Wrath of the Titans (PG13) Fri-Sat 12:20, 2:40, 5:10, 7:40, 10:10; SunMon 12:20, 2:40, 5:10, 7:40; Tue 12:20, 2:40, 5:10, 7:40, 10:10; Wed 12:20, 2:40, 5:10, 7:40 Wrath of the Titans 3D (PG-13) Fri-Sat 1, 3:40, 6:30, 9:25; Sun-Mon 1, 3:40, 6:30; Tue 1, 3:40, 6:30, 9:25; Wed 1, 3:40, 6:30

Century Park Place 20 5870 E. Broadway Blvd.

800-326-3264, ext. 903.

American Reunion (R) ends Thu 10:05 Battleship (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Sun 9, 10:05, 11:10, 12:05, 1:15, 2:20, 3:20, 4:30, 5:30, 6:30, 7:35, 8:40, 9:40, 10:45; Mon-Wed 10:05, 11:10, 12:05, 1:15, 2:20, 3:20, 4:30, 5:30, 6:30, 7:35, 8:40, 9:40 Dark Shadows (PG-13) Thu 10:35, 11:15, 12, 12:40, 1:20, 2, 2:45, 3:25, 4:05, 4:45, 5:30, 6:15, 6:55, 7:40, 8:20, 9:05, 9:45, 10:30; FriSun 9:25, 10:10, 10:45, 12:10, 12:55, 1:35, 2:55, 3:40, 4:25, 5:40, 6:20, 7:15, 7:40, 8:30, 9:10, 10:05, 10:35; Mon-Tue 10:10, 10:45, 12:10, 12:55, 1:35, 2:55, 3:40, 4:25, 5:40, 6:20, 7:15, 7:40, 8:30, 9:10, 10:05, 10:35; Wed 10:10, 10:45, 12:10, 12:55, 1:35, 2:55, 3:40, 4:25, 5:40, 7:15, 7:40, 8:30, 10:05, 10:35 The Dictator (R) Thu 10:30, 11:40, 12:50, 2, 3:10, 4:20, 5:30, 6:40, 7:50, 9, 10:10, 12:01; Fri-Wed 10:20, 11:30, 12:40, 1:50, 3, 4:10, 5:20, 6:35, 7:40, 8:50, 10 Dr. Seuss’ the Lorax (PG) ends Thu 12:15, 2:30, 5:05, 7:30 The Five-Year Engagement (R) Thu 10:05, 1, 4, 7:05, 10:10; Fri-Wed 9:45 Girl in Progress (PG-13) Thu 11:50, 2:20, 4:55, 7:25, 9:50; Fri-Wed 10, 12:30, 2:50, 5:15, 7:30, 9:55 Götterdämmerung: Met Opera Ring Cycle Encore (Not Rated) Sat 12 The Hunger Games (PG13) Thu 12:25, 3:45, 7:05, 10:15; Fri-Sun 9:20, 12:45, 4:05, 7:20, 10:35; Mon-Wed 12:45, 4:05, 7:20, 10:35 The Lucky One (PG-13) Thu 12:05, 2:35, 5:10, 7:55, 10:30; Fri-Sun 9:10, 11:50, 2:30, 5:10, 7:50, 10:30; Mon-Wed 11:50, 2:30, 5:10, 7:50, 10:30

Marvel’s the Avengers (PG-13) Thu 10:45, 11:55, 12:55, 2:05, 4:15, 5:25, 6:35, 7:35, 8:45, 9:55; Fri-Sun 9:05, 9:45, 10:25, 12:25, 1:05, 2:25, 3:05, 3:45, 4:20, 5:05, 7:05, 7:45, 9:05, 10:25; Mon 10:25, 12:25, 1:05, 2:25, 3:05, 3:45, 4:20, 5:05, 7:05, 7:45, 10:25; Tue-Wed 10:25, 12:25, 1:05, 2:25, 3:05, 3:45, 4:20, 5:05, 7:05, 7:45, 9:05, 10:25 Marvel’s the Avengers 3D (PG-13) Thu 10:10, 11:20, 12:20, 1:30, 2:40, 3:15, 3:40, 4:50, 6, 7, 8:10, 9:20, 10:20, 11:20; Fri-Sun 11:05, 11:45, 1:45, 5:45, 6:25, 8:25; Mon 11:05, 11:45, 1:45, 6:25, 8:25; TueWed 11:05, 11:45, 1:45, 5:45, 6:25, 8:25 Phantom Week: Love Never Dies (Not Rated) Wed 7:30 Phantom Week: Phantom of the Opera (Not Rated) Mon 7:30 The Pirates! Band of Misfits (PG) Thu 2:10; Fri-Wed 11:25, 1:55, 4:15 The Pirates! Band of Misfits 3D (PG) ends Thu 11:55, 4:40 The Raven (R) ends Thu 11:45, 2:25, 5, 7:45, 10:25 Think Like a Man (PG13) Thu 10, 1:05, 4:10, 7:10, 10; Fri 10:15, 1:10, 4, 7, 10:10; Sat 7, 10:10; Sun-Wed 10:15, 1:10, 4, 7, 10:10 What to Expect When You’re Expecting (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Sun 9:30, 10:55, 12:20, 1:40, 3:10, 4:35, 6, 7:25, 8:55, 10:15; MonWed 10:55, 12:20, 1:40, 3:10, 4:35, 6, 7:25, 8:55, 10:15

The Artist (PG-13) Thu 12:20, 2:40, 5, 7:15; FriWed 12:55, 5:15, 7:35 Dr. Seuss’ the Lorax (PG) Fri-Mon 11:10, 1:15, 3:20, 5:25, 7:30; Tue 1:15, 3:20, 5:25, 7:30; Wed 11:10, 1:15, 3:20, 5:25, 7:30 Jeff, Who Lives at Home (R) Thu 11:30, 3:40, 7:50; Fri-Wed 9:35 Jiro Dreams of Sushi (PG) Thu 1:25, 5:20; FriWed 11 John Carter (PG-13) FriWed 10:45, 1:30, 4:15, 7, 9:50 Journey 2: The Mysterious Island (PG) Thu 12:30; Fri-Wed 11:50 Lockout (PG-13) ends Thu 1:30, 5:40, 9:55 Mirror Mirror (PG) ThuWed 12, 2:20, 4:45, 7:10, 9:40 Safe House (R) Thu 2:50, 7:20, 9:50; Fri-Wed 9:25 Salmon Fishing in the Yemen (PG-13) Thu 11:40, 2:10, 4:35, 7, 9:30; Fri-Wed 2:10, 4:35, 6:55 The Three Stooges (PG) Thu 11:20, 3:20, 5:30, 7:40, 9:45; Fri-Wed 10:50, 3:10, 9:55 Wrath of the Titans (PG13) Fri-Wed 1, 3:15, 5:30, 7:45, 10

Fox Tucson Theatre 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515.

Star Wars: The Clone Wars (PG) Sat-Sun 2

Gallagher Theater UA Student Union, 1303 E. University Blvd.

626-0370.

Call for films and times

Harkins Tucson Century Spectrum 18 Theatres at the 5455 S. Calle Santa Cruz.

806-4275.

Oro Valley 21 Jump Street (R) ends Thu 7:45, 10:45 Marketplace 12155 N. Oracle Road.

800-326-3264, ext. 899.

Call for Fri-Wed films and times Battleship (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Wed 1, 4, 7, 10 Dark Shadows (PG-13) Thu 10:45, 1:35, 4:25, 7:15, 10:05 Götterdämmerung: Met Opera Ring Cycle Encore (Not Rated) Sat 12 Phantom Week: Love Never Dies (Not Rated) Wed 7:30 Phantom Week: Phantom of the Opera (Not Rated) Mon 7:30

Cinema La Placita La Placita Village, Broadway Boulevard and Church Avenue 326-5282.

Shadow of a Doubt (PG) Thu 7:30

Crossroads 6 Grand Cinemas 4811 E. Grant Road.

327-7067.

Act of Valor (R) ends Thu 9:35

Battleship (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Wed 9:50, 12, 1, 3:10, 4:10, 6:20, 7:20, 9:30, 10:30 Chimpanzee (G) ends Thu 10:45, 1, 3:15, 5:30 Dark Shadows (PG-13) Thu 9:40, 10:40, 11:40, 12:30, 1:30, 2:20, 3:20, 4:20, 5:20, 6:10, 7:10, 8:10, 10, 10:55; Fri-Sat 10, 10:50, 11:45, 12:40, 1:40, 2:40, 3:30, 4:30, 5:30, 6:30, 7:30, 8:30, 9:45, 10:20, 11:20; SunWed 10, 10:50, 11:45, 12:40, 1:40, 2:40, 3:30, 4:30, 5:30, 6:30, 7:30, 8:30, 9:45, 10:20 The Dictator (R) Thu 10, 11:20, 12:20, 1:40, 2:40, 4, 5, 6:20, 7:20, 8:40, 9:40, 11; Fri-Sat 9:40, 11, 11:50, 1:20, 2:20, 3:40, 4:40, 6:05, 7, 8:20, 9:20, 10:40, 11:40; SunWed 9:40, 11, 11:50, 1:20, 2:20, 3:40, 4:40, 6:05, 7, 8:20, 9:20, 10:40 Girl in Progress (PG-13) Thu 11:15, 1:45, 4:15, 6:40, 9:10; Fri-Wed 9:45, 12:20, 3, 5:25, 8, 10:35 The Hunger Games (PG13) Thu 12, 3:30, 6:50,

10:10; Fri-Wed 1:10, 7:15 The Lucky One (PG-13) Thu 11:30, 2:10, 4:50, 7:50; Fri-Wed 6:15, 9:15 Marvel’s the Avengers (PG-13) Thu 9:30, 10:30, 11:50, 12:50, 1:50, 2:30, 3:10, 4:10, 5:10, 6:30, 7:30, 8:30, 9:20, 9:50, 10:50; Fri-Wed 9:30, 10:40, 11:40, 12:50, 2, 2:50, 3:20, 4:20, 5:20, 6:40, 7:40, 8:40, 9:40, 10, 11 Marvel’s the Avengers 3D (PG-13) Thu 9:50, 11:10, 12:10, 1:20, 3:40, 4:40, 6:05, 7, 8, 10:20; Fri-Sat 10:10, 11:30, 12:30, 1:30, 3:50, 4:50, 6:10, 7:10, 8:10, 10:45, 11:30; Sun-Wed 10:10, 11:30, 12:30, 1:30, 3:50, 4:50, 6:10, 7:10, 8:10, 10:45 The Pirates! Band of Misfits (PG) Thu 10:50, 3:50; Fri-Wed 10:05, 12:35, 3:15 The Pirates! Band of Misfits 3D (PG) ends Thu 1:15, 6:15, 9:15 Safe (R) Thu 11:45, 2:15, 4:45, 7:15; Fri-Wed 10:20, 4:45, 10:55 Think Like a Man (PG13) Thu 10:10, 1:10, 4:30, 7:40; Fri-Wed 9:35, 12:45, 3:45, 6:50, 9:50 What to Expect When You’re Expecting (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Wed 11:20, 2:10, 5, 7:50, 10:50

The Loft Cinema 3233 E. Speedway Blvd.

795-7777.

Call 795-0844 to check handicap accessibility Alien Outlaw (Not Rated) Mon 8 Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (PG-13) Fri-Sat 10 Attenberg (Not Rated) Thu 10 The Deep Blue Sea (R) Fri-Sun 12:30, 2:45, 7:30; Mon 12:30, 2:45; Tue 2:45, 7:30; Wed 12:30, 2:45, 7:30 For the Benefit of All Beings (Not Rated) Wed 7 Juan of the Dead (Not Rated) Fri 10; Sat 10, 12; Sun-Wed 10 The Kid With a Bike (PG13) Thu 5 The Killer (R) Sun 11; Tue 7 Marley (PG-13) Thu 9:15; Fri-Sat 7; Sun-Mon 7, 10; Tue-Wed 10 Monsieur Lazhar (PG13) Thu 12:30, 2:45, 7; Fri-Mon 2:30, 4:45; Tue 4:45; Wed 2:30, 4:45 The Rocky Horror Picture Show (R) Sat 12 A Trip to the Moon (Not Rated) Thu 7:30 We Have a Pope (Not Rated) Thu 11:30, 2, 5; Fri-Sat 12, 5; Sun 5; Mon-Wed 12, 5

Find more @ .com

Oracle View 4690 N. Oracle Road.

292-2430.

Call for Fri-Wed film times Act of Valor (R) Thu 12, 2:25, 7:30 Casa de Mi Padre (R) Thu 11:10, 1:05, 3, 7:20 Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance (PG-13) Thu 5 The Iron Lady (PG-13) Thu 12:15, 2:40 Journey 2: The Mysterious Island (PG) Thu 11, 1:10, 3:20, 5:30, 7:40, 9:50 Project X (R) Thu 9:35 Safe House (R) Thu 11:30, 2, 4:30, 7:10, 9:40 This Means War (PG-13) Thu 7:15, 9:30 A Thousand Words (PG13) Thu 11:05, 1:15, 3:15, 5:20, 7:25 Tyler Perry’s Good Deeds (PG-13) Thu 4:55, 9:20 We Bought a Zoo (PG) Thu 4:50 The Woman in Black (PG13) Thu 9:55

The Screening Room 127 E. Congress St. 882-0204.

Call for films and times

Tower Theatres at Arizona Pavilions 8031 N. Business Park Drive. 579-0500.

Battleship (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Wed 10:40, 12, 1:30, 2:50, 4:30, 5:45, 7:20, 8:40, 10:10 Dark Shadows (PG-13) Fri-Wed 10:30, 11:50, 1:10, 2:25, 3:40, 5, 6:10, 7:30, 8:45, 10:05 The Dictator (R) Fri-Wed 10:15, 12:15, 2:15, 4:15, 6:15, 8:15, 10:15 The Five-Year Engagement (R) Fri-Wed 2, 4:50 The Hunger Games (PG13) Fri-Wed 3:30, 6:30, 9:30 The Lucky One (PG-13) Fri-Sat 11:45, 7:35, 9:55; Sun 7:35, 9:55; Mon-Wed 11:45, 7:35, 9:55 Marvel’s the Avengers (PG-13) Fri-Wed 10, 10:45, 11:30, 1, 1:45, 2:30, 4, 4:45, 5:30, 7, 7:45, 8:30, 10 Marvel’s the Avengers 3D (PG-13) Fri-Wed 12:15, 3:15, 8:15, 10:15 The Pirates! Band of Misfits (PG) Fri-Wed 11:10, 1:20 What to Expect When You’re Expecting (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Wed 11:40, 2:10, 4:40, 7:10, 9:40

FILM CLIPS

CINEMA

Reviews by Colin Boyd and Bob Grimm.

A great look can’t revive the dull ‘Dark Shadows’ script

Corpse of a Film

BY BOB GRIMM, bgrimm@tucsonweekly.com lot of work and a lot of money have gone into Tim Burton’s Dark Shadows, a big-screen adaptation of that strangest of strange soap operas that ran in the late 1960s and early ’70s.

The saga of tortured vampire Barnabas Collins proves to be a nice exercise for the eyes, but the stuff coming out of people’s mouths and the pacing of the film are too languid to keep a person’s interest.

Burton has his go-to guys here: Johnny Depp steps into the infamous role of Barnabas (the original Barnabas, Jonathan Frid, died recently), while Danny Elfman provides the soundtrack. Unfortunately, Depp drones on and on with seemingly every line, while Elfman’s meandering soundtrack fails to liven up the film. As a result, Dark Shadows is monstrously boring for much of its running time.

The film’s opening is set 200 years ago, with a quick glance at Barnabas’ childhood and his time on the planet as a young adult. After a quick affair with family servant Angelique (Eva Green), he turns his amorous attentions to the beautiful Josette (Bella Heathcote).

Angelique, who dabbles in witchcraft, compels Josette to do something very sad, and has something worse in store for Barnabas: He’s going to spend the rest of his years as a vampire. Furthermore, he will spend eternity buried in a coffin.

Of course, nearly every parcel of ground in the United States will eventually be dug up to make way for a McDonald’s or something, so Barnabas is freed two centuries later, and returns to his mansion at Collinwood to meet his relatives.

Michelle Pfeiffer plays the stately Elizabeth Collins Stoddard with her usual grace, while Chloë Grace Moretz is actually slightly annoying as her rebellious, grumpy daughter Carolyn. Johnny Lee Miller plays Roger, the flaky family patriarch, and Helena Bonham Carter gets her usual Burton film role as the strange doctor.

Youngest son David (Gulliver McGrath) can see dead people, and so can his new nanny, Victoria. Victoria is also played by Heathcote, which creates all sorts of confusion for Barnabas, who still longs for his dead girlfriend.

This would seem to be a fun setup for a clashing of sensibilities. No such luck: Most of Dark Shadows has Depp in a dreary soap-opera mode, with him whining about his predicament or the nonevents of the day. There is surprisingly little action, and when there is action, it isn’t anything to get worked up about.

A

NEWLY REVIEWED: THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL

It would be difficult for a movie with the cast of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel to suck, and while it’s a good film, director John Madden (Shakespeare in Love) doesn’t lead his renowned ensemble to the heights they’re capable of reaching. Dame Judi Dench, Dame Maggie Smith, Tom Wilkinson and Bill Nighy are the principal players, a group of disparate retirees recharging their lives at the Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, which is run by Slumdog Millionaire’s Dev Patel. (He has, um, oversold the charm of his hotel.) It’s a dramedy that never really goes anywhere unexpected. That isn’t to say there aren’t some nice things about it; obviously, you’re going to get good performances, but it’s one of those Brit slice-of-lifers they should have hired Richard Curtis (Love, Actually; Four Weddings and a Funeral) to write. This is a movie about finding life that could use a little more life itself. Boyd THE DEEP BLUE SEA

Writer-director Terence Davies has made a good but sad film based on the play by Terence Rattigan.

Rachel Weisz lets it all out as Hester, the wife of a prominent British judge (Simon Russell Beale) who is older. She falls for Freddie (Tom Hiddleston), a former Air Force pilot. The film opens on a very somber note, and then tells the back story. It’s an uncompromising look at bad decisions, and how selfish behavior can ruin lives. While it’s no party to watch, it’s undoubtedly a fine film, with Weisz and Hiddleston creating what will surely be one of the year’s most-memorable screen couples. Beale is also very good as the jilted man who is trying to handle a humiliating situation with grace. Grimm

Johnny Depp in Dark Shadows.

Dark Shadows Rated PG-13 Starring Johnny Depp, Michelle Pfeiffer and Eva Green Directed by Tim Burton Warner Bros., 113 minutes Now playing at AMC Loews Foothills 15 (888262-4386), Century El Con 20 (800-326-3264, ext. 902), Century Park Place 20 (800-326-3264, ext. 903), Century Theatres at the Oro Valley Marketplace (800-326-3264, ext. 899), Harkins Tucson Spectrum 18 (806-4275) and Tower Theaters at Arizona Pavilions (579-0500).

The potentially interesting story of Victoria is pushed into the background, and more of an emphasis is placed on the Barnabas/ Angelique rivalry. Their crazy sex scene is supposed to be played for comic effect, but it feels like it should be in another movie.

I was under the impression that the film would have a more satiric and comedic tone.

However, the efforts at comedy fall flat and don’t feel integrated. This is surprising, considering how Burton’s efforts at comedy have been so successful in the past. His other gothic epic, Sleepy Hollow, had some great laughs.

There is not much to laugh at here, even when Alice Cooper drops by the mansion for an evening of entertainment. The Cooper presence is a wasted opportunity.

Burton has made a good-looking movie.

The film’s most-interesting visual is the ghost of Josette floating around the house and swinging around the chandelier. (It looks very much like something you would see in Disney’s Haunted Mansion.)

Obviously, you need much more than pretty pictures to tell a good story, and the script for Dark Shadows stinks. As a result, this is the second lackluster pairing of Depp and Burton in a row, after the lousy Alice in Wonderland.

JUAN OF THE DEAD

Writer-director Alejandro Brugués does what amounts to a Cuban version of Shaun of the Dead with this semi-funny, adequately grisly zombie film.

When people start biting each other in Cuba, some people at first think America is doing some sort of strange political invasion. Soon, it becomes clear that it is just your average zombie plague—and heads must be smashed! Juan (Alexis Díaz de Villegas) sets about killing zombies for money, which is probably the least successful aspect of the film.

The movie goes for equal parts laughs and scares, and it scores a moderate amount of both. As far as zombie films go, this one falls somewhere in the middle of the pack. It’s better than a lot of the straight-to-video flicks, but not as good as Romero’s best—or Shaun of the Dead, for that matter. It’s respectable, but not very memorable. Grimm

CONTINUING: BULLY

We are spared graphic violence and severe emotional distress in Bully, but the impact is not muted by the decision to tone it down. The helplessness of the victims permeates every scene, so the documentary still carries a lot of weight. However, like other recent socially heavy nonfiction films (Waiting for “Superman,” for one), the power of the message is stronger than the overall quality of the film. It fails in presenting a true course of action, although on the basis of opening lines of communication, Bully could be a life-saving conversation starter. The film went through a serious round of ratings controversy, but it is now PG-13, meaning it can be seen by the audiences that need to see it most. Boyd THE CABIN IN THE WOODS

This crazy film comes from writer/director Drew Goddard and co-writer Joss Whedon, Whedon being the father of TV’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer and hero to geeks everywhere. The film is quite clever—maybe a little too clever at times. The setup sees a typical sampling of college students getting ready for a vacation at the lake. They are Curt the Jock (Chris Hemsworth, aka Thor!), Dana the Almost-Virgin (Kristen Connolly), Jules the Whore (Anna Hutchison), Holden the Hot Nerd (Jesse Williams) and Marty the Wisecracking Stoner (Fran Kranz). At the same time, we see two working stiffs (Richard Jenkins and Bradley Whitford) reporting to their very peculiar jobs. The film works as both a straight-up horror film and a funny homage to the genre, with plenty of great reveals and twists along the way, including an awesome final cameo. Grimm CHIMPANZEE

While watching Disneynature’s latest effort, I was reminded of some of the shows I used to catch as a kid during TV’s Wonderful World of Disney. I remembered being wowed by the cool nature footage that

Walt’s army used to catch, and I also remembered that the narration would bore and/or annoy me in contrast. Such is the case with this movie. The footage of a little chimpanzee orphan dubbed Oscar is amazing stuff. Oscar, an energetic 3-year-old, is a cute little shit, and I could watch hours of footage featuring his adorable eyes and natural sense of mischief. I’d say I’d like to pinch his cheek, but he would probably tear my arms off in the process. As for listening to Tim Allen narrate the story of Oscar and his predicament (“Power tools … grr!”), I was longing for the voice of Morgan Freeman or James Earl Jones. Or perhaps even the famous primatologist Jane Goodall, who served as an adviser on the flick. Grimm THE LUCKY ONE

Film adaptations of Nicholas Sparks novels almost always have several things in common—like attractive lead actors, the Carolinas, and death. Oh, and every movie poster features a passionate embrace.

The Lucky One sticks with that formula, but doesn’t offer enough substance to overcome it. The attractive leads are Zac Efron and Taylor Schilling, who was last seen as powerful magnate Dagny Taggart in that bad Atlas Shrugged adaptation last year. Logan (Efron) walks from Colorado to Louisiana—it’s North Carolina in the book, keeping with Sparks’ tradition—to find a woman in a picture that he unearthed while serving in Iraq, believing her to be some kind of guardian angel. Maybe she isn’t, but Beth (Schilling) is easy on the eyes, so Logan hangs around and love blooms … because the movie poster wouldn’t have it any other way. Boyd MARLEY

This documentary from director Kevin Macdonald does an excellent job of chronicling the life of Bob Marley, from his young-boy days through his untimely death from cancer at the age of 36. The nearly 2 1/2-hour documentary is a must-see for lovers of the man. If you dig films about musical history, but aren’t necessarily a Marley fan, it’s still a good watch. Macdonald gets some great interviews, including Jimmy Cliff; Marley children Ziggy and Cedella; Marley’s wife, Rita; and his mom, Cedella Marley-Booker. It’s surprising to hear Ziggy speak of his dad as a rough, uncompromising guy who wouldn’t give in just a little during foot races on the beach; I pictured Marley as an absolute sweetheart.

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FILM CLIPS

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 35

I went into this film knowing plenty about Marley’s music. After seeing Macdonald’s heartfelt effort, I know a lot more about Bob Marley, the man, and I’m grateful for that. Grimm MARVEL’S THE AVENGERS

Everything good about the last bunch of Marvel superhero movies comes together for one massive, excessively entertaining party. Director Joss Whedon hits all of the right notes as Captain America (Chris Evans), Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.), Thor (Chris Hemsworth) and the Hulk (newbie Mark Ruffalo) get equal time in this well-balanced, funny and completely satisfying cinematic experience. I wasn’t sure if they would pull this off, but they did, with Loki (Tom Hiddleston) bringing the fun as the villain.

Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson) and Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) contribute mightily to the process, as does Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson). Good luck to the rest of the summer movies in trying to top this one’s fun factor. Grimm MONSIEUR LAZHAR

A nominee for last year’s Best Foreign Language Film, Monsieur Lazhar comes to us all the way from ... Montreal! Well, they do speak French there. Of course, the category should really honor any international film made outside the big Hollywood system, but that’s a story for another time. Lazhar (Mohamed Saïd Fellag) is wrestling with a couple serious issues when he becomes an emergency substitute teacher in Quebec. First, he’s an immigrant. Second, his wife and children perished in an arson attack; she was a writer whose politically motivated work set off the wrong people back home in Algeria. He encounters a third problem in class: He’s replacing a teacher who killed herself. Despite the heavy nature of all of these events, Monsieur Lazhar is hopeful and humane. It’s not a film about grieving, but carrying on. And a good one at that. Boyd THE PIRATES! BAND OF MISFITS

If you’ve followed Aardman Animations’ upward trajectory from the Wallace and Gromit shorts to Chicken Run to the Wallace and Gromit feature film and beyond, you’re probably stoked for their take on the pirate genre. Well, you may not exactly be disappointed with Pirates! Band of Misfits, but the com-

pany’s latest doesn’t really stack up favorably to the top-notch Aardman stuff. It’s fun to see bumbling pirates (led by Hugh Grant), and it’s particularly odd and rewarding that their big quest involves Charles Darwin and a science fair, but Pirates! doesn’t quite establish itself firmly enough. It’s great that the studio hasn’t forsaken stop-motion altogether (they’re heavily into CGI now), but Pirates! doesn’t completely capture the ol’ Aardman magic. Boyd THINK LIKE A MAN

Comedian Steve Harvey became something of a relationship guru several years ago when he released the book Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. The book is designed to help women get what they want out of relationships by out-guying guys. Of course, Harvey’s on his third marriage, but whatever. Its lessons are fictionalized in Think Like a Man, which operates kind of like He’s Just Not That Into You: There are attractive actors walking through specific scenarios (e.g. the Momma’s Boy meets the Single Mother), with Harvey’s love lessons guiding the way. Thanks to comic Kevin Hart, Think Like a Man has some genuinely funny moments, and Taraji P. Henson and Regina Hall give the light comedy a little punch. It’s actually a little better than the movies it is supposed to mimic—even with Steve Harvey popping up from time to time. Boyd WE HAVE A POPE

You never hear about a pope stepping down. And who knows if someone has ever turned down the job? After all, the papal conclave is such a secret affair. But if either of those things did happen … well, it still probably wouldn’t resemble the events of We Have a Pope. The newly elected pontiff (a sublime Michel Piccoli) has a different kind of epiphany and realizes that his life’s work in the church is not his life’s passion. Faced with years behind the bulletproof glass of the Popemobile, he runs. There’s a period of time when Vatican officials don’t even know where he is. It’s a good character study, and Piccoli will be quite a find for American crowds, but We Have a Pope doesn’t connect enough dots to make it all worthwhile. Boyd

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N O W S H O W I N G AT H O M E Being John Malkovich CRITERION MOVIE A SPECIAL FEATURES B DVD GEEK FACTOR 9 (OUT OF 10)

This will always be one of my favorite movies. Director Spike Jonze and writer Charlie Kaufman came up with a unique concept, and their execution of the material is hilarious, dark and timelessly truthful.

God bless John Malkovich for allowing this movie to be made. It’s a trippy meditation on what it’s like to have your privacy invaded, as well as an interesting take on reincarnation.

John Cusack plays an eccentric puppeteer who gets a job as a file clerk and discovers a portal into the body of Malkovich while peeking behind a cabinet. Catherine Keener plays the mean girl for whom Cusack falls, a woman who only wants to exploit the portal to steal his wife (an uncharacteristically mousy Cameron Diaz). Her affections for the wife depend upon her actually traveling through the portal and going into Malkovich.

This creates one of cinema’s all-time-strangest love triangles—which is actually a love square, if you count Malkovich himself, even though other people are inhabiting him. It’s not as confusing as it sounds.

All the performers are great, but I especially like Malkovich, who was robbed of an Oscar nomination. I would’ve loved to see him take home an Oscar for playing himself. (Michael Caine won the Supporting Actor Oscar that year for The Cider House Rules, and was far less deserving.)

Having not seen the film in quite some time, I forgot about Charlie Sheen playing himself as Malkovich’s confidant (a role originally offered to Kevin Bacon).

Jonze has made a couple of great movies since 1999 (Where the Wild Things Are

and Adaptation), but this remains his best work.

SPECIAL FEATURES: The twodisc set contains a strange and funny commentary from director Michel Gondry, a friend of Jonze who actually gets the director on the phone toward the end of the track. Gondry is a little hard to understand, but that’s actually part of the fun. You also get a new interview with Malkovich, who describes how he got involved with the project. (He loved the script, but wanted it to be about somebody else.) The film is also available as a single-disc Blu-ray.

Chronicle (Blu-ray) 20TH CENTURY FOX MOVIE C SPECIAL FEATURES C BLU-RAY GEEK FACTOR 4 (OUT OF 10)

This is one of those “foundfootage” films that have annoyed me—and this one annoys me the most, because its premise is good.

(Some high school kids get superpowers from a meteor, and things go nuts.) I hated the found-footage gimmick; it’s a completely unnecessary distraction to a potentially good story. However, the film was a pretty big hit, and a sequel is supposedly on the way. Oh, boy.

SPECIAL FEATURES: You can watch the theatrical version or the director’s cut. You also get a deleted scene.

Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie MAGNOLIA MOVIE C SPECIAL FEATURES BDVD GEEK FACTOR 5 (OUT OF 10)

I love these guys. I loved their Adult Swim show, Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!, and especially love their oddball show created for John C. Reilly, Check It Out! But I don’t love this

BY BOB GRIMM, bgrimm@tucsonweekly.com 36 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

movie. I don’t even like it very much—which shocked me, considering the talent involved. Performers include Will Ferrell, Will Forte, Reilly, Zach Galifianakis and Robert Loggia.

And, of course, creators Tim Heidecker and Eric Wareheim are two very funny guys.

The plot is—not surprisingly—quite silly: Tim and Eric have blown the money of a bad man (Loggia) by making a crappy lovestory movie starring Johnny Depp—while not realizing that Depp was, in fact, a Depp impersonator. They need to make a billion dollars fast to save their hides, so they go to work for Ferrell at his rundown shopping mall.

Gross humor ensues.

Some of the bits are funny.

I like Reilly as a strange wild man raised in the mall who is constantly sick, and there’s a fun running gag involving a crazy wolf. I also liked Ferrell’s character and his need to watch Top Gun over and over again.

But much of the humor is too over-the-top and disgusting—especially when one of the men takes a bath in diarrhea; it’s about as gross as anything you will ever see. While I did love the TV show, I thought they started incorporating too much diarrhea in the program during the later seasons. Seriously.

I hate to see these guys come up short. They are a couple of bizarre men, and their humor is an acquired taste. Even though I have acquired a taste for their humor, I couldn’t get into this one.

These guys have a funny film in them. Just cut it out with the diarrhea … please.

SPECIAL FEATURES: An audio commentary from Tim and Eric, along with deleted and extended scenes. You also get a Shrim Dance screensaver.

If you see the movie, you will know what Shrim is. If you know what Shrim is, you will be scared.

CHOW Except for friendly service, the Vail Steak House Café and Diner was a disappointment

NOSHING AROUND

Mediocre Meat

BY ADAM BOROWITZ noshing@tucsonweekly.com

New: Bella D’Auria

BY JACQUELINE KUDER, jkuder@tucsonweekly.com here isn’t a huge selection of locally owned restaurants in the Vail area, so when one of them doesn’t meet expectations, it seems like an even bigger disappointment—and unfortunately, dining at the Vail Steak House Café and Diner was a subpar experience on almost all counts.

The historic building, purchased and revamped by the current owners in 2008, needs a décor update—the interior is dingy and feels like it hasn’t been changed since the early 1980s.

The décor wasn’t the worst of it, though.

On both of our visits (lunch and dinner), we were the only people in the restaurant by the end of our meal, and it’s no wonder.

If “steakhouse” is in your name, then steaks should be a key part of the menu; at the Vail Steak House, there are seven steak selections on the massive four-page menu. I ordered the 12-ounce rib-eye ($21), because it’s my favorite cut—it’s generally tender because of the fat marbling throughout the meat, and it is a pretty forgiving steak when it comes to cooking.

This was the worst rib-eye I’ve ever eaten.

The steak was a very thin cut of meat and was so tough that cutting through it with a steak knife was a challenge. There were two large veins of gristle, and although it was cooked medium-rare, as ordered, it was pretty much inedible. The side dishes were no better. My baked potato was still hard in the middle; the cowboy beans never even made it to the table; and the vegetables were cooked so long that they disintegrated the moment they hit my tongue.

Ted’s entrée didn’t fare much better. The half-slab of pork baby-back ribs ($19.95) was unimpressive. The first two ribs on each end of the slab were chewy and dry, and the ribs in the middle were greasy. There wasn’t much in the way of sauce or dry rub on the ribs (the menu doesn’t specify if they are cooked in a dry-rub style or a sauce style)—or, for that matter, flavor. His sides were just as terrible as mine—the mashed potatoes tasted like they came out of a box; the gravy was unbearably salty and came to the table with a thick skin on it, like it had been sitting around untouched for a while. Ted didn’t get his cowboy beans, either, and the vegetables suffered the same fate as mine.

On both of our visits, the appetizers were, in a word, unappetizing. They are also expensive for the portion size and quality.

The potato skins consisted of four tiny skins topped with cheddar cheese and two or three

The new Italian restaurant Bella D’Auria is open at 4445 E. Broadway Blvd. This one was a long time coming—renovations to the space took almost a year—but if you’re a fan of Naples-style Italian food, it will have been worth the wait. Expect lasagna; veal piccata and parmigiana; super-spicy shrimp fra diavolo; and appetizers ranging from baconwrapped jalapeños to calamari dishes. Bella D’Auria also offers full espresso service, Italian cream sodas, signature cocktails and a sleek interior that should be a perfect backdrop for a late-night scene. Call 468-2447, or visit www.belladauria.com for details.

T

Dine for Felines Enjoy dinner in the verdant courtyard of La Cocina at Old Town Artisans (201 N. Court Ave.) from 5 to 9 p.m. on Tuesday, May 29, and a portion of your bill will be donated to help homeless cats. The fundraiser for PAWSitively Cats No Kill Cat Shelter—which focuses on helping adoptable and specialneeds cats—will also have live music by the Decades, a raffle and a silent auction.

Donations of cat food and scoopable cat litter will be collected; 622-0351.

KEITH PERFETTI

Beat the Heat

The mushroom burger at the Vail Steak House Café and Diner. small chunks of bacon for $6.75. The portion of fried mushrooms ($6.75) was large, but they were mush inside a fried shell. The jalapeño poppers (six to an order for $7.25—that’s a $1.20 per popper!) were still frozen on the inside, and the jalapeños were not even remotely spicy.

Lunch entrées were, thankfully, slightly better, though not great. My mushroom burger ($8.50) with fries, ordered medium-rare, featured a mediocre, dry patty, and was way past well-done. The mushrooms were cooked into oblivion and topped with “Swiss” cheese. I use quotation marks, because it was obviously a processed cheese product that happened to be white instead of yellow. At least the tomato and lettuce were fresh.

Ted’s cheesesteak sandwich ($8.50) was the best of all the dishes we tried, though a bit on the bland side, and with too much bread in the bread-to-filling ratio. The accompanying steakcut fries could have used some seasoning and

Vail Steak House Café and Diner 13005 E. Benson Highway, Vail 762-8777; www.vailsteakhouse.com Open 7 a.m. to 9 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; 6 a.m. to 9 p.m., Saturday and Sunday Pluses: Friendly service Minuses: Bland food; tough steaks

We stopped recently at Sonoran Sno-Cones at Mercado San Agustin (100 S. Avenida del Convento) and tried a Macedonia: four kinds of fruit and three scoops of ice cream for $4.

We’ll be heading back to work through the rest of the menu board. Just down the street is another great spot, Sonoran Delights, 921 W. Congress St., with a selection of cold treats and Mexican street food that’s hard to beat. If you’re on the northwest side of town, stop in for a Tiger’s Blood or one of the other great Hawaiian shave ices at Shoobies Shave Ice, 3701 W. Ina Road. The incredible Oasis Raspados de Frutas, at 1002 W. St. Mary’s Road, is also open and serving the fresh, cold creations that have made it a westside favorite for years.

It’s Back: Mexico City Kitchen another minute or two in the fryer.

If nothing else, the service was friendly— not always prompt, but friendly in that typical roadside-diner kind of way, where the waitresses call everyone “Hon.” In addition to the vast lunch and dinner menus, Vail Steakhouse Café and Diner has a large breakfast menu available until 3 p.m., daily. Perhaps that’s where the magic is. But after having lunch and dinner there, I won’t be finding out.

The small food trailer Mexico City Kitchen recently came back on the scene in a big way. The truck closed some months ago, and nobody heard a peep until it re-emerged a few weeks ago and took home the award for best guacamole at the Tucson Taco Festival.

It’s currently parking near the University of Arizona. Follow it on Facebook for more information.

MAY 17 – 23, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

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Tucson’s

CHOW CARD How it works...

E T H N I C R E S TA U R A N T D I N I N G W W W. T U C S O N C H O W C A R D . C O M

Participating Restaurants...

For only $20, the 2012 Tucson CHOW CARD gives you 2 meals for the price of 1 at over 20 locally owned and operated authentically ethnic and culturally diverse restaurants!

The CHOW CARD is valid at participating Southern Arizona restaurants beginning May 1, 2012 – October 31, 2012

Don Pedro’s Peruvian Bistro (PERU) 3386 S. 6th Avenue ■ 209-1740

Yamato Japanese Restaurant (JAPANESE) 857 E. Grant Road ■ 624-3377

Saffron Indian Bistro (INDIAN) 7607 N. Oracle Road #101 ■ 742-9100

Govinda’s (VEGETARIAN-INTERNATIONAL) 711 E. Blacklidge Drive ■ 792-0630

SAVINGS UP TO $300!

Kababeque Indian Grill (INDIAN) 845 E. University Blvd ■ 388-4500

PURCHASE YOUR CHOW CARD… The 2012 ETHNIC RESTAURANT CHOW CARD will be available for purchase beginning May 1, 2012

Alibaba Restaurant (PERSIAN) 2545 E. Speedway Blvd ■ 319-2559

ONLINE

Amber Restaurant (POLISH) 7000 E. Tanque Verde Road ■ 296-9759

www.tucsonchowcard.com VIA MAIL TUCSON CHOW CARD C/O SAACA 7225 N. Oracle Road, Ste 112 Tucson, AZ 85704

Little Mexico Restaurant and Steakhouse (MEXICAN) 698 W. Irvington Road ■ 573-2924 2851 W. Valencia Road ■ 578-8852

IN PERSON You may purchase your card at the Southern Arizona Arts and Cultural Alliance’s office located at the Northwest corner of Oracle and Ina Rd. The SAACA offices are open Tuesday-Friday from 8:30am-4:30pm.

Southern Arizona Arts and Cultural Alliance 7225 North Oracle Rd, Suite 112, Tucson, AZ 85704

Flavor of India (INDIAN) 12112 N. Rancho Vistoso Blvd #100 544-3005

PHONE The Southern Arizona Arts and Cultural Alliance accepts all major credit cards. Call the Southern Arizona Arts and Cultural Alliance at (520) 797-3959 x 9 to order your CHOW CARD 2012 ETHNIC RESTAURANT CHOW CARD MAIL-IN ORDER FORM (all information is required: orders will be confirmed via email)

2012 CHOW CARD $20.00 x ________________________ = _____________________ Total number of cards

Total amount

Name _______________________________________________________________________ Address _____________________________________________________________________ City _______________________________________ State ___________ Zip _____________ Phone _______________________________ Email_________________________________ ❏ Check or Money Order Enclosed $ ___________________________________________ ❏ Charge my

$ ___________________________________________

Expiration Date ___________________________ 3 Digit Security Code_______________ Account Number _____________________________________________________________ Signature ____________________________________________________________________ 38 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

V Fine Thai Dining (THAI) 9 E. Congress Street ■ 882-8143

My Big Fat Greek Restaurant (GREEK) 7131 E. Broadway Blvd ■ 722-6000 7265 N. La Cholla Blvd ■ 797-7444 Mays Counter (AMERICAN-SOUTHERN) 2945 E. Speedway Blvd ■ 327-2421 Mi Tierra Mexican Restaurante (MEXICAN) 16238 N. Oracle Road ■ 825-3040 D’s Island Grill (Food Truck) (JAMAICAN) SW corner of 6th Ave and Grant Rd La Parilla Suiza (MEXICAN) 4250 W. Ina Road ■ 572-7200 2720 N. Oracle ■ 624-4300 5602 E. Speedway ■ 747-4838

CeeDee Jamaican Kitchen (JAMAICAN) 1070 N. Swan Road ■ 795-3400

2012 Ethnic Restaurant CHOW CARD RESTRICTIONS

■ CHOW Card is valid April 21, 2012 – October 31, 2012 ■ Purchase One Entrée at Full Price, receive another entrée FREE Of equal or lesser value. Maximum discount of $20 on any regular priced entrée ■ Not valid with any other promotions and cannot be combined with any other discounts, happy hour specials or coupons.

■ Only one use per restaurant, per card ■ Valid for Dinner or Lunch only (unless otherwise noted) ■ Remaining savings not used at the end of the promotion, not redeemable for cash ■ Valid only on regular priced entrées (higher price will prevail) ■ Restaurant reserves the right to add up to 18% gratuity based on original bill (prior to discount) ■ Not valid on Holiday’s including: Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, July 4th, Memorial Day, Labor Day ■ Lost, stolen or damaged cards cannot be replaced ■ Issuer is not responsible for restaurant closures ■ Purchased cards are non-refundable ■ Please check the website for details on restrictions and limitations (subject to change). www.tucsonchowcard.com

CHOW SCAN

AMERICANA

Chow Scan is the Weeklyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s selective guide to Tucson restaurants. Only restaurants that our reviewers recommend are included. Complete reviews are online at www.tucsonweekly.com. Dates of reviews from August 1999 to the present are included in Chow Scan. Send comments and updates to: Chow, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726. These listings have no connection with Weekly advertising.

THE ABBEY EAT + DRINK NE 6960 E. Sunrise Drive. 299-3132. Open TuesdayThursday 3-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 4-10 p.m.; Sunday 10:30 a.m.-2 p.m. and 4-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. The Abbey, the â&#x20AC;&#x153;sisterâ&#x20AC;? restaurant to Jax Kitchen, is continuing the trend of dishing up comfort foods with a gourmet twist. With inventive cocktails, a well-balanced wine list and friendly service, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a spot not to be missed. The Abbey burger re-imagines a true American classic in a delightful and delicious way, and desserts are to die for. Reservations are strongly recommended. (1-17-11) $$-$$$

KEY PRICE RANGES $ $8 or less $ $ $8-$15 $ $ $ $15-$25 $ $ $ $ $25 and up.

Prices are based on menu entrĂŠe selections, and exclude alcoholic beverages.

FORMS OF PAYMENT V Visa MC Mastercard AMEX American Express DIS Discover DC Dinerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Club checks local checks with guarantee card and ID only debit debit cards CatCard University of Arizona CatCard.

TYPE OF SERVICE Counter Quick or fast-food service, usually includes take-out.

Diner Minimal table service.

CafĂŠ Your server is most likely working solo.

Bistro Professional servers, with assistants bussing tables.

Full Cover Multiple servers, with the table likely well set.

Full Bar Separate bar space for drinks before and after dinner.

RESTAURANT LOCATION C Central North to River Road, east to Alvernon Way, west to

Granada Avenue downtown, and south to 22nd Street.

mother hubbardâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

BILLâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S GRILL NE Loews Ventana Canyon Resort, 7000 N. Resort

Drive. 299-2020. Open daily 11 a.m. to dusk. Bistro/ Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Great cacti and mountain views make this one of the most memorable spots in town. Take a hike before or after. $$

NE Northeast North of River Road, east of Campbell

Avenue.

E East East of Alvernon Way, south of River Road.

S South South of 22nd Street.

W West West of Granada Avenue, south of River Road.

WINE BARS ARMITAGE WINE LOUNGE AND CAFĂ&#x2030; NW 2905 E. Skyline Drive, No. 168. 682-9740. Open Monday-Friday 11 a.m.-11:30 p.m.; Saturday and Sunday 10 a.m.-11:30 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. A chic dĂŠcor, an impressive (if pricey) wine selection and tasty food await diners at Armitage, yet another impressive La Encantada restaurant. Our brunch experience revealed uniformly bland victuals, but the dishes at dinner ranged from decent to spectacular. If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re an ahi fan, you must try the splendid seared yellowtail with orange soy syrup and wasabi cream. (8-1408) $$$-$$$$ CATAVINOS E 3063 N. Alvernon Way. 323-3063. Open Tuesday

and Wednesday 11 a.m.-6 p.m.; Thursday-Saturday 11 a.m.-8 p.m. Wine Only. MC, V. Discover one of Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most friendly places for wine. On Thursday, Friday, Saturday and every other Wednesday, the folks here pour well-thought-out flights of wine. Conversation is warm, comfortable and certainly not intimidating. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no food (other than cheese, crackers and chocolate to pair with the wine), but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s still a lot of fun. Most bottles are $15 or less. (2-26-09) $-$$

WEEKEND SPECIAL

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s like an online daily newspaper.

Short stack of pine nut/blue corn pancakes served with real maple syrup, 2 eggs and bacon, ham or sausage links.

Except it doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t

suck!

BLUE WILLOW C 2616 N. Campbell Ave. 327-7577. Open Monday-

Friday 7 a.m.-9 p.m.; Saturday and Sunday 8 a.m.-9 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. A Tucson institution, Blue Willow set the standard for wholesome fare Ă la the 1970s: omelets, quiche, crĂŠpes, homemade soups and tofu scrambles. Today, the restaurant continues to shine due to a joyful dedication to quality and a chocolate du jour dessert dish that hits the spot every time. Great outdoor patio and nifty gift shop. (1216-99) $-$$

Serving Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Most Unique Breakfasts and Brunches

Visit The Range at daily.tucsonweekly.com

8 (3"/5 3% t IN THE GRANTSTONE PLAZA Mon - Sat 6am -2pm Sunday 7am - 2 pm

BOBOâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S RESTAURANT C 2938 E. Grant Road. 326-6163. Open daily 5:30 a.m.-2 p.m. Diner/No Alcohol. MC, V. Long a favorite breakfast spot, Boboâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s serves up enough ham, eggs and pancakes to feed all of Tucson. Lunch specials are iffy, but breakfastâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;especially the omeletsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;is outstanding. $ BREAD AND BUTTER CAFĂ&#x2030; E 4231 E. 22nd St., No. 101. 327-0004. Open Monday-Saturday 5 a.m.-2 p.m.; Sunday 7 a.m.-1 p.m.

CafĂŠ/Diner/No Alcohol. MC, V. For a cheap, fast breakfast or lunch, the Bread and Butter CafĂŠ is a longtime Tucson favorite (although the joint doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t serve butter; go figure). The coffee cup is bottomless and constantly refilled; the eggs are cooked perfectly to order. Be sure to save room for a â&#x20AC;&#x153;wedgeâ&#x20AC;? of homemade pie; dessert is where this cafĂŠ really excels. Expect a wait during peak weekend hours. (4-9-09) $ BUDDYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S GRILL E 7385 S. Houghton Road. 881-2226. Open SundayThursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-midnight Bistro/Full Bar. DC, DIS, MC, V, Checks.

Everything from burgers to sophisticated hickory-grilled seafood entrĂŠes are well-prepared and served with panache. $$

NW Northwest North of River Road, west of Campbell

Avenue.

cafe native american comfort food southwestern comfor t food

BUFFET AT THE DESERT DIAMOND CASINO AND HOTEL S 7350 S. Nogales Highway. 342-1327. Open MondaySaturday 11 a.m.-2 p.m. and 4-9 p.m.; Sunday 10 a.m.-2 p.m. (champagne brunch) and 4-9 p.m. Counter/ Specialty Drinks. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. A lot of the food here is buffet-bland, yet hardly anything is less-thanaverage in quality in a surprisingly restful setting. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a decent respite from your casino exertions. (1-7-09) $$

El Mariachi BURGER

OF THE MONTH 431 N. 4TH AVE â&#x20AC;˘ 520.207.6970 â&#x20AC;˘ WWW.LO4TH.COM

BAT T L I N G A N O R E X I A O N E C H E E S E BU R G E R AT A T I M E

CAFE TREMOLO NW 7401 N. La Cholla Blvd., No. 152. 742-2999.

Open daily 11 a.m.-9 p.m. CafĂŠ/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Cafe Tremolo is like a Tucson version of the Hard Rock CafĂŠâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;except with better food. Beautifully presented entrĂŠes, sandwiches and desserts make this an ideal lunch or dinner spot, and if you know anything about classic rock or jazz, you can geek out at the awesome collection of music memorabilia. Friendly service and a full bar make the experience complete. (9-16-10) $$

Serving Tucson Since 1982

CHAFFINâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S FAMILY RESTAURANT C 902 E. Broadway Blvd. 882-7707. Open daily 6 a.m.-

2 p.m. Diner/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Homemade mashed potatoes. Good chicken-fried steak. Homemade desserts. This is what greasy-spoon dining is supposed to be like. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t let the ugly, aged decor deter you!

(5-22-03) $-$$ CLAIM JUMPER C 3761 E. Broadway Blvd. 795-2900. Open SundayThursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. At Claim Jumper, you can expect several things: a wait to be seated, terrific service and portion sizes large enough

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.com

6530 E Tanque Verde â&#x20AC;˘ Milliespancakehaus.com MAY 17 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 23, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

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AMERICANA

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 39

to feed entire small villages. The décor at this Californiabased chain reminds one of an oversized ski lodge, including lots of wood and a chandelier made of antlers.

The food is decent—you can’t go wrong with the salads and the ribs—and be prepared to take a ton of leftovers home. (6-2-05) $$$-$$$$ CODY’S BEEF ’N’ BEANS C 2708 E. Fort Lowell Road. 322-9475. Open MondaySaturday 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Café/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Grab your cowboy hat, boots and best gal or guy, and head on down to this down-home cowboy heaven. Great cuts of beef and pork done up just right are served with some mighty-fine spicy cowboy beans.

Casual to the core, Cody’s is the place to get quality steaks at moderate prices. (10-28-04) $-$$ COYOTE PAUSE CAFÉ W Cat Mountain Station, 2740 S. Kinney Road. 883-

7297. Open Sunday-Thursday 7:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 7:30 a.m.-8 p.m. Café/Beer and Wine. AMEX, MC, V. It’s out of the way for most folks, but if you’re on your way to or from Old Tucson or the Desert Museum, Coyote Pause dishes up reliable breakfast and lunch café standards with a subtle individual touch. (6-5-08) $ CUSHING STREET RESTAURANT AND BAR C 198 W. Cushing St. 622-7984. Open Tuesday-

Thursday 4:30-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 4:30-10 p.m. Café/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. This long-time bar and restaurant offers a pleasant way to enjoy uptown, down-home food while soaking up some local history.

Spring nights on the patio can be quite romantic. While it’s a bit off the beaten path, once you’ve been there, you’ll want to go back, even for a few drinks after a night at the Convention Center. Plenty of free parking.

(3-11-04) $$-$$$ DEB’S CONEY CAFÉ C 110 S. Church Ave. 624-5027. Open Monday-Friday

7:30 a.m.-2 p.m. Café/No Alcohol. MC, V. Serving nine different types of hot dogs, Deb’s Coney Café dogs the Old Pueblo in grand style. (3-1-01) $ DOWNTOWN KITCHEN + COCKTAILS C 135 S. Sixth Ave. 623-7700. Open Sunday-

Wednesday 11 a.m.-9:30 a.m.; Thursday-Saturday 11 a.m.-1 a.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. There is much to like about Janos Wilder’s return to downtown. He’s taken American cuisine and infused it with foreign influences in a delightfully urban setting.

The service is top-notch, and don’t miss the “at the bar” menu. (3-10-11) $$-$$$$ DRY RIVER COMPANY E 800 N. Kolb Road. 298-5555. Open Monday-

&

WINE BAR

LATE NIGHT SLICES Friday & Saturdays 10pm – 1am

$

3 per Slice 2 for $5

$3.50 Pints $9.50 Pitchers $1.00 Off Well Drinks

FA S T, F R E S H A N D F R O M S C R A T C H P I Z Z A

PIZZERIA

58 W. Congress St 623-0744 40 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

Thursday 7 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday 7 a.m.-1 a.m.; Saturday 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 11:30 a.m.-8 p.m.

Counter/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This is a nifty little place that offers everything from light breakfasts to delicious pizzas to happy hour and beyond. Baked goods include scones, cupcakes, cookies, brownies cheesecake and more; enjoy these with one of the specialty coffees.

Pizzas are baked in a wood-fired oven; toppings include all the old standbys as well as twists like potatoes.

Sandwiches, salads and pastas round out the menu.

(11-18-10) $-$$ EAT-A-BURGER C 100 N. Stone Ave. 445-4700. Open Monday-

Thursday 8:30 a.m.-3 p.m.; Friday 8:30 a.m.-7 p.m.; Saturday 11 a.m.-7 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. DIS, MC, V. Eat-a-Burger, the food truck, is now Eat-a-Burger, the restaurant. Located in the Pioneer Building, it’s an easy stop-in for a quick, simple and tasty downtown lunch or breakfast. The menu is small but well-executed, and the service comes with a smile. Limited breakfast hours (8-10:30 a.m.) are difficult for the downtown crowd, but the breakfast sandwiches offer a definite bang for your buck (or two). (11-24-11) $ FIREBIRDS WOOD FIRED GRILL NW 2985 E. Skyline Drive. 577-0747. Open Sunday-

Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. This Rocky Mountain-themed restaurant chain’s headquarters are in North Carolina—go figure—but regardless of their geographical confusion, the Firebirds folks know how to grill up a top-notch steak. The service is friendly and efficient, too. At the midprice level in Tucson, restaurants don’t get much better than this.

(8-11-05) $$$-$$$$ FRANK’S RESTAURANT C 3843 E. Pima St. 881-2710. Open Monday-Friday 6

a.m.-2 p.m.; Saturday 7 a.m.-2 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.2 p.m. Café/No Alcohol. MC, V. There’s nothing fancy or extravagant in the way Frank’s does business, but if you like a hearty, homestyle meal served with lots of hot, strong coffee, real honest-to-goodness mashed

potatoes and hash browns and eggs cooked the way you like them, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll love this place. Ample portions, brisk service and affordable prices ensure constant popularity.

(1-6-00) $ THE GOOD EGG E 7189 E. Speedway Blvd. 885-4838. Open daily 6:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. AMEX, MC, V. Also at 4775 E. Grant Road (795-7879), 5350 E. Broadway Blvd. (512-0280) and 5055 N. Oracle Road (2936139). The Good Egg works with several variations on a theme to provide an outstanding menu of breakfast and lunch fare. Even people on a restricted diet can find something to eat here, while those who envision a stack of pancakes will be astounded at the platter-sized monsters that come to their table begging for a maplesyrup bath. $ GUS BALONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S RESTAURANT E 6027 E. 22nd St. 748-9731. Open Monday-Saturday

7 a.m.-3 p.m. CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. Cash and checks. Enjoy a hearty breakfast in the grand tradition of eggs fried in butter and french toast made with large slices of white bread. The prices are beyond economical, the service warm and friendly and the coffee cups bottomless. Be sure to try the pies and cinnamon rolls. $ HOT ROD CAFĂ&#x2030;

JERRY BOBâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S E 5028 E. Broadway Blvd. 326-0301. Open daily

5:30 a.m.-2 p.m. CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V, Checks. Also at 7699 E. Speedway Blvd. (298-5030), 7885 E. Golf Links Road (721-8888), 2680 E. Valencia Road (807-5717), 8300 N. Thornydale Road (5797177), 7939 N. Oracle Road (878-9360), 3601 N. Campbell Ave. (319-5642), 7850 N. Silverbell Road (579-0937) and 7545 S. Houghton Road, No. 155 (574-9060). (Hours and methods of payment vary per location.) Like a blast from the past, Jerry Bobâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s renews our acquaintance with the kind of breakfast your mother once said would â&#x20AC;&#x153;stick to your ribsâ&#x20AC;?: lots of egg specialties, grits, biscuits and gravy, and chicken-fried steak.

What more do you need to time travel to a kinder, gentler, less cholesterol-conscious era? $

C 2831 N. Stone Ave. 903-2233. Open Monday-Friday

8:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. DIS, MC, V. Simple but tasty sandwiches, salads and breakfast items make the Hot Rod CafĂŠ a worthwhile place to stop in and grab a quick bite to eat. There is a bright, racing-themed dĂŠcor, lots of cool automotive memorabilia and service with a smile. The sandwiches are reminiscent of the food you might have found in your lunchbox once upon a time.

Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t pass up the opportunity to order a root-beer float or an old-fashioned milkshake. (1-27-11) $ THE HUNGRY FOX RESTAURANT AND COUNTRY STORE E 4637 E. Broadway Blvd. 326-2835. Open MondayFriday 6 a.m.-2 p.m.; Saturday and Sunday 6:30 a.m.-2 p.m. Diner/No Alcohol. MC, V. Great breakfasts are served all day with double-yolk eggs, golden hash browns and fluffy bread made from scratch. The lunches are for those who miss Momâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cooking, and the waitresses are all professional mama-surrogates. $

â&#x20AC;&#x153;A TASTE OF LEBANONâ&#x20AC;?

JAX KITCHEN NW 7286 N. Oracle Road. 219-1235. Open TuesdayFriday 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 5-9 p.m.; Saturday 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 5-10 p.m.; Sunday 5-9 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Jax Kitchenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s menu offers a fine, playful balance of great stuff. Fresh, quality ingredients are present in such a way that youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll remember each and every bite. The mussels and frites shine, and anything from the garden will please. Throw in pleasant service, moderate prices and a cool vibe, and you have a Tucson favorite. (12-4-08) $$-$$$

JETHROâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S LITTLE CAFE E 8585 E. Broadway Blvd. 886-1091. Open daily 6 a.m.-2 p.m. CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. MC, V. If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re looking for good eats and lots of them, this may just be your ideal place. The food is made fresh from scratch, and the portions will blow you away. Breakfasts include everything from biscuits and gravy to Belgian waffles. At lunch, both salad-lovers and fried-food fanatics will be happy. Service is down-home, just as one would expect.

(9-10-09) $ KON TIKI E 4625 E. Broadway Blvd. 323-7193. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-1 a.m.; Friday and Saturday 10 a.m.- 2 a.m.; Sunday 10 a.m.-midnight. Food served Monday-Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. This tiki lounge has been around since 1963, largely due to the famous cold, fruity and lethal drinks. Appetizers are a consistent hit, while lunch and dinner entrĂŠes are hit or miss.

Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t miss out on the happy-hour appetizer and drink specials. (7-2-09) $$-$$$

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Falafel Sandwich $1.99 Chicken Shawarma Sandwich $3.99 Beef Shawarma Sandwich $3.99

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TuCsONWEEKLY

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42 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

MUSIC

SOUNDBITES

Montreal’s Plants and Animals lowered the pressure to record their third full-length album

By Stephen Seigel, musiced@tucsonweek musiced@tucsonweekly.com

Wonderful Bubble

Jason Pierce of Spiritualized Plants and Animals

BY ERIC SWEDLUND, mailbag@tucsonweekly.com tress wouldn’t seem to be a problem at an old manor outside of Paris. But despite the wine, the cheese and the picturesque countryside, Plants and Animals found themselves with frayed nerves instead of focus.

The Montreal indie-rock trio decided on a new process to record their third album, working longer and more carefully on songwriting before setting foot inside La Frette Studios. With time running short and pressure mounting, the band wasn’t getting things right. So when a neighbor complained about the rock music interfering with his holiday family reunion, the forced break was just what the band needed.

“Stress is the enemy when you’re in front of a microphone, because you can hear it afterward,” says drummer Matthew Woodley. “…

We extended our plane tickets for a few days and decided to take advantage of that time, and it just made us work differently, and it started to make us have more fun.”

The loose vibe on The End of That comes from that low-pressure situation and the “bubble” the band got to work in with engineer Lionel Darenne (who recorded Feist’s The Reminder at the same studio). Woodley describes La Frette as “somewhere between this great big grandiose mansion and a country home,” with paint peeling from the walls and great high ceilings.

“The place you’re in when you’re doing something can shape the outcome a lot, and this house was a wicked place to be creative in,” he says. “I can’t imagine this place being anywhere other than in France, because of the flavor and feel and architecture and the bread and cheese and wine, but I don’t think it was France that inspired the record. It was this wonderful bubble we were in.”

The band recorded almost entirely live (as opposed to multi-tracking), working out the songs ahead of time instead of using the studio to flesh out ideas as they’d done in the past.

“We wanted to avoid a lot of postproduction and just sound like three people playing together straight-up. This time, we can see the whole picture, and it’s more of a question of execution. It’s liberating,” Woodley says.

Plants and Animals started a decade ago as a strictly instrumental trio, good friends playing music together just for the enjoyment.

Woodley, multi-instrumentalist Warren Spicer and lead guitarist Nicolas Basque did that for five years, recording two EPs before putting together their debut album, Parc Avenue, and going out into the world as a touring band.

Woodley describes the band’s instrumental period as experimental and even a bit wanky.

S

TUCSON FINALLY GETS SPIRITUALIZED

“Because of that, we got good at playing our instruments together, and we didn’t worry about writing hits or even singing,” he says. “That’s always going to be there as a foundation of what we do. I can’t imagine it any other way.”

Parc Avenue was nominated for the 2008 Polaris Music Prize, and its follow-up, La La Land, also made it to the 40-album-long list for the top Canadian album prize. But despite such early success, the band wanted to strike out in a different direction for the new album.

“We’ve always done a lot in the studio,” Woodley says. “We spent two years making our first album, and the second time, we also did a lot of writing in the studio. We thought it’d be better to look at the material, and the decisions end up different.”

The End of That is a record that takes a look at adulthood and growing up, with Spicer’s lyrics talking about facing down an “existential crisis.”

“They’re pretty direct and blunt. It’s about a time in life. When you first hear the title of the record, it can sound dark and ominous, but it’s not,” Woodley says. “I think the lyrics come across as having a beer with a friend at the end of the day. It’s an ending, but it’s also a celebration.”

“Well holy matrimony! / Everyone is getting married or breaking up / And the stroller situation on the sidewalk is way out of control,” Spicer sings on “Crisis!” as he describes the difficulty of relating to peers who have embarked on more-traditional paths than that of a rock ’n’ roll band.

On “No Idea,” it’s Spicer asking, “Do you fear loneliness? Do you fear getting left behind? All your friends are getting married and having a time?”

Woodley says the lyrics shouldn’t be read as a diary, but more as a general description of the questions a lot of people deal with about

Plants and Animals with Golden Boots and OHIOAN 7 p.m., Wednesday, May 23 Club Congress 311 E. Congress St. $10 622-8848; hotelcongress.com/club

maturity and adulthood. And there’s still an optimistic thread that runs through the songs.

“We’re not opposed to families and strollers or anything like that; it’s just more like, ‘Oh shit, what’s happening?’ That’s the existential crisis that Warren is poking at. But it’s all done with a wink and a grain of salt,” Woodley says.

Musically, The End of That finds the band updating vintage rock ’n’ roll styles of greats like the Band, the Grateful Dead and Crazy Horse, alternately rootsy and psychedelic, equally comfortable in frantic jams and simple folk. It’s the same type of alternative-history classic rock played by contemporaries like Blitzen Trapper, Dr. Dog and The War on Drugs, slicing and shuffling big-name influences into a sound that’s familiar and even recognizable, yet impossible to pin down.

Woodley says that the more careful songwriting/preparation and the live recording of The End of That have the band the closest it’s ever been to playing the songs onstage as they sound on the album. And once again, those instrumental roots become a big strength as the band heads out on tour.

“I like being onstage and playing to people who are listening in the moment. Personally, it’s my favorite,” Woodley says. “I find it to be harder in the studio, because you listen to yourself playing more. We all love playing live.

That’s where we’re at our best.”

Live-music fans living in Tucson must accept at least a slight form of diminished expectations: There are certain acts that will never perform here—bands that one expects to need to drive to Phoenix, or maybe even Los Angeles, to see.

Maybe the band is just too big, and they demand enough money per performance that Tucson audiences would never accept the high ticket prices that would accompany such an act. Maybe the band rarely tours, and when it does, it sticks to those bigger, primary markets.

The latter has been the case with Spiritualized, who will perform in Tucson this week for the first time since its inception in 1990. The band emerged out of the ashes of Spacemen 3, a dronerock band that embraced minimalism and drug references in equal measure. The core of that band was the duo of Pete Kember (aka Sonic Boom) and Jason Pierce (aka J. Spaceman), and when they broke up, Pierce quickly assembled the first version of Spiritualized, which kept some of Spacemen 3’s qualities intact, but messed with others.

Like Spacemen 3, Spiritualized keep basic song structures to a minimum: Three chords is plenty. There are also still plenty of drug references in the songs, but Spiritualized adds doses of the sacred to the profane in the form of allusions to Jesus and gospel, or—dare I say—spiritual elements: choirs, for example. And then there are Pierce’s arrangements and production, which can transform a three-chord song into something else entirely—a countermelody here (check out the title track to 1997’s Ladies and Gentlemen … We Are Floating in Space, in which one of the melodies somehow morphs into “Can’t Help Falling in Love” by song’s end); a gospel motif, string section or horn chart there.

If that’s your sort of thing, Spiritualized have never really made a bad album, and their seventh and latest, Sweet Heart, Sweet Light (Fat Possum, 2012), continues in that tradition.

Pierce has tinkered with the basic formula before, giving 1995’s Pure Phase completely separate mixes in the left and right channels, for example, but on Sweet Heart, he chooses to perfect the formula rather than toy with it.

Most of the album is slow or midtempo, which is consistent with the Spiritualized M.O., but it opens with one of the band’s faster-paced songs, the nine-minute rocker “Hey Jane,” which achieves transcendence without the gospel choir.

But that’s not indicative of what’s in store on the rest of the album, in which the pace is slowed to what we’ve come to expect from Spiritualized. If it contained a few more layers of guitars, the Eastern motif of “Get What You Deserve” might resemble the shoegaze of My Bloody Valentine. With its gorgeous string build-up, “Too Late” could be a track from a mid-’90s Mercury Rev album.

In other words, Pierce’s genius is taking a song constructed quite basically and adding layer upon

CONTINUED ON PAGE 45 MAY 17 – 23, 2012

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SOUNDBITES CONTINUED

Holy Rolling Empire

from P from Page agee 43 ag

TOP TEN The 17th Street Guitar and World Music Store’s top sales for the week ending May 11, 2012 layer of flourishes that render it something full and beautiful—deceptively simple yet gloriously complicated.

Spiritualized perform at the Rialto Theatre, 318 E. Congress St., on Friday, May 18. The all-ages show begins at 8 p.m. with an opening set by Nikki Lane. Tickets are $22 in advance, or $25 on the day of the show. For more information, call 740-1000, or head to rialtotheatre.com.

THE EVOLUTION OF MORRISSEY Morrissey, the legendary British solo artist and former singer-songwriter for The Smiths, seems to visit Tucson every five years. He performed at the Rialto in August 2002, and the Tucson Convention Center Music Hall in 2007. This week, he returns to the Music Hall—five years later, on perfect schedule.

A funny thing happened between those two aforementioned performances. At the Rialto show, he still seemed to be trying to outrun his Smiths legacy, performing only a couple of songs by his former band. But by the 2007 show, he seemed more comfortable—looser, even—as he dodged fan after fan charging the stage to give him a hug, offer him a flower or propose marriage. He also divvied up the set list not quite evenly between solo songs and Smiths classics. It was something of a greatest-hits set, and the devoted listeners hung on every move by the charismatic frontman.

Let’s face it: As far as a catalog of songs goes, Morrissey’s is tough to top. Straddling the line between the morbid/melancholy and the intellectually hilarious, Morrissey’s songwriting has influenced a generation or two that came after him, but no one has yet come close to approaching a perfect Morrissey song (no matter how hard The Decemberists may try).

I won’t predict what will be on the set list when Morrissey returns this week, but it doesn’t really matter. His fans are slavishly devoted, often following him on tour like alt-nation Deadheads, and you can bet they’d be in attendance even if the show were being touted as “Morrissey performs Kill Uncle in its entirety.”

Morrissey performs at the TCC Music Hall, 260 S. Church Ave., at 8:30 p.m., Wednesday, May 23. Kristeen Young opens the all-ages show at 8:30 p.m. Tickets range from $39.50 to $127.50, plus service charges, and are available through Ticketmaster or at the venue box office. For further info, call 791-4101.

SUPPORT MORE LOCAL RADIO! A local group has been getting its ducks in a row to start a low-power FM radio station (LPFM) in downtown Tucson. One of the group’s founders, Jason LeValley, says that the station is intended to be housed within the Access Tucson building, which will allow radio and TV simulcasts of live performances and such. This is all dependent on the Federal Communications

Commission’s approval of a license for such a station, of course, but LeValley reports to us that “it’s safe to say that we are way ahead of the curve in terms of being able to submit an impressive application. With a little luck, we will be on the air in early 2013.”

Ask the folks at KXCI FM 91.3, and they’ll tell you that even with a bare-bones operation such as theirs, you need an infusion of cash to keep the station on the air—which is why there will be a benefit show for the LPFM station this week.

The event will take place at 10 p.m., Friday, May 18, at La Cocina, 201 N. Court Ave. Headlining the bill will be Holy Rolling Empire, whose singer, Orin Shochat, will be making his last performance with the band as a Tucson resident (he’s moving to Los Angeles; the band will continue, but expect local shows to become far more rare). Blind Divine and The Wolfgang will perform at the benefit prior to HRE. Admission is a suggested donation of $5.

For more information, head to lacocinatucson. com, or call 622-0351.

1. Summerdog 1978–1982 (self-released)

2. Grams and Krieger No, You! (Firesweep)

THURSDAY MAY 17 - LOGAN GREENE ELECTRIC, PAGE OF CUPS SATURDAY MAY 19 - DREAM SICK, ST. RANGER TUESDAY MAY 22 - LIVE JAZZ WITH JAZZ TELEPHONE THURSDAY MAY 24 - TRACEY SHEDD, ADAM NIXON SATURDAY MAY 26 - LA CERCA, SHAUN HARRIS

3. Pablo Peregrina Traveling Soles (self-released)

4. Rich Hopkins and Luminarios Buried Treasures (San Jacinto)

5. Ron DeVous Hot Samba Nights (self-released)

6. Ron Doering The Balladeer (self-released)

7. Silver Thread Trio Trigger and Scythe (Prophette)

8. Gabriel Sullivan

SHORT TAKES The third installment of the quarterly series ChamberLab—for which composer-musician Chris Black asks local musicians who perform other styles of music to compose chambermusic pieces, which are then performed live once—arrives this week. The composers this time around, in addition to Black, are Marco Rosano, Dante Rosano and Benjamin DeGain (Discos). And, hell, when was the last time you went to a show in which a contrabassoon was a primary instrument?

ChamberLab returns to Club Congress, 311 E. Congress St., on Saturday, May 19. Doors open at 8 p.m., and cover is $5. For more info, head to hotelcongress.com/club.

While it’s certainly accurate to call the legendary Taj Mahal a bluesman, it’s also hard to name another blues performer who has infused the style with as many outside influences over the years—something of a rarity for the blues.

But check out his catalog, and you’ll find diversions into jazz, reggae, gospel, African and Latin influences. He may not be a purist, but he’s still one hell of a bluesman.

Taj Mahal performs at the Fox Tucson Theatre, 17 W. Congress St., next Thursday, May 24. The show begins at 7:30 p.m., and tickets, available at the venue’s box office or online at foxtucsontheatre.org, range from $28 to $86. For more information, call 547-3040.

By the Dirt (Fell City)

9. Chris Burton Jácome Pa’lante (self-released)

10. New Riders of the Purple Sage 17 Pine Avenue (Woodstock)

Summerdog

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MON: TEAM TRIVIA @ 7pm: Compete for Gift Cards to Brooklyn Pizza Co! Game Night, Free Pool Open - Close Happy Hour TUES: Family evening w/$8.88 Cheese Pizzas Free Pool from 8pm - Close Live Jazz, Drink Specials!

WED: Open Mic 6pm - Close THURS: $2 Full Sail Drafts. $3 Fireball Cinnamon Whiskey Live Music - No Cover!

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Fire Dancers 7:30pm & 8:30pm O/W/L/S presents HOT ERA. DANCE. DRINK. FUN. $2 Well Vodka from 11pm-1am

SAT:

Live Music - No Cover!

SUN:

Open to Close Happy Hour!

ON THE BANDWAGON We’ve run out of room here, so be sure to check our listings for info about other great shows this week, including performances by Rebecca Gates and the Consortium; Sierra Leone’s Refugee All Stars; Lil Flip; Pennywise and Guttermouth; Khaira Arby; The Shondes; Cumbia Machin; Twiztid and Kottonmouth Kings; Heather Hardy and the Lil’ Mama Band and TJ Swan; and lots, lots more.

MAY 17 – 23, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

45

CLUB LIST Here is a list of venues that offer live music, dancing, DJ music, karaoke or comedy in the Tucson area. We recommend that you call and confirm all events.

DON’S BAYOU CAJUN COOKIN’ 8991 E. Tanque Verde Road.

749-4410.

AMADO TERRITORY STEAKHOUSE 3001 E. Frontage Road. Amado. 398-2651.

EDDIES COCKTAILS 8510 E. Broadway Blvd. 290-8750.

R PLACE BAR AND GRILL 3412 N. Dodge Blvd. 881-9048.

KNOW WHERE 2 1308 W. Glenn St. 623-3999.

RA SUSHI BAR RESTAURANT 2905 E. Skyline Drive. 615-3970.

KON TIKI 4625 E. Broadway Blvd.

323-7193.

RAGING SAGE COFFEE ROASTERS 2458 N. Campbell Ave. 320-5203.

DRY RIVER COMPANY 800 N. Kolb Road. 298-5555.

LAFFS COMEDY CAFFÉ 2900 E. Broadway Blvd. 323-8669.

DV8 5851 E. Speedway Blvd.

885-3030.

LAS CAZUELITAS 1365 W. Grant Road. 206-0405.

ECLIPSE AT COLLEGE PLACE 1601 N. Oracle Road. 209-2121.

LEVEL BAR LOUNGE 4280 N. Campbell Ave., Suite 37.

615-3835.

LI’L ABNER’S STEAKHOUSE 8500 N. Silverbell Road.

744-2800.

REDLINE SPORTS GRILL 445 W. Wetmore Road. 888-8084.

LE RENDEZ-VOUS 3844 E. Fort Lowell Road. 323-7373.

RIALTO THEATRE 318 E. Congress St. 740-1000.

RIC’S CAFE/RESTAURANT 5605 E. River Road. 577-7272.

ARIZONA INN 2200 E. Elm St. 325-1541.

EL CHARRO CAFÉ SAHUARITA 15920 S. Rancho Sahuarita.

Sahuarita. 325-1922.

ARMITAGE WINE LOUNGE AND CAFÉ 2905 E. Skyline Drive, No. 168. 682-9740.

EL CHARRO CAFÉ ON BROADWAY 6310 E. Broadway Blvd. 745-1922.

THE AULD DUBLINER 800 E. University Blvd. 206-0323.

EL MEZÓN DEL COBRE 2960 N. First Ave. 791-0977.

AZUL RESTAURANT LOUNGE Westin La Paloma, 3800 E. Sunrise Drive. 742-6000.

EL PARADOR 2744 E. Broadway Blvd. 881-2744.

LOOKOUT BAR AND GRILLE AT WESTWARD LOOK RESORT 245 E. Ina Road. 297-1151.

ELBOW ROOM 1145 W. Prince Road. 690-1011.

THE LOOP TASTE OF CHICAGO 10180 N. Oracle Road. 878-0222.

THE ROCK 136 N. Park Ave. 629-9211.

ENOTECA PIZZERIA WINE BAR 58 W. Congress St. 623-0744.

LOTUS GARDEN RESTAURANT 5975 E. Speedway Blvd.

298-3351.

ROYAL SUN INN AND SUITES 1015 N. Stone Ave. 622-8871.

THE BAMBOO CLUB 5870 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 524.

514-9665.

THE BASHFUL BANDIT 3686 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-8996.

BEAU BRUMMEL CLUB 1148 N. Main Ave. 622-9673.

FAMOUS SAM’S BROADWAY 1830 E. Broadway Blvd.

884-0119.

LIQUOR BARREL SALOON 6925 E. Broadway Blvd. 886-8118.

LOEWS VENTANA CANYON RESORT 7000 N. Resort Drive.

299-2020.

LUNA BELLA ITALIAN CUISINE AND CATERING 2990 N. Swan Road, No. 145. 325-3895.

BEDROXX 4385 W. Ina Road.

744-7655.

FAMOUS SAM’S E. GOLF LINKS 7129 E. Golf Links Road.

296-1245.

BEST WESTERN ROYAL SUN INN AND SUITES 1015 N. Stone Ave. 622-8871.

FAMOUS SAM’S SILVERBELL 2320 N. Silverbell Road.

884-7267.

BLUEFIN SEAFOOD BISTRO 7053 N. Oracle Road. 531-8500.

FAMOUS SAM’S VALENCIA 3010 W. Valencia Road. 883-8888.

MAVERICK 6622 E. Tanque Verde Road. 298-0430.

BOJANGLES SALOON 5244 S. Nogales Highway. 889-6161.

FAMOUS SAM’S W. RUTHRAUFF 2480 W. Ruthrauff Road.

292-0492.

MAYNARDS MARKET AND KITCHEN 400 N. Toole Ave. 545-0577.

FAMOUS SAM’S IRVINGTON 2048 E. Irvington Road. 889-6007.

MCMAHON’S PRIME STEAKHOUSE 2959 N. Swan Road. 327-7463.

BOONDOCKS LOUNGE 3306 N. First Ave. 690-0991.

BORDERLANDS BREWING COMPANY 119 E. Toole Ave. 261-8773.

THE BRANDING IRON RUTHRAUFF 2660 W. Ruthrauff Road. 888-9452.

BRATS 5975 W. Western Way Circle. 578-0341.

BRODIE’S TAVERN 2449 N. Stone Ave. 622-0447.

BUFFALO WILD WINGS 68 N. Harrison Road. 296-8409.

FAMOUS SAM’S ORACLE 8058 N. Oracle Road. 531-9464.

FAMOUS SAM’S PIMA 3933 E. Pima St. 323-1880.

FLYING V BAR AND GRILL Loews Ventana Canyon Resort, 7000 N. Resort Drive. 299-2020.

FOX AND HOUND SMOKEHOUSE AND TAVERN Foothills Mall, 7625 N. La Cholla Blvd. 575-1980.

FROG AND FIRKIN 874 E. University Blvd. 623-7507.

MALIBU YOGURT AND ICE CREAM 825 E. University Blvd.

903-2340.

MARGARITA BAY 7415 E. 22nd St. 290-8977.

MIDTOWN BAR AND GRILL 4915 E. Speedway Blvd. 327-2011.

MINT COCKTAILS 3540 E. Grant Road. 881-9169.

MONTEREY COURT STUDIO GALLERIES 505 W. Miracle Mile.

582-0514.

MR. AN’S TEPPAN STEAK AND SUSHI 6091 N. Oracle Road.

797-0888.

RILEY’S IRISH TAVERN 5140 N. La Cholla Blvd. 408-0507.

RIVER’S EDGE LOUNGE 4635 N. Flowing Wells Road. 887-9027.

RJ’S REPLAYS SPORTS PUB AND GRUB 5769 E. Speedway Blvd.

495-5136.

ROCK N’ JAVA 7555 W. Twin Peaks Road. Marana. 572-5738.

RUSTY’S FAMILY RESTAURANT AND SPORTS GRILLE 2075 W. Grant Road. 623-3363.

SAKURA 6534 E. Tanque Verde Road. 298-7777.

SALTY DAWG II 6121 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 106. 790-3294.

SAM HUGHES PLACE CHAMPIONSHIP DINING 446 N. Campbell Ave. 747-5223.

SAPPHIRE LOUNGE 61 E. Congress St. 624-9100.

SHARKS 256 E. Congress St. 791-9869.

SHERATON HOTEL AND SUITES 5151 E. Grant Road. 323-6262.

SHOOTERS STEAKHOUSE AND SALOON 3115 E. Prince Road.

322-0779.

SHOT IN THE DARK CAFÉ 121 E. Broadway Blvd. 882-5544.

SINBAD’S FINE MEDITERRANEAN CUISINE 810 E. University Ave. 623-4010.

SKY BAR 536 N. Fourth Ave. 622-4300.

LA FUENTE 1749 N. Oracle Road.

623-8659.

MR. HEAD’S ART GALLERY AND BAR 513 N. Fourth Ave. 792-2710.

THE SKYBOX RESTAURANT AND SPORTS BAR 5605 E. River Road.

529-7180.

FUKU SUSHI 940 E. University Blvd. 798-3858.

MUSIC BOX 6951 E. 22nd St. 747-1421.

SOLAR CULTURE 31 E. Toole Ave. 884-0874.

GENTLE BEN’S BREWING COMPANY 865 E. University Blvd.

624-4177.

NEVADA SMITH’S 1175 W. Miracle Mile. 622-9064.

STADIUM GRILL 3682 W. Orange Grove Road. Marana. 877-8100.

NEW MOON TUCSON 915 W. Prince Road. 293-7339.

STOCKMEN’S LOUNGE 1368 W. Roger Road. 887-2529.

GOLD Westward Look Resort, 245 E. Ina Road. 917-2930, ext. 474.

NIMBUS BREWING COMPANY TAPROOM 3850 E. 44th St. 745-9175.

SULLIVAN’S STEAK HOUSE 1785 E. River Road. 299-4275.

GOLDEN PIN LANES 1010 W. Miracle Mile. 888-4272.

NORTH 2995 E. Skyline Drive.

299-1600.

CIRCLE S SALOON 16001 W. El Tiro Road. Marana. 682-5377.

THE GRILL AT QUAIL CREEK 1490 Quail Range Loop. Green Valley. 393-5806.

O’MALLEY’S 247 N. Fourth Ave. 623-8600.

CLUB CENTRO (AT V FINE THAI DINING) 9 E. Congress St.

GUADALAJARA GRILL EAST 750 N. Kolb Road. 296-1122.

CLUB CONGRESS 311 E. Congress St. 622-8848.

GUADALAJARA GRILL WEST 1220 E. Prince Road. 323-1022.

LA COCINA RESTAURANT, CANTINA AND COFFEE BAR 201 N. Court Ave. 622-0351.

HACIENDA DEL SOL 5601 N. Hacienda del Sol Road. 299-1501.

CACTUS MOON 5470 E. Broadway Blvd. 748-0049.

CAFÉ PASSÉ 415 N. Fourth Ave. 624-4411.

THE CANYON’S CROWN RESTAURANT AND PUB 6958 E. Tanque Verde Road. 885-8277.

CASA VICENTE RESTAURANTE ESPAÑOL 375 S. Stone Ave. 884-5253.

CASCADE LOUNGE Loews Ventana Canyon Resort, 7000 N. Resort Drive. 615-5495.

CHICAGO BAR 5954 E. Speedway Blvd. 748-8169.

COLORS FOOD AND SPIRITS 5305 E. Speedway Blvd.

323-1840.

COLT’S TASTE OF TEXAS STEAKHOUSE 8310 N. Thornydale Road. 572-5968.

COMFORT SUITES 7007 E. Tanque Verde Road. 298-2300.

COPPER QUEEN HOTEL 11 Howell Ave. Bisbee. (520) 432-2216.

COW PALACE 28802 S. Nogales Highway. Amado. (520) 398-1999.

COW PONY BAR AND GRILL 6510 E. Tanque Verde Road.

721-2781.

CUSHING STREET RESTAURANT AND BAR 198 W. Cushing St. 622-7984.

DELECTABLES RESTAURANT AND CATERING 533 N. Fourth Ave. 884-9289.

THE DEPOT SPORTS BAR 3501 E. Fort Lowell Road. 795-8110.

DESERT DIAMOND CASINO MONSOON NIGHTCLUB 7350 S. Nogales Highway. 294-7777.

DIABLOS SPORTS BAR AND GRILL 2545 S. Craycroft Road.

514-9202.

46 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

DRIFTWOOD RESTAURANT AND LOUNGE 2001 S. Craycroft Road.

790-4317.

KINGFISHER BAR AND GRILL 2564 E. Grant Road. 323-7739.

GLASS ONION CAFE 1990 W. River Road, Suite 100. 293-6050.

HIDEOUT BAR AND GRILL 1110 S. Sherwood Village Drive.

751-2222.

THE HIDEOUT 3000 S. Mission Road. 791-0515.

HILDA’S SPORTS BAR 1120 Circulo Mercado. Rio Rico.

(520) 281-9440.

THE HOG PIT SMOKEHOUSE BAR AND GRILL 6910 E. Tanque Verde Road. 722-4302.

HOTEL TUCSON CITY CENTER 475 N. Granada Ave. 623-2000.

TANQUE VERDE RANCH 14301 E. Speedway Blvd. 296-6275.

THE OFFICE BAR 6333 S. Sixth Ave. 746-9803.

TANQUE VERDE SWAP MEET 4100 S. Palo Verde Road.

294-4252.

OLD FATHER INN 4080 W. Ina Road. Marana. 744-1200.

TERRY AND ZEKE’S 4603 E. Speedway Blvd. 325-3555.

OLD PUEBLO GRILLE 60 N. Alvernon Way. 326-6000.

UNICORN SPORTS LOUNGE 8060 E. 22nd St., No. 118.

722-6900.

OLD TUBAC INN RESTAURANT AND SALOON 7 Plaza Road.

Tubac. (520) 398-3161.

ON A ROLL 63 E. Congress St. 622-7655.

ORACLE INN 305 E. American Ave. Oracle. 896-3333.

O’SHAUGHNESSY’S 2200 N. Camino Principal. 296-7464.

OUTLAW SALOON 1302 W. Roger Road. 888-3910.

PAPPY’S DINER 1300 W. Prince Road. 408-5262.

THE HUT 305 N. Fourth Ave. 623-3200.

PARADISO BAR AND LOUNGE Casino Del Sol, 5655 W. Valencia Road. (800) 344-9435.

IBT’S 616 N. Fourth Ave. 882-3053.

THE PARISH 6453 N. Oracle Road. 797-1233.

IGUANA CAFE 210 E. Congress St. 882-5140.

LA PARRILLA SUIZA 2720 N. Oracle Road. 624-4300.

IRISH PUB 9155 E. Tanque Verde Road. 749-2299.

PEARSON’S PUB 1120 S. Wilmot Road. 747-2181.

JASPER NEIGHBORHOOD RESTAURANT AND BAR 6370 N. Campbell Ave., No. 160.

577-0326.

PINNACLE PEAK 6541 E. Tanque Verde Road. 296-0911.

JAVELINA CANTINA 445 S. Alvernon Way. 881-4200, ext.

5373.

PUTNEY’S 6090 N. Oracle Road.

575-1767.

JEFF’S PUB 112 S. Camino Seco Road. 886-1001.

SURLY WENCH PUB 424 N. Fourth Ave. 882-0009.

PLUSH 340 E. Sixth St. 798-1298.

RPM NIGHTCLUB 445 W. Wetmore Road. 869-6098.

UNION PUBLIC HOUSE 4340 N. Campbell Ave., No. 103.

329-8575.

V FINE THAI 9 E. Congress St. 882-8143.

VAUDEVILLE 110 E. Congress St. 622-3535.

WHISKEY TANGO 140 S. Kolb Road. 344-8843.

WILD BILL’S STEAKHOUSE AND SALOON 5910 N. Oracle Road.

887-6161.

WILDCAT HOUSE 1801 N. Stone Ave. 622-1302.

WINGS-PIZZA-N-THINGS 8838 E. Broadway Blvd. 722-9663.

WOODEN NICKEL 1908 S. Country Club Road. 323-8830.

WOODY’S 3710 N. Oracle Road.

292-6702.

WORLD FAMOUS GOLDEN NUGGET 2617 N. First Ave. 622-9202.

ZEN ROCK 121 E. Congress St. 624-9100.

THU MAY 17 LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Bob Linesch The Auld Dubliner Live local music Boondocks Lounge Ed DeLucia Café Passé Jeff Grubic and Naim Amor Casa Vicente Restaurante Español Live classical guitar Cascade Lounge Doug Martin Chicago Bar Neon Prophet La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar Stefan George, The Nameful, Man Jr. Colors Food and Spirits Melody Louise Eddies Cocktails Cass Preston and His Band La Fuente Mariachi Estrellas de la Fuente Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live mariachi music Hacienda del Sol Aaron Gilmartin Las Cazuelitas Live music McMahon’s Prime Steakhouse Susan Artemis Monterey Court Studio Galleries Carole Diamond O’Malley’s Live music On a Roll Live music O’Shaughnessy’s Live pianist and singer Paradiso Bar and Lounge Bella Donna (Stevie Nicks tribute) Pinnacle Peak Bluegrass Music Jam Plush Black Jackalope Ensemble RPM Nightclub 80’s and Gentlemen Sheraton Hotel and Suites Prime Example Sky Bar Logan Greene Electric, Page of Cups Sullivan’s Steak House Live music Union Public House George Howard and Larry Loud Vaudeville El Gulag, Clarice and the Lotion Baskets, Race to the Bottom Wild Bill’s Steakhouse and Saloon Wild Oats

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC The Bamboo Club Karaoke with DJ Tony G Bedroxx Karaoke with DJ Chubbz Bojangles Saloon The Branding Iron Ruthrauff Chubbrock Entertainment Buffalo Wild Wings Tucson’s Most Wanted Entertainment with KJ Sean The Depot Sports Bar Karaoke with DJ Brandon El Charro Café Sahuarita Famous Sam’s Silverbell Amazing Star karaoke Famous Sam’s Valencia Gilligan’s Pub Glass Onion Cafe Open mic Golden Pin Lanes Karaoke and music videos with DJ Adonis Hilda’s Sports Bar The Hog Pit Smokehouse Bar and Grill Steve Morningwood acoustic open-mic night Know Where 2 New Star Karaoke Margarita Bay Mr. Head’s Art Gallery and Bar Cutthroat Karaoke Music Box Karaoke with AJ Outlaw Saloon Chubbrock Entertainment River’s Edge Lounge Karaoke with KJ David Royal Sun Inn and Suites Y Not Karaoke Stadium Grill Chubbrock Entertainment Whiskey Tango

DANCE/DJ Azul Restaurant Lounge DJ spins music Diablos Sports Bar and Grill Bikini bash with DJ Han Solo Eclipse at College Place DJ spins music Gentle Ben’s Brewing Company DJ spins music The Hideout Fiesta DJs IBT’s DJ spins music Javelina Cantina DJ M. Level Bar Lounge DJ Apprentice Sam Hughes Place Championship Dining DJ spins music Sapphire Lounge Salsa night Sharks DJ Aspen Surly Wench Pub Jump Jive Thursday with DJ Ribz Unicorn Sports Lounge Y Not Entertainment V Fine Thai Foundation Thursdays: DJs spin music, art show, wine tasting Zen Rock DJ Kidd Kutz If you would like your band, club or solo act to be listed, send all pertinent times, dates, prices and places to: Club Listings, Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726. Fax listings to 792-2096. Or e-mail us at clubs@tucsonweekly.com.

Deadline to receive listings information is noon on Friday, seven days before the Thursday publication date. For display advertising information, call 294-1200.

COMEDY Laffs Comedy CaffĂŠ Open mic

TRIVIA/PUB QUIZ Salty Dawg II Team trivia

FRI MAY 18 LIVE MUSIC Amado Territory Steakhouse Becky Reyes featuring Scott Muhleman Arizona Inn Dennis Reed The Bamboo Club Live music The Bashful Bandit Live music Bluefin Seafood Bistro George Howard Duo Bojangles Saloon Live music Boondocks Lounge Neon Prophet Borderlands Brewing Company Alisha Peru Cactus Moon Chad Freeman, Redline The Canyonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Crown Restaurant and Pub Live music Cascade Lounge Doug Martin Chicago Bar The AmoSphere Club Congress Imagine Dragons, Downtown Brown, Mr Free and the Satellite Freakout, Flagrante Delicto La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar Greg Morton, Benefit for LPFM Community Radio: Holy Rolling Empire, Blind Divine, The Wolfgang Colors Food and Spirits Melody Louise Delectables Restaurant and Catering Stefan George Dry River Company Wendigo Crossing Eclipse at College Place Live music Eddies Cocktails Dust Devils El MezĂłn del Cobre Mariachi Azteca El Parador Descarga, Salsarengue, Tito y Su Nuevo Son Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s E. Golf Links Live music La Fuente Mariachi Estrellas de la Fuente Glass Onion Cafe Live music The Grill at Quail Creek Paul McGuffin Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Hacienda del Sol Freddy Vesely Hacienda del Sol Heart and Soul The Hideout Sol Down Hotel Tucson City Center Bishop/Nelly Duo The Hut Fortunate Youth, The Simpkin Project, Frankie Lopez Irish Pub Johnnie and the Rumblers Jasper Neighborhood Restaurant and Bar Blue Rays Las Cazuelitas Mariachis Liâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;l Abnerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Steakhouse Arizona Dance Hands Luna Bella Italian Cuisine and Catering Edna and Ely Maverick Flipside McMahonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Prime Steakhouse Patio: Retro Rockets, Daniel â&#x20AC;&#x153;Slyâ&#x20AC;? Slipetsky Mint Cocktails Live music Monterey Court Studio Galleries Jumper Mr. Anâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Teppan Steak and Sushi Los Cubanos Mr. Headâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Art Gallery and Bar Collin Shook Trio Old Father Inn Live music Oracle Inn Greg Spivey Band Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Shaughnessyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Live pianist and singer Paradiso Bar and Lounge Rhythm Edition The Parish Live music

La Parrilla Suiza Mariachi music Plush The Cordials, The Shondes, Amy Rude Redline Sports Grill Giant Blue Rialto Theatre Spiritualized Ricâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cafe/Restaurant Live music Riverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Edge Lounge Wild Ride The Rock Lunar Housing, Benjamin Hyatt Band, Heart Attack Shack, Forever Of, The Endless Pursuit, Higher Grounds, Setback Shot in the Dark CafĂŠ Mark Bockel Sky Bar Elemental Artistry Fire-Dancing The Skybox Restaurant and Sports Bar 80â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s and Gentlemen Solar Culture Parcematone, Swansea Stadium Grill Live music Sullivanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Steak House Live music Tanque Verde Swap Meet Live music Whiskey Tango Live music Wild Billâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Steakhouse and Saloon Beau Renfro and Clear Country Woodyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Susan Artemis

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC Best Western Royal Sun Inn and Suites Karaoke with DJ Richard The Branding Iron Ruthrauff Chubbrock Entertainment Brats Brodieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Tavern Cow Palace Karaoke with DJ Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s W. Ruthrauff Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pima Iguana Cafe Jeffâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pub Kustom Karaoke Know Where 2 New Star Karaoke Liquor Barrel Saloon Karaoke with Tyme 2 Sing Margarita Bay Midtown Bar and Grill Putneyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Karaoke with DJ Soup R Place Bar and Grill Karaoke with RichieRich Rileyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Irish Tavern Chubbrock Entertainment Royal Sun Inn and Suites Y Not Karaoke Salty Dawg II Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Most Wanted Entertainment with KJ Sean Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon Stockmenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Lounge Terry and Zekeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Wings-Pizza-N-Things YNot Entertainment

DANCE/DJ The Auld Dubliner DJ spins music Azul Restaurant Lounge Ladies and Lyrics Night: DJ spins music Bedroxx DJ spins music Casa Vicente Restaurante EspaĂąol Flamenco guitar and dance show Circle S Saloon DJ BarryB The Depot Sports Bar DJ and music videos Desert Diamond Casino Monsoon Nightclub Friday Night Groove DV8 Planet Q Live with Chris P. and JoJo El Charro CafĂŠ Sahuarita DJ spins music El Charro CafĂŠ on Broadway DJ spins R&B El Parador Salsa dance lessons with Jeannie Tucker Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Valencia DJ spins music Fuku Sushi DJ spins music IBTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s CelloFame

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE

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FRI MAY 18

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 47

Driftwood Restaurant and Lounge Live music Dry River Company Shaky Bones Eclipse at College Place Live music Eddies Cocktails Classic rock ’n’ roll El Charro Café Sahuarita Live salsa band El Mezón del Cobre Mariachi Azteca El Parador Descarga, Salsarengue, Tito y Su Nuevo Son Enoteca Pizzeria Wine Bar Phil Borzillo Famous Sam’s E. Golf Links Live music Flying V Bar and Grill Domingo DeGrazia La Fuente Mariachi Estrellas de la Fuente Gold Live music Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Hacienda del Sol Freddy Vesely The Hideout Los Bandidos The Hut Fiction 20 Down Jasper Neighborhood Restaurant and Bar Glen Gross Quartet Kingfisher Bar and Grill Stefan George Las Cazuelitas Mariachis Li’l Abner’s Steakhouse Arizona Dance Hands Lookout Bar and Grille at Westward Look Resort Live acoustic Luna Bella Italian Cuisine and Catering Eleanor Winston Maverick The Jack Bishop Band McMahon’s Prime Steakhouse Daniel “Sly” Slipetsky Monterey Court Studio Galleries Kelly Pardi Mr. An’s Teppan Steak and Sushi The Bishop/Nelly Duo Mr. Head’s Art Gallery and Bar Collin Shook Trio New Moon Tucson Too Much Information O’Malley’s Live music The Office Bar Reggae Night: 12 Tribes Sound, Jahmar International Old Pueblo Grille Live music Old Tubac Inn Restaurant and Saloon Beau Renfro and Clear Country Band Oracle Inn Wild Ride Band O’Shaughnessy’s Live pianist and singer Paradiso Bar and Lounge Relente La Parrilla Suiza Mariachi music Plush The Vases, You Won’t, Alcoholic Faith Mission Ric’s Cafe/Restaurant Live music River’s Edge Lounge Shell Shock The Rock Delta 9, Deadnoise, Plastic Disease, Tranceducer, Ignescent, Ghast, Detale, Cherie Nova, AZHCJ Hardstyle team Sakura The Equinox Band Sheraton Hotel and Suites Tucson Jazz Institute Sky Bar Dream Sick, St. Ranger Stadium Grill Live music

Javelina Cantina DJ M. Level Bar Lounge DJ Jason E. Maynards Market and Kitchen DJ spins music Music Box ’80s and more NoRTH DJ Phatal O’Malley’s DJ Dibs Sam Hughes Place Championship Dining DJ spins music Sapphire Lounge Flashback Fridays with DJ Sid the Kid Sinbad’s Fine Mediterranean Cuisine DJ spins music Sky Bar Hot Era party Surly Wench Pub Club Sanctuary Unicorn Sports Lounge Y Not Entertainment Vaudeville Grapla, Lee Hybrid Wildcat House Top 40 dance mix Wooden Nickel DJ spins music Zen Rock DJ Kidd Kutz

COMEDY Laffs Comedy Caffé Tom Clark Rock n’ Java Not Burnt Out Just Unscrewed

SAT MAY 19 LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Dennis Reed The Bashful Bandit Live music Bojangles Saloon Live music Boondocks Lounge Heather Hardy and the Li’l Mama Band Café Passé Elephant Head Trio Cascade Lounge George Howard Chicago Bar Neon Prophet Club Congress ChamberLab La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar Mitzi Cowell CD-release Colt’s Taste of Texas Steakhouse Live music Cow Pony Bar and Grill DJ spins music Cushing Street Restaurant and Bar Live jazz Delectables Restaurant and Catering Live music Desert Diamond Casino Monsoon Nightclub Noches Caliente Don’s Bayou Cajun Cookin’ Melody Louise

$3.50 JUMBO CUERVO MARGARITAS ALL DAY, EVERY DAY

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A Spor ts! s ✦ MLB Ti A CA N ✦ ng E HD Projector TV xi G UFC ✦ Bo s or Our 2 HU TV ef -D Hi 27 r AME on ou Watch YOUR G Room for Your Special Event x ✦ Boxing Machine ✦ VIP Pool Tables ✦ Internet Jukebo

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DANCE/DJ The Auld Dubliner DJ spins music Bedroxx DJ spins music Brodie’s Tavern Latino Night Cactus Moon Line-dance lesson Casa Vicente Restaurante Español Flamenco guitar and dance show Club Centro (at V Fine Thai Dining) DJ MGM, DJ Dibbs Club Congress Bang! Bang! dance party La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar DJ Herm El Charro Café on Broadway DJ Soo Latin mix El Parador Salsa dance lessons with Jeannie Tucker Famous Sam’s Valencia DJ spins music Gentle Ben’s Brewing Company DJ spins music IBT’s DJ spins music Level Bar Lounge DJ Phatal Music Box ’80s and more On a Roll DJ Aspen Rusty’s Family Restaurant and Sports Grille DJ Obi Wan Kenobi Sam Hughes Place Championship Dining DJ spins music Sapphire Lounge DJ 64, DJ Phil Sharks DJ Chucky Chingon Sinbad’s Fine Mediterranean Cuisine Belly dancing with Emma Jeffries and friends Solar Culture Milonga hosted by Kate Rosalik, DJ Joanne Canelli Wildcat House Tejano dance mix Wooden Nickel DJ spins music Zen Rock DJ Kidd Kutz

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC The Bashful Bandit Y-Not Karaoke Club Congress Club Karaoke Cow Pony Bar and Grill Diablos Sports Bar and Grill Elbow Room Open mic Famous Sam’s W. Ruthrauff Family karaoke The Hideout IBT’s Amazing Star Entertainment Liquor Barrel Saloon Acoustic open-mic Margarita Bay Mint Cocktails Pappy’s Diner Putney’s Karaoke with DJ Soup River’s Edge Lounge Karaoke with KJ David RJ’s Replays Sports Pub and Grub YNot Productions Karaoke Salty Dawg II Tucson’s Most Wanted Entertainment with KJ Sean Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon The Skybox Restaurant and Sports Bar Karaoke and dance music with DJ Tigger Stockmen’s Lounge Whiskey Tango Wooden Nickel Woody’s World Famous Golden Nugget

DANCE/DJ Comfort Suites Singing, drumming DJ Bob Kay plays oldies The Hut DJ Dibs, DJ Johnny IBT’s DJ spins music Kon Tiki DJ Century Level Bar Lounge DJ Phatal Loews Ventana Canyon Resort Crash the Pool party: DJ Corbin Dooley, DJ Phoseph Ra Sushi Bar Restaurant DJs spin music Shot in the Dark Café DJ Artice Power Ballad Sundays

TRIVIA/PUB QUIZ The Auld Dubliner Pub quiz Fox and Hound Smokehouse and Tavern Team Trivia with DJ Joker

Laffs Comedy Caffé Tom Clark Pappy’s Diner Open mic

MON MAY 21

SUN MAY 20

LIVE MUSIC

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Arizona Inn Dennis Reed Armitage Wine Lounge and Café Ryanhood The Auld Dubliner Irish jam session The Bashful Bandit Sunday Jam with the Deacon Beau Brummel Club R&B jam session Boondocks Lounge Last Call Girls Chicago Bar Reggae Sundays Club Congress Great Lake Swimmers, Cold Specks

Arizona Inn Dennis Reed Boondocks Lounge Bryan Dean Trio Chicago Bar The Ronstadts Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Hacienda del Sol Aaron Gilmartin Las Cazuelitas Live music

CONTINUED ON PAGE 50

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Driftwood Restaurant and Lounge Live music Eddies Cocktails Dust Devils La Fuente Mariachi Estrellas de la Fuente The Grill at Quail Creek Paul McGuffin Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Las Cazuelitas Live music Li’l Abner’s Steakhouse Titan Valley Warheads Lotus Garden Restaurant Melody Louise McMahon’s Prime Steakhouse David Prouty Monterey Court Studio Galleries Luis Sabor Nimbus Brewing Company Taproom Larry Armstrong and CopperMoon Old Pueblo Grille Live music O’Shaughnessy’s Live pianist and singer Plush Folk ’Em Up Raging Sage Coffee Roasters Paul Oman Sakura The Equinox Band Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon Heather Hardy, TJ Swan Sullivan’s Steak House George Howard and Larry Loud

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NINE QUESTIONS Lisa Healey Lisa Healey is a Boston native who moved to Tucson seven years ago. A desk jockey by day, at night, she can be found at live music venues around town taking photos of bands and musicians.

Mel Mason, mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

What was the first concert you ever saw?

Rush at the Providence Civic Center in 1981.

I was there to see the opener, a local Boston band named the Fools who I adored, and didn’t know much about Rush. After that, I became a big Rush fan.

What are you listening to these days?

Alabama Shakes, First Aid Kit, Of Monsters and Men (playing at Rialto soon!), and Julia Nunes.

I’ve got musical ADD, so it’s constantly changing.

What was the first album you owned?

I saved up and bought the Carpenters’ Close to You. That was the start of my love affair with covers. I would repeatedly play the version of “Help!” on that album, then the Beatles’ version on my portable record player. As a 7-year-old, I was fascinated that a girl and a boy could sing the same song.

What artist, genre or musical trend does everyone seem to love but you just don’t get?

I can appreciate the musicianship and the showmanship, but I just don’t get Gogol Bordello and the whole gypsy-music thing.

What musical act, current or defunct, would you most like to see perform live?

I would like to see the Clash at Plush on a night when there are less than 100 people in attendance, and all are dancing.

Musically speaking, what is your favorite guilty pleasure?

Seventies soft rock—Bread, John Denver, Carly Simon, Seals and Crofts, etc.

Thurs/Sat: Fri 5/18: Sun 5/20: Mon 5/21: Tues 5/22: Wed 5/23:

What song would you like to have played at your funeral?

The version of “What a Wonderful World” by Nick Cave with Shane MacGowan.

What band or artist changed your life, and how?

The Cure. I had never been able to sustain a liking to any one band for more than one album until I heard them in my late teens/early 20s.

Figurative gun to your head, what is your favorite album of all time?

The Clash, London Calling. The music and the cover photo make it a true classic.

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Phoenix singer-songwriter Lonna Kelley is a longtime favorite at Club Congressâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;but sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s taking a different road with her new band.

Make My Baby is more of a collaborative effortâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;with three female singers, right out frontâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;than Kelleyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s alt-country bands Broken Hearted Lovers and Reluctant Messiahs. And Make My Baby captures an entirely different sound, a tom-thumping, fuzzed-out garagerock thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lightened by tight harmonies.

The relatively new band played Club Congress in December, but on Friday, it headlined an almost-exclusively female night, with Acorn Bcorn, AK Kitten and Ruth Wilson also scheduled. Unfortunately, my evening hit a snag, and I missed the first half of the show.

Make My Baby features Kelley on guitar and vocals; Tabby Hufman and Ann Seletos on standing, bass-free drum kits and vocals; and, almost hiding in the back, the guys rounding out the band. They opened with â&#x20AC;&#x153;On the Radio,â&#x20AC;? a spiritual cousin to the new Beach Boys single, featuring nostalgia laid bare, and celebrating music, youth, dancing and the sense that â&#x20AC;&#x153;everything is possible, on the radio.â&#x20AC;?

Make My Baby might be Arizonaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s answer to retro girl groups like Best Coast, Vivian Girls and Dum Dum Girls, but beyond the bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sweet harmonies, everything is raw, loud and even a bit twisted. Make My Baby stays away from dreamy reverb, remaining firmly planted in a lo-fi buzz that contrasts beautifully with the bubblegum-pop vocals.

The songs continued in the vein of â&#x20AC;&#x153;On the Radioâ&#x20AC;?â&#x20AC;&#x201D;teenage tales of being love-struck, motoring around and other familiar exploits.

Just a few months old, Make My Baby is forgiven for turning in a relatively short set. Their charms are plenty, and as the band writes more songs, we should keep our eyes peeled for more Tucson performances.

Ahead of Make My Baby was the strippeddown blues-punk of sister-duo Acorn Bcorn.

Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s plenty of menace delivered by the kick drums and the squealing guitar, and when Marina Cornelius unleashes the chorus of â&#x20AC;&#x153;Whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf?â&#x20AC;? itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s downright frightening. Elsewhere, Marina and Leanne took the tempo to fast and frenzied, leaving an electrifying buzz hanging in the air as they brought the last song to a crash landing.

Eric Swedlund mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

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TAMM

ES ES

Tucson Area Music

Awards a ds

HEY, LOCAL-MUSIC FANS! We need your help to determine Tucson music’s best bands and releases over the last year.

The Tucson Area Music Awards (TAMMIES) honors those musicians, professional and amateur alike, who make our local music scene great. It’s a tough job at times, and we want to give credit where credit is due.

Please fill out as many categories on the ballot as possible (if you have an informed opinion, that is)—but fill out only one ballot per person, please. The top vote-getters in each category will join the top critics’-choice votegetters in the final round of TAMMIES voting, which will take place this summer.

THE BIG STUFF: Band/Musician of the Year (2010 winners Sergio Mendoza y la Orkesta and 2011 winners Calexico are ineligible) Up-and-Coming Artist(s) of the Year Best New Release (Since May 2011)

PERFORMANCE AWARDS Blues Bluegrass Country/Western Cover Band DJ Electronic Folk Funk/Soul Hip-Hop Jazz

Latin Jazz/Salsa Mariachi Metal Punk Reggae/Ska Rock Roots Rock/ Rockabilly Tejano World

MUSICIANS AWARDS (Include Band Name(s))

Female Vocalist Male Vocalist Songwriter Guitarist Bassist Drummer Keyboardist Horn player String Player (excluding guitar) Multi-Instrumentalist

Important Rules: • • • •

•

GO TO

Balloting ends on Wednesday, May 30.

No paper ballots will be accepted; vote online at TucsonWeekly.com.

One ballot per person. You cannot vote on behalf of another person; each person must fill out their ballot themselves.

Only ballots with a first AND last name and either an e-mail address or phone number will be accepted. If you don’t put a first AND last name and a legit phone number and/or e-mail address, we will delete your ballot.

Ballot-box stuffing is a no-no. Bands/musicians can do simple campaigning—i.e. encourage fans to vote for you at gigs, or link from your website to ours—but anything beyond that is forbidden.

Anyone suspected of stuffing may be disqualified at the discretion of the editor. If you have questions or tips about ballot-box stuffing, call 295-4221, or e-mail mailbag@tucsonweekly.com.

TucsonWeekly.com TO VOTE. MAY 17 – 23, 2012

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WED MAY 23

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RHYTHM & VIEWS Great Lake Swimmers

Godhunter

GSol

New Wild Everywhere

Wolves

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Toronto songwriter Tony Dekker leads Great Lake Swimmers, an electrified folk orchestra striving for the same agelessness that’s carried decades of roots music.

New Wild Everywhere finds Dekker writing with a troubadour’s restlessness, filling his songs with elemental and natural imagery—fire, wind, storms, animals, wounds, dreams and desires.

The band’s sound falls somewhere in the area of Roger McGuinn fronting the Band, or Will Oldham forcing Arcade Fire into going country. It’s rich and polished chamber folk, well-executed on slower songs like the dreamy violin-led opener “Think That You Might Be Wrong,” though the spark really comes when the band picks up the pace.

The album’s mostmemorable songs share an up-tempo jumpiness: the breezy Laurel Canyon-esque “New Wild Everywhere,” the full-bore country rocker “Changes With the Wind” and the brightly melodic “Easy Come Easy Go.” But it’s the ballad “Fields of Progeny” that serves as the album’s calling card, an ode to old-time roots music and all the links that have brought that music to the present. Dekker’s sincere longing is fully exposed as he sings, “I hear the old voices singing / this song will never end / it was here long ago and continues to grow / in the fields of progeny.”

Great Lake Swimmers play music for the Instagram world, turning to sepia tone in fond mimicry of the old originals— and pulling it off beautifully.

Eric Swedlund

Local sludge quintet Godhunter finally unveils a proper physical-CD release for their debut five-track album, which became available via the band’s Bandcamp site earlier this year. Recorded at Arcane Digital Recording in Chandler and released by Tucson extreme-music label Acid Reflux, Wolves wields a medulla oblongata-wrenching wallop and obvious political (anarcho-libertarian) lyrics.

In opening cut “(Stop Being) Sheep,” lead screamer Charlie Touseull offers clear-cut directions to the Starbucks-windows-wrecking crowd: “Don’t just bitch / Smash, burn, fight / Recipe: / Bottle, gas, rag, ignite.” It’s an oddly kinetic memo to generate against a backdrop of lumbering-dinosaurs-trapped-inmolasses doom-metal riffs.

But Godhunter delivers it with enough conviction and authority that I don’t wish to argue with anything these guys say, even if I don’t agree with much of it.

The band gets a nifty boost from local singer Sean Raines (We Killed the Union), who provides additional melodic vocals on two tracks, including the harrowing, heavierthan-a-wooly-mammoth’shairy-balls “Red State/Black Crusade.” Godhunter has already opened for a shit-ton of top stoner-doom-crust bands coming through town—The Sword, Black Tusk, Crowbar. Although they’re playing a style of music arguably better suited for the South than the Southwest, Godhunter deserves some serious street cred for creating perhaps the best sludge album to ever ooze out of Tucson.

Jarret Keene

Great Lake Swimmers perform with Cold Specks at 7 p.m., Sunday, May 20, at Club Congress, 311 E. Congress St. $12; 622-8848.

Godhunter plays the Surly Wench Pub, 424 N. Fourth Ave., at 10 p.m., Saturday, May 19, with Anakim and Inoculara. $5; 882-0009.

If you’re looking for something mainstream in terms of songs with melody lines, lyrics and a semblance of structure, this is not the record for you.

Throw in a Joseph Campbell reference to help flesh out the title, and you begin to get the sense this is not something you’re going to hear on the radio … unless you’ve managed to find an obscure free-form station to keep you company on an allnight drive. Within that context, this album—which mixes Latin jazz riffs, scat vocals with a Beat poet’s sensibility, and percussion that’s both driving and nuanced—is perfect.

While each of the 12 compositions, recorded live in a coffeehouse in South Tucson, begins with a specific rhythm, it’s not long before they quickly evolve into their own self-contained improvisations. While GSol is not what you would call a jam band, it does embody that spirit, with its members playing off each other.

Giving the band its vocal identity is Alessandro Circiello. His rhythm guitar leads the group into every piece, but it’s his voice, used much like a lead instrument, that brings color to these rhythms and the tasty acoustic guitar leads of Anton Shekerjiev. Neil Diamente locks everything down on bass. But it’s the band’s ringer, Miguel Bazemore, a veteran of many Los Angeles studio sessions dating back to the 1970s, who steals the show with a mix of congas, bongos and djembe.

Jim Lipson GSol perform at 7:30 p.m., next Thursday, May 24, at Cushing Street Bar and Restaurant, 198 W. Cushing St. Free; 622-7984.

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MEDICAL MJ A May 25 hearing will help decide whether PTSD and other afflictions are added to the state’s MMJ qualifying-conditions list

Speak Up!

BY J.M. SMITH, jsmith@tucsonweekly.com couple of weeks ago, I saw two people fucking like wild animals on a bench at Himmel Park in the middle of the night.

It was one of those That Just Happened moments that passed quickly through my hippocampus and was permanently burned into long-term memory. The incident is apropos of nothing, except maybe that some people have all the luck, and where there’s a will, there’s a way.

The same could be said for Arizona doctors trying to get illnesses added to the list of qualifying conditions for medical marijuana.

Back in January, the state took applications for the addition of qualifying illnesses. Four have made the first cut—post-traumatic stress disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, migraines and depression—which basically means the state found that the petitioners offered evidence that the illnesses impair, and that cannabis provides relief.

There is a lot of evidence out there that MMJ helps all of these conditions, each of which appears on existing or pending MMJ legislation in other states. The nation’s newest approved MMJ bill, which the governor of Connecticut has said he will sign, includes PTSD, and the Food and Drug Administration approved a clinical trial last year for a doctor to further test cannabis for treating PTSD. (The Drug Enforcement Administration shot down that request by not allowing the doctor access to legal MMJ.) Now that the state has evidence on the proposed new qualifying conditions, some of which can be found on the state Department of Health Services website (azdhs.gov/ medicalmarijuana/debilitating/index.htm), there will be a public hearing to take comment.

The hearing is set for Friday, May 25, in

A

Phoenix, and Mr. Smith plans to be there. I urge you to go, too, especially if you have one of these conditions. We need patients to show up en masse to school the DHS in the real-world benefits of MMJ. Pack the room. Tell the state what’s what.

The hearing will be held at the State Laboratory Services office, 250 N. 17th Ave. From 1 to 2:30 p.m., the focus is on PTSD. From 2:30 to 4 p.m., the topics are depression, migraines and generalized anxiety disorder.

In Other News Another important decision came down this month concerning MMJ in the great state of Arizona.

A May 8 ruling from Maricopa County Superior Court Judge J. Richard Gama basically tosses an attempt to allow dispensaries to open without medical directors. The ruling stems from a case filed last year challenging the rules for dispensary operators. The plaintiffs more or less won that case earlier this year, forcing the state to let up on the choke chain around the necks of dispensary operators. After that challenge was decided, and the rules were loosened, the plaintiffs, including the Phoenix dispensary hopeful Compassion First LLC, tried to file an amendment challenging yet another rule—that each dispensary have a medical director.

Too late, Compassion First. You should have thought of that in the first place.

“The time to add a car to this train was before it left the station, not as it was arriving at its destination,” Gama said in his latest ruling.

He went on to say the defendants would be prejudiced by the late attack, and the public would be harmed by further delays in implementing the Arizona Medical Marijuana Act. Why would you not want a medical director

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at a dispensary? Yes, it will cost dispensaries money to hire them. Yes, it might be tough to find enough doctors willing to staff every dispensary. But it seems to me like another way

to keep federal agents from smashing locks off of your dispensary doors and carting off computers, records, meds and, maybe, people.

Mr. Smith approves.

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¡ASK A MEXICAN!

BY GUSTAVO ARELLANO, themexican@askamexican.net I usually don’t allow anyone to hijack this columna, but an exception must be made for California State Assemblymember Gil Cedillo.

He’s been fighting the good fight for decades, including recently trying to get driver’s licenses for illegal immigrants and ceaselessly supporting DREAMers. Cedillo was so moved by the undocumented college student who wrote in a couple of weeks ago fretting about his future and inability to pay for community college that the chingón assemblymember wrote in with this public-service announcement: Unfortunately, Congress has stalled on passing the Federal DREAM Act. However, here in California, just last year, Gov. Jerry Brown signed AB 130 and AB 131, which allow all students to receive financial aid regardless of immigration status.

Assembly Bill 130 went into effect on Jan. 1, 2012, and allows students to receive private scholarships.

Currently, there are many organizations, donors and colleges raising money for undocumented students. Just a few weeks ago, the University of California at Berkeley announced that they awarded approximately $1 million in scholarships, which was funded by a combination of private gifts and endowments, to 140 students. In Silicon Valley, a group of technology leaders have donated money for scholarships and resources to undocumented students through an organization called Educators for Fair Consideration. Furthermore, next year, once AB 131 is implemented, students will have the opportunity to receive Cal Grants, Board of Governor’s Fee Waivers (for community college students) and other state-funded scholarships. Although I agree with Gustavo that we must keep the faith while the Congress acts on the federal DREAM Act, here in California, we at least have something to be proud of and look forward to.

Garcia! Is this a plot to confuse whitey?

It’s working, if it is!

No More Nombres Dear Gabacho: From the moment a Mexican is born until the day he’s seis pies abajo, a Mexican’s sole goal in life is to confound gabachos—commanded so by diosito en el cielo in Leviticus, it is.

But the long-winded names Mexicans use are not part of that conspiracy.

You can actually find a version of this question in my ¡Ask a Mexican! book (BUY BUY BUY in the next week, and you get a free ¡Ask a Mexican! tote bag … or not), but let me reiterate: Traditionally, a Mexican’s full name constituted four parts: a first name, a middle nombre, a surname, and the mother’s apellido. (More than a few Mexis drop the middle name, and use those initials to create cool belt buckles.) This insistence on honoring the maternal and paternal sides of the familia, however, wrecks desmadre on American legal forms, which frequently mistake the maternal name for the last name, a middle name for a surname, or a surname for a middle name. And now you know why far too many Mexis get pulled aside by the Transportation Security Administration—oh, and that whole Tío Lencho-looks-like-Saddam Hussein thing, too …

LAST CALL TO BUY ‘TACO USA’!

Gentle cabrones, my Taco USA: How Mexican Food Conquered America has finally hit bookstores! Place your order with your favorite local bookstore, your finer online retailers, or your craftier piratas, but place it: My libro editor has already promised to deport me from the Gracias, Assemblymember Cedillo. If only more publishing industry if we don’t sell enough copassemblymembers and state senators across the ies! After this week, I promise to stop running country agreed with you on this issue. this shameless self-promotion so I can sneak in Readers: Now, back to your regular more questions—so BUY BUY BUY! Gosh, I programming. sound like a pinche public-radio station during a fund drive …

Dear Mexican: Why do Mexicans change their names, seemingly at whim? For example, Ask the Mexican at themexican@askamexican.

Antonio Garcia Rodriguez is Antonio Garcia on net; be his fan on Facebook; follow him on Twitter Monday, and Antonio Rodriguez on Wednesday. @gustavoarellano; or ask him a video question at And by Saturday, he might call himself Pedro youtube.com/askamexicano!

56 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

By Rob Brezsny. Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY HOROSCOPE 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700 $1.99 per minute. 18 and over. Touchtone phone required.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Is there a difference in sound quality between relatively inexpensive modern violins and the multi-million-dollar violins created by master craftsmen in the 1700s? In research done at the Eighth International Violin Competition, most violinists couldn’t tell them apart. (Read more at tinyurl. com/ViolinResearch.) In accordance with the astrological omens, Aries, I urge you to do comparable tests in your own sphere.

There’s no need to overpay for anything, either with your money, your emotions, your energy or your time. Go with what works, not with what costs the most or has the highest status.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): If we thought of your life as a book, the title of the next chapter could very well be “In Quest of the Primal.” I encourage you to meditate on what that means to you, and then act accordingly. Here are a few possibilities: tapping into the mother lode; connecting to the source; communing with the core; returning to beginnings; seeking out the original; being in tune with the pulse of nature. Does any of that sound like fun?

According to my reading of the astrological omens, you have a mandate to be as raw as the law allows—to be the smartest animal you can be.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): A Russian woman named Marija Usova decided to go skydiving even though she was eight months pregnant. “I wanted my baby to have the beautiful feeling of flying through the air and free-falling before it was born,” she said. Soon after she jumped out of the plane and opened her parachute, she went into labor. Luckily, her daughter waited until she landed to be born. What does this have to do with you? I don’t recommend you do anything even remotely like what Usova did in the next few weeks. But do be alert for healthier, saner approaches to the basic theme, which is to be adventurous, wild and free as you birth a new possibility.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): You spend nearly one-third of your life sleeping. For one-fifth of that time, you’re dreaming. So pretty much every night, you watch and respond to as much as 90 minutes’ worth of movies created by and starring you.

Much of this footage is obscure and confusing and not exactly Oscar-worthy, which is one reason you may not recall many

of the details when you wake up. But according to my astrological analysis, the immediate future could be different. Your dreams should be full of riveting entertainment that reveals important information about the mysteries of your destiny. Please consider keeping a pen and notebook near your bed, or a small recording device.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): It’s Oxymoron Season for you. That means you’re likely to encounter more than your usual share of sweet and sour paradoxes. The logicloving areas of your brain will almost certainly have to seek assistance from your nonrational side. I’ll give you a heads-up on some of the lucid riddles you should be ready to embrace: 1. a humbling triumph; 2. a tender rivalry; 3. a selfish blessing; 4. an opportunity to commune with risky comfort; 5. an invitation to explore a relaxing challenge; 6. a chance to get up close and personal with a long-distance connection. For best results, Leo, memorize these lines from Walt Whitman’s Leaves of Grass, and recite them periodically: “Do I contradict myself? / Very well then I contradict myself. / (I am large, I contain multitudes.)”

force of a thousand love songs. My advice?

Have fun, and stay amused.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “The chains that bind us most closely are the ones we have broken,” said Scorpio poet Antonio Porchia. In other words, the oppression from which we have freed ourselves may continue to influence us long after we’ve escaped. The imprint it left on our sensitive psyches might keep distorting our decisions and twisting our emotions.

But I’m here to tell you, Scorpio, that you’re entering a time when you have an enhanced power to dissolve the lingering taint your broken chains still impose. You finally have the resources and wisdom to complete the liberation process.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): In the coming weeks, you will have an excellent chance to develop more skill in the art of high gossip. High gossip has almost nothing in common with the mindless prattle that erodes reputations and fosters cynicism. It’s not driven by envy, pettiness or schadenfreude. When you engage in high gossip, you spread uplifting whispers and inspirational hearsay; you speculate about

people’s talents and call attention to their successes; you conspire to awaken generosity of spirit and practical idealism. High gossip is a righteous approach to chatting about the human zoo. It might not flow as easily as the cheap and shabby kind— at least at first—but it lasts a whole lot longer and creates connections that help keep your mental hygiene sparkling clean.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): I sometimes have a dream that seems cryptic or meaningless when I first wake up, but a few days later, I realize it was a brilliant insight into what I most needed to transform about my life. If you don’t recall many of your dreams, that might not be a familiar experience for you. But you’ve probably had waking-life experiences with a similar arc. I predict you will be given at least one of those in the coming week. It may confound you while you’re in the midst of it, but will eventually reveal choice clues that have the power to change your life for the better.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): You may not have heard about the “forbidden colors.” And you certainly haven’t seen them,

even though they exist. They’re reddish green and yellowish blue, which the cells of your retina are not built to register.

However, scientists have figured out a trick by which these hues can be made visible.

A few lucky people have actually caught a glimpse of them. I bring this to your attention, Aquarius, because I suspect you are close to experiencing a metaphorical version of this breakthrough—seeing something that is supposedly impossible to see. (If you’d like to read more about the forbidden colors, go to tinyurl.com/ ForbiddenColors.)

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “There’s no such thing as a wrong note,” said jazz pianist Art Tatum. “It all depends on how you resolve it.” Jazz trumpeter Miles Davis had a similar philosophy. “It’s not the note you play that’s the wrong note,” he said. “It’s the note you play afterward that makes it right or wrong.” I think that’s an excellent understanding for you to keep in mind during the coming weeks, Pisces. Be wary of coming to premature conclusions about alleged mistakes. Wait to hear the entire song, and see the bigger picture.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): There’s at least a 50 percent chance that the coming days will be over the top, out of the blue and off the record. I’m half-expecting florid, luscious and kaleidoscopic events, possibly even rococo, swashbuckling and splendiferous adventures. Are you ready for all this? Of course not. That’s the point life will be trying to make: nudging you to learn more about the fine art of spontaneity as you improvise your way through unpredictable lessons that will lead you toward the resources you’ll need to succeed.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Obsessions.

Enchantments. Crushes. Manias. Fetishes.

Some astrologers think you Libras are mostly immune from these indelicate but sometimes delightful modes of human expression. They seem to believe that you love harmony and balance too much to fall under the spell of a bewitching passion that rivets your focus. I disagree with that view. It may be true that you’re better able than the other signs to be objective about your fixations. But that doesn’t necessarily dilute the intensity you feel when they rise up and captivate your imagination with the

MAY 17 – 23, 2012

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BY DAN SAVAGE, mail@savagelove.net

I work in an office tower in downtown Seattle.

From time to time, I go to a bathroom on a mostly deserted floor, go into a stall, and rub out a quick one. Usually, no one comes in.

Today, just as I was blowing a load into a handful of TP, someone came into the bathroom.

This person walked up to the stall and stared through the door crack. This person stood there for a second before walking over to the urinal.

He finished and left. I flushed, washed my hands and left. A security guard came around the corner while I was waiting for the elevator. He rode the elevator down with me but said nothing. At the lobby, I got in the elevator that takes me back to my floor. As the door closed, I heard someone say, “See that guy?”

I am paranoid that security is going to confront me. But have I done anything illegal? I may have exercised poor judgment and been squicky, but is it illegal to masturbate in a closed bathroom stall on private property?

Suddenly Pensive About Noontime Kicks

ORACLE SOUTH OF GRANT / 884-7210

It isn’t, SPANK, at least not in Seattle.

“There is an expectation of privacy in a bathroom stall,” says Seattle Police Department spokesperson Sgt. Sean Whitcomb. “So, obviously, what people do there is their personal business.”

If things went down exactly as you described, SPANK, you’re not in any legal danger, as you were doing your own private business in the privacy of a bathroom stall. The guy who peered into your stall, however, could be in trouble.

“Here’s the irony: The person peeping into the stall is the person we’d be interested in talking to,” says Whitcomb. “You don’t need to be peeping into the stall to see if someone is using it, and looking into a stall long enough to make a determination as to what the person is doing in that stall, exactly, is an indication that you’ve been looking a little longer than you need to.”

So, yeah, if anyone is going to jail here, SPANK, it’s the peeper who reported you to the office tower’s crack security team, not you.

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Forgive me for laughing, SPANK, but I’m having a hard time keeping a straight face. If someone called the actual cops about a toilet-wanker—and not, say, the Seattle Police Department’s polite and reasonable spokesperson—it’s the wanker who’ll wind up in handcuffs, not the caller. Beat cops don’t generally give the benefit of the doubt to guys rubbing ’em out in public toilets. They’ll assume you were cruising the toilet or, worse yet, that you’re the kind of perv who gets off to the sounds and smells of other men taking craps, and they’ll arrest you.

I’m stumped, Dan. In the novel Fifty Shades of Grey, which has been the subject of much discussion due to its controversial subject matter (a young woman gets involved in a BDSM relationship), the term “canning” is used numerous times.

Despite my best efforts, I cannot find a definition for this practice. Who else can I turn to but you?

Confused And Naive, New Era Definition It’s not canning (“a method of preserving food in which the food contents are processed and sealed in an airtight container”), it’s caning (“a form of corporal punishment consisting of a number of hits with a single cane usually made of rattan”).

I don’t know if the author of Fifty Shades of Grey dropped that extra “n” in there, CANNED, or if you did. But here’s hoping that millions of women all over the world aren’t fantasizing about having themselves canned by kinky billionaires. A person can survive—and even enjoy—a good thrashing. But being sealed in an airtight container? Not so much.

Full disclosure: I may be the only sex writer

58 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

on Earth who has yet to read Fifty Shades of Grey. While I plan to avoid reading Grey, just as I’ve avoided watching “2 Girls, 1 Cup” (and for similar reasons, i.e., I’m easily nauseated), I think it’s wonderful that this book is inspiring a whole new generation of American women to get their kink on.

I’m a 43-year-old woman, married for 19 years, and I need your help! Like most middle-age moms, I read Fifty Shades of Grey. I understand that it is fiction. But it has motivated me to spice things up in the bedroom. The problem is that my husband is a dud. He’s not open to trying anything that isn’t missionary or doggy. That’s the extent of it. I feel as if I’ve tried everything. He’s happy with the way things are. Period. What do I do?

Woman Has Interesting Perversions Here’s what you do: Get in a time machine, and go warn your younger self not to make the same mistake that so many women make in their 20s.

That is, dumping guys with relatively harmless, easily indulged kinks—the foot fetishists, the guys who wear panties, the guys who want their girlfriends to wear superhero costumes while they peg their ass—because kinky guys are “weird,” “not normal” or “probably gay.”

Backing way the hell up for a moment: I’ve been writing about sex and relationships, men and women, kinky sex and vanilla sex, for 20 years. It is my informed opinion that men typically become aware of their kinks—they typically become hyperaware of them—when they’re teenagers. Many women, on the other hand, don’t seem to become aware of their kinks until they’re in their 30s or 40s. Maybe it has something to do with the sexual peak, which men are believed to hit in their teens and women in their 30s (and which many people believe to be bullshit), or maybe it simply takes women longer to overcome the misogynist slut-shaming they’re subjected to as girls, and to openly embrace their sexualities and sexual interests.

Whatever the cause, I’ve seen it happen again and again: A woman tosses aside a series of decent but somewhat kinky guys until she finds a guy whose sexual interests are “normal,” e.g., missionary, doggy and no-hands-on-the-backof-the-head oral. And that’s the guy she marries.

Then, 10 or 20 years later, she develops some “weird,” “not normal,” “probably gay” sexual interests of her own. Now she wants to spice things up, but—fuckadoodledoo—20 years ago, she dumped a nice kinkster and married a total sexual dud instead.

So here’s what you do: Get in a time machine, and go tell your 20-something self not to dump someone because he’s kinky, WHIP, because one day, you’re going to come into your own kinks.

And when that day comes, you’ll want to be able to say something like this to your husband: “So, hey, you know how I’ve been jerking you off with my feet/letting you wear my panties/ dressing up like Aquagirl and fucking your ass for the last 19 years? It’s been a lot of fun, honey, and you know I love you, and you know I love your kinks. But it’s payback time. I just finished reading this book, and it really turned me on, and now I wanna get canned, and you’re going to can me.”

If you don’t have access to a time machine, WHIP, tell your husband that while he may be happy with the way things are, you’re not.

Which means things have to change.

CONFIDENTIAL TO THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA Thanks, man.

Find the Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage, and follow me @fakedansavage on Twitter.

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61

NEWS OF THE WEIRD

BY CHUCK SHEPHERD Send your Weird News to Chuck Shepherd, PO Box 18737, Tampa, Fla., 33679 weirdnews@earthlink.net or go to www.newsoftheweird.com

Gentlemen, Start Your Stereos Sophisticated automobile technology makes high-performance engines purr in relative silence, but automakers fear that their mostdemanding drivers are emotionally attached to the engines’ roar. Consequently, as Car and Driver reported in April, the 2012 BMW M5, with 560 horsepower tempered with sound deadeners, has installed pre-recorded engine noise, channeled into the car’s cabin via the stereo system. A computer program matches the amplitude of the engine’s growl to the driver’s accelerator-revving. In other automobile tech news, Peugeot technicians announced in March that they were preparing “mood paint” for the body of the company’s iconic RCZ model. The paint’s molecular structure would be alterable by heat sensors in the steering wheel and elsewhere that measure a driver’s stress levels. A calm driver might see his car turn green, for instance—but watch out for road-rage red!

The Continuing Crisis • With only 30,000 hotel rooms in Rio de Janeiro, and 50,000 visitors expected for the June United Nations Conference on Sustainable Development, officials persuaded owners of many of the city’s short-time “love hotels” (typically renting for four hours at a time) to change business plans for a few days to accommodate the delegates. A BBC News stringer reported that the hotels will remove some special fixtures and furniture, such as “erotic chairs” and velvet wall coverings, but that the large, round beds would stay. Fortunately, the conference does not begin until June 13.

The night of June 12 (“Lovers Day”) is a big income-producer for short-stay hotels.

• The Marine Wounded Warriors Battalion at Camp Lejeune, N.C., generally enjoys excellent support from the community, but in an April report of the Government Accountability Office, Marines complained of a “petting zoo” environment in which civilian charities and advertisers use the battalion to seek out “poster” faces and bodies that “looked the part” of wounded veterans, such as those severely burned or missing limbs. Warriors who suffer post-traumatic stress or brain injuries often appear outwardly “normal” and are likely to be ignored by the support organizations, thus setting a “bad tone” among the wounded.

• Not your classic perps: (1) In October, Dr. Kimberly Lindsey, 44, a deputy director of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s Laboratory Science, Policy and Practice Program Office, was charged with two counts of child molestation and bestiality involving a 6-year-old boy. (2) In April, Yaron Segal, 30, a post-doctoral researcher at a physics lab at MIT, was arrested upon arriving in Grand Junction, Colo., after arranging with a woman online to have sex with the woman’s underage daughter, an adventure that was the product of a law-enforcement sting. (Two weeks later, Segal was found dead in his jail cell of an 62 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

apparent suicide.)

• Oh, dear! (1) At a March Chicago Symphony Orchestra performance, the music continued uninterrupted as two patrons engaged in a fistfight over box seating.

Conductor Riccardo Muti “never stopped conducting,” said a patron. “He very gracefully, without missing a beat—literally—he brought (the second movement) to a very quiet and subdued close.” (2) It costs $8,500 (plus $3,000 annual dues) to join the ultra-prestigious New York Athletic Club, which counts Olympic champions among its upper-crust members.

However, an April brawl in a back room, said to have begun over a woman, saw (according to witnesses) fighting “wolf packs” in a “lion’s pit” that resulted in several bloody injuries, with two people sent to the hospital and three arrested.

Bright Ideas • Following her recent holiday in the United States, during which she passed through Boring, Ore. (pop. 12,000), Scotswoman Elizabeth Leighton returned home to suggest that officials in her hometown of Dull, Scotland, arrange for the two towns to become “sister cities,” even though they did not qualify under normal protocols because of Boring’s larger size. (The Oregon town was named for a Civil War soldier, William H. Boring.)

• Some villagers in China’s Shandong Province who are too poor or isolated to hook up to home heating fuel service have an alternative, according to a March report by China News Center: They take giant, heavy-duty balloons that resemble 15-foot-long condoms and walk to filling stations to inflate them with natural gas every four or five days. The danger of explosion is high, but the balloons remain many villagers’ best option.

People Different From Us Lawrence Cobbold, 38, has a house in Plympton, England, but has to make living arrangements at his parents’ home or elsewhere, because his place is totally taken over by his 21,000-item collection of bird ornaments and doodads. Before heading off to sleep elsewhere, he spends an average of four hours a day tidying up the collection. His dad (who described his other son as “completely normal”) said, “I just hope I die before (Lawrence). I don’t want to (have to) clear all this out.”

Least Competent Criminals Questionable strategy: Robert Strank, 39, was arrested in Beavercreek, Ohio, in April and charged with trying to rob the Huntington Bank. According to police, he approached the bank’s counter, but became ill and asked a teller to call 911 to summon medics. There were conflicting news reports about when medics arrived to treat Strank, but there was agreement that Strank recovered and subsequently presented the same teller his pre-written holdup note demanding cash. He was arrested in short order.

REAL ESTATE & RENTALS Condos/Townhouses

Real estate

NEAR NORTHWEST SIDE 2BR Townhouse on near Northwest side. Large walled yard, much parking. Large dogs okay. $725.00 per month. 520-591-2985

Manufactured Homes MANUFACTURED HOMES NEW 3 Bedroom / 2 Bath DOUBLEWIDE - CAVCO Durango Factory Order. Full Drywall. Hardwood Cabinets - 1st Quality, Lowest Price - $33,995! Home Outlet 1-800-493-2221. www.thehomeoutletaz.com. (AzCAN) Acreage/Land For Sale BUY ONE GET ONE FREE MUST SELL! Two 40 acre parcels. Tubac Foothills Ranch, w/electric. Both parcels for $72,500, must buy both. Call John @435-668-8783

Apartments 2 BEDROOM, 2 BATH Small fenced in back yard, W/D hookups, ceiling fans.

Full appliances, all electric, landlord pays water. 675/ month, near U of A, Park & Adelaide Area. Call 2375616 or 400-4062.

CENTRAL Large 1BR, wrought iron security, super clean, new a/c Italian tile floors, near Randolph Park, approved pets . $475/mo. w/year lease. Call 520-881-3712 or 520-272-9472

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REAL ESTATE & RENTALS 6

23.2350

Mind, Body, Spirit

Edited by Will Shortz Across 1 Cardinal making many round trips 8 â&#x20AC;&#x153;Going My Wayâ&#x20AC;?

Best Director winner 15 Depreciate 16 Pattern of highs and lows 17 â&#x20AC;&#x153;___ Comedy Classicsâ&#x20AC;? (syndicated TV series) 18 Pompadour and others 19 Not procrastinating 20 Brand of literature 22 Like some divorce decrees 23 Unmitigated 25 Astronomical stretch 26 â&#x20AC;&#x153;Enough already!â&#x20AC;?

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Massage Lovers Try my 90 min full body massage. In calls 24 hrs. Friendly, discreet, someone who cares about your needs. Audrey, cross dresser. 35 min E of Kolb off Hwy 10.

520-971-5884 Health & Wellness HEALTH PELVIC/TRANSVAGINAL MESH? Did you undergo transvaginal placement of mesh for pelvic organ prolapse or stress urinary incontinence between 2005 and present time?

If the patch required removal due to complications, you may be entitled to compensation. Call Johnson Law and speak with female staff members 1-800-535-5727.

(AzCAN) Licensed Massage BARBâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S MASSAGE Tune up your body! Relax, relieve sore muscles and stress Call for appointment 8AM till 6PM. LMT 294-6088 MASSAGE REFLEXOLOGY Relax, Recharge, Renew Tu-Fri 8:30-6:30 Martha Madsen, LMT (520) 7958223 ULTIMATE MASSAGE Doug Iman, LMT 721-7062 A QUALITY EXPERIENCE! 7 Days/Eves

FULL BODY MASSAGE Administered by 6 ft.

210 lbs body builder trainer. $35 1 hr. first time clients. Ask about free massage! Call Rick 954-683-8546 MASSAGE Hallieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s back! Nurturing & firm, combing Swedish, Thai & Shiatsu techniques. Relaxing & invigorating. Hallie, CMT, 575-0507 RELAX Your mind, body and soul with sweet sensations body works by Terry (female) 358-5914 RELAXING SPECIALS AVAILABLE Massage full body, call me Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll come to youmobile. 615-596-5020

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ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE

SMASHED THE PIPE. TOSSED THE STRAWS AND VIALS. DONE. REALLY? Cocaine annonymous â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re here & weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re freeâ&#x20AC;? www.caarizona.com 520-326-2211 SOOTHING OIL MASSAGE Relax and unwind with a soothing oil massage today. Call 520-5789600

TRANSFORMATIONAL BODYWORK Relaxing massage and breathwork for body and soul. Private studio, always a comfortable environment.

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38 Formula One racing legend Bruce 39 By 40 Old shippable shelter 41 Like many newscasts

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29 1978 Grammy winner for the jazz album â&#x20AC;&#x153;Friendsâ&#x20AC;?

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4

No. 1119

FRIDAY, JULY 13, 2012 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 7 PM CELEBRITY THEATRE PHOENIX

Tickets at the Celebrity Theatre Box Office.

Charge by phone at 602-267-1600 or online at www.celebritytheatre.com

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For further information call Charles F. Dickerson, Inc. International Auctioneers Ofc: 575-526-1106 Cell: 575-644-7445 Photos/Lists/Directions/Webpage: www.cfdauction.com

Hart Robinovitch â&#x20AC;˘ Zimmerman Reed, PLLP â&#x20AC;˘ 14646 N. Kierland Blvd, Suite 145, Scottsdale, AZ 85254

MAY 17 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 23, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

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