The River Journal, October 2012

Because there’s more to life than bad news

A News MAGAZINE Worth Wading Through

Science Chicks of Clark Fork High

Local News • Environment • Wildlife • Opinion • People • Entertainment • Humor • Politics

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A News Magazine Worth Wading Through ~just going with the flow~ P.O. Box 151•Clark Fork, ID 83811 www.RiverJournal. com•208.255.6957

STAFF Calm Center of Tranquility Trish Gannon-trish@riverjournal.com

Ministry of Truth and Propaganda Jody Forest-joe@riverjournal.com

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509.534.3625 Contents of the River Journal are copyright 2012. Reproduction of any material, including original artwork and advertising, is prohibited. The River Journal is published the first week of each month and is distributed in over 16 communities in Sanders County, Montana, and Bonner, Boundary and Kootenai counties in Idaho.

The River Journal is printed on 40 percent recycled paper with soy-based ink. We appreciate your efforts to recycle.

October 2012

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4 4. SCIENCE CHICKS OF CLARK FORK HIGH Meet six young women who are bucking the trends in education.

10. BONNER COUNTY ELECTIONS Those vying for your vote explain why they deserve it.

13. BOOTS: KEEPING ‘EM LAUGHING Scott Hancock gives tribute to a “real” cowboy.

14. THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER Don Clark takes a look at the phenomenon of “prepping.”

15. SHARP-SHINNED HAWK Mike takes a look at this bane of birdfeeders. A BIRD IN HAND 16. ON ELK & ATVS Matt reminds you there’s rules if you’re out in the woods. THE GAME TRAIL 17. HIKING THE WINDS Ernie takes a trip to the Wind River

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Range. THE HAWK’S NEST 18. NEIGHBORHOOD VAMPIRE? Lawrence relates the tale of a mysterious, pale woman. VALLEY OF SHADOWS 19. WHY SURREALISM MATTERS A short primer on the “art” of surprise. SURREALIST RESEARCH BUREAU 20. CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENTS Idaho voters will decide whether to change their founding document. A SEAT IN THE HOUSE 21. IT’S OUR OWN DAMNED FAULT. Five years later, only the names have changed. THE SCENIC ROUTE 22. VETS NEED TO VOTE THEIR INTERESTS And to Gil Beyer, that doesn’t mean vote Republican. VETERANS’ NEWS 23. HOME IS WHERE THE DOG IS Kathy discovers a new definition for

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home. KATHY’S FAITH WALK 24. OBITUARIES 25. CALENDAR Take a look at what’s happening in downtown Sandpoint 26. DOG DAYS OF CAMPING It’s a dangerous undertaking when you’re JINXED 27. TO AARGH IS POLITICS Scott offers some election day poetry.

SCOTT CLAWSON 28. SIZE MATTERS When Boots was outfished by his wife.

FROM THE MOUTH OF THE RIVER COVER PHOTO: by John Malison/Rachel Malison on the job.

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of Clark Fork High School by Trish Gannon

They call it the nation’s report card, and it plays a major role in the perception that education in America, despite the investment of around half of each state’s revenues into it, is in a tailspin of failure. And nowhere is that failure seen as more important than in the National Assessment of Educational Progress’ reports on American students’ abilities in the fields of math and science. Analyzing the report card over the years, the National Center for Educational Statistics states that, despite the concerns with American competitiveness, and the focus on improving education, there have been “few changes in levels of educational achievement across the two decades covered (by the report card).” While American students have “mastered the fundamentals” of various subjects, “few demonstrate competency with more sophisticated materials and tasks.”

With so much attention given to education and to various plans for ‘reform,’ we all understand the outlines of the basic picture. K–12 education in the U.S. lags behind many other industrial nations. The educational achievements of poor states—like Idaho—lag behind the rest of the nation. Students from rural areas do not do as well as those from more affluent neighborhoods. And when it comes to those critical areas of science and mathematics, girls simply do not do as well as boys.

And then there’s the small, rural, less-than-affluent high school out in Clark Fork, Idaho, U.S.A. which, in shades of Thomas the Tank Engine, steadily chugs away at blowing the lid off of every one of those ‘facts’ regarding education.

By almost any measure, students who attend school at Clark Fork are doing well. From test scores to graduation rates to community support, Clark Fork is flying high above its peers, and doing better every year. It has consistently been named one of the top small schools in the nation, and sends an enviable percentage of its graduates on to college.

So maybe it’s not surprising that of those students who leave its doors, there are many achieving success in sciencerelated fields—those young professionals whom many believe are the heart of the country’s future. And of those from Clark Fork, quite a few are female.

Here, we’d like to introduce you to just a few of those remarkable women, and to the work they’re doing.

Rachel Malison, Class of 2001 Rachel Malison, class valedictorian for 2001, received a B.A. from the University of Montana in 2004, her M.S. from Idaho State University in 2008, and is looking forward to receiving her PhD in Systems Ecology from the University of Montana in the spring of 2013. Currently working

on her dissertation, she lives in Bigfork, Montana.

“For my PhD I am studying the influence of beavers on juvenile salmon ecology in a large river floodplain in western Alaska,” she wrote. “A typical day in my PhD really depends on the time of year. In the winter (I’m generally) working on my computer, analyzing data and writing, identifying insect samples, or working on presentations, but occasionally we sample in the winter months as well. In the spring-fall while I was collecting data, a typical day included living in a wall tent five hours by jet boat from the nearest town in the Alaskan bush, jet boating up a remote river, sampling beaver ponds and spring brooks for juvenile salmon using minnow traps, collecting insect samples or habitat data and then returning to our camp for the evening.”

She enumerates the ways the school

supported her success as, “small class sizes, personal attention, and opportunity to take 7 (or was it 8?) different science classes because our science teacher was able to offer all of these different options.” Not surprisingly, her science teacher, Richard Hanna (since retired), was one of her favorite teachers. “My interest in aquatic ecology started with Mr. Hanna’s ecology class, where we got to go out and sample local streams.”

(Brian Powell, who teaches business and economics, was also a favorite.)

Rachel believes the trend is for an increased presence of women in ecology careers, pointing out that many graduate students in the field are now female, and high school plays a critical role in that.

“You have to be interested in math and science early,” she explained. “If you

Rachel Malison leave high school with the interest then you are more likely to start off in college taking the necessary classes. I think engaging students in science while still in high school is important.”

This is something she credits Clark Fork with doing well. “By offering a wide array of math and science classes at Clark Fork, students will have the opportunity to find out where their interests lie. As I mentioned earlier, I took as many science and math classes as I could in high school.

Many of the people I have met since did not ever have the option of taking an ecology class in high school.” She adds that “Clark Fork is unique,” pointing out that fewer students can allow for multiple classes across a given discipline, given there’s not a need for “five different sections of the same biology course. This allows multiple types of science classes to

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be available to students—or at least it did when I was there,” she said.

As a small school, there’s a perception in the county that Clark Fork is less capable than the much larger high school located in Sandpoint at the county seat, a perception Rachel says her own parents grappled with. “I almost went to Sandpoint High School because, for a while, my parents thought I would get a better education there. However, we decided I would attend Clark Fork (and) I am glad I did. I had so many opportunities at Clark Fork and was very well prepared to embark on my college education. Soon you can call me Dr. Malison!”

Corinne Haase, Class of 2004 Corinne Haase left Clark Fork in 2004 to attend the University of Idaho, then transferred Boise State. She student taught through U of I in 2009 and finished her secondary education degree to become a teacher of mathematics.

Then came a couple of engineering classes, and two more years at Boise State, where she received an extra two degrees, one in civil engineering and another in mathematics. “During my last year of school I had an internship at McClendon Engineering, a structural firm in Boise, and I worked there the summer after graduation. In November 2011, I moved to Minot, North Dakota and started working for Moore Engineering at their new branch office in Minot,” she said.

Corinne describes Moore Engineering as a civil engineering consulting firm, and she works for them as a project engineer.

“Minot is seeing huge growth due to the oil boom in western North Dakota and our firm does a lot of development work and works for many small municipalities in North Dakota,” she said. “So far I’ve helped design sanitary sewer, water, and storm water systems and streets for new developments, as well as designing solutions to rehabilitate old and failing systems.

“Basically, whatever you see as you’re driving around on city streets is the work of a civil engineer,” she added.

“I design how water gets to and from a house, place hydrants, inlets, culverts, street signs, and sidewalk, grade curb and gutter and streets, and design retention for storm water. I create construction plans and I’ve had the opportunity to be on a construction site watching things I’ve designed get built. It’s pretty awesome to see something that you’ve designed become such a visible part of a community. I can’t drive down a street anymore without noticing all of these design elements that I used to take for granted,” she explained.

Corinne says that coming from a small high school helped her achieve her goals. “I loved high school. And I particularly loved going to a small school.

The environment was so friendly and comfortable; I never felt unsafe or judged. I felt that the education that was provided was well rounded and I honestly feel I could have taken any career path after graduating high school.” She added, “The classes I gravitated towards were the ones that weren’t traditional lecture classes, like science, math, and business.”

Like many of her peers who have entered what once were non-traditional fields for women, she notes, “Larry Smith was my favorite teacher at Clark Fork. I was the only student in Calculus my senior year. I’m sure the majority of my homework wasn’t even turned in on paper because we would work through most of the problems on the board during class. I think Mr. Smith and I viewed math very similarly—each problem was like a little puzzle and you just had to figure out the twist in order to solve it. We would listen to music and share stories and work on calculus. That class was probably the most influential factor in my decision to pursue a career in math.”

Corinne thinks the biggest obstacle for women in science and math is simply the perception that these are fields reserved for men. “I... think society is (still) trying to break out of the mentality that men are supposed to go to work and women are supposed to stay at home. But even when women do decide to pursue careers, they still lean towards ones that involve caring for people, like teaching, social work, and nursing to name a few. I really think so few females pursue science careers because they are viewed as predominantly male fields. There is an advantage that women have in that... (they) aren’t always expected to pursue careers; therefore when they decide to they typically go for a career they really know they are going to enjoy. If a female chooses a science path, they’re going to do it because they are passionate about it and they’re willing to break social norms to pursue that career. I think women are uniquely suited to succeed in science careers because of the drive and perseverance it takes to get there.”

Clark Fork, for Corinne, is uniquely suited to raising a generation of mathematicians and scientists, at least in part because “Clark Fork has such

Corinne Haase an abundance of math- and sciencerelated resources within the community.

Industries such as forestry, hydrology, water resources, environmental science, biology, geology, civil engineering, and more are all prevalent in Clark Fork.”

Her advice for the next generation?

“Get students outside, get community members involved who would be willing to share some of their experiences, tap into some of the resources outside of the school that are available. If I had the opportunity, I’d be more than happy to talk to a group of students who wanted to hear about what I do and I think there are many others out there who would do the same. I think students really respond when you can offer them more than just a lecture format class.”

The only area Corinne saw as lacking in her high school education was preparation for a career. “I didn’t even know what engineers did when I graduated high school,” she explained.

“I went into education because it was the only career I could think of that used math and then continued into engineering for the same reason. Jobs don’t fit into categories like “English,” “Math,” or “Science.” Yes, I use math at my job but I also use technical writing, presentation, and oral communication skills. I really believe in professional technical courses and job shadowing opportunities that really allow a student to experience what a particular career might be like.”

Jennifer Gauthier, Class of 2005 Graduating in 2005, Jennifer Gauthier Contin;ued on next page

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attended Lewis Clark State College and received a BS in Radiographic Science, and is working on getting a degree in Sectional Imaging/MRI as well. She currently works at Bonner General Hospital as a Computed Tomography (CT) Technologist.

“I work with physicians, other medical staff and patients to get diagnostic images using x-radiation. I operate a CT machine and computer systems that use a helical/ axial beam, different algorithms, and IV contrast to acquire images of internal structures such as organs, vessels, etc.

These images are used to diagnose various conditions,” she explained.

Getting to this point, she says, was supported by attending a small school, which “helped me to realize my potential.”

Showing how closely science and math are intertwined, Jenn’s favorite teacher at Clark Fork was also Larry Smith. “He always encouraged me to keep learning.

He showed me that even if I didn’t get something right away it didn’t mean I was never going to get it, I just had to keep trying; that when I wasn’t solving a problem one way, to try to solve it by taking a different path.”

Jenn thinks a barrier for women in pursuing these types of fields is “a lack of awareness of all the opportunities that a math/science education can lead to. I also think there is a misconception that you have to be a “genius” to pursue math or science; this is just so false,” she

Jennifer Gauthier

explained. “By bringing awareness to the fields and exposing how exciting and fun they actually are, people’s views would change.”

Jenn would like to see Clark Fork continue to grow the level of community involvement at the school, even beyond the traditional ‘booster’ types of activities. “Sports are such a success (for students) at Clark Fork because the community is so involved,” she said.

“There are a lot of resources that Clark Fork is able to take advantage of.”

For female students interested in pursuing careers in science or math, Jenn points out there are a lot of programs that cater specifically to that interest. “The one I worked with was called Expanding Your Horizons,” she said. “It was strictly focused on showing young females how many options there are in these fields, and just how interesting those options can be.”

You can learn more about this program at ExpandingYourHorizons.org.

Cassandra Hagerman, Class of 2006 A member of Clark Fork’s class of 2006, Cassie Hagerman attended the University of Idaho, receiving a Bachelor’s degree in Wildlife Resources. After her sophomore year she applied for a Student Career Experience Program with the U.S. Forest Service on the Kaibib National Forest in Arizona, where she worked as a wildlife biologist in the summers of 2008 and 2009. Upon her graduation from college, she was hired full time by the Forest Service and moved to Fredonia, Ariz., “With the Grand Canyon to the south and Bryce Canyon and Zion National Park to the north, all within a hour’s drive,” she said.

There is no such thing as a ‘typical day’ for a wildlife biologist, and Cassie explains, “I have a lot of different tasks depending on the time of year. My field season usually starts in May when I do marsh bird and Kaibab squirrel surveys. The Kaibab squirrel is a subspecies of the Abert’s squirrel and is only found on the north rim of the Grand Canyon, and has tufted ears and big white tail with a gray body,” she said. “After those surveys end in June I start goshawk prey transects, where I look and listen for 18 different prey species from 4 am to 9 pm from June through August. I have Swainson’s hawk, Peregrine falcon, northern goshawk, and on some occasions Mexican spotted owl surveys. That’s a typical summer for me.”

At the beginning of this year, she explained, “I started looking

for Houserock Valley chisel-toothed kangaroo rat mounds. This animal is a sub-species of kangaroo rats only found within the Houserock Valley of Northern Arizona. I looked for mounds of sandy soil with burrow holes and kangaroo rat tracks and tail drags.”

Cassie also gets some time with animals a little more familiar to a North Idaho girl. “In March of 2011 and 2012 I helped Arizona Game and Fish with their body condition study of mule deer on their winter range on the North Kaibab Ranger District. Mule deer does were net gunned from a helicopter and then transported to “base,” where the deer were weighed, had blood drawn, had rump fat thickness measured, and were checked for diseases and mites. AZGFD also put tracking collars on the deer to track their migration over two years. The deer were then released to return to their herd.

“I have also worked with Northern Arizona University, mist netting bats over waters on the North Kaibab and tracking them to their roosts in the Grand Canyon and Kanab Creek Wilderness. We learned that female bats will travel up to 17 miles from their maternity roost sites to find water on the Kaibab!”

And in a sign of the diverse wildlife in what’s generally considered to be a rather arid state, she added, “I have worked with Rocky Mountain Research Station and their goshawk specialists who had been studying the northern goshawk population on the Kaibab Plateau for 20 years.

“On the subject of goshawks, a couple years ago the wildlife shop (there were four of us at the time on the North Kaibab) monitored three goshawk nests and their reaction to logging trucks passing by the nests on forest roads.” You can read the report on the study online at http://tinyurl.com/csvflxq.

“Last year we hung bat barks,” she said, “artificial structures made to resemble sloughing bark on Ponderosa pines, in areas around water sources with few old and large trees. Bats use these barks as temporary shelters when they are foraging on the forest.”

Of course, it’s not all about studying the wildlife. “In the winter months I am in the office working on National Environmental Policy Act documents for various projects on the North Kaibab.

Right now I am initiating a meadow encroachment project and writing the NEPA for it.

“Also in the winter, I enter all our data we collected from the summer into the Natural Resource Information System.”

Luckily, the paperwork doesn’t last.

Cassie Hagermann “Last week I got to ride horses into the wilderness and check out some dams the CCC had built on the only perennial watershed on the North Kaibab Ranger District in the 30s. A couple years ago some of those dams were reconstructed to accommodate the Apache trout in the stream.”

Her work with the Forest Service involves working with “several other land, state, and federal agencies,” like the National Park Service, and U.S. Fish and Wildlife. “I also get the opportunity to help in the wildland fire world. I got to go to Prescott, Ariz. and attend the Arizona Wildfire Incident Management Academy this year, where I studied Basic Wildland Fire and Fire Behavior.”

Clark Fork’s small size worked to Cassie’s advantage in high school. “Since Clark Fork is such a small school I didn’t get as many opportunities to take a variety of science classes that larger schools may offer, but I did have the chance to have more one-on-one with teachers who cared about the students,” she said. “Now that I live in another small town (Fredonia is about 1,500 people), and I work with people who have kids in the school system here (and one of my good friends was an English teacher at Fredonia High School), I hear a lot about how the kids just aren’t motivated and the teachers don’t seem to care. It makes me really appreciate the community that Clark Fork really is.”

That community extended to the

staff at the school. “I can’t say that I had just one favorite teacher, because I got to know each teacher fairly well and I pretty much had the same ones throughout high school. So, I had a favorite teacher for each subject! All my teachers seemed to care about the students, too. Like I said before, I really appreciate the opportunity I had a Clark Fork with teachers who cared and being able to get to know them.”

Cassie believes her exposure to science while she was growing up led to her pursuing this field, and thinks many females overlook science and math careers simply because they don’t have that exposure. “Sometimes it’s hard for me to believe that there are people who don’t like to be outside because those are the only people I’ve really known!”

Another part of Cassie’s work lets her give back some of what was given to her by virtue of growing up in North Idaho. “On the North Kaibab we work with Fredonia schools and put on a Kids in the Woods program for them. Each program on the district puts on their own demonstration/activity for the kids over a two-day span. The kids also get to camp out with the recreation program.

I think that’s great experience for the kids and introducing/reintroducing them to nature.” And that’s just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to introducing young people to real-life science. “In 2011, I put on a four-weekend program with a grant from Cornell Lab of Ornithology that targeted kids Kindergarten through sixth grade and taught them about 16 local bird species. I think that introducing girls at a young age to all the different aspects of science is one way that we can change the number of those who pursue a science degree,” she offered. “Science fields have been dominated by males for so long, and really they still are, so to be a female in that field can sometimes be a little intimidating. I, as a woman, get approached a lot to do programs with younger children, more so than male biologists I work with. I think there is the thought that women will be more apt to work with kids.”

Cassie thinks the limits of a smalltown education are being eliminated through technology. “I like the fact that Clark Fork is now offering more online college courses for students. I think that will really give kids the opportunity to

take different science and math classes that might interest them. I remember biology in high school being very handson, too. I really enjoyed being able to see the results in my hand and that kept me interested!”

If there’s a drawback to Cassie’s work, it’s that, “As a wildlife biologist for the Forest Service I manage habitat and don’t really get the chance to get my hands on animals. I included pictures of the rare times I actually get to have animals in hand!”

Anna Wallace, Class of 2007 After her graduation in 2007, Anna went on to attend Central Washington University, graduating in 2011 with a double major in Psychology and in Primate Behavior and Ecology. “The second degree,” she explained, “is an interdisciplinary degree between biology, anthropology and psychology.” She also minored in Political Science.

Currently, Anna is working for the Fauna Foundation, located on the south shore of Montreal in Quebec, Canada.

The Fauna Foundation is a chimpanzee, monkey and farm sanctuary. She says, “Most of the chimpanzees are former biomedical test subjects and a few of them are rescued from zoos in Quebec that no longer wanted them. Two of the former lab chimps that currently live at Fauna were infected with HIV during their lives in the lab.”

A typical work day for Anna involves, “cleaning enclosures, designing and preparing enrichment, administering medication (including giving an insulin injection), and preparing and serving meals. I also participate in operant conditioning training to work toward getting the chimpanzees to present parts of their body for inspection (so we can safely examine them for health problems without having to put them under anesthesia).”

There aren’t many non-human primate species found in Bonner County (okay, there aren’t any, actually), but Anna’s path to the Fauna Foundation started out in Clark Fork, where she says she was “pointed in the right direction,” by then-counselor Connie Kimble. “I can safely say I would not be here without her advising me and telling me that there were chimpanzees in a school in Ellensburg, Washington!” she laughed.

Succeeding there, however, she credits to “a good foundation in biology and math classes,” imparted by Richard Hanna and

by Larry Smith, who is currently still teaching math at the school, along with good English skills. She wrote, “These Continued on next page

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classes were very helpful because I had to later take a number of biology courses and two quarters in statistics as well.

Most of all though, I had a really excellent base for writing papers thanks to Chandra Martz’s English classes. All of my college courses required some kind of writing skill and I was lucky enough to have some skills already developed from high school.

To get a science degree—or really any degree—you need to be able to write!”

While these classes gave her a strong foundation to build on, Anna also has high praise for K.C. MacDonald, who currently teaches government and social studies. “(I took) his political science class in my senior year. It really challenged me to think for myself and Mr. Mac had a way of making his classes very engaging,” she explained.

Anna believes a major obstacle for women in science is that, “... a stereotype that starts early on that pegs women in one type of field and men in another.

Girls are often encouraged to follow one path and boys another. Gender does not necessarily suit you for your career path; your interests and what the people around you encourage you to follow has the most effect on what you choose to do with your life.”

The way around, or through, that stereotype, she suggests, is hands-on education. “The more hands-on things you get to participate in, the better.”

She hopes that if students are shown the different career options in scientific fields, and know that math and science classes “are their ticket towards them,” more people will be drawn into science as a career. Career aside, however, she thinks its important that students know,

Anna Wallace

“Not every career path may seem like it needs a lot of math or science, but it might surprise you how much is really needed to even get an interview.

You can learn more about the animals Anna works with online at FaunaFoundation.org.

Megan Hess, Class of 2008 Megan Hess, who graduated from Clark Fork in 2008, doubled majored in Marine Science and Geology at the University of Hawaii, Hilo. In 2010 she was awarded the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration’s Hollings Scholarship, which helped pay tuition for her last two years of school, in addition to giving her a paid internship working at the Northwest Fisheries Science Center in Seattle, Wash. “This was such an amazing opportunity, where I got to get hands-on experience in the professional world.”

In May of 2012, her BS in Marine Science and Geology (with honors) in hand, she explained, “I was lucky enough to get the first job I applied for out of school. Two weeks after my graduation I moved to Cordova, Alaska and started working as a full-time, biological lab and field technician at the Prince William Sound Science Center. This is a nonprofit organization undertaking various research projects.”

Megan described her job, and a typical day at work. “I am currently working as a lab and field tech for a Principal Investigator (PI) named Tom Kline. He is a biological oceanographer whose most recent research has focused on herring energetics and the effects of straying hatchery salmon on wild salmon. These are the two projects that I am currently

assisting him with. In the herring energetics study he is looking at how much energy juvenile herring need to survive their first winter in the Prince William Sound. Within this study he is also looking at stable isotopes as a tool to determine if lower energy levels correlate with competition for food sources when food availability is low during the winter months. My part in this project is to collect, prepare, and analyze these samples.

“What I enjoy most about my job is that it is always changing and I get a good mix of being outdoors in the field and downtime in the lab. A typical day in the lab consists of me either removing scales and otoliths (earbones) from herring and weighing and drying them, or grinding and weighing out “fish dust” into tiny little capsules. This is how you prepare them for the Mass Spectrometer machine used to determine stable isotope ratios. I also work a lot on database management and random laboratory maintenance things while I am in the lab.

When I am out in the field I am either helping fish for herring samples or, most recently, I was helping map salmon habitat for the upcoming salmon study we are conducting. This is definitely my favorite part of the job! Getting to go out and explore the Prince William Sound is amazing (as it’s) one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen. It’s a really great time to learn about science from the various scientists aboard, along with locals ; (both groups) have so much knowledge to share about the area and history. Getting paid to be on a boat and outdoors is true happiness for me.

Overall, my job fluctuates a lot and I think that is partly what drew me into science. I love the whole process it takes to conduct research and how beneficial its outcomes can be to humans and the environment.”

Coming from a small town and a small school was more than just beneficial, Megan says. “Clark Fork had everything to do with my career choice and where I am today. I can actually (take) my interest in science and the outdoors all the way back to the days of Hope Elementary when we studied the endangered Bull Trout in the sixth grade with Fish and Game. My interest remained throughout middle school and well into high school, where I had the pleasure to take Mr. Richard Hanna’s classes. The class that sticks out most to me was his Ecology class, where we spent a lot of time outdoors, conducting our own research.

This was a very hands-on course that really got me excited and interested in science.”

It wasn’t just science classes that

Page | The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| October 2012

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MegAn Hess of my questions but would still make me think for myself. He took his classes out of the classroom and into the real, handson world of science. His classes really prepared me for college level science classes. I also think Mr. Powell deserves mentioning in that not only did he enhance my computer skills, but he really challenged his students in being creative and to think for themselves.”

Megan agrees that more females appear to be engaging in scientific fields of study, and remarks that in her own field of study, “Females are taking over!

My graduating class in Marine Science was mostly female and here at the science center, the staff is dominated by women. To me, this is refreshing because women and men are equally talented and

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supported her goals, however; Megan says the school prepared her well for college. “I can’t even express how much Mr. Smith’s math classes helped me in all my science classes and my career today. A Bachelor’s of Science degree is not an easy thing to get through; by taking all of Mr. Smith’s classes, it was so much easier to understand the Calculus classes I had to take, as well as physics, statistics, and geology. I really felt like I had an upper hand in knowing just the basics of mathematics, (compared to) various students at my college who really struggled to get through these classes. I owe Mr. Smith a lot.

“Not only do the science and math programs deserve credit at CFHS,” she continued, “but this is where I learned to write, research, and think critically. Chandra Martz was not only an amazing English teacher but also brought the Academic Decathlon to CFHS. As our coach she showed us how to have fun learning and, most importantly, how to study. This was a skill gained at CFHS that was essential to making it through my college career.

Clark Fork gave me the well rounded education I needed to make it through two very tough and challenging degrees.”

With that much support, Megan said it would be too difficult to pick a favorite teacher, though she enjoyed both Smith’s and Hanna’s classes the most due to the way they challenged her. She added, “I enjoyed the laughter that Mr. Smith could bring while doing math and that he never let you give up on yourself. He was so good at showing different approaches to problems and you could just tell how much he cared about your understanding of the concepts he was teaching. Mr. Hanna was really good at answering all

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successful in science and math careers.

Through my experience, I have found that women are uniquely suited for science careers in that they are very driven and very hard workers. Some of the most intelligent people I have met have been women in science, particularly my adviser in college, Dr. Tracy Wiegner, who is a Chemical Oceanographer.”

The way to keep the path toward careers in science and math open, not just to females but to all students, is to “keep kids interested in this area, and that all comes down to the teachers. (Students) need to have good teachers like I did to keep them interested and teach them the basics. Math really needs someone like Mr. Smith, who makes math fun and will help explain concepts over and over again until you get it. Science needs someone like Mr. Hanna, who will take kids out to a stream and show them hands-on research. Really, all you need are teachers who care enough about their students, and that is something Clark Fork has. The entire staff of CFHS truly cares about their students and that’s what makes it such a great learning environment.”

And what is taught is not just the nuts and bolts of education, but “how to communicate and interact with people.

Growing up in a small community shows you what it means to care for each other and get along with people who are different from you. I think CFHS not only turns you into a well-rounded student, but a well-rounded person in general.

You learn how to be nice and treat other people with respect, (and) that’s really what gets you through life.”

To learn more about the Prince William Sound Science Center, visit their website at www.pwssc.org/ A high school education is important given that it lays the foundation for where a young adult will leap off into the world. For a student interested in math and science, and where those disciplines might take them—maybe especially if that student is female—then conventional wisdom may be wrong about small, rural, poor high schools. Because it appears that Clark Fork, which is all those things, is also something more: it’s a great launching pad.

The Lake Pend Oreille School District offers open enrollment; students anywhere in the district may attend Clark Fork High School if they desire. If you’re interested in having your child attend Clark Fork, give them a call at 208-255-7177. Transportation is available.

October 2012| The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page

Bonner County Elections

A

lthough it’s been a fairly quiet election season in Bonner County (compared, say, to the primary elections), nonetheless there are some hotly contested races for voters to decide this November 6.

Over at the Federal Building, two commissioner seats are up for grabs. The election for District One will bring a new face to the county table, when voters choose between former Senator Joyce Broadsword, the Republican candidate, and local farmer (and retired teacher) Steve Johnson, who’s running as an Independent.

The District Three race is a surprise since the primary: current Commissioner Lewis Rich, who lost the Republican nomination in the primary, has declared as a write-in candidate against the Republican winner, Cary Kelly, who won the primary in a tight race.

Over at the Sheriff’s office, current Sheriff Daryl Wheeler is facing off against former deputy Rocky Jordan. And in the quietest race yet (though one that can have a major impact on Bonner County residents), it’s a three-way contest for the position of County Prosecutor, with incumbent Louis Marshall (R) coming up against former Prosecutor Tevis Hull (who is currently Chief Deputy Prosecutor in Boundary County) (I), and Independent candidate Michael Waldrup, a local attorney and former Deputy Prosecutor.

At the state representative level, Democrat Andrew Sorg is up against incumbent Eric Anderson (R) for the Representative 1A position, though Sorg is not running an active campaign.

Representative 1B George Eskridge is unopposed, as is Senator Shawn Keough.

It’s fair to say that every candidate, in their own words, is a Boy Scout: loyal, faithful, true. They are leaders, who will spend your money fairly yet keep your taxes low, and they believe in good roads. To learn anything beyond that is a challenge for a humble little publication like this one, and each election it’s a struggle to decide exactly how to present information.

For the 2012 general election, the decision was to ask each of the candidates to explain to you just how they differ from their challenger(s); what sets them apart, and gives you a reason to choose one over the other. Without further ado, here are their answers.

enough where almost everyone knows an officer or someone in the criminal justice system well enough to ask them direct questions about the work I do. This is not a job for a politician. It is a job for someone you can trust.

First and foremost, I listen to investigating officers when making decisions. I deeply respect the work they do and I am very thankful they support me.

Second, I listen to victim advocates and the stories of the victims, themselves. If I believe there is probable cause to support the charge, typically I file it. I don’t worry about losing the case or whether the suspect has money or influence. I believe all people should be judged equally under the law. I think this distinguishes me as a prosecutor. I also am always open to opinions that may differ from mine.

The job of prosecutor is arguably the toughest job in local government.

You are tasked with making decisions that inevitably make some people angry, sad or disappointed. It is critical for the prosecutor to make these decisions based on the facts and law.

I believe the area that separates me the most from the other candidates is my stance on people who hurt children. I have consistently fought for tough sentences against child molesters and have been successful far more often than I have failed.

As President of the Idaho Prosecuting Attorneys Association, I have lobbied for tougher penalties for offenders who hurt children. I fully supported Senator Joyce Broadsword’s legislation to put more teeth into the injury to child felony crime.

While I was greeting people at the Bonner County Fair this year a young girl who had been the victim of a horrendous crime by a family friend came by and talked to me. Sgt. Phyllis Jay and I had to try the offender twice, but the second trial ended with a guilty verdict and life sentence. It struck me that even with all the pain the young lady has had to go through, at least tonight she can sleep safely. That is the reason I want to continue fighting for this community.

Michael Waldrup

can bring. At U of I Law School I tried out for and got one of four spots on the school Trial Team. The training and experience we received on Trial Team was invaluable in starting a career as a criminal and civil trial attorney.

In addition, when I was a deputy prosecuting attorney, I had the privilege of being selected for numerous trial advocacy trainings at the National Advocacy Center in South Carolina. Those trainings are some of the very best that an attorney can receive. Later, when I worked at a large private firm, I had the opportunity to be involved in high level negotiations with state and federal agencies such as Idaho Fish and Game, Idaho DEQ, US Fish and Wildlife, the Federal Energy Regulatory Commission and EPA. Those negotiations concerned land and water use issues and taught me a great deal about how to effectively coordinate common and competing interests.

For the last seven years I have been successfully running my own legal practice. As a candidate I bring my business understanding, my trial trainings, the many jury trials I have been a part of, and the experience of high pressure negotiations. All of those things, together with the fact that I am actually from here, make me the most qualified person for the job.

I am running as an Independent candidate because the position of Prosecuting Attorney should not be partisan or about catering to political agendas. It should be about protecting our citizens, getting the bad guys and supporting victims.

I believe we should be fiscally conservative and socially responsible. If I am elected I will make better use of your tax dollars by focusing on violent crimes and helping and supporting victims. I will free up valuable time and space by starting a law enforcement diversion program for nonviolent offenses. Research has shown that diversion through treatment saves taxpayer dollars, leads to less repeat offenders, and eases court congestion.

I will put the focus on prosecuting crimes of violence and property crimes. I will put more energy into helping victims of crimes and more energy into community outreach. I want to restore that sense of community with law enforcement that was here when I grew up. Our fine citizens need to know that local law enforcement takes its duties to protect and serve seriously.

I also want voters to know that I will not do private work from or at a public office.

What it boils down to is that I intend on bringing common sense and ethics to the

Running for Bonner County Prosecutor, (Ind.) To the fine citizens of Bonner County: I am running for local office because I strongly care about the Bonner County community. I want to help make Bonner County a better place and I have the tools Running for Bonner County Prosecutor and understanding to get it done. I grew up (Rep., incumbent) here and I am familiar with local concerns My record is very clear and I hope and issues. I am the best candidate for the people make an informed decision on job because of that familiarity and because November 6. This community is still small of the experience and knowledge that I Page 10 | The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| October 2012

Louis Marshall

job. I hope I have your vote on November 6.

Tevis Hull is also running for Bonner County Prosecutor on the Independent ticket. He did not respond to our request for information.

Daryl Wheeler

Running for Bonner County Sheriff (Rep., incumbent) Two words describe the difference between me and my opponent: Experience and Leadership.

First the experience. I hold all Idaho POST training certificates: Basic, Intermediate, Advanced, Supervisor, Management and Executive. All of my education is tied to real life experience.

My certificates are tied to multiple years of on-the-job practice. I have 26 years of law enforcement experience under my belt. My opponent has some experience as a reserve, a few years as a deputy and an online degree. Theory without practice does not hold up in the real world.

Under my leadership as your sheriff for the last four years, I have successfully managed a $5 million dollar budget, increased first responder critical skills training, prioritized successful investigations of major crimes, reorganized the work spaces to make them safer and more effective, and reduced the number of positions at the top, in order to put more deputies on the streets where they are needed. I did all this while managing to be accessible and responsive to the community.

To increase transparency, my office produces a quarterly, online newsletter and an annual report which can be viewed by the people I serve at www.bonnerso. org. This was not attempted by previous administrations.

I am valued by my peers. I currently serve as the President of the Idaho Sheriff’s Association and successfully passed two important pieces of legislation which help protect the public. This spring I was a speaker at the Western States Sheriff’s Association and addressed the issues of the 10th Amendment, Interposition and how to be a Coordinating Agency.

While travelling down south to oversee a meeting for the Idaho Sheriffs, I noticed something very interesting. In each county a similar type of sign was posted. “Remove the Corruption, vote for “--.” These signs appear to be a boiler-plate theme to remove incumbent sheriffs. My opponent uses similar rhetoric in his literature.

On the subject of decision making, my answer is the same as it was in 2008.

“Under my leadership, all members of the Bonner County Sheriff’s Office will focus

on doing the right thing at all times—today and in the future. We will consult and plan before we act and decide.”

Rocky Jordan

Running for Bonner County Sheriff (Const.)

Everything I do in my life has a theme running through it. I want to make my family proud, make God proud. I owe so much to my family; right down to the fact that I have wonderful children, perfect grandchildren and thanks to my favorite grandma, who was Native American, I learned tolerance. I was brought up to believe respect is something to be earned and I will be going in as Sheriff knowing I will need to earn the respect of the deputies and prove to them they have my respect. Morale is a very big deal to me.

Morale in the administration is very high right now, but to me the people who put their lives on the line every single day deserve to love their jobs again. Another theme in my background is the belief in education and training; most people would be surprised at how much training their deputies already have and most of them are on a constant quest to obtain more.

My budgetary priorities are different; we are in tough economic times and money needs to go to the troops for their training.

There is certain mandatory training for the Sheriff and Under Sheriff but most of the training should go to the deputies.

We’ll hit areas like domestic violence, handling sexual assaults and working with the mentally handicapped. We’ll advance our training toward juveniles who make mistakes and help them get their lives back on track instead of ruining their lives.

We don’t need a plane and we don’t need a lab. Fuel money we put into the plane is of better use in the vehicles.

Fairchild and the Civil Air Patrol are there for us any time we need them. I’ve been talking to some of the departments and will continue the talks about the money we can save by pooling our purchases. We also need to train together because we work together in incidents such as bomb scares and shootings. Insurance money for the plane will buy enough bullets for our people to be able to practice their shooting and continue to successfully qualify.

We need the right kind of reserves; those who do as I did and qualify to be Level one, Level two and Level threes.

These reserves who achieve the highest status must pass background checks and go through an oral board. They must graduate from the reserve academy and successfully undergo training by at least two field training officers.

We will re-explore the concept of resident deputies; budget wise I don’t know yet if it’s feasible, but because we cover 19,000 square miles, it needs to be considered.

We need the Bonner County Search and Rescue and I will work to mend fences with them. We need the respect, trust and involvement of the community. Please visit my website at www.rockyjordan.com for more about me; email me or call me with your questions. The Sheriff’s Office belongs to the people.

Joyce Broadsword

Running for Bonner County Commissioner, 1st District (Rep.) There are several differences between my opponent and me. I have proven my leadership abilities in the State Senate.

The biggest difference between us is the experience I would bring to the position.

My years in the state legislature have prepared me to address the complex issues and needs of our citizens. For the last six years, I have been an active member of the Joint Finance and Appropriations Committee, giving me firsthand experience in budget setting and cost cutting during tough economic times. I have been a good steward of the tax payer’s dollars— spearheading the elimination of programs which were either duplicative or no longer viable. While serving as Vice Chairman of the Senate Health and Welfare Committee over the past eight years, my duties included chairing the meetings during rules review for the first several weeks of each session. I have served on a number of different committees, gaining knowledge and understanding of a vast array of issues.

The contacts and good working relationships I have developed with state and federal agency folks, our constitutional officers, state legislators, and our federal delegation could be of great benefit to our county.

I have a proven track record of working with diverse groups to find common sense solutions to complex problems. It has been an honor and a privilege to serve the people of Idaho in the senate, and I look forward to serving the citizens of Bonner County should my campaign be successful.

As a small business owner for over 34 years, I understand the issues faced by those trying to scratch out a living in a rural community. My family has been in Bonner County for over a hundred years.

Both my husband and I and our three children were born here; we love this area and want it to be viable for our three grandchildren, if they decide to stay here to raise their future families.

Continued on next page

October 2012| The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page 11

Steve Johnson

Running for Bonner County Commissioner, 1st District (Ind.) I am an independent candidate for county commissioner. Independent means I will represent every person in Bonner County, Republican or Democrat, Conservative or Liberal, and everyone in between. My opponent belongs to a party that expects loyalty to the party in all decisions. She will be considering the party’s directives at every turn. As an independent commissioner I will not be bound by that restriction.

I have a variety of experiences that make it possible for me to understand and relate to a wide cross-section of people. My opponent has been a paid politician for the past twelve years.

I was raised on the family farm with my three brothers here in Bonner County.

I know and love the “Country Life” and am committed to respecting and honoring our rural character. That includes a strong commitment to private property rights, 4H and the Fair. I have been the steward for the family farm since 1980, building our log home, maintaining the forest with selective logging and replanting, raising hay, and taking care of our cattle and horses.

I am a homebuilder. I have built and remodeled a number of homes, including my own. I have a deep respect for the “construction trades” and have witnessed firsthand the hard work and skill these workers possess. I have worked with loggers and foresters and seen up close their ability to harvest trees in an environmentally safe and sustainable manner.

I am an educator. I have worked with children grades 1 through 12, in public elementary schools for 21 years, public high school for 12 years, and a private residential school for two years. I have been blessed with a quality education beginning at Southside Elementary in Cocolalla, continuing with Sandpoint High (class of ‘68), and the University of Idaho. Education is the key to building communities and improving opportunities.

In summary, I am an independent candidate who will represent all the people of Bonner County (not just one political party). I will make decisions after considering everyone’s input.

I will behave in a respectful and honorable way so that county employees, other elected officials, and the public all know they are valued and held in high regard.

Lewis Rich

Running for Bonner County Commissioner, 3rd District (Rep.) I had no intentions of doing a write-in campaign after the primary election. It is absolutely not a sour grapes nor knee jerk thing. I did have, immediately after the primary, many requests to run as a write-in candidate by many constituents. I delayed my decision for several months after the May election. One of my deciding factors was that my opponent never contacted me after the primary. Other than my concession phone call to Mr. Kelly, he had never talked to me until after my write-in announcement at the August Republican Central Committee. He has been seen in Mr Nielsen’s office many times, often with the

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door shut, on a weekly basis. Draw your own conclusions.

I think anyone who has been following Bonner County business meetings and/or attending them sees the many examples of dictatorial leadership displayed by Commissioner Nielsen. The contentious atmosphere Mr Kelly eluded to in his campaign is definitely not of my making, but Commissioner Nielsen’s! I have the utmost respect for both Marie Scott and Cheryl Piehl and always will.

If you want a Commissioner who is fair, consistent, and without bias, I believe I’m your best choice. I earned my way as a small businessman in Bonner County and have experienced Bonner County economics first hand for over 27 years.

Knowing that every decision I make has possible ramifications to the working classes and tax payers in our area, and not having a huge pension to live on, means better decisions will be made by myself. I have no ties to law enforcement, the military or any large retired group who haven’t had to earn any of their comfortable retirements here in North Idaho, or even in the state of Idaho.

I believe I have earned your trust and will continue to do so. Write me in on November 6 and I will continue as Your Commissioner.

Cary Kelly

Running for Bonner County Commissioner, 3rd District (Rep.) My opponent in the general election is the incumbent I defeated in the primary election, who is now running as a writein candidate. The discord in county government, which existed last May, has only gotten worse in recent months.

It is unproductive, time consuming, unnecessary, and has the potential to become very expensive. It has led to a breakdown of communications and coordination, as well as creating an unhealthy work environment and low morale. My opponent has been unable to work together with the other elected officials to bring about reconciliation.

In my opinion, this is a leadership issue. The first task is to build consensus for common goals—for example, to provide better service to the county. To start this process, I would have a one-onone meeting with each elected official to discuss his/her statutory requirements, near term and long-range goals, and what obstacles are ahead. Most importantly, I would ask each one what I could do as commissioner to assist in attaining those goals. I would assure them that they are essential, appreciated, and have my full support. It will take time to build up trust and credibility by my actions and decisions, but it will happen.

October 2012| The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page 12

Boots: Keeping ‘em Laughing

Scott Hancock

I grew up in southeastern but asked, “Did you The Reynolds have a neighbor, Barb Idaho, surrounded by cowboys, pay it back?” (such an appropriate name), who helps Indians, mutton conductors, “I sure did, Howard. and hinders the progress of all and is one goat ropers, artists, railroaders, No one else would give me of three women who intimidate me (more Mormons, hippies and farmers. the money. If you hadn’t, counseling). When I speak they take any The worst of the bunch, by far, me and the missus would tiny slip up and nail me with stinging were the cowboys. When Waylon have had to move on.” zingers that wither my manhood! Ms. Jennings and Willie Nelson sang Point made, Howard’s fault!

Gannon of this publication is one and lastly that cowboys like “smoky old After seeing each other the new “Queen of Sting”, C.S., is worse yet pool rooms and clear mountain at horse events, draft horse and you can take that to the bank. Barb and mornings, little warm puppies, pulls, fairs, and Western Gannon protect Boots like he’s a national and children and girls of the regalia shows, Boots finally treasure, perhaps thinking Laura Bush will night,” they damned sure got walked up to me like he send them a recipe, as she did for the book it right. was going to take a scalp “Boots n’ Beans.”

Boots Reynolds is not only an old and asked, “What crippled A few years ago Boots and his wife cowboy, he’s from Oklahoma—the worst you up and put you in the chariot, horse?” showed up at a breakfast eatery where we kind! As such he qualifies for the cow pen He’d been parading around the fairgrounds were eating. They sat down about fifteen philosophers’ warning: “Approach with in his custom-made Tenny-Lamas boots feet away and, not wanting to hurt Becky, care.” The average person can’t handle (cowboy tops, tennis shoe bottoms), I stroked up a conversation. Boots often true cowboys and, most especially, their made for him and other high “pollutin” hires a carpenter who has worked for me. heart for honesty, truth and the American characters like Willie Nelson by the Tony This carpenter is a good and a quiet man West and its values. Along with, I like to Lama boot company. Show off! I answered who has tried to teach Boots not to use add, a wonderful sense of humor based in both questions, and he just walked away.

20-penny barn nails to install window trim. the simplicity of man’s failings, reaching That’s a cowboy.

This carpenter we’ll call “Rich” to protect for the stars but coming up with a Meadow Oh, sure, Boots has a modicum of the innocent.

Muffin. fame. The cartoon illustrations in Pat While this “Rich” was working for Cowboys never figure out a lot of McManus’s books, the dozens of ‘cowboy Boots he had an accident involving a digit. things, one of them being women. If a slant’ greeting cards for Leanin’ Tree (to Nothing new here. So I, being a genteel woman doesn’t smack them up side of the the disgust of God fearin’ folks, the women soul, said to Boots across the room, “Ever head, they’ll never figure out she’s even on these cards are always overly endowed get all of Rich’s finger cleaned up?” He yells interested. From then on it’s pretty much and under dressed), the National Cowboy back that he still finds pieces and bits every all down hill. They are half house broke, Cartoonist credentials, the many years of time he moves a book or paint bucket in with bad table and public event manners, Western Horseman cartoons and much more. his studio. At this point some folks started and should only be trusted around So what! carrying their plates into the other room. livestock. Nevertheless, I’ve learned my He can be hurtful. Some years ago a What the hell? best bad habits from cowboys! lad named Corey was standing in line for I looked at my wife (also up for Boots has had a long and nefarious Boots to autograph his copy of “Boots sainthood) and she pointed out that our career in North Idaho and it’s all Howard n’ Beans,” a coffee table book he wrote conversation may have been the problem.

Faux’s fault. Howard is the epitome of a with recipes and cartoons. (Published Huh? Then the waitress confirmed my retired country squire: a dapper gentleman locally by Keokee Books. You can buy it at wife’s fears. To this day Boots blames me of an age, retired banker, God-fearing SandpointGeneralStore.com.) When the lad for the incident. At our last meeting at the family man with a wonderful, full-time finally got the book in for signing, Corey Big Horn Show we decided we couldn’t see Cheshire cat smile. As kind as can be, he chimed in, “I work for Scott Hancock.” the harm. It was the truth! is always interested in your well -being.

Without looking up, Boots retorted, “I’m I close with something Boots would But it’s Howard who gave us the scourge sorry.” I had to get counseling over that like. My young friend Juline said recently of Boots’ half-true stories, cartoons that one.

“When people ask how you are, you would make a sailor blush, fish and other Some folks think Boots is really clever should say, ‘I’m on a roll,’ and then add, smelly stories, greeting cards, books, and and that nothing throws him off. Once, our ‘Remember, I’ve been pushed around all documentary interviews that have wasted friend Pearl went up behind him while he my life.’” enough paper and celluloid to make the was otherwise engaged and asked why he Boots, keep em’ laughing! Because you “greenies” fall over with apoplexy. And was harassing people. Without missing a know the difference between a Claybank for that, Howard, I fear you shall be held beat he turned around and said, “Didn’t I and Grulla and that I rode the short bus eternally accountable. tell you to stay in the car with the kids?” to school, too. Do I know Boots well? No. Let me explain. A few years back I Where are the feminists when you need But, as the Masai say, “I know him well found myself sitting in the Clark Fork them? For those uninformed, Boots’ wife enough.” Friend, I say to you, “Powder High School lunch room eating next to Becky is slated for sainthood.

River, let er’ buck.”

Boots. Here’s where it gets hard to believe.

I, along with Boots, was there for Career Day! Howard and some other respectable folks were across the table from us (some had real careers). Boots asked Howard if he remembered lending him some money Oct. 20 • 6 pm • Clark Fork Filling Station • $12 years back for a special project he had been call 208.304.5447 or visit FriendsofJennifer on Facebook for more info given. Howard said he didn’t remember, October 2012| The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page 13

Benefit Dinner and Auction in support of Jennifer Price Pollard

Ant and the Grasshopper A Look at “Preppers”

Ancient tales stay with us for a reason: because they continue to be relevant over centuries of social, political and technological change. Aesop wrote “The Ant and the Grasshopper” and other well-known fables around 500-600 BCE, but the underlying wisdom in his works is still useful in today’s world. A closer examination of the story reveals more subtle insights, and so this classic tale of daily life makes me pause to examine our own behaviors and motivations in these turbulent times.

Let’s jump right to the story. In my condensed version, the Grasshopper hangs out all summer singing and having fun while the self-motivated Ant works tirelessly in the heat of the day to store food for the coming winter season. The Grasshopper sees the Ant as a boring creature in a dull existence, while the Ant perceives the Grasshopper as a foolish, self-absorbed freeloader. When winter finally arrives, the Grasshopper’s life is in peril with no established home and no food reserves. The Ant admonishes the freezing Grasshopper for his laziness and advises him to dance for warmth, but doesn’t offer to share food or lodging.

Like all of Aesop’s fables, it’s easy to find parallels in daily life because he wrote them for that very purpose.

Making reasonable preparations for an anticipated future is generally a good idea, especially if that future event can be predicted with some accuracy, such as the coming of the winter season, or retirement. It’s when the future is not so well known that the Grasshopper and the Ant have a valid reason to sit down over tea and debate the topic with credible arguments from both perspectives.

If winter did not arrive, for example, the Grasshopper would be the hero of the story, with the Ant’s obsessivecompulsive behavior as a lesson to enjoy life while you can, instead of mindlessly hoarding wealth and resources. Therein lies the crux of the matter: will winter come or not?

In today’s America, a growing number of people are sufficiently disturbed by their perception of current events to begin thinking like Ants. Not the sort who are preparing for winter, but who are preparing for something like an unscheduled Ice Age. The main body of this group is generally referred to as Preppers, and most of them apparently accept that designation without argument. The basic concept seems to be

that there is a swiftly approaching event of near-catastrophic proportions, which may manifest itself as social, political, or economic disintegration. Preppers’ worries often include predictions of war, civil war, famine, plague, solar flares, asteroid collisions, nuclear holocaust, and a host of other unpleasant Apocalyptic scenarios.

A growing number of people are sufficiently frightened by an uncertain future to have generated a very real social movement in this country that grabs significant media attention, and private enterprise has moved swiftly to establish a retail market to support their needs.

Like ants, Preppers come in many varieties. There are Army Ants who hoard guns and ammunition, preparing to face a violent future of anarchy. Some of these ants are quite ready to profess their intention to take whatever they need by force, particularly from the foolish peaceful ants who prepare for the future by storing food and supplies. There are Carpenter Ants who put much effort and resources into building homes and infrastructure designed to withstand the future they anticipate. Sugar Ants store food and household items in enormous supply, for use in a future of famine. There are even Rancher Ants who keep farm animals, like the way some ants keep herds of aphids in your garden.

When nature exerts pressure on a species, mutations are likely to develop. In this case, there is a variety of Prepper that foresees some form of Apocalyptic future and is very vocal about the need to prepare for the coming catastrophe, but takes little, if any, actual action. These folks tend to be very visible on Internet blogs and social media, but ironically, it seems most of them don’t really do anything potentially useful toward surviving the expected cataclysm, aside from perhaps hoarding precious metals and weapons.

What does all this say about Preppers?

The first thing that comes to mind is that lumping them all together is doing a disservice to each of the factions. Of course, it is always a danger to make generalizations about a group, because closer examination reveals the existence of discreet sub-groups that may have very different viewpoints. My second observation is the entire movement is based on a lot of speculation of future events that may or may not happen in our lifetime. That in itself is fairly amazing

Don Clark when you consider it.

History has plenty of perspective to offer us regarding change. There are abundant examples of sweeping changes that affected entire cultures, changes that progressed rather suddenly from a historical viewpoint. Wars, political and/or social upheaval, local and temporary climate changes, religious infiltration and persecution, and other events that radically changed the life of the common citizen are all part of our known history. These changes are certain to continue happening as the future unfolds. There are cultures in the world in the midst of radical change at this very moment, and it would be unwise to suppose it can’t happen here. But if we’re to trust historical records to any degree, apocalypses are notably rare, though predictions of doom are not.

Most of us have a memory of the Y2K scare, when the modern world was supposed to come grinding to a halt literally overnight, suddenly dropping us into a pre-industrial age. Within my lifetime, I recall predictions of asteroid collisions, massive worldwide earthquakes, scorching solar flares, Nuclear Armageddon, Peak Oil, and Alien Invasion, among others. That these events did not happen doesn’t mean they couldn’t, nor does it mean they will. There has never been a shortage of Prophets, Oracles, and others who interpret events with a foreshadowing of doom, but generally they have a poor track record for accuracy.

So with no truly useful answers, what are we to do?

As with many things, we can probably gather wisdom from both the Ant and the Grasshopper. Being reasonably prepared for the future is likely to be a good thing, regardless if you anticipate a doomsday-level event or not. But we shouldn’t lose sight of the joy of being a Grasshopper who relishes life in the moment, singing, dancing and spreading joy to others. Fixation on a grim future is just as unhealthy as a blind assumption that conditions will always be prosperous and without difficult challenges. My suggestion is to prepare for the future by enriching your health, personality and skills, being kind to your world and the living beings that share it with you, and above all staying happy and positive in spirit. These things will make us all winners, regardless of what the future brings.

Don Clark owns Voodoo Solar on McGhee Road in Kootenai. Reach him at don@ VoodooSolar.com.

Page 14 | The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| October 2012

A Bird in Hand Michael Turnlund

This bird’s the bane of bird-feeders everywhere!

One might think that the backyard bird feeder is the songbird version of utopia: an endless supply of food, plenty of good company, great conversation, and the ideal place to take a date, or maybe find that feathered special someone. Assuming the absence of a house cat, life could not get much better. Wrong!

It’s not just songbirds that find a meal at those backyard feeders, but also predators.

Think of a watering hole in the Plains of Kilimanjaro, replacing the lions with small hawks. Let me introduce you to the bane of bird feeders everywhere, the Sharpshinned Hawk.

I remember just a few weeks back watching the feathered mob enjoying my largess at my own backyard bird feeder when suddenly, poof!... all the little songbirds disappeared. “What’s up with that?” I wondered. I soon found my answer, for circling up above was a beautiful little Sharp-shinned Hawk, or Sharpie as they are otherwise known. He was also visiting my back yard, but not for the bird seed I had dispensed. Rather, he was hunting for the birds that were attracted to that feeder. You see, the preypredator pyramid is also in force in my neighborhood and at the top of that food chain is the Sharpie, our smallest hawk.

Sharpies feed almost exclusively on birds, which form over 90 percent of its diet. Most birders will rarely get more than a flash of these quick little hunters, as they twist through the trees in pursuit of their prey. They are especially equipped with long tails and short wings for highspeed maneuvering, as the little birds they hunt do not give up without a flight. I have received many emails and comments from birders with complaints about these disruptive little raptors raiding backyard feeders and making a general nuisance increase nutrients, suchPygmy as nitrogen and of themselves (Northern Owls are also culprits, but that’s another story). For pilot project being me,This I findseptic them beautiful and I amisglad to sacrifice a chickadee or comply two to have introduced in order to withthem water visit mystandards backyard. Hey, I’ll even open quality as determined byupthe an all-you-can-eat buffet if those Sharpies Federal Clean Water Act. Designated to will focus on the House Sparrows. protect water quality, the plan, known as Sharpies are pretty little things, about a Daily for Lake the“Total size ofMaximum a small jay.

TheyLoad” are distinctly Pend Oreille, addresses nutrient issues colored with bluish-gray backs and wing primaries, a matching black hood, and a In addition, many lakeshore buff-colored breast with reddish-brown horizontal ribbing.

Their outstretched homeowners participated in a survey wings willconcerning show a dark a linear pattern in 2007 variety of water against aissues. white background.

Andout, theirtheir quality As is turns eyes are downright eerie: solid red orbs

Sharp-Shinned Hawk with black centers. They truly look unnatural, but natural they are. And the long, stripped tail of alternating grey and black bands is unmistakable. As is true with all raptors, the female is larger— sometimes much larger—than the male.

Sharpies have long, pencil-like legs that do not seem up to the task of being the terror of the lilac bushes. But they are.

Indeed, the name of these birds comes from the rough, scale-like skin that covers the legs.

The above description also fits the next-size-larger Coopers Hawk. The Coopers Hawk is easily mistaken for the Sharpie and vice versa, their apparent difference of size. all, But don’t And they being don’t only haveone to—after there are field marks you can use to we Americans believe if it’s ours, it’s ours differentiate between these two related, and we can do with it what we want? Or but different, species. When soaring or circling above, the silhouette of the is and“T”—their we want it,small then Sharpie looks like a flying you have to give it to us and if you don’t, head is not always obvious. In comparison, then you sponsor terrorism the Coopers Hawk’s head can be and morewe’ll readily discerned. Additionally, the end Bytail theofway, China wants that oil as of the the perched Sharpie is blunt, well. Remember China?

The people who whereas that of the more barrel-chested loaned isusrounded. all thatThis money?

Coopers mightChina’s be toughoil around 6.5 billion but barrels toconsumption see without isa pair of binoculars, still a year, and growing at 7 percent important to is note.

Otherwise, size canevery be difficult judge inabout the field, especially year. It to produces 3.6 billion barrels knowing thatDoes a large, Sharpie every year. thisfemale math look good to might match a small male Coopers anyone?

Can anyone other thanfrom Sarah head to tail tip.

The Coopers will Palin and George Bush believealso weswap can the for of a cap. drilldark our hood way out this problem? Anyone Come on, it’s a bird eat bird out who doesn’t think we better hit world the ground there, even your rose andwe running to among figure out how to bushes fuel what camellias.

Danger from the fencethan want fueled withlurks something other rails to the apple trees.

And that friendly oil probably deserves to go back to an little Sharpie is not there so you can add a check to your life list, but to invite some : I could go on unfortunate songbird home for dinner. forever, but you’ll quit reading. So one final Just remember that, for all of its beauty, discussion the American public. First, nature playsfor hardball.

Happy birding! let’s have a true, independent analysis of You can reach Mike theturnlunds@gmail. what happened on at September 11, 2001. com.

The official explanation simply doesn’t Council website at tristatecouncil.org. hold water. This is one of those “who knew what, when” questions that must be answered—and people/institutions must

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October 2012|| The River Journal - A News Magazine Through | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page 15 rth Wading Through www.RiverJournal.com | Vol 17 No.Worth 18 | Wading November 2008| |www.RiverJournal.com Page 5

The Game Trail Matt Haag

Archery season was a real hoot this year! As I write this there are three days left in the season and the majority of archers I have talked to had a really fun season whether they killed their elk or not. The bulls have been screaming and really active during daylight; however, they are less likely to come charging into a bugle or cow call. Have patience when calling, they are hanging up and a little more weary with the wolves around. I have seen some very nice bulls taken this year, but heck, every archery bull is a nice bull! Just a quick reminder that unless you have a controlled hunt tag, all of cow season is closed.

This time every year we get calls from the public with concerns about violations and people who aren’t following the rules. We could not do our jobs without public support so please take the time to make the call and report violations.

You can always call the Citizens Against Poaching hotline at 800-632-5999, your local sheriff’s office, or your local conservation officer directly. You can remain anonymous.

Lately we have been receiving calls reporting ATVs on closed roads during the hunting season. To confirm those calls we have been seeing a number of ATV violations while out on patrol, some of them minor, some of them scary, and some just plain flagrant. Ask any

On Elk and ATVs

Conservation Officer about the ATV accidents they have come upon, and you will understand why we enforce those laws. What really disturbs me are the adults who subject children to their stupid decisions on an ATV. I never have been a big fan of laws that protect you from yourself, but after seeing one too many ATV accidents involving children, I feel pretty strongly about these laws. If you want to damage yourself on an ATV so be it, but please don’t put your children in danger.

It’s very frustrating for IDFG officers when it comes to enforcing ATV laws; we as an agency are not involved in making laws nor are we paid to enforce them.

Believe it or not, your local Sheriff’s office and the Forest Service are responsible for these enforcement efforts, but typically we are the most involved agency.

With that being said, I will remind our riders of the laws that we will be enforcing.

You need to have a valid driver’s license to operate an ATV and you must have a motorcycle endorsement to ride a motorcycle unless you are under 16 years of age—then you must complete an OHV safety course approved by Idaho Department of Parks & Rec and the under-aged rider must be accompanied by a licensed rider (must be within 300 feet of rider). The ATV or motorcycle must be licensed and display an OHV registration sticker from the owner’s state of

residence. In addition, just like your car, you must have Proof of Liability on you. If you are a licensed rider under the age of 18 you must wear a helmet. During MAY 10—OCTOBER 20 you must have a shovel 24 inches long and 6 inches wide and a water container capable of holding 1 gallon of water (helmets qualify) with you at all times.

Also, check to make sure the road or trail you plan to ride on is open to motorized vehicles. It’s closed for a reason, whether you agree with it or not, so respect that closure. It puts a black eye on all those who ride when one group decides that the rules don’t apply to them.

Police your own ranks, follow the rules, and ride with some common sense.

October 10 marks the opener for general weapon elk and deer, so be sure to pick up a copy of the regulations and read through the dates and laws. Another easy way to obtain the regulations is to visit our website at http://fishandgame.idaho. gov and click on the regulations tab and print the pages you need.

Also there has been some confusion on the waterfowl opener date. We are now in Zone 2 and the season doesn’t open unit October 13. Just another reason to get a copy of the regulations.

See you out there, have fun, and be safe. And be true sportsmen – protect for the future! Leave no child inside.

You can reach Matt at matt.haag@idfg.gov. or call at 208-946-0671.

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Page 16 | The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| October 2012

The Hawk’s Nest Ernie Hawks

From a notch above Little Seneca Lake on the Highline trail I scanned across Island Lake to the glacial-polished, granite ridge on the other side. Beyond were numerous peaks reaching heights of over thirteen thousand feet creating the Continental Divide and a cirque that held Titcomb Basin—our goal for the day.

It was our third day in the Wind River Range. The Basin had drawn us to west central Wyoming and “The Winds,” as the locals call them.

Now, after weeks of planning and several days of acclimating to the altitude, we could only see an outline of the towers. Smoke from wild fires to the west screened the details and filtered the view of the sculpted cliffs.

There was some grousing among us about the haze. However, we also had heard of the storms that blow in the Winds, that can make a trek like ours above the tree line look as flat as Kansas.

At least we could see mountains in the cloud and we were appreciative.

From this vantage point in the notch we still could not see into the carved bowl. It would be another four miles around Island Lake and the ridges to reach that famous destination. However, this overlook could have been an excellent destination in itself.

There had been other panoramas along the way and each time I was struck by our differing reactions to the same sights.

Each of us had seen dramatic landscapes. John has scaled the mountains of Switzerland, New Zealand and others around the world. Andrew has climbed in the Himalayas, Alaska and all over the U.S. and Canada. I have hiked above and below the glaciers of

Hiking in The Winds the Canadian Rockies and the ranges in the Northwest. The three of us each have history, yet when each of us arrives at a new vista we are first-timers.

I know part of our disappointment with the pollution from the fires was the desire to see the subtleties of the cliffs and gorges. The challenge of a good trek is always part of a journey like this, yet it is the sights that motivate the expedition.

The poor visibility did not keep us from following the rocky trail into the canyon, skirting the lake and climbing up around the ridges. Still, we hoped the winds this range is famous for would come and blow the smoke away. The trail is well defined but difficult due to rocks— it is impossible to set a rhythm. So with a cadence of trip, slip, sidestep, high step, ankle roll we made slow progress.

Around us was mostly scarred granite with barely enough soil for short vegetation. We marveled at the fact that anything could grow at all, but green was almost as prominent as sarsen on the landscape. On both sides of the trail glacial scratches marred the otherwise smooth roundness of the valley floors.

The track traversed a slope onto a moraine. There at 10,800 feet we got our first views into Titcomb Basin and its lakes. Titcomb Lakes are a series of small, shallow tarns. Some flow from one to the other over very gentle cascades, nearly as wide as the ponds they separate.

The drop, only a couple feet, falls into a lower clear, azure-blue mere. Narrow streams flow into small ravines, through gracefully rounded base rocks that connect them to other pools in the chain.

Erratics, some as big as trucks, left from the melting glaciers, were scattered about like toys on the floor of a child’s

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We became quiet as we tried to comprehend the magnitude of the cirque and all that it held.

John’s wonder of the harsh beauty reminded me of my granddaughter as she discovers each new flower or blade of grass in our woods. Dropping his pack, and with camera in hand, he shot from every perspective all the while savoring, marveling at it all. It looked to me like he wanted to keep it or, at least, reach out and touch it.

Andrew, more analytical, studied each crag, each hanging valley, each pass between the crests of the stark face soaring over three thousand feet above us. Map in hand he compared the topography to the paper in his lap, all while looking for possible routes to make an ascent.

I stood, hopefully unobtrusively, focusing in each direction, looking, raising and lowering my scrutiny, trying to turn something indescribable into words.

The cliffs climbed up from the floor, smooth at first where the glacier had burnished them. Their surfaces became courser as they ascended above the ice flow, the tops left as ragged, irregular pinnacles of stone piercing into bright blue sky. I felt I was in The Great Cathedral and didn’t want to foul it, by sight or sound, in any way.

Each of us in our own way was trying to absorb the entire scene lying before us. Three different approaches and three different experiences of the same place but all with a reverence the Spirit of the Mountains deserves—in fact commands— at a place like this.

Rugged, pristine beauty surrounded us as we gazed in awe. Then, we all noticed, at about the same time, the smoke had lifted. The early morning concerns about not being able to fully experience the scale and scope of the basin had been taken by the winds of The Winds. It felt as if a divine gift had been unnoticeably given to us while we had been marching, with attention to passage, into this glorious place.

That is when we reacted the same— with amazing thankfulness at this extraordinary and humbling reward.

Reach Ernie at michalhawks@gmail.com, and check out his photos at www.PhotosbyHawks. net

October 2012| The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page 17

Valley of Shadows The Neighborhood Vampire?

The

“... And all the houses shut against a cool wind... the town full of cold sunlight... then suddenly, the day was gone. Night came out from under each tree and spread. The wind outside nested in each tree, prowled the sidewalks on invisible treads like unseen cats...”

The Halloween Tree, Ray Bradbury This segment concerns an obscure neighborhood story. It involves back fence gossiping, a wonderful thing.

It frequently, if ever, loses little in the telling and usually picks up much embellishment along the way.

Seems that over a two-and-a-half-week period in the late 50s, a neighborhood tale was floating around at the time, that a newlywed couple had moved into the area.

The husband apparently worked nights at the Hedlund Mill (before it was purchased

by Louisiana Pacific), on Boyer across from the Lincoln School.

Now grocery shopping was more decentralized sixty years ago. There was no Bonner Mall nor Yokes. That area where WalMart is now was all trees and meadows. It was before “Roger’s Thrift Store,” which is where Winter Ridge is now located, and even before Harold Marley built IGA on 5th and Church for the first time.

Safeway was on the corner of Alder and Second, which is now medical offices.

The aras where the current Safeway and Sandpoint Super Drug are located was residential houses. M&J built and moved into the current Super Drug, but it was originally on the corner of Boyer and Larch, across from the current Super

Lawrence Fury

One parking lot. Later, it became Keg’s Mexican Chow House, as related in my first “Valley” story, “The Jones House.”

Neighborhood groceries such as The Ella Avenue Grocery, and Main Street Grocery (now Common Knowledge Bookstore) were the norm.

Why the history lesson? Stage setting.

It was most likely the old M&J that the young woman of our story would patronize. It seems that one of the older neighborhood ladies was waiting behind this young woman at the checkout counter when the cashier noticed the young woman looked very pale, and asked if she were all right.

The clerk, our source noticed, had glanced at the young woman’s neck several times, but tactfully remained silent. There was what appeared to be a heck of an oval, bloody bruise—a classic hickey. (No, not two puncture wounds.)

Over the course of the rest of the summer and into the fall, others in the neighborhood mentioned they had seen the young woman and that she still carried what they first interpreted to be the result of frisky marriage relations. But either the wound wouldn’t heal, or her husband was an uncaring beast with little regard for his wife.

One of the neighbors eventually introduced herself to the young woman and asked if she would mind having company one afternoon as a welcometo-the-neighborhood thing. The young woman at first brightened and accepted, but then quickly declined, stating she didn’t want to disturb her day-sleeping

husband.

During this time period several dogs had gone missing, especially the ones that would bark at the slightest provocation.

Some of the area residents reported seeing what they thought may have been a prowler, though nothing ever seemed to be missing.

Then, not long before Thanksgiving, the young lady stopped appearing in the store. It was assumed that she and her huband had moved.

Being naturally curious (to use one word for it), a couple of the neighbor ladies decided to call on the young woman to make sure she was all right.

The house they assumed was hers was vacant, locked tight, a realty sign in the yard. They later discovered through the gossip grapevine that a neighbor had seen what seemed to be the pair loading a station wagon late at night, and the house had been vacant since. No one on the block could recall having seen anyone there except the young woman. No husband, no visitors... no one, ever.

Most likely, the ocuple moved, in the middle of the night, perhaps to avoid paying the rent. At least, that’s the sensible version that circulated, but one of our older neighbor ladies had other ideas.

Happy Halloween Author’s note: I’ve been asked about this column and told that it appears more a series of accounts, not a story. Well, that’s the nature of true stories. They’re incidents with no beginning, no ending, just as they are with no explanation.

Lawrence lives within the Valley of Shadows, and is a collector of its strange tales. Contact him at larry_fury@yahoo.com

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Why Surrealism Matters

Jody Forest

Younger readers, avert your eyes from this month’s column; imagine yourself as the head goose in a large V-shape of your fellows lazily heading south. Your beaked nostrils flare at the faint scent ahead of turbulence, of doubt and darkness, and you make a discreet turn away from the unknown danger and lead your younger, more inexperienced fellows towards sunshine and safety. Just so, this column should warn you of storm clouds roiling and gathering herein. Your fellow younger geese should follow your posterior into the sunshine of salvation and eternal bliss.

Oh, but if your nerves are made of steel, and fire from heaven you would steal: read on!

In the summer of ‘69, nothing made sense, not to me, and apparently not to the world at large. I’d just returned from two and a half hallucinogenic years of madness in Vietnam and enrolled on the GI Bill in college while trying to piece together my shattered ego, but as I said, nothing made sense. A series of strange free plays at school struck a chord, politically: Jarry’s scathing Ubu Roi from the 1890’s, where Pere Ubu, like then Richard Nixon was a venal, crass power-mad politico. The Firesign Theater’s “Don’t Crush that Dwarf, Hand me the Pliers!” led me to examine their sources, the font behind these brief moments of clarity. Oh, and what wonders I found! Molly Bloom’s soliloquy from Ulysses to the “unholy trinity” of the fathers of surrealism, Baudelaire, Rimbaud and Lautreamont. From these three you could stretch back further into the wild, turbulent roots of Poe, DeSade, and the horrific Old Testament tales of a vengeful, blood-drenched deity.

Man’s entire history seemed a bizarro world of depraved emperors, sadistic

Popes, religious wars of intolerance and vendettas and cruel oriental vices par excellence.

Lautreamont, though, was my guide and pole star. That fortuitous meeting on a dissecting table of a sewing machine and an umbrella. Imaginary tales blossomed forth in my brain of a real Rimbaud and Lautreamont meeting at the barricades of the Communard (they were both known to have battled on the ramparts, Lautreamont dying shortly thereafter and the teenage Rimbaud forsaking poetry forever and fleeing to Africa as a gunrunner) colliding with visionary idylls of Orwell’s Homages to Catalonia, to the Dada uprisings which led to the final orgasms of organized surrealism in the 1930s. From there a fervent underground grew, to the beatniks of the 50s, the hopeful Yage and psylocibn prose/poems of Ginsberg, Kerouac, Kesey, et al to Lennon’s Utopian Imagine, Lucy in the Sky and yes, back to the Firesign Theater again where I began working as a roadie and writing of my own first brief excursions into the looking glass world. Oh, and it’s a wondrous land of beauty, of never-ending delights of discovery.

Scratch the writings of the bizarre Raymond Roussel (or almost any surrealist) and you’ll find someone who’s said (or felt), “I feel a burning sensation at my brow, I once felt there was such a star at my brow and I can never forget it.” Back again to Jarry’s Ubu Roi; it was the opening of this play, in 1890, followed by wild riots, that caused the poet and audience member W.B. Yeats to write sadly, if prophetically, “After us, the Savage God!” He could as easily have flashed forward to the riotous opening night of Bunuel/Dali’s 1928 “The Andalusian Dog,” a mysterious box strapped to the chest of a somnabulist

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bicycler, ants crawl out of the palm of his hand, six cassocked priests pull a piano by ropes across a sitting room, on top of which is a dead, rotting horse covered with buzzing flies. Flash again to the Soundtrack of the Damned; Jim Morrison’s ode to the Oedipus complex, The End; The Jefferson Airplane’s ode to the Alice books, White Rabbit; Pink Floyd’s early hymn to Ego disintegration, “Set the Controls for the Heart of the Sun.” I began to realize and accept Jung’s concept of the animus and the anima, that we all hold within us a dark side and that to hold it secret and repressed leads only to neurosis and alienation from the marvelous world around us, which will not be silenced! Lovecraft’s Elder Gods, who “bubbled, boiling and blaspheming in nuclear chaos,” was a leavening counterpoint to that marvelous, calm world of the beyond/within.

Humor, like The Firesign Theater, is another such counterpoint to the often serious, often deadly world about us. Recently, intruding into the world of politics for instance, a group of young surrealists, angered by then candidate Rick Santorum’s equation of homosexuality with bestiality, simply began, after an online voting campaign, using the name Santorum as a euphemism for the aftereffects of anal sex. It’s now a commonplace, mainstream definition, as any Google search will confirm, but its importance to me is simply proof of another surprise visitation from the dark/surreal side into the otherwise fixed, immobile reality of a bewildered Mr. Santorum and his followers.

Like UFOs, Bigfoot or lake monsters, the dark and surreal side of our selves will always surface and intrude whenever it’s ignored or marginalized. In the 1930s an early group of young surrealists opened a storefront in Paris, the Surrealist Research Bureau, in which passers-by were encouraged to come in and write down their dreams, their visions, their Ouija board contacts with the dead. I sometimes hope, in some small way, my own Surrealist Research Bureau will also encourage such visits to and from the “other side.” Beauty will be Convulsive or it will not be at All! Finally, I recently learned of the passing of The Firesign Theater’s Peter Bergman after a brief illness. This one’s for you, Pete! More Sugar and Happy Trails! ‘til next time, Keep spreading the word: Soylent Green is People!

All Homage to Xena!

October 2012| The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page 19

A Seat in the House

Rep. George Eskridge

I discussed the three school propositions in the previous River Journal that will be on the November election ballot. In addition to these three propositions, there are also two Idaho constitutional amendments for the voters to consider election day.

Senate Joint Resolution 102 (SJR 102) proposes an “amendment to Section 5, Article X, of the state constitution that provides that the state board of correction shall have control, direction and management of felony probation and parole.”

Article X, Section 5 of the state constitution provides that the Board of Correction’s authority includes adult probation and parole, including not only those convicted of felonies but also those who have committed misdemeanors. The authority outlined in Article X, Section 5 was adopted by the legislature in 1942.

Since then the legislature has adopted statutes granting counties the authority

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to supervise misdemeanor probationers as well as their having authority to charge misdemeanor probationers a supervision fee.

The proposed constitutional amendment under Senate Joint Resolution 102 inserts the word “felony” before the word “probation” in Article X, Section 5 to clarify that the Board of Correction’s authority only applies to those who are on parole for a felony violation and defines the authority of counties to continue to supervise misdemeanor probation, as is the current practice.

House Joint Resolution 2 proposes an amendment to Article 1 of the Idaho Constitution by the addition of a New Section 23 preserving the right of the public to hunt, fish and trap in the state.

The meaning and purpose of the amendment as outlined in the Secretary of State’s campaign information is to: “provide that the rights to hunt, fish and trap are a valued part of Idaho’s heritage and would preserve these rights for the people of Idaho and (to) manage these rights through the laws of the state. This amendment specifies that hunting, fishing and trapping shall be a preferred means of managing wildlife. This amendment does not create a right to trespass or affect rights to divert or appropriate water. This amendment also will not prevent the suspension or revocation of licenses issued by the state for hunting, fishing or trapping.”

House Joint Resolution 2 (HJR2) was passed by the legislature because bans on certain types of hunting and trapping have been introduced and passed in other states by animal rights activists and other anti-hunting groups that have been successful in eroding sportsmen’s rights

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to hunt, fish and trap. This amendment would guarantee that these rights are guaranteed as an integral section of the Idaho State Constitution.

I supported both of these proposed changes in our state constitution; SJR 102 because it places in statute procedures already in practice and working well and HJR 2 because it provides more protection for a valued part of our heritage, i.e. the right to hunt, fish and trap, recognizing that public hunting, fishing and trapping is the preferred means of managing and controlling wildlife.

Election day is November 6, less than 38 days away at the time of writing this article, so be sure to put this date on your calendar and remember to vote! If you are a qualified voter and not yet registered, you can register with the County Clerk up to 25 days before Election Day. You can also register on the day of the election at your polling place by “completing a registration card, making an oath as prescribed by the Secretary of State and providing proof of residence.” You also must provide an authorized photo ID. A photo ID is now required to vote in Idaho, or in the absence of an acceptable photo ID, you can also meet Idaho’s requirement by signing a Personal Identification Affidavit.

Thanks for reading and as always please feel free to contact me with questions relating to this article or other issues important to you. I can by reached by phone at (208) 265-0123, by mail at P.O. Box 112, Dover, 83825 or by email at geskridge(at)coldreams.com REMEMBER TO VOTE NOVEMBER 6!

George George Eskridge, is the Idaho Representative for House District 1B

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October 2012| The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page 20

The Scenic Route

It’s Our Own Damned Fault

Sandy Compton

Molly Ivins is dead of a “screamin’ case of cancer,” as she put it, so now who’s going to raise Hell with our idiots in Washington, D.C.?

They are ours, by the way; we elected them. The idiots are not all Republicans or all Democrats, either, nor are they really idiots, but we haven’t won any intelligence contest for electing them and allowing them the power they wield in our lives and the lives of the world.

We’re the ones who accept what they say when they tell us they are working for the greater good and every indication says that they are working for their own.

There is so much Hell to raise, it’s hard to know where to start. But we gotta start or it will be the end. Of us. Of the U.S., in particular. I suppose one place to start is to start paying attention to—and honoring—our charter.

We have a magnificent mandate from the writers of the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution, the Bill of Rights and men like Washington, Lincoln and the Roosevelts. But, we have never lived up to it. That noble thought that “all men are created equal” has never been well served in our history. If you want to argue that, read about our treatment of Africans we kidnapped to provide cheap labor and Native populations our government practiced genocide on and ultimately imprisoned in a reservation system that exists today.

“Give us your huddled masses,” our great Lady in New York Harbor calls. The unstated end of that fine sentiment might read, “so they and their children can slave for nothing in our factories and mines.”

It wasn’t until 1938 that we passed laws preventing minor children from working 12-hour shifts in dangerous conditions to make our wealthiest, “leading” citizens more wealthy. Some of these “bastions of industry” fought reform all the way

because it cut into their well-lined pockets.

We still help petty, elitist, greedy and egomaniacal men and women gain the power of the Senate, House, Cabinet and presidency, but a nation’s leadership in a democratic society is indicative of what the electorate is like. By the leadership we manifest, it is apparent that we are selfcentered, complacent, apathetic, selfish, greedy and think we are entitled. As a group, we are those things, okay?

Not okay? Well, too bad. We are. We get mad, sometimes, but then we go home and turn on “Funniest Home Videos” to take our blues away, which, on the most part, ain’t really funny. Often, they are about someone suffering pain or embarrassment.

Who are we, anyway, to laugh at and exploit the misfortune of others for ten minutes of fame? (Even Andy Warhol’s currency is subject to inflation.)

Right now, our country is spending billions of dollars annually in an absolutely stupid (I am POUNDING on the keyboard) war in Iraq that turns 8-yearolds into combatants, thinking about spending billions more in an another absolutely stupid war with Iran, and we can’t even take care of our own children.

We are not providing them with health care, we are slashing education and cultural programs, and instead, sending 18-year-olds off to the Middle East to get their heads blown off.

We spend more on making foreign kids into terrorists than we do on taking care of our own children. One for instance is the State Children’s Health Insurance Program, SCHIP. This program is jointly financed by federal and state governments and administered by the states. It provides health care for children whose parents (or, more likely, parent) can’t pay the rent, buy food,

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clothe their kids and still afford $300 a month for health insurance. It’s been very successful, keeping kids healthy who might otherwise slip through the cracks, and now, the Feds are thinking of cutting it back. Ironically, a recent effort to bolster it was tied to an appropriations bill for the war in Iraq. What on God’s green earth is the matter with us?

I have an idea on the answer to that.

A number of years ago, I dabbled at reading “The Golden Bough,” by Sir James Frazier, a monstrous and completely British-centric anthropologic treatise on the nature of power in human relationships. He concluded early in the book that it was often those willing to lie and manipulate their fellows who rose to power. His conclusion stands well-proven.

Many of our leaders are self-serving sorts who tell us what they want us to believe in order to fill their own pockets and the pockets of their friends or to fulfill their own egos.

Why do they do this? Because they can, and because we let them. We’re the ones who put a check beside their names and sent them off to Washington, D.C.—or Boise—or Helena—or Olympia.

Whether we like to admit it or not, we need some serious reform in our world, and the only place we can start is in our own country. We need to start holding corporations liable for the damage, both human and ecological, that they do in their endeavors to enrich their stockholders, management and boards of directors. We need to figure out a way to make our government responsible to the governed. We need to fire some of the idiots. But, if we are going to do that, we need to realize that, in spite of what finger pointers and blamers like Rush and Michael Savage have to say, (and by the way, they are telling you what you want to hear to fill their own pockets, also) that it’s our own damned fault and we are the only ones who can do anything about our circumstances, but we will never be able to do so until we are willing to admit our mistakes, face our problems and failings and reform ourselves, too.

Molly might tell us that the first thing we need to do is stop being idiots ourselves.

Sandy Compton’s books are available on-line at bluecreekpress.com. This was written in March of 2007. With a few word changes, such as “Afghanistan” for “Iraq” and additions, such as “and Tea Partiers” after Michael Savage, it still works for me.

Life can be simple if we live it that way. SC

October 2012| The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page 21

Veterans’ News Gil Beyer

In last month’s article I mentioned that this month I would write about Gen. Petraeus’s “Letter to Veterans.” I’ve since found out the essay I read was not written by the General so I’m trying to get the correct source of this piece. Since this is my last opportunity before November 6 to address the importance of this election, I’ve re-arranged my priorities. The events of the past few weeks have contributed to this decision.

Today is the 11th anniversary of September, 11, 2001. In the 11 years since that horrendous event a great deal has happened.

On a global level we have fought three wars. One is over on paper and the other two are still ongoing. I still believe the Iraq war was a huge mistake and was fought based on a series of lies told to the American people and the world. But that’s my opinion—others disagree.

Our President has promised we’ll be out of Afghanistan by 2014 but the ‘War on Terror’ will continue until we win. I don’t believe that we can win the ‘War on Terror’ solely on a military basis.

The ‘War on Terror’ will have to be won through a combination of diplomacy and force of arms. Good luck with that in the near future.

One of the ‘unintended consequences’ of the “Arab Spring” was the murder of our US Ambassador to Libya. The Ambassador was a strong supporter of the Libyan people’s fight against Gaddafi during that country’s revolt. Recent information seems to indicate it wasn’t a ‘spontaneous demonstration’ precipitated by a poorly made video, but more likely an orchestrated assault by an Al Qaeda-like Libyan group designed to kill Americans—particularly the Ambassador.

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Veterans Need to Vote Their Interests The GOP’s response to this tragic event was predictable, totally inappropriate and truly sad. The GOP’s nominee to lead this nation vowed that this tragedy would “never have happened” during his presidency. My question would be, “How can you possibly make that guarantee?”

These are hollow words coming from a man who has never been called upon to stand in harm’s way. He, like his friend Dick Cheney, had better things to do.

What would he do to ensure this didn’t happen on his watch? We currently have terrorist groups in Iraq, Afghanistan, Yemen, Somali, Mali, Sudan, Libya, Pakistan and others that I can’t recall.

Are we to invade all of these countries?

We’ve been unable to end terrorist attacks in just one country for over a decade.

In fact, the attacks in Afghanistan have escalated in recent months. I don’t see the American people supporting a dozen new invasions.

Bluntly put, the less than 0.5 percent of Americans fighting these wars are getting tired of carrying a burden that 99 percent aren’t even completely aware exists. I find in disturbing the GOP leadership desires to spend tens of billions of dollars on defense spending but makes no mention of benefits for veterans after they have served. The Ryan budget makes no mention of services for veterans, yet allocates more to the Armed Services than they are even asking for. Also, how do we increase military funding without any revenue increase? The only possible way to even come close is to further cut domestic programs like Medicare, Medicaid and food stamps.

I simply can’t even imagine the GOP nominee in the Oval Office when the phone rings at 3 am. He has no domestic policies that aren’t drawn from Bush’s or Reagan’s failed ‘trickle down’ policies and no foreign policies that don’t require a large-scale military involvement.

Just when I thought Congress couldn’t do any more harm they proved me wrong! On September 19, most of the Republicans in the Senate voted against a bill that would have provided funds for communities to hire veterans as police, firemen and other public sector employees. The rationale used for blocking this bill? It would exceed spending limits that had been set when they were threatening a government shutdown. The GOP’s hubris and arrogance knows NO bounds. I cannot see any reason for any veteran to vote

for a representative who won’t support veterans.

I would suggest that to increase the speed of economic recovery we need to have a radical shuffle in the composition of the Congress. The Tea Party wave that swept into office in 2010 has repeatedly shown they have no interest in actual governance, nor any interest in actually representing those who elected them.

They have shown themselves to be more in thrall to an un-elected power broker than to their Congressional Districts.

We currently have 235 Congressmen and 41 Senators in the 112th Congress who are signatories of Grover Norquist’s “Taxpayer Protection Pledge.” I contend it is way past time for Americans to have representatives who are more responsive to the voters than to one un-elected ideologue. Their names can be found online at http://tinyurl.com/6ja7yot.

These people need to be called to task by voters this November. If they aren’t working for us, they are working against us. We need to ensure that ‘compromise’ is no longer a dirty word in the 113th Congress.

We have millions of unemployed Americans and tens of thousands of them are veterans of those wars we’ve fought over the past decade plus. We have a crumbling national infrastructure that Congress refuses to deal with in spite of the President’s many proposals. We need to work together to solve these problems.

Compromises must be made, and as long as one side of the aisle is totally intransigent, we will have a problem.

It is more important to vote in one’s own best interest this year than any other in recent memory. Get to know all the candidates on the ballot. Look at the above website and learn who is beholden to whom. Will they really represent your interests or those of others?

Thomas Jefferson said an informed electorate is essential for democracy to survive. If our Democracy is to flourish we need to diminish the dysfunctional disconnect within the legislative process.

All veterans—old and new—should take a very hard look at all the candidates and determine the ones who would best serve the interests of veterans. But the most important duty we have as veterans is to cast that vote. We have defended that right and we must exercise it.

Gil Beyer, ETC USN Ret., can be reached at vintage40@frontier.com

Page 22 | The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| October 2012

Kathy’s Faith Walk Kathy Osborne

For the last two weeks we have had both our daughters home for a visit. It has been so nice and we had a lot of fun talking and hearing about their lives in their respective new homes. It is wonderful to see them growing into such wonderful women of God. But I also saw something else.

When our oldest daughter moved to Las Vegas last January, she was embarking on a two-year commitment to work in the world of foster care. Her love for God and children made this a perfect place to dive in as a servant, having already gotten her feet wet in the orphanages of Mexico and the Dominican Republic. I had already accepted the idea of her working in dangerous places and her willingness to not tell me everything about what she does and where she goes. I trust the LORD for her protection, but stuff happens. Her phone calls and Facebook page are full of tearful moments when orphans find a real home for the first time, and when they languish in the system. With the heart of a servant and an inner passion and strength to see justice, she is perfect for her job: connecting orphans to Christ-following families, and then supporting them.

Home is Where the Dog is... Isn’t it?

Our other daughter went to Cannon Beach, Oregon where she served at the conference center for the summer. She was on her way home in her mind at summer’s end when God suddenly turned her heart back toward the beach. He gave her another opportunity to change, to think about another possibility, to make a decision to go a different direction. She took Him up on it and, in fact, did come back to us at summer’s end, but to pack the rest of her belongings and return “home.”

“Hey! Wait just a cotton picking minute!” my heart said. Home is in Ponderay, Idaho. Home is where you were raised, where you fell of the bike a million times, where you played with dolls and in the dirt. Home is where we all sat around the table laughing and crying and had Christmas breakfast together. Home is where the dog is. Home is where the house you were raised in is. Home is where Mom and Dad are... isn’t it?

On September 22, when I dropped my older daughter off at the airport to “go home” to Las Vegas, it began to dawn on me what was happening here. On September 24, when I dropped my younger daughter off in Cannon Beach, the gravity of the moment hit in broad daylight. And

to make matters worse, I had eight hours to drive home, alone, and come to grips with it. Hadn’t I finished crying, mourning the loss of babies in the nest? Good grief……

God is very strange. As I set out on the eight hour drive home from Cannon Beach, the LORD began to talk to my heart. He encouraged me with the knowledge that all my children are serving Him and that IS where home is. My perspective had to change. I had to see these kids as grown up adults and I do. It was just a bit of a shock to realize that they are moved out of the nest not only bodily, but in their hearts and minds as well. I should let them go. I must let them go. Holding on to some imaginary need to still be needed is a tether that can make a little bird fly crooked.

It appears that this phase of my Faith Walk, the intense parenting part, is at an end and I am letting go. The boxes are all gone, the closets empty and the toys stowed for another time. Now it is phone calls, instant messaging, Facebook, and for my part handwritten notes and care packages. This is good. It is what we worked for. They are home.

Reach Kathy at coopcountrystore@yahoo.com

FOR COUNTY COMMISSIONER THIRD DISTRICT (Vote for one)

Candidate

(Rep)

LEWIS RICH (write-in)

Paid for by Lewis Rich for Commissioner October 2012| The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page 23

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Page 24 | The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| October 2012

E

DOWNTOWN SANDPOINT EVENTS SANDPOINT EVENTS

October

Warren Miller’s

Flow State 7 pm • Panida Theater

October 20

Where the Mountain meets the Mind

Through Nov. 1 - Harvest Wine Walk in Sandpoint. Visit www.

DineAroundSandpoint.com for information.

10 Glenn Miller Orchestra, Panida Theater, 7 pm. 263-9191 12-13 Searching for Sugar Man, Panida Theater, 7:30 263-9191 13 Harvest Fest - close of the Sandpoint Farmer’s Market.

19-21 Library Wine Tasting Weekend, Pend d’Oreille Winery, 265-8545 20 Chamber of Commerce Health and Safety Fair, 10-2 pm, Bonner County Fairgrounds. 263-2161 20 Warren Miller’s Flow State, Panida Theater, 7 pm. 263-5157 23 Information on Luna Laws/ Education Reform bills, Sandpoint City Council Chambers. 7 pm 27 Halloween Costume and Dance Party, Evans Brothers Coffee, $10, 265-5553 31 Halloween at the Bonner Mall, Trick-Or-Treat 4 to 6 pm.

November

Experience

2 Teton Gravity Ski Films, Panida Theater, 8 pm. 263-9191 3 Lucas Nelson and the Promise of the Real, Panida Theater, 8 pm.

263-9191 3 Sandpoint Films Festival. Panida Little Theater, 1 pm, 4 pm and 7 pm. 263-9191 10 SARS Ski Swap, Bonner County Fairgrounds, 9-2, www.SARS.net 10 Acts Theater Production Camp, 7 pm, Panida Theater, 263-9191 10 Classical Music Concert 7 pm, venue TBA call 265-4444 10 Songwriters’ Circle, Panida Theater, 7:30 pm 263-9191

PLUS:

Monday Night Party with KPND at MickDuff’s. Enjoy football and more every Monday.

Trivia every Tuesday night at Visit www.DowntownSandpoint.com for a complete calendar of events MickDuff’s, 7 to 10 pm.

Tuesdays with Ray, Trinity at City Beach, 6 to 8 pm.

Winery Music - Live music every Friday night at Pend d’Oreille Winery Lounge Music with Neighbor John, Thursdays 6-9 at 41 South.

Club Music and wine tasting at LaRosa, Thursdays 6-9 pm.

Live music, Coldwater Creek Wine Bar, 7-10 on Fridays.

Wacky Wine Wednesdays. Di Luna’s Café 4-6 pm. 208-263-0846 Sandpoint Swap Meet, every Sunday, 9 am to 4 pm, Sandpoint Events October 2012| The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page 25 Center.

Downtown Sandpoint!

Jinxed

Jinx Beshears

I had finally recovered from both knee surgeries, learning to walk again and not look like a penguin doing it. No assistance from walkers or canes either. Stacey even let me drive to the post office once! I was really doing good. Stacey and I were out and about, walking the bridge, taking Billie to the park, doing things that a lot of people take for granted. I was feeling so good, in fact, I had one thing on my mind: camping!

We made our plans hastily while Stacey was fishing on one of the bridges that you can’t drive over up towards Johnson Creek. It was quite spontaneous.

One second we were talking about how nice the weather was going to be and the next second she was saying “Yeah, that sounds like a plan!” while reeling in her pole. We sped back to my house to pack up our gear.

Overfilling the truck with all the important camping paraphernalia I thought we needed, I told Stacey, “Hey, let’s take the dogs!” Of course, Sparkles is a male and should not have been allowed on an all-girl trip, a decision I regretted later on in the day.

We started out up Lightning Creek to a campsite we had scouted out months ago. We pulled into our campsite, set up our tables and chairs and started the fire.

I might add, we didn’t really need a fire as it was a warm day, but what is camping without a fire? I was attempting to gather enough fire starter for the next morning, so we could make fire quickly for coffee.

Trust me, Stacey without coffee is a national offense! It is so not pretty.

I will say now, it could have happened anywhere. With anybody. It could have happened at home. Sparkles was still jumping around the camp. It was his first trip out with us and he is still just a puppy.

A really big puppy. He was desperate for Aspen to play with him and, as usual,

The Dog Days of Camping

she was just as determined not to. Time moved in slow motion as Sparkles bounced against the back of my legs, causing me to fall forward. I knew I was falling on my brand new knees, so I tried to twist around so my backside would take the brunt of the fall. My backside could take it; I wasn’t sure my knees could!

Unfortunately, my left ankle wasn’t communicating correctly with my brain, so it didn’t twist with the rest of my body. I screamed. I admit it… I have never screamed so loud or hard as when my knees hit the ground and my ankle dangled off to the side. I was laying face down in the dirt. I actually felt my knees strain against my bones; it kinda felt like Velcro sounds. My ankle was twisted behind me, but all I could think about was my new knees. They are very important knees.

Stacey was standing over me, not really knowing what to do, not that she could have said anything that I could hear over the sound of my own voice screeching.

After a very long few moments, I slowly hushed into sobs so I could apologize to Stacey for making the hair on her head instantly gray and turning her tan white.

I asked her, I thought relatively calmly, to straighten out my knees. They felt like they were bent up under my bum. Stacey’s eyes bulged. “Are they still attached?”

Stacey practically fainted as she spoke.

“Yes,” I whimpered, “Just make them straight.” Stacey grabbed my right leg and I am sure she thought it was gently, but I was pretty sure she was trying to finish off my new knees by yanking them straight. Of course, then she was scared to touch me and it didn’t help that every time she did, a new round of moans and groans spurt out of my lungs.

After assuring her, I did not need an ambulance and I was going to stand up, she finished her job of straightening my legs out. No pain. What a relief to realize

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my knees were intact. It was also at that very moment I noticed my left ankle just didn’t look quite right. I had Stacey take off my shoe to look at my weird ankle. You shouldn’t do that, just so you know. When my shoe came off, my ankle exploded. I could watch my ankle swell. I only yelled out a few time right then, but man, it really hurt!

When I stood up, I almost passed out.

Stacey drove the truck over to me because I was in too much pain to put any weight on my ankle. I knew it was sprained bad!

My knees, however, were perfect.

Before we made it the 14 miles down the mountain, I had already forgiven the dog and was once again allowing the drool to flow. I made it home and, with Stacey and Brad’s help, inside and to my bed.

Go to the hospital? No way! I was tougher than that. Nothing more than a severe sprain, by tomorrow the swelling would be down and I would be fine.

Let me say right here, if you think you sprained your ankle, just buck up and go to the hospital. If you don’t, you’re gonna be in for a very long night, and I was. Then I had to get up in the morning and call Dr. Tuck and explain to her office why I was out camping when I was j recovering from two knee surgeries. I wasn’t that excited about looking Dr Tuck in the face and telling her what happened.

As it turns out I didn’t have to. Instead I had to look at the young, good-looking, new male doctor on staff. Yay, me! What an impression I must have made.

He informed me that my ankle was indeed broken, (because I can’t do anything half way ya know!) I got a removable cast and a referral to another orthopedic surgeon. Really? Again?

Not happy, I spent the weekend cussing and feeling sorry for myself. Dr. Leedle told me I didn’t need surgery. I cannot even tell you how excited I was! I almost kissed him. He put a huge boot on my left leg. It weighs about 50 pounds and feels like I am dragging a bowling ball around. I returned home and my family ushered me into the house safely, because evidently I am not capable of doing those things on my own.

Two days later a cold attacked me and bronchitis took over my lungs. A little medication and I am on the mend. Except for one thing. Now I have an appointment with the orthopedic surgeon, (De. Kym), who did my new knees. You guessed it, young and handsome. Well, poop!

Jinx, who lives up to her name, is always willing to chat. Reach her at jinxbychoice08@yahoo.com

Page 26 | The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| October 2012

The airwaves are full of repetitive crap that could only get worse if it came out in rap!

By late October it’ll be gettin’ so deep you’ll be obliged to call in a chimney sweep!

To clear the smoke that’s been blown up yer butt like so much rendered political smut, You’ll cry like a loon and howl at the moon and end up screamin’, “Hey, whuck the futt?!”

It’s ‘quid pro quo’ for the Super PACs who’ve come up with a system to cover their tracks, their image to launder, our money to squander and just how to hide those obnoxious facts.

They get out of our system just what they put in it; by greasing it well, they’re bound to win it.

“In order to form a more perfect union” and be able to treat us all like grunion.

They put in our money and take even more out as we sit here wondrin’ “How’d they get so much clout?”

Well, they did it with donations ‘n’ handouts and such by people who don’t want to be seen as ‘in touch’.

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“What’s good for the system is good for the economy and can’t be performed through any dichotomy.

We’re now married, you see, so we ‘get it for free’ and we might even finance your lobotomy!”

“Through drugs we’ve designed to help ease your mind while you all sit back and watch your assets unwind.

Don’t be a curmudgeon ‘cause we surely aint budgin’ no matter how bad yer butt’s in a bind.”

It’s not only here but around the world.

The rhetoric’s so thick that I’ve quite often hurled!

Double talk that’s hyperbolic, makin’ me think that I might have colic There was a young lass from Nantucket who made a slim livin’ sellin’ crabs from a bucket.

When asked to give freely to a campaign she felt mealy, they were shown just where they could tuck it.

She had a cousin who lived here in Heron who had a habit of cursin’ and swearin’ when he too was hit up, to contribute he spit up and quite in the mood for sharin’!

And he knew a young voter from Hope who didn’t have the money for dope, so he donated instead to some ‘talkin’ head’ and now he’s a broke misanthrope.

It’s quite often said ‘round this humble homestead that it’s better to give than receive but I’ll be dadburned if I’ll give to be spurned by some joker who’s just out to deceive They’re havin’ great fun a squeezin’ our nuts while our hands rest comfy under our butts letting BIG MONEY make all the rules.

Gross profits they’re after, not our love, fun or laughter.

Once held, they’ll never let go of our jewels.

Scott Clawson

acresnpains@dishmail.net

October 2012| The River Journal - A News Magazine Worth Wading Through | www.RiverJournal.com | Vol. 21 No. 10| Page 27

Size Matters... When you’re Fishing

I mean, you wouldn’t lie to me about a thing like that, now would you? I mean, the size of it? Or how long it is? How many times have you been lied to about a thing like that? These days women have been asking men on their first date if they practice catch and release. If they admit they do, then the woman knows how much of what he tells her she can believe.

Catch and release has been implemented into the realm of fishing with one simple intent, which is to allow the fish to grow larger and, in some cases, reproduce. It also allows other fishermen a chance to catch that same fish. Being able to grow larger seems to work quite well.

In most cases the fish doubles in size by the time the fisherman gets to the nearest bar or meets up with his friends. His wife already knows it was small and ignores his bragging, even if he swears on a stack of Field and Streams.

Women, on the other hand, say size doesn’t matter as long as they catch something. For instance, my wife, Lovie, and I were floating the Clark Fork River with Cliff Dare in one of his drift boats one afternoon.

Cliff was rowing and both of us were casting with flies. Lovie was seated in the back using a spin pole, while I had the front of the boat to

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myself, because of their constant whining about my casting ability. You’d think being caught in the ear or nose by a tiny fly wouldn’t be that annoying. I mean really, it just looks like a mosquito bite or, at the most, a pox mark. We had been out most of a beautiful day on the river and Lovie was soaking up the sun to a point of almost dozing off, leaving her lure to drift aimlessly down the river. Suddenly, her pole bent down and the break started screaming as the line was being stripped from the reel.

“Fish on,” Cliff said with a grin as Lovie kept trying to reel it in to no avail.

While the boat continued to drift down the river, Cliff started to row back up stream, but Lovie wasn’t gaining any line as the reel continued to unwind. Cliff stopped rowing and dropped the anchor.

“You’re hung up on the bottom. Hand me your rod and I will jerk it loose or break the line and if I break your lure off, I’ll just put you a new one on,” Cliff explained.

He started by giving short jerks with the pole and then he yanked real hard several times, causing both Lovie and myself to dive for the bottom of the boat.

No one wanted to get hit in the head with a piece of lead the size of a 45 slug with hooks on it. But the lure didn’t come loose, nor did the line snap. Cliff set there for a minute dumbfounded, and then the line started to move off in a different direction.

“Here, take your pole, what you got here is a big fish,” he said with a surprised look.

After what seemed like hours of

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fighting this fish with light tackle, Lovie finally brought the fish alongside the boat where Cliff and I both guessed it to weigh between 12 and 14 lbs.

Lovie said, “Well, maybe six.”

Women just won’t believe guys when the evidence is right in front of them. Go figure. She missed the weight of a chicken at the supermarket the other day by twelve pounds. No wait, that was me. I thought it was a turkey. Hey, when they’re naked like that they all look alike.

A friend of mine, who I fish with quite often, has Hairlip Charters Out of Hope, Idaho. He’s always bragging on how much bigger the fish he catches are than everyone else. Funny, that never happens when I fish with him! You’d think he was from Texas rather than California the way he tells stories. So I bought one of those liar’s scales you get at any sporting goods stores. They’re spring loaded, so the weight they give you is quite questionable.

A five-pound fish may weigh as much as seven pounds or as little as three. I hung it up in a tree and tied a forty pound rock on it and left it overnight; by morning the spring had lost its tension. I slipped it on his boat and now everything he catches weighs twice its normal weight. He thinks all the fish caught on his charters are whoppers! Even his clients are pleased with their near record fish.

I figure you can’t go through life without going on at least one snipe hunt, and I thought I had sure passed that a long time ago, but, recently I have found myself on several. Seems I have wanted to catch myself a mess of walleye. Everyone who has done so claims they are the best eating of any fish, any where. Now, I have sampled many species of fish prepared in all the ways recommended by all the experts and their wives, but it wasn’t until I started to pursue this fish seriously that I found out what a snipe hunt this could be.

First, my friend and fishing buddy, Dave, the Indian guide from Spokane, took me on a snipe hunt to Banks Lake. I should have gotten suspicious when we put our Ray Allen is available for private parties, weddings, restaurants, and all corporate events. Ray Allen plays acoustic guitar and sings jazz standards, pop tunes, country, and originals from the 30s through the 70s. Music for all ages. Includes use of my PA system for announcements. Clean cut and well dressed for your event. PA rentals for events.

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boat in the water and everyone else was taking theirs out. All day we jigged, doodle socked and bounced bait on the bottom. We even harnessed up a worm to a wire pogo stick and bounced it off the bottom. All day we entertained and amused those fish. I even thought at one point I heard one giggle. My wrist hasn’t been that sore since I was a teenager; in fact, I had to eat my beans lefthanded that night!

While Dave is an excellent fisherman and seldom has to stretch the size of his catch, we found ourselves skunked on not one, but three trips and on three separate lakes no less.

When our old guide and friend Tim Johnson, from Clarkston, Washington, found out our dilemma on catching walleye he just laughed.

“Meet me in Spokane and we’ll go walleye fishing,” he offered.

The first morning at China Bend on the Columba River I caught my first walleye. A twenty-one incher, and as they say, the rest is history. Hell, there’s nothing to this snipe hunting if you have the right guide. But by two o’clock that afternoon the temperature was 100+, and yes, it can get too hot to fish. But my snipe hunting was over. And by the way; they are the best eating fish you ever locked a lip around.

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