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Shedding light on the arts in Trinity ARTP16

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THAT FACEBOOK FEELING Love, life, and relationships all through the news feed

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RACHEL ALLEN

The TV chef reveals her top tips for student cooking


COVERNOTESP2

Catriona

Notorious Its the morning after and our girl is mortified. Words: Victoria Notaro

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est case scenario. It all starts with mad passion and reckless abandon. A kiss turns into something more, bodies become fused together like they’ll never be wedged apart and the animal in you takes over. And it’s all fabulous. Eventually you drift off into a satisfied sleep, warm and drowsy after all the eh…exertion. Flash forward. It’s eight in the morning, bright out and you’ve just woken up starkers. There’s a body in bed beside you, one that you were doing kinda carnal things to a few hours before. Things you might just be a wee bit self conscious about now the hormones have abated. It’s happened to the best of us. Well, those of us that bother to stay the night, anyway. You’ve slept with somebody for the first time (and in some cases, definitely the last time) and now that you’re feeling decidedly less sexual in the light of day, there’s room for another emotion. Mortification. There’s fear in almost every situation, unless you happen to be a supermodel. If it was a one night kinda thing, you’re wondering how to get to your knickers across the room without this stranger seeing your stretch marks. If it’s the start of what you hope to be a new relationship, you’re hoping the body that might have seemed fabulous and graceful in the twilight won’t make him puke in the stark light of day. Now I’m not just talking about body hang ups here. I’m also talking about morning breath, the biggest romance killer of all time. I get really annoyed when I see couples on TV waking up in full make-up without panda eyes and kissing their co-star passionately. This gives men a bad impression that all women should wake up ethereal and goddess like. We do not. I have distinct memories of waking up and wondering how to get out of bed in the nip and race to clean

Photo courtesy of The Fury of Tim

terviewing the very enigmatic Sons and Daughters, The Fury of Tim and Los Campesinos! (check out the backpage if you fancy a free ticket to their next gig). For Fashion, we get to see what mature students think of Trinity’s fashion sense and we get a glimpse at the work of fashion students in NCAD. Last of all, this issue’s cover is dedicated to the upcoming Trinity Arts Festival, which is much anticipated by all!

I get really annoyed when I see couples on TV waking up in full make-up without panda eyes and kissing their co-star passionately.

my teeth without yer man noticing. Water by the bed helps, but coupled with nerves, morning breath is a powerful creature. Another thing - what went on while you were asleep? I am both a cuddler and a talker. A friend of mine is a sweater. Another is a kicker. Adding a strange bed and a warm body to this mix might result in all of the above. I once had a very vivid dream which led me to talk aloud. I was having a conversation with somebody called Frank who happened to be on top of me in my subconscious. “Frank, Jesus, get off me! Not now. Frank, I’m serious, get off me!” Thankfully Himself and I had been together quite a while at this stage, and I assured him that there has and never will be (I hope) a man called Frank on top of me. Imagine that happened on the first night we spent together? Maybe putting on underwear after the throes of passion might help. Or even a t-shirt. Perhaps flannelette full length pyjamas, deodorant, mouthwash and ambient music to avoid vivid dreaming is in order? After all, a girl must be prepared. Here, lads, I’ll let you in on a secret. THAT’S what we keep in our gigantic handbags.

COLLEGE BANDS: The Fury of Tim

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or this issue, the exceedingly elusive Lara O’Connor has written a feature on relationships, Facebook style. Edibles gets inspired by the prospect of Shrove Tuesday, and gives you instructions on how to make the perfect pancake. If it’s recipies you’re after, then look out for our interview with Rachel Allen, who shares some of her favourite student dishes with TN2. Meanwhile, Hugh McCafferty has been busy in-

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ome people have compared The Fury of Tim to My Bloody Valentine and Mogwai. Although complimentary, such comparisons are inaccurate. Where My Bloody Valentine get the digs in early with an immediate blast of impenetrable noise, The Fury of Tim wear the listener down slowly, patiently, over the course of a song. Where Mogwai layer delicate harmonies over waves of distortion, The Fury of Tim pound out guitar mantras that seem to operate on a much more primal level. Drone rock, then, along the lines of Earth – but infinitely more listenable – might be a more apt description. “We actually brought in Earth CDs as a reference point when we were recording before Christmas,” guitarist John Kealy explains. Eager not to some across as too obscenely pretentious, he continues, “I think of music as texture. There are infinite ways of playing the same chord, depending on how you strike it, the effects you use etc.” “We’re not just interested in melody,” drummer Ronan Lyne takes over, “dynamics are especially important; we’re very riffbased.” Indeed, in a typical song, the band will take a riff and play it over and over again in an attempt to play it differently, somehow, every time. On paper, that may sound tedious, but in practise it can be mesmerising. And when the crescendos kick in, it’s not just for chinstrokers, either. “I used to imagine that fans of ours would be very much hardcore music fans, into obscure stuff, but I get surprised by the kind of people who react positively to us,” Ronan remarks. The band will be playing in the college chapel at this year’s Trinity Arts Festival. It will be a rare opportunity to hear them in a venue so well suited to their sound. At the moment, times and dates are unconfirmed, but it should take place on either the 12th or 13th of February- check out their website. www.furyoftim.com www.myspace.com/furyoftim


Sons and Daughters

P3INTERVIEW Sons and Daughters discuss their new record, illuminate the enigma that is Morrissey and warn about the perils of micro sleep. Words: Hugh McCafferty

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n the release of their second album, The Repulsion Box, back in 2005, Glasgow’s Sons and Daughters seemed to be going places. Critical reaction to the record was positive and a string of support slots for high-profile acts such as Idlewild and Franz Ferdinand added fuel to the already blazing fire. Somehow, though, it didn’t quite come together and despite a punishing tour schedule, the four-piece failed to get the level of attention they seemed to warrant. Two and a half years later, the band are back with a new record, This Gift, and no less ambition than before. Produced by former Suede member and all-round guitar legend Bernard Butler, the album sounds a lot more assured than previous efforts. I spoke to front woman Adele Bethel and guitarist/vocalist Scott Paterson about the new album and what it was like to work with Butler. “He’s a lovely guy, socially”,Paterson begins, “but I’ve never been more tense in the studio.” It would seem that there were serious differences in opinions during the recording sessions. “Scott almost hit him at one point”, Bethel explains, glancing at her bandmate with a grin. “Bernard’s fiery and passionate”, she continues, “and we clashed because we are too.” Studio spats aside, the two are quite pleased with the new record. The band still sound like an American folk-playing garage rock band, but this time around, they’ve added a few more classically British flourishes, such as the Johnny Marr guitar licks of standout track “Iodine”. “We never really think about what new songs are going to sound like,

but we did want to make a record that, like with the Smiths, was catchy but had depth as well”, Paterson explains. On the subject of the Smiths, I asked them what it was like to tour with Morrissey back in 2006. “Beautiful”, Paterson returns with an --irrepressible smile, “it was great to meet him”. The former Smiths front man has certainly had a patchy relationship with the media, and, indeed, other bands, over the years. His most recent altercation involves the NME, against whom he took a lawsuit in December after the publication allegedly took an interview quote out of context, portraying him as a racist. “He’s a gentleman”, according to Bethel, “but he keeps to himself. He distrusts the media, I think, with good cause”.Nodding sympathetically, pen and notebook in hand, I decide to move swiftly on. The band are set to tour for the next four months, after which the summer festival season will kick in, bringing with it more dates. And after that? “Touring, touring, touring”,Paterson returns, with a look of both dread and delight. I wonder whether they ever suffer from tour fatigue. “You always have adrenaline to play shows; you get the energy from somewhere”, Bethel tells me, “except for that time Scott went into a micro-sleep in the middle of a gig in Hamburg”, she says, throwing a teasing look at the guitarist. For the uninitiated, micro-sleep is an unexpected onset of sleep that lasts only a few seconds, but that leaves the subject confused and disorientated. Not something you’d like to happen during a show, then. “I hadn’t slept in, like, two days”, Paterson explains, with a look that would suggest his bandmates have extracted the story a few times already. “It worked out alright though, I don’t

think anyone noticed.” There’s no doubt, then, that the touring can be intense, but it pays off, as when the band went to Australia a year and a half ago. “When we got off the airplane, we saw kids wearing our tshirts; in the taxi, the radio was playing our songs; all of our dates there sold out. It was bizarre”, Paterson says. “We got our first magazine cover there too”, Bethel adds. Touring aside, the group have been involved in other activities between albums, including last year’s “Ballads of the Books” project. Spearheaded by Idlewild’s Roddy Woomble, the project involved eighteen Scottish poets presenting a poem of theirs to one of eighteen Scottish bands, who then wrote a song using the words provided as lyrics. Sons and Daughters found themselves paired up with the poet A.L. Kennedy. “Alison Kennedy picked us personally”, Bethel enthuses. The band received the poem just days before they were meant to record the finished song. “It was one of the quickest songs we’ve ever written, which usually isn’t a good thing, but we actually really love it”, Bethel concludes. On the subject of further collaborations, Paterson doesn’t hesitate, “I’ve always said my ambition was to work with David Lynch”. And Bethel? “Leonard Cohen. But I don’t think there’s much chance of that happening,” she laughs. For the time being, though, their minds will be focused on the upcoming album release (it’s in shops now) and coinciding tour, which includes a date in Whelans on 17 February. Will the group scale the heights of rock stardom this time around? It’s hard to know. One thing’s for sure, though: they’ll put on a passionate show either way.


FEATUREP4 News Feed

Preferences

January 29 Updated: Lara O’Connor is no longer in a relationship Updated: Lara O’Connor created a group “All Men are bastards” Just for fun - Inside jokes Info: For all those ladies out there doing it for themselves and abandoning men see more

Updated: Lara O’Connor left the group “All you need is love” January 28 Lara O’Connor is bewildered. Sarah Hughes tagged Lara O’Connor in 3 photos. Tagged in: Random Photos

January 26 Updated: Lara O’Connor joined the group “All you need is love”

Lara O’Connor has given a Love Monkey to John Carroll.

Mwah!

View my gits | Give Lara a gift


P5FEATURE

Relationship status: It’s complicated

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acebook makes me nervous. You never know what is lurking around the virtual corner, what nugget of information is just a mouse click away. You get that tingling Facebook feeling as you log on and click your way through comments, the slight knot in your stomach that is always there. Sometimes it can be a harmless invitation to a party (in which case I scrutinise the list of confirmed guests and base my attendance on that), but other times, it can be something else. Something darker, something that I don’t want to know… “Karen Coombe has spanked John Carroll with a blowup sheep”.There it is – the private/public flirting of your ex-boyfriend plastered in front of you. Sometimes ignorance is bliss. But up pops the news feed with our daily fill of scandal and I can not help but click onto this Karen Coombe and skim through her photos of nights out and track her changing hairstyle... I am a Facebook masochist; although it hurts, I cannot pull myself out of the digital whirlpool of buzzing with people I hardly know. In this modern technological age, Facebook is the devourer of all things. It devours our time, our relationships and even our friends. In the past three years, there has been a digital boom in the online life – Facebook, Bebo, MySpace, to mention the most prolific, are dominating our social lives both privately and publicly. At the time of writing this article, the Trinity network on Facebook has 8465 members – a figure which is steadily increasing every day. This internet trend of blogging was initially reserved solely for cyber-geeks, but now, the personal blog has emerged as the friendly version of seedy web chat. It is now the most fashionable way to communicate with friends. Everyone who is anyone and anyone who is no one has an online identity. Not getting on too well in the real world? In this cyber age that we live in, that doesn’t matter anymore. With the joy of the internet, we can conduct conversations, relationship and even sexual acts without leaving our rooms, getting dressed or brushing our teeth. In the course of research for this article, I came across a prominent broadsheet Irish newspaper who recently ran an article pronouncing that

With the joy of the internet, we can conduct conversations, relationship and even sexual acts without leaving our rooms, getting dressed or brushing our teeth.

Irish university students are turning away from Bebo and moving up to Facebook. The blithe reporter gleefully trawled through the benefits of Facebook – whether it is used to meet new debating partners or play Scrabble with friends in Germany. Another article I came across was a sort of Facebook manners tutorial in which the journalist recommended specific Facebook etiquette such as: “Don’t leave your status unchanged for 3 weeks… you don’t want to appear lazy”. Despite this profusion of Facebook popularity, what effect does this cyber society obsession have on our real, everyday lives where we are not zombies or vampires but ordinary mortals? A friend of mine recently broke up with his boyfriend and has found himself in a new turn-of-the-century problem following a break-up. In previous years when relationships ended, all our predecessors had to worry about was ripping up the odd photograph and throwing out old love letters – a private, cathartic process of removing someone from your life. The modern day equivalent is logging into your Facebook homepage and systematically deleting them from your digital life. As your life changes, your Facebook status must change also… and

simultaneously, your whole Facebook network is notified. From computer room to college dorm to lecture hall, daily news feeds keep everyone in your cyber circle posted on who is dating and who is being dumped. In one sense, this is a positive development as it cuts out any awkward questions about the break up – everyone is informed of the news, therefore, you are not accountable for telling everyone you know. However, saying that, there is something clinical about this new way to communicate. Following a break-up, the tears and the rows are difficult, but the worst part of all is logging on and finding that you have been digitally dumped. John Carroll is no longer in a relationship. The stark internet world… a statement complete with a little broken heart symbol. If only the real world was that simple. If only we could digitally erase people’s touch, smell, past from our bodies… but we can’t. Perhaps this is why the digital dump is so difficult – this merging of private emotions and public reality brings a certain sense of inescapable finality. But there are no cyber tears… we are all determined to put on a brave face (book). We post scores of smiling photos preferably taken with scores of equally smiling attractive friends having the time of our cyber lives. “Me and Shane”, click “Me and Shane again”, click, “Me and Shane Locked”… and so forth. Up the photos go with steely determination to be virtually fabulous; meanwhile, we brush our real tears aside, trying not to let them fall on the keyboard and short circuit the computer. We create our online identity through the basic headlines which have been laid out for us by the Facebook Big Brother: Name, Sex, Birthday, Hometown, Religious and Political Views. Then on to the more personal details: favourite quotes, favourite books, films, music and personal employment history (including dates, addresses and phone numbers of employers.) Facebook is a social curriculum vitae, we are effectively marketing ourselves to our peers. College can be an intimidating place; many people find this cyber world as an accessible alternative to meet people, get involved with societies and make friends. However, we must not forget

that Facebook is not merely a social tool, it is a social weapon. In the wrong hands, it is a weapon which can be orchestrated in the most delicate ways to increase popularity, create internet rivalry and manipulate people. Everyone looks hot on Facebook or interesting or fun to be around or whatever public persona you are trying to embody. It is the equivalent to a glossy celebrity magazine – except the people you read about are people you know (most of the time). The most frightening manifestation of this is walking through campus and finding yourself staring at someone who you just cannot place… and then you realise, you have crossed digital paths, never spoken, never been introduced and yet you are intimately aware of this person’s current social standing and life. But no one can admit to this without seeming a little bit creepy… so we avoid their gaze and carry on walking. To conclude, we have to be careful about the way in which we use this social network – this tool which is supposed to be helping us to communicate can, in fact, push us further away from each other. It is a bad sign when we are spanking, poking and tickling people online and then pass them in Front Square without saying hello. The idea of Facebook etiquette is a tricky one – we feel guilty for examining the private details of other people’s lives, for clambering through their comments and pictures whilst “facebook stalking”, as it is known in circles. However, since this information is presented in a public forum (or limited forum such as Trinity network), surely it exists purely for us to examine and process. How can we create a balance between our public social performances and private emotional realities? Excess of knowledge about other people’s lives is often not a good thing. Personal mystery and the excitement of the unknown has been erased in this saturated digital world that we live in. This world is all about the known, the visual and the public… which many consider a positive change. I know I should push my Luddite tendencies to the back of my mind and embrace this new technology, but there is still something about this Facebook family which makes me want to pull my eyes out.


FILMP6

WAR MURDER S E X the Dublin Inte

rnational Film Festival

Words: Conor O’Kelly

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here is no Garbo. There is no Dietrich. There is only Louise Brooks!” So claimed Henri Langlois, the Head of the French Cinematheque. In the 1920’s, Louise Brooks was an original screen siren, a showgirl turned actress; her trademark bob haircut made her instantly recognisable and her fans were legion. Then, at the height of her fame, and in a pique of diva-esque behaviour, Ms. Brooks quit Paramount Pictures and decamped to Europe to work with the German director G. W. Pabst. Tragically, and illustrative of the power of the studios in Hollywood in the 1920’s, Brooks’ acts of defiance and disloyalty meant she was denied any offers of significant roles when she returned to the United States. Louise Brooks died in 1984. Brooks deserved popularity as an actress: the fact that she had an affair with Charlie Chaplin and that she was a close friends of William Randolph Hearst would have been sufficient to earn her a place in film and media history. As it turns out, ironically, it is the work which she completed in Europe, contributing to the demise of her career in Hollywood, that has contributed most to her bona fide status as a screen legend of the twentieth century. Pandora's Box (1929) directed by German Expressionist G.W. Pabst,

when Brooks thumbed her nose at the United States studio system, remains her most celebrated role as a sexual ingénue and is considered a masterpiece of one of cinema’s most creative and formative decades. Nearly eighty years later, Pandora's Box is being screened as part of this year’s Dublin International Film Festival. If my superlatives are not enough to convince you to skip along to the screening, perhaps the live musical accompaniment by the avant garde group 3epkano or the film’s notable first big screen lesbian kiss is enough to convince. Now in its sixth year of sponsorship with Jameson, Ireland’s premier film festival is showing signs of maturity – over 100 screening, premieres, discussions and events are planned between 15 and 24 February. While the full schedule for the film festival will not be released until tickets go on sale on 29 January, a few details have been released by Programme Director Grainne Humphreys. Anyone interested in queer studies will be eagerly anticipating Savage Grace, directed by Tom Kalin, director of the new queer cinema favourite Swoon (1992). Starring Julianne Moore, this film tells the bizarre story of the 1972 Barbara Daly Baekeland murders involving an incestuous mother / homosexual son relationship culminating in matricide. This film has

Savage Grace tells the bizarre story of the Barbara Daly Baekeland murders involving an incestuous mother/ homosexual son relationship, culminating in matricide.

been under wraps for quite some time, with a 2007 Cannes screening receiving rapturous reviews. The Irish and Polish film communities will both be out in force to welcome, Danuta Stenka, the star of Andrzej Wajda’s latest film Katyn, is a promised attendee for the Irish premiere. Wajda has been honoured with both an honorary Oscar and a Golden Bear for his contributions to cinema, in a career that has spanned seven decades. Katyn tells the story of a

notorious massacre of Polish prisoners of war and political prisoners (think lawyers, landowners, journalists etc.) by Soviet soldiers. This is a subject very close to Wajda’s heart in that his father, a Polish cavalry officer, was killed in the massacre, which claimed upwards of 20000 lives. Expect this to sell out early on. Finally, we all know someone who, at every given opportunity and a moment’s notice, is prepared to strap a surfboard to the roof of their Volkswagen Golf and head for the wilds of Bundoran or Lahinch in search of the perfect “Tube”. Well, I thought this was a relatively recent phenomenon, but I am willing to be set right in my (apparent) misapprehension. As Waveriders would have it, Irishmen are the original instigators of the modern surf lifestyle, having brought it to California from Hawaii and then contributing to the establishment of a surf culture proper… dude. If all this sounds too deliciously improbable to be true, get yourself along to the premiere, which is bound to be high five-tastic event. These are only a few example of what promises to be a really enjoyable festival. One word of warning: tickets for these screenings will sell-out. The Dublin International Film Festival opens on the 15 of February. Tickets go on sale on the 29 of January.


P7FILM

Sing ‘M’ for murder

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pparently Tim Burton wears a pair of pin-stripe socks as a lucky charm at every premiere and special occasion. He supposedly never remembers his dreams, apart from one recurring dream involving the girl he fell in love with in high school, and word on the Internet rumour mill is that he is set to direct the Broadway musical version of Batman. It would appear that even in everyday life, the man who brought us such films as Beetlejuice, Mars Attacks! and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is every bit as deliciously weird as we like to imagine him. Despite protests from Burton to the contrary, “I could dress in a clown costume and laugh with the happy people, but they’d still say I’m a dark personality” - we still like to think of him as a misunderstood outcast who finds cathartic release in gothic horror. Therein lies the essence of Burton’s appeal. Even if he were literally to dress in a clown costume and “laugh with the happy people”, you just KNOW he’d find a way to make it disturbing. Let’s face it, this man could make a film about the Andrex puppy and it would put us all off toilet paper for life. Burton was born and raised in

Words: Emma Keaveney

Burbank, California and spent much of his formative years indoors, consuming low budget horror movies. These films clearly had a great effect on the young Burton – once he even staged an axe murder with his brother to scare the neighbours, who then promptly informed the police. A talented artist, he won a fellowship at Disney after graduating from art school. There he worked as an animator on films such as The Fox and the Hound, but quickly became disenchanted with Disney’s refusal to accommodate his artistic vision. After a string of quirky short films, Burton was presented with 1988’s Beetlejuice - the film that firmly set his style of pop-gothic in the public imagination for the first time. Warner Brothers, impressed by Burton’s ability to spin a big hit from a small budget, then assigned him to direct Batman (1989), which turned out to be one of the highest grossing film releases of all time. Burton’s career had gone super-stellar and the 90’s brought a string of neogothic crowd-pleasers: Edward Scissorhands (1990), Batman Returns (1992), Mars Attacks! (1996) and Sleepy Hollow (1999), as well as the critically acclaimed but financially unsuccessful Ed Wood (1994). Since then, cinema-

goers have been served up a slightly bizarre re-imagining of Planet of the Apes (2001), a fantastically tall tale of America’s Deep South (Big Fish, 2003), an exuberant adaptation of Roald Dahl’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005) and a stop-motion animation film loosely based on Russian-Jewish folklore (Corpse Bride, 2005). All in a day’s work for the man in the pinstriped socks. So it would appear to be business as usual for Burton with his latest offering, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street. An adaptation of the Stephen Sondheim stage musical, Sweeney Todd marks Burton’s sixth collaboration with Johnny Depp and his most likely film yet to be a significant Oscar contender. Widely accepted to be the stuff of mere legend, the gruesome tale of Sweeney Todd was once matched in notoriety only by Jack the Ripper. Todd would cut his customers’ throats while they sat in his barber’s chair, then send their bloody corpses down a chute into the cellar below, where they were chopped up and used as the filling for meat pies by his accomplice in crime, Mrs. Nellie Lovett — pies that were then sold to an unsuspecting public. Johnny Depp plays Benjamin Barker (a.k.a.

Sweeney Todd) while Helena Bonham Carter, another Burton staple player, plays the widow Mrs. Nellie Lovett. Diehard fans of the stage version should approach with caution as numerous cuts, edits and changes were made, most notably the omission of the famous “Ballad of Sweeney Todd”.However, this is certainly not to the expense of the film’s overall effect. Burton clearly relishes in the film’s Kill Bill style fantasy gore - another element that distances it significantly from the stage version - making Sweeney Todd an orgy of abject bloody delight. The murder scenes are mouthwatering (there’s a sentence I never thought I’d say!) reminding you of the undeniably cinematic qualities of squelchy, tomato-red blood on the big screen. The horror is augmented by another powerhouse performance by Johnny Depp, this time reportedly inspired by the 1940’s character actor Peter Lorre (and Depp fans will love seeing him in a musical again after John Water’s Cry Baby). So if you feel yourself intrigued by the mere idea of a musical slasher, then I would highly recommend tripping along to your local multiplex. Sweeney Todd is bloody brilliant.


MUSICP8

the soft bullet in

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hese days, College structures seem to be all about change – semesters and modules, merging departments: all in the name of making the College experience a better one for students everywhere. Indeed. However, there are plenty of ideas they have missed out on in the interests of the learning experience. Powerpoint presentations and lecture notes are all very well; but in these times of change, we must once again turn to internet-based entertainment nuggets for inspiration. Stronger than a moose and coming at us like a buzzard in the Olympia this September, the Mighty Boosh have, in their third season, shown us the way forward for class presentations with a twist – or more specifically, a crimp. No more for us the mediocrity of the prose-style discourse on whatever we were supposed to read for class this week: behold instead the might of the randomly-structured junkbeat rhyming genius that is the crimp. Check it out at http://www.veoh.com/videos/ v25620973bPzebeW. And if presentations with props are your thing, the excellence that is Potter Puppet Pals has proved to us that hand puppets are by no means a thing of the past and seaside Punch&Judy shows. Even if you are not a major Potter fan (don’t worry, there are support groups out there) you can still appreciate this musical ode to the essential comedy of the characters, from Naked Dumbledore to an all-singing, all-dancing Snape. Just think of the possibilities for tutorial frolics: Joyce v. Beckett prose-off scenarios, Mozart v. Salieri conducting a battle of the bands…and if you want to get involved on a larger scale, you could always try demonstrating quantum physics laws through the eternal medium of modern dance. See the pals in action at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tx1 XIm6q4r4 and see how you can live the dream for your next class effort. And as for entertainment of the live variety, Forever Presents have some great Whelan’s shows coming up in February, including Laura Veirs on the 6, Chrome Hoof on the 12 and The Dillinger Escape Plan on the 16. EnjoyT!

Lara O’Connor invstigates the virtual world of Relationships on Facebook FEATURE P4-5

Words: Carolyn Power

Sonic Youths Resistance is futile: Los Campesinos! will defeat you with irresistible hooks, razor-sharp lyrics and more exclamation marks than you can possibly hope to defy. Words: Hugh McCafferty

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e might be doing this show when we come over, I wonder if you could tell me something about it”, Aleks Campesinos inquires. “Em, what’s it called again? Ooh! Tubridy Tonight! Do you know it?” I begin to stutter. Laying bare the true horrors of RTÉ’s Friday night television atrocity is not an option. It would be like explaining what goes on in the glue factory to Clip-Clop the lovable horse. Or kicking a puppy that was wearing an adorable little woolly hat in the face. I mumble something incoherently, laugh awkwardly a little and change the subject. Crisis averted. Such is the sense of unadulterated joy that Los Campesinos! inspire in me. But perhaps I’m being unfair to the band, for they are by no means a troupe of drooling, loved-up idiots. On the contrary, their lyrics point towards a wry, observant sense of humour in songs such as “The International Tweexcore Underground” and their ability to grab listeners with infectious pop hooks is masterful, even at this early stage. “I think we’re a bit wary of coming across as too happy”, Aleks, who plays keyboard and shares lead vocal duties, admits. The video for next single “Death to Los Campesinos!”, then, where the band are attacked

and murdered by a marauding wave of kittens, balloons and rainbows, seems quite appropriate. “We’re being attacked by quite pleasant things, really”, Aleks notes. “We want to make people aware that there’s more to us, that there’s an edginess there.” The seven-piece are set to release their debut album Hold On, Youngster on 25 February. I asked Aleks what it was like to work with Broken Social Scene collaborator Dave Newfeld, who produced the record. “We were a bit nervous at first, but Dave was very inspiring. It was nice to feel that you could make mistakes and that you had the time to get things right.” Looking at the band’s progress over the last year, it’s easy to forget that they are, essentially, a university band, having formed at the University of Cardiff in 2006. I asked Aleks if she had any parting advice for students with dreams of indie stardom. “Well, it’s difficult; we never set out to get signed, our only aim was to play one students’ union gig,” she recalls. “We were bored with a lot of other music, so we just tried to create something that sounded new. I suppose, then, it’s important to try to do something different. And enjoy it.” Presuming they survive their ordeal on Tubridy Tonight, Los Campesinos! will play the Village on 11 February. It’s going to be deadly.


P9MUSIC

W

hat do you get when you cross an embryonic comic book incarnation, a celluloid junkie songwriter and a Theramin afficionado? The answer is Dev Hynes, aka Lightspeed Champion: the name comes from a comic book character that was started on his schoolday mathbooks and is rapidly becoming a member of a collabrative comic and a graphic novel that’s still very much in the works. Striking out from previous bands like Test Icicles, his debut album Falling Off The Lavender Bridge proves him to be a serious contender for the indie-darling throne, with songs ranging from the anthemic and insanely-worded “Galaxy of the Lost” (I believe I have referred to the ‘now we kiss and I’m sick in your mouth’ line before – that one pretty much never leaves you) to the breezily sardonic “Devil Tricks for a Bitch” and the sonic seascape of “Salty Water”. There is also a slightly restless roaming spirit to the album, which makes sense when you consider Hynes’ travels from his Houston, Texas birth through Edinburgh and Essex to London, where he still lives – although the album travelled still more, recording in Omaha, Nebraska with a cast of dabblers including producer Mike Mogis of Saddle Creek Records, Nate

INREVIEW

Interpol Venue: RDS Date: 2 December 2007 Words: Tim Smyth

CHILLING in the name of

Lightspeed Champion proves that there’s still hope for indie in his debut Falling Off The Lavender Bridge, and chats about TV addictions and the future of the theramin. Words: Carolyn Power Walcott, Clark Baechle, vocalist Emmy the Great and moonlighting sessions from members of Tilly and the Wall and Cursive. Given the seemingly effortless sonic witchery of his debut, you may well assume that Hynes himself would be something of an interesting character for a chat. And you would be very right indeed. Talking to him before his last Whelan’s gig, he was expansive and entertaining, despite being tour-weary and somewhat nervous (or freaking out, to paraphrase the man himself) at

playing his first Irish show. When reassured that Irish crowds have a reputation for being positively responsive, he was visibly relieved – due to the fact, he explained, that “I just get so nervous, and I say a lot of stupid shit on stage. I mean I don’t know if anyone’s even going to turn up!” Naturally turn up we did in droves, and also naturally, the gig was sweet. Music alone, however, is not Hynes’ only concern: television looms large in his list of vested interests. The OC, one of his favourites, even gets a namecheck

on “Let The Bitches Die” (calm down, he’s not a raging misogynist) and when asked what television show he’d most like to contribute some music to, he was delightfully verbose: ‘Oh, wow…All. I mean, if I could give a list…I’m a really big That 70’s Show fan, but I mean that doesn’t exist any more, so it wouldn’t happen unless there was some weird clip episode or something. The OC, The Hills, Laguna Beach…what else? Angel, but that’s over as well…Lost, but they don’t really have music…24…I don’t even own a TV, but I’m a huge TV fan. Well then, how about writing for TV itself? “Definitely. I mean, I just love writing – I love recording, but I love writing more. If I was asked to write a song for someone, I would do it right then and there…but nobody ever asks me!” You may also be wondering where the theramin comes in. Well, Hynes is a bit of a multi-instrumentalist, so I asked the usually hypothetical question concerning the weirdest instrument he would like to have on the next album – and the response, “Well, I play the theramin – I’d love to own one, actually – that has to go on the next one. Definitely”, pretty much sealed my opinion that this character is quite possibly 2008’s embodiment of wicked cool.

Teutonic stomp

I

’ll be honest: Interpol always struck me as an odd prospect. Not fun enough to be Franz Ferdinand, too clean to be The Strokes and too Krautrock to be New Yorkers, I could never really figure them out. Besides, Carlos Dengler looks like a vampire and Paul Banks' lyrics always seemed to have been written by an East German who has difficulties relating to other people. No, it all seemed a little too European for me. Of course, that was before I saw them live. So, while the word “revelatory” might seem a little too Biblical in this context, I'll go ahead and use it anyway. They kept us waiting, mind. I think we could all have done without the support act Friendly Fires, who don't seem to have realised that Klaxons were joking when they came up with this whole “nu-rave” thing – which died about three weeks ago. Granted some of their songs have the odd anthemic cadence in the chorus and their guitarist plays like a post-punk Nick Zinner, but when I saw the cowbell and police-car light, I'll admit I switched off. Then the temperature in the place dropped about four degrees, Interpol swept on-stage as only they can and slunk into the sinister, spectral “Pioneer To The Falls”. It's the most deliciously eerie song of 2007 and also the moment the quartet became the streamlined, minimalist auditorium act they always threatened to become. Against its soundscape of

chiming guitar, echoing piano and spongy bass, frontman Banks' hollow voice sounded even more spookily declamatory than ever. They don't have to resort to the flashy gimmicks of the nu-ravers to get the crowd going: all they need is their repertoire. The pogoing reached a frenzy during Antics's highlights ”C'mere” and “Evil”, and the Teutonic stomp of “Say Hello To Angels” was as terrifying as it was exhilarating. Granted, one or two songs – most notably “No I In Threesome” – failed to fly, and the decision to play stately dirge “Rest My Chemistry” and the beautiful, interminable “The Lighthouse” either side of “Slow Hands” was like stopping a rollercoaster before it gets to the fun bit. Even still, though, the odd slow number was welcome, with “Hands Away” (from their 2002 debut Turn On The Bright Lights) adding some much needed shade and depth. Given the strength of their set, it was hard to know what tricks they could pull out of the bag for the encore. “PDA”, however, did the job beautifully, with Kessler again acting as the hyperactive foil to Banks' stock-still delivery. And then, with drummer Sam Fogarino pausing a moment to tantalise the crowd with his hat and with a wiggly-fingered wave from not-so-vampiric-after-all Dengler, away they go, leaving this hack duly converted to their suited-and-booted delights.


FASHIONP10

A true passion for fashion

Laura Corrigan checks out the up and coming design talent at NCAD.

Photos: Caroline O’Leary

I

t’s a bitterly cold Thursday morning when I find myself lurking outside the distinctive blue gate of the National College of Art & Design. I’m here to interview the fashion students, but a thought sits uncomfortably in my head. Irish fashion design- isn’t that a contradiction in terms? The team from Trinity News are led to the design workshop through a labyrinth of building work, meanwhile keeping an eye out for the eccentric fashion aficionados and the paint-speckled alternative types art schools are famed for. The doors open onto a room steeped in creativity- swathes of material looped around mannequins and billboard-sized images of models in daring patterns adorn the walls. The minute I step across the threshold, I realise that I have happened upon something I didn’t think existed within the confines of Ireland. We are pointed towards the students’ personal workstations on the upper level, where we are to meet the budding designers. To be admitted to the NCAD Fashion Design course, a core first year must be successfully completed in the College. Once in second year, students get experience learning about a wide range of fashion aspects: including knitwear, pattern cutting, illustration and manufacturing techniques. The students seem self-assured and confident; the answers to our questions come easily, no doubt a result of the critique given by the tutors in the coursean ability to be able to defend your stylistic choices and give poised reflections is a crucial part of surviving the fashion business. For some of the students, the combination of style and design has been their focus from an early age, while for others, the course was something they decided on after trying out other disciplines in the College. NCAD students have the opportunity to participate in short introductory sessions to all the aspects of design, often resulting in career defining changes with more than one student taking the tremendous leap from Industrial Design to Fashion. Pleasantries are exchanged as we meet Barry, a Senior Sophister student. His first foray into fashion occurred when, at just twelve, he attended an Issey Miyake show in New York. Although he enjoyed the encounter,

he never considered a career in fashion until he experienced a change of heart in first year of College. Despite some eleventh hour decision making, the fashion students in NCAD are anything but indifferent when it comes to work. They fight hard to be admitted, and as a result, are willing to sacrifice their social lives, replacing these with up to 60 hours of study a week. In a course where hard work reigns supreme, it comes as no surprise to learn that the rewards to be reaped are extraordinary. Suzanne, a Junior Sophister, described last year’s field trip to Paris, during which they attend the Premier Vision fabric fair. Opportunities for work experience beyond the wildest dreams of most are plentiful, thanks to the College’s links with the European Union Leonardo scheme. One or two students from the 15-strong course are chosen for the chance to complete internships in EU countries. Barry was a successful candidate for the programme, getting the chance to work with Galliano for four months in Paris. Steve, another charismatic Senior Sophister, spent the summer working with All Saints in London – a name synonymous with young UK design talent. He felt it was a competitive environment but a positive one, the small team was brimming with fresh perspective and a crisp take on the old ideas. Barry sheds some light on the question of why such revered and established names are willing to lend a hand to the up-and-coming crop of Irish design students by explaining that the NCAD has traditionally churned out a collection of much more wearable designs than its outlandish competitors such as Central Saint Martins. In a college as diverse as NCAD, inspiration seems to lurk around every corner, but for these students, their creative awakening can be stirred by both the bizarre and the mundane. Stimulating materials are found everywhere from the beauty of a flower to old Batman and Robin episodes. When asked who

their favourite designers were, the sheer passion in their answers and knowledge the students have for their field is astounding, they cited unusual and international design references rather than the classic art school reply of “McQueen”. Suzanne looked to Japan for her influences: Junya Watanabe topped her list of luminaries, while Steve noted East End leading men Henry Holland and Gareth Pugh as his main inspirations. On top of their many commitments, the students are also taking part in “Lightwave”, a festival exploring light, to be held as part of the launch of Trinity Science Gallery in February. Installations, displays and interactive events will take place around the gallery and the city centre and it will incorporate work from some of the top lighting designers in the world. The NCAD students plan to work with a variety of fabrics for the event, ranging from LED encrusted materials to UV printed dresses, in an attempt to convey the intricacies of light in relation to art and design. Walking out of the design workshop, I envied the fashion students. Their absolute love of what they do, and the opportunities within their grasp amazed me, and defied all my expectations. They admit that staying in Dublin to establish a career in fashion is virtually impossible, but with their credentials after graduating from Ireland’s top design college, London, Paris and New York don’t seem that far away. It won’t be long until the fashion scene is littered by these homegrown talents and watch this space, our very own enfant terrible is about to arrive.


Old skool campus cool How do mature students handle the pressure when it comes down to the style stakes on campus? Words: Ciarán Durkan

T

he Arts Building is renowned for a certain je ne sais quoi, be it the dressed to kill (watch while I don’t break my ankle in spike heels on the cobbles) type, the trendy (I got it at a London flea market) type, the conservative/preppy-soon to be business person/librarian type, or the, how shall we say, rather more demonstratively attired individualrather less, in some cases. From personal experience, spending two years at one of Dublin Institute of Technology’s institutions, I know that this level of attention to detail is not found on every campus across the nation. As almost everyone walking through the Front Gate of Trinity knows, consciously or otherwise, there is a certain expectation they must live up to. The tradition of a somewhat more fashion-conscious campus perhaps belies Trinity’s illustrious, albeit somewhat elitist, history. And there must be some truth to the rumours of Trinity’s stylish youths, with top Irish stylists known to brave the cobbles to get inspiration on the hottest new trends and Irish newspapers having, on more than one occasion, photographed a welldressed fashionista in the Arts Building. Given the fact that the main part of the student body in Trinity is made up of the culturally aware youth in their early twenties, it is readily accepted that they will quickly adapt to their new surroundings. That is what people in the late stage of their formative years do: find individuality and personal style, which is part and parcel of what college life is about. But what of the much-forgotten demographic in the student population, the mature students? If you are somewhat past the impressionable age of the early twenties and have matured enough to avoid peer pressure, how are you going to deal with the fashion conscious and trendy youths who you now find yourself surrounded with? Vourneen, a student studying TSM English, aged 52 and single mother of two, is now in her Senior Sophister year.

She is not the kind of lady to be intimidated by others, but reveals that she did feel under pressure to alter her attire when coming to college. Vourneen moved to London in her early 20’s and was very fashion-forward as a youth. She still considers fashion top of her list of interests, but obviously being a student, coupled with her family responsibilities, she admitted to having tailored her wardrobe away from the business side of things and went in for a much more casual look. “It’s like power dressing in reverse”, she says, “I didn’t want to isolate myself from the students and tried to identify more with them”. Her biggest fear was been perceived as rich, overeducated and intimidating, which she thinks would have been the case had she dressed as she would have when working in finance. Liliane-Mayumi, aged 30, a Senior Sophister student studying languages, has been in Ireland for eleven years now. When she decided to come to Trinity to do her degree she had already formed an idea of the campus “style” from her colleagues and partner. In her case, coming from a less high-powered office environment, she was looking forward to dressing with more personal flair. For her it was a mixture of feeling older and seeing how the students around her dressed that made her realise she had a chance to experiment with fashion. She says that she wanted to avoid trying to look like some of the girls in their early twenties in the Arts Building, as there is always the issue of mutton and lamb, but this did not stop her from looking the part of a trendy young Trinity student. Having gone straight into the workplace at the age of twenty, finding herself surrounded by students a decade later has allowed her to orientate her wardrobe away from the dull smart-casual office wear and into brighter, more fashion forward styles, “College gave me the opportunity to dress the way I’ve always wanted.” Tom is a 64 year-old retired colonel for the Irish Defence Forces, also in his

Photo: Rachel Kennedy

P11FASHION

Senior Sophister year studying Art History and French. Although he has said that he has no interest in fashion, he did notice when arriving here nearly four years ago that there was a certain amount of the student population who dressed to impress. “It doesn’t work like that for men”, he replied to a question about whether he felt pressured into dressing a certain way. For him, after spending 42 years in uniform, the opportunity to wear whatever he liked was the main reason behind his student wardrobe. He always liked to be relaxed, in casual clothes like jeans and t-shirts. He does, however, admit that had he chosen the more formal suit-and-tie silhouette, worn by the majority of men his age, it would have created a distinct barrier between him and his new, younger peers. With over three years of wearing this new casual “uniform” he says that he may be more interested in his everyday style. He spoke of recently buying a coat which he thought of as very “contemporary”, and which he remarks he

would never have bought four years ago. Perhaps there is something to be said for these mature students coming out of a career, a comfort zone that they had been in for some time and into a wholly new surrounding, which brings with it a bewildering new set of peers. Both Tom and Vourneen commented on the fact that they found it very difficult at their age to know what to wear in this situation. It would be ridiculous for them to attempt to look like an eighteen year old again, but also difficult for them to interact with their fellow students and lecturers if they were dressed in the outfit they had come to see as suitable for their age-group. Whereas the age factor cannot be overcome, they did not want to create “more barriers than were already there” with their clothing choice. In most cases the students interviewed said that they chose to wear more casual clothes to college, but by a strange contradiction, some found that when they first arrived, there was a wish to revert to their previous style of clothing, “Sometimes I made the decision to wear a suit to College, and tell myself to act my age.” None of the mature students will admit to buckling under peer pressure, but the information gleaned from the interviews suggests that they were all conscious not only of their age, but also of the way they dressed. “At the end of the day we are students, regardless of the added ‘mature’ element, we should look the part”. After reflecting on this awhile, both Liliane and Vourneen agreed that perhaps it’s not such a bad thing; their new surroundings allow them to experiment, without feeling out of place or overdressed.


P13BOOKS Notebooks

Journals of Sylvia Plath, 1950-1962

Author: Tennessee Williams Price: €41.80 829pp. Publisher: Yale University Press Ranging across the author’s entire adult life (from an insecure young man in his mid-twenties to, well, an insecure old man in his seventies), Williams’ Notebooks are an unflinching record of the twentieth century’s most loved - and doubtlessly most successful playwright. The key decade - from 1945 to 1955 - in which Williams’ produced five of his best known works - takes up the majority of the journals, but the less academically-inclined reader will also find details of the author’s obsession with the cult of celebrity, his dependency on drugs and a frank account of the playwright’s sexual exploits. “Juicy” is not the word.

A Writer’s Diary

Author: Sylvia Plath

Author: Virginia Woolf

Price: €27.35 742pp.

Price: €13.30 372pp.

Publisher: Faber and Faber

Publisher: Harvest Books

Previously published in a much-vilified abridged edition in 1982, it is only in the years since the death of Plath’s equally-vilified husband Ted Hughes that these journals have appeared in a complete form, with every spelling and punctuation error gloriously intact. Roughly two-thirds of the material has never been seen before and the Plath who emerges is ruthlessly ambitious, fiercely loyal and painfully intense - in equal parts. Lest the reader feel cheated in a morbid way, Plath’s final two journals are missing (one lost, the other burned by Hughes), so any insight the reader might wish to gain into the poet’s suicide is a gesture made in vain.

Virginia Woolf is one of those rare authors for whom the term “prolific” is not simply a veiled euphemism for “popular” (and therefore “unsophisticated”, “unartistic” and even, let it be said, “vulgar”). A keen diarist for over twenty seven years, A Writer’s Diary represents an admirable distillation of Woolf’s notebooks and diaries by her faithful but oft-overshadowed husband Leonard. Prioritising extracts relating to Woolf’s reading matter, her thoughts on the writing process, and everyday scenes which provided the raw material for much of her work, this book provides a ready antidote for the reader from (often tedious) journals proper.

AUTHORPROFILE

DBC Pierre This Thursday, Booker Prize winner DBC Pierre visits Trinity's Literary Society. Rahul Bery profiles the author of Vernon God Little and Ludmilla's Broken English.

D

BC ("Dirty But Clean") Pierre, "Freak, dickhead, arsehole, dumb, farting machine, awkward and bumbling" Leitrim-Based MexicanBritish-Australian Booker Prize winner and author of Vernon God Little will be speaking for the Literary society on the 31st January. Coming to writing at a relatively late stage (the aforementioned novel, his debut, was brought to fruition before his fortieth birthday), his youth was spent gaining what some call 'life experience', including, amongst other activities, a quest to find the lost gold of the last Aztec emperor, Montezuma. And this

unorthodox education clearly paid off in the form of Vernon God Little, which, though he has written a second novel, Ludmilla's Broken English, continues to be his prize piece, at least until a third novel surfaces. It tells the story of a fifteen year old school boy, Vernon Gregory Little, stuck in a conservative Texan town named Martirio. His best friend, Jesus Navarro, decides to rid the world of all of his classmates before ridding the world of himself. (Un)fortunately Vernon, due to his chronic bowel problems, is defecating in the bushes at the time. As the sole survivor, he is immediately a suspect in the subsequent investigation. Pierre masterfully conjures up the

image of Middle America and their culture of the 'television as gospel'. In a world where 'celebrity' is the 6 o'clock news is the absolute truth, Vernon stands no chance and goes on the run into neighbouring Mexico. Often compared to Salinger's The Catcher in the Rye, the novel is also reminiscent of Camus's masterpiece, The Outsider. Like Mersault, Vernon refuses to 'play the game' that society demands. He naively believes that his innocence will be uncovered because "that's what happens in the movies". Once more, like Meursault, the refusal to enter into the society's 'game' results in the labelling of Vernon as a heartless monster, which the reader knows he

isn't. He's just another slightly screwed up teenager, in fact as sane as they come in the absurd world of Middle America. Outside of his work, Pierre has earned a reputation as a 'character', with a murky past and a reputation for hell-raising (during which he apparently amassed debts of £150,000, a third of which was paid back with his Booker Prize money) enhanced by a healthy dose of self mythologizing. His arrival at Trinity promises to be interesting, whether you are a fan or not. The Literary Society presents DBC Pierre, Thursday 31st January, Swift Theatre, Arts Block, 7p.m, all welcome.


P13BOOKS Notebooks

Journals of Sylvia Plath, 1950-1962

Author: Tennessee Williams Price: €41.80 829pp. Publisher: Yale University Press Ranging across the author’s entire adult life (from an insecure young man in his mid-twenties to, well, an insecure old man in his seventies), Williams’ Notebooks are an unflinching record of the twentieth century’s most loved - and doubtlessly most successful playwright. The key decade - from 1945 to 1955 - in which Williams’ produced five of his best known works - takes up the majority of the journals, but the less academically-inclined reader will also find details of the author’s obsession with the cult of celebrity, his dependency on drugs and a frank account of the playwright’s sexual exploits. “Juicy” is not the word.

A Writer’s Diary

Author: Sylvia Plath

Author: Virginia Woolf

Price: €27.35 742pp.

Price: €13.30 372pp.

Publisher: Faber and Faber

Publisher: Harvest Books

Previously published in a much-vilified abridged edition in 1982, it is only in the years since the death of Plath’s equally-vilified husband Ted Hughes that these journals have appeared in a complete form, with every spelling and punctuation error gloriously intact. Roughly two-thirds of the material has never been seen before and the Plath who emerges is ruthlessly ambitious, fiercely loyal and painfully intense - in equal parts. Lest the reader feel cheated in a morbid way, Plath’s final two journals are missing (one lost, the other burned by Hughes), so any insight the reader might wish to gain into the poet’s suicide is a gesture made in vain.

Virginia Woolf is one of those rare authors for whom the term “prolific” is not simply a veiled euphemism for “popular” (and therefore “unsophisticated”, “unartistic” and even, let it be said, “vulgar”). A keen diarist for over twenty seven years, A Writer’s Diary represents an admirable distillation of Woolf’s notebooks and diaries by her faithful but oft-overshadowed husband Leonard. Prioritising extracts relating to Woolf’s reading matter, her thoughts on the writing process, and everyday scenes which provided the raw material for much of her work, this book provides a ready antidote for the reader from (often tedious) journals proper.

AUTHORPROFILE

DBC Pierre This Thursday, Booker Prize winner DBC Pierre visits Trinity's Literary Society. Rahul Bery profiles the author of Vernon God Little and Ludmilla's Broken English.

D

BC ("Dirty But Clean") Pierre, "Freak, dickhead, arsehole, dumb, farting machine, awkward and bumbling" Leitrim-Based MexicanBritish-Australian Booker Prize winner and author of Vernon God Little will be speaking for the Literary society on the 31st January. Coming to writing at a relatively late stage (the aforementioned novel, his debut, was brought to fruition before his fortieth birthday), his youth was spent gaining what some call 'life experience', including, amongst other activities, a quest to find the lost gold of the last Aztec emperor, Montezuma. And this

unorthodox education clearly paid off in the form of Vernon God Little, which, though he has written a second novel, Ludmilla's Broken English, continues to be his prize piece, at least until a third novel surfaces. It tells the story of a fifteen year old school boy, Vernon Gregory Little, stuck in a conservative Texan town named Martirio. His best friend, Jesus Navarro, decides to rid the world of all of his classmates before ridding the world of himself. (Un)fortunately Vernon, due to his chronic bowel problems, is defecating in the bushes at the time. As the sole survivor, he is immediately a suspect in the subsequent investigation. Pierre masterfully conjures up the

image of Middle America and their culture of the 'television as gospel'. In a world where 'celebrity' is the 6 o'clock news is the absolute truth, Vernon stands no chance and goes on the run into neighbouring Mexico. Often compared to Salinger's The Catcher in the Rye, the novel is also reminiscent of Camus's masterpiece, The Outsider. Like Mersault, Vernon refuses to 'play the game' that society demands. He naively believes that his innocence will be uncovered because "that's what happens in the movies". Once more, like Meursault, the refusal to enter into the society's 'game' results in the labelling of Vernon as a heartless monster, which the reader knows he

isn't. He's just another slightly screwed up teenager, in fact as sane as they come in the absurd world of Middle America. Outside of his work, Pierre has earned a reputation as a 'character', with a murky past and a reputation for hell-raising (during which he apparently amassed debts of £150,000, a third of which was paid back with his Booker Prize money) enhanced by a healthy dose of self mythologizing. His arrival at Trinity promises to be interesting, whether you are a fan or not. The Literary Society presents DBC Pierre, Thursday 31st January, Swift Theatre, Arts Block, 7p.m, all welcome.


THEATREP14 INREVIEW

A Western without John Wayne Words: Frances Beatty

W

ritten, directed and composed by Richard Maxwell, Ode to the Man Who Kneels is a self-indulgent piece of experimental theatre which uses the Western genre to knit together a series of vignettes exploring the emotional life of its characters. It begins portentously with The Standing Man announcing the title of the play: a helpful introduction which allowed those who thought they had come to see a stage production of The Good, The Bad and The Ugly to make a quick exit. In the opening sequence, The Standing Man points gun-shaped fingers at The Kneeling Man. Faced with his imminent death, The Kneeling Man

INREVIEW

proceeds to give a lengthy monologue claiming that though he is portrayed as an actor, his feelings are real. There is the potential for intelligent reflection on the nature of performance, which Maxwell fails to develop. Instead the audience are left questioning the validity of drama that dictates emotion rather than evoking it. As much emotion, probably more, could be conveyed through an audio-recording with the added advantage that it could be switched off. In an absence of emotional truth, Maxwell’s relentless attempts to grapple with universal truths was futile. Characters ponder the difference between dreaming in black and white and dreaming in colour and say “profound”

The Recruiting Officer

T

things such as “Can you help me? I’m not sure I am who I say I am”. The entire cast indulge in these philosophical musings throughout and therefore they all come to perform the same function – to prove the cleverness of their creator. The play would have been no more smug had Maxwell himself stood on stage reading from his thought diary. Lest we forget Maxell’s third and final creative talent – that of composer – the segments of monologue and dialogue are interspersed by melancholy Western folk songs, the majority of which sound like variations on “Chopsticks”. It came as a relief to find that the cast could vary the pitch of their voices although, unfortunately, at least half of them genuinely could not sing.

he Abbey’s production of one of the last plays by George Farquar, the C17th playwright from Derry who attended Trinity, lacked the comic exuberance and pace required for an intricate Restoration-era plot full of disguises, forged letters, duels, soldiers and damsels. Despite valiant performances from most of the principals, Lynne Parker’s direction failed to fully invigorate this 300-year old comedy about the trials and errors of a recruiting officer (Garrett Lombard) and his suave captain Plume (Declan Conlon) as they search, respectively, for new army ensigns and love. The transposition of the play from its original setting in rural England to the wild countryside of the west of Ireland was an interesting choice and was cleverly realised in the set. Ferdia Murphy’s design contrasted a beautiful photograph by Ros Kavanagh of western bogs and distant mountains under a sublime sky (which functioned as the backdrop) with painted architecture, flying on and off the stage and folding out to make streets and houses with playful self-consciousness of theatrical artifice. The sense of one culture being imposed on a completely indifferent landscape was very strong and was an interesting pronouncement about Farquar’s

No doubt Maxwell was challenging our perceptions of being “in tune”, but it did, at times, feel as though the songs had been shoe-horned into the production as yet another testament to his ego. The sole aspect of the play in which Maxwell’s input proved effective was in one of his directorial decisions. A spotlight housed in a rickety wooden box in the front row of the auditorium fixes its wobbly light on the actors throughout the play, casting shadows of the characters on to the blank canvas screen behind the stage. This constant, sinister, shadowy presence created more ambience and said more about the human condition than either the actors or the script managed to convey.

relationship with England and sense of place. However, relocating the play in Ireland diminished the imminent sense of violence in warfare which pervades the soldiers’ language and might have given the play a darker and more complex dimension. Helene Montague’s score made a delightful accompaniment to the piece and it was refreshing to hear it played live by a small ensemble. Cathy Belton, who last excelled as Sonia in Uncle Vanya at The Gate, was an excellent, sparky Silvia, the belle of Captain Plume, who cross dresses to see what her lover is like as a soldier before she marries him. Miche Doherty, as Worthy’s rival Captain Brazen, showed brilliant comic timing and nuance; however, as Melinda, the object of the two mens’ love, Kathy Keira Clarke lacked comic flare. Why Parker did not endeavor to pace the production better remains a mystery. At three hours long, the play felt stretched, limited and mediocre. At two, it doubtless would have had a punchier impact. The themes of the play – the sexual corruption of the army, which brings chaos to whatever town they encamp in, finally put in check by marriage, were not complex enough to warrant such a drawn-out conclusion. Pollly Graham


Words: Polly Graham

Grace

through performance art

P15THEATRE

C

laire Butler, a Senior Sophister Drama student, decided to use theatre to communicate to her fellow students the significance of Grace Week. On the steps of the Chapel in Front Square, she and two other performers sat in silence for half an hour. Each figure bore an outward sign of their distance from others; one wore headphones, another’s mouth was gaffer taped shut, the third was blindfolded. Respectively the three figures held signs saying “Sorry for not hearing your cry”,“Sorry for not speaking out”,“Sorry for turning a blind eye”. To the side of this scene stood an intermediary figure between the performers and the audience, bearing another sign: “The name of Jesus has been tarnished by things done in his name”.

Claire was originally inspired by the idea of humanity only having one body in the eyes of God and how this ideal so often does not translate into our daily actions: “If a limb is suffering, we take action to heal it, but people, and the church so often block the suffering of others out.” “Drama is conflict”,Claire explains, “What we’re trying to do is acknowledge how we have failed to confront the truth of other people’s suffering. Throughout history, the church has failed people, sometimes through action, sometimes through inaction. It is our error which makes us need God’s grace.” A sense of conflict and inbuilt tension was at the heart of this performance. The stillness of the three figures was striking and challenging. Claire says that, “As a performer, you re-

alize how difficult it is to stay still on stage for half an hour, how terrifying to be blindfold and to know people are scrutinizing you.” In terms of the audience, this stillness captured people’s attention because it strongly contrasted with the usual pace of life that rushes through Front Square and allowed the audience space and time to consider the ideas of distance between human beings and our collective insufficiency in the face of suffering. How we respond to this message is a personal choice, of course, but as a tool for communication, Claire proved the theatre to be potent. “Perhaps it’s performance art rather than theatre, no one moves or speaks and there’s a kind of symmetry and aesthetic in the arrangement of the figures.”

INREVIEW

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taging a play dealing with autism was a brave move for director Chris Collins and Find Me proved to be a strong work. The trauma of Verity and her family was handled capably by a solid cast who swapped characters as dextrously as they twirled chairs across the half-lit stage, and Collins’ use of sound, animation and movement left a powerful impression of distress. However, although his artistic depersonalisation and

decontextualisation of Verity’s life was impressive, it sat uncomfortably with the play’s representation of an outdated incomprehension and fear of autism and especially the message that everything would be better if only there were proper facilities in which to contain autistic children. The play’s overwhelming nightmarish atmosphere was also unhelpfully ambiguous: was it an expression of Verity’s pain or that of her family? At times, the effect was that of a

horror movie about demonic possession, while Verity herself was given little direct attention and remained distant in spite of the play’s title. Find Me’s strongest scene was its least distressing. It was simultaneously hilarious and painful to watch Laura Nixon’s Verity drive her family mad during a disastrous lunch in France. In an otherwise gruelling play, it was humour that induced the greatest empathy. Dominic Esler

Find Me


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Turning n your T*Art Trinity Arts Festival 2008

he Trinity Arts Festival stands alone as Ireland’s only students’ arts festival. TAF is a non-profit event and we are proud to say the students, for the students, run it all! Every year, the TAF brings together the best art, music and fun that Trinity College and Dublin can offer. Through a week of events, both day and night, TAF seeks to bring some art and cultural creativity to College, even if only for a week! However, please remember that TAF is about art-happy-fun not revolution. Launch night for Trinity Arts Festival kicks off the week before, Wednesday 6 February, with Neosupervital Live and Space Camp DJs at The Button Factory. The Trinity Arts Fest, now in its third year, has been a huge success with its modus operandi to unite the arts of Trinity College and we know no better way than to kick it all of with an epic opening party!!! Neosupervital have been busy building a name for themselves over the last few years. The band consists of front man Tim Vital, Jessie Love Action, Miss K and DancinVin, and in addition to some fairly wild (and frankly envious) names, they’ve also got a scandalous amount of talent! They’ve played festivals such as Oxegen, Castlepalooza and Electric Picnic in 2007, been played on MTV2 and brought their live show around the UK and Europe as guests of The Human League in December 2006. Described by many as Ireland's answer to Hot Chip or LCD Soundsystem, Neosupervital could possibly more accurately be described as a mixing of elements from the Beach Boys and The Human League to create fun, funky, smart and danceable electronic pop music. See how much TAF loves you! But that’s not all, oh no! To spoil you kiddies altogether, Neosupervital will then be followed by the sensational Space Camp Dj’s. Space Camp is one of the Dublin's most successful and diverse nights out, with guests ranging from Bill Brewster, Dancepig, Joakim (With Shock) I:Cube, *In Fligranti (With Shock), Prins Thomas, Reverso 68, Pilooski, Shit Robot and Todd Terje. The guys have a talent of knowing when to keep the music down-tempo and when the party needs an injection of something more diverse and high octane. Expect the guys to surprise and entertain, see you on the dance floor! Now honestly, I’d TAF that…! The celebrations continue with our “I Want to Score” Night in the SugarClub, on Tuesday 12. Sexy name, one hell of a venue! Featuring some amazing, eclectic and inventive silent films made by the talented Dublin University Film-makers. These are aired alongside a host of sensational musical pieces by


P17ART mark on TAF 2008! Plus, what better excuse is there to avoid the library for an extra fifteen minutes? Cup of tea and a bit of art?! We are all T*Arts at Heart after all… As well as thee events, we will be running workshops throughout the week, ranging in everything from mask making, make-up, clothes customising and African drumming so drop in and join in! Keep an eye out for event posters and keep up to date on what will be going on. You’ll see us, hear us and maybe even love us. This is Art for T*Arts Sake!

TAF: Abb. 1. Adj.: Fun and frolicking involving everything arty. 2. Noun: Week of art-tastic events from the 11 – 15 February. 3. Verb: to TAF: to unite the societies of Trinity in arty endeavours. You may not know much about art, but by the end of February, maybe even this section, you will love TAF.

Words: Katarzyna Murphy and Caroline O’Leary

a variety of musicians, a comedy sketch by the acclaimed Mercer Island Rodeo (described as fresher than the morning dew, faster than a really fast child and packed to the gills with funny stuff), all crammed into one night, and followed by a DJ set, which is going to make one impressive party! Sold out event last year, so let’s do it again! Nighttime acivities are only the tip of the iceberg, with the real artistic substance of the festival taking place all day, everyday for the duration of the week. The most prestigious of these is the Architectural Association of Ireland exhibition taking place throughout the week. The IAA has been supplying annual awards for architectural excellence for more than twenty years and we at TAF have organised an exhibition of the submission pieces made for the 2007 AAI competition. The exhibition will be made up of 40 A1 size boards designed with a variety of elevations, plans, sketches and a host of images alluding to the creative and complex processing of ideas that unite to form a coherent architectural design. TAF provides a distinct and unique platform to merge a variety of the college’s art disciplines, regardless of faculty, and in turn raises awareness of the range of artistic and architectural initiatives that are run around the country. Having such a prestigious and rare collection of such pieces here on our doorstep for the week is a true testament to the endeavours of TAF. In addition to the week’s fantastic kaleidoscope of artsy and architectural events, we will also be running our stimulating Architectural tours of Front Arch, New Square and the library buildings. We hope you enjoy. Our other major arty fixture for the week is Campus Canvas; Boys and girls, grab your paintbrushes and get creative! All day, every day for the whole week of the festival (repeat after me 11-15), we will have a range of multisized canvas propped up in both the Hamilton and Arts Building for you to paint anything you want-make your

FOR YOUR CALENDAR Monday 11 February • All Day: Campus Canvas in the Arts Building and the Hamilton • 1pm – 2pm: Costume Customising in the Arts Workshop • 7:30pm – 9:30pm: Dance Workshop in Regent House • 7pm: Opening Night in the Atrium with music by Co CoPhOnE, visuals by the Dublin University Visual Arts Society, art work by the Trinity Arts Workshop and Dublin University Photographic Association and a live interactive audiovisual installation by Roberto Pugliese followed by afterparty in the Bleu Note Bar, Camden St, featuring music from the Dublin University Jazz Society. Tuesday 12 February • All Day: Campus Canvas in the Arts Building and the Hamilton • 12pm – 1pm: Tour of the Provost’s House with Dr. Eddie McParland • 1pm – 2pm: Drumming Workshop with the Trinity College Dublin Afro-Caribbean Society in the JCR • 2-3pm: Make-up for Film Workshop, TAW Studios. • 2:30pm – 3:30pm: Architectural Tour of the Berkeley Library with Ms. Ellen Rowley • Mask-making Workshop, TAW Studios. • 8pm: “I Want to Score” with Dublin Univesity Filmmakers, the acclaimed Mercer Island Rodeo, followed by Mark Hughes DJ set in the Sugar Club, Leeson Street Wednesday 13 February • All Day: Campus Canvas in the Arts Building and the Hamilton • 1pm – 2pm: Beat-Boxing Workshop in the JCR • T*Art Attack in Front Square • Architectural Tour of the East End • 12-2pm: Camera Obscura in Regent House • 2-3pm: Make-up for Film Workshop, TAW Studios. • Dublin University Orchestral Society performance, “Nutcracker Suite”, the Chapel Thursday 14 February • All Day: Campus Canvas in the Arts Building and the Hamilton • Capoiera Workshop • Pollock Painting in Hamilton Green (or the Arts Workshop) • 12pm – 1pm: Tour of the Provost’s House with Dr. Eddie McParland • 4pm – 5pm: Graffiti Art Workshop with Aran Young in the Arts Workshop • 6pm – 7pm: String Octet Performance of “Strings in E Flat Major” by Felix Mendelssohn in the Chapel. Friday 15th February • All Day: Campus Canvas in the Arts Building and the Hamilton • 2:30pm – 3:30pm: Tour of the Libraries with Ms. Ellen Rowley • 5pm – 6pm: Learning is Fun • Drum & Bass Workshop with David Knight • 6pm – 7pm: Dublin University Orchestral Society performance “Nutcracker Suite”, the Chapel • Stephen Mulhall “Educating Rita” Installation • Architectural Association of Ireland travelling exhibition – will run all week. Timetable is subject to change.


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Lemon 60 Dawson Street, Dublin 2 / 66 South William Street, Dublin 2

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Flop! It’s almost Shrove Tuesday A guide to making the best pancakes in town. Words: Beth Armstrong

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ancake Tuesday marks a last day of excesses before Lent begins. Also called Shrove Tuesday, the original aim of the day was to use up rich ingredients such as eggs, milk and sugar before Lent fasting would begin. However, with those ingredients now part of everyday consumption, Pancake Tuesday has deviated from its traditional liturgical past and is now a day to eat, make and toss these delicious creations to your hearts content. You may prefer the thin French crepe to the fat American breakfast pancake, but there is no denying that when eaten with a variety of toppings, savoury or sweet, they are superb. To make your own pancakes this coming Pancake Tuesday, your shopping list should include plain flour, salt, eggs, milk and butter. These ingredients are essential for the thin, French crepe. However, if its American style pancakes you want, you should also buy baking

powder. Also buy whatever toppings you want to serve with your pancakes lemons, sugar, chocolate, fruit… the list is endless. You should also be in possession of a frying pan, a whisk and a palette knife (or something similar.) Now you have your ingredients assembled, the time to create your pancake mix has arrived. Add 110g of plain flour and a pinch of salt to a large bowl (with 1 teaspoon of baking powder if you‘re after American style pancakes) If you don’t have a mixing bowl, you can use a pot. Make a well in the centre of the flour and add two eggs. Then mix 200ml of milk with 75 ml of water. Begin whisking the eggs and add your watermilk mixture slowly as you whisk. Add 50 grams of melted butter to your mixture and it is complete. If you are overly impatient, it is possible to get straight into cooking your pancakes, but it is best to leave the mixture in the fridge for an hour or two so it can set. When ready to cook, add some

butter to your frying pan and wait for it to get really hot. Drop a spoonful or two of batter (depending on the size of your frying pan) into the pan and tip the pan from side to side so it is evenly coated with batter. After a minute of so, use a palate knife to flip the pancake over onto the uncooked side. When both sides are cooked through, toss in the air to your hearts desire. Be warned, though, the first pancake made is usually rubbish, so it might be best to toss it into the bin. Continue making and tossing pancakes until your batter is used up and serve with as many toppings as you can muster… apple and cinnamon is delicious, as is banana and chocolate. The traditional pancake is served with lemon and sugar. You could also be adventurous and add Grand Marnier liqueur for a Crepe Suzette or else chose a savoury filling such as ham and cheese or bacon and egg. Most importantly, enjoy.

f you don’t have time to make your own pancakes this coming Pancake Tuesday, instead head to Lemon Crepe and Coffee Co, a short stroll from the Arts Building on Dawson Street and also situated on South William Street if you fancy a longer stroll. Lemon is the home of pancakes in Dublin. The Dawson Street branch is a favourite amongst Trinity students and with its delicious menu, it is obvious why. On offer are sweet and savoury pancakes, hot sandwiches, waffles and a full menu of hot and alcoholic drinks -with the coffees regularly touted as the best in town. Sitting down among the Trinity masses, I perused the large blackboard style menu. Although many are wary of the idea of a savoury crepe, thinking pancakes are for dessert purposes only, I can reassure. I opted for the Club Crepe, a pancake with streaky bacon, roast chicken breast, tomato, iceberg lettuce and mayo, at a cost of 6.75 euros and it was delicious. My fellow Lemon addict opted, controversially, not for a crepe, but for a hot bacon sandwich, costing 5.35 euros. This was not an ordinary toastie, however. Cooked on the hot plate to a golden crispy texture and served with Ballymaloe relish, it was described as being out of this world. Despite a carb overload, we decided to split a dessert. We opted for the Choc Ice, with melted milk Belgium chocolate buttons and vanilla icecream costing 6.30 euros. Halving it was perfect. It was so rich, illness would have been the only possible result of a whole one each! It was the perfect end to a scrumptious meal. Despite the excellence of the food, it must be noted that Lemon is pricey. One way to avoid the cost is to order to takeaway, as the prices are up to 1 euro less expensive. You should also be warned that the open style, cafeteria seating means that private conversations are a no-no! It does fill up quickly at lunch and on Pancake Tuesday has notorious queues. So, go at an off-peak time and munch away!


Rachel Allen reveals all Rachel Allen, the Irish chef du jour and part of the famous Ballymaloe dynasty appears on numerous cookery programmes shown as far afield as Australia and Africa, and also produces cookbooks by the dozen. Beth Armstrong caught up with her, asking her how student cooking on a budget can be adventurous and tasty without breaking the bank.

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achel Allen began her career as a chef by pretending to be Delia Smith, baking biscuits with her sister while growing up in Dublin. After an education at Ballymaloe House, Ireland’s premiere cookery academy, the prolific “Irish Cookery Queen” (as deemed by the BBC) became a tour de force, and ended up teaching her teachers at the cookery school. Her star continued to rise, and ultimately she was courted by both RTÉ and the BBC, resulting in numerous televisions programmes and a collection of cookery books, such as Rachel’s Favourite Food and the recently published Rachel’s Food for Living. In the wake of the campaigns to improve school food, it has never been such a good time to ask this world-renowned chef how student cookery can be improved. Despite many students being packed off to college with a plethora of cooking utensils and various cookbooks packed by anxious parents, it is the truth that we live on certain staples, be they the often-cited examples of beans and pasta or an oven pizza from Spar. However, help is at hand. Allen’s aim in cooking has always been to produce great results with simple ingredients, and as such, her recipes are ideal for student cooking. She empathises with the fact that students are on a tight budget and that it is often tricky to find the time to make a decent meal. However, she believes that “you cannot beat homemade soup”, which is “seasonal, cheap and really good!”. Her recipe for Spanish Chickpea and Chorizo soup, which she describes as being “a comforting soup for a rainy day”, with flavours reminiscent of summer, is produced below. In stocking a student store cupboard, she believes the essentials are simple… (potatoes, onions, garlic, pulses and beans) and can be used as the basis for delicious soups and salads. When cooking for more than one on a budget, say for a dinner party or the like, Allen believes that it is possible to produce delicious food without hurting the bank balance and she says “A lovely stew is always good and nutritious and does not have to be expensive, as stewing cuts of meat are actually cheaper than prime cuts of meat like the fillet and sirloin”. Her recipe for lamb

stew, with pot barley, red onions, celery and garlic is cheap, quick and is Spanish Chori zo Soup produced below. She also recomA comforting so up fo r a rainy day - m mends cooking in bulk and reheatcan be reheated akes 4-6 servin . gs, which ing food throughout the week as an easy time-saving option, noting Ingredients: that her recipe for Spanish soup 1 tbsp olive oil reheats well, with the flavours ac110g / 4 oz chor izo , diced tually improving. 1 onion , finely ch opped So, bar a microwave (for re2 celery stalks , fin ely chopped heating purposes), what cooking 2 cloves of crus he d or grated garl equipment does she class as es1 x 410g / 14oz ic tin of chickpeas sential? Well, apparently not 2 tins of choppe d tomatoes (o much equipment is needed to r 8 fresh ripe to peeled and chop matoes, ped) cook well, with only one or two 1 litre / nearly 2 pi nt s chicken stock sharp knives, a wooden chopSalt and pepper ping board and a frying pan 110g / 4oz spin ach , destalked needed to create gourmet reand finely chop spinach leaves ped (or baby le ft whole) sults! However, she does say that if you get your hands on a Method: spare 25 euros, a great investPlace the olive oil in a large sa ment is a Microplane Grater. ucepan on the the diced chor heat and add iz o. Cook for a m Allowing for the quick and inute or two un chorizo releases til the its oils then ad easy grating of flavourings d the chopped and garlic. Coo on k ion, celery on a ge ntle heat, with such as garlic, lime and lemon saucepan until the lid on the th e on io n is completely co zest, ginger and hard cheeses, minutes). Add oked (about 10 the chickpeas (a allowing remarkable tastes to nd all the liquid) tomatoes (and and the all the liquid) an be easily added to your d the stock. Se and pepper an as on with salt d br in g to the boil. Simmer dishes. utes until the to for about 20 m m at oe s inare soft and th This food guru, who deleased all their e chickpeas ha fla vo ve ur s. re Ta ste for seasonin scribes her food heaven as salt or pepper g and add mor if it is necessar e “lobster… and lots of it”, y. With the mix add the spinac ture still boiling h. Cook for ab believes that on a student out a minute un is just soft. Serv til the spinach e in a big, warm budget, you can produce ed bowl. Pasta be added to th or is Rice can to m ak e a more substant nutritious and delicious ial meal. foods quickly and at a low cost. Don’t believe it? Try her recipes for yourself…

Photo: Peter Rowen/Dubliner Magazine

P19EDIBLES


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Snazzy dresser, will sing. Dear Mrs Fix-It, t shoes, I’m a well-dressed boy with excellen hang I wit. arp excellent hair and razor-sh ’re they l, wel e, out mostly with boys becaus I en wom Any . easier to make friends with I’m e aus bec know all think I’m amazing girls kind and give great advice. Thing is, e don I e hav at never want to date me. Wh wrong? Confusedly, Anton

H T

Dominating an interview Dear Mrs Fix-It, I had an interview last Friday. It went really well except the in terviewer kept look in g at me weirdly, like he wa nted to ask me so mething but couldn’t bring himself to do it. I’v e just found out that on e of the things that prospective empl oyers do is look at someone’s Facebook page. O n my page, my in terests include: Men, Hor se-Riding and Be ing in Charge. My worr y now is that my new boss with think I’m just a wanton dominat rix, when in fact, I’m just a sporty bossy girl. Help? Worriedly, Barbar a

Dear Barbara, Dear Anton, A sporty bossy girl is a dominatrix, exce Are you currently a member of a pt with be tte r clothes and more a in n bee r eve you accessories. I think e Hav d? Boyban co you uld definitely turn this to your advant Boyband? You seem the perfect age. In ve st in so m e e styl leather jodhpurs an candidate: You’ve got the hair, the d practise your sneer. It’ll get you the Try . ality far. sexu le nab stio que and the ng following- can you recite the followi e plet lines by One True Voice with com way sincerity “If I had Shakespeare’s with words/ I’d write you a sonnet/ Put your name upon it”. Did you manage? Great. Give Louis a bell, he’ll set Dear Mrs Fix-It, it? lestones. Is it worth you up. High heels on cobb Gemma.

ty? High and migh

Dear Gemma, ning ankle. have but one functio to er ef pr u yo if y Onl

Have you got problems of your own that need fixing? Email Mrs Fixit at mrs.fixit@trinitynews.ie

Competition: Los Campesinos In Music, TN2 interviewed the the fantastic Los Campesinos! and we have two pairs to give away, simply answer this question: On what page of TN2 did Los Campesinos! feature? Answers to: tn2@trinitynews.ie. First two correct answers win a pair each!

xkcd.com

no.355

“A somewhat surprising contender for our blemish banisher was nannies’ favourite Sudocream.” FASHION P10

Mrs Fixit

Duvet Days: A real fire, a DVD box set, and a lectire missed. In a word: Heaven

Celebrity Babies: Christina Aguilera’s Max Liron. Nicole Richie’s Winter Harlow. Mathew Mc Conaughey’s girlfriend is pregnant. Hollywood’s never been so maternal.

Arts Block Bingo: Did you spot that guy that always wears red jeans? He’ll score you ten points.

Charity Collections: Love, I can barely afford lunch, let alone setting up a monthly standing order.

Blue Monday: There was a reason last Monday was so dire. 21 January: officially the most depressing day of the year.

Competitive exercising: When did the gym turn into Beyond Thunderdome

N T


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