PRICELE$$ October 2011
Inspiring Parents, Motivating Kids, Celebrating Life
Laying Down the Law
Developing Potential
Dave Says Kaelynne Dougherty
Events & Happenings
Bad News for Bullies www.WiseFamilyMagazine.com
& T E U O H E NT M R E O GE! A TE T M RID PU F
Upcoming Events & Happenings of Interest
GREENWOOD FALL FESTIVAL October 8 9:00 am - 2:00 pm You’ll enjoy a parade beginning at 10 a.m., and immediately following the parade, handcrafted arts and craft booths will be open. Featured activities will be children’s train rides, food and game booths and door prizes. Greenwood is a short, scenic drive out of Decatur. Go north on Farm Road 51 for 10 miles to Farm Road 1204, then turn left and travel approximately five miles into the community of Greenwood. Contact: (940) 627-3341 SARAH’S CURE 5K & KIDS K FUN RUN October 8 8:00 am -Kids 1K Fun Run Start 8:30 am - 5K Fun Run Start This is for runners and walkers of all ages and fitness levels.The Start/Finish Line will be at the historical Decatur Courthouse. The run will go through the streets of downtown Decatur. There will be water and fruit provided for all runners. Awards will be given to the top 3 runners in each age group and all Kids K participants will receive an award. Contact: (817) 832-7998 6th Annual sarah’s cure October 8 5:30 pm CThe concert and silent auction will be held at Bono’s Chop House & Saloon in Decatur, TX. This year’s event features Johnny Lee, Jason Boland & The Stragglers, and much more. Proceeds from this benefit will go directly towards research and finding a treatment or cure for Galactosemia via Galactosemic Families of the Southern States (GFSS) www.galactosemiasupport.org, a 501(c)3 non-profit organization. Bono’s Chop House & Saloon 2025 N U.S HWY 287 Decatur, TX 76234 Contact: (817) 832-7998
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THE GREENWOOD-SLIDELL VOLUNTEER FIRE DEPT. ANNUAL FISH FRY October 8 5:00 pm Annual Fish Fry Fundraiser held on the 2nd Saturday of October each year. Come join us! Station 2: Greenwood Texas 130 CR 2640 Decatur, TX 76234 Contact: (940) 466-9634 Newark Cruisin’ Days October 14 - 6:00 pm October 15 - 10:00 am October 16 - 12:00 pm - 6:00 pm This year the fun will begin on Friday with Carnival & Midway. Saturday will be the parade, vendor and craft booth spaces, bingo, games, food, and more rides. And Sunday we will wrap things up with the Carnival & Midway. Newark Fire Department 310 FM Road 718 Newark, Texas 76071 Contact: (817) 489-2201 Annual auctionchamber of commerce “post time in decatur” October 15 Doors open at 5:00 pm, activities begin at 6:00 pm. Decatur Civic Center Bridgeport, TX 76426 Contact: (940) 627-3107 Bridgeport City wide garage sale October 15 Bridgeport, TX 76426 Contact: (940) 683-2076 chicofest October 15 Games, food, craft booths, music, Mr. Chico contest, bbq lunch, bingo, and a whole lot of fun! Chico Square Chico, TX 76431 Contact: (940) 644-0003
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Painting downtown pink 2011 October 21 Decatur Square Decatur, TX 76234 Contact: (940) 627-3107 decatur junior women’s club 20th annual “Park classic” Golf tournament October 21 Registration and lunch at 11:00 am; Tee off at 12:00 pm Decatur Country Club 211 Country Club Rd Decatur, TX 76234 Chisholm trail steak challenge October 22 12:00 pm - 12:00 am Think you can grill the best steak on the Chisholm Trail? Festivities begin with an appetizer and dessert showdown and end with the steak challenge. Judges will gather from all around to decide and fesitval goers will have the chance to sample and choose the chef of their choice to grill their steak! First place prize will receive $2,500! Second prize - $1,000! Third prize - $350! Bands, beer gardens, vendors and festivities for free. Wise County Reunion Grounds 3101 S FM 51 Decatur, TX 76234 Contact: (214) 683-1766 annual fall farm equipment consignment auction October 29 9:00 am Auction is being organized by the Chisholm Trail Tractor Club. No Buyers premium; equipment will begin being taken in for the auction on Sat., Oct. 15th. This auction will include good clean farm and industrial equipment. Consign early to be included in advertisements. For consignment info. contact Grady Griffith (940) 393-2155 or David Cole (817) 821-3583. Wise County Posse Grounds 3101 S FM 51 Decatur, TX 76234
CHOICES Pregnancy Resource Center • Free Pregnancy Tests & Limited Ultrasounds • Post-Abortion Education & Support • Resources for Babies • Community Referrals • Peer Counseling
Evelyn Danae, daughter of Gerardo and Maria Fernandez.
A baby has a special way of adding joy in every day. Author Unkown Readers…
Send your photos of friends, family and events to pics@wisefamilymagazine.com!
Empowering women to make life affirming choices 604 N. Trinity, Decatur P.O. Box 875, Decatur, TX 76234 Office: Español: Text: Fax:
940-627-6924 940-627-9662 940-391-7572 940-627-0793
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The Family Album
Decatur Eagle 3rd grade football players.
Fun Fact: It is impossible to hum if your nose is plugged. Keeping cool in a truck bed pool!
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With Love, Naturally
Broken Water Insurance
K
atie’s first baby was due in about two weeks. Surprisingly, her water broke at 5:30am but no contractions followed. Per her doctor’s orders, she went to the hospital where she was put on Pitocin to start labor. Her body wasn’t ready so labor was long and tiring. Twenty seven hours later, she gave birth to her son. I must admit, when I was pregnant with my first baby, I wanted my water to break so I’d know for sure that labor had started. Little did I know there is no mistaking true labor once it happens and it’s okay not to rush off to the hospital when it’s so early there is still a question of “is this real labor?” Unlike when I was born 35 years ago, doctors now prefer mom to deliver within 24 hours of the water breaking. Occasionally, the water can break days before contractions come. Sometimes the water breaks before the body is ready to go into labor, making an induction necessary. Premature rupture of membranes happens so early the baby is at risk of being born too soon. Since inductions are known to increase the Cesarean Section risk dramatically and no one wants a baby to be born prematurely, what can we do to keep the water from breaking early? Most importantly, an excellent diet builds a strong, healthy baby and amniotic sac. As a matter of fact, most issues in pregnancy can be traced back to mom’s diet—even her chance of tearing during delivery is reduced if her skin and tissue cells are nourished by nutritious foods! An extra boost is Vitamin C with bioflavonoids. Vitamin C strengthens the body’s collagen and therefore the amniotic sac as well. Bioflavonoids are thought to help the body absorb and use Vitamin C more efficiently. A 2005 National Institute of Perinatology study showed 100mg of Vitamin C daily after 20 weeks helped protect against premature rupture of membranes. Buy a good source of Vitamin C, preferably from a reputable health food store, not a chain discount store. ■ Wendy Fowler
Wendy Fowler is a Certified Doula (Professional Childbirth Coach) and Childbirth Educator with a passion for helping young families thrive. She is a Texas Woman’s University graduate with a degree in Family Studies, but she gets most of her experience in the trenches raising five daughters out in the country with her husband Shane. For more information on the services she offers, visit her website at www.doulawendy.com.
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On The Cover: October, 2011 In our 7th year of ‘Making A Difference’
Kaelynne Dougherty enjoying her time on the family farm in Kansas.
P.O. Box 521 • Boyd, Texas 76023
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In This Issue: Founder: Kim Tinkham 1957 - 2010
Publisher & Parent Company . . . . . . . . . . . TinkInkPublications.com Editor . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Scott@tinkinkpublications.com Graphic Artist . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Sara Sparrowgrove Email . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . sara@tinkinkpublications.com Sales Guy & Future Editor . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Taylor Ponder Distribution Guys . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Scott and Don Tinkham Office Dogs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Max and Buddy Our Reason For Doing This . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . YOU! Advertising Sales . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ads@wisefamilymagazine.com To submit: Information . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . info@wisefamilymagazine.com Photographs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . pics@wisefamilymagazine.com Wise Family Magazine is published monthly by Tink Ink LLC and distributed free of charge through local merchants. Wise Family Magazine reserves the right to edit, reject or comment editorially on all material contributed. Opinions expressed by the contributors are not necessarily the opinions of the publication. Tink Ink LLC assumes no liability or responsibility for any claims made by advertisers in the magazine. Reproduction in whole or part without express written consent of the Publisher is prohibited.
EMERGENCY NUMBERS: Wise County Sheriff . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 940 627 5971 Severe Weather Updates . . . . . . . . . www.weather.com Emergency Preparedness Info . . . . . www.redcross.org www.MissingKids.com . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1-800-843-5678 National Child Abuse Hotline . . . . . . . . 1-800-422-4453 National Poison Control Center . . . . . . . 1-800-222-1222 National Substance Abuse Hotline . . . 1-800-662-4357 National Runaway Hotline . . . . . . . . . . . 1-800-786-2929
You can pick us up from here and take us home… 6
Dear Readers . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7 Dave Says . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8-9 Women’s Occupational Workshop . . . . . . 10 With Love, Naturally . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12 Wise County Wonderings . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14 Laying Down the Law . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15 Life Skills . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18 Bad News For Bullies . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19 Wise Merchants . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22
BE A PART OF OUR NEXT ISSUE! Proud of your child, team or association? Want to share a picture with the rest of the county? Send your high resolution color picture with caption to
pics@WiseFamilyMagazine.com Find Doright in the magazine (it’s not easy), email us at Contest@wisefamilymagazine.com. You will be entered in a drawing for a prize. Proudly sponsored by our Decatur “Do Right and Fear No Man”
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Grocery stores, Fred’s, Chili’s, Wal-mart, Pizza Hut, Dos Chiles, Starbucks, Plaza Cinema IV Movie Theatre, Wise Regional Hospital, North Texas Community Hospital and many more places throughout our great county! Thank you!
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Twenty years from now... by Scott Tinkham
“That some achieve great success, is proof to all that others can achieve it as well.” ~Abraham Lincoln~
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s I get older and I look back on my life I remember my life in twenty year increments. Your first 20 years seem like an eternity. When you’re a kid you want to hurry up and get older which of course makes the world slow down. My second 20 years moved really quickly because I was busy. Graduated collage, feel in love, got married, had a kid, started a career. Now I’m in the middle of my third 20 years and I think back to when my dad said “you know you should plant a bunch of pecan trees on your property” and I thought what for it will take 20 years for them to get big enough to enjoy them. Man I wish I planted them trees 20 years ago. Mark Twain said, “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” I guess what I’m trying to say is as I get older and I hope wiser I’ve noticed 20 years is not that long and I’m going to try and head the words of Mr. Twain and not be disappointed by the things I didn’t do. You know they say the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago, the second best time is now. “Did you ever see an unhappy horse? Did you ever see bird that had the blues? One reason why birds and horses are not unhappy is because they are not trying to impress other birds and horses.” ~Dale Carnegie~ “Happiness is the only good. The time to be happy is now. The place to be happy is here. The way to be happy is to make others so.” ~Robert G. Ingersoll~
“A determined person will do more with a pen and paper, than a lazy person will accomplish with a personal computer.” ~Catherine Pulsifer~ “If not us, who? If not now, when?” ~Kennedy, John F.~ “Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.” ~John Quincy Adams~ “Dream as if you’ll live forever. Live as if you’ll die tomorrow.” ~James Dean~ “If you’re going to be thinking, you may as well think big.” ~Donald Trump~ “So long as there is breath in me, that long I will persist. For now I know one of the greatest principles on success; if I persist long enough I will win.” ~Og Mandino~ “Desire is the starting point of all achievement, not a hope, not a wish, but a keen pulsating desire which transcends everything.” ~Napoleon Hill~ “Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson~ “Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.” ~Dale Carnegie~ “All our dreams can come true - if we have the courage to pursue them.” ~Walt Disney~
“Never be satisfied with what you achieve, because it all pales in comparison with what you are capable of doing in the future.” ~Rabbi Nochem Kaplan~ “The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” ~Winston Churchill~ If you really want your life to change, to have all that you want, then here are a few books with the mentality of action. If you pick up a great idea, use it right away even if you’re not done with the book. Any of these motivational books can have the power to change your life or at least motivate and inspire you to take action. You can also get them as gifts. 1. Unlimited Power by Anthony Robbins 2. Awaken the Giant Within by Anthony Robbins 3. The Millionaire Mind by Thomas Stanley 4. Secrets of the Millionaire Mind by T. Harv Eker 5. Your Best Life Now by Joel Osteen 6. The Magic of Thinking Big by David Schwartz, Ph.D. 7. Quantum Success by Sandra Taylor 8. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey For teenagers, I highly recommend The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective Teens by Sean Covey, Stephen’s son. 9. As a Man Thinketh by James Allen 10. Think and Grow Rich by Napolean Hill 11. How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie 12. The Magic of Believing by Claude M. Bristol 13. Maximum Achievement by Brian Tracy 14. The Greatest Salesman in the World by Og Mandino 15. Year to Success by Bo Bennet 16. Self-Discipline in 10 Days by Theodore Bryant 17. The Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale
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Dave Says
Why not grow the IRA’s?
Dear Dave, My wife and I have been following the Baby Steps, and we’ve paid off all of our credit card debt. We still have $51,000 in student loans left, and our combined income is about $140,000. We’re thinking about funding our IRAs while we finish off the college loans. How do you feel about this? - Patrick Dear Patrick, I wouldn’t do it that way. If you’re still on Baby Step 2, you need to stop all saving and investing and attack that last piece of debt with a vengeance. I know what you’re going through. The problem with student loans is that, like yours, they’re usually pretty big, and sometimes it’s difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Even with all the work you’ve done so far, a debt that large can make you feel hopeless. But there’s only one way to take down a giant. You start gnawing at his ankles and work your way up. That’s what you need to do, Patrick. I’m afraid you’ll lose focus and intensity when it comes to getting out of debt if you worry about saving more and investing too soon. I’ve seen that happen to lots of people, and when it does it can take a decade or more to finally get student loans off your back! You guys have made great progress, and you’re making good money. Don’t give up now! If you stay focused and gazelle-intense about getting out of debt, those student loans will be history in about 18 months. Now is the time to roll up your sleeves, get ticked off at this thing, and really go into attack mode. I understand the temptation you guys are facing, but I want you to stick to the plan. There’s power in behavior modification on a shortterm basis that supersedes the power of mathematics! - Dave
Your husband is wrong
Dear Dave, My husband says there’s more risk associated with using a debit card than a credit card. Is this true? - Brittany Dear Brittany, My advice is to stay away from debt management As long as you’re using a Visa or MasterCard debit card and processing it as a credit card, you will have the same exact protection against fraud and theft as a credit card—period. If your number is misused or your money stolen, both Visa and MasterCard require the member bank to replace the money you lost. In the case of a credit card, they would have to wipe it off your bill. Remember, your debit card has two functions. If you use your debit card as an ATM card—which means you enter your personal identification number—then 8
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your protection extends only as far as your bank or ATM system allows. These protections can vary depending on your particular bank. And most of the time, the protection you receive from the bank alone isn’t nearly as good! —Dave
Child support in the budget?
Dear Dave, My husband and I can’t agree on how we should handle the child support payments I receive. He thinks it should be put in the pool with our household budget money, but right now I keep it in a separate account. Who’s right? - Leslie Dear Leslie, I’m sorry, but in my opinion you’re wrong on this one. My guess is you got burned in the past somehow when it comes to relationships and finances. If this is the case, I don’t blame you for having your momma bear claws out, because these feelings probably come from a desire to protect your kids. But if your husband is a good guy and is willing to raise and treat these kids like they are his own, then the money should go into the pile where it helps take care of the kids and the family. I’d advise having it right at the top of the budget, along with the rest of your household income. Your job as parents is to be a blessing to your kids, and that means feeding them, clothing them, educating them, and providing shelter for them. As long as these things are happening, and we’re talking about a functional, loving marriage, then all the money should be combined and be part of the family. If this isn’t happening, then you’ve got issues other than just money issues. If you’ve been through what I think you have, then it’s okay, too, for you to keep an eye on things and make sure your kids—and the money—are treated and cared for appropriately. Money is important, but I’m more concerned about your marriage. A healthy, loving relationship is one of the best gifts a couple can give to their kids. - Dave
Why only a 15-year mortgage?
Dear Dave, Why do you only recommend 15-year mortgages? - Nikki Dear Nikki, I recommend 15-year mortgages, and never more than that, because the normalization of the 30-year mortgage has helped created a constant state of financial bondage for the middle class. It’s caused average, everyday people to lose hope of ever paying off their homes and being totally debt-free. I understand that it costs a little more per month when you have a 15-year house note instead of a 20- or 30-year
What’s a good retirement goal?
Dear Dave, Do you recommend that people have a certain goal percentage or dollar amount saved for retirement? - Faith Dear Faith, Well, life doesn’t generally happen in linear fashion. In my opinion, your overall goal—closely and constantly adjusted and monitored—should go something like this: Build a nest egg that you can live off about eight percent of. If you have $500,000 stashed away, then that would mean about $40,000 a year. If you’d rather live on $80,000 a year at retirement, you’d need $1 million. Otherwise, you’re liable to start counting on the government. And we all know how well they handle money… Want to know where I got this f igure? Throughout the history of the stock market, the Standard & Poor 500 has averaged between 11 and 12 percent. Some folks don’t think it will average that in the future, but they didn’t think it would when it was booming, either. But, if inf lation runs about three or four percent, and you’re making 11 to 12 percent, you can pull out eight percent, and you’re still leaving enough in there to give yourself an inflation raise every year and not touch your nest egg. - Dave ■
Dave Says
mortgage. But really, it’s just a few dollars more— like 20 percent more than you’d pay on a traditional 30-year mortgage. Plus, it gets you out of debt at least 15 years earlier! Think about this, too. Did you know that people who take out 15-year home loans have a higher probability of paying them off early? It’s true. It’s because they know from the start that they’re not going to have a house payment hanging over their heads for the rest of their lives. They can see light at the end of the tunnel right from the start. Broke people ask questions like how much down and how much per month. Rich people, or people with a plan who are going to be rich one day, ask how much or what’s the total price! - Dave
WARNING!
Halloween Candy is not for pets! No Sweets for Your Furry Sweetie. Several popular Halloween treats are toxic to pets. Candies containing the artificial sweetener xylitol can be poisonous to dogs. Even small amounts of xylitol sweetener can cause a sudden drop in blood sugar, which leads to depression, lack of coordination and seizures. Chocolate, especially baker’s and dark chocolate can also be potentially poisonous to animals, especially dogs. Symptoms of significant chocolate ingestion may include vomiting, diarrhea, hyperactivity, increased thirst and urination, heart rhythm abnormalities, and even seizures.
To-Go and Call-Ahead Waiting
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‘Supporting’ the future by supporting our youth. Your Steel Warehouse, Catering to the Aggregate & Oil Industry Bridgeport Steel & Supply 323 PR 1400 • Bridgeport, Texas
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Dave Ramsey For more financial help, please visit daveramsey.com
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Women’s Occupational Workshop
Developing the Potential Within Yourself and Others “Treat people as if they were what they should be and you help them become what they are capable of becoming.” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
“Potential” is the ultimate goal in both business and self-development. Millions of dollars are spent yearly on information, self-help tools and seminars and training in an attempt to reach the goal of developing your potential. But all the correct tools in the world are of no value if you do not know what you are building. To know what potential is to your business or in your personal life journey, try this “I” checklist. Start by asking the question, “What do “I” want?” It is hard to ‘become’ if you aren’t sure what that ‘looks’ like. This is the first “I” – IMAGINE. Create a visual image of you reaching your potential. This will require a clear-cut goal. Keep that image in front of all involved people. Secondly, IDENTIFY the steps needed to reach your potential. Determine the order how these steps must be followed. A step-by-step checklist will empower you and your staff to move progressively toward your goals. Thirdly, INSTRUCT by example. Teach your plans and steps needed to accomplish the day-by-day tasks that must be completed to reach the finish line. Display the ‘How’ of success before your staff. Remember to INFORM your staff and yourself
Lovette Pediatrics, P.A. Amanda Lovette, M.D.
940-627-8044
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2401 S. FM 51 Suite 100 Decatur, Tx 76234
Sick and Well Care
Most Insurance Plans Accepted
Se Habla Espanol
www.LovetteAugustPediatrics.com
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Keitha Story-Stephenson, Ph.D. owner of BlueSky Wellness Center, provides private consultation for individuals and corporations in Nutritional Wellness, Weight Management, ADD/ADHD Nutritional Management, and other Alternative Health Care; including private, alternative individual behavior therapy. Services are available by appointment in Decatur at 506 West Walnut. Call 817-2399525 for appointment or visit us at www. BlueSkyWellnessCenter.com for more information. Follow us on our Blog, www. DrKeitha.com or www.MerchantsCircle.com . Also, tune in to Christian Radio, KDKR 91.3fm, on Saturdays at 1:30, for “Feeding the FamilyMind, Body and Spirit” or go to KDKR.org for live streaming of our broadcast.
when goals have been accomplished. Always applaud in public and criticize in private. Repeat your plans and goals daily. This will empower the journey. Finally, always remember to INVESTIGATE your results. As change and progress occur, daily steps need re-evaluation. Plans must remain fluid but focused. Resist the urge to view setbacks as failure. They are simply opportunities to prove what doesn’t work in a particular situation. Move ever forward. I love that one synonym for ‘potential’ is ‘possibility’. Rejoice in the journey. Discover all that is within you. You are only limited by what you believe you cannot do! ■
August Pediatrics, P.A. Anissa August, M.D.
New Patients Are Always Welcome Please Call Our Office to Schedule an Appointment
Wishing your family a Safe & Healthy
Keitha Story-Stephenson, Ph.D.
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DECATUR TIRE STORE & SERVICE CENTER B.W. Stone, owner
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Convenient Store Hours Mon.-Fri. 7:30 am - 5:30 pm Sat. 7:30 am - noon 940.627.3657
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Family Album
Kiley Anne and her beautiful boy.
Kindergarten & First Grade Cheerleaders 2011.
Est. 1995
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Decatur Women’s Health Center Who do you TRUST with your OB/GYN care?
Your health and well-being as a woman are our concern. We offer a full range of obstetrical and gynecological care. Our emphasis is on makingYou feel comfortable, confident and reassured.
Douglas Kyle, M.D.
Call today to schedule your next appointment.
940-627-4216
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The Family Album
! s l l u B Go Fun Fact: Former President George W. Bush was once a Cheerleader.
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C
aptain Ira Long was born in Indiana, May 27, 1843, and grew up in northwest Missouri. He entered the Cofederate army and was wounded twice. He married September 15, 1864. He was living in Wise County where he was commissioned to help raise a ranger comopany in 1865. in which he served as first lieutenant, and later became captain. Captain Long had in his possession a collection of Indian armor and dress which he took from a warrior he killed in honorable battle. He also had a letter fropm Major John B. Jones which contained an official report of that battle, it contained a commendation of Captain Long as a man of coolness, bravery and courage. The Long family lived near Sand Hill, where he is buried. There is now an historical marker at his grave. At one time the Wise County Heritage Museum displayed the Indian artifacts mentioned, but were returned to the family. An interesting story is told: Captain long was gone from home so much that Mrs. Long’s father visited the home every Saturday and asked her if the boys had been good during the week, if they hadn’t, he paddled them for her! ■
Wise County Wonderings
Do You Know… ?
Rosalie Gregg Rosalie Gregg was born near Hayden, New Mexico. Ms. Gregg graduated from Paradise High School and from Decatur Baptist College. She married Robert Nolen Gregg, Jr., who had been a Prisoner of War for 3-1/2 year during which time he helped build the railroad that led to the Bridge over the River Kwai in Thailand. Ms. Gregg has been involved with the Wise County Heritage Museum since its inception in 1967. www.wisehistory.com
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It’s the growing season… and planted
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Laying Down the Law
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ou hear it all the time. When you are talking to your friends or family. When you are watching kids play football or participate in school activities. Someone will say it. Someone will be discussing a particular child and say “he’s got potential” or “she really has potential to be great.” What exactly does that mean? The term “potential” means that which is capable of being but not yet in existence, or having possibility, capability, or power. The potential to do things is built into us all. Unfortunately, much of our population is satisfied with claiming their potential without any action to fulfill it. I am not suggesting, however, that every single person can be a millionaire at 21, attend medical school, or graduate valedictorian. I am suggesting that potential is personal and your individual potential, whatever that is, should be explored not ignored. “What’s stopping you?” When I chat with kids and ask them about their future, I sometimes get a half-hearted response that they want to go to college or maybe own their own business. They lack confidence in their potential, so
I ask them “what’s stopping you.” Absent the physical or mental inability, nothing should stop them, but yet they continue to hold themselves back. Why? The answer is the difference between “can’t” and “won’t.” I agree that some things are practically impossible. However, with many things in life and school, its not that you can’t do something, it’s the fact that you won’t put in the extra effort to make it happen. If you want to find your potential and explore just how far you can go, then you must find a way to put the word “can’t” out of your mind. It is a good feeling the first time you feel the “can’t” building up and you push it down to find success. Your life will never be the same. You can do it. You can do more. You can be successful. You can fulfill your potential. ■ James Stainton
Wise County Attorney
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The Family Album
Happy 4th Birthday Aubrey Martin! Brianna Crooks after a successful day fishing with her dad in Minnesota.
Love Mommy, Daddy, Parker, Rhea and Carley
Fun Fact: If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
Katelyn Grace Starnes happy about the 1st day of cooler weather after this hot hot summer.
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Velvet Oberg (a contestant of The Price is Right Show) posing with son, Henry and the cast of the show in Las Vegas.
The Family Album
Aiden Dougherty trying on his new tie and hat.
Clayton and Chloe Hammons after a Saturday game.
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Life Skills Technically Polite- Part 2
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emember when conversations were held face-to-face? Two or more people would gather and share thoughts, work out issues, and cement relationships. We enjoyed the benefit of hearing the words another spoke, seeing the gestures and subtle body movements, and profited from the ability to ask questions for clarification and full understanding. Technology has forever shifted how we communicate. Today, we talk, we text, we tweet, and we write on each other’s walls. And, thanks to smart phones and tablets, we can do so anywhere and anytime. Whatever the method of communication may be, one thing remains constant: we must demonstrate behavior that is considerate and polite. Email Tips • Emails are best used for communicating action items, facts, or, friendly hellos. Information should be kept brief and, once sent, can be used as a legal document. • Think about your email address. It reflects your image and creates an impression about you. Do you really want to be known as “sexykitten@......”? • Avoid sending chain emails. While you may enjoy them and have time to read them, others do not. • Carefully consider your background. Decorative backgrounds often cause technical challenges when replying. The best image for business-minded individuals is a clean white background. • Create a signature line that includes your appropriate contact information. • Note the topic in the subject line and keep that string of emails in tack. You don’t want the recipient to have to scramble to locate what had been said previously. When you address a new topic, start a new email. • When sending an attachment, state what it contains in the body of your email. • Use the CC feature when you would like to openly include others in your email correspondence. Use BCC when you would like to include others without revealing them to each other. Think before you hit reply. Is your reply intended for everyone on the list, or just one person? • Emoticons and abbreviations in texting are fine, provided the recipient knows what they mean; but they should be avoided in emails – especially in business. • Read your email out loud prior to sending—to check for tone. Social Media Tips It is always surprising that some people still think that what they post online is private. It is not! Always ask yourself this question, “Would I want to see this post on the 5 o’clock news tonight?” Give care to what you say and what you post. You DO have an online reputation, and it lives forever! 18
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Photos between friends should be kept private unless your friend gives you permission to post them. Never post a photo that does not show all parties in a positive light. Just as with face-to-face communication, you need to know your online friends and interact with them appropriately. Prior to every communication, ask yourself what is the purpose of this communication, and then select the method that best meets your needs. Whether you’re talking, texting, tweeting, and/or writing on a wall, please remember to be technically polite! If you would like to learn more about how to communicate with class, please check out my chapter in Image Power at www.finaltouchschool.com — under Etiquette Resources. ■ Deborah King, AICI CIP Deborah King is President of Final Touch Finishing School, Inc. which she founded in 1989 in Seattle. As a certified image professional, with over 30 years of experience, she presents her programs nationally and internationally for youth and corporate clients. She is co-author of “Image Power” and “Executive Etiquette Power” and developer of several education tools. www.finaltouchschool.com.
Bad News For Bullies
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5 Dirty Secrets of Bullies to Bully-Proof Kids
few years ago, a bully in our neighborhood mistook my children for prey. Bullies are generally good at sizing up victims but my sons were a surprise. They weren’t willing to be smacked around on the playground, verbally assaulted on the bus, or belittled in the neighborhood. They spoke up, and it was necessary to get the school involved. That bully’s social and physical cruelty was eventually exposed, and I wish I could tell you resolving it was a tidy affair. The reality is it can be an awkward messy road (complete with lies!) to bring deliberate, hurtful, repeated bullying behavior to an end.
Bullies Exposed
It’s important to talk to your kids about what constitutes bullying. Should they become a target, you want them to feel safe coming forward. When victims keep their torment a secret, they may feel shamed or turn their anger inward. Fortunately, response training and bully-proofing can empower kids. Bully-proofing is bad news for bullies and can increase the likelihood children will not become a target. The following dirty secrets (from the bully’s perspective!) reflect current literature and expert advice. They provide a framework to discuss bullying with children and will direct you to books and sites with more info.
Shhhhhhh!
DIRTY LITTLE SECRET #1: Unsupervised hangouts work to my advantage. As a bully, far corners of the playground, hallways, stairwells, restrooms, the back of the bus, and the mall are some of my favorite places to confront victims. Antidote: Avoid a bully’s comfort zone. Parenting expert and author of The Big Book of Parenting Solutions (2009) Michele Borba recommends teaching your children specific places to avoid bullies and when they should leave the scene. DIRTY LITTLE SECRET #2: I need you to become upset. When you react with emotion, I feel powerful. Antidote: Don’t let her see you sweat. In Bully-proofing Children (2006) Joanne Scaglione explains bullying gives “control and that feeling of power over their prey.” Expert Izzy Kalman stresses kids should respond with a sense of humor and never let bullies see them upset. His book Bullies to Buddies (2005) is full of tips to recycle fear into courage, and he offers free downloadable advice here: www. bullies2buddies.com. DIRTY LITTLE SECRET #3: If you appear confident, you probably won’t get picked on. I like my prey quiet, hanging their head, and looking nervous. Minimal eye contact and tonguetied is cool too. Antidote: Pay attention to posture. Borba recommends teaching your child to be aware of strong body posture and how to deliver NO in a firm voice. It might seem odd at first to have your child rehearse “a stone
faced glare,” but it’s a strategy she recommends. Kalman is also passionate about targets using words. He says “freedom of speech is the ultimate solution--granting this to others and using it to prevent victimization.” Barbara Coloroso in The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander urges parents to provide opportunities to develop a strong sense of self (and let’s face it, self-confidence can translate into more assertive posture they won’t have to fake!). DIRTY LITTLE SECRET #4: Talking to a parent spoils everything. Keeping quiet is huge. If you spill, I’ll probably have to stop bullying. I tell you things will get miserable if you tell anyone, but the truth is they’ll become miserable for me. Antidote: Don’t keep this secret. If you notice a pattern of your daughter mentioning “she was mean…” it’s possible this is code for her being bullied. In Little Girls Can Be Mean (2010) Anthony and Lindert stress observing the social situation and connecting with your child as bully-proofing strategies. Retrieving personal power is a tool in Jay McGraw’s nononsense approach to dealing with bullies in his book Life Strategies for Dealing With Bullies (2008). McGraw encourages targets of bullies to get adults involved and not go it alone. Borba emphasizes “tell your child you’ll take it seriously” so she’ll confide in you. Your child needs to feel safe, but you should never mislead her into thinking you’ll keep the bullying a secret. Parents should also speak up. Joanne Scaglione recommends that parents not be afraid to ask schools “what are the rules?” about their anti-bully policy. DIRTY LITTLE SECRET #5: Alone, you’re an easy target. Without at least one good friend, a group, or a seat by the bus driver, you’re making it too easy. Antidote: Company is good, and if you’re struggling to make friends, do ask for help. Coloroso indicates at least one good friend can be powerful and envisions bullies, the bullied, and the bystander as “three characters in a tragic play.” When victims rewrite the script and create new roles for themselves, the plot changes. This is bad news for bullies who will be forced to find another character or (hopefully) change their own. Parents play a critical role in helping their kids find opportunities for belonging whether it is sports, hobbies, or another interest. Coloroso recommends making sure kids know how to introduce themselves to a group and how to nurture strong healthy relationships. For more great bully-proofing tips, visit Michele Borba’s blog at www.micheleborba.com. Michele Ranard, M.Ed. Michele Ranard has a husband, two children, and a master’s in counseling. Find her at hellolovelychild.blogspot.com and hellolovelyinc.blogspot.com.
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Family Album
Landon & Lacy Hankins.
Fun Fact:
Children laugh about 400 times a day, while adults laugh on average only 15 times a day. Calleigh Hope Hilton, Daughter of Cristie Hilton.
Wise Pediatrics
940-626-4400 A Specialist for your children as they grow!
Come see our outstanding line of award-winning instruments.
Leslie Hollis, MD
1208 S. FM 51 • Suite I-1 Decatur, TX 76234 • 940-626-2120 • www.DecaturMusic.com
Rhome Family Practice
Board Certified in Pediatrics since 1999 Fellow of the American Academy of Pediatrics
Newborn to Geriatrics
Andrew W. Hoover M.D., P.A. Board Certified Family Practice Most Insurance Accepted Now Offering Alkaline IV Therapy and HCG Diet Program
Office Hours: Mon.-Thurs. 8 am - Noon,1 pm -5 pm Friday 8 am - noon
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600 S. Main Street, Rhome www.wisewellnesscentertexas.com
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Accepting Most Insurances Call if you have any questions
609 Medical Center Dr., #2300 Decatur, Texas 76234 Attached to Wise Regional Hospital www.WisePediatrics.com
The Family Album
Kelan, Kutler, & Kolson Jenkins enjoying Lake Bridgeport!
Ryan(age 8) and Madison (age7) Barnett, at South Padre Island.
Haviana Phillips of Boyd on her 1st birthday.
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Name
Wise Merchants Association Membership Benefits The Wise Merchants Association was founded in June 2009 by Kim Tinkham to help local businesses weather the recession. The goal of this Association is to allow merchants to share ideas, problems and solutions with other merchants. Our Association meetings are structured to provide information, education, and motivation for business owners, as well as networking opportunities. We believe in having local merchants support each other and in keeping shopping dollars local. Our Association does not compete with the local Chambers, and actually partners with them on occasion for special events. We are a unique Association with the only goal of providing business owners information they need to grow their business! Membership Benefits: • Motivational speakers • Training • Informal meetings • Networking opportunities • Excellent sponsors • Supportive members • Business owner focused
Additional Business Benefits: • Highly recognized by the Wise County Clerk and Wise County Attorney • Recommended by many local organizations • Discounted advertising in Wise Family Today Magazine • Discounts on member’s products or services
Our meetings have included training for business owners in marketing, networking, social media, business goal setting, sales training, and business etiquette. We also have informal, after-hours Mixers that are a great opportunity to bring guests. Thank you to our members and we encourage you to take advantage of all of your membership benefits. If you are not a member, we invite you to join us at www.wisemerchants.org! 22
Company
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Gold and Silver Perfection . . . . . . . . . . . . . www.numisnetwork.com/ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . goldandsilverperfection Karen St. John . . . . . . . . . Hampton Inn . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . www.hampton.com Dave Jackson . . . . . . . . . . Jackson Excavation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . www.jacksonexcavation.com Jack Bullion . . . . . . . . . . . Juice Plus . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . www.jackjuiceplus.com Bonnie Kohnert . . . . . . . . K-Double-K Promotional Products . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . kdoublek.com Lynn Self . . . . . . . . . . . . . Karl Klement . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . www.klementdecator.com Deborah L. Mann . . . . . . Mann Refrigeration . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . www.mannair.com Laura M Shaffer . . . . . . . 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Wise County Attorney . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . www.wisecountylaw.com Sherry Lemon . . . . . . . . . Wise County Clerk . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . www.wisecounty.org Tayler Ponder . . . . . . . . . Wise Family Magazine . . . . . . . . . . . www.wisefamilymagazine.com Valerie Dickerson . . . . . . Workforce Solutions-North Central Texas . . . . . . www.dfwjobs.com
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