pretty much dead on most of the time. I am writing to you about the Tiger Woods story. I am about Tiger’s age and have been married about five years and am considering having an affair. My wife is completely preoccupied with our 3-year-old. She wears T-shirts and boxers to bed and has lost all interest in me sexually. I consider myself lucky if we have sex once a month. I am attractive and work out and keep myself in shape—women in my office find me attractive, and a couple have asked me out. I love my wife, but I can’t stand the fact that she is letting herself and our relationship go. She got me into reading your columns, so I am hoping you choose to print my letter. I just feel so rejected by her. P.S. I am an avid golfer. I have hidden my golf clubs after the violence Tiger experienced. LOL. Avid Golfer
Dear Avid Golfer,
I am glad that you decided to write about rather than act on your current options. I don’t know whether you have talked to your wife about your concerns, but you should if you haven’t. I have had a small child at home and know that sometimes it’s tough to feel sexy when you are dealing with dirty diapers and sleep deprivation. It is really important during these times, however, to stay connected and communicate. You may want to take a few things upon yourself, such as buying her some pretty clothes as well as lingerie and treat her to a day at the spa. Let her know how beautiful she is and that you want to make her feel special. A lot of overwhelmed moms are tired and feel less than sexy. If you help her in subtle ways to feel good about herself, you will reap the benefits. I really think you will see big dividends with just a few small gestures. (Ever notice how we are drawn to people who make us feel good about ourselves?) Make her feel special and important and communicate with her—then you won’t have to hide the golf clubs. Keep me posted!
'SPN DPODFQU UP SFBMJUZ 5IF LJUDIFO ZPV XBOU POMZ CFUUFS
-FU VT NBLF ZPVS ESFBNT B SFBMJUZ
$BMM GPS B '3&& EFTJHO DPOTVMUBUJPO
$BCJOFUT 'MPPSJOH 6QIPMTUFSZ (SBOJUF 2VBSU[ )BSEXBSF
PS WJTJU VT POMJOF BU $BCJOFUT DPN Let us make your dreams a reality. Call for a FREE design consultation.
602.971.1715
or visit us online at 101Cabinets.com
4JOLT 'JYUVSFT t $BCJOFUT t $PVOUFST t ,JUDIFOT
t #BUIT t 8JOEPXT USFBUNFOUT t %FTJHO
Cdl GZ\^hiZg^c\ [dg ;Vaa '%&% A^b^iZY HeVXZ 6kV^aVWaZ
Lea
Final Thought
Staying connected is vital and is the responsibility of both parties. It really does take two to make a relationship work, to ensure that the “worse� portion of “for better or for worse� is but a fleeting moment in time. One party should not be expected to shoulder all the responsibility. FEBRUARY | MARCH 2010 North Valley
71