the T zine
gratitude gems, nov.'17
I N THI S I SSUE spi l l t h e T 03 l i st en t o t h i s 05 r ead t h i s 08 ou t +abou t 11 w at ch t h i s 13 dope sh i t 15 t ast em ak er 24 i n f l u en cer 27 t h i n k abou t i t 30
spi l l th e T.. . let t er f r om t h e edit or Naturally, around this time of year my thoughts are dominated by overwhelming gratitude. This year has been far more special than years past. For one, this digital publication has possibly saved my life. I say that with true conviction, because I finally found my niche. My calling. Added another love to my life. Your support means the absolute most to me, but I do this for myself. For most of my life I?ve been afraid to be selfish, not anymore. I?ve never flourished this naturally and believed in myself this strongly. Thank you for taking part of this journey with me. I?ve allowed love to take lead this year. Scary and choppy, unchartered waters for me. It?s something that I?ve never done before, especially in my adult life. Fully, allowed myself to embrace vulnerability and fought for a love that I am madly grateful for. That alone has taught me about my deep insecurities, how to work through them and not project them onto others. The learning curve is real and sometimes hurtful, but I know I this is my person. Thank you for being my person, baby. Working on myself will be my never-ending project. I came to the realization that I?ve been chasing perfection for the better part of my life. Not obsessing over perfection and accepting my flaws helps tremendously. Now I?m unafraid to say that I am guarded, fussy, short-tempered and insecure. On the flipside I am, genuine, loving, a good listener, and your rock if you need me. Let?s not forget my impeccable sense of humor. Toot, toot! The magic is in the balance and how hard you want to persevere. To cap things off, this is the 7th edition of the T zine and 2017 is fast coming to an end. Can you believe it?! We?re in the thick of fall, the weather is finally getting chillier and the holiday season is around the corner. Spare me any Thanksgiving slander, as this is my favorite holiday. I?m no Grinch, but there?s just something so special about Thanksgiving dinners with my family. Gifts aren?t the premise behind getting together, it?s simply food and spirits. Don?t ask me to cook anything either, I take care of the spirits, because somebody has to do it and? yasss! Cheers to us! Thank you, thank you, thank you!
@m st if f alexan dr a f ou n der / edit or -in -ch ief 03
@acnestudios
l i sten to th i s.. . Th e Su bt le Ar t of Not Givin g a F&ck : A Cou n t er in t u it ive Appr oach t o Livin g a Good Lif e M ar k M an son I?m no stranger to self-help books and all the Zen that comes along with them. Coming across Mark Manson?s,The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F* ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life, gave me Zen with a lot of f* cks, too. Spoiler: He?s not subtle at all, sometimes even crude and vulgar. Oh, and he gives zero f* cks and all the f* cks at the same time. By the way, I chose the Audible app (as I usually do) to get through this book and boy was it an experience. Hey, @Audible, sponsor me? All profanity aside, Manson is extremely clever and philosophical. He disguised that nasty four-letter word as a way to teach you about values.The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F* ckis about zeroing in on what?s most important to you while letting go of everything else. There is encouragement to limit your exposure to mindless distractions such as social media, television and things that have little to no meaning or value in your life. He states: ?If your emotions are constantly being pushed this way or that way, and you feel like you?re never in control, it?s probably because you?re valuing a lot of the wrong things.? This book goes beyond self-help and guidance. It?s a brutality honest and a much-needed reality check about our personal problems, fears, and expectations. There is no fluff or overly positive jargon that we?re so used to getting from self-help gurus. Manson makes us boldly confront our painful truths, faults and uncertainties. It ain?t pretty, but God don?t like ugly.
We are all naturally drawn to happiness, sometimes filling ourselves up with delusions and denial. We walk around, chests perked up, entitled little brats. Or some of us, humble-braggers get passes. But Manson?s refreshing honesty makes you confront and work through those delusions to clearly see that they are needed. Instead of aiming for an unattainably perfect, problem free, feel-good life, Mark suggests you ask yourself, ?What problem do you want to have?? From that, I?ve adopted the ?that?s a good problem to have? mantra. I find myself complaining because Sephora sold out of the $25 liquid lipstick that I wanted. That?s a good problem to have. Too many extracurriculars and not enough time to get to all? That?s a good problem to have. Can?t see my boyfriend as often as I could because I work a full time job and want to be a good mother to my son. Great problems to have. So, you see, the line between prioritizing f* cks can be quite clear. It?s all up to weed out the f* ck-yes from the f* ck-nots. I?ve always been relatively level-headed, other than when I?m going bat-shit crazy, so Manson?s vision was easy for me to accept. His delivery was exactly what I needed. There is a distinct method to his madness that I highly encourage you to visit. Disclaimer, proceed with caution if listening to this on speaker, it can be quite off-putting to some. Or go the traditional route and pick up the book. Don?t be afraid to give a f* ck. 05
read th i s.. . Br it ish Vogu e Dec 2017 I don?t think I?ve ever been as excited for a magazine cover as I was for British Vogue?s December 2017 issue. It?s the first for newly appointed Editor-in-Chief Edward Enninful and he chose model-activist Adwoa Aboah as his cover beauty. Enninful was born in Ghana and Aboah was born in London, England to an English mother, and a Ghanaian father. This is where she gets her striking, freckled beauty. Something that she struggled with when she tried to fit-in with the blonde-hair, blue-eyed counterparts as a child. All of this, while her mother and father, pillars in the fashion industry, would ogle at her model-like beauty. Obviously, Enninful chose Aboah because of her beauty, but the story is less vain than that. Aboah?s first cover of Vogue came a mere 18 months ago, when she debuted on its Italian edition. She is the daughter of Camilla Lowther, one of the world?s most successful agents, and father Charles Aboah, London?s go-to location scout. In spite of that, being on Vogue?s cover solidified her place in the industry?s inner circle. The catch? No one knew that cover arrived on newsstands a couple of months after a suicide attempt that left Aboah in a coma for four days. Since then, Aboah has used her model profile and her searing honesty about her own battles with addiction to launch Gurls Talk, an online community devoted to giving a voice to young women as lost as she once was. Gurls Talk remains a community rooted on the Internet, with its website, StyleLikeU video and a short film on i-D. However, Adwoa hosted an event with the brand Coach in London that drew 700 attendees from across the continent. She manifested this moment and brought what she calls her ?tribe? together. Everyone benefited and their unique message: ?you are not alone,? reverberated deeply. Aboah is an addict in recovery. This movement might be risky to some, but she has said, ?I have to be very careful now, going forward, that I leave some time for myself, thinking time, love and self-care. I?m highly co-dependent. I just want to givegivegive. It?s why I started Gurls Talk, and why it?s still going.? Enninful sees Aboah?s potential. Her honesty presents itself before she does.
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@acnestudios
out+about.. . Bar Velo/ Tr oph y Bar It?s no mystery that I became enamored with Cuba since my trip this past summer. I?ve even named giving Cuba travel advise as my favorite past-time. Talking about heading back next year, god willing. My heart shattered when news came that a category 5 hurricane was headed in their direction. I emailed our sweet taxi driver upon hearing of Hurricane Irma?s imminent landfall on the island. Thankfully, all was well with them. Shortly after, my childhood best friend contacted me to join her at a fundraiser for Cuba Irma Relief and I jumped at the idea. The shindig was being held at Trophy Bar in Brooklyn and that almost stopped me, but I mentally prepared myself for the hike. We made a whole thing of it by making dinner plans at Bar Velo before, because that?s the way it?s done. Bar Velo was the perfect, quaint, vegan spot. Dimly lit for our romantic, girlfriend to girlfriend pow wow. It was interesting to see the juxtaposition of a glorified-bodega-supermarket with its harsh fluorescent lighting coming from across the street. Did I mention the J train runs above it? I?m not sure if I?m immune to the rowdy noises of the subway, but it didn?t bother me at all. Inside, the dĂŠcor was very kitschy, with oars as overhead fans and beautiful, rich, hardwood floors running through it. A very talented jazz duo played their set whilst we dined. The menu had interesting options and the food was delicious. After dinner, we walked a few yards down to Trophy Bar where the Cuba Irma Relief was being held. We made our contribution and were handed tickets for a raffle that was to follow. Sadly, we didn?t win. No sore losers over here, because we had such a good time. The man playing the congas made you feel the Afro-Cuban beats deeper. DJs played a wide range of music, but kept close to the island vibes. I loved every minute of it.
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Tr oph y Bar
Bar Velo
w atch th i s.. . Fr an ca: Ch aos an d Cr eat ion The relationship between a mother and her son is something complex, beautiful and rewarding. I know this because I?m a mom to a teenage boy. The dynamics of Franca Sozzanni and her son Francesco Carrozzini are beautifully
depicted
documentary:Franca:
in
his
Chaos
and
Creation. Until now I hadn?t seen a mother and son connection as similar to mine as Franca and her only son. Their deep bond is effortless, playful, and admirable.
stating that she wasn?t ever into the ?family? lifestyle, yet her bond with her son was undeniably solid. The film focuses on the unorthodox ways she chose to portray taboo views in the magazine. She wanted the foreign
language
magazine
to
transcend all barriers. This was done with stunning photography. Franca?s take on cosmetic surgery and domestic violence were iconic, graphic and an honest, artistic portrayal
on
each
matter. It?s amazing to see that she
Franceso, lost his father a few years back without knowing much about
could focus on the styling and the cause with an impeccable eye. I can
him. He vowed to make a change when
truly see what Franca was trying to do
it came to his relationship with his
with
mother. In the film, he picks and prods at her with intimate questions. At
expression and respect her more for it.
times, annoying her because of his questions
about
failure
and
past
relationships. One epic onscreen moment, is him finding out he was conceived while his father was still married.
Most
of
these
moments happening in
intimate car
rides,
solidifying how busy Franca was until the very end.
this
provocative
artistic
Franca: Chaos and Creation isn?t only for the fashion lover, it?s for
anyone
looking to reawaken their inspiration. Especially, women. We are subconsciously and consciously raised to
be
wives,
submissive Franca?s
mothers,
and
the
counterpart
to
males.
determination
to
be
a
revolutionary in her field speaks to her character. It helps with my own
Beside this biopic being brilliantly shot,
insecurities
you get to witness Franca?s rise to her
mother. Balancing it all is exhausting,
iconic Editor-in-Chief post at Italian Vogue. All while being a single mother
yet feeds my resilience. Although, Franca past shortly after the release of
to a child born from a married man.
the film, her spirit with live on for
She went against the grain from early
eternity.
on, breaking all the traditional Italian ideals. Overall, going against traditional ideals about woman in general. Franca was an unapologetic working woman and mom. Boldly 08
as
a
single,
working,
dope sh i t.. . Raise Th e M acallan I?ve never been that person that has enough events to attend to add to their calendar. That solidifies how non-Kardashian I am, there?s nothing to keep up with over here. But things have changed in the past couple of months. This is where I have to give thanks to my social skills in that they?ve help me build friendships with a solid, intelligent, group of men and women. Mostly women. Shout out to my RAF crew and yes that is our group chat name too. I?ve been running amok with these gals, laughing and just having a good, chill time. Leave it to them to make my first ever (insert spirit of choice here) tasting to be the funniest experience. We hit up the Raise The Macallan event after work on a Wednesday evening. It was in a nondescript, warehouse building in downtown Manhattan, across the street from UPS. Suited men, both ushers and bouncers, outside its doors were the only clear indicator that something uber cool might be happening inside.
Ask anyone and they will know I bled jack and cokes since I can remember. An abnormal blood sugar test I took a few years back made me switch over to vodka sodas. Not out of the clear (no pun intended) when it comes to managing my blood sugar, but it?s a step in the right direction. The event was put together awesomely, aside from not being able to get through the actual tasting portion of it. Check out my IG (@mstiffalexandra, shameless plug) to see the cool, slow-motion group video we did as part of the experience. It hilariously depicts all of our personalities. Looking forward to laughing at our asses off at the next tasting.
The vibe inside was mellow, considering we would be handed what felt like an insane amount of alcohol. I was one of the ones out of that bunch that could barely taste each one, let alone finish an entire glass. At one point we tried adding ice cubes to our drinks, but nada. Every swallow felt like gasoline going down. This comes from a Jack Daniel?s lover.
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.. . NYCLVVV I?m a sucker for a museum exhibit, but if it?s a fashion related exhibit, my heart flutters even more. My RAF crew got together for yet another after work rendezvous and went to the Louis Vuitton VOLEZ, VOGUEZ, VOYAGEZ presentation at the American Stock Exchange Building. Curated by Olivier Saillard it retraces the journey of the House of Louis Vuitton from 1854 to the present. The portrait designs, divided into ten chapters were done by Robert Carsen and it?s devoted to the United States and New York City. It is spectacular. You are welcomed with a wall projection of a moving subway rail and a subway-tiled wall emblazoned with the Louis Vuitton name. Understated but so impressive. I dare you not to photograph the wall or yourself at that point. The first pieces you see are the House?s symbolic and iconic trunk. Then you?re weaving your way through their colorful, contemporary pieces and collaborations. Up escalators, around corners, room after room after room. There is an oceanic-themed room that left me awestruck. A ginormous, floor to ceiling sail, you might as well be out in the deep blue. This exhibit felt like a perfectly curated scavenger hunt. There was an undeniable effortlessness in design and direction. Whimsical touches and a flawless execution with imagination was undeniable. All coming together like the seamless, luxury brand that is Louis Vuitton.
dow n w / i t.. . Zar a
.. .
.. .
.. .
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tastemak er.. . @er ik abear m an Erika Bearman is memorable. Unforgettable. With big, haunting, piercing eyes. The poise of a prima ballerina. And an undeniable glamour and sense of self that as a fellow mom, is admirable. I followed her long before catching a glimpse of her at the Oscar de la Renta talk at the FIAF. An amazing and treasured experience in itself. Bearman, formerly the SVP of communications at Oscar de la Renta and now independent consultant, was the brains behind @OscarPRGirl. A truly, brilliant and aesthetically pleasing account behind the incomparable Oscar de la Renta brand. Back in 2009, she tweeted as @OscarPRGirl and instantly made de la Renta feel more accessible. Impeccably sharing de la Renta?s timeless, most glamourous aesthetic with the masses. Proven social media maven, her influence was undeniable. Sadly, @OscarPRGirl is of no more. Having started working so closely with him in her mid-twenties, she describes Oscar as a ?defining presence in my adult life.? By this point, Erika had long adopted a ?speak when spoken to?mentality when dealing with people in the industry. This way of thinking was carried into her time at de la Renta, yet Oscar thought otherwise and told her ?come over here, don?t stand against the wall,? when she made herself invisible. Powerful words that catapulted her to change it up. She became one of the late designer ?s muse and was even the inspiration behind the fragrance: Extraordinary. Bearman is an Extraordinary woman. Wife and mom to Electra, a gorgeous toddler, outfitted in the most delicate pieces. She decided to take a step back from the SVP role to focus on her family and personal endeavors. Working as a consultant for brands she is showcasing her vivid, glamorous, chic vision in a way only she can deliver. The woman went platinum blonde and is said to either be in heels or barefoot, no in between. She has brought her talents to Peanut, a Tinder-esque app geared towards getting moms together. It's genius. You can find Bearman hosting various Peanut soirĂŠes for moms making new mom friends. I?ve yet to make it to an event, but can?t wait to share ideas with like-minded, strong, independent, mothers. I will always measure your level of success as a public figure with your readiness to engage with your audience. Especially, when on socials, where it?s as easy as hitting the like button or sending an emoji response as a comment. Bearman and I have had many exchanges and for that I am immensely grateful. Being thoughtful is a quality I sincerely admire in people. She is a wife, mother and business woman who finds the time, or designates the time, in the day to respond to a stranger/crazy fangirl. For that I an forever grateful. Thank you, Erika.
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i nf l uencer.. . @allegr ash aw x Un cle Stumbling across Allegra Shaw?s YouTube channel (allegralouise) was sheer luck and mostly because strategic social media algorithms make the world go around. Lately, I?ve been crazily into the fashion-centric YouTube community and she is a 24-year-old, Western alum, blogger, and entrepreneur. At 24 years young she is co-owner of Uncle Apparel, an everyday basics, ethically and sustainably made brand. Taking a look at the Uncle S/S ?17 Lookbook and it feels a bit American Apparel-esque, with risquĂŠ styling, yet stands solid like Acne. One t-shirt has the word ?feminist? in a simple font, a universal and powerful stance. Allegra is born and raised in Toronto and most of the Uncle clothes is made in Canada. The Uncle site states, ?from conception of the design, to pattern making, to knitting the fabric to putting it on our website for you to shop, it?s all done here.? ?Here? being Canada. If outsourcing, Uncle only works with ethically ran companies. In one of her videos, Allegra is adamant that she will discontinue working with a fabric swatch company because the man that they interact with treats women poorly. It?s a commendable and hella ballsy move on her end. Especially, being a new brand. To me, that is what an entrepreneur should be. Be unwavering in your decision-making and stick to your ethical and moral standards. Command respect as a brand and a human being. Create work that is original, thought-provoking and parallel to your vision. Repeat until world domination. Allegra and her team at Uncle are well on their way.
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@u n clexst u dios
th i nk about i t.. . u n apologet ically, gr at ef u l I?m sat here at my computer, it is nearly midnight, looking over my notes from the past month. Collecting my scattered thoughts and trying to put them back together in a clear and concise manner, for you to connect with and just get through. I can only say that after a good 9 or 10 months of mostly, delusions of unicorns and rainbows, I?ve come to [better] grips with myself. Well, perhaps they?re not all delusions, some of the shitty parts were me being afraid to confront the difficult conversations that I need to be having with myself and others. I became an expert at sweeping things under the rug, um, I don?t even like to sweep. It took me this long to come to terms with the fact that I can finally admit that I am a people pleaser, disguised as a no-f* ck-giver. Thank you, Mark Manson. I give too many f* cks to people and things that are insignificant.Non-motherf* cking factors, as Ms. Evelyn Rosado likes to say. It can range from toxic people in my close inner circle to a brand that won?t return email requests for collaborations. I find myself trying to accommodate the toxic people around me instead of
subtracting that negative energy. Sulking about unanswered emails, instead of moving on and continuing to hone my craft. It is something that I deal with on a daily basis, but I am grateful to be moving forward in the process. Setting unrealistic expectations and punishing myself when not achieved are other struggles that I?m battling head on. I want things and that usually means I want them right now, or yesterday. This publication is my pride and joy and I wish I could give it 100% of my time and attention, but I have to realize that I am a one woman show. Working a regular, degular 9-5, in a relationship, being a mom, daughter, sister and friend. I can?t punish myself for publishing two weeks late, I can only force myself to manage my time going forward. Like anything in life, it?s always easier to quit and I?m not a quitter, at least not any more. I will forever be a ray of f* cking sunshine, but I thoroughly enjoy my cloudy days. I?m allowing myself to just feel. Whether it be anger, jealously, regret, or even worse, disappointment, in myself and others. Being mindful of not spreading nasty energies because nobody likes a 18
Debbie Downer. Addressing the issues at hand in a respectful manner, internally and externally. Own the power to confront those demons. Don?t internalize. It leads to crippling pain and will make the world around you feel like its crumbing. So, I am eternally grateful for all of this awakening and more. I vow to continue to focus on myself. It started by not quitting on myself and that led me to the amazing relationships I?m cultivating today. The good and the bad have to be felt equally in order to come out of the other side of things. Tolerance within myself has led me to be tolerant of those around me. Building healthy boundaries for myself and around myself because toxicity is so, so real. Trusting myself has brought me to speak out in favor or against things that deserve to be questioned. Don?t be hesitant to address things in fear of sabotaging a relationship. The greatest connections are earned not given. That goes for you and the relationships you choose to nurture. I can and will say thank you a million times and it will never be enough.
th eTzi ne
getth eTzi ne
END.