Tickled Squirrel April 2021 by Mellow Media

Your local magazine for Gretna, Gretna Green, Springfield, Longtown, Carlisle, Lockerbie, Langholm, Moffat, Annan and all the beautiful towns and villages in our area.

April has arrived, and with it more signs of spring and also, of course, Easter. The vaccinations are still progressing and as more people receive their first dose, the number of infections continues to fall. But we mustn’t fall into the trap of becoming complacent. It is all too easy to think it is over and before we know it, another lock down. So please think before you go out. With us all having to spend longer at home, we have included more for you to do or read, and included a story for the younger ones, and us older ones who are still children at heart. All advertising remains completely free of any charges and we are working on keeping it this way while businesses are still struggling to remain profitable. So should you or someone you know have any need of completely free advertising that is now reaching more and more people every month, please get them to email us. We hope you enjoy this month’s issue and we would love to hear from you if you have any ideas for articles or would like to contribute yourself. Just send us an email, or a WhatAapp message. Email: editor@tickledsquirrel.com WhatsApp: +44 7964 262 288

Our Thanks

As every month, our thanks go out to all the contributors to the magazine for their interesting and informative articles. Your hard work is always very much appreciated

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ads@tickledsquirrel.com editor@tickledsquirrel.com Whatsapp: +447964262288 (Also Telegram & Viber) https://www.facebook.com/ Tickled-Squirrel100207221692005 Tickled Squirrel Magazine accepts no responsibility for the services, goods or work provided by any advertiser. Although we do our best to ensure that contents is correct we accept no liability for any errors or omissions. No part of this magazine, in part or whole, may be reproduced without prior written permission.

In This Month’s Magazine Help Free The Bears

A Fun Quiz

The Missing Amulet

It’s Not Rocket Science

48 49

Fire Safety

Jokes Page

What’s Wrong With Politics?

Mellow Media Budget

Mellow Musical Memories with Vince Tracy 50

The Devil’s Porridge

Do You Know A Local Hero?

Calling All Veterans and Serving Members of the Armed Forces 26

Do TV Soaps Reflect Society - Or Influence It? 54

Military Quiz Part 2

Gretna FC 2008

Don’t Help The Thieves

Tech Tips

Heather Berry

If we have a bad experience most of us should learn from it 66

Puzzles Pages

Puzzles For Children

Bill’s Tunisian Rescue

Book Review

Puzzle Solutions

Would You Like To Lose Weight? Then NOW is the time to start on the path to your healthy weight There really has never been a more important time to take control of our weight and wellbeing. Obesity and type 2 diabetes are linked and both increase the risk of complications from Covid-19.

Easter Is Here Start Your New Transformation Find me on Facebook at 121DietCumbria Or call me on 07970 614763 (During lockdown I work from Home)

Unit 5 Market Arcade Scotch Street, Carlisle

Keep your business in the public eye. Things may be slow, people may be worried, but you need to keep your business visible right now.

You can advertise here for absolutely no charge and no commitment. Just email us and we will design an advertisement and place it in the magazine. No Charges of Any Kind

Help Free The Bears There are many ways you can contribute to saving these majestic creatures. The first thing to do is to visit their website at https:// freethebears.org/

only time for a present). You can become a bear carer with a small subscription each month.

There you will see the many ways in which you can help them. At the time of writing, most of the world is limiting travel so going along to volunteer is not an option unless you are already living near to a sanctuary, but you can sponsor a bear, make a purchase for yourself or as a gift (Christmas is not the https://www.facebook.com/freethebearsfund

The Missing Amulet I have always considered myself as lucky. Sure, I get some hard times, but somehow it always comes out right in the end. That’s the secret I guess, always look for the good part and you will generally find it. And that’s what happened one day last week when a knock on the door presented me with someone who matched the expression ‘man mountain’ perfectly. Now I am not short, just over 6 feet, but this guy towered over me, and he would have had to turn sideways to fit through the door. Fortunately he didn’t seem to want to and he just looked at me and said, “I have been asked to tell you to keep your nose out of business that doesn’t concern you. And I don’t want to have to come back.” With that, he left. And I just watched him go. I am not easily frightened, but this was definitely serious. The only problem was that I hadn’t had a case for over a week and I hadn’t a clue what he was referring to. I racked my brains to try to think of anything I might have investigated recently that could still have any loose ends, but it wasn’t until the phone rang that I remembered

that time, all those months back, when I had received a call that had been meant for someone else. I wondered if it was related as I picked up the receiver. “I hear you have been in an accident that wasn’t your fault,” the mechanical voice chanted. I put the phone down, angry at the interruption by the stupid scam call. But at least it had reminded me of the mix up that had almost got me killed before. I still couldn’t see any connection though, unless the bent copper had been released from his prison term, or escaped perhaps. I called the local police station and left a message for my friend there, Simon, to call me as soon as he could. There was nothing else I could do, I still needed a case but with the gorilla lurking around, how was I to know if any client might be the ‘business I needed to keep my nose out of’? Food makes me think better, so I decided to go down to my local café for a late breakfast. I had just arrived at the café and was about to go in, when my phone rang - it was Simon. I told him what had happened and asked if anyone involved in the previous case had been let out of

prison. He promised to look into it, but asked me to describe the gorilla to him. “Sounds like Arthur,” he told me. “One of Jim’s heavies. But they are into large scale thefts, safe cracking, that kind of thing. Not the sort of business you are normally mixed up with. Leave it with me and I will get back to you as soon as I can.” And with that he rang off and I headed for that ‘Full English’ that was waiting for me. Kate’s café was more crowded than normal, but my favourite place in the window was empty so having asked Kate for my usual, I sat myself down. I hadn’t been there long when a lady entered the café, looked around and then came over to where I was sitting. “Do you mind if I sit here?” She asked me. I could see there were no empty tables and there was plenty of room for her so I said yes, pleased to have the company if the truth were told. Kate came over for her order. “You’ve found him then,” she said as she arrived. “What would you like to order?” I looked at her, thinking about the gorilla and how she might fit into it all. She placed her order and then turned to me. “I’m sorry,” she said. “My name is Susan, I came in here earlier looking for you and Kate said she would tell you when you were next

in.” “She must have forgotten,” I replied. “How is it you think I might help you?” “I have a friend, Mary, who you helped before. She said you might be able to help me. My boyfriend, Jason, has been accused of stealing from the art gallery where he works,” she told me. “He has been there for almost ten years and it hurts that they think it could have been him, but they called the police when they discovered the theft and he was arrested. He was taken to the police station where they charged him.” Our food arrived then so I had some time to think. Simon had said the guys the gorilla worked for were into theft and safe cracking so was this the case I was to keep out of? “What is it he is accused of stealing?” I asked her between mouthfuls. “A gold amulet,” she replied. “As well as an art gallery, they are also a small museum and were lucky enough to be able to display the amulet for a month as part of their Egyptian display.” “If it was valuable, was it not guarded?” “Yes, they brought their own secure cabinets, and there were guards there when the exhibition was open.” “So how and why do they think he

might be involved?” “He’s a key holder and the theft was at night. And the police say there was no break in.” “There must be other key holders surely?” “Yes, but they all have alibis for the night in question so they ended up accusing him.” “You don’t live together then?” I asked. “So you can’t vouch for his whereabouts that night?” “No, we have been friends for a long time, but only started being more serious a few months back.” It was beginning to sound like it could be the case I was supposed to avoid, but I have never liked being told what to do, gorilla or no gorilla. “I take it he is locked up on remand?” “Yes, he sees a magistrate next week and then he might get bail, but for now, I am all the real help he has. They have appointed a solicitor, but he doesn’t seem to be that good.” “I’ll be honest with you,” I said. “I had a visit from someone who told me to keep my nose out of what I think might be this case.” I saw the look of disappointment on her face and continued. “But I have never liked being bossed about so although I will need to be a bit more careful than normal, I’ll see what I can find out for you. You will need to tell me all you can about

the gallery and also your boyfriend. She told me all I needed to know for the time being and gave me her phone number before leaving me to finish my late breakfast. I have to admit I was feeling nervous about the man mountain, but I can never turn a case down, I need the money. I waited until I got home before phoning Simon again and filling him in. “Well we do have the guy here if you want to talk to him,” he told me. “The only thing against him really is that he does have a record from a long time back, and he has no alibi for that night.” He paused, “Do you think this might be connected with the visitor you had?” “I think it might do, but I am still at a loss as to how they might have known I could get dragged into it before I had even met Susan. What is this Jason’s previous?” “His biggest problem is he gets mixed up with the wrong crowd. He is easily led. When he was a teenager he got done for some petty thefts, then he did some thefts from offices, but nothing very big. But he has a brother who is connected to Jim and his thugs, so there is a connection there.” “But how did they know I might get involved?” “Maybe when we find that out, we

might find out who really did the theft,” Simon said, confirming that he didn’t think Jason was the one. “Susan told me that it was Mary who had recommended me to her,” I told Simon. “Do you remember, she was the one that helped with the corrupt councillor. Could there be a connection there?” “I’ll look into it and get back to you,” Simon told me and rang off. It was actually only an hour before Simon called me back. “Mary has a cousin who we think is involved in Jim’s setup. It is possible that she told him about the theft and said she was recommending you. Maybe you had best have a chat with her,” he suggested. I thanked him and rang off before calling Mary. “Thanks for recommending me to Susan,” I said after I had told her who I was.“ “I wasn’t sure it was up your street, the police should get it straightened out, but she was so upset I had to do something to try to help her. I had spoken to my cousin first, but he had told me to leave it to the police. But he hadn’t seen how upset Susan had been.” “Well thanks,” I said. “I will do what I can to help her anyway.” I called Simon back and told him what Mary had said. “Can I come in and have a chat with this Jason?” I asked.

“Of course, I am here until 2 so come before then if you can.” I decided to go straight there and Simon took me to the cell where Jason was. I got straight to the point. “How much are they paying you to take the rap for this theft?” He looked at me straight in the eye and I could see he was more scared of them than he was of me. “You’ll go down for maybe ten years, lose any hope of a job afterwards, and probably lose Susan as well,” I told him. “Is it worth it?” “I’ll still be alive,” he said. “I’ve met Arthur,” I said. “And I don’t like the idea of being on the wrong side of him either. But I also don’t like being threatened so I plan on bringing them down, whether you help or not. If you change your mind I am sure Simon will be pleased to listen.” Simon called me again that evening. Jason had decided to talk and the investigation had moved on to Jim and his gang. Jason was still on remand, but that was more for his protection than anything else. I called Susan and told her that things will be OK and to talk to Simon. And there I left it. I had done my job and it really was up to the police now. Hopefully my gorilla friend would also go down with the rest of them.

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Fire Safety Over this last month, I have received several suggestions asking if I could do a piece on fire safety, due to the house fire in Gretna several weeks ago and people would like to know what to do. One of those people was my walking guide Bob, we love your feedback and suggestions so keep them coming. I hear you say to yourself I’ll think I’ll skip this section of the magazine, I think the most boring topics to watch, read or listen to are Fire Safety, health and safety and First aid Courses but all can save a life, yours or someone else’s. And I can promise you my first aid courses are never boring and are very interactive. Let’s be honest, a fire can start anywhere, at anytime, and in any type of property regardless of its age. So what can we do? It is impossible to guarantee a fire will never happen, but we can take precautions to try to avoid one, and we can do things to slow it

By Al Docherty down if the worst should happen. You will see from most of my articles that I always write ‘just take that extra minute to do things right’, ‘put things away’ and now ‘switch things off if your not using them’, especially at night. Are you one of those people that have things charging up over night while your asleep? I used to do this until I realised the risks. ‘But what if my phone battery runs out,’ I hear you say? Just charge it up a little before you go to bed, then switch it off over night and switch it back on in the morning when you wake up for the rest if its charge. It not only saves you money but it could save your life and your family’s lives. Another thing I I always, always do is close every door at night before I go to bed. This can prevent a fire spreading that much quicker and keeps the smoke at bay giving you extra time to get you and everyone else out.

Everybody’s home is at risk of fire. It’s important to know how to reduce the chances of fire happening in your home and, if it does, how to protect yourself. Cooking accidents, overloaded sockets, faulty appliances, smoking and drinking are just some of the reasons why there are so many house fires in Scotland. One lapse, such as leaving a pan unattended or failing to put out a cigarette properly, could change your life forever. There were twenty four thousand four hundred and seventy fires in 2019-2020 that’s an average of 67 fires per day in Scotland!!!!

Eleven out of 12 unbranded USB travel adaptors from four online retailers also flunked safety tests.

Faulty phone chargers and power banks sold online are potentially lethal fire hazards, a watchdog has warned. Shoddy, unbranded items listed on four sites – including Amazon Marketplace and eBay – failed stringent safety tests. Many items could put users in danger of electric shocks. Let’s face it, lots of products may be purchased in the UK but many thousands and thousands of sellers addresses are in China.

Do you know about the new law on Fire and Smoke Alarms that came into effect January 2019?

•

One smoke alarm installed in the room most frequently used for general daytime living purposes.

The study from Which? found eight out of 12 cheap, copycat Apple USB chargers from several sites including Amazon and eBay could be hazards.

•

One smoke alarm in every circulation space on each storey, such as hallways and landings.

•

One heat alarm installed in every kitchen.

•

All alarms should be ceiling mounted and interlinked with

Seven failed tests to check if they were able to handle a set voltage and still work safely, the probe revealed.

Almost half of power banks with no label had faults that could lead to them bursting into flames Buy locally from reputable shops and always check to see if they have the British kite mark, see the picture.

Q: What is the new fire and smoke alarm standard and how many alarms are required to meet the standards? A: The new standard requires:

one hard wired and the rest can be wireless. This legislation was introduced in January 2019 (don’t worry this has been extended to February 2022 because of the pandemic) and will ensure that everyone in Scotland has the same level of protection whether they own or rent their home. The implementation may have been delayed, but please don’t wait until the last minute. They have to be installed by a qualified electrician in accordance with BS7671. Once you have chosen which system to install, choose a reputable brand, make sure the packaging clearly displays compliance with BS EN14604:2005 for smoke alarms and BS 5446-2:2003 for heat alarms. There are a number of reputable electricians in Gretna some are Bob Dent, David White Electricals and a guy I have used before Ben Hetherington these will give you all the necessary information. Ten tips by Scottish Fire & Rescue 1. If there’s a fire in your home, close the door where the fire is. This will help protect your escape route and stop the fire spreading so quickly. 2. Think about how you would get out of the house if you were to have a fire, and practice so

you’re prepared. 3. Keep low. The air is cleaner and cooler near the floor. 4. Never open a door if it’s warm to the touch. 5. Never use a lift. Always take the stairs. 6. If your clothing catches fire; stop, drop and roll. If it’s someone else use a blanket, rug or thick coat. 7. Don’t stop for valuables. 8. Shout ‘Fire’ to warn your family or passers by. 9. Never try to go back inside until a firefighter tells you it’s safe. 10. Never jump out of a window from an upper floor. Stand by a window so firefighters can see you. But if you’re on the first floor you may be able to lower yourself down on to cushions or pillows. Remember: get out, stay out and dial 999 Have you made an emergency escape plan? Think about how you would get out of the house if you were to have a fire. The first choice is always through the main door, closing it once everyone’s out. But if it’s not safe to leave by the

main door, how else could you escape? It doesn’t take long to plan and it could save lives. Practising helps everyone stay calm if there is a fire. It also helps you get to safety quicker. • •

Is there another door you could use or a fire escape? Could you climb out of a ground floor window?

If you, or someone you know is over 50 years old and smokes and either lives alone, has mobility issues or uses medical oxygen, they need your help to identify them to the fire service. This make it easier for the fire service and highlights possible problems that they may cause in a fire. Fire can happen to anyone. But it is the Fire Service’s job to help make sure your home is as safe from fire as it can be. This is

why we provide free Home Fire Safety Visits. Our staff can help you spot possible fire hazards, sort out a fire escape plan and provide information about smoke, heat and carbon monoxide alarms. Visits are easy to arrange. A Home Fire Safety Visit can be organised at a time that suits you, day or night. The Service would also like community members to think about anyone they know who could be at risk from fire. It could be a friend, relative, or neighbour. To book a free Home Fire Safety Visit for you, or for someone you know: CALL 0800 0731 999 or visit firescotland.gov.uk or ask one of the amazing crew here in Gretna they will be glad to help you. I hope you have enjoyed this article and stay safe. Al Docherty

What’s Wrong With Politics? Clearly, in a country with in excess opinion that challenged the party of 2,000 food banks operating, line. I am realist enough to know something has gone very wrong. that humans will always assemble in groups, so political groupings The pandemic can be blamed for will occur and would be impossible some of the problem, of course, to stop. But the real culprit is the but food banks had reached party whip, the mechanism where record levels across the UK well MPs are forced to vote the way before the virus became the their party determines, and not the dominant issue. And the UK has way their constituents would like steadily become a more violent them to. country as well, with stabbings and even shootings becoming To me this approach to politics is more common in many areas. more like the way a criminal gang might operate - not as violent, but So why does the political system just as threatening. in the UK continue to fail us? And why do so If politicians So why does the political system wish to have the many people in the UK continue to fail us? feel it is public behind nothing to do with them any more them, then I believe the whip and believe they have become system must be removed and disenfranchised? while MPs will follow the overall line of the party to which they It is easy to blame one party or belong, they must be allowed to another for this - “the vote as they and their constituents Conservatives have done this” or wish. Then, and only then, will the “Labour never do that” - but general populous begin to regain perhaps the blame really lies in any faith in their government or in the very existence of a party the very system that allows them system. A true democracy would to operate. allow an individual to speak to a representative, who would then And we must also make knowingly speak on their behalf in lying to the public or in parliament parliament. But with the system in a criminal offence. Boris is a serial place in the UK, the individual MP liar, this has been shown so many we speak to is not free to speak times, and there is even a website on our behalf if it contradicts listing some of his lies at whatever the party in power is https://boris-johnson-lies.com deciding to do, even if they Have a look, it might open your wanted to. And in recent times, eyes, it might even improve MPs have been removed from democracy. their party for daring to voice an

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How Much Money Will You Have At The End Of The Month? Not Enough? Did you know that the more you understand about where your money goes, the more you will be able to keep? No matter how little or how much you have coming in each week or month, Mellow Media Budget can really make a difference and even leave you better off. And right now it is completely FREE

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Mellow Media Budget Few of us are in the position where we can spend our money without thinking about it, so we all need to keep an eye on where our money is going. But that can be easier said than done. We might have a credit card to pay off, hp or other credit repayments, rent or mortgage payments, gas bills, electricity bills . . .

accounts or credit cards which does mean you might have a little extra work to do. But I like to keep my security and I am sure you do too. Using Budget, you can enter repeating payments such as bills and loan repayments, incomes such as wages or benefits, one off payments such as supermarket or clothes purchases.

It is all too easy to get lost and end up spending Then your whole Budget is FREE for life if money we really financial situation is you register before the don’t have. And I displayed on a end of April 2021 know, I have been calendar (on there. smartphones it appears as a list). As someone who understands spreadsheets, I have tried to keep records that way, but it has never worked for me - too much to remember to do. So I looked online and found a number of apps and sites that offer to manage your money, but most of them want to link to your bank account and I am afraid I really am not sure I want a company I have never heard of having such access. So I developed Budget. It is a simple to use program that runs online in your browser. It has no connection to your bank

You can see at a glance how much you will have in the bank on any given day in the future so you can feel confident when you decide to purchase something that you will still have enough to pay the rent. Or if not, you will know not to make the purchase. Peace of mind for everyone, and right now anyone who registers before the end of April will have access for life - all completely FREE of any charges. So give it a try, you have nothing to lose and you could find your life becoming a lot simpler.

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Annan Travel Your local travel agent

Yes, you will go on holiday again 2020 was a difficult year but vaccinations are on track to open the world up again for us, and we all really need a break. There are bargains to be had, in the UK and abroad, so get in touch and start planning your next holiday.

Telephone 01461 206803 Facebook: annan-travel annan Email: annantravel@barrheadtravel.co.uk

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You will find two free ebooks you can download from my site at

https://jeremy-smith.co.uk Binary Magic (ePub and Kindle) This short novel revolves around a man who inadvertently gets caught up in a crime syndicate. Almost getting killed he manages to escape but is pursued across the south east corner of the UK. It is a simple to read and hopefully enjoyable "yarn" of the old school. It is the first in a series of books which will be added as they are completed. Call Me James (ePub) A children’s book for all ages is how someone described this book. It tells the story of a young girl’s teddy bear and how he tries to make sense of the world of humans. His very literal understanding of our language leads to some amusing misunderstandings.

https://jeremy-smith.co.uk jeremy@jeremy-smith.co.uk 21

Free Online Easter Holiday Activities For tickets: Go to www.eventbrite.co.uk and search for Devil’s Porridge Museum

Historical Re-enactor Sessions April 3rd 11am April 3rd 2pm April 4th 11am April 4th 2pm April 10th 11am April 10th 2pm April 11th 11am April 11th 2pm April 11th 5pm

Growing up on the Home Front Treating Tommy Shock Meet a ‘Tommy’ Treating ‘Tommy’: Amputations Air Intelligence Eating like a soldier Treating ‘Tommy’: Gas, shells and the body Treating ‘Tommy’: Medical evacuations Your Artefacts and Stories

Email: info@devilsporridge.org.uk Phone: 01461 700021 22

The Devil’s Porridge The Devil’s Porridge Museum is taking Easter holiday activities online this year. From an Easter Egg scavenger hunt to a series of opportunities to ‘meet’ people from history, there is something to interest everyone. “We’ve been holding regular

free online talks” said Judith Hewitt, Museum Manager, “These have proven really popular with audiences from as far away as America. Lockdown means that we can’t do our usual school holiday activities but we are adapting and taking things online where possible.” The Museum is also in the midst of a major research project into people connected with HM Factory Gretna in World War One. “This has led to some really interesting findings. We discovered that the captain of the women’s football team at Gretna also

New information recently came to the light about the women’s football team at HM Factory Gretna

Join the museum team for a virtual Easter egg scavenger hunt

family connections with the Factory. The more we share, the more seems to come forward and we are enjoying seeing photos, objects and family legends connected with HM Factory Gretna. If you know anything, please do come forward. Your account will matter to us and may be included in our film and exhibition on ‘The People of the Factory’ (planned for the end of 2021).”

played at Wembley in the 1920s!” continued Judith. “Lots of people attended our research project launch event and shared their

Some of our amazing volunteers

“We hope to re-open the Museum at the end of April and will have a new exhibition on display then about Dorothee Pullinger, a famous female engineer who opened the Galloway Car Factory near Kirkcudbright in the 1920s. More details coming soon!” finished Judith.

If you miss an event, they can be found on The Devil’s Porridge Museum youtube account, just go to youtube.co.uk and search Devil’s Porridge Museum or click on this link: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtRQK-LR7Xg1jQENzMQoVFw

Calling All Veterans and Serving Members of the Armed Forces Do you miss the forces’ banter and camaraderie?

breakfast club.

Well look no further, we are planning to make a breakfast group of veterans & serving members local to Gretna. We are hoping to have this set up in Gretna once we are able to mix again.

If you’re

Service people have a special humour and outlook on life and a get together each week will give us the chance to continue this, like in our service days. Pop in for a brew or a bit of scran but most of all stay for the banter. I’ll guarantee you’ll love the

interested let us know or please pass this on to someone you know who’s a veteran or maybe still serving. If there’s a business in Gretna that would like to host this please get in touch. Email me or contact me aldocherty@ymail.com or 07828 990 508

Are your carpets looking a little tired? Your chairs in need of a spruce up? Then get in touch and we can bring them back to life again. We pride ourselves on our workmanship, here are just a few of the comments we have received from our many happy customers. “Brilliant job, sofas came out like new, would definitely recommend“ “Done a brilliant job on our hand me down couch, looks brand new! Definitely recommend 5*” “Mark made an amazing job of our carpets today 100% recommended carpets are spotless & smell great!! thanks again much appreciated.“ “Absolutely delighted, my suite is like new. Very prompt service and great price, thanks again.”

Military Quiz Part 2 16 How many of those are Royal Army personnel? A. About 83,000 B. About 25,000 C. About 100,000 17 How many are in the Royal Navy and Marines? A. About 30,200 B. About 10,000 C. About 60,000 18 The Royal Air Force has how many personnel? A. 12,017 B. 45,604 C. 32,106 19 Who is a member of the Royal Air Force? A. Charles, Prince of Wales B. Prince William, Duke of Cambridge C. Prince Harry 20 Prince Harry served with what British Armed Forces branch? A. Royal Navy B. British Army C. Royal Marines 21 Prince Charles also had a career in what armed service? A. The Royal Navy B. The British Army C. The Royal Air Force 22 What is NOT a part of the Royal Navy? A. Surface Fleet B. Royal Fleet Auxiliary C. Underwater Corps 23 The British Army defends what British interests? A. England, Wales, India and Canada B. England, Wales, Scotland and Ireland C. England, Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland

24 What is the name of the RAF's headquarters of Air Command? A. RAF Halton B. RAF High Wycombe C. RAF Cosford 25 The RAF uses what aircraft? A. Typhoon FGR4 B. Boeing 757 C. Seaplanes 26 Does the British Army have a reserve army? A. No B. Yes c. Only for former Regular Army personnel 27 What new equipment is currently in the design or building phase for the British Navy? A. Submarines and seaplanes B. Frigate and aircraft carriers C. Aircraft carriers and seapods 28 What is NOT a corps of the British Army? A. Royal Army Choral Corps B. Royal Army Dental Corps C. Corps of Army Music 29 The British Army Gurkha Brigade is a holdover from? A. Britain's medieval times B. Britain's rule of Hong Kong c. Britain's war with Nepal 30. What does the Royal Marine's Special Boat Service do? A. Extremely critical and daring small-team missions B. Repair the boats of the Marine fleet C. Take tourists out on pleasure rides With thanks once again to Al Docherty for this interesting quiz.

16A, 17A, 18C, 19B, 20B, 21A, 22C, 23C, 24B, 25A, 26B, 27B, 28A, 29C, 30A

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Don’t Help The Thieves By Al Docherty Now that the weather is getting better and we are now out in the garden pottering around and planting flowers and bulbs for the coming year, we often forget to put the garden tools away back in the shed. What harm could it do right? Well opportunist thieves will see this as easy access. We have now become in the habit of leaving windows open on a sunny day when we go out, or leave the front door unlocked when you’re out in the back garden. They will use anything to get into your house and sheds. Spades, trowels and rakes are perfect tools for levering windows or doors open, here’s a few real examples of thieves using garden tools. An average shed has £550 worth of goods in it, get a good padlock and cover the windows up. Garden tools are expensive and there will always be someone wanting to buy “2nd hand” garden tools especially in summer. The first house was targeted in Chertsey Road between 9.30am and 7.45pm when thieves used a spade found in the back garden

of the property to force open a back downstairs window. A box containing a variety of jewellery, valued at £600, was stolen. Later that day between 10.30am and 6.15pm, again in Chertsey Road, thieves used a pitchfork and spade found in a shed in the back garden of a property. The spade was used to force open a window in the conservatory and burglars grabbed cash and four packets of tobacco from the kitchen The final incident in Rectory Lane took place between noon and 3.30pm. Items found in a garage toolbox — a screwdriver, hammer and chisel — were used to break into the home via the back kitchen window. A digital camera and camcorder, valued at £500, were stolen. So as you can see, we are making it very easy for thieves to gain access to our properties. Make sure your sheds are locked all the

time and tools are put away it only takes an extra minute. Lock up lawn mowers, ladders, barbecues and your wheelie bin, yes thieves will use your wheelie bin to get into open windows or take your goods away in them. Also on the increase is garden furniture and ornaments theft. Some furniture and ornaments costs hundreds of pounds so don’t make it easy for them to whip it away while your asleep in bed, bolt them down make it harder for them, put bricks in your garden pots making it too heavy for them to be easily stolen. As the weather gets better and we are all out after lockdown blowing the cobwebs off, don’t leave your deliveries in the garden or at the

back door ask a neighbour to take them in, also don’t leave your car windows open to cool down or leave expensive sunglasses or items in your car on show. Buy a car window vent guard which sits inside your window and allows you to have your window open securely. Also check your insurance for covering your shed and garden furniture and ornaments, you’re not always covered on standard insurance policies and leaving them in plain site on show may also invalidate any claim, try a specialist garden insurer. Regards Al Docherty

Heather Berry Artist and Poet

Facebook – Heather Marie Arts Twitter – Heather Marie Arts Etsy.com – heathermariearts17 34

Heather Berry Recently I have been developing my 'Above and Below Series' with a few new additions, I think my love of nature, geology and the world in which we live is pretty much a focal point of my current work and the confinements of Lock Down brought emotions of feeling trapped and the longing for freedom in the world in which we live. 'Cosmic Universe' and 'Earth's Core' are kind of opposite ends of the world and kind of bring together the 'Above and below' series of paintings. I have also been working on My Dream Series with 'Sweet Dream' 'Vivid Dreams' and 'Candy Dreams'. This is partly representative of my Love of Fantasy, Fairy tales and Psychology, and partly an escape from reality and the world as we know it. I will be developing this series further in the near future and hope to exhibit my work in a local gallery should I find gallery representation. You can see Heather’s work by following the links on her advertisement on the previous page.

Puzzles Pages

Easy

Medium

Hard

Very Hard

Solutions are on the inside back cover. You can also print these pages with a plain background if you go to our website https://tickledsquirrel.com

Across 1. Le�uce dish 6. Tins 10. Heroic narra�ve 14. Anguish 15. Mob scene 16. Colours 17. Group of rooms 18. Aggravates 20. Of sound mind 21. Skirt border 22. Rest 23. Biblical mount 26. Adjust again 27. Scheduled 30. Modern Persia 32. Comforted 33. Actor ____ Baldwin 34. Paid athletes 38. Less refined 40. Water�ght coa�ng 42. Chef's measures (abbr.) 43. Koppel and Turner 45. Zi�, e.g. 46. Common skin problem 47. Dictator 48. Skims over 52. Vouch for 54. Aloha State 56. Steal from 57. Memorable periods 61. Liveliness 63. Got up 64. The ____ Star State 65. Cleveland's lake 66. Smooth 67. Table parts 68. New York baseball team 69. Flawless Down 1. Brashness 2. Spanish water

3. Meat cut 4. Aardvarks 5. Colour 6. Town's announcer 7. Fast le�er transporta�on 8. Neither's partner 9. Mix 10. Figure 11. Cars 12. Silly ones 13. Desirable quality 19. Gull's kin 21. Possessed 24. Lips�ck shades 25. Curl 27. Church group 28. Vietnam's neighbor 29. Right away (abbr.) 31. High card 33. Sports site 34. Patched a ceiling

35. Scrape roughly 36. Informed of 37. Right away! 39. List-ending abbr. 41. Gorillas 44. Motor City 46. Tibet's con�nent 47. Society gal 48. Will 49. Indian boat 50. Astonishing 51. Designates 53. Pitches 55. List entry 58. Wander 59. Floa�ng 60. Broker's advice 62. Intense rage 63. "The Greatest"

Puzzles For Children

Can you fit these words into the grid below? Hint, start with the 6,7 and 8 letter words where there is only one of that length, then you can use these letters to help with the rest.

Another maze for you to find your way through

Boggled puzzles are very easy to play. You need to find as many 3 or more letter words as you can. You form words by starting anywhere on the grid and moving to adjoining letters. You can move horizontally, vertically and diagonally in any direction. Write down your words and score as follows: 3 letters = 1 point

6 letters = 4 points

4 letters = 2 points

7 letters = 5 points

5 letters = 3 points

8 or more letters = 6 points

Bill’s Tunisian Rescue Elizabeth was at school again and the toys were sitting around in her bedroom chatting about some of the adventures we had had. “Do you know,” Francis said. “These adventures really only started when you joined us James.” I was surprised and said so, but the other toys agreed with him. “It was pretty exciting when you rescued me,” Bill agreed. “And we had a big adventure catching those thieves afterwards,” Francis added. The other toys wanted us to tell the story again. It had only been Francis and I that had gone on this adventure, although once we had rescued Bill he was with us for the big adventure of course. “Do you remember how excited you were and how you had hidden in Elizabeth’s case so you couldn’t be forgotten?” Francis reminded me. “I remember being worried about the aeroplane as well,” I said. “There were so many people all wanting to go inside and I didn’t think we would all fit, but we did.”

“And those machines we had to go through where we could see each other’s insides,” Francis said. “But tell the story James, and I will chip in if you forget anything.” “OK,” I agreed. “It all began when Elizabeth came home and told us that we were going away on holiday, and we were going to fly there. But I didn’t understand and thought I had to be able to fly myself, I had never seen an aeroplane.” Everyone laughed, they had all been confused themselves when they first went on holiday with Elizabeth. “Anyway,” I continued. “Once we were all inside the aeroplane it raced down what I thought then was a large road but Francis told me it was called a runway, and then leapt into the air. It was very exciting and a bit scarey at the same time. Then we went up through the clouds and into the bright sunshine. I will always remember that, it was very beautiful.” “Do you remember when we landed?” Francis said. “There was a great big bump and you were worried in case your stuffing had come loose.” “I do,“ I replied. “I was really quite worried but you checked for me in

that thing at the airport when we came home.” “But tell us the story about how you found Bill and how you rescued him,” one of the other toys asked. “Sorry,” I said, “I got carried away. Well we arrived in Tunisia and after meeting up with the lady from the holiday company, we made our way to some big buses which then took us to our hotel. It was very hot and the there were some very strange looking trees as well. ”Everyone changed their clothes so they were not as hot and we went down to look at the sea. I remember falling asleep and waking up at the dinner table in the hotel - I must have been very tired after the journey.” “I fell asleep as well,” Francis said. “I think it was the heat as well as the journey.” “After we had eaten, we went down a road to where there was a port, with lots of great big boats. There were shops there as well,

and cafés and bars. We sat at a bar and had drinks,” I continued. “There was one boat that was offering to take people out to see the dolphins. I got very confused about its name as Elizabeth said it was a cat and a meringue. But that soon got sorted out when she explained it was a catamaran, a special boat with two hulls so it was wider than normal and rocked about less than a normal boat. “And then we walked back to the hotel and went to bed.” “But, of course, we didn’t sleep because we were too excited,” Francis said. “And once Elizabeth was asleep, we made our way out to the balcony to see what we could see.” “There were hundreds of stars I remember,” I said. “And then we noticed a small teddy lying in the corner of the balcony that was below ours. He looked like he might be hurt, so we needed to find a way of getting to him.” “I had been there for ages,” Bill said. “I had hurt my leg and the boy who was supposed to look after me just threw me onto the

balcony and left me there.” “We decided that we needed a rope so we could climb down to get him and see if he was alright,” I continued. ”But where could we find a rope? I then remembered that film we had seen on TV where some people had tied sheets together to climb out of a window.” “But you couldn’t really go and get the sheets from the beds without waking everyone up,” Francis pointed out. “So we went and found some towels and between us we managed to get some tied together. We then tied one end to the railings on our balcony and threw the rest over the side.“ “It’s a good job we teddies and soft toys can’t get hurt if we fall,” Gerry the giraffe said. “It would not be a good idea for a person to climb down a rope like that.” “No,” I agreed. “We might find it upsets our stuffing, but no human should try what we did. “Anyway,” I continued, “I then suggested I should be the one to climb down as I was the youngest and might find it easier.” “I was very happy to agree to that,” Francis agreed.

“When I got to the balcony below, I found Pete looking very sad and he had a wonky leg, where it had been caught on something and ripped.” “That was why he threw me out,” Pete said. “I am so glad now because I have such great friends, but I do feel sorry for any other teddies he might get.” We were all silent then for a while, thinking of how lucky we all were to have such a lovely owner. It was Pete who spoke first. “I was feeling very much better then, with James with me, but my wonky leg meant that there was no way I would be able to climb up the towels, so James tied the corners of the bottom towel together to make a bag at the bottom and then he helped me into it.” “I then climbed back up the towels, it wasn’t easy for me so Pete really would have had a problem. Once I had got to the top, Francis and I pulled with all our strength and managed to pull the towels back up with Pete safely inside.” “We then all climbed into the spare bed and fell fast asleep,” Francis said, yawning as he

remembered how tired we were. “Elizabeth was really surprised when she woke up in the morning to find me there,” Pete said. “Yes, but she was pleased to see you. We told her how we had found you and she was worried as to how to tell her parents, do you remember?” Pete said. “And you suggested she say she found us on the balcony, she didn’t need to say which one.” “They were surprised when they came to wake Elizabeth up,” I said. “But Elizabeth’s mum said she had a small sewing kit in her room and she would soon have Pete’s leg mended.” “It was so good to have my leg mended,” Pete said. “I was soon able to walk properly again.” “But that wasn’t the end of the adventure was it?” Francis said. “No,” I replied. “And Pete proved himself quite a hero. “After breakfast we had all gone down to the beach and Elizabeth’s mum and dad had fallen asleep in the sun. Elizabeth was reading her book and was also falling asleep.

We teddies decided to go and explore the sand hills just behind us. “It was from there that we saw a man walking along behind the chairs where Elizabeth and her mum and dad were sleeping. He reached down and took something from Elizabeth’s mum’s handbag. “We called out but they couldn’t hear us so we rushed back and woke Elizabeth up and told her what had happened.” Francis joined in then. “She woke her parents and told them she thought she had heard something and had seen a man walking away from where they were. Her mum check her bag and told them her purse was missing.” “She was very upset of course,” I said, “and we went to the hotel manager who phoned the police who came and talked to us. We had told Elizabeth what the man looked like and she told the policeman. “When the police had left, Elizabeth’s dad suggested that we all went for a walk as

there was nothing much we could do unless the police caught him. So we headed along the beach towards the port where all the lovely boats were. “We went back to the bar where we had sat the previous evening and asked the waiter for some drinks. He had just brought them when we saw the man who had stolen the purse come in to the bar.” “I noticed him first,” Pete said, “and managed to tell Elizabeth. As the man was leaving he had to walk right past us and I jumped off Elizabeth’s lap and

managed to trip him up. “Elizabeth called out then and her dad and the waiter sat on him until the police came.” “And luckily Elizabeth’s mum’s purse was still in his pocket and her bank cards and other things were still there,” I added. “So Pete really did save the day.” “But then we had some more adventures,” Francis said. “We went out and saw the dolphins, and then we even managed to stop some smugglers. But that is another story for another day I think. Elizabeth will be home soon.

A Fun Quiz 1. Sunny Afternoon was a hit in 1966 for which group? 2. What is three cubed? 3. Which small Russian buckwheat pancakes are traditionally served with soured cream?

4. Who starred as Fitz in the TV series Cracker ?

5. In greyhound racing, what is the number of the trap corresponding to the orange jacket? 6. What type of bird is a gadwall?

7. Which metallic element can be taken orally to help with X-rays? 8. What colour are gorse flowers?

9. In snooker, which of the coloured balls has the second-lowest points value? 10. What is the name of Chief Wiggum’s son in The Simpsons ? 11. What is the vehicle called in the UK that Americans call a trailer? 12. Which cat breed takes its name for the old name for Ethiopia? 13. What do the initials ONO stand for in relation to selling? 14. The cornet belongs to which family of musical instruments? 15. Which Florida national park is split by a road called Alligator Alley? 16. On what part of your body would you wear an espadrille? 17. If you practised callisthenics what type of activity would you be doing? 18. What is produced by the lacrimal glands?

19. Which supersonic form of transport was introduced in 1976 and retired in 2003? 20. In which county is Stratford-upon-Avon?

Answers can be found inside the back cover 47

It’s Not Rocket Science Last month I said a little about the damage we are causing to our one and only planet. This month I want to talk about the Gulf Stream, the flow of water from the Gulf of Mexico, up the east coast of the USA and then (as the North Atlantic Drift) across the Atlantic Ocean to Europe. Over recent years, it has slowed down to its slowest speed ever recorded - but does this matter? If you look at a world map, you will see that the UK is on the same level as Canada, and yet we do not have the extremes of weather and temperature that Canada does. And that is because we have the relatively warm ocean current bathing our shores. But could this current stop? Yes it could. And what would happen if it did? No one knows exactly, of course, because we have no historical data, but there would be some obvious ramifications. The temperatures in the UK would fall considerably, with the likelihood of winter snow almost guaranteed and typical lows at night in January of -20. We grind to a halt if we get a couple of centimetres of snow, imagine the chaos of a couple of metres! And it is not just the warmth we

would lose. The weather patterns in the world are being changed by the increasing levels of the so called greenhouse gasses we are pumping into the atmosphere, but if we lower the temperature along the east coast if the USA and also across Europe, wind patterns would change - winds being caused by differences in temperature across the planet. And with changing wind patterns, our already unpredictable weather would become increasingly erratic. But the biggest risk we face from a loss of the Gulf Stream could be its effect on agriculture. I well remember a trip I made to the north of Sweden a few years back. The temperatures in this part of Lapland made growing potatoes almost impossible apart from on what they called the potato mountain. A tall hill with a south facing flat side which was where they had enough heat to grow them. So while we can our blessings that we can grow food and live a reasonably safe life here in the UK, can we also give thought to how we can stop the relentless destruction we are causing please, before it is too late.

Jokes Page A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, "You can have her shipped home for £5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land, for £150." The man thought about it and told him he just would have her shipped home. The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend £5,000 to ship your wife home when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only £150?" The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance." ==== Little Billy asks his dad for a telly in his room. Dad reluctantly agrees. The next day Billy comes downstairs and asks, 'Dad, what's love juice?' Dad looks horrified and tells Billy all about sex. Billy just sat there with his mouth open in amazement. Dad says, 'So what were you watching?' Billy says, 'Wimbledon.' ==== The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again. The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT. The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race. The next day, the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS. This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent. The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day: NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN. The bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for £10. The next day the paper read: NUN SELLS ASS FOR £10. This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.The next day the headlines read: NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE. The bishop was buried the next day. The moral of the story is .. . . Being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery & even shorten your life. So be yourself and enjoy life. Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll be a lot happier and live longer!

Mellow Musical Memories with Vince Tracy When we first started a magazine, back in Spain, we used to feature an article from Vince Tracy each month. We are pleased to be able to let you know that he is back writing for us again and his first article is below. You can find out more about Vince if you look at his website vincetracy.com I am looking back at April 1963 and Cliff Richard was at number 1 with Summer Holiday. I remember Eddie Thomason, a lad in our class, who looked like Cliff. He carried a comb in his back pocket and could whip it out of his back pocket and convert his quiff into an Elephant's trunk before you could say Jack Robinson. Why would anyone want to say that name? It was great seeing Cliff and co. travelling in their double-decker bus but for the average guy a holiday to Butlin's was about all we hoped for when it came to Summer holidays. I suppose I can only rely on my memory but the rule in our house was that half of our wages always went into the family pot. We didn't really view holidays as we have

done before Covid struck. Just behind Cliff in second spot was his backing band, The Shadows, with Foot Tapper. It was quite a feat for Hank Marvin and his colleagues to perform the Shads Walk whilst playing their music. I have used the Shads routine as a part of my Rockin Rupert cabaret which I have performed in America and Australia as well as in the UK. Hank and Bruce have always been great favourites of mine and I remember Leapy Lee telling me about meeting them very early on in London. This was when they had left the frozen wastes of the north east and were lodging in London. I would dearly love to chat with Hank Marvin as he is a hero of mine who really is a guitar legend. I did create a

podcast with the bass player from the Shadows in which Jet Harris told me he was the first musician to play an electric bass onstage. You can find the interview on my website. At number three Joe Brown sang 'That's what love will do.' Older readers might remember Joe cut off all his blonde hair to make it grow stronger and it came back to give him his very distinctive hairstyle. He was a cheeky chappie as the saying goes and sang quite unusual songs. His daughter, Sam Brown, was also to have a hit song many years later. At number 4 Billy Fury represented the Merseybeat sound with 'Like I've never been gone.' Billy has a statue on the waterfront in Liverpool and was always seen as a peer to Cliff and Elvis. His real name, Ronald Wycherley, is often

a pub quiz question and it is overlooked that he had as many hits as the Beatles in the 60s and he appeared in several films. The anniversary of his death is still celebrated by his legions of fans in Liverpool. Billy never had a number 1 hit and died at an early age from heart problems which he'd had since he was a child. The Beatles were buzzing at number 5 with their own unique sound of Please Please Me. They were exciting times for young Merseysiders as the Beatles were leading the charge to take over the British charts and there was a buzz around the city every time they released a new song. It was probably around this time that I saved enough to buy myself a

Beatle jacket which looked very much at home in the Cavern. The American Bobby Vee brought his 'Night has a Thousand Eyes' to our ears at number 6 and it was a great song to hear on Radio Luxembourg or maybe Radio Caroline. It was not really a great song for the clubs and dance venues but great for radio play. The same could be said for the Springfields at number 7 where we were mesmerised by Dusty, the girl singer with this folk trio. It was still nice to see a double bass being played but a girl singer with her eyes caked with mascara who had a husky voice. Wow! The Bachelors were at number 8 with Charmaine and they also had a bass player and could play harmonicas and guitars. I made podcasts with both Dec and Con Clutchey although this was long after the brothers had split from the group's third member John Stokes. As the Harmonichords they had been a successful harmonica act in

Ireland and appeared on Opportunity Knocks on Radio Luxembourg before changing their names and having a string of great hits during the 1960s in Europe, Australia, South Africa, South America, parts of the USSR, and the United States. Among the most successful were "Charmaine" "Diane" "I Believe", "Ramona" and "I Wouldn't Trade You for the World". American duo Paul and Paula were at number 9 with 'Hey Paula' and at number 10 was the Australian heart throb Frank Ifield with Wayward Wind. I first met Frank when I compered his show at the Hamilton Club in Birkenhead around 1974. I then met him in Cornwall before eventually making a podcast with him when I worked for Onda Cero radio here in Spain. Frank really was a tremendous singer and yodeller and returned to spend the last part of his life back home in Australia. You can find the podcasts I mentioned at my website www.vincetracy.com

With our thanks to Vince for his article so full of memories

Do You Know A Local Hero? Over the last few months we have all experienced difficulties and hardships in one way or another due to lockdowns and the virus. There are many tales of people who have supported and helped the more vulnerable in our society and we would like to include some of these exceptional people in our pages. It might be someone who has been helping a vulnerable person get their shopping. Or perhaps someone who has been working tirelessly for our overworked NHS. Maybe you know someone who is delivering medicines for people who are self isolating. They, themselves will not think they are special, but the people they are helping know how much these people are making a difference to their lives. If there is someone you think deserves a mention then please let us know about them and how we can contact them. Anyone put forward will be contacted by us before we published anything but we think it might be a nice way to give these people some of the recognition they deserve. Please send any recommendations to editor@tickledsquirrel.com

Do TV Soaps Reflect Society Or Influence It? A large number of people in the UK watch TV soaps. Now I will say straight away that I am not one of them, but I respect people’s right to watch what they wish to, and I hate censoring of what people can watch based on a small group’s idea of what is OK and what is not. But my question is whether soaps follow society or are in fact influencing it. It is well known that most young people look up to the “influencers” on social media, we only have to look at incidents like the unfortunate young ladies who ended up with Gorilla Glue in their hair to see how much influence these people have. And if we go to an extreme, look what happened when Trump spouted his lies and white supremacy hatred and stirred up his followers - almost an attempted coup. Yes, people are far more easily led than they would like to think. Most of us have heard of brain washing. At its most simple, this is simply a question of exposing someone constantly to an idea or a set of ideas, and eventually they will begin to believe it. It is how we

teach children to stay safe, how we teach them what is right and what is wrong. Soaps used to have fairly innocent story lines and dealt in a compassionate way with society’s ills, even attempting to show how “bad” people ended up being punished for their transgressions. More recently though, the small glimpses I have seen of programs such as East Enders, Emerdale and Coronation Street have shown real violence, anger, hatred and family violence. The producers say this is real life, but I truly hope it is not. Yes, I know it happens, but please God it is not the norm. Going back to the brain washing concept, if people watch these programs day after day, and see this violence, this hatred and anger day after day, will it not begin to become normalised? The same is often said about video games, and it might be true. But at least in a video game, most of the time it is set in an environment that is completely different to the player’s normal life. It might be a war zone, or a large violent city - hopefully these are not places the player is actually

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going to be in so they are well aware that it is fiction. My question regarding soaps influencing society is that what the viewer is watching looks just like their own home or work. They identify with the actors, they become part of their family. So seeing a husband abuse his wife, or the other way round, or seeing a drug dealer being beaten up by a rival gang of drug dealers, or someone subject to endless race or sexual harassment - and seeing this almost every day on TV. Is this making people immune to its horror? Making it “normal”? I don’t pretend to know the

answers, but I do know we are now in a more violent and crime ridden state than I can remember before. Either it is because of a lack of policing, or it is because people are changing, and if it is the latter, I think we need to get to the bottom why? Maybe the way soaps have changed in recent years is bringing about a more selfish society. Making people think violence is normal. I know people fell very unempowered now as democracy is steadily being unravelled, maybe it’s that. But whatever it is, we do need to think about it.

Gretna FC 2008

Season Ends With PPG After weeks of no football due to Covid 19 restrictions, the season was finally put out of its misery on 30th March. A number of proposals were put to clubs by the Scottish Lowland Football League Board and they considered the responses provided by member clubs. Nine clubs wrote to say the season should end and that enough games had been played for the league to be decided on a Points Per Game formula (PPG). Three clubs expressed a preference for the

season to be declared null and void. This constituted a majority of clubs in favour of the PPG recommendation. The Board therefore agreed that the League positions for season 2020/21 would be decided based on average Points Per Game. This formula saw Gretna FC 2008 finish in 13th position with a PPG of 0.91. Discussions are now ongoing with the Scottish FA, SPFL and SHFL about possible dates for the Pyramid Play-Off competition.

All clubs competing in it will, under current Scottish Government requirements, be required to pay for PCR tests. There are several factors before relegation can be confirmed which includes waiting until the conclusion of the Pyramid and Lower Pyramid Play-Off competitions. Start date for season 2021/22 The Board has a start date of the weekend of Saturday 17 July 2021.

The final League table is pictured. We caught up with Gretna FC 2008 Chairman, Alex Thomson, and he stated that, "We are sorry to see the season end like this on a point system, and congratulations go to Kelty Hearts

FC for winning the league and my heart goes out to Vale of Leithen going out as they have. We wish them all the best". Alex went on to talk about the ground and the future, "It is so sad that all the work done inside the ground wasn't seen by our fans but next season we should have our new 4G pitch installed, the sportshub and new floodlighting... exciting times". Our manager, chief executive and myself sat down recently for a brainstorm and have decided that we are going to appoint a scout, an assistant manager and strengthen our squad ready for next season. Keep safe all". Season 2 of the Gretna FC 2008 fans podcast will be starting in the next week or so to fill the void a little bit so keep an eye out for that. Finally, keep safe, enjoy the summer and hopefully we will see a large crowd and old friends on July 17... put it in your diary! Iain Martin

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2B or not 2B That Isn’t The Question By Paul Cowan That was going to be the question, as I was going to write this month about how I became an artist, however last weekend was a very very special birthday. My new liver became a year old. Combined with the change in legislation around organ donation this weekend I thought it pertinent to talk about the whole process. I have just been interviewed for a radio station on this very subject and I obviously have some strong opinions on the subject, so here goes. Just after New Year last year, a childhood illness, that I knew nothing about until an attack twenty years ago, that hospitalised me for the first time ever, that ended up with me being the only known survivor of the illness in history, that couldn’t be fixed with a transplant at that time, that resulted in me being told it will either fix itself or kill me, came back with a vengeance. This time around it decided to attack both my kidneys and my liver at the same time. Something I have just been told has never happened in respect of kidneys before. I was of course rushed into hospital in Dumfries first and then to the specialist liver unit in Edinburgh. They had to stabilise my kidneys before they could even think about

putting me on the liver transplant list. This took around two months. When the hospital got word that a lockdown was imminent they took the decision to place me on the transplant list on the evening of the 19th of March. Something unheard of before happened, seems like a trend with me, the doctors came back in my room thirty minutes later and asked if I had had any food for the last few hours, as they had a liver for me. The shortest time on a waiting list ever. They told me that they had one opportunity to give me a liver before the hospital was basically shut down for covid, also that if I didn’t take it I would of course, just, well, die! I was wheeled down to surgery at two a.m. on the 20th and they gave me a new liver over the next ten hours or so. Guess what - it worked. Which brings me up to date and the implementation of the new organ donation legislation. The previous system meant that should you wish to be an organ donor in the aftermath of your death, then you had to sign up as an organ donor, carry a card and be registered as such, preferably with the knowledge of your family, an opt-in policy if you like. Now the system has become an

opt-out decision. Fantastic stuff and it has been a long time coming. I will now give you a few reasons why we should rejoice at this. Firstly although many people are registered donors and carry the card, often they have either not informed their families or have gone against their families’ wishes to be prospective donors. This can cause a lot of confusion, delay and extra heartache at a point in life, and indeed, death, that should be avoided. Two, the timing of most organ donation isn’t very flexible unless the donor has been on a live giving machine before death, most donations come with the added heartbreak and surprise if you like, of a fatal accident. Thirdly, the old system was prone to mistakes and confusion over legal challenges from families, which had a tendency to roll on and make any possible donation attempt a mute point. Fourthly, may people have such good intentions when it comes to signing up for the donor register but, for many reasons, all understandable, just don’t quite get around to it, it’s human nature. The new system means that people will of course still have the choice to not become a donor. This is of course absolutely right, we have to have control of our own decisions in something so personal and important. We also have to consider that some people will not want to be donors for religious, mental health or purely personal

reasons. These conditions will of course be met and nobody should feel in the least guilty about making that choice. What the new legislation does is open up more people to the benefits and eventual satisfaction of giving another person the most wonderful gift in the world … life. My liver failure was not alcohol related, like a lot of people I liked a drink every now and then. After my liver transplant I would keep buying the odd beer and bottle of wine for my partner to enjoy and people would wonder how I could do it, or they would ask me if I ever fancied the odd beer myself. Of course I would love to sit on the front door step in the sun after work and have one good, cold glass of beer, like I used to. But I don’t, for one thing I have control over my urges and it of course doesn’t bother me as I have far more important things in my life. The main reason though is part and parcel of my discussion with you out there today. A family somewhere went through a personal hell to give the gift I received just over a year ago, a son, a daughter, a brother, a mother, a father experienced a pain that no person should, so that I can live and see my two boys again, watch them grow up some more, one more than the other mind you as the oldest is coming up for thirty five this year and the youngest will be thirteen. I will get

to see my lovely partner Jana every day and my family. I don’t know where my gift came from and I am never likely to, it will of course stay with the donors family for as long as they live. But I will tell you something right now, I have been registered as donor since I was

eighteen and all the people who really know me, also know that should I die, or have died throughout my life, they and me would be so proud if my death resulted in somebody else having another chance at life. Do the right thing.

Thanks to Paul once again for his excellent article. In these strange days of the pandemic, it is easy to forget where we should be placing our attentions. Life is a fragile thing and we should embrace every day of it that we are blessed to experience.

“From Works Of Art to a Log Burner, A Seat In The Garden to a Fire Pit Paul Cowan should be your First Call”

Facebook: Paul Thesculptor Cowan Email: paulthesculptor@hotmail.co.uk

Phone: 07581207988 63

Tech Tips

Installing Chrome OS on an old PC

Do you have an old PC that is really not working very well with Windows 10? Or maybe it still has Windows 7 or 8 on it? And have you ever wanted to try out a Chromebook but don’t really want to buy one right now? I have a not that old, but seriously underpowered Lenovo laptop that was behaving really badly and, in truth, was almost on the verge of being chucked out. It was so slow with Windows 10 that something had to be done. I have been a lover of Chrome OS for many years and I have missed my Chromebook for a long time, since it stopped working so I decided to try Chrome OS on my Lenovo. The way this is done is to use a USB stick to hold the new system and get the computer to “boot” from this instead of the hard drive. In that way you can try out Chrome OS and see if it will do what you want. If not, you have lost nothing but a little time. Google do not supply Chrome OS itself, so it is necessary to make use of a version that can be downloaded form a company called Neverware (now owned by Google). The version they supply

does not have access to Android apps that the more recent Chromebooks do, but I decided that this was not a show stopper for me. The first step will require an 8 or 16 Gbyte USB stick. I don’t know why but the literature says they do not like SanDisk devices. They also say it must be one of these sizes but I used a 32 Gbyte Sandisk stick and it worked fine. Everything on the USB stick will be erased so make sure you don’t have anything vital on it. The next thing to do is to go to the following address to get the new operating system. https://www.neverware.com/ freedownload#home-edition-install If you have windows 7 or later on the pc you are using then follow the left hand route on the page that opens. If you are using an alternative computer operating system then the other option is for you. Either way, full instructions are on the pages you have now opened. Once you have completed the steps and allowed time for the process to complete you will have a USB stick which can be used to

boot the computer from. But to get the computer to choose the USB drive to boot from does require a small change to the BIOS of the computer. This sounds far worse than it really is and you only need to make one small change. The way you access the BIOS varies from computer to computer so you will probably need to Google it for your particular computer. Just do a search for “Access the BIOS on my XXXX computer”, where XXXX is the name of your computer. Common ways are to press F2 or Del as the computer starts up, normally when the logo appears. Other ways include starting the computer, then holding down the Shift key as you do a restart. Just look it up for your computer. Once you are in the BIOS you can use the arrow keys on the keyboard to move around (the mouse will not work) and select the BOOT options. Then change the options so it looks at the USB first, then the Hard Drive as a second option. On most computers there will be instruction on screen as to which button moves the options forward or backward and you will see them move up or down in the list. You should end up with USB at the top, then the Disk drive. So if the computer sees a USB drive plugged in when it starts it will use it, if not it will start as before.

Then you just need to head for Save and Exit and the computer will restart. If the USB drive is still plugged in then it will boot into Chrome OS and you can enter the setup information it needs. Be aware that it will only be using the computer’s RAM for storage so it might have very little left for running anything useful. But it will allow you to experiment and see if you like Chrome OS. Because the computer was basically only of any use as a doorstop it was so slow, I then took the next option to install Chrome OS as the permanent OS for the computer so it could have the entire hard drive to use. To be honest, I wish I had done it months ago. True, Chrome OS will not run the software I use to make the magazine, but it does let me get on the internet, use Microsoft Office online, edit websites, play games and write books (using my favourite app Wavemaker). If you wish to use the USB drive for anything else afterwards, you need to use the Chrome OS recovery app which you can download and run on the new Chrome OS computer you now have or on any pc. You will see an option to recover the USB drive when you run the utility. jeremy@bydesignwebsites.com

If we have a bad experience most of us should learn from it We have a good experience and we feel amazing. A balance of both things gets us through life on an even keel….so why do so many of us go right down the pan and find it hard to fight feeling bad about everything in our lives?? Could it be that we hang on to the BAD experiences in our past? If that is so, why aren’t we feeling ecstatic about all the GOOD things that have happened in the past?? Why don’t we remember THEM and appreciate them instead of the bad things? Because we CHOOSE not to! Do you know that we all have the gift of 24 hours to think about what we want to think about? We have 24 hours to do what we want….respond in the way we want….behave in the way we want. Why then, do some of us get our lives into such a mess and then wonder why?? Perhaps because we lose sight of the fact that we can make all the necessary changes we need to if we want a better quality of life. As a baby,

someone else is in control. As an infant we cannot achieve what we want. As a young child, teenager, young adult maybe, we are not in control of anything but our reaction and attitude towards things, but as an ADULT!!!!!…come on! We can be the sort of person we want to be. We can choose to be good, bad or indifferent…..the power of WHO we are lies with us, and some of us don’t take that control, but we allow others to sit in the driving seat and dictate to us morning, noon and night. If we are in a position that is unmoveable, then all we can do is to have a positive attitude towards things, and perhaps realising that people on death row can do that might help us to think it is possible!! Successful business people, dynamic personalities, everyone you would be impressed with, they can have the problem of not taking control in their private lives…..

perhaps just thinking about where we are at this moment in time in our lives would be a solution to lots of things that are making us unhappy. The life we are living is the real thing…every day is important….why not make every day as good as we can? Put your self respect to the test….do you like yourself enough to want only the best?

You should, because you are the most important person in your life…. no one else can breathe for you… no one else can think for you…. without you, you would not exist!! How important does that make you??!!

Take care… till the next time! Violet King

With thanks to Violet for her interesting article once again. If you have a question you would like to ask her, please email us at the magazine and we will pass it on to her. editor@tickledsquirrel.com

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Book Review Another of my reviews of some of the books I have read and loved. They may not be “classics” but I think they are worth a read. In general, I read using either a tablet or a Kindle or a Kobo reader, but I have indicated in which formats the book is available. I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I did. The 39 Steps By John Buchan This book was written way back in the early 20th century. It is what would have been described, when I was a child, as a “ripping yarn” and is about the build up to the first world war and how spies worked in the UK as Germany made their plans. What I find so enjoyable is partly the large part of the book where our hero travels from London by train to Dumfries where he changes to a slow train on towards Newton Stewart, alighting in Galloway and then travelling by foot across the hills to the north. Then later when he travels with a cattle drover to Moffat. I might also have a love of spy stories due to the adventures my late brother had in Eastern Germany back in the 1960s and my

own connections with Cryptography in the 1980s, but whatever the reason, if you haven’t yet had the opportunity to read The 39 Steps I would definitely recommend it.

This is available as a paperback from all good booksellers and on Kindle, Playbooks, Kobo and almost every eBook store. Several films have been made of it, some closer to the book than others.

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Puzzle Solutions

Easy

Medium Fun Quiz Answers 1. The Kinks 2. 27 3. Blini 4. Robbie Coltrane 5. Five 6. A duck 7. Barium 8. Yellow 9. Yellow 10. Ralph

Hard

Very hard 11. Caravan 12. Abyssinian 13. Or nearest offer 14. Brass 15. The Everglades 16. On your feet 17. Keep fit 18. Tears 19. Concorde 20. Warwickshire