The Window Magazine, Edition 1

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The Window Magazine, Cotswolds Edition [1] It takes a village to pull this kind of magazine together, and we are hugely grateful to the following people for their input, support and encouragement. Anna Stead, from Thistle Moon, for her incredible illustrations throughout. Kate Ransome, from Little Cheltenham, for the amazing photographs including the one of us, above, and the cover. Our contributors: Kate Buckingham, Danielle Deschenes, Elle Kemp and Martin Gane, Sophie Jones-Cooper, Nicki Ryder, Danielle Blackburn, Natasha Willmore, Phil and Kelly James, Kate Dimmer, Katerina Draper, Louise Gill, Roseann Thompson, Lucy de Mello, Anna Ledingham, Ant Davies and ZoĂŤ Fisher, Matt Hall, Kate Skeet, and Sarah Wilkinson. Love and thanks to our families, and especially our husbands, for cheering us on and believing that we can do it. Printed on recycled paper by Tewkesbury Printing Company. The Window Magazine ISSN 2631-5793


Welcome to The Window Magazine. We just know you're going to love it here. This magazine has been produced with creative and editorial passion to fill a void in print media noticed by a group of business owners, who like ourselves are committed to serving the large population of families in the Cotswolds. Being a parent in this area is as lucky as seeing a shooting star, and this publication will help you see the wood for the trees in a forest that is so very very rich in support, information, and delight. We're your co-editors, Cate and Kate, and we have curated a collection of words and imagery that we hope will educate, inspire and nourish. We're big fans of traditional print journals and books and though we, as busy modern parents, spend lots of time consuming digital content we hope never to lose the slower, more mindful joy of settling down to read the printed word. Collectively we have six children ranging in age from two to sixteen but the parent we had in mind whilst creating our content has children aged from just a seed through to junior school. Perhaps, just like us, you are finding your feet as new parents, and seeing the world around you with new eyes. We know that time is generally a busy parent's most limited resource and it is with this in mind that we have decided on a nine-month publication cycle, which also reflects the amount of time it takes to bring a new baby into the world. This gives us plenty of time to plan only the very best articles and gives you plenty of time to read them at leisure. Edition 1 is published in the autumn and takes us right through until the summer. You'll note that the magazine is split into three sections: The Long Dark Night, New Growth, and Let In the Light, which give a subtle nod to the three seasons of its lifespan. We hope you'll enjoy the progression from autumnal hygge to endless light evenings. We know what an effect the time of year and the light that comes through the window has on family life. Light affects how parents enjoy time together (with and without the children) and as adults with our individual need for self-care. You'll also find space at the back of Edition 1 to note down your thoughts and observations as you read. We understand that a parent's mind is a busy space with so many tasks that must be remembered. We want the time you spend reading the magazine to be relaxing and thoughtinspiring and so we’ve given you some space to keep track of those precious fleeting thoughts and the little moments that make up our days. We hope you enjoy your time with The Window Magazine as much as we've enjoyed our time taking it from concept to print. We'd love your feedback. You can email us on thewindowmagazine@gmail.com and be sure to follow the #wednesdaywindow hashtag on Instagram (@thewindow_magazine) and Facebook (@thewindowmgazine). Thanks for opening The Window.

Kate and Cate


Window Shopping Life isn't all about what you own, and having children has certainly brought this into perspective for us, but we recognise that offsetting the (sometimes) uphill slog of parenting with a few treats and luxuries is important. Here are a few products, places and experiences that we love and have discovered since becoming parents. We think you just might love them too. Spotted by Kate: MOUNTAIN A gift for the person in your life who needs to know they are your rock. I am loving this HYMN 'Nevis' print navy tee-shirt from Nailsworth-based store Truce. Made from 100% soft cotton, this simple but striking tee is an option for even those seriously hard-to-please recipients. truceonline.co.uk

Spotted by Kate: MUSTARD

responsible for 300,000 tonnes of disposed textiles in the UK that can no longer be recycled as aid to Africa. Buy well but buy once. Statement pieces made from high quality fabrics are the fashion future. oliveclothing.com

Spotted by Kate: SNUGGLE Cotswolds-based designer Joss Muir is setting the world of nursery retail alight nationwide with her contemporary take on the traditional muslin square.

Literally coveting this versatile number in this must-have colour, and pretty sure it has a place in all four seasons. Teamed with some chic ankle-skimming jeans and pumps it takes everyday casuals up a gear. We're both big fans of Cheltenham store OLIVE and this piece is one of many that we know you’ll love.

Joss retails as Musthud Designs and uses a double layer of 100% cotton backed with white muslin. Her designs are available in four different sizes as well as a bib.

Remember, fast fashion in 2019 will be

musthud.co.uk

This gift for a newborn will be used well beyond the baby years.


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Spotted by Cate: IN A SPIN

Spotted by Cate: LEOPARD

After years of not riding a bicycle thanks to bumps and babies (on repeat), I have finally got the wind in my hair again on a locally-made Pashley.

The leopard trend doesn't seem to be going anywhere, which is lucky as this handmade leather Suffolk Satchel by Harriet Sanders in Cheltenham has been on my wishlist for aeons.

The basket and leather saddle are so stylish it doesn't feel like actual sport, but there are obvious benefits to cutting down on car journeys whilst ticking off a few errands. It's a bit of an investment piece but you'll see me whizzing off to the library on it for the next fifty years or so, and I’ll save loads on petrol, right?

I could save it for best, but I know I'd end up using it every day as it's roomy enough for some work files, my laptop, and a stash of after-school snacks. A multi-tasking masterpiece! The lining is available in pink, and this is a long-term love affair.

pashley.co.uk

harrietsanders.co.uk

Spotted by Kate: SPECS

Spotted by Cate: ANTHOLOGY

There has never been a better time to have less-than-perfect vision and I've been rubbing my hands together in glee eagerly awaiting my next eye test as an opportunity to visit Cheltenham independent opticians Harper and Cooper, the only local stockist of the much-coveted Victoria Beckham range of glasses.

If your favourite pastime is browsing for books that you then keep in piles at home to read 'one day' (the Japanese called it tsundoku) then having children means one wonderful thing – more people to pile up books for!

I'm torn between the heavy tortoiseshell and the more subtle shade of blush. What do you think? View the whole range at harperandcooper.co.uk

And there is nowhere nicer to browse than The Suffolk Anthology in Cheltenham, where owner Helene will make you feel right at home (and a coffee), while you explore the collection of books and gifts. Her last novel recommendation for me was spot on. And the children's section (pictured) is bound to create mini bibliophiles: my eldest loves coming here as much as I do. theanthology.co.uk

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Our journey begins By

closing the window, drawing the curtains & hunkering down for

the long

dark night. 7



Nocturnal Poem and linocut print 'Sleepy Fawn' by Kate Buckingham from @smudgedprints in Stroud.

I would gladly bend to gather fields-full of lavender if only the scent made your clear eyes blink. I read all those books cover to cover underlining what I am doing not doing doing too much of. I breathe out into my own tired fog Then bathe you Then feed you Then put you down, sleepy but utterly awake, on cotton on flannelette on fleece. Seasons pass us Daylight falters You swell plump in our love as street lamps bloom. My past slumbers swan into view, their simplicity seems sharp: the lie-in, the doze after reading, the early night. Envious, I shuffle them off to another land. This is sleep now. Our nights are not for spectators, they are not a steady incline to a destination. Babies' sleep is a dark dark thread, to be held by loving hands and so I am, little by little, gathering you inwards onto my soothing spool, to rest.

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Konmari with Kids Words by Danielle Deschenes. Pictures by Kate Ransome.

We all have that friend who is difficult to buy for. She reads everything Marie Kondo has ever written. She has watched all the TED Talks. She professes to be a minimalist, rarely shops, and values experiences over possessions. I am that annoying friend. As a child, I enjoyed organising and cleaning my room. Surprisingly, I also had friends. Sometimes I would clean their rooms as well! My room, flats, homes, have always been tidy and clean because that's just the way I am. I don't know how to be any different. Because I have moved a lot, across the country of Canada a few times, and now overseas to the UK, I have learned that being neat and tidy isn't really all that helpful if you are drowning in STUFF. For me, excess stuff equals stress. I spent years in a constant state of decluttering and getting rid of what I didn't need. It felt never-ending. It was when I discovered Marie Kondo and her method of only keeping items that 'spark joy' that I was truly able to tackle the clutter for good, and I have never looked back. I didn't discover The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying until my twins were nearly one. So I had three small children, and the thought did cross my mind as I was reading that I would be perfect at this if I were single, but how would I apply this with a family of five? Honestly, it was one of the most exciting books I have ever read. I apologise to everyone I spoke to about it whilst in my manic phase! My partner had to hear a lot about such things as 'storing socks: treat your socks and stockings with respect (p. 80).' I also decided to not buy myself any new clothing or footwear in 2014, and that drastic choice really jump-started everything. We need much less than we think we do. 11


The first thing you must do is visualise how you want to live. For me this also included recognising my privilege. If you are living a life of excess, recognise that. Realise that there are people who are struggling to provide their families with the necessities. Be grateful. When you have and acquire less, you can share more with others. You will have actual material possessions and money to donate and share, and eventually, when implemented properly, you will have more time and energy to share with others. I wanted a simpler life, less time spent tidying, more time spent being fully present with those I love. The Konmari method is dramatic. You have to be ready for a complete overhaul of your life. Once you have visualised how you want to live, you get rid of everything in your possession that does not 'spark joy'. I started with hugging each of my boys and my partner, and since they all sparked an immense amount of joy for me, they could stay. Kondo recommends that you go through one category at a time, starting with clothing, then books, then paper, then miscellaneous items. The last category is sentimental items. Starting with clothes, put all the clothes that you own in a pile on the floor. This is great for seeing HOW MUCH you own. It can be astounding! Pick up each item one at a time. If it sparks joy for you, keep it; if not, discard. Then put all your joy items back in one place, using Kondo's perfected methods as outlined in her book. Continue through each category. Marie Kondo recommends doing this for a few days until it is done, or if you must, book the next three weekends or so to devote to the process.

The most difficult category for me is books. They spark a lot of joy in my life. Marie Kondo recommends that you keep your books all in one place. This is the one Kondo rule that I break, as I have books in every room of our home (placed neatly of course), but I like everyone in my family to have a book that sparks joy always at an arm's length. I did get rid of books that I had kept to 'read someday', because as Kondo states, 'someday [often] means never.' I also started giving away books to friends that I enjoyed, but knew I would not read again. So even in my most difficult category, I reduced the books I own by at least 50%. But what about toys? There is no Marie Kondo chapter on toys, and you can’t just get rid of all your children's playthings, as tempting as that may be! My children are currently eight years old and five years old (twins). They are all boys. They do pick up their toys when asked. Okay, prodded. Okay, sometimes bribed or threatened. I have tried to go through toys with them, and as you would guess, they wanted to keep everything. So, about once a month, I gather the toys that they have not been playing with, put them in a bag, and hide them in the garage. If after a month, if they have not asked for those toys back, or not even noticed that they were gone, I donate them to charity. This method works very well for us. A few toys have made it back into the house by request of a child, but most of those toys are gone forever. I do talk to my boys about how not all children have nice toys to play with and we should share some toys that we don't play with anymore with those children. My dream is that someday they can make this decision on their own. My eight-year-old is autistic and a natural minimalist and really only wants a few books and his iPad. I should be learning from him! I do think that the heart of the Marie Kondo method is gratitude. If you are grateful for every item in your home, you will have more peace. Many people like to send me such jokes as, 'I tried the Marie Kondo method and so far, I've got rid of my bra, my treadmill, and my husband.' Listen, if those things really don’t bring you joy, get rid of them! Life is short! However, I would argue that after reading Marie Kondo's book, you would realise that having respect for the things in your life, as well as gratitude, should be taken into account. Your bra, treadmill, and husband all do valuable work, maybe try to be grateful for how they help you and you might find more joy!


The Konmari method is not about minimalism, not really. Some people will have more physical possessions that spark joy, and will therefore have more stuff. Some people are happy with much less. Both are fine. The idea is that you only have what makes you happy, brings you joy, and contributes to a peaceful life. Your possessions should not bring you stress. I find it a very positive way to live. I don't let anything into my house that doesn't spark joy. Marie Kondo preaches that once you overhaul your life, one category at a time, that is all you have to do. It's about changing your mindset. If you want to learn more about this lifestyle of choosing less, get in contact with your annoying friend. I guarantee that she will want to talk to you about it, maybe even help you get started! If you feel that you are ready to take the plunge, make sure that you read The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing,* so that you know exactly what you are in for. Follow Kondo's steps. You won't regret it, I promise! I recently bought myself a Royal Wedding commemorative mug, on a whim, just for the fact that it sparked joy for me. It makes me smile as I sip my tea. Life is really about the little things. Personally, I just like having fewer of them.

*Marie Kondo also has a new publication, Spark Joy, which is the same premise as The LifeChanging Magic of Tidying, but with more specific examples and some illustration.

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The Cotswolds Rock! A bit too much, actually. Where do we even begin?

Parental leave is an amazing window of opportunity, not only for getting to know your new baby and spending time together as a family, but also for meeting new friends and trying out activities together. The Cotswolds are spilling over with a multitude of wonderful family activities, but staying up to date with things going on can get a bit overwhelming. Especially when you've got your hands full. Wouldn't it be great if there were a searchable ultimate activity guide to make sure you find the things you want to find, and don't hear about amazing events in your area after they've happened? Actually this is why Cheltenham Rocks exists. Looking to entertain her two young boys, local mum of two Laura Brookes found that there wasn't anywhere simple to find everything going on locally for families, and since she's a whizz at creating websites, she decided to make her own online directory to help connect new parents with things to do locally. There is everything from baby and toddler groups, to family-friendly fĂŞtes, fairs and festivals, Santa's grottos, shows, and workshops. The filters mean you can search for events, attractions or activities by day (great for those 'what on earth shall we do today?' moments), age, distance, category, and cost. So if you're looking for a free event on Tuesday in Cheltenham for babies, this is how you can find it. Having started in Cheltenham, Laura has now created Cirencester Rocks and Gloucester Rocks, and with Stroud and the Five Valleys on the horizon for 2019, the Cotswolds are well covered, as you can see.


Laura says, 'It sounds cliché but the best part of running the sites is the hope that we're making family life a tiny bit easier, whether getting out of the house on a lonely morning with a new baby, breaking up a crazy day with a toddler, or getting the most out of a rare day off together. We're so lucky to have lots going on for families around the Cotswolds, keeping the sites full of activities isn't hard. The tough part has become choosing what to do myself.' Still wondering where to begin your new adventures? Here are some of Laura's top tips:

1.

Local libraries across the Cotswolds hold free Baby Bounce and Rhyme and Toddler Time sessions on weekdays.

2.

Primrose Vale PYO is a pushchair-friendly stroll whilst you pick seasonal fruit and veg. Perfect for all ages with a café, shop and play area.

3.

Café Q in Quedgeley is a great value spot with soft play for toddlers – with coffee and cake!

4. Cirencester has the most amazing collection of parks and play areas. 5.

The Brewery in Cheltenham has Play Farm (with baby sensory), Mr Mulligan's adventure golf, Cineworld, easy parking, and some fab shopping and dining.

6.

'Refresh' every month at Trinity Church, Cheltenham, has an activity, drinks, cake and a crèche for a collective time-out and recharge. Visit the website for more detail on all of these and more. It works like a charm on mobile devices as well as desktops. From the home page you can pick your chosen day or date range. View the results and use the filter button at the bottom to personalise the results to you. Choose from listing types, ages, cost, categories, venue and distance. Toggle one, a few, or all of these to get your personalised results.

www.cheltenhamrocks.co.uk ADVERTORIAL

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Nesting Instinct Interview and pictures by Cate Hamilton.

Like many pregnant mothers, I got hit by the nesting instinct at seven months and couldn't stop redecorating, cleaning and tidying my house ready for my baby's arrival. Elle Kemp, half of husband-and-wife interiors and renovation duo Ridge and Furrow, took her nesting to extremes when she and her husband Martin Gane bought an uninhabitable pig shed whilst Elle was pregnant with their first son, Claude. Elle, I've been a big fan of you guys on Instagram for a few years. How is it that you and Martin have come to live in such a gorgeous property nestled in the Cotswolds? Ever since we met, Martin and I have both had aspirations to build or at least take on major renovations. We were coming up with a few issues trying to buy land that can be built on because it is a) difficult to find, b) in high demand, and c) expensive. We had a very limited budget. We had reached a point where we had to make a drastic decision. My husband is a New Zealander and over there building your own house is quite a straightforward proposition. It is done regularly throughout the country, there's plenty of available land, the planning restrictions aren't too onerous, and the building industry is set up to serve self-builds. It seemed like if we were going to build our own house, we would have to move. Martin is an inveterate researcher. He will plug away hour after hour looking for just the right thing, whether it be reading every toaster review, spending hours on eBay to

find the right reclaimed sink, or searching fruitlessly day in day out on property websites (UK and NZ). I'd stopped looking at property locally as I'd given up hope and moved my horizons to the other side of the world, focusing on financial exchange fluctuations to see what we could muster to spend over there. Then one day it was just there, in the window of the nearest estate agent, just over the road. It was not love at first sight. Ours is not one of those barn conversions that you might typically imagine: no great theatrical open spaces of soaring scale, no grand cruck timber frames sweeping to the ceiling. Its delights would take longer to appreciate. What state was the property in when you bought it? The barn had had its roof recently redone (with the original terracotta pantiles) and the floors had been dug out down to the mud. The interior brick walls were damaged from many alterations that had been made over the years of farming. Lots of the stone walls had been eaten away by years of animal urine. 17


Gosh. How did you even begin to plan the renovation? Where did you start? There were plans in place already that had been drawn up to get planning permission. These plans compromised the original building and would have ended up with a building that felt like a new build. We knew we wanted to retain the character of the old building so we redesigned the plans over a course of months while we were adjusting to life with a newborn – lots of days in bed feeding a baby under a pile of design work. I used all my hours of feeding and holding a sleeping baby (he'd only sleep in my arms) to scroll through Pinterest collecting images which inspired but also helped to communicate to each other the ideas we were developing. Having lived together for years we already knew each other's tastes and luckily shared a love of traditional and reclaimed materials. As a husband-and-wife team, how do you organise yourselves on such a huge project? As I've been busy with two babies through the course of the build I haven't had the opportunity to be as hands-on as I'd like. I had aspirations to learn some of the trades

we'd require like tiling and plastering, but reality meant that my roles became lead designer, client, and babysitter. Martin had a bit of experience in building stuff but nothing like this – he'd done quite a bit of carpentry and worked as a garden designer and landscaper. The key skills he had were a can-do attitude, a keen eye for detail and precision, and the patience to research how to do stuff that he didn't already know. You were heavily pregnant or in the early days of new parenthood, and Martin was at the building site most days building your dream house. How did you keep yourself going through that first winter?


I was seven months pregnant when we bought the place in October 2012. The first winter I was caught up with developing the design. While we were waiting for planning permission changes to come through we sorted out the garden somewhat so that if I came to site there was somewhere that I could spend time with Claude. As the design work became less I began to be frustrated that there was little I could do. I embraced the garden being my domain for the time being and by the end of the first summer I had grown prize-winning giant onions and beans in our raised beds and felt that I was beginning to thrive in village life.

the same attitude to kids' stuff. Every now and then we ask the boys to pass on things they no longer play with to charity so that we don't get overrun, and they learn to think about others who are less fortunate. A lot of their toys are bought second hand – jigsaws and board games meld with our house quite well as they're mostly vintage too. And all the pieces of furniture around the house hold their fair share of the boys' stuff.

Looking at some of these pictures, it is hard to tell that you now have two very young boys at home. How do you balance the practical needs of a family with having such a stylish interior? Is it toddler-friendly?

I don’t know where we first came across box beds but Martin and I have always loved them. Unfortunately they're exceedingly impractical for double beds unless clambering is your thing. We knew the boys would always have to share their bedroom as the house only has two, so once we hit on the idea of box beds it seemed ideal as it would mean they would have their own private spaces. We could also make the most of the available space by building in storage underneath and around them.

As we designed we made sure we built in plenty of storage space. We'd seen from friends with kids how their stuff multiplies and can subsume a house and we were both keen not to lose our home to the deluge. When we moved in we had a huge cull of our own things and it was refreshing to be less encumbered by belongings so we've held

One of my favourite parts of your house is the beds that Martin has built for the boys. Where did you get that idea from? How do you find your inspiration?

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What is your favourite part of the house? Now that the kitchen's complete (two years after we moved in) it has to be our favourite space. It draws together so many of the things we love: the black gloss beadboard is inspired by one of our favourite pubs, the Woolpack in Slad, and the cabinets are made from mismatched pieces that we've altered and detailed to all work together. Then there's a limestone sink that adds the air of a scullery or outhouse to the place. Our style is kind of a mix of servants' quarters and old pubs – all unfussy diminutive rooms in vintage tones and utilitarian furnishings. You have such an eye for seeing potential in re-found objects. Which object has undergone the most radical transformation in your house? The limestone sink is the most worthy of note. It had been used as a garden trough so we had to sand the lichen off before we fitted it. We suspect it was once used for meat preparation as there appear to be cleaver marks in the base and it's charmingly worn down along the front edge from earlier use, a bit like the kind of bow that appears in old stone stairs over years of footfall.

The day after Martin finished the kitchen he hired in a digger to start over on our garden. Our children will spend their whole early childhood on a building site and they love it! I only worry that they'll be bereft when it's finally finished and there's no scaffolding to play on and no piles of rubble or sand to climb through! Martin's been so inspired by building his own workshop that he's begun building bespoke garden buildings for other people. We design them together, then he gets stuck into building them and sometimes landscaping them too, then I style them. We do outbuildings the same way we've done our home, working with natural and reclaimed materials to produce spaces that feel grounded, like they've always been there. It's been a pleasure spending time in your incredible house, Elle. If my shed were half as beautiful, I would spend the whole day in there! How can we contact you to discuss designing a bespoke project of our own? Follow @ridgeandfurrow on Instagram or visit ridgeandfurrow.co.uk for more inspiration and further details.

What are your top three tips for families looking to nest with their new babies? 1) Their things don't need to lead your style choices and they don't need half the stuff you're told they need anyway. Children don't need to be surrounded by primary colours to be stimulated: the world is all new to them, and everything is interesting. 2) Build in a good quantity of high shelves where precious things and dangerous things can be kept out of reach. 3) Try not to be precious about belongings – most of our vintage treasures are for daily use and my boys understand that things need to be treated with care, but that accidents do happen and it's only stuff after all. What's next for you now that your house is (almost) finished? Will it ever be finished? This is a living project and as such it'll continue evolving forever. However, the main construction of the house is complete now.

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My Stylish Friend Interview by Cate Hamilton. Pictures by Kate Ransome.

As two mums with six children between us and various undulations of body shapes and self-love/loathing phases over the last ten years, Kate and I were super excited to meet Sophie Jones-Cooper, Cotswolds mum of three under five (including two-year-old twins), and ex-international jetsetting stylist to Dubai royalty, fashion editor for HELLO! and style editor for Time Out. She sounds totally unapproachable already, right? Well, actually I had a recent style-chatwhilst-shopping experience with Sophie and, given that I feel mostly hopeless at knowing what I will look and feel good in when looking at clothes on the rail, it was a revelation. Sophie absolutely loves clothes, and she completely gets that motherhood comes with extra baggage and saggage, and that pregnancy is full of emotional bumps as well as physical ones. She puts you at ease and makes shopping fun again, but without making you think you are buying clothes because they are cool rather than because they will make you happy. So we decided to pick Sophie's brains a bit more about what to wear with a bump or post-baby body, to see if we can't get a sense of our old selves back now that we are busy working mums who are likely to be having a breakfast meeting with toddlers followed closely by a business meeting where we need to look and feel the part. Sophie, a lot of new mums (myself included) can feel a bit lost in their new bodies and

find it hard to dress in a way that feels like 'them'. Why is it so hard? As parents, it is second nature to put ourselves last. Let's face it, what is more important than keeping our little ones happy and healthy? But it is a 24/7 responsibility. With this lack of 'self-care', our confidence can easily plummet and it is so easy to lose 'you' and just become 'mummy'. For our sanity and theirs, we mamas need to take a little time out and think about us. When you had your three children, how on earth did you go from dressing for Paris/ Milan/London fashion week to tandem breastfeeding twins and not lose yourself in the process? As a full-time mum for the last six years, I certainly know the A-Z of pregnancy, breastfeeding issues, and motherhood in general, including all the physical changes, mental shifts and confidence issues we mamas go through on our parenting journey. I spent too many years waiting for my body to go back to what it was and waiting to buy 23


clothes that I really love, because I didn't feel I'd get enough wear from them. But then I realised, pregnancy is a year of our life (that's four seasons!), and the first few years of parenting are a huge part of our life when we should feel good about ourselves. So I decided to live in the now and embrace my mummy body. Since deciding to wear clothes that work for me now, I feel like me again. That sounds like a great way to live in theory, but our bodies are so different. I went from 9 stone and size 10, to 12 stone and size 14 when I had my first two babies 18 months apart, and I was so miserable about it! I didn't even know which shops to go in anymore. So my question is, where does a pregnant lady even start? For longevity, look for 'non-maternity' clothes that would be suitable for maternity wear such as tent and A-line dresses, button-down shirts and dresses, and elasticated-waist skirts and trousers, which will last bump to beyond. Many high street stores now stock their regular lines in maternity; so if style is priority, try Topshop, H&M and ASOS. Jumpsuits are great for versatility and longevity, both during pregnancy and post-bump.

And I didn't tandem breastfeed (high five, by the way for that!) but I did feed for about three years in a row. What can we wear that's practical and also keeps us feeling like 'us' during this phase, however long it may be? Well, printed and colourful scarves add an instant style boost and double up as a great cover-up for feeding. You could also invest in a breastfeeding vest to wear under regular tops and dresses, so they are covering up your tummy but give easy access for feeding. And also look for button-down tops and dresses in your regular shops – they will last beyond your breastfeeding days. And about that tummy. I'm super proud that it grew three babies, but I struggle to dress because of it. Got any amazing solutions? Paper-bag, pleated-front and peplum waists are great for highlighting your waist, but fall flatteringly over the mum-tum. They will make the most of your waist to draw the eye upwards. Also you can choose camis, blouses, shirts and tees instead of skinny vests and tops as they work well, even tucked in, since they don’t grip around the tum. Go highwaisted with jeans or try a boyfriend cut.


Amazing, thank you Sophie. I still feel a bit nervous about going shopping for me even after eight years of motherhood. What can mothers do if they want to pick your brains or get personal style advice? Personal styling isn't just for the rich and famous. Every woman deserves to feel good in her clothes and particularly new mums and mums-to-be who are dealing with so many body changes and emotional ups and downs. It's all about wearing what makes you feel good. Since I've been through the breastfeeding woes and wondered what to wear to the local toddler group, and have the day-to-day struggles of all us mums, but also have a background in fashion that is very much part of me, I've decided to combine my motherhood and styling experience to offer women in the Cotswolds (and beyond) the opportunity to find confidence and happiness in their body, lifestyle and clothes. That sounds ace. How does it work? Well, it's a bit like inviting your friend round to talk about clothes! I will come to your home and de-clutter your wardrobe or help you get the most from it, get you out of that 'skinny jeans and tee' rut and help you understand

your new body and how best to dress it. I'll take you out shopping or bring clothes suited for you, to you. I also run styling parties, where you get a group of friends together at your home for a fun evening of styling advice and inspiration. Oh, I like that idea a lot. It doesn't sound too intimidating at all. More like hanging out with a clued-up mate. Exactly. That's why I've called my new venture My Stylish Friend. I'm really passionate about helping fellow women re-find their style mojo and understand how to dress for their body, lifestyle and confidence once they become mothers too. Thanks, Sophie! I'm feeling excited about shopping again already! For more style tips follow My Stylish Friend on Instagram @my_stylishfriend and for more information visit Sophie's website mystylishfriend.net or email mystylishfriend@gmail.com.

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Post-Natal Exercise Words by Nicki Ryder (@cheltenham_fit_mama). Illustrations by Anna Stead.

Strong glutes support your pelvis and therefore your pelvic floor and core, including your back. Make glute health a priority! Here are my top five workouts that you can do from the comfort of your living room. You can make these even more effective by using resistance bands. Aim for 15 to 20 of each, and repeat the sequence three times. Hip thrusters

Split squats

• • • •

Slide off your sofa and keep the edge of the sofa at your bra line Cross your arms across your chest Legs bent at 90 degrees, feet just wider than hip distance apart, toes facing forward Inhale as you lower your chest and hips down to the floor (let your eyeline follow) Exhale as you squeeze your glutes and drive your hips up to the ceiling

• • • •

Stand about one stride away from the sofa Raise one leg behind you and place the flat of your foot on the sofa Ensure that when you squat down, your leg bends at 90 degrees and your knee doesn't go over your toe Inhale as you squat down Exhale as you drive through your heel to standing


Reverse lunges • •

Stand up straight Inhale as you take one big step behind you, landing on your toes, enabling you to drop down straight into a lunge

• •

Exhale as you drive back up to standing through your front heel Alternate

Box Squats

Reverse hip thrusters

• •

• •

• •

Sit on the sofa Legs bent at 90 degrees, feet firmly on the ground Breathe out as you squeeze your glutes and drive through your heels to standing Inhale as you lower back down to seated

• •

Lie on floor, with bottom up close to sofa Place feet on edge of sofa, hip distance apart Exhale as you squeeze your glutes and drive your hips up to the ceiling as high as you can Inhale as you lower all the way back down to the floor

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Self-Care Isn't Selfish Words and picture by Danni Blackburn.

Without a doubt, becoming a parent changes your life in a way no-one can ever imagine. That newborn smell; the first baby giggles; the first words – it's all magical! What is much less magical is the awful feeling of guilt that so many of us feel when doing something 'just for you', no kids allowed. But self-care really is so important for all parents. After all, you can't pour from an empty cup! So why not try and find something 'just for you' this winter? It could be something as simple as cosying up with a book and a glass of wine, or even binge-watching that boxset you've been meaning to. Or, as I have done, why not take the opportunity to set yourself a challenge or develop a new skill? I checked out an evening course at a local college and finally learned how to use my camera after years of owning it. What's great is that now I can use my new-found skills to photograph my girls and I met a lot of new friends along the way. If it's exercise that you used to love doing pre-children, but you just can't find the time, set yourself a challenge of an organised run. That way you have to get out and make the time to practise. I even committed to a charity skydive this year, all in the name of doing something for me! Self-care isn't selfish so why not say yes to that offer of a babysitter? You could spend some well-deserved time on yourself or have some child-free time with your partner. The kids will be fine and if they're anything like mine, they'll enjoy the time with other adults, be it grandparents, aunties, uncles, or friends. It's likely to be a long, cold winter so make sure you take care of your needs too. Chances are you'll feel like a better parent for it.

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open the window.

inhale. new growth, this is the season of

our opportunity to

nurture, tend & nourish.

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Self Renovation Interview by Kate Starkey and Cate Hamilton. Pictures by Jenny Stewart.

The Window Magazine is excited to be travelling the Cotswolds in search of inspiring stories of parents who have overcome adversity to create magic in our area. In our inaugural edition we're delighted to interview Natasha Willmore, Gretton-based mum of one, business owner at design agency Culpepper and Co., and half of the brains and talent behind the upcoming Recipes to Remember charity cookbook, created in aid of Maggie's, the cancer charity. Natasha, tell us about the day you left the world of traditional employment. I'd been working as a creative graphic designer for an agency for twelve years. I was running a team, producing 500 design items each month, working to deadlines, and it was here that I met my husband Mark. Mark told me, 'Tash, you’re great at what you do but you're working too many hours – you could do this for yourself.' Eventually he supported me to take the plunge to leave and restart as a self-employed designer. My team took the news so well. This was in 2005. On the day I left work I'd known Mark for a year and we'd been married for just thirteen weeks. That evening – just before Christmas, about 6pm on a filthy rainy night – I walked out of work to go for evening drinks with my friends. A group of four of us were crossing

the Bath Road where traffic was stacked due to late-night Christmas shopping and rush hour. A car to my right pulled out of stationary traffic, looked behind him but not in front, and put his foot down. I was the first one in the line of my four friends and the only one that he hit. All four of us were crossing – all four of us were not wrong to cross at that time. So life changed in an instant. How serious was the accident? My injuries were pretty catastrophic. I was in hospital for a few months and I had to come to terms with the fact that I would need to learn to walk again. Fortunately, Mark had been in the middle of renovating our first home together and was able to make a few adaptations so that my bed could be set up downstairs.

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And financially? The timing of this presumably couldn't have been worse for you both? Mark was also self-employed doing building work and obviously I'd just waved goodbye to employment and hadn't even begun the process of setting up my business. So initially we lived off credit cards while Mark visited me in hospital and eventually brought me home (still ferrying between endless hospital appointments) and got me better again. We couldn't go on much longer without me earning a living, so from my bed I got my laptop and phone out and started contacting all of the potential clients who had said, 'I really want to work with you, Tash, and when you are ready give me a ring.' But of course I had to explain to them that though I was ready to work I couldn't get to them and they had to come to me and be happy to work alongside my bed. The answer unanimously seemed to be yes – even from some clients who I had never met before! Having worked in an agency for such a long time, I had an amazing network of wonderful freelancers who were happy for me to call on them for help and I'd say to new clients, 'I'm not very well. I can't walk. But I do

have a great colleague who can visit you and get this moving.' And what about the psychological effects of the accident? It must have affected your emotional wellbeing? I had to have cognitive behavioural therapy for some time to help me recover from the shock and the post-traumatic stress. One of my biggest problems was that I couldn't process information as well as before. I knew what I wanted to happen but I couldn't join the dots in how to get there. I couldn't read a book for months and months after the accident. Not being able to walk leaves you so vulnerable. I'd cry when being pushed in my wheelchair as I hated not being in control. But the flip side is that the accident empowered me. I couldn't let my family and my future life with Mark and everything that I had ahead of me fall away. I just couldn't. So off I went! In time I'd go with colleagues to clients – taking the chair and the sticks. I'd take the brief on the job and be enthusiastic and people would forget that I couldn’t walk. Then back at home I'd share the work out amongst my network of freelancer friends. It was an amazing collaborative experience and that's how I built Culpepper and Company.


It was initially always going to be just me – just Natasha Culpepper, freelance designer – but this unexpected life event meant that actually it was about a team of people who supported me through this incredibly difficult period. James, my wonderful illustrator; a fantastic friend, Norman, who is a designer; photographers like Phil from Shadowplay and so many more. They've all supported me from the very beginning and things have just grown and grown and grown from there. How long did it take for you to start living remnants of your old life? My accident happened just before Christmas. For Christmas Mark bought me a trip to Madrid the following Easter. Of course I told him there was no way I'd be able to go but he'd bought the trip as an incentive and there was no way he was going to accept my excuses. 'At Easter you’ll be getting on a plane and going to Madrid,' he'd say – so matterof-factly! Of course the wheelchair and the sticks came along too but we haven't let the accident stop us from living a full life. When life-changing incidents happen you realise how precious life is, and alongside the business there was no hanging about. We were going to have a family as quickly as we could as life is just too short not to have made that decision. So I was still using my wheelchair when I became pregnant with our daughter Maisie (now twelve).

to have the opportunity to juggle life this way and I have never hidden the fact that I'm a mum from a client and neither has my husband. We are parents first – we worked really hard for that and it's beautiful. We get the impression that the beauty of living is something you don't take for granted and is something you've injected into your business. Would you agree? In order to deliver creative work you have to know your client's business as well as they do. You have to live it, put on your muddy boots and get stuck in and get to know them, understand their brief and give them that little bit extra that will surprise and delight. It's not just about logos and websites, it's about finding out the essence of what they want and delivering that extra level of loveliness to inspire that person to push on with their business or project. Cacklebean Eggs (a client) are the perfect example of this – a couple with a young child who were committed to farming and producing the very best eggs. Helping them with their packaging was about designing something stunning that would take their wonderful product to the next level and inspire them to pitch it to some amazing retailers. That project was brief gold!

And did your health have an impact on the pregnancy? I was very ill during my pregnancy and again was stuck in bed for a lot of the time. Once again the team stepped up to keep the business wheels turning. We became a collective of creatives who could all work flexibly and who all respect one another's needs as working mums, dads, and actually just as people who want to live as well as work. We've always worked around hours that we want to. If I want to work 7pm until 2am tonight so I can play in the garden all day tomorrow, that's okay and the same applies to the team. As long as the work is delivered on time, on budget, it's beautiful, and surprises and delights our clients, then does it matter when it's done? I feel very privileged

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And now? Do you still see your accident as a terrible part of your life or do you think it has shaped the way that you live?

And of course this was just the start of a beautiful working relationship between you and Kelly?

My accident has taught me that there is no space for negativity in my life. It drags you down into a place that is dark and has no use. The driver of the car was found to be uninsured and I did receive a small amount of compensation eventually. We spent it by taking a few months to travel with Maisie, who was then three. We visited Thailand, Australia and New Zealand, and again the team stepped in to keep the business operating. We did it just because that time and those memories were priceless. I created a journal of the trip with a map and all of the photos of all the things we did – the first place she swam in the ocean, where she first put her shoes on all by herself!

It was. The next exciting project for Kelly and me is the Maggie's Recipes to Remember cookbook. I coerced Kelly into coming with me to an event at Maggie's in Cheltenham and of course as soon as she walked through the door she loved everything about it. Maggie's is a cancer support charity open to absolutely everybody who has been touched by cancer (so friends and family as well as people who are going through it), offering around-the-kitchen-table support across all aspects of living. It's all about not being in a clinical hospital environment and being supported and cared for in a beautifully designed space.

And the impact it had on the way that you developed your business and turned it into a collective – what a wonderful way to channel your positivity! I'm with people for the journey. The people I meet are my friends and so many amazing projects have come about as a result of collaborations. Can you give us an example? Through Phil from Shadowplay I met his wonderful wife Kelly and we've been friends since our children were small. I'd been madly admiring her interior design from the sidelines and slowly we started working together bringing branding and interior design on creative collaborations that really take that brand to the next level. The Find (Cheltenham's much-loved coffee house and restaurant) is the biggest example of how we've worked together. David who owns The Find began this project with great passion and a great vision and it was our job to help him name it and create the whole experience of a customer visiting. It's been fantastic to work with him and we continue to do so.


What inspired the book?

And how can readers buy the book?

The book is inspired by my stepfather's recent cancer journey and is a collection of more than sixty memory-inducing recipes, some from national celebrities and some from local people of interest who are supporters of Maggie's. The book was launched at Cheltenham Literature Festival 2018 and every penny of profit will go to the charity. We're determined to raise a minimum of £10,000 through the project. Gabby Logan, Jeremy Vine, Raymond Blanc, Tom Kerridge, Dr Sarah Jarvis – there have been some amazing contributors. We're eating lots of food while we do all the photography! Soups, cakes – so many delicious dishes!

The book is available to order online, and stocked locally in lots of amazing retailers. It's an incredible project and you must be so proud of the finished product. A great cause that we're sure many of our readers will want to support. Thanks for sharing your story, Tash, and may your business and family continue to thrive. maggiescookbook.com culpepperandcompany.co.uk

It's been a huge undertaking! Sixty recipes to cook and photograph, and a whole book to put together around our day jobs. It's been a magical experience. It's going to be stunning and the stories are absolutely charming.

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Pioneering Parents

Even before the first child is born, fathers are having to reinvent themselves and find new paths. And pioneers need to dress the part, right? Having said that, it is not always easy to find interesting men's clothing in the Cotswolds. We were therefore excited to discover a range of clothes designed right here in Cheltenham that really made us stop and look. &SONS is a range of unique workwear clothing designed by, and for, craftspeople, artisan makers, and creative pioneers in their chosen fields of endeavour. And for everyone else, it looks great if you're just hanging out at the park on Saturday with a couple of kids and a caramel latte. The clothing is the brainchild of a group of like-minded craftspeople who make their living from taking and shaping superb visual imagery. That close attention to detail and style has now been applied to clothing for pioneers. The world needs pioneers: people willing to try something new, break new ground, set out on new paths. Just like parents do. Having been designed by visual artists, there is immense attention to detail in the clothes, which reflect traditional values and are made with timehonoured skills, using only the finest natural materials. These guys really know how to put a garment together from design to tailoring, with care in every stitch and love in every seam. This is clothing for creative pioneers: individuals who stretch themselves, their boundaries and their horizons. These are clothes for people who are cut from a different cloth. For it is only when we strive to be better that we achieve our goals and live in fulfilment of our dreams. And these are the values that we pass on to our children. And also, they are damn cool. Clothes designed by local dad Phil James, founder and creative director of &SONS. Designed in Cheltenham, shipped worldwide from andsons.co.uk.


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Find Your Village Words by Kate Starkey. Illustration by Cate Hamilton.

The moment you know you are to become a parent, before you decorate the nursery, before you consider what method of feeding or sleeping will suit your family, before you start discussing names, and certainly before that child arrives and you realise you're not entirely sure what happens next – FIND YOUR VILLAGE! Both parents need friends that get it. Friends on the end of a WhatsApp and friends at the end of your road. Parenthood is the time to find your brave. Be the girl that smiles at the fellow bump owner in the shop. Be the guy that crosses the pub and offers to buy the other guy a drink. Be the one that says, 'Oh, we should plan a night out.' And even if you're months, or years down the road of parenthood, if you're feeling alone, find your brave and find your village. In this digital era, the long and winding road of parenthood need not be trodden alone. There has never been a more important time to say 'yes, please' when someone offers to help and to find like-minded, non-judgemental kinfolk to use as a sounding board and comfort when times are tough. Reach out.


Jeans Therapy Life changes when you become a mother. Priorities, time and sometimes your body shape are different after having children. There is one staple section of your wardrobe that will see you through the longest days and withstand the toughest tests of life in the Parent Hood: jeans. Bodega's range of jeans come in styles that take you from play date to date night effortlessly. Try the Alex jean in a range of colours for a style that flatters every single shape, or the super stretch high-waisted range for a safe bet for life as a busy mum and the fashion-forward, independent woman that you've always been. Bodega is a welcoming independent fashion boutique on Cheltenham's Suffolk Parade where you and your family are always welcome. You can also shop online. The code WINDOW10 will give you 10% off your first order at shopbodega.co.uk. Find Bodega (and your new jeans) on Suffolk Parade, Cheltenham, Gloucestershire, GL50 2AE.

ADVERTORIAL

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Nourish Your Child Words by Kate Dimmer. Pictures by Cate Hamilton and Kate Ransome.

Feeding our children is not easy sometimes, is it? Children's breakfasts can often be high in sugar and low in nutrients. To avoid this, aim for whole, unprocessed foods and try including fruit or vegetables in every meal. Here are two nutritious breakfast recipes that will provide a nourishing start to your child's day. Apple and Cinnamon Overnight Oats 1 eating apple, coarsely grated 60g jumbo porridge oats Ÿ teaspoon ground cinnamon, plus extra for sprinkling ½ teaspoon vanilla extract 150ml of whole milk 1 banana* 2 dessert spoons of natural, whole-fat Greek yoghurt *Top with whatever fruit is in season such as pear, stewed rhubarb or orange segments. In a bowl, put the oats, grated apple, vanilla and cinnamon. Mix well then stir in the milk. Cover and chill in the fridge for several hours or overnight. The next morning, spoon the muesli into bowls, top with a spoonful of yoghurt, slices of banana and a sprinkle of cinnamon. Blitz with a hand-blender for little ones. Serves two toddlers or one hungry older child.


Mini Vegetable Frittatas Butter for greasing 4 large free-range eggs 50ml whole milk Large handful grated cheddar cheese 2 medium carrots* (or 1 large), peeled and grated 1 tablespoon chopped spring onions* Large handful of frozen peas* (thawed) *Use seasonal veg and herbs such as cherry tomatoes, courgette and basil in summer. Pre-heat the oven to 180°C (fan)/200°C. Grease a six-hole muffin tin. Beat the eggs then add the milk and whisk again. Add the veg you are using and half the cheese. Spoon or pour the mixture into the muffin tin and top with the rest of the grated cheese. Bake for approximately twenty minutes or until golden and firm and a cocktail stick inserted in the middle comes out clean. Enjoy hot or cold or gently reheat in the oven the next day. Makes six mini frittatas.

Kate Dimmer is a Cheltenham-based registered nutritional therapist and registered nutritionist who is passionate about using nutrition and lifestyle to support optimal health and wellbeing. katedimmer.com

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Grow Your Mind Words by Katerina Draper. Illustrations by Anna Stead.

One of the things new parents are often quite anxious to 'get right' is their child's physical and mental development. There are endless sources of information telling you what you should and should not be doing, and there are so many products out there supposedly made to 'help' development. Here is my 'top six' list of child development tips. 1. Attachment

2. Growth facilitation

The relationships built in early life are the building blocks and foundations, not only for our own future relationships, but also for confidence, independence, and emotional regulation to name but a few. The mother-infant interaction (I use the mother as the norm primary caregiver, but this is not exclusive) is of enormous importance to our children. What we want to see is positive, predictable, and sensitive interaction between the primary caregiver(s) and the infant. With a healthy foundation of interactions, emotional and physical development will be improved.

A good interaction base will ensure the caregiver is 'in tune' with the child, and will be able to follow their lead in terms of development. Children are incredibly good at knowing what they want to know next. Our job is not to give them that knowledge but to facilitate them discovering it themselves. You may notice your toddler is starting to be interested in stacking things, so you get out the building blocks. They will more than likely get it 'wrong', putting a large block above a small and so on. It is important to let them do that. Let them find out for themselves, with your guidance, what works and what doesn't. You, a teacher, or even a peer can act as a source of knowledge and development for children.


3. Independence

4. Get outside

Let them explore! The one thing that stands out in Western children is the potential effects of helicopter parenting. It is okay for them to get a scratch, or bump, or get their feelings hurt. Your job is to teach them how to cope with this, not to prevent it. Resilience is an important skill, which many of the current generation do not seem to have as much of. The reasons behind this seem complex and unclear, but fostering independence will help.

Whether your baby is a few weeks old or fifteen years old, being in nature, and being outdoors, is so important for our development. Aside from the obvious fresh air and vitamin D benefits, being outside lets children explore the real world, create their own games, and has been shown to have benefits for the physical and mental health of both child and mother!

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5. Let them get bored

6. Conversations

Without boredom, creativity will never happen. The benefits of creative play are also huge, so let it happen and enjoy taking their lead. Avoid giving them loads of toys or 'things'. They will have more fun with a cardboard box than they will anything else, so get a box out, some paint, tape and crafty items, get yourself a cup of tea, and watch what they create!

Even from the very early days, all the way through to the babbles, to first words, and beyond, conversations are vital. When your baby babbles respond as if they are talking to you, tell them how your day was, or how you are feeling, and ask them questions. These early interactions are really important in language development and social interaction. Katerina is relatively new to the Gloucestershire area, having grown up in Greece, and then coming to the UK to go to the University of Birmingham. While at university she completed her degree and PhD in Psychology, specifically looking at language development. Later interest and research has made her an expert in developmental disorders, attachment and all things child development! One such interest includes becoming a mum in late 2016, at which time she set up Morphosis Education. Her hope is to help parents understand child development and work with them to address any concerns they may be having. She also lectures at the University of Gloucestershire, conducting research into rhythm-based interventions for language development, body image, and pre- and post-natal mental health. Find Morphosis Education at morphosiseducation.com


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'Gardening – it's rock n roll and good for the soul.' Jo Whiley

'to plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow.' audrey hepburn


Get Botanical Words by Louise Gill. Illustrations by Cate Hamilton.

We are in the midst of a huge trend for all things botanical and plant-related. More and more of us want to bring the outside in and the inside out, blurring the lines between house and garden. Something tells me that this trend is here to stay, with the emphasis on wellbeing and creating beautiful spaces to enjoy both in the home, and outside it. With the digital world being so fast-paced and instant, the world of plants and nature is becoming ever more appealing. Just ten minutes in the garden, tidying up, weeding or simply pottering around can make you feel better. Get the children involved. Better still, give them an area of the garden that's theirs. Take them to the garden centre to choose bulbs or seeds and let them have a go at growing things. Gardening at home is about trial and error and creating a space that's personal to you and your family. Don't be afraid to experiment and unleash your creative side in the garden. The principals of good planting design incorporate colour, shape and texture, so remember this when you're planning your new pot or garden border. In the last few years we've also seen houseplants making a huge comeback, with plants featuring everywhere from children's bedrooms through to global businesses.

There are also huge health and wellbeing benefits to having plants in your home. The Royal Horticultural Society says, 'As well as looking good, houseplants are known to support human health in homes, offices, schools, and hospitals. They improve air quality by trapping and capturing pollutants, helping us to breathe more easily. Likewise, they provide a wide range of mental and physical health benefits.' My two daughters now have plants in their bedrooms and really enjoy looking after their plant offspring. They're getting pretty good with plant names too. I see future FOLIA employees in the making! Louise owns recently-opened Cheltenham plant store FOLIA PLANTING, in Montpellier, and you can find her there or on Instagram @folia.planting.uk to pick her brains about plant sourcing and planting design for homes, businesses and gardens. foliaplanting.co.uk

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CafĂŠs for Crawlers Words by Roseann Thompson, food blogger at honeybourneline.co.uk Pictures by Kate Starkey.

A few months back, when my daughter, PJ, was still entertained by me simply meeting up with various friends, nattering away and eating cake whilst bouncing her on my lap, I really hadn't realised how easily entertained and transportable a new baby was. So please, heed my advice, and enjoy, because that (blissful) phase will soon come to an end. For me, it wasn't a smooth transition. Despite PJ whining every time we went somewhere and me crying into my coffee cup, I kept arranging to meet up with friends and I kept insisting we go to lovely places, and I kept paying out for spoilt drinks, cakes and lunches. No one was happy: not her, not me, not the other customers, and most definitely not the friend we'd met up with. The problem? PJ needed space, she wanted to start moving, not be confined to a pushchair, a highchair, or my arms. She wanted excitement in the form of toys and interesting things going on. So, it got me thinking, I can't be the only one who still wants to meet up with friends and go to places with PJ where we can all be happy, can I?! And when I say all be happy, that means me as well as PJ. She's got her needs, but I've got mine too. I still want delicious cakes, a good choice of drinks, healthy and not-so-healthy lunches to choose from, and staff that offer great service as well as an understanding of what it's like to be a worn-out parent and not have enough hands to push a pram as well as carry a cup of tea. Well, whether I was the only one or not, I set about finding places that ticked all the boxes and it's only fair to share, no?


Café Boho Great Norwood Street, Cheltenham

Gloucester Services M5 Southbound

From the outside you'd be excused for thinking this is NOT the place for children, but head downstairs and you've got an Aladdin's cave of child-friendliness. I visited here a few years back with a friend and her niece, but since then, they've done the downstairs room up and it is now just as lovely as the rest of the café. Woohoo, it is nice not to feel like you’ve been relegated to…the kids' room! With giant, comfy sofas and a couple of normal tables and chairs too, there's still plenty of floor space for little ones to move around and a fab selection of toys to play with.

The southbound service station has an amazing area made just for children (and their chauffeurs), complete with indoor adventure play; nearby tables and chairs for the adults; a sink, kettle and microwave for those pesky bottles, food pouches and washing sticky hands; and there's lots of outdoor space to explore too. They've got family toilets (big thumbs up) and a food offering that'll please both adults and children. Whether it's a whole plate of grub you're after, something smaller, or just a cake and coffee, you're onto a winner here.

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School House Café St Paul's Road, Cheltenham

The Wilson Café Clarence Street, Cheltenham

Try not to get too disheartened as you walk through the lovely adult part of the café with twinkly fairy lights, people reading books, remote workers tapping away on their laptops and friends sharing grown-up conversation over a peaceful cup of coffee. You see, with a baby, it's the lounge area you'll 'want' to go to. It's, erm, not as peaceful as the other bit, but hey, it's not all about you anymore! They've got lots of space in there, a play area, a couple of boxes of toys, big comfy sofas and highchairs. The menu is pretty extensive and very reasonably priced.

So again, with this one, you need to walk through the adult bit of the café, take the lift to the first floor and there you’ll find space galore, great baby-changing facilities, a play area with soft mats, a little table and chairs for toddlers and two humongous comfy sofas for the adults – along with plenty of other seating. They have a great menu offering the usual breakfast and lunch stuff, a really strong cake game, and a children's menu.


King's Coffee House Church Street, Charlton Kings

Star Bistro Ullenwood

It's not often I gallivant over to the posh side of town, so this was a new spot for me, but I can see King's Coffee House becoming a regular haunt now. If you don't live nearby, there's free parking just a couple of minutes away in Church Piece. Split over two levels with a beautiful outdoor courtyard, this coffee shop oozes elegance – even when you have a kid in tow. It's got a modern art-deco feel to it, with plenty of books and toys, spacious baby-changing facilities and a mixture of seating. They serve up wonderful cakes as well as your usual lunch suspects like jacket potatoes, soup, salads and toasties, and they have a children's menu ranging from £2.50 to £3.95. One final thing: they do Oreo cookie milkshakes. Sold?!

So far, my recommendations have all been coffee-shop-style places, but what if you want some fancy food? Our tastebuds don't disappear when we become parents, so it's only right I include somewhere you can go for some proper wining and dining. Crawlers can roam free, there's a play corner with lots of toys and books, and there's no pressure to keep the noise down. As well as mighty fine food for grown-ups, their children's menu is spot on too, offering everything from jam sandwiches to poached eggs, burgers, fishcakes and the best lemon tart you ever did try. You'll be pleased to hear it also features on the adult menu!

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Let the

light in. Explore,

discover & embrace a joyful

way of living under blue skies & the dappled shade of an oak tree.

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Trust Me Words and picture by Kate Starkey.

Sometimes it's easiest to kid yourself that staying at home is a cheaper/safer/simpler/more relaxing way to spend time together as a family. And of course, at times, that's absolutely true. But when the stars collide to offer a day with the magic ingredients of daylight, free time, and just a touch of energy to propel yourself out of that front door, this is how we suggest you spend it. The National Trust is a conservation organisation in England, Wales and Northern Ireland, and the largest membership organisation in the United Kingdom. Before you write this article off as something that isn't for cool people just like you – think again. All these people with memberships know something that you don't! £114 (ish) will buy you a year's family membership and for that you have access to a dozen local country estates and stately homes where your children can roam free and soak up some vitamin D, while you enjoy some first-class tea and cake or, if you're smashing life, a delicious picnic. The days are long but the years are short. Enjoy your long days in the great outdoors and all the noise and pressures of parenthood will be temporarily dampened.

Locally you can enjoy Newark Park, Chedworth Roman Villa, Hidcote Gardens, Snowshill Manor, Dyrham Park and Coughton Court – a little further afield but absolutely worth it – and my personal favourite, Croome (pictured). That up-front membership fee has the potential to buy you days and days of tree climbing, games of pooh sticks, endless hide-and-seek opportunities, and more than enough stunning photo backdrops to fill your albums or your Instagram feed for a lifetime. Everything is easier in the great outdoors. Get your membership and step outside. You can thank me later.

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Wine O'Clock Gastronomic tour of the Cotswolds by Ant Davies and ZoĂŤ Fisher.

After a day spent exploring the world with our little ones, rustling up nutritious meals that they may or may not eat, and keeping on top of life admin (everything else!), we often feel like we've earned a little glass of something. No one knows wine and likes a nice meal as much as Ant and Zo from The Grape Escape, so we asked them for some recommendations where to go eating and drinking, both with and without the little darlings in tow. The Grape Escape was quick to become a favourite spot for a glass of wine in Cheltenham when it opened in 2015. It is owned by Ant and Zo, who were influenced and motivated by the exciting wine bar scene that was developing in London at the time. They watched as the wine scene exploded around them and spent many an evening, over many a bottle of wine, discussing how much they would love to open a wine bar in the Cotswolds. After an inspirational trip to California, the couple decided it was time to put their dream into action; they left their jobs, sold their house and moved to Cheltenham. The wine list includes around 300 options from over twenty different countries. Memories of their trip to the USA are obvious

given the size of their Californian selection, which they believe to be the most exciting wine region in the world right now. The by-the-glass list changes every week so customers always have something new to try and the 'flight' option has become increasingly popular, especially for customers wishing to test their knowledge by attempting to guess which wine is which. Their aim was to create a comfortable and relaxed atmosphere where fun and friendliness make sure there is no intimidation when it comes to choosing wine. Ant and Zo love to encourage customers to try something new and are always happy for you to try before you buy. More than anything, they want people to enjoy a glass of wine at The Grape Escape as much as they enjoy sourcing it. 59


Leisurely brunch

Let off some steam

Baker & Graze 48 Suffolk Rd, Cheltenham GL50 2AQ

Russell's Fish & Chips 20a High St, Broadway WR12 7DT

When it comes to brunch there is nowhere to match Baker & Graze in the Suffolks area of Cheltenham for creativity and pure deliciousness. The brunch menu includes delights such as lamb merguez sausages with scrambled eggs on toast or shakshuka baked eggs and is served from 8am until 4pm (perfect for late risers like us!).

Our favourite place for a day-off lunch is even better if you take the steam train from Cheltenham racecourse and make a real day of it!

Look a little further and you'll reach the daily-changing lunch menu that may include confit duck and waffles or amazing porchetta with endive and radicchio salad. The wine list is small and perfectly formed; the cava is a must. Oh and we haven't even mentioned the doughnuts or masterful breads available to take away!

Russell's chippy is just off the High Street in beautiful Broadway and is the perfect spot for a bit of casual al fresco dining. Only the finest fish is served, and you can choose from grilled or fried options. The chips are cooked in award-winning Cotswold Gold rape seed oil, which is grown and refined only two miles away. We always struggle to decide between the four fantastic white wines on offer; we went with the classically steely Chablis last time.


Back to the source

Date night

Three Choirs Vineyard Newent GL18 1LS

Lumière Clarence Parade, Cheltenham GL50 3PA

Situated deep in the sleepy Gloucestershire countryside, the Three Choirs Vineyard offers a magical overnight escape. Arrive mid-morning for a stroll to the edge of the carefully tended vineyards and get up close to some of the twelve grape varieties grown on the 75-acre estate.

When you finally get an evening to yourself you deserve all the spoils and we can think of nowhere better to deliver than awardwinning Lumière. The setting, the service, the food and the wines (a few of which we supply ourselves) are all sensational.

Take a guided tour of the winery and taste four of the wines produced before a lovely lunch in the brasserie. In the afternoon, check into one of the comfortable vineyardview bedrooms or lodges; we’d suggest that this is the perfect time to share a bottle of the vineyard's Classic Cuvée or rosé on your veranda. Sleep as peacefully as the vines and wake refreshed and ready for breakfast.

Helen and her front-of-house team make you feel like royalty, then Jon leaves you speechless with exciting, modern and inventive dishes. For the full experience go with the tasting menu with matching wines – this is one you'll be telling the kids about when they're old enough!

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Courtside Cool Styled in the Cotswolds. Pictures by Kate Ransome.

The 'coolest' thing a person can possibly be is unashamedly and unreservedly themselves. When it comes to helping our children believe this, fashion is a great place to start, and the Cotswolds are full of exciting clothing brands at the top of their game.

Arwen (left) wears gold dress from FG4 Boutique Broadway fg4london.com, and mouse ears from The Lion Sparkles, thelionsparkles.com. Alex wears frill collar blouse and soft wool footless leggings, both from Belle Enfant Boutique, belleenfant-boutique.com.

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This page: Sylvie and John wear handmade separates all from Daphne and Margot, daphneandmargot.com. Opposite: Sylvie (top left) wears Ditsy Floral tee-shirt and leggings from Cotswold Baby Co, cotswoldbabyco.co.uk and beanie from The Lion Sparkles. Lila (top right) wears flutter sleeve Peter Rabbit Dress from Daphne and Margot. George (bottom) wears Bertie Fox polo shirt and dino leggings, both from Cotswold Baby Co.


65


Above: George (left) wears handmade dinosaur t-shirt from Daphne and Margot. Dylan (right) wears snowboarder sweatshirt and black jeans, both from FG4 Boutique Broadway. Below: Lila wears frill collar blouse from Belle Enfant Boutique and handmade organic cotton jersey jumpsuit from Lovesay and Mo, lovesayandmo.co.uk. John wears funnel sweater from Belle Enfant Boutique and handmade organic cotton jersey jumpsuit from Lovesay and Mo.


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Summer Nights Words by Matt Hall. Illustrations by Anna Stead.

It is no longer all that common for the modern dad to have an abundance of free time in the evenings. 'Does feeding them tea, tidying, doing bath and bed routines, and then collapsing with a glass of red wine count?' This was the common response from many of the dads who were asked to contribute to this feature. However, the longer light evenings that the advent of summer brings do allow us chaps to spend a little more time outside once Peppa Pig has been reined in, the rubber ducks dispatched, and the lights are out. Here we hear from a range of Cotswold dads about the best way to unwind during the long summer evenings.


Name: Jonny Occupation: Lawyer Location: Cheltenham

Name: James Occupation: Sales Director Location: Cheltenham

Summertime Tip:

Summertime Tip:

When I have the chance I like nothing better than to head to East Glos for a game of tennis.

Although it's indoors and I therefore use it all year round, there's nothing better than a workout at Studio Fit in Leckhampton. The mental and physical benefits of a workout are well documented, but what I particularly like about this place is that you join a genuine community who are in it together. I've always been a gym-goer, but heading for a workout here means I know I will work out with a bunch of like-minded individuals who are motivated to get fit but not super competitive or judgemental. This atmosphere is created by the coaches, who are genuinely interested in getting the best out of you. For me, it's the best way to unwind after a long day but I don't have to do it at the expense of spending time with other people.

The club is really friendly and well set up for all abilities. It is an easy cycle from home and the club has such a range of programmes that we can all enjoy it as family. With 28 courts over a range of surfaces, it's a brilliant place to unwind whilst taking the day's frustrations out on a small yellow ball. The details: East Glos Tennis Club, Old Bath Road, Cheltenham GL53 7DF Reception open seven days a week. eastglos.co.uk

The details: Studio Fit is located on Mead Road Trading Estate, with another site opening in Gloucester. studio-fit.co.uk

'Oh, the summer night has a smile of light

and she sits on a sapphire throne.' Bryan cornwall 69


Name: Matt Occupation: Business Director and Dad Coach (author of this article) Location: Wotton-under-Edge

Name: Pete Occupation: Analyst Location: Cheltenham

Summertime Tip:

Summertime Tip:

For me the best way to use this time is to get space and perspective. To do this I head to the Tyndale Monument. Park at the base of the walk in North Nibley and follow the footpath up through the woods for fifteen minutes or so until you break out into the open air and enormous skies. Head towards the monument for breathtaking views of the Severn Estuary, South Gloucestershire, and Monmouthshire. On a clear evening you can see the Brecon Beacons. The sense of peace and space is a great way of regaining perspective and you can always enjoy a beer down in the Black Horse as a back-up.

Before the nights draw in I like to use the time to take a long walk in Woodchester Park. This tranquil wooded valley contains a 'lost landscape' with remains of an 18th- and 19th-century landscape park with a chain of five lakes. There are three different walks that wind their way through the woodland, so it's ideal if you need a quick leg stretch or a long summer stroll. And just ten minutes down the road are the pubs and restaurants of Nailsworth, where I will often head for a beer or coffee on my way home.

The details:

The details:

A guide to the Tyndale Monument Walk can be found here: tinyurl.com/y9a3krcq

Open from dawn to dusk.

The Black Horse: blackhorse-northnibley.co.uk

Head to nationaltrust.org.uk/woodchesterpark


Name: Sean Occupation: Engineer Location: Falfield Summertime Tip: Get on your bike. The longer summer nights mean two things for me: bikes and beer gardens. For me, this usually means cycling westwards towards the Severn, completing a loop that takes in two excellent real-ale pubs. The first of this is The Salutation Inn in Ham. This awardwinning CAMRA pub has huge range of real ales and ciders on tap and is exactly what the doctor ordered after a long cycle. After this I like to head south towards The Anchor at Oldburyon-Severn. Here you can relax in the extensive beer garden, or extend your ride by taking a pootle out to the Severn by heading through the gate opposite the pub. Either way, you'll be spoilt for choice with the stunning views and quality beers at both of these places. The details: The Salutation Inn: the-sally-at-ham.com The Anchor Inn: anchorinn-oldbury.co.uk

'The summer night is like perfection of thought.' Wallace Stevens 71


Postnatal Yoga: restore and strengthen your body after birth in classes run by a postnatal yoga specialist. Yoga Sculpt: a Hatha yoga class using light weights to create a unique class to tone your body and free your mind. Get your 6-class Flexipass for just ÂŁ45, with a free set of light weights for Sculpt students.

@NurtureYogaandWellness @Nurtureyogawellness


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Music Please, Maestro! Words by Kate Skeet. Picture by Gill Thomas.

'Music has charms to sooth a savage breast,' wrote William Congreve in 1697, and frankly, who hasn't needed that sort of soothing from time to time? In my experience, there's nothing I can feel that hasn't already been felt more deeply and in brighter technicolour by composers of previous decades or even centuries. But it can be hard to know where to find the perfect piece of music for your mood with the bewildering amount on offer. Allow me to introduce you to some of my favourites. I'm writing this in 2018, the 100th anniversary of the death of composer Claude Debussy, so have a listen to his Prélude à l'après-midi d'un faune. An impressionist painting of a piece, this has plenty of form in restoring sanity to new mothers. In an episode of BBC Radio 4's Soul Music earlier this year, it was the piece which lifted new mother Katya out of her feelings of depression and isolation, and a piece that she now uses in her work as a therapist to help others relax. My next choice is always guaranteed to bring my shoulders down a few inches: the first part of Franz Schubert’s String Quintet in C Major. It begins with feelings of tension and questioning, but by approximately two minutes in, it slides into the most gorgeous harmonised melody which makes me feel that despite any sadness (and Schubert knew all about that) there is still beauty and love in the world. Other good pieces for calming and relaxing are the Adagio from Mozart's Gran Partita for wind instruments, Pachelbel's Canon in D, Brahms' Intermezzo opus 118 no 2, and the theme from Bach's Goldberg Variations. Fancy a dance around the kitchen with your baby in your arms? Gentle motion seems to soothe discomfort, and more active movement with your toddler can celebrate good times. The Waltz of the Flowers from Tchaikovsky's Nutcracker Suite is perfect for times like this. It's also a great first ballet to go to if you fancy starting a Christmas tradition!


Other great pieces for trying out different steps as your little one learns to walk are Telemann's Gulliver Suite (walk like a giant or a tiny person), and the second movement of Prokofiev's 2nd Violin Concerto for a gentle swagger. Two top lively pieces are the Playful Pizzicato from Benjamin Britten's Simple Symphony – a perfect tummy-tickling tune – and for the days when you feel like running away to the circus, how about the fantastically extrovert Candide overture by Leonard Bernstein, another centenary composer in 2018? This summertime section of The Window Magazine suggests some seasonal pieces. Baroque composer Antonio Vivaldi produced the most famous seasonal music, and the poems he based his music on describe Summer as full of insects, birds, scorching heat, and storms. Not relaxing, but very descriptive! In contrast, Summertime from George Gershwin's 1930s opera is a beautiful lullaby. Finally, bedtime also means storytime, and if you'd rather turn to music than read yet another 'That's not my…' book, there are plenty of parent-and-child-friendly songs out there. I have enjoyed performing Rebecca Clarke's lively The Tailor and his Mouse to the very young audiences who come to our Lilliput Concerts in Cheltenham and Bristol. For me, part of the delight of classical music is the social aspect. I've been lucky enough to play and sing in groups for as long as I can remember, but you don't need a lifelong classical background to enjoy taking part in live music. I set up Lilliput Concerts (lilliputconcerts.org.uk) in 2013, specifically to provide top-quality live classical music, followed by top-quality cake, to parents and under-fours alike, and if you fancy experiencing the therapeutic joys of singing with others, Melody Mamas is a choir open to all, where babies are welcomed with open arms. Contact hello@miniaturemusic.co.uk for more details. Find a Spotify playlist with recommendations from various classical-musician parents and the pieces mentioned here: tinyurl.com/y6vr34me And for further reading and inspiration try Year of Wonder: Classical Music for Every Day by Clemency Burton-Hill or Music for Life: 100 Works to Carry You Through by Fiona Maddocks. 75


Parental Rights Words by Sarah Wilkinson.

As new parents we found the rules about returning to work, and our rights, completely baffling, so we have asked HR consultant Sarah Wilkinson to give us the low-down. Maternity leave and holiday Did you know that you continue to accrue holiday whilst you're on maternity leave? This is a good way of 'returning to work' before your SMP stops (usually around nine months), and you can 'return' on the hours that you previously worked, but be on holiday for a period of time, which means that you'll be paid as if you had returned to work on your old hours! How long is paternity leave? This can vary. Statutory paternity leave is for two weeks, but the statutory rates of pay can be quite a substantial drop. Many workplaces are now offering alternative enhanced schemes which might be on full pay, but only for one week. My top tip for getting around this is to take this option and then tag on a further week or two of holiday afterwards, thus ensuring no drop in pay! KIT days Where agreed between you and your employer, you may work for up to ten days during your maternity leave, without bringing your maternity pay to an end. These 'Keeping in Touch' days must be taken during your maternity leave (i.e. not during any periods

of holiday) and you will be paid only for the hours that you work. So, if you use one KIT day of five hours, you’ll be paid for the five hours and have nine remaining KIT days. It's up to you whether you use them, and if so, how many! You CAN be made redundant whilst on maternity/adoption/shared parental leave, BUT your employer has a statutory duty to offer you any suitable alternative vacancy, even if someone else is more qualified for the role (whether or not they are also at risk of redundancy). Contrary to popular belief, you're not entitled to return to work to the same role if you've been on maternity leave for more than 26 weeks. However, if you've taken more than 26 weeks' maternity leave then you have the right to return to your previous role unless this is no longer practical. This means that you could be offered a suitable alternative role, on no less favourable terms. Breastfeeding mamas Did you know that you're entitled to breaks to breastfeed your baby when you go back to work? That goes for expressing, too!


Directory There is so much to discover in the Cotswolds. Here are a few more things we thought you might like to know about. Childcare

Pitter Patter Nannies

Health

Nanny and maternity recruitment agency pitterpatternannies.co.uk

Allergy Dietician Nutrition, feeding advice, allergy/intolerance mfeeneydietetics@gmail.com

Prim and Wilf Nanny Bespoke childcare in Cheltenham & beyond primandwilf.com

Move Chiropractic Safe, effective treatment for families move-chiro.co.uk

Family Activities

Laura Brown Independent Speech & Language Therapist cotswoldslt.co.uk

Cookery Doodle Doo Children’s cooking classes, suitable from 3-10 years cookerydoodledoo.com/cheltenham Jennifer Beeston Artist. Creative workshops, parties, & murals colourclubspace.space

Lifestyle

Daphne and Margot Bright, comfortable & fun handmade clothes daphneandmargot.com Floella Interiors Interior design, soft furnishings, styling floella.uk Little Cheltenham Editorial style portraiture for business & home littlecheltenham.com Mouse About Town Professional & affordable family photographer mouseabouttown.co.uk

Relaxed Birthing Honest, realistic, & positive hypnobirthing courses relaxedbirthing.co.uk

Self-Care

Holistic Hideout Mobile massage in your own home theholistichideout.co.uk MumsFit Specialist pelvic floor and core rehabilitation mumsfit.co.uk One Grove Pre- & post-natal pilates specialists; easy parking onegrove.co.uk Sali Green Skincare Organic, vegan collection of gentle skincare saligreenskincare.co.uk Simon Smith Hairdressing Bespoke hairdressing experience in the Cotswolds simonsmithuk.com

Professional

Natural Essence Photography Specialist newborn, baby & family photographer naturalessencephotography.co.uk

DMW Administrative Services Professional & personal administrative support dmwadmin.co.uk

Thistle Moon Freelance illustration inspired by nature www.thistlemoon.co.uk

Flexperience Recruitment for part-time, flexible roles flexperience.co.uk

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Epilogue Thank you for reading the first edition of The Window Magazine. We hope you have enjoyed the feel of real words from real people, on real pages, and added a few of your own scribbles and doodles to the mix. Make it your own!

The second edition will be published in autumn 2019, and we are looking forward to discovering more wonderful people and interesting projects that help to shed light on the fantastically creative Cotswolds area. We'd really love to hear what you think about this edition, as that will help us shape the next one, and if you have any suggestions for unsung heroes, interesting brands, or sanity-saving advice for parents in our area, please drop us a line on our email at thewindowmagazine@gmail.com or send us a message on on any of our social media. Join us over on Instagram @thewindow_magazine and follow the #wednesdaywindow hashtag. Post your own pictures with this hashtag and tell us where you are reading your copy. Has the baby got involved? Did you lend the magazine to anyone? We will share the view from your window (literal and metaphorical) on our Instagram stories. We are also on Facebook at facebook.com/thewindowmagazine and on Twitter as @TheWindow_Mag – come and join the conversation. You can subscribe to our mailing list on thewindowmagazine.co.uk and be the first to hear about when the next edition is available to pre-order. Until next time.



We are the

windows through which

our children

first see

the world. let us be

conscious of the view. – Katrina Kenison –


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