The Rider's Mag June 2015 V17-n04

THE RIDER’S MAG

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June 2015 Volume 17 - #4

Our Troops!!!

The Magazine for Riders

PAC E L AW F I R M Serious I n j u r y Lawyers

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Table of Contents

Pg. 4 - What’s Shakin’

Lots of events all Summer Long.

Pg. 6 - Cruising with Critter

www.hipscycle.ca 900 Colborne St. East 519-756-6218 Brantford, Ontario

Store Hours Mon-Fri 9am - 5pm Sat. 9am - 1pm

The Boss just keeps sure does alot of travelling

Pg. 17 - Fort Erie Swap Meet 2015

Sherri O’Irish does some shopping.

Pg. 19 - B.R.O. Niagara’s Cover the Kids Run 2015 JR spends the day with B.R.O.

Pg. 22 - International Female Ride Day 2015

Lisa in Niagara and Sharon in Elora Events everywhere

Pg. 24 - Fighting For Your Rights

Rooster’s Back from NCOM in Denver

Pg. 26 - On The Road

JR Remembers an old friend and Writer.

Pg. 27 - Joke Page Pg. 30 - Shop/Builder Of The Month

Since 1988

Trike My Bike a Windsor Secret

Pg. 32 - May Calendar and all thats going on.

Trike My Bike

Pg. 34 - Comparing The Little Things: Victory with Harley Donny Petersen Starts on the Floor Boards

Pg. 36 - Outspoken Cycles Grand Opening The Mag Hag Sees a New Shop in Uxbridge Pg. 38 - Whispers of a Neoteric Nomad That Northern Guy, Events all over The North

WE DO IT ALL! M.T.O. INSPECTION STATION PARTS AVAILABLE FROM ALL SUPPLIERS

Pg. 40 - Kitchener H-D Ladies Garage Party Manon Gets some new Leather.

Pg. 42 - Feature Bike

“Mini Street Glide”

Pg. 44 - Biker Church Pastor Ken is filling in for Pastor Dave.

Pg. 45 - Hogtown Cycles Spring Open House

ALL LICENSED MECHANICS

Kaz Visits Lucan and likes what he sees.

Pg. 46 - From the far East………Ontario that is.

Beau’s been to the Swap Meet that starts it all off.

Pg. 50 - Flat Trackin’

A New X Games Event for the 2015 season

Pg. 52 - Ladies and Their Harleys Pg. 56 - Sticker Stories

Sharon’s got her Boyfriend and Husband Busy .

Published by:

THE RIDER’S MAG INC.

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Managing Editor: ACE Wolske Editor in Chief: Rick Davis Office Manager: Diane Davis Publisher Emeritus: Alex J.R. MacRae Editor Emeritus: J.B. Ballantine

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Eastern Ont./Western Que. Rep: Beau Rooney 613-295-4444 Southwestern Ontario Rep: Tim Armstrong 519-252-9631 Northern Ontario Sales Rep.: Guy Levasseur 705-662-1526

JULY 11, 2015- 10am START

Contributing Writers

Aaron Hesmer, Al Marentette, Bad Bob, Beau Rooney, Dangerous Donny, Donny Petersen, David Neals, JR McCrea, Jonathan Musson, Kaz, Manon Kellman, Rossaire, Danni, The Mag Hag, Roostah, Sherri O’Irish, Sharon Nicholson Contruibuting Cartoonists

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THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 3

What’s

Shakin’

Every Tuesday

All Summer The Albion Hotel’s World Famous Bike Night & BBQ All Day at the Albion, 1 Main Street, Bayfield 519-5652641 Tombstones Motorcycles/Tom & Jerry’s Bike Night At 10593 Yonge Street in Richmond Hill. Food and Drink Specials plus lots more. See their facebook page for more details facebook.com/tombstonesmotorcycles

Every Wednesday

Malicious Cycle’s Bide Night & BBQ At their shop 3595 St. Clair E. Unit 7 in Scarborough.

Check their website for more Info: www. maliciouscycleandclothing.com Keleher’s Bike Nights Charity Fund raiser, BBQ, 50/50, Prizes. At Keleher’s 154 King St. East, Cambridge 519-650-9595 facebook. com/pages/Kelehers-Western-Wear/ Independent Riders Bike Night The Regency Athletic Resort, 8068 Mountain Rd. Niagara Falls. Live Music, Door Prizes, Food & Drink Specials.

Suck Bang Blow Bike Night 60 cent Wings, Door prizes, Drink Specials and No Cover Charge. Come on out to Stoney Creek, 443 Highway 20 East at the end of Tapleytown Road.

Jacox Harley-Davidson® Baker Street Bobber Run Every WEDNESDAY, departing at 6:30 from Jacox H-D® - Destination, The Baker Street Station in Guelph.

Please RSVP our Parts & Accessories Specialist, Andy Hicks at ahicks@jacoxharley.com weekly, the Tuesday before each ride. For more information please contact our Marketing & Promotions Coordinator, Julie Martin at jmartin@jacoxharley.com or at 905-858-6763.

Every Thursday

Clare’s Niagara’s Bike Night “The Tradition Continues” Starting June 4th with a PigoutPig Roast. Phil N the Blanks supplying the Music and The Welland County MC as the Guest Club. Different Guests and Entertainment Every Thursday until August 27th. Check the weekly events at www.claresharleydavidson.com

Every Staurday

Welland County M.C. Dirt Track Racing Welland County Speedway, 603 Netherby Rd. Welland. Fun for the Whole Family. More info contact: 905-734-7058 or 905686-3422 or www.WellandMotorcycleClub.com

& Zuber Company LITIGATION

COUNSEL

David A. Zuber, LL.B.

Certified as a Specialist in Civil Litigation

Free Consultation Personal Injury Disability Claims Medical Malpractice Tel: 416.362.5005 Fax: 416.362.5289 THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 4

Email: dzuber@zubco.com Website: www.zubco.com

May

May 30th- Duke’s Harley-Davidson’s 10th Anniversary Celebration and VON Ride

At Dukes 5 Classic Car Dr. Blenheim, Ride Registration from 10-11am $20 per person, Live Music, BBQ, Prizes and Biker TV will be there so come on out and meet Heather Ireland and the crew. 1-877-354-0650 or www.dukeshd.com

May 30th- 3rd Annual Ride For Lupus

Guelph Legion, 57 Watson Rd. S. Guelph. Registration starts at 8:30 am, Kickstand Up at 10am. Riders $25 Passengers $15, includes Lunch. More Info: at www.rideforlupus.ca

June

our Marketing & Promotions Coordinator, Julie Martin at jmartin@jacoxharley.com or at 905-858-6763.

June 13th- Big Daddy’s Cow Paddy 4th Annual Poker Run

Registration 9-10:30 am Breakfast Available, Start location to be announced, check www.

BigDaddysCowpaddy.ca or call Greg or Susie at 613-926-0799

June 14th- Bacchus At The Final Frontier Property, 304518 Southline Road. 12 M.C. Noon. Ride to Clinton Chili Fest to follow. Check out the Annual Bike Show June 6th- Dix Davies Celebration of a Life Memorial A.B.A.T.E. Facebook group for more details.

June 6th- Ride for Her Ottawa

671 River Road, Gloucester. Ride for Ovarian Cancer, Everyone Welcome, Registration $25 includes Continental Breakfast & BBQ Lunch. For more information and to Preregister www.rideforher.ca

30 Arden Ave. Hamilton, Registration 11am-Noon All Makes Welcome.

In Support of The CNIB. More Info: www.

BacchusMCOntario.com

June 20thLions Foundati on of Canada Airport Restaurant, #35 HWY N. Lindsay. Registration 9 – - Oakville 10:30 am poker Run Starts at Noon Ride for Guide Dogs 152 Wilson St. Oakville, Registration 9-10am Kickstands up June 6th- Rocky’s H-D Ice Cream Social June 6th- Kawartha Kids Ride & Poker Run

Join the crew at Rocky’s H-D, 900 Wilton Grove Rd, London, at 3pm for some Hot Dogs and Prizes and then join them on a ride to Port Stanley for some Ice Cream.

10am, Download the donation form online at www.dogguides.com/ride/ or Contact Emelia at 905-8422891 Ext 226

June 7th- 7th Annual National Memorial Ride

Canadian Aviation and Space Museum, 11 Aviation Pkwy., Ottawa.

Rendezvous at 1300hours (1pm) Join us for the ride to Remember our fallen and wounded. We Welcome all Veterans and Supporters.

June 13th-4th Annual 81 East Toronto Show & Shine

Enter your Bike to Win a Trophy, 12:30pm at 3595 St. Clair Ave East, Scarborough. Entry is a $10 Donation.

June 13th- New Hamburg Full Throttle Poker Run

Registration starts at 9am, at The Waterloo Arms, 338 Waterloo St., New Hamburg. Kickstands up at 10:45am or register Online at www.newhamburgfullthrottle. com

June 13th- Telus Ride for Dad Durham

Scugog Community Centre, 1655 Reach Street, Port Perry Pre-registration Fri. June 12 5-8pm, registration 7:30-9:30am Kickstand up at 10am. Live Entertainment Breakfast, Lunch, Prizes & Poker Run. www.ridefordad.ca

June 13th- Jacox Harley-Davidson® Adrenaline Afternoon/Open House

From 11:30 – 3:00 at Jacox H-D®. Join us for Live, Music by the Roaming Coyotes, BBQ, Beaver Tails Food Truck & Various Vendors. For more information please contact

June 21st- 5th Annual Bobcaygeon Bike Fest

Downtown Bobcaygeon, 9am-5pm Family Event, For more info Call Doug 705-793-1751 or www.BikeFestOntario.com

June 27th- Bacchus MC Sudbury’s 1st Annual Swap Meet

1010 Lorne St. Sudbury, 10am – 6pm in support of The Elgin Street Mission, Donation of Non-perishable Food or Cash upon entry.

For table Information contact sbmcsm@gmail.com

Continued on Page 61

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 5

Cruising With Critter Well spring has finally arrived in the lovely Land of the Trillium but Mother Nature being the miserable bitch that we all know she can be at times, is still throwing the odd bit of crap at us as we move out of April and into the merry Month of May. My trike is still not ready to go yet although I have been promised that the few remaining things that need to be done to her will be completed for next weekend and other than the reverse and the hand shift/foot clutch which will have to wait awhile. I really hope so as I want to get started on Petoonia’s makeover ASAP. Bad Bob has done a fantastic job on her beer box modifications and Roger from Extreme Measures Custom Paint assisted with, applying some coats of black and clear coat and when I get my fairing back I can get my brother CB over to help me lay out and paint in the purple flames with my airbrushes and purple pearl paint, get it all clear coated and then tear the old parts off and install the new ones along with a few new items that I’ve picked up to make the Pretty Purple Pig look and feel even prettier.

Then I can try out that new LED Headlight that Daytona Power Sports in Weston sent me to evaluate. Until then I’m riding around on a partially dressed Petoonia and man, I miss having that beer box in which to carry all my gear.

You will notice the Black Bitch 2 has undergone a spa day too as my buddy Daniel at Alfagraf in Mississauga designed and applied some great looking vinyl graphics to her, I think they look fantastic and I’m getting lots of favourable comments on her as well.

Fate has once again stepped in and claimed the life of

Royal Br. 559 Canadian Lisle, Legion Ontario 5th Annual Motorcycle

Show & Shine

Saturday July 11th, 2015 8439 Main Street West Lisle, Ontario Registration: 10 AM

Music

BBQ

50/50

All On The Largest Patio in Ontario Classes include: Foreign, Ladies, Radical, Paint, Chrome, Vintage, Trike, American, Stock and Peoples Choice.

All Makes & Models Welcome More Info Call: 705-424-2995 lisle.legion@gmail.com THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 6

yet another Brother. Ken MacDonald who along with wife Katherine were long time contributors and writers for The Riders Mag passed away suddenly April 23, 2015.

Ken was a founding member of the Sarnia Lambton Bikers Rights Organization and was extremely active in the motorcycle community throughout the Province and ran the very popular and well attended Alvinston Motorcycle Swap Meet. He was also a proud member of local 1256 Carpenters Union, a dedicated husband and father. Ken and Katherine were also dealers for the Children’s Safety Harness that was designed to give children a safety edge while being passengers on a motorcycle.

I made the trip out to Sarnia to pay my respects and joined a very large contingent of friends and family from across the Province who had come to do the same. It was a decent day weather-wise although still quite cool but there were a lot of attendees who rode to the memorial as a final tribute and a show of respect to a fellow biker who was always a strong advocate and Champion of not only biker’s rights but human

rights. Ken did not just talk the talk but walked the walk.

There were more going to attend that evening and they had some special plans for then but I had to move along. I’m sure Ken would have been pleased with the send-off.

Ken will be sorely missed by all that knew him but loving him wasn’t always easy. There was no “easy sell” with Ken. You had to know what you were trying to sell and be able to prove it and then back it up. He could be considered abstinent and stubborn at times but he was stalwart in his beliefs and would stand by those beliefs until proven wrong. But he was a fighter who could chose a side and once that choice was made, you need not look to see if he had your back.

The slideshows and picture displays and the monuments of Ken’s working gear paid silent tribute to a hard working family man who definitely left his mark and blazed a trail for others to follow and who tried his damndest to make this World a better place!

My deepest condolences go out to his widow Katherine his Sons Conrad and Cameron his family his Brothers and friends.

Ken MacDonald – October 3, 1968 – April 23, 2015 GBNF – RIP – L&R

The fates have also chosen to claim yet another dear friend of mine Francis VanDusen who was an extremely talented artist and silk screener and was well known in the biker scene as he did a lot of jobs for a lot of clubs, individuals, organizations and businesses and there are many examples of his work adorning many men and women as well as their kids from one coast to the other and beyond. If you have an UNFKNBLVBL shirt you are wearing one of his creations and there are lots of them out there. He also did many designs of Support our Troops shirts for the various branches of The Royal Canadian Legion that were very popular as he was very patriotic. Francis made his mark on the World one shirt at a time.

His death was completely unexpected and was quite a shock.

I took the day off work and rode Petoonia over to his funeral and wasn’t surprised to find a good sized crowd of friends and family who had gathered to say their good-byes.

He had good heart and was always ready to help out a friend and he didn’t die a rich man in terms of money but Francis had a wealth of knowledge and amassed a lot of friends and will be missed.

“It’s Saint Peter to you....

Not Pete!”

RIP Francis L&R

Trike My Bike Calendar Feature I personally love doing these features as they not only showcase an advertisers shop and services but they give me an insight in what the businesses are really all about and they become more than just voices on the phone or the party on the other end of an e mail or text.

I drove out to Windsor to do the feature shoot and interview on Trike My Bike. I had never been here before and although I had a decent working knowledge of the city punched it into my handy GPS and she got me there quite handily and as I rolled into the parking lot I noticed several signs that proclaimed them to be not just Trike my Bike but Daymark Windsor among other things and there was

We wish you had asked before giving the Angels UNFKNBLVBL Shirts.

What is that you’re smoking????

R R

R

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 7

an e bike parked on the roof. I parked beside one of the very distinctive buildings and made my way inside, passing a very mixed collection of e bikes, mobility scooters, motorcycles and several trikes with no one make being predominant along the way. “Interesting!” I thought.

The large bright showroom also had quite a mix of machines of various makes on display along with helmets and other riding accessories and a large display of Amsoil products. Several customers were milling around and I immediately started trying to figure out which bikes I would shoot and what angles I would try to shoot from. There was one contraption that really caught my eye and I knew that I would have to find out more about.

It was a decent day weather-wise although a touch cool, and I figured on doing some shots out there as well.

I had yet to meet the model as they were supplying her but I had been told that she was a very pretty girl.

A very pleasant looking lady with a beaming smile who turned out to be Lenn’s partner Christine approached me.

I introduced myself and she informed me that owner Lenn would be there very soon and that the model would be along as well.

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 8

So I busied myself getting shots of the showroom and checking that contraption that kept grabbing my attention.

Owner Lenn rushed in and came straight to me and introduced himself, as, although we had talked many times on the phone, this was our first face to face meeting. I explained what I wanted to do in terms of the shoot and asked if there was anything that he wanted to feature in particular when Christine again appeared with a very attractive young lady who would be the model and it turns out that she was Christine’s daughter Sarah.

We got right to work with Lenn moving various bikes out to where I wanted to shoot them and Sarah was great to work with and we moved from one bike to another both inside and outside and even included some of the e bikes and scooters into the mix.

The contraption that had caught my attention was an electric vehicle from Daymark for whom Lenn is a dealer distributor. It was quite the rig! It had a well-built cab with a full lighting system, windshield wipers and roll up side windows and it even had a heater. I immediately thought of how handy this unit would be for my Managing Editor Al who requires a mobility scooter due to a bout of Gilliam Barre Syndrome that left him with mobility issues. I even got to drive it around the lot and was quite impressed and had I had the cash I would have loaded it up right there and then and hauled it back to Newmarket but the reality of my budget

raised its ugly head blocked out all thoughts of such a purchase at that time.

I got the grand tour of the rest of the place including a whole other store on the other side of the lot which was just jammed with all kinds of scooter, e bikes, dirt bikes, mini bikes and just too much to take in in one brief visit. There were huge wall displays of Airsoft guns, R/C planes, cars, trucks, boats and drones complete with cameras and lots of other fun stuff that would make any kid and many adults drool.

Lenn told me of the R/C drag races that they hold in the alley out back of the fun plaza and showed me where the planned racetrack will be built (It has now been built according to Lenn in my phone conversation today and despite the rain, they still had a great turn out and the races are on.) and other plans for the future.

It was now time to do the interview portion and I thought I was prepared as I had my notebook with all the headings already laid out in the usual format and was ready to ask questions in that order and just put the information into the allotted spaces and I’d be done.

That is where the plan fell apart. Trike my Bike in itself and all the offshoot businesses contained on that premises and all that they have going on defy being formatted, pigeon holed or clearly defined. When you include Lenn and Christine and Christine’s daughter Sarah into the equation and start hearing what has gone on in their lives, my poor notes didn’t stand a chance as they were all over the place and I was resorting to scribbling little notes, sub notes, and what-not here there and everywhere with lines and arrows and underlines, asterisks, exclamation marks and whatever I could do to have a hope in Hell of deciphering it all when I went to actually write it all up for these pages. I was like Officer Odee in Arlo Guthrie’s’ song “Alice’s Restaurant” with all the 8x10 photos with notes and arrows and such on the back and I didn’t fare much better than he. I was wishing I had different colour highlighters with me.

Simply put, they are truly amazing people who have been through a lot in their lives but do more for their community than anyone I have ever known and with them, it is more than just mere gesture or superficial actions, fundraising or donating money or just showing up at functions (Not that those things are unimportant). What they do is full on, hands on involvement not for recognition or attention but because it is the right thing to do and that is the type of people they are.

They have seen their share of pain, heartbreak and hardship in their lives but that doesn’t seem to have phased them, jaded them or made them bitter. After meeting them,

I’m convinced that if you were to look up humanitarian in the dictionary you would see their picture. From simple acts of kindness like sewing a homeless persons torn pants or providing compassion to someone going through hard times or having severe health issues or facing death, these people do it all.

I came to do an article and came away with a story that still has my head spinning.

If you are in the area drop by and check out this amazing place and the amazing people that run it.

The Albion Hotel Being that I was in the Sarnia area for Ken MacDonald’s Memorial, in need of a cold beer with Beautiful Downtown Bayfield only a short drive away. I had absolutely no desire to go back the way I came and face the 401 during rush hour traffic jam that was sure to be happening once I got near Mississauga and Toronto. I decided instead to plot a course through the beautiful countryside and head home that way and make a long overdue

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 9

columns and whenever we talked.

They also have very popular, eye catching ads that run in the Mag. So here I was ready to see first-hand, what all the fuss was about.

I slid up on a bar stool and just about fell off it again when the striking young bartender responded to my saying “Of course you don’t have 50.” With WE CAN KEEP YOU “Sure we have 50!” and produced a nice cold bottle RIDING ALL YEAR as proof.

“This is a damn good start!” I said to myself.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and spun around to ROUND! see the smiling face of owner, Kim. WE’RE HERE ALL YEAR We had met before at other events and he had STOP IN AND SAY HI recognized me when I came in.

Kim went on to tell me of some of the plans CUSTOM WORKS that he had for this riding season that include, of MTO Certified Shop course, their famous weekly Tuesday night Bike 7 MAIN STREET EAST SELKIRK ONT. N0A 1P0 Night and Barbecue that will have already resumed by the time you read this and that the first Tuesday stop at one of our long-time Mag supporter and advertiser, in July will be a Blues Night and he had some great talent The Albion Hotel. lined up for it.

I rolled into Town and parked in front of the building I got a few shots of the bar along with Kim and his that I’d seen many pictures of and had heard so many great attractive, friendly and energetic crew before heading for comments about from anyone who had ever been there. One home. of our contributors; Kaz has long raved about it in both his It’s a great spot with a great atmosphere and now that I’ve finally found it, will have to find my way back here again.

Fort Erie Motorcycle Swap Meet Sherri O’Irish had such a great time last year she wanted to come along again and so met me at Casa Critter in the early morning and left her car at my place and we took off together with one stop in Aurora to pick up Deadly Doug who was in search for parts for his persnickety Panhead and then on to Burlington to pick up an essential part of our entourage, Senior along with his seat.

Bad Bob, who elected to ride his bike, was at the 5th Wheel in Grimsby waiting to join us for breakfast before continuing on our journey to Fort Erie.

It was a gorgeous day with clear blue skies and glorious sunshine providing warmth that had drawn out hundreds of riders who were seizing the moment to blow out the winter cobwebs and showing up here in droves.

PARTS, ACCESSORIES, AND INSTALLATION

WE’VE GOT QUAD AND ATV PARTS

CHOPPERS

905-776-1111

1995 FATBOY MUST BE SEEN!

Certified and Serviced

29945 Hwy. 48, Pefferlaw Ontario

905-715-0070 / 705-437-2291

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 10

The lot was packed by the time we got there and got Senior settled into his usual spot just inside the door with his stool and a large supply of Riders Mags before I headed out to try and find a place to park. That wasn’t an easy task as the place was really jammed and I was directed out onto the field where I got The Black Bitch 2 settled in, gathered up my camera and headed in to join the rest and check out this event that has always been great every year and this was destined to be even bigger and better as Owner Shawn puts a lot of time and energy into not just promotion but keeping things fresh and exciting and each year tries to out-do the previous year to make it more than just a swap meet but an event that will make people talk about it and compel them to come back again next year. He has games set up outside along with The World’s Shortest Poker Run and a motor blow-up contest while inside he has Trivia contests run every half hour with prizes run by DJ, Jim Pentelake from Eagles Nest and The Man vs, Woman Biker teardown.

Hankster from Boot hill Hearse had his fantastic hearse on display and getting lots of attention as he always does and I stopped to talk awhile with him and learned of his plans for the near feature and that he’d gotten good response to his recent article in the Mag and we are looking forward to more input from Hank in future Issues.

Len from Len’s Auto was there with his great display of trike conversions and had a huge crowd around him throughout the day as well.

Bikes were parked everywhere and constant roar filled the air as droves of bikes came and went to give it the true feel of a biker event.

Inside the crowds descended on the vendors who were

prepared for the onslaught with lots of great deals on parts and other assorted goodies and treasures.

The usual suspects were there as well as some new ones both in terms of vendors like Fred Hale and in attendees and it is apparent that Shawn’s shameless promotion of the event does pay dividends as I saw lots of new faces.

The event has been expanded and there was even a tattoo artist in the one hall and she looked to be busy all day.

The time flew by and as we were out of Mags having handed out over 800 copies in the few hours that we were there and it was time to gather up our crew and head for home.

Another great day at an event that just keeps getting better.

Malicious Cycle 1st Annual Swap Meet The trike still not ready and with what was shaping up to be gorgeous day with beautiful weather instead of the shit that the weather stations had been promising for days, I unloaded non-essential items from the side bags and I reloaded them with essential things like my camera and Mags while leaving space for my hat as the beer box was still off getting modified and improved and I was determined to ride today.

I headed down towards Scarborough, Petoonia running like a dream and we were soon pulling into the already full parking lot in front of Malicious Cycle and Clothing. I parked Petoonia gathered up my hat and camera and went to work.

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 11

Helmets, Vests, Chaps, Jackets, Shirts, Etc...

Tune-Ups, Body Repair and Motorcycle Painting 223 Queen St., Dunnville, Ont 905-774-8314 THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 12

This is the first Swap meet that they have done at this location but it won’t be the last as the turn-out and the response to it was fantastic.

These guys are serious about this business and are constantly doing things to keep things fresh and keep the interest and support that has been so phenomenal, alive. They realize that you don’t do that by resting on your laurels.

They are genuine and very aggressive businessmen.

I found Bryan busy mounting a new windshield on a bike for a customer but he’s never too busy to say hello.

I saw many familiar faces on my travels through the parking lot and spent a lot of time shooting the shit with this one and that one.

My buddy Android appeared from under one of the canopies behind a table full of parts. He told me of a presentation that was being made by Trapper Kane posthumously to his Dad, Sam Magee, a true War hero and member of The Devil’s Brigade whose funeral I’d covered last year the following week and I told him that I’d try to make it but couldn’t promise.

I’m very sorry Android but I just couldn’t get there. L&R to you and your family.

I hung around a while but still had another event to cover out in Mississauga that afternoon so I said my goodbyes and headed out.

Great event guys! See you at the next one!

Jacox H-D Adrenaline Afternoon It was a glorious afternoon again not at all like the crap that had been forecast by those weasel weather folks whom I’m sure just have a dart board with different weather conditions on it, close their eyes and throw the dart, then announce it to us trusting souls as if it was scientifically proven and then have side bets to see if what they picked actually happens.

Anyhow I rolled into Jacox’s parking lot after being diverted by the nice young lady at the end of the first entrance that leads to the front of the building to the rear driveway to find it packed with bikes. I could have followed the driveway around to the front parking area but since there were lots of bikes and people back there I elected to park right there and start my roving reporter mission from there.

I immediately spotted the lovely Julie Martin as she has

a tendency to stand out in a crowd and she smiled and waved before tearing off to tend to one of the many things that need tending to in an event such as this.

A buddy of mine young Ralph Tota Jr. who was now working there came over to say hello. Actually he is the son of an old friend, Ralph Sr. but has grown up to be a friend of his own accord and it is always a pleasure to see either of them.

He is just thrilled to be working there and considers it to be his dream job. It is so nice to see that kind of enthusiasm in anyone.

I worked my way around to the front of the building stopping to talk to this one and that one along the way and getting great comments on the Mag and the changes that we have

made along the way.

Speaking of improvements, I was very pleased to see those made by the crew here at Jacox to make the parking lot so much more appealing and user friendly for these types of events. There had been in the past a very definite lack of seating and

shade now there were picnic tables set under great canopies that made all the difference in the World and people felt like staying a lot longer and it looked inviting.

They had food trucks that were serving up some pretty amazing food that was more than just hamburgers and hotdogs but a real variety of menu items that included poutine. There was also an ice cream vendor who seemed to be a hit as well.

A fantastic band “Bad to the Bone” was turning out some great old Rock and Roll tunes throughout the afternoon. I’ve seen the guys many times before and they do an awesome job.

The comments that I heard from many in attendance that afternoon, told me the effort that has gone into this event has been noted and the word will soon get out that when Jacox H-D has an event take a ride over and check it out. Our own Bad Bob also came out for the afternoon and was very pleased with the improvements as well.

I ran into many familiar faces throughout the day including two truly wonderful people that I met for the first time last year at a Black Hawks MC event at Suck Bang Blow in Stoney Creek. Major (Ret’d) Don Kennedy C.D from The Royal Hamilton

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 13

Light Infantry (WR) and HooJung Jones from the National Unification Advisory Council.

HooJung was instrumental in getting my Uncle George Gravelle a special medal that the Korean Government was issuing to those who served in the Korean War, (As my Uncle had done.) or their surviving family. My brother Larry who is

a huge military buff and family historian was able to confirm this and through the efforts of HooJung was able to have the medal formally presented. I was unable to attend the presentation ceremony but my brother received the medal on behalf of my Uncle and the family. Thank you both for you efforts it is something that our family will cherish in memory of a man who meant a lot to us and it illustrates how chance encounters can lead to unexpected outcomes. HooJung is very active in getting recognition for those who served in the Korean War throughout this Country and in the United States as well and is proud of the War Memorial in Hamilton.

The place was busy both inside and out and I ventured in to have a brief chat with the always affable Keith Marshall and take a look around.

I still had to get to a couple more places before I could call it a day so I said my goodbyes slid into Petoonia’s plush seat and headed north.

I had a great time, thanks!

Dusty Days – 1st Annual Memorial Ride I had wanted to ride out to Woodstock but the weather was shitty here and really didn’t want to leave here in full rain gear and run into good weather when I arrived and try to stow the wet weather gear on semi naked Petoonia or ride around in sunshine dressed for a torrential downpour. So I elected to go the Black Bitch 2 route and drive to a biker event. I wasn’t going to be able to go on the actual ride anyhow due to a schedule that is on steroids and leaves me very little spare time.

My GPS got me to the ABATE Woodstock’s new C.H. with no trouble at all as I learned how to reprogram that snarky sounding, know it all bitch that had been giving me directions which I chose to ignore half the time just because I didn’t like her tone, which somewhat defeated the purpose of me buying a GPS in the 1st place but my new GPS girl voice “Emily” is much better than that other creepy snotty sounding chick “Clare” so all is

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 14

well!

I made my rounds and immediately found Heavenly Heather Ireland from Biker TV, who has been “The Riders Mag Calendar Girl” twice now along with that Tom Mann guy. Heather and I have been running into each other all over the place lately and I’m hoping that people are going to begin to talk, as it’s good for an old man’s selfimage! Heather quipped that she was stalking me to which I replied “Only in my wildest dreams Darl’n! And I don’t even dream that wild!”

I worked my way around the parking lot which was quite full with about 70 to 100 bikes by my rough calculations, a process that involves estimating the number of square feet in the lot and multiplying the estimated number of bikes per square yard dividing by 7, then converting those numbers into metric and then asking someone who seems to be in charge how many bikes do you think are here? So I say 70 to 100 bikes were there and went on a ride to not only commemorate the life and times of “Dusty” but to help a charity that does a lot of good in the community.

Stopping into their great CH for a cold one courtesy of the ever lovely Cristal and the not quite as lovely Horse, before wandering out through the crowd to gab with many of the friends I’ve made there over the years and everyone was anxious to put winter behind them and get on with summer.

Apart from different chapters of ABATE, I saw Phantom Thunder MC and Outlaws MC and others out to support the ride along with independents and riders from all over. Also out

for the day along with his Dad was a young flat track racer that the Chapter supports by the name of Boyd Deadman who has been doing really well on the track.

The proceeds of the run went to “Help a Child Smile” a part of RPM Magazines foundation who do a Ride for Smiles Ride on June 13, 2015.

For more info go to their website www. rideforsmiles.ca or call Ray – 519-732-8480.

They fund a number of programs and services to assist families

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 15

All Aluminum Trailers

We got wind of this story over the weekend and felt it was worth mentioning. Camp Sunshine, a boys and girls camp run by The Kiwanis Club in the Windsor area had become run-down and in need of extensive repair or else it would be condemned.

The cabins all needed new roofs, electrical work, and major repair to bunks, screens and other things along with a lot of TLC to bring them back to where they could be used by anyone and the property itself was in need of clean up.

The Bad Examples Riding Club decided to take the bull by the horns and donate their time and talent to bring Camp Sunrise back to life. They dedicated the entire long weekend to the task and got it done. Word of this undertaking got out and other Clubs and individuals decided to get involved as well. I don’t know for sure which other Clubs Light Weight No More Rust were involved or the names of the individuals but I heard some Queensmen were there.

Better Fuel Economy They had some skilled labour in their midst and everyone else just did what they could do.

We were following the story on Facebook as the project got under way each subsequent posting www.actiontrailers.ca 1-866-885-2569 showed that and more people and businesses were joining in. One example of how this was 4728 Egremont Dr. Strathroy, ON ( 15 min. west of London ) catching on was; apparently there was a sale on ceiling fans at a local store and one person could with kids being treated for Cancer at Hamilton’s McMaster Children’s Hospital. ABATE Woodstock presented Raymond only afford to buy and donate four and they needed six more.

Knight of RPM The call went out and others had soon donated the other six. with a donation of $1,000.00 that afternoon.

I’m not 100% sure of that amount but it rang a bell with me and I’m sure if I’m wrong someone will let me know or just pass it off as an old guy making yet another mistake.

I wouldn’t be going on the ride so I hung in until the pack Lori and the crew at Dulux paint at Dougall and Tecumseh left then headed for home. It was a good day spent with donated all the paint, brushes, rollers and trays to spruce up some great people.

The Rescue and renovation of Camp Sunrise –Bad Example the cabins and when they went to The Zehr’s Super Store on Walker Rd. to get water for the crew the Bad Examples RC RC had 54 cases of water donated to the cause by manager John and his sister Veronica Amaral.

They had a crew in charge of feeding this huge volunteer work force as well and I hear that two pigs were cooked to perfection in a learn as you go situation but everyone appears to have survived.

To us this was a great story of how this club took the initiative to start a much needed project and how others in the community got involved and they all pulled together to accomplish a common goal. Everyone benefits from such an interaction, the kids, because they can use the camp again and those who made it happen, as anything that brings diverse groups of people together is a good thing as it forms long lasting bonds and creates understanding that didn’t exist before and helps bring down barriers and stereotypes.

Good job guys and gals. You are a good Bad Examples.

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THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 16

Fort Erie Swap Meet 2015 SWAPPING WINTER FOR SPRING

The coming of May marked many things, like warmer weather, trees and flowers blooming, and Motorcycle Awareness month, but the biker kick-start in South Central Ontario, is always the Fort Erie Motorcycle Swap Meet. Once again, the Mag crew set off on our road trip in the early morning hours, cruisin and stylin in the newly decked out Rider’s Mag truck, the Black Bitch. By the time we stopped for breakfast, Critter, Sr, BDR Doug, Bad Bob (on his bike), and I were in tow for the event.

On our drive down, the closer we got, the more it was evident that Mother Nature had waved her hands over the freshly cut lawns, newly leafing trees, and graced us with clear, sunny skies and warm temperatures. When we arrived, we saw a hundred or more bikes parked on the lawn, sidewalks and pavement, which was a sight for sore eyes after the long hard winter.

We picked our usual spot in the arena foyer, and Sr quickly got down to dishing out the mags in between the “Hi, how are ya’s?”. He’s quite the character, a familiar face to a lot of people, and he enjoys the atmosphere astride his custom seat.

The arena floor was bustling with crowds of people picking over parts, finding treasures, checking out the vendors, and for the most part socializing with friends they saw. I bumped into quite a few people I knew or recognised from past events, from far and wide, and got caught up with some of them, but I pale in comparison to Critter, the ultimate social butterfly that he is.

The Metric hall was full of bargains, and had incorporated a tattoo booth, for those who couldn’t wait to get inked. From

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soup to nuts, tires to helmets, it’s a pretty big affair, and the largest meet in Ontario. If you’ve got a stockpile of parts, or are looking for something specific, this is the place to sell or find for next year. There’s also a network within the vendors, of guys who know guys, that have or can find the parts and pieces you’re looking for, and it doesn’t hurt to ask.

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THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 17

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I’m not sure how he fared in the afternoon at that locale, as he was right beside the “How long until it quits?” oil less lawnmower contest. There were more vendors outside than I’d seen in a long time, but then again, this is one of the nicest days for the swap that I’d seen in a long time too. There was no shortage of ideas to ogle outside either, on just about all makes and models, from stock to custom show bikes, baggers to BMWs, even Len’s Automotive had one of his tricked out trikes on display.

All day long bikes came and went, filling the air with the unmistakable rumbles and cracks, filling the vision with sunlit gleaming chrome stars, and filling the soul with some much needed bike therapy, always a great start to what hopefully will be a great season.

B.R.O. Niagara’s Cover the Kids Run 2015 First ride of the year is usually the B.R.O. Cover the Kids Ride the first weekend of May each year. It’s always on a Saturday but can be as early as April 30 , when May 1 is a Sunday, of course that’s the date of the Fort Erie Swap Meet. I rolled in a lot earlier than I realized arriving at about 10:45 am. I was somewhat surprised at the small crowd assembled in the traditional starting spot in Port Dalhousie.

I asked what time the ride was to leave and when Smiley told me 1pm I knew why the crowd seemed so small it was way too early as departure was still about 2 hours away. As it

today with hundreds of motorcycles amassing in the parking lot and pretty much all of them someone that I knew or at least had met before and most knew who I was despite my attempts to maintain a low profile since my retirement, meaning I show up at a lot less events.

This ride is a traditional parade style ride through the Niagara area beginning as mentioned at Port Dalhousie and taking the pack along the lake and into historic Niagara on the Lake where we get lots of gawking tourists, and lots of Asians video tapping our ride as we pass through the middle of the lit-

Bike Night YEA RS turned out I found lots to do in the two hours as many of the objectives I had set out for myself got accomplished during the wait for the ride to leave, the only exception was getting some lunch.

It was great to get out again and meet up with the riders who have made The Mag what it is

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The ride this year was chaperoned through HOODIES T-SHIRTS GOGGLES the Niagara PATCHES STICKERS BIKER PINS Parks area by the Niagara Come in and Visit us or Parks ComShop Online at www.leatherking.ca mission Police Force and the ride stopped at The Butterfly Conservatory instead of the usual spot due to the size of the ride and the available parking area. I zigged and zagged around the cop and his S.U.V. heading for some long overdue lunch.

I had been invited for lunch at the beginning by one of our readers from the Fort Erie area but I was so engaged with

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talking to many friends and readers that I passed on the opportunity and surely regretted it later. I have been on a mission since January to lose a significant amount of weight, 3 digits worth in fact and eating on a schedule is one of the things that really helps me out. I had heard that the ride would be addressed at King George Park by the Mayor of Niagara Falls so instead of stopping at my usual Niagara falls eatery I headed for Tims in Chippawa which was a stone’s throw from the park.

I grabbed a quick sandwich and coffee and headed back to the park, something was definitely going on in the park which I found odd, so I wondered if they ride would meet up with the mayor or not but I waited patiently for them to arrive they rode right past the park and went to the very Tim’s that I had left not 20 minutes earlier.

Once I verified that there was no meeting with the mayor as the park was previously engaged by another charitable group I split off the ride and headed over to my aunts place, she lives right in Chippewa.

After a visit longer than I had planned with my aunt I headed over to the B.R.O. property for the after event food entertainment and all the other great stuff that goes on, not to mention meeting up with more people that I haven’t seen in many years. I wanted to get with Pete; famous for his In The Wind Rides back in the day. He’s holding another this year and I’ts advertised in the mag, unfortunately I am away in Charlotte NC with Senior for the Nascar Races.

Thanks also to Mike for Port Cobourne for the exclusive invite to the private party , it’s on the same weekend as Pete’s ride, again thanks for the invite if I was in town I would have made both events but it’s just not in the cards this year.

One of my goals was to swing by the Eagles Nest and see Jim knowing that his wife and business partner Lorrie has been long suffering with a variety of ailments the most insidious of which is cancer. Jim showed up on the ride and saved me the stop downtown at his shop to get an update.

Nick always tries to make sure that he has whatever I like to drink on hand and when he was pretty sure I was not coming to the property he let Jim get into my Corona.

Well worse things could have happened and I thanked Nick for always thinking of me and said that Jim has my seal of approval and could help drink my beer any time, besides Jim lives nearby and I had to ride to Burlington and with my new weight loss mission I don’t drink that much anymore but I do enjoy a cold one every once in a while.

So the band sounded awesome and I did note the name of the band but apparently it got auto deleted so many apologies to all concerned but needless to say they always have good live tunes at the B.R.O. events, great food, cold drinks, and an outdoor pool table. The event is to support an organization known as C.O.P.E. and provides toys to underprivileged kids in Niagara and it’s been goin on for over 30 years, the only stats I was able to get was the estimate of 250 bikes and 400 people, and based on what I saw that was conservative I figured better than 300 bikes keeping in mind that many who come to this event ride in make a donation and then split after riding through Niagara on the lake.

International Female Ride Day

cle & Sports in Fenwick or as it’s called The Original Clare’s.

We had approximately 30 ladies show up for the ride and we cruised along the beautiful shores of Lake Erie in the sunshine and warmth. The sunshine from Mother Nature and the warmth from the ladies we rode with.

We made a stop at Night’s Chocolates and then came back to Clare’s, some to participate in the Yamaha Demo Rides or some went off the BRO Cover the Kids Ride in Port Dalhousie.

It was busy for all the riders that day. All in all it was a Great Day! Anytime you get a chance, be sure to ride out to Clare’s Cycle in Fenwick and see what’s going on.

You can like their facebook page or sign up for their newsletter to stay informed. www.clarescycle. com

It was a beautiful day. The sky was clear and the sun was shining, spring was here and the delightful sound of Motorcycles was in the air!

Robby Himes & Kim Scott from the Niagara Chrome Diva’s led the International Female Ride Day ride out of Clare’s Cy-

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THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 22

Many of you may remember Bill and Marion, who built, owned, and operated Eagles Landing, in Teviotdale for many years. They also supported the Riders Mag as advertisers, and organized many charity runs and events. In all the decades I’ve known Marion, I don’t think we’ve ever gone riding together . . . until now. Marion was also interested in attending the IFRD ride in Elora so we met up partway and she led me down the scenic route. What a fun ride, twisty turns and roller coaster hills! Marion managed to dodge the farm equipment and baby buggy incidents easily, just another ride! We arrived with lots of time at hand to relax, take pictures, and catch up.

There were a few old Hamilton friends there to surprise me. Sue and her sippy cup wasn’t really a surprise, but was certainly entertaining! I ran into another familiar face, Sharon who was last month’s cover

girl for the Riders Mag. Jackie was who I thought she was, another great gal from the Hammer.

Jackie and Jennifer along with help from friends and family organized the ride and they absolutely deserve honorable mention.

Sometimes we forget how difficult it is to organize a ride of any size much less 113 motorcyclists who don’t all know one another. For this event, Jackie and Jennifer found a parking lot big enough to hold all those bikes easily and accommodate a Disc Jockey, oh yeah, we had tunes. The Elora Community Center was a great choice with a trail and the gorge right off the parking lot, plenty of space, close to downtown, and bathrooms and vending machines on site! The parking wars were narrowly avoided as Jackie “secured” the parking lot with her “written permission” in spite of threats from the “opposition”. Don’t mess with Jackie, she’s been involved in organizing many events over the years and has taken great care to cross the t’s and dot the i’s. The guy just didn’t stand a chance!

The girls also found a scenic paved route with a great choice of roads less travelled. Blockers were organized and did a fantastic job of keeping 113 bikes moving, think I got into 5th a few times!

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These two gals, Jackie and Jennifer, also came up with enough prizes for darn near everyone, and avoided drama all day long, did I mention it was all women?

It was a wonderful day from weather straight through to the sunset on the way home! Can’t wait to see everyone again soon at the sold out Hillbilly Rodeo!!!

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Fighting for Your Rights It’s a strange and unbalancing sensation to be simultaneously - in awe and humbled every day. Oh yea, I was forewarned by my Vice Chair and Bro Larry Pooler, but nothin’ could have prepared me for the overwhelming emotion that filled the cavernous space of the Denver Marriott Tech Center. The fervor encompassed every corner of this massive hotel. Over 1000 attendees from all over the USA began arriving on the Thursday and it is now Sunday and there still are over 300 participants waiting to get home. A massive snow storm hit the area late Saturday, which clogged the streets and caused several outgoing flights to be cancelled. Many attendees rode their bikes and were trapped; but now the sun has broken through and the pavement is just wet and drying fast in the welcome sunshine. As I sit here peckin’ away, I hear the rumble of their machines idling. An unmistakable herald that they will be rollin’ shortly.

The threat of bad weather did not dampen the tremendous sense of brotherhood that rippled throughout the weekend. There were no strangers here. Merely family members not yet encountered. A sea of patches filled the halls, elevators, restaurant, coffee shop, washrooms, all available seating was occupied - wherever it was located, and it was SRO in the outside smokin’ areas. Bikes lined the driveway under the massive front entrance canopy. The hotel had closed the huge rear parking lot to automobile parking and it was filled to capacity with motorcycles.

This was the 30th anniversary of the National Coalition of Motorcyclists – a milestone of epic proportions that is testament to the US biker world’s commitment to protect the rights and freedoms of bikers. Clubs of every denomination are represented here.

The roster featured religious clubs, military clubs, veteran clubs, riding clubs, touring associations and many 1% clubs such as; Bandidos MC, Outlaws MC, Mongols MC, Warlocks MC, Hells Angels MC, Devils Disciples MC, Companeros MC, Sons of Silence MC, Outsiders MC, Pagans MC, Vagos MC, plus members of many individual support clubs. Everyone, absolutely everyone, respected each other’s reason for attending and, to my knowledge; there was

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not one incident or altercation . . . not even a stare-down.

The weekend was a whirlwind of seminars and meetings that closed following an epic banquet that honored the many volunteers who made a difference since the 2014 Silver Spoke Awards were given at NCO Dallas. Need to slow here ‘cuz, due to my impatience, I’m jumpin’ ahead of the story. Jus wanna get back to the party, Eh Ollie?

To save the OCC $$$, I elected to attend single-low. Not havin’ a patch made little difference as there are no strangers here. As you may be aware, I’m not an introverted soul so I boldly introduced myself to anyone who made eye-contact. Of course, the little Canadian flag pin on my Snap-On ball cap seemed to break the ice. I quickly made contact with several officers in the CoC family. There is also another important biker’s rights group associated with NCOM and the CoC aptly named US Defenders. This group of Freedom Fighters is responsible for travelling around the US and speaking about biker’s rights and the mechanics of campaigning to make change. These men are unbelievable! Every year, they log many miles educating the masses about lobbying the various state & federal politicians. They have made huge strides in enacting antiprofiling legislation in many states and are determined to achieve the same throughout the US in 2015. Thank you, Paul, Jason, Gimmi Jimmy, and Double D for your fire, determination, and untiring dedication.

Friday night was the BIG Confederation of Clubs General Patch Holders Meeting. Earlier in the day, I had the pleasure of meeting Richard Lester, NCOM Founder and Big Boar, the very large and very capable liaison between the CoC Board of Directors and the many CoC’s spread throughout the USA. Now many years have passed since Larry Pooler attended the convention sooooo, they were very surprised that I was there and also that the Ontario Confederation of Clubs was alive and functioning as a vital biker’s rights entity. At that point, I was offered a seat at the head table along with about 60 plus other CoC officers. I was seated behind a name plaque designating that an officer of the Ontario Confederation of Clubs was in attendance.

Richard Lester personally requested me to speak about the problems that are unique to Ontario. This was quite an honor which I embraced gladly and without hesitation. The many other reports given were simultaneously informing and touching as the stories were filled with discrimination and bias towards bikers. The really big stink is the campaign by the US Attorney’s office to dissolve the trademark held by the Mongols M.C. which is scheduled for trial shortly.

The Devils Disciples M.C. has already lost their trademark but is appealing the verdict.

This is a new tactic whereby LE conducts a civil action under the R.I.C.C.O statute. The end game is to remove the 1% patches from the clubs once they lose their tradetimleighbell@bellnet.ca mark protection. There is a

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huge lobby working to provide legal assistance to those clubs under attack. These are all my peeps as you are my peeps, and the injustice of it has filled me with determination to make a difference for the bikers of Ontario.

Back to the Saturday banquet – what an unbelievable evening!

Many awards were given out but the most memorable was given to Danny “The Count” Koker of the History Channel show Counting Cars. The award was to recognize the many contributions he has made to benefit USA Veterans – both on the show and off. A special award was given to Joe Terisi of Easy Rider Magazine for the unrelenting work his magazine has done to assist in the fight for biker’s rights.

I enjoyed the festivities in the company of my new-found Bro’s of the In Country Vietnam M.C. Thanx to Trash, Gunslinger and Tinker for adopting me and making me very welcome. I also enjoyed the festivities alongside Pastor Ron Baptiste of the Covenant Confirmers Ministries. This is an amazing biker whose church is located in Nashville. He owns two Harleys and preaches his service from a pulpit that resembles the front end of a pimped chopper. He also has both of his bikes up on the stage while conducting an old-time revival service, complete with strobe lights and gospel singers.

Thanx for the invite, Pastor. I’ll put it on my bucket list! Later that night, I enjoyed a couple of pops with The Count and his bud. It was a most pleasurable and soul-satisfyin’ evening. This is one for the memoirs, Eh Ollie?

It’s Sunday and there are still a few bikers in the hotel. I’m outta here tomorrow mornin’ at 05:00 hrs to catch my flight to the smoke. HEADS UP . . . Don’t be a sheep and keep grazin’ while the lightnin’ rages all around! The problems reported here are comin’ to a theater near you very, very soon. We need to get organized before every biker (not just clubbers) is subjected to a scrutiny reminiscent of the discrimination of the Jews by Nazi Germany.

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On The

Here we are zinging into the summer at about a mile a minute, we headed off to do our annual trip to the southwestern Ontario area and shockingly a long time contributing writer, friend and supporter of the mag Ken MacDonald passed away unexpectedly. It was a complete shock, I had Ken on my feature list for quite a while and we rescheduled last year’s planned shoot as his bike was not together. I know he was working hard to get it together for the Friday afternoon shoot and when I got a text Thursday morning that he had passed away during the night at the young age of 46 I was in shock to say the least.

Ken was a hard working guy who held a variety of jobs over the years I knew him ranging from truck driver to carpenter, he was a driving force behind the O.C.C. and belonged to a variety of riding clubs over that time. He was totally committed to his wife Kathy and his kids Cameron and Conrad and they were seen together often at events throughout the Niagara region despite living out near Sarnia, he also started a swap meet in that area years ago. Ken with be missed by all who knew him, G.B.N.F. The truck was late that morning delivering the May Mags so I was scrambling to line up some others for our planned feature shoot trip as with so many moving parts in our world you cannot stop the ball once it gets rolling what with arranging the nanny to sit with the kids for the weekend and a driver to drive the youngest to school and a wide range of commitments with the elder members of my family it’s just not possible to pivot when you really should.

I was able to get a couple others on board for our feature shoot trip and we will be making a trip out that way to do the

Road

with J.R.

planned shoot with Ken’s bike when we can find a time that is suitable for all involved later this summer, as it stands now our schedule is pretty intense through to the end of June at this point.

We will be making an effort to try to get some local shoots done as we are still a little behind on our shoots as a trip into Niagara ended up cancelled by one of the feature applicants. The people who just got onto the list sometimes do not understand just how challenging it is to try to time this stuff up with our children, elder parents doctor visits along with all our other responsibilities but I will say that all who are on our list are always welcome to contact us by email or phone and ride over to Burlington where we are located we can usually do a weekday between about 11am and 2pm with a short amount of notice.

This month’s feature is a sportster and I do have at least one more on my list but we do feature the famous sporty in both January and June each year so a few more on my list would not be a bad thing and we are always on the hunt for more vintage bikes, it seems that they break down the most and are often in pieces when we are preparing a feature shoot trip, so if you have a bike to feature send me an email with a picture please especially if its vintage or a sportster.

Ok on a final note while I was on the B.R.O. Cover the Kids Ride an old friend and acquaintance from The Mag came up to me to deliver some more sad news, that his wife Judy had passed away back in February. Although she never mentioned it beyond running a poker run to raise money for C.F. I was not aware that she too was afflicted with the disease, I had always assumed that it was a child or family member but she worked hard, and sadly Mark says that after being told that she was going to be fine she passed away, it’s typical of our health care system, it ain’t free, and it ain’t good.

God Bless and see you out there, “on the road”

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1111 DAVIS DRIVE, SUITE 501, UNIT 23 NEWMARKET, ON. L3Y 9E5 THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 26

Joke

A little boy was waiting for his mother to come out of the grocery store.

As he waited, he was approached by a man who asked, “Son, can you tell me where the Post Office is?”

The little boy replied, “Sure! Just go straight down this street a couple a blocks and turn to your right.”

The man thanked the boy kindly and said, “I’m the new pastor in town. I’d like for you to come to church on Sunday. I’ll show you how to get to Heaven.”

The little boy replied with a chuckle.

“You’re bullshitting me, right? You don’t even know the way to the Post Office” There was a brothel at the top of a hill, with a large red light at the bottom of the hill.

There were four men: One was walking briskly up the hill; One was inside the brothel; One was walking slowly down the hill and the fourth man was sitting in his car at the bottom of the hill.

What were the nationalities of the four men?

The man going up the hill: Rushin The man in the brothel: Him-a-layin The man walking down the hill: Finish And the man in the car at the bottom: Newfie , waiting for the light to turn green The teacher said, “Let’s begin by reviewing some History.

Who said: ‘Give me Liberty, or give me Death’?”

She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Little Akio, a bright foreign exchange student from Japan, who had his hand up: “Patrick Henry, 1775,” he said.

“Very good!

Who said: ‘Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth’?”

Again, no response except from Little Akio: “Abraham Lincoln, 1863.”

“Excellent!” said the teacher continuing.

“Let’s try one a bit more difficult.

Who said, ‘Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country’?”

Once again, Akio’s was the only hand in the air and he said: “John F. Kennedy, 1961.”

The teacher snapped at the class, “Class, you should be ashamed of yourselves. Little Akio isn’t from this country and he knows more about our history than you do.”

She heard a loud whisper: “Fuck the Japs.”

“Who said that? I want to know right now !” she angrily demanded.

Little Akio put his hand up, “General MacArthur, 1945.”

At that point, a student in the back said, “I’m gonna puke.”

The teacher glares around and asks, “All right! Now who said that ?”

Again, Little Akio says, “George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.”

Now furious, another student yells, “Oh yeah? Suck this!”

Little Akio jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, “Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!”

Now with almost mob hysteria someone said, “You

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little shit! If you say anything else, I’ll kill you!”

Little Akio frantically yells at the top of his voice, “Michael Jackson to the children testifying against him, 2004.”

The teacher fainted.

As the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, “Oh shit, we’re screwed!”

Little Akio said quietly, “Albertans; if Justin Trudeau gets elected PM”.

Three men - a Canadian farmer, a Muslim fanatic and a White Trash Biker are all walking together one day.

They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.

‘I will give each of you one wish, which is three wishes in total’, says the Genie.

The Canadian says, ‘I am a farmer and my son will also farm.

I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada.’

POOF! With the blink of the Genie’s eye, the land in Canada was forever fertile for farming.

The Muslim was amazed, so he said, ‘I want a wall around Afghanistan, Palestine, Iraq and Iran so that no infidels, Americans or Canadians can come into our precious land.’

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 27

POOF! Again, with the blink of the Genie’s eye, there was a huge wall around those countries.

The Biker says, ‘I am very curious.

Please tell me more about this wall.’

The Genie explains, ‘Well, it’s about 5,000 feet high, 500 feet thick and completely surrounds the countries. Nothing can get in or out: it’s virtually impenetrable.’

The Biker sits down on his Harley, cracks a beer, lights a cigar, smiles and says, ‘Fill them with water.’

Dump the Male flight attendants. No one wanted them in The first place....

Replace all the Female flight attendants with good-looking Strippers!

What the hell -- they don’t even serve food anymore, so what’s the Loss?

The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a ‘party atmosphere’ going in the cabin. And, of course, every Businessman in this country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women.

Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn’t need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and ‘special services.’

Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues.

This is definitely a win-win situation if we handle it right – a Golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.

Why didn’t Bush or Obama think of this?

Why do I still have to do everything myself?

Sincerely, Rob Ford Toronto Mayor The Blond Girl Wins One. A blonde city girl named Amy marries a Colorado rancher.

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 28

One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to Amy, “The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows, so I drove a nail into the 2x4 just above where the cow’s stall is in the barn. Please show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?” The rancher leaves for the fields. After a while, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door.

“I came to inseminate the cow,” he said.

Amy takes him down to the barn. They walk along the row of cows, and when Amy sees the nail, she tells him, “This is the one right here.”

The man, assuming he is dealing with an airhead blonde, asks, “Tell me, lady, ‘cause I’m dying to know. How would YOU know that this is the right cow to be bred?”

“That’s simple,” she said. “By the nail that’s over its stall,” she explains very confidently.

Laughing rudely at her, the man says, “And what, pray tell, is the nail for?”

The blonde turns to walk away and says sweetly over her shoulder, “I guess it’s to hang your pants on.”

OK, so this guy returned home from work one night, right?

It was late. He headed straight for the bedroom and made passionate love to his wife. Afterwards, he went straight to the kitchen to fetch himself a cold drink only to find his wife there looking for something in the fridge.

Surprised to see her there, he asked her how she made it to the kitchen so quickly when they’ve only just finished making all that hectic love in the bedroom.

His wife screamed: “Oh My God! That was my mother in the bedroom, she was so tired when she arrived so I let her sleep in our room.

Alarmed, she ran to her mother and asked: “Buh Mammy, why yuh didn’t say something when Harry was making love tuh yuh?”

Mammy replied: “Girl...Yuh know me and yuh husband don’t talk.”

A guy texts his neighbour: “Bob, I’m sorry. I’ve been riddled

with guilt and I have to confess:I have been helping myself to your wife when you’re not around, probably more than you.

I know it’s no excuse but I don’t get it at home. I can’t live with the guilt any longer. I hope you’ll accept my sincerest apology. It won’t happen again.”

The man, feeling outrage and betrayed, grabs his gun, goes into the bedroom and without a word shoots his wife.

Moments later the guy gets a second text: “I really should use spell check! That should be “WIFI”...Sorry!”

The Prime Minister and Premier Wynne are on the balcony of the Legislature in front of a huge crowd. The P.M. leans towards Premier Wynne and says, “Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, but will go deep into their hearts and they’ll forever speak of this day and rejoice!”

Wynn replies, I seriously doubt that! With one little wave of your hand .... Show me!”

So the P.M. backhands her and knocks her off the balcony!

AND THE CROWD ROARS & CHEERS WILDLY and there was happiness throughout Ontario!

Kind of brings a tear to your eye, doesn’t it?

At a bar last night; I met this really pretty girl wearing a sweater with a big maple leaf on the front.

I walked up to her and said ‘Hi, my name is Three Goal Lead.’

I was thinking someone wearing a Maple Leaf sweater would surely blow a three goal lead.

Man said to his wife “Alright you sexy thing, upstairs now” She looked at him and said “Ooh, you devil” He said “No, seriously, hockey is starting,....... bugger off ” An elderly lady was invited to an old friend’s home for dinner one evening.

She was impressed by the way her lady friend preceded every request to her husband with endearing terms such as: Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc.

The couple had been married almost 70 years and, clearly, they were still very much in love.

While the husband was in the living room, her lady friend leaned over to her hostess to say, “I think it’s wonderful that, after all these years, you still call your husband all those loving names.”

The elderly lady hung her head. “I have to tell you the truth,” she said, “his name slipped my mind about 10 years ago, and I’m scared to death to ask the cranky old asshole what his name is.”

It was entertainment night at the Senior Citizens’ Centre. After the community sing-along led by Alice at the piano, it was time for the star of the show - Claude the Hypnotist!

Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance. “Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time,” said Claude.

The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew, from his waistcoat pocket, a beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain.

“I want you to keep your eyes on this watch” said Claude, holding the watch high for all to see.

“It’s a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for six generations,” said Claude.

He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, “Watch the watch --- Watch the watch ---Watch the watch” The audience became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth. The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming surfaces. A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently swaying watch.

They were hypnotized.

And then, suddenly, the chain broke!!! The beautiful watch fell to the stage and burst apart on impact.

“SHIT,” said Claude.

It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizens’ Centre and Claude was never invited there again.

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Continued on Page 57

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 29

SHOP/BUILDER OF THE MONTH

It is difficult to describe or define my Trike My Bike experience as whatever terms or words that I use would fall far short of the mark as it is such a multifaceted operation and there is just so much going on that it was extremely difficult for me to focus on any one thing without being drawn to something else entirely. Calling it an experience is indeed, accurate and it was a fun experience due to owner Lenn Curtis’ seemingly boundless energy, limitless imagination and desire to make it that way.

I went there to do a simple Calendar feature on Trike my Bike and ended up taking the Magical mystery tour of a fantastic business and facility that is ever expanding, ever changing and getting an education on how to do this (although what is here can’t really be duplicated.) and meeting some totally awesome people to boot!

Having never been there before, I had no idea of what of to expect other than it was a shop that did Trike conversions on motorcycles and they wanted in for the Calendar Feature.

What I discovered was a place that is almost as fascinating as owners Lenn, the love of his life and inspiration, Christine and Christine’s amazing daughter/model Sarah.

Lenn always seemed to be a great guy when I spoke to him on the phone, but I was totally impressed after finally meeting him in person.

It all seemed to stem from a severe motorcycle accident that, then, farm boy, Lenn had when he was 17 years old, that involved not only crashing his motorcycle due to an enormous pothole, not only just crashing from which he sustained all the nasty shit you can imagine that would be involved with that but then getting run over at high speed by a car which left him with many more extreme injuries that make me squirm just hearing about them, and was hospitalized and facing a long road to recovery. I know many lesser folks who would be drowning themselves in self-pity and settling on the meager disability

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 30

pension that the Government was willing to dole out and spending the rest of their lives moaning and groaning about the cruddy cards that fate had dealt them.

Not Lenn. He picked himself up, then refused the Governments hand out and while recovering from his injuries, let his natural drive, intelligence, and insatiable appetite for new experiences and knowledge provide the drive to go from disabled accident victim, to successful farmer then on to starting a computer company that you may have heard of called Xplornet, as well as many other offshoot businesses’ and then on to build what can best be described as the very distinctive “The Fun Plaza” on Walker Rd. in Windsor that is now home to, among other things; Trike My Bike. He’s still far from finished as he has many plans for expansion and I’m sure, some that he hasn’t even thought of yet. For Lenn, plans are just the general idea, not to be confused with the official finished product.

He and Christine are not just very savvy business people but are true humanitarians in every sense of the word and beyond. They are more than willing to help those in need and are an asset to the community as a whole with no strings attached.

Lenn had an interest in Segway for a time and tried unsuccessfully to get a dealership for the unique vehicles and instead launched his motorcycle business four years ago.

When people started coming in asking him to “Trike their bike” he decided to not only take the name but live up to the title and the responsibilities that that entailed.

He hired top notch, factory trained Harley mechanic Alex better known as “Huggy”, who has a “Don’t rush” attitude and is more concerned with doing it right the first time than just getting it out the door. After have a couple of hundred conversions in their short time in the business and they have

an extensive list of satisfied customers that will attest to the quality of the workmanship, the components and the honesty and commitment that they experienced.

They know all the rules and regulations and all the ramifications, complications and situations surrounding these conversions and have helped out several riders over the years who have bought conversions in the United States thinking that that they were getting a bargain only to find themselves in Dutch with Transport Canada, despite seemingly jumping through all the proper hoops with the taxes and duties being paid, yet the trikes can be seized and can end up far more than they thought they were saving to overcome their predicament.

Right now, the disparity between the Canadian Loonie and the American Greenback is adding to the costs of doing the conversions as the parts coming from the States simply cost more! But the trend towards trikes and the demand for them remains strong and is keeping them busy.

They are also the Canadian rep for Hannigan Trikes but Trike my Bike is more than just Trikes….far more! They will work on every type of motorcycle, dirt bikes, ATV’s, and any make or model that comes through the doors, including Zero. That, in addition to being Daymark of Windsor. They do sales and service on a full line of E Bikes and mobility scooters and have even serviced Peg Strollers as no one in town did.

They have installed a charging station on the outside of the building that allows electric vehicles to charge their rides for free, as part of an ever expanding network of such stations that will eventually enable these vehicles to travel across the Country for free. Lenn is also an Amsoil dealer and offers the lowest prices around for Harley oil and other products.

Then you get into the fun stuff like the R/C Helicopters, planes, cars and boats and the Airsoft guns and accessories before you spot the really fun stuff like drones complete with cameras and R/C race cars some of which

can hit 105 MPH. That is not scale speed but actual speed and people race them competitively that are contained in the building right next door!

In fact Lenn now has regular has drag races in the driveway, out back for these miniature titans of speed to compete with each other now and an enormous race track that will accommodate these pint sized speed demons is in the planning stages and I have no doubt that it will bring even more attention to the “Fun Plaza on Walker Rd.” I will be forced to come back and check it out!

This is indeed, a fantastic spot for young and old and everything in between. If you live in the area you probably already know of this amazing place and the equally amazing people that run it. If you have never been here and are in the area, by all means, do yourselves a favour, drop by and say hello. You will at the very least meet some truly amazing people and will have seen first-hand that good people with no alternative motives do exist in this World.

It was an eye opening, awe inspiring, and a tremendously uplifting experience for me, and well worth the drive to Windsor!

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 31

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Conparing the little things -

Comparing the Little Things: Victory Magnum with a Harley

The Floorboard The Magnum is superior in many ways but will I like it better than a Harley? I will need a season on it for a definitive answer.

Maybe not; a long trip with the boys with 500 miles of riding a day will sort this out.

Testing Both Bikes I need to compare the Magnum with a brand new Harley. I am riding 8500 kilometers across Europe and back in June on a new FLT Road Glide. I am riding with the boys from Bergen, Norway over to Denmark, then down through Germany into Czech Republic, Slovakia, Serbia, Macedonia to our BIG PARTY in Greece. Then we will ride back through different countries to Norway.

Braking I will experience all aspects including panic stops with the ABS brakes. The Harley I rode through Russia awhile ago was also new with ABS brakes. It saved my ass a few times. However, if I was off balance a little, I had a bit of a time holding it up after the sudden braking.

Last week I was blasting through traffic on the Magnum.

Suddenly, a car swerved across my path. The driver froze. All he could see was a big bike headed into him at speed. He was freaked. I had nowhere to go! If on my 2007 Street Glide, I would be toast. The wheels would have locked and the bike would do a high speed slide into the side of the car.

I hammered the brakes on the Magnum. The bike stopped fast, real fast with about five feet to spare. I did not hit. It was stable. There were no balance issues. It did not slide. Excellent tires assist in this. I will see how the FLT compares.

Who knows, maybe I will like the FLT better. If so, I will tell you, giving the reasons why.

The Details are what is Turning Me On There are details that blow me away. They are not expensive innovations. Every time I notice a new improved simplicity, my irritation with H-D increases. Why didn’t H-D do this for me thirty or forty years ago. I, like many have gone blindly forth with

my unwavering faith and devotion to Harley but this is changing.

The Lowly Floorboard Lets look at the lowly rider floorboard that few give a second thought.

The Magnum has Ness floorboards, sometimes referred to as banana boards. I never liked the styling on a custom bike. As a consequence I never tried riding a bike with extended boards. This was a mistake. I was not thinking if these boards are better or not, I was just concerned about the look. Don can be very shallow.

The first time I sat on a Magnum at a bike show six short months ago. I found myself shifting my feet back and forth on the floorboards. An epiphany burst forth.

What the fuck? These floorboards allow many foot positions.

This is not a cure for rider’s ass but it is as close as one can be. This is the main reason I need a long ride on the Magnum. Why?... to find out how much further I can ride before my ass begins aching. Then, I will need to see how much shifting my feet around will alleviate the soreness. I am getting irritated again. I have ridden tens of thousands of miles with a painful rear end because I did not have a choice of seating positions. If the Magnum soothes the aching butt, my stubborn loyalty to HarleyDavidson will suffer some more.

A sore ass tip is to use a hard seat as opposed to a soft one. The Magnum has a hard, comfortable seat. Victory already incorporates sloping sides on the seat to increase leg room to the ground. This is an old customizing and lowering trick. The Magnum has many of these “tricks” because customizers designed it (Arlen and Zack Ness).

After riding the Magnum for a bit, it dawned on me that the floorboards were not flat like on a Harley. They angle up slightly. A small detail that will add to comfort.

The Magnum floorboards are not rubber mounted.

The bike does not need rubber absorbing vibration.

I picked up my Magnum a few weeks ago. I sat on it.

It is a little different from my Street Glide. The mechanic asked what was bothering me. I said nothing; I just had to adjust. Forty six years on a Harley does not leave you.

He commented that I should try different foot control locations to increase my comfort level.

Huh! He looked at my perplexed expression. The aftermarket sells expensive kits for extending or shortening the rider foot controls for H-D. The Magnum incorporates these into their controls.

H-D builds a bike for the average rider. The problem is that H-D riders are skinny or fat; tall or short; long arms and legs or stubby ones. I am one of those that have short legs relative to the sizing of most Bagger touring bikes.

I now ask the rhetorical question. Why are not adjustable controls incorporated on HarleyDavidson to accommodate the 99% of us that are not average? Like, why is a Harley built the same for a 6’ 6’’ long-legged oversized man as it is for a petit 100 pound, 5’ zero female?

Back to the floorboards; their length and shape accommodate the short and tall rider

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THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 34

by Donny The Floorboard Petersen

from the get-go. Stock H-D boards may be cramped too close for a tall person and awkwardly forward for the short one.

The mechanic hands me a solitary Allen key wrench and explains the foot control adjustment procedure in 20 seconds flat.

I lift one floorboard to angle it up so I can have a looksee. The board returns to its riding position when I let go. An H-D board will angle up and stay there. It must be manually returned to the down riding position. I lift again to look. There is a dual return spring that works silently and efficiently. Cool, I thought. No more will a raised floorboard interfere with my foot control. I have almost had more than one accident because I couldn’t brake properly in a panic situation because the board was in an unfamiliar position or lodged in the pedal’s way on older Harleys. No more.

Then, I noticed a sturdy metal appendage sticking down.

The mechanic saw my questioning look and told me it was a scraper for when leaning the bike way over in a turn to protect the custom looking board. A simple thing that would cost H-D nothing to incorporate but then I guess their floorboard sales would drop.

All I was trying to do is look under the board for the rider control adjustment and already I have seen a couple of nifty things that will improve my riding experience. The whole bike is like this. Simple little things that I have never had on any of my hundreds of Harleys that make life a little easier or save me some money for replacing worn parts.

I lay on the ground and undo an Allen bolt for the brake control. The initial stiffness coming out tells me there is Loctite on it. I like this. H-D, in most cases does this also.

It prevents bolts and other fasteners from coming loose.

However, this Loctite feels a little stiffer, which is good.

The Allen bolt comes out. There is a slider mechanism. I slide it back for my leg length. I reinstall the Allen bolt. The brake line will allow adjustment forward or back.

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also, faster than you might think.

I move the control back and thread the 10mm bolt back in with the shifter rod spline roughly adjusted for the foot lever height. Moving the controls will move the foot lever up-or-down. If moving the control closer for shorter leg comfort, it will move up. Conversely, it will move down for long legs. Then, thread the Allen bolt back in and tighten to lock the control into position.

Now, I got to fine tune the height of the shifter arm for my foot thickness. I am wearing running shoes so I grab my left riding boot and place it on the floorboard with the toe under the shift peg. If I adjust it to my running shoe, the boot will not fit under comfortably.

The peg is too high, even for the boot. Now, adjust the shift rod by turning it in-or-out for a personal custom fit.

I take the bike for a test ride. It is amazing how much of a change one inch can make. I am happy.

Scraper Return Spring Allen Key And yes, I know I didn’t re-Loctite the bolts. I was excited to feel Adjustment Bolt the change.

I take the Allen bolt out from underneath the floorboard I promise myself, I on the shifter side. There is a 10mm bolt holding the shift rod will go back and do onto its splined appendage on this American made Victory it. Will I? I may pay assembled in Iowa. Oh, its metric and not an American the price on the standard bolt! Relax, your new American made Harley is side of the road at mostly metric also. The rest of the world uses metric. The some future date USA is the last major holdout but the Americans are changing with an inoperable control if I don’t.

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THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 35

Outspoken Cycles Grand Opening

While we all know these names in the business, Davies Harley Davidson, Mackies Harley Davidson, GP Bikes and Fred Hales, just to mention a few, it’s always nice to see the smaller towns opening shops. Not only does it give us riders an alternative, it gives us an enjoyable ride off the beaten track.

First off, we would like to thank Mother Nature herself for playing exceptionally well for the event; a sunny, warm Saturday is always welcomed! With that being said, attendance was a great success on May 2, 2015 for the grand opening of OutSpoken Custom Cycles in Uxbridge, Ontario. Even though

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 36

by The

Mag Hag

the weather was spectacular, owner Brian MacLean along with Olga Leyenson really brightened up the day. The both of them walked around greeting everyone with great big smiles and welcomed all with open arms.

Other participants such as Big Brothers, Big Sisters St.Catharines - Thorold & District, Hydrografica, SOUTH HILL Designs by Nikitas Jewelry Box Independent Artist #560284, and many others played a great roll in keeping all attednees busy and the event very active and lively.

It was great to see all of Brian and Olga’s family and friends volunteering and enjoying the day! They all sported their orange OutSpoken Custom Cycles t-Shirts, making it easy to

y r a s r e v i n n A 5th

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track them down for raffle tickets and CAMPING & LODGING answer any questions. Gotta love them volunteers, who knows what we would PEOPLE’S CHOICE SHOW & SHINE do without them.

As with all small town community events, Mayor Gerri Lynn O’Connor joined by Ward 4 Councillor,Fred Bryan, stopped by to congratulate the OutSpoken team and spent some time speaking with guests and participants; this was a greatly appreciated gesture.

With the riding season upon us and the calendar exploding with events, The Critter Crew will be here, there and everywhere! Although Critter himself For More Information or Vendor Space had a day full of appearances to make, Sponsored by: he stopped by to check out the newest shop opening. Big Scott and I were honored to be able to attend the event on behalf of The Rider’s Mag and we look forward to covering more events.

So should you find yourself off that facebook.com/bikefest.bobcaygeon beaten track and looking for someone to do some work on your bike, looking to order parts, or even thinking of buying a new ride, Frank’s Magic Crops, Inc. stop by OutSpoken Custom CyOwner Frank Pastor Jr. cles in Uxbridge, Horticulturalist Class III U of T you and your bike Over 35 Yrs. Experience will be in good hands.

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THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 37

Whispers of a Neoteric Nomad

Well the heat has been turned up and the spring clean up has begun for some people but for others the clean-up is done and some of us have been patiently waiting and waiting for our parts to finish our winter projects. Have you ever noticed how much the generations have changed the people? I have always been under the impression that a man’s word sealed with a handshake is a nonbreakable bond and that should issues arise and they do at times, a courtesy message is acceptable to notify the other party of the changes or delays. Although, not always favorable but at times its beyond anyone’s control. To me that’s called respect! Nowadays, people run away and don’t seem to care if they keep their word or not. I’m starting to find out that some talk the talk but don’t seem to walk the walk....

I always get a kick of frustration when these so called “professional people” turn out to be less than what you expected. I get upset when someone takes over three weeks just to spray a set of lowers for my Glide to which I supplied the tri-coat paint and had sanded down to proper specs, then they turnout out so bad and sparkly that not even the fairest of fairies would even come close to them. It makes a

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 38

by That Northern Guy

person wonder what went wrong. Needless to say that my next stop was to get 1000 grit sand paper to get a rid of that unacceptable, sparkly piece of shit work. I’m no paint expert but if you are to match a bike part to the rest of the bike and being that it is a tri-color paint, shouldn’t one do a test strip or at least look at the rest of the bike???

We are lucky to have some of the best bikers here in Sudbury as between the rough roads which everybody in Ontario is experiencing thanks for our “not so” Premiere Whynne but the bikers in Sudbury have to put up not only with rough roads but constant discrimination and harassment, as well as challenging lifestyle that if only for a minute all these people would stop and try and see that it’s the best lifestyle to have.

I recently found out that it’s not only bikers in Sudbury who are going through this kind of harassment but some bar owners that cater to bikers are constantly threatened to have their liquor license removed at the first sign of being associated with bikers to the point I had one of my distribution points, a local watering hole for the past 50+ years having to hide the Rider’s Mags due to the harassment of this so called liquor inspector.

Apparently some were told to post signs prohibiting “colors” or patches if they want to keep their liquor licence.

Why does it matter what’s on your back? We’re all flesh and bones and we treat everyone with respect! I think this calls for a visit to this individual for a chat to set the record straight and explain that we are not less of people than they are, but better ones and maybe that’s why they’re intimidated by us.

Discrimination and harassment will not and should not be tolerated!

OK that being said, now time for some positive notes...

Along with the familiar faces I see on rides throughout the city and beyond, there’s a lot of good people here in the north that are biker friendly and have no problem in showing it.

Take my buddies Ben and Roger from Leatherworks Plus, along with their entire staff are some of the most genuine friendly people that will cater to your every need as far as leather and such products are concerned. “Because Leather Works on You” Just down the road,

you’ll find Bobbio at his establishment called the Frood Hotel that will offer you a cold one and/or a bite to eat in his newly renovated restaurant or chip stand soon to be open.

We can’t forget the parts guys at the local Harley shop that will bend over backwards along with top dog Greg, the new owner/ operator of The Rock Harley

Davidson dealership that has changed the face of Harley in Northern Ontario. “Come Experience the Difference”.

Another excellent group of people are Mr and Mrs Bimm just around the corner at the Kawasaki/Honda dealership called Northstar Recreation.

They have grown this business and their clientele to the champion business that it is today.

As further issues get printed, I will host other people from Northern Ontario, in no particular order that help build

the biking community what it is today. After all, The Rider’s Mag is “All About the People”.

As far as an update for Northern Ontario rides and events, there are several already planned and in the books to be carried out.

On June 20th 2015, the Rally for Dad, throughout the past several years I’ve met some great and interesting people on this ride. I’m so glad that the Rider’s Mag will be part of that ride starting this year and hopefully next year I’ll get my invitation early enough so they would be able to advertise with us. More information and registration can be accessed online at www.ncrfsudbury.com under signature events.

A new venue for the Sudbury area on Saturday, June 27th 2015, has appeared, as the first annual Swap Meet hosted by our local Bacchus M/C at 1010 Lorne Street in Sudbury.

(Beside the Tim Horton’s that everyone knows.) The event starts at 10:00 AM until 6:00 PM and proceeds go to help support the Elgin Street Mission. Vendor tables are only $20.00 each and can be reserved by email at sbmcsm@ gmail.com . Again, Saturday, June 27th 10 AM to 6 PM. Be there!

Ride Manitoulin

One of the Northern Ontario’s biggest events this year will be happening on July 17th, 18th & 19th and it will be happening in one of the most beautiful areas of Northern Ontario, more precisely Providence Bay on Manitoulin Island. Whether you take the Chi-Cheemaun ferry or highway 400 to highway 17 to come north, the breathtaking scenery will leave you in awe and wanting more. Make sure to save the date and drop by this fantastic event. We will be there covering all the activities planned which promises to be a great weekend for everyone. Drop in and say hi!

Stay tuned to this column in the next few months as I will have tons of pictures as well as reporting on several Northern Ontario events that are scheduled to happen as we ramp up our riding season. Although most people have been out and about already on their scoots, the main events seem to happen only from mid-June to early September only. I know there are several others, by invitation only events, that are happening as the Northern Ontario biking community is alive and well up here and it’s only a matter of time before it grows even more. We are presently working with local businesses to bring new and existing major events to the area. One of a kind for Sudbury that will include North Bay, Timmins, and Sault Ste Marie and beyond. Stay tuned to this column in the upcoming months to find out more.

As mentioned in a previous article, we are looking to be putting on a North Ontario launch party most likely to be held towards the end of July so that all friends & family, Northern, Eastern and from Southern Ontario can plan to come out to party with the Rider’s Mag and celebrate with the many fans we have here as that’s what the Rider’s Mag is all about. “It’s all about all the Rider’s” Some we comment on, some we laugh with, some we laugh at and some we ride together with. It’s all in good fun and in respect depending on your taste and style. It takes all kinds to make the biking community what it is, so don’t take life too serious, nobody gets out alive! Never hesitate to ride past the last street light at the edge of town.

If you require information on the Mag from Northern Ontario like advertising, coverage of events or even just getting a printed copy, the best way to get a hold of me is either through text/call @ 705-662-1526 or email at ThatNorthernGuy144@gmail.com. Use your smartphone to scan QR code to get all the contact information. Ride safe!

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 39

Kitchener H-D Ladies Garage Night 2015

SPRAY TODAY! SAVE TOMORROW

Today is March 27, 2015 with a temperature of -5oC (windshield factor -13oC) and colder on the weekend…When will the nice weather be here? What a long, cold winter!

Fortunately for us…the ladies, Kitchener Harley-Davidson held on March 12th the much anticipated and attended Ladies Only Garage Party. I believe this event was also one that some men wanted to attend; I have attended these parties on numerous occasions and it was the first year we had that many men!

As usual, the event attracted a numerous crowd and many different activities to keep us all busy and happy. This year, we had the pleasure of being able to talk and admire custom leathers made by Lissa Hill Leather from Hamilton. I have custom leather pants, hair wrap, water resistant purse and now half leather This Ad chaps, all made by Lissa.

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Also present at the event, were two wonderful ladies from Learning Curves Motorcycle Rider Training, encouraging the ladies to be part of this wonderful journey that so many of us are enjoying on our own motorcycles. A motorcycle training course was also drawn and made the lucky winner very happy.

I cannot forget the bike pickup demonstration that everyone who tried managed to accomplish; the sangria tasting and sparkling wine; the buffet table; the singer; the photographer; deals; fashion show and friends.

Once again, a great evening!

Now the waiting is almost over… soon, very soon, we will be riding our babies!

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Mini Street Glide

This month’s feature guy is Jim from Keswick and this is his 2005 XL 1200 Sportster. Jim says that back in the day he rode dirt bikes in the Humber River Valley in Etobicoke when he was growing up but that since then he never owned a bike but he had always wanted to get himself a street bike and more specifically a Harley-Davidson Motorcycle.

After finishing up his schooling Jim became a mechanic at a large automobile dealership along the 401 and he said that he really enjoyed his work and that he bought himself a house in the Keswick area several decades ago with some waterfront on a canal and got himself a boat. He says that things were great until he took a fall on a staircase at his place of work and severely damaged his back. After a lengthy reha-

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 42

bilitation process including physio therapy the powers that be in Ontario sent him for retraining since his injuries would no longer allow him to work in the automotive industry.

This coincided with the outbreak of computers into both the business and home environments and since he had studied computers and had vast knowledge of networks, viruses, printers and all the usual things that we all know come up from time to time in our work environments or in our home computer systems he found himself a niche in the computer repair and maintenance business. He started his own business and acquiring a number of corporate clients and the inevitable home users Jim established a good solid business maintaining and repairing computers.

A few years back that itch that comes and goes that most of us have experienced rears its head again and we start looking around for a bike. Jim had watched the riding population grow over the years and as his business grew he found himself looking around at bikes for sale while he was on the road. Checking on line listings and just shopping around in general, he wasn’t sure exactly what he wanted but he knew he wanted a great deal on a nice ride with low mileage and super clean.

Well he found himself this 2005 sportster. Iit was about 6 years old and the odometer was reading a measly 6000 km’s on the bike and Jim felt the price was fair for a bike that was in mint condition had nearly no miles on it, was priced at about half of what it would cost to buy a brand new one and as far as he could tell this one was nearly new. Once he acquired his bike he thought that all he wanted to do was ride but he told me that once he bought his first piece of chrome for the bike that was the beginning and he has never looked back.

As you can tell by looking at this bike it has had extensive changes made to it while nothing was so major as to require cutting the frame or anything that dramatic. Jim says that he likes to think of his bike as a mini street glide and

he has spent the past 3 years adding a little bit of everything to the bike, he started that first year with the 21” chromed aluminum wheel and the custom front fender. Once that was in he decided to look into a chrome front end and after looking at the work involved he decided to hand polish the front forks himself putting enough elbow grease on to make them look chrome.

Then he started replacing parts on the engine adding chrome rocker boxes, lifter blocks, a hyper charger, chrome pipes just to mention a few and when he had the engine all done up he went on to focus on the belt guard, riding pegs, brake pedal and gear shift, grips, controls and cables. Of course being a former mechanic was an asset to Jim in this work.

While in Florida he located the custom bags which include marker and signal lights integral into them and an H style fairing which like the bags are quick release giving the bike the feel of the dyna convertible with the quick on and off luggage so if he wants to go out and tour he’s got the gear and if he wants to rip around town he’s got that speedster that makes the sporty so popular.

Jim hopes to find some time to take a long ride out to the East Coast saying that he has heard many good things about Atlantic Canada and the Cabot Trail and would like to ride them when the time is right for him. He has been mulling whether to hire someone to help with his business or contract out but he says more importantly one of his best riding buddies was recently diagnosed with cancer and expressed a desire to ride Route 66 when he was finished with his chemotherapy.

This was a very exciting prospect for me as this is one of the items on my own bucket list, to ride Route 66 from Chicago to L.A. Jim says that his buddy wants to go and that they are planning to ship their bikes to the start and have them picked up at the end knowing that the friend is suffering but it is certainly something that you would want to do sooner than later with a friend in those circumstances. I hope that he makes the trip.

I was somewhat surprised when I asked Jim about the fate of this bike in the face of an upgrade if he felt that there was one in his future and he candidly said that yes if he came upon a gently ridden Street Glide motorcycle, relatively new, with low mileage that he would definitely be interested in purchasing it and getting to work on that. Knowing that he would most likely never recover all of the money he has invested into the sporty but he said he was aware of that but the patience in finding a new bike for himself would be the same patience that governs his sale of his first ride.

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Bikers Church Would you think that I’m “losing it” if I admitted that I do not believe in “The Power of Prayer?”. I estimate my prayer list in the thousands over the last several years but why do I pray if I don’t subscribe to this concept of the “Power of Prayer” that seems to be so popular with many Christians?

I’ll answer that in just a moment. One thing that annoys me when I see the many prayer requests on Facebook and some friends write, “Sending kind thoughts your way...” and the first thing I think is that it’s nice that you’re thinking kindly of your friend in need and have stepped up and said so. The next thing I automatically think is, “Hey, wait a minute, your friend asked for prayer!”

The most powerful thing you can do is to actually call out to God in prayer for yourself and on behalf of others. He is listening for you!

The answer to question number one is that I believe in the power of God. The supreme power of our Creator who only awaits our little spark of belief in Him. I have seen a great number of seeming coincidences that are answers to prayer as well as God putting me in the right place at the right time in the last few years. The numbers don’t lie; way too many coincidences equal many little miracles.

I don’t believe in the power of prayer but I believe in the power of God, so I pray! I learned that from my friend, Pastor Jeff. I talk to God like He is right there with me because He is! As a matter of fact, if I’m riding my bike with you and my radio is off, I’m probably saying a prayer for you as we ride.

In Luke 11:9, Jesus says, “So I say to you, ask, and it shall be given to you.” In this chapter, His message on prayer says to ask God for what we need, expecting that it will be given.

So let’s do just that!

I’m going to break from tradition now and ask you to say a prayer for me as the Hamilton Biker Church Pastor, that I can do a good job this riding season. As you do that, of course, you are exercising your own spirituality and making your own connection to God stronger. That’s the whole point!

John 13:31 reports Jesus saying, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you.” This is known as the eleventh commandment and as we care for each other in prayer and friendship, we follow that commandment well.

God bless you big time! See you on the road.

Pastor Ken Williams While I change phone # and email this month, the best way to contact me is at www. hamiltonbikerschurch.com and message me in the Contact Us tab.

P.S. Pastor Dave sends his greetings and prayers, too.

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THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 44

Mini Street Glide

Fenders: Klock Werks Headlight: Fairing: Memphis shades Turn Signals: Smoked Led GENERAL Taillight: Küryakyn smoker LED Fabrication by: Jim Waller Year & Make: 2005 Sportster Electrics: Electronics Optional security system Model:XL1200C Oil Tank: factory Mirrors: Bikers choice ENGINE Grips: Küryakyn ISO Year: 2005 Speedometer: Digital Tac/ Model: EVO Speedo Combo Builder:H-D Gauges: Oil temp Coils/Wires: Stock Gas Tanks: 4.5 gal Ignition: Stock Foot Controls: Forward Displacement: 73.20 cubic Seat: Anniversary Edition HD inches Heads: High Compression Hi Front Pegs: Küryakyn ISO Rear Pegs: Küryakyn ISO flow Cam(s): High performance HD Primary Cover: Chrome cams WHEELS & FENDERS Carb: CV Air Cleaner: D&M Spiked assembly Pipes: Vance and Hines Big FRONT radius Size: 21 Type: EPC Sweeper TRANSMISSION Rim Width: 2.15 Type: 5 speed Tire: MH90-21 54H Primary Drive: Chain Fenders: Klock Werks Gears: 1st 9.454 2nd 6.500 Fender Struts: 3rd 5.040 4th 4.152 5th 3.517 Brakes: 11.5 Owner: Jim Waller City: Keswick

PAINTING Colour: Vivid Black

REAR Size: 16 FRAME/SUSPENSION Type: Solid slotted chrome Rake: 30.1 Rim Width: 3.5 Swing Arm: Stock Tire: 150/80B16 71H Rear Suspension: Progressive Brakes: 11.5 Fenders: Factory ACCESSORIES Bars: Factory Model: Michelle Risers: Chrome pull-back handlebar riser Controls: Forward

Hogtown Spring Open House

By this time many of us have managed to shake of the PMS of winter. Sitting on our rides in our man cave/woman caves and making motorcycle sounds has officially come to an end. After all the ass kissing Mother nature had to do, she finally got old man winter to admit defeat and leave us alone. To get the riding season off to a great start HogTown Cycles oiled the hinges on the shop doors and fired up the BBQ for their Open house and Demo Day event.

May 2nd was the perfect day for us to get out and blow the carbon out of both our heads and the pipes on our bikes. Saddling up with a few friends we took to the open roads and headed west.

HogTown Cycles is located in Lucan approximately 20 minutes north of London and 20 minutes west of Stratford. It appears to be a small quiet little town, but today the town got it’s Harley Hello wake up call.

We arrived shortly after 11:00 to find the parking lot and street packed with bikes. Every bike from mild to wild were there taking in the events. Willy Styles was hammering out the tunes for the guests and everyone was enjoying the mild weather and copious amounts of sunshine.

Mike and Theresa wanted me to make sure to thank the weather god’s for cooperating today. All the sun brought

by Kaz

making sure everyone filled up on burgers. Sure was hoping for some of her chili but, I was told that I’d have wait for Baconfest in July.

It was nice to get out and see everyone again after one of the longest winters that I can recall. Mike and Theresa want to thank Parts Canada for the door prize donations as well as their families, friends and all the staff that manned the BBQ’s, displays, New and used parts tents and charity booth. Most of all they would like to thank everyone that came out and made this another great time.

As more bikes continued to roll in during the day so it was difficult to peg a number on attendance but the parking lot and store were busy all day. It was time for us to pack up and head out. On the road again and checking out all the great events this year will prove to be a challenge. As more and more people join the 2 wheel community, many new rides and events are happening every weekend. Bike nights are happening everywhere so get out there and support them, but most of all remember to ride safe and keep supporting the advertisers that keep The Riders Mag free for you to enjoy.

Kaz

out lots of people to finish accessorising their ride or take a bike for a test drive. The Free 98.1 courtesy cruiser was also on hand to fill in for Willy during the breaks. Wandering around and mingling with the quests I got the feeling that Mike, Theresa and all the staff are well liked and appreciated by their customers. As avid riders they have always shared their love for riding and enjoy making everyone welcome at all the store events. Mike’s mom & dad even get involved manning the BBQ’s with friends Nancy & Gary Hanson

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Motorcyco Beau

Well we got our wish and Spring finally came and with it comes so many choices to get to as many events and rides possible. A week before the month of May kicked in I attended the ceremony being held at Ottawa’s City Hall where it was officially proclaimed that the month of May is Motorcycle Awareness Month and while the temperature was only about 5 degrees or so that didn’t stop about 60 local riders from coming out to show their support. As I have written in the past this all came about years ago as the brainchild of an organization called S.O.A.R. (Society of Ottawa Area

Riders) and through the effort of many different members it wasn’t long before there were signs on the back of city buses and other places reminding car drivers to be more aware of motorcycles and their responsibility to share the road. Since that time S.O.A.R. has also been able to get the province to come on board so now across Ontario it is officially Motorcycle Awareness month and in last month’s issue we participated along with the other supporters like ORA

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(613) 392-8433 www.makeitroar.com THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 46

tales from the Far East.... of Ontario that is!

(Ontario Road Riders Assoc.), City of Ottawa, and M.T.O. are spreading the word.

I heard someone say they thought the information should be reaching out to only car drivers , well last time I looked just about everyone who rides a motorcycle owns a car or truck and if all the riders across Ontario now follow SOAR’s lead and tell their local politicians that they want their communities to start getting on board with campaigns that will inform automobile drivers they have a responsibility to pay attention and since the ad came out a number of riders have contacted me and told me they are forming their own groups to demand more projects like this one!.. Kudos to SOAR, for spreading the word.

The following week saw not only a big rise in the temperature but also one of my favorite events of the year, the Capital City Bikers Church Swap Meet and thanks to the

co-operation of the weather the turnout for this year’s event was one of the best ever and Hillbilly told me that all the vendors spaces had been booked back over a month earlier. There is not a lot I can say about this year’s event other than it was an awesome turnout and it ran like a well tuned Harley with lots of vendors and swap tables inside and a street full of motorcycles on the outside. I tried as much as possible to get around to see as many people as possible but even in the 5 hours or so the show there just isn’t enough time. On the opposite side of the hall Mr. Harley himself, Doug Taylor who is also an honorary member of TCB was sharing a couple of tables with another old rascal I have the pleasure of calling a brother, Felix or who many of you may know as Mr. Cycle Salvage and while it is always a hoot to hook up with these two guys sadly Felix told me a close friend had been in an accident coming back from his place and when he said the name of the rider it didn’t ring a bell but a few days later on Facebook, a friend of mine of six decades posted a eulogy for his brother and then it hit me that I knew the rider who died. Once again it brought home that we all have to be extra careful out there on the roads and remember to stay alert!

Many good friends and supporters came by our booth and asked about the “beadonor.ca” banner we had on display and once again sometimes things that happen to us personally have a major influence in roads we choose to take.Back in February while we were doing the Ottawa International Motorcycle Show a very dear lady, far beyond a friend was undergoing a double lung transplant back in Toronto and because some caring person registered to be an organ donor.

While I will never know the sex, the age, or the name of the individual

who saved the “Lovely” Shirley’s life I am pleased to tell you that at this time she is not only doing well she just called to tell us she is being cleared to come back to Ottawa in a week or so.

All of us at the Mag along with The Celtic Brotherhood ask all motorcycle riders and our supporters out there to please take the time to register at the website, BeADonor.ca because we all understand that while

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 47

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Something else I think I should mention to everyone is about two area riders one being Shawn Dawson, owner of Fatboys Smokehouse and Dan Allaston owner of Ottawa’s New Moon Tattoo Studios. Both Shawn & Dan participated in a charity event called Dream Mountain Foundation which was founded by Shawn and where participants traveled to Nepal and plan to climb to the base camp of Mount Everest and by doing so collected money for various charities. Dan was climbing for Ride for Dad and a day or so before they were to begin climbing, Nepal was hit with a magnitude 7.8

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 48

earthquake that so far has been responsible for the death of thousands of people. Luckily, Shawn, Dan and the rest of their party were not hurt but they had to cancel their climb and we had been looking forward to Dan sending us pics from up on Mt. Everest holding a copy of The Riders Mag but like the t-shirt says Shit Happens! So we will have to wait until next year when the guys are in Chile climbing one of the

Andes, for that picture. For local riders who participate in the Ride for Dad, please remember to thank Dan for his effort and time in promoting RFD because I am sure he raise a hell of a lot of money for that charity and deserves a thank you.

Well if the weather so far is any indication of what the rest of the year is going to be then things are shaping up to be a good riding season. I will be attending as many events as I can possibly get to and support and I hope that when you see me you will take the time to say hello. Some of those events will be the Denny’s (South Keys – Ottawa) Motorcycle & Car Event for Traumatic Brain Injury & PTSD Awareness Project featuring TCB’s Busted Bucket Challenge. Moncion’s 2nd Annual Ride for Her to create Ovarian Cancer Awareness. Big Daddy’s 3rd Annual Poker Run and the Simple Men MC’s Poker Run for Kate.

One last thing I should mention is that after about 8 years I and The Celtic Brotherhood have

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stopped hosting the motorcycle part of the Forever 2 Wheels of Wednesday Cruise Night at Rideau Carleton Raceway because between my duties to see the Riders Mag keeps getting out to all of you and the different projects that both the Mag & TCB are involved with I had to make a decision on priorities and so we have let go of our involvement with the cruise nights, but I am sure after all these years they will continue on.

Contact Andrew 613-808-1388

20.00 per person - Gates Open at 9 am 468A Faught Road Cobden Ontario (Between Pembroke and Cobden, turn off 417 to Cornerview Rd. to Faught Rd.)

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We Make Our Motorcycle Communities Stronger!... By Making Them Better!...

Ride Safe! Ride Proud! ... Brotherhood!

Motorcyco Beau

June Is:

BRAIN INJURY AWARENESS MONTH

Please remember that there are far more rides and events than I can ever hope to get to. So I feel it only fair to put those who were kind enough to support the Mag by placing an advertisement and I also urge you to please support the businesses whose ads you see in the Mag because without their support we couldn’t do what we do!

As always I want to remind you that if you are an event –ride or a business that deals with either motorcycles or the people who ride them you might like to advertise or carry “The Riders Mag” ..Please contact me by email or phone.

E m a i l :

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THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 49

Flat

Tracking

by Aaron Hesmer

Exciting news swept the flat track world a couple of weeks ago which was the announcement of the X GAMES introducing flat track to be a feature event. Many people of older generations think who really cares? They always knew flat track was a bad ass sport. The reason I think its exciting is because people of a younger generation might have thought for a couple of decades now that flat track seemed like it wasn’t extreme enough and therefore lacked credibility to a younger audience.

Well in recent times young people have started to realize that blowing a full drift at speeds over 100 mph handle bar to handle bar is actually pretty gnarly. And as the sport of flat track continues to rise once again, with a helping trend of the ‘street tracker’ and having the sport a part of the X GAMES, we might actually see the sport be televised regularly and become a little bit more mainstream.

The amount of media attention and publicity the X GAMES gets in the week of June is pretty crazy. For those who don’t know top competitors from around the world get invited to compete in the X GAMES. Mississauga Ontario’s 2815 Argentia Road, very own Doug Lawrence will be there to compete and represent Canada.

Mississauga, Ontario, L5N 8G6 So regardless tune into to cheer Doug on in Austin 905-858-0966 • www.jacoxharley.com Texas June 4th and come out to watch Doug compete live in Welland Ontario on June 6th at a Flat Track Canada Summer Hours: Mon.-Fri. 9-7 Sat. 9-4 Sun. 10-3 event, how cool is that?

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 50

R

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 51

Ladies and their Harleys

This month’s Lady is Sharon from Welland and this incredible looking ride started out life as a mid 90’s red Heritage Softail. We featured Sharon’s first bike many years ago which was a Sportster done up to look like a Heritage Softail. Having said that it likely makes perfect sense that she would go from a stock Sportster to a Sportster built out to look like a Heritage to a Big Twin, this is how it happened.

Sharon’s husband Cam is a very capable fellow with wrenches and has proven over the years that he has an aptitude for working on and customizing his motorcycles, 3 of which have been featured in the mag over the years. Of course this would also include working on whatever Sharon has as well and we have chronicled a few of their rides over the years along with their seeming desire to attend motor-

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 52

cycle events not only in every corner of North America, but beyond on other continents as well.

You can run down the list of all the most common bike events that occur in places near and far, Sturgis, Myrtle Beach, Daytona, Laconia, then throw in a recent trip to an event on the Jersey shores south of Atlantic City, they are talking about visiting an event this summer in Austin Texas.

The point is that they have made efforts to attend bike events near and far and say that they usually make a weekend into a long weekend by leaving on a Thursday and returning on a Tuesday to do events that are in the warm weather months and are near enough to ride to.

At an event that required trailering their bikes Cam wanted to show his Sportster in a local show, it’s a solo rider machine and he asked Sharon to ride his Fat Boy to the event so that they could have something to scoot around on over the course of the day while the Sportster was engaged in the show. Sharon says that she was apprehensive for about 2

seconds and once she rode the Big Twin Softail that was the end for her, no more riding her Sportster made to look like a Heritage Softail. She felt she was ready to ride a Big Twin.

They say that Cam went over to Clare’s and picked out a mostly stock late 90’s Red Heritage Softail and brought it home and put it under the tree as a Christmas gift for Sharon. She verified the story as unlikely as it sounds. She says that she was totally surprised and equally thrilled at the prospect of getting the big bike, of course her other bike would have to be sold as there were space restrictions and they could not keep the old bike.

Cam says that they started removing stuff from that heritage softail within an hour of the surprise and the rest is pretty much history. Sharon gets lots of ideas from their extensive travel and gets to check out bikes all over the place getting ideas for how she wants her bike to be and often will blend two or three different looks together. I have to say I only glanced at the photo that Cam emailed me before the shoot and filed it, I had it in my brain that it was a Heritage Springer.

Well obviously my memory stinks cause this ain’t no Heritage Springer and when it comes to originality this bike gets a 10 in my book. They say she rode it stock that first year after she got the bike and she picked up the air cleaner, thought that it looked cool and it rolled on from there. The bike was torn down, drive line was removed, nose cone and rocker boxes were strategically powder coated, front forks and oil tank.

The front fender was stripped of its marker light and chrome cowl, the rear fender was replaced with a wide tire kit and bag extensions picked up in Florida. The extensions were fitted to a set of saddlebags acquired at a swap meet, the true dual pipes were sand blasted and powder coated and painted black. Once all the pieces were fitted together the sheet metal was sent out for matte black paint, still a few years ahead of when Harley brought out their first bikes with that sort of paint job.

Once the bike was back together Sharon next decided that it needed a fairing and some tunes saying there are actually two of them, one that’s painted to match the rest of the paint job and this one that’s on the bike which was purchased to give her a better view of the road being just a little short. Cam says that the fairing was a couple inches shorter, maybe but the windshield was a couple inches taller so it was a wash, he built a custom bracket to lower the head light and put the fairing back on low enough so Sharon can see well.

The kicker on the pipes is that under those ex-

tended bags those pipes have turn downs on them and she says that they kick up a shitload of dust on gravel roads and the paint is a real bitch to clean and if you scratch it can’t be buffed out so there might be a new paint job in Sharon’s future, going to a gloss enamel was raised as an option. The following year Cam got a deal on a couple of 6 speed transmissions on the internet so removed the 5’s from both their rides and installed 6’s to improve the ride and range of their bikes on those long weekend rides.

Sharon says that she would like a new seat on her bike and also would like to get those fishtail pipes that were popular on the older FLH’s back in the day as she says the original owner said he had a set for that bike but it’s just figuring out how to get them out the back without dragging on the ground, and oh yeah the bike has air suspension on the rear, which she asked Cam to install after riding the switchbacks on Mount Rushmore outside of Sturgis, Cam says that when he put the air to the rear he also added a race tech to the front to give the bike balance.

Sharon says she has her eye on a Softail slim but is very happy with the ride she has now and just looks forward to all the riding that she gets to do with Cam and in case you didn’t notice she never runs out of ideas of how she wants her bikes no matter what’s she’s riding. I am particularly fond of this sweet ride.

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 53

Sticker

‘And here we go! Keep your hands in the car . . . we’re gonna go reeeeal fast now!

Lunch Halfway Spring was a long time coming but when it did finally get here both the bike and I were ready for some miles. The weather prediction for April 19th was sunny and to be the

Stories

by Sharon

the sun goes down quick in April so we said our goodbyes and split off in three directions again. Many of us will meet again soon at Spring Bash. Adventures are much more fun on two wheels aren’t they?

Platinum Powersports Open House The following Saturday started with a biker’s weather forecast, then free ice cream and motorcycles popped up on facebook so guess what happened next? I straddled the husband and ran him down to Clinton in search of free ice cream and more motorcycles because it was Platinum Powersport’s Open House. What an interesting day! There were people and motorcycles everywhere, down the laneway, around the outbuildings, and the parking lot was jammed. We were

warmest day since October 2014, possibilities of up to 13 degrees! In the usual nature of not planning anything too far in advance, Susie and I decided the night before that we would meet halfway for lunch similar to last year making it a good long rip for both of us. We decided to meet in Orillia, a few food hours each way for both of us. By morning we

treated to free ice cream, sausages, great deals, and a burnout duel. It turns out if you do a burnout at Donald’s shop for 15 seconds and purchase a tire from the shop, you get FREE installation, that’s how he rolls!

The people and their motorcycles always seem to be the best and most interesting part of any event. I’m not going to give a run-down of names that turned out for the Open House, it was great to see every single one of you, but I must mention a few of the new to you bike changes for 2015. Jennifer finally has the sporty out after some frustrating challenges that kiboshed last year so that was her first real run!

Great to see more women grabbing the reins and I must say she’s riding it like she means it! Ran into the infamous Giant with his new ride. He’s also tired of the Harley stealership

were both quite surprised to see a few more wanting to join us, from all It’s Kool To Drink Healthy directions. By the time we all met in Orillia we were representing quite a Fill your 18L Jugs with few areas including Hanover, PeterReverse Osmosis Water borough, Minden, and Parry Sound.

I met up with Brenda and Suzanne At Our New Inside/Outside Fill Station from the “Wild Hags” and we rode together from Hanover, my pleasure riding with ladies who can handle their bikes, thanks for a great rip!

We went to three Tim’s before finding the right one, third’s the charm! It was a fun mix of people.

Better There were some who had never Better Tasting met and had no connection, some Tasting Ice people who knew one another from Water Facebook, some who knew one an- 2228 Chiefswood Rd, RR 2 Ohsweken N0A 1M0 other personally, and two that I had Mon - Fri 8:30am to 6pm actually met in person before! Lunch was great, we didn’t stay too long as 519-445-0292 koolkidzice1@gmail.com

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 54

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and although he’s kept the old beefed up, billion horsepower Harley beast, the new one is a beautiful Indian. Linda Smiley was also there with her new Harley that’s allegedly faster than a gopher shot out of a potato gun but I didn’t get to

Part” was a fun one! Free calendars for everyone, great deals, and of course, motorcycles and their people! The shop has a full sized Harley Davidson attached up high on the wall, always wondered whose job it is to shine it up every few months.

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see it go . . . yet. To actually confirm this, we must take a quick rip down a short mile. Surf bought himself a 1400 Intruder. I took a short rip with Surf on the way home and the Road King kinda kept up but I think we need a better road to make sure, think we should do that again maybe.

Yup, the times and the motorcycles, they are a changing!

GT Cycle Bike Night The following Thursday was the warmest day since Sept. 2015 which just happened to coincide with GT Cycle’s Bike Night in Shallow Lake. Because I had already started riding to work, I stopped in on the way home sort of.

Greg, Krista, and Mitch did a great job on the draws - “Guess the

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SLBRO Motorcycle Awareness Ride The first real hot and humid day that I could ride anywhere far was May 9th, which was also the 26th Annual Sarnia-Lambton BRO Motorcycle Awareness Ride. Forecast was spotty storms but it was warm so I decided to go for a long ride. The ride was split up in two because of the size. First the ride did a lap around Sarnia, then off to Petrolia to the Legion. I handed my camera off to a passenger who took some great pictures of the ride in progress.

It was another safe and well or-

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ganized ride, pretty sure Sarnia is aware that there are many motorcyclists in the area.

I like to believe that these types of rides DO make a difference and encourage everyone to attend, organize, or participate somehow in at least ONE Motorcycle Awareness event every year. There are many more awareness events in May and throughout the year.

May 23 is the date for the Lake Huron Steel Horse Riders/ ABATE/CMC co-operative Motorcycle Awareness Campaign. There will be events in Goderich, Wyoming, Exeter, Woodstock and Mitchell.

ABATE Kitchener On May 9th, Kitchener Chapter 12 ABATE presented a cheque for $1,000 to King Edward Public School for the Nutrition Program. The money was raised by a “Surf * Turf” Raffle. $5 tickets were sold for a chance to win a dozen lobsters and a dozen steaks, won by Gooch. Not sure of the date of the BBQ yet but it’s in Perth County!

There’s been some more loss as well as all the fun and good things. Inny Hayes, master of the potato gun has passed away. I remember the extravagant rig they used ether on to send the tater into the second field. I remember saying “just a minute, let me move my car!” before they shot that wild thing off. The biker world also lost the loud voice of Ken MacDonald who kept us informed and aware or our rights as motorcyclists and worked hard to spread Motorcycle Awareness. With many motorcyclists back on the road, there have been some motorcycle accident fatalities this month in Ontario. Life is fragile and often far too short so celebrate the small things, hug your loved ones close, and be aware of the dangers around you. May they all RIP.’ Whoopsy daisy! My apologies to ABATE, it turns out I had the Pool Tournament info incorrect. The ABATE pool tournament was an ABATE Ontario event held in London. It was not a Kitchener ABATE event however, all ABATE Chapters participated and chipped in to make this event successful! Thanks ABATE for the correction!

2. FORK 3. PANTS 4. PULSE 5. SIX 6. BOOKS You got all 6 wrong, didn’t you?

You do NOT have Alzheimer’s; You are a Pervert.

Subject: The meaning of the word “service” I became confused when I heard the word “Service” used with these agencies: Internal Revenue ‘Service’ Postal ‘Service’ Telephone ‘Service’ Cable TV ‘Service Civil ‘Service’ Municipal, City, & Public ‘Service’ Customer ‘Service’ This is not what I thought ‘Service’ meant.

But today, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them said he had hired a bull to ‘Service’ a few cows.

BAM!!! It all came into focus.

Now I understand what all those agencies are doing to us.

Defence Attorney: Will you please state your age?

Old Lady: I am 94 years old.

Defence Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st?

Old Lady: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.

Defence Attorney: Did you know him?

Old Lady: No, but he sure was friendly.

Defence Attorney: What happened after he sat down?

Old Lady: He started to rub my thigh.

Defence Attorney: Did you stop him?

Old Lady: No, I didn’t stop him.

Defence Attorney: Why not?

Little Old Lady: It felt good. Nobody had done that since my David died some 30 years ago.

Defence Attorney: What happened next?

Old Lady: He began to rub all over my body.

Defence Attorney: Did you stop him then?

Old Lady: No, I did not stop him.

Defence Attorney: Why not?

Old Lady: His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven’t felt that good in years!

Defence Attorney: What happened next?

Old Lady: Well, by then, I was feeling so horny that I just laid down and told him ‘Take me, young man. Take me now!’

Defence Attorney: Did he take you?

Old Lady: Hell, no! He just yelled, ‘April Fool!’

And that’s when I shot him, the little bastard.

I met a genie today that granted me one wish.

“I want to live forever,” I said.

“Sorry” said the genie, “I’m not allowed to grant wishes like that.”

“Fine” I said, “I want to die after the Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup.” “You crafty bastard,” said the genie.

Retirement is different for everyone…

One day, while going to the shop, I passed by a retirement village.

On the front lawn were six old ladies, lying naked on the grass.

I thought this was a bit unusual, but continued on my way.

On my return trip, I passed the same retirement village with the same six old ladies lying naked on the lawn.

This time my curiosity got the better of me and went inside to talk to the retirement village Administrator, and asked her, “Do you know there are six ladies lying naked on your front lawn?”

“Yes,” she said, “aren’t they darlings? They’re retired prostitutes - they’re having a yard sale.”

Men Are Just Happier People What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them. New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Two pairs of shoes are more than enough.. You almost never have strap problems in public You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color.. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 57

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THOUGHT FOR THE DAY A married man should forget his mistakes. There’s no use in two people remembering the same thing!

I become confused when I hear the word “Service” used with these agencies: Canada Revenue ‘Service’ Canada Post ‘Service’ Telephone ‘Service’ Cable TV ‘Service’ Civil ‘Service’ Federal, Province, Municipal & Public ‘Service’ Hydro Customer ‘Service’ This is NOT what I thought ‘Service’ meant.

But today, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them said he had hired a bull to ‘Service’ a few cows.

BAM!!! It all came into focus. Now I understand what all those agencies are doing to us.

You are now as enlightened as I am.

There was a man who lost one of his arms in an accident.

He became very depressed because he loved to play golf.

One day in his despair, he decided to commit suicide.

He got on an elevator and went to the top of a building to jump off. He was standing on the ledge looking down and saw this man down on the side walk skipping along, whooping and kicking up his heels.

He looked closer and saw that this man didn’t have any arms at all.

He started thinking, “What am I doing up here feeling sorry for myself? I still have one good arm to do things with.”

He thought “There goes a man with no arms skipping down the sidewalk so happy, and going on with his life.”

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 58

He hurried down to the side walk and caught up with the man with no arms.

He told him how glad he was to see him because he lost one of his arms and felt useless and was going to kill himself. He thanked him for saving his life and said he knew he could make it with one arm if the guy could go on with no arms.

The man with no arms began dancing and whooping and kicking up his heels again.

He asked, “Why are you so happy anyway?”

He said, “I’m NOT happy. My balls itch.”

Heart-warming stories like this just make me want to cry...

It was Saturday morning as Mike, an avid hunter from Augusta, Georgia, woke up raring to go bag the first deer of the season.

He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife Jenelle, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage.

Mike asks her, “What are you up to?”

Jenelle smiles, “I’m going hunting with you!”

Mike, though he had many reservations about this, reluctantly decides to take her along.

Two hours later they arrive at a game preserve just north of Greenville, Georgia.

Mike sets his lovely Jenelle safely up in the tree stand and tells her, “If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and I’ll come running back as soon as I hear the shot.”

Mike walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Jenelle couldn’t bag an elephant - much less a deer.

Not 10 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears an array of gunshots. Quickly, Mike starts running back. As Mike gets closer to her stand, he hears Jenelle screaming, get the #$%^ away from my deer!”

Confused and frightened, Mike races faster towards Jenelle’s screams. And again he hears her yell, “Get the #$%^ away from my deer!” followed by another volley of gunfire!

Now within sight of where he had left Jenelle, Mike is surprised to see a Georgia game warden with his hands high in the air.

The game warden, obviously distraught, yelled, “Okay, lady!

You can have your deer, just let me get my saddle off it!”

Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was closed for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien addressed it saying, ‘Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader.’

The gas pump, of course, didn’t respond The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.

The older alien said, ‘I’d calm down if I were you.’

The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again, there was no response.

Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump’s haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said impatiently, ‘Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your leader or I will fire!’

The older alien again warned his comrade saying, ‘You probably don’t want to do that! I really don’t think you should make him mad.’

‘Rubbish,’ replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at the pump and opened fire. There was a huge explosion.

A massive fireball roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and deposited him a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus patch.

Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green head.

‘What a ferocious creature!’ exclaimed the young, fried alien. ‘He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?’

The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his

crispy friend and replied, ‘If there’s one thing I’ve learned during my intergalactic travels, you don’t want to mess with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and then stick it in his ear.

One day a teacher was asking her class to use absolutely in a sentence.

So Janet raised her hand and said the sky is absolutely blue, The teacher said no, it is not, sometimes is black or has different colors.

Another little boy raised his hand and said “the leaves on the trees are absolutely green” the teacher said no, They could be different colors at different times of the year.

Little Johnny raised his hand and asked if there where lumps in farts, The teachers said no, I don’t believe so.

And Little Johnny said, “Well then I absolutely just shit in my pants!”

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into some perspective in one of its releases.

A: A billion seconds ago it was 1959.

B: A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive.

C: A billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age. D: A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet.

E: A billion Dollars ago was only 13 hours and 12 minutes, at the rate our government is spending it!

an. It seems to me that you’re not holding up your side of things.”

My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 23-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap house, driving a junk car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white TV. Aren’t older women great? They really know how to solve an old guy’s problems!

A bakery owner hires a young female shop assistant who liked to wear very short skirts and thong panties.

One day a young man enters the store, glances at the shop assistant and at the loaves of bread behind the counter.

Noticing her short skirt and the location of the raisin bread, he has a brilliant idea.

“I’d like some raisin bread please,” the man says.

The shop assistant nods and climbs up a ladder to reach the raisin bread located on the very top shelf.

The man standing almost directly beneath her is provided with an excellent view, just as he thought.

When she descends the ladder, he decides that he had better get two loaves.

As the shop assistant retrieves the second loaf of bread, one of the other male customers notices what’s going on and requests his own loaf of raisin bread.

After many trips she is tired and irritated and begins to wonder, “Why the unusual interest in the raisin bread?”

Atop the ladder one more time, she looks down and glares at the men standing below.

Then, she notices an elderly man standing amongst the crowd.

Thinking that she can save herself another trip, she yells at the elderly man,

A FLORIDA COURT SETS ATHEIST HOLY DAY In Florida, an atheist created a case against Easter and Passover Holy days.

He hired an attorney to bring a discrimination case against Christians and Jews and observances of their holy days.

The argument was that it was unfair that atheists had no such recognized days.

The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the passionate presentation by the lawyer, the judge banged his gavel declaring, “Case dismissed!”

The lawyer immediately stood and objecting to the ruling saying, “Your honor, How can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and others.

The Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah, yet my client and all other atheists have no such holidays...”

The judge leaned forward in his chair saying, “But you do.

Your client, counselor, is woefully ignorant.”

The lawyer said,” Your Honor, we are unaware of any special observance or holiday for atheists.”

The judge said, “The calendar says April 1st is April Fool’s Day. Over 20 yrs of Award Psalm 14:1 states, ‘The fool says in his Pans~Shaping heart, there is no God.’ Thus, it is the opinion of this court, that, Engraving~Studs if your client says there is no God, then he is a fool.

Therefore, April 1st is his day.

Court is adjourned...”

After being married for 50 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said, “Fifty years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 23-year-old girl.

Now ... I have a $750,000 home, a $45,000 car, a nice big bed and a large screen TV, but I’m sleeping with a 73-year-old wom-

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“Is it raisin for you too?”

“No,” stammers the old man, “but it’s quivering a little.”

Two businessmen in new shopping mall were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new shop...As yet, the shop wasn’t ready, with only a few shelves set up.

One said to the other, “I bet any minute now some pensioner is going to walk by, put their face to the window, and ask what we’re selling.”

No sooner were the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious old woman walked to the window, had a peek, and in a soft voice asked, “What are you selling here?”

One of the men replied sarcastically, “We’re selling assholes.”

Without skipping a beat, the old dear said, “Must be doing well... Only two left.”

A guy goes into Canada Post to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, “Are you allergic to anything?”

He replies, “Yes, caffeine. I can’t drink coffee.”

“Ok, have you ever been in the military service?”

“Yes,” he says, “I was in Afghanistan for one tour.”

The interviewer says, “That will give you 5 extra points toward employment.” Then he asks, “Are you disabled in any way?”

The guy says, “Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles.”

The interviewer grimaces and then says, “Disabled in your country’s service! Well that qualifies for extra bonus points.

Okay. Looking at the regulations you have got enough points for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 8:00 am to 4:00 PM. You can start tomorrow at 10:00 am, and plan on starting at 10:00 am every day.”

The guy is puzzled and asks, “If the work hours are from 8:00 am to 4:00 PM, why don’t you want me here until 10:00 am?”

“This is a government job”, the interviewer says. “For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that.”

A man in northern Minnesota woke up one morning to find a bear on his roof.

He looked in the Yellow Pages, and sure enough, there was an ad for “Up North Bear Removers.”

He called the number listed and the bear remover said he’d be over within an hour.

The bear remover arrived, and got out of his van. He had a ladder, a baseball bat, a 12 gauge shotgun, and a mean looking, heavily scarred old pit bull.

“What are you going to do?” the homeowner asked.

“I’m going to put this ladder up against the roof, and then I’m going to go up there, and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat. When the bear falls off the roof, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles, and not let go. The bear will then be subdued enough for me to put him in the cage in the back of the van.”

He then handed the shotgun to the homeowner.

“What’s the shotgun for?” the homeowner asked.

“If the bear knocks me off the roof, you shoot the dog.”

I want to live my next life backwards: You start out dead and get that out of the way.

Then you wake up in a nursing home feeling better every day.

Then you get kicked out for being too healthy.

Enjoy your retirement and collect your pension.

Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day.

You work 40 years until you’re too young to work.

You get ready for High School: drink alcohol, party, and you’re generally promiscuous.

Then you go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, and you have no responsibilities.

Then you become a baby, and then...

You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in Spa-like conditions - Central heating, room service on tap, and then...

You finish off as an orgasm. I rest my case The warmth and heart wrenching simplicity of Australian poetry can bring a tear to the eye.

Australia is blessed to have such an abundant wealth of talented story tellers through whom future generations can learn of their history and 21st century lifestyle.

Here is a classical example: *A Poem About Tomatoes* I know a Muslim whose name is Jim, I really love throwing tomatoes at him, Tomatoes are soft & don’t hurt the skin, But these fuckers do, cos they’re still in the tin A devout Arab Muslim entered a black cab in London.

He curtly asked the cabbie to turn off the radio because as decreed by his religious teaching, he must not listen to music because in the time of the prophet there was no music, especially Western music which is the music of the infidel.

The cab driver politely switched off the radio, stopped the cab and opened the door.

The Arab Muslim asked him, “What are you doing?”

The cabbie answered, “In the time of the prophet there were no taxis, so piss off and wait for a camel.”

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 KPH. He says to himself: “This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!” So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over.

Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies - two in the front seat and three in the back wide eyed and white as ghosts.

The driver, obviously confused, Financing Avaliable says to him “Officer, I don’t understand, I was doing exactly the speed Family Owned & Operated limit! What seems to be the prob Since 1958 lem?”

“Ma’am,” the officer replies, “you weren’t speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers.”

519-825-4222

Over 100 used

Wheatley,

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 60

July 11th- 5th Annual Lisle Legion Show & Shine

Continued from Page 5

June 27th- 1st Annual Moose Riders St Catharines Show& Shine/Dice Run

92 Permilla St. St. Catharines, $20 Entry Free, Breakfast starts at 9am, 50/50 Draws, Horseshoe Pit, Free Camping, and The Music Starts at 7pm with The Brant Parker Blues Band, for more information contact 905-682-7207

At the Legion 8439 Main St West in Lisle, Registration starts at 10am, Lots of classes to choose from, Live Music, BBQ, 50/50, All on the Largest patio in Ontario. Everyone Welcome. More Info call 705-424-2995 or email lisle.legion@gmail.com

July 11th- Aces & Eights – Christmas in July Toy Ride

June 27th- Lucan Harley Pulls

Meeting at Durham CAS, 1320 Airport Blvd. Oshawa.

Registration starts at 9am One Toy per Bike Required for Registration, ending at Kawartha Bikers Church Annual Show and Shine1000 fairbairn St., Peterborough. Food, Draws, Live Music, Classes for All Bikes,

June 27th- Jacox Harley-Davidson® Rides to Bala, Ontario

July 12th- Welland County M.C. Lime Run

At the Lucan Community Centre, The Excitement starts at 5:30pm. For more details check www.hogtowncycles.ca Departing at 9:00am from Jacox Harley-Davidson®. Please RSVP our Marketing & Promotions Coordinator, Julie Martin at jmartin@jacoxharley.com or at 905-858-6763 by Friday June 26th.

June 28th- Merrickville Bike Show

Watch The Rider’s Mag Eastern Ontario on Facebook for more details.

June 28th- Run to the North Wall XX

Check their website for details www.WellandMotorcycleClub.com

July 17th- 19th- Wasaga Beach Motorcycle Rally To get the full rundown of events check out www.wasagabeachrally.com

THE FINAL FRONTIER

Staging at Royal Canadian Legion Br. 594, 5030 Howard Ave Tecumseh, from 9-11am, Run leaves at 11:30 Sharp for arrival at The North Wall for the 12 Noon Service, Open House to follow at Legion Br. 143, 1570 Marentette Ave. For more Info: 519256-6797 Brought to you by...

July

July 1st- Malicious Cycle’s Poker Run

25TH ANNIVERSARY

July 31st - August 3rd - 2015

ABATE OF ONTARIO INC.

“The Canada Day Ride!”

Meeting at The Rangers MC Clubhouse, 101 Union St. Toronto, Registration 11am a $10 donation, Kickstands-Up at Noon, Ride ending at Malicious Cycle’s Bike Night, 3595 St. Clair Ave. East, Scarborough. For more information call Bryan at 416-666-5827

July 4 - Lincoln County M.C. Harley-Davidson Show & Shine

FRIDAY

9:00 - 1:00

th

At the L.C.M.C. Clubhouse, 4859 Hillside Dr. Beamsville. Gates open at Noon, Judging at 3:00pm, Awards at 4:30. $10 per entry, Trophies for the Winners. More Info: 905-563-4267 or email lcmc1967@hotmail.com

July 4th- Brant Artillery Gunners Club ‘Blues for Soldiers

Two locations The Gunners Club, 115 Henry St. Brantford and Brando’s, 135 Market St. Brantford.

The Live Music starts at 2pm and goes until Dusk.

Admission $10

July5th- Bacchus MC Chatham Annual Bike Show

At Big Shots Billiards, 17 King Street in Chatham.

Registration starts at 11am until Noon. All Makes and Models are Welcome, For Details call 306-2027522

Colin Amey

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

7:00 - 10:30

11:00 - 1:00

11:00 - 1:00

6:00 - 11:00

Ribbed

Willy Styles

High Water Revival Siagon Pharmacy

*Camping *Wet T-Shirt Contest *Bike Games *Mud Wrestling *Show & Shine *Tattoo Artist *Food Vendors *Leather Vendors All Day & Weekend Passes Available Now !

No Glass, No Pets, No Attitudes, No One Under 19 Permitted Information and Media Inquires

Surf (519) 282-2978 / Chico (519) 477-4365 or Horse (519) 983-5324

July 11th- Hogtown Cycles “Baconfest”

Lucan, Ontario. Everything Bacon and Bikes, All day event Starting at 10am, Vendors, Live Music, Walking Poker Run an Bacon and More!

More info at www.hogtowncycles.ca

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 61

August

July 31st – Aug 3rd- A.B.A.T.E Ontario’s 25th Annual Final Frontier

MGK ENGLISH-FRENCH TRANSLATION SERVICES

At the ABATE Grounds. Live Bands All Weekend, Camping, Bike Games, Show & Shine, Vendors, Mud Wrestling, Wet T-Shirt. For tickets Call Surf: 519-282-2978, Chico: 519-4774365, or Horse: 519-983-5324.

manon.kellman@bell.net Certificate in Translation from The University of Toronto www.mgkenglish-frenchtranslationservices.com

Aug. 7th-9th- Big Daddy’s Cowpaddy’s 4th Annual Rodeo & Roast

M GK 519-835-8488

11101 County Rd. 15, North Augusta. Advanced tickets $25, $30 at the Gate. For more Information:call Greg or Susie at 613-926-0799 or www.BigDaddysCowpaddy.ca

Aug. 8th- Bikes On Bond

Downtown Oshawa is closing the Core area to Motorcycles Only, All Day, Live Music, Vendors, and a Free Show & Shine.

This is a Free Event and Everyone is Welcome. For more info www.facebook.com/pages/Bikes-on-Bond . Rain Date Aug 9th.

Guelph, Ontario

July 17th- 19th- Ride Manitoulin Motorcycle Rally

Providence Bay Fairgrounds, Manitoulin Island. Poker Run, Camping,Show and Shine, Biker Games and Live Music.

More Info at www.ridemanitoulin.ca

Aug. 30th- Critter & Black Gold’s Annual Show ‘N’ Shine for Alzheimer’s July 17 & 18 - Big Brothers Big Sisters St. Catharines Join The Mag Crew at 1228 Gorham St. in Newmarket for – Thorold ‘Ride For Kids Sake’ th

th

A weekend with Tig (Kim Coates) & Bobby (Mark Boone Jr) Friday evening Dinner and Wine pairing at Chateau des Charmes Winery in Niagara on the Lake and on Saturday The Charity Ride. Starting at The Pen Centre 221 Glendale Ave., St Catharines, registration starts at 8:30am. More info at www.bbbsmentors.ca

the day and Enter your Bike to Win. Trophies for All Classes, BBQ and Live Music. Starting at 10am and going till 5pm.

See you there

140 King St., Mount Forest. 11am Start, Free Rregistration, with Judging at 2pm and Awards at 2:30, BBQ, 50/50, Beer Tent for more info call 519-323-1570 or email rclmtforest134@ wightman.ca or check www.mountforestfireworks.ca

space now! Check it out at www.wharfratrally.com

September

Sept. 2nd – 6th- Wharf Rat Rally

Digby Nova Scotia, All Week Long Atlantic Canada’s Largest

July 18th- 9th Annual Mount Forest Legion Show & Shine Motorcycle Rally. Events going all week long. Book your Sept 5th- The Annual Snake River Motorcycle Rodeo

468A Faught Road in Cobden, Gates open at 9am, $20 per person, Bike Games on and off All Day, Live Music, Camping and of course The Pig Roast. For more Info Check out facebook @ Snake River Motorcycle Rodeo or Call Andrew at 613-808-1388

July 18 - 3 Annual Motorcycle Ride for Autism Ottawa th

rd

Starts and Finishes at Kunstadt Sports, 462 Hazeldean Rd. in Kanata, Registration starts at 8am Ride Kicks off at 9:15am.

For more information check out www.motorcyclerideforautismottawa.com

Sept. 13th- Welland County M.C. Family Fun Day

July 18 - Welland County M.C. Fun Day at the Club th

Check their website for details www.WellandMotorcycleClub.com

Check their website for details www.WellandMotorcycleClub.com

Sept. 26th- Big Daddy’s Cowpaddy’s 4th Annual Toy Run 5189 Concession Road 5 North, Amherstburg. Gates open at July 18th- Queensmen M.C. Bandfest 2015

Details to be announced. call Greg or Susie at 613-926-0799or www.BigDaddysCowpaddy.ca

3:00 pm, Non-stop Music from 4:30pm till Midnight, Tickets $15 in advance $20 at the door, Contact a club member ion.

R

Digby, Nova Scotia

September 2 – 6, 2015

...a quiet seaside town....transformed by thousands of motorcycles....for five days in september.

BE THERE!

www.wharfratrally.com

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 62

INJURED IN A MOTORCYCLE ACCIDENT Mackesy Smye LAWYERS

“Riding these motorcycles is my life long hobby, but representing motorcycle accident victims and obtaining full justice for them is my passion”David F. Smye Q.C. CALL AND ARRANGE YOUR FREE CONSULTATION

905-525-2341 maclaw@mackesysmye.com

Mackesy Smye LAWYERS

THE PERSONAL INJURY EXPERTS.

TM