The Queer Chronicle - July 2012

TQC Issue 3 . Volume 11 . India

special feature

THE A-TO-Z OF PARTIES, COPS & YOUR RIGHTS

the greyline

UN-SETTLE awareness campaign

PROTECT YOUR LOVE event in pix

KASHISH MIQFF 2012 - PART DEUX for your coffee table

THE VELVET RAGE 18+

HIP RS E + AD RE IN 25 ES RI NT U CO

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in this

ISSUE 2

20

special feature THE A-TO-Z OF PARTIES, COPS & YOUR RIGHTS

for your coffee table THE VELVET RAGE

7

24

awareness campaign PROTECT YOUR LOVE

the after party with MARY J BLIGE

8

26

the greyline UN-SETTLE

the morning after LAMB GOULASH

12

event in pix KASHISH MIQFF 2012 - PART DEUX

16

the winners KASHISH MIQFF 2012

TQC Exclusive AN INTERVIEW WITH PARIKSHITH

18

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29

List of LGBT friendly psychiatrists, HIV/AIDS councelors, STD specialists & sexologists in India

events, advertisements & PROMOTIONS

editor’s pick POEM TO A FATHER, FROM HIS SON

TQC. Issue 3. Volume 11. India. ;<' )9$%$ ' 7<' >")97>8' 1' ;P' 97@7>8' K%"P' NP$'K"%'P$T'2;K$D6'7>')9$'4D"<$)G'1'B<$@' )"'9;)$ 'D7#7>8';'@"BCD$'D7K$';P">8<)'P6' 97PT Cover photograph by4"BD@'>$#$%' PRASHANT SAMTANI. Model: TANISH RAJPURE K%7$>@<T'1' 8$)' )"'C$'*9"'1' !"#7' c"' 6"B' %$8%$)' 6"B%' @$47<7">' 7>' %$;DD6'*;<T'/#$>)B;DD6'*9$>'P6'P")9$%' ;>6'*;6r 4;P$')"'+>"*')9;)'1' Editor & publisher: Keith | Contributors: 093;Q':;5:7' ASAAP I"' 1' (Canada), Ashish Dutta, GayBombay, Ishaan / Desiboys.in, Kashish *;<' 8;6G' <9$ ' 8;#$' “Dad I'll say this, @">L)' %$8%$)' P6' P$' Parikshith )9$' 4">[@$>4$' MIQFF, MINGLE, S, Shourya. @ $ 4 7 < 7 " > T' 1 ) L <' I'm still & will ; > @' 4 " B % ; 8 $' ) "'

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your #$%6'5%"B@' "K' ;>@' 1' Layout concept, design production: Keith. $PC%;4$'P6'& D7K$ ';< '1' always be *;>)$@'7)')"'C$T'(<';' son but I’m gay.” ;P' 9;556' )9;)' P6' TQC (The Queer Chronicle) is India’s longest running free monthly e-magazine published for and by the queer community in India. This +7@G' P6' @;@' ;>@' 1' 5 ; % $ > ) <' 9 ; # $' *$%$' %$;DD6' 4D"<$G' CB)' "#$%' )9$ ' 6$;%<' ;44$5)$@'P$'K"%'*9"'1';PT'=6'5;%$>)<' e-zine is a non-commercial publication, is not for sale and is exclusively for private distribution. Views expressed are solely the opinions *$'@%7f$@';5;%)';>@'*$'D"<)')9$ 'K;)9$%Q P$;>')9$' *"%D@')"' P$T'1' ;P' )9;>+KBD' <">'%$D;N"><975')9;)'*$'9;@T' '=6'@;@' K"%')9$' SB;D7N$< ')9$6' 9;#$' 7><NDD$@' 7>' of the individual authors and do not necessarily represent the opinions of the editorial team of TQC, nor its affiliates. The content of this ;D*;6<' );B89)' P$ ' )"' C$' 9">$<)' ;>@' P$G' K"%' )9$7%' <B55"%)' ;>@' 1' 9"5$ ' )"' 7>' *9;)$#$%' 4;P$' 1' P;+$')9$P'5%"B@T The appearance of any person in this ezine, is not to be taken as any indication of the e-zine may not beK%;>+' suitable for P6'all*;6T'audiences. %$<5$4)'97P';>@';P'#$%6'%"")$@')"'97<' !"#7'c"'6"B'9;#$ ';>6';@#74$'K"%'<"P$' ' ;>@' 5%7>475D$<T' ]7>;DD6' ;' K$*'TQC sexual orientation P"%;D< of such persons. copyrights of photographs / images and ensures that due credit of the sources of "K' "B%'respects 4"PPB>7)6' *9"'the ;%$ ' <NDD' *$$+< ';8"G' 1'@$47@$@')"' )$DD'97P')9;)'1' 4">)$P5D;N>8')9$'@$47<7">'"K' J4"P7>8' these are mentioned. *;<'8;6T'1'*%")$';'5"$P ';>@'9;>@$@'7)' "B)Lr )"'97P'FB<)';<'9$'*;<'D$;#7>8'K"%'*"%+' 093;Q':;5:7'2);6')%B$')"'6"B%'5%7>475D$<' www.thequeerchronicle.com, www.facebook.com/tqc.india, www.planetromeo.com/tqc_india, TheQueerChronicle@gmail.com s';>@')9$>' <;)'C6' P6'4$DD' 59">$';>@' ;>@'4"P$')"')$%P< ')9;)'7)'7<'dkni'D7K$T' 9"5$@'K"%')9$'C$<)\'

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1

SPECIAL FEATURE

THE A-TO-Z COPS &

2

TQC

OF PARTIES, YOUR RIGHTS

JUL12

3

A

ALCOHOL The$secondary$aspect$of$minors,$isif$ anything$alcoholic$is$being$served$ to$them.$Anyone$below$21$years$(in$ Maharashtra)$cannot$consume$

D

alcohol.$Also$itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s$a$problem$if$a$

DEALING.WITH.THE.POLICE It$is$really$important$not$to$get$ nervous.$Without$getting$aggressive,$ be$firm$about$your$position.$The$cops$ would$respect$you$too.$If$you$are$ asked$to$get$into$a$van$without$a$

minor$has$drunk$outside$and$come$to$a$party.$

reason,$if$you$are$a$lawyer$or$a$journalist$mention$

Drunken$behavior$in$a$place$after$drinking$can$be$a$

the$fact.$Also$do$not$verbally$abuse$a$policeman$as$

pretext$for$a$raid.$

you$may$be$charged$with$a$false$case$of$obstruction$ of$justice.

B

BAIL In$an$overwhelming$majority$of$

DRESS

cases$related$to$parties,$if$arrested,$

There$is$no$law$against$crossKdressing$or$drag.$

bail$is$your$right.$Recently$at$a$

However$discrimination$and$humiliation$of$guys$in$

party$people$were$arrested$for$

drag$does$happen$at$a$police$station.$They$could$

obscenity$and$Rs.$1250$charged$as$

single$out$guys$wearing$makeKup.

bail.$The$most$important$thing$is$to$not$panic.$If$you$ are$not$an$organizer,$let$them$interact$with$the$police $

DRINKING.PERMITS

and$just$stay$away.$Don't$argue$with$the$cops.$In$a$

You$can$obtain$a$permit$to$drink$if$you$are$over$21,$

heated$argument$people$may$tend$to$get$violent$and$$

and$hard$alcohol$if$over$25.$Getting$a$permit$has$

the$last$thing$you$want$is$to$hit$a$policeman.$The$case $

become$fairly$easy$now.$A$lifetime$permit$costs$a$Rs$

against$you$then$becomes$nonKbailable$for$

1000$at$larger$wine$shops.$You$only$need$2$passport$

obstructing$and$assaulting$a$policeman$while$on$

sized$photographs$and$a$photo$ID$proof$of$age.$You$

duty.$That's$what$happened$in$a$recent$case.$If$you$

would$also$be$letKoff$sooner$in$case$of$a$police$raid.$A$

speak$the$local$language$(Marathi$in$Mumbai),$it$

few$venues$provide$daily$permits,$but$they$are$only$

makes$a$huge$difference.

valid$till$midnight.$If$traveling$to$another$state,$ remember$that$permits$are$statewise,$but$you$can$

BACKGROUND.CHECKS.BY.COMPANIES

show$your$state$permit$and$get$a$visitor's$daily$

On$background$check,$verification$companies$

permit.

working$on$behalf$of$corporate$clients$have$filed$ (major/minor)$discrepancy$reports$based$on$a$case$

DRUGS

filed$at$a$local$police$station.$Background$verification$

The$other$major$problem$is$presence$of$drugs,$the$

companies$having$access$to$civil$data$and$police$

possibility$of$which$provide$a$pretext$or$reason$for$

station$or$high$court$data$is$relevant.$

raids.$If$drugs$are$found$at$a$party,$all$may$be$taken$ into$custody$and$can$be$made$to$undergo$an$

C

CLOSING.TIME

examination.$That$is$the$law.$If$the$drugs$are$on$the$

If$you$are$at$a$venue$drinking$at$3am$

premises,$they$will$have$to$do$the$test.

which$is$not$supposed$to$serve$after$ 1am,$by$law$the$organizer$or$owner$ should$be$charged.$However,$being$ ignorant$of$law$is$not$an$excuse.$Besides$

aiding$and$abetting$a$crime$is$wrong.

4

F

FARMHOUSE.PARTIES As$long$as$there$is$an$entry/cover$charge$ for$parties,$even$a$private$farmhouse$ party$is$subject$to$the$same$rules$as$that$

TQC

for$a$public$venue.

premises?$Yes,$if$they$have$a$suspicion$of$a$ cognizable$offence.$You$cannot$have$more$than$

FIGHTS

certain$decibel$of$music$postK10pm,$even$if$being$

Outside$the$venue$of$the$party$the$organizers$nor$the $

played$in$your$house.$Hence$be$on$good$terms$with$

venue$do$not$have$any$responsibilities.$Inside$the$

your$neighbors.

venue$the$bouncers$of$the$club$take$over.

NIGHT.TIME.ARRESTS

G

GROUP.RESPONSIBILITY

If$a$person$is$found$with$a$houseKbreaking$tool,$and$

If$you$have$a$friend$who$really$gets$

cannot$explain$why$he$is$carrying$it,$he$can$be$

drunk,$don't$abandon$them,$instead$

arrested.$

try$and$control$them.$In$general,$do$ not$abandon$your$friends$and$take$ care$of$them$at$parties.$Be$

responsible$and$make$sure$a$nonKdrinking$person$is$ driving.

H

P

HOOK7UPS

PERMISSIONS Parties,$drinking,$dancing,$is$legal.$ Having$a$party$at$home$or$a$venue$is$ legal,$provided$all$permissions$have$ been$taken.$Problems$arise$if$the$ permissions$are$not$in$place,$thus$

If$you$pick$up$someone$at$a$party$

putting$all$attendees$at$risk.$The$organizers$should$

and$bring$them$home,$put$

make$a$list$of$permissions$and$display$these$at$

everything$under$lock$and$key.$

entrance$to$people$attending.$Basic$permits$are$

Inform$a$friend$about$whom$you$are$

excise,$police,$DJ$(DJ$and$premises$separate),$dance$

taking$home,$and$take$a$picture$of$

floor;$very$important.$Also$there$are$PPL$license,$etc.

them$and$email$it$from$your$phone$to$the$friend.

As$far$as$the$difference$between$a$house$and$a$public$ party$is$concerned:$Liquor$permit,$excise$permit$to$

M

MAKING.OUT

serve$alcohol$for$more$than$10$persons,$is$required.$

Making$out$in$a$party$could$fall$

But$normally$the$cops$donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t$show$up$unless$there$is$a $

under$obscenity,$since$it$has$not$

a$complaint$of$disturbance$from$a$neighbour.$Party$

been$defined."

organisers$are$now$event$managers.$Do$a$bit$of$ research$on$the$background$of$the$organizers,$if$they$

MEDIA The$role$of$the$media$creates$a$sensation,$and$

are$in$hospitality$or$events,$people$with$no$ background$or$whom$you$don't$know$could$be$dicey.

footage$may$be$put$on$websites$and$channels.$In$ some$cases,$it$gives$the$the$police$a$great$kick$to$do$ this$as$they$are$sometimes$hand$in$glove$with$the$ media.$Sensitizing$them$is$required.$The$best$way$is$ to$identify$official$spokespersons$and$other$media$ persons$from$within$the$community$

N JUL12

who$would$be$able$to$negotiate$peerK toKpeer.

R

RAIDS Distribution$of$liquor$without$permit$ or$to$minors$or$drugs$can$lead$to$a$ raid.$Drinking$without$permit$drinking$ is$a$minimal$sentence.$House$parties$ by$and$large$are$not$raided.$Someone$

raiding$a$party$may$say$they$got$a$call,$which$may$be$ undefined$and$could$be$a$pretext.$Under$95$of$

NEIGHBORS

prohibition$act,$someone$conducting$a$vexatious$raid$

Do$the$police$have$a$right$to$enter$any$

can$be$brought$under$vexatious$search$and$seizure.$

5

Supposing$there$is$nothing$illegal$and$you$had$all$

drugs,$please$inform$the$organizer$as$you$would$be$

permissions$and$still$raided,$it$may$be$construed$as$a$

saving$yourself$and$other$guests$a$lot$of$trouble.

vexatious$raid.$30Kodd$licenses$are$required$to$host$a$ party$at$a$venue.$Even$the$organizer$at$a$house$party$ can$be$arrested$without$permit$for$alcohol,$and$a$bill$ should$be$present.$Backup$plan$for$a$raid?$K$Don't$ panic,$be$firm$but$not$aggressive.$Keep$at$least$Rs$ 1500$with$you$just$in$case$you$are$fined$for$whatever$

V

reason.$Make$sure$you$have$a$number$of$family$or$ friend$to$call$up.

VALUABLES You$are$responsible$for$everything$ that$you$carry.$If$they$are$providing$ lockers$then$its$different.$Often$ people$who$have$had$things$stolen$at$ gay$parties$go$to$the$police,$but$

remember$that$you$are$bringing$exposure$if$you$are$ not$out.

RIGHTS You$should$know$why$you$are$being$arrested$(the$

VENUE

charge).$You$have$the$right$to$call$a$lawyer.$Diaries$

Your$behavior$outside$the$venue$could$pose$a$

are$to$be$maintained,$where$you$were$taken$in.$You$

problem.$More$than$5$people$on$a$street$consuming$

need$to$insist$on$calling$someone,$even$before$being$

liquor$or$drunk$is$problematic.$The$organizers$would$

taken$into$a$van.$But$charges$will$be$filed$only$once$

not$be$responsible.

you$have$gone$to$the$police$station.$If$arrested$on$ Saturday$night,$the$release$depends$on$offense$being$

IN.CONCLUSION....

bailable,$you$have$to$be$released$within$a$few$hours$

The$party$scene$is$now$bigger$than$ever.$Hence$there $

because$there$is$always$a$night$magistrate$or$holiday$

is$no$reason$for$mass$hysteria.$However,$it$is$

magistrate.$You$can$yourself$apply$for$bail$but$always $

important$to$be$well$informed,$aware$of$your$rights$

good$to$have$a$lawyer.$There$are$various$types$of$

and$responsibilities,$the$law$of$the$land,$and$

bails$K$$cash$bail,$surety$bail$and$PR$bond.

ultimately$to$keep$yourself$and$the$community$safe.

KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

S

SOCIAL.MEDIA

Credits:)This)article)has)been)adapted)from)the)

"Its$not$advisable$to$advertise$parties$on $

official)event)report)‘GAY)BOMBAY)SPECIAL)SUNDAY)

PR$etc.$At$the$cybercrime$cell,$there$are$

MEET:)PARTYING)AND)POLICING’,)anchored)by)Vijay)

constables$given$job$to$look$at$every$

Hiremath.

website$and$what’s$going$on$there.$Even$ the$high$court$has$directed$to$

Vijay)Hiremath)is)a)lawyer)who)has)done)workshops)

investigate$at$social$media.$What$you$say$on$FB$and$

for)Gay)Bombay)over)the)years.)Several)LGBT)people)

Twitter,$you$have$to$be$very$careful$about.$People$

have)consulted)him)for)legal)advice.)He)has)

are$realizing$that$social$media$are$not$as$private$as$

responded)to)urgent)legal)problems)with)sound,)onQ

they$think.$Be$careful$of$what$you$put$out$as$it$can$be$

theQground)help.)He)has)provided)emergency)support,)

used$against$you.

for)example)an)important)cases)of)runaways.)He)has) years)of)practical)experience)of)working)with)the)

SMOKING

police)Q)apart)from)strictly)law,)the)socioQcultural)

Smoking$inside$the$venue$creates$a$pretext$for$

aspects)and)reality)of)working)with)the)police:)how)to)

prosecution,$problem$for$the$venue$since$they$didn't$

talk)to),)who)is)important,)how)to)deal)with)

prevent$it.$Please$ask$smokers$to$go$out.$If$you$see$

situations.)Principally)talk)about)Bombay)Police)act) and)Prohibition)act.

6

TQC

TQC

AWARENESS CAMPAIGN

Protect your love

The$Alliance$for$South$Asian$AIDS$Prevention$(ASAAP)$serves$South$Asian$ populations$in$the$Greater$Toronto$Area,$including$its$surrounding$suburbs$and$ regions.$We$offer$health$promotion$and$support$for$South$Asians$living$with$and$ affected$by$HIV$and$work$with$diverse$communities$on$prevention$education.

Our$programs$and$services$are$delivered$in$culturally$appropriate$ways$while$ simultaneously$challenging$the$discomfort$many$have$in$talking$about$sexuality$ and$sexual$health.

To$learn$how$you$can$help,$please$visit$www.asaap.ca

JUL12

7

THE GREYLINE

I$ bought$ a $ coat$ last$ winter.$ It$ is $ very$ beautiful,$ although $not$very$warm,$not$the $best$cloth,$but$yes,$ beautiful.$When $you$get$hooked$up $with$something$ so$ pretty,$ you $ tend$ to $ compromise $ on$ the $ other$ features.$That’s $how$it$works $isn’t$it?$Life$teaches $us$ that$ compromising$ is $one$ of$ the $key$ things $to$ be$ learnt$ on $ our$ path$ of$ growing$ up.$ First$ it$ comes$ instinctively,$ then$ thoughtfully$ and $ one $ day…it’s $a$ habit.$ When$ I$ was $ growing$ up,$ I$ was $ taught$ that$ compromising$in $life $is $a $good$thing,$since $you$can’t$ get$everything$you $want.$And$I$saw $people $practice$ that$ too;$ family,$ friends…everyone$ compromised,$ sometimes $a $lot,$ other$ times $a $little $less.$ In $fact,$ I$ learnt$that$compromising,$if$not$learnt,$will$make $me$ end$up$losing$a$lot$of$things$I$might$have$a$shot$at.

Every$ relationship$ in $ life $ is $ tested$ with $ situations$ where $the $best$and$the$worst$of$people$are $brought$ out.$ Every$ relationship $has $tests $of$compromise.$ In$ relationships,$we $are$told$that$compromising$is $a $key$ feature;$ its $helps $make $the$relationship $work.$True.$ It’s $like $that$day$in $school,$when$standing$across $the$ road $my$ friend$asked$me $to $cross $over$and$I$asked$ her) to$cross $over.$ In $the $end,$ I $suggested$ that$ we$ both) meet$ halfway,$ which$ we $ did$ with $ laughing$ faces.$That$one $tiny$act$meant$a $lot$more $then$just$a$ funny$episode…it$is $one$of$the $most$precious $lesson$I$ carry$with$me…

6 8

TQC

6 JUL12

TQC 9

Lately$ this $ thought$ came$ to$ me:$ if$ one$ p e r s o n $ c o m p r o m i s e s $ m o r e $ i n$ a$ relationship,$ is $ it$ because $ they$ don’t$ wanna $seem$selfish,$or$scared$that$if$they$ take $a $moment$to $think$about$their)needs$ they$would $be $left$with$a $can$of$chocolate$ ice $cream,$and$watching$“New $Years $Eve”$ all $by$themselves $wondering$if$love$would$ ever$knock$again?$Or$maybe $thinking$that$ this $ is $ what$ it$ is,$ and$ to$ silently$ keep$ settling$in$for$our$partners$demands $over$ and $over,$and $in $action$giving$up$some$of$ the $ more $ crucial $ things $ we$ want$ in $ a$ relationship $because $we $just$cant$bear$the$ thought$of$ending$up$alone$and $unKloved?$ Especially$ in$ gayKrelationships…do$ we$ settle $more $because $we $know$ we$ don’t$ have $a $plethora $of$choice $out$there?$Not$ wanting$ to$ go $ out$ of$ our$ comfort$ zone$ and $ keep $ taking$ it$ in$ as $ one $ partner$ makes $it$ more$ about$ himself?$ $ Because$ we$take$it$for$ granted$(a $little $too$much)$ that$ all $the$ items $on $ the $ check$ list$ can$ never$ be $crossed $out$ and$settle$in$to$be$ taken$for$granted$instead…$ Then$ we$ try$ and$ communicate$ to $ the$ partner,$ make $ him/her$ see $ sense $ but$ sometimes $its $not$that$the $other$person$is$ not$capable$of$keeping$you$happy$ if$they$ try,$ sometimes…they$ would$rather$ make$ themselves$happy$over$and$over.$ When$we$settle $a $lot$in $a $relationship,$we$ lose$ who$ we $ are$ and$ what$ we$ want$ because $we $are $trying$so$hard$to $be $some$ body$ else’s $idea $of$perfect.)They$ say$that$ in $a $relationship,$there$is $always $one $who$ is $more $of$a $giver.$It’s $ironic$how$the$idea$ of$equality$is$propagated$yet$customized.$

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TQC

Compromising,$ like $ the $ want$ to$ be$ together,$ is $ a $ two $ way$ street.$ It’s $ a$ healthy$ medicine,$ an $ amazing$ pacifier.$ Settling$is $not.$ And$settling$in$everything$ you$want$absolutely$disastrous.$We $might$ tell $ourselves $that$we$do$it$out$of$“selfless$ love”,$ or$ “to $make $it$work”.$ But$ make $it$ work$for$whom?$You?$Him?$Or$the$“Us”?$ And $ sometimes $ when$ you$ come $ to $ the$ realization$that$you $cant$spend$the $rest$of$ your$life $giving)in)to$a $person $who$refuses$ to$bend,)no $matter$how$scary$the $idea,$its$ better$to $let$go.$The $thought$of$going$back$ to$where $you$started,$to $let$go $of$a$person$ you$ have $been$ speaking$ to$ every$ day$ of$ the $last$year…to $go$back$to$being$single,$is$ very$ scary…but$unless $you$let$ go$of$what$ you$don’t$want,$how$will $you$make$space$ for$something$you$do?$ My$ coat$ still$looks $pretty,$but$ it’s $not$me$ and $I$don’t$wear$it.$But$it$will$always $serve$ as $ a $ reminder$ of$ how$ sometimes $ we$ neglect$ourselves $just$when$we $think$that$ we$ are$ making$ the $ best$ choice$ for$ us.$$ And $ now$ when$ I$ shop,$ I $know$ that$ if$ a$ better$coat$comes $along…I $do$have$space$ for$it$in$my$closet…

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EVENT IN PIX

Kashish MIQFF Part Deux May 2012. Mumbai Photos courtesy Kashish MIQFF

JUN12 JUL12

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Kashish MIQFF The Winners RIYAD WADIA AWARD FOR BEST EMERGING INDIAN FILMMAKER THE NIGHT IS YOUNG (Raat Baaki) directed by Pradipta Ray The jury presents the 2012 Riyad Wadia Award for Best Emerging Indian Filmmaker to Pradipta Ray for 'Raat Baki' which in eight short minutes presents a surprisingly complex narrative of sex and sexuality, humour and humanity, but which draws attention as well to the stigma and discrimination LGBT people face in our society, all in a tightly edited and competently acted package.

BEST DOCUMENTARY SHORT

ARE WE SO DIFFERENT (Aamra Ki Etoi Bhinno) directed by Lok Prakash The best film in the Documentary Shorts category goes to Lok Prakash's ‘Are We So Different (Aamra Ki Etoi Bhinno)’ from Bangladesh. A phenomenally sensitive documentary on the gay community of Bangladesh, the film speaks from the heart, and reveals stories of sheer courage and deep hurt. It's a bold account of men and transgenders fighting for space in a completely patriarchal society. This is as true for India as it is true for Bangladesh and so many cultures where we've forgotten to celebrate differences between us that make us all

16

special in our own ways. The characters in the film bare their souls before the camera. What you're left is a film that is as unique as its courageous protagonists.

BEST DOCUMENTARY FE

ATURE

LET THE BUTTERFLIES FL Y (Chittegalu Haradali) direct ed

by Gopal Menon The best film award in the cat egory Documentary Feature goes to Gopal Menon's ‘Let The Butterflies Fly (Chittegalu Haradali)’ from India.

Following the story of a youn g Shilpa from the hijra community, wh o was force to undergo a thorough ly sexchange operation by the Bang alore police, the film is a stunning expose on how the state that is entruste d with the powers to protect us uses its might instead to suppress the margi nalised.

The film also reveals a bitter truth that we've always sort of known but rarely seen -- how a sensationalist media is in fact a tool that the police us e to plant stories, spread rumours and serve personal agendas. This is a po werful film that we believe should be watched by all of us, so the message spr eads and various Shilpas of this world eventually find justice. We ho pe the courts will listen too.

KASHISH COFFEE BREAK ONLINE AUIDIENCE AWARD LOGGING OUT directed by Nakshatra This film from India, received 426 views, 103 comments and 4 1/2 star rating, making it the winner of the online competition.

TQC

BEST NARRATIVE FEATURE MY LAST ROUND (Mi Ultimo Rounde) directed by Julio Jorquera Arriagada The jury has by a majority vote decided to give the award for best narrative feature to “My Last Round” from Chile / Argentina, directed by Julio Arriagada. The film is skilfully, written, acted and directed and breaks stereotypes in a quiet, sensitive manner. The subject, the handling and the emotions stay with you long after the film is over.

SPECIAL JURY M ENTION FOR NARR ATIVE FE ATURE

WE THE OUTSID ERS... (Aamhi K a Tisre...) directe d by Ramesh Laxman More The jury would al so to make a spec ial mention for Rames h Laxman's More' s Marathi film 'We Th e Outsiders'. This is a rare movie in an Indian language th at speaks from the he art about a community in Indi a that even as per law is left alone to roams around the streets without an identity, without any social security , and without the care and respect th at everyone in ou r society deserves.

An absolutely entertaining mov ie, 'We The Outsid ers (Aamhi Ka Tisre) ' gives a voice to th e third gender and deserves the sam e applause here as it got at its world premiere at this fe stival.

Winners list & film writeup courtesy Kashish MIQFF

JUL12

BEST INTERNATIONAL NARRARTIVE SHORT

THROUGH THE WINDOW (Me’ever La’chalon) directed by Chen Shumowitz Best film in the category of Narrative Shorts goes to Chen Shumowitz's ‘Through The Window’ from Israel. This is 12-minute movie that manages to effectively drive home a point over two scenes what most movies don't manage in over two hours. A mother notices her daughter from her window, kissing another girl. That's it. Just this moment, and you have a film with hardly any dialogues, but emotions and performances that leave you stunned by its simplicity and brevity of thought.

It's a remarkable achievement in filmmaking, and was a unanimous choice for the best film award in its category.

FOR SPECIAL JURY AWARD E DOCUMENTARY FEATUR

ted by Jeff RITES OF PASSAGE direc Roy an The jury would like to make ff Roy's honourable mention for Je United ‘Rites Of Passage’ from the elling story, States of America. A comp res the sharply told, the film captu d pains that inner dilemmas, doubts an es through 40-year-old Maya Jaffer go ngkok to while on her journey to Ba ent surgery. undergo a gender realignm It's easy to like this deeply t easy being personalised movie. It's no Maya. Of Maya. We must give it up for for this TQC course, we must give it up wonderful film.

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EDITOR’S PICK

TQC - MAY 2010

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your business Established$in$September$2009,$TQC$is$India’s$longest$running$ monthly$eKmagazine$published$for$and$by$the$queer$ community$in$India.$Being$an$online$publication$we$have$the$ advantage$of$a$global$spread$of$readers,$though$our$ readership$is$primarily$targeted$at$Indian$audiences.$$More$ details$at$www.thequeerchronicle.com

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TQC

I$just$finished$reading$â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The$Velvet$Rage:$Overcoming$the$ Pain$of$Growing$Up$Gay$in$a$Straight$Man's$Worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;$by$ Alan$Downs,$PhD.$I$have$found$this$to$be$perhaps$the$ most$helpful$and$profound$book$on$the$subject$I$have$ yet$to$read.$From$a$psychological$standpoint,$Downs$ examines$the$shame$and$pain$that$permeate$the$lives$of$ gay$men$and$the$destructive$patterns$and$choices$that$ gay$men$often$make.

The$book$is$broken$down$into$three$stages$of$ development$for$the$gay$man.$The$first$stage$is$ "Overwhelmed$by$Shame".$Usually$this$stage$begins$in$ childhood.$The$feelings$of$being$unloved$and$flawed$ prevent$the$self$from$developing$a$healthy$emotional$ state$as$it$would$in$a$"normal"$straight$boy.$Not$just$ children$KK$adults$can$find$themselves$in$this$stage$as$ well.$The$individual$learns$to$fake$being$straight.$ Essentially,$he$is$searching$for$and$receiving$a$false$ rather$than$authentic$validation$that$ultimately$does$not$ satisfy$his$need$for$authenticity.$Inauthentic$validation$ leads$to$rage.$The$author$likens$the$enraged$gay$man$ unto$a$trapped$animal$K$cornered,$trembling,$and$ snarling.$Thus$begins$the$downward$spiral.$The$rage$ pushes$people$away$from$him,$and$with$them$goes$the$ validation$he$so$desperately$craves.$So$he$hides$his$ anger$in$a$"velvet$glove"$and$becomes$for$all$the$world$ to$see,$the$gracious$friend$and$lover$he$aspires$to$be.$Yet$ he$remains$extremely$sensitive$to$the$slightest$ invalidation$which$is$met$with$his$swift$rage.

The$shame$stage$is$followed$by$the$compensation$of$ shame.$Generally,$this$appears$to$be$the$longest$(and$for$ me,$the$most$fascinating)$stage$of$development.$At$this$ point,$the$gay$man$is$usually,$but$not$always,$out.$Being$ out$does$not$necessarily$man$that$one's$identity$crisis$ has$been$solved.$Usually,$far$from$it.$The$gay$man$will$ compensate$for$this$toxic$shame$by$becoming$the$very$ best$at$whatever$it$is$that$he$does$in$order$to$reduce$the $ feelings$of$inferiority$that$continue$to$plague$him.$It$ becomes$a$quest$of$acquisition:$houses,$cars,$art,$ perfectly$chiseled$body,$worldly$sophistication,$and$ usually$numerous$sexual$encounters$with$beautiful$men.$ Of$course,$these$never$satisfy$as$the$validation$that$the$ gay$man$receives$is$still$inauthentic.$Eventually,$the$ trappings$of$the$success$that$he$so$desperately$chased$

JUL12

21

will$leave$him$empty$and$unsatisfied$and$the$vicious$ cycle$of$more,$more,$more,$more$continues.

The$final$stage,$"Discovering$Authenticity",$proves$to$ be$the$ultimate$goal$of$a$gay$man's$life.$Usually$this$ stage$comes$later$in$life,$as$the$gay$man$becomes$ comfortable$with$his$sexuality$and$learns$by$trial$and$ error$that$all$he$had$been$striving$for$is$empty.$Only$ then$he$begins$to$search$for$real$meaning,$purpose,$ and$integrity.$While$this$is$the$best$stage$of$a$gay$ man's$life,$it$is$also$the$least$visible.$He$is$more$likely$to $ withdraw$from$the$clubs$and$social$scene$because$he$ doesn't$need$it$to$fulfill$him.$The$ironic$thing$is$that$the $ contented$man$is$enjoying$life$at$home$while$his$ younger,$conflicted$counterparts$who$need$to$see$and$ be$around$him$will,$more$than$likely,$not$get$the$ opportunity.$ I$have$to$say,$I$read$this$book$over$a$period$of$just$a$ couple$of$days$and$was$absolutely$riveted.$Honestly,$I$ can$say$that$I$bumped$into$myself$on$quite$a$few$ pages.$There$were$several$"AKHa"$moments$where$I$ realized$K$THAT'S$why$I$do$what$I$do.$I$would$tend$to$ think$that$a$lot$of$the$information$found$in$the$book$ would$be$directed$at$middleKaged$gay$men,$but$I$ would$think$that$the$younger$one$is$that$reads$this,$the $ better$chance$he$would$have$of$saving$himself$a$lot$of$ heartache.

For$me,$the$most$important$aspect$of$this$book$is$that$ it$advocates$the$mentality$that$gay$men$are$NOT$ victims$and$should$not$assign$blame$to$others$for$the$ situations$in$which$they$find$themselves.$Rather,$the$ author$encourages$gay$men$to$make$active$and$ positive$choices$that$enhances$their$lives$rather$than$ bad$choices$that$will$damage$their$lives$and$ruin$their$ selfKesteem.$He$even$provides$a$list$of$real,$practical$ steps$to$becoming$an$authentic$individual.

The$Velvet$Rage:$Overcoming$the$ Pain$of$Growing$Up$Gay$in$a$ Straight$Man's$World$(Paperback) Author:$Alan$Downs$ Publisher:$Da$Capo$Press$(2006) Available$at$www.queerKink.com

22

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The$Velvet$Rage:$Overcoming$the$Pain$of$Growing$Up$ Gay$in$a$Straight$Man's$Worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;$is$a$surprisingly$easy$ read$and,$I$promise,$you$will$feel$like$you$are$listening$ to$a$warm,$caring,$non$judgmental$friend.$I$can$only$ say,$do$yourself$a$favor$K$read$this$book$and$take$it$to$ heart. TQC

TQC

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All editions of TQC are now available as free ebook downloads at queer-ink.com http://queerink.com/

24 MAY12

TQC 17

the after party

Mary J Blige by shourya

The$Queen$Of$HipKHop/Soul$Mary$J$Blige$

Although$personally$I$find$the$song$just$about$average,$trust$

just$unveiled$her$latest$video$‘Why?‘$

Mary$to$gloss$it$up$with$a$slick$video$(rare$are$the$times$when$

featuring$rapper$Rick$Ross,$from$her$

Mary$J$Blige$comes$out$with$just$an$average$music$video).$

GoldKcertified$10th$studio$album,$‘My$ Life$Pt$II$:$The$Journey$Continues$(Act$1)‘.$

With$over$600,000$copies$of$the$album$sold,$Mary’s$pretty$much$ added$another$hit$album$to$her$discography,$and$while$‘Why?‘$ seems$to$be$a$good$video,$I$do$not$see$the$song$being$the$ sleeper$R’n'B$hit$that$the$Drake$assisted$‘Mr$Wrong‘$eventually$ turned$out$to$be,$moving$slowly$and$steadily$into$the$top$10$of$ he$Billboard$R’n'B$Singles$Chart.$ The$album’s$packed$with$amazingly$well$crafted$Urban$Radio$hits $ like$‘Empty$Prayers‘$(definitely$an$adult$contemporary$hit$ waiting$to$happen),$the$BeyonceKassisted$‘Love$A$Woman‘$(a$ bonaKfide$#$1$smash$on$Urban$Radio$if$this$one’s$released),$as$ well$as$the$NasKassisted$‘Feels$Inside‘,$a$cleverly$crafted$track$ that$could$well$cross$over$to$Pop$Radio.$

MAY12 JUL12

TQC

17 25

for the morning after –

LAMB GOULASH

26

TQC

Ingredients • 2.2$pounds$lamb,$cubed$into$ approximately$¾Kinch$pieces • 3$ounces$lard • 1$large$onion,$chopped • 4$teaspoons$paprika • Salt,$caraway$seeds$and$ chopped$garlic$to$taste • 2.2$pounds$potatoes,$cubed$ into$3/8Kinch$pieces • 1$green$pepper,$chopped • 2$ounces$fresh$tomatoes,$ chopped • Cold$water • A$few$handfuls$of$small$soup$ pasta$pieces Preparation.

• Fry$the$chopped$onion$in$the$ melted$lard$until$golden$ brown.

• Lower$heat$and$add$the paprika,$stir$rapidly,$then$add$ the$meat,$with$salt$to$season.$ Keep$stirring.

• When$the$meat$has$browned$ and$the$liquid$has$evaporated,$ add$caraway$seeds,$garlic$and$a$ small$amount$of$cold$water.$ • Cover$and$braise$slowly,$ stirring$occasionally$and$adding$ more$water$if$necessary.$ • Just$before$the$meat$is$ completely$tender,$add$the$ potatoes,$green$peppers$and$ tomatoes.$Add$the$pasta$ before$serving$according$to$the$ length$of$time$it$needs$to$cook$ (should$be$quick)$and$adjust$ quantity$by$adding$water$or stock.

JUL12

TQC

27

VOLUME 1, ISSUE 1

VERSION 1.0 PUBLISHED ON MAY 21, 2012

List of LGBT friendly psychiatrists, HIV/AIDS counselors, STD specialists and sexologists in India Mission for Indian Gay & Lesbian Empowerment (Mingle)

LGBT Friendly Psychiatrists Note:

A psychiatrist is qualified to prescribe medicines in addition to counseling. A clinical psychologist / counselor / psychoanalyst is not a qualified medical practitioner and is not allowed to prescribe medicines.

The names are preceded by an (M) Male or (F) Female to indicate the gender of the doctor / counselor. LGBT folks of any gender (M/F/T) can seek their appointment.

MUMBAI

MUMBAI (Continued..)

(M) Dr. Ketan Parmar

(F) Dr. Anjali Chhabria

Mobile: 9820900115

www.anjalichhabria.com

(M)Dr. Bharat Shah

(M) Dr. S.L. Khanna

Chembur clinic: 022-25229200

Mobile: 9820067355

Lilavati Hospital OPD: 91-22-26751000, 26568000

(M) Dr. Gurvinder Kalra Sion Hospital, Department of psychiatry 9 am to 12 noon Humsafar Trust - Tues & Fri by appointment

(M)Dr. Harish Shetty Hiranandani Hospital, Powai OPD: 022- 25763300 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 33

BENGALURU

26673800, 26650547 (M)Dr. Bhupendra

Disclaimer:

All information in this document is provided for general information only and is not in the nature of advice. It should not be relied upon for any purpose and Mingle makes no warranty or representation and gives no assurance as to its accuracy, completeness or suitability for any purpose and Mingle cannot be held responsible for any losses thereof.

(M) Dr. Rajesh Parikh Jaslok Hospital by appointment only

Manipal Hospital OPD: +91-80-25024444/3344

4933333, 4963333, 4963343 (ext: 3200/3830)

(M)Dr. Shekhar Seshadri NIMHANS Hospital

(M) Dr. Rajiv N. Jerajani (Versova)

email: shekhar@nimhans.kar.nic.in

Mobile: 9870066282

PUNE (M) Dr. Rajendra Barve (Dadar) 022-24382525

(M)Dr. Raman Khosla (Trained at NIMHANS) Mobile: +91-9326848501 (SMS before calling) email: ramankhosla@gmail.com

29

VOLUME 1, ISSUE 1

VERSION 1.0 PUBLISHED ON MAY 21, 2012

List of LGBT friendly psychiatrists, HIV/AIDS counselors, STD specialists and sexologists in India Mission for Indian Gay & Lesbian Empowerment (Mingle)

LGBT Friendly Counselors

AIDS, HIV, STD and Skin Specialists

BENGALURU

MUMBAI

(M)Mahesh Natarajan

(M)Dr. Maninder Setia

Counsellor at Innersight

HIV and AIDS specialist

+91-80-41649080

Mobile: +91-8976062646

Note:

A psychiatrist is qualified to prescribe medicines in addition to counseling. A clinical psychologist / counselor / psychoanalyst is not a qualified medical practitioner and is not allowed to prescribe medicines.

The names are preceded by an (M) Male or (F) Female to indicate the gender of the doctor / counselor. LGBT folks of any gender (M/F/T) can seek their appointment.

(F)Ajanta De Counsellor at Innersight +91-80-41649080

Parivarthan Counselling Facility: +91-80-25298686

MUMBAI (F) Dr. Eshita Mandal

Disclaimer:

All information in this document is provided for general information only and is not in the nature of advice. It should not be relied upon for any purpose and Mingle makes no warranty or representation and gives no assurance as to its accuracy, completeness or suitability for any purpose and Mingle cannot be held responsible for any losses thereof.

Mobile: 9833122303 www.in.linkedin.com/pub/dreshitamandal/1a/726/855

(M) Kuldeep Datey www.facebook.com/note.php? note_id=428763484199

KOLKATA (F) Dr. Joly Laha

Clinic – 66 Hi Life, Ground Floor, Near Santa Cruz Stn. (W), Landmark: Shabari

(F) Dr. Hemangi Jerajani HIV, skin, VD specialist and counselor Mobile: 98200 31483 Sujoy Hospital OPD: 022-2632 7252 Directions to reach Sujoy Hospital: Come out of Juhu Gali, pass Talwalkar Gym, Next to Criticare Hospital Landmarks: Bhakti Vedanta Road, Tian restaurant, Mithibai College

(M) Dr. M.S. Menon – HIV specialist Life Care Center – Andheri (E)

(M) Dr. Torsekar Skin, STD, HIV, Sexologist (Mulund/Dombivali) +91-9404174078, +91-22-2163 9899, +91-22-2163 0899

Counsellor at Samikshani Mobile: +91-33-24663504

THANE (M) Dr. Shirish Kulkarni – Skin, STD, HIV,

30

Sexologist- above Moni’s Restaurant, near Ice Factory, Mobile: +91-9820598046

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