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First Place Award Winners from the New York Press Association & American Scholastic Press Association

The Pace Chronicle Volume II, Issue XV

Inside News.........3 Feature...........2,4 Health....5 Advertisement....6-8 Entertainment.....9, 10 Sports.............11,12

Entertainment: Page 10

Lottery Tickect Lost on Campus

News: Page 3

Tiger on Pace Campus

Health: Page 5

Pace University, Pleasantville/Briarcliff Manor, NY

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Chef Rachel Ray Comes to Pace Erin O’GOrman News Editor

On April 14, pace graduate, chef, host of 30 Minute Meals and of the Rachel Ray show Rachel Ray will come to Kessel and teach students how to make meals that are nutritious, quick, cheap and simple to make. “This is a great opportunity for students to learn basic healthy cooking,” said the Student Development Center for Activities office. “Sometimes it’s tough to eat well with busy schedules, so they resort to living on easy mac and ramen noodles. That can lead to a really unhealthy lifestyle and cause medical problems. It can also hinder learning and schoolwork, so eating right is very necessary. Rachel is a graduate of Pace, so she knows the school. In a lot of her cooking she also shows ways to save money, which a broke college student very well use.” In a survey, students admitted that they often frequently choose “instant” foods in time crunches and some even claim that the cafeteria does not give enough healthy choices. Those who live close to campus also have the opportunity to eat at home; one girl who lived less than an hour

Photo from

Rachel Ray will be coming to do some of her cooking demonstrations with students.

away from campus stated that she’d taken herself off the meal plan because she could not get used to the kind of food served. Those who live in the townhouses and new dorm are given kitchens, so they have an opportunity to cook for themselves, and also have more space to store and hold food. Those who live in the dorms such as north hall also have kitchens but as freshmen are more limited it seems. “I don’t have time to cook or space to cook my own meals, or the means to go out and do regular food shopping” said one

freshmen. “The meal plan makes things a lot easier.” In addition to demonstrations Rachel Ray will talk about eating healthy during college life and talk about her own experiences at Pace. “We could have gotten anyone,” said people from the SDCA office. “But because Rachel is a graduate of the school students can relate so much more to her than they could to someone who didn’t go to Pace. She’s a lot of fun and has lot of energy; I think the students will enjoy her.” Celebrity visits to Pace are not

uncommon. Others who have visited include Elvis, Chef Boyardee, and Captain America. “It all depends on their availability,” said the SDCA office. “Some are willing and happy to come, others are too busy and some just aren’t interested, they’re even rude about it. Elvis, he came and put on a free concert. And when Chef Boyardee came he gave out free samples of canned spaghetti and meatballs, the students loved it. Captain America came and discussed with students justice and what it means to him an American hero.” In the same survey, most students said they were very interested in learning to cook for themselves and like that Rachel endorses healthy cooking, going along the lines of people like Jamie Oliver and Betheny Frankel. ”It’s always good when celebrity chefs choose to make healthy meals,” commented a group of nursing major students. They said as much as they love Chef Paula Dean, she is notorious for using loads of butter and mayonnaise in her cooking which can lead to a lot of health problems. Anyone who would like to sign up for the free classes can go online or stop by the SDCA office.

Pace Setter Deemed Politically Incorrect Emily Wolfrum

Featured Reporter

What’s in Kessel Food? Sports: page 11

Pace Curling Team This Fall

Pace University will begin searching for a replacement mascot following the administration’s 9-6 vote abolishing its current symbol the setter. The decision was made after numerous students complained that the Pace Setter was offensive to the demographic of underachieving and inactive students. Though the actual mascot is merely a dog, members of the Underachieving and Assorted Less Ambitious, Arguably Lazy Affiliates (UALAALA) community argued that its allusion to a pacesetter, or a leading, high achieving runner in a race, singled out students who would rather just get by, or who did not enjoy partaking in physically strenuous activities such as running. “I’m sincerely shocked that this issue hasn’t been addressed sooner, especially at a school that boasts its diversity and tolerance,” said applied psychology professor Joan Biggins. “The pun itself assumes a level of intelligence



The choosing of a new Pace mascot will be taking place eventually.

that screams discrimination. Most students don’t even like running that much. It’s totally inaccurate.” Junior environmental studies major Alexa Davis has been a member of the UALAALA community for most of her life, and

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admits that lack of sensitivity and awareness of the demographic has led her to encounter many similar offenses. “I grew up in an area that wasn’t super supportive of the underachieving lifestyle,” Davis

said. “My mom and dad constantly pushed me to succeed in school and reach my full potential. It Continued on Page 2 “Pace Setter Deemed Politically Incorrect”



The Pace Chronicle

Page 2

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Student Watches Entire Series on Netflix in One Day The Pace Chronicle Editorial Staff

Emily Wolfrum

Ali Silver

Feature Editor

After a grueling 24 hours, sophomore business management student Raymond Harries confirmed Sunday that he had finished watching the entire Firefly television series on Netflix. Word was first received of this milestone via a Facebook post at 2:43 a.m., reading, “just finished watching firefly. was pretty good. bored now tho. hmu if u wanna chill.”(sic.) Harries admits that while he watched the entire series within the day, some breaks were taken between episodes to eat and urinate. The feat took place entirely within his North Hall dorm room. “If he didn’t post about it, I never would have known,” said sophomore accounting major Darren Abrams, Harries’ roommate. “I figured he was just screwing around on WoW all day.” Abrams said that he was not in the room during most of Harries’ viewing, but that he had stopped in occasionally to see if his roommate wanted to “go to the caf” or “play FIFA with the bros.” “When he said he was good and was just going to hang back, I didn’t think anything of it,” Abrams said. Harries’ parents had not been notified of his accomplishment until later in the week when his father noticed it in the Recently Watched” queue on the family’s Netflix account. “I went to watch some Co-

Editor-in-Chief Tafasha Pitt Arthur Augustyn Managing Editor Layout/Web Editor Olivia Mapplethorpe Senior Copy Editor

Brian Keegan Copy Editor

Erin O’Gorman News Editor

Cecilia Levine Feature Editor

Samantha Finch Christiana Lloyd Entertainment Editor Health Editor Ebony Turner Opinion Editor

CJ Dudek Sports Editor

Operational Staff Christine Gramlich Business Manager Arthur Augustyn Distribution Prof. Michael Perrota Faculty Advisor

Contributors Photo from Harries’ video-watching accomplishment was done entirely on his 2010 MacBook. lumbo on the Wii when I saw it there,” Harries’ mother Diane said. “It’s pretty good that Ray can get all of his studying done and have time to watch tv. He’s such a good kid.” Harries’ could not be reached for comment on the state of completion on his homework. Media arts professor Bill Cochran said that he had never heard of such an accomplishment before. “I’m completely taken aback. When one of my kids was talking about it in class Monday, I immediately stopped my lecture

to inquire about Harries’ achievement,” Cochran said. “I was surprised there hadn’t been any write-up about it in the morning’s paper.” Despite low coverage of Harries’ viewing accomplishment, his success was spread through word of mouth and inspired numerous other students to attempt similar tasks. Harries’ friend junior economics major Alex Chang said that he was also watching Firefly on Netflix on his peer’s recommendation. Meanwhile, freshman

Pace Setter Deemed Politically Incorrect

Photo from What do you thing our next mascot should be?

... continued from page 1

made accepting myself as a UALAALA really difficult, and wasn’t something I could really embrace until after high school.” Davis further commented that the laid-back college environment had encouraged her to reject previous expectations of success and ambition, but upon realization of the mascot’s alternate meaning her freshman year, she suddenly felt very uncomfortable and isolated. “I came here with high hopes of being able sleep and twiddle my thumbs without risk of persecution, but when I’m being represented by a mascot that is so active and over-achieving, it makes me feel like I’m in high school all over again,” Davis said. Organization of UALAALA members primarily has taken place through passive aggressive Twitter posts with the trending hashtags “#dontevencare” or “#whatever.” When asked if members of the UALAALA would be forming an on-campus alliance any time in the near future, Davis responded: “Probably not.” Another UALAALA identifier senior fine arts major Tyrone Wallace was placed with the task of brainstorming new mascot ideas for Pace University.

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childhood education major Alyssa Rios reported that she was in the process of watching Arrested Development on Netflix. Should she complete this three season series by Friday, she will be a strong rival to Harries’ record. Numerous other students have spoken of “getting around to” watching the series Breaking Bad, though few could be reached who had actually finished the show. Harries would like to thank his father for paying for their Netflix account and buying him the laptop he watched the series on.

“I haven’t really started thinking about it yet. I’ll get to it eventually, I suppose,” Wallace said. Rumored replacement mascots include the Recliner or Chillaxer. The latter has gained much popularity, as it does not even discriminate against those who choose not to use proper English, or the Abbreviators/Slang Sympathizers Who Have Obviously Less Education (ASSWHOLE) community. ASSWHOLE identifier and sophomore history major Megan Cole could not be reached for verbal commentary, but texted: “LOL lyke wouldnt dat B 2 funny if dey made da chillaxr da mascot haha. F da setter jkjkjk :P.” Many students opposed to the administration’s decision to change the Pace mascot could also not be reached due to an upcoming biology exam, however, freshman communications major Devon Ward noted that a negative stigma attached to UALAALA people may be the cause behind their traditional counterparts’ arguments. “It’s frowned upon in a lot of places still today,” Ward said. “Until people stop thinking of the UALAALA lifestyle as something that should be fixed, justice will not be served.”

Samantha Apicella Christopher D’Erasmo Derek Kademian Emily Wolfrum

The Pace Chronicle is published by Trumbull Printing: (203) 261-2548 Written and edited by the students of Pace University, The Pace Chronicle is published weekly during the academic year. Opinions expressed herein do not necessarily represent those of administration, faculty and The Pace Chronicle staff. The Pace Chronicle encourages responses to the opinions expressed herein, and welcomes letters and comments. The Pace Chronicle cannot guarantee publication of letters to the editor or unsolicited manuscripts, and reserves the right to edit or comment editorially on them. Appearance of an advertisement in The Pace Chronicle does not imply endorsements by the members of the editorial board, the advisor, or Pace University of the products or services offered. All photos and copyrights reserved unless otherwise indicated. Subscription and advertising rates available upon request.

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What’s Making News Beyond Campus? Erin O’GOrman News Editor

SIBERIA- A tyrannosaurus rex dinosaur was created yesterday afternoon by scientists in Siberia after its DNA was discovered preserved in a frozen cube. After an ice fisherman found the cube scientists were called and found they were able to clone the DNA using a machine they had developed. Born was an infant baby tyrannosaurus rex the scientists named Rocky. Still young, Rocky is currently being nourished on a diet of liquid food as he has no grown in his teeth yet. Countries are on the alert, for this fear what this beast will be able to do when and if he becomes fully grown. For now he is being hand-raised and scientists do not know yet if he will grow, let alone survive to adulthood. UNITED STATES – The nation is in fury as the government of New York City announced it’s plan to possibly ban morbidly obese people from it’s streets, in order they say to motivate people to be healthy. People are calling this an outrage, while others agree it can push people to eat healthy and cut back on their sugar intake. Some say that it won’t be very effective because new Yorkers walk frequently to places they have to go, so the obesity rate in the city is low. The people who oppose it point out that sometimes obesity can stem from a medical problem like a thyroid condition that is not directly the person’s fault. The government is also looking to close fast food restaurants in the city, claiming it will lower the obesity rates. UNITED STATES – Yesterday the government received a very interesting new recommendation from the EPA regarding transportation; instead of people driving cars, why not be like Glinda the Good and travel in manmade bubbles? They claim they have invented them and are waiting to have them patented until the government bans all environmentally-unfriendly vehicles from the country. According to the EPA the bubbles are ecofriendly and make travel quicker than cars because they float in the sky. The people would just have to think of the place where they wanted to go and the bubble would take them there; each one is designed to three to four people depending on their sizes; they come in small, medium, large and extra-large. No word from the government yet on their opinion of this new contraption. ISRAEL – In other news, Israel is now using camels as guards to block its borders from enemy invaders, much to the fury of some animal rights groups. Israel says camels work because their enemies don’t think of them as a threat, but they are large and can kick and charge. Enemy troops from Syria are now frequently seen leaving the land borders covered in spit and slime and hoof prints.

The Pace Chronicle

Wednesday, April 3, 2013


Tiger Confiscated from Townhouses: Donated



Erin O’GOrman News Editor

A seven hundred pound tiger which was recently discovered to be living as a pet in one of the townhouses on campus is now going to have a permanent home in the environmental center where he will be able to live out the rest of his life. Named Aslan by his students after the lion character in the Narnia book series, the big cat was discovered after he’d escaped the townhouse and attacked a group of students walking on the road path between where north hall and martin hall are and the townhouses. “He’d made himself a spot in the woods,” says campus security. “The thickness of the woods let him be unseen. We heard the growls and students were screaming. We didn’t want to get too close and risk more injuries so we called animal control and they came and tranquilized him.” Right now Aslan is being held at a center for exotic animals ten minutes away from campus until his enclosure here is completed. Senior business major James Sullivan was the one who bought and took Aslan back to his townhouse. Aslan, then a tiny cub, “easily won our hearts with his antics and playful nature. He was the sweetest thing,”, said the housemates. Sullivan says that he’s always had a love for big cats and always wanted a tiger as a pet, despite its wild instincts, so when he discovered one for sale in Westchester

Photo from AlexFrankTiger Aslan is the newest edition to the schools environmental center. he immediately took the opportunity. “I knew there were risks, but I thought, life is short, I’m going to do this and whatever happens will happen. Do I regret it? Not at all. Would I do it again? Probably not. To be honest, I think it was more than I thought it would be. For one thing I didn’t think he’d get as huge as he has or would eat as much as he does. And, we used to just feed him scraps but then that didn’t satisfy him so we would have to go out and buy him meat, which became expensive. I think if this hadn’t happened, I would have eventually just taken him to a zoo or something.” Sullivan received a high fine for this and was required to pay the medical bills of the students who were injured.

Dow Hall Condemned: Erin O’GOrman News Editor

Many students who live in Dow Hall, especially those who live on third floor have complained many times about its outdated interiors. Inside and outside the rooms walls are warped, the linoleum floors are cracking and paint is chipping. If touched, the railings shake as if they can be ripped off with just a tug. Rumor even has it that the fourth floor which no one lives on has toxic chemicals in it, hence why it’s off limits. It’s old enough that it’s got ghost stories and creepy paintings in it that no one can identify, as well as a bit of a history, supposedly belonging to the Addams family at one point. And despite recent renovations to the second floor school administrators and residence life say it is too expensive to gut and change the whole building. However a recent visitor from the board deemed it unlivable and so Pace officials declared it would be torn down and students living inside would be moved to other dorms. When interviewed, some students said they were happy to get out of the building while oth-

ers, particularly freshmen were bummed and had had no issues living there, especially being they had suite bathrooms instead of communal like many of their friends in Hillside and Valley. Administration and the Student Development and Campus Activities (SDCA) say they plan to build a large arcade for Briarcliff students over the grounds of the building. “Many students who live on Briarcliff complain that the weekend bus schedule makes it difficult for them to get over to the other campus for activities, so this arcade will give them some entertainment on Briarcliff,” both administration and the Student Development and Campus Activities office said. Inside they plan to game machines, including old vintage arcade games, ski-ball, pool tables and mini basketball machines. There will also be a recreation area for organizations to host events. Set to be open on strictly weekends, the new arcade will also have a food service stand, which will take students meal plan cards. When asked why it would only be open on weekends, administration said because they would not want it to be a distracSpecial Aprils Fool Edition

“They’re not meant to be pets,” said Professor Angelo Spillo, director of the environmental center. “Those students are lucky to be alive, if anything. A tiger is a big animal that can easily overpower and kill and eat a human. They’re cute and cuddly until they get big and hurt someone. The only place they belong is in the wild, but people don’t understand this.” Pets in general are not allowed in residence halls according to the Guide for Residnce Living, save for fish tanks. Many students who are forced to leave their pets at home when they come to school dislike this. “If we take care of them, why can’t we have them?”, said freshman psychology major Dewun


Burles, who was bummed when he found out he had to leave his two pet ferrets at home. “Not all of us are irresponsible; some of us actually take care of our pets. I love my ferrets and would never neglect them.” Residence life believes that pets should be discouraged because students won’t have time for them. Residence life staff said, “They’re busy with homework and extra-curricular activities. Freshmen who come in wanting to bring their pets don’t realize how difficult it is to balance things, let alone putting a pet into that mix that requires care. It isn’t easy; they have to be fed, cats have to have their litter boxes cleaned and dogs have to be walked regularly. Also, we don’t want students complaining about smells or barking.” Interesting enough, no residence assistant or residence life staff member was aware of Aslans existence until his escape. “We don’t go out and check rooms specifically for pets, it just isn’t our top priority. Most times pet violations are discovered through complaints from other students. No one came to us complaining about noises or anything like that,” said resident assistant Elisa Jakes Aslan’s enclosure will be set up no later than the 2013 Fall semester, where he will be moved into from his home at the exotics center just before students start to move into their dorms and the exhibit will be available for anyone to come and visit.

Arcade to be Built on Site

Photo from Say goodbye to Dow Hall. tion for students; if closed, the temptation for students to go and have fun there instead of focusing on their studies and schoolwork would be diminished. “I’m very excited for this. I love that it’ll be open every weekend so that way I’ll have “something to do” every weekend even if there isn’t anything going on campus. I’m the kind of person who just enjoys hanging with friends; I’m happy to do anything as long as I’m with them and this place will be a great new hangout spot,” said sophomore finance major Pat Jules. The SDCA office feels it will also be a good place for students

to meet other students, as they sometimes receive complaints that there aren’t enough ways for students to mingle. Some students however, are not happy to see Dow Hall go, calling it a piece of history that should be preserved. They feel that the amount of money being put into the arcade project would equal how much it would cost to modernize the entire inside of Dow, “so, why not update the inside and keep the outside?”, the students say. The demolition of the building is set to begin in approximately two weeks.



The Pace Chronicle

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Mirrors in Mortola

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Horoscopes Cecilia Levine

Feature Editor

Aries: Don’t trust anyone, not even your friends and especially not your latest booty-call. Go with your natural instincts - if you think someone poked a hole in the condom, chances are they did. Remember, trust nobody but yourself. Taurus: Indulge in your need for physical action. Instead of the usual wam-bam-thank-you-ma’am try to go a little bit longer because you are likely highly sexually frustrated. Don’t be afraid to let loose, but not too loose!

Photo from How many times do you look in the mirror a day?

Cecilia Levine

Feature Editor

Contrary to the words of the late Marilyn Monroe, a girl’s best friend is not a diamond, her vibrator, or the hidden stash of Goldfish in the secret pocket of her purse. A girl’s best friend is not her confidant, who will tell her that she looks prettiest when she cries and when she’s feeling fat she will tell her that boys actually like a little bit of curve in a woman. One could make the argument that these are all viable best friends, but the real soul mate lies within the walls of the concrete that keeps us sound during the storms. They lurk in unexpected places like car windows and sunglasses. A girl’s best friend lies in the space between the blinds of the library that shines rays of sunlight onto the papers and binders of diligent students. Pace has become aware of the necessities that reflections provide, which is why they are choosing to replace the already slightly reflective windows of Mortola with two-way mirrors. Many people have a natural proclivity to turn their head towards the sight of their own reflection. The glass windows do not give students a sufficiently clear glimpse of themselves. At times when reapplying lip gloss is a must, the new windows of the library will take the place of yesterday’s pocket mirror.

Students have become far too preoccupied with their studies and giving back to society to keep up with personal appearance. Pace hopes that the mirrors will help to instill a lost element of selfmaintenance into its student body. Although the administration is grateful that the staff and faculty have inspired a great work ethic among the students, they feel that too few disciples take personal appearance as seriously as they used to. Females especially do not concentrate enough on daily appearances. While the bookstore and Kessel does have an uncanny ability to drain wallets faster than a Swedish House Mafia concert, under no circumstances should students be shelling out money on scholastics if they are not willing to spend equal amounts on their wardrobes, hair and nail appointments and gym memberships. While most students spend too little time with self-upkeep, the administration appreciates the others’ need to obsess over it all of the time. In addition to the two-way mirrors, a popcorn machine and massage chairs will be installed on the other side of the windows so that the audience will be able to enjoy the show of public maintenance to the fullest. The administration anticipates an entirely better looking and materialistic student body to emerge years before the campus consolidation takes place. This way, Pace Pleasantville will be attractive inside and out.

Gemini: It’s been a busy week, which left you with little time for yourself. Take a moment to consider your feelings. If you feel burning or itching in or around your genitals have a shot of tequila and hit the hottest clubs. Happiness is possible when you accept what you cannot change. Cancer: Let your emotional waters flow freely, allowing your urinary tract infection to clear up. Drink plenty of cranberry juice and check out the drug store for supplements. You can still engage in sexual endeavors just make sure as not to urinate on your partner. Leo: Allow others to see your giving side, you have much to share that you’ve been holding in. Feel free to give more oral sex than you receive this week because you’ve been greedy, and you need to make up for that. This will also help to stretch out your jaw and tongue which will come in handy later down the line. Virgo: It’s tempting to criticize the immaturity of others. Not everyone has as much game as you do, which makes losing sight of your usually high standards easy to do. Stop aiming for the scum of the earth like you have been and strive for the best of the best, those most likely to say yes. Numbers count, so keep tallies. Libra: Too much of your time is spent trying to please others. Take down the façade and unhinge the filters to let your true, dirty-self shine. Forget about what others think and start living according to your own values, which includes plenty of S&M. Pink fuzzy or black leather? You decide. Scorpio: One of your better qualities is that you see the potential in every being, which means that your love for animals doesn’t have to be restricted to your monthly donations to the local animal shelter. Next time you feel inclined to get frisky consider some of the other options that nature has to offer. There’s only one way to find out if you can truly screw like a jack rabbit. Sagittarius: This month you’ve been very wasteful, from your wallet to your razors. Consider cutting back on cutting back. Not only does hair prevent external bacteria from entering the body, it serves as a layer of protection and will keep the body warm when we most need heat.

Capricorn: You have a very powerful soul and in turn so are your hormones. Make sure to wrap it twice because you, unlike others, are twice as likely to conceive. Buy the extra pregnancy tests and the morning after pill just in case. Abstaining will not be necessary. Aquarius: New experiences have always appealed to you and a little bit of experimentation goes a long way. Go against religion for once and release your sexual energy with someone of the same gender instead of releasing your need for excitement in other places. Pisces: Turn over a new leaf and check the undersides of your latest rocks because a hidden gem awaits. The monotonous vaginal in-and-out will likely lead to pregnancy and tends to expand after many thrusts. The anal passage will allow seed to spill a far less chances of sperm to egg encounters. Lube up!

Photos Special Aprils Fool Edition



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The Pace Chronicle


Wednesday, April 3, 2013


Christian Lloyd

Health Editor

You know those moments when you bite into a big juicy burger and think, “mmm that’s some grade-A beef.” Well unfortunately that hasn’t been happening on the Pace university campuses. A week before everyone left for spring break, Chartwells, the company that our school uses for our cafeteria was put under heavy investigation after a large number of students started emailing in complaints about the quality of food that was being served. “I was beginning to find the meat wasn’t as tasty and my burgers started to give me a stomach ache” said sophomore football player Alex Waltham What was found was astounding. All the beef products that were being sold to students contained 40 percent ground horsemeat. Yes, the same animals that many consider fond pets are being chopped up for cheaper meat production and sold unknow-



How can you be sure what’s really on your plate? ingly to pace university students. “I couldn’t believe it when I first heard, I have been feeling weird after eating in kessel for a while so I just stopped and went to the local places in town. Its gotten expensive but I’m so glad that I did now” said junior nursing major Kristina Rossi This isn’t the first time that Kessel has been investigated for

improper food service and bad quality of its food. Not even two years ago the school experienced a large breakout of E. Coli and was closed for two days to be thoroughly cleaned and sanitized. This time though, not only was students complaining, but faculty as well. “I have been teaching at this school for over 12 years and I’ve

heard majority or my students complain about the food here, I started stopping in the café to grab lunches between classes this year and finally realized why everyone complains so much. It doesn’t surprise me at all that they are finding horsemeat being used” said Dyson Professor Lozano. Lozano might not be as surprised as all the others who have



heard of the issue, but those that are, are dumbfounded even more to find out that the use of horsemeat in replacement of beef isn’t a new thing here in America. There have been multiple times when the beef industry was suffering and due to the large demand for meat, other animals were substituted into beef products and mixed in, but still sold under Beef labeling. Right now the beef industry is as stable as ever which is why when Chartwells was first found to be a culprit of this, there was a large confusion as to why. “Who knows, my guess would be that they are just cheap. I mean I’ve been served everything from old veggies, still frozen chicken, and expired milk used in my smoothie, I wouldn’t be surprised if they found more than horsemeat” said Alyssa Odell So until the Investigation is finished, you might want to check to see if your burger is saying “Neigh” instead of “Moo” when eating in Kessel.

New String Of STI Breakout On Campus Christiana Lloyd

Health Editor

When you hear the term STI, your first instinct is to cover your privates while your mind tries to remember every symptom you’ve heard of in order to reassure yourself that you are clean. Unfortunately people’s privates here at Pace aren’t as clean as they normally are. With spring’s arrival, students are winding down the school year with more recreational play, whether it’s the passing of valentines, the approaching warmer season, or just a more comfortable bonds forming between students. Some have been forgetting the biggest rule or swapping bodily fluids between the sheets and are now paying the price. Under school policy if there is a large breakout of any type of virus or illness, the university must notify the students in order to help contain the situation as well as make the students aware of the possibility of infection. School Nurse Practitioner Gracie Howell said “we have had to release school wide statements before, but they are usually for things such as the flu, bronchitis, or menegitis, this is the first STI, but what is so bothersome about it is that we have never seen nor heard of any of these symptoms belonging to a single STI before. Its almost as if this is a Super STI which we cant treat.” So how is this looking for students? to understand why this is



Time for a checkup.

such a huge problem, you must first understand what a normal STI is. Many believe that an STI and an STD is the same thing. This is not true. STDs are Sexually Transmitted Diseases while STIs are Sexually Transmitted Infections. STIs are transmitted through sexual activity (vaginal, oral, & anal) and as a result of the infection, these STIs can become STDs overtime. Most STI’s are mild or hardly even noticeable, and if caught quickly can be treated before they become severe enough to develop into a STD. The new strain of STI that has been breaking out on campus is

far from mild. “Students have all come in complaining of the same long list of symptoms, and after being looked at, we are finding the same thing on all of the students. Girls suffering from the STI are coming in complaining of severe itching, greenish brown discharge, fevers, and loss of appetite. Boys are complaining of swollen testicles, faint bluish rings found on the penis, and a burning sensation when they pee. More so, both sexes with the STI are found to have large red blister-like scabs forming around their privates” said Howell. Most STI’s only have a few

symptoms such as itching or a slight fever, With this new STI having so many symptoms, it is hard treat them all at once. One medication that is meant to help control and reduce redness or itching can cause the blisters to worsen or the swelling that boys are experiencing to increase. “That is why we are so concerned by this outbreak. If we can’t control or put a stop to the symptoms, this infection will only grow and progress until it becomes a full-blown disease. As of now we can only treat those suffering for one or two of their symptoms and hope that what we give them wont cause more prob-

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lems” said Howell. So what is the best thing for us Pace students to do? It’s an old tale, but be smart. Don’t think that you can’t be infected. Always use protection. Condoms and oral dams are the safest way to protect yourself from a STI and STD especially if you don’t know your partners sexual history. Remember that you can contract an STI or STI from oral, vaginal, and anal sex. Above all, try to avoid sleeping on the living room furniture at the townhouses no matter how drunk you are. After 20 years of use and abuse, anything could be growing on them.


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Wednesday, April 3, 2013

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The Pace Chronicle

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Wednesday, April 3, 2013


The Pace Chronicle

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Justin Timberlake to Play Townhouse Day Derek Kademian Featured Repoter

After an incredible turn out the past several spring concerts, Pace has come to an agreement that Justin Timberlake & ‘NSYNC will perform at this years Townhouse Day. But, one may wonder, with such iconic names, will proper security measures be taken? According to a statement from Timberlake’s management, “Pace has such a diverse musical culture and after seeing the results from past performers, Mr. Timberlake could not imagine performing at any other school.” The main man to thank for all of this is President Friedman, who knew Timberlake as a kid from his neighborhood. “I’ve known Justin since he was child…between that and my understanding of the success that we’ve had in previous years, I figured I’d give JT a ring to see if he was down,” said President Friedman. Timberlake’s management also included that his old band mates from ‘NYSNC will be joining him on stage. This will mark their first reunion show in over a decade. “I can’t wait to play with them

again, it’s been years; I just hope Lance doesn’t wear that ridiculous astronaut costume again,” Timberlake added. Last year’s total attendance attracted nearly the entire population of the Pace community, which means that this year the number could be substantially larger. The main concern by Pace administration is whether or not security will be able to handle such chaos. Over the past several years, security at these events has become a little overwhelmed, especially by diehard Wale and Travie McCoy fans. “We aren’t positive that we’ll be able to have complete control over the event, so we’re hiring some extra help,” said Vincent Beatty, head of campus security. According to Beatty, he called upon the help of Hell’s Angels, the gang that provided security during the legendary Rolling Stones Altamont Free Concert, which resulted in the death and injury of several attendees. “They might be a bit aggressive, but they get the job done,” Beatty added. Timberlake’s performance will be in support of his first effort in seven years. The concert will be held in the upper lot located in back of the Townhouses April 27.



Samantha Apicella

Feaatured Reporter

The ghost of a rock and roll legend was spotted in Dow Hall on Mon., April 1. For years now, there have been rumors that Dow is haunted; but those rumors are now confirmed as facts. And it is all thanks to freshman agriculture major Forest Bunny Walker. Walker spotted the ghost of Jimi Hendrix late Monday night. “It was about 11:30 p.m. and I had just finished meditating,” said Walker. “I was listening to Hendrix’s new album, People, Hell and Angels and that was when it all went down.” Walker felt a cool pocket of air rush past him while he was lying on his bed. He thought that was strange considering the heat was on and there were no windows open. His roommate was sound asleep. “I thought nothing of [the cold air] at first,” Walker said. “That is, until I heard the loud yelling coming from upstairs.” Walker automatically knew that something strange was happening. The floor above his is

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Wednesday, April 3, 2013



closed off. It was apparently closed due to hauntings, but no one knew for sure. After all, students were never up there. But something, an unknown force, compelled Walker to find the source of this yelling. It was time for him to do some exploring. “The yelling was incessant,” said Walker. “I knew I wouldn’t have been able to enjoy the album or fall asleep until I found out who it was and where exactly it was coming from.” Walker snuck out of his dorm room with ninja-like stealth. He knew that he had to make this quick. His hallway was unusually dark and silent. And it was warm, unlike his now freezer of a room. Next, he climbed the staircase with ease and stillness. The closed off floor was even darker than his. With a gulp of courage, he made his way into the abyss of the vacant hallway. “At first, I was nervous because I couldn’t see anything,” said Walker. “But then I saw a dim light coming from what appeared to be a janitor’s closet. What I found there, I will never forget.” The door appeared to be

slightly ajar. With curiosity, Walker opened it. He never found where the illumination was coming from but he found out who was yelling. “I thought I was dreaming when I saw Jimi Hendrix staring at me,” Walker said. Hendrix was standing there looking down at Walker, who was naturally in shock. But just when he thought the shock was over, something even stranger happened. The legend spoke to him. “Are you experienced?” Hendrix asked the boy, pointing at him as he spoke. Walker couldn’t think of anything to possibly say. And just when he was about to utter a word, Hendrix faded as fast as he came. “Most people think I’m crazy now,” Walker recalled. “But I know what I saw and what I heard. It was him.” Because of this, April 1 is no longer April Fools Day at Pace. Rather, it is the day Jimi Hendrix decided to grace students with his presence to take a break from kissing the sky.



The Pace Chronicle

Page 10

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

$50,000 Lottery Ticket Lost On Campus Gold Rush Doubler is a red and gold five dollar ticket with gold bricks in the center background. There is a bonus section on the center right followed by the four winning numbers and a your numbers section three sections down and five sections across. Anyone who would looking for a more in-depth description of the ticket should go to http:// tag/gold-rush-doubler/ to get an online photo of the ticket. The winning numbers on the ticket are in this order 5-17-2-10 with a bonus number of 13. Edward Smith has offered a 5,000 dollars reward to anyone who is able to find the ticket. The ticket was a present from his parents in Maryland. Smith states that it cannot be cashed in anywhere outside of Maryland. When quoted Smith stated “I can’t believe that this happened. I went from top of the world to

Christopher D’Erasmo News Editor

Attention all Pace students. There is a lost “Gold Rush Doubler” somewhere within the confines of the Mortola library. Student Freshman Biology major Edward Smith was on the Second floor of the library when upon scratching off his ticket discovered that he won the Jackpot. In his onrush of excitement Stan accidentally put the ticket in his left coat pocket (which has a hole in it). Only after he reach the bottom of the stairs did realize his mistake and that the ticket was gone The ticket is believed to be somewhere between the main stair case and the right side of the second floor. Upon notifying Pace Security the janitors were informed not to clean the entire second floor until the ticket could be found. The

Walking Samantha Finch

Entertainment Editor

With the season three of the hit AMC television show officially wrapped up, the program is hitting the road on a cross- country adventure to visit universities and high schools in all fifty states and Canada. The main characters of The Walking Dead are set to arrive here on Pleasantville campus on April 15 to seek out new extras for the upcoming forth season. To apply for the opportunity,

Photo from How lucky are you?

Dead you need to be students of a university, a dedicated fan of the program, and be able to miss finals for the filming of the show. Andrew Lincoln, the actor behind the infamous Rick Grimes, the leader of the group of survivors in the show will make the final decisions on who will be flown out to California for the shooting of the show. A minimum of one student per school will be chosen. All expenses occurred during the time the of the trip will be covered by AMC and will include a day “behind the scenes”

Coming tour, make up and wardrobe, and of course a sit down dinner with the cast. This season is also said to bring back “characters” as far as flash back scenes and memories that are still embedded within the group, extra will have a chance to play these parts or will be zombies. Pace Professor Lori Holden, also known as Andrea in the Walking Dead, agrees with Pace’s decision to allow the cast to come to campus. “I think this is a great opportunity to get students more in-

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volved with the show and provide a chance to see what it is like on set. More importantly it is a fun method to receive college credit” If selected the students will be flown out to California from May 5 to May 12 and will be shoot on the first five days. The students whom win will be excused from their finals and will receive three credits for the experience. “ I can’t believe such a major show is coming to Pace, I love the program and will diffidently attempting to become a extra of the show.” said senior zombie film

bottom of the heap in less than 60 seconds”. When asking Pace security if they expected anyone to find the ticket head of security Joe Swatsen had this to say; “It is my belief that this ticket will eventually be found. With enough people looking for the ticket it is only a matter of time.” When asked where he thinks it most likely is Joe stated that “it is most likely in a place that few people would think to look. It could be under a chair, desk, or even partially covered behind one of the books on the bottom self.” Both Smith and Pace security are hoping that someone will find the ticket and return it to its rightful owner. If anyone is able to find the ticket they are to bring it to the Pace Security office at the main lobby in Goldstein Academic or call Pace security at (914)773-3400.

Pace major Lexi Arghh. “ It will be a great way to end my senior year.” While in New York, the cast of the Walking Dead will have rooms in North and Martin Hall and will be given a temporary meal card that works on campus. All major characters will be present for the tryouts. For more information on the contest, the show, or any actors in the program please visit amc. com/chancetowin.


The Pace Chronicle

Page 11

Wednesday, April 3, 2013


Sick Days CJ Dudek

Sports Editor

When two lunatics talk, the rest of the world begs them to shut their mouths. Yet instead of airing on the side of caution, the former teammate of “his airness” will head back to an isolated nation for some rest and relaxation. Former NBA All Star and current U.S. basketball ambassador to North Korea Dennis Rodman plans on vacationing in North Korea with Kim Joung Un, according to a report from usatoday. com; and the Pace Chronicle has obtained a rough draft of the vacation’s itinerary of Un and the worm. According to the rough draft of the vacation’s itinerary, the first day of Rodman and Un’s trip will be primarily spent on the Sŏnjuk Bridge in Kaesong for a day of tranquility and reflection. For Un, a possible reflection topic would be the recent United Nations Human Rights Control Council’s pending investigation on the 200 thousand residents living in political prison camps, according to the New York Times. Rodman is expected to reflect on his horrid feud with Randy Savage and his brief reign as a relevant MTV star in The Rodman World Tour. Un and Rodman’s second trip on the itinerary is to be at the Weonsan Diamond district. The itinerary reports that Rodman and Un will spend roughly four hours finding the appropriate endangered fish species and bite their

Photo from Un and Rodman are vacationing together. heads off. Later in the day, the two men will make a trip to mount Guweolsan. It will be here where Rodman is expected to tell Un of his basketball playing days in the 90’s and spend the better part of three hours telling Charles Barkley fat jokes. The last event of the second day will be a meeting at their hotel between Un and Rodman’s

personal height counselor. It is said here that Un will drink plenty of milk and inject testosterone in order to grow; Un’s goal is to become five foot eight so he can ride the roller coaster at Splash Mountain. When day three rolls around, they will visit the shopping district of Luo in order to improve the wardrobe of Un. Rodman’s expected choices for Un’s ward-

robe are pink boas, purple spandex, and leopard shirts with matching fedoras. On the final day of the vacation, the itinerary states that Rodman and Un will order exclusive escorts back to their hotel and hire in nation actors to recreate the events of The Hangover II. Police interference is not to be expected, according to the rough draft of the itinerary.

Set of Curls

CJ Dudek

Sports Editor

Within the unrelenting winter weather blooms the flower of a new sports team at Pace. Starting next semester the Setters will have their very own mixed curling team. The team will feature eight full ride athletic scholarships to four lucky men and women in hopes of making Pace a national curling power. This being said, Pace would need to make certain changes in order to accommodate a curling rink in Goldstein Fitness Center. First off, the Setters would need to make proper renovations in order to place the ice rinks inside the gym without ruining the basketball court. The rink conversion process would be almost exclusively funded by Pace alumni with a deep dedication to ice chess. Even with a newfound dedication to curling, the Setters would need to further emphasize recruiting because not every collegiate curler becomes Glenn Howard. The Setters recruiting strategy would most likely be focused in Minnesota. Pace would almost exclusively scout in Minnesota because, in 2010, four out of the five members on the U.S. Olympic curling team were residents of

Photo from Pace plans on a fall curling team. the land of ten thousand lakes. Perhaps the biggest problem the Setters could face would be finding a proper number of opponents to earn merit points against. The closest curling school to Pace is Misericorda University; which is the better part of a three hour

drive to Pennsylvania. Geographical difficulties would be amplified by the tournament Pace curling would have to partake in. Due to their location, the Setters would primarily compete in the Grand National curling tournament against national powSpecial Aprils Fool Edition

ers like Boston College, University of Pennsylvania, and Brown University. Despite these challenges, the Setters could see money flow into the school in addition to curling stones. With the creation of the curl-

The trip is expected to end in the pair’s hotel after Rodman’s newest autographed book release “The Vacation that Changed my Perspective on the World Forever: My Bestest Friend King Un.” Rodman and Un are both expected to be wearing dresses to promote the book and all of North Korea expects to save the date.

ing team, the Setters would be riding the newest wave of sports profits. According to athletics Villanova University was able to bring in 7,771,424 dollars in part because of their dominance at the roaring game. In addition to the exploding curling market, the Setters would be able to get a University discount at in order to better brush up on curling. Yet the discount of equipment would not be the only reason why Pace would look at the financial benefits of a mixed curling team. If the curling team started winning, the Setters could begin the sales of team jerseys; which would sell like hotcakes due to their affordability. According to, a pair of tournament curling pants goes for 65 dollars. The Setters first planned curling promotional event would involve fans curling themselves. Whichever fan did best would get a U.S.A. curling shirt, a 20-dollar value, for free. Even with the challenges of recruiting, making Goldstein rink-worthy, and buying everything from curling stones to proper shoes, the Setters figure to begin constructing a curling empire this fall.


The Pace Chronicle

Page 12

Wednesday, March 13, 2013


Bone to Pick CJ Dudek

Sports Editor

With long days and a shorter life expectancy, Tymerius Bonetheratrix III, better known to students and faculty as T Bone, provides rallying barks and twolegged antics during games. Most of T Bone’s work days are spent throwing t-shirts to fans, dancing off beat to the stadium music, or simply barking at the opponents. Still T Bone offers a different kind of insight regarding the overall Pace experience. “Arf arf arf woof woof woof woof arf arf,” T Bone said. “Bow wow, woof woof, arf arf arf, woof woof woof, bow wow bow wow.” Despite rumors that the Setter lives in the newly opened Pleasantville Dawg House, the public face of Pace actually lives in a rather luxurious home in the recesses of Goldstein gym. A trip down to T Bone’s doghouse reveals the living conditions fit for Disney stars Chance and Shadow of the Homeward Bound series. The main foyer is furnished with an elegant grizzly bear pelt found west of the Atlantic Ocean.

Directly across from T Bone’s king sized bed is a 64-inch plasma screen television that is preset to the Discovery Channel and a fireplace that is constantly managed by Goldstein employees. T Bone’s dog house also features a treadmill, an indoor swimming pool, and a blue and gold dog bowl filled to the brim with Kibbles and Bits. Today there are times where the setter from Poughkeepsie enjoys curling up by the hearth next to a warm fire. Yet Pace’s mascot constantly reflects on the humble beginnings and the work ethic needed to become the face of Pace. “Woof woof woof ruff ruff ruff, bow wow, arf arf,” T Bone said. “Ruff ruff ruuf, bow wow, arf arf, woof woof, arf.” Even with all of T Bone’s good-natured fun at games, there are still controversial questions regarding the Setter’s mascot. During the past football season it has been alleged that T Bone left in the third quarter of a home game when a parked garbage truck began to drive away. Witnesses at the scene claimed that the Setter took off in pursuit



Students get to know T Bone. of the vehicle for reasons unknown. Some fans screamed for T Bone’s head, others demanded that Pace ‘fix’ the problem, still others demanded that it was the truck driver who should not have driven away until after the game had ended. Amidst all of the allegations, T Bone wants to clarify the in-

cident in question and keep the good name of Pace in tact. “Ruff ruff ruff, bow wow, arf arf, bow wow, woof,” T Bone said. “Bow wow, ruff ruff, arf arf, woof woof, bow wow.” After a two-mile run and two sets of 15 t-shirt tosses, T Bone treads slowly to the king sized bed. Since T Bone is 107 years old (749 in dog years) certain

circles fear that the mascot is well past the prime of a dog’s life. Some have even suggested that T Bone call it a career. However, T Bone refuses to retire out of principle because then Pace could potentially become a “cat” school: and for Tymerius Bonetheratrix III, that is out of the question.

There Can Only Be (D)One CJ Dudek

Sports Editor

Some people move from their homes to new apartments, others move from dorm to dorm, yet for the Pace football team, this move could make waves. According to several inside sources, there is a plan for Pace to move up to Division-I in just football starting in 2013. Pace could potentially join the new Big East next season and play with the likes of Saint Johns, DePaul, Marquette, Villanova, and Seton Hall. With the expected move to the new Big East, the Setters would get a piece of the TV network revenue pie. An article from ESPN. com states that the “Catholic Seven” schools are eyeing a new TV deal around the 500 million dollars for 12 years range; and Pace could grab a slice of that payout. Other than the financial benefits, the students of Pace’s football team would get more recognition from a national audience. Pace fans would potentially be seen on Fox sports and student athletes who played football could receive greater attention at the NFL combine in the early spring of next year. Yet the move to the new Big East could provide Pace quality



Pace could join these schools in the new Big East. football opponents on a national level. Marquette, DePaul, and Saint Johns all failed to win a football

game last season, as well, and the aforementioned TV deal could reach approximately 81 million homes across the country, accord-

ing to The proposed deal would involve the members of the “Catholic Seven” schools to evenly

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divvy up the 500 million dollar pie between ten to 12 schools according to the article; and Pace could grab a slice of the money pie. With the increased revenue made, in part, because of the new TV deal, the Setters would see a dramatic rise in their financial activity. According to, Pace spent 22,950 dollars on recruiting in 2011, which was the second lowest amount in the NE-10. With roughly a 50 thousand dollar payout thanks to the potential Fox contract, the Setters could easily double their recruiting output. With the move the Setters would say goodbye to Northeast-10 rivals such as Adelphi University, Southern Connecticut University, and the University of New Haven. Still, games against Marquette or Georgetown would draw a greater interest from everyone watching. This past season the Setters finished with a record of 0-9. Pace gave up 42 points or more in every game they played in 2012 and the Setters have won one game in the past two years. A change of scenery and a slice of a gargantuan revenue pie could be just what Setters football needs.

The Pace Chronicle - Volume II, Issue XV  

The Pace Chronicle - Volume II, Issue XV .... special April fools edition.

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