New year, new beginnings Family Corner

This month many of our children are heading into new environments – new classrooms, new schools, their first year at university or even a new job. Some will be catching buses away from the Coast for the first time, spending more time away from home than they are used to or may be negotiating the inner city (or even a new city) on their own. While new beginnings are often exciting, the unknown can be a little daunting too. Here are some expert tips for helping kids to adjust.

Self-confidence is a great asset to have when entering a new environment. Jenny Hale, Senior Parenting Coach at Parenting Place says role modelling confidence and optimism can help kids grow their own confidence and positive outlook towards big changes. She also recommends giving them plenty of hugs and hope. ‘There’s something wonderful about a warm hug… Metaphorically, you are packing their bag with love and support for them to draw on during the day.’ Jenny says it’s great to send kids off with the mindset of ‘I can manage today because I am loved and someone believes in me.’

Having strategies to deal with situations that may arise can also help our kids negotiate new environments. Jenny recommends talking to your kids about how they would handle any tricky situations that may arise. For younger children this can be done through playing a game called ‘What would you do if…’ and then talking through options with them.

If your kids are experiencing anxiety about their new activities this year, encouraging them to share their worries with you will help them feel supported and help you better understand their concerns so you can offer the appropriate help and guidance. Parenting Place counsellor Jo Batts says rather than saying there’s nothing to worry about, try telling your kids it makes sense that they might be anxious. This can help to normalise their feelings and then you can work on coping strategies together.

With younger children anxiety tends to relate to external concerns, but with teens and grown children it can often be turned inwards and be more about them coping and fitting in. Sheridan Eketone, a presenter and trainer at Parenting Place, says being gently curious by asking open-ended questions, sharing your own experiences to show you can relate and empathising with how they are feeling are all good ways of helping your older children feel supported and work through any feelings they are having as they head into a new environment.

Claire Nevans | Editor Forparentingresourcescheckoutwww.parentingplace.nz