Week 185

Edition 6

(185)

www.thecourier.es

Friday, September 5, 2014

DOUBLE CHASE DRAMA Shots fired in lunchtime showdown

By ALEX TRELINSKI

Two separate high speed car chases which started from Benidorm saw what authorities described as two dangerous men being arrest­ ed after shots were fired in the packed holiday resort last Saturday lunchtime.

The drama began around noon in Benidorm when a Moroccan driver refused to pull over for the police at a rou­ tine check point, with the officers suspecting that he was driving a stolen car. Two shots were fired, with the 29 year old motorist slamming into another car, before speeding off dangerously, with pedestrians having to dart out of the way.

The BMW vehicle, which had been stolen in Almoradi, then sped off towards the AP7 with a chase on the southbound carriageway towards Alicante City.

Meanwhile, behind the BMW, another car, driven by a 31 year old Algerian, presumed to be an accomplice of the Moroccan, also ignored the Benidorm checkpoint, and he led the police on a chase on the AP7 northbound before his VW Golf was intercepted at the Xixona­Mutxamel exit, The Moroccan BMW driver was pursued by the police for close to half an hour, and was cornered on the Avenida de la Universidad next to the Decathlon store in the northern area of Alicante City, The National Police shot the man in the leg, with six police officers suffering mild injuries as a result of the various altercations. Both men have been charged with a host of offences, including attempted murder and reckless driving, in addition to robbing a house in Almoradi. The Algerian man had been previously arrested for drug dealing, forgery, conspiracy, robbery, theft, assault, and illegal deten­ tion.

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Friday, September 5, 2014

Are you a snapper? Do you have a great photo? Send it to design@thecourier.es and if we think it is good enough we will publish it as our Picture of the Week TELEPHONE

E­MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Calle Luis Canovas Martinez 1. Urb Aguas Nuevas, Torrevieja 03183, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 692 1003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon ­ Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Alex Trelinski CONSULTANT EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 966 921 003 679 096 309 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Patrick International Rep 5 Languages Tel 685 901 265 Writers Donna Gee Sally Bengtsson Jeanette Erath Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Tony Mayes John McGregor

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Picture of the Week

96 692 1003 679 096 309

Configuration of beach stones on Tenerife photo by STANLEY JANYK

JOBS FALL

A total of 8,070 people joined Spain's jobless queues in August, the first rise in unemployment after six months of improvement, with Alicante Province show­ ing one of the biggest leaps in the whole of the country.

The rise means there were 4,427,930 Spaniards registered as looking for work at the country's unem­ ployment offices at the end of August, the figures from Spain's employment min­ istry show. The number of people signed on to the country's social security sys­ tem fell by 97,582 to 16,649,521, the figures reveal. The August unem­ ployment figures do mean there are now 270,853 fewer people registered as looking for work in Spain than a year ago, a fall of 5.76 per cent.

Spain usually experiences a rise in unemployment numbers in August, with the average rise for the month over the last decade being 49,025, according to the employment ministry. In 2013, however, unemploy­ ment fell by 31 in the eighth month of the year.

"The result for the last

month was possible to pre­ dict given there's a strong seasonal effect in August independent of the general state of the economy," Secretary of State for Social Security Tomás Burgos said this week.

The returns for Alicante Province showed a 1.69 per cent rise, which means that there are 201,527 unem­ ployed people in the area, with an extra 3,334 regis­ tered on the dole, but an annual fall of seven per cent.

Meanwhile, an additional 2,710 people were regis­ tered out of work in the Murcia Region compared to July, meaning a 1.95 month

to month rise, though over the last year, the figures have gone down by just over six per cent.

In other economic news, Spain's economy grew by 0.6 per cent between April and June this year com­ pared to figures for the first three months of 2014. That means it is the fastest growth rate for the Spanish economy since 2007, according to figures from the National Statistics Office. It means the economy grew by 1.2 per cent over a year.

Meanwhile, the Statistics Office says the number of new mortgages in June was up nearly 20 percent on the

same month in 2013, only the second such year­on­ year rise in four years. But, the year­on­year rise in June followed hot on the heels of two consecutive months of annual falls — 13.4 percent in April and 3.4 percent in May. Banks green­lighted just over 100 thousand loans in the first six months of 2014, down 14 percent on the same period in 2013, and the lowest figure since 2003. To put the figures in context, the six month return for 2014 is the equivalent to the numbers seen during just one month of Spain's property boom of the previ­ ous decade.

GAS CONS Despite regular warnings to house holders, bogus gas inspectors and workers are still being let into people's homes. That's the view of the Murcia region La Asociación de Consumidores y Usuarios (Consumur), which says that they've had dozens of reports over the summer of DOMESTIC visits from fraud­ sters. The consumer group say that many of the visits surround claims that they were going to inspect the butano equipment and that excessive amounts were being charged for work, including a new trick of say­ ing that they had to be a mandatory change of the valve that is linked to the butano bottle. Consumar emphasise that no "ad hoc" visits should be allowed, and that workmen should only be admitted that customers have booked in advance and preferably those that have done a good job at a fair price in the past.

WANTED – MORE HEADLINE NEWS! DO YOU have a story that might grab the headlines?

What’s all the gossip about round your way? A spate of robberies, perhaps – or maybe you’ve spotted a celebrity in the neighbourhood. Whether your news involves fire, police, ambulance, accidents – or hap­

pier events like family weddings (particularly Golden and Diamond ones!), Just phone the Courier office on 966 921 003 or email office@thecourier.es We’re waiting for your call…and next week’s Front Page story.

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Friday, September 5, 2014

MUCHO DINERO

Whether they are under the mattress or in the coffee jar, Spaniards are holding on to 1.7 billion euros worth of pese­ tas, the currency that disappeared when the euro was intro­ duced 12 years ago. According to the Bank of Spain there are 864 mIllion euros in notes and 805 million euros in coins that have yet to be cashed in. Last year the bank exchanged 2.5billion pesetas for 15 million euros about 12 millions euros of it in notes and the rest in coins.

When the euro was introduced on 1 January 2002, the Spanish government allowed both currencies to circulate for three months, after which pesetas could be exchanged for euros at any bank up until the end of June of that year.

Thereafter, the exchange could only be made via the central bank.

The central bank estimates that about 45% of the 1.7 bil­ lion euros worth of pesetas in the public's hands will never be exchanged. It believes they are being kept by collectors, have been lost, or have left Spain in the pockets of the mil­ lions of tourists who visit each year. People have until the end of 2020 to cash them in, after which the bank will cease to exchange them.

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SUPERMARKET SWEEP SHOCK OF HIS LIFE

A woman set who set fire to supermarkets to avoid paying her grocery bill has been arrested. The 51 year old accused was caught by National Police in Huelva, south­western Spain after an arson attack which caused flames of over five feet in height in a shopping aisle.

On each occasion, she is said to have started the fires to take advantage of the mayhem caused to sneak out of the store with a full trolley. Two fires were started in branches of the same supermarket in the city within less than a week of each other, but on the second occasion she was unable to get away with her trolley and had to abandon it and leave on foot.

Each time, once the panic among staff and customers had subsided and the flames put out, security guards found fire­ lighters where the blaze had started. The total damage caused to the supermarkets was over 2,000 euros.

An 18 year old man was electrocuted after urinating against a lamp post in Mallorca in the early hours of Sunday morning. He was said to be out partying and enjoying the annual sum­ mer fiestas in Bunyola, when he needed to answer a call of nature. The youth decided to relieve himself at the base of a street light whilst leaning against the lamp post, and suffered an electric shock as a result.

He collapsed from the shock and hit his head on the ground. Ambulance staff and police reached the scene within minutes after the accident, but they were unable to save his life. Local authorities are started an immediate investigation to see if other lamp posts in the area had faulty wiring, in addition to scrapping the rest of the Bunyola cele­ brations in the wake of the tragedy.

FIERY NUPTIALS

LA MARINA DEATH

BARCLAYS BOUGHT

Barclays Bank's operations in Spain have been bought out by La Caixa for the sum of 800 million euros. Personal banking, asset management and corporate banking will be taken over by CaixaBank, which will acquire 550,000 of Barclays' customers, 270 branches and 2,400 employ­ ees. Barclays Bank, S. A. U. will continue to have a presence in Spain, albeit a much smaller one, and will focus on its investment banking and Barclaycard lines of business only.

A 68 year old Spanish man died whilst swimming with his son at La Marina beach last week. The tragedy, last Thursday morning (August 28th) happened at 9.45am, when the son noticed that his father was unconscious, and with the help of other bathers, pulled him out of the water. Emergency services were unable to revive him.

OFF THE RAILS

A hitch hit a wedding in Elche last Saturday afternoon when the car that was booked to carry the bride to church went up in smoke. The Rolls Royce, adorned in flowers, which had come to her home in the Carrus area of the city caught fire as it was parked outside the apartment. Nobody was injured as the driver was indoors, and alternative arrangements had to be made to get the bride to the church on time.

Two 24 hour rail strikes have been called by the drivers’ union Semaf, which is set to severely affect RENFE services on Friday September 12th and Monday September 15th. The industrial action is a follow to two earlier strikes during the summer with workers worried about changes to their con­ tracts if services are privatised.

451 licenses to build new homes in Torrevieja have been handed out this year, which shows a rise of over 339 per cent over the same period of 2014. Councillor Francisco Moreno says it is good news and that some two thousand jobs have been created because of the extra work. The high percent­ age rises are however accounted for by the increases com­ ing from a very low initial base caused by the recession.

BUILDING BOOST

BRITS LEAD THE WAY

British tourists are still very much dominating the Orihuela Costa beaches and the area, according to figures pulled together by Orihuela’s tourist department. They’ve reached the conclusion based on the nationalities using the Tourist Information Offices in Playa Flamenca, La Glea, and Zenia Boulevard over the summer. The services attracted the most queries from UK visitors, followed by those from Scandinavia.

BURQA BAN?

Burqas could be banned in Spain as part of a package of new security reforms. Interior minister, Jorge Fernández Díaz said the ban might be included in the final version of Spain's draft Citizen Security Law, which already includes provisions banning people from hiding their faces in demonstrations.

Now could be a "good moment" to look to obtain "a level of consensus" on this issue, the interior minister noted. Díaz stressed his department had no powers when it came to issues affecting the dignity of women, but could rule against the wearing of burqas and other full face veils on the grounds they made identification of people difficult.

"I don't want to say a ban is necessary, " the minister said, but repeated this could be "a good moment" to consider such a prohibition.

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Friday, September 5, 2014

FATALLY FLAWED

UNCHANGING TRIAL ENDS NUMBERS Multiple taxi numbers are still being advertised around the Rojales area despite the launch towards the end of July of a new single number to be used by all local services. Pamphlets and posters in languages including English were produced promoting the new 966 196 999 number, but despite that, the Informacion newspaper reports that many taxi signs have not changed at the height of the tourist season. Councillor Desiderio Aráez of Pader (the Rojales Democratic Party) has slammed the inaction of the council and called for the signs to replaced as soon as possible.

The experiment of running a direct high­speed RENFE AVE train service between Alicante and Seville has ended, and despite significant demand, RENFE have said that they A British coroner has ruled that three pensioners died on a do not know when it plans to reintroduce it, adding that they Saga holiday after an outbreak of Legionnaires ‘disease at did not rule it out returning in the medium term. The company their hotel where the water system was "fundamentally are currently reviewing the ticket sales and income during the flawed". Ray Jones, of Great Abington, Cambridgeshire, A gang of young robbers, including two children, have five week summer trial, though services are still available John Poland of York, and Thomas Elliot of Penzance, all suf­ fered a fatal infection of the waterborne bacteria, during their been arrested for stealing five thousand euros of jewellery which mean physically changing trains in Madrid.

Meanwhile RENFE are offering some 50 thousand promo­ stay at the Diamante Beach Hotel in Calpe in January 2012. from an Elche area house. After taking the items from the In his conclusion, Cambridgeshire coroner David Morris Torrellano home, they began flogging the loot at various tional tickets for services using the Mediterranean Corridor, said: "I think that the water system, the hot water system, pawn and gold stores in the region, to avoid arousing any with tickets using Euromed, Talgo and Intercity trains linking was fundamentally flawed in its design and that it was an suspicion. The plan went wrong when a store owner found Valencia, Catalonia and Murcia. Tickets are available via the unsafe system, and I am minded to record that in my conclu­ himself presented with a valuable golden jewel by a young­ renfe.com website with a promotion allowing one way econ­ ster at his business, and he then rang the police. All five omy travel between Alicante and Barcelona from 17.28 euros sion."

The hotel was built in 2006 and had a Legionnaire’s out­ thieves were arrested in Torrellano, and three of those and 15.60 euros. break a year after opening, although tour operators such as nabbed by the local police had criminal records. They appar­ Saga were unaware of this due to the way outbreaks are ently got the keys to their targeted property from the owner's reported. Barry Hilton, head of water services at Tetra grandson.

Consulting, was sent to investigate the hotel by Saga. He concluded that the bacteria probably thrived in 'dead legs' – redundant pipework – and had not been killed by the sys­ Murcia’s next president tem's chlorifiers due to poor design. might be restricted to eight year’s in power, if current president, Alberto Garre’s plan is adopted by the regional parliament. His move would put a stop to endless terms in power, like Garre’s predecessor, Valcarcel, who was in charge Santa Pola's Levante beach has a new water platform of the Murcia region for 19 which can be used by disabled and elderly people as well years. Garre believes this pregnant women, to enjoy the sea. An awning to provide would be much more demo­ shelter from the sun has been provided in addition to railings cratic, and should be some­ and seats, with plans well in hand for a similar facilIty for the thing that ought to apply to all Gran Playa. of Spain’s regions.

INSIDE JOB

ALBERTO’S GAMBIT

BEACH JOY

RADAR GLITCH

A dozen flights were delayed in and out of Alicante­Elche airport last Saturday due to a problem with the main air traffic control system at Madrid airport. A two and a half hour sys­ tem failure led to delays of up to 90 minutes in services using Alicante­Elche, with 280 flights being affected nationwide.

GENTLE PERSUASION

Costa Blanca tourist chiefs are trying to persuade visitors to come to the area on mini­ breaks this autumn, with the emphasis on people from other parts of Spain. Joaquín Albaladejo, Alicante Provincial Council's tourism minister said that they were focusing on last minute travellers ahead of the different starts to the school year across Spain's regions, by using the web­ site, tuplancostablanca. He added that the province would be represented at various domestic and international tourism events, including a workshop in the Russian city of St.Petersburg organised by tour operator Versa at the end of the month.

SMOOTHER RIDES

Alicante’s Province Council is dishing out over two million euros for road improvements across 42 municipalities, with some of the money being used to repair country lanes around Almoradi, Callosa del Segura, Rafal, and Daya Nueva.

ON TAP

Improvements to the water and sewage system in the Blue Lagoon area of San Miguel de Salinas have been given the go ahead by the local council. Two new water sewage tanks are to be installed to improve the network after a recent pri­ vate partnership improved the quality of drinking water in the Las Filipinas area.

CRASH DEATH BRIGHT SPARK

A 70 year old driver died when he his car collided with a bus in the Torrevieja area at 10.00pm last Sunday evening.

The accident happened on Avenida Alfred Nobel close to the Torre del Moro urbanisation heading towards La Mata. Five other people were taken to Torrevieja Hospital with minor injuries. The car had apparently veered across into the oppo­ site carriageway before the crash happened.

SIGN OF THE TIMES Road signs and street plates are set to be replen­ ished across the Orihuela municipality after a new four year contract was awarded to the lowest bidder, Api Movilidad SL. They beat off competition from 17 other companies in the public ten­ der, offering the lowest bid for the contract. On their list of things to do, will be the replacement of 642 missing street plates on the Orihuela Costa, in addition to 704 missing num­ ber signs in the coastal region.

TIGER BITES

The Tiger Mosquito is caus­ ing problems in parts of La Manga, with suspicions that the pests have been breeding in a large garden in the Puertobello area. The insect specialises in living in buildings, gardens, and balconies, and is difficult to control, and it has been sting­ ing residents since the end of July. The council has stepped up spraying in the area, with concern from the home owners in Puertobello that the mos­ quito could be spreading tropical diseases like chikungunya.

Rojales council has denied deliberately burning garden waste on a municipal site on the Lo Marabu urbanisation.

Rojales Mayor, Antonio Perez, said that a small fire had been caused accidentally by a spark and was quickly extinguished by council workers. The Mayor was responding to criticism from opposing political parties about the amount of noise caused by the mechanical shredders on the site, and that some garden waste was being burnt illegally close to the res­ idential area.

ORGAN LEADER

Spain continues to be the world leader in organ transplants for the 23rd year running. Ahead of the USA and the whole of the European Union, the country has 35.3 donors per million inhabitants, and carried out 4,279 of these delicate and often life­saving operations last year According to the Spain’s National Transplant Organisation, a total of 1,655 people donated their organs in 2013 includ­ ing, in some cases, live donors. Whilst the EU has 19.5 donors per million inhabitants ­ a long way behind the USA's 25.8 ­ Spain is ahead of the field by a long way. In fact, 14% of all transplants in Europe are carried out in Spain, and 4% of all those in the world. Spain 'fitted' 2,552 new kidneys, of which 15% were from live donors, plus 1,093 liver trans­ plants, 249 heart transplants, 285 using lungs, 92 with pan­ creas and eight new intestines.

Friday, September 5, 2014

DEAD RINGER

Police have collared a man who has racked up over 40,000 euros in motoring fines whilst driving his dead brother's car around Tarragona province. The 60 year old law­breaker is said to have lost all his points on his driving licence, which had expired anyway seven year ago, and he built up over 200 fines for speeding and failing to pay toll fees on motorways.

Inquiries were launched when

Catalunya's regional traffic department, the Servei Català de Trànsit (SCT) told the police that they were having trouble pro­ cessing the fines because the owner of the car was shown as having died in 2012. They finally tracked down the man who had notched up the fines, who is the car­owner's brother and is alive and well, during a road stop in the Rambla Nova area of Tarragona city.

NORDIC NOTES

The streets of Torrevieja were full of music last Saturday night as the annual Bands Festival came to an end with the closing ceremony. The event, organised by the city's musi­ cal society known as Los Salerosos handed a Scandinavian finale, with the entertainment provided by the Norweigan Kalbotn Konsert Orkester who performed around the Plaza de la Constitución area.

Spanish cities of note – Central Spain.

Segovia seems to sail like a ship to the backdrop of the imposing Sierra Guadarrama mountain range. The world famous Segovia aqueduct, standing 93 feet high and consisting of 167 arches, to this day carries water from the Rio Fria to the heart of the city. From the base of the Aquaduct the city climbs steeply upwards. In the main square, the massive medieval cathedral. The last Gothic cathedral built in Spain. Its golden coloured stone glinting like sails in the sun. Narrow cobbled streets lead us past an array of shops, churches and monasteries to the most amazing palace which offers stunning views of the valley below. Many of Spain’s most important his­ torical figures have walked the corridors of this wonderful castle, the design of which is said to have been the inspiration for the cas­ tle in Walt Disney’s “Snow White and the seven Dwarfs".

Salamanca is not too far away. This city revolves round the biggest Plaza Mayor (Town square) in the country. One cathedral simply wasn’t big enough. Visit the old uni­ versity building with ornate walls which con­ ceal the famous engraving of a frog on a

skull. It is really hard to spot. See if you can see it. Being a university town, this city is full of younger people giving the city a sense of vibrancy.

Then on to Avila.

Seen from a distance the meticulously preserved 2,500 metres of city walls with 88 towers and several city gates just has to be one of the most romantic sights in Spain.

Storks nesting on the towers add the charm of this ancient city. Visit the smaller but equally exciting cathedral or the shrine of the irrepressible patron Saint of all Spain, Santa Teresa.

Finally – Pastrana.

Patrana is a lovely little village set amongst rolling hills covered in all sorts of trees You can do this journey with David’s Coachtrips SL for only 199€ HB. Based in beautiful Segovia with daily outings this excursion is superb value for money. Dates available 2014. 4 days 23­26 September and 27­30 October.

Reserve online at www.coachtripsonline.com or call direct on 966785910.

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Friday, September 5, 2014

editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS A sign of the times as Elche settle the snore...

Stressed out by fear of Ryanscare I READ Donna Gee’s article regard­ ing her experience with Ryanair and Monarch and agree with everything she wrote.

I use Ryanair all the time, but must confess that if an alternative airline is €20 more I will go with the alternative, just because of the customer service.

I then read all the responses to the article and am somewhat con­ fused.

Everybody has an opinion about everything and it’s great to hear other people’s views and experi­ ences. But can someone advise or show me where in the Terms & Conditions it clearly states that passengers will be treated in such a manner that makes you feel like

a criminal, third­rate citizen and cause you as much stress as we can. Please advise.

If people take the time to read Donna’s comments and many oth­ ers, the main complaint is cus­ tomer service, the attitude of the cabin staff and the lack of good English, which is below any acceptable level of customer serv­ ice.

Michael O’Leary (pictured right) even agrees that customer service is unacceptable. So to all those who write ‘comply with the T/Cs’, take a moment and read what has been written. Ryanair provide affordable travel. Period.

KEITH SMITH Pilar de la Horadada

CANCER FIGHT BOOST

SEVERAL weeks ago I wrote an article called ‘Why I Am Not Going To Watch Elche This Season’ which provoked some interest.

Any lingering doubts I had were immediately dis­ missed when I (eventually!) saw details of Elche’s first home game of the season: Sunday night, kick­off 11 pm!

What planet are these people on, you’d get home after one o’clock in the morning – do they expect children to go?

Words fail me…

JOHN Mcgregor

Life can be so hard to stomach...

GRUMPY Gran wrote a story going back a while about here stomach/bowel problems and I seem to recall it is similar to what I am suffering at the moment.

I would be grateful of the back issue number so I can re­read the article if that is at all possible.

CHRIS SMITHSON

q

The Torrevieja branch of the Asociation Espanola Contra el Cancer, AECC, was recently pre­ sented with the sum of 2350 euros by members of El Raso based Ruby’s Golf Society. The money was raised in recognition of the work carried out by AECC’s Torrevieja Hospital Volunteers in supporting Daren

Finucane, a founder member of the Golf Society, after recent cancer operations and chemotherapy follow up. Ruby’s Golf Society decided to support the volunteers by organising fund­raising for AECC. The main event was a barbecue, raffle and auction of golfing items, which took place at Ruby's Bar. Money

was also raised with a golf event sponsored by local businesses, who also chipped in with addi­ tional support by providing raffle prizes and auction items. AECC would like to thank Ruby's Golf Society's committee and their wives for their generosity. A big thank you goes to the sponsors and the people who donated

money and prizes for their gen­ erosity too.

The photo shows AECC Hospital Volunteer Ann Bissett receiving the donation from for­ mer patient Daren Finucane on her right and Ruby's Golf Society committee member James McCarthy.

Grumpy Old Gran (Donna Gee) com­ ments: Chris, I’m not sure which article you are refer­ ring to so am emailing you direct to obtain more infor­ mation. I have two grand­ daughters with Crohn’s Disease (both in remission at present), my only sister has Celiac Disease and my younger daughter suffers from irritable bowel syn­ drome. My own digestive system has had its own weird programme since I was 10 years old. So the family has a pretty good grasp of the subject and I am sure I can point you in the right direction...

PLEASE PROVIDE AN ADDRESS AND CONTACT NUMBER (NOT FOR PUBLICATION) WITH YOUR CONTRIBUTIONS TO THE LETTERS PAGE

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Friday, September 5, 2014

THE PURR-ICE IS WRONG, PET

HOW NOW BROWN SOW: Charlie may be getting a new partner

22 reasons why I spend too much on my pigging cats DO you ever wonder whether cats and dogs have the power of speech but keep shtum to avoid being put to work?

Food bills are a pet problem in Casa Donna, which is why I spend half my life lugging trolleyloads of animal grub around Mercadona.

I’m convinced my cats understand both Spanish and English as well as their own un­purr­nouncable lan­ guage. Catatonic, I think it’s called.

The whiskered ones are also as foxy as Basil Brush. They know that the moment they utter a recognisible word, I’ll have them working as inter­ preters to help pay the mogg­age.

So they just eat, sleep and play while muggins seeks ways of claiming animal meals allowance.

It's not so much the cost of feeding Sid the ferret pre­ my black beauties, Tom, Dick and pares to make his Molly (Molly's the odd one out in every mark on Mark... way). A menagerie of feral visitors have also adopted the cat flap in my scullery door as an access point to a never­ending sup­ ply of edible gold.

Molly is the one excep­ tion. She doesn't do cat Mark, Judith, Jack and Josey Heyes share flaps, queues or being nice their rural residence in La Marina with a to other creatures. total of 22 traditional and exotic pets. This ''Cat flaps hurt my head,'' is is the full Zoo’s Who... her lame excuse (she’s also DOGS - German Shepherd (Roxy), St got arthritis in her legs).

Bernard (Bernie), Burmese Mountain Dog ''That's surprising since (Teddy). there's nothing inside your CATS - Jasper, Niggy, Flash, Gemma, head,'' is my answer. ''And Michael and Molly, plus three yet-to-beyou've just given away the named kittens born this summer. fact you can talk. Here are Pot-Belly Pig - (Charlie). Tarantula - (Lola). the car keys ­ go and do the Bearded Dragons - (Bane and Athena). shopping.''

Some hope. Molly is as Tortoises - (Fred and Wilma). Terrapin bad as the rest of them. Just (Crusty). wants to sleep all day, eat all Ferrets - (Johnny and Sid). night, and spend the in­ Toad - (Toadmandu). between time cleaning her­ LATE ENTRY: Iggy the iguana died last winter. self. It makes me lick (sick as

THE HEYES ZOO’S WHO...

Iggy the Iguana: He died a few months ago

Bernie checks out a Kitten’s Got Talent contender

CRICKET, ANYONE? Bane and Athena prepare to play a straight bite well) that while the cats laze about, I fork out at least 50 evros a week to keep them in the luxury they demand.

So I was staggered to dis­ cover that my friends Mark and Judith Heyes spend only HALF that amount on food for their TWENTY­TWO pets.

The Guardamar garage owner and his wife share their La Marina finca with three dogs, six cats and three kittens, plus 10 exotic creatures including a Vietnamese pot­belly pig, a tarantula, two bearded drag­ ons and a toad.

And Judith insists the total weekly bill to feed all of them is just 25 evros.

Clearly I’ve gone wrong somewhere, or my cat colony is even cleverer than I thought.

Back in the Heyes finca, son Jack keeps a supply of crickets padded up to bat against bearded dragons

DOG AT WORK: Roxy on office duty

Dane and Athena. in a game they can’t win. Most go in feet first and perish LBC (leg before cricket, that is.

Add to Lola's website Charlie the Vietnamese pot­ belly pig, tortoises Fred and Wilma, terrapin Crusty and toad Todmandu, and you have the embryo of a mini visitors' centre which could benefit animal charities as well as entertain inquisitive youngsters.

Mark and Judith discov­ ered the animal within long before they moved from Tyneside to Spain in 2002.

Back in South Shields, their pets included three Great Danes and a snake.

Mark is currently working on a swimming pool for Crusty the terrapin ­ and future additions to the family may well see Charlie getting a new partner.

Mark owned a garage in South Shields for 15 years

before relocating to Spain and establishing himself as a top mobile mechanic in this part of the Costa Blanca.

He set up the Performance & Diesel Centre in 2007.

At home in La Marina, it was already raining cats and dogs, not to mention pigs and toads, as the pet colony heaed for satura­ tion point.

Says Judith: ''Having built up his reputation as a mobile mechanic. Mark decided he needed a base to work from, other than our garden!. ''So he found a large unit in Guardamar which is now equipped with four vehicle lifts, latest diagnostic equip­ ment, and everything you need to run a successful business.

‘It’s worked out very well for us. But you’re spending too much on your cat food, pet.’’

8

Friday, September 5, 2014

Friday, September 5, 2014

9

10

Friday, September 5, 2014

MRS. MOP CLEANS UP WHAT a shock we got at the pub the other evening.

Would you believe another stranger came through the door ­­ the third in just a few weeks. That is the third stranger not the third door.

Blimey, I'm rambling already and it's only the first paragraph.

Anyway, what was particu­ larly startling about the latest visitor was that this stranger was . . . er . . . a strangeress.

Yes, dear readers, a woman had entered our small mas­ culine world ­­ our haven for the hairy, our retreat for the rugged, our sanctuary for the . . . well, you get my drift.

Please don't get me wrong. The members of the pub discussion group adore the ladies. It's just that they frighten us, too.

The first female we ever saw in our male domain was Daft Barry's mother. She had come looking for her son because he hadn't eaten all of his tea before he had left the house an hour earlier and she was worried he might

lose weight and plunge down a grid.

Daft Barry's mother wor­ shipped her son and Daft Barry revered his mum. She demonstrated her worship of him by constantly cooking him large, stodgy meals and he showed his reverence for her by scoffing all that was put before him after first smothering the always giant­ sized plates with brown sauce, toma­ to ketchup and Dijon mustard. One could say with safe certainty that Daft Barry con­ sumed his food with relish.

One might also say that Daft Barry was gargantuan­ sized and moved about very slowly because of his vast girth. Only that would be a lie. Daft Barry was, in fact, whippet­thin and ultra­fast on his feet.

I suspect that he had a rapid metabolism. However,

his enzyme­catalysed reac­ tions ended somewhere in the region of his thinking equipment. For Daft Barry's brain was slow to metabolise conversation.

Don't get me wrong, the guy was not stupid; he was more sort of innocent, unso­ phisticated, artless, ingenu­

ous, inexperienced, guile­ less, unworldly, childlike, trusting, wide­eyed, unaffect­ ed and unpretentious. As is plain to see, it is difficult to find a word to describe him.

For instance, when Daft Barry first came into the pub and intimated that he would like to join our small band of merry intellectuals, we decid­ ed to set him an initiation test. 'Do me a favour, Barry,' said Dave the barman.

'Would you go to the cup­ board round the back and fetch me the left­handed mop.'

Daft Barry disappeared without question or hesi­ tation and we all gig­ gled and chortled at his naivety ­­ until he returned merely moments later clutch­ ing what he claimed was the aforemen­ tioned left­handed mop.

Each of us in turn scrutinised the object and, try as we might, could

find nothing that would dis­ pute Daft Barry's declaration that it was indeed the requested southpaw cleans­ ing implement. We burst into applause for Daft Barry and welcomed him as an official member of the pub discus­ sion group.

So where was I? Oh, yes, the episode of the stranger­ ess the other evening.

Before all us menfolk could flee in fear from the premis­ es, the female intruder strode up to the bar and spoke.

'My name is Andromeda Arkwright. I have just moved into the area and intend to join your band of brothers. I am a sweet and lovable per­ son but if any of you upset me I shall eat you for break­ fast!'

None of us caught Andromeda's cheeky little wink. Indeed, Daft Barry screamed: 'She's a cannibal!'

The shriek woke up Ol' Red Eyes who hissed into my ear: 'Get her to take the initiation test.' I hissed back: 'Are you kidding me? Send

this dame for the left­handed mop and she'll wipe the floor with us.'

Andromeda thrust out her hand to Dave the barman who observed: 'Andromeda is not a common name around here, Andromeda, even though I've just uttered it twice in one sentence.'

Our guest smiled at Dave the barman. 'It's actually of Greek origin and means "ruler of men." But don't let that put you off. Might I order now? Drinks all round, mein host. And would you kindly introduce your friends to me.'

Whatever fears we had felt melted away at the offer of the free round. Within min­ utes we were all great mates.

Apart from Daft Barry who was still quaking in his galoshes.

'Whatever's the matter, Barry?' we asked in unison.

'This nice lady is one of us now.'

Daft Barry looked down at the floor, gulped and whis­ pered into my ear: 'I think I need the mop.'

11

Friday, September 5, 2014

Top choir seeks new members Melody Makers International, who for the last five years have been the most suc­ cessful choir on the Costa, are seeking new members to swell their ranks for the new season starting 9th September.

The choir, under the direction of profes­ sional singer, conductor and vocal tutor, Nigel Hopkins, regularly sings to audi­ ences of 1,000 in the fabulous Orihuela Costa Resort. They are accompanied by a professional band flown in specially from the UK. Known also as the Friendly Choir because of the warm welcome given to

new members, and the fun rehearsals which reap such excellent results, the group is embarking on it's next show, enti­ tled 'Music of the Night' ­ and rehearsals start on 9th September at the Asturias Restaurante. These take place from 5.30pm ­ 7.30pm each Tuesday.

Any singers who would like to be involved in this experience should come along to a rehearsal, or telephone 966 775 976 for further details. Anyone with a voice who can sing in tune is welcome as full training is given by our leading voice coach and conductor.

SADDLE UP FOR ELCHE KIDS

By Andrew Atkinson

Elche Children’s Home will benefit from the Charity Horse and Flamenco Show spectacu­ lar at Casa la Pedrera, Torremendo on Saturday September 13th.

"Jay Markwick's Company of Dancers, Emma Tytherleigh and Juan Cortez are perform­ ing in this special show for the Elche youngsters”, said house owner, Jenni Ray. “It promises to be a magical evening set in a sunset backdrop with amaz­ ing horses and wonderful Flamenco enthralling audi­ ences with dance, drama, daring and fires.”

Jenni's daughter's Eden and Linzi were in action last month at the Horse and Flamenco show performing some fabulous vaulting tricks on their horse Aero, who had been out

BIG RAFFLE REWARDS Generous passengers using Torrevieja­ based David Coachtrips have provided a big boost of other eight thousand euros for the company’s designated charity, the Alzheimer’s Association. 8,296 euros was raised over the last year by travellers buy­ ing up raffle tickets, with a five day Benidorm Xmas break and a 15 day Mediterranean cruise as the top prizes.

Myra Macrae from The Courier drew the winning ticket for the cruise, which was won

by William Maginnes of Elche.

BUCKET OF CHEER

The MABS Cancer Support group for Murcia and the Mar Menor is the latest local group to get involved with trying to get some brave souls to try for the Ice Bucket challenge.

Many local people who have gone for it have nominated MABS as their beneficiary with one of the first to go for it being Mark McCluskey from La Rosa Bar in San Cayetano.

A MABS spokesperson said:­ "Awareness of MABS is higher than ever due to the power of the internet, especially Facebook, and we thank every single person who did the Ice Bucket Challenge for MABS. Every euro goes towards help­ ing cancer patients and their families to make life a little bit easier at what is a very frightening time."

If you wish to donate or upload your video here is the page to do it https://www.facebook.com/mabsmurciamarmenor don't forget #icebucketchallenge4mabs

of action, and enjoyed a glorious return to wowing the audience once more!

Tickets will be 12 euros for adults; six euros for children and a family ticket for two adults and two children works out at 30 euros.

BEST FRIENDS TRAINED

Some proud dog owners and of course the animals themselves have been picking up their obedience course certificates and prizes after the latest round of classes from the Campoverde Canine Club. The CCC has been going for 14 years and over that time many owners have benefited from expert tuition, from a Home Office improved instructor. New courses will be starting very soon and of you are interested in training your four legged friend, then phone Roy on 966 762 265 or email:­campoverdecanineclub@outlook.com

FREE FOR LAUGHS

The musical version of the hit TV comedy, Are You Being Served, is set to hit the stage next month at San Miguel’s Casa del Cultura, as the Campoverde Theatre Group put on I’m Free.

This production will follow the same format as their recent successful show, Di de Di which gained some excellent reviews from enthusiastic audiences. I’m Free will feature the birthday celebrations of Young Mr.Grace with a variety of familiar sixties songs that will get everybody in the audience joining in.

The production will run from Friday October 10th through tlll Sunday October

12th with curtain up at 7.30pm. Tickets are now available from Colin on 966 774 127 and Bargain Books in San Miguel.

If you enjoy singing, then the Casa Tom Community Choir would love to hear from you. This new group will be starting their autumn rehearsals this Monday September 8th at 2.00pm in the San Luis area of Torrevieja. Everybody is welcome

join the choir and there are no auditions, with men and women of all ages wel­ come.

For more information call or e­mail Terry on 647 189 135 or casatomsan­ luis@gmail.com

TOM’S WELCOME

CAUSE FOR CONCERN

Age Concern have had to close their information office at Playa Flamenca Town Hall, due to a lack of volunteers. Anyone wishing to contact Age Concern can still use the Playa Flamenca published tele­ phone number of 697 176 154 or they can call the Day Centre in La Siesta, Torrevieja on 966 786 887.

12

Friday, September 5, 2014

WHY THE AGGRESSION? LITTLE LULU NEEDS HELP

I am often asked quickfire questions by people wanting advice about their dogs, the most com­ mon being, “How do I stop my dog from being aggressive”?

Many people think the answer will be quick and decisive, but there is no one answer to one question when it comes to dogs. The reason for this is because everything is connected and everything you do with your dog will have a particular meaning.

As an example, take a dog that is showing signs of aggres­ sion. I have to look at many aspects of what and how the human is interacting with the dog, to find out where the prob­ lem lies. All of the following need to be discussed: How are you exercising the dog and how often, how are you correcting the dog, at what times are you giving affection, the recall, separation anxiety, what happens at feeding times, along with one of the most important aspects, which is, the emotions and thoughts of the human, not just when they are

with their dogs, but when they are on their own.

So, as you can see, there can never be a quickfire answer.

Take us, the human race, for example. Many of the problems we go through in life are not down to one specific aspect.

There will be many facets that contribute to a certain prob­ lem or negative emotion. It could be how we were raised, the environment we are now living in, the people around us, a medical problem, constantly living your life at 150 miles per hour, a lack of understanding to your situation or a certain situation and many more.

When I say to people that they need to book a consultation or attend one of my seminars, to gain a complete under­ standing of their dogs and the answers to the problems they are experiencing, I do not suggest this for the benefit of my bank account. I am simply not made that way.

My goal is to make sure that all of my clients, after a consul­ tation, or seminar, have a very clear and easy to understand route of how to gain calm, balance and peace for both human and dog. That is why the average time I spend in a consultation is four and a half hours and one of my latest con­ sultations lasted seven hours.

Learning a new language is fascinating, but learning the language of your dog, who has stood by you faithfully for many years is mind­blowing for my clients, who begin to look at their dogs and life in a com­ pletely new and positive way.

You can only gain a successful relationship with a dog, or even another human being, when you understand the whole pic­ ture and not just part of it.

This week we rescued Lulu, a tiny female dog, around four years old, in one of the worst ever condi­ tions I have ever seen. These pho­ tos will speak for themselves. She has exposed skin, sores, ulcers and many other ailments.

It will take months of our dedicated care to get Lulu back to full health. We are a new registered charity and we are struggling for funding. We now have 28 animals under our care and the bills, especially vet bills can be very high each month, due to the level of treatment many of the animals we have need. We have collection tins that can be placed in bars etc…. and if you would be kind enough to have one of these tins on our behalf, please get in touch with me.

We are working tirelessly on behalf of these wonderful ani­ mals and there are many now waiting to come into our care.

Please donate if you can and the details are below. This is a serious plea for funding. www.thedogyouneed.com is a registered charity, where we rehabilitate the most severely abused animals. Our charity registration number is 1157175. If you would be kind enough to donate anything to this special cause you can do by Paypal, where the account details are peter@thedogy­ ouneed.com or to our Nat West charity account, where the sort code is 60­16­03 and the account number is 73754900.

Thank you.

PETS’ CORNER: CAN YOU TAKE IN A HOMELESS DOG OR CAT? Our beautiful Balu is a very happy and playful little kitten. Seen alone in a gar­ den he was rescued and after being examined by our vet he is now in a foster home and offered for adop­ tion. He is approx 10 weeks old and very sociable. Call: 645 469 253. www.petsin­ spain.com

Born in May 2012 Drake is a small tabby male. He is a lovely cat, but is very unhappy and stressed living in the APAH Cattery with lots of other cats. He would be much happier in a home environment and would make a lovely cat for some­ one wanting affection. To meet him and the other APAH cats, please call 630 422 563 or 616 210 850.

Balu Mamma is about 2 years old she is a small to medium size Podenco cross, she is such an amazing girl with the most beautiful brown eyes. She is very easy going and is great with people and other dogs. She is house trained and very well behaved and currently living in a foster home. Please call 650 304 746 or Email: p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmai l.com

Mamma

Drake ROCCO was found at the side of a main road late one evening scavenging for food; he was very thin, full of ticks and had very inflamed skin. He has undergone treatment and he has also put on some weight. Rocco is a happy boy who has lots of energy and loves to play; he has been fully vaccinated, micro chipped and castrated and still only young at one year old. Please contact the ken­ nels directly on 966710047 or email info@satanimalres­ cue.com

Billy Rocco Heidi is such a sweet little girl, she was 1 of 300 dogs in a house in Murcia that needed urgent rescue, she crawled up to us on her tummy as we were leaving the house where we had already rescued 10 dogs and we couldn’t leave her.

She is around 6 months old, weighs about 6 kilos and will be medium size when fully grown. Call: 645 469 253. www.petsinspain.com

Ellie only has one back leg, but it doesn't stop her running around. Her story is shocking, not only could her owner have saved her leg if he had acted in time, but after her leg had to be amputated, he abandoned her to an uncertain future by telling the police that he had found her. Fortunately for Ellie she was recognised and the whole sorry story came out. She is a lovely girl who needs a far better home than she had. To meet Ellie, please call 630 422 563 or 616 210 850.

Heidi Born in February 2012, Billy and Bobby are large but very gentle dogs. They were rescued by APAH as small puppies and have never known a home envi­ ronment, but they would make wonderful family dogs.

To arrange to meet the brothers, please call 630 422 563 or 616 210 850.

Ellie Surely there must be a retirement home some­ where for this very loving very well behaved girl, Estrella is 10 years old and she came to our attention when the vet called to say a

hunter had brought her in and wanted to put her down.

We could not let that happen so we took her on. She is a lovely dog that loves being with people and will follow you around or sit with you.

Please telephone the PEPA helpline on 650 304 746 or email p.e.p.a.animalchari­ ty@gmail.com

Estrella

She is about 1 year old very placid and affectionate.

Good with other dogs and children, loves sitting on your lap and snuggling up to you. Curly Sue is a small dog, she was given her name because her tail curls over her back. Please con­ tact K9 or PHONE 600 84 54 20 for more info www.k9club.es

Curly Sue

Friday, September 5, 2014

13

STRANGE BUT TRUE

NOT LOVING IT CRISPI BACON NO KIDDING!

A McDonald's branch in Arizona has become the first of its kind after scrap­ ping the company's Golden Arches in favour of a turquoise letter 'M'.

The move came about after officials in Arizona said the restaurant would not be allowed to open unless the corporation came up with a compromise.

Strict laws in the city of Sedona state that no build­ ing is allowed to ruin the views of the state's sur­ rounding desert.

The idea for the turquoise sign was raised and subse­ quently approved to hang on the side of the eatery's build­ ing, which also abides by a strict colour code having been built using orange and red materials.

While the unusual move is the first time a McDonald's restaurant has opened it's

doors without it's famous yellow logo outside, it is not the only abnormal storefront within the company's 30,000 branches.

Perhaps the most surpris­ ing location you can find a McDonald's in would be the one located within notorious detention camp Guantanamo Bay. Surrounded by barbed wire it doesn't look particularly invit­ ing, despite the blue skies and palm trees in the back­ ground. The outlet is only accessible to the base's per­ sonnel and is the only McDonald's in Cuba.

A woman whose last name is Crispi has been accused of try­ ing to burn down her ex­ boyfriend's house by inten­ tionally leaving a pound of bacon on the stove.

Cameo Crispi is alleged to have purposely left the meat on a lit burner.

Police said the 32­year­ old, from Vernal, Utah, called and sent text messages to her former flame throughout the alleged incident, com­ pelling him to call 911.

On arrival, officers found smoke streaming out of the front door, hot coals on the floor and a pound of "severe­ ly burned bacon" inside the property.

A police report said of the incident: "I asked to come in and observed a wood stove left open with a fire burning inside and hot coals on the floor around the stove."

"I observed the burner to be on the setting “High” and the bacon to be severely burned and smoking badly."

Crispi, who was four times

over the legal drink­driving limit, will stand trial on charges of arson and burgla­ ry when she returns to court in October.

L o n d o n Underground com­ muters were stunned when a GOAT casu­ ally strolled through the ticket barrier.

The horned brown goat named Barney, from Vauxhall City Farm, was spotted at Vauxhall Station by City workers on Thursday morning.

But don't worry, goats aren't taking over the world just yet ­ it turns out it was a publicity stunt to promote Transport for London's first above ground map of the Victoria line.

14

Friday, September 5, 2014

MANCUNIAN MAYHEM

During a recent trip to Manchester, I found myself in the middle of a big shopping hub, with the Arndale Centre at the core featuring different stores selling all your needs, from food to bags and everything in­ between!

I stumbled along the road dragging behind me a slowly breaking suitcase fighting my way through the hoards of people, all apparently with the same idea as me, which was to get into as many shops as possible in the shortest time!

My excuse was that I had a flight to catch, but I had no idea what was going through the minds of these people at my side!

Upon my arrival in the UK, the weather, as I stepped from the plane, was cold and overcast with a hint of rain, but once I had reached the centre, I found the sun had come out and there was quite a warm feel to the air, which was quite something for Manchester! My cardigan began to heat me a bit too much as I scurried along from the train station to the Arndale, and once inside I knew exactly where to go and I managed to finish my shop from a fortnight earlier, stocking up on classroom bits and pieces, although I didn´t manage to get anything for my son. I was sure he would understand, it was a hurried visit after all, and understand he did.

My words this week are not about my exploits at spending as much money as I could in the shortest time possible, but it is about the sheer volume of people ambling along the road in an area of the UK which I believe isn´t the most affluent in the country. If Europe is supposed to be in the middle of a

recession, what is happening to the locals? How do they have such disposable income that they can afford to pop out on a Wednesday afternoon to spend, spend, spend? I am sure that I´m doing some people a great injustice, as there were some on lunch breaks, whilst others were travelling like me or some maybe meeting friends for a coffee and chat, but I was surprised at the sheer volume. My afternoon was spent dodging folk like my son tries to dodge homework, and as I was lugging my ever expanding case behind me this was far from easy!

Maybe I have just been spoiled, as living in Spain I´m not used to having to push through crowds when I want to go somewhere, I can usually walk around my local shopping centre freely and in a relaxed mood. I do like the UK shopping areas, as they seem to have some­ thing the Spanish ones don´t, and I believe it´s the type of shops that exist in the UK. For example, I love bookshops and of course pound shops and these are abundant over there, something which is sadly lacking here in Spain. In fact apart from my girls, the shops are the only other thing that makes a British visit bearable.

I would have loved to have asked a lot of the people where they were going and what they were doing in Manchester city centre? I am still amazed by the huge amount and can´t help but wonder, is there a recession going on there? Are the people there feeling the pinch as much as we are in Spain? To see that type of crowd on a Saturday would have surprised me, but to see it mid­week, albeit in the middle of August was unexpected. I sup­ pose it´s good in a way that people are spending their money, milling around with all the time in the world to do whatever they want , but it takes me back to my question of how? I guess I will never know, for now I am just happy to be back in sunny Spain, enjoying my occasional shopping days in peace, able to walk where I want without worrying about pushchairs running me over or bags hitting me on the legs, and looking forward to the next time I have to fight my way through the shops. Maybe next time, I’ll go and I´ll get some shin pads and be more prepared!

15

Friday, September 5, 2014

SEASIDE SHUFFLE

Who’d have thought that good old Clacton on Sea would be thrust into the limelight of British politics after the shock announce­ ment that their local Tory MP has switched to UKIP and will force a by­elec­ tion?

Clacton’s best known for being a seaside resort that was home to one of the first Butlin’s holiday camps, and for fans of history, the area unearthed the oldest wooden spear to be found in Britain: ­ way back in 1911 and given the somewhat obvious name of the Clacton Spear!

A dagger might be a more appropriate object that David Cameron and the Tories will be looking for, in order to stab defector Douglas Carswell who has given UKIP a blinding coup that will have very serious implica­ tions for the Conservatives between now and the General Election in the Spring. UKIP boss Nigel Farage looked like a school­

boy who had kissed his first girlfriend when he sat along­ side Carswell when he made his announcement. He even said that Carswell’s act in resigning and stand­ ing again in a by­ election was the most principled polit­ ical act that he has ever come across.

Farage must have then conveniently forgotten that ex­ Tory leadership con­ tender David Davis stood down back in 2008 to force a by­ election over the issue of civil liberties, but there is a link between Davis and Carswell. Both knew they were onto a winner.

Principles are all very well, but Douglas Carswell is no fool. A popular figure in the media who would always have plenty to say in slag­ ging off David Cameron in

front of the cameras, he has built up a powerful personal base in Clacton since he first became an MP in 2005, and he’s done the maths in working out that he’ll walk the by­election for UKIP. In fact an opinion poll last weekend suggested that he would get an astonishing two­thirds of the vote when it

comes to the election! It’s a lot easier to be principled when you know that your self­preservation is a straight­forward matter, as opposed to being in a mar­ ginal seat where you have to play a different sort of game!

That’s why some Tories are scared to jump into the UKIP fold, but a runaway win for

Carswell may get them to change their mind. UKIP also get a big bonus of a new standard bearer, who has some great intellectual qualities, as opposed to the somewhat ragbag collection of buffoons that have embarrassed Farage on numerous occasions.

Farage is claiming that

there are Labour MPs planning to jump ship but I don’t buy into that, unless he quickly produces a rabbit out of the hat to silence the doubters. Why should they switch as they are onto a winner right now?

Ed Miliband and Labour, despite the big improvements in the UK economy, are a racing certainty to be the largest party at the next General Election as crucial Tory votes get siphoned into the UKIP bucket, as well boundary changes that favour Labour. And that’s the massive irony about all of this. Labour will not have a referendum over the EU, whilst the Tories will, yet UKIP are going to ensure that Ed Miliband will be the next Prime Minister.

Anti­EU voters need to remember that when they cast their ballots next May.

WHAT TO DO IF YOU’VE BEEN BURGLED. Statistics in Spain Crime rates in Spain remain among the lowest in the EU according to the latest Interior Ministry crime report. However, since the economic crisis began in 2008, there has been a steep increase in domestic burglaries and theft as a result. In 2012 the number of bur­ glaries in homes rose by 25.4%. The message to expat residents is not to panic. There are some simple precautions to take, as you would back in the UK, such as fitting security grills, installing exterior lights and alarms, being careful about what content is posted on social networks, especially anything to do with trips and holidays away from home. It also helps to take out a quality home insurance policy that will cover your home and its con­ tents should any unfortunate incident occur.

When you discover you’ve been burgled As soon as you discover you’ve been burgled, whether it’s a break­in or theft at your home, first call the police. Don’t touch anything until they arrive. A police report will be needed to process your claim.

Then secure your home to avoid further damage, board up any broken windows, make a list of damaged or missing belongings, detail the damage to your home resulting from the burglary, taking photographs of damaged windows or door.

At this point, you can call the claims department of your home insurance company. We advise you to have your policy on hand when you call.

Peace-of-mind with Linea Directa We understand that your peace­of­mind is important, especially in your home. Our claims department will take a full statement of the circumstances of the incident. We will check the insurance coverage with you explaining all the procedures. If emergency repairs are required from locksmiths to glaziers, we will help you swiftly handle your claim and get things back to normal as soon as possible. Fortunately, incidents of theft in Spain are rel­ atively small compared to other EU countries, however should you be burgled, your home­ owner’s insurance policy will cover the loss or destruction of personal property if it’s stolen from your home.

Hold-up outside the home In many cases, your home insurance policy may cover you for any incidents that occur outside your home. Should you be the victim of a hold­up outside your premises your per­ sonal belongings are covered. We will ensure replacement documents are quickly and efficiently dealt with, and if required, arrange the locks on your home to be changed.

We hope the information provided in this article is of interest.

If you would like to contact Linea Directa please call 902 123 161 More information on Linea Directa online at www.lineadirecta.com

16

Friday, September 5, 2014

A WAKE UP CALL FOR THE NHS

Have you experienced the rollercoaster of emotions as we have over the heart­ breaking story of Ashya King, the five­year­old boy with a brain tumour spirit­ ed away from Southampton Hospital?

First we heard the parents had, against advice of doc­ tors, taken the boy out of the facility. And we thought, crazy parents, here we go again:­ parents knowing bet­ ter than doctors perhaps due to the internet, where people on the make put all kinds of money­making things. Next we heard they were Jehovah´s Witnesses and thought, people putting their religious beliefs above the needs of their own son.

Then we heard the reason why the couple had snatched their son from the hospital and drove him to Spain was they could not get him the treatment they believed could give him the best possible chance of sur­ vival. It was at this point that public opinion changed.

Were the police right to demand an international arrest warrant against the family? Had the doctors at the hospital been as straightforward as they should have been in disclos­ ing what the family actually wanted and were being denied to them in Britain?

Was Ashya´s condition real­ ly as critical as the doctors were claiming or were they simply covering their backs?

I have no criticism against the police. Sadly, they have been pilloried over this but they did everything right. It appeared to be an over­ zealous reaction from the Crown Prosecution Service who issued an extradition

warrant for the Kings, who were then separated from their child and forced in front of a Madrid judge.

Fortunately reason pre­ vailed, but all this asks a really big question. Are we falling victim into still believ­ ing that the NHS and British doctors are the be all and end all of medical expertise?

I´m beginning to think not.

What the parents of Ashya wanted was pioneering new cancer treatment called pro­ ton beam therapy, which directs charged particles instead of X­rays to deliver radiotherapy to cancer patients.

Instead of a mass of X­ rays which does so much harm to surrounding tissues, this pin­pointing directs radiotherapy only to the tumour, giving it a maximum zap. Makes plenty of sense to me. In general, it gives fewer side­effects compared to high energy X­ray treat­ ments. It can be used to treat spinal cord tumours, sarcomas near the spine or brain, prostate cancer, lung cancer, liver cancer and some children's cancers. In December 2011, the UK Department of Health said that proton therapy will be made available for patients in London and Manchester from 2018. 2018? That´s four years away. It´s needed NOW in Britain. It´s not good enough Cameron. Not good enough NHS, not good enough British government.

Is it yet another example of the NHS being starved of money and providing a sec­ ond class service? Other countries are pioneering this therapy NOW. That´s why this couple wanted to get their son to a country which

is clearly overtaking Britain and its struggling NHS. The NHS said the medical treatment costs around £100,000, but the figure is based on sending someone to the US. There are also numerous centres providing this treatment in Europe where the treatment can cost less than £20,000. The NHS is increasingly falling behind. We know that in Spain you go to the medical centre and the doctor con­ nects directly onto the hospi­ tal computer and confirms an appointment for X­rays, tests, etc, there and then and gets the results back in days. In Britain this rigma­ role takes weeks. While in Britain part of my tooth fell out. I asked for an appoint­ ment at an NHS dentist. I was told there was a three week waiting list. "Now tell me how long I have to wait if I am prepared to be a private patient with you," I asked the receptionist. "Come straight away," I was told. Choice?

Yes, only if you have money.

Anyway, Britain and the NHS has, in my opinion, lost the plot. We have that horri­ ble Quango called NICE which decides which treat­ ment is cost effective and can be approved for NHS use and what is too expen­ sive. In my world, not a NICE Quango at all.

Southampton Hospital has said that throughout Ashya's admission they had conversations about the treatment options available to him, and they offered the family access to a second opinion, as well as assis­ tance with organising treat­ ment abroad. So, perhaps, the family, in taking him out of hospital, was premature

and they should have explored the hospital's offers ­ giving the story to newspa­ pers to ensure the best pos­ sible outcome under the full glare of publicity. What is going wrong with the NHS in Britain? In my opinion it is because it is in "competition" with private medicine.

People with money can opt out and go private, as I did to get my tooth repaired within hours. If they had to go into the NHS like everyone else, and had difficulty returning to the UK after being a med­ ical tourist overseas, just think how good the NHS would be. Gone would be delays in getting treatment; gone would be badly pre­ sented, bland foods; quickly gone would be the risk of infections due to bad hygiene. Why, because peo­ ple with mega bucks and political clout would make sure it was second to none, even though they were pro­ viding it for all rather than just themselves.

We´ve got a first class health system for the rich who can afford to go private, and a second class system for everyone else. This class system has gone on far too long and must end. Perhaps then the vast majority of people in Britain will again have full confidence in the NHS; it will once again be the envy of the world, and the likes of Ashya´s parents won´t have to think they have to drive thousands of miles to get the best treat­ ment.

Husbands who con­ stantly criticise their wives over their weight or appearance may be guilty of domestic abuse! It´s Labour

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at it again ­ this time in the shape of Seema Malhotra, Labour’s new shadow anti domestic violence minister spouting off. OK, yes, she has a point, control freak husbands who manipulate their wives and constantly put them down by banging on about over­eating and their size, drinking, or what they wear is, over time, abu­ sive and criminal. But why is it always the husbands who are the guilty ones and the poor downtrodden wives always the victims?

Come off it! Come on men, let´s redress the bal­ ance here. Let´s start com­ plaining to the authorities about the constant barrage of complaints we have to contend with amounting to domestic abuse from wives, girlfriends, partners. Let´s face it, you women have a field day at complaining.

About over­hanging waist­ lines, about men sitting around the house doing nothing, not putting clothes in cupboards, not cleaning the house, about having hobbies you women are not interested in, not taking them shopping, not giving them enough money to sat­ isfy every need (no, not need, want) concerning our­ selves about money (yes, often it´s the men who have to keep you) rather than concentrating on them, not buying them flowers, choco­ lates, expensive jewellery every five minutes, not tak­ ing them on expensive holi­ days... (and I haven´t even mentioned the agonies over the bedroom department).

Need I go on? Isn´t all that

domestic abuse, soppy Seema? Next time you rant off, put your brain in gear.

Fellas, if you want a reason why not to vote Labour next year, Seema is it!

Now let’s turn to anoth­ er section of society which should be driven to extinction ­ travellers.

These apologies for humanity cause trouble wherever they go, trespass­ ing onto private land, leaving piles of litter and other filth behind and touring nearby villages for work, more often than not charging far too much for substandard jobs.

All the time they are living on the cheap, avoiding council tax and all the other taxes everyone else has to pay.

What has particularly angered my wife and I last week, was a set of travellers who took over a piece of waste land beside a country road in the UK. They had a caravan, awning, another caravan for sale, a two­ wheeled trap, a couple of vans and a horse. And when they left, the horse stayed behind. Since then a small army of animal lovers have been regularly feeding the horse, and animal charities have been bombarded with complaints and demands on them to remove the horse and take it to a sanctuary.

The horse has been out in all weathers for the past 17 days. It´s about time the UK government made trespass­ ing on land by travellers ille­ gal, punishable by the con­ fiscation of all their property.

It would only have to happen once and it would put an end to the problem.

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Friday, September 5, 2014

SAY IT IN SPANISH Learn the lingo - with a little help from JEANETTE ERATH Spanish 138 Hi and welcome back to learning Spanish with me, Jeanette, I hope you are all improving and managing to put phrases together with some fluency, whatever your level you will find lessons to help you if you look back at my column online, I have been writing this column every week for nearly three years now as you can tell by the number of the lessons so if you can´t find the part you wish to cover then drop me a line and I´ll do it again, it can be difficult finding the exact part you want in over one hundred lessons, and the part you are finding hard might be the same part that someone else is struggling with. I am always available to contact via The Courier or my school e­mail onevoicespain@gmail.com.

This week we are going to look at a very hard working verb, one that we know means one thing but that is also used in a variety of other sayings that we need to learn and become familiar with, tenemos que acostumbrarnos con estas frases.

when you hear the verb you need to know they are not using it as ´to give´ but rather in a different context.

Let´s remind ourselves of the conjugation of dar in the present simple tense, it is an irregular verb in the first person singular: yo doy, tú das, él/ella/usted da, nosotros damos, vosotros dais, ellos/ellas/ustedes dan. There are of

Vamos a dar un paseo

The verb we are looking at today is just three little letters in its infinitive but it is a much bigger verb than it appears. The verb is dar which you know means – to give. However I am going to give you a list of other occasions it is used and so

course other tenses which I hope you will think about as you go through this list of examples.

Firstly we are going to start with: dar a alguien las gracias por algo – which means ´give thanks to someone for some­ thing´ e.g: ¿Le diste las gracias? – did you thank him?

Dar a alguien la bienvenida – I hope you know bien­ venido means welcome, so this translates as ´to welcome someone´ No me da la gana is a good one to use when the situation arises as it means ´I don’t want to´ or ´I don´t feel like it´ Dar un paseo means to go for a walk (¿quieres dar un paseo? – do you want to go for a walk) and dar una vuelta en coche means ´go for a drive´, if you just say Dar

una vuelta it could mean ´go for a spin´.

Dar asco is a strong saying when we think about the trans­ lation in English but it´s a very common one in Spanish, it means literally ´to sicken or revolt´ Me da asco means ´it sickens me´ but then in context it doesn´t always seem so bad: Le dan asco las cebollas translates as ´he can´t stand onions´ One of the sayings that seems a bit strange is dar clases because it can means give classes as a teacher but also have classes as a student. For example if someone says “doy clases de ingles” it is not clear if they are the teacher or student, therefore when I speak to Spanish people I have to say “Soy profesora, doy clases de ingles y español” and those of you who go to Spanish classes can say “doy clases de español” Most of you hopefully know the next one which is dar de comer a which means ´to feed´ había que darle de comer al pajaro con la mano – the bird had to be fed by hand.

The following are a bit more obvious because they use the verb as ´to give´: Dar un consejo a alguien – to give someone advice, dar ánimo(s) a alguien ­ to give encouragement to someone, to urge someone on, en un momento dado – at a given moment/time, dado que – given that / since.

Another popular saying is Darse cuenta de algo which means ´to realise something´ e.g. no me di cuenta – I didn’t realise.

Dar un examen means ´to take an exam´ That is it for this week, next week we will be learning some more uses of dar.

Como siempre que tengas una buena semana ¡hasta la próxima!

Friday, September 5, 2014

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Friday, September 5, 2014

THE MANY BENEFITS OF GREEN TEA EXTRACT One of the great advance­ ments in nutrition in the twenty­first century is the scientific confirmation of the many benefits of green tea extract. Here are just a few.

Green tea: • Lowers cholesterol • Slows arthritis • Prevents the growth of cancer cells • Assists weight loss What accounts for the health benefits of green tea extract? Over 1,800 scientif­ ic studies have found that the active constituents in green tea are powerful antioxidants. These are called polyphenols (cate­ chins) and flavonols.

Epigallocatechin gallate (you can just call it EGCG) is the most powerful of these antioxidants. Milligram for milligram, EGCG has 25 to

100 times the antioxidant power of vitamins C and E. A cup of green tea has more antioxidants than a serving of broccoli, spinach, carrots or strawberries.

These abundant antioxi­ dants power the benefits of green tea extract. They keep DNA intact and they sta­ bilise the membranes of cells. These effects of green tea make it a powerful sup­ port in many health condi­ tions. Let's look at the bene­ fits of green tea supple­ ments in more detail.

Green tea has been shown to lower “bad” LDL cholesterol and serum triglyceride levels.

Who would have imag­ ined that simple green tea could be as potent as Lipitor or Zocor or Crestin with none of their side effects?

Scientific studies show that middle­aged men and women in Japan who drink 2 or more cups of green tea a day almost always have nor­ mal cholesterol. Scientists have also recently reported that if you drink green tea after you eat a fatty food, less cholesterol will go into you bloodstream.

And if you have high cho­ lesterol when you begin tak­ ing green tea supplements, your body will convert less of it into a form that clogs your arteries.

Green tea protects your joints against osteoarthritis.

This is one of the least known but most beneficial effects of green tea extract.

Green tea prevents inflam­ mation. When there is less inflammation, there is less wear and tear on your joints.

Green tea prevents the growth of cancer cells.

The EGCG in green tea prevents cancer cells from growing by binding to a spe­ cific enzyme. This health benefit of green tea is espe­ cially important in cancers of the prostate, breast, and lung.

Researchers studied two groups of men with a pre­ cancerous condition of the prostate. One consumed the equivalent of 12 to 15 cups of green tea a day. One did not. One year later, 30% of the men who did not con­ sume green tea supple­ ments developed prostate cancer. Only 3% of the men who took green tea supple­ ments developed cancer.

Another of the benefits of green tea extract is support for women who have breast cancer. Green tea provides chemicals that bind oestro­ gen. This hormone is then not free to stimulate breast cancer cells.

Women who consume the greatest amount of green tea before menopause have the least severe forms of breast cancer when the dis­ ease occurs. Women who drink green tea are less like­ ly to have recurrences of breast cancer after treat­ ment. And most important of

all, women who consume green tea are 50% less like­ ly to develop breast cancer at all.

Another of the benefits of green tea extract is protec­ tion against lung cancer.

The Japanese have both the highest rate of smoking and the lowest rate of lung can­ cer in the developed world.

Japanese smokers who consume a lot of green tea seem to be protected against lung cancer.

And green tea can even help you lose weight. In a clinical trial, men eating a high­fat diet were given enough green tea to pro­ vide the caffeine in a single cup of coffee. Although this

amount of caffeine has no effect on weight loss, when the caffeine comes from green tea, it is highly signif­ icant.

The green tea supple­ ment boosted the number of calories burned by 4.5%.

While this is just 135 calo­ ries a day, the study showed that taking green supplements could help the average man on a high­fat diet lose 18 lbs (8 kg) in a year's time. It could help the average woman on a high­fat diet lose 11 pounds (5 kg). This is without eat­ ing less or exercising more.

How Can I Take Green Tea? Two capsules of green tea extract a day can pro­ vide all the benefits of 20 cups of green tea­all you need to support even diffi­ cult health conditions.

Green tea is safe and effective. Take 1 to 3 cap­ sules of green tea extract every day. It is better to take green tea supple­ ments in the morning or afternoon rather than at night. In the unlikely event of stomach upset, take with food.

Friday, September 5, 2014

WHY YOU NEED VITAMIN D DR MACHI MANNU’S ADVICE CLINIC Email your questions and comments to contact@medb.es

Every summer thousands of people flock to the coastal regions of Spain in search of a sunny holiday, more so for people living further away from the equator, where it is much colder.

In recent years, the recommended dietary allowance of Vitamin D has been increased as nutritional research better understand its full effects on the body. Over thousands of years of human history, the shift from hunter gatherer to industrialisation has also meant less vitamin D from sun exposure. This is very important because the best source of Vitamin D is skin exposure to ultraviolet­ B (UVB) rays of sunlight. Fish oil and fatty fish such as salmon and tuna are also rich in vitamin D, making them an important source in

temperate regions. UVB is the primary cause of sun burns due to over exposure to sunlight; however it also produces vitamin D in your skin. The amount produced depends on several factors such as exposure time, time of day, geographical loca­ tion, pollution, age, the amount of skin surface exposed, and skin colour.

As we age, we become less able to turn sunlight into Vitamin D, so seniors are particularly at risk.

For many years it was believed that the only vital role Vitamin D played was in promoting the strength of bones and teeth, but current research shows that vitamin D does far more. Because of its role in the immune sys­ tem and inflammatory bodily processes, lower levels of

vitamin D has been implicat­ ed in arthritis, allergies, asth­ ma, psoriasis, crohn´s dis­ ease, and congenital heart disease. Vitamin D has also been shown to improve blood sugar levels in diabet­ ics, slow or reverse certain types of cancer such as breast and ovarian cancer, as well as prevent the symp­ toms of multiple sclerosis.

Even though the recom­ mended daily dose of Vitamin D is 4000IU, research has shown that a 20­30 minute exposure to the mid­day sun is compara­ ble to 10,000­25,000IU. This makes the sun surely the best source of Vitamin D. FOR A FULL BODY SCAN CALL DR MACHI MANNU: 965 071 745

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Friday, September 5, 2014

PICKING THAT RIGHT SUPPLEMENT Q

I do not take any supplements, but would like to start taking something. The problem I find is that there are so many different types available, and they are all sup­ posed to be beneficial. In your opinion if I had to take just one, which should it be?

You are absolutely right when you say there are so many different kinds of supplement available, all claiming to be beneficial to health. In a way this is true. Our body needs a variety of nutrients to function optimally, and in days gone by, we would have been able to source most of these nutrients from our diet. Sadly the soils in which crops are grown have been depleted of nutrients, making the fruits and vegetables that come from such soils also low in nutrients. For this rea­ son, supplements have become very essential. I have been asked this question a number of times, and have had difficul­ ties giving an answer in the past, but that was before I came across the supplement known as laminine. For a while now, I have been using and prescribing laminine for a number of health problems, and I am very impressed with the amazing results I have noticed in my health, as well as the health of my patients. What makes Laminine different from other supple­ ments? Well Laminine contains proteins that encourage stem cells found in the body to turn into new tissue in order to replace injured ones. Stem cells are undifferentiated cells that are yet to transform into tissues such as heart, bones and liver. In other words stem cells have the capacity to become new organs. This is why stem cell therapy is seen as the future of medical therapies. Laminine is the closest thing to stem cell therapy. What gives Laminine its unique properties is an ingredient known as Fibroblast Growth Factor (FGF).

Laminine is produced from 9 day old fertilized chicken eggs and then freeze­dried to preserve its delicate contents. Since the 1930s, it has been known that chicken egg contains many vital compounds that promote healing, and that these com­ pounds are of the highest concentration on the 9th day in a fertilized egg. These healing compounds include essential amino acids, polypeptides, neuropeptides, vitamins, minerals

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and fibroblast Growth Factor (FGF). Fibroblasts are a type of stem cells found mainly in the bones, joints, nerves, heart and other organs. These fibroblasts are stimulated by Laminine to transform into brand new tissue. Amino acids are regarded as the building blocks of life, and are required to form DNA, as well as muscle and nerve tissue. Current Research is now pointing to neuropeptides as being responsible for the trans­ mission of signals from one nerve to another. The benefits of Laminine are numerous, however what stands out is its ability to help repair and regenerate damaged tissue. Our bodies are in a continuous state of breakdown and repair, with more breakdowns than repairs occurring as we age. Laminine pro­ motes repair, and helps the body heal a lot faster. Due to the neuropeptides it contains, laminine also has a positive effect on the nervous system, and speeds up the healing of nerve and brain injuries. Laminine promotes deep and restful sleep.

And by promoting healthy sleep, laminine further encourages the body to heal because healing takes place during sleep.

Laminine also promotes relaxation. This is because laminine contains all 22 essential amino acids, the building blocks of thousands of chemicals needed for the body to perform opti­ mally. One of such chemicals is serotonin – the feel good hor­ mone needed for relaxation. People taking laminine report that they feel better in themselves, their mood improves and they also feel more relaxed. Laminine also helps women suf­ fering from hot flushes by supporting the hormonal system.

Since it contains all essential amino acids, the body is able to produce the exact amount of hormones it requires. Another impressive effect of laminine is how it relieves bone and joint disorders such as osteoarthritis, rheumatoid arthritis, muscle pain etc. With such benefits, laminine is certainly the supple­ ment you need if you had to take just one kind. Laminine is not available in the pharmacy, but you can order it from MedB Health Shop. It is sold for 36 Euros for a container of 30 cap­ sules, or 100 Euros for 3 containers. The recommended dose is 3 capsules daily for the first month, and 1 capsule daily sub­ sequently. However those with more chronic disorders should

take 3 caps daily for a longer time period – 3 to 4 months. To order Call 965071745 What other drugs can I use other than statins to lower my cholesterol levels?

There are 4 powerful natural products for lowering cho­ lesterol, and either one or a combination of 2 of these will lower and most importantly regulate cholesterol more than the dangerous statin drugs. These 4 natural products are niacin, policosanol, pantethine and garlic. Niacin is another name for Vitamin B3, and is the most powerful natural anti­cholesterol agents known. It increases the levels of HDL (good choles­ terol) by up to 32% while lowering triglycerides and bad cho­ lesterol by 23 and 26% respectively. The effective therapeutic dose is between 1500 and 3000 mg daily. A side effect of niacin is that it causes skin flushing, and to avoid this, a mod­ ified naturally form known as niacinate is preferable.

Policosanol is a waxy substance derived from cane sugar, and it too has been found to be as effective as niacin in regu­ lating cholesterol levels. It also has the added advantage of normalizing blood sugar levels. Pantethine or Vitamin B5 is another excellent cholesterol buster especially for diabetics who should choose it against niacin which may adversely affect blood sugar levels. It also normalises blood viscosity, preventing the platelets (blood clotting cells) from clumping together. Last but not least is the humble garlic which is very effective for cholesterol control because of its active ingredi­ ent alliin. The effective dose is about 4grammes of fresh chopped garlic or between 1­4 cloves daily. It must be chopped or crushed to release the active ingredient. At our clinic MedB, our preferred choice is Policosanol, because we have documented its beneficial effects on high cholesterol. It increases HDL (good cholesterol) and reduces LDL (bad cho­ lesterol). Policosanol from Douglas Laboratories is available at MedB health shop; 60 capsules – 25.22 Euros. Call 965071745, delivery is free.

EMAIL YOUR QUESTIONS TO : contact@medb.es

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Edition 12

POSITIVE SIGNS FOR THE PROPERTY MARKET

Things are on the up for the Spanish property market, with sales figures in tourist spots like the Costa Blanca being particularly positive.

The latest figures have revealed that the Spanish property market is on an upward curve once again, with foreign investors continuing to show an interest and providing a much­needed boost to the sector.

Sales figures for resale property in the Costa Blanca came top out of all of the country’s designat­ ed tourist resorts. In Alicante Province a total of 2,501 sales were made to foreign buyers. This is almost double the number of sales that were made by its closest competitor, Málaga, where 1,111 properties were sold to foreigners.

During the first nine months of last year, 225,297 property transactions were made in Spain, resulting in a drop of 6.8% during the same period the previous year.

However, in spite of the global deficit, when broken down into regions, figures relating to the sale of coastal apart­ ments in Valencia actually rose by 8%, with the bulk of these being completed in Torrevieja and Orihuela Costa.

Statistics released by the Ministry of Development and the Asociación de Promotores y Constructores de Torrevieja y

Comarca (Procosta) at the start of this year, highlight a total of 2,824 contracts being exchanged for resale proper­

ties, of which 1,705 were in Torrevieja and 1,119 in Orihuela Costa.

Meanwhile, figures relating to the sale of new properties tell a very different story, with Torrevieja attracting only 58 new build buyers in the second quarter of 2012, and anoth­ er 118 in the third. This was well behind Orihuela and Costas, where 133 new homes were snapped up in the

second quarter, rising to 299 in the third, but still far short of the resale market.

This is of course only a fraction of the sales fig­ ures recorded prior to the economic crisis, when literally thousands of properties were being sold every month. However, it is certainly a step in the right direction. Procosta suggests that it is the beautiful beaches and amenable climate which keeps attracting buyers to the Costa Blanca, especially those from colder parts of Europe. The largest foreign investment markets are currently Scandinavia and Russia, with as many as 14,300 Russian people now registered as living in the Province. During the first half of 2012, 849 prop­ erties had been sold to Russian investors, repre­ senting 20% of the total investment by foreigners for the Valencian Community. They are also the group that is tending to go for the larger, more expensive properties, with the average spend pegged at around 202,000 euros.

This could be partly due to the Spanish Government’s pledge to grant temporary residency to Russian investors who buy Spanish homes with a value in excess of 160,000 euros.

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Friday, September 5, 2014

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Wise Property Investors Choose The Costa Blanca

Although the Spanish Property Industry has suffered some difficult periods in recent years, all indicators show that things are now on the up Whilst the world’s media is still intent on publishing doom and gloom articles relat­ ing to the global economic crisis, official statistics have proven that there IS move­ ment, particularly in the property market.

Slight Improvements were recorded dur­ ing 2011, with the upward trend continuing throughout 2012. According to figures compiled by the National Statistics Institute (INE), the sale of property across the country rose by 0.9% in September 2012, compared to the figure for the same month of 2011, equating to a total of 25 985 transactions. Of these 50.9% were resale properties and 49.1% new develop­ ments. This was regarded as very positive news by optimists, who considered it a clear indication that the economy was recovering; particularly as it showed the second consecutive increase, with figures for August also registering improvements of 3% after a stagnant run of 17 months.

What is even more reassuring for those of us living on the Costa Blanca, is that the highest number of house sales per 100 000 population were executed in La Rioja (128) and right here in the Valencian Community (103). Valencia continued to attract large numbers of buyers through to the close of 2012, with 3 912 properties

being sold during the month of November.

Costa Blanca Real Estate Agents have confirmed that this is indeed the case, and are pleased to report an increase in sales at both ends of the property scale, from small apartments to luxurious detached villas. And with the increased demand, particularly among the resale’s sector, Agents have even began to advertise for new property listings to satisfy demand.

The major property investment markets now mainly lie with the Scandinavians and Russians, although British investors hop­ ing to take advantage of the soaring value of the pound do still favour the Costa Blanca. As a whole, property prices are far lower than they were five years ago, although they have only dropped margin­ ally since 2011, suggesting that they are currently beginning to stabilize. This makes NOW the perfect time to buy, as prices are more attractive than ever, with local real­estate agents promoting two­ bedroom properties for as little as €40,000. In light of recent trends, it is also makes sense that from here prices are more likely to go up then down.

At Property Plus, we are making it easy for you to take advantage of these positive movements, by bringing you all of the best deals in one handy supplement. So why not make 2013 the year to put the ball in motion and make your Spanish dream a reality!

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Friday, September 5, 2014

Friday, September 5, 2014

SPANISH NEWS

RAGE FROM THE GRAVE

A Spanish musician who died angry at the govern­ ment’s tax policies sent a protest message from the grave directed at Cristobal Montoro, the country’s finance minister.

“Montoro, you b­­­­­­d, now come and get your money,” were the words chosen by Jose Maria Bejarano Martin to mark his grave in the village of San Pedro de Latarce, in the Castille y Leon region of northern Spain.

Before his death at the age of 66 last November, Mr Bejarano ­ known as “Chema” to his friends ­ gave clear instructions as to the message he wanted over his final resting place.

“When I die, I want you to put these words over my grave,” he told his wife and six chil­ dren.

Mr Bejerano, a musician turned promoter, was spurred to take an “eternal dig” at Mr Montoro in protest at the decision by Spain’s conservative Popular Party government to raise IVA on cultural performances to 21 per cent. A longtime supporter of the PP, Mr Bejerano had become disillusioned with the party over their austerity measures.

“He felt let down when they introduced public spending cuts and tax hikes that

IT’S A STICK UP TO GET UNSTUCK

Residents in Toledo are up in arms after their local fire­ fighters charged a mother 90 euros for freeing her two­year­ old son from some metal bars he had his head stuck in. The invoice handed out to the disgruntled parent reads “rescue of child at Salto del Caballo football field”.

The bill was posted on a Facebook page called “You’re not from Toledo if…” alongside a photo of the trapped young child. According to the ABC newspaper, the closed Facebook group has been a hotbed of commentary among Toledo locals who deem it just or unfair that firemen could charge for what is usually a public service.

“I’m a fireman in Madrid but live in Toledo and I can’t believe what I’m reading,” wrote one person.

“It’s our job, we get called up for all kinds of tasks in Madrid and we never charge anyone. It’s not the firemen’s fault though, it’s the Town Hall’s eagerness to fill their coffers.”

Toledo authorities have responded by arguing that a bylaw was passed in 2013 and that neighbourhood associations directly harmed his business ­ like raising were given the chance to greenlight the measures.

IVA on cultural events to 21 per cent,” his “This is so the people of Toledo don’t have to pay for the son, Eduardo, told El Norte de Castilla news­ negligence, lack of home maintenance, slip­ups and forget­ paper. fulness of certain individuals,” government spokesperson With outstanding debts for failing to pay Rafael Perezagua said at the time. his taxes and social security payments, the musician was declared insolvent. A photo­ graph of the epitaph has gone viral on Spanish social networking sites after being posted on Twitter last week. The local mayor Three teenagers on holi­ footprint', police were able said the epitaph had sparked a “mini revolu­ day in rural western Spain to identify two teenage girls tion” in the town of 533 residents. caused major damage to a spending their summer holi­ “Personally, it is not how I would chose to hillside chapel during a days in San Martín de make a protest, but each person is free to satanic ceremony. Graffiti Trevejo who were also express themselves in their own way in a described as 'sacrilegious', involved. democracy,” said Mercedes Josefa de crosses and Biblical They all owned up to Castro, mayor of San Pedro de Latarce. “It imagery smashed and van­ shows that he never lost his sense of dalism affecting the village humour, even in difficult times.” swimming pool close to the

CHILDREN OF THE DAMNED

WEEKEND MAYHEM

A Madrid man stabbed his girl­ friend's mother to death and seri­ ously injured his partner while on a four­day prison leave period last Saturday.

The 32­year­old Romanian aggressor, in jail for car­ rying out a violent robbery and belonging to an organized crime group, fatally stabbed his 57­year­ old victim in the neck with a carving tool.

The woman was trying to protect her daughter from the aggressor, who survived despite receiving 25 stabs in the chest and arms herself, after pulling through after an operation. When police

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arrived at the victims’ address in the Madrid municipality of Arganda del Rey, the attacker was still there and he was taken into cus­ tody.

hermitage, and to the ceme­ tery where the temple is based, were discovered.

The mayor of San Martín de Trevejo (Cáceres province, in the Extremadura region) con­ tacted the Guardia Civil, who took fingerprints, trawled through Facebook and Twitter, and called in handwriting experts to examine the graffiti. A teenage boy living in Cáceres whose family has a second home in the village was traced via social net­ works and found to be one of the authors of the dam­ age. Through his 'cyber

causing wilful and malicious damage when questioned by a youth court judge. The youngsters revealed their vandalism crusade had been part of a devil­worship ritual.

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Friday, September 5, 2014

FRESH BAKED BREAD OLIVE OIL BREAD Ingredients

7g sachet easy­blend yeast or 15g fresh yeast 500g strong white bread flour, plus extra for dusting 2 tsp salt 1 tsp sugar 2 tbsp olive oil

Method

1. Tip the flour into a mixing bowl. For easy­blend dried yeast, stir this into the flour. For fresh yeast, crumble it and rub into the flour as you would with butter when making pas­ try. Add the salt and sugar.

2. Boil the kettle and measure 100ml into a jug. Top up with cold water to the 300ml mark. Test the temperature with your finger – it should feel perfectly hand­hot. Add the oil.

3. Make a well in the centre of the dry ingredients and pour in the liquid all at once. Mix quickly using your hands or a wooden fork to make a soft and slightly sticky dough. Wipe the dough around the bowl to pick up any loose flour.

4. Sprinkle the work surface with flour and tip out the dough.

Knead by stretching it away from you, then folding it in half towards you and pushing it away with the heel of your hand.

Give it a quarter turn and repeat, developing a rhythm.

5. When the dough is smooth, put it back into the mixing bowl, cover with a tea towel and leave to rest for 1 hr (no need to find a warm place). The dough is ready when it springs back when you press it with your finger. (At this stage, you can add other flavourings ­ see 'Goes well with', right).

6. Tip dough onto a floured surface, knead to remove air bubbles. Shape into a round, place on an oiled baking sheet and slash top with sharp knife. Cover and rise for 30 mins.

Heat oven to 240C/220C fan/gas 8. Bake for 30­35 mins until browned and crisp.

FRUIT & SPICE SODA BREAD Ingredients 100g rolled porridge oats 25g butter, diced 200g plain flour 200g plain wholemeal flour, plus extra for dusting 100g caster sugar 1 tsp bicarbonate of soda 1½ tsp mixed spice 50g raisins 50g sultanas 50g stoned dates, finely chopped 3 tbsp mixed peel 450ml buttermilk 3­4 tbsp demerara sugar

Method

1. Heat oven to 200C/180C fan/gas 6. Whizz the porridge oats and butter together in a food processor, or rub the but­ ter into the oats with your fingertips in a big bowl. Stir in the flours, caster sugar, bicarb, mixed spice, 1 tsp salt, the

raisins, sultanas, dates and mixed peel.

2. Pour over the buttermilk and quickly stir in with a round­ bladed knife. Tip out onto a flour­dusted surface and gently bring together into a ball with your hands. Transfer to a flour­ dusted baking sheet and scatter over the demerara sugar, pressing it into the top. Use a sharp, flour­dusted knife to cut a big cross in the top and bake for 30­35 mins until crusty on the outside. Eat warm or cold, thickly sliced, with butter.

SUNDRIED TOMATO SODA BREAD BAPS Ingredients 250g plain white flour, plus extra for dusting 250g seed & grain bread flour 100g porridge oats 1 tsp bicarbonate of soda 1 tsp dried thyme 25g butter 85g sundried tomatoes (from a jar), roughly chopped 475ml buttermilk

Method

1. Heat oven to 200C/180C fan/gas 6 and dust a baking tray with flour. Mix the flours, oats, bicarbonate of soda, 1 tsp salt and thyme in a bowl, then rub in the butter.

2. Add the tomatoes, pour in the buttermilk and mix quickly with the blade of a knife to make a wet dough. Tip onto a floured work surface, then cut evenly into 6 and, with floured hands, shape to make rounds. Handle the dough as little as possible – not just because it is sticky, but to make sure the texture stays light. Arrange, spaced apart, on the baking tray and mark a cross in the tops with a floured knife.

3. Bake for 20­25 mins until the bases of the baps are pale golden and sound hollow when tapped. Cover with a tea towel and leave to cool. To freeze, pack the cooled baps into a rigid container. Thaw at room temperature for 3 hrs.

MELTING CHEESE WITH POPPY & APRICOT BREAD WREATH Ingredients 500g pack white bread mix 100g walnut pieces 140g dried apricots, sliced 25g poppy seeds, toasted 400ml milk a little oil, for greasing 1 egg, beaten 1­2 soft cheeses in boxes, like brie or Camembert splash white wine

Method

1. Tip the bread mix into a food processor, add the walnuts

and whizz until fully incor­ porated. Transfer to a bowl and stir in the apri­ cots and most of the poppy seeds. Warm the milk to hand temperature, then stir into the flour mix with a wooden spoon.

Knead in the bowl until smooth. Cover with oiled cling film and leave some­ where warm­ish to rise for 1 hr.

2. Find a heatproof dish the same size or a bit bigger than your cheese box. Sit it in the middle of a big baking tray.

Shape the risen dough into a long, thin log that will wrap around the dish on the sheet, like a wreath. Press the ends together, loosely cover with oiled cling film and leave to rise for 20­30 mins.

3. Heat oven to 180C/160C fan/gas 4. Brush the egg all over the loaf, then sprinkle with the remaining poppy seeds.

Using kitchen scissors, randomly snip into the dough, to give a spiky finish. Bake for 35­40 mins until golden and crusty, and the bottom sounds hollow when you tap it. Remove the dish from the middle.

4. To serve, unwrap the cheese and put it back into the box.

Stab a few times, add the wine and tie kitchen string around the box to secure it in case the glue comes undone. Sit the cheese in the middle of the bread, without its lid, and bake for 10­15 mins until molten. Serve straight away and, if you like, pop another cheese in the oven so you can finish off the bread when the first cheese box is wiped clean.

GARLIC BREAD PIZZAS Ingredients For the base 500g strong white flour, plus extra for rolling 7g sachet fast­action yeast 1 tsp salt 2 tbsp olive oil For the topping 50g butter, softened 2 garlic cloves, crushed 300g pack mozzarella, drained 4 tomatoes, roughly chopped handful basil leaves, roughly chopped 1 tbsp extra­ virgin olive oil 1 tsp balsamic vinegar

Method

1. Tip all of the base ingredi­ ents into a mix­ ing bowl. Pour

Friday, September 5, 2014 over 300ml warm water – not too hot. Stir quite hard with a spoon until the mixture comes together.

2. Turn out onto a lightly floured surface and knead 2­3 times until the mixture forms a ball. Divide dough into 8 equalsize pieces.

Take 1 piece, leaving the remainder loosely covered with oiled cling film. Lightly flour the surface again and use a rolling pin to roll out dough into a round about 15cm diameter or as thin as you can. 3. Put pizza on a baking sheet.

Mix together the butter and crushed garlic, then spread a little over the pizza. Tear the mozzarella into thin strips and scatter over.

Repeat for the remaining pieces of dough.

You should be able to fit 2 pizzas per baking sheet; depending on how many baking sheets you have, you may have to cook in batches.

4. Heat oven to 240C/fan 220C/gas 9. Bake pizzas for 12­15 mins until crisp and cooked through. Meanwhile, mix together the remaining ingredients, then season well.

When the pizza comes out of the oven, top with the tomato mixture and serve straight away.

ARTICHOKE FOCACCIA Ingredients For the dough 500g strong flour 7g sachet fast­action yeast 1 heaped tsp salt For the filling large bunch rosemary 285g jar artichokes antipasti in oil (we used Sacla) 50g freshly grated parmesan (or vegetarian alternative), plus extra for grating

Method

1. Tip the flour into a large bowl and make a well in the centre. Add the yeast and salt, then gradually pour in 350ml tepid water, stirring as you go. Bring the dough together with a spoon, then with your hands. It should be soft, but not too sticky or wet. If it won’t come together, pour in a little extra water; if the dough is too wet, add extra flour. Tip onto a floured work surface and knead for about 10 mins, or until it’s smooth, soft and springs back when pushed with a finger. Leave to rise in an oiled bowl covered with cling film in a warm place for 1 hr or Packed with sum­ mer flavours until the dough has doubled in size.

2. Strip leaves from half the rosemary and finely chop. Break the rest into smaller pieces. Drain the artichokes, reserving the oil, and chop into chunks.

3. When risen, tip the dough onto an oiled work surface and roll out into a 35 x 45cm rectangle. Slip an oiled baking sheet under half of the dough. Top the half with arti­ chokes, all the Parmesan and rosemary.

4. Grind over black pepper and drizzle with a little of the reserved oil. Fold over the other dough half, pressing the edges together and under to seal. Leave to rise in a warm place, covered with the oiled cling film, for 30 mins.

Heat oven to 240C/fan 220C/gas 9.

CLASSIC WHITE LOAF Ingredients 500g strong white flour, plus extra for dust­ ing 7g sachet fast­action dried yeast 1 tsp salt up to 350ml lukewarm water a little sunflower oil, for greasing

Method

1. Make the dough by tipping the flour, yeast and salt into a large bowl and making a well in the middle. Pour in most of the water and use your fingers or a wooden spoon to mix the flour and water together until combined to a slightly wet, pillowy, workable dough ­ add a splash more water if necessary. Tip the dough onto a lightly floured surface and knead for at least 10 mins until smooth and elastic. This can also be done in a tabletop mixer with a dough hook. Place the dough in a clean oiled bowl, cover with cling film and leave to rise until doubled in size.

2. Heat oven to 220C/fan 200C/gas 7. Knock back the dough by tipping it back onto a floured surface and pushing the air out.

Mould the dough into a rugby ball shape that will fit a 900g loaf tin and place in the tin.

3. Cover with a clean tea towel and leave to prove for 30 mins. Dust the top of the loaf with a little more flour and slash the top with a sharp knife if you want. Bake the bread for 15 mins, then reduce the heat to 190C/fan 170C/gas 5 and continue to bake for 30 mins until the loaf sounds hollow when removed from the tin and tapped on the base. Leave the bread on a wire rack to cool com­ pletely.

4.

The loaf will stay fresh in an airtight container for 3 days or can be frozen for 1 month.

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Friday, September 5, 2014

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Friday, September 5, 2014

Services

Property

Lifestyle

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Friday, September 5, 2014

Horoscopes Aries March 21 ­ April 19 It isn't exactly all lightness and harmony at home today, Aries. There's tension in the air and it manifests in silly family argu­ ments. Try to arrange separate activities for siblings, and encourage your partner to eat out with friends. This is a day to give everyone his or her space. Tomorrow everyone will be happy to eat together again.

Taurus April 20 ­ May 20 This could be a particularly stressful day, Taurus. Your workload is heavier than ever, thanks to the increased responsibil­ ity you've taken on. The day seems end­ less, yet there aren't enough hours to get done all that needs doing. Take care not to take your anxiety out on others. If you're nice to them, they may even help you finish your project!

Gemini May 21 ­ June 20 Your self­confidence may be a bit low and you could doubt your abilities right now, Gemini. Don't get depressed or disheart­ ened. Your skills are excellent. Try to look at your situation objectively and pinpoint why you aren't progressing in your career as rapidly as you'd hoped. You may be worried about money, but know that every­ thing will work out in the end.

Cancer June 21 ­ July 22 Today you may feel bored and frustrated with your life's direction, Cancer. You feel buried under responsibilities, with no time left to do what you really want to do. You have other interests to pursue but no time to pursue them. It's frustrating. You might want to rethink your priorities. If you're creative about time management, you'll be able to find some time.

By Pandora Leo July 23 ­ August 22 You're less optimistic and energetic than usual, Leo. Your mind feels sluggish ­ your whole body does, in fact. You're either coming down with the flu or com­ pletely and thoroughly disheartened. This would be a good day to take some time off. Issues from the past may come back to haunt you. Perhaps you should address them once and for all.

Virgo August 23 ­ September 22 You may be discouraged about money matters today, Virgo. Perhaps a raise you'd been hoping for didn't come through. Perhaps a professional project didn't work out as you expected. Now is the time to put your ingenuity to work and figure out a way to earn the money you need. Trust that you have the necessary know­how. A good opportunity awaits you.

Libra September 23 ­ October 22 If work is beginning to feel more like a burden than a joy, it may be time to rethink your job, Libra. Your personality is such that you need lots of room to stretch and grow. If you feel stifled, you know it's time to find a new professional challenge.

You're fortunate that your skill set affords you many opportunities. Choose careful­ ly!

Scorpio October 23 ­ November 21 You're especially in tune with the environ­ ment and the people around you today, Scorpio. Such sensitivity is new to you, and you aren't exactly sure what to do with the myriad messages that come into your head, seemingly out of nowhere. Even though this is outside your usual experi­ ence, try to accept rather than analyze.

Sagittarius November 22 ­ December 21 You're drawn to public service, Sagittarius.

This desire propels you to volunteer your services with a group of some kind. You may feel a bit awkward at first, but your natural leadership abilities will soon kick in. The group will be left wondering how they ever managed without you. Your tal­ ent shines through once again. Well done!

Capricorn December 22 ­ January 19 Don't take everything at face value today, Capricorn. Information you receive might not be accurate. Someone could be repeating gossip or even creating it just to have something to talk about. Don't take part in the discussion. Since your workload is likely heavy, forego the socializing in favor of finishing the tasks in front of you.

Aquarius January 20 ­ February 18 You may be feeling a bit on edge today, Aquarius. Your self­confidence is shaky and you may feel in need of new chal­ lenges. The tedious tasks you have in front of you don't inspire your imagination or creativity. Do what you can to get through this difficult day. Be extra kind to yourself by indulging in a good lunch or listening to classical music.

Pisces February 19 ­ March 20 You and your mate may be experiencing some differences of opinion. It seems you each have definite ideas about some of life's fundamental values and they aren't completely in sync. Make an extra effort to communicate, Pisces. You may find that your values aren't as far apart as they first seemed. This rift between you will soon close. Hang in there.

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Friday, September 5, 2014

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services com­ pany on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain eight years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC prob­ lems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast expe­ rience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: John wanted help in figuring out what his com- ADVICE: Tony wanted to stop OpenOffice from starting automatically puter was doing behind his back.

Hi Richard, we are get­

Hi Richard. I have Windows 8 on my laptop with the latest updates. I have my laptop on everyday all day but I'm not using it all the time.

Recently I've been noticing that the hard drive is being accessed every couple min­ utes or so and I have no idea what could be running in the background to cause this but I realise this probably isn't good. What can I do to stop this so that my hard drive isn't getting worn out un­necessarily so, should I hiber­ nate it? For some reason I never liked doing this as I thought it caused issues. Perhaps you can give me some ideas and explana­ tions as to what to do, thanks.

Q

Hi John, your computer is always doing a number of things even when you have it turned on and are not using it, depending on what you have installed it may be checking for antivirus updates, checking that its hard drive is in order, downloading information used by the gadgets on the desktop, updating its error log and possibly a whole host of other things. The one thing you can be sure of is that it is not going to wear out your hard drive. As long as the performance of your computer hasn’t changed then you shouldn’t worry about it, if however, you find that your computer is slowing down (particularly when you are using it) then the reason for the hard drive access could be that it is using the hard drive as virtual memory and we should investigate adding some additional RAM to stop that from happening.

A

Mark wanted to know what to do when downloading files from the Internet

Q A

Hi Richard, What should I do: run or save or open when I’m downloading?

Hi Mark, it very much depends on what you are downloading. If for example you are downloading a picture sent to you by a fam­ ily member then you might well want to “save” the download so that you can look at it again on your computer without downloading it again.

However if you are downloading a program that you intend to install, like AVG antivirus, then you might choose to “run” as you will probably not need to download the same file again.

Don’t forget you can follow me on twit­ ter @bluemoonspain Alternately why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:­ www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

Q

ting a niggly problem in that the OpenOffice win­ dow opens when the computer is switched on, is there any way to stop this from happen­ ing?

Hi Tony, OpenOffice is set to automatically launch on start­up, how­ ever if you want to dis­ able this functionality just do the following…

A

1. Open any of the Open Office applications, such as Writer.

2. Click the "Tools", then "Options" 3. Expand the "OpenOffice.org" drop­down section, then click “Memory" 4. Untick "Load OpenOffice.org During System Start­up" from the "OpenOffice.org Quickstarter" field.

5. Click "OK" to save the new Open Office start­up settings.

READERS TIP: Adrian had a tip for new laptop owners with built in webcams TIP: Richard, You may find this an interesting comment to pass on. I use Skype Video to com­ municate with my sister.

Last week she pur­ chased a new laptop. On making contact I found that her picture was very poor and out of focus. I asked her to check that all the tape had been removed from over the microphone and camera.

The tape was still cover­ ing the camera lens. On removing the tape the picture became 100% perfect.

It wouldn't be difficult to miss something like this as there is so much protective covering on new equipment.

Best wishes, Adrian

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

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Friday, September 5, 2014

The sports car that runs on SALTWATER

Sports cars may not have the best reputation for being environmentally­friendly, but this sleek machine has been designed to reach 217.5 mph (350 km/h) – using nothing but saltwater.

Its radical drive system allows the 5,070lbs (2,300kg) Quant e­ Sportlimousine to reach 0­ 60 mph (100 km/h) in 2.8 seconds, making it as fast as the McLaren P1.

After making its debut at the 2014 Geneva Motor Show in March, the saltwa­ ter technology has now been certified for use on European roads.

The 920 horsepower (680 kW) Quant e­Sportlimousine uses something known as an electrolyte flow cell power system to power four electric motors within the car.

It works in a similar way to a hydrogen fuel cell, howev­ er, the liquid used for storing energy is saltwater.

The liquid passes through a membrane in between the two tanks, creating an elec­ tric charge. This electricity is then stored and distributed by super capacitors.

The car carries the water in two 200­litre tanks, which in one sitting will allow driv­

ers to travel up to 373 miles (600km).

Overall, the four­seater is 5.25 metres (0.4ft) long, 2.2 metres wide (7.2ft), the 1.35 metre (4.4ft).

Its 22­inch wheels sit just beneath double gull­wing doors which feature 'Chrystal Lake Blue' paint.

Inside is a full­length inter­ active dash, with wood­ theme features and an Android­based entertain­ ment system.

No price or sale date has yet been revealed, but some experts suggest it could cost more than £1 million ($1.7 million) NanoFlowcell AG, a Lichtenstein­based compa­ ny behind the drive, is now planning to test the car on public roads in Germany and elsewhere in Europe as the company prepares for series production.

It claims the technology

offers five times the energy capacity of lithium­ion bat­ teries of the same weight.

'We've got major plans, and not just within the auto­

mobile industry,' says NanoFlowcell AG Chairman of the Board Professor Jens­Peter Ellermann.

'The potential of the

NanoFlowcell is much greater, especially in terms of domestic energy supplies as well as in maritime, rail and aviation technology.'

Friday, September 5, 2014

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Friday, September 5, 2014

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 7 represents B and 3 represents C, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across 1/6 Postpone (3,3) 3 Fundamental (5) 6 See 1 8 Capital of Georgia (7) 9 Free from dirt (5) 10 Loans (5) 11 Make clear (7) 12 Forgive (6) 14 Balanced (6) 17 Duplicate (7) 19 Slightly burn (5) 21 Greeting (5) 22 Put to use (7) 23/25 Neptune, for exam­ ple (3,3) 24 Frightening (5) 25 See 23

Down 1 Flower part (5) 2 Diluting agent (7) 3 Dreamy happiness (5) 4 Tremble (6) 5 Pilot's compartment (7) 6 Last letter of Greek alphabet (5) 7 Money matters (7) 12 Roosts (7) 13 Menacing (7) 15 Flags (7) 16 World's largest desert (6) 18 Bohemian dance (5) 19 Overly sentimental (5) 20 Terminated (5)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Pat, 3 Bossa nova, 8 Raids, 9 Leading, 10 Ire, 11 Ahead, 12 Collide, 13 Sparse, 15 Ushers, 19 Promise, 21 Admit, 23 Mar, 24 Unaware, 25 Traps, 26 Prototype, 27 Sty. Down: 1 Perhaps, 2 Twice, 3 Besides, 4 Select, 5 Avail, 6 Orifice, 7 Argue, 14 Avocado, 16 Startle, 17 Satisfy, 18 Remedy, 19 Plump, 20 Imago, 22 Moans.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross­Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES (6) Across 23 Sy’s red, can look styl­ 1 Like a bird slightly injured ish (6) (6) Down 5 Dairy food for a dirty 2 Adore lookers (but not fighter (6) doers), we hear (7) 8 Spanish painter involved 3 Flies the deer back north in yoga (4) in (5) 9 Ignominious hoax leads 4 Detest scruffy kid’s lie (7) to fuel spill (8) 5 Capital of Belgium has a 10 War paint in defeat dearth of ebony (5) across one quiet street (8) 6 Move otter record to 11 Streak without South canopy (7) African tramp (4) 7 Draw out end, but crew 12 The beloved compiler’s regularly missing (5) expression of dismay (4,2) 13 War returning? Conceal 14 Portray part of old epic television series (7) tale (6) 14 Wasn’t sure about 16 Cold weather from the party, but confused jour­ first of September, instant­ nalist (7) ly (4) 15 Slips company up on 18 False encouragement Saturday (7) before debts (8) 17 No points on afternoon 20 Fashionable police prayers (5) force at hospital depart­ 18 A dialectic name for var­ ment event (8) ious ducks seems back­ 21 Female with hole in her ward (5) footwear (4) 19 An edition for the chil­ 22 Weigh a female donkey dren (5) 23 In fancy clothing (6) STANDARD CLUES Across Down 1 Wounded superficially (6) 2 Hero­worship (7) 5 Dairy product (6) 3 Small flies (5) 8 Spanish painter (4) 4 Aversion (7) 9 Disgraceful (8) 5 Of the darkest colour (5) 10 Coloured cosmetic (8) 11 Long, arduous journey 6 Upper branches and leaves of large woody plant (4) 12 Used to express shock, (7) dismay, disappointment or 7 Draw out (5) sympathy (4,2) 13 Clint Eastwood TV 14 Portray (6) series (7) 16 Precipitation falling from 14 Considered question­ clouds in the form of ice able (7) crystals (4) 15 Vouchers (7) 18 Plausible but false (8) 17 Fifth canonical hour (5) 20 Single distinct event (8) 18 Pintail ducks (5) 21 Footwear (4) 22 Evaluate (6) 19 Edition (5) Last weeks Solution Across:1 Opiate, 5 Grouse, 8 Bond, 9 Bracelet, 10 Relegate, 11 Awed, 12 Berate, 14 Herbal, 16 Item, 18 Marginal, 20 Magnesia, 21 Chin, 22 Falcon, 23 Dorset.

Down: 2 Protege, 3 Addle, 4 Embrace, 5 Grape, 6 Open­air, 7 Suede, 13 Almanac, 14 Harvard, 15 Avarice, 17 Tiara, 18 Mason, 19 Incur.

Wordsearch

The aim of our Word Search puzzle is to find all the 33 words listed below hidden within the puzzle.

Auk Avocet Bunting Crane Crow Curlew Dove Duck Eagle Emu Finch

Flamingo Goose Grebe Heron Hummingbir d Ibis Jay Kestrel Kite Macaw

Magpie Ostrich Owl Pelican Pigeon Plover Quail Raven Rhea Robin Rook

Shrike Skylark Snipe Sparrow Stork Swan Swift Tern Toucan Woodpecker Wren

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD

Improve your Spanish ­ clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Sierras (herramientas) (4) 4 Cream (for face, shoes etc) (5) 9 Bee (5) 10 Recipes (7) 11 Southeast (7) 12 Basket (5) 13 Puddle (6) 15 Mirror (6) 18 Dressing gowns (5) 20 Respuestas (a pre­ guntas, en examen, test) (7) 23 Goddaughter (7) 24 Cebolla (5) 25 Esclavo (5) 26 Zapato (4)

Down 2 Happiness (cheerful­ ness) (7) 3 Costuras (puntadas) (5) 4 Jail (6) 5 Scottish (person) (7) 6 Before (5) 7 Country (nation) (4) 8 Tin (ore) (6) 13 Goats (6) 14 Waterfall (7) 16 Enemy (7) 17 Palacio (6) 19 Colas (de animales, aviónes, cometas) (5) 21 Tiendas (5) 22 Healthy (4)

33

Friday, September 5, 2014 Across 7 British passenger liner, the largest ship in the world when she was built and supposedly unsinkable, that struck an iceberg in the North Atlantic on her maid­ en voyage in April 1912 and sank with the loss of 1,490 lives (7) 8 Government building in Washington where the US Senate and the House of Representatives meet (7) 10 Stew of meat and veg­ etables and hardtack that is eaten by sailors (6) 11 American political move­ ment known for advocating a reduction in the US national debt and federal budget deficit by reducing US government spending and taxes (3,5) 12 Small slender­bodied amphibian with lungs and a well­developed tail, typically spending its adult life on

land and returning to water to breed (4) 13 Communist country in East Asia, established in 1948, whose capital is Pyongyang (5,5) 14 Woman who performs undulating movements of the stomach and rapid gyra­ tion of the hips (5,6) 19 Rastafarian hairstyle in which the hair is washed but not combed and twisted while wet into tight braids or ringlets hanging down on all sides (10) 22 Animal, especially a horse or cow, having a brownish coat thickly sprin­ kled with white or grey (4) 23 Number by which the votes cast for one party or candidate exceed those for the next (8) 24 Thin slice of bacon or ham (6) 25 Fall from a surfboard, especially one that looks

SUDOKU (Easy)

Quiz Word

painful. (7) 26 One of two metal bands joined by a chain, for fas­ tening a person's hands or

ankles (7) Down 1 In baseball, the player who delivers the ball to the

batter (7) 2 Long, narrow French stick loaf (8) 3 Wild and domesticated bird having a heavy body and short legs; now com­ mon in many cities (6) 4 Long­distance running race, strictly one of 26 miles 385 yards (42.195 km) (8) 5 Ceremonial monarch in Japan's system of constitu­ tional monarchy (6) 6 American actor and film director, the first black American actor to achieve superstar status, whose notable films include Lilies of the Field (1963, for which he won an Oscar) and In the Heat of the Night (1967): Sidney ­­­­­­­ (7) 9 Extinct flying reptile of the late Jurassic period, with a long slender head and neck and a very short tail (11) 15 Land imagined by Jonathan Swift that was

inhabited by tiny people (8) 16 High­speed passenger rail service that links London with various European cities via the Channel Tunnel (8) 17 Country in SE Europe, formerly a constituent republic of Yugoslavia, whose capital is Zagreb (7) 18 Small, slender antelope that typically has curved horns and a fawn­coloured coat with white underparts, found in open country in Africa and Asia (7) 20 Group of volcanic islands in the Atlantic Ocean, west of Portugal (6) 21 Popular name given to each of four versions of a composition, created as both paintings and pastels, by the Expressionist artist Edvard Munch between 1893 and 1910: The ­­­­­­ (6)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH

MEDIDAS ­ MEASUREMENTS Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch.

(Answers below)

el año

el vatio

el año luz

el voltio

el día

la hora

el grado

la libra

el metro

la milla

el minuto

la piedra

el nudo

la pulgada

el pie

la semana

el segundo

la tonelada

general QUIZ

ANSEWRS 1. Backstreet Boys 2. New York Marathon 3. Redbud 4. Jack Straw 5. Dragon Flies 6. Angola 7. In The forehead 8.

Margaret Thatcher 9. Round, Square, Arch 10. Kalahari 11.

Madonna 12. Cpacitance

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Word Solution Across: 5 Ottawa, 7 Amethyst, 9 Mantilla, 10 Aviary, 11 Palette knife, 13 Kiosks, 15 Muscle, 18 Harley Street, 21 Lariat, 22 Squeegee, 23 Tenement, 24 Sundae.

Down: 1 Matthews, 2 Hamlet, 3 Geranium, 4 Shrike, 6 Tia Maria, 7 Alaska, 8 Surf, 12 Aloe vera, 14 Spritzer, 16 Sergeant, 17 Jet set, 18 Heifer, 19 Squash, 20 Dace.

Empareja estas palabras ­ Match the Spanish and English words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz.

1.el año, 2.el año luz, 3.el día,

l.the week, m.the light year,

18.la tonelada.

n.the minute, o.the tonne,

4.el grado, 5.el metro, 6.el minuto, 7.el nudo, 8.el pie,

a.the mile, b.the metre,

p.the knot, q.the pound,

9.el segundo, 10.el vatio, 1

c.the day, d.the volt, e.the inch,

r.the foot.

1.el voltio, 12.la hora, 13.la libra,

f.the hour, g.the year,

14.la milla, 15.la piedra,

h.the degree(s), i.the watt,

16.la pulgada, 17.la semana,

Suduko

j.the second, k.the stone,

Span ­ Eng

Quizword

Answers: 1g, 2m, 3c, 4h, 5b, 6n, 7p, 8r, 9j, 10i, 11d, 12f, 13q, 14a, 15k, 16e, 17l, 18o.

1. Which American Vocal Group Scored Their First UK Top Ten Hit In 1996 With 'We Got It Going On'?

2. Which Is Older The New York Marathon Or The London Marathon?

3. what is the common name for cercis canadensis, the state tree of Oklahoma?

4. Which Labour Politician Was Elected MP For Blackburn In 1979?

5. What Type Of Insects Are Hawkers, Clubtails, Biddies, Emeralds, Darts & Skimmers?

6. By what name is Portuguese West Africa now known?

7. Where In The Human Body Is The Pineal Gland?

8. Who Said & I Quote 'There Will Never Be A Woman Prime Minister In My LifeTime'?

9. What Were The Shape Of The 3 Windows In Play School (PFE) (There Were NOT 4 Windows)?

10. In Africa the Namibia Desert merges with which other Desert?

11. Who Had A Hit In 1985 With the Gambler?

12. What Is Measured In Farads?

Word Search

34

Friday, September 5, 2014

TRELI ON THE TELLY MEL MAY B THE STAR

the hype of Cheryl’s return (Nicole S was far more fun), the judge to watch will be ex­ Spicegirl, Mel B. She’s very much part of the court of King Cowell, having been on the How good was it to see Aussie version of The X Simon Cowell back on The Factor, and has hit it big for the last two years on X Factor last weekend, America’s Got Talent. along with the return of Viewers of that on ITV2 will Cheryl Fernandez­Versini know that she doesn’t mince (Cole to you and I!)? her words and isn’t scared to The biting Cowell com­ be different. You know what ments were back and more you get with The X Factor of the silly acts, but despite and I love it, and people

with ALEX TRELINSKI

should get a chill pill and not treat it so seriously. But, I’m hoping for a bit more drama from the live shows, as it was totally obvious from the first audition that Sam Bailey was going to win the last series.

q

A quick mention of Our Zoom which started last Wednesday night on BBC 1.

It’s a top draw heart­warmer about the setting up of Chester Zoo, with stacks of familiar faces in the cast.

One question though: ­ sure­

ly this would have played nicely on a Sunday mid­ evening (Think of the Call The Midwife slot) or are the Beeb running scared of The X Factor? By the way, I can’t wait to find out what sacrifi­ cial lamb they are offering up against Downton Abbey which returns on September 21st.

q

q

It’s the last ever episode of True Blood on FOX UK this Monday night, and with the transmission being a few weeks after the US screenings, I’ve tried to avoid the spoilers on the internet (successfully!). It’s played to record Stateside audiences and I think six series have been enough, especially as in mid­stream it got a bit too serious. The main strength of this vampire­set show has been the humour, and that has strongly returned for the last run, which leaves some great memories of a drama that has dared to be different, and has largely succeeded in that aim.

Talking of US shows and those LA screen­

q

ring Welsh actor, Ioan Gruffudd as an immortal doc­ tor.

Good casts cannot save poor scripts and we now have two perfect examples back to back on a Friday night on BBC1 in two comedies that are just not funny.

Boomers and Big School are clearly being “played out” before the UK autumn kicks in, but it is sad to see so many top per­ formers given lines that are not worthy of their status.

Thank heavens then that Sky One at the same time has brought back the now­BAFTA award­winning, A League Of Their Own. There are loads of great laughs as James Corden skillfully hosts the hour, and yes, many of the lines are scripted, but there was no way that Jamie Redknapp’s tirade over John McEnroe ranking of his ten­ nis prowess was. It was naughty yet wonderful fun.

ings I wrote about a few weeks ago, Sky One have picked up just three pro­ grammes (so far), as they have a pretty full deck any­ way. Crucially for them, they’ve got the rights to the Arrow spin­off, The Flash; they’ve bought “a who’s going to save the world from a killer virus?” thriller called The Last Ship (produced by the Transformers guy Michael Bay, which starts next Friday and has already been booked for a second series); and they’ve taken a gamble on a supernatural drama called Forever star­

Friday September 5 00:35 Texas Rangers 01:55 Holiday Weatherview 02:00 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 The Housing Enforcers 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Street Patrol UK 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 BBC Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Celebrity Pressure Pad 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 A Taste of Britain 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 20:00 The One Show 20:30 A Question of Sport 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Scrappers 22:00 Boomers 22:30 Big School 23:00 BBC News 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:35 Outnumbered

00:20 Horizon 01:20 Panorama 01:50 Melvyn Bragg's Radical Lives

02:50 This Is BBC Two 06:55 Homes Under the Hammer 07:55 Street Patrol UK 08:40 Caught Red Handed 09:10 Fake Britain 09:55 Formula 1 11:35 The Travel Show 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Formula 1 15:35 Equestrian 17:45 Great British Railway Journeys 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Two Tribes 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 Mastermind 21:30 The Hairy Bakers 22:00 The Great British Bake Off: An Extra Slice 22:30 Gardeners' World 23:00 The Perfect Morecambe & Wise 23:30 Newsnight

00:40 01:05 04:00 04:25 05:10 06:05 07:00 09:30 10:25 11:30 13:30 14:30 14:54 14:55 15:00 16:00 16:59 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 23:00 23:30 23:40

The Last Word Jackpot247 Tonight The Jeremy Kyle Show USA ITV Nightscreen The Jeremy Kyle Show Good Morning Britain Lorraine The Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning Jo Frost Family Matters ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather ITV News Meridian Judge Rinder Tipping Point ITV Meridian Weather Who's Doing the Dishes?

The Chase ITV News Meridian ITV News and Weather Emmerdale Coronation Street Gino's Italian Escape Coronation Street Piers Morgan's Life Stories ITV News at Ten and Weather ITV Meridian Weather The Boat That Rocked

PIERS MORGAN: LIFE STORIES New series. Alesha Dixon, the singer and Britain's Got Talent judge chats about her career and per­ sonal life, opening up to Piers about how, after finding fame with Mis­Teeq and as a solo artist, she lost her record contract and found out her husband was having an affair, all in the space of a few weeks. She speaks about being on the receiv­ ing end of a backlash after replacing Arlene Phillips on Strictly Come Dancing.

00:05 Stammer School: Musharaf Finds His Voice 01:05 Worst Place to Be a Pilot 02:05 One Born Every Minute USA 02:55 The Hoarder Next Door 03:50 Time Team Specials 04:45 Sarah Beeny's Selling Houses 05:45 Deal or No Deal 06:40 Kirstie's Vintage Gems 07:00 Countdown 07:45 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 The King of Queens 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss 12:00 Location, Location, Location 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Celebrity Coach Trip 13:35 Come Dine with Me 14:40 Win It Cook It 15:10 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 21:00 The Million Pound Drop 22:00 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 23:00 The Last Leg 23:50 Virtually Famous

01:00 SuperCasino 04:10 Once Upon a Time 04:55 Nick's Quest 05:20 Great Artists 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Peppa Pig 08:00 Pip Ahoy!

08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Little Princess 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Dog Rescuers 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Mystery Woman: In the Shadows 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 Cricket 2014 21:00 Marston's Brewery: One Ale of a Job! 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:35 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side

35

Saturday September 6 03:00 This Is BBC Two 00:05 Live at the Apollo 00:35 EastEnders 02:30 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:35 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 12:30 Football Focus 13:00 BBC News; Weather 13:10 Formula 1 15:30 Live Athletics 17:05 Escape to the Country 17:50 Pointless Celebrities 18:40 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 19:00 Tumble 20:30 Doctor Who 21:20 The National Lottery: In It to Win It 22:10 Casualty 23:00 BBC News; Weather

07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:10 Coast 07:40 Formula 1 09:20 Formula 1 10:55 Formula 1 12:30 The Great British Bake Off: An Extra Slice 13:00 Sweets Made Simple 13:30 Paul Hollywood's Pies & Puds 14:00 Talking Pictures 14:40 Young Winston 17:00 Richard Attenborough: A Life in Film 18:00 Flog It! 19:00 Alex Polizzi: The Fixer 20:00 Proms Extra 20:45 Dad's Army 21:15 Egypt's Lost Queens 22:15 The Ides of March 23:50 QI XL

02:05 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:40 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Pat & Stan 07:25 Dino Dan 07:50 Canimals 08:00 Sooty 08:10 Nerds & Monsters 08:40 Mr Bean: The Animated Series 08:55 Chowder 09:25 ITV News 09:30 Weekend 10:25 The Hungry Sailors 11:25 Murder, She Wrote 12:20 ITV News and Weather 12:29 ITV Meridian Weather 12:30 Columbo: Last Salute to the Commodore 14:25 Catchphrase 15:10 All Star Family Fortunes 15:55 The X Factor 16:55 The Secret of My Success 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:10 ITV News and Weather 19:30 You've Been Framed!

20:00 The Chase 21:00 The X Factor 22:20 Through the Keyhole 23:20 ITV News and Weather 23:34 ITV Meridian Weather 23:35 Knocked Up

00:40 Jimmy Carr: Telling Jokes 01:40 Choke 03:20 Anna & Katy 03:45 The Inbetweeners USA 04:10 Desperate Housewives 04:55 Revenge 05:35 Kirstie's Vintage Gems 05:45 Deal or No Deal 06:40 Rush Zone 07:05 Trans World Sport 08:00 Great North Swim 08:55 The Morning Line 09:55 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:55 Frasier 11:50 The Big Bang Theory 13:10 The Simpsons 14:10 Gadget Man 14:40 Channel 4 Racing 17:10 Come Dine with Me 19:45 Channel 4 News 20:05 Sarah Beeny's Double Your House for Half the Money 21:00 Grand Designs 22:00 Peter Kay: Live & Back on Nights!

23:05 Solomon Kane

KNOCKED UP

23:19 National Lottery Update 23:20 Kevin Bridges Live at the Referendum

00:00 Weather 00:05 American Beauty

Romantic comedy starring Seth Rogen and Katherine Heigl. Alison Scott's career as a televi­ sion journalist is going from strength to strength.

Out on the town to celebrate a promotion, she ends up in bed with amiable slacker Ben Stone and their one­night stand results in an unexpected pregnan­ cy that turns Alison's world upside down.

02:00 The Secret History of Our Streets

00:35 Big Brother: Live from the House 01:15 SuperCasino 04:10 Celebrity Big Brother 05:20 Great Artists 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Angelina Ballerina 07:30 Bubble Guppies 07:40 The Mr Men Show 07:55 Chloe's Closet 08:10 Olly the Little White Van 08:15 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:30 Make Way for Noddy 08:40 City of Friends 08:50 Milkshake! Monkey 09:00 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Wanda and the Alien 09:40 Milkshake! Bop Box 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Jelly Jamm 10:30 LazyTown 11:00 Access 11:10 Police Interceptors 12:10 Police Interceptors 13:10 Police Interceptors 14:10 High Society 16:20 To Hell and Back 18:30 Attack!

20:35 5 News Weekend 20:40 NCIS 22:15 Celebrity Big Brother 23:15 Holiday Love Rats Exposed

Sunday September 7 08:00 Countryfile 00:05 The Heartbreak Kid 01:55 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:00 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 09:30 The Andrew Marr Show 10:30 Live Athletics 13:00 BBC News 13:05 Weather for the Week Ahead 13:10 Formula 1 16:30 Escape to the Country 17:30 The Great British Bake Off 18:30 Songs of Praise 19:05 Deadly 60 on a Mission 19:35 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 20:00 Countryfile 21:00 Strictly Come Dancing 22:15 The Village 23:15 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 23:40 The Secrets

00:35 TOTP2 01:35 First Snow 03:10 This Is BBC Two 07:00 Carnival Boat

09:00 Monty Don's Italian Gardens 10:00 Gardeners' World 10:30 The Beechgrove Garden 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 12:30 Paul Hollywood's Pies & Puds 13:00 Live Athletics 15:30 Bargain Hunt 16:00 Equestrian 19:00 Athletics 19:45 Porridge 20:15 Flog It! 21:15 Countdown to the Invictus Games: Meet the Warriors 22:15 The Two Amigos: A Gaucho Adventure 23:15 Him & Her 23:45 Sex & Drugs & Rock & Roll

01:55 04:00 04:40 07:00 07:25 07:50 08:00 08:10 08:25 08:40 08:55 09:10 09:25 09:30 10:25 11:30 13:10 13:14 13:15 13:45 15:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 19:45 20:00 21:00 22:05

Jackpot247 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA ITV Nightscreen Pat & Stan Dino Dan Canimals Sooty Nerds & Monsters Nerds & Monsters Mr Bean: The Animated Series Chowder Chowder ITV News Weekend Dickinson's Real Deal Carry On Camping ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather The Unforgettable The X Factor Cycling: Tour of Britain Live Long Lost Family You've Been Framed!

ITV Meridian Weather ITV News and Weather Coronation Street The X Factor The Suspicions of Mr Whicher

HOUDINI The first of a two­part drama following the life of legendary illusionist and escape artist Harry Houdini from humble beginnings at circus sideshows to sold­out concert halls. As he finds fame, the magician engages in espionage, battles spiritualists and encounters the greatest names of the era, from US presidents to Arthur Conan Doyle and Rasputin. Adrien Brody takes the title role, with Kristen Connolly as Bess, the love of his life, and Evan Jones as his assistant and confidant Jim Collins.

01:00 The Last Leg 01:45 Homeland 02:40 Hollyoaks 04:45 Sarah Beeny's Selling Houses 05:40 River Cottage Bites 05:50 Deal or No Deal 06:45 Rush Zone 07:10 How I Met Your Mother 07:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:05 British GT Championship 08:30 Triathlon 09:30 National Paralympics Day 10:30 Sunday Brunch 13:30 George Clarke's Amazing Spaces 14:35 The Big Bang Theory 15:00 The Big Bang Theory 15:25 The Big Bang Theory 15:55 The Simpsons 16:25 Fool's Gold 18:35 Deal or No Deal 19:30 Channel 4 News 20:00 How Britain Worked 21:00 Time Team Specials 22:00 Houdini 23:55 The Ugly Truth

00:15 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Psych 01:15 SuperCasino 04:05 Celebrity Big Brother 05:00 House Doctor 05:25 Make It Big 06:15 Angels of Jarm 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Angelina Ballerina 07:30 Bubble Guppies 07:40 The Mr Men Show 07:55 Chloe's Closet 08:10 Olly the Little White Van 08:15 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:30 Make Way for Noddy 08:40 City of Friends 09:00 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Wanda and the Alien 09:40 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:45 Rupert Bear 09:55 Milkshake! Show Songs 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Jelly Jamm 10:30 LazyTown 11:00 Access 11:10 Police Interceptors 14:15 Lassie 16:05 The Shaggy Dog 18:05 Snow Dogs 19:55 5 News Weekend 20:00 Cricket 2014 21:00 World's Worst Disasters 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 Abduction

36

Monday September 8 00:10 21 Up New Generation 02:15 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:20 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 The Housing Enforcers 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Street Patrol UK 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Pressure Pad 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 A Taste of Britain 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Inside Out 21:30 Panorama 22:00 New Tricks 23:00 BBC News 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:35 The Secrets

01:35 02:55 03:50 04:50 07:05 08:05 08:50

Treacle Jr Countryfile Holby City This Is BBC Two Homes Under the Hammer Street Patrol UK Caught Red Handed

09:20 Animal Saints and Sinners 10:05 The Stuarts 11:05 Animal SOS 11:35 Click 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Fred Dibnah's Building of Britain 14:30 The Fred Dibnah Story 15:00 Cash in the Attic 15:30 The Chef's Protege 16:00 Celebrity MasterChef 16:45 Nature's Weirdest Events 17:45 Great British Railway Journeys 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Two Tribes 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 Only Connect 22:00 Alex Polizzi: The Fixer 23:00 Him & Her 23:30 Weather

00:00 ITV News and Weather 00:14 ITV Meridian Weather 00:15 Premiership Rugby Union 01:15 The Store 03:50 Motorsport UK 04:40 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 05:20 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Who's Doing the Dishes?

18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:15 ITV News and Weather 19:45 Emmerdale 20:15 Live International Football 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:40 International Football Highlights

01:45 American Football Live 05:45 British GT Championship 06:10 Gordon Ramsay's Home Cooking 06:40 SuperScrimpers 07:00 Countdown 07:45 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:10 The King of Queens 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 10:30 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss 12:00 Location, Location, Location 13:00 Channel 4 News 13:05 Celebrity Coach Trip 13:35 Come Dine with Me 14:40 Win It Cook It 15:10 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 21:00 Jamie's Comfort Food 21:30 Gadget Man 22:00 Cops and Robbers 23:00 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown

LIVE INTERNATIONAL FOOTBALL Switzerland v England. Coverage of the Euro 2016 Group E qualifier at St Jakob­Park in Basel, where both sides get their campaigns under way. These are the two highest­seeded nations in the group, and Roy Hodgson will be looking to banish memories of a dis­ mal World Cup by claiming all three points against a country he once managed

01:10 Closing Time 02:10 SuperCasino 04:10 Once Upon a Time 05:00 House Doctor 05:25 Make It Big 06:15 Angels of Jarm 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Peppa Pig 08:00 Pip Ahoy!

08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Dog Rescuers 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Stranger with My Face 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 The Billion Dollar Wreck Hunt 21:00 Countdown to Murder 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 Under the Dome

Tuesday September 9 00:05 Boomers 00:35 Live at the Apollo 01:20 Weather for the Week Ahead 01:25 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 The Housing Enforcers 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Street Patrol UK 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 BBC Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Pressure Pad 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 A Taste of Britain 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Holby City 22:00 In the Club 23:00 BBC News 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:35 The Secrets

00:20 The Two Amigos: A Gaucho Adventure 01:20 Scrappers 01:50 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools ­ Writing for Walford 05:30 Schools ­ Regency Life: 3 Lives in 1 Day

06:00 Schools ­ Bringing Books to Life 2 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Street Patrol UK 08:50 Caught Red Handed 09:20 Animal Saints and Sinners 10:05 This World 11:05 Food & Drink 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 The Super League Show 14:45 Cash in the Attic 15:30 The Chef's Protege 16:00 Celebrity MasterChef 16:45 Nature's Weirdest Events 17:45 Great British Railway Journeys 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Two Tribes 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 The £100K House: Tricks of the Trade 22:00 The Motorway: Life in the Fast Lane 23:00 QI 23:30 Weather

00:40 All Star Family Fortunes 01:35 Jackpot247 03:30 UEFA Champions League Weekly 03:55 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:40 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Who's Doing the Dishes?

18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Wilderness Walks with Ray Mears 21:00 Long Lost Family: What Happened Next 22:00 Hot Tub Britain 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:40 Backdraft

DON’T STOP THE MUSIC In this two­parter, internationally renowned classi­ cal pianist James Rhodes, who believes that the power of music can change lives, is on a mission to launch the nation's biggest­ever `instrument amnesty', and is asking the public to donate unused instruments to children who could benefit from them. In the first edition, James visits St Teresa's Primary School in Basildon, Essex, which was placed in special measures after its most recent Ofsted inspection.

00:00 NFL: The American Football Show 01:00 No 03:05 Scandal 03:50 Mammon 04:55 Sarah Beeny's Selling Houses 05:50 River Cottage Bites 06:05 Deal or No Deal 07:00 Countdown 07:45 Will & Grace 08:10 The King of Queens 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss 12:00 Location, Location, Location 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Celebrity Coach Trip 13:35 Come Dine with Me 14:40 Win It Cook It 15:10 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 21:00 Posh Pawn 22:00 Don't Stop the Music 23:00 Worst Place to Be a Pilot

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 Countdown to Murder 01:55 SuperCasino 04:10 Once Upon a Time 05:00 Nick's Quest 05:20 Great Artists 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 08:00 Pip Ahoy!

08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Dog Rescuers 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 The Boy She Met Online 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 Meerkat Manor 20:30 The Secret Life of Pets 21:00 Cowboy Builders 22:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:00 Celebrity Big Brother

37

Wednesday September 10 00:05 Scrappers 00:35 Biker Boyz 02:20 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:25 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 The Housing Enforcers 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Street Patrol UK 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 BBC Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Pressure Pad 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 A Taste of Britain 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 20:00 The One Show 21:00 The Great British Bake Off 22:00 Our Zoo 23:00 BBC News 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:35 The Secrets

00:20 Hotel India 01:20 The Super League Show 02:05 Kate Adie's Women of World War One 03:05 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Operation Cloud Lab: Secrets of the Skies 05:30 Science of the Harvest 06:00 Schools: The Science of Space Dive

06:30 The Great British Year 06:55 Schools ­ Wonders of Nature: Damselfly ­ Danger/Safety 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Street Patrol UK 08:45 Caught Red Handed 09:15 Animal Saints and Sinners 10:00 Coast 11:00 Red Arrows: Inside the Bubble 12:00 BBC News 12:30 Daily Politics 14:00 The Fred Dibnah Story 14:30 The Fred Dibnah Story 15:00 Cash in the Attic 15:30 The Chef's Protege 16:00 Celebrity MasterChef 16:45 Nature's Weirdest Events 17:45 Great British Railway Journeys 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Two Tribes 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 Hotel India 22:00 Horizon 23:00 Some People with Jokes 23:30 Weather

02:10 03:55 04:45 06:05 07:00 09:30 10:25 11:30 13:30 14:30 14:55 14:55 15:00 16:00 16:59 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30 23:40

Jackpot247 Loose Women ITV Nightscreen The Jeremy Kyle Show Good Morning Britain Lorraine The Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather ITV News Meridian Dickinson's Real Deal The Alan Titchmarsh Show ITV Meridian Weather Who's Doing the Dishes?

The Chase ITV News Meridian ITV News and Weather Emmerdale Coronation Street Celebrity Squares Scott & Bailey ITV News at Ten and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Through the Keyhole

00:05 Educating the East End 01:00 Poker 01:55 Hard Knocks 02:50 KOTV Boxing Weekly 03:20 Great North Swim 04:15 Trans World Sport 05:10 Triathlon 06:05 National Paralympics Day 07:00 Countdown 07:45 Will & Grace 08:10 The King of Queens 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss 12:00 Location, Location, Location 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Celebrity Coach Trip 13:35 Come Dine with Me 14:40 Win It Cook It 15:10 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 21:00 Sarah Beeny's Double Your House for Half the Money 22:00 Grand Designs 23:00 All Creatures Great and Stuffed

CELEBRITY SQAURES

New series. Life's Too Short star Warwick Davis hosts a revival of the classic game show original­ ly presented by Bob Monkhouse. The idea is based on Noughts and Crosses with a giant grid of nine boxes. The contestants say whether they agree or disagree with the general­knowledge answers given by the famous faces inside each box. If they are correct they claim that square, and the first to get three in a line wins the round and the money. One participant then goes on to play for the star prize.

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 01:55 SuperCasino 04:10 Once Upon a Time 05:00 Michaela's Wild Challenge 05:20 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Peppa Pig 08:00 Pip Ahoy!

08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 I Dream of Murder 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 Ultimate Police Interceptors 21:00 World's Worst Journeys from Hell 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 Wentworth Prison

Thursday September 11 00:05 Room 101 ­ Extra Storage 00:45 Rounders 02:40 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 The Housing Enforcers 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Street Patrol UK 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 BBC Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Pressure Pad 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 A Taste of Britain 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 DIY SOS 22:00 Who Do You Think You Are? 23:00 BBC News 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:35 Scotland Decides: The Big, Big Debate

00:20 Countdown to the Invictus Games: Meet the Warriors 01:20 The Motorway: Life in the Fast Lane 02:20 Who Do You Think You Are? 03:20 Doctor Who 04:10 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools ­ A Question of Faith 06:00 What Makes Me, Me 06:35 Schools ­ Seeking Refuge

06:55 Schools ­ Wonders of Nature: Caterpillar to Butterfly ­ Change 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Street Patrol UK 08:50 Caught Red Handed 09:20 Animal Saints and Sinners 10:05 Escape to the Continent 11:05 Gardeners' World 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 The Fred Dibnah Story 14:30 The Fred Dibnah Story 15:00 Cash in the Attic 15:30 The Chef's Protege 16:00 Celebrity MasterChef 16:45 Nature's Weirdest Events 17:45 Great British Railway Journeys 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Two Tribes 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 The Invictus Games 21:00 Operation Stonehenge: What Lies Beneath 22:00 Penguins on a Plane: Great Animal Moves 23:00 Mock the Week 23:30 Newsnight

00:40 The Cube 01:35 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:40 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Who's Doing the Dishes?

18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Paul O'Grady: For the Love of Dogs 22:00 Chasing Shadows 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:40 Hot Tub Britain

PENGUINES ON A PLANE Despite the ratings­grabbing title, this two­parter isn't quite the action thriller it sounds. Rather, it's an insightful documentary revealing how thou­ sands of exotic animals are moved around the world every day, and how they cope with being transported.

00:00 999: What's Your Emergency?

01:00 One Born Every Minute USA 01:55 Adam 03:30 Gaslight 04:55 Sarah Beeny's Selling Houses 05:55 River Cottage Bites 06:05 Deal or No Deal 07:00 Countdown 07:45 Will & Grace 08:10 The King of Queens 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:25 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:55 Frasier 10:25 Frasier 10:55 Undercover Boss 11:55 Location, Location, Location 12:55 Channel 4 News Summary 13:00 Celebrity Coach Trip 13:25 Come Dine with Me 14:30 Channel 4 Racing 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 21:00 Location, Location, Location 22:00 Educating the East End 23:00 Cops and Robbers

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 Big Brother: Live from the House 01:55 SuperCasino 04:05 Once Upon a Time 05:00 Michaela's Wild Challenge 05:20 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Peppa Pig 08:00 Pip Ahoy!

08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Dog Rescuers 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Web of Desire 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 The Railway: First Great Western 21:00 Police Interceptors 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 Dallas

38

Friday, September 5, 2014

AUCTIONS

ACCOUNTANTS Pro Business Support – for all your accountancy needs in English; bookkeep­ ing, taxes, wage slips and more. We cater for compa­ nies and self­employed peo­ ple; we can deal with every­ thing for you. Call us on 966 923 963 for first consultation free of charge.

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY

This profitable, established leasehold restaurant has a fully fitted modern kitchen, disabled facilities and a fresh recently painted interi­ or. directbusinessbrokers .com Tel 966 44 33 81 Ref. DB6435L 97,000€ Large successfully run leasehold Beauty Salon near Quesada. Spacious salon with 7 rooms and rental income from separate hair salon. All fitness machines, treatment beds and tables included in the sale. directbusinessbro­ kers.com Tel 966 44 33 81 Ref. DB6457L 42,000€ Excellent opportunity to pur­ chase a well established and thriving leasehold

Bar/Cafeteria in a central location in Torrevieja.

Beautiful established garden and south west facing ter­ race with BBQ and all year round trade. directbusiness­ brokers.com Tel 966 44 33 81 Ref. DB6456L 20,000€ Lively, popular leasehold Bar & Restaurant in a lovely position on La Manga over­ looking the port. Fully fitted kitchen and extensive sunny terraces. Freehold also available for purchase and flat above the premises. directbusinessbrokers.com Tel 966 44 33 81 Ref. DB6455L 150,000€ Profitable leasehold Café Bar, competitively priced for quick sale. Air conditioned interior with stylish decor and large terraces. Multiple income streams: food, drink, internet facilities, games and ice cream. Offering great potential for further growth. directbusinessbrokers.com Tel 966 44 33 81

Ref. DB6446L 74,950€ Beautifully presented lease­ hold Garden Furniture Business, recently reduced in price. A successful and easy to run business with established website, signifi­ cant internet sales, cus­ tomer database and excel­ lent reputation locally. direct­ businessbrokers.com Tel 966 44 33 81

CHOIR Casa Tom Community Choir: From 8 September 2014, Casa Tom Community Choir meets every Monday at 2.00pm for 2.30pm. It is a mixed choir and all levels

AUTO ENGINEERING

Torrevieja Christian Fellowship at Avenida de las Cortes Valencianas 68, Torrevieja 03183, welcome residents and visitors alike, to their friendly and lively 10.30 am. Service each Sunday morning.

During the month of August they will not be holding the

Wednesday night meeting at 6.00 pm. For further infor­ mation and/or directions please telephone 966700391 or visit our web­ site on www.tcf­spain.org."

International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja.

Evangelical non­denomina­ tional church. Sunday serv­ ices 11am.

Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm.

Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nation­ alities welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276.

Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3.

Pilar de la Horadada.

CARPENTER

HIRE CENTRE

are welcome. No auditions, no solos. Make new friends and have a good time.

Location: Casa Tom, Avenida JACA 31, San Luis, Torrevieja. Phone or email Terry for details. Phone: 647­189­135.

Email: casatomsanluis@gmail.com

CHURCH SERVICES

BLINDS BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES Ref. DB6460L 85,000€ Restaurant in enviable loca­ tion with no local competi­ tion and regular clientele.

CATERING

BARBER

CONSTRUCTION

ALARMS

CLEANERS

39

Friday, September 5, 2014 Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Prayer and Praise and Worship. Home groups meet during the week. All welcome from any church background or none. For further information contact PilarChristian.CommunityC hurch@gmail.com 968575417 or 966848806.

Reg No:2009­SG/A The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) meet at 10.00 each Sunday at their Torrevieja meetinghouse in

GARDENER

the Torreaguas building on the corner of Rambla Juan Mateo Garcia 104, close to the windmill in Torrevieja, 667 533 597.

The rainbow centre for spiri­ tual awareness We meet in the function room at sacos bar el leiminar just of the CV 905 Rojales to torrievieja road We have a divine serv­ ice on Sundays at 11am and on Wednesdays we hold an evening of clairvoyance at 7.30 pm Also on Wednesdays there is an open circle at 5.30 for those who are interested in clair­ voyance Healing is always available by certified healers after each meeting A warm welcome to friends old and new The mediums for the month of July 2014 are Wednesdays 2nd Debbie Blevins 9th Belinda & Jill 16th Trish and Shirley 23rd Sammy Fitzsimons 30th Paul & jennet. Closed until august 31st then Belinda &

CAR BREAKERS

Sandra. Sundays 6th Paul & jennet 13th Belinda Bradley 20th ray bailey 27th Trish.

For further information call Trish on 966 844 795 or Email the rainbowcentre­ costablana@gmail.com

CARS FOR SALE Car insurance quotes – new extra discount on fully comprehensive policies at the price of third party!

Excellent prices for expats, all policies and call centre staff in English. We will call you back with a quote. 966 923 963

INSURANCE CASER SEGUROS ­ for all your insurance needs, home, car, health, funeral.

Policies available in English and German.

Call Professional Business Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from our friendly staff.

FOR SALE FISHING BOAT 4 man Seahog Shorty 60hp out­ board, GPS, fishfinder, radio and trailer ( Torre de la Horadada).Starting prob­ lems with engine. Bargain €3500 phone 00447792307435 PORTABLE AIRCON UNIT Hot and cold complete with flexible exhaust and fittings.

As new condition, hardly used (Holiday home).

Bargain €99 phone 00447792307435

GUITAR LESSONS

PROPERTY FOR RENT Santiago de la Ribera 2 bed­ room townhouse close to beach and shops with com­ munal pool €350 monthly short or long term lease Call 0044 7890996330 ­ 968570645 (162) Ref: 61, A lovely two bed­ roomed ground floor apart­ ment, located in the centre of the small Spanish town of Los Montesinos, With a pleasant communal swim­

ming pool adjacent & all amenities in walking dis­ tance. Long and short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

LONG TERM RENTALS WANTED! Properties, all types, in the Torrevieja area wanted for long term rentals.

Call us on 96 692 3963 2 or 3 bed / 2 bath apart­ ments in San Miguel. Lift, communal rooftop pool & solarium, video entry sys­

UPHOLSTERY CLEANING

Guitar lessons for beginners and improvers. Provide an insight into most styles.

From 10€ per hour. Call Peter on 966789612 or 629975378. Torrvieja Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.vil­ laandvacation.com or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

DRAINAGE PETS

40

Friday, September 5, 2014

BPP­1808 230,000€ ­ 3 BEDROOM DETACHED HOUSE FOR SALE in LOS MONTISINOS, ALICANTE, SPAIN TEL: 966443381 BPP1804 3 bedroom detached villa a spacious family Villa Torrevieja For Sale fully furnished 240,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2896 Old style spanish 4 bedroom detached Monte Zenia property reasonably priced 175,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2897 3 BEDROOM SEMI­DETACHED HOUSE FOR SALE Aguas Nuevas 193,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2898 2 BEDROOM BUNGALOW FOR SALE Aguas Nuevas 125,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2901 2 Bedroom apart­ ment Aguas Nuevas 73,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2906 Large 3 BED­ ROOM BUNGALOW FOR SALE Aguas Nuevas 135,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP 2907 Exceptional value 2 BEDROOM APARTMENT FOR SALE €49,950 Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2908 Excellent location 3 BEDROOM DETACHED HOUSE FOR SALE Villamartin €269,000 Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2903 Huge Executive 3 BEDROOM APARTMENT FOR SALE Los Montesinos €165,000 Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2899 2 BEDROOM BUNGALOW FOR SALE Torrevieja 59,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 Del Este, Santa Pola ­ 4 bedroom Duplex within a

Secure Small Private Community. It has an inte­ gral large garage with sink, washing machine, large storage area. Independent large bedroom and full bath­ room.

American style kitchen, three bathrooms and cloakroom, front and back terraces, large solari­ um with bbq and shower, well maintained with a/c, ceiling fans. Communal Pool and third line from the beach. Sold with all white goods and furnished for 210,000 euros. 699613155 Ref: KP3100, €183,000.

Three bedroom, two bath­ room detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool.

Garage to side of house.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Immaculate ground floor Duplex, 2 beds, 2 bath, Private Parking, Situated in Novamar, Gran Alacant.

Price includes very tasteful furniture and white goods.

Walking distance to all local amenities and beach. Now only 129,750 euros. Ref No K24. 627 711 155 2 Bed, 1 Bath Ground floor duplex. Central heating, Grills, Fully furnished, Glazed in Galleria, 2 com­ munal pools, private parking and walking distance to the Gran Alacant commercial centre. Situated in the popu­ lar urbanisation of Puerto Marino. Now only 96,500 euros for quick sale Ref No. K46. 627 711 155 Recently reduced 4 Bed, 3 Bath Villa, in Gran Alacant.

Quiet Location, Exceptional Views. Converted Under build, 2 Lounges, 2 Kitchens, Private Garage and being sold Fully Furnished, now only 239.950 Ref: L81 Tel. 680333242

PLUMBERS

POOL TABLES

tem. Available for short or long term rent from 350 pcm. Tel 966723437 or 616 493 487. (184)

PROPERTY FOR SALE

Gran Alacant Detached villa, located in a very sought after location.Situated on a 560m2 S/W facing plot and constructed in 2005.

Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms (2 full baths), Lounge­Diner, fully equipped Kitchen, Porch and Solarium with Alicante & Sea Views. ref.L81. €258,000 neg.

Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant Town House with a difference.

2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Quiet Location, Extra storage areas, and South Facing Private Pool as well as 2 communal pools. Fully Furnished, All mod cons.

Greenland Views and all local amenities close by.

Ref. No L79. 179.000 euros 680 333 242 2 Bedroom, 2 Bathroom, Unfurnished Mid Terraced Townhouse in GA. Recently decorated throughout means this property is a very clean black canvass.

Has Air­Con & Security Grills and the use of a Communal Pool. Price recently reduced to 110.000e Ref.K12 Tel. 627711155 Reduced for a quick sale to 95.000 e 2 Bedroom, 1 bath­ room, Top Floor Duplex in Gran Alacant. Very Modern Property with Many extras.

Glazed in Porch, Roof Top Solarium, Wooden Flooring.

Immaculate condition and ready to move in. Ref. K15 Tel. 627711155.

Gran Alacant, Situated in the "Alto" part of Gran Alacant, this 3 bedroomed, 4th floor apartment, offers luxury accommodation, with absolutely stunning sea views, as well as views of Alicante bay and the famous Santa Barbara Castle.The apartment is 89 square meters with open plan kitchen / living room and includes all electrical appli­ ances & furniture also there is a utility room, open ter­ race, and private parking.

The urbanisation also offers many communal pools, ten­ nis courts, restaurants and bars. Ref. K20 €109,000 Tel 680333242 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.com Gran Alacant villa located in a very quiet area , situated at the end of a cul­de­sac means there is no through traffic.3 bed, 3 bath, 330m2 plot, established large gar­ dens, working fireplace, solar panel for hot water,pri­ vate parking, south facing great views, fully furnished, fantastic opportunity. ref.

L85. €215,000 Tel 680333242 Beach front Line property, over looks Carabassi Beach, Gran Alacant. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Secure Underground Parking, Fully furnished, Roof Top Solarium. 3 Large

Communal Pools, Fantastic communal Gardens, Tennis Courts and much more.

125.000 Euros Ref No. K23.

Tel. 627 711 155 Lovely clean detached Villa just as you enter Gran Alacant. Very central loca­ tion, 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Garden Shed, Private Parking, Attractive Gardens, Private pool Ref: K59 240.000e Tel. 627711155 Offers Invited on a mid Terraced Town house in Gran Alacant. Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Lounge Diner, Galleria, Solarium, Under build.

Communal Pool and Gardens, and with Exceptional Views of Alicante. Being Sold Fully Furnished including White Goods. Ref. K42 Tel. 627711155 (reasonable offers only) Gran Alacant, Situated on the very first urbanisation as you enter Gran Alacant, this 2nd floor duplex offers taste and quality. Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, lounge­diner, independent kitchen, full roof­top solari­ um with superb views and recently glazed in porch offering extra living area as well as extra privacy as the

STONE CRAFT

glass is mirrored. Ref.K44 €108,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant south­facing, very private villa, with wood­ land and Alicante views.

Situated at the end of a small cul­de­sac which means this villa enjoys a very peaceful location.3 Bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 3 Bathrooms, lounge­diner with working fireplace, fully fitted kitchen with including white goods, large front porch, solarium,workshop and stor­ age in under build, central heating, air con H/C, ceiling fans, grills, UK T.V, off road parking and plenty of out­ side parking also. Due to its orientation of this property enjoys full sun, all day, something very important in the winter months. Ref.K24. €237,000 Tel 680333242

QUIZZES Experienced quiz­ master/question setter with personality available to host quiz nights in local bars.

Tel:­ 664 838 581

SITUATIONS VACANT RADIO COSTA INTERNA­ TIONAL needs motivated sellers. Spanish, English and German language is a bonus but not essential.

Training and good earnings guaranteed. For more info call 644 126 600 or email info@radicocostainterna­ tional.com

SITUATIONS WANTED Gardening, property mainte­ nance, translations, cheap rates call David 722521654.

REMOVALS

SOLICITORS

WANTED

Need English speaking solicitors in Torrevieja?

Let us help to solve your problems with debt recov­ ery, divorce, property, fraud, criminal defence. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your specialist solicitor today

WIG SPECIALIST SALON MARGARETHAS, 23 years in Torrevieja Hair/Wig specialist for Medical illness and Hair Loss problems. We offer dif­ ferent Hair Replacements, top fillers, Hair prostheses, Toupees and Wigs, Natural and Artificial hair and much more. Also fashion/festival accessories TV/TS are wel­ come to our service. Please call our salon reception for an appointment with Margaretha on Tel no 966 921 846 Torrevieja (90)

POOLS

SURVEYOR

VAN HIRE

Friday, September 5, 2014

Greenside Gossip

41

IVIE DAVIES takes a weekly look at the golf scene - golfdavies@gmail.com

BUNKERED OVER PRICES

Over the past few weeks, I have started to see a steady increase in green fees. For the visiting golfer now, the Low season is coming to an end, and there is also a trend to divide the year up into more categories like, High, Medium and Low seasons.

This I guess is to justify higher prices, and in some cases the Low season lasts for just July and August .The High Season takes in March, April, October and November, whereas, Mid­ season is January, February, May, September and December. I have even heard of the same policy for buggy pricing. The High Season prices are now exceeding 60 euros with a buggy, with others asking for over 70 euros!

Why, oh why do they not have one price all the year round?

Then we would all know where we are (To coin a phrase).

Not so long ago a reader’s letter who felt that we should con­ sider that, here in Spain, winter golf is a bonus. He did agree that golf here was getting too expensive, which was his rea­ son for not playing, and that the courses had a similarity to UK supermarkets and had become just money making machines. He went on to say that it is not a god given right to play golf here in the winter and perhaps we should play off temporary mats and on temporary greens to allow the green­keepers to get on and do their job, like in Britain.

Having played golf in Spain for twenty years, it is only in recent times, that golfers have been asked to put up with the inferior facilities that are on offer. Perhaps the golf courses have served their purpose in attracting the house buyer, so

now the developers do not give a damn. I think that some of the comments are not that just over winter golf, but more about the grasses, when they change appearance. Yes, Bermuda grass does go dormant in the winter but the hybrid grasses such as Tifway 419 and Tifgreen 328 are resistant to wear and quickly regenerate when the weather gets warmer. They are also water quality, drought and wear toler­ ant. Other Bermuda hybrids cope well with cooler conditions, and are readily available ­ but do courses care or know?

What does create mud­heaps, is not the winter season of the year (Spain’s high season), but possibly poor course management, maintenance and cost. When there are tem­ porary greens there are no financial benefits for putting up with only part of a course. So why should golfers under­ stand? There are courses around our region that have greens and tees in use all year round, because, they have designed and constructed the greens and tees correctly, and they have good maintenance programmes and control the golfing traffic. We are not looking for Open championship courses but courses of quality, which are aesthetically pleas­ ing and provide a good test of golf and are kept in good con­ dition.

Bare mud heaps on the tees are mainly due to the fact that the green­keepers staff do not move the tee blocks on a reg­ ular basis. They should be moved daily, and then the previ­ ous day’s playing area divots should be sand/ seeded, but in most cases they are just left to become an eye sore. Golf green­keeping is all about presentation. When golfers see winter work being carried out, they also want to see the results of the labour. We see roped off areas around putting greens, but no maintenance has been carried out, and once you have a bare piece of soil it would seem they rope the area off, and that’s it!

Temporary tees and mats only serve to remind golfers of municipal golf. Municipal golf is fine and I’m not knocking it, with most golfers starting off their love of the sport on such courses, but when you’re paying 70 euros for a green fee they are not acceptable. Constructors and course designers

KNOW YOUR RULES QUESTION In a hazard, a player’s ball lies against a movable obstruc­ tion. A loose impediment lies on top of the obstruction in such a position that the player cannot remove the obstruction with­ out also moving the loose impediment. The player is entitled to move the movable obstruction under Rule 24­1 but is not entitled to move the loose impediment under Rule 23. What is the procedure?

ANSWER The player may remove the obstruction as authorized by Rule 24­1. As the loose impediment will be moved in the process, in equity (Rule 1­4), the player incurs no penalty and must place the loose impediment as near as possible to the spot where it originally lay. If the player fails to place the loose impediment as required, in equity (Rule 1­4) and in view of the purpose of Rule 13­4, he would lose the hole in match play or incur a penalty of two strokes in stroke play.

Loose Impediments (Rule 23) If you remove a loose impediment and this causes your ball to move, the ball must be replaced and (unless your ball was on the putting green) you incur a one­stroke penalty.

should build larger teeing areas to spread the wear, or con­ struct a teeing area purposely for “winter golf”. I accept as do most golfers, that from time to time you need to have tempo­ rary greens when hollow tinning, but tees NO! However, they must be a well prepared area that gives a true putting sur­ face, not just cut out on the fairway as is nearly always the case. When these temporary greens are used, they should have temporary markers to show the distance of the hole, and not leave the golfer to guess the distance.

Yes! Winter maintenance is essential. Yes! There is more golf traffic in the winter than summer, since this is Spain and the climate here is (normally) very mild. That’s why Spanish golf is advertised so widely, but courses can and should be constructed, managed and maintained accordingly, in line with the green fees that are being demanded. But it is not only green fees that are out of line with the product on sale.

A recent experience started more bells ringing, other than that on cash registers.

All resident and tourist golfers are aware of the four euro pint, well cop this! I was in a golf clubhouse with some friends and decided to have one of my favourite delicacies, chips:­ yes those cholesterol busting slivers of potato, with vinegar and tomato sauce. There were five of us, so I asked for a large portion (plate), and these were quickly devoured and a second plate was ordered. The problem occurred when the bill came. Apparently we had had six portions, three on each large plate and the cost was ­­­­ Wait for it!

Wait for it! 27.60 euros ­ that’s 4.60 euros a portion, in English money £3.80 for a small portion of chips and we had six of these. This was topped (no not the chips) with a 3.80

euros pint of shandy! This was at a club that is struggling to get a golf course together and struggling on catering snacks.

No more chips at this rip off joint. Come on Golf Directors, let’s not get back to the old days when expat golfers could not afford to play and took up other activities. Think on already, as three courses have closed in the past twelve months.

TITTER ON THE TEE A golfer gets hit on the head by a wayward shot and is taken to hospital. He finally awoke from his coma. Stiff as a board and in pain in the hospital's ICU, with tubes up his nose & down his throat, wires monitoring every function and a gorgeous nurse hovering over him. It was obvious he'd been in a serious accident.

She gave him a deep and steady heartfelt look straight in the eyes and he heard her slowly say, "You may not feel anything from the waist down."

He somehow managed to mumble in reply, "Can I feel your boobs, then?"

42

Friday, September 5, 2014

ELCHE’S LATE SHOW MADRID SHOCKER ELCHE 1 GRANADA 1

Granada thought they were leaving the Martínez Valero with all three points, after Fran Rico gave the visitors an 81st minute lead. It wasn’t to be though as Elche bat­ tled their way back, David Lombán (pic­ tured celebrating) scoring a dramatic equaliser right at the death, close to mid­ night last Sunday.

Elche's Edu Albacar had an early header tipped over by Roberto Fernandez and they went close again four minutes later when Cristian Jonathas headed Damian Suarez's corner wide. Isaac Success had Granada's first real effort but his 20­yard strike flashed wide. Garry Rodrigues tested Roberto with a left­foot attempt after Piti's corner was not properly cleared, but the keeper was equal to the task. Granada grew into the game as the first half went on and Youssef El Arabi drew a close­range save from Przemyslaw Tyton. The Polish international then also tipped Jonathas' shot around the post before Enzo Roco fired over from the resulting corner to leave the scoreline goalless at half­time.

The second half became scrappy, with

Elche's Suarez and Rodrigues and Granada's Rico and Ruben Rochina all booked before the hour mark. It was almost into the last 10 minutes before Granada were able to break their hosts down, but Dimitri Foulquier dragged his shot wide.

There was no such mistake from Rico two minutes later, though, the midfielder slot­ ting home from six yards after being set up

by Success. But having fallen behind, Elche finally showed as an attacking force once more and snatched an equaliser in the first minute of injury time. Albacar was the provider, crossing from the left for Lomban to finish at the far post, with the referee then blowing the final whistle.

Elche manager Fran Escribá said:­ “This point has great psychological value. It’s always important to add points and for us to see that we’re a competitive team. The fans have left satisfied, even though we’ve only gained a point.”

The international break means that Elche’s next match is a Sunday lunchtime encounter at Rayo Vallecano on September 14th.

REAL SOCIEDAD 4 REAL MADRID 2

Real Madrid surrendered a two­goal lead after just 11 minutes as they crashed to a shock La Liga defeat at struggling Real Sociedad on Sunday. Madrid had looked set to sweep Sociedad aside as they struck twice early on through Sergio Ramos and Gareth Bale while also hitting the woodwork through the Spain defender. The visitors also had a number of other chances to increase their lead before Sociedad staged a stunning comeback that saw them snatch the victory through goals from Inigo

Martinez, pictured celebrating (36), David Zurutuza (41 and 65) and Carlos Vela (76).

Madrid had opportunities to set up a frantic finale but Sami Khedia headed over, Enaut Zubikarai denied James Rodriguez and Karim Benzema hit the outside of the post as they left San Sebastian empty­handed.

They’ll need to get their act quickly together as their next match after the international break is a home meeting a week on Saturday with the La Liga champions, Atletico Madrid.

NEW BOY ON THE BLOCK VILLARREAL 0 BARCELONA 1

TORRY PAY THE PENALTY UTIEL 0 CD TORREVIEJA 0

Sandro Ramirez scored his first senior goal for Barcelona to help them to a narrow 1­0 win at Villarreal, and two wins from their first two matches. Luis Enrique's men had looked distinctly out of sorts at El Madrigal until the teenager's 82nd­minute goal, failing to zip the ball around in their usual manner. They struggled to get too many sights of Villarreal's goal and only the

woodwork meant they were not behind.

Sandro ­ the 19­year­old academy gradu­ ate ­ ensured they went home with the spoils, though, tapping in a cross from Lionel Messi who was frustrated by the Villarreal defence all night. Barcelona’s next match after the international break is a week on Saturday when they entertain Athletic Bilbao.

MONTE’S DOZEN

A late penalty miss deprived Torrevieja of maximum points from last Sunday’s fix­ ture, with Carrasco blowing a chance to give Torry two wins out of two.

The first half was a fairly even affair with Carrasco and Rafa being kept quiet by a tough Utiel defence, whilst at the other end, a goal­line clearance from Alexis kept the visitors on level terms at half­time.

Striker Steve Ekedi came on with an hour gone, and he added more bite up front, and was involved in the best move of the match when a slick interplay between Brani, himself, Carrasco and Rafa ended with an unusually off target shot high from the latter from the edge of the area.

Torry pressed hard for the winner and Utiel became more and more desperate.

Referee Pintado was weak, issuing no less than 10 cautions, but missing hosts of infringements and keeping well out of the way when the a lot of pushing and shoving ended in a 18 man melee! He did however, award a penalty to Torry with 10 minutes to go as Alexis was hauled down in the box and dragged along it.

Steve had blasted home from the spot in a friendly against Cartagena, so it was surprising to see Carrasco assume the responsibility. His 79th minute kick was not fierce enough nor well placed, with Alfredo guessing right and punching it away. Torry pressed until the final whistle but not before Steve made a rash tackle and was shown his second yellow card and thus dismissed, which meant he was suspended for Wednesday’s home clash with Muro.

CD Montesinos handed out a 12­nil thrashing to Cuidad D Elx FC last Saturday night, writes ANDREW ATKINSON, to take the annual Full Monte Trophy challenge. Not surprisingly Edu and Vazquinho were amongst the goals in the one­sided romp, and Vaz was afterwards presented with the top league goal­scorer’s trophy for last season.

Monte’s next pre­sea­ son friendly is tomorrow night (Saturday) when they take on Union Ilicitana from Elche with a 7.30pm kick off.

Friday, September 5, 2014

43

C A P TA I N C Y

DOES IT REALLY MATTER? He was made football captain because he was good at football: cricket captain because he was good at cricket; and vice­captain because he was good at… everything.

So runs the old joke ­ but seriously, don’t we British make far too much of the role of captaincy? Certainly we do when compared to other footballing countries. There the job sen­ sibly seems to go to the most experienced member of the team. Back in 1982, here in Spain, the World Cup winners were Italy, cap­ tained by their 40­year­old goalkeep­ er, the legendary Dino Zoff.

Similarly when Spain won in 2010 it was their goalkeeper Igor Casillas who lifted the Cup. Goalies? England wouldn’t…

Question: who lifted the World Cup this summer for Germany in Brazil? Why, the smallest, per­ haps most undemonstra­ ble character on the field: it was full back Philipp Lahm who actually raised the Cup, but it

OSCAR FOOLED CD TORREVIEJA 1 MURO 1

was unanimously done, a real team effort ­ which is how it should be. All this evidence points to the fact that if the team are OK, everyone’s doing their job properly and are well­ briefed before the game, then no­one needs a ‘superior’ indi­ vidual shaking his fist at you (see below) or encouraging you with a friendly arm round the shoulder – and in any case any other member of a real ‘team’ can and will oblige.

It really is not much more that leading ‘em out, calling heads or tails, and generally doing what any of the seniors – and some well­meaning juniors of teams already do, i.e. talk it up to each other to raise team morale, along the style of ’C’mon lads, let’s get stuck in lads, we can do it…’ etc. All good, clean stuff, no?

I only really remember one captain I played under during a number of games when younger. ‘Wally’ was a huge hulk whose knuckles dragged as he walked: a frightening­looking individual with bushy mutton­chop sideboards adorning his belligerently red face, above a huge barrel chest. Ugly? Quasimodo wasn’t in it. Wally was a terrifying tackler and as he did, he emitted a loud growl, which turned into a bellow when he got mad… which was often. He was our centre half and leader everywhere: on the field, in the dressing room and definitely in the bar. Wally was the sort of individual you didn’t cross, irrespective of whether he was on your side or not (the fact that I was ‘seeing’ his sister­in­law on the quiet was worrying…). I always followed Wally’s f­worded ‘instructions’ to the letter – so yes, that type of captaincy certainly

motivated me ­ but you don’t see his type of ‘leadership’ today ­ thank goodness.

So now (some) Manchester United and English football followers have recently become excited, once again (yawn), about the captaincy of their club and country. Even Louis van Gaal has been drawn into the debate, concerned that the ‘awesome* responsibility’ may affect Wayne Rooney’s game. What a quantity of sphericals…. United need his abil­ ity, not his leadership. Shh… but our Wayne has previous form, having been one of the infamous few sent off playing for England ­ good or bad credentials?

After the usual disastrous England World Cup foray, the British media has been full of ‘who will the country’s new captain?’ following Steven Gerrard’s retirement from interna­ tional football. No disrespect to anyone, honest wack, but Stevie G’s captaincy didn’t really do us much good in Brazil, did it now? To me the Reds captain always looks so worried about everything ­ remember that Scouse story, probably cir­ culated by an Evertonian about SG’s house being broken into while he was actually playing, and subsequently there were joke pictures circulating of him playing, displaying his permanently­worried expression with a thoughts bubble reading ‘Eh, hope nobody’s burgling my house’ …

Of course, to most mouldy oldies like me, the words ‘England’, ‘football, and ‘captain’ are enshrined in one endearing, iconic image from 1966: blond, blue­eyed Bobby Moore, the epitome of English man­ hood and footballing prowess, Any red­blooded Englishman – or woman – of a certain vintage will recall the immaculate Moore smiling and holding up the surprisingly­ small gold Jules Rimet trophy**, chaired by his valiant England team mates. Ah, now, quietly­spoken, digni­ fied Bobby really was a captain, wasn’t he? Sadly the man died far too young at the tender age of fifty­one from bowel can­ cer. Those were the days, my friend. RIP, Bobby…

So: will our Wayne cut the mustard as he leads out United and England? Does anybody care? Answers on a postcard to: I. Cudnt­give­ amunkys, Home for the Bewildered, Blank Coast, Spain. * ‘awesome ‘ apparently is American­derived (isn’t everything) and excessively over­used by the yoof of today ­ sorry, I was just quoting LVG. ** since awarded permanently to Brazil in 1970 for win­ ning it three times, replaced by the FIFA World Cup Trophy.

ANT AND MAT ARE BACK

It was seventh time unlucky for Torrevieja on Wednesday night, as they’re yet to record a win over Muro. The home side were on the back foot after just 70 seconds, as a weak toe poke from Lucas from outside the box trundled over the goal line before Oscar dived for it.

Torry were undaunted though and attacked with enterprise, and equalised in the 35th minute when Cristian played a sweet ball to Brani on the right and the gifted Croatian volleyed it into the net with exquisite skill.

Torry tore into the visitors relentlessly in the second period seeking the winner and Jorge went close from set pieces twice, with Vicente Boix (pictured) in good form as well but the goal would not come in an entertaining encounter.

Torrevieja are away to Ribarroja this Sunday before returning to the Vicente Garcia to entertain Torre Levante on Sunday September 14th.

The Murcia­based broth­ ers Anthony and Mat Ford­ Dunn are all set to go for this Sunday’s third round of the Spanish Supermoto champi­ onships at the Alabaida cir­ cuit near Alcoy. They will be hoping to get the better of their rivals over the weekend on their ‘Advance Moves International Removals’ s p o n s o r e d Supermotoland.com race bikes. Mat (pictured) leads the SM 35 Master champi­ onship whilst Anthony is only 32 points behind the champi­ onship leader in the premier SM open championship.

Friday, September 5, 2014

44

TOURETTICALLY TESTED TIM!

Goodison Goalie’s Gaffs Gift Chelsea In Nine-Goal Thriller

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting Tim Howard’s Tourette’s syndrome Costa Everton that fantastic game against Chelsea last Saturday. But the American goalkeeper is a sufferer, and his behaviour and tizzy­ tantrums almost got him sent­off, not once but twice in the pulsating match, which Everton lost 6 ­ 3.

After only 20 minutes and already 2 ­ 0 down, temperamental Tim came rushing out and clearly handled the ball a yard outside the penalty area.

Stopping a goal opportunity is a clear sending­off offence, but somehow it was fortunately missed, thanks to a(nother) myopic linesman.

Like many other so­called neutrals, I confess to having a soft spot for Everton, forever the underdogs in the great city of Liverpool. I fancied them to do well this year after finishing fifth and no­Europe last season.

The result looks like the Toffees were chewed up and spat out by hungry Chelsea, but if you saw the game you know that wasn’t the case at all. Just to score three very good goals against an excellent southern Blues team was some feat in itself – but your own defence isn’t supposed to leak six, even against the fearsome new West Londoners strike force.

Poor Tim Howard has had quite a year so far already, with hardly a break from last season’s fantastic season before he was in Brazil and playing superbly for his country. That irresistible, never­say­die USA team got to the last 16 of the World Cup only to be narrowly beaten by Belgium, and Howard hardly put a foot

John McGregor reports

wrong.

But sadly on Saturday I think the Everton stopper was at fault for three of the goals, and had that not been the case, an honourable 3 – 3 draw would have been about right. Through his legs for Diego Costa’s first, no chance with Branislav Ivanovic’s goal, but then after 2 – 0 our Tim shouldn’t have even stayed on the field.

Coleman’s own goal was then conceded from too acute an angle, any decent goalkeeper should keep those out. But immediately Tim’s tightrope­taut temper snapped as he chased and confronted the taunting Costa for a coarse jibe at Coleman, almost getting his marching orders for the second time, lucky to escape with just a booking. At that stage Everton still looked capable of pulling it back, and OK, Howard was unsighted for Matic’s sidefoot, but he could and should have done better with Ramires’ low shot for the fifth ­ finally no chance with Costa’s last. So: six conceded, one booking and lucky twice not to be sent off? You need a rest, Tim ­ before there’s more trouble…

Current key question: just how good are Chelsea? Oh yes, Diego Costa is the real deal, the Premier prize of the close season: his four in three mean he’s already on the trail of Suarez’s unbelievable achievement last season, the Brazilian Spaniard now aided by ‘Fab’regas to supply ‘em. Mourinho wasn’t happy his Blues conceded three goals, which included an Eto special, tee­hee, pity Lukaku couldn’t manage one despite a terrific game. But now, just to rub everyone else’s noses in it, Chelski snapped up Loic Remy in the final summer sales. Why didn’t anyone else? Like someone who really needed him…

Here’s one: like a Blind, rich old man blundering around in the dark being pick­pocketed of his money,

Man United are desperately buying/hiring whoever they can. £6m a year loan fee for a barely­fit Falcao?

No problem. Dutch deal for Daley Blind a snip at only £13.8m, chicken feed when you look at the crazy money United have been Angelically scattering around like confetti. Obviously (England International) Danny Welbeck’s face didn’t fit with LVB, he’s off to Giroud­ less, Senogoals Arsenal. Back on Planet Earth – well, Turf Moor ­ a sterile goalless draw against spirited newbies Burnley granted the Red Devils a measly sec­ ond point. The mega­millions must make it happen ­ and soon – or else…

Nasty neighbours and some people’s tip­for­the­top­ again Man City turned in one of those dodgy perform­ ances against Stoke their loyal supporters have come to dread over the magic years. Despite their huge value and abilities, the Blues lost 1 – 0 to a modest, hard­ working Potteries side that altogether cost less than what City paid for Sergio Aguero. City’s well­known aspirations are firmly fixed on the Champions League after two Premier titles in three seasons, but the Blue curse has struck again (fix!) and once more City are in the Group of Death, along with champions Bayern Munich, CSKA Moscow and AS Roma.

Eh lads, I fancy Swansea… or I will if the Boyos beat Chelsea next week. Three wins from three games, play­ ing lovely winning football at the expense of Man U(!), Burnley and West Brom: great – but can The Swans stay swimming serenely?

Euroqualifiers this week (yawn): on Sunday, Scotland are in Germany and Northern Ireland away to Hungary.

England (sigh) visit Switzerland on Monday, with Wales away to Andorra on Tuesday. Roll on t’weekend, and back to the big stuff…