Week 157

Edition 157

www.thecourier.es

Friday, February 21, 2014

DISGUSTING!

“Groomed” kids blackmailed over dirty pics

By ALEX TRELINSKI A 40 year old San Pedro del Pinatar man who is suspected of grooming and blackmailing children for sexual favours has been arrested by the Guardia Civil.

The alleged paedophile is said to have contacted around 500 teenagers via social networking sites on the inter­ net, and is being charged with 18 offences including the corruption of minors, as well as criminal threats and prostitution. He is set to appear before a judge in Torrevieja.

The Guardia caught up with the sus­ pect as part of Operation Mayo, after a

complaint was lodged with them in October last year about a man said to be aged around 40, who wanted to have sex with a child. The grown­up posed as a 17 year old boy to make contact with the teenager through a popular social networking site. Officers opened an investigation and then dis­ covered the suspect was using a range of different profiles on the same net­ working site, pretending to be both teenage boys and girls.

He had around 500 contacts with children across the country, with some of the chat­room conversations and pri­ vate messaging going on for quite some time. Once the suspect won over the confidence of his potential victims,

he managed to persuade them to send him some explicit images of them­ selves, blackmailing them with a threat to publish the pictures and videos if he was not given a fresh supply. When some of the youngsters discovered that the person that they were talking to was an adult, he offered them money for sex, as well as threatening them so as to keep his contacts secret.

The Guardia were able to locate a total of 11 victims aged between 13 and 17 who lived in the Alicante and Murcia provinces, as well as further afield in Malaga, Toledo, Salamanca, Huelva and Madrid. A computer and several hard drives were seized from the suspect’s home, with police sources indicating that they contained paedophile material. The detainee, with the initials FFS, will appear before the Court of Instruction No. 2 of Torrevieja.

Elsewhere, a 32 year old Alcoy man has pleaded guilty to abusing 3 girls aged between 12 and 15 at his house.

He’s been in custody for 2 years, and his plea means that a trial will not take place, with the pervert agreeing to a 15 and a half year prison sentence, after the prosecution had initially asked for 23 years behind bars on 3 counts of sexual abuse. In all the cases, the man had built up a long period of trust with the children before eventually getting them to go to his home where he forced himself upon them. All the youngsters suffered psychological traumas after the assaults.

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This week we are 3 years old.

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Friday, February 21, 2014

Are you a snapper? Do you have a great photo? Send it to design@thecourier.es and if we think it is good enough we will publish it as our Picture of the Week TELEPHONE

E­MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Calle Luis Canovas Martinez 1. Urb Aguas Nuevas, Torrevieja 03183, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 692 1003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon ­ Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Alex Trelinski CONSULTANT EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 966 921 003 679 096 309 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Patrick International Rep 5 Languages Tel 685 901 265 Donna Tel 616 332 178 Writers Donna Gee Sally Bengtsson Jeanette Erath Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Tony Mayes John McGregor

Picture of the Week

96 692 1003 679 096 309

Sky on Fire Photo by SUE JOHNSTONE. CIUDAD QUESADA

OPTIMAL RESULT Local councils got together in Torrevieja last week to work out what kind of improvements they can make across the Vega Baja to pro­ vide better services. The Optimiza project is looking to see what can be done to especially help British and other foreign residents with the Alicante Provincial Council creating a Foreign Citizen’s unit to see that all the local councils co­ordinate their activities, and that they can carry out joint projects, rather than duplicating scarce resources.

Torrevieja’s Mayor, Eduardo Dolon (pictured on the left) said it was important to offer quality servic­ es to all international residents, especially in places like his city, where more than 53% of its 107,000

One for the road A drunk driver who went down the wrong way of the RM19 on the Mar Menor for some six miles on Saturday was arrested and charged with reckless driving as well as being under the influence of alcohol.

The woman was spotted driving towards San Javier on the carriage­

inhabitants are non­Spanish. The meeting was attended by represen­ tatives of 14 councils in the Vega Baja, including Algorfa, Benijófar, Daya Nueva, Guardamar, Los Montesinos, Orihuela, Pilar de la Horadada, Rafal, Rojales, San Fulgencio, and San Miguel.

way for Murcia bound traffic, and she ignored warnings to stop from police motorcycles. She was finally intercepted after miraculously avoiding several vehicles that were travelling the right way. The driver was found to be more than three times over the drink­drive limit.

HOME LEADER

The Costa Blanca contin­ ues to lead the way in the number of new homes being sold in Spain last year, according to figures from the National Statistics Institute (INE), based on research from the Association of Property Registrars. Alicante Province saw the biggest number of new house and second sales per thousand of population, with a figure of 13.36 per thousand, followed

by Malaga Province on the Costa del Sol, with 12.57.

Alicante Province closed 2013 overall with 24,754 homes being sold, with 55% of them being new proper­ ties.

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3 men have been arrested for offering to help newly arrived tourists at Alicante­Elche airport, but who then went on to rob them. The National Police said that they started their investiga­ tions in January with a series of complaints from foreign visitors.

The gang from Algeria and Morocco, aged between 32 and 45, would in each case approach their “mark” and distract them by telling them about great deals on car hire or giving directions to Alicante. Another gang member would then steal an item from the

distracted victim. They would especially target foreign regis­ tered vehicles and hire cars for their activity.

In the first case a valuable bag was stolen; in the second instance, two rucksacks were taken and in the third case a suit­ case was lifted, with on one occa­ sion, one of the thieves actually wore a uniform from a car hire company. All of the arrested men have a previous criminal record, but despite that, they were released on bail ahead of further court proceedings.

WANTED – MORE HEADLINE NEWS! DO YOU have a story that might grab the headlines?

What’s all the gossip about round your way? A spate of robberies, perhaps – or maybe you’ve spotted a celebrity in the neighbourhood. Whether your news involves fire, police, ambulance, accidents – or hap­

pier events like family weddings (particularly Golden and Diamond ones!), Just phone the Courier office on 966 921 003 or email office@thecourier.es We’re waiting for your call…and next week’s Front Page story.

Friday Sunny High 20 Low 7° Chance of rain 0% Monday Cloudy High 19 Low 12° Chance of rain 0%

Tuesday Sunny High 19° Low 6° Chance of rain 0%

Saturday Sunny High 18° Low 7° Chance of rain 0% Wednesday Sunny High 19° Low 10° Chance of rain 0%

Sunday Sunny High 17° Low 7° Chance of rain 0% Thursday Sunny High 19° Low 11° Chance of rain 0%

Friday, February 21, 2014

Something in the air LICENSED TO LIE San Miguel’s 10­fold hikes in sewage and water charges have caused a stink for the Arcángel residents associa­ tion, who say the rise in treat­ ment charges is astronomi­ cal. The group say that 10­ fold rises in areas like the Las Filipinas Urb (pictured) are unjustified, with the fee being charged to every house, irrespective of whether they use the service or not.

Pulling their hair out

CENTRE Palms help DUMPED the world

Elche’s famous palm groves are good in fighting global warming: ­ that’s the verdict of Professor José Navarro Pedreño from the city’s University Miguel Hernández (UMH). His study has found that the Elche palm has a great capacity to store carbon from the atmosphere which helps to reduce the presence of carbon dioxide (CO2) and nitrogen gases, which is viewed as the cause of global warming.

LA REGIA BRIDGED

A direct shuttle bus link from Torrevieja to the fast AVE train service between Alicante and Madrid is to be launched along with a new joint bus­train ticket. The plan is for the bus shuttle to link up with the service at Villena sta­ tion on the A30 which has a similar journey time to that of Alicante station. The bus would use the existing Torrevieja bus facilities at the Eras de la Sal (pictured), and it’s claimed that a journey between Torrevieja and Madrid will take just over 3 hours. Work is in progress to make improvements at the Eras de la Sal for the extra services, as well as trying to reduce the amount of noise for local residents.

Better beach bar call The awarding of this year’s beach bar franchises on the Orihuela Costa could be thrown into chaos if a local businessman has his way. Raúl Fernández has filed a legal challenge to the way that the tender process has been carried out, saying that it is not a free and fair contest, with bias being shown to existing concession holders, who he claims some of whom don’t have the appro­ priate quality certification. Fernández, who has 25 years in the hospitality trade, also says that customers are given a poor deal as

SPORTING CHANCE

Skewered

The owners of 6 kebab shops in Alicante City and Murcia City are amongst a group of 10 Pakistanis who’ve been arrested for employing illegal workers in sub­standard work condi­ tions. The National Police started investiga­ tions in October, and said that many of the exploited workers were engaged for unlimited hours with no employment contract and little if any money.

he’d won their trust, he talked the women through the different stages of train­ ing. These included supply­ ing him with gold and per­ forming oral sex on him. He said that if they passed his test, they would go onto a salary of 1900 Euros a month The presiding judge described the lying copper as "pathetic", and speculat­ ed he may even have believed his own lies. “He had cheated and lied to women he had met through his partner, preying on their need for work to live out his own fantasies”, the judge said.

LINK IS JUST CAPITAL

Over 100 Costa Blanca hairdressers took to the streets of Alicante City calling for a slashing of IVA rates and action to be taken against “ille­ gal” hairdressers. Spokesman, Manuel Martinez said that the IVA rise of 13% has had a serious effect on business, with 30% of hair­ dressers in Alicante Province closing down over the last two years. He’s also criticised the rash of “illegal” hairdressers that have appeared who are charging as low as just 5 Euros for a cut, because they are not paying all the appropriate taxes.

The highly­trumpeted plans for a Microsoft Innovation Centre at Torrevieja Hospital appear to have been quietly shuf­ fled into a bin. Amidst great fanfare in 2010, the then Valencian President, Francisco Camps flew to America twice and met with Microsoft boss, Bill Gates, to apparently seal the deal for the world­leading facility to come to the area. Over four years later, the Compromis deputy Mireia Mollà has slammed the ruling Valencian PP administration for another “empty promise” with the Health Department having to admit that the Microsoft centre was “not a priority”.

A bogus spy has been branded “pathetic” by a judge after being found guilty of offering potential female recruits jobs in exchange for sex. The 54 year old local policeman from Valencia was fined 1200 Euros after pretending to be a member of the Spanish secret serv­ ice. He was also ordered to pay 242 Euros in compensa­ tion to a woman who bought a gold chain for him.

The fake agent would show his female 'trainees' military footage, electronic gadgets and weapons as a way of convinc­ ing them he was who he claimed to be. Once

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The new footbridge over the N332 at La Regia was hoisted into position on Monday night. With the main thrust of the work completed, council officials have said that the bridge should be opened for pedestri­ ans next month. The work has cost 226 thousand Euros.

Work has started on improving the oldest part of Torrevieja’s Sports City complex, with improvements to the Cecilio Gallego pavilion as well as to access roads around the area.

just one bar is given a franchise for a beach, meaning they can charge what they want in a monopoly situation.

COPS OUT

Los Montesinos has no night­time local police cover at the moment between 10.00pm and 6.00am due to 2 officers being seconded to other areas. The left­wing EU­LUT party, has slammed socialist Mayor, José Manuel Butron over the situation accusing him of refusing to pay overtime to keep the night­time cover going. The Mayor though has said that the situation is only temporary and that night­time policing will resume next month.

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Friday, February 21, 2014

POINTLESS DRIVERS NEED NEW TEST

New Spanish road laws mean that driv­ ers who have lost points from their licences and want to get them back will have to pass a test, and foreign motorists who commit offences can be chased over­ seas for their fines. Unlike in the UK where a 'clean' licence has no points and those gained are eventually 'spent' and automat­ ically removed after a certain number of years, Spanish licences start with 12 points which are deducted when driving offences are committed and to recover them, the licence­holder has to undertake a 're­education and awareness' course at a local driving school as they do not expire.

Until now, attending the course and receiving a certificate in confirmation from the driving school meant the General Directorate of Traffic (DGT) would auto­ matically replace the lost points – but with the new law, the candidate will have to go

to a DGT office, in person to take a test and will only recover their points once they have passed. .

In addition, a cross­border information­ sharing system within the EU will be adopted by Spain to allow its traffic authorities to chase fines incurred by driv­ ers from other countries, since invariably they would have been able to get away with not paying once they returned home from their holidays until now. The new traf­ fic legislation will also set the level of fines for drink­driving at 500 Euros rather than the originally­planned 1,000 Euros. A motorist driving under the influence of alcohol will only be fined 1,000 euros where he or she is found to have drunk double the legal limit, or reoffends within one year. Driving under the influence of drugs of any description will attract a fine of 1,000 euros.

TOP TROTS

Catral got the trots last Sunday with the first ever Trotada Solidaria which raised over 1 thousand kilos of items for the town’s foodbank. The first ever Trot featured around 300 par­ ticipants, some of whom run the 3 mile course, whilst others preferred a gentle Sunday stroll.

E-cig switch off

TV adverts for E­cigarettes are to be cutback under a new Consumer Protection Law. It means that ads for the ciga­ rettes cannot be broadcast on Spanish TV before the water­ shed period or in any place where people aged under 18 can see it. The tv watershed is defined as being between 4.00pm and 8.00pm during which adverts for E­cigarettes cannot be broadcast at the moment.

That will be extended further to all commercial breaks during shows aimed at the under­18s or likely to be watched by them, as well as a buffer zone of 15 minutes before or after these programmes. The news follows the introduction of new laws curtailing the use of E­cigarettes in a variety of public places.

Grave decision

Paramount latest…again!

It’s claimed that building work on the much­delayed Paramount Theme Park might start this summer, after the local Alhama de Murcia council agreed to the environmental impact document submitted by developers Premursa, as opposed to commissioning a separate environmental impact report.

Environmentalists from Ecologistas en Accion are said to be unhappy by the apparent brushing over of what they see as key issues, including the build­ ing of a substantial car park in an area which actually lies within the El Valle­Carrascoy regional park.

The opening date is still officially set for the sum­

GROUNDED

A 15 year old boy is in an induced coma in Elche General Hospital after falling through a skylight of the under­construc­ tion civic centre in the village of La Aparecida near Orihuela.

The teenager, named as Aitor, was playing with two other youngsters late on Saturday night and fell some five metres onto the ground, lost consciousness after half an hour.

Ap7 deathtraps

The AP­7 in Valencia has 8 of Spain’s most dangerous stretches of road according to the European Automobile Associates (AEA), based on figures released by the Ministry of Development in Madrid.

A lot of the blackspots are in the Northern part of the Valencia region, or close to Valencia City, though 2 bad areas have been identified close to Elche and Alicante City. The AEA has also pointed out that there are no speed traps in many of the key areas, despite signs suggesting that there are radar devices in operation.

A gang that stole large motor­bikes across the Vega Baja has been nabbed by the National Police. The 3 Algerians and 1 Spaniard in their late 20’s specialised in stealing larger motor­cycles, which they would then hide, and then sell on the internet, as well as making various alterations. All the arrests were made in Orihuela with the bikes being stolen around the area as well as in Elche, with the police not ruling out further arrests.

Daya have a doctor?

Daya Nueva residents are angry over having their local health cover cut, with patients having to travel 4 kms to Almoradi to be seen.

Their local surgery is affiliat­ ed to the one in Almoradi, and has seen the doctor can­ celling afternoon sessions an average of 2 or 3 times a month. The local Department of Health says they are aware of the problem and are looking to fix the situation.

NEW PARK

Almoradi’s Tourist Information Office has seen a big rise in visitors last year, in line with all such facilities across the area. The number of people dropping in nearly doubled from 14 thousand in 2012 to over 25 thousand last year.

MINI SHAKER WEEVIL STRIKES

The Elche and Crevillente areas were at the epicentre of an earth tremor on Monday evening at 7.31pm, with an intensity of 1.8 on the Richter scale.

No damage was reported.

els down; disposing of rubbish and dirty water appropriately; and comply­ ing with fire precautions, due to the dry nature of the area in the months of summer.

COMA BOY BIKE GANG

Almoradi up

Torrevieja’s municipal cemetery is to be expanded by near­ ly 17 thousand square metres, which will mean new burial plots will be guaranteed until 2034. Another new area is also to be created, along with a crematorium and access roads and parking.

mer of 2015, with most of the building licenses hav­ ing been granted already with the proviso that the constructors keep to a long list of rules. These include keeping noise lev­

Close to 300 palm trees, infected with the deadly red palm weevil are set for the chop next week alongside the river Segura between Alicante and Orihuela. Over 12 thousand Euros will be spent on the work, which will include replacing the palms with new trees like elm and poplar to keep the green belt going next to the river.

Pilar de la Horadada has officially opened its first natural park: ­ Las Lagunas de Lo Monte, with Mayor José Fidel Ros carrying out the ceremony at the 10.3 acre enclave. It’s hoped that the park will become a major tourist and educa­ tional attraction, with the area becoming a stopping point for animals between the Salinas of San Pedro and La Mata in Torrevieja.

Friday, February 21, 2014

007 innocent of fraud Sean Connery’s been cleared of any involvement in the Marbella property scandal which has been called the “Goldfinger” case, but his wife is still being investigated. The Marbella court said there was no evidence that the former James Bond actor had been involved in any illegal real estate dealings and dismissed all charges against him.

The long­running saga involves the illegal re­zoning of a seafront property owned by the Scottish actor to pave the way for the development of luxury apartments. Over a dozen people have since been investigated for bribery, fraud and tax crimes in the case, but the judge said 83­year­old Connery "never appears in the case taking any deci­ sions, nor does his signature appear in doc­ uments which could incriminate him". The actor's wife Micheline, however, could still face charges. In his ruling on Connery's involvement, the judge slammed the media for dubbing his investigation as the

"Goldfinger case", saying this implied that the investigation related only to the Connerys "when nothing could be further from the truth".

Fourteen Civil Guard officers have been convicted of taking bribes in exchange to turning a blind eye over illegal materials at Malaga Airport. The officers were found guilty by a jury after Malaga province's longest­ever trial, lasting just over a month, and they now face large fines and even los­ ing their jobs. A Chinese citizen was also found guilty in the case while three other Civil Guard officers were cleared of all charges. Investigations began in 2005 after claims that officers at Malaga airport were demanding money from departing passen­ gers in exchange for confiscating 'prohibited'

items, generally food. The jury saw video footage of officers searching passenger’s bags, and when banned items were found, cash was handed over by the tourists so that they could keep the forbidden booty. In some cases, travellers were told that items were banned although this was not actually the case.

In the Sierra Bernia Mountains situated behind Benidorm is the valley locally known as the Jalon Valley, although it is correctly known as Valle de Pop. However, to avoid confusion we will use the local name of Jalon Valley. At any time of year, this is a lovely drive through the stunning mountain scenery. But in the month of February, the mountains change colour as the Almond blossom covers the thousands of almond trees in the valley. Almond blossom offers many different shades from pure white to deep pink and everything in between. A real­ ly nice day out takes us past Benidorm and inland to the picturesque village of Polop. A drive through the resplendent glory of the almond covered mountainside brings us down to the village of Jalon. Which provided the local name for the valley.

A stop here to sample wines in a local bodega, a brilliant carvery lunch with wine at Pedereguer, and a seaside stop at the pretty seaside resort of Altea makes for a really enjoyable and colourful day out Then just as the blossom at Jalon starts to fade, another area breaks into blossom. We believe this is even more spectacular than Jalon In the orchards of Murcia we have an even greater range of colour. The remaining almond blossom carried over from February blends with the colours of peach, apple and pear blossoms. These bright colours con­

trasting sharply with the deep green leaves of trees and stretching for many kilometres is indeed a stunning sight. A morning visit to the light, airy city of Murcia provides for a visit to the very impressive baroque Cathedral. Cafes line the cathedral square.

Nearby the Arabic style casino building can be visited amongst other historic buildings.

In front of the town hall, fountains sparkle in the sunlight. Leaving this lovely city we move on to the unique, peaceful and very beautiful sanctuary at Calasparra. Here a cave church with a natural stone facia looks out over the surrounding valley. The sweet smell of pine trees fill the air, bushy tailed red squirrels scurry between the trees. The sparkling waters of the river Segura, unaffected at this point by the contamination of the industry found down stream flow gently below us. A tasty lunch with wine included is enjoyed at this idyllic location. Then we finish our day with a drive past the spectacular orchards with as much colour as you can imagine fill­ ing the landscape. Generally speaking this natural spectacular last for the whole month of March. Jalon runs every Friday. Calsparra will run every Thursday from 6th March.

To reserve you place on either of the above excursions simply book online at www.coachtripsonline,com or by calling David’s Caochtrips on (0034) 966785910 Jalon Valley including lunch 23€. Calasparra including lunch 24€

NAUGHTY GUARDIA

Spring colour in Spain

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Friday, February 21, 2014

editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

Shedding light on Rojales power waste I HAVE just been looking at the pic­ ture of the Lions President handing over €500 to the Mayor of Rojales to help feed homeless and needy fam­ ilies in Rojales but sometimes I won­ der whether Mayors and councils are doing enough for these unfortu­ nate people.

For example, there is a lovely sports centre in Calle Dr Quiles Mora adjacent to the Norwegian School in Quesada; at one end there are seven full­size street lights and six at the other end. These lights come on at six every evening and go off at six in the morning. The care­ taker arrives at 8am to unlock the gates to the sports centre and locks

them again at 8pm – leaving 13 lamps alight for ten hours a night, six nights a week and 12 on Sundays when the centre is closed. In total that is 792 lamp hours a week and in a short month like February, works out at 3168 lamp hours when the sports centre is locked up with no access.

It would be interesting to know the cost in euros.

While Rojales council seem to have money to burn on lighting where it is not needed, they seem to have no money for lighting where it IS needed. In September 2011 council workmen arrived at the cor­ ner of Avenida de Castilla and Calle

Dr Quiles Mora with two vehicles.They removed the lamp from the post on the corner, placed it into one of the vehicles, removed the post from the pavement and laid it against my wall in Calle Dr Quiles Mora. They then rolled out a 50mm copper cable from the removed post on Avenida de Castilla to the nearest lamppost in Calle Dr Quiles Mora, taped up the loose wires on the pavement, erected blue barriers around the wires and along the length of cable on the footpath.

It was left like that until in November 2012, over a year later.

Then along come the men and vehicles to erect a new post, roll up

the cable and place it in a vehicle.

They stacked up all the barriers on the pavement against my wall and disappeared without putting a lamp on the post (well, it had started to drizzle).

Several times I reported the details to Rojales town hall and also to the Municipal centre in Quesada, saying I was fed up with people using the barriers as ladders to access my property to retrieve their footballs.

In August 2013 they took the bar­ riers away but still no lamp arrived. It is now 2014 and still no lamp, mak­ ing it three winters without light on a very busy junction with cars parked on both sides of the one­way Avenida De Castilla as far as the junction with Calle Dr Quiles Mora.

Traffic travelling in a west­ erly direction along Avenida De Castilla must turn left at the “no entry” sign into Calle Dr Quiles Mora, again with cars parked both sides.. It is a two­way road with pupils arriving and leaving during the hours of darkness with lit­ tle light. Making their way Will he also take away the vote from women? between parked cars makes They, too, had to fight hard to get what they wanted this junction quite dangerous.

J BILLET, Quesada from the ruling classes. Will he advocate taking an army and navy formed of pressed men to take back Ireland the commonwealth and even part of France, for example?

Let’s reintroduce public floggings for all those heretics who are Trades Union members! Put chil­ dren back to working 12 hour days in mills and pits (sorry, the Tories got rid of them).

Like it or not, if it hadn’t been for the Trades Union movement and a few enlight­ MARIA and the Pink ened reformers, most of us would not be Ladies/AECC’s answer to owning and living in our own houses here in my letter in last week’s Spain, or England for that matter. It is only Courier states “There is no through the Trades Unions that working age limit on smear tests”. conditions have been improved.

This statement is com­ Examples include; shorter working pletely contradictory since day/week, Holidays, safer working condi­ the email I received from tions, improved health and social services the Pink Ladies after my better pay (for some). request for a smear test Unfortunately, there are still many stated, “You must be 45 Bosses who embrace the principles of Mr unless you have family Mayes and even exploit their employees members with cancer. I am illegally. Why, if managers know what is unable to book an appoint­ best, did we have to introduce a mini­ ment.’’ mum wage?

My findings about how I worked as a HR Manager for some major com­ this organisation operates panies and can tell you if it wasn’t for Trades shows quite categorically Unions, things would be a lot worse for the majority refusal on the of the working population. Over the years the their Unions have agreed and co­operated with massive grounds of age. No one job losses. In my experience, they tend to resist from that organisation has when managers, who, Mr Mayes contends, have explained to date why I the right to decide what happens, make bad or was refused this test, other unjustified decisions or act in contradiction of than on an age principle.

It seems to me that Maria agreed negotiating procedures.

The companies I worked for are generally good is very good at propaganda employers. Yet I still fear that without the Unions, (isn’t this what politicians they would not necessarily be. I often worked in do whilst never actually partnership with the Unions to introduce and affect answering the question change. It would surprise you that time and again, posed?) since the first six they had some very positive suggestions. paragraphs of her reply Don’t deny people their democratic rights. Such purely spout what the radical ‘ranting’ could put us back on the same slip­ organisation does (free pery slope that Europe fell into in the 1930’s. Read advertising again) with no your history Mr Mayes and don’t let the bad be backup for those in need of repeated. help.

PS You still produce a great paper!

CONCERNED MUM OF 2, DAVID DAWSON, El Raso.

Crevillente

LOST IN A MAYES OF MISINFORMATION I READ with interest the reader’s letter entitled ‘Only fools and curses’ (Edition 156). I always find Mr Mayes’ column amusing. He enjoys being provocative and not necessarily accurate.

It is like reading the Daily Mail. Right wing, racist, bigoted and often misinformed (except for the date printed on top of the page).

Normally I would not give the likes of Mr Mayes the time it takes to reply to his opinions. However, his latest tirade against the rights of workers to strike is appalling. Hitler and Stalin both had similar views but look carefully at history before making such comments in public.

Yes, the Luddites attacked the introduc­ tion of automation/new technology. But consider why.

In the days that Mr Mayes craves for, Britain was ruled by the aristocracy. The landowners had all of the wealth. The peas­ ants were kept in place by denying them an education and paying them a pittance so that they would be grateful for what little they had.

They would remain subservient or be subject to punitive punishments. After all, if you were to educate the workers, they could realise how easily they were being exploited and that would never do!

With the advent of the industrial revolution we had the introduction of a new source of wealth (for the minority). The land workers were drawn to the towns to work in factories and mills in the hope of improving their standards of living. Again, they were kept down by the owners. Conditions were hard and unsafe. Hours were long and pay was poor. Living conditions were overcrowded and squalid; arguably, worse than before. Again any protestation was met with severe reprisal and cast­ ing whole families out of their homes. Read Dickens if you need some fictional illustrations of living conditions.

In the 19th century, workers were beginning to organise themselves. The ruling class even used

Letters and emails l will only be con­ sidered for publica­ tion if an address and

lethal force to suppress workers who began to protest for better working conditions. By the turn of the 20th century Trades Unions had come into existence and the Labour Party was in its formative years with 40 MPs. However, the country was still ruled by Liberals and Tories, the parties of the aris­ tocratic rich!

In London at the turn of the century (the time my grandfather was born) 30.7% of the population were living below the poverty line. In York, 28% were living on a diet less generous than the

diet of the workhouse. Yes, the workhouse! The unions and Labour party were the only hope for the working poor.

In 1911­12 the ruling classes reacted with ‘furi­ ous incomprehension’ when workers withdrew their labour as a protest. In Liverpool, troops were deployed to fire over the heads of strikers.

It seems to me that Mr Myers would have those days back in a jiff. Heck, we don’t want those ‘thick skulled’ unions and workers trying to protect their living standards just as the divide between the rich (and super rich) grows ever wider.

If the working poor didn’t fight for their rights, I fear that people like Mr Mayes would quickly have them put back into subservient poverty and per­ haps bring back the workhouse.

contact number are provided to confirm the authenticity of the writer.

The Courier man­ lagement does not

necessarily agree with the views expressed.

Maria’s the queen of propaganda

7

Friday, February 21, 2014

LIKE most Librans, my indecision is usually final.

And I still haven’t got to the bottom of my latest problem ­ chronic constipation.

After another weekend straining session, I decided on Sunday evening to call an abrupt halt to my Cambridge 800 weight­loss programme – then changed my mind almost immediately. Well, sort of.

Sitting on the fence took some doing considering that several days’ personal basura was bursting to be jettisoned from my suffering stern.

Ultimately, I took the advice of the Courier's med­ ical guru Dr Machi Mannu and on Tuesday, put the Cambridge Plan officially on hold for a week.

It actually took 48 hours for my latest intestinal blockade to be lifted and the over­ loaded cargo despatched.

But my internal workings are at least back to normal, which is a great relief in every sense.

My biggest worry in contin­ uing the Cambridge way is that, as an angina sufferer, another blockage could trig­ ger a coronary crisis. I say that from the heart of my bot­ tom (so sorry, the bottom of my heart).

A retired nurse also told me this week that the effect

TORN BETWEEN TWO STOOLS...

Do I pack in Cambridge diet - or risk new pile-up of Carry on Constipation?

of my daily medication could be considerably reduced by the consumption of large vol­ umes of water, as recom­ mended by the Cambridge dieticians.

I had the powerful incen­ tive on my diet last year of raising money for my sick granddaughter. But the unlikely menu worked – and it certainly didn't cost me 30­ odd euros each week for official products.

Sadly, I ballooned again during the second half of the year, so I imagined my 2014 schedule would be a simple repeat of the 2014 pro­ gramme.

What I needed was moti­ vation from the right source, which is where the Cambridge 800 Plan came in.

My initial enthusiasm for their meal­replacement prod­ ucts was quickly tempered by their devastating impact on my system.

In fact, I have never been more impacted in my life.

By Week Two, I was suf­ fering severe constipation, brought on by my failure to see off at least 2.5 litres of water every day.

For some people, swallow­ ing gallons of H2O is a dod­ dle. For me, it has been the single most difficult part of any diet I have ever tried.

However, I did manage to

The Weight Escape, week 3

gulp down perhaps 1.5 litres every 24 hours. That had dwindled to around one litre by the time I was hit by a girth­quake that was incredi­ bly hard to stomach.

a gut feeling that my bloated belly was about to burst.

The problem eased after I THREE weeks into my called my Cambridge con­ Cambridge 800 war on sultant Debi Winston, who weight, I’ve managed to told me to start drinking like a lose 2.5 kilos ­ that’s fish. around 5.5lbs in more “The more you drink, the familiar language. better,'' she assured Grumpy Cambridge consultant Old Piranha. “It will loosen Debi Winston weighed up in an hour or two and the me in on Tuesday at a problem should clear. still bulky 85.9 kilos ­ “You must drink loads – which may well be an it is very important.'' inflated figure in view of For the next few days, I my constipation crisis downed an ocean of liquid at the time. from a half­litre beer tankard.

Equally encouraging, Water, tea, coffee, juices – my vital statistics are just about everything non­ universally lower ­ with alcoholic went down the fully 10cm off my bust hatch. in just three weeks.

Yet by last weekend, my engine had cut out again.

Constipation had struck.

That's why I may well cast It arrived on Friday the Cambridge 800 adrift in evening two weeks ago as I the 2014 Bloat Race. settled down to relax. I spent First, however, we need to the entire night both on my establish whether there's a own and on my throne ­ with hole in the bottom..

Cat-throat crisis is beyond a choke A WEEK of furrying (sorry, fer­ rying) sick cats between Casa Donna and the local vet has left me a whisker away from cutting someone's throat.

I know black cats are sup­ posed to be lucky, but a mystery bug turned the recent health of my four beauties into a real cat­ and­louse affair.

Twin terrors Tom and Dick both went down with what I can only describe as the ‘purr­gy lurgy’. The symptoms even

mystified vet Julian at the Lagomar clinic in El Raso.

The problems began with a cough and within 12 hours or so it was Tom, Dick and worry as they sat there lethargically, eyes weeping and racked with dis­ torted grimaces and spasms of coughing and retching.

I feared the brothers had picked up a potentially fatal infection from one of the local ferals who cheekily push through the back­door cat­flap

and nick everything in the utility room apart from the washing machine.

However, a blend of steroids and antibiotics restored them to their mischievous selves within two days, unlike their frail little brother Harry, who has feline leukaemia and is now in the care of a knowledgeable friend.

My third dark resident, Molly – inherited from a neighbour who moved back to the UK – seems to have avoided the bug, which

would undoubtedly affect her more than the nine­month old Fat Boys. In human terms, roly­ poly Molly ''has learning difficul­ ties.'' But I don’t think she’s intelligent enough for that.

Anyway, it was black to the future as I left Julian's surgery last Friday with Tom cleared of further treatment. “That's a relief,'' I thought. “After so many morning visits to the vet, I can actually catch up on my sleep.''

Minutes later, I was back at

Julian's with my tame black feral Webby, who I had found huddled in a corner of the gar­ den, clearly in distress. I'd not seen him for a couple of days, but since he has lived outside all his short life, I was not too bothered. But when I saw him curled up in the garden, semi­ conscious, his eyes watering and nose full of mucus, I

Continued on Page 11

8

Friday, February 21, 2014

Friday, February 21, 2014

9

10

Friday, February 21, 2014

JUST CALL ME SPIDERMAN

WHEN out driving I take special care not to disturb the spider that has made its home behind my wing mirror.

All credit to the little fel­ low's building expertise. Its web endures no matter how clunky the car trip nor how fierce the air slipstream as my vehicle negotiates the highways, either chauffeur­ ing Mrs S on her frequent shopping expeditions or my grandchildren, equally regu­ larly, to and from school.

But to further ensure the spider's safety, I am consid­ ering designing it a tiny crash helmet. And if the creature happens to be image­con­ scious, I might even consider asking my daughter to cro­ chet four pairs of biker bootees to go with the teeny guy's head protector.

Yes, I know, I know. I should get a life and stop being so damned silly. But I happen to like spiders. Mrs S, on the other hand, prefers camels. However, I digress.

Er, so what was I saying?

Oh, yes, my daughter is a

crocheting dynamo. She honed her craft when she left home to go to university some years ago and between study sessions took up the hook as a hobby.

Nowadays, she lives only a few minutes down the road which is convenient because I reckon my spider would need several fittings for its four pairs of crocheted bootees. Whoops, there I go again. I've got to halt these bizarre fantasies.

'For goodness sake, Dave, is there any point to this crazy story apart from the one on the crochet hook?' queried Dave the barman

the other evening.

'Your trouble, Dave,' I told Dave, 'is that you have not an ounce of sensitivity in your soul. Your whole raison d'etre is to make money behind that bar.'

'Not from you lot I don't,' retorted Dave bitterly as he surveyed my fellow members of the pub discussion group who were clustered at the counter scrabbling to raise the cost of a round from their meagre piles of pocket

shrapnel.

And then a surprising thing happened. Dave the bar­ man's eyes filled with tears and he started to weep loud­ ly. The pub's stunned clien­ tele stopped separating their coins from their buttons and tap washers and gathered at the bar to comfort mein host.

Even Fag Ash Bill, who rarely entered the inn because he much preferred to stay outside smoking, stamped out his cigarette on the pavement and hurried inside to identify the source of the sobbing.

'What on earth is the matter, old

friend and diluter of our beer?' I asked Dave the bar­ man, holding out a bar towel for him to blow his nose on.

'It's YOU, Dave Silver!' he snapped between sobs.

'How dare you suggest that I sustain no softheartedness?

I'll have you know that I have tenderness, romance and warmth in abundance. Or at least I DID have until I took on this pub and had my emo­ tions blunted by you collec­ tion of human wrecks.'

Daft Barry, pretty dim at gauging situations but bril­ liant in the art (?) of deliver­ ing non sequiturs, announced: 'My mother loves to cook for me. She serves my meals with gusto, although I much prefer Bisto.'

We all turned to stare at Daft Barry. Even Dave the barman halted his weeping and looked mystified. As for Fag Ash Bill, he simply gave up trying to figure out what was going on and fled the premises to fire up a much­ needed fag.

Indoor Lou, the sanest member of our group, shook

his head determinedly and vowed that he would never again visit the pub while Daft Barry, Ol' Red Eyes, Silly Dave Silver and the rest of the mob were propping up the bar nor while Fag Ash Bill was outside propping up a lamp post.

'You're all crazy!' shouted Indoor Lou and he stormed out. Seconds later he came limping back in. 'I stepped on one of Fag Ash Bill's suppos­ edly­extinguished cigarette ends which was still smoul­ dering on the pavement. The soles of my shoes are so thin that I've burned my foot. Any chance of you driving me home, Saintly Dave Silver?'

'Ah, so I've gone from silly to saintly, have I? But of course I'll give you a lift, Lou,' I said. 'First though I thought I'd stop off at my daughter's to sort out some crocheted bootees.'

'Oh, that's really kind of you but it won't be neces­ sary,' said Indoor Lou, mas­ saging his foot. 'I'm sure I've got a spare pair of shoes at home.'

11

Friday, February 21, 2014

From Page 7 realised we had a bit of an epidemic..

Julian opted for the same antidote of antibiotics over three days, which kyboshed my hopes of a lie­in for the next couple of mornings.

Webby also turned out to be an unusual little boy.

He was a girl!

OK, my mistake – but I almost got it right. I've also changed her name to Feraldine in view of her background. Much more original than her old mon­ icker, don’t you think?

The name Webby was my bizarre interpretation of the fact she was born with Wun White Whisker (WWW = World Wide Web). People keep telling me 'One' is not spelt 'Wun' ­ but why let the facts spoil a good Wurd Game?

As I write this, Feraldine is recuperating on a cosy towel in my shower room.

But, four days after I found her in distress, she is still not eating and con­ tinues to emit chesty noises with every intake of breath.

I'll be back at the vet's first thing in the morning.

But will Ms Webby­ Feraldine be OK? Time will tell ­ but the cat­ throat atmosphere among my other moggies is beyond a choke.

12

Friday, February 21, 2014

KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON When working with a dog, the most important factor is to not give up on them. I get some E­mails from people, saying that they now dislike their dog because they will not behave.

Some just end up leaving the dog to their own devices, because they are fed up and frustrated. It may seem obvious to point out, but if some people take this attitude, then the dog will never make any progress and will pick up extremely negative energies from you, which will only snowball the prob­ lems. A dog is well aware if you no longer want anything to do with them and when I get E­mails along these lines, there is very little I can do, until the human changes their own attitude.

I called my business, “The Dog You Need”, because you don’t get the dog you want, you get the dog you need. You get the right dog you need, who will help you evolve as a person. Dogs will always feed off of whatever energy it is you are portraying around them.

For me, that used to be frustrated, angry, nervous and anxious energy, which is the worst combination possible. Billy, my German Shepherd, picked up on this many years ago and his behaviour went from pos­ itive to negative very quickly.

That is until my wife, Jean, explained to me that until my behaviour changes, Billy will keep up the aggressive patterns he was showing towards other dogs and she was

DOGS NEVER GIVE UP ON US, SO WE SHOULDN'T GIVE UP ON THEM

absolutely right! I started to really look into the subject of calm and how it is best achieved and I started doing regular medita­ tions which have turned my life and Billy’s life around. No longer am I projecting those negative energies and Billy, along with my other six dogs are a pleasure to be around.

But you must remember, you cannot just wake up one day and say, “Right, from today onwards, I am going to start to become calm”. That won’t work. Calm is something you need to nurture inside of you each day, just as you may practice a particular sport,

or hobby. For some reason the calm part, is what my clients find the most difficult to fol­ low.

Why? Well it puzzles me, as I am asking them to relax and switch their minds off, which will make them a lot calmer around their dogs, but many fail to do that. Maybe the answer is a lack of discipline, because to change for the better, takes discipline. That is possibly the only answer that springs to mind.

So when people say to me they have given up on their dog, that to me means that

they have given up on themselves. Because when I ask them if they followed the calming techniques I asked them to do, 99% of the time the answer is no. I do not have a magic wand and believe it or not many people expect that of me, but to change a dog’s behaviour takes discipline on the human’s part. When people throw the towel in on their dog, that is the worst possible energy you can send to them. We know very well what happens when we feel loved and wanted ­ we blossom and that is no different for a dog.

I am available for consultations through­ out the Costa Blanca region, if you are hav­ ing problems with your furry best friend. To book a consultation you can E­mail me at peter@thedogyouneed.com and I will con­ tact you straight away, or you can call me on 966 847 827.

We have set up an animal charity, where we help the most severely abused and injured animals in Spain. If you would be kind enough to donate anything to this spe­ cial cause you can do by PayPal, where the account details are peter@thedogyouneed.com or to our Nat West charity account, where the sort code is 60­16­03 and the account number is 73754900. IBAN: GB83 NWBK 6016 0373 7549 00. BIC: NWBK GB 2L Even one Euro will help, so please, please, try and support us. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

PETS’ CORNER: CAN YOU TAKE IN A HOMELESS DOG OR CAT? Please help Perla – she has nowhere to go Perla is desperate to find a new home, originally handed to us as no longer wan­ ted, it soon became clear that she had been ill treated sometime in her past. We found that her tail had been broken this will have caused her a lot of pain. She has now had her tail removed.

She has also been suffering with an inflamed ear drum.

This has also been treated.

She needs a special person that will have time to spend with her, and help her to get over her past experiences.

She has been receiving tre­ atment whilst in the hospital, and has reacted very well She has since been in a fos­ ter home, this was only tem­ porary and her time to leave is getting closer. If you would like to meet Perla in her fos­ ter home please ring and we will organize a visit.

She is three years old and has such a sweet face and a lovely nature.

She has been spayed and had all injections. Please call 616655789 www.catsndogsaid.com

DYLAN originally came into the kennels with his brother when he was around 10 weeks old; he was adopted after being with us for 8 months and has been in the same home since. Sadly, his owner has died. He is a 4 year old Greyhound cross who is fully vaccinated, micro chipped and castrated. Dylan is a big, friendly boy who loves to play with his kennel mates but we have been told he doesn´t like cats. Call 966710047 or email info@satanimalrescue.com

Dylan NACHO was found wande­ ring by the side of a road. He is an 8 week old German Shepherd cross who is like all puppies, bouncy, playful and full of fun. He will have the relevant vaccinations before he leaves the ken­ nels. Please contact us on 966710047 or email info@satanimalrescue.com

Nacho

Skippy is a young 8 month old male dog , obviously a mixed breed. He is a very friendly lively young man who just loves life. Skippy is very friendly and loves peo­ ple and other dogs, and is fine with cats. Please con­ tact K9 or PHONE 600 84 54 20 for more info www.k9club.es

Kingsley and his brother Tyler were found wandering as starving, frightened pup­ pies. Since being in the APAH kennels they have put on weight and grown in con­

Molly is a 12 week old Podenco that has been found in the campo along with her siblings, she is ado­ rable very quick to learn and her foster carer says she is very good, their mum is a small Podenco. Molly is still a bit nervous and needs a good home for more info call 650 304 746 or Email: p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail .com

Teddy is a large Mastin cross dog that was found wandering. He is good with other dogs and he is very friendly, he is only about 3 years old and he is looking for a new home. For more information on this lovely boy please telephone the P.E.P.A. helpline on 650 304 746 or email p.e.p.a.animal­ charity@gmail.com

Kingsley

Skippy Nemo is around 1 year old and his owners no longer want him as they are retur­ ning to Russia so we have taken him in. He is a lovely little boy, good with other dogs, cats and children.

Call: 645 469 253. www.pet­ sinspain.com

fidence and are ready for the first loving home and family.

To meet them please contact Yvonne on 630 422 563.

Heidi is one of many of the black cats living in the APAH Cattery. For some reason, beautiful black cats are always overlooked. Can you offer Heidi or any of the other 80+ cats and kittens in the APAH Cattery a loving home? Please contact Yvonne on 630 422 563.

Nemo Romeo is a Chihuahua cross and was living on the streets for 2 weeks before managing to rescue him. His age is around 2 years and is very good with other dogs and cats. Call: 645 469 253. www.petsinspain.com

Heidi

Molly

Teddy

Friday, February 21, 2014

13

Sarah's Curtain & Bedding Store made to measure just for you!!!

In addition to their super readymade col­ lections, Sarah's Curtain & Bedding Store are now pleased to be able to offer a fantastic new curtain and home textile making up service. With fantastic fabrics in a wide range of colours and styles.... there is something to suit every room.

Soon we will be spending more time out­ side so why not have your outdoor cush­ ion pads, sun beds, pergolas or swing chairs recovered? With a great choice in durable fabrics, Sarah's Curtain & Bedding store continues to be your first call for all textile refurbishments. All

work is carried out in the fully legal and insured sewing area of the store.

It is definitely worth visiting this friendly store to see the new home textile ranges just arrived direct from UK and Spanish manufacturers for Spring and Summer 2014. With stunning printed duvet sets, fantastic quality curtains and voile pan­ els in a rainbow of colours you just can't find a better choice anywhere else.

This busy and popular, independent fam­ ily run store stocks only the best quality and most up to date ranges in home tex­ tiles. As recognised stockists of CL

kitchen textiles, duvets, pillows, cushion covers, throws and much much more!

For a great choice in amazing home textiles at extremely reasonable prices, call into the store you won't be disappoint­ ed! Sarah and her team look forward to seeing you! Don't forget, Sarah's Curtain & Bedding Store is an independent shop and is located within CC Los Dolses, Urb Villamartin, next to the card shop near the canal.

Home, Sundour, Rectella and Ashley Wilde..... to name just a few.... you can­ not beat Sarah's Curtain & Bedding Store for choice and value for money.

Having just one store, located in CC Los Dolses, Urb Villamartin, Sarah ensures only the best qual­ ity products grace the shelves, to maintain an excellent customer service, she orders all textiles her­ self and is able to boast the most current and in trend styles. As well as curtains and bedding, there are Egyptian cotton towels,

14

As I manage to pick up more work, my life is becoming one long whirl of planning, writing and teaching and it´s easy to lose track of things that are important.

As I have to arrange everything at home, and try and keep on top of the housework as well as look­ ing after my son, life can have a tendency to revert to my mundane memories of living back in Britain. We all need money and those of us not old enough to retire have to work, therefore of course there are times when we need to be in work mode, but I’ve come to realise that work mode is becoming more and more frequent. I use the week­ ends to write my Courier articles and try and get them sent off in time, although come Monday and Tuesday, although they are written, I have no time to E­mail them off to the paper and it has been known to be Wednesday before they are sent.

Last Sunday I was plan­ ning to go to Alicante to see a friend, therefore I knew I only really had Saturday to write this article and as my

Friday, February 21, 2014

AVOIDING THE BRITISH GRIND

son was going to a party where I could leave him, I thought this would be the ideal time to catch up with writing and a bit of house­ work. Not too surprisingly, my plans changed with me

deciding that I had time for a quick coffee with my friend, and after dropping off my boy, I phoned her to see if she was free. She told me she was going to Guardamar and that I

should join her there for a couple of hours, but I was reluctant to go, knowing the limited writing time I had as well as having lessons to plan. My friend however was tenacious and would

not take no for an answer and so I found myself head­ ing towards her house and off we went to the beach for a coffee in the sun.

It was nice to get out, sit by the port and relax, not thinking about work and apart from keeping one eye on the time, I didn´t have to occupy my mind with any­ thing other than chatting and passing time with friends. We took it easy, breathing in the intoxicating fresh sea air without a care in the world. The conversa­ tion covered a variety of subjects but those topics were less important than the simple act of just being there. For that short time on a Saturday afternoon, I was taken away from work, and I actually managed to switch off from thinking about the week ahead and the numer­ ous papers that I had to pre­

pare and instead I enjoyed good company with a free mind and a laid back atti­ tude. I think I had begun to forget why I came to Spain and the life that I came here for. Of course I have to work and I will still do long hours but I will also be sure to enjoy my free time and make the most of it. I know that during the summer I will have a bit more time to spare and so I need to work as much as possible at the moment. I am also aware that I came to Spain to escape not only the British weather but also the daily grind, the long commute, the grey skies and air thick with smog and fumes. This is a fantastic place to live and I intend to remind myself whenever I can, why I came here and I am thank­ ful for my friends who some­ times need to take me in hand and make me remem­ ber. I later managed to spend an enjoyable after­ noon in Alicante on Sunday knowing that there is always time to prepare and take classes and that life is for living, the important thing to remember is that balance is the key to a fulfilling and enjoyable life.

Friday, February 21, 2014

15

KICKED IN THE TROSSACHS

Alex Salmond’s sporran must be whirling around like a helicopter propeller after a terrible few days for Scotland’s First Minister.

There’s more chance of the UK winning May’s Eurovision Song Contest than the Scots voting for independence this autumn after a series of rebuffs that sees the Yes campaign becalmed somewhere in the Trossachs. It’s as if the sepa­ ratists just haven’t thought through some absolute fun­ damentals with a series of setbacks that would have had many of them reaching for their whisky bottles.

The affable Salmond who is a canny operator, seems to have made some bad assumptions that have come back to bite him on the back of his kilt. The first caber to be tossed at him is over a future Scottish currency. The SNP have said that they would continue to share the

pound, but a big no has come back on that one from London. Not just the expect­ ed rebuff from Chancellor George Osborne, but also from the Bank of England boss, Mark Carney. No deal say both men, and why should Scotland expect to share anyway? Surely if Scotland votes for independ­ ence, then they will have to set up their own currency and not cherry pick some of the best bits from south of the border? Salmond can’t have it both ways, and you would have thought he’d want his own money that he could control, rather than the mandarins of Whitehall still pulling the strings?

Salmond has told his fel­

low countrymen and women that a new look Scotland would take its place as part of the European Union, but now that door seems to have been slammed in his face. A haggis­shaped hand grenade has been thrown at the First Minister by the European Commission chief, Jose Manuel Barroso, who said that an independent Scotland would have to apply for EU membership and that it would have to get the approval of all of the other member states. Barroso quoted the example of Spain vetoing Kosovo joining the EU, but I suspect the bigger concern is a possible inde­ pendent Catalan region rip­ ping away its umbilical cord

from Madrid. So it’s no go blame, whilst frankly the First Barroso, and the anti­sepa­ Minister should ratist campaigners are rub­ be looking a lot bing their hands in glee, closer to as the Tam home.

O’Shanter of independence lies some­ where in a Scottish city cen­ tre gutter. The sensible pragmatic Scottish voters know exactly which side their shortbread is but­ tered on, and come Thursday September 18th, I can’t wait to hear Alex Salmond’s excuses for a big defeat. I’ll bet you anything that those nasty Sassenachs in London get all the

16

Friday, February 21, 2014

Tony

Mayes

HE ALWAYS HAS SOMETHING TO SHOUT ABOUT

GLOBAL WARMING DENIERS LOOK DAFT

IT'S my guess that it will be possible to cruise to the North Pole this summer. We've been hearing, day after day, of the dreadful winter storms which have hit Britain and Ireland with unceasing regularity, causing floods, coastal erosion and widespread damage.

But what we haven't heard in the press as yet (and you've read it first in the Courier in a world­wide exclusive) that the storms have also had a dramatic effect in the polar ice in the Arctic. What has happened is that the giant waves have driven warmer seas north eastwards right around the coast of Norway and under the polar ice in the Baring Sea, melt­ ing wide tracks of sea ice prematurely. Instead of there being almost 14 million square kilometres of sea ice in the north, which is the 30­year average, there is currently only 12.6 million square km, a loss of 1.2 million, which is a huge area which should be iced over.

Sea ice should build up until the beginning of March, but instead, this year, the amount of sea ice actually contracted last week, and this is unprecedented. But just as important­ ly, the dramatic melting has pushed open water to within about 700 miles of the Pole, which in "normal" times does not happen until mid­summer. It's given the summer ice melt this year a real head start and we could see boats able to get right to the North Pole and a new, dramatic cruise ship destination.

If this doesn't show up global warming and climate change to a sceptic population I don't know what will.

Climate change is real and it's going to get worse. At pres­ ent sea temperatures around the tropics are above 30 degrees Celsius ­ compare that with temperatures of below ­30 degrees C at the pole and around ­50 in Siberia and you have some idea of the vast temperature contrast. Air rises in the heat around the tropics and colder air rushes in to fill the gap, hence movement of air from tropics to pole. Add in the earth's spin and you have winds moving west to east, and hence the jet stream. The greater the temperature con­ trast, the greater the speeds. And high jet stream winds whip up Atlantic storms into giant storms with hurricane force winds. And as sea temperatures continue to rise thanks to continued global warming, extreme weather will only get worse.

THREE totally different stories in the UK press caught my eye last week. The first was yet another death of a baby, mauled by a ferocious dog. The second was the deci­ sion by MPs to ban smoking in cars which also contain young children. The third was a father beating his son to death with a cricket bat. Let's add other stories which are often in the press ­ children going to primary school still in nappies not having been potty trained; children having to be fed by teachers because they have been sent to school without breakfast, or those parents who prefer to go to the pub and leave their children in a house unattended. There's

q

a common theme which connects all of these reports ­ the fact that there are appalling adults who are simply not fit for purpose as parents. Firstly, what sort of parent has an American pit bull type dog in a house with a young baby?

Last year I wrote in my column: "how many more deaths and serious injuries are there going to be caused by dogs before action is taken?" My view is there should be a law banning parents who have children under four owning dogs over a certain size. It is far more important than banning smoking in cars, as the deaths of children have shown.

However, what parent who has the best interests of his or her child at heart wants to damage the child by smoking?

What parent who is having a war with an estranged partner takes it out on the child to such an extent he goes to a crick­ et pitch where his child is playing and beats him to death with a bat in front of the mother? He's obviously deranged, but wouldn't tests have picked up some mental instability years before? What kind of parent thinks more of himself or herself that they can spend their money on drink, drugs and or fags and not feed and clothe their children properly, or have such a disinterest in their child's welfare they can't even be bothered to potty train him or her? These days, people have to take exams and tests for just about every­ thing ­ everything, that is except the most important thing they can do, which is to create the next generation. The most ignorant, irresponsible buffoon can breed and bring to the world a child in danger of neglect, ill­treatment and struggling to compete in an ever more challenging world.

What I would like to see is a major discussion on how to raise standards in society and a serious attempt to stop the worst elements of society from creating the next generation.

Of course, the ideal would be to prevent people from having children until they proved themselves ready to become par­ ents and also that they were not going to pass on horrible genetic diseases. In other words, control breeding. It’s still a long way off, but I'm convinced that it will happen, not in my lifetime, but probably within my children's lifetimes and certainly in my grandchildren's lifetimes. And I would have liked to be part of that new humanity, because I am sick and tired of damage needlessly being done to babies and chil­ dren.

Bear all that in mind and now consider another story in the UK press. A survey of 18 to 30­year­olds revealed that one in five would have sex with someone they knew had a sexually transmitted disease. In other words 20 per cent are that irresponsible and stupid ­ yet each and every one of them could easily become parents. These crazy people say they would prefer to have a night of passion even though they knew they had a STD ­ and deal with the conse­ quences later. A fair percentage said they would have sex even without a condom ­ and with an attitude like that it's no wonder that the spread of HIV and AIDS happened with such speed. It brings me back to my argument that there are far too many irresponsible people not fit to be parents.

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SOMETIMES news stories make me proud to be British ­ and here's one of them. Bank of England gov­ ernor Mark Carney, in his quarterly inflation report, has raised UK growth forecasts for the economy from 2.8% to 3.4% for this year. The upbeat assessment of the UK econo­ my puts the pound on a pedestal in the markets. Growth will be much higher than in the Eurozone and in the US and Carney now predicts UK interest rates will begin to rise in the spring of next year, faster than the rest ­ good news for savers and ex­pats living on pensions and savings here. What the news means is that everything the Coalition government has done in getting Britain on the right track for recovery has been proved right. So everyone who voted for the Coalition parties as the last election can pat themselves on the back and be justifiably proud. The Coalition stood firm against all the pon­ tifications from Ed Balls who wanted Britain to spend itself out of recession, with all the damage that could have done. What concerns and baffles me is that some UK opinion polls still put Labour ahead. It's amazing how quickly people forget that Britain got into a terrible financial mess under Labour ­ how could people believe Britain's future finances would be safe under Labour?

JEREMY Clarkson is very well known for jumping into things and putting both feet well in, and he did just that when he rubbished the furore over the loss of 25 million per­ sonal bank details held on two computer discs. He claimed the story was a fuss about nothing, and he published his own Barclays account number and bank sort code in a newspaper article claiming all people could do with the information was to put money into his account, not take money from it. But he was proved very wrong, when someone used the details to set up a £500 direct debit to benefit a charity. He said: "The bank cannot find out who did this because of the Data Protection Act and they cannot stop it from happening again.

I was wrong and I have been punished for my mistake." But this is extremely worrying, because on every cheque you write are your account and sort code details. So is it equally possi­ ble to use these to establish any direct debit on any UK bank?

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IT'S long been the British belief that the average American has no knowledge of anything that happens outside the US, and scant knowledge of anything else other than in his own backyard.

Well, it looks as if that view has quite a bit of truth, after it was revealed that in a survey of 2,200 Americans, one in four didn't know the Earth revolved around the Sun. Amazing or what?

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REMEMBER three weeks ago I commented on a 41 year old Ohio mother, Sheila Ranea Crabtree, who so disliked her first name she wanted it changed. She appeared before a judge and asked if she could in future be called Sexy. And the judge has agreed. Would you like people to call you Sexy? It's easier in the UK, just change it by deed poll and we all could be Sexy (or Sexier!)

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Friday, February 21, 2014

SAY IT IN SPANISH Learn the lingo - with a little help from JEANETTE ERATH Spanish 110

One way to think about relative pronouns is to recognise that they combine two sentences that share a common noun.

Hi and welcome back to more Spanish with me, I am sure For example in the following example the common noun is you are all using your Spanish in order to integrate into Spain bread, or ´pan´: ¿dónde está el pan? ­ where is the milk? Compraste pan and also to communicate with many people. Nothing feels as good, after many years of learning something, as actually – you bought bread, ¿dónde está el pan que compreste? putting into practise does. I love being able to communicate – where is the bread that you bought?

Relative pronouns are used to introduce a clause that with my Spanish friends without having to think about what I am saying, but it has been a long road, and at times frustrat­ modifies a noun, in this example the clause ´I finished last ing and difficult. I had moments where I thought I would never night´ modifies the noun ´book´ Terminé el libro anoche – I finished the book last night, be able to speak to anyone, but, bit by bit I improved and my confidence grew. Wherever you are on this road with me I El libro es muy extenso – the book is very long, El libro que terminé anoche es muy extenso – the book that I fin­ hope you are enjoying yourself.

This week we are looking at relative pronouns, so let´s ished last night is very long The most common relative pronoun is ´que´ It can reder to remind us what a pronoun is, it is a word that relates to a noun, and a relative pronoun is the one that refers to the both people and things, in either the subject or the object position. noun previously mentioned. ´Que´in this context is the Spanish equivalent to the English words: who, which, whom, and that.

The relative pronoun is often left out in English but it can­ not be left out in Spanish: la casa que compramos es nueva – the house (that) we bought is new.

Another relative pronoun is ´quien´. It is used only when referring to people and has a plural form­ ´quienes´: Mi tío, quien es médico, viene a visitarme hoy – my uncle, who is a doctor, is coming to visit me today.

When the relative pronoun refers to a person and is in the direct object position, either "que" or "a quien" may be used.

Each is correct. Make sure that you remember that the "per­ sonal a" is used with "quien" but is not used with "que."

La señorita que conocí anoche es la hermana de María, La señorita a quien conocí anoche es la hermana de María – the young lady who I met last night is Maria´s sis­ ter When the relative pronoun occurs after a preposition and refers to a person, "quien" must be used. After a preposition, "que" is only used to refer to things. ¿dónde está el pan que compreste? › Las mujeres con quienes fuimos a la playa, son nues›

Mi padre es la persona a quien envío la carta tras amigas – the women, with whom we went to the beach, are our friends. El libro en que pienso es extenso, no es corto – the book I´m thinking about is long, not short.

In English, although it is technically incorrect, common usage often finds a sentence ending in a preposition. Please remember that this never occurs in Spanish.

Mi padre es la persona a quien envío la carta – my father is the person I´m sending the letter to, my father is the person to whom I´m sending the letter.

Next week we will carry on with relative pronouns so if you´d like to get yourself prepared and do some revision beforehand, next week´s lesson will be a lot easier.

I will give you some work to do when we have finished all the pronouns so keep revising, keep on top and have a great week.

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TIMING YOUR MEALS TO UNLOCK YOUR WEIGHT LOSS SUCCESS They say time is of the essence, and this is especially true when it comes to eating and nutrition. Timing your meals correctly could be the key that allows you to unlock and reach your weight loss goals more effectively.

There are so many questions which sur­ round eating and weight loss: Should you eat even when you’re not hungry? Should you eat breakfast if you don’t feel like it and should you eat before and/or after you exercise? All these questions will be answered in this article, and it is important to realize that it’s not only what you eat that

counts, but when you eat it as well.

Let’s start with breakfast. Your grandma wasn’t lying when she said breakfast was the most important meal of the day, and it is. After a good couple hours of sleep, your brain has been deprived of nutrition. Your breakfast choice should be made in the attempt to awaken your brain and get your engines running.

For breakfast, you should consume a meal that has adequate carbohydrates and balance it with some protein. Orange juice is also beneficial, first thing in the morning as the glucose (or sugar) it will release into

The little test that might save your life!!!!

your brain is a great way to wake the brain up. An ideal breakfast meal would be scrambled egg whites (protein) on a slice of whole wheat toast (complex carbs) and a glass of orange juice (simple carbs).

A rule of thumb when choosing options for your meals is to eat like a king for break­ fast, a prince for lunch and a pauper for din­ ner.

Eating a big meal early in the morning will give you many hours during the day to burn it off — provided you do participate in physical activity. Late at night, on the other hand, is when your meals are more likely to be stored as fat because you, more than likely, don’t have enough time to burn off the energy before bedtime.

Eating before and after exercise is also

important and will depend on your individ­ ual goals. Let’s just assume your goal is to lose weight. The best time to exercise is first thing in the morning on an empty stom­ ach; this will allow you to burn more calo­ ries. If your goal is muscle and weight gain, you should eat at least two hours before you exercise and ensure you are taking in carbohydrates via a specially formulated sports drink, which will provide your mus­ cles with more energy that is needed to sustain intense, physical activity.

On the question of whether or not you should eat if you’re hungry? The answer is yes. You should consume five to six small, balanced meals throughout the day to keep your energy levels up and your insulin lev­ els sustained.

It is not hard to convince people who understand the value of nutrition that you get more for your money when you buy whole grain products rather than fluffy white bread.

Slice for slice, wheat bread contains 25 times more vitamin E 4.5 times more dietary fiber

3.5 times more magnesium 2.7 times more zinc 2 times more folic acid 3.5 times more chromium 4.5 times more vitamin B6 than white bread does.

Also note that the waists of people who eat white bread grow by 12mm a year.

Swap white for wheat

Some readers will have recently had the letter sent out by the Valencian Health Department offering them the opportunity to take part in the Bowel Cancer Screening Programme.

This is an EU initiative to cut down on the huge num­ bers of deaths as a result of late detection of bowel can­ cer. The programme covers only certain people born during certain years and therefore there are many of you who fall outside the dates. Bowel cancer can occur at almost any age but becomes more common as we get older. As a health care professional I am hugely in favour of screen­

ing programmes because we know that they save lives. The test is easy and not at all embarrassing as all you are required to do is collect a stool sample and pop it in a bag and it is sent away for analysis. The test is looking for something called occult blood the presence of which may indi­ cate a number of conditions bowel cancer being one of them. If you are not eligible for the free health screen­ ing we have made arrange­ ments to do this test for you at a nominal cost of 45 euros. Just think 50 euros is all it might cost to save your life. We have prepared an information sheet on

bowel cancer and we would urge everyone over 50 to have this simple test. The test will be available from March 1st so please do contact us and we will be happy to give you more information.

If you have the test done as part of the Valencian screening programme you should receive a letter con­ firming the results of the test and if you don’t receive a letter don’t just assume that it is because every­ thing was normal. Ask your doctor to confirm the result for you and make sure that you are given the informa­ tion don’t be the one who might slip through the net and not be given the result.

As bowel cancer is so common next week I am going to tell you a little more about what to look for and some of the latest research in terms of self­ help for prevention.

For more information contact us on; on 965 191 514 / 722 219 450 or email info@slimfit­europe.com

Caring for your back DR MACHI MANNU’S ADVICE CLINIC Email your questions and comments to contact@medb.es

People over 40 suffer more from back pain than from any other health prob­ lem. But if you stop a moment and think about it, you quickly realize that the back is confined to very few positions, and in many cases is actually frozen in one position for long periods of time. Of course such rigid positions will result in stress, creating pressure on deli­ cate areas of the back and spine. This pressure leads to tension, causing nervous­ ness, strain, irritation, fatigue and weakness, in general affecting us physi­ cally, emotionally and men­ tally. There is a saying ‘’ you are as young as your spine is flexible’’. The spine acts as a communications sys­

tem and controls many func­ tions of the body and mind.

It is able to release energy within the body and promote alertness and clarity of the brain. It has been known for many centuries that the spine must remain supple and flexible throughout life if you are to experience true health. A stiffening spine is a sign of approaching old age, regardless of years, where­ as a flexible supple spine is a major feature of youth.

The leg pull exercise is a simple stretching exercise that loosens the tension of the legs and spine. It releas­ es endorphins, the feel good hormones, into the body.

Sit on a mat, with your legs out­stretched, and feet together. Sit erect and place

hands on your knees.

Slowly raise your arms in front of you, bring them up and lean backwards. Bring arms up and lean back­ wards. Take a firm hold on your knees and calves.

Gently pull your trunk down­ ward as far as you can with­ out strain, with your elbows bending outward. Let your neck go limp. Hold this posi­ tion for a count of 5 and then slide your hands down your legs, and attempt to hold your ankles firmly. Gently pull your trunk downward as before, bending the elbows outward. Rest your fore­ head close to your knees if possible. Relax and hold for 5 seconds. Then slowly straighten up into start posi­ tion.

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Magnesium makes for good health Q

Many years ago, I was very ill, and doctor’s couldn´t figure out what was wrong with me. I had muscle pain and cramps all over my body, severe migraines, pins and needles, constipation, fatigue, you name it. I tried many drugs and was getting worse until a friend convinced me to try magnesium supplements. I couldn´t believe the difference it made to my health in no time. My migraine disappeared, energy came back and the cramps vanished. I will be very glad if you can highlight the benefits of magnesium as many people are ignorant of how essential this mineral is for good health.

A

Magnesium certainly stands out as one of the most vital minerals for maintaining excellent health. Of course you can say the same for many other nutrients, but in the world of nutrition, some nutrients are more equal than others, and that can be said of magnesium. This is because magnesium regulates the activities of other vital nutrients in the body.

Magnesium is the most abundant mineral in the body after; sodium, potassium and calcium, but it controls the activities of these minerals. In fact magnesium controls over 300 of the most vital chemical reactions in the body. It activates many enzymes, especially those needed to digest food. The solid structure of our skeletal frame is only possible because of the interaction between magnesium and the other bone minerals – calcium and phosphates. Unknown to people, the chemical reactions that occur in our cells are directed by electricity, the same electricity that is measured from the heart with ECG, or from the brain with EEG. And this elec­ tricity is maintained by magnesium. Invariably, magnesium plays a vital role in maintaining the health of the heart and brain. Low levels of magnesium are associated with neuro­ logical symptoms such as depression, confusion and poor

memory. In hospitals, magnesium is used to treat seizures or convulsions. Magnesium is also vital for preventing and treating many disorders of the heart such as high blood pressure and abnormal heart beats. Magnesium relaxes blood vessels and muscle tissue, and for these reasons it helps maintain a healthy blood pressure. People with high blood pressure that is unresponsive to medications have benefited from magnesium supplements. By relaxing the constricted blood vessels of the brain, magnesium also relieves migraines. Researchers have observed that magne­ sium has helped migraine symptoms in 80% of sufferers.

Magnesium plays a role in the transmission of information across nerves, especially pain signals. Low levels of magne­ sium in the body is associated with an increased sensitivity to pain, a condition that occurs in Fibromyalgia. Taking mag­ nesium supplements is known to improve pain hypersensi­ tivity in fibromyalgia sufferers. Another very important role of magnesium is in preventing constipation. During digestion, water is mostly reabsorbed into the intestines, and by the time digesting food reaches the large intestine, it has become hard. Magnesium is responsible for reversing this process and transferring water back into stool, making it soft just before it leaves the body. Most constipation is due to low levels of magnesium and can be easily corrected with mag­ nesium supplements. Fruits and vegetables used to be a good source of magnesium, however due to over farming; it has become deficient in many plants. The recommended Daily Allowance for magnesium is between 300 ­400 mg daily. But many experts have argued that the body needs four times this amount to maintain a healthy state.

Magnesium is very poorly absorbed into the body, and many supplements do not provide what is stated on the label. The best form of magnesium is Magnesium Malate. Other forms

such as carbonate and lactate are not easily absorbed.

Magnesium Chloride also called liquid magnesium can be applied directly to the skin, and it is very well absorbed MITOQ – A BREAKTHROUGH FOR HEART SUPPORT I became interested in MitoQ even before it became available to the public, after reading a published study on how effective it is for treating chronic heart disorders. In that study, people suffering from the life threatening cardiac disorder – car­ diomyopathy, saw their condition improve by 80% after taking MitoQ. Such impressive results are unheard of in the treat­ ment of chronic heart diseases. Since then MitoQ has also proved effective for managing other heart symptoms. I have been recommending MitoQ since it was released a few months ago, and the feedback especially from those with heart problems is impressive. MitoQ is the most powerful form of Co­enzyme Q10 available in the world today. Co­Q10 is the fuel of all the cells in our body. It can be likened to the petrol that our cars run on. Our active organs – heart, brain, kidney and skin – start to breakdown without adequate levels of CoQ10, a condition that occurs as we grow older. By pro­ viding the body with CoQ10, MitoQ significantly improves the performance of the heart and brain. The commonest feed­ back from people on MitoQ is a feeling of having more ener­ gy, an impressive but not surprising achievement, consider­ ing what MitoQ does. An interesting feedback for me has been from someone reporting a complete cure in 2 weeks, of abnormal heart beats that had lasted several years. Other positive reports since last week are; better regulated blood pressure readings as well as improved mental clarity. MitoQ is available from MedB at the discounted price of 43 Euros (60 Capsules). The recommended dose is 2 capsules daily.

Call 965071745. Delivery is free.

Ways to treat and prevent ear pain

If the last time you had an ear infection was back in the second year, consider your­ self lucky. While most of us do get our ear­ aches out of the way in childhood, there are times when adults get them. One bad cold can trigger ear pain that can make even a grown­up cry. Ear pain comes in other forms besides earaches, such as swimmer's ear and "airplane ear." And sometimes what you think is ear pain can be traced to problems with your mouth, teeth, jaw, throat, or sinus­ es. Ear infections usually don't go away on their own. Here are some tips that you can consider to adopt to get relief.

1. Reach For Pain Relief

Take an analgesic such as Extra Strength Tylenol. An over­the­counter pain reliever can help you to feel more comfortable until you can see a doctor.

2. Go For The Garlic

When you have ear pain, eat a clove or two of garlic a day. Garlic has natural antivi­ ral and antibiotic qualities that kill many of the germs that cause earaches. If you are not a fan of fresh garlic, try garlic supple­ ments, available in most health food stores and many drugstores.

3. Apply A Warm Pack

Wing out a washcloth in warm water and place it over your ear. Apply the packs for 10 to 15 minutes every 2 hours. You might also place a cotton ball that has been soaked in warm water into the little crevice between the earlobe and ear opening.

4. Fight Bacteria Or Fungi With Vinegar

Using an eyedropper, drop 6 to 10 drops of an equal mix of distilled white vinegar and water into your ear. The ear canal is usually

a little acidic. An infection caus­ es the canal to lose some of that acidity and encourages bacteria to grow. The vine­ gar rinses help restore this acidity and can help prevent an ear infection from worsening. Avoid these rinses if you know that you have a perforated eardrum, see or feel drainage from your ear, or devel­ op any loss of hearing.

5. Drop In Some Drops

Warm some mineral oil or baby oil and, using an eyedropper, gently drop the oil into your ear canal. Don't use drops if you see or feel drainage from your ear. Drainage is actually a good thing. It means that your eardrum has ruptured and the pus can drain.

Seeing your ear drain can be a bit alarming, but the pain is relieved, and you will feel bet­ ter quickly.

6. Keep Your Head High

Sit up rather than lie down. Reclining can make your ear pain worse.

7. Try Rubbing Alcohol

To help to prevent ear pain such as swim­ mer's ear, place a drop or two of rubbing alcohol into your ear within an hour after you swim. The alcohol will dry out your ear canal but may cause your ears to itch. Don't use alcohol if you have a perforated eardrum, see or feel drainage from your ear, or devel­ op any loss of hearing.

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Friday, February 21, 2014

BRONSON’S A REAL FIGHTER One of the most popular horses at the Rojales­ based Easy Horse Care Rescue Centre has cheat­ ed death and is back safe and sound at home.

Bronson was suddenly taken seriously ill a month ago and rushed to the Centro Policlinico Veterinario Raspeig (Alicante Horse Hospital) in a life or death journey.

Once he got there, Bronson’s problem was dis­ covered by the vet Salvador as a large enterolite almost 15 centimetres long, which had to be removed from his small colon. An enterolite is caused when a horse eats something like a piece of plastic or a foreign body which then gets stuck in the intestine, which Bronson would have eaten long before he was rescued 3 and a half years ago. It can take many years for this for­ eign body to become coat­ ed by the digestive system

in hard calcium which builds up over time. This particular enterolite had moved to the end of Bronson’s colon causing a complete blockage.

Salvador’s team in Alicante discounted the final bill as a gesture of support for the Easy Horse Centre, who were also extremely grateful to long­

Who’s a Smartie then?

Dee Williams from El Raso’s Bar Sofia has become the latest SMARTie– at the first "Spice and Rice" Charity Road Show event by The Spice Hut, Quesada. It’s all in aid of the Elche Children’s Home, with the time supporter Kate Smartie project encouraging people to eat Jensen, who made a gener­ tubes of the famous sweet, and then to fill ous offer of 3 thousand them up with 20 cent coins. Over 100 Euros towards the cost of tubes have been given out and they are Bronson’s treatment. He’s starting to be handed back, filled to the now had his stitches removed and will stay in his stable to recuperate further before being let out into his paddock with his compan­ ions Harry Trotter, Sophia and Katy­Rose.

brim with 20 cent coins, and the different venues handing them even have a barom­ eter to see who is raising the most money!

The Smartie tubes hold €10 worth of 20 cent coins and cost price boxes are avail­ able at Johnson's supermarket in Quesada. If you have a business or a club or if you are an individual and would like to become a SMARTie, please E­mail sueinthesun@hotmail.co.uk

The Pets in Spain charity had a rocking good night thanks to local entertainer Woody who brought the house down for their Valentine’s dinner and dance. La Marina charity shop manager Eve Waring arranged the evening as a major fund­raiser, with Woody soon having everybody up and rock­ ing and rolling on the dance floor. There was

a special auction of a rescued cuddly fluffy tiger with Woody making the highest bid for the tiger’s adoption papers. The night raised the grand total of 733 Euros. To help the charity in any way, then drop into their shop on Calle Francisco de Quevedo, in La Marina, or call Eve Waring on 693 584 574.

Their website is: www.petsinspain.com

Woody cages a tiger

LA MANGA’S GOT IT

Scowling judges and buzzers were the order of the day as a “La Manga’s Got Talent” contest raised 700 Euros for the MABS Mar Menor cancer charity. The whole night was put on by the La Manga Caravanning Club with Alex and Grace Hill organising a line­up of 19 performers, with some 200 people being thoroughly enter­ tained.

This was Alex and Grace’s fifth fundraising event, and their most successful to date.

Alex said: ­ “Everyone knows someone who is touched by cancer, be it a family member or friend, or friend of a family member. We have members who are fighting this illness and it was great to be able to do something positive for MABS, who support cancer suf­ ferers and their families in this area.”

Torrevieja Costa Lions President, Janette Bennett got a birthday night to remember as 100 guests helped her cel­ ebrate at the Restaurante Lo Marubu, Dona Pepa, Quesada. The surprises started early for Janette, as just a few minutes into the evening, members of the Torrevieja Pipes and Drums dropped

in for some impromptu entertainment.

Besides many of Janette’s friends enjoy­ ing the night, staff from Specsavers and members of the Extinguished Firefighters also came along, and though it wasn’t a fund­raising event, a raffle still managed to raise the substan­ tial sum of 300 Euros.

Janette’s piping surprise

Friday, February 21, 2014

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MY DEALINGS WITH WONDERFUL TOM

By Los Montesinos-based journalist and author, Andrew Atkinson Sir Tom Finney was a legend in World football, and it was a privilege to know him personally. I had Sir Tom's home telephone number and indeed whenever I contacted Sir Tom he always obliged with my requests.

Sir Tom wrote the foreword in my book: 'David Beckham­In at The Deep End', the story about Beckham's loan spell at Preston in 1995. And I recall former England national manager Sir Bobby Robson personally and unexpectedly, phoning me to talk about Finney.

After trials at The Lilywhites, Finney was signed in 1946 ­ but he completed a seven years' plumber apprenticeship ­ and became known as 'The Preston Plumber'. After serv­ ing as a desert rat under Montgomery he went on to play for England, earning 76 caps. Called up to the Royal Armoured Corps in 1942, Finney fought in Montgomery's Eighth Army in Egypt and later in Italy in the final offensive to capture Argenta in April 1945 as a Stuart tank driver in 9th Lancers. Local leave in North Africa allowed him to play in army teams against local opposition ­ and on one occasion he played against the future actor, Omar Sharif.

Finney's final game for Preston was in

1960, after 433 games and 187 goals, and in 1988 Finney was knighted.

England and Manchester United legend Bobby Charlton ­ who was a player and manager at Preston in the seventies ­ said Finney's contributions to football were "immeasurable". And the late Stanley Matthews compared Finney to Diego Maradona, Pelé, George Best and Alfredo Di Stéfano. Bill Shankly, who played with Finney at Preston, said Finney was the best footballer ever. Gary Lineker said: “Sir Tom Finney has left us. One of the greatest players this country has ever seen, and a true gentleman.” Preston North End said: “Sir Tom was the greatest player to ever play for the club and one of the all­time greats for England. The thoughts of everyone at the Club, and those connected with it, are with his family at this time."

The 'Splash' Finney statue outside Deepdale has been made a shrine, with fans placing flowers and shirts in his memory, and it was a privilege to see it and to have my photo taken next to it. Against Orient last weekend, all of the Preston players wore 'Finney' on their shirts. And Preston City Council are in talks with Finney's family to have a Civic Funeral. Tom’s wife, Elsie, died from Alzheimer’s in 2004. They had two chil­ dren, Brian, 66, and Barbara, 50. RIP Sir Tom. You will be missed by all of us.

Caterpillar caution HIDDEN ICON

By Sally Bengtsson

It’s that time of year again when the Processionary Caterpillar starts to hit the headlines, with the regular warnings for dog owners and parents of young children about the dangers of this strange­ looking pest.

The warm Winter tempera­ tures mean that Spring­like conditions have appeared earlier this year, and the caterpillars have already started to wriggle down from the pine branches in which they have been snuggled inside a cocoon all winter, to march, in single file to wherever they decide to bury themselves, in order to form a chrysalis and transform into butterflies.

There have been many sightings of Processionary caterpillars across the Costa Blanca and Murcia this year, and last week over 20 people were quite badly hurt after coming into contact with the creatures in Sant Joanet north of Xativa. Two young chil­ dren had to be rushed to hospital and though

Rising water levels at Lake Pedrera in Torremendo, have led to a historic ruin being submerged. "There is only a solitary wall remaining," said Jenni Ray, owner of the Grand Design house which overlooks the lake. The water levels had fallen recently, revealing a bridge that had been hidden for years, but now the levels have risen, they have brought some benefits. “The bird life has come closer”, added Jenni, “and the views of the sunsets are even more awe­ some. But I was having nightmares of being swallowed up by the water!” they have been discharged, they still have to The historic 'iconic ruin' status came from be treated over the next few weeks. its use in the opening credits of the Grand Just touching the caterpillars can cause Designs Abroad Channel 4 TV series ­ with acute dermatitis, eye lesions, strong allergic the backdrop of the setting sun. "When it reactions and uticaria. Dogs are especially was being demolished, presenter Kevin at risk as the acid released by the caterpil­ McCloud drove down in the car, almost driv­ lars which can cause the dog’s tongue to ing into a ditch on the way, to stop its com­ burn away. The quickest remedy if your dog plete demolition. We left a couple of walls, does go up to sniff a crawling trail of these with a window, which framed the view," Jenni caterpillars is to put bicarbonate of soda onto reminisced. the affected area immediately, and then take "It used to belong to the family who has your pet to the vet. The caterpillars are the worst plague for pine trees in Spain, after forest fires. Their presence can be spotted by the white nests which look like huge spi­ der’s webs hanging in the pine trees.

ONE YEAR STRONG

Samaritans in Spain will be celebrating the first birthday of their Punta Marina, Torrevieja shop next Saturday (March 1st), with a full day of fun and games. There’ll be a fashion show from 10.30 am, along with a variety of stalls that’ll be open until the shop shuts for the day at 2.00pm. There’s also going to be some musical entertainment provided from a Barbershop Harmony Group.

the other ruin on the hill ­ now there's only a small orange grove.

The water level rise has cut off the bottom trails ­ and one going to the peninsula: You have to go right around the top, via the pine trees.”

Concerned Jenni sought assurances from the authorities that she and her family would be safe.

"Fortunately we have been told the level will not rise further," she added.

NO NEED TO BE LONELY If you’re on your own and want to make some friends, then the Phoenix Solos could be the group for you.

They’ve been going for over 13 years and they’re aimed at the over­50’s who are after making friends and wanting a better social life. They meet every Monday morning from 11.00am at the Marina Bar, on the water´s edge at the International Marina, Torrevieja, and everyone is

more than welcome to come along and find out what the group gets up to.

Sunday lunches are arranged on a regular basis as well as ten pin bowl­ ing sessions. There’s a wide range of things for you to try out including catamaran sailing, downhill cycling, coach trips, cruises and short holi­ days. For more details, call Alan on 966 188 786 or Janice on 966 789 265

26

Friday, February 21, 2014

MAKE YOUR OWN DELICIOUS BREAD Fill the house with the aroma of fresh-baked bread EASY WHITE BREAD Ingredients 500g strong white flour, plus extra for dusting 2 tsp salt 7g sachet fast­action yeast 3 tbsp olive oil 300ml water

Method

1. Mix the flour, salt and yeast in a large bowl. Make a well in the centre, then add the oil and water, and mix well. If the dough seems a little stiff, add 1­2 tbsp water, mix well then tip onto a light­ ly floured work surface and knead. Once the dough is satin­smooth, place it in a lightly oiled bowl. Leave to rise for 1 hour until doubled in size or place in the fridge overnight.

2. Line a baking tray with baking parchment. Knock back the dough, then gently mould the dough into a ball. Place it on the baking parchment to prove for a further hour until doubled in size.

3. Heat oven to 220C/fan 200C/gas 7. Dust the loaf with flour and cut a cross about 6cm long into the top of the loaf with a sharp knife. Bake for 25­30 mins until golden brown and the loaf sounds hollow when tapped underneath. Cool on a wire rack.

RUSTIC BREAD Ingredients 250g strong white bread flour 1 tsp fast­action dried yeast 1 tbsp olive oil, plus extra for drizzling 200ml sparkling water semolina, for sprinkling (optional) finely chopped rosemary

and Maldon salt, for sprinklng

Method

1. Heat oven to 220C/fan 200C/gas 7. Mix together the flour, yeast and 1/2 tsp salt. Add the oil, then pour in the water gradually, adding enough to make a soft dough. Knead the dough on a lightly floured surface for about 4­5 mins until the dough feels strong, bouncy and has a silky feel to it.

2. Cut the dough into 8 pieces, then roll out into rough rounds about 16­17cm in diameter. (Don’t pile them on top of each other or they will stick together.)

3. Sprinkle a baking sheet or two with semolina if you have it, otherwise leave plain. Lay the breads on the sheets and let them sit for 5 mins, then scatter with rosemary, salt and pep­ per and drizzle with olive oil. Bake in batches for 8­10 mins until puffy and golden. Can be made 3­4 hrs ahead.

ROQUEFORT & WALNUT ROLLS Ingredients 140g walnuts 100g wholemeal flour

27

Friday, February 21, 2014 400g strong white bread flour 14g sachet fast­action yeast 25g butter 250g Roquefort cheese, crumbled 2 medium eggs, beaten

sea salt, to serve (optional)

Method

1. Put the flour into a bowl and mix in the salt. Mix the yeast into 325ml tepid water.

Add the water and oil to the flour, then mix well with a plastic scraper or your Method hands. When most of the liq­ 1. Place the walnuts in a uid is incorporated, use your food processor and hands to bring all the ingre­ pulse to chop finely; dients together into a ball of dough. leave to one side. Put the flours, 10g salt, yeast, butter and 2. Tip the dough out onto a worktop lightly dusted with flour 300ml water in a bowl, stir together and begin massaging the and work it by pulling and stretching for at least 10 mins. Try ingredients for a minute. If the mixture seems dry, add more to get as much air into it as possible. Put the ball of worked water a tbsp at a time to make a soft but not sticky dough, dough into a well­oiled bowl, cover with a little more oil and a then knead in the bowl for a further couple of minutes to bring tea towel or cling film. Leave to rest for 1 hr or so in a non­ the dough together. draughty warm spot, until doubled in size.

2. Tip the dough onto a lightly floured work surface and 3. Now stretch the dough out onto a baking sheet until it’s knead well for 10 mins before returning to the bowl. Cover about 20 x 30cm. Leave the dough to rise again to about half the bowl with cling film and leave to rise in a warm place for as high again, about 30­40 mins in a warm draught­free 1 hr. Briefly knead the walnuts into the dough, then leave to place, loosely covered with a tea towel. rise in the bowl for a further 20 mins.

4. Heat oven to 180C/160C fan/gas 4. When the dough has 3. Tip the dough out onto a lightly floured surface and roll out risen, press your fingers into it gently to make some holes. into a rectangle, approx 50 x 20cm, 1cm thick. Sprinkle the Bake for about 15 mins, then remove from the oven. Tear Roquefort evenly over the dough and lightly press in. Place over the mozzarella, then bake for another 5­10 mins until the rectangle width­ways in front of you and roll up the rec­ golden and cooked through. Drizzle over the pesto and scat­ tangle like a Swiss roll. Cut into 8 equal sized pieces and ter with sea salt, if you like. Serve straight away. place them onto a lightly greased baking tray, cut­side down.

Cover with cling film and leave to rise for 1 hr.

CHEESY GARLIC BREAD 4. Heat oven to 220C/200C fan/gas 7. Brush each round of Ingredients dough with the beaten egg and bake for 20 mins. Leave to cool for a few minutes and eat while still warm. These are 500g strong white bread flour delicious on their own or served with a soup or a chunky 7g sachet/1½ tsp fast­action yeast 1 tsp salt salad with apple in it.

2 tbsp olive oil 1 tbsp clear honey FOCACCIA WITH PESTO AND 2 garlic cloves, crushed

MOZZARELLA Ingredients

500g strong white bread flour, plus some for dusting 1 ½ tsp salt 7g sachet fast­action yeast 2 tbsp extra­virgin olive oil, plus some for drizzling 125g ball mozzarella, drained 5 tbsp pesto

25g soft butter 100g mature cheddar, grated handful thyme leaves

Method

1. Measure the flour, yeast and salt into a large bowl. Mix 300ml hand­hot water with the oil and honey in a jug, then pour into the dry mix, stirring all the time to make a soft dough.

2. Turn the dough out onto a lightly floured surface, then knead for 5 mins until the dough no longer feels sticky, sprinkling with a little more flour as you need it. Now stretch it to fit the Swiss roll tin.

3. Mix the garlic with the butter, then dot over the dough.

Sprinkle over the cheese and snip over the thyme. Cover the bread with lightly oiled cling film, then leave in a warm place to rise for 40 mins.

4. Heat oven to 200C/fan 180C/gas 6. Remove the cling film, then bake the bread for 30 mins until golden and risen.

Leave to cool for 10 mins, then cut into 12 pieces and serve.

28

Friday, February 21, 2014

SPANISH NEWS

FLUSH IT DOWN Spain’s tight squeeze

A Barcelona woman got more than she bargained for when she went to spend a penny. She’s had to have skin grafts on her legs after a toilet that she was using exploded in a Barcelona bar. The woman was sitting in loo in a bar in Barcelona’s Gothic Quarter when the toilet she was sitting on exploded underneath her, giving her second and third degree leg burns. According to the police, the blast was caused by the

unhygienic conditions of the septic tank and the lack of ventilation in the lavatory. When the woman switched on the light, a spark acted as a trigger for the methane gas which filled the toilet.

As the victim was sitting down, the gas was compressed therefore causing a strong blast. According to Cataluña Radio, the woman is suing the owners of the bar for the serious injuries she sustained.

Spanish car park spaces are some of the tightest in Europe according to a survey, which suggests that at times motorists are not even able to leave because of the way the cars are parked, especially in under­ ground car parks.

Drivers are often seen scrambling across their vehicles and contorting themselves to squeeze out of the passenger­side door because they don't have room to open their own. Getting into the spaces isn't always easy either, as the scraped­off bodywork paint on concrete columns in some parks proves.

EuroTest, a partnership of 18 automobile

clubs in 17 countries, has released a report showing that Spanish parking places are offi­ cially the tightest in Europe. The Real Automóvil Club de Catalunya (RACC), one of the participating groups, said that the rules in Barcelona insist only that parking places be 2.2 metres wide and 4.5 metres long. That is much tighter than elsewhere in Europe, where parking bays are typically 20­ 30cm wider and 30cm longer.

Madrid motorists don't fare much better, with the capital insisting only on 2.25 metre­ wide spaces. EuroTest’s recommendation suggests that parking bays should be at least 2.5m wide to fit modern vehicles.

A part­time painter who believed he had God­given powers to 'cure' small breasts and numerous bodily malformations has been released on bail by Barcelona police despite being accused of sexual abuse. The 54­year­old man worked only with female 'patients', claiming "God had given him the powers" to heal women both physically and emotionally.

He claimed to be able to diagnose illness­ es his patients were not aware they had, including fibromyalgia, tumours, deforma­ tions and future deafness. His modus operandi for 'treating' small breasts and gen­ ital disorders involved massaging the 'trou­ bled area' while "blowing his healing breath

into it", Catalan daily La Vanguardia report­ ed.

The healer's wife and daughter also car­ ried out the alleged treatment, with patients as young as 13 sometimes being told to strip before being massaged. Originally a house­ painter, the accused had built up such a loyal clientele that he was eventually able to live off his healing sessions alone, charging 10 Euros an hour.

His methodology and success were even­ tually called into question by his patients, who decided to file a report against him on February 6th this year. The man, who has been accused of sexual abuse and betrayal of trust, is out on bail while he awaits trial.

Breast “booster” freed Bring your own pillow!

A Valladolid hospital has been slammed for telling outpatients with kidney conditions that they need to bring along their own pillows to treatment ses­ sions. Outpatients under­ going haemodialysis ses­ sions at Valladolid's University Hospital (HCU) will now have to bring pil­ lows with them. As of last week, the key items of bedding will only be sup­ plied to current inpa­ tients.

Valladolid's HCU is one of two large hospitals in the city and the institution came under fire last year when it emerged the catering firm that runs its canteen was charging 10 cents for a glass of tap water.

Friday, February 21, 2014

29

SPANISH NEWS

BANKIA RECOVERY

FIZZED OFF

Bailed out bust bank Bankia is to have its govern­ ment stake in it sold off over the next two to three years, according to its President, Jose Ignacio Goirigolzarri.

Bankia became the symbol of Spain's financial crisis when it lost more than 19 billion Euros in 2012 and pushed the government to ask its Eurozone partners for 41 billion Euros in rescue loans to shore up the entire banking system. Under the terms of the European Union's 2012 bailout, the Spanish government has until 2017 to sell its 68 % stake in Bankia.

"It would be reasonable for the privatiza­ tion process to be similar to what is being carried out with Lloyds. That is, that it be car­ ried out in phases and take two or three years," the Bankia president told the news­ paper ABC. He was referring to the British government's sale of six percent of Lloyds bank in September, five years after the state rescue of the lender. Earlier this month Lloyds, which is now 33­percent owned by the British taxpayer, said it was preparing for a possible second sale. The Spanish gov­ ernment will first put smaller stakes in Bankia up for sale, Goirigolzarri said.

"The first stakes will be smaller than the following ones. We have to think of starting with between five and 10 percent," he said.

Bankia earlier this month reported a net prof­ it of 509 million Euros for 2013, after a cata­ strophic 19.2­billion Euros loss the previous year, and announced it had wrapped up a painful restructuring two years early.

The results marked a dramatic turnaround for Spain's fourth­largest bank by market value, which was born in 2010 from the merger of seven troubled savings banks.

Bankia has had to shut more than 1,000 branches and shed thousands of staff in a restructuring.

Thousands of Coca Cola workers took to the streets of Madrid on Saturday, protest­ ing against the planned clo­ sure of four bottling plants, including one in Alicante, which would see twelve­hun­ dred employees lose their jobs. Demonstrators, some coming from other Spanish cities, carried banners con­ demning the layoffs and call­ ing for a boycott of Coca­Cola.

Coca­Cola Iberian Partners, the multinational's only bot­ tling company in Spain, said at the end of January the closures were needed to improve efficiency. But workers argue the layoffs are unjustified since the company is making a profit. Coca­Cola Iberian Partners, which currently has 4,000 employees on its books, was founded last year by merging the seven bottling companies in Spain owned by the US brand. Under the restructuring plan,

four of the 11 plants in Spain ­­ Fuenlabrada near Madrid, Palma, Oviedo and Alicante ­­ will close. Of the affected 1,250 jobs, 750 will be axed and 500 relocated to other plants.

Management and trade unions had until today(Friday) to come up with an agree­ ment, but talks stalled after union represen­ tatives demanded the whole plan be scrapped, which the company rejects.

A birthday party for a Madrid university student took a nasty turn as one of the guests went into coma after tucking into the birthday cake which had been baked with marijuana! Nine other partygoers also needed medical attention last Saturday.

The partygoers, all males aged 19 to 22 from the city’s Alfonso X University, were treated at the Puerta del Hierro Hospital for symptoms including eupho­ ria and tachycardia – a faster than nor­ mal heart rate. One of the young men was so badly affected by the 'high' that paramedics found him in a comatose state and unresponsive to stimulus.

"One of them brought (the cake) from his village," university dean José Domínguez de Posada told Spanish news agency EFE. "There's no way an incident of this calibre will go unpunished," he added with regard to

An American guy lay in a Valencia hospital for three days, whilst the police and his family looked for him, yet the hospital didn’t tell the authorities that he was safe and sound. 44 year old Tim Marr disappeared in Valencia City on Tuesday of last week on after leaving a message on the answering machine of his company at around 8.30 am. This was the last his family heard from him, and when he did not return within 10 hours, they reported his disappearance to the police. His car was found but no signs gave any indication of where he might be – until, the day after he went missing, a co­director revealed Mr Marr had planned to commit sui­ cide. the potential suspensions the students face The National Police, as a matter of rou­ after a serious grilling from the Guardia Civil. tine, contacted all the hospitals in and

around Valencia as soon as they were told Tim was missing, but all of these – including Valencia General – said nobody of his description had been admitted, nor attended to in A&E. After going back to Valencia General last Saturday, police were told this time that the missing man had indeed been admitted on the morning of the day he was thought to have vanished. They said he had arrived there conscious but 'strangely drowsy' and, after tests, found he had overdosed on pharmaceutical drugs.

Hospital staff insist that they notified the duty court judge 'following standard proce­ dure' and found it 'strange' that the court had not told the police. Managers at the hospital found it equally 'strange' that the police had been told by the medical centre itself that the missing American had not been admitted.

Cake packs a punch

Buck-passing in missing yank riddle

30

Friday, February 21, 2014

UK HEADLINES

'Ghost' Caught on CCTV Dog dies from chewing up its owner's E-CIGARETTE

A smashed glass. The CCTV stopping inexplicably in the early hours.

And this mysterious footage (pictured) just before the film cut out.

It reveals a ghostly figure appearing to materialise in the empty bar of Ye Olde Man and Scythe, in Bolton.

Manager Tony Dooley spotted the appar­ ent spectre when he checked the cameras on Friday morning, having noticed they’d stopped dead at 6.18am.

"I came down and saw a glass smashed on the floor so I was instantly suspicious and went to check the CCTV and found it has stopped working," he explained.

"We checked the footage and it revealed this figure.

"To be honest I was a bit concerned ­ I'm a bit of a sceptic when it comes to ghosts but you become more of a believer when you see things like that."

The pub, which dates from 1251, is the fourth­oldest pub in Britain and is reputedly haunted by the Seventh Earl of Derby, James Stanley.

The royalist, whose family originally owned the inn, is said to have spent the last

hours of his life there before he was beheaded in 1651 towards the end of the Civil War. The chair he sat in before he was taken outside and executed is still in the pub today ­ and some say so is he.

Hundreds of soldiers and civilians were also killed outside the pub in the Bolton Massacre of 1644.

With such a bloody history, it has long been considered a hotspot for paranormal activity and a psychic evening held there in 2006 reportedly found it to be haunted by at least 25 spirits.

Among them is said to be a woman who hung herself in the cellar several centuries ago as well as an eight­year­old girl and a phantom dog.

"There have always been rumours it is haunted and we've had psychic readings done here in the past," said Dooley.

"Occasionally you hear things and wonder if it's just the building settling down or whether it's something else.

"It's the fourth­oldest pub in Great Britain so it's had its fair share of deaths and what­ not."

A bizarre plan to stuff sheep’s wool into Parliament’s draughty roofs has been agreed ­ in a bid to make the historic palace more eco­friendly.

MPs have signed off the work, using the animal­led centuries­old technique, to start next year.

The plan emerged as officials continue to count the cost of a much bigger refurbish­ ment of Parliament which could see MPs and peers leaving the building for another site for years.

The building is now so rundown it would be demolished were it not one of the most famous landmarks in the world, a report found last year.

At least £1billion worth of repairs are needed to remove asbestos, repair brick­

work and upgrade water and electricity sup­ plies.

As part of the refurbishment the whole of Parliament will be insulated with the wool next year.

The development comes after images taken by energy firm Npower revealed that Parliament was wasting “copious” amounts of heat.

A spokesman for Parliament said: “The new insulation is being installed as part of a larger project to repair the cast­iron roof of the Houses of Parliament.

“The project is expected to ensure that the roof remains serviceable for another 150 years, and will give us the opportunity to improve our environmental performance rat­ ings and fire safety systems.”

Houses of Baa-liament

A dog has become the first pet in Britain to be killed by an electronic cigarette.

Staffordshire Bull Terrier Ivy died within hours of chewing on a bottle of nicotine­ laced liquid used to fuel the smoke­free vaporiser.

Her owner Keith Sutton, 56, bought the device in a bid to cut down on his tobacco habit.

The battery­powered aid works by heat­ ing up the 'e­liquid' into a gas which the user inhales like real cigarette smoke.

Coach driver Mr Sutton, of Redruth, Cornwall, had left a bottle of the liquid on his dining room table when 14­month­old Ivy bit into it.

She immediately started frothing at the mouth and vomiting and Keith rushed her to the vets, where she was given huge doses of steroids, but died from nicotine poisoning early the next day.

There are currently warnings on the bottles but grandfather Keith wants to see e­liquid become a controlled substance before it kills another animal.

He said: 'I peered round the corner from the kitchen and the dog was on the floor with the bottle of e­liquid.

'She had chewed it and pierced the plastic container. She had only ingested the tiniest amount but by the time I picked her up she was frothing at the mouth.

'I attempted to cool her down with cold water but I don't know any dog first aid, I just did whatever came into my mind.

'Her tongue was blue, her lips were blue.

She messed herself, then she vomited. My partner was on the phone to the vet who said get her here as quickly as possible.

'When we got there the vet went on to the veterinary websites but couldn't find any­ thing about nicotine poisoning.

'He eventually went away and got an old book on poisons. He shook his head and told us it wasn't good.

'He gave her an injection of steroids, then put her on a drip and promised to phone us every couple of hours through the night.

'They said the first 12 hours were critical and we received a call after 12 and a half hours saying she had passed away. Her lungs and heart had given up.'

Keith ­ who uses an eKarma Vaporiser fuelled by k­Liquid ­ is one of an estimated four million people in Britain who have turned to electronic cigarettes.

The World Health Organisation has refused to endorse the device until long­term

trials prove they are safe.

The e­liquid itself contains chemicals such as propylene glycol and polyethylene glycol 400 which are mixed with vegetable glycerin and various flavourings, plus varying amounts of nicotine.

While it would take a large dose of nicotine to harm a human, experts say a dog would only have to ingest 10 milligrams per kilo­ gram of animal weight to be in danger.

There have been reports of pets fatally chewing on tobacco but Ivy is believed to be Britain's first canine victim of e­liquid.

Keith wants to see much clearer health warnings on bottles and wants them sold as controlled substances like medicines or alco­ hol.

Ivy, who came from an RSPCA rescue centre, was treated at Animal Veterinary Services in Hayle, Cornwall.

Vets there confirmed that Ivy's symptoms, which included vomiting, diarrhoea, difficulty in breathing and heart problems, are all typ­ ical of nicotine poisoning.

A spokesperson said: 'The dog started to get a reaction after 30 seconds of piercing the bottle.

'We managed to keep her going for a few hours, but she died in the early hours of Monday morning.

'The fluid is potentially fatal for dogs and they are perfectly capable of putting a tooth through the packaging.'

Friday, February 21, 2014

UK HEADLINES

31

FRENCH ALPS MURDER BREAKTHROUGH A former police marksman was arrested today in connection with the brutal murders of a British family in the French Alps.

The 48­year­old gun enthusiast, named locally as Eric Devouoassoux, lives close to where the brutal killings took place, near Lake Annecy, in eastern France, in September 2012 and was a serving officer at the time.

Three members of the al­Hilli family ­ satellite engi­ neer Saad, 50, his wife Ikbal, 47, her mum Suhaila al­ Allaf, 74, and Frenchman Sylvain Mollier were each executed with two shots to the back of the head in a wooded lay­by.

The Al­Hilli’s daughter Zeinab, seven, was treated for a bullet wound and severe head injuries, while her sister Zeena, four, survived after hiding from the killer beneath her mother’s body.

Horrifically she was only discovered by police eight hours after the barbaric murders.

The murder suspect, who has not been named, was reportedly sacked in October from his job as a city police officer in Menthon­Saint­Bernard, which also lies along Lake Annecy.

He had since been working as a security guard at Geneva

airport, 40 miles away in neighbouring Switzerland.

The man, described as “a reserved mountain man” was arrested at gunpoint at his home in the hamlet of Lathuile ­ just two miles from the murder scene ­ at about 10am Tuesday.

Officers from the CIGN, a tactical military unit, joined local police in the raid, just a few miles from the crime scene in Chevaline.

He was taken to a police station in Chambery for questioning where he could remain for up to four days.

Locals said he kept a number of weapons at the house which was tonight being searched by police.

A number of his associates, including his wife, were also being questioned by cops.

A mobile phone belonging to the man was in the area of the crime on the day of the murders, accord­ ing to local reports which also said old firearms were seized from his house.

A second raid also took place on a house in the village of Talloires, which had been recently pur­ chased by the suspect and weeks later put up for rent.

Police were seen digging up the garden and car­ rying out searches using metal detectors.

The arrest, billed as “a major breakthrough” in the 18­ month investigation, comes three months after French police published an e­fit picture of a biker seen by witnesses near the crime scene moments before the attack.

also have to wait three months before claiming Housing ben­ efit as well.

Work and Pensions Secretary Iain Duncan Smith said: ‘As part of the Government’s long­term economic plan we have taken action to make sure our economy delivers for people who want to work hard, play by the rules and contribute to this country.

‘These reforms will ensure we have a fair system ­ one which provides support for genuine workers and jobseekers, but does not allow people to come to our country and take advantage of our benefits system.

‘The British public are rightly concerned that migrants should contribute to this country, and not be drawn here by

the attractiveness of our benefits system.’

The level of the minimum income requirement will be per­ manently pegged to the level of the National Insurance Contributions Threshold, which is £149 a week­­£7755 a year­­ in 2013/14, and £153 a week, or £7956 a year, in 2014/15.

The changes come after David Cameron set out a number of areas where he wanted the benefit system to be tightened in a speech last year.

The Prime Minister demanded action amid concerns from MPs that the end of restrictions on new arrivals from Bulgaria and Romania ­ lifted on January 1st ­ would lead to a huge influx of migrants.

Since January 1st all migrants from the European Economic Area have been subjected to a tougher ‘habitual residence test’ and will have to wait for three months before they can get income­based JSA. If they pass the test jobseekers will then only be able to get JSA for 6 months. After 6 months, only those who have a job offer or compelling evidence that they have a genuine chance of finding work will be able to continue claiming.

A DWP source added: ‘This is all part of the Government’s long term plan to cap welfare and reduce immigration so our economy delivers for people who actively contribute and want to work hard and play by the rules.’

EARN £149 A WEEK BEFORE YOU GET BENEFITS

Foreign migrants will be banned from receiving benefits unless they earn a minimum of £149 a week, under new rules unveiled Wednesday.

From March 1st people from European countries who claim to have been in work or self­employed in order to gain access to a wider range of benefits will face a more robust test.

Under current EU law the definition of a ‘worker’ is very broad meaning that those who work just a few hours a week in a pub once a week can access Housing Benefit, Child Benefit and Child Tax Credits.

To show they are undertaking genuine and effective work in the UK a European migrant will have to show that for the last three months they have been earning at the level at which employees start paying National Insurance.

The new minimum income threshold is the equivalent of working 24 hours a week at the minimum wage.

Those who qualify as a ‘worker’ will be able to claim ben­ efits, including JobSeeker’s Allowance if they fall out of work.

They will also be able to claim Income Support and Employment and Support Allowance as well.

Those who fail to meet the minimum income requirement will be classed as a jobseeker or not economically active and will have to wait three months after they start searching for work before they can claim JSA. From April 1st they will

32

Friday, February 21, 2014

Horoscopes Aries March 21 ­ April 19 The hard work and good business sense that you’ve put into your job may finally be paying off, Aries. Expect some positive changes to take place at the workplace this week. Today you’re likely to be feeling especially energetic and decide to give your house a thorough cleaning. Don't try to do this on your own, however. You need to conserve your energy. Get other members of your household to help!

Taurus April 20 ­ May 20 Insights that may come welling up from the past could be put to work for you in a positive way, Taurus. You could use them as inspiration for a creative project of some kind, or you could just make them work for you in your day­to­day dealings with others. You should be feeling espe­ cially romantic and sexy today, and you might want to go shopping for clothes made of soft, touchable fabrics.

Gemini May 21 ­ June 20 Your home might need some work today, Gemini. You and other members of your household could decide to join forces and get everything done. This might simply involve a thorough cleaning, or it could mean major repairs of some sort, perhaps plumbing or electrical. If the latter, it isn't a good idea to try to do this yourself. There could be factors involved that are more complicated than they seem.

Cancer June 21 ­ July 22 Expect a lot of letters and phone calls from lovers, close friends, or children today, Cancer. You might also want to make a few yourself. Some positive and interesting infor­ mation may have come your way that you'll want to share with those close to you. You could also want to try your hand at writing.

You'll want to make sure that you remember whatever it is you learn today, Cancer, as it could prove valuable in the future.

By Pandora Leo July 23 ­ August 22 Studying some paperwork involving your finances could bring a pleasant surprise.

You’re better off than you thought, Leo! Dividends or benefits of some kind might be forthcoming. You could decide to treat your­ self, buy some gifts for your family, or per­ haps do some work on your home. Do take care to avoid impulse buying, and don't go crazy spending. You don't want your funds to disappear as quickly as they came!

Virgo August 23 ­ September 22 Today some information might come your way that inspires you to come up with some valuable new ideas, Virgo. Your own intuitive faculties are operating at a very high level, and therefore your insights could prove valu­ able. Make sure you cover every possible contingency. This knowledge could be used to advance your own career and financial interests, so you may want to spend an hour or two writing down your thoughts.

Libra September 23 ­ October 22 Your intuition, physical and intellectual energy, and insight are at an all­time high today, Libra.

You'll probably want to spend much of the day alone, reflecting on your ideas and deciding how you want to put them to work for you. At some point, you may want to put your thoughts in writing. You could also tune in more strongly than usual to the thoughts and feelings of others.

Scorpio October 23 ­ November 21 You could well be bubbling over with physical energy today, Scorpio. You might want to spend your day visiting with friends. You could pick up some interesting information from them, which you might be able to put to work for you. You could lay plans for finally attaining a long­term goal; perhaps a lucky break made this possible. Expect to spend most of your day talking and planning!

Sagittarius November 22 ­ December 21 Visitors in your home, perhaps invited by others in your household, could put a crimp in your desire to be alone and hash out your thoughts today, Sagittarius. Your mind is sharp and ideas should come thick and fast. Don't get so irritated with the sit­ uation at home that you sabotage your plans. You might want to go off some­ where by yourself, possibly to simply sequester yourself in your own room.

Capricorn December 22 ­ January 19 You’re very intuitive by nature, Capricorn, and today you should be feeling especially so. Don't be surprised if you spontaneously tune in to the ideas and emotions of those around you, or even if you and someone else come up with the same words at the same time. Use your insights to increase your understanding of others. You might also find that they bring artistic inspiration and even advance your worldly ambitions.

Aquarius January 20 ­ February 18 This should be one of those days when you feel as if you could conquer the world. You feel strong and determined, Aquarius, and willing to do whatever it takes to get wherever you want to be. A goal could be attained at this time, ambitions realized, or perhaps a lucky break could come your way. This is an excellent day to seek a new job, ask for a raise, or make a favorite project a success.

Pisces February 19 ­ March 20 A business or love partner could bring opportunities for advancement your way today, Pisces. You may decide to draft or execute legal papers that could be very important to your future. Travel might somehow be involved. Romance looks promising today. Your confidence and enthusiasm are showing in your face and could make you seem more attractive than usual, both to your partner and strangers.

33

Friday, February 21, 2014

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services com­ pany on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain seven years ago hav­ ing left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: Mary wanted to connect her iPad to her TV to ADVICE: Ken wanted some help moving and managing watch movies. his pictures on his iPad

Q

Hi Richard and Liesl. I have a VPN on my iPad to obtain Netflix which works most of the time. I am using Surfeasy as a VPN. However I want to know how I can con­ nect my iPad to a smart TV, Samsung series 6510, so that I can see Netflix on TV. Any solutions? Thanks Mary

Hey Richard, we purchased a 'Mini i Pad' and want to use a memory stick so we could 1. Transfer photographs from the 'i Pad' to my computer 2. Transfer photographs and files from my computer to Jacqui's It would be very much appreciated if you could recommend a manufacturer / make of stick that may meet this requirements.

Again, in advance many thanks for your help in this matter, Oh Wise One. Kind regards Ken & Jacqui

Q

Hi Ken, sorry but you can’t use a USB stick on an iPad, there is no slot for it. What most people use is some sort of online storage service like DropBox – feel free to use my invite below to set yourself (and Jacqui) up if you like – its free, just click on the link below… https://db.tt/ZSvplToo …with the iPad you can set it to automatically sync its photos to DropBox, you can then auto­ matically download those photos to your computer also using DropBox. In terms of a USB stick to move from one computer to another, any stick on the market will do for that task.

A

Hi Mary, you don’t mention which iPad you have so I am going to assume you have one of the latest ones with the lightning connector. In this case you would need to buy the following (or equivalent)… http://store.apple.com/uk/product/MD826ZM/A/lightning­digital­av­ adapter?fnode=3a …which will then enable you to connect an HDMI cable from your iPad to the TV. Hope that helps.

A

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternately why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:­ www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

ADVICE: Robin received a .odt file as an attachment and wanted to know how to open it.

Hi Richard, I have received a couple of mails with minutes of meetings attached.

Unfortunately, whereas they have always previously been sent as .doc this time they are .odt and when I try to open them, I get a page of gibberish, which looks remarkably like ms­dos. Any sug­ gestions please. Thanks Robin

Q

A

Hi Robin, these are OpenOffice text documents, you can open them with OpenOffice which is freely downloadable from openoffice.org if you don’t already have it installed on your laptop.

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

34

Friday, February 21, 2014

THIS IS THE MCLAREN 650S McLaren has revealed more details about its 650S, a 207mph supercar set to be launched at the Geneva motor show next month.

The latest car will bring McLaren Automotive’s range to four in total, and sit alongside the 12C Coupé, 12C Spyder and P1. It is based on the 12C, but uses lessons taken from the P1 project to make it more powerful and, says McLaren, better to drive.

The twin­turbocharged V8 engine has been boosted from the 12C’s 616bhp to 641bhp, thanks to cylinder head modifica­

tions, changes to the pistons and improved cooling efficiency. Torque has increased from 442lb ft to 500lb ft, delivered between 3,000­7,000rpm.

As a result, the 650S sprints from 0­ 62mph in 3sec and from 0­124mph in 8.4sec.

McLaren says that the 12C is not intended to be a stripped­out road­racer such as the Ferrari 458 Speciale, but a car that is both faster and better equipped than the standard 12C, extending its breadth of capability in both directions.

The company has also worked on making it more engaging to drive, particularly in rela­ tion to the speed of gearshifts from its seven­speed dual­clutch ’box, plus the response from throttle and brake pedals.

The drivetrain engineers have even devel­ oped a system whereby on upshifts, provid­ ed you are in Sport mode and using more than 70 per cent throttle, two of the cylinders are momentarily cut so that the engine pro­ duces a louder sound than before.

The 650S has 22 per cent stiffer springs front and rear as well as new Pirelli P Zero Corsa tyres, but McLaren says that all this hasn’t resulted in a deterioration in ride qual­ ity over the 12C. At the other end of the spectrum, McLaren says that turn­in at high speeds is “much, much better” than the 12C, there is a significant reduction in bodyroll and the software has been recalibrated to make the car easier to drift.

Many of the upgrades present on the 650S were taken from what McLaren gleaned from the P1 project, and the car also uses a revised front end with P1­esque LED headlights, plus aerodynamic tweaks.

At the rear of the car the styling is much more like the 12C, albeit with the option of even more carbon­fibre.

The 650S will be available from March in Coupé and Spyder body styles. The 650S Coupé will cost from £195,000, and the Spyder from £215,000, both representing £20,000 premiums over their respective models in the 12C range.

McLaren expects to build 1,300 12C and 650S models this year, with about 80 per cent of buyers likely to go for the Spyder folding hard­top version.

The company has already delivered 40 of the 375 P1 hypercars it is building. The car, which has a top speed of 217mph and costs £866,000, sold out within six months of its debut at the 2013 Geneva motor show.

McLaren also has a waiting list of 40 cus­ tomers, thought to include Formula One driver Jenson Button, should any of the existing 375 orders fall through.

The arrival of the 650S means that McLaren Automotive is sticking to its prom­ ise of launching one new car per year. Next on the list will be the P13 junior supercar, launching in 2015 and costing about £120,000, while in 2016 there will be a car to sit in between the 650S and P1, costing in the region of £400,000. The company says it has no plans to diversify from mid­engined sports cars.

Vauxhall launches powerful 1.0 engine

OLD­FASHIONED 1.6­litre petrol engines in Vauxhall cars are about to be replaced by a clever new 1.0­litre alternative.

The tiny newcomer has only three cylinders, but thanks to a turbocharger it coughs up more power and torque than many normal 1.6­litre equivalents.

It’s set to debut in Vauxhall’s funky Adam supermini, although the new engine will be display­only when it emerges at the Geneva Motor Show next month.

Vauxhall is claiming efficiency figures of 99g/km and up to 62mpg, although

the fuel economy figures can be noto­ riously hard to match. The company has, at least, taken significant steps to make the new engine as quiet and refined as possible.

It will be linked to a new six­speed gearbox that shaves 30% off the previ­ ous version’s weight, which helps to increase efficiency.

Ford has already proved the worth of a 1.0­litre turbocharged petrol with its EcoBoost unit, which has sold in the tens of thousands since its release into cars like the Fiesta, Focus and B­ Max.

Friday, February 21, 2014

35

36

Friday, February 21, 2014

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 17 represents M and 20 represents Z, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across

Down

1 Snares (5) 4 Tally (5) 8 Unfinished business (5,4) 9 Sprint (3) 10 Pitcher (4) 11 Futile (7) 12/16 Long distance (3,3) 13 Counterfeit (4) 15 Information (4) 16 See 12 18 Employment (7) 19 Farm building (4) 22 Beverage (3) 23 Complex (9) 24 Blockade (5) 25 Connections (5)

1 More loftier (6) 2 Love (5) 3 Look for (4) 4 Agree (6) 5 Wobbly (8) 6 Anguish (7) 7 Finishes (4) 12 Ladylike (8) 14 Debts (7) 16 Middle (6) 17 Except if (6) 18 Badger’s burrow (4) 20 Once more (5) 21 Invoice (4)

Last weeks Solution

Across: 1 Bare, 3 Sharp, 8 Genuine, 9 Treat, 10 Cheat, 11 Correct, 12 Noises, 14 Latest, 17 Replace, 19 Class, 21 Ratio, 22 Proverb, 24 Stale, 25 Dawn.

Down: 1/23 Big Ben, 2 Range, 3 Stench, 4 After, 5 Precede, 6 Little, 7 Statutes, 10 Contrary, 13 Impetus, 15 Anchor, 16 Temple, 18 Aroma, 20 Arena.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross­Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

Down CRYTPIC CLUES 1 An intellectual elated by Across 1 Hello, loud one and Byron’s first line (8) music player (2­2) 2 Little Alfred returned with 3 Pride fed badly, in small me, sweetheart (5) amounts (4­4) 4 Gerard is upset by what 9 Shot a boss, given per­ might upset a bull (3,3) mission! (2,5) 5 Studies intensely the tiny 10 A debauched fellow holes (5) named the capital of 6 Avoiding badly dug line Normandy (5) 11 King able to transform (7) 7 Refuse in the garden Dickens’ house (5) 12 An American metal yard (4) 8 Consider conker somewhere in Texas (6) 14 Figure there’s nothing smashed (6) 13 Army unit metering new in web diary (6) 16 Insubstantial silver works (8) found in lake (6) 15 Hooligan accepting old 19 A learner joins class fine, be careful! (7) that’s official (6) 17 Trees you wouldn’t 21 Name a first class expect to see in a nursery?

Middle Eastern country (5) (6) 24 Egg­shaped duck near 18 Flake of silver, maybe a hole (5) (6) 25 Note ever so badly writ­ 20 When left with fashion ten using too many words she is apt to display (5) (7) 26 Pioneers such as pay 22 Prime British museum contains endless loop (5) their bills (8) 27 Greek character in 23 Indicates assent, as the sleepy man does (4) street filth (4) STANDARD CLUES Down Across 1 Intellectual (8) 1 Reproduction of sound 2 Visible burning gas (5) with little or no distortion (2­ 4 Provocation (3,3) 2) 5 Small openings in the skin 3 Medicinal device (4­4) 9 Proceed (2,5) (5) 10 Port on River Seine (5) 6 Act of avoiding capture (7) 11 Offering little or no hope 7 Declare untrue (4) (5) 8 Judge to be (6) 12 Capital of Texas (6) 14 Rectangular shape (6) 13 Army unit (8) 16 Lacking in quality or 15 Place to keep watch (7) quantity (6) 17 Church officers (6) 19 Not casual (6) 18 Splinter (6) 21 Port city in UAE (5) 24 Egg­shaped (5) 20 Example 25 Long­winded (7) 22 Produce flowers (5) 26 Colonists (8) 23 Signs of agreement (4) 27 Soot (4) Last weeks Solution Across: 8 Evasive, 9 Error, 10 Godparent, 11 Owe, 12 Urge, 13 Swansea, 16 One­step, 19 Lawn, 22 Act, 23 Staircase, 24 Elite, 25 Censure.

Down: 1 Hedge, 2 Wander, 3 Ligament, 4 Repels, 5 Rent, 6 Brooks, 7 Freeman, 14 Alluring, 15 Po­faced, 17 Entail, 18 Plaice, 20 Wrap up, 21 Jewel, 23 Step.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

2 letter words As Ma 3 letter words Amp Cad Eft Elm Ire Lap Nub See 4 letter words Able Agar Arum Bate

Bust Byte Camp Easy Espy Fret Lest Lore Near Ones Oral Pane Peel Pend Pert Pine Pint Polo Pose Race

Rest Rosa Silt Slap Snap Togo Tyre User 5 letter words Acorn Adder Amber Arise Arose Aspic Baggy Belle Butyl Elate

Inner Manse Money Moral Pagan Salsa Saner Satyr Scold Sense Share Shire Soggy Sorry Spelt Stone Stray Trees 6 letter words

Assess Bolero Desert Dieter Eatery Posted Stolen Stress 8 letter words Ceremony Sageness 9 letter words Centenary Summarise

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD

Improve your Spanish ­ clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Chauffeur (6) 4 Sacos (5) 8 Vivo (5) 9 Aged (old) (7) 10 Look out! (7) 11 Largo (pasillo, pelo, uñas) (4) 12 Siesta (3) 14 Último (final) (4) 15 Over there (4) 18 Comer (comida) (3) 21 Laugh (4) 23 Happiness (cheerful­ ness) (7) 25 Work (activity) (7) 26 January (5) 27 Chair (5) 28 Blankets (6)

Down 1 Pond (natural) (6) 2 Office (workplace) (7) 3 Elephant (8) 4 Enfermo (4) 5 Clear (meaning, expla­ nation) (5) 6 Esponja (para el aseo) (6) 7 Bowl (container) (5) 13 Wastepaper basket (8) 16 El más grande (7) 17 Free (for nothing) (6) 19 Garra (de ave) (5) 20 Alcades (6) 22 Caracol (5) 24 Berry (4)

37

Friday, February 21, 2014 Across 1 Piece of cloth put over the back of a chair to pro­ tect it from grease and dirt or as an ornament (12) 10 Word formed from or based on the initial letters or syllables of other words, such as radar (7) 11 Stage name of the American comedian and film and television star Julius Henry Marx (7) 12 Become or make sore by or as if by rubbing (5) 13 ITV comedy drama featuring James Nesbitt, Helen Baxendale, John Thomson and Fay Ripley, which ran from 1998 to 2003? (4,4) 15 Variety of white wine grape used for making champagne and other wines (10) 16 Male monarch or emperor, especially of Russia prior to 1917 (4) 18 First name of the

nightclub owner character played by Humphrey Bogart in the 1942 film Casablanca? (4) 20 A port and largest city in Louisiana (3,7) 22 Instrument for meas­ uring the distance travelled by a wheeled vehicle (8) 24 Person who holds extreme views (5) 26 Ancient jar with two handles and a narrow neck, used to hold oil or wine (7) 27 North central region of the United States, some­ times called the heartland or the breadbasket of America (7) 28 Make a great deal of noise, especially through cheering (5,3,4) Down 2 American rock band formed by singer/guitarist Kurt Cobain and bassist Krist Novoselic in Aberdeen, Washington in

SUDOKU (Easy)

Quiz Word

1987 (7) 3 Fourteenth studio album by Queen, released in February 1991, featuring

the UK hit singles I'm Going Slightly Mad, Headlong and The Show Must Go On (8) 4 Something given to the

poor as charity, such as money, clothing or food (4) 5 Relating to or denoting the Germanic inhabitants of England from their arrival in the fifth century up to the Norman Conquest (5­5) 6 Ornamental hairnet or fabric bag worn over the hair at the back of a woman's head (5) 7 Disease of children caused by vitamin D defi­ ciency, characterised by imperfect calcification, soft­ ening and distortion of the bones typically resulting in bow legs (7) 8 Army rank of local butcher Jack Jones (Clive Dunn) in Dad’s Army (5,8) 9 Service offered by a post office whereby mail is kept for an agreed period until collected by the addressee, from the French for 'mail remaining' (5,8) 14 Having a particular habit, activity or interest that

is long­established and unlikely to change (10) 17 Small flatfish that typi­ cally occurs in shallow coastal water (8) 19 Type of motorcycle with high handlebars and the front­wheel fork extend­ ed forwards (7) 21 Predominant decora­ tive art style of the 1920s and 1930s, characterised by precise and boldly delin­ eated geometric shapes and strong colours and used most notably in house­ hold objects and in architec­ ture (3,4) 23 Bacterium commonly found in the intestines of humans and other animals, some strains of which can cause severe food poison­ ing (1,4) 25 Name for a woman employed to look after chil­ dren in India, derived from Portuguese for ‘nurse’ (4)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH

Desastres Naturales Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch.

(Answers below)

geography QUIZ

ANSEWRS:1. Alaska 2. Mojave 3. The Urals 4. North America 5. Waterloo 6. "France, Belgium and Germany" 7.

Manilla 8. The Rocky Mountains 9. Maryland 10. Cornwall 11. It Was The World's First Steel Suspension Bridge 12.

"Core, Mantle, Crust" 13. Ujiji On The Shores Of Lake Tanganyika 14. Montreal

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Word Solution Across: 9 Welsh, 10 Crescendo, 11 Sirocco, 12 Pancake, 13 Blair, 15 Gun, 16 Can, 17 God, 19 Brazier, 20/23 Dry ice, 25 Shank, 27 Prussia, 29 Cronies, 32 Euripides, 33 Aorta.

Down: 1 Owls, 2 Gloria, 3 Chic, 4 Echo, 5 Serpentine, 6 Icon, 7 Unmanned, 8 Bolero, 13/24 Big toe, 14 Ruble, 15 Giant panda, 16 Curds, 18 Daiquiri, 21 Yak, 22 Gopher, 26 Apiary, 28 Sips, 29 Cusp, 30 Oval, 31 Spam.

la deforestación

el huracán

la erupción

el incendio

la lluvia acida

el relámpago

la sequia

el terremoto

las inundaciones

el tornado

la tormenta

el tsunami

la ventisca

el volcán

un derrumbe

la avalancha Empareja estas palabras ­ Match the Spanish and English words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz.

1.el humo, 2.el huracán,

14.las inundaciones,

i.the fire, j.the hurricane,

3.el incendio, 4.el relámpago,

15.la tormenta, 16.la ventisca,

k.the drought, l.the eruption,

5.el terremoto, 6.el tornado,

17.un derrumbe.

m.the tsunami, n.the tornado, o.the avalanche, p.the acid rain,

7.el tsunami, 8.el volcán, 9.la avalancha,

a.the floods, b.the deforestation,

10.la deforestación,

c.the storm, d.a landslide,

11.la erupción, 12.la lluvia

e.the lightning, f.the smoke,

acida., 13.la sequia,

g.the earthquake, h.the blizzard,

Soduko

Span ­ Eng

Quizword

q.the volcano.

Answers: 1f, 2j, 3i, 4e, 5g, 6n, 7m, 8q, 9o, 10b, 11l, 12p, 13k, 14a, 15c, 16h, 17d.

1. What is the largest state in the USA? 2. Name the desert located in south­east California.?

3. What Mountain Range Separates Europe & Asia?

4. In which continent would you find the Mississippi River?

5. From which London Station Do Trains To The Channel Tunnel Leave From?

6. Which three countries border Luxembourg?

7. Which City Is The Capital Of The Philippines?

8. In Which Mountain Range Is The Ski Resort Of Aspen?

9. The Mason­Dixon line separates Pennsylvania and what State?

10. In which county is the market town of St Austell?

11. What Was So Special About Brooklyn Bridge?

12. What Are The 3 Components Called That Form The Earth?

13. Where Was Henry Stanley When He Uttered The Phrase (Dr Livingstone I Presume)?

14. what major city is on an island in the St Lawrence river?

el humo

Fill It In

38

Friday, February 21, 2014

TRELI ON THE TELLY

WAS BENIDORM FLOURISH TOO LATE? appearances from The Krankies (who looked like they were in second­stage rigor mortis) and old TV AM cook Rustie Lee who hasn’t changed a bit in the last one If you stuck with Benidorm hundred years. The thrust of right through to the last the instalment was all about episode of a disappointing relationships and it actually series last week, you were worked. It also served to well rewarded. increase the frustration as to Some of the old flavour how uneven (putting it kindly) returned led by a great the rest of the series was. cameo from Joan Collins and

with ALEX TRELINSKI

Please please Tiger Aspect productions, who make the show for ITV, just sort out a good script for next year, which I think may well be the last clutch of episodes.

q

I love PR­speak, espe­ cially when it gets repeated over and over again. The BBC Press Office are specialists at it, and when Ripper Street was can­ celled, a statement appeared If Michael Parkinson saying how brilliant it was but was dead, he’d have it was being “pulled” to make been turning in his grave, way for new dramas. Guess and then sliding open his cof­ what? The Paradise has suf­ fin lid, if he’d tuned into last fered the same fate after two Friday’s Graham Norton series, with the Beeb’s press Show on BBC1. Alcoholic office saying that it was beverages loosened the “pulled” to make way for new tongues of Matt Damon, Bill dramas! I take it then that Murray, and Hugh New Tricks and Call The Bonneville, and it led to a Midwife will suffer the same fate for exciting new dramas hilarious show, which was a to appear? Of course not, million miles away from because on that stupid Press Parky’s formal fare in years Office logic, there would be gone by. Damon paid Norton no long running series on the the complement of saying it BBC at all! A more honest was the best fun he’d ever statement on The Paradise, had on a talk show, and which was great with series though I virtually learnt noth­ one, would have been that ing about any of the guests, it the second run was a largely was a fabulously fun way of disappointing yawn and that putting it out on a Sunday rounding off a week.

q

night was not a clever idea either, though it still got a very good five million viewers (more incidentally than the re­commissioned Atlantis).

Now a bit of PR honesty like that would have been appre­ ciated, but why should the BBC break the habit of a life­ time?

q

With the useless Splash over, ITV are wheeling out the big guns this week­ end with the return of Ant and Dec’s Saturday Takeaway, with the guys urgently need­ ed as The Voice has run away with the viewers over

BBC1. Also back this Monday night on BBC1 is the excellent legal drama, Silk, and try and catch Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson in a new 8 part series, True Detective on Sky Atlantic. Made by the brilliant US company, HBO (the one’s that brought you The Sopranos, Game of Thrones, Boardwalk Empire, True Blood, etc, etc), critics are saying that this movie­style drama is the best show on US TV at the moment.

There’s nothing like building up expectations!

The Courier Friday TV 00:35 The Color of Money 02:30 Skiing Weatherview 02:35 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Wanted Down Under Revisited 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 The Sheriffs Are Coming 12:45 Saints and Scroungers 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 James Martin: Home Comforts 17:30 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:25 Room 101 20:55 Live Six Nations Rugby Union 23:00 BBC News 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 The Graham Norton Show

00:20 01:20 01:50 02:20 03:20

The Restaurant Man See Hear Panorama This World This Is BBC Two

05:00 Schools: Children at Work 1 ­ Football 05:30 Schools: Speaking Sport 01:35 Jackpot247 06:00 Schools ­ Lilly the 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:45 ITV Nightscreen Magnificent 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 06:15 Loona Balloona 07:00 Daybreak 06:30 The Little Promise 09:30 Lorraine 06:40 Schools ­ My Kite Is Flying 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 06:55 Wonders of Nature: Frogs ­ 11:30 This Morning Diversity 13:30 Loose Women 07:00 This Is BBC Two 14:30 ITV News and Weather 07:20 The Great Interior Design 14:55 ITV News Meridian Challenge 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 08:20 Torvill & Dean: The Perfect 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show Day 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 09:20 Lifeline 17:00 Tipping Point 09:30 Live Winter Olympics 18:00 The Chase 13:00 Live Winter Olympics 19:00 ITV News Meridian 17:30 Live Winter Olympics 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Winter Olympics: Today at 20:00 Emmerdale the Games 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Mastermind 21:00 Student Nurses: Bedpans and Bandages 21:30 An Island Parish 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Mock the Week Looks Back 22:00 Edge of Heaven at 23:00 ITV News at Ten and 22:30 QI Weather 23:00 Alan Davies Apres­Ski 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:30 Newsnight 23:35 The Americans

EDGE OF HEAVEN Comedy drama set in a 1980s­themed B&B in Margate. Run by Wham! fan Judy Taylor­ Chatterjee, the guest house is also home to her husband ­ chef Tandeep ­ and her two grown­up children, sofa salesman Alfie and ex­soldier Ann­ Marie. Alfie has his life in the Kent resort planned out ahead of him, until his fiancee Carly leaves him at the altar.

Starring Blake Harrison, Camille Coduri, Nitin Kundra, Laura Checkley and Justine Cain.

00:00 24 Hours in A&E 01:00 One Born Every Minute 02:00 Random Acts 02:05 First Dates 03:00 Dispatches 03:30 Benefits Street 04:00 Scandimania 04:55 Location, Location, Location 05:50 Deal or No Deal 06:45 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 07:15 Kirstie's Handmade Treasures 07:25 Countdown 08:10 Will & Grace 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:30 Frasier 12:00 The Big Bang Theory 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 Celebrity Come Dine with Me: Ireland 15:40 Countdown 16:30 Deal or No Deal 17:30 Come Dine with Me 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Superstar Dogs: Countdown to Crufts 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 21:00 Extreme Dog Styling 22:00 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 23:00 The Last Leg 23:50 Brooklyn Nine­Nine

February 21

00:00 Extraordinary People 01:00 SuperCasino 04:05 Holiday Love Rats Exposed 05:00 House Doctor 05:45 Great Scientists 06:10 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olly the Little White Van 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Police Interceptors 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Benidorm ER 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Recipe for Murder 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 World's Fastest Train 21:00 Ice Road Truckers 22:00 Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild 23:00 Navy SEALs

39

The Courier Saturday TV

February 22

02:05 Question Time 00:25 Pound Shop Wars

03:05 Hidden Kingdoms 04:05 This Is BBC Two

00:55 EastEnders

07:00 The Little Polar Bear 2

02:50 Weatherview

08:15 The Magic Box

02:55 BBC News

10:00 Live Winter Olympics

07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live

12:30 Escape to the Country 13:00 Flog It! Trade Secrets

12:30 Food & Drink 13:00 BBC News; Regional News

13:30 Live Winter Olympics 17:00 Live Winter Olympics

and Weather

17:50 Final Score

13:15 Football Focus 14:00 Live Six Nations Rugby

18:05 Live Winter Olympics 18:35 Final Score

Union 16:30 Live Six Nations Rugby

19:00 Live Winter Olympics 20:10 Winter Olympics: Today at the

Union 18:55 BBC News; Regional News

Games 21:00 Top Gear

and Weather 19:15 Pointless Celebrities

22:00 The Culture Show 23:00 QI XL

20:00 The Voice UK 21:30 The National Lottery: Who Dares Wins 22:20 Casualty 23:10 BBC News; Weather 23:30 National Lottery Update 23:30 Match of the Day

00:00 Weather 00:05 Synecdoche, New York"

23:45 There Will Be Blood

00:40 The Chase 01:30 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Dino Dan 07:25 Matt Hatter Chronicles 07:45 Canimals 08:10 Om Nom Stories 08:20 Sooty 08:30 Scrambled!

10:25 ITV News 10:30 Dinner Date 11:30 Murder, She Wrote 12:30 ITV News and Weather 12:39 ITV Meridian Weather 12:40 The Crocodile Hunter Diaries 13:10 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 14:05 Casino Royale 16:35 Midsomer Murders 18:35 ITV News Meridian 18:45 ITV News and Weather 19:00 The Cube 20:00 Ant & Dec's Saturday Night Takeaway 21:20 Take Me Out 22:50 The Jonathan Ross Show 23:50 ITV News and Weather

00:20 The Naked Gun 21/2: the Smell of Fear 01:50 The Simpsons 02:15 Random Acts 02:20 According to Jim 02:45 Happy Endings 03:30 Franklin & Bash 04:15 Boss 05:10 Location, Location, Location 06:05 Deal or No Deal 07:00 SuperScrimpers 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Trans World Sport 09:00 The Morning Line 10:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:30 Frasier 11:35 The Big Bang Theory 12:30 How I Met Your Mother 13:25 The Simpsons 14:30 Channel 4 Racing 17:10 Come Dine with Me 19:15 Superstar Dogs: Countdown to Crufts 19:45 Channel 4 News 20:00 The Restoration Man 21:00 Walking Through History 22:00 Hostages 22:55 Transporter 3

ANT & DEC'S SATURDAY NIGHT TAKEAWAY New series. The Geordie duo return with the enter­ tainment show, featuring undercover pranks, sketches, famous guests and competitions. This Morning's Eamonn Holmes and Ruth Langsford take part in I'm a Celebrity Get Out of Me Ear, Little Ant and Dec mix with Hollywood A­listers at the Baftas and Michael Buble provides the voiceover and end­of­show performance.

01:15 SuperCasino 04:05 Trauma Doctors 05:00 House Doctor 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Olly the Little White Van 07:10 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:20 Bubble Guppies 07:35 The Mr Men Show 07:45 Chloe's Closet 07:55 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:05 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:20 Make Way for Noddy 08:40 City of Friends 08:55 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Jelly Jamm 10:30 LazyTown 11:00 Access 11:15 Paul Blart: Mall Cop 13:00 Sabrina 15:25 Diagnosis Murder 16:25 Columbo: A Bird in the Hand 18:20 Columbo: the Most Crucial Game 19:40 5 News Weekend 19:45 NCIS 20:30 NCIS 21:30 NCIS 23:10 Nora Roberts' Midnight Bayou

The Courier Sunday TV

February 23

23:00 BBC News; Regional News 00:55 The Football League Show 02:15 Weatherview

and Weather 23:25 Match of the Day 2

02:20 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 08:30 Match of the Day 10:00 The Andrew Marr Show 11:00 The Big Questions 12:00 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 13:15 MOTD2 Extra 14:00 BBC News 14:10 Weather for the Week Ahead 14:15 Bargain Hunt 15:15 The Indian Doctor 15:55 Flog It! Trade Secrets 16:30 Escape to the Country 17:15 Deadly 60 on a Mission 17:45 Songs of Praise 18:20 Pointless Celebrities 19:10 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 19:30 Blandings 20:00 Countryfile 21:00 Call the Midwife 22:00 The Musketeers

02:15 This Is BBC Two 07:00 Bachelor Knight 08:30 Monty Don's Italian Gardens 09:30 Countryfile 10:30 Live Winter Olympics 15:30 Live Winter Olympics 17:00 Live Winter Olympics 20:00 Hunt vs Lauda: F1's Greatest Racing Rivals 21:00 Top Gear 22:00 Dragons' Den 23:00 Alan Davies Apres­Ski 23:30 Line of Duty

00:04 ITV Meridian Weather 00:05 The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift 02:00 Jackpot247 04:00 In Plain Sight 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Dino Dan 07:25 Matt Hatter Chronicles 07:45 Canimals 08:10 Om Nom Stories 08:20 Sooty 08:30 Scrambled!

10:25 Murder, She Wrote 11:20 Dickinson's Real Deal 12:20 ITV News and Weather 12:29 ITV Meridian Weather 12:30 Countrywise 12:45 Inside the National Trust 13:45 Evil under the Sun 16:00 On Her Majesty's Secret Service 18:50 ITV News Meridian 19:00 ITV News and Weather 19:15 Dancing on Ice 20:45 All Star Family Fortunes 21:30 Dancing on Ice: The Skate Off 22:00 Mr Selfridge 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:14 ITV Meridian Weather 23:15 It'll Be Alright on the Night

TOP GEAR That Jack Whitehall – you never really see him much on TV, do you? But for anyone suffering with­ drawal symptoms from the five minutes since the comedian last self­promoted, he’ll be driving the Reasonably Priced Car and chatting with Jeremy Clarkson. Meanwhile, Richard Hammond goes to Abu Dhabi to drive a car aimed at people for whom a 4x4 isn’t quite rugged enough – they need a 6x6.

And James May, with help from the Stig, tests out two models from British sports car maker Caterham.

00:55 Cop Land 02:45 Boss 03:45 One Minute Past Midnight 03:55 One Born Every Minute 04:55 Kirstie's Handmade Treasures 05:00 Hollyoaks 07:10 The Hoobs 08:05 Freesports on 4 08:30 Arenacross 09:00 Frasier 09:25 The Taste 10:30 Sunday Brunch 13:30 The Big Bang Theory 14:30 How I Met Your Mother 15:25 The Simpsons 16:30 Jamie and Jimmy's Friday Night Feast 17:30 Deal or No Deal 18:35 The Devil Wears Prada 20:40 Channel 4 News 21:00 Time Team 22:00 Bridesmaids

01:00 SuperCasino 04:10 Benidorm ER 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Make It Big 05:50 The Funky Valley Show 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:10 Hana's Helpline 06:20 Angels of Jarm 06:30 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bubble Guppies 07:35 The Mr Men Show 07:50 Chloe's Closet 08:00 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:25 Make Way for Noddy 08:35 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 08:40 City of Friends 08:55 Little Princess 09:05 Olly the Little White Van 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:40 Rupert Bear 09:55 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Jelly Jamm 10:30 LazyTown 11:00 Power Rangers Super Samurai 11:35 Power Rangers Megaforce 12:00 Access 12:10 The Dog Rescuers 12:45 The Hotel Inspector 13:45 Ice Road Truckers 14:45 Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild 15:45 The Kid 17:45 Over Her Dead Body 19:35 5 News 19:40 The Man in the Iron Mask 22:00 Daybreakers 23:55 The Matrix Revolutions

40

The Courier Monday TV

February 24

00:35 The Devil's Double 02:15 Weatherview 02:20 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Operation Hospital Food 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 James Martin: Home Comforts 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 20:30 Inside Out 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Panorama 22:00 Silk 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Have I Got Old News for You

00:30 01:45 03:50 04:45 05:45 07:00 07:05

Of Time and the City Silkwood Countryfile Holby City This Is BBC Two This Is BBC Two Homes Under the Hammer

08:05 The Sheriffs Are Coming 08:50 Saints and Scroungers 09:20 Helicopter Heroes 00:15 Premiership Rugby Union 10:05 Ben & James Versus the 01:15 The Store Arabian Desert 03:15 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 11:05 Great British Railway 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show Journeys 07:00 Daybreak 11:35 Click 09:30 Lorraine 12:00 BBC News 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 12:30 BBC World News 11:30 This Morning 13:00 Daily Politics 13:30 Loose Women 14:00 Instant Restaurant 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:45 Andrew Marr's The Making of 14:55 ITV News Meridian Modern Britain 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 15:45 Cagney & Lacey 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 16:30 Bergerac 17:00 Tipping Point 17:20 Are You Being Served?

18:00 The Chase 17:50 'Allo 'Allo!

19:00 ITV News Meridian 18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:30 ITV News and Weather 19:00 Revenge of the Egghead 20:00 Emmerdale 19:30 Great Continental Railway 20:30 Coronation Street Journeys 21:00 A Great Welsh Adventure with 20:00 Top Gear Griff Rhys Jones 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 Coronation Street 21:30 Food & Drink 22:00 DCI Banks 22:00 Horizon 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:00 The Culture Show 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:30 Newsnight 23:35 The Agenda 23:30 Weather

00:25 Sex and the City: the Movie 02:55 Boss 03:55 One Born Every Minute 04:55 Location, Location, Location 05:50 Supernanny US 06:30 Deal or No Deal 07:25 Countdown 08:10 Will & Grace 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:30 Frasier 12:05 The Big Bang Theory 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 Four in a Bed 15:40 Countdown 16:30 Deal or No Deal 17:30 Come Dine with Me 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Superstar Dogs: Countdown to Crufts 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 Paralympic Winter Games ­ The Countdown 21:00 Dispatches 21:30 Food Unwrapped 22:00 One Born Every Minute 23:00 8 Out of 10 Cats 23:50 Troy

THE GADGET SHOW The programme is back to review the latest techno­ logical devices on the market, with Ortis Deley returning to the presenting team. Jon Bentley meets up with former Beatles photographer Paul Beriff to test three digital cameras, while Matt Littler and Darren Jeffries try out portable games con­ soles. Ortis visits the Italian Institute of Technology in Genoa and Jason Bradbury and Rachel Riley build a gadget­protection device to keep thieves at bay.

02:15 SuperCasino 04:05 Ultimate Emergency Bikers 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Make It Big 05:50 The Funky Valley Show 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:10 Hana's Helpline 06:20 Angels of Jarm 06:30 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olly the Little White Van 07:55 Milkshake! Monkey 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Police Interceptors 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Ultimate Emergency Bikers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:20 NCIS 16:15 Chinese Food in Minutes 16:20 McBride: Fallen Idol 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 The Gadget Show 21:00 Police Interceptors 22:00 Can't Pay? We'll Take It Away!

23:00 Criminals: Caught on Camera

The Courier Tuesday TV

February 25

00:20 BBC News: The Editors 00:50 The Graham Norton Show 01:35 Weatherview 01:40 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Operation Hospital Food 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 James Martin: Home Comforts 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Holby City 22:00 Death in Paradise 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:35 Traffic Cops

00:20 Dragons' Den 01:20 Film 2014 01:50 Animal Odd Couples 02:50 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools ­ Made of Money 05:30 Schools ­ The World, My Stuff and Me 06:00 Jirka and the White Mice 06:10 Graffiti Detective 06:25 Loona Balloona

06:40 Jona's Ark 06:55 Bringing Books to Life 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Countryside 999 08:50 Caught Red Handed 09:20 Helicopter Heroes 10:05 Great British Garden Revival 11:05 Great British Railway Journeys 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Instant Restaurant 14:45 Andrew Marr's The Making of Modern Britain 15:45 Cagney & Lacey 16:30 Bergerac 17:20 Are You Being Served?

17:50 'Allo 'Allo!

18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Revenge of the Egghead 19:30 Great Continental Railway Journeys 20:00 The Planners 21:00 The Great British Sewing Bee 22:00 The Necessary War 23:00 QI 23:30 Newsnight 23:30 Weather

00:05 The Mighty Mississippi with Trevor McDonald 01:05 Jackpot247 04:00 Champions League Weekly 04:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 05:10 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Live UEFA Champions League 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:35 UEFA Champions League: Extra Time

STRIPPERS Documentary filmed at strip clubs in Glasgow, Edinburgh and Aberdeen, revealing how exotic dancers handle the stigma attached to their pro­ fession. The first programme follows the girls of Diamond Dolls in Glasgow as they learn to juggle love, life and lap dancing, including Laefena, who has come to the UK to earn enough money to pay off her debts from her nursing degree.

00:50 BodyShock 01:50 Random Acts 01:55 Scandal 02:45 Hostages 03:35 Boss 04:35 Paralympic Winter Games ­ The Countdown 04:40 Supernanny US 05:25 Location, Location, Location 06:20 Kirstie's Vintage Gems 06:30 Deal or No Deal 07:20 Countdown 08:05 Paralympic Winter Games ­ The Countdown 08:10 Will & Grace 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:30 Frasier 12:00 The Big Bang Theory 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 Four in a Bed 15:40 Countdown 16:30 Deal or No Deal 17:30 Come Dine with Me 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Superstar Dogs: Countdown to Crufts 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 Paralympic Winter Games ­ The Countdown 21:00 Kirstie's Best of Both Worlds 22:00 The Taste 23:00 Strippers

00:00 Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery 02:00 SuperCasino 05:00 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olly the Little White Van 07:55 Milkshake! Monkey 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Police Interceptors 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Trauma Doctors 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:20 NCIS 16:15 The Shell Seekers 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 The Dog Rescuers 20:30 5 News Update 20:30 Police 5 21:00 Benidorm ER 22:00 The Mentalist 23:00 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

41

The Courier Wednesday TV

February 26

00:35 Who Do You Think You Are? USA 01:20 Weatherview 01:25 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Operation Hospital Food 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 James Martin: Home Comforts 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 BBC London News 19:30 Weather 20:00 The One Show 21:00 Waterloo Road 22:00 Outnumbered 22:30 Mrs Brown's Boys 23:00 BBC News 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 A Question of Sport

00:20 01:20 02:05 03:05 05:00 05:30 05:45 05:55

Horizon The Super League Show Britain's Great War This Is BBC Two Schools ­ L8R Youngers 3 Ask Lara Ask Lara Schools ­ Lizard Girl

06:10 Schools ­ Found 06:25 What Makes Me, Me 06:55 Bringing Books to Life 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Countryside 999 08:45 Caught Red Handed 09:15 Helicopter Heroes 10:00 Nature's Weirdest Events 11:00 An Island Parish 11:30 See Hear 12:00 BBC News 12:30 Daily Politics 14:00 Instant Restaurant 14:45 Andrew Marr's The Making of Modern Britain 15:45 Cagney & Lacey 16:30 Bergerac 17:20 Are You Being Served?

17:50 'Allo 'Allo!

18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Revenge of the Egghead 19:30 Great Continental Railway Journeys 20:00 The Planners 21:00 The Restaurant Man 22:00 Line of Duty 23:00 Inside No 9 23:30 Weather 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 01:30 04:00 04:45 06:05 07:00 09:30 10:25 11:30 13:30 14:30 14:55 15:00 16:00 16:59 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 23:20 23:50 23:55

Sports Life Stories Jackpot247 Loose Women ITV Nightscreen The Jeremy Kyle Show Daybreak Lorraine The Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather ITV News Meridian Dickinson's Real Deal The Alan Titchmarsh Show ITV Meridian Weather Tipping Point The Chase ITV News Meridian ITV News and Weather Emmerdale Coronation Street Live FA Cup Football ITV News and Weather ITV News Meridian FA Cup Highlights

00:05 8 Out of 10 Cats 00:50 Random Acts 00:55 Poker 01:55 KOTV Boxing Weekly 02:20 Trans World Sport 03:20 Beach Volleyball 04:15 Freesports on 4 04:40 Arenacross 05:05 Paralympic Winter Games ­ The Countdown 05:10 Terror in the Skies 06:05 SuperScrimpers 06:25 Secret Removers 07:20 Countdown 08:05 Paralympic Winter Games ­ The Countdown 08:10 Will & Grace 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:30 Frasier 12:00 The Big Bang Theory 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 Four in a Bed 15:40 Countdown 16:30 Deal or No Deal 17:30 Come Dine with Me 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Superstar Dogs: Countdown to Crufts 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 Paralympic Winter Games ­ The Countdown 21:00 The Restoration Man 22:00 24 Hours in A&E 23:00 First Dates

BORN TO KILL? The return of the programme in which experts analyse the personalities and motives of notori­ ous killers, beginning with Wesley Shermantine and Loren Herzog. In 1984, the childhood friends embarked upon a drug­fuelled killing spree that terrorised their rural Californian community for 15 years. Psychologists and criminology experts analyse their motives and examine whether their upbringings contributed to their crimes

00:00 Body of Proof 00:55 CSI: Miami 01:55 SuperCasino 04:10 Henry VIII & Anne: The Lovers Who Changed History 05:00 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olly the Little White Van 07:55 Milkshake! Monkey 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Police Interceptors 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 The Gadget Show 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:20 NCIS 16:15 The Shell Seekers 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Trauma Doctors 21:00 Born to Kill?

22:00 NCIS 23:00 Suspects

The Courier Thursday TV

February 27

00:05 Film 2014 00:35 Blandings 01:05 Weatherview 01:10 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Operation Hospital Food 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 James Martin: Home Comforts 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Pound Shop Wars 21:30 Inspector George Gently 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Question Time

00:20 The Necessary War 01:20 See Hear 01:50 Children's Emergency Rescue 02:50 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools ­ Save Your Energy 05:30 Schools ­ Megabits 06:00 Schools ­ Labrinth's Speak Out 06:55 Schools ­ Wonders of Nature: Damselfly ­ Danger/Safety

07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Countryside 999 08:50 Caught Red Handed 09:20 Helicopter Heroes 10:05 Italy Unpacked 11:05 An Island Parish 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Instant Restaurant 14:45 Andrew Marr's The Making of Modern Britain 15:45 Cagney & Lacey 16:30 Bergerac 17:20 Are You Being Served?

17:50 'Allo 'Allo!

18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Revenge of the Egghead 19:30 Great Continental Railway Journeys 20:00 The Planners 21:00 The Hairy Bikers' Asian Adventure 22:00 Jumbo: The Plane That Changed the World 23:00 Mock the Week Looks Back at 23:30 Newsnight

00:55 The Jonathan Ross Show 01:50 Jackpot247 04:00 Columbo: Lovely but Lethal 05:15 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:15 ITV News and Weather 19:45 Emmerdale 20:45 Live UEFA Europa League Football 23:10 ITV News and Weather 23:40 ITV News Meridian 23:45 Edge of Heaven

THE STORMS THAT STOLE CHRISTMAS Trees were felled, trains were cancelled, Gatwick Airport was in chaos and 50,000 homeowners made do without power. This documentary tells the stories of those who bore the brunt of the bad weather over Christmas 2013 and the surrounding period, featuring amateur footage, eyewitness testimony and expert commentary.

00:00 Bodyshockers 01:00 Random Acts 01:05 Beginners 02:50 The Well 04:20 Paralympic Winter Games ­ The Countdown 04:25 Supernanny US 05:05 Location, Location, Location 06:00 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 06:25 Deal or No Deal 07:20 Countdown 08:05 Paralympic Winter Games ­ The Countdown 08:10 Will & Grace 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:30 Frasier 12:00 The Big Bang Theory 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 Four in a Bed 15:40 Countdown 16:30 Deal or No Deal 17:30 Come Dine with Me 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Superstar Dogs: Countdown to Crufts 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 Paralympic Winter Games ­ The Countdown 21:00 Supersize vs Superskinny 22:00 The Storms That Stole Christmas 23:00 The Repo Man

00:00 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 00:55 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 01:50 SuperCasino 04:10 Extraordinary People 05:00 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olly the Little White Van 07:55 Milkshake! Monkey 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Police Interceptors 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:20 NCIS 16:15 Hunger Point 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Royal Funerals: The Inside Story 21:00 Henry VIII & Anne: The Lovers Who Changed History 22:00 The Hotel Inspector 23:00 Brain Hospital: Saving Lives

42

Friday, February 21, 2014

and German.

Call Professional Business Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from our friendly staff.

AUCTIONS

PERSONAL

ACCOUNTANTS Pro Business Support – for all your accountancy needs in English; bookkeeping, taxes, wage slips and more.

We cater for companies and self­employed people; we can deal with everything for you. Call us on 966 923 963 for first consultation free of charge.

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES Bar for traspaso Well established, 9 year old, beach front terrace on the Mar Menor, with a good mix of both British and Spanish clientele. Hard working bar.

For more information con­ tact 637 362 863 (157)

CHURCH SERVICES International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja.

Evangelical non­denomina­ tional church. Sunday serv­ ices 11am.

Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm.

Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nation­ alities welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276.

Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3.

Pilar de la Horadada.

Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for

Prayer and Praise and Worship Home groups meet during the week. All wel­ come from any church back­ ground or none. For further information contact PilarChristian.CommunityC hurch@gmail.com 968575417 or 966848806.

Reg No:2009­SG/A The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) meet at 10.00 each Sunday at their Torrevieja meetinghouse in the Torreaguas building on the corner of Rambla Juan Mateo Garcia 104, close to the windmill in Torrevieja, 667 533 597.

The rainbow (spiritual awareness centre) Costa Blanca. Behind Sacos bar el liminar just of the cv 905 Rojales to torrevieja road.

We have a divine service on Sundays at 11am and on wed we hold an evening of clairvoyance at 7.30pm.

Also on Wednesdays there is an open circle at 5.45pm for those wishing to develop there mediumistic skills.

Healing is available by

CATERING

trained and certificated heal­ ers after each meeting. A warm welcome to friends old and new. The mediums for febuary are 2nd Jacqueline Holland hunt, 5th Morag bul­ lock 9th & 12th Sammy Fitzsimons, 16th & 19th David Darnbourgh 23rd Paul Hamnett 26th Debbie Blevins. For further informa­ tion call Trish on 966 844 795 therainbowcentre­ costablanca@gmail.com

FOR SALE A bulk buy of fragrance flame candles, 3 in a box each candle burns for an hour ideal for garden or ter­ race, great seller for mar­ kets or boots even shops, enquires to Glen on 606926437.(158) For sale Mens flip flops ,24 in a carton, great seller with summer coming,24 in a car­ ton, bulk buy available for enquires ring Glen 606926437 (158)

CARS FOR SALE Car insurance quotes – new extra discount on fully com­ prehensive policies at the price of third party!

Excellent prices for expats, all policies and call centre staff in English. We will call you back with a quote. 966 923 963

INSURANCE CASER SEGUROS your insurance home, car, health, Policies available in

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PROPERTY FOR RENT Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.vil­ laandvacation.com or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 2 or 3 bed / 2 bath apart­ ments in San Miguel. Lift, communal rooftop pool & solarium, video entry sys­ tem. Available for short or long term rent from 350 pcm. Tel 966723437 or 616 493 487. (148) Ref: 61, A lovely two bed­ roomed ground floor apart­ ment, located in the centre of the small Spanish town of Los Montesinos, With a pleasant communal swim­ ming pool adjacent & all amenities in walking dis­ tance. Long and short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

CARPENTER

ALARMS

Ref: 104, 2 Bedroom apart­ ment in Torrevieja, (near gypsy lane), small balcony, near all amenities and Friday market. €350pcm Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bed­ room detached villa with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near Guardamar. Convenient for all amenities, shops, super­ market, restaurants and bars. Short term rental avail­ able. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situated in Molino Blanco. The property overlooks a superb commu­ nal pool area, in within walk­ ing distance of bars, restau­ rants and shops. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

LONG TERM RENTALS WANTED! Properties, all types, in the Torrevieja area wanted for long term rentals.

Call us on 96 692 3963

PROPERTY FOR SALE

Garage to side of house.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Opportunity to purchase at the off plan price of 195.000 euros. Large 4 Bed, 3 Bath Brand new property. Secure underground parking for 2 cars and communal pool.

Situated opposite Gran Alacant and over looks pro­ jected golf course. Ref No. K52. 627 711 155 Rare opportunity to pur­ chase on Mediterrania III, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, Private Parking, F/Furnished, Large communal pools & Tennis courts S/W facing, Dramatically reduced for quick sale to 126.000 euros.

Ref No. K58 Call 627 711 155 for immediate viewing Lovely Corner property in Novamar V, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms Being sold fully furnished including appliances, Has secure underground parking and faces large oasis com­ munal pool. Walking dis­ tance to beach. 139.000 Euros, Call 627 711 155 and quote Ref No. K10 Don Pueblo, Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms,

CAR HIRE

Ground Floor Duplex, on the Monte y Mar estate of Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 1 Bathroom, Fully furnished, Private Parking, Communal pool Ref. GA0094 NOw only 83.000e Tel. 680333242 Ref: KP3100, €183,000.

Three bedroom, two bath­ room detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool.

CLEANERS

43

Friday, February 21, 2014 Large Kitchen with Galleria, Secure underground park­ ing, Gas Central Heating, Glazed in Porch, Solarium with stunning views.

Viewings absolutely essen­ tial. Very large property at reduced price of 190.000 euros. Ref No. K38 Call 627 711 155 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.com Immaculate ground floor Duplex, 2 beds, 2 bath, Private Parking, Situated in Novamar, Gran Alacant.

Price includes very tasteful furniture and white goods.

Walking distance to all local amenities and beach. Now only 129,750 euros. Ref No K24. 627 711 155 Ref: 78, €110,000. Three bedroom Quad in Jardin Del Mar VII. There is off­road

parking and small storage shed in the enclosed garden area, communal pool near­ by. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 2 Bed, 1 Bath Ground floor duplex. Central heating, Grills, Fully furnished, Glazed in Galleria, 2 com­ munal pools, private parking and walking distance to the Gran Alacant commercial centre. Situated in the popu­ lar urbanisation of Puerto Marino. Now only 96,500 euros for quick sale Ref No. K46. 627 711 155 Recently reduced 4 Bed, 3 Bath Villa, in Gran Alacant.

Quiet Location, Exceptional Views. Converted Under build, 2 Lounges, 2 Kitchens, Private Garage and being sold Fully Furnished, now only 239.950 Ref: L81 Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant Detached villa, located in a very sought after location.Situated on a 560m2 S/W facing plot and

CAR BREAKERS

constructed in 2005.

Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms (2 full baths), Lounge­Diner, fully equipped Kitchen, Porch and Solarium with Alicante & Sea Views. ref.L81. €258,000 neg.

Tel. 680333242 Corner Plot Property in the lower end of Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Under build, Roof top Solarium Being sold Fully Furnished including White goods. Walking distance to all local amenities. 139.950e Ref. GA0087 Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant Town House with a difference.

2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Quiet Location, Extra storage areas, and South Facing Private Pool as well as 2 communal pools. Fully Furnished, All mod cons.

Greenland Views and all local amenities close by.

Ref. No L79. 179.000 euros 680 333 242

Gran Alacant immaculate villa, 3 bedroomed, 3 bath­ roomed property maintained to a very high standard inside and out and the interi­ or furnishings are top quali­ ty, offering a feeling of luxury and good taste. The plot size is 400m2 and has been beautifully tiles, and grav­ eled and has established palms and plants. Oil fired central heating throughout, log effect fire place, ceiling fans in all rooms, towel heater rails, glazed in show­ er units, instant hot water, water purifier, free English TV, phone & internet lines, fitted double hanging wardrobes, safe, glazed in front porch, vanity units and much more. The pool is an 8 X 4 m2 salt water pool, meaning maintenance is much easier plus outside toilet and shower. Sea views to front with Greenland views to the rear. ref K51. €245,000 Tel 680333242

DRAINAGE

Ref: 520, €72,000. Two bed­ room apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed­in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large commu­ nal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 104 Lovely 2 Bedroom Apartment, close to Shops, walking distance to Friday Market and Town Centre and the beach. The property is close to the Habaneres Shopping Centre and Aquapark. Recently refur­ bished apartment in a good central location.

Conveniently situated for all the facilities of this modern vibrant town, and only a few blocks away from Torreviejas excellent sea front with its abundant cafes, restaurants and shops. Price €43950 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant, Situated in the "Alto" part of Gran Alacant, this 3 bedroomed,

4th floor apartment, offers luxury accommodation, with absolutely stunning sea views, as well as views of Alicante bay and the famous Santa Barbara Castle.The apartment is 89 square meters with open plan kitchen / living room and includes all electrical appli­ ances & furniture also there is a utility room, open ter­ race, and private parking.

The urbanisation also offers many communal pools, ten­ nis courts, restaurants and bars. Ref. K20 €109,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant villa located in a very quiet area , situated at the end of a cul­de­sac means there is no through traffic.3 bed, 3 bath, 330m2 plot, established large gar­ dens, working fireplace, solar panel for hot water,pri­ vate parking, south facing great views, fully furnished, fantastic opportunity. ref.

L85. €215,000 Tel 680333242

PETS

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Friday, February 21, 2014

Beach front Line property, over looks Carabassi Beach, Gran Alacant. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Secure Underground Parking, Fully furnished, Roof Top Solarium. 3 Large Communal Pools, Fantastic communal Gardens, Tennis Courts and much more.

125.000 Euros Ref No. K23.

Tel. 627 711 155 Ref: 709, €60,000 A lovely 1 bedroom apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach.

There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Limited Edition Fortaleze in Gran Alacant Exceptionally Large Plot. 4 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Large Private Pool with Decorative Garden, Private Parking, Electric Gates, Glazed in Porch, Solarium, Under build. Quiet sought after area. Very tastefully fur­ nished and all included 370.000e Ref. K52 Tel. 627711155 Gran Alacant, Situated front line to the famous blue flag beaches of Carabassi, the real beauty of this property is its proximity to the beach, but also on offer is a fantas­ tic communal pool situated

in beautifully kept gardens with little Spanish walk ways.Comprising of 2 bed­ rooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge diner, American style kitchen including all appliances, roof top solarium with stunning views, front porch area with front garden and a secure underground garage. fully furnished Ref. K23 €125,000 rare opportunity Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant limited edition villa, not very often available on the market. Only a few of this type were ever con­ structed­ Very large 5 bed­ rooms, 4 bathroom(2 en­ suit) property, situated on a large corner plot with a 10 x 5 private pool and private parking. Lounge­diner with working fireplace, fully equipped kitchen with utility room. Large landing area, leading onto solarium, with extra storage external room.

Front porch area leading into large well established gardens with irrigation sys­ tem and fruit trees. Being sold fully furnished. Within walking distance to Gran Alacant commercial centre and 5 minute drive to Carabassi beaches. ref.

K11. €270,000 Tel 680333242 Ref: 516, €23,950. Studio apartment in San Luis, close

to amenities. Open plan fully equipped kitchen. Good sized lounge, bedroom and out onto balcony which has been glazed to create another room. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Lovely clean detached Villa just as you enter Gran Alacant. Very central loca­ tion, 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Garden Shed, Private Parking, Attractive Gardens, Private pool Ref: K59 240.000e Tel. 627711155 Large 4 Bedroom, 4 Bathroom, 2 Kitchens, 2 Lounges, 600m2+ plot Large Retractable Glazed in Pool for all year swimming, Private Parking for 4 cars, Very low­maintenance, Fully Furnished. 330.000e but Negotiable. Very different to the other properties in Gran Alacant and is disabled friendly Ref: L80 Tel. 680333242 Mid Terraced Townhouse on Avda Polognia, Gran Alacant Furnished to a very high standard and includes White Goods. 3 Bed, 2 Bath, Lounge Diner, Fully convert­ ed Under build offering a second lounge and large storage area. Roof top Solarium, Glazed in galleria with extended worktops.

Front Garden with BBQ, Communal Pool with Gardens. 132.000e Ref. K16 Tel. 627711155 Semi­Detached Villa with Open Greenland Views to the Rear and Alicante Views

to the Front, means this property in Gran Alacant would appeal to anybody looking for a quiet location.

Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Lounge diner, with working Fire place, Porch, Solarium, Established Gardens and Private Pool, Private Parking on a large plot.

265.000e Ref. L95 Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant, detached villa in desirable road close to all amenities, comprising of 3 double bedrooms, 3 baths, lounge diner with working fire place, brand new kitchen with all appliances and black granite work tops, private pool, plot of 550m2, established irrigated gar­ dens and fruit trees, private parking, solarium, also there is a converted under build giving more bedrooms ,bathroom & kitchen, this house has many extras and is being sold fully furnished.

Ref.k47. €280,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant large detached villa with 3 double bed­ rooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge­diner, fully equipped kitchen, large porch, roof top solarium, 400 m2 Plot, with established low mainte­ nance very private gardens with irrigation system, elec­ tronic gates, private parking, outside wc, sink & shower, terraces, air con ( h & c ), mosquito nets, grills, alarmed, large spa pool with separate Jacuzzi section.

REMOVALS

Within easy walking dis­ tance to Gran Alacant com­ mercial centre and close to local bus and tram route.

Ref K33. €260,000 neg Tel 680333242 Offers Invited on a mid Terraced Town house in Gran Alacant. Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Lounge Diner, Galleria, Solarium, Under build.

Communal Pool and Gardens, and with Exceptional Views of Alicante. Being Sold Fully Furnished including White Goods. Ref. K42 Tel. 627711155 (reasonable offers only) 2 Bedroom, 2 Bathroom, Unfurnished Mid Terraced Townhouse in GA. Recently decorated throughout means this property is a very clean black canvass.

Has Air­Con & Security Grills and the use of a Communal Pool. Price recently reduced to 110.000e Ref.K12 Tel. 627711155 Reduced for a quick sale to 95.000 e 2 Bedroom, 1 bath­ room, Top Floor Duplex in Gran Alacant. Very Modern Property with Many extras.

Glazed in Porch, Roof Top Solarium, Wooden Flooring.

Immaculate condition and ready to move in. Ref. K15 Tel. 627711155.

Gran Alacant, Situated on the very first urbanisation as you enter Gran Alacant, this 2nd floor duplex offers taste and quality. Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, lounge­diner, independent kitchen, full roof­top solari­ um with superb views and recently glazed in porch offering extra living area as well as extra privacy as the glass is mirrored. Ref.K44 €108,000 Tel 680333242

WANTED

Gran Alacant south­facing, very private villa, with wood­ land and Alicante views.

Situated at the end of a small cul­de­sac which means this villa enjoys a very peaceful location.3 Bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 3 Bathrooms, lounge­diner with working fireplace, fully fitted kitchen with including white goods, large front porch, solarium,workshop and stor­ age in under build, central heating, air con H/C, ceiling fans, grills, UK T.V, off road parking and plenty of out­ side parking also. Due to its orientation of this property enjoys full sun, all day, something very important in the winter months. Ref.K24. €237,000 Tel 680333242

QUIZZES Experienced quiz­ master/question setter with personality available to host quiz nights in local bars.

Tel:­ 664 838 581

SITUATIONS VACANT RADIO COSTA INTERNA­ TIONAL needs motivated sellers. Spanish, English and German language is a bonus but not essential.

Training and good earnings guaranteed. For more info call 644 126 600 or email info@radicocostainterna­ tional.com Mechanic / tyre fitter fully experienced wanted for Torrevieja garage. Tel 602 625 181

SOLICITORS Need English speaking solicitors in Torrevieja? Let us help to solve your prob­ lems with debt recovery, divorce, property, fraud, criminal defence. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your specialist solicitor today

WIG SPECIALIST

POOLS

SURVEYOR

PLUMBERS

POOL TABLES

SALON MARGARETHAS, 23 years in Torrevieja Hair/Wig specialist for Medical illness and Hair Loss problems. We offer dif­ ferent Hair Replacements, top fillers, Hair prostheses, Toupees and Wigs, Natural and Artificial hair and much more. Also fashion/festival accessories TV/TS are wel­ come to our service. Please call our salon reception for an appointment with Margaretha on Tel no 966 921 846 Torrevieja (90)

VAN HIRE

Friday, February 21, 2014

Greenside Gossip

45

IVIE DAVIES takes a weekly look at the golf scene - golfdavies@gmail.com

GOLF’S GREATEST GAFFES In my recent look at some major Rule Errors by some of the top touring Pros, my mind started to wonder and think about some of the biggest gaffes over the years, and I have to admit that there are plenty to go at! So for your delectation, here are five of my most outstanding foul­ups over the years, and perhaps you may even have some better ones that you can let me know about?

Ian Woosnam

down their scores, correctly, on scorecards that had their names on them. This was a violation of the rules that could result in each of them being disqualified. The scorecards were checked over by officials in the scorer's room after the round and initially there was no problem. The Royal and Ancient said that if the mistake were caught in the scorer's room, it could have been rectified, but once the cards were signed, they became official. Upon further review, the play­ ers were disqualified.

The seeming injustice of the situation prompted the R & A to change the rule and allow such scorecards to stand. But not until after the tournament, so it didn't help Roe at all. He never contended in a national championship again.

Michelle Wie

The rules of golf limit a player to 14 clubs. So why was it that Ian Woosnam, in contention for the 2001 Open at Royal Lytham, ended up with 15 clubs in his bag? Woosnam had been practicing with two drivers on the range before the round. His caddie, Myles Bryne, left both of them in the bag as they went to the practice green for a few putts before tee­ ing off. Then there was a complication. Woosnam and his caddie had gotten their tee time wrong and they were due on the tee almost immediately, so off they went in a rush.

And here's why this particular mistake could only happen at Royal Lytham. The first hole is a par 3, so neither player nor caddy were looking for the driver on the first tee. Woosnam made birdie 2 on the first hole, then Byrne realized as they were going to the second hole that there were two drivers in the bag. It's a two­shot penalty per hole for each hole played with an extra club, so Woosnam had to write down a bogey 4 for the first hole. Woosnam made two bogeys in the next three holes and finished third to David Duval.

Jesper Parnevik and Mark Roe This is yet another score­ card blunder, though like all of them com­ pletely inno­ cent of malice.

Parnevik and Roe were paired together for the third round of the 2003 Open at Royal St. George's. Parnevik was an established touring professional, Roe a career journey­ man.

Roe shot a 67 which put him into contention for the title, but bizarrely he and Parnevik had not exchanged scorecards before the round as the rules required. They were writing

ation didn't buy it and penalised her.

Julie Inkster LPGA veteran Julie Inkster had a brain cramp, in another incident witnessed by a tv viewer. Inkster was involved in the LPGA Safeway Classic at North Plains, Oregon, and was three shots off the lead in the middle of the third round. There was a long backup on the 10th hole, so Inkster reached into her bag and took out a weighted training aid, attached it to her club and started swinging to stay limber. A viewer called, saying that using a training aid during a round of golf was a rules violation, which indeed it is. To confirm it, the LPGA called the USGA, which along with the Royal and Ancient Golf Society of St Andrews gov­ erns the game, and a USGA official confirmed that it was indeed a violation of the rules. Use of a training aid during a round doesn't incur penalty shots; its outright automatic dis­ qualification!

Roberto De Vicenzo Michelle Wie is the most famous female golfer of the new century, and also the most infamous. Wie has a career's worth of blunders in her first six seasons playing as a profes­ sional. She has been star­crossed by the rules of golf, though in truth they are all situations of her own making.

How about being disqualified from her first tournament as a pro in 2005? During the third round of the Samsung World Championship at Palm Desert, California, Wie hit a shot into a bush. After much deliberation about where to take a drop, for which she would incur a penalty of a shot for removing her ball from an unplayable lie, Wie's ball ended up in a spot closer to the hole. The rules officials were told the next day.

After Wie had apparently finished the tournament in fourth place, rules officials informed her of the possible violation, and in an extraordinary move, the officials went back to the scene of the alleged crime, used string to measure where the drop was taken after reviewing a television tape, and determined that she had dropped the ball three inches clos­ er to the hole than would be allowed. Because she did, and because she didn't assess herself a two­shot penalty, she was disqualified.

That was the beginning of a series of rules violations, a kind of golfing version of juvenile delinquency! At the 2006 British Women's Open, she was given a two­stroke penalty after play was completed when officials reviewing a videotape ruled that she had made illegal contact with moss in a bunker during her backswing. In 2008 she neglected to sign her scorecard after the second round of the State Farm Classic.

The oversight wasn't discovered until the next day, and when it was, she was disqualified.

In March 2012, Wie was given a two­stroke penalty for grounding her club in a hazard during the Kia Classic at La Costa, California. She had driven the ball into the verge of a water hazard on the 13th hole. She had grounded her club, she said, to keep her balance before hitting the shot, which is not a violation. But a rules official who observed the situ­

KNOW YOUR RULES

Question: Malcolm hits his ball down the middle of the fairway and he is sure it was a good shot but cannot find his ball. Is Malcolm allowed to drop the ball without penalty where he thinks it came to rest?

A. No. If the ball cannot be found, the player must proceed under Rule 27­1, incurring the stroke­and­distance penalty.

B. Yes. But with one stroke penalty.

C. Yes. Drop a ball where you think it came to rest without penalty.

Answer: A. Under the penalty of one stroke the player must play the ball as near as possible to the spot from which the original ball was last played. Rule 27­1.

Roberto De Vicenzo, the accomplished and respected Argentinean, was one of the world's best players in the 1950s and '60s, and he won The Open in 1967. At the 1968 US Masters, De Vicenzo was in contention on Sunday, and when he made a birdie on the 17th hole, he tied Bob Goalby for the lead. After a par on the 18th, De Vicenzo went to the scorer's table thinking he would meet Goalby in an 18­hole play­off the following day. He routinely signed his scorecard, which was kept by his playing partner Tommy Aaron. But Aaron had made an error, recording a par 4 on the 17th hole instead of the birdie 3 that De Vicenzo had made. The rules of golf don't penalize a player for signing for a higher score than he made, only a lower one, but it makes the higher score official. Once De Vicenzo, who failed to catch the erro­ neous digit, signed his card it became his final score. And he was officially out of the play­off, gifting Goalby the tourna­ ment.

TITTER ON THE TEE A young golfer goes into the confessional box.

“Father I have had sex with two gorgeous 18 year old nymphomaniacs twins every night for the past week” “That’s disgusting, what sought of catholic are you?” asked the priest.

“I’m not a catholic” said the young golfer.

“Then why are you telling me this?”

“I’m telling everyone!”

46

Friday, February 21, 2014

Elche pay the penalty BARCA IN CHARGE ELCHE 0 OSASUNA 0

MANCHESTER CITY 0 BARCELONA 2

Martin Demichelis saw red as Manchester City suffered a 2­0 defeat to Barcelona in the first leg of their Champions League last­16 encounter at the Etihad Stadium on Tuesday. The turning point of the tie arrived nine minutes into the second half as Lionel Elche striker Coro missed a 2nd half penalty which meant that the Ilicitanos had to settle for a draw in a game of few chances, with goalkeepers Antonio Tono and Andres Fernandez both proving equal to what was thrown at them. Osasuna creat­ ed more scoring chances early, with striker Oriol Riera and Lolo both drawing saves from goalkeeper Tono in the first half.

Coro had Elche's best opportunity in the 66th after Emiliano Armenteros fouled

Manuel del Moral in the area. But Coro's spot kick sailed well over the crossbar. Tono left the match because of a leg injury in the 76th, and replacement Manuel Herrera did well to tap a deflected shot over his bar three minutes later to protect his team's point.

Elche now sit on 26 points and are now 5 points above the relegation zone, and face a stiff test away to championship contenders, Real Madrid, tomorrow (Saturday).

Messi was sent sprawling inside the box by Demichelis and dusted himself down to con­ vert from the penalty spot, before Daniel Alves added what could be a crucial second for the Catalan side in the final minute of the 90.

MESSI EYES RECORD BARCELONA 6 RAYO VALLECANO 0

MADRID IN THE MIX GETAFE 0 REAL MADRID 3

Lionel Messi moved into joint third place in the all­time Primera Division scoring charts with a brace as Barcelona demolished Rayo Vallecano, 6­nil. Messi struck in the 36th and 68th minutes of a completely one­sided match at the Nou Camp to move above Alfredo Di Stefano (227) in the record books

and level with another Real Madrid legend, Raul, on 228 La Liga goals. At just 26 years old it now seems only a matter of time before the prolific Messi claims the outright record, which is the 251 goals scored by former Athletic Bilbao star Telmo Zarra. Barcelona are away to Sociedad this Saturday evening.

Torry lose tight affair

Real Madrid kept the pace up with Barcelona and Atletico Madrid at the top of the Primera Division by strolling to a 3­0 vic­ tory at Getafe, thanks to goals by Jese, Karim Benzema and Luka Modric. With both their rivals winning the day before, the pres­ sure was on Carlo Ancelotti's side to pick up the three points from a stadium they had lost at last season, but Jese settled any nerves

they might have had with an early goal.

Benzema doubled their advantage on 27 minutes and midway through the second half Luka Modric got the goal his recent form had merited. The result means Madrid stay level on points with Barcelona and Atletico Madrid at the top of the table, second to the Catalans on goal difference. They entertain Elche this Saturday afternoon.

FC TORREVIEJA 0 ORIHUELA 1

Top Monte march on CALLOSA DEPORTIVA “B” 2 – 3 CD MONTESINOS

CD Montesinos are still unbeaten in 2014 with their latest win at Callosa, with the side having now won five and drawn one from their first six matches this year. The first half looked to be heading towards a goalless draw, but that all changed in four minutes.

First, after 36 minutes, Ruben struck an excellent low shot into the bottom corner of the net after good work out wide by Edu, to give the visitors the lead. Top scorer Vazquinho got on the score sheet heading home from a corner kick after 40 minutes to give Monte a comfortable 0­2 lead at the break.

It took Montesinos just four minutes to

increase their lead in the 2nd half and this time it was young midfielder, Orouker, who struck a thunderbolt from the edge of the area to put his side 0­3 ahead. Callosa struck back straight away, and from a corner kick, Dimitry was judged to have handled the ball inside the area. The referee indicated a penalty which the Callosa forward convert­ ed, having sent Christian the wrong way.

Though Montesinos looked comfortable, Callosa pulled another goal back from a cor­ ner in the 35th minute of the half to set up a nail biting finish. Monte are at home this Sunday to old rivals Benejuzar with a 4.30pm kick­off.

A 59th minute Piñera goal gave Orihuela all 3 points and nothing for FC Torrevieja to show for their brave efforts in Sunday’s derby game at the Vicente Garcia stadium.

An entertaining encounter saw Torrevieja on the attack in the first half, but Orihuela’s defence held firm, and Piñera came close before the break for the visitor’s best chance. He put his side into the lead close to

the hour mark, giving Carrion no chance in the Torry goal. That blow left Torrevieja look­ ing disorganised for a few minutes, but then they got their act together and became more positive, with Dani Meseguer having the best of the chances. Torry are away to 3rd placed Paterna this Sunday lunchtime, and lie 4 points off the play­off area in an extremely competitive table.

47

Friday, February 21, 2014

WHY I (STILL) DON’T LIKE JOSE MOURINHO….

If you’re a football nut like me, you usually have one favourite team you’ve fol­ lowed forever, plus a few others you have a soft spot for.

Mine are Nottingham Forest (childhood home team), Everton (Liverpudlian underdogs), West Brom (lived near there once), Spurs (Jimmy Greaves) and Chelsea. The latter is ­ or rather was ­ largely because of that great swashbuckling Kings Road team of the late 60s: Osgood, Tambling, Hutchinson, Cooke, Bonetti etc. They were never a bor­ ing team, like say the Arsenals, or carried world­ wide fame like Manchester United; or kicked everyone like Leeds or pressurized offi­ cials like Liverpool.

These days though my sort of football has changed over the years, in support of the root of all evil: money.

The filthy lucre has spoilt the beautiful game, where wealthy money­no­ object sheiks and Russian Oligarch billionaires have made it easy for certain man­ agers to buy their way to the top. But if you live by the sword this way then you also die quickly by the same sharp instrument, your head off the minute the results stop coming in (BTW,

AND HE’S NOT SO ‘SPECIAL’ WITH ARSENAL, MAN CITY, BARCELONA AND MANY MORE

any connection here to any particular clubs, owners, managers and the way they are run today is by clever insinuation…).

Jose Mourinho burst onto the English scene in 2004 after certain continental suc­ cess involving Barcelona, Benfica and Porto. I am not in the slightest deriding Mourinho’s ability as a man­ manager and one of the shrewdest coaches in the cut­throat world of football today ­ but it is the way he goes about his job publicly I

dislike intensely. In making Chelsea a success he turned Stamford Bridge into a fortress, soon engineering an ‘everybody hates us’ siege mentality at the club, while all true blue success­starved stalwarts adored him for delivering. But in the process the self­styled ‘Special One’ alienated many others ­ like me – by making it all so per­ sonal, attacking other teams, their managers and their players, with no respect shown whatever – perhaps with the exception of Manchester United – couldn’t be he actually wanted to go there when Ferguson finally left?

Football fans all nakedly loathe each other’s teams and show it, they always have and always will ­ but football management should be above all that, consider­ ing and treating the opposi­ tion with respect and digni­ ty: qualities which Mourinho has always conspicuously lacked – along with humili­ ty.

After England, there was more success in Italy before Mourinho arrived in Spain to the most pres­

Swimming success

A busy weekend proved to be successful for the Club Natacion Torrevieja swimmers with two teams competing in different pools.

The Masters team went to Elda, with person­ al bests for Adam Stewart in the 50m and 200m freestyle events and for Beryl Altabas in her 50m Freestyle event. Other team members Gillian McNiece and Paul Matthews clocked up some excellent times in their Freestyle events.

Meanwhile, two of the Infantil girls team spent the weekend at the Olympic pool in Castellon, trying to earn national qualifica­ tion times and medals in the Winter Regional Championships. Piroska Rideg and Zoe Connolly battled it out with the best swim­ mers in the region and achieved more per­ sonal bests, with Connolly qualifying for this summer’s Infantil National Competition in the 200 metres backstroke.

surised and political football chair possible, at Real Madrid. Unfortunately arch­ rivals Barcelona were then reigning supremely: sure the Portuguese had his moments, but failed overall to wrest back leadership of La Liga football, and after three searing seasons he left ­ with few friends and a load more enemies.

Meanwhile, after a succes­ sion of more jefes Chelsea actually won the Champions League at last under the unlikely and ultimately unloved Roberto di Matteo, and in the process winning back a few old friends, like me. Poor di Matteo soon went, followed by the luck­ less Rafael Benitez who delivered the Blues the Europa Cup, and now anoth­ er previous Chelsea manag­ er Carlo Ancelotti is seeming­ ly not doing a bad job at Real Madrid, in the mad manage­ rial merry­go­round (good luck Carlo – you’ll need it).

In life they say never go back: but Jose Mourinho has, returning to his beloved Chelsea. In a relatively short time, soon making changes (with plenty of available cash of course) now Mou’s Blues

are currently top of the Premier League.

But in true Mourinho style, he has wasted no time in upsetting the opposition, and in the process once again alienating mid­ dle­of­the­road foot­ ball­loving supporters ­ like me – with his sarcastic, mocking tone that often makes no sense, as he repeatedly contradicts himself. Now, again I find myself fervently hoping his Blues will lose.

Mourinho’s credibility is sinking and stinking steadily as his comments are becom­ ing more and more distaste­ ful.

In recent weeks, Mourinho has set about Manuel Pellegrini, a dignified gentleman in my book, appearing to get under the Chilean’s skin as he did in Spain, and lately has been savaging Arsene Wenger, the Prem’s longest­serving manager, at Arsenal since 1995. Tastelessly and tact­ lessly, Mourinho insultingly called the Frenchman ‘a voyeur’ and a ‘specialist in failure’ ­ but here Wenger always wins for me: he

always displays that one quality Mourinho will never possess: dignity.

Noticeably Mourinho has never stayed long anywhere to show the sort of commit­ ment Wenger displays, another quality lacking: he doesn’t do loyalty. The man puts himself in the same league as Sir Alex Ferguson, but couldn’t lace up Fergie’s bootlaces as a company man – and significantly Mourinho wasn’t wanted to replace the Great Scot at Old Trafford last summer, when Sir Alex finally called time. So we will see how long Big Mouth lasts at Chelsea now: wasn’t too long last time, was it? And then maybe I can get back to liking Chelsea again…

Orihuela’s close shave ITV ORIHUELA 22 LORCA 14

ITV Orihuela just edged out their Murcia region visitors, with the home side scoring late on for a bonus point try to give them a more comfortable winning margin against Lorca in their first territorial division encounter. Elsewhere, Cartagena beat Torrevieja Tigers 39­10, whilst the leaders Albacete turned over third­placed Murcia, 23­12. In the 2nd division, the San Javier Squalos continue to march on the top with

their tough fought 24­5 victory at Murcia B, which keeps their 100% record going with seven win out of seven. Elsewhere, the ITV Orihuela 2nd team were soundly beaten at home, 50­20 by UCAM Murcia. In the Cadetes section, ITV Orihuela lost at home, 33­7 to UCAM Murcia, whilst in the Ladies League, the San Javier Squalos are 11 points clear at the top, as they beat their nearest rivals, Costa Almeria, 24­nil.

Friday, February 21, 2014

48

BACK TO BASICS!

As Euro expectations evaporate at the Etihad and the Emirates, it’s back down to planet Earth in the Prem.

Right!

Half­term’s finished, Europe forays and Cup capers are over ­ now it’s back to finish­ ing school for the last term. Sit up at the back there, and work hard­ er or you will go down to a lower class. Those of you trying to win the top prize, keep it clean with no dirty stuff ­ eh Jose?

Match of the Day kicks off early doors on Saturday: in a roister­ ous return to reality, the Battle of the Blues kicks off lunchtime at Stamford Bridge where leaders Chelsea take on sixth­placed Everton. Jose Mourinho is worrying us little Englanders, World Cup­wise by sacrilegiously prefer­ ring Cesar Azpilicueta to our very own 106 caps Ashley Cole – that’s Iberian infamy, innit? The game will prove a good test of Mou’s new Chelsea’s current credibility, the Toffees are through to the FA Cup quarter finals and post­Moyes Roberto Martinez’s new side are good to watch.

After Wednesdays Tale of Two Sitters, i.e. penalties missed (‘orrible Ozil ‘orror, what is the matter with him?) resulting in efficient Euro defeat by Bayern, will Arsenal be Gunned down again in the Prem by Gus’s Gung­ho guys? Plucky Poyet has produced perfectly, spurring Sunderland on to survive, and Arsene’s Army will need to be at their best, post­ Bayern to keep up their stuttering challenge at the top.

Similarly Barca­battered Man City look on paper to have a reassuringly easy home game to keep ‘em up

John McGregor reports

there aiming for the Prem title ­ but under axed­ex­ City supremo Mark Hughes, Stoke are Pottering along OK in fourteenth ­ and Sparkie has a spikey point or two to rattle his knockers with (ooh) – and City are rattled after that Etihad experience.

‘Allo, ‘Allo, it’s Goodbye to Rene Meulensteen at Fulham, and also Au Revoir to Ray Wilkins and Alan Curbishley. That didn’t take too long, did it? Bet poor old sacked Martin Jol feels a bit better now. Guten tag to Ex­Bayern Munich coach Felix Magath who is now in the wateryside seat. Shh, but, erm, currently unemployed since 2012? Sounds ideal ­ Achtung, ze only way is up, so zey say. Fuhrer Felix becomes the first German to manage in the Premier League. If, as expected Felix’s Fulham fail furthermore, and still go down, will Felix continue the continental drift? The Melcome Hawthorns is a tough place to start a new career, where resurgent West Brom look to be on the up.

West Ham return from their mid­term trip to the sun to host shaded Southampton, still simmering from their Cup exit by specialists Sunderland (did you see that Craig Garner stunner? Wow!). Saints will want to consolidate and continue their proud Prem position, but the Hammers are surviving well; Sam’s chewing the cud more contentedly currently.

At Pulis Palace, mediocre Man United visit sarf London ­ what a strange season the Reds are having.

So many questions Prince David ­ but not enough answers, Jimmy… Eagles wings to be clipped?

Super Sunday kicks off with likely lads Liverpool launching into stuttering Swansea at Anfield. Back­ stabbed ex­Swan supervisor Michael Laudrup kept up with the times, fired by e mail. This latest new

trendy trick was tried previously by nasty neighbour Vincent Tan just down the M4 at Cardiff, but miffed Malky wouldn’t log in, and was properly propelled out later – and it ‘aint over yet.

Tan, did you say? Saturday in Swales sees a serious six­pointer: both clubs strangely sport a similar problem with meddling masters: the confused Welsh Red/Bluebirds take on the baffled Humbersiders Hull City Tigers. Only the names and colours have been changed to create confusion: curtains if Cardiff lose?

Now: new nasty note. If Norwich get nowt at Carrow Road and lose to adulation­added­by­Adebayor’s Tottenham, I fear for Hughton. Will Chris crash out as per the panickers, or continue Canary­caring like the Davids at Upton Park backing their man and bucking the trend? Your call Delia, come out of the kitchen, love – hey, you weren’t on the phone to that old favourite Malky Mackay, were you?

Finally: Newcastle Villa is anyone’s guess ­ the only predictable premise with these two is that the result is perfectly unpredictable: game on!

In the Championship on Wednesday, Forest bounced back from being bounced out of the Cup by League One strugglers Sheffield United at the weekend, to nearly beat runaway leaders Leicester City. An 82nd minute equalizer saved the Foxes, and now Forest have another top six­pointer at second­placed Burnley on Saturday. Quite Possibly Remaining is not home to a happy Harry, the Hoops having slipped out of the automatic promotion places. That 3 ­1 defeat at Loftus Road by play­off hopefuls Reading last Sunday hurt badly, definitely ringing the alarm bells. Derby are third, two points above Rangers, with Forest fifth, and Reading sixth.