Week 137 by TKO Media

Edition 137

www.thecourier.es

Friday, October 4, 2013

OWN GOAL!! Dad abandons kids to play soccer shouting and screaming from the apartment. Social services and firefighters were called to the house and the father was immedi ately charged with reckless

By Alex Trelinski A football mad dad who left his four young children “home alone” has had the whistle blown on him by their mother who called in the police to arrest him, and he’s accepted a fasttrack suspended 4 month prison sentence after a “quickie” Elche court hearing on Monday. The father abandoned the youngsters aged 2, 3, 7, and 9 in their Torrellano home close to Alicante Elche airport on Sunday as

ness, ahead of Monday’s guilty plea and sentence. One of the neighbours said that the father was a “good guy who just made a grave mistake”.

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he went out to play in a foot ball match. The mother arrived at the house to pick up the children, who she

has joint custody of, and noticed that he was not there whilst the youngsters could not unlock the door

from inside. One of the chil dren needed medical treat ment after a panic attack, with neighbours hearing

He’s home... But for how long? See Page 2

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Friday, October 4, 2013

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96 692 1003 679 096 309 965 99 66 66 EMAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Calle Luis Canovas Martinez 1. Urb Aguas Nuevas, Torrevieja 03183, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 692 1003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Alex Trelinski CONSULTANT EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 966 921 003 679 096 309 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Patrick International Rep 5 Languages Tel 685 901 265 Writers Donna Gee Sally Bengtsson Jeanette Erath Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Tony Mayes John McGregor

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Picture of the Week

JUNGLE DRUMS

SMALL BOAT IN FRONT OF TORREVEIJA PORT. PICTURE TAKEN BY FRED BRUNSKILL

KING RECUPERATING

Brit in airport death

King Juan Carlos is back home after leaving a Madrid hospital on Tuesday, a week after surgeons replaced his prosthetic left hip in the lat est of a string of operations that have raised questions over the 75 year old’s reign. The King smiled and waved saying he was "very well, very well, as you can see" as he was driven away from the private hos pital where surgeons gave him a temporary hip replacement in a twoandahalfhour operation last week, because of an infection around the previous prosthetic joint. Juan Carlos must now fight off the infection with the aid of intravenous antibiotics before

A 21yearold pregnant British woman died suddenly at Girona–Costa Brava undergoing yet another operation in about Airport on Tuesday in an inci two months to fit a permanent replacement dent that could lead to joint. The temporary hip replacement was charges after it emerged the the King's eighth operation in three years, airport's medical centre was feeding speculation of a possible abdication shut down in 2012. in favour of his son Felipe, despite palace The 21 year old was trav denials. elling with her family to back to Birmingham when she felt dizzy and then fell uncon scious. Emergency services were called but the woman, fake company called who was between three and Nordic Sun. Some of the four months pregnant, died victims even rolled up at at the scene. the airport to pick up air The cause of death is not tickets to Sweden that The start of October they were promised. brought the warmest Some reports suggest October night in 92 British expats will feature that there some people years. The early hours of in a new Spanish TV drama. who actually made the Tuesday morning saw The soap, being shot by journey, paid for them Alicante City notch a Antena 3 on the Costa selves, to Sweden and on minimum of 21.7 Blanca, will feature charac arrival they found that it degrees Celsius, whilst ters called Margaret and was a complete fraud, Rojales saw 22 degrees. Susan. But it is not clear with some allegedly Forecasters say that the whether any British actors stranded there without warm west wind was will be involved in the any means of returning behind the record val series. Margaret, is a back to Spain. ues.

Scandinavia setback SWEATY

At least 30 people in the Elche area are said to have been conned with promises of a job in Sweden with a fake com pany. The National Police has been inundated with calls from people who had given money to bogus businessmen who in return promised to send a CV to a company that install solar panels in Sweden. Each CV was charged some 49 Euros, and the conmen promised exclusive access to the

START

yet known, but Spain's large UGT union is now consider ing investigating the incident. An ambulance took 14 min utes to arrive at the scene, which operators described as "within standard" time frames. But Girona–Costa Brava airport closed its 24 hour medical facilities a year ago, a decision made because of falling passenger numbers at the facility. The UGT's Secretary General of Transport Joan Muntada, said the union will now "ana lyze events to see if they could lead to charges".

SON OF ELDORADO Londoner who inherits a huge house in an inland part of the Alicante region, and after moving here, gets involved in a series of mys terious developments. The Courier cannot wait!

WANTED – MORE HEADLINE NEWS! DO YOU have a story that might grab the headlines? What’s all the gossip about round your way? A spate of robberies, perhaps – or maybe you’ve spotted a celebrity in the neighbourhood. Whether your news involves fire, police, ambulance, accidents – or hap

pier events like family weddings (particularly Golden and Diamond ones!), Just phone the Courier office on 966 921 003 or email office@thecourier.es We’re waiting for your call…and next week’s Front Page story.

Friday Showers High 28 Low 19° Chance of rain 60% Monday Showers High 25 Low 18° Chance of rain 50%

Tuesday Showers High 24° Low 17° Chance of rain 60%

Saturday Sunny High 29° Low 19° Chance of rain 3%

Sunday Cloudy High 26° Low 18° Chance of rain 50%

Wednesday Showers High 25° Low 20° Chance of rain 60%

Thursday Partly cloudy High 24° Low 13° Chance of rain 40%

Friday, October 4, 2013

NOTARY MURDER TRAIL STARTS

16 members of a Hell’s Angels gang have been in an Elche court for the start of their trial into the murder of a Torrevieja notary nearly 4 years ago. They are also facing a variety of charges including conspiracy, rob bery, and the use of weapons. Back on October 26th 2009, two men broke into the office of a public notary in Torrevieja, and demanded money from one of his employees. The notary was in an adjoining room and on hearing the commo tion, the 54 year old man was fatally shot in his abdomen when a struggle broke out with the robbers who fled the scene. A few days before, two other members of the gang went into a San Javier bar where they gunned down the owner and stole 900 Euros. In a wideranging operation, the police started an investigation which included sur veillance and wiretaps, which led to the arrest of a 33 year old man in the north of the Valencian region in April 2010 who is accused of killing the Torrevieja notary. Other arrests took place across the Orihuela Costa, Pilar de la Horadada, and San Pedro del Pinatar. The hearings are expected to continue in Elche until the end of October.

Slight of hand? A Benejúzar woman, who burned alive the man who raped her 13 year old daughter in 1998, is being investigated over the selling of her assets to avoiding paying compensation to the man’s family. His relatives have filed a complaint before the Elche Provincial Court alleging that Mari Carmen Garcia had sold off her share in a building to circumvent paying 140 thousand Euros in compensation. Her jail sentence for the 1998 crime is currently suspended pending appeals to the Council of Ministers and the Supreme Court.

San Javier airport may close as early as the late spring of 2014 after a verbal deal was struck on Monday between the Murcia Government and the Spanish airport opera tor, AENA. President Ramón Luis Valcárcel told reporters after his meeting in Madrid that he had “very satisfactory” talks with the AENA boss, Jose Manuel Vargas and the government minister, Ana Pastor, which means they could all put pen to paper in a matter of days. Valcárcel said that he was pleased with the Spanish Government’s commitment to see the new airport at Corvera open for busi ness as soon as possible, and that some 54 million Euros in compensation would need to be paid to AENA for the work they had car ried out in recent years at San Javier. That compensation would be split between the Ministry of Defence who actually own San Javier, and the new service provider at Corvera, which rumours suggest that AENA are very interested in taking over that role

from the nowsacked Aeromur. Valcárcel said that any agreement with AENA would safeguard the jobs of those who had been working at San Javier, and assuming there are no legal delays caused by the dispute with Aeromur, and that the re awarding for the service contract for Corvera goes smoothly, then the switchover from San Javier to Corvera could happen as soon as the middle of 2014.

A judge has ruled that a Zaragoza driving school was right to charge female learners more than their male counterparts. Judge Javier Albar decided in favour of the school which had argued their decision to charge women more than men wasn't discriminato ry. His reasoning was that official data from the Directorate of Traffic proved that "every single year, men displayed greater dexterity and better open road skills" than their female counterparts. Back in 2011, Autoescuela Zaragoza advertised a deal where, for 665 Euros, men

aged 18 to 22 could get as many classes as they needed to obtain their driving license, whilst women were charged 850 Euros. Zaragoza's consumer rights group then fined the school 4000 Euros for sexual discrimina tion. The school argued that even their own data showed male learners required five practical lessons fewer than female ones, and took the matter to court. Judge Albar agreed with the driving school, arguing that it's obvious that a fee that offers male drivers more classes than they need for a higher price won't appeal to them as consumers.

Bullfighting and bullrunning will be offi cially considered 'national cultural her itage' based upon its 'tradition' in Spain after a Parliamentary vote. The move comes from a petition received in Congress with 600,000 signatures calling for the spectacle to be considered a 'cul tural asset', and will mean the govern ment will create measures and invest money in promoting and protecting bull fighting and bullrunning throughout the country. Opposition members, including most of the PSOE, abstained from voting. Certain

regions of Spain, including Catalunya and the Canary Islands, have banned bullfighting altogether and some towns and villages have even stopped bullrun ning, where the animals are set loose in the street and egged on by fencedoff crowds although are not actually maimed or killed.

Sorry ladies, men are better behind the wheel

STUBBED OUT TAKE THEM DOWN

Five people, including two residents of an Alicante City nursing home, needed treat ment for minor injuries and smoke inhalation after an explosion. The bang on Wednesday afternoon was caused after a 75 year old resident tried to light a ciga rette after removing his oxy gen mask. The spark from the lighter ignited with the oxygen to cause the incident, with the man fortunate to suf fer just burns to his hands as well as smoke inhalation. 200 residents and 30 work ers were evacuated from the home in the Virgen del Carmen area of the city.

San Javier closure looms

Time’s up for unlicensed billboards and flyposters in the Torrevieja area. The council is to rigorously enforce the rules with addi tional measures planned shortly. Mayor Eduardo Dolon urged people who had illegal sites or who flyposted, to voluntarily stop their activi ties before legal action was taken against them. He said that he was also concerned by the activities of major advertising companies who indiscriminately used areas like key traffic junctions or public spaces without per mission.

BULL FIGHTING BACKED

LIGHTS, CAMERA, AND ARREST! Two dumb thieves have appeared in a Torrevieja court after helping provide the perfect evidence of their robberies, after they recorded some of their breakin’s on video! The 23 and 24 year olds were arrested in a stolen car in Guardamar, having travelled from the Toledo area of central Spain, where they committed the offences.

When police investigated the Peruvian and Ecuadorian, they looked at a memory card from one of their mobile phones which had video footage from a number of robberies in Toledo. The bungling burglars had apparently tried to use the phone as a flashlight, but pressed the video button instead. Police say they believe that they stole from five houses, as well as tak ing nine cars.

Friday, October 4, 2013

New home for old fossils Russell barks again A lucky dog from Malaga called Russell has been making national news after cheating a lethal injection. Poor Russell was just one of thousands of abandoned dogs who were due to be put down after a summer cleanup on the Costa del Sol. After the vet had carried out the sad task of checking the dogs for a pulse, he was surprised to find that Russell was still alive, having had a stroke of luck. It appears that Russell only got the first injection, which only put him to sleep, and the second lethal dose wasn’t given to him. The vet managed to hide him under a blanket after realizing the mis

If you’ve been scratching your head won dering about the strange building that’s popped up next to the San Javier to Murcia road close to Balsicas, then The Courier can tell you that the finished structure will host the most important paleontological museum in the Murcia region. The project has been financed by the Murcia government in con

junction with the Torre Pacheco Council but there’s one problem: work stopped back in February! The next phase of building is due to get going in the next few months with the hope that the museum will open in 2015, some 5 years late. More than 4 million Euros have been spent so far, which is half the esti mated cost of the project.

Cock a doodle don’t

take, and later called the dog rescue cen tre Ladridos Felices (Barking Happy), who offered Russell a temporary home until a permanent abode is found for him.

Old stash re-hashed

Nine people have been in an Alicante court this week to face charges of drug smug gling dating back to March 2006. The Guardia Civil inter cepted the landing of more than two tons of hashish in Altea. Prosecutors have called for jail sentences rang ing between 4 and 6 years, with the hash stash being brought in from Morocco. The market value of the drugs was said to be 2.5 mil lion Euros.

BURNT PALMS

More than a hundred palm trees were destroyed in a fire that was started delib erately between Bigastro and Jacarilla. Three fire crews brought the blaze under control on Tuesday afternoon, with police Orihuela Police have arrested three men for stealing six roosters from a farm at La working on the theory that Matanza near Fortuna, close to the Orihuela/Murcia border. Pruning shears and mari it was caused by an arson juana were also recovered from the car in addition to the animals, after the aggrieved ist who has previously farmer pursued them in his car. struck in the area.

Guardamar’s high Silence of the bars street ideas

Guardamar Council is to consult with local business owners over plans for a new look for the main High Street. Options include making it a one way route or even ban ning vehicles altogether, something that most shop owners are said to be against. They’ve also made it clear that they don’t want any further parking restrictions.

SAN JUAN BODY

A man’s body was found floating in the shallow waters of Alicante’s San Juan beach on Monday. It was spotted at lunchtime, and there were no apparent signs of violence. The National Police are investigating further.

Two popular Santiago de la Ribera bars on Calle Salon have been silenced after a noise complaint. A resident on the street com plained to the police about loud music and the noise from customers sitting out side the Appalachian Bar and the Anubis Bar which are based on a vehiclefree road. The owners of the establishments say they have invested substantially in their busi nesses and that the noise level does not go

JOBLESS UP Spain's jobless queues grew last month as the summer season ended, ending a run of six months of falling figures. The number of unemployed rose by 25,572 from August to 4.72 million in September, the first increase since February. But when figures were correct ed to smooth out seasonal variations, the number of jobless fell by 35,631 peo ple to 4.83 million. Unemployment fig ures in Alicante Province rose by 998 to just over 220 thousand, whilst the Murcia region saw a September rise of 323 taking the figure to 151 thousand.

HEALTH CARD TALK

The latest seminar about using the

above acceptable limits. They’ve been given two months to submit amended licensing plans to the local council. European Health Insurance Card (EHIC) takes place next Tuesday at the Orihuela Costa Town Hall, Playa Flamenca starting at 11.00am. The event has been jointly organised by the UK Department of Health and the Valencian Health Authority.

DUNE DEAL

Guardamar’s dunes at La Fonteta and La Rabita Caliphate are set for a new look with plans to turn them into a 23 thousand square metre archaeological park, to be called the Cultural Park Dunes of Guardamar. In conjunction with the Alicante Provincial Council, Guardamar is set to publicise the his torical importance of the sites as well as being a major tourist boost to the area.

Friday, October 4, 2013

Rural gang nabbed

A Romanian gang that concentrated on robbing mainly rural homes across Alicante Province has been arrested in a joint oper ation between the Guardia Civil and the National Police. 7 men and 5 women, all of whom are Romanians, are said to have committed at least 110 robberies with their operation based in the Alcoy area. Authorities launched a dragnet on the gang back in June when they noticed a leap in

the rise of rural burglaries around Alcoy and started surveillance work before swooping on homes and making arrests last week. Amongst property seized were agricultural machinery, televisions, mobile phones, and computers. Police said that the burglars would force their way into properties breaking down gates and fences, and then smashing windows and forcing locks.

TOLLS PAY A PRICE

Cost conscious drivers are continuing to give Spain’s toll roads a wide berth, with a claim that traffic on them has dipped by 35% since the start of the reces sion. Abertis, who run half of the toll routes, say that in just 2013, there’s so far been a 9% fall in vehicles using their roads com pared to 2012.

DRUG PENALTIES

An Alicante court has handed out 8 year jail stretches to 3 people for trying to trans port over 50 kilos of cocaine on a bus between Algeciras and Barcelona. National Police raided the coach at

Alicante bus station after the driver tipped them off that he was suspicious about the weight of several suitcases that were on board. The market value of drugs was close to 5 million Euros.

British expats in Spain could be in for some good news due to a new European deal, which would slash expensive pen sion transfer charges. The Officially Certified European Retirement Plan (OCERP) would be strictly regulated to help protect con sumers.

“The creation of the OCERP would help overcome the current fragmentation of the European pensions market,” said Peter de Proft, director general of the European Fund and Asset Management Association. “And thus improve the cost effectiveness of these products and their portability between member states.”

PENSION BOOST SEIG HEIL FLEAS

A fascist memorabilia market held at a school gym outside Madrid has kicked up a furore over the alleged links between the ruling Partido Popular(PP) and the dictator, General Franco. Visitors at Quijorna's Saturday memorabilia mar ket could buy everything from Franco posters to Nazi swastikas and SS Totenkopf skull emblems. Organizers got permis sion from the municipality’s mayor, PP leader Meredes García, to hold the event at a local statefunded school. When asked by the El País newspaper why she had allowed the fascist flea mar ket to take place, she argued that she "hadn't spotted the swastikas or Nazi paraphernalia" when she visited it on Saturday. "There was never any inten tion to hurt anybody’s feel ings," she added. The fas cist flea market was part of

a military display held in the small municipality to honour those who lost their lives during the Republican takeover of Quijorna during the Spanish Civil War. Meanwhile, the United Nations has told the Spanish government that they need to do more to investigate the disappear ance of people during the years of Franco’s dictator ship. "The State must assume a leadership role and engage more actively to respond to the demands of

thousands of families searching for the fate or whereabouts of their loved ones, who disappeared dur ing the civil war and the dic tatorship", said the experts of the Working Group of the United Nations on Enforced or Involuntary Disappearances. The comments came at the end of a visit by the UN working group to Spain to investigate alleged mass forced disappearances under the regime of Francisco Franco.

Friday, October 4, 2013

editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

Time the people had a say in costa’s politics

Spanish laws and the hound of music At last a newspaper with the 'balls' to stick their heads above the parapet (Grumpy Old Gran The Sound of Silence). The 'law' on playing live music in bars on the Costa Blanca is bordering on luna cy. I am a bar owner (JP's in Mil Palmeras www.barjps.com) I have been persecuted by the local police and Guardia whilst Spanish owned bars and Town Hall spon sored events are playing music at a vol ume that would wake the dead. I have no

wish to antagonise my neighbours and indeed it is only one who phones the police to complain. The Police tell me it is not their fault; it is a law that is not enforced until some body complains and nobody complains about the Spanish bars and Town Hall events. I am looking for support to see if the law can be enforced in a sensible manner. GRAHAM LEWIS Mil Palmeras

HAVING lived here now for seven years, I find it depressing how little has changed in the political life of the coast. We are still being ignored, sidelined and given shoddy treatment. When the coalition came in at the last election I was delighted because I thought naively that things would improve, but of course Orihuela politicians of whatever colour use us as a cash cow. I think it would help greatly if the English news papers would report at least the main points of the plenary meetings in Orihuela so that residents of the coast are aware what gets decided even if they have no say. That might in time gal vanise opinion with resi dents that they should be better represented and that they have it in their hands to vote and improve the sit uation on the coast. After all it's shocking that with equal population we only have one representative and he was sidelined by his friendly coalition part ner, which says a lot about him. Just recently we have seen the subject of Cala Mosca reappear, lo and behold even the Mayor made one of his very rare appearances, just to show how much he cares about the coast. Cala Mosca was initiated and highlighted by the CLARO party, which was against the odds. So, fellow residents, make an effort and register to vote, because we can change things! RAINER KARL FAILONI, Orihuela Costa

NAKED BEACH CHILD A LURE FOR WEIRDOS

IN this age of sexual menace, we were appalled to see a British couple allow their five yearold daughter run naked around the beach at La Mata last Friday afternoon. We holiday in the Torrevieja area reg ularly but with Madeleine McCann’s dis appearance still vivid in our memories, we could not believe these parents would allow their child to be exposed to the eyes of individuals of dubious morality. It would not have been so bad had they kept their blondehaired daughter with them, but these thoughtless people lay lazily on the beach and sent the little girl to a beach bar to buy an ice cream on her own. As she stood at the bar giving her order, she was in full view of any num

ber of potential predators. How much encouragement did they want to give to paedophiles and other weirdos, for heaven’s sake? For all her mum and dad knew, pho tographs of the little girl could now be doing the rounds on child pornography websites. We are not prudes, but some of the men on the beach appeared distinctive ly ‘iffy’. The little girl was standing alongside some of these seedy looking men when she was buying her ice cream. Why on earth did her mother or father not at least accompany her to the beach bar? You cannot be too careful these days. Would it have been so difficult to put the child in a swimsuit...or at least keep her bits covered? KATH and DOUG VILES, Stoke

A charity with a diffference... WE know there are many charities in the area, all doing good work, but what makes our charity different, what does Help At Home Costa Blanca offer ? We offer a little FREE help at home to those in need of all ages and nationalities. We have two branches, covering Orihuela Costa & Torrevieja, Quesada, San Luis, La Siesta, La Mata and La Marina. We are one of only three registered charities in Orihuela Costa, the other two being Caritas Orihuela Costa and Age Concern Sur. When I say registered, I mean registered with the Valencian Charities Association Authorities. Confusion has arisen lately about charities. It is easy to check. If the charity has two numbers, a CV Number which proves it is a registered charity of Valencia and CIF G.. no which is a tax no. Charities must be registered with the Hacienda / Tax Office as a Non Profit making Association and the charity can reg ister to be IVA Exempt. The tax office produce a letter of proof of IVA exemption for production of payment to suppliers. Anyone can ask to see the charity Statutes and the letters from the Hacienda to prove it is tax exempt to prove it is a

Continued on Page 9

DON’T FORGET, WE NEED YOUR DETAILS Letters and emails will only be considered for publication if an address and contact number are provided to confirm authenticity

THE COURIER DOES NOT NECESSARILY AGREE WITH THE VIEWS EXPRESSED IN THE LETTERS ON THIS PAGE

My git-parade grump I NEVER thought I'd be one of the grumpy old gits who actually writes to your paper. My 'grump' is the music played here, in bars and on the radio. Is everyone here 70+ years old? All stuck in the time warp of 1950 to 1969? All you hear is Elvis, Beatles, Dave Clarke 5, Cilla etc. etc. I am no youngster, I just turned 57

last week, but my generation listened to Glam Rock (Roxy Music, David Bowie etc.), Punk Rock (The Sex Pistols, The Clash, The Damned etc.), New Wave (Elvis Costello, Ian Dury, Madness Etc.), New Romantics (Spandau Ballet, Visage etc.) even Grunge (Nirvana, Pearl Jam etc.). Why is this music never played on the radio or in bars? Do you think it will in about 15

years? Should I come back then? Personally I am sick to death of some people murdering 'Peggy Sue' or 'Pretty Woman' nightly in bars. I live close to four or five bars, so can't even get away from it if I stay in! Don't even get me started on the Dire Karaoke! G.J.MOORE Playa Flamenca.

Friday, October 4, 2013

DAI OF JUDGMENT ANYONE with more than one brain cell knows there are both good and bad people in every nationality, eth nic and religious group. Yet the stereotype images still persist. The other day, a friend was discussing a holiday she and her husband had spent in North Wales when she blurted out: “I can’t stand the Welsh. They were so rude in our hotel – they would be speaking in English and the moment we entered the room they’d go into a huddle and start chatting in Welsh.’’ I’m sure other readers have had similar experiences. But you can’t pull the wool over my eyes – bleating about the bigots of Baa mouth and Baangor is blatant stereotyping. I’m a Taff and the only Welsh I speak is the national anthem and the hymns we sang at school assembly. And while I understand my friend’s antagonism towards the antiEnglish element in the north of the Principality, I assure her that those people are not repre sentative of the Welsh as a nation. The map alongside confirms what I have always known that when it comes to the language, Wales is effectively a divided nation. Go into any pub in Cardiff, and you’re like ly to find as many sheep as Welsh speakers at the baaaa (sorry, bar). If my friend, who is an Essex girl or ‘giw’ as they saw down there, visited any of the South Wales coast or valleys, she’d under stand why they sing about keeping a wel come in the hillsides. For everyone. The only thing she might find Daiabolical is that in tightknit communities like the Rhondda, everyone knows everyone else’s business. When I was a junior reporter in Pontypridd

Indeed to goodness, national stereotypes are so Taff to take

back in the don’t remember whens, it was not unusual (sorry, Tom) to find myself in some nearby mining community seeking an address. “Excuse me, where is Llanover Road?’ I’d ask a passing woman, who we’ll call Nerys. “It’s not far,’’ she’d reply, adding , “What number you looking for, then?’’ “24,’’ I’d say. “Raymond and Margaret won’t be in,’’ would come the instant reply from Nerys. “They don’t finish work until 5.15.’’ I’ve related that anecdote to convey the

Caught at Customs with my pants down I GOT my knickers in a twist on Tuesday...and suffered the biggest embarrassment of my life. I’ve still not got over the evening I walked past hundreds of gaping holiday makers during a medieval jousting show in Benidorm with the back of my skirt tucked into my undies. But at least my kecks were where they were supposed to be as I took the long walk back to my seat from the toilets. I just wish the woman who tipped me off had not been so far from the scene of the crime. That was bad enough, but when you feel you’re about to be parted from your most intimate item of clothing, the last place you want the accident to happen is in front of Her Majesty’s Customs Officers. It’s not as if I was carrying contraband goods between my legs. The only band within intimate reach was on a private assignment under my skirt, although admittedly it had been a bit overstretched before I began my megadiet in January. But I’d never even considered the pos sibility that I would be caught with my

pants down in a busy airport terminal. I had just cleared passport control at Manchester and was marvelling at the speed with which we had disembarked from Ryanair’s flight from Alicante (credit where credit’s due) and negotiated the queueless corridors of Terminal 3. Then, as I passed under the green Nothing to Declare sign, my knicker elas tic decided to snap just like that. Trying to look as nonchalant as possi ble, I pulled my hand luggage along with one hand, grabbed the side of my skirt with the other and tried to halt the gravi tational pull towards my ankles. I began to shuffle rather than walk in a desperate bid to retain my modesty as fellow passengers followed me towards the Meeting Point. I fully expected a Customs Officer to tap me on the shoulder, convinced I was carrying illegal drugs between my legs, and order: “Walk this way please, madam. You’re knicked!’’ I just wanted to walk ANY way...to the sanctuary of my waiting daughter. Well, I made it and so did my knickers. To the dustbin.

extremes. The head Bangors of the north are no more typical of Welsh people than Nosey Nerys of Nantgarw . The cold shoulder of North Walians is prompted by the massive chip some of them have on it – and there are English Nerys’s all around my urbanisation here in Spain. Preconceptions are both stupid and dan gerous. Years ago, if I told people I was Welsh, they would invariably start goading me with expressions like “Indeed to good ness’’ or “Look you.’’ In reality, you’re as likely to hear either expression emanating from Welsh lips as a Scot bleating ‘’Och aye the noo’’ or an Irishman greeting you with ‘’Top of the morn ing to you.’’ In fact, they are the Celtic equivalent of an English rugger fan chirping: “Whatho jolly dee.’’ The fact is that those expressions only exist as parodies of the citizens of certain

regions. Brits who move away from the UK quickly discover that the familiar accent of their home locality is replaced by a maze of differ ent interpretations of the English language. In Spanish, pronunciation is relatively easy – what you see is what you say. It’s bad enough trying to spell in English…but what hope does a Spanish student have when Ulstermen say ‘nye’ and mean ‘now’ and Londoners talk about ‘giwz and boys.’ Hell, we even have Geordies and Glaswegians using initials instead of words…as in ’Y.I.’ and ‘C.U’. OK, I know I’m really no better than the parody plonkers I was knocking earlier in this article. But isn’t it ironic that we have to move to Spain to explore the fascinating melting pot of British accents? Accents that for most of our lives we tend to hear only on TV. Indeed to goodness it is.

Friday, October 4, 2013

A charity with a diffference... From Page 6 non profit concern. What type of services do we offer? Help At Home Costa Blanca provide trans port and when needed a translator, to medical centres and hospitals for treata ment and appointments for their clients. It is not as easy as one would like to book an ambulance, we provide drivers who become a friend. We have access to a Spanish qualified Doctor and Pharmacist who can check your diagnosis and medication prescribed. They also offer to translate at hospitals, medical centres and the INNS office in Torrevieja, FREE. They visit clients who are very ill, before and after surgery, as the case of a couple where the wife is so worried about her hus band who is extremely ill, she feels alone, no family members to reassure her or to give her a hug. I decided to contact the ‘A’ Team, to check out his condition and med ication before he is admitted into hospital, all was fine, thank goodness. The same for another client in Torrevieja hospital, waiting to be discharged after suf fering a stroke, heart attack and organ col lapse. Again his wife was very anxious that her husband was not well enough to be discharged, what she could or not do? Jose met me at the hospital 9.15pm to reassure the clients. He is fantastic, thank you Jose. We offer home help, clean wash, cook, change your bed, do your shopping, walk your dog and offer to do odd jobs, Free for 4 weeks. We also offer respite / friendship

to those with a long term condition such as Alzheimers, Dementia, M.S., Motor Neurone, Huntingdon’s and Parkinson’s Disease. This service is FREE, but we do need more volunteers, please contact our Charity Centre located at 117 Flamenca Beach Commercial Centre Orihuela Costa if you are interested and want to join our fantastic team. Mobility equipment: We provide for a donation, wheelchairs, crutches, etc., walking frames and other medical aids if we have them available. We also raise funds for children with spe cial needs conditions to help pay towards their medical aids to make their lives a little more comfortable, especially if their par ents are suffering hardship due to unem ployment or low income. Currently, we have approx 74 cases regis tered for help, this included 19 with long term conditions. We also have 33 cases of Social and Welfare need and recently 5 special needs children. We desperately need more volunteers to offer a little help, we are gaining 4 to 6 clients every week. We need Carers, Befrienders, Translators and if anyone has nursing experience, retired or not, we would love to hear from you. Call 602 345 020 our volunteer line or the office 691 585 167. Email : helpathomecb@gmail.com NORAH BOND Founder – Help At Home Costa Blanca.

Friday, October 4, 2013

MY SCHOOL DAZE

I have mostly pleasant memories of the sound of my mother's voice but not the one she would put to effective use to get me out of bed when I was a sleepy schoolboy. 'Rise and shine, our David, you lazy beggar!' she'd yell upstairs. Her bellowing tone was like a foghorn shredding the mists of my semicon sciousness. 'Coming,' I'd croak in response and then I'd turn over and pull the covers over my head in a pathetic denial undertheduvet gesture. Monday morning had come around yet again. But why did I still need to go to school? I already knew all that I wanted to know. And what did I have to look forward to on a mirthless, miserable Monday? A double maths period, that's what. I hated double maths. I also hated single maths but only half as much. However, hold on a minute. Who said it was Monday? I was still groggy after a sound night's sleep so

I could have got the day wrong. Maybe it was Tuesday. In which case I had a French lesson to face. I hated French (Je detestais le fran cais.) But hang on again. Maybe it was Mercredi, I mean Wednesday. That meant it was physics first thing. Physics I didn't mind. I always daydreamed during physics. While my class mates were busy applying themselves to plotting the cooling curve of naphtha lene, I was scoring a hattrick for Manchester United or escorting Gloria Greenhalgh to the pictures. Gloria was gorgeous but she was barely aware of my existence even though she lived only a few doors down the street. Never mind, I could always dream about . . . well, anything. As an ado lescent fantasist, the world was my whatsits. Anyway, I wondered, as I poked my nose out from under the blankets and sniffed the morning air, was it

Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday? I yawned and then considered it might even be Thursday. Ooh, that was not a good one. Start the day with a physical education workout? I don't think so. 'Okay, you lot,' the PE teacher would say. 'Trot three times around the gym, then over the pommel horse, across the beam, up the rope and down the wall bars.' 'No can do, sir,' I would respond. 'You have used far too many prepositions for my

liking in that instruction. Anyway, much as though I'd love to accommodate you, I cannot possibly partake in that maelstrom of manoeu vres. 'You see, sir, I hurt my leg this morning while leaping out of bed. I fell over the dog which was chasing the cat. My mum did write you a note but the hamster was sick all over it.' The PE teacher would tut. 'That's a wild little zoo you have at home, Silver. Now go

stand in the corner with the other sick, lame or lazy boys.' Meanwhile, back in my pit, I yawned again, peeped out from under the bedclothes and pondered that maybe it was Friday. In which case, I had geography to contend with. I didn't like geography. Too many places to learn about. Who cared? All I needed to know were the locations of my nearest cinema and chip py, not that I would ever escort Gloria Greenhalgh to

either establishment in the foreseeable future. I twisted and turned in my bed, still trying to work out what day of the working week it was, when Mother sounded her foghorn again. 'What a waste of time you are, our David! I did try to get you up but as usual you ignored me. Well, it's too late now, she's already left.' (She? What she?) 'Let's face it,' Mother blast ed on. 'It's not every Saturday morning that Gloria Greenhalgh pops round to see if you fancy going to the pictures tonight, followed by a chip supper.' 'Oh, my pounding heart!' I shrieked with pleasure, threw back my blankets and leaped out of bed. 'Oh, my throbbing leg!' I shrieked with pain as I fell over the dog which was chasing the cat. 'Don't be such a drama queen, our David!' admon ished Mother. 'Might I sug gest you write Gloria a note and I'll send the hamster round to her house with it?'

Friday, October 4, 2013

SAY IT IN SPANISH Learn the lingo - with a little help from JEANETTE ERATH Spanish 91 So before we carry on with the Preterite tense here are the answers to last weeks translations:

make the i > y change, however the written accent over the i appears only in the first person singular form.

Here is the verb destruir in the preterite: destruí, destru iste, destruyó, destruimos, destruisteis, destruyeron The ants died las hormigas murieron, they repeated the Verbs covered in this change are: construir ( él construyó, question twice – ellos repitieron la pregunta dos veces, ellos construyeron), contribuir (él contribuyó ellos con she asked for more coffee – ella pidió más café, Pablo tribuyeron), destruir ( él destruyó, ellos destruyeron), didn´t hear me – Pablo no me oyó, he provided his phone fluir (él fluyó, ellos fluyeron), huir (él huyó, ellos number to the police – él proporcionó su número de telé huyeron), incluir (él incluyó, ellos incluyeron), influir (él fono a la policía, Did you give me your book? ¿me diste influyó, ellos influyeron) tu libro? We brought sandwiches to the beach – trajimos bocadillos a la playa, they walked to the shops and bought Moving on to verbs that end –ucir all verbs with this ending bread – anduvieron a la playa y compraron pan, I knew are conjugated the same as producir: the address but could not find the house – supe la dirección Produje, produjiste, produjo, produjimos, produjisteis, pero no pude encontrar la casa. I played the guitar last produjeron week – toqué la guitarra la semana pasada, did you drink The other verbs covered in this ending are: conducir (él condujo, ellos con the orange juice? ¿bebiste el zumo de naranja? dujeron), deducir (él dedujo, ellos dedu Remember when to use this tense, it is for past actions that jeron), inducir (él are within a specific time frame or occasion it answers the indujo, ellos indu question “when?” or “for how long?” Any other past action jeron), introducir (él that does not answer those questions is in the Imperfect introdujo, ellos intro Tense which we will get on to soon. The hardest part of verbs dujeron), reducir (él is remembering the endings and also getting used to the fact redujo, ellos redu that the word can possibly consist of only two letters to say jeron), traducir (él something that in English takes at least two words. For tradujo, ellos tradu example ´I gave´ in the Spanish preterite is di, but once you jeron) get used to the tense and begin to use it in conversation, as in every other part of Spanish it becomes more natural and That is the end of the you will get used to it. changes in conjugation of the verbs in the Last week we learnt the conjugations for verbs that change i preterite, however > y there are some exceptions to the verbs, those are traer there are some verbs (and it´s compound verbs atraer and distraer) which we that change meaning learnt in lesson 89, in verbs ending –guir (e.g. seguir) the u when used in the is not pronounced and verbs ending in –uir (e.g. destruir) preterite. Following is

an explanation of the verb and it´s present tense meaning and then it´s meaning when used in the preterite tense: Conocer – to know(person/place) : to meet (conocí a Juan hace tres años – I met John three years ago) Poder – to be able to : to manage to do something (Ella pudo encontrarlo – she managed to find it) No poder – not be able to do something : to fail to do some thing (No pudimos encontrarlo – we couldn´t / failed to find it) Querer – to want : to try (Quise salir – I tried to leave / i real ly wanted to leave very much) No querer – to not want : to refuse (El no quiso comer – he refused to eat) Saber – to know (fact/information) : to find out/learn (¿cuán do lo supiste? – when did you find [it] out?) Sentir – to feel : to regret/be sorry (sentí llamarla – I regret ted calling/ I was sorry I called her) That is the end for the preterite tense. I am going to leave you with a few lines in Spanish to read to yourself and any one else who is interested in listening. As you read try to understand the words without thinking too much about it, and try not to translate every word in your head, just relax, read and understand: No pude dormir anoche porque vi una película rara. Entonces leí una revista en mi cama hasta tarde y después miré en el internet. Pero nada que hice me ayudó, fui a la cocina para hacer un bocadillo porque tuve hambre. El día siguiente hablé con mi mejor amiga y ella dijo que tampoco pude dormir porque vio la misma película. Estamos de acuerdo que nunca más vamos a ver una película rara tan tarde por la noche. Next week I will be giving you some homework to do with the preterite tense, so check the last few weeks’ lessons and prepare yourself for a preterite test lesson.

Friday, October 4, 2013

BLAME THE LOUTS, NOT THE DOGS

I spent last week in London, with a fully booked schedule and many dogs to visit, but after a few days, I was yearning to return to Spain, as sadly not a lot has changed where I use to live. The biggest problem was the yob culture that has spread across like a disease. Everywhere I went, there was evidence of teenagers causing misery on other people. When I was travelling back to my sister's home on the bus one night, some teenagers got on and refused to pay their fare and when the driver didn’t want to take them, they then wouldn’t budge! Something has gone badly wrong in Britain over the past few decades and it continues to head in what I think, is a very dangerous direction. What I also saw plenty of, was louts walking down the street, with a poor dog next to them, being simply used as weapons. Most of these dogs were Mastiffs or Staffordshire Bull Terriers and these idiots who have these dogs are to blame for the fact that these breeds probably make up about 80% of the population in rescue centres across the country. There are many people who believe that Britain is a nation of animal lovers, and yes I know there are some great dog owners over there, but you may be surprised to learn that statistically that country is the worst offending place in regard to animal abuse in Europe. I put this down to a law less culture of people that have been bred there, who don't work and they don't want to work. They don't pay rent and they don't want to pay rent. What's the point in them going to all that trouble, after all, as they are living in a country that

rewards bad behaviour and punishes good behaviour? Just sit on your backside all day and they will reward you, but you dare to go out to work and you’ll be taxed for virtually every thing you have! How does that make sense? Just in the same way that it is insane, that these people should be allowed to treat dogs in this way. Because of their irresponsibility someone has to pay and, yes you have guessed it: it is not them but the poor dogs! That is why Battersea Dogs Home, along with countless other rescue centres are putting thousands of healthy dogs to sleep each year. That’s because they cannot cope with the pressure, but this not a dog problem but a problem with society. In 1996, Battersea took in 396 Staffordshire Bull Terriers, whilst by 2009, that figure rocketed to 3,600! In the

next decade, there will be another unfortunate breed that these louts decide will look good as a weapon. I think the UK government should make more of an effort to wipe out this problem, that is if they are not too busy fid dling their expenses. Someone should take a photo of all these dogs that are put to sleep through no fault of their own and maybe then something may be done, but until then it is the dogs who suffer due to human incompetence. On arriv ing thankfully back in Spain, I did notice one big difference between the two countries. Looking at the teenagers where I live in Pinoso, none of them were walking down the street with a tough looking dog by their side. What they were walk ing down the street with though was a football. Which is why they are World and European champions and England can not even score from a penalty kick! I am available for consultations throughout the Costa Blanca region, if you are having problems with your furry best friend. To book a consultation you can Email me at peter@thedogyouneed.com and I will contact you straight away. We have also set up an animal charity, where we help the most severely abused and injured animals in Spain. If you would be kind enough to donate anything to this special cause you can do by PayPal, where the account details are peter@thedogyouneed.com or to our Nat West charity account, where the sort code is 601603 and the account number is 73754900. Even One Euro will help, so please, please, try and support us. We really do need your help. Thank you.

PETS’ CORNER: CAN YOU TAKE IN A HOMELESS DOG OR CAT? Gertie is a loving young lady born late March 2012 and hand reared. Although she has always been an indoor cat she would adapt to being allowed outside when she wanted to. To meet Gertie please call Joe (The Cat Man) on 966719272

Gertie Alfie was found cowering under some rubbish bins. He is about 1 year old and loves to be made a fuss of. He is a small dog who is very friendly and affectiona te with others. He would make someone an ideal pet who has very little space. Please contact K9 or PHONE 600 84 54 20 for more info www.k9club.es

Alfie Mami looking for her forever home. Could it be Yours... Contact Perros de Alicante (rehoming dogs in Spain) by facebook or call 634 065 540

Dani is a gentle soul, he was found wandering in the campo, he is thought to be anywhere between 12 18months, he is obedient gentle, loving and he likes to play and loves to be with people. If you can offer this super dog a home please call 650 304 746 or email: p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail .com

Dani

Nina was thrown from a car and the people drove off lea ving her behind. She is around 9 months old, very playful and affectionate. Nina will make a lovely lap cat. Call: 645 469 253 www.petsinspain.com

Jimbo is a 2 year old, large crossbreed. He was found by the road in a very poor condition; very thin and infested with ticks. Each day he is putting on weight and getting stronger, so he will need someone who will be able to handle a powerful dog. Please call 966710047 or email info@satanimalrescue.com

Petra is around 18 months old and was found in July in the Campo dragging her broken back leg, she has had surgery on it and is now completely recovered and waiting for a home. She is good with other dogs and cats and weighs just 5 kilos. Call. 645 469 253 www.pet sinspain.com

Molly is one of a litter of nine puppies, left abandoned in a cardboard box when they were a few weeks old. They are just under a year old and medium sized dogs. To arrange to meet Molly or visit the Cattery please contact Yvonne on 630 422 563

Nina

Jimbo

Petra

Molly

Friday, October 4, 2013

Call 966 921 003 NOW!

Friday, October 4, 2013

PRIDE OR IGNORANCE

I am sure that many of my friends think I am a even giving their local tele a chance. Of course I can under and, for some, as long as they have had their tapas then they bit strange. I admit there are times when I can stand why people emigrate to Spain: the lifestyle, the weath are integrating, forgetting that it´s a huge step to move to behave a bit oddly but usually it subsides! er, the people, the community, it´s all so much better than another country and there is more to Spain than tapas and However the main reason my friends think this is because I don´t have English television. If I want to watch a particular English program there are internet sites that I can go on to watch it, however I find myself not using them as I never real ly think about it. Several times over the past few weeks peo ple have asked me if I have seen a particular advert or reminded me that a program is about to start. I have to gently remind them that my programming comes from a Spanish aerial and as such, UK adverts and X factor are not on my viewing list. I used to have UK television, but I decided that I didn´t really want to pay monthly for something that I could get for free, and as my Spanish improved I find myself watching more and more pro grammes in the original language. I still change the American dramas or information shows into English as I hate watching dubbed programming, although I admit to sometimes not realising it´s in Spanish for a good few minutes, when I realise the mouths are out of sync with the words. I love Spain and I do think it´s great that people can watch their own country's programmes from anywhere in the world, however I also think it´s a shame that so many do it without

certainly where I used to live in the UK, however I really can siestas. With my level of Spanish I have been able to learn not understand why people make no effort to integrate into so much from Spaniards, things I could never have known the lifestyle. I believe a lot of Brits want to live in Britain in the about had I not made the huge effort. For those of us with young families we are giving our chil sun and then complain when their television gets turned off or they can´t understand something. My biggest annoyance I dren the very best start in life with two languages, I wish above anything else that my par ents had started me with language lessons when I was young. It is a skill that can be carried through life and helps no end with the chal lenges life can throw at them. I also believe that young people, faced with learning a foreign lan guage, also learn about the culture of that country and as such have their eyes opened which in turn opens their mind and makes them well rounded adults. The Spanish are beginning to realise the importance of having their children learn English, and suppose with the British here in Spain is the absolute belief the earlier they are started the better. All nationalities have a by many that everyone speaks English, and if they don´t sense of pride, which makes them unique to their country, there is something wrong with them and they should learn, however let´s not confuse pride with ignorance. Pride is lov forgetting of course that this is, after all, a country many hun ing your country, accepting it´s problems and enjoying its dreds of miles from their green and pleasant land, instead benefits but also being open to learning new things, igno convincing themselves that these ´foreigners´ should learn rance is not bothering to learn about anyone or anything other than where you are from. their language. I wonder how many British here in Spain fall into the latter Learning Spanish is difficult, learning the culture takes time

Friday, October 4, 2013

ALL CHANGE IN 2015? It doesn’t matter what the both men will be offering country is and the brand of some kind of electoral bribe politics, governments always have an eye on the next election. Here in Spain, Mariano Rajoy is keen to say that the recession is over, even if there’s a lot of work to be done. He’s almost kick started a two year count down to the next election, whilst in the UK, David Cameron is saying the same things, with just 2 0 months to go before the big vote. T h a t means t h a t

in the next year or so, which will neatly kick in months before the crucial ballots are cast. The bribe nor mally is called a tax cut. It’s the timehon oured tradition of the political system and sometimes vot ers fall for it, and sometimes they don’t. For Rajoy and Cameron, some factors are out of their control, like the perform ance of

the opposition parties, plus there’s one additional headache for the Spanish Prime Minister. The better economic indi cators in Spain, though still with shocking unemployment figures, have been tempered by opinion polls that show the opposition PSOE edging ahead for the first time in years. Edge is the operative word as the Socialist leader, Alfredo Rubalcaba has the same charismafree genes as Mariano Rajoy and has the baggage of his predeces sor Zapatero to deal with: namely the fact that it was the fault of his party and then government for getting Spain into the mess that it is in now. Rajoy has made it clear that he wants to lead the PP into the 2015 elec tion, but that choice may be taken right out of his hands in a courthouse. A judge is continuing to hear the many revelations of the socalled Barcenas affair:

the corruption allegations involving the former PP offi cial, who has directly impli cated under oath that Rajoy and other key politicians took payments from a PP Swiss bank account. The Prime Minister has vigorously denied any wrongdoing, but assuming the economic recovery continues, he can not be totally certain that he’ll be in charge in 2 years time. If private PP polls show that Rajoy is a liability, they’ll dump him like a hot potato, even though he is given a clean bill of health in the Barcenas affair. If he isn’t over that matter, he is fin ished: simple as that, giving the PP the perfect excuse to fire the bullet. For David Cameron, the situation is more complicat ed. Latest polls have pro duced a boost for Labour with an 11% lead, but that was before this week’s Tory gathering in Manchester, with all the extra news publicity that they have received. Cameron has to fight on a

threeway front: he has to attack Labour and Miliband; he has to try to regain lost votes from the Lib Dems; and though they are a joke, UKIP may be no laughing matter if they steal enough votes from the Tories in key marginals that let Labour in. Assuming the economic recovery con tinues, Cameron has one trump card up his sleeve, and that’s his promise of an IN/OUT vote of EU member ship, once he has renegotiat ed new terms. That would spike any thunder from UKIP, and the proEU Lib Dems would have to make the unpopular case on maintain ing the status quo. That leaves Labour, and this must give Cameron a nightmare or two. Is he worried that one day before May 2015, Ed Miliband will steal his clothes and pledge a Labour govern ment to an IN/OUT EU vote? It would be a blinding and popular play from Labour, which could seal Cameron’s fate. But will Ed have the guts to do it?

Friday, October 4, 2013

Diamantes shines on, better RASPBERRY and brighter than ever BROWNIES Diamantes Restaurant and The Border Bar is a family business which has been run by owners Gary and Karla, for over 10 years. We are set in the quiet Spanish town of El Mojon, just off the N332, heading towards Pinatar Arena, and literally yards from the beach. El Mojon is predominant ly occupied by the Spanish in the summer months and has many expats living here all year round. It is a seaside resort, unspoilt by commercialism, and many of our customers say, once they have visited us, that it’s a special place they will always return to. Diamantes cater for English and Spanish clientele, with a varied menu including Prime Steaks, Fresh Fish Pasta, Homemade Burgers and Pizzas, Tapas and Paella with a wide snack menu including English Breakfast. On Sundays we serve Sunday lunch from 1pm till 8pm, with a choice of pork, beef or chicken or a combination of all three; we also

Ingredients 200g dark chocolate, broken into chunks 100g milk chocolate, broken into chunks 250g pack salted butter 400g soft light brown sugar 4 large eggs have lamb for an extra supplement, all served with roast and 140g plain flour mashed potatoes and plenty of fresh vegetables. 3 courses 50g cocoa powder are available for only 9,95 euros. All our desserts are home 200g raspberries made. On Thursdays we have our fish and chip night; Cod Method homemade chips with all the trimmings for only 7,95 euros. 1. Heat oven to 180C/160C fan/gas 4. Line a 20 x 30cm bak The Border Bar also owned by Gary and Karla sits aside ing tray tin with baking parchment. Put the chocolate, butter the restaurant, where you can watch all Sky sports and have and sugar in a pan and gently melt, stirring occasionally with a game of pool, and join in with the great pub atmosphere, a wooden spoon. Remove from the heat. with snacks available from the restaurant. Monday is pool 2. Stir the eggs, one by one, into the melted chocolate mix night at 9.30pm, Tuesday is KARAOKE from 9.30pm and ture. Sieve over the flour and cocoa, and stir in. Stir in half Thursday we have BINGO from 4pm. the raspberries, scrape into the tray, then scatter over the ENTERTAINMENT IS BACK AT DIAMANTES.... after a remaining raspberries. Bake on the middle shelf for 30 mins busy summer we have our entertainment programme back or, if you prefer a firmer texture, for 5 mins more. Cool before in full swing. On October 4th Gemma will be singing Soul slicing into squares. Store in an airtight container for up to 3 and Motown, on the 11th Oct we have Paul Christie, the days. voice of Roy Orbison, Gene Pitney and much more, and on 18th October we have Sandy Fitz with her DIVA show, Adele, Whitney, Duffy and much more. Please call the restaurant for details of future acts. We are now taking bookings for Christmas and New Year please call the restaurant for details. Finally as many of our customers are aware, we have had an eventful and difficult year with many changes and improvements being made. Thank you all for your encour agement and support; we also look forward to meeting our new customers during the coming months.

Friday, October 4, 2013

SUCULENT PRAWN DISHES SPICY PRAWN SOUP Ingredients 1 tbsp sunflower oil 300g bag crunchy stirfry vegetables 140g shiitake mushrooms, sliced 2 tbsp Thai green curry paste 400g can reducedfat coconut milk 200ml vegetable or fish stock 300g medium straighttowok noodles 200g bag large, raw prawns

Method

1. Heat a wok, add the oil, then stirfry the veg and mush rooms for 23 mins. Take out and set aside, then tip the curry paste into the pan and fry for 1 min. 2. Pour in the coconut milk and stock. Bring to the boil, drop in the noodles and prawns, then reduce the heat and simmer for 4 mins until the prawns are cooked through. Stir in the veg, then serve.

TERIYAKI PRAWNS & BROCCOLI NOODLES Ingredients 50ml lowsodium soy sauce

50ml mirin 2 tbsp lemon juice 1½ tbsp caster sugar 200g soba noodles 140g thinstemmed broccoli 140g cooked prawns 1 small red chilli, thinly sliced

Method

In a small saucepan, heat the soy sauce, mirin, lemon juice and sugar. Simmer for 5 mins until syrupy, then remove from the heat. Bring a large saucepan of salted water to the boil, then cook the noodles and broccoli for about 3 mins, adding the prawns a few secs before draining. Divide the mixture between 2 plates, pour the warm teriyaki sauce over the top, sprinkle with the red chilli and serve.

BUTTERY CHILLI PRAWNS Ingredients 25g butter 2 tbsp olive oil 3 garlic cloves, finely chopped 1 red chilli, seeds left in and finely chopped ½ tsp sweet paprika 1220 large raw king prawns with shells juice 1 lemon, plus a few slices for a finger bowl ½ x small bunch parsley, roughly chopped small loaf crusty bread, warmed to serve

Method 1. Melt the butter and oil together in a frying pan. Add the gar lic, chilli and paprika, then fry for 12 mins until starting to turn golden. Turn up the heat, throw in the prawns and fry for a few mins, stirring, until all the prawns turn pink. Take off the heat, season and stir in the lemon juice and parsley. 2. Add some lemon slices to a finger bowl of warm water, grab a bowl for the shells, then dig straight in with your fin gers and hunks of crusty bread.

FLASH-FRIED PRAWNS WITH CHILLI, LEMON & PARSELY Ingredients 2 tbsp extravirgin olive oil 300g large raw prawns, butterflied 2 garlic cloves, thinly sliced or chopped 1 tsp chilli flakes zest and juice 1 lemon 2 tbsp flatleaf parsley, chopped

Method

1. Heat the olive oil in a large frying pan. Season the prawns and set aside. Cook the garlic over mediumlow heat until it just starts to colour. Increase heat to high and add the prawns and chilli. Stir quickly and keep turning prawns in the pan. 2. After 1 min, pour in the lemon juice. Toss until prawns are opaque – about 1 min more. Sprinkle over lemon zest and parsley and serve with crusty bread.

Friday, October 4, 2013

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services com pany on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain seven years ago hav ing left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

TIP: Mike was having problems viewing thumbnail TIP: John wanted to know how to get rid of the Ask.Com images of Adobe Acrobat documents toolbar and settings Dear Richard, problem that I hope you may be able to pro vide an answer to via your excellent advice column in The Courier, as I’m sure many others must have the same very annoying dif ficulty that I am experiencing. I recently upgraded to Windows 7 64 bit from XP Professional (which I really liked). There are many good features in Windows 7 that I do appreciate but the lack of a proper thumbnails view for pdf files is driving me mad! An odd few will display as thumbnails, as will all my jpegs, but most pdf files won’t, even using the Preview Pane. As I work with lots of pdf files I have to manually open each one individually to see the content. I’ve tried everything I can think of but without success, and can only imagine there is a compatibility error with 64 bit. Searches on internet forums etc are confusing. Is there a, hopefully simple, DIY fix please? Many thanks in advance. Mike

Richard, good morn ing, I have been evad ed by www.search.ask.com (Ask.com) on both Google Chrome and Internet Explorer. I have tried to delete them via Internet Options but what ever I do they always come back when I launch Google Chrome and Internet Explorer. My preference is to have www.google.com for both. Can you please advise me about this problem and how to cure it? John

Hi John, the Ask toolbar (and its ilk) tend to be known as PUP (poten tially unwanted pro Hi Mike, I have done some investigation online for you as I have not personally come grams), as they are nei across this issue before. ther really virus's or It seems that there could be two possible resolutions, the first being to ensure that malware, but have Adobe Acrobat Reader is set as the default program, this can be done in Windows 7 by click never the less managed ing Start > Default Programs and setting Adobe Reader to its defaults. This is worth a try, to get themselves however I suspect it will not work in your case. Doing more investigation I found that this has installed on your com been a problem with a number of other users and is related to the 64 bit version of Windows puter surreptitiously. 7 and is related to the preview handler and also thumbnails. Removal of PUP's is You can find more information together with some downloads that should work at the follow usually a matter of firstly removing them from the add/remove programs section of the control ing address.. panel and then removing the traces of their actions (usually a home page change) from the http://www.pretentiousname.com/adobe_pdf_x64_fix browser/s in question. I hope his helps. In your case you can set your home page back to www.google.co.uk in Internet Explorer by going into Tools, Internet Options and in Google Chrome by using the wrench or bars icon office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es (top right hand corner) and then using the settings, on startup section. I hope this helps.

Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to: www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

TIP: Howard wanted to know where the spell checker had gone in Outlook.com

Q A

Sir, I am on windows 7 and email on outlook. Recently I have lost spellcheck when composing emails. Could you help? Howard Hi Howard, you should find that outlook.com automatically underlines misspelt words, to check them you just need to right hand click the word in question.

Friday, October 4, 2013

This week we are going to take a look at protein in our diet. Most people know that protein is essential for health and the most important building block for our bodies but many of us actually eat far more protein than we actually need. 80% of our body composition is deter mined by diet and it is impor tant to maintain our lean body mass in other words our muscles and organs. Another interesting fact is that some proteins are bet ter for the body than others. Red meat is high in animal fat which can be bad for us and apart from being diffi cult to digest can cause our cholesterol to be raised and necessitate the use of statins. Dairy foods are good sources of protein but again not in huge amounts. If you like dairy try and eat free range eggs, natural yogurt which is bio friendly, to help with the intestinal health and butter rather than low fat margarines which con

Friday, September 27, 2013

tain harmful substances called trans fatty acids which can lead to many health prob lems. Don’t feel you need to eat meat at every meal and keep portion sizes smaller. Restraints usually give us twice as much protein foods than we really need and if you add a rich creamy sauce more protein and fat that we need for health. Healthy choices for protein are fish, chicken and turkey, some dairy and grains and pulses. We can easily bulk out, for instance a casserole ,by using less meat and adding beans or pulses making the dish easier to digest, lower in fat and cholesterol and higher in fibre. Protein shakes are a really use ful way of getting the correct amounts of protein without the need for a heavy or large meal. The Cambridge 800 Weight Loss Plan includes a wide range of protein shakes which are really easy to prepare just add the correct amount of water to the pow dered protein give it a good shake and you have an instant meal with only 200 calories, a perfectly bal anced meal in a glass. For more info call 722 219 450 or email i n f o @ s l i m f i t europe.com

HOW IMPORTANT IS SALT IN YOUR DIET?

DR MACHI MANNU’S ADVICE CLINIC Email your questions and comments to contact@medb.es

Your body cannot survive without salt. And human civilization has been shaped to a great extent by salt. In days gone by, before fridges were invent ed, salt was the best natu ral preservative for meat, fish and many other foods. Salt was so valued in roman times that it was used to pay the wages of soldiers. The word salary comes from salt (The Spanish word for salt is sal). Even today, salt is very much in use by the

food industry to enhance the taste and prolong the shelf life of processed foods. The chemical name for salt is Sodium Chloride, and this makes salt the

largest contributor of sodi um to the body. Sodium is the most abundant mineral in the body and plays a role in many vital chemical reactions such as the transmission of signals through nerves and con traction of muscles. However in more recent times, salt has been demo nized especially as a con tributor to hypertension and heart disease. People suf fering from high blood pres sure are generally advised by their doctors to cut out salt from their diet. But how beneficial is this recom mendation? Recently The Institute of Medicine (IOM) – a wellknown internation al organisation was com missioned to review all studies relating to the health effects of Sodium. Their 150 page report con cluded that the current evi dence linking salt to high blood pressure lacks validi ty. According to them, none of the studies used to sup port the argument against salt was properly done. What is worrisome about the report is that people that consumed very little salt were found to be in a worse state of health. Of course taking too much salt will surely poison the body, but not in the quantity needed to add flavour to food. When it comes to salt, sea salt is certainly better than table salt because it contains many more minerals. FOR A FULL BODY SCAN CALL DR MANNU ON 965071745

Friday, September 27, 2013

CHOLESTEROL IS GOOD FOR YOU

My doctor informed me last week that I had high cho lesterol, and he prescribed statins. But I am aware of the dangers of statins, my neighbour takes them and he is nearly crippled. I will like to know what to take in place of statins to control my cholesterol.

You are certainly right about the adverse effects of statins which includes muscle pain and weakness among many others. It is important to realise that the cholesterol check carried out in hospitals is composed of several different component. The total cholesterol reading, which is what is read as low or high, is more or less meaningless without the other readings. These other components are: Triglycerides, LDL (Low density lipopro tein) and HDL (High density lipoprotein). The reality is that these other components are really not cholesterol but proteins that carry cholesterol. HDL is the so called ‘good cholesterol’, and carries cholesterol away from the arteries into the liver. LDL or ‘bad cholesterol’ carries cholesterol from the liver to the arteries. Triglycerides are fatty acids used by the body to generate ener gy. The desirable cholesterol level, which is calculated as an average of the other components varies from place to place. Here in Spain and indeed much of Europe, it is considered nor mal when below 200 mg/dl (5.2mmol/L), but in Russia, normal values are much higher at 250 mg/dl. Indeed many clinical stud ies have shown that people with higher cholesterol levels enjoy a healthier and longer life. Contrary to what the media and the pharmaceutical cartel would have you believe, cholesterol is one of the most important nutrients produced in the body. The human brain is composed of 70% fat and 7% pure cholesterol. Without cholesterol, the body will be unable to produce hormones and many other vital chemicals. For this reason the body produces more cholesterol than we consume through our diet. Cholesterol is absolutely essential for the activities of the nerves and brain, and low levels of cholesterol are associated with neurological problems such as depression, memory loss, nervous disorders,

irritability, insomnia, ADHD and many others. The aim in choles terol management should be to regulate the production of cho lesterol, and not to cut off its production with drugs like statins. Luckily there are 4 Natural very effective agents backed by sev eral clinical studies that can be used to regulate cholesterol in a way that benefits the body without side effects. These agents are Niacin (Vitamin B3, preferably in the form of Inositol), Pantethine (Vitamin B5), Policosanol (from the wax of sugar cane) and Garlic. These agents are certainly preferable to statins because statins completely block the body’s capacity to produce choles terol. Bear in mind that without cholesterol, your body will be unable to perform many vital functions. One of the major prob lems of statin drugs is that in the process of blocking the produc tion of cholesterol, they also block the synthesis of Coenzyme Q10 – a nutrient required by every single cell in your body for generating energy. Without energy, our muscles become weak, and this is why those on statins commonly experience muscle weakness and pain. However natural agents are very subtle in the way they function. Niacin lowers LDL and Triglycerides sig nificantly (up to 25%) and more importantly increases HDL – good cholesterol by 33% However niacin is known to cause skin flushing, and so the preferred form is Inositol, which does not cause skin flushing, and also has other benefits such as improv ing blood flow in intermittent claudication. Pantethine also has significant cholesterol and lipid lowering activity, and is useful for diabetics, unlike niacin which should be used cautiously in dia betics because it can impair sugar levels. Policosanol is my favourite, and I have observed a patients cholesterol drop from 320 to 260mg/dl in 5 weeks while on policosanol. Policosanol has also been shown to improve sugar levels in diabetics. Garlic is another powerful cholesterol lowering agent. The effective dose is about 4 cloves preferably taken raw (if you don’t mind the smell!). Garlic is also available as tablets or capsules. Policosanol from Douglas Laboratories is available from MedB Health Shop, 60 Capsules for 25.22 Euros. Call 965071745.

Delivery is free

Q A

I have metal crowns, and recently read that over time they could leak into your body and cause problems. I will like to know your opinion. There has been a major improvement on the materials used to make dental crowns and metal plates inserted into the body. Most are now made from alloys, which are combinations of several metals, and these alloys have been found to be less toxic than older materials. Today, metal crowns are usually made from alloys of gold, palladium and platinum and cheaper ones from nickel, chromium or beryllium. However there is still the risk of poisoning even with the best of metal alloys because over time they dissolve into the blood stream, and accumulate in the tis sues and organs causing chronic diseases. For this reason, any one wearing metal crowns or has any other kind of metal insert ed in them, should consider having a proper detox with a metal chelator (a substance that binds to heavy metals in the body) at least once a year. Luckily a few years ago, Pectasol was made available to the public as the only oral metal chelator. It is the only oral chelator that has undergone clinical trials and shown to elim inate heavy metals and toxins from the body. Pectasol is made from pectin (the white peel of citrus fruits, making it natural) and studies have shown that it increases the excretion of heavy met als and toxic compounds such as mercury, aluminium and metal alloys by up to 500%. Pectasol has no side effects unlike the only other metal chelator EDTA, which is given intravenously, over many months, at a high cost. Another advantage of Pectasol is that it doesn’t bind to useful metals in the body such as zinc and copper, unlike EDTA that drains the body of these essential min erals. A detox course with Pectasol takes about 4 weeks. Pectasol from Douglas labs is available from MedB Health Shop for 83.98 Euros, delivery is for free. Call 965071745 PLEASE SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO : contact@medb.es or to the editor of the courier.

Friday, October 4, 2013

Tony

Friday, October 4, 2013

HE ALWAYS HAS SOMETHING TO SHOUT ABOUT

Mayes GET REAL ON RED ED’S LIES

Do you know what the worst politicians do when they know they are not the most popular folk around and have a big problem on their hands? They invent a villain, a bogey man which they can rubbish in the eyes of the public, and then promise they will step in and kill the bogey man and make life so much better for the poor "hard working people". Spanish leaders regularly do it, trying to get the Spanish to rally around the flag to grab back Gibraltar whilst Argentinian leaders do it over the Falklands. It gets people united against what is con ceived as a common enemy. Hitler is the classic example of it, successfully persuading the majority of gullible German people that the Jews were responsible for all their ills and he could get the country on its feet again. Vote for him and all would be rosy. And we know exactly what it led to. And now we have that prize ass Ed Miliband doing it at the recent Labour confer ence. His tactic is to try to persuade the public that the worst villains in the world are the energy companies and if people vote Labour he will march in and force the com panies not to raise prices for near on two years. Oh yes, it sounds wonderful in the ears of the Socialist prats who think that everyone who doesn't live in social housing, doesn't claim benefits and has a job, is an enemy of the people! Miliband should, as a Jew, know only too well of the dangers of finding scape goats in society. I've just spent a day touring the Auschwitz and Birkenau con centration camps and gas chambers in Poland, where 1.1 million Jews were mur dered in just four years. Miliband also should know (and clearly he does) that

Britain has imported people from many parts of the world where it is acceptable, but has not done enough to edu cate these people into Western ways. British people going to other countries would very quickly get into serious trouble if they con ducted themselves in a way as to offend the locals. And it's about time that Britain imposed the same restric tions. Put simply:act in a British way or get out! How often have you heard it said that Brits are lazy and not willing to work hard enough or quickly enough, and prefer to spend their lives on benefits? The answer is very often, and, I'm sure you agree with the sen timent unless you are long term unemployed and are finding all manner of excuses as to why. But it doesn't sit too well to hear the same arguments coming from the Bulgarian government which has said Britain needs immi grants to do the tough jobs that British workers just won't do. The Bulgarians argue that immigrants to Britain are far less likely to claim bene fits than Brits because they are harder working and pre pared to work longer hours for less than the locals. And this is why British employers are more likely to welcome them with open arms after all, if a Bulgarian comes to Britain and is pre pared to work hard, he or she will earn five times as much than in their homeland. And that's before they start climb ing up the employment lad der. The fact is that British people have priced them selves out of the labour mar ket and there are millions of others around the world will ing to do more for less. They have been able to do it thanks to Britain's crazy ben efits system which until now has allowed far too many people to get something for

Britain would already have one of the lowest energy costs in Europe, save for the stealth "green" taxes intro duced under the last barmy Labour government, and would be 100 pounds lower than they are now. He also knows that the so called "fat cats" who are benefiting from dividends in the energy com panies are, in reality, receiv ing only a 4% return on their investment and pay tax on that. I'm a "fat cat" sharehold er of one of the energy com panies and am living in the lap of luxury with a dividend of about 50 pounds a year. Come on Miliband, get real! He also knows that energy companies buy fuel on the international market and although they do their best at buying when prices are low, they are still subject to price rises. Miliband also knows that no business can exist if it cannot put its prices up when its costs go up. The result is that the business would be forced to trade at a loss, and a government would be act ing illegally if it forced a busi ness to run at a loss. If it did, it would have to make up the shortfall, and that would

result in taxpayers having to pay the bill. Unless, of course, Labour is bent on nationalisation which it couldn't afford. So Miliband's rabblerousing at the Labour conference, playing to the Socialist brainwashed, was a load of utter nonsense. He knows it, and people with an ounce of common sense know it too. The problem is that there are an awful lot of stupid voters out there who still think that Labour is the best thing since sliced bread conveniently forgetting that Labour presided over the worst recession since the Depression, and took actions which made the debt burden for Britain far worse than it otherwise would have been. I believe Britain is in grave danger with such a weak and incredibly stupid and two faced opposition leader. Disgruntled voters might, just might, vote for him, believing the big lie that he can make Britain better, and God help Britain if they did in sufficient numbers. Because there's a grave danger of power cuts and real financial problems, especially as Britain has one of the worst debt burdens in the world. It really could be a case of the last person leav ing Britain, don't bother to turn the lights off they already will be off through a power cut. Oh, and by the way, the buffoon also wants 16yearolds to have the vote. I remember what I was like at 16, ready to support anything which was anti establishment and against anything that my parents and elders believed. Other than that my interest didn't extend much further than my next date! No wonder that Miliband wants 16yearolds to have the vote, because they are more likely to sup port Socialism. It's only when they have a few more life experiences and get more responsibility that most grow

up politically. Oh yes, finally on the subject of finding scapegoats why not blame the supermarkets for sky high food prices? Why not cap them? And what about the insurance companies? Cap their charges. And train fares, airline tickets, child care costs, housing and building costs? Cap them all. Hang on a minute...isn't this Communism? P.S. I wrote this before I checked out the latest opin ion polls that showed that the stupid British were taken in by Miliband's bull and his rat ings soared. Now I hear the prat is jumping on the idea and thinking about capping food costs. I might as well have written the stupid idiot's script. There was one news item I applauded and that was the news that two men caught spitting in public in Waltham Forest, in NE London were each fined £300. They challenged £80 fixed penalty fines imposed on them, and the council suc cessfully prosecuted them under antilitter legislation, a landmark case in the UK. Spitting in public is a disgust ing and filthy habit. Sadly

nothing. You can't do that for very long hardly anywhere in the world. A perfect example is in the sweat shops in Bangladesh, where a TV pro gramme last week highlight ed the plight of people work ing in factories for up to 16 hours a day for a pittance in wages and are even locked into the factories so they can't get out until the working day is over. And it's all to pro duce clothes to sell at low cost in the West. The sweat shops even have two sets of books one reality and the other to show Western buy ers. No wonder millions of Bangladeshis want to move to Britain where the streets are paved with gold and peo ple have the money to buy the clothes that they produce for pennies. Spain is considering changing the clocks so that it will no longer be one hour ahead of GMT in winter and two hours ahead in sum mer. The clocks went forward in Franco's era to bring the clocks in line with Germany. But experts think bringing the clocks in line with those in the UK will help reduce fuel bills, especially in winter and help people be more healthy by living more in line with sunshine hours rather than what the clocks say. For Brits it will mean the soap lovers won't have to wait until 8.30pm to watch Eastenders or Corrie and we won't have to wait until 10pm to see more meaningful stuff which cannot be screened until the 9pm watershed. It will, how ever, mean lighter mornings and darker evenings. Still, you can't have everything! Finally, hats off to Cameron for pushing ahead with giving tax bene fits to married couples and civil partners. It won't be a massive amount, but it will be something to make a state ment that the best thing for society is to encourage sta ble relationships, preferably in marriage, especially when children are involved. There used to be tax advantages in being married. I can remem ber a tax rebate when I got hitched and tried to work out the best date when the tax rebate would be the greatest benefit. Sadly, successive left of centre governments have eroded the sanctity or meaning of marriage, making it progressively easier to get a divorce, so that now a mar riage certificate for many is practically worthless. No sur prise, is it, that Labour is pouring scorn on the idea. What does their opposition to Cameron’s plan tell you about the barmy left?

Friday, October 4, 2013

No more run in the sun Imagine sitting in the hot Spanish sun with your face beau tifully madeup but free from the fear of melting streaks of colour running down your cheeks. Or just think of jumping in a pool without a moment’s worry that your waterproof eyelin er will turn out not to be. Better still, envisage waking up look ing just as good as when you went to bed. This freedom to look good ALWAYS is just what advanced semipermanent makeup specialist June Hutchinson gives her clients. June, has worked in the beauty industry for many years, and trained in the art of semipermanent makeup with world acknowledged experts Finishing Touches. With semipermanent makeup, June can define eye brows, draw in eyeliner and put subtle definition back into lips. June also offers medical tattooing and nonlaser tattoo removal.

Hair loss? It’s all grow at Margaretha‘s! IF you're feeling selfconscious or worried about hair loss, Salon Margaretha is here to help you with practical nofuss solutions that will help restore your hair health and feeling of wellbeing and confidence. Their 20 years experience ensures that you are in trustworthy, professional hands and their completely private consultation offers unrivalled advice, personalised treatment and tailormade hair replacement solutions. Their wide range of wigs and prosthetic hair pieces is so natural that it's impossible to tell them from real hair and their cutting and styling expertise ensure that your look is completely 'your own'. If you need any help in connection with hair loss, contact Margaretha herself on 966 921 846 at her clinic. (She spe cialises in alopecia and disruptions in hair growth due to ill ness, injury, hormone imbalances and chemo/radiotherapy treatments).

Glamorous has it all

Glamorous is Playa Flamenca’s onestop shop for making women look that extra bit special. Under the new manager, Dawn, you can pop in and have all your beauty needs looked at. With 7 years in the business including owning a beauty salon back in Kent in England, Dawn is looking forward to working with you on all aspects of making you look glamorous and gorgeous. She’s a fully qualified advanced hair technician and that means you can have hair extensions from just 280 Euros, as well as eyelash extensions, plus spray tans from 15 Euros and ear piercing from 5 Euros. And Glamorous has it all nailed…literally, as Dawn is a nail specialist dealing in nail art, hairbrush nail art, sculptured nails, gel nails, acrylic and stiletto nails! And that’s not all, as Glamorous offers a large selection of ladies clothes, shoes, bags, belts, watch es and jewellery Just drop into the shop and be pampered at the Flamenca Beach Commercial Centre, which is open on weekdays between 10.30am to 4.00pm and 8pm to 11pm as well as Saturdays from 11.00am to 2.00pm. Now opened Mens clothing department.

Lynda and Lauren’s slim fit plan

Mum and daughter Lynda Gibson and Lauren Shakespeare like to keep business in the family and they want you to stay nice and fit: Slim Fit in fact! They used to be involved with Medaesthetics at Punta Prima, but they’ve branched out in a dif ferent direction, having been awarded the “Leading Sponsors Cambridge 800 Weight Loss Plan 2013” for the whole of Spain. That’s given them the boost they needed to expand on this side of their already hugely successful business. With an impressive deck of skills, experience and qualifica tions, Lynda has just been awarded a Distinction in her Diploma in diet and nutrition, and now with Lauren, they’ve opened up Slim Fit Europe which is a nutrition, weight management and image consultancy. It means they can use all their nutrition and aesthetic experience to help people across the area, and though they still offer aesthetics via the various cosmetic surgeons they have worked with in recent years, the two ladies are now running spe cialist diet and health clinics at the Sophia Wellness Centre in Cabo Roig. Call 722 219 450 or email info@slimfiteurope.com

Enjoy Some Celebrity Treatment with Sue Sue Whittemore is a qualified, experienced beauty therapist & chiropodist who has been working in Spain for 11 years. She is based at Viva Hair Design, a friendly, popular and busy salon in the El Galan area of Orihuela Costa. One of Sue’s most popular treat ments is the 14 day Shellac manicure. This manicure has a celebri ty following including Lady Gaga & Rhianna and was used by all the female skaters in the last series of Dancing on Ice. It is proving very popular with clients who are looking for chip free, manicured nails for cruises, holidays, weddings & other occasions. It applies like polish, has no dry time as its UV cured, wears flawlessly for 14 days of high gloss shine and is removed in minutes. In fact some clients have had chip & smudge free nails for up to 4 weeks! In addition to providing chiropody services at the salon, Sue offers a home visiting Chiropody service covering the Orihuela Costa, San Miguel de Salinas, Pilar de la Horadada, Torrevieja and Ciudad Quesada areas. For information about beauty & chiropody services you can contact Sue at Viva Hair Design on 966 774 956 or for a chiropody home visit contact Sue on 609 377 982.

Friday, October 4, 2013

An estate agent for life Having lived in Spain for more than 25 years and run a successful estate agent, Peysu, since 1993, Susanne Seiler is an expert not just in the property market but also in helping people make the smooth transition to a new life in Spain. She believes that selling a house doesn’t stop the minute the customer signs on the dotted line, and for her providing a good after sales service is just as important as helping cus tomers find their perfect property. Susanne offers her customers a complete legal package, including property registering and transfer of utility bills. But it doesn’t stop there. Many people who have bought a house through Susanne stay with her for years as she helps them prepare wills, make tax declarations and get the best house insurance. She has just had 20 years celebration which she celebrated with her clients and collaborators. Of course, you don’t have to have bought your house through Susanne to get these great services.

The store that’s ready made for you

If you’re looking for any household goods, then why don’t you drop into the new look Ready Made Curtain and Bedding Store at the Los Dolses Commerical Centre, Villamartin. Under new owner, Sarah Turley, business is booming and the shop also has the added bonus of an instore sewing service. With all kinds of home items from quality well established UK and Spanish suppliers, the product choice has improved and will continue to do so weekly! From oven gloves to mattresses, you can lay your hands on a comprehensive selection that your home cannot do without. Everything is carefully handpicked by Sarah, who with her previous experience of running a successful business, means that she works closely with the sup pliers, bringing the most up to date products and ranges, and of course the best possible prices! Her commitment to offering an hon est service to her customers is vital along with an attention to detail to stock the best items. The sales team look forward to meeting you soon as you check out a friendly and helpful shopping experience. The store is open Monday to Friday, 10.00am to 5.30pm and on Saturday between 10.00am and 4.00pm. You’ll find them at the Los Dolses Commercial Centre next to Cardmania.

Cup cake Queen expands If you are yearning for some traditional cakes and a wonderful cup of tea or coffee, then check out the brand new café that is Truly Scrumptious at the Flamenca Beach Commercial Centre, Playa Flamenca. Owned by Bev, who has built up a great repu tation for her cakes at the Zoco Sunday Market, you can now try a wide selection of her goodies that will simply get you coming back for more! Why not pop in to try her large selection of cup cakes, pies, sandwiches, and wraps as well as ice creams and milk shakes. Bev also specialises in making the perfect cake for that special birthday or wedding, all made to order. She provides and makes buffets, children's cupcake parties, ladies’ afternoon teas full of fun either at home or in a bar which can be a unique taster to a hen night celebration! Also every Thursday afternoon, Bev will be serving her famous cream teas with a selection of sandwiches, cakes, tea and coffee for only 7 Euros between 1pm and 4pm (Booking advisable) Give her a call on 671 146 989 and see what she can do for you.

Customers come first at Timeless Every customer that comes to Timeless Fashions in Punta Prima has a different fashion need and we are here to help that discerning buyer. We are a team of five with myself Joy; the owner Katherine; along with Lynne, Sharon and Jane, trying to bring fashion colour and style to all our shoppers! Perhaps you are looking for a special occasion or just a simple day to day item, and you’ll find the full range of sizes from small to plus, we stock brands like Saloos, Addini, Casa Mia and many more! Fashion shows are something we really enjoy doing for our chosen charities and our models are all customers who give up their time to put on a very enjoyable afternoon. The catwalk is being laid out next on Friday October 25th and we hope you will come and see what we get up to! We really do want to hear what you think about our range as our customer service is our number one priority. I’m celebrating a year since I took over Timeless Fashions, and I’m really looking forward to seeing what the next twelve months has in store for us!

A cut above the rest! The Barber Shop based in Consume Square in La Marina Urb opened it´s doors in March 2007 as a Traditional Gent´s Hairdresser. Carina, the owner who has doing Gents Barbering since 1997 and has won 2 Awards for her skills in Earl's Court, London has developed The Barber Shop into a Unisex Hairdresser offering cuts, colours, blow dries, perms etc. As the business grew Carina was joined by Carol, who has also been in the hairdressing business for over 30 years. Their next recruit was Miller, an experienced Gent´s Barber and last year Michael, a Unisex Hairdresser joined the team. The Barber Shop has been well supported over the last 6 years and clients continue to return time and time again. The Barber Shop has a relaxed, friendly atmosphere and strives to please it´s clients. The Salon is open 6 days a week from 10am until 5pm and Carina is available between 2pm and 5pm Monday to Friday. Just walk in or call for an appointment on Tel: 600 720 994.

Friday, October 4, 2013

Prost! - ein Toast!

On Sunday 29th September it was da Vincis bistro, San Luis, Lakeside 4th Year Anniversary Party Sue, Nigel & Luke would like to thank all of Our Wonderful Customers for

The old oompah and lederhosen has come out at La Zenia to celebrate the 200th anniversary of Munich’s world famous Oktober Bier Fest. Bavarian beer and German atmosphere were the order of the day at De Bassus Restaurant as the steins were raised in the air on a regular basis, and hopefully not too many hangovers!

Oktoberfest lasts 17 days and an estimat ed 6 million enjoy the occasion. The beer is stronger than the average tipple. Those who can’t ‘take their beer’ are known as beir leichen or beer corpses, with the La Zenia customers showing a good deal more restraint in celebrating this now worldwide event.

supporting us for the Last 4 years, It was a brilliant day with over 150 peo ple turned up to celebrate our 4th year of success. Many Thanks to Everyone

BUDDY’S BACK

DANCING PINK

Maria and the Pink Ladies and the AECC Cancer Charity are getting all lively this Sunday October 6th with an “All Day Dance Explosion” at the Grand Design House, Casa La Pedrera near

Torremendo. There’ll be dance demon strations all day, as well as a chance to make an allimportant appointment for the early cancer detection programme for men and women.

Popular local rockers, Woody and the Peckers will be back bashing out the hits of Buddy Holly in aid of the Smile Charity

Group. The band is return ing to the El Alto La Dolores in Guardamar for a fundraiser this Wednesday October 9th,

with the cost at just 10 Euros which includes a BBQ meal. For more details and tickets, phone 692 866 536

BOWLED OVER

LIONS ROAR AGAIN The Torrevieja Costa Lions Club is fully back into the swing of the autumn after a successful summer which saw over 5 thousand Euros being raised for ALPE in Torrevieja. The Lions are hoping to raise sufficient funds to be able to help those in need in Torrevieja, San Miguel and Rojales. The new burst of fund raising kicked off with a fun race night at the Courtyard Bar Restaurant in Los Balcones which netted 363 Euros, with the pro ceeds going to Torrevieja’s homeless charity, Reach Out.

Happy Birthday Donna Best Wishes from all of us at The Courier Newspaper

Any bar owner/landlord who would like to hold such an event on their premises should contact Iain on 966 731 495, or idsbennett@hot mail.co.uk. The Lions are also more than happy to hold a charity race night at any local venue.

Bowlers from across Europe have been in the area for the last week to take part in the European Bowls Union team championship at the Emerald Isle Bowls Club at La Florida on the Orihuela Costa as well as the San Miguel Bowls club. Over 250 people from 9 countries competed in the tournament that takes place every 2 years.

MONTESINOS CELEBRATES Los Montesinos is in a party mood as it commemo rates the 125th anniversary of the patronage of the Virgen del Pilar. There’s a wide variety of special events around the town until Saturday October 12th including a soapbox derby race this Sunday. More details are available via www.losmontesinos.org/agen da.php. Souvenir programmes can be bought from the Town Hall at 3 Euros, with the Mayor, José Manuel Butrón (pictured 2nd left) hopeful that all the events will be well supported.

Friday, October 4, 2013

SOLD TO THE MAN The swimming Stewarts AT THE BACK

Torrevieja swimmers Adam and Lucy Stewart may be back in Britain at the moment, but that’s not kept the brother and sister duo out of the pools there! They took part in the DSE South East competition at the Quays complex in Southampton which is a meeting for swimmers with all kinds of dis Over 400 Euros was raised for the APAH Animal Rescue charity at a charity auction at the Iceland store in San Javier. With 80 lots on offer there was a great deal of variety, from a bread maker to binoculars and a din ing table and chairs through to a didgeridoo! The Auctioneer was Peter Fryer who is a longtime staunch supporter of APAH. He

has two exAPAH dogs and has played in several bands, all of whom have been involved with APAH fundraising events in recent years. Not many of the 80 lots were left unsold by the end, with those left over now being sold in the two charity shops in Pilar de la Horadada and San Miguel de Salinas.

abilities. Lucy got 3 personal bests in her events, matched by Adam in his races which were far shorter than the long distance events that he is used to! Both Adam and Lucy are part of the CSSC/ Masters club and are looking forward to some local and regional competitions in 2014.

ROJALES RUN

Torrevieja’s Arabian nights

Torrevieja is hosting a brand new International Arabic Dance Festival this weekend, which will feature performances at the Municipal Theatre. Tonight(Friday) sees a gala show featur ing top Spanish dancers, with ticket prices for the 9.30pm show costing just 10 Euros. Then the weekend finishes on Saturday night at 9.30pm with a special performance featuring teachers who have been leading special master classes at the Hotel La Laguna in Dona Pepa, Quesada. Tickets for both nights are still available from www.instanticket.es and the Municipal Theatre box office.

The streets of Rojales will be getting a pounding tomorrow (Saturday October 5th) with the 11th staging of the Villa de Rojales run. It will start and finish at the Malecón del Soto by the River Segura in the town centre, with a new feature being categories for veterans and juve nilejuniors (born between 1994 and 1997). The runs will be split into two sections with the first one starting at 5:30pm, with the children's races, followed by the main race at 7.00pm.

Friday, October 4, 2013

UK HEADLINES

PERU DRUGS MULES BACK IN COURT

BRITISH drug mules Melissa Reid and Michaella Daily Connolly made their first court appearance Tuesday since being told prosecutors were not ready to accept their guilty pleas. The pair were hauled back to a makeshift court room in a men's prison in Lima to face more ques tions about the gang that sent them to Peru to pick up £1.5 million of cocaine. Melissa, from Lenzie near Glasgow, and Michaella, from Dungannon, Co Tyrone, were asked to expand on statements they made last week in court after confessing to trying to smuggle the drugs back to Europe. Prosecutors had refused to agree to a deal giving them a shorter prison sentence unless they gave them more information about the drugs trafficking gang and admitted they were not forced to Peru at gunpoint. The women, both 20, insist they were coerced into smuggling drugs for fear of their lives by Colombians they met in Ibiza where they were working over the summer. Under Peruvian law the deal they were hoping to strike is called an early termination process and would mean they would automatically receive a sixyear eight month jail sen tence, an eighth off the minimum sentence for drugs traffick ing of eight years. A spokesman for Callao Criminal Court number four which is investigating the women, confirmed last night the pair had appeared in a private hearing before a judge. The spokesman said: "This morning, in one of the rooms of Sarita Colonia men's prison, Michaella Connolly and

Mirror

Melissa Reid amplified their statements. "The hearing in front of judge Pedro Miguel Puente Bardales took place because on September 25 state pros ecutors asked in writing that before the early termination hearing which had originally been scheduled for yesterday, the defendants expand on their court statements. "The court arranged for that to happen. "A week ago both women had accepted their guilt for the crimes they were accused of, showing their repentance and asking at the same time to be accepted within the early ter mination process. Yesterday's hearing was private." It was not clear last night what the women said during the hearing. Prosecutors were not available for comment.

It is thought prosecutors will now take time to review the women's expanded statements before deciding if they are ready to strike a deal. If they still feel the women are holding back information, they will force them to go to trial where they could face up to 15 years in jail if found guilty. As part of their carrot and stick approach, they have also hinted they could be free by Christmas if they agree to collaborate in bringing to justice the drugs gang that sent them to Peru. Speaking before yesterday's hearing, chief state prosecutor Juan Mendoza Abarca said: "What the girls have said so far is not enough. "We want to get to the men behind them and we want more information off them to do that. "It's not enough to say you've killed someone and not say how or why. "All these girls have said is 'We're guilty' and very little else. "They've given a fourline statement to the court which doesn't help us track down the gang that sent them to Peru in the first place. "For the women to benefit from the early termination pro cedure and receive a reduced prison sentence, all sides including state prosecutors have to be in agreement. "As things stand at the moment with the information the women have given the court, we don't agree to them bene fitting from the early termination process." Melissa and Michaella returned to their remand prison after the hearing.

Man eats nothing but raw meat and brushes teeth with animal fat

Derek Nance from Lexington, Kentucky, has revealed he uses animal fat to brush his teeth and is training to become a butcher. He says he never tires of eating the same thing, claiming the "idea of cooked meat no longer appeals". Speaking to VICE, the blood thirsty eater described how he stumbled across his stomach churning diet. Almost six years ago doctors feared he had a food allergy when everything he ate made him sick. After searching the internet and giving up wheat and dairy foods, he recalled meeting a man who

recommended a carnivo rous diet known as the Palaeolithic diet, also called the caveman diet. "I'd been sick for such a long time that I was willing to give anything a try. "I had a couple of goats in my yard that I was using for milk and you know, I was tired of milking them so I slaughtered them. "I ate both of those goats, all raw, and just switched over like that. Despite experiencing diarrhoea Derek's system adapted to his meatheavy diet and within three

weeks there was no turning back. "I noticed this real strong blood like taste in the back of my throat and then all of a sudden I started getting strong cravings for it."

To make matters even weirder, Derek's girlfriend is a VEGETARIAN! “I had a couple of goats in my yard that I was using for milk and you know, I was tired of milking them so I slaughtered them” Joanne admits she has tried her lover's diet in the past but, wisely, decided to stick with greens. She said: "We had lamb tenderloins once and they were delicious, but I'm a vegetarian for compassionate reasons." Not everyone is so understand ing about Derek's tastes though

with the former electrician claim ing his family think he is "insane". "Eating raw meat is just some thing they can't accept. My father has a master's in biology and he tells me that if I eat raw meat I'll get some sort of pathogen." While most people weigh up their meals on cost, availability and Derek choses his dinner on what animal is easier to slaugh ter. He says cows take up too much room in his car and so he prefers to stick with lamb. The animals are butchered in his basement and the remains stored in the fridge.

Friday, October 4, 2013

UK HEADLINES

WORKING? IT'S A MUG'S GAME'

AN unemployed mother of six who lives on benefits and has just moved into a £150,000 fourbedroom council house has boasted on Facebook about her taxy payerfunded lifestyle.

Daily Mail

Neither Maggie Flisher, 26, nor her husband Gavin, 31, have worked since the birth of their first child in 2005, and instead the couple collect around £27,000 a year in benefits. Now Mrs Flisher, who claims that she is 'superfer tile' which makes contraception impossible, has gloated shamelessly on the internet about 'haters' who criticise her statesubsidised life. She wrote that working was 'a mug's game', adding: 'Why work when I can legally take your hard earned money and you can't say s*** to me?' In a series of provocative messages on the social networking site, Mrs Flisher, who says depression prevents her from getting a job, suggested those whom she said were 'jealous' of her many benefits should do the same.

She said critics who wanted a bigger house should ask the government for one, suggesting that that was what they were there for, and said that she, who hasn't worked since

The easyJet crime wave

CRIMINAL gangs from Romania are targeting European cities by flying in on lowcost airlines to com mit their crimes before returning home 'in time for tea', the director of Europol has warned. Rob Wainwright described the gangs as 'petty criminals operating across multiple jurisdictions', adding that they are active across Europe, it was reported today. He warned that criminals are flying in and out of a country in just one day, mak ing it hard for local police. Europol said that police cooperation is vital if the so called 'easyJet crime wave' is to be halted, The Times reported. The main crimes being carried out are thought to be

cardskimming and pick pocketing. Gangs from Romania and Bulgaria are thought to be responsible for 90 per cent of all cardskimming crimes in Europe, according to Europol. Europol has identified 240 organised crime gangs from Romania, which account for 6.7 per cent of all criminal networks active in Europe, the Times reported. Mr Wainwright told the newspaper: 'We have this travelling criminal gang phe nomenon that has become much more prevalent in the

last three or four years; gangs from Lithuania, gangs from Poland, gangs from Romania that are operating in 20 or more European countries. 'They fly on lowcost air lines, do a few hits in one city and get back in time for tea. 'It's very different for the local police to respond to that.' Europol believes that the threat from Romanian gangs will not rise significantly when restrictions on the type of work Romanians and Bulgarians can do in the UK are lifted in January.

she was 21, had had enough of working. In another post, she boasted of enjoying a mid week night out at her local pub, saying: 'Just been out and got STEAMING... love spending all my money that you HATERS don't', the Sun reported. And in another post, she boasted that what she was doing was perfectly legal, and suggested those who were outraged by it were simply envious. The Flishers have just moved into a spacious ter raced house after complaining for years that their old onebedroom council flat in Maidstone, Kent, was too small. Last month the jobless couple moved in to the housing association house in Tovil with children Lacieann, eight, Elektra, six, Gavin Jr, five, Lilyrose, two, and sixmonthold twins Paris Nicole and Martin James. Mrs Flisher said most of her pregnancies were a result of contraceptive failure she said she had tried, and been let down by, the Pill, condoms, arm implants and a con traceptive injection.

ON YER BIKE

A chubby bike thief got more than he bargained for when he was chased and cornered by 15 basketball players. The bicycle had been left unsecured outside a church in Bristol while its owner went to play basketball with friends on a nearby court. The portly crook grabbed the bike and rode past its owner and his friends who noticed, shouted and gave chase. The tubby criminal swore and made hand gestures toward the group as he cycled away. Yet his heavy build did not lend itself to a quick away and he found himself being chased by 15 fit basketball players. The players pursued the lardy thief until he was physically exhausted and strug gled to pedal any further. To add to his woes, he had chosen a cul desac as his getaway route so was

forced to stop and admit defeat. The basketball team detained the thief and then called police. Officers from Avon and Somerset Constabulary arrived and arrested a 22 yearold man who admitted the offence and was cautioned. Pc Ben Jeffries said: "Whilst the circum stances of this man's attempt to steal are bike are quite funny, we shouldn't forget that bikes are easy pickings for thieves if they're not secured properly."

Friday, October 4, 2013

SPANISH NEWS

CANARIES TO COPY GIB? The Canary Islands' government has applied to the United Nations to be 'decolonised' from Spain. Although the archi pelago, some 100 kilometres off the coast of Morocco and nearly a fourhour flight from most of the mainland, does not want to become a separate country in the same way as the northern region of Catalunya wishes to do, it says it is fed up with being 'colonised'. The independent political party Vecinos Unidos Canarios ('Canarian Residents United') has applied to the UN Petitions Committee to be included in its list of 'autonomous decolonised territories'. This list includes Gibraltar, which is Britishowned, plus French Polynesia, the Virgin Islands, Bermuda and Western Sahara. According to VUC, Spain has the Canaries 'colonised' under the 'guise' of its being one of the 17 autonomous regions with its own federal gov ernment. Despite this, the region does not have the jurisdiction to manage its own resources, the party says in a letter to the UN, “What sort of federal region has no control over its coastal waters, its territory, its economic sectors, its taxes, its airspace, its 'floating' population – in short, no control over anything?” VUC says the Canaries have 'a wealth of immense

NO NEW TAX HIKES

resources' that could make the region thrive in economic and social terms, but that it is crippled by having to shell out between four and five billion euros a year to the central gov ernment's tax authorities. As a result of this, up to 50 per cent of Canarian residents live below the poverty line, the letter claims.

The two million dollar men Two maintenance workers on the Madrid metro found a wallet last week containing a cheque for two million US dollars. It had become jammed in the doors of the Line 5 train when they failed to close properly due to a technical fault which was at the Diego de León station at the time. The carriage was taken to the workshop in Canillejas and, once there, mechanics found a brown leather wallet trapped in the shaft where

the sliding door was fitted. They checked the contents of the wallet to try to find out whom it belonged to and dis covered a driving licence, several credit cards and a cheque for two million dol lars, all in the name of a man from California. The mechan ics handed the wallet to the security department at the station and they handed it in to the National Police at the central Puerta Del Sol metro station to arrange to return it to the owner.

As expected, Spain’s 2014 Budget has no new taxes or increases on cur rent ones, but the increases in Company Tax and Income Tax introduced last year are maintained. The annual fee known as Impuesto sobre Sociedades, payable by all limited or pub liclimited companies, remains at the highest level ever, as does personal tax on income from work, invest ments or property. According to finance minister Cristóbal Montoro, the 2014 budget is 'rigorous, austere and com mitted to reducing the State deficit'. He says it has a 'marked social welfare emphasis' and that as result of the last two budgets, will 'open the door'

to new jobs being created. Public sector workers' salaries will continue to be frozen, Montoro reveals. The State will claw back a further 2.4 per cent next year, of which 2.7 per cent from IVA, or VAT, and 5.4 from Impuesto sobre Sociedades. Next year's budget will include a 21.5 percent increase in grants – for education, research and similar purposes – and 17.1 per cent extra in the arts, particularly in theatre. Some 30 billion will be invested in paying unemployment bene fits. The government claims Spain's economy will grow by 0.7 per cent next year and the jobless total will con tinue to fall.

When I tap the dashboard…

Two learner drivers were given a quick failure by their driving examiner after their instructor tried to strangle him. The instructor in Granada had taken two of his pupils for their test and was asked by the examiner, after getting into the car to fit the 'sound and light radar' normally used to detect when the instructor needs to hit the dual controls to prevent an accident.

The accused said he had unplugged it, it was in the glove box and that if the examiner did not wish to test his pupils, 'that was up to him'. The exam iner said he would report the instruc tor to Trafico and tried to get out of the car, to abandon the test, but the instructor reportedly tried to stop him from doing so and grabbed his neck hard, threatening to kill him. He was rescued by a pupil who held

off the instructor, but as the examiner ran away the instructor chased after him. Finally he was held down by another driving instructor at the test centre who described the accused as 'absolutely beside himself'. The exam iner was taken to a nearby health cen tre and given painkillers and muscle relaxants, with injuries confirmed by doctors as being caused by attempt ed strangulation.

Friday, October 4, 2013

SPANISH NEWS

DID DEADLY SECRET KILL 12 YEAR OLD? A 44 year old mother has been denied bail in a case which has seen her accused of killing her Chinese born 12 year old adopted daughter. The story has gripped the Spanish media, with Rosario Porto, being charged with “homicide, possible murder” while await ing the results of toxicological tests on her daughter’s body. After a threeandahalfhour hearing, the judge ordered that Porto, a lawyer, be imprisoned without bail. Her exhusband, journalist Alfonso Basterra, 49, appeared in court shortly afterwards facing similar charges related to his daughter’s death. The body of the girl, Asunta Yong Fang Basterra Porto, was discovered in the early hours of September 22nd in woodlands close to Santiago de Compostela, just hours after her parents had reported her missing. Newspapers and television talk shows have devoted intense coverage to each turn of the case against the parents, who reportedly adopted their daughter in China when she was a baby. Last week, the pair were shown on national television being led in handcuffs to their respective homes in the centre of Santiago de Compostela for police searches. Small crowds of onlookers gathered, some hurl ing insults at the father and the mother, a Spanish citizen who acted as French honorary consul in the northwestern region of Galicia from 19962006. The paternal grandfather of the girl says he believes the mother did it. And police are investigating whether the child

knew of some family secret relating to the multimillion inher itance from her grandparents on her mother's side, who died within seven months of each other. Asunta Basterra's blog has also been read by the police and is said to contain 'dis turbing' information including a piece of fiction written by her which relates to family members killing each other for money. An art history lecturer at Santiago de Compostela University, María del Socorro Ortega Romero, and her hus band Francisco Porto, 88, a retired lawyer, both died of what were presumed to be natural causes, and were found in bed

and were cremated. Their last will and testament had been drawn up in 1975, leaving numerous properties including a luxury villa l to their daughter Rosario Porto. But police are trying to work out whether the elderly couple had attempted to make changes leaving some or all of their property to Asunta. Paternal grandfather Ramón Basterra, interviewed on Telecinco says his son Antonio, Asunta's father and Rosario's exhusband, had called him to break the news that his granddaughter had been found dead. He was said to be very distressed and kept insisting her mother had nothing to do with it: “Charo is not at fault for any of this.” “I still suspect she was behind it, and Antonio cov ered it up,” Sr Basterra Senior said. “I believe my son is innocent – there must have been some coincidence that led him to be charged. “But I do believe Rosario's parents' inheritance was behind their own deaths. There was a lot of money there.” Ramón Basterra says if the parents had anything to do with Asunta's murder, it 'must have been a moment of madness, of depression'. Police have already revealed that the girl's mother was taking tranquilisers for panic attacks and these were found in Asunta's system during the postmortem. A piece of rope found near the body matched a reel of orange cord found in Rosario's house, and a cigarette butt of the same brand her father smokes was seen nearby.

Messi and son face judge House carve

Barcelona footballer Lionel Messi appeared in court last Friday to answer tax dodging charges of over 4 mil lion Euros. Dressed in a dark jacket and white shirt, the 26yearold Argentine international made no comment before or after the closeddoor hearing at a court in Gava, the coastal suburb of Barcelona where he lives. Testimony by the four time winner of the FIFA World Player of the Year award revealed his desire to resolve the matter, Messi's

lawyer, Cristobal Martel, told reporters after the hearing. "It showed little intent to defraud and great intent to resolve the situation with the tax office instead of entering

into a bitter battle with the state," the lawyer said. Crowds of reporters and fans gathered outside the court where first Messi's father Jorge Messi and then

the player himself were quizzed on charges of evading tax on the striker's image rights to the tune of 4.16 million Euros. They have denied wrongdoing, pointing the finger at a former agent of the player. The court said Jorge Messi paid the tax authorities 5 mil lion Euros in August the 4.16 million euros claimed by the tax man plus interest which is likely to significantly reduce any sentence should they be found guilty.

up turns nasty A 39yearold man has confessed to killing his younger brother with a hammer, cutting up the body and putting the remains in the freezer after an acri monious house share that lasted for a year. The sus pect, Palma in Majorca, was detained after he volun tarily turned up at a police station to confess. Officers accompanied him to his home, where they found two freezers with bone and organic remains as well as sections of the body. Police said the man could not remember when the crime had actually been committed. The suspect told police his 32year old brother had moved in with him about a year ago, leading to heated quarrels. "In one of those arguments in the home, the brother took a hammer and tried to assault the detainee, who snatched the weapon and aimed several mortal blows at the (victim's) head," police said.

Friday, October 4, 2013

Horrorscopes Aries March 21 April 19 Anvils, molten steel, but not oversized ham mers, are moderately starred this week, as are oversized hats and trombones. Women who inadvertently purr and men who grunt are badly starred particularly in the shower. Beware the tolling of the bell for which you previously asked who it tolled for. Nothing good will come of it.

Taurus April 20 May 20 Your rugged Taurean good looks and widely acknowledged effortlessness in any heroic encounters, are set to mark this week as one of mayhem set at bay. Avoid your newfound urge to fly building to building, back flips and running fast at high altitudes especially when fighting any bald or shaven headed foes.

Gemini May 21 June 20 Drinks in tall elegant glasses that are served automatically with cherries and olives are perfectly starred at last, follow ing a period of poor planetary attention. Hangovers in particular are set to lessen by up to 0.4% as the week progresses with Jupiter picking up the celestial tab.

Cancer June 21 July 22 A movie with an overwhelmingly blue hue which involving lots of blue sea, topless ness and women in bikinis, are well starred, particularly for our Bermuda and Hawaiian readers. Geronimo!, Yahoo! and Wackoff! are all now internet adopted exclamations you should treat with care until the cock crows for the 20th of October.

By Pandora Leo July 23 August 22 This week the newly rested Saturn is set to teach you that, as your age progresses in the inadvertent as well as professional stunt industry, the successful fall is the one in which you successfully hide the full pain you are in at the end of it. Nobody wants to hear the kind of 'aaarrgghhhh' of honest excruciating pain regardless of what they may claim.

Virgo August 23 September 22 On the positive side, somebody's amaz ingly bad fortune is about to provide you with a piece of well needed good fortune this week. Luckily you have no idea the pain your good fortune has been won from the misfortunes of others. Running in designer clothes on sandy Malibu type beaches is about to become a way of life, you glamorpuss you.

Libra September 23 October 22 A quest over mountainous terrain, icy slopes and/or watery crevices are abjectly undesirably starred, especially when sweepy classical orchestral music with a lacklustre urgentness is playing in the background. Take an mp3 player and play hip hop with a loudness as if your very life depends on it.

Scorpio October 23 November 21 Neck and back pains aside, shouting and wailing are about to become a way of life particularly on Tuesdays. A sinister man with a milky eye is set to provide moments of abject terror when you drop your keys in the street on Thusday.

Sagittarius November 22 December 21 Flushing the toilet on Friday could be mis construed by aliens from another planet or UFOs flying past the window at the time. Flush quickly and confidently to avoid unwelcome attention and difficult to dis lodge metallic probes. Inhibitions may help you avoid an embarrassing incident involv ing water filled balloons and topless wait resses on monday

Capricorn December 22 January 19 Power pack Abs planetary tip: 1000 sit ups a day will, over time, give you a ripped ab physique that will be welcomed by any self respecting Men's Health cover magazine editor... but the down side of this is that sit ups mean looking at your knees a lot something to think about in the months it will take to make your abs as hard as your elbows...

Aquarius January 20 February 18 Cartoons in the newspapers may have a message around Wednesday involving a dog out for a walk, or a man in a big flap py cap, or a caveman with long out of control hair, or a cat with an attitude prob lem. Carefully read these messages from the stars for a solution to a traffic or bath room based melee.

Pisces February 19 March 20 After last weeks's interest in all things French, now may be the time to try some more homely cooking. Man cannot live by garlic snails alone, even though Saturn thinks they are absolutely delicious and the smell is mouthwatering from about 25 billion miles away.

Friday, October 4, 2013

MIND-POWERED ‘EMOTIV’ CAR SAFETY SYSTEM TESTED

‘Neuroengineering’ com pany Emotiv has created a ‘mindpowered’ headset that can detect when a driver is distracted and automatically slow down the car, in an effort to improve safety. The Australian firm has already brought its most recent mindcontrolled device to market – the Epoc headset. It’s this hightech brain activity monitor that has now been adapted to determine how hard a driver is concentrating on the road

ahead. The new project has been commissioned by the Royal Automobile Club of Western Australia as part of an exer cise aiming to improve driv er concentration. According to the Australian RAC, 20% of all drivers involved in a crash in the country say they were staring directly at the object they hit, the impact eventu ally during a lapse in con centration. The motoring body also

estimates attention loss has been a contributing factor in 46% of fatal crashes in Australia. This is where the Emotiv headset comes in. The device can monitor electrical signals from the brain using a total of 14 data recorders, including ‘sixaxis inertial sensors’ comprising a ‘threeaxis gyroscope and a threeaxis accelerometer’. It can interpret move ments of the head, eye balls, and even how often

you blink. By monitoring test sub jects’ brain waves during various scenarios, includ ing driving while on a mobile phone, texting or adjusting the radio, researchers could teach the technology what day dreaming or distracted driv ing looked like as an elec trical signal. All tests were, of course, conducted under safe, con trolled conditions. Once calibrated and linked to a car’s ECU – the electronic control unit that is the vehicle’s own brain – the system then actively slows the car down when it determines a driver is dis tracted. Once focus returns to the road, the vehicle’s speed increases again. Speaking to Wired, Emotiv Research and Emotiv Lifesciences chief executive officer, Geoffrey Mackellar, outlined the bio logical principle behind the technology: “The brain is basically an attention machine. The front part of the brain has to be active and very much involved in driving because the subconscious brain

doesn’t know that driving out of a lane is going to cause a problem.” Psychology PhD student at Murdoch University Lisa Jefferies, working in con junction with the Australian RAC, elaborates: “The fact is you cannot do more than one thing at a time usually, you are in fact switching from one to the other. Every time you

switch, there’s a cost.” When doing so behind the wheel, that cost is los ing concentration on the road, often leading to a drop in driving standards. If technology like Emotiv’s headset can improve road safety, that’s got to be a good thing – but would you be happy hand ing over control of your car to a mindreading device?

Friday, October 4, 2013

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 7 represents P and 25 represents X, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across

Down

1 Created (4) 4 Raged (5) 9 Desist (7) 10 Happen again (5) 11 Capital of Vietnam (5) 12 Hearing (7) 13 Straight sword (6) 15 Napping (6) 19 Surprise (7) 21 Little (5) 23 Snares (5) 24 Treeless grassy plain (7) 25 Herb (5) 26 Require (4)

2 Fireraising (5) 3 Inspect (7) 4 End (6) 5 Spots (5) 6 Mislead (7) 7 Congregate (6) 8 Small bird (4) 14 Yokel (7) 16 Maintain (7) 17 Steal (6) 18 Persons (6) 19 Location (4) 20 Luscious (5) 22 Concur (5)

Last weeks Solution

Across: 1 Dear, 3 Reprisal, 9 Sincere, 10 Crude, 11 Loyal, 12 Garden, 14 Secure, 16 Allege, 19 Baffle, 21 Await, 24 Alter, 25 Anemone, 26 Sorcerer, 27 Fees. Down: 1 Disclose, 2 Annoy, 4 Emerge, 5 Recur, 6 Squeeze, 7 Leek, 8 Cellar, 13 Restless, 15 Chatter, 17 Leader, 18 Debate, 20 Force, 22 Alone, 23 Pass.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double CrossWord puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 To the Spanish, to the singer (4) 3 Hesper’s fresh fields (7) 7/27 Bobby’s not in, that’s just an excuse (3,3) 8 Tree from New Zealand, some from Tonga I observed (5) 9 Dance that’s rhythmic to a graduate after a drink (5) 10 Turned out, so I be in Idaho (5) 11 Rebuild moral grinder (5) 12 Combine some summer gear (A) 13 Not in favour of harassed Tina (4) 14 Steals like the old devils (5) 16 Powerless to move, as shiner tremendously shows (5) 18 Fellow expected back during sustained enmity (4) 20 They’ve nominated a witch doctor to extract the poison (5) 22 Many sound prospects for prospectors (5) 24 I fear cook is ablaze (5) 25 Congratulate prior to key new start (5) 26 Poles damaged pitch (5)

27 See 7 28 Unfortunately harried because of a prominent fea ture (3,4) 29 A Spanish agreement with a region to the East (4) Down 1 Gnome in an unusual nick name (7) 2 Follow a rough road? (5) 3 Upset about love being indulged (6) 4 Damage found round ori ental women’s quarters (5) 5 Feeling of guilt concerning the code (7) 6 Disturb fish by double bend (5) 7 Sun god’s after the nut’s snakes (6) 15 The deacon tends to demonstrate deal (7) 16 That is about fifty, most unused (6) 17 Piece of mosaic a Greek god set up (7) 19 Journalist rebel rioted (6) 20 Although considered a snake in the grass, the important person met the queen (5) 21 Heavenly food at a state ly home we hear (5) 23 Hatches bad odors (5)

STANDARD CLUES 26 Incline (5) Across 27 See 7 1 Singing voice (4) 28 Ginger (3,4) 3 Domains (7) 29 Largest continent (4) 7/27 Evasion of responsi Down bility (3,3) 1 Added name (7) 8 Mousehole tree (5) 2 Lag behind (5) 9 AfroCuban dance (5) 3 Ruined (6) 10 Capital of Idaho (5) 4 Wives of a polygamous 11 Grinding tooth (5) man (5) 12 Blend together (A) 5 Bitter regret (7) 13 Opposed to (4) 6 Tremble (5) 14 Notches (5) 7 Hooded snakes (6) 16 Passive (5) 15 Struggle (7) 18 Bitter quarrel (4) 16 Least active (6) 20 Poisonous fluid (5) 17 Mosaic piece (7) 22 Deposits (5) 19 Newspaper boss (6) 24 State of inflammation 20 Venomous snake (5) (5) 21 Miraculous food (5) 25 Groom oneself (5) 23 Entrances (5) Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Cachet, 4 Aprons, 9 A la mode, 10 Oxeye, 11 Elfin, 12 Reeling, 13 Underhanded, 18 Titanic, 20 Taboo, 22 Prior, 23 Sloping, 24 Digger, 25 Advent. Down: 1 Chaser, 2 Chaff, 3 Enounce, 5 Phone, 6 Onetime, 7 Sleigh, 8 Bear the cost, 14 Nothing, 15 Net cord, 16 Stupid, 17 Nought, 19 Norse, 21 Baize.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

3 letter words Age Ala Ale Any Arc Ash Ate Ben Dab Ewe Gal Gov Ilk Ken Law Lip Nap

Ode Pet Res See Spa Tap Tar Tea Ten Top Yes 4 letter words Alas Asps Beta Brew Debt Else

Ewer Gibe Gran Hips Iris Leks Nose Oral Pens Pule Rate Rent Rite Sank Sear Seat Sire Star Tarn

Teal Tine Veto 5 letter words Adopt Alibi Await Berne Eagle Goose Oriel Panel Paths Pupil Sense Tiara Venue Villa

6 letter words Arrest Cheats Gaiter Slogan Stress Stubby Tattle Yellow 9 letter words Ballerina Barkeeper Entertain Inglenook

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD

Improve your Spanish clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Creamy (7) 5 Kiss (4) 8 Goodbye (5) 9 Cellophane (7) 11 Grosero (maleduca do) (4) 12 Lazy (idle) (8) 15 Huesos (5) 16 Wall (interior) (5) 19 Cakes (8) 21 Each (4) 23 Mountain (7) 25 Influenza (5) 26 Toad (4) 27 Pasas (7) Down 2 Gotas de lluvia (9)

3 Table (4) 4 Sagrado (lugar, libro) (6) 5 Abuchear (3) 6 Ciervos (machos) (5) 7 Goat (5) 10 To carry (6) 13 Operación (médico) (9) 14 Cherry (6) 17 Decade (6) 18 Vendavales (vientos fuertes) (5) 20 Now (at this time, immediately) (5) 22 Huevos (4) 24 Dos (3)

Friday, October 4, 2013 Across 1 What name completes the name of a charttopping 60s pop group: Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick and (Who)? (4) 3 By what nickname is the British Broadcasting Corporation often referred to by the British media? (4) 6 Which word, derived from the Latin for ‘silent’, means understood or implied without being stated? (5) 10 What name is often applied to medieval singers or musicians? (9) 11 William Butler were the first names of which famous Irish poet and dramatist? (5) 12 The French singer Edith Piaf was also known by the nickname the ‘Little (What)’? (7) 13 Which southern rock band formed in Tampa, Florida in late 1967 shares its name with Mike Berry’s backing group? (7) 14 Situated in Kennington in South London, what is the name of Surrey County Cricket Club’s home ground? (4) 16 Which hand tool shares its name with a front claw of a lobster or similar crustacean? (6) 18/25D Which 1959 American Western film, directed by

Howard Hawks, starred John Wayne as Sheriff John T Chance, Dean Martin as Dude and Ricky Nelson as Colorado Ryan? (3,5) 21 The last Allman Brothers Band album to include lead slideguitar player Duane Allman was entitled (What) A Peach? (3) 22 According to the lyrics of the Bob Dylan song, the (what) was Blowin’ in the Wind? (6) 23 What is the first name of the Welsh singer and presen ter who first came to fame as a treble, but is now known for his television and radio pre senting roles with the BBC and ITV, presenting shows such as Songs of Praise, Escape to the Country and Cash in the Attic? (4) 25 Which city in Los Angeles County, California, is often billed as the Media Capital of the World? (7) 27 See 26 Down 29 The Mexican drink tequila is made from which American plant with narrow spiny leaves and tall flower spikes? (5) 30 Because of its large film and television production industry, which Canadian city has earned itself the nick name Hollywood North? (9)

SUDOKU (Medium)

Quiz Word

Me and Bobby McGee, Sunday Mornin’ Comin’ Down, and Help Me Make It Through the Night? (4)

Down

31 Which earthy pigment con taining ferric oxide, varies in colour from light yellow to brown or red? (5) 32 Which colourless odour less gaseous element is often

used in signs and produces an unmistakable bright red dishorange light? (4) 33 What is the first name of the singersongwriter who is best known for hits such as

1 Which 1993 Western movie written by Kevin Jarre, starred Kurt Russell as Wyatt Earp and Val Kilmer as Doc Holliday? (9) 2 Which Latin American dance consists of three steps and a kick, by people in single file? (5) 4 Which white flower found high in the Alps gives its name to a song from the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical The Sound of Music? (9) 5 What name is given to an adult male singer with the lowest voice? (5) 6 Which 1995 computerani mated family film features the characters Woody, Buzz Lightyear and Mr Potato Head? (3,5) 7 The Westernthemed tele vision series that ran from 1967 to 1971, and starred Leif Erickson as ‘Big’ John Cannon, was entitled The High (What)? (9) 8 What name is given to the long pointed teeth used for fighting or digging seen on elephants and walruses? (5)

9 What was the stage sur name of the Beatles’ drum mer, who born Richard Starkey? (5) 15 Which 1966 Rolling Stones’ album featured the Jagger/Richards’ tracks Mother’s Little Helper, Under My Thumb and Out of Time? (9) 17 Which musical term means ‘a gradual increase in loudness’? (9) 19 Which name is given to the military position in which the rifle is held vertically on the right side with the butt on the ground? (5,4) 20 According to her 1981 UK number one hit single, what nationality was Aneka’s Boy? (8) 24 Which town in Berkshire is mentioned in the title of a tune from the Lerner and Loewe musical My Fair Lady? (5) 25 See 18 Across 26/27 Which American actor’s film roles have includ ed John J Dunbar in Dances with Wolves, Jim Garrison in JFK, Ray Kinsella in Field of Dreams, and Eliot Ness in The Untouchables? (5,7) 28 According to the title of a famous Johnny Mathis song, I’ll still be loving you, until the Twelfth of (When)? (5)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH

PONERTE EN FORMA GET FIT Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch. (Answers below)

andar

dormir bastante

beber mucha

estírate

agua

hacer ejercicio

comer bien

ir en bici

comer más pescado

no fumar

comer verduras

no tomar café

desayunar bien

ser activo

sports QUIZ

ANSEWRS: 1. Lennox Lewis 2. Aberdeen 3. 14 4. Bull Fighting 5. Three 6. Jack Dempsey 7. Washington Redskins 8. 10 9. Formula One Racing 10. Sporting Lisbon 11. Skiing 12. Fairyhouse

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Word Solution Across: 9 Ominous, 10 Abilene, 11 Nigeria, 12 Gambols, 13 Yesterday, 15 Elbow, 16 Dentist, 19 Epstein, 20 Range, 21 Raconteur, 25 Satchmo, 27 Scarlet, 29 Onerous, 30 Outline. Down: 1/24 Johnny Rotten, 2 Dirges, 3 Four, 4 Island, 5 Gargoyle, 6 Liam Neeson, 7 Redouble, 8 Gershwin, 14 Exile, 16 Derision, 17 Nineteen, 18 Tortoise, 22 Cosmos, 23 Eclair, 26 Hook, 28 Alto.

disfrutar la vida Empareja estas palabras Match the Spanish and English words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz. 1.andar, 2.beber mucha agua,

10.hacer ejercicio, 11.ir en bici,

h.don’t drink coffee,

3.comer bien,

12.no fumar, 13.no tomar café,

i.eat vegetables, j.eat more fish,

4.comer más pescado,

14.ser más activo.

k.enjoy life, l.drink more water,

5.comer verduras,

a.eat well, b.do exercise,

m.sleep well, n.stretch

6.desayunar bien,

c.eat a good breakfast,

7.disfrutar la vida,

d.go by bike, e.be more active,

8.dormir bastante, 9.estírate,

f.don’t smoke, g.walk,

Soduko

Span Eng

Quizword

Answers: 1g, 2l, 3a, 4j, 5i, 6c, 7k, 8m, 9n, 10b, 11d, 12f, 13h, 14e.

1. Which Boxer Sacked His Manager Frank Maloney In 2001? 2. Football Club did Alex Ferguson manage, before joining Manchester United? 3. How Many Nations Were Represented At The First Modern Olympics In Athens In 1896? 4. In Which Blood Sport Are Banderillas Used? 5. How Many Times Are A Team Allowed To Touch A Volleyball Before It Crosses The Net? 6. Which Boxer Of Yesteryear Was Nicknamed The Manassa Mauler? 7. Who won the 1988 Superbowl? 8. How Many Hurdles Are There In The Men's 110 metres Hurdles? 9. FISA Is The Ruling Body For Which Sport? 10. Prior To Joining Manchester Utd In 2007 Which Club Did Cristiano Ronaldo Play For? 11. Which Sport Uses The Terms Christies & Traversing? 12. Where Is The Irish Grand National Run?

Fill It In

Friday, October 4, 2013

TRELI ON THE TELLY with ALEX TRELINSKI Any mention of Atlantis and TV would normally get me remembering those old midseventies images of the webbedfooted Patrick Duffy in the Man from Atlantis, but things have changed with BBC 1’s new Saturday serial, Atlantis. The opening saw Jason, played by Jack Donnelly, in a minisub looking for his dis

JASON’S THE NEW ATLANTIS MAN

appeared father, but then there’s a flash bang wallop and he’s flung back into ancient times and the land of Atlantis. It’s entertaining comic book fare from the same team behind the suc cessful Merlin, and though some of the attempts at humour led by the otherwise likeable Mark Addy as a flab

by old Hercules were a bit forced, there was a lot to commend this new family drama if you just want to have a pleasant and unchal lenging three quarters of an hour. And there’s nothing wrong with that: not every thing has to be like Broadchurch or Peaky Blinders! Incidentally, Atlantis

got close to an extraordinary 6 million viewers (more even than Dr. Who this year), and it was not that far behind what was a brilliant new look Boot Camp on The X Factor on ITV. The BBC’s Atlantis cost less to make compared to what Channel Four shelled out to buy the heavily hyped Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. with half the viewers! It was OK with great photography and special effects akin to movie stan dards but it all seemed to be in a bit of a rush with loads of characters being thrown at us in the 44 minute debut. I’m in a minority here as it has played to rave reviews but don’t get me wrong, I’ll be in it for the long haul. I just wish that the opening episode had not been as frenetic. Brilliant premieres can be done though and in this kind of fan

tasy TV, Heroes really did a far better job of grabbing me from the first minute when it appeared 7 years ago, before going sadly down the pan in series 2, and even Atlantis got it just about right last Saturday.

James Corden’s come dy thriller The Wrong Mans is a little gem on BBC2 and the running time of just 30 minutes is my main criti cism. Corden costars with his cowriter, Matthew Baynton in a tale of two Berkshire council workers who become embroiled in a farfetched but funny tale of a major crime conspiracy. The two guys are great with some delightful sendup’s of US crime series, and I think that the show should have run to an hour, rather than six half hour episodes. That’s really saying that I didn’t want the

two instalments that I’ve seen so far to end so quickly, so I’m really being selfish!

After 7 superb years, I felt cheated by the very last episode of Dexter on FOX UK this week. I won’t spoil the ending for those of you, who like me, have been engrossed by this very origi nal story of the likeable serial killer. With some many view ers around the world invest ing time in being gripped by this drama, I certainly had the feeling of being short changed in the last few min utes. Hopefully that will not be the fate for True Blood which FOX started screening this week, with a final series to come next year. It was a belter of a start, and it takes a lot of getting used to seeing nice vampire Bill being a really nasty piece of work!

The Courier Friday TV 00:35 This Week 01:20 Holiday Weatherview 01:25 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Rip Off Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Real Rescues 12:45 Claimed and Shamed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 Country Show Cook Off 17:15 Flog It! 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 20:00 The One Show 20:30 Ronnie's Animal Crackers 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Miranda 22:00 Have I Got News for You 22:30 Citizen Khan 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Kevin Bridges The Story Continues

00:20 Science Britannica 01:20 Panorama 01:50 This Is BBC Two 05:00 The Time Traveller's Guide to Elizabethan England

06:00 Ancient Egypt: Life and Death in the Valley of the Kings 06:35 What Makes Me, Me 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Real Rescues 08:45 Claimed and Shamed 09:15 Wanted Down Under 10:00 Flog It! Trade Secrets 11:00 Question Time 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Gymnastics 16:00 Great British Menu 16:30 Animal Park 17:15 South Pacific 18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing It Takes Two 20:00 The Hairy Bikers' Bakeation 21:00 Mastermind 21:30 Gardeners' World 22:00 Natural World 23:00 QI 23:30 Newsnight

01:15 Wild Britain with Ray Mears 01:40 Jackpot247 04:00 Tonight 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Gino's Italian Escape 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Piers Morgan's Life Stories 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:35 Mickey Blue Eyes

CITIZEN KHAN New series. Return of the comedy about a self appointed community leader in Sparkhill, Birmingham. Mrs Khan lays down the law when Alia fails her exams, telling her husband to sign up their daughter at the Muslim Academy. But when he finds out how much it costs, he decides there's a better option. Adil Ray, Shobu Kapoor, Maya Sondhi and Bhavna Limbachia star.

00:05 The Fried Chicken Shop 01:10 Porn on the Brain 02:05 Random Acts 02:10 Sex: My British Job 03:25 Inside Nature's Giants 04:20 SuperScrimpers 05:15 Deal or No Deal 06:10 Countdown 06:55 River Cottage Bites 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 According to Jim 08:30 Will & Grace 08:55 Frasier 10:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:00 Four Rooms 12:00 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 River Cottage 14:05 Kirstie's Handmade Treasures 14:25 The Black Knight 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:30 Unreported World 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Marvel's Agents of SHIELD 22:00 8 Out of 10 Cats 23:00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man

October 4

00:50 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 01:15 SuperCasino 04:55 Great Scientists 05:20 Great Artists 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Police Interceptors 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Mentalist 16:15 Ice Twisters 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 World's Strongest Man 21:00 Monster Moves 22:00 NCIS 23:00 Under Siege

The Courier Saturday TV

October 5

07:00 This Is BBC Two 00:35 The Hand That Rocks the Cradle

07:50 Johnny Angel 09:05 San Demetrio London 10:40 Reel History of Britain

02:20 Weatherview

11:10 The Life of Birds

02:25 BBC News

12:00 Fred Dibnah's Industrial Age

07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30 Paul Hollywood's Bread 13:00 Football Focus

12:30 University Challenge 13:00 The A to Z of TV Cooking 13:45 Rachel Allen: Bake! 14:10 EastEnders

13:45 Sportsday 14:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather

16:00 The House That £100K Built 17:00 The Wonder of Dogs 18:00 Flog It!

14:15 Formula 1 15:30 Live Gymnastics 17:30 Final Score 18:10 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 18:30 Pointless Celebrities 19:20 Strictly Come Dancing 21:25 Atlantis 22:10 The National Lottery Live 22:25 Casualty 23:15 BBC News; Weather 23:30 Match of the Day

00:00 Weather 00:05 Later with Jools Holland 01:10 The Sheltering Sky 03:20 Question Time

19:00 Robert Peston Goes Shopping 20:00 Count Arthur Strong 20:30 Natural World 21:30 Dad's Army 22:00 The 70s 23:00 The Sarah Millican Slightly Longer Television Programme 23:40 Mock the Week

01:30 Jackpot247 04:00 The Land That Time Forgot 05:30 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Babar and the Adventures of Badou 07:10 Matt Hatter Chronicles 07:35 Dino Dan 08:00 Canimals 08:25 Sooty 08:35 Horrid Henry 08:50 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 09:15 Bottom Knocker Street 09:30 Munch Box 10:25 ITV News 10:30 Saturday Cookbook 11:25 Murder, She Wrote 12:25 ITV News and Weather 12:34 ITV Meridian Weather 12:35 Surprise Surprise 13:35 Catchphrase 14:20 Doc Martin 15:20 The X Factor 16:50 Mr Magorium's Wonder Emporium 18:35 ITV Meridian Weather 18:45 ITV News and Weather 19:00 New You've Been Framed! 19:30 Fool Britannia 20:00 The Chase 21:00 The X Factor 22:50 Through the Keyhole 23:50 ITV News and Weather

00:10 Big Fat Quiz of the 90s 01:35 Random Acts 01:40 The Future 03:15 The Ricky Gervais Show 03:45 2 Broke Girls 04:15 SuperScrimpers 05:10 Deal or No Deal 06:05 Countdown 06:45 Kirstie's Vintage Gems 07:05 The Treacle People 07:15 Rallycross 07:40 FIM Superbike World Championship 08:05 Great Scottish Swim 09:00 The Morning Line 10:00 The American Football Show 11:00 Frasier 11:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 12:00 The Big Bang Theory 12:30 The Big Bang Theory 13:00 The Simpsons 13:30 The Secret Millionaire USA 14:30 Channel 4 Racing 17:10 Come Dine with Me 17:40 Come Dine with Me 18:10 Come Dine with Me 18:40 Come Dine with Me 19:10 Come Dine with Me 19:40 Channel 4 News 20:00 Marvel's Agents of SHIELD 21:00 Grand Designs 22:00 Friends with Benefits

LETHAL WEAPON 3 Action comedy thriller starring Mel Gibson, Danny Glover and Joe Pesci. Days before he is due to retire, detective Roger Murtaugh, along with his partner Martin Riggs, is demoted after an attempt to defuse a bomb results in the destruction of an office building. But the maverick cops' return to the beat is shortlived, and they are soon back in plain clothes and in hot pursuit of a former cop now involved in gun running.

04:20 This Is BBC Two

01:05 SuperCasino 04:55 Motorsport Mundial 05:20 Great Scientists 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bubble Guppies 07:40 The Mr Men Show 07:50 Chloe's Closet 08:00 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:25 Make Way for Noddy 08:40 City of Friends 08:55 Little Princess 09:15 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:35 Angelina Ballerina 09:50 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:55 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:10 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:40 Jelly Jamm 10:55 Power Rangers: Megaforce 11:30 Slugterra 11:55 Inside Hollywood 12:00 Animal Maternity 13:00 Columbo: Short Fuse 14:30 The Magnificent Seven 17:00 Battle of the Bulge 19:45 Blood Alley 21:55 5 News Weekend 22:00 Lethal Weapon 3

The Courier Sunday TV

October 6

07:00 This Is BBC Two 08:05 Dance, Girl, Dance 00:55 The Football League Show

09:30 Gardeners' World

02:10 Weatherview

10:00 The Beechgrove Garden

02:15 BBC News

10:30 James Martin's Food Map of

07:00 Breakfast

Britain

08:40 Match of the Day

11:00 James Martin's Food Map of

10:00 The Andrew Marr Show

Britain

11:00 Sunday Morning Live

11:30 Live Athletics

12:00 Sunday Politics

14:30 Live Gymnastics

13:15 MOTD2 Extra

17:30 Flog It!

14:00 BBC News

18:00 Super League

14:15 Bargain Hunt

19:00 Great British Railway

15:00 Formula 1

Journeys

17:00 Points of View

19:30 The Great British Bake Off

17:15 Songs of Praise

20:30 The Ginge, the Geordie and

17:50 The Great British Year

the Geek

18:50 BBC News; Regional News

21:00 The Crane Gang

and Weather

22:00 The Ottomans: Europe's

19:20 Countryfile

Muslim Emperors

20:20 Strictly Come Dancing

23:00 The Wrong Mans

21:00 Antiques Roadshow

23:30 QI XL

22:00 By Any Means 23:00 BBC News; Regional News

00:04 ITV Meridian Weather 00:05 Mercury Rising 02:05 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:40 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Babar and the Adventures of Badou 07:10 Matt Hatter Chronicles 07:35 Dino Dan 08:00 Canimals 08:25 Sooty 08:35 Horrid Henry 09:00 Almost Naked Animals 09:15 Bottom Knocker Street 09:30 Fish Hooks 10:00 Big Time Rush 10:25 Ade in Britain 11:20 Columbo: Last Salute to the Commodore 13:15 ITV News and Weather 13:24 ITV Meridian Weather 13:25 Inside the National Trust 14:25 The X Factor 16:15 Fool Britannia 16:40 Big Star's Little Star 17:45 Downton Abbey 18:45 ITV Meridian Weather 18:55 ITV News and Weather 19:10 Surprise Surprise 20:10 The X Factor 22:00 Downton Abbey 23:05 ITV News and Weather 23:19 ITV Meridian Weather 23:20 The Classic BRIT Awards 2013

HOMELAND

and Weather 23:25 Match of the Day 2

00:10 Precious (Base on Nol by Saf) (Based on the Novel ""Push"" by Sapphire)" 01:55 Heartbreaker 03:35 This Is BBC Two

Return of the American thriller, starring Claire Danes, Damian Lewis and Mandy Patinkin. With Brody still at large almost three months after the terrorist attack on Langley, Saul plots a counter strike aimed at those connected to the devastating incident. However, his attempts to revive the CIA's fortunes are hampered when Carrie becomes the focus of a hostile senate investigation. Meanwhile, Dana's destructive behaviour causes problems for her family.

00:05 Easy A 01:55 The Keep 03:40 Hollyoaks 05:55 Deal or No Deal 06:50 SuperScrimpers 06:55 Countdown 07:35 The American Football Show 08:30 Hard Knocks 09:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 10:30 Sunday Brunch 13:30 The Simpsons 14:00 Channel 4 Racing 16:45 Turner & Hooch 18:40 Big Fat Gypsy Weddings 19:40 Channel 4 News 20:00 World's Weirdest Weather 21:00 Kevin McCloud's Man Made Home 22:00 Homeland 23:05 Was It Something I Said? 23:40 Gogglebox

00:25 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 01:15 SuperCasino 05:00 Michaela's Wild Challenge 05:25 Make It Big 05:50 Roary the Racing Car 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:10 Hana's Helpline 06:20 Angels of Jarm 06:25 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bubble Guppies 07:35 The Mr Men Show 07:50 Chloe's Closet 08:00 Milkshake! Monkey 08:05 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:25 Make Way for Noddy 08:40 City of Friends 08:55 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:50 Mio Mao 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:10 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:40 Jelly Jamm 11:00 The Mr Men Show 11:15 Power Rangers: Super Samurai 11:50 Slugterra 12:20 Inside Hollywood 12:25 Cowboy Builders 15:30 Innerspace 17:50 The Time Machine 19:30 Superman II 21:55 5 News Weekend 22:00 Killers

The Courier Monday TV

October 7

00:45 The Sky at Night 01:05 Weatherview 01:10 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Fake Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Real Rescues 12:45 Claimed and Shamed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Keeping Up Appearances 15:45 Keeping Up Appearances 16:15 Perfection 17:00 Escape to the Country 17:30 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 20:00 The One Show 20:30 Inside Out 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Panorama 22:00 Motorway Cops 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Have I Got a Bit More News for You

00:15 Never Mind the Buzzcocks 00:45 The Year of Living Dangerously 02:35 Countryfile 03:30 Holby City 04:30 This Is BBC Two

07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Real Rescues 08:50 Claimed and Shamed 09:20 Wanted Down Under 10:05 Watchdog 11:05 The Incredible Spice Men 11:35 Click 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 Weakest Link 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Floyd on Food 16:15 Are You Being Served? 16:45 'Allo 'Allo! 17:20 Cagney and Lacey 18:05 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing It Takes Two 20:00 The Hairy Bikers' Bakeation 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 Tom Kerridge's Proper Pub Food 22:00 The Midwives 23:00 Never Mind the Buzzcocks 23:30 Weather

00:50 Premiership Rugby Union 01:45 The Store 03:45 Motorsport UK 04:35 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Countrywise 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Doc Martin 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:35 The Agenda

00:30 Alan Carr: Chatty Man 01:30 Paddy's TV Guide 02:15 American Football Live 05:45 FIM Superbike World Championship 06:15 Countdown 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 According to Jim 08:30 Will & Grace 08:55 Frasier 10:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:00 Four Rooms 12:00 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 River Cottage 14:05 Kirstie's Vintage Gems 14:10 Only the Valiant 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 21:00 Jamie's Money Saving Meals 21:30 Gadget Man 22:00 999: What's Your Emergency? 23:00 Sex Box

999: WHATS YOUR EMERGENCY The documentary returns with a focus on the work of ambulance staff across the nation. Paramedics are called to a man in Southend, Essex, who has been stabbed multiple times, a drunken 18yearold on his first night out in central London, and a Nottingham student who has taken an overdose of antidepressants and swallowed bleach.

00:05 Date Movie 01:30 Traveller Feuds 02:15 SuperCasino 05:00 Michaela's Wild Challenge 05:25 Make It Big 05:50 Roary the Racing Car 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:10 Hana's Helpline 06:20 Angels of Jarm 06:30 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 07:55 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Nature Shock 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 Castle 16:15 Goodnight for Justice: the Measure of a Man 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Beat the Ancestors 21:00 Police Interceptors 22:00 Inside Broadmoor 23:00 Under the Dome 23:55 Reservoir Dogs

The Courier Tuesday TV

October 8

00:20 00:50 02:30 02:35 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 15:45 16:15 17:00 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

Citizen Khan Sparkle Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Fake Britain Homes Under the Hammer Real Rescues Claimed and Shamed Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Keeping Up Appearances Keeping Up Appearances Perfection Escape to the Country Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News Weather The One Show EastEnders Holby City DIY SOS BBC News Regional News and Weather The Day I Got My Sight Back

00:20 The Ottomans: Europe's Muslim Emperors 01:20 The Story of the Jews 02:20 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Science Britannica 06:00 Schools The Imagineers 06:25 Schools Curious Cat: Wool, Glass, Paper 06:55 Schools Wonders of Nature: Monarch Butterfly Spectacle

06:55 Schools Wonders of Nature: Grass Cutter Ants Teamwork 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Real Rescues 08:50 Claimed and Shamed 09:20 Wanted Down Under 10:05 Britain's Big Wildlife Revival 11:05 The Incredible Spice Men 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 Weakest Link 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Floyd on Food 16:15 Are You Being Served? 16:45 'Allo 'Allo! 17:15 Cagney and Lacey 18:00 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing It Takes Two 20:00 The Hairy Bikers' Bakeation 21:00 The Great British Bake Off 22:00 The Wrong Mans 22:30 The Sarah Millican Television Programme 23:00 Later Live with Jools Holland 23:30 Weather

00:05 Through the Keyhole 01:05 Piers Morgan's Life Stories 02:00 Jackpot247 04:00 Champions League Weekly 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 21:00 The Pride of Britain Awards 2013 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:35 Hearts in Atlantis

THE PRIDE OF BRITAIN AWARDS Carol Vorderman hosts the annual ceremony from London's Grosvenor House, where Prince Charles and Prince William join some of the biggest names in TV, showbusiness, politics and sport to cele brate the nation's heroes. Gary Barlow, Nicole Scherzinger, David Walliams, Usain Bolt and Andy Murray are among more than 100 stars paying trib ute to this year's deserving winners.

00:00 Educating Yorkshire 01:00 First Time Farmers 02:00 Random Acts 02:05 Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham.. 05:50 Nashville 06:35 SuperScrimpers 06:40 Deal or No Deal 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 According to Jim 08:25 Will & Grace 08:55 Frasier 09:55 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:00 Four Rooms 12:00 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 River Cottage 14:05 Bear Island 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 Sex Box 21:00 Double Your House for Half the Money 22:00 Masters of Sex 23:15 London Irish 23:50 8 Out of 10 Cats

01:50 Campus PD 02:15 SuperCasino 05:00 Nick's Quest 05:25 Michaela's Wild Challenge 05:50 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 07:55 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Animal Maternity 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 Law & Order: Criminal Intent 16:10 The Boy She Met Online 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Jungle Babies: Tarsier Tails 20:30 The Dog Rescuers 21:00 Cowboy Builders 22:00 CSI: NY 23:00 Castle

The Courier Wednesday TV

October 9

00:35 Frequently Asked Questions about Time Travel 01:55 Weatherview 02:00 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Fake Britain 11:00 Real Rescues 11:45 The Queen's Baton Relay Launch 13:00 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Keeping Up Appearances 15:45 Keeping Up Appearances 16:15 Perfection 17:00 Escape to the Country 17:30 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 21:00 Watchdog 22:00 The Great British Year 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Father Figure

00:20 The Crane Gang 01:20 The United States of Television: America in Primetime 02:20 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools Beneath the Lab Coat: 1 06:00 Schools You Too Can Be an Absolute Genius 06:30 Schools Curious Cat: Steel,

Electricity, Sewage 06:55 Schools Wonders of Nature: Damselfly Danger/Safety 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Real Rescues 08:45 Animal Park 09:15 Wanted Down Under 10:00 Hairy Bikers' Meals on Wheels Back on the Road 11:00 The Incredible Spice Men 11:30 See Hear 12:00 Claimed and Shamed 12:30 Daily Politics 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 Weakest Link 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Floyd on Food 16:15 Are You Being Served? 16:45 'Allo 'Allo! 17:15 Cagney and Lacey 18:00 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing It Takes Two 20:00 The Hairy Bikers' Bakeation 21:00 The House That £100K Built 22:00 This World 23:00 The Culture Show 23:30 Weather

01:25 04:00 04:45 06:05 07:00 09:30 10:25 11:30 13:30 14:30 14:55 15:00 16:00 16:59 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30 23:35

Jackpot247 Loose Women ITV Nightscreen The Jeremy Kyle Show Daybreak Lorraine The Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Dickinson's Real Deal The Alan Titchmarsh Show ITV Meridian Weather Tipping Point The Chase ITV News Meridian ITV News and Weather Emmerdale Coronation Street Big Star's Little Star Whitechapel ITV News at Ten and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Exposure

GRAND DESIGNS

00:50 01:20 01:25 02:20 03:15 03:40 04:35 05:30 06:25 07:10 07:35 08:00 08:25 08:55 09:25 10:00 10:30 11:00 12:00 Away 13:00 13:05 14:05 16:10 17:00 18:00 18:30 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:50

The Simpsons Random Acts Poker Hard Knocks KOTV Boxing Weekly Beach Volleyball Great Scottish Swim Deal or No Deal Countdown The Hoobs The Hoobs According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Four Rooms A Place in the Sun: Home or Channel 4 News Summary River Cottage Gambit Countdown Deal or No Deal Four in a Bed Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News Sex Box The Three Day Nanny Grand Designs Gogglebox My Tattoo Addiction

Kevin McCloud meets Tamayo Hussey, who has missed Japan ever since she moved to the UK 14 years ago with her husband, quantum physics professor Nigel. The couple want to transform a 1960s forester's lodge into a unique Japanese house, complete with a tatami room decorated in her homeland's traditional style sliding paper walls and a bath on the roof.

00:00 Body of Proof 01:00 Law & Order: Criminal Intent 01:50 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 02:15 SuperCasino 05:00 Nick's Quest 05:25 Michaela's Wild Challenge 05:50 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 07:55 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:20 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 The Railway: First Great Western 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:20 NCIS 16:15 Nora Roberts' Tribute 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Robson's Extreme Fishing Challenge 21:00 Animal Maternity 22:00 Fat for Cash 23:00 Wentworth Prison

The Courier Thursday TV

October 10

00:05 00:45 02:25 02:30 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:15 17:00 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

Room 101 Extra Storage Trust the Man Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Fake Britain Homes Under the Hammer Real Rescues Claimed and Shamed Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Keeping Up Appearances Perfection Escape to the Country Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News BBC London News The One Show BBC News; Regional News EastEnders Waterloo Road Truckers BBC News Regional News and Weather Question Time

00:20 The Midwives 01:20 See Hear 01:50 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Orbit: Earth's Extraordinary Journey 06:00 Schools Stargazing Challenges 06:30 Schools Little Stargazing 06:55 Schools Wonders of Nature:

Flamingo Courtship Spectacle 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Real Rescues 08:50 Claimed and Shamed 09:20 Wanted Down Under 10:05 Robert Peston Goes Shopping 11:05 Plan It, Build It 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 Weakest Link 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Floyd on Food 16:15 Are You Being Served? 16:45 'Allo 'Allo! 17:15 Cagney and Lacey 18:00 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing It Takes Two 20:00 The Hairy Bikers' Bakeation 21:00 Trust Me I'm a Doctor 22:00 Peaky Blinders 23:00 Mock the Week 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 James Nesbitt's Ireland 01:05 Jackpot247 04:00 Bend of the River 05:30 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Pat and Cabbage 22:00 Breathless 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:40 Gone

TRUCKERS New series. Drama about a haulage company in Nottingham, with each episode focusing on a dif ferent member of the team as he or she under goes a lifechanging journey. Malachi (Stephen Tompkinson) is struggling to accept his marriage is over after all, he and his exwife still live together, even though she has a new fiance. But when he interrupts them having culinarythemed phone sex, it becomes clear he has to move on, so son and fellow trucker Glen sets about helping

00:50 British 01:45 01:50 02:45 05:30 07:10 07:35 08:00 08:25 08:55 09:25 09:55 10:30 11:00 12:00 Away 13:00 13:05 14:05 14:15 16:10 17:00 18:00 18:30 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 22:00 23:00

More Sex Please, We're Random Acts Shameless USA Aradhana The Shanghai Gesture The Hoobs The Hoobs According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Four Rooms A Place in the Sun: Home or Channel 4 News Summary River Cottage Kirstie's Vintage Gems The Anderson Tapes Countdown Deal or No Deal Four in a Bed Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News Sex Box Location, Location, Location Educating Yorkshire My Tattoo Addiction

00:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 01:00 Poker 01:55 SuperCasino 05:00 Nick's Quest 05:25 Michaela's Wild Challenge 05:50 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 07:55 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Police Interceptors 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:20 NCIS 16:15 Living with the Enemy 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Big, Bigger, Biggest 21:00 The Railway: First Great Western 22:00 Countdown to Murder 23:00 Law & Order: Criminal Intent 23:55 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

Friday, October 4, 2013

ACCOUNTANTS Pro Business Support – for all your accountan cy needs in English; bookkeeping, taxes, wage slips and more. We cater for companies and selfemployed peo ple; we can deal with everything for you. Call us on 966 923 963 for first consultation free of charge.

ANIMALS Pet Travel UK family pet transporters Spain/UK. Travel with your pet for free. All air conditioned vehicles (no vans) www.pettraveluk.co.uk UK 0800 612 4922 or Spain 678 756 644 (131)

BOATS FOR SALE GC15: 16m Guy Couach motor cruiser, 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, kitchen, lounge/dining area, and flybridge. 2 x Mercedes 350kw diesel motors. 56000€. Call 966 923 963 or 651 885 200 A57: Rare Vintage 1957 Astondoa Classic Wooden motor launch, 10 m with Perkins diesel engine. All in working order. Needs TLC and revarnish, great proj ect, 6000€. Call 966 923 963 or 651 885 200 .

AIR CONDITIONING

CHURCH SERVICES International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja. Evangelical non denominational church. Sunday services 11am. Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm. Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nationali ties welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276. Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3. Pilar de la Horadada. Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Bible study and Prayer. Home groups meet dur ing the week. All wel come from any church background or none. For further information contact PilarChristian. CommunityChurch@g mail.com or contact Reverend Eddie on 966769300 or 650509606. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) meet at 10.00 each Sunday at their Torrevieja meet inghouse in the Torreaguas building on the corner of Rambla Juan Mateo Garcia 104, close to the windmill in Torrevieja, 667 533 597.

BLINDS

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES Busy bar/restaurant in San Javier, close to air port, selling up due to health problems. Loyal clientele, ideal location. Phone 634362820 for further information. FOR SALE. S u p e r m a r k e t ‘Traspasa’. Fully stocked plus machines / shelving. Been running with present owner 7 years. Good income. In high street Guardamar. Near Weds market. 20.000€ ONO. Tel: 634 106 460

CARS FOR SALE

Car insurance quotes – new extra discount on fully comprehensive policies at the price of third party! Excellent prices for expats, all policies and call centre staff in English. We will call you back with a quote. 966 923 963

PROPERTY FOR RENT Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.villaandvacation.c om or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 2 or 3 bed / 2 bath apartments in San Miguel. Lift, communal rooftop pool & solarium, video entry system. Available for short or long term rent from 350 pcm. Tel 966723437 or 616 493 487. (136) Ref: 61, A lovely two bedroomed ground floor apartment, located in the centre of the small Spanish town of Los Montesinos, With a pleasant communal swimming pool adjacent & all amenities in walk ing distance. Long and short term rental avail able. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 33, Ground floor spacious 2 bedroom apartment, located in Torre la Mata. Close to

CARPENTER

INSURANCE CASER SEGUROS for all your insurance needs, home, car, health, funeral. Policies available in English and German. Call

ALARMS

CATERING

Professional Business Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from our friendly staff.

CAR HIRE

all amenities and beach. 3 month rental €300pcm Call: 965 707 188 Ref: 104, 2 Bedroom apartment in Torrevieja, (near gypsy lane), small balcony, near all ameni ties and Friday market. €350pcm Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bedroom detached villa with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near Guardamar. Convenient for all amenities, shops, supermarket, restau rants and bars. Short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 702: Beautiful 2 bedroom apartment, located near los Locos beach, beautifully fur nished. Short term rentals from 175€ per week. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situ ated in Monino Blanco. The property overlooks a superb communal pool area, in within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

LONG TERM RENTALS WANTED! Properties, all types, in the Torrevieja area wanted for long term rentals. Call us on 96 692 3963 CBR32 : 3 bed, 2 bath apartment in Los Montesinos, very spa cious 120 m2, fully fur nished, with pool on solarium, only 300€ p/m, available end of September, call now on 966 923 963 CBR18 : Large, detached villa on 1200 m plot, beachside

Punta Prima, 3 bed room, 2 bathroom, pri vate pool and garage, 900€ pcm, call 966 923 963 Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bed room apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a ter race outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

PROPERTY FOR SALE Home and Contents cover Comprehensive policies for house and contents with CASER Seguros excellent prices for expats; poli cies available in. Call 966 923 963 for a quote. RS116 – 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom towncentre apartment in Los Montesinos, beautifully furnished/decorated, pool on solarium, 85.000€, call 966 923 963 Butia Espana Are you trapped. Need to sell quick. We are the only answer for a speedy sale.UK buyers waiting. www.butiaespana.com Telephone 0800 612 7514 or Spain 678 756 644 (131) Rare opportunity to pur chase on Mediterrania III, Gran Alacant. 2 bed rooms, 2 bathrooms, Private Parking, F/Furnished, Large communal pools & Tennis courts S/W fac ing, Dramatically reduced for quick sale to 126.000 euros. Ref No. K58 Call 627 711 155 for immediate view ing RS96 : La Mata, 1 bed room apartment, large solarium, communal pool, close to beach, 55.000€, call 966 923 963

CLEANERS

Friday, October 4, 2013 RS80 : Spanish style townhouse in Algorfa, totally reformed and redecorated, 110m2, 3 lrg.bedrooms, 1 bath room, many extras, absolute bargain at 99,500 €, call now on 966 923 963 for no obli gation viewing. Ref: 510, €70,000. Bungalow located in San Luis. It is close to the supermarkets, bars and restaurants and is on the local bus route. An Opel Corsa car is included in this sale. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Lovely Corner property in Novamar V, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms Being sold fully furnished including appliances, Has secure

underground parking and faces large oasis communal pool. Walking distance to beach. 139.000 Euros, Call 627 711 155 and quote Ref No. K10 Ref: 104 Lovely 2 Bedroom Apartment, close to Shops, walking distance to Friday Market and Town Centre and the beach. The property is close to the Habaneres Shopping Centre and Aquapark. Recently refurbished apartment in a good central loca tion. Conveniently situ ated for all the facilities of this modern vibrant town, and only a few blocks away from Torreviejas excellent sea front with its abun

CAR BREAKERS

dant cafes, restaurants and shops. Price €43950 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. BRJ1 – 1 bedroom top floor renovated apartment in San Luis. Great sea and lake views. 45.000€. Tel. 966 923 963 Immaculate ground floor Duplex, 2 beds, 2 bath, Private Parking, Situated in Novamar, Gran Alacant. Price includes very tasteful furniture and white goods. Walking dis tance to all local ameni ties and beach. Now only 129,750 euros. Ref No K24. 627 711 155 Ref: 521, €105,000. This comfortable bun galow is located in San Luis with a new roof and solarium tiles. It is close to supermarkets, bars,

restaurants and is on the local bus route. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Don Pueblo, Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Large Kitchen with Galleria, Secure underground parking, Gas Central Heating, Glazed in Porch, Solarium with stunning views. Viewings absolutely essential. Very large property at reduced price of 190.000 euros. Ref No. K38 Call 627 711 155 KBJ3 : 3 bed penthouse in Guardamar, fur nished, fantastic sea views, communal pool and parking, 155.000€, call 966 923 963 RS1 : 3 bed large villa in Torrevieja on 950m2 plot, private pool,

HOUSE / BAR CLEARANCE

Jacuzzi/sauna, parking, 289.000€, call 966 923 963 Opportunity to purchase at the off plan price of 195.000 euros. Large 4 Bed, 3 Bath Brand new property. Secure under ground parking for 2 cars and communal pool. Situated opposite Gran Alacant and over looks projected golf course. Ref No. K52. 627 711 155 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.c om Ref: 78, €120,000. Three bedroom Quad in Jardin Del Mar VII. There is offroad park

ing and small storage shed in the enclosed garden area, communal pool nearby. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 2 Bed, 1 Bath Ground floor duplex. Central heating, Grills, Fully fur nished, Glazed in Galleria, 2 communal pools, private parking and walking distance to the Gran Alacant com mercial centre. Situated in the popular urbanisa tion of Puerto Marino. Now only 96,500 euros for quick sale Ref No. K46. 627 711 155 Ground Floor Duplex, on the Monte y Mar estate of Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 1 Bathroom, Fully fur nished, Private Parking, Communal pool Ref. GA0094 NOw only 83.000e Tel. 680333242

HOME CARE

Friday, October 4, 2013

Gran Alacant Detached villa, located in a very sought after location.Situated on a 560m2 S/W facing plot and constructed in 2005. Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms (2 full baths), Lounge Diner, fully equipped Kitchen, Porch and Solarium with Alicante & Sea Views. ref.L81. €258,000 neg. Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant Town House with a difference. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Quiet Location, Extra storage areas, and South Facing Private Pool as well as 2 communal pools. Fully Furnished, All mod cons. Greenland Views and all local amenities close by. Ref. No L79. 179.000 euros 680 333 242 Ref: 520, €80,000. Two bedroom apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazedin ter race and a large solari um. This property comes with a large com munal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant immacu late villa, 3 bedroomed, 3 bathroomed property maintained to a very high standard inside and out and the interior furnishings are top qual ity, offering a feeling of luxury and good taste. The plot size is 400m2 and has been beautiful ly tiles, and graveled and has established palms and plants. Oil fired central heating

throughout, log effect fire place, ceiling fans in all rooms, towel heater rails, glazed in shower units, instant hot water, water purifier, free English TV, phone & internet lines, fitted dou ble hanging wardrobes, safe, glazed in front porch, vanity units and much more. The pool is an 8 X 4 m2 salt water pool, meaning mainte nance is much easier plus outside toilet and shower. Sea views to front with Greenland views to the rear. ref K51. €245,000 Tel 680333242 Ref 533: Lovely 2 bed room duplex located in the popular area of Punta Prima, the prop erty has a large lounge and fully equipped kitchen, 2 double bed rooms, one with bal cony, bathroom with double shower. €126,000 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 516, €39,999. Studio apartment in San Luis, close to amenities. Open plan fully equipped kitchen. Good sized lounge, bedroom and out onto balcony which has been glazed to create another room. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 513, €115,000. Two bedroom ground floor apartment, in Aguas Nuevas, close to all amenities including the beach. It has a good size lounge, kitchen and has off road parking facilities. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, €60,000 A lovely 1 bedroom apart

ment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental avail able. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: KP3100, €183,000. Three bedroom, two bathroom detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool. Garage to side of house. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bedroom apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazedin ter race and a large solari um. This property comes with a large com munal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Lovely clean detached Villa just as you enter Gran Alacant. Very cen tral location, 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Garden Shed, Private Parking, Attractive Gardens, Private pool Ref: K59 240.000e Tel. 627711155 Recently reduced 4 Bed, 3 Bath Villa, in Gran Alacant. Quiet Location, Exceptional Views. Converted Under build, 2 Lounges, 2 Kitchens, Private Garage and being sold

Fully Furnished, now only 239.950 Ref: L81 Tel. 680333242 Large 4 Bedroom, 4 Bathroom, 2 Kitchens, 2 Lounges, 600m2+ plot Large Retractable Glazed in Pool for all year swimming, Private Parking for 4 cars, Very lowmaintenance, Fully Furnished. 330.000e but Negotiable. Very dif ferent to the other prop erties in Gran Alacant and is disabled friendly Ref: L80 Tel. 680333242 Corner Plot Property in the lower end of Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Under build, Roof top Solarium Being sold Fully Furnished including White goods. Walking distance to all local amenities. 139.950e Ref. GA0087 Tel. 680333242 Limited Edition Fortaleze in Gran Alacant Exceptionally Large Plot. 4 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Large Private Pool with Decorative Garden, Private Parking, Electric Gates, Glazed in Porch, Solarium, Under build. Quiet sought after area. Very tastefully furnished and all included 370.000e Ref. K52 Tel. 627711155 Mid Terraced Townhouse on Avda Polognia, Gran Alacant

Furnished to a very high standard and includes White Goods. 3 Bed, 2 Bath, Lounge Diner, Fully converted Under build offering a second lounge and large stor age area. Roof top Solarium, Glazed in gal leria with extended worktops. Front Garden with BBQ, Communal Pool with Gardens. 132.000e Ref. K16 Tel. 627711155 SemiDetached Villa with Open Greenland Views to the Rear and Alicante Views to the Front, means this prop erty in Gran Alacant would appeal to any body looking for a quiet location. Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Lounge diner, with working Fire place, Porch, Solarium, Established Gardens and Private Pool, Private Parking on a large plot. 265.000e Ref. L95 Tel. 680333242 Offers Invited on a mid Terraced Town house in Gran Alacant. Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 2

Bathrooms, Lounge Diner, Galleria, Solarium, Under build. Communal Pool and Gardens, and with Exceptional Views of Alicante. Being Sold Fully Furnished includ ing White Goods. Ref. K42 Tel. 627711155 (reasonable offers only) 2 Bedroom, 2 Bathroom, Unfurnished Mid Terraced Townhouse in GA. Recently decorated throughout means this property is a very clean black canvass. Has Air Con & Security Grills and the use of a Communal Pool. Price recently reduced to 110.000e Ref.K12 Tel. 627711155 Reduced for a quick sale to 95.000 e 2 Bedroom, 1 bathroom,

POOLS

PETS

PERSONAL

MAN AND A VAN

PLUMBERS

DRAINAGE

POOL TABLES

Friday, October 4, 2013 Top Floor Duplex in Gran Alacant. Very Modern Property with Many extras. Glazed in Porch, Roof Top Solarium, Wooden Flooring. Immaculate condition and ready to move in. Ref. K15 Tel. 627711155. Gran Alacant, Situated on the very first urbani sation as you enter Gran Alacant, this 2nd floor duplex offers taste and quality. Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 1 bath room, loungediner, independent kitchen, full rooftop solarium with superb views and recently glazed in porch offering extra living area as well as extra privacy as the glass is mirrored. Ref.K44 €108,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated in the "Alto" part of Gran Alacant, this 3 bed roomed, 4th floor apart ment, offers luxury accommodation, with absolutely stunning sea views, as well as views of Alicante bay and the famous Santa Barbara Castle.The apartment is 89 square meters with open plan kitchen / liv

ing room and includes all electrical appliances & furniture also there is a utility room, open ter race, and private park ing. The urbanisation also offers many com munal pools, tennis courts, restaurants and bars. Ref. K20 €109,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant villa locat ed in a very quiet area , situated at the end of a culdesac means there is no through traffic.3 bed, 3 bath, 330m2 plot, established large gar dens, working fireplace, solar panel for hot water,private parking, south facing great views, fully furnished, fantastic opportunity. ref. L85. €215,000 Tel 680333242 Beach front Line proper ty, over looks Carabassi Beach, Gran Alacant. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Secure Underground Parking, Fully furnished, Roof Top Solarium. 3 Large Communal Pools, Fantastic communal Gardens, Tennis Courts and much more. 125.000 Euros Ref No.

SURVEYOR

STORAGE

REMOVALS

K23. Tel. 627 711 155 Gran Alacant, Situated front line to the famous blue flag beaches of Carabassi, the real beauty of this property is its proximity to the beach, but also on offer is a fantastic communal pool situated in beauti fully kept gardens with little Spanish walk ways.Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 2 bath rooms, lounge diner, American style kitchen including all appliances, roof top solarium with stunning views, front porch area with front garden and a secure underground garage. fully furnished Ref. K23 €125,000 rare opportu nity Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant limited edition villa, not very often available on the market. Only a few of this type were ever con structed Very large 5 bedrooms, 4 bath room(2 ensuit) proper ty, situated on a large corner plot with a 10 x 5 private pool and private parking. Loungediner with working fireplace, fully equipped kitchen with utility room. Large landing area, leading onto solarium, with extra storage external room. Front porch area leading into large well established gardens with irrigation system and fruit trees. Being sold fully furnished.

Within walking distance to Gran Alacant com mercial centre and 5 minute drive to Carabassi beaches. ref. K11. €270,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant large detached villa with 3 double bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge diner, fully equipped kitchen, large porch, roof top solarium, 400 m2 Plot, with estab lished low maintenance very private gardens with irrigation system, electronic gates, private parking, outside wc, sink & shower, terraces, air con ( h & c ), mosqui to nets, grills, alarmed, large spa pool with sep arate Jacuzzi section. Within easy walking dis tance to Gran Alacant commercial centre and close to local bus and tram route. Ref K33. €260,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, detached villa in desirable road close to all amenities, comprising of 3 double bedrooms, 3 baths, lounge diner with work ing fire place, brand new kitchen with all appliances and black granite work tops, pri vate pool, plot of 550m2, established irri gated gardens and fruit trees, private parking, solarium, also there is a converted under build giving more bedrooms

RAG AND BONE

,bathroom & kitchen, this house has many extras and is being sold fully furnished. Ref.k47. €280,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant southfac ing, very private villa, with woodland and Alicante views. Situated at the end of a small cul desac which means this villa enjoys a very peaceful location.3 Bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 3 Bathrooms, lounge diner with working fire place, fully fitted kitchen with including white goods, large front porch, solarium,work shop and storage in under build, central heating, air con H/C, ceiling fans, grills, UK T.V, off road parking and plenty of outside park ing also. Due to its ori entation of this property enjoys full sun, all day, something very impor tant in the winter months. Ref.K24. €237,000 Tel 680333242

QUIZZES Experienced quizmas ter/question setter with personality available to host quiz nights in local bars. Tel: 664 838 581

REMOVALS Move It Now Small removals and deliver ies. Spain/UK Budget prices. Last minute jobs u n d e r t a k e n . www.moveitnow.co.uk Telephone UK 0800 612 4922 or Spain 678 756 644 (131) SITUATIONS VACANT RADIO COSTA INTER NATIONAL needs moti vated sellers. Spanish, English and German language is a bonus but

VAN HIRE

not essential. Training and good earnings guaranteed. For more info call 644 126 600 or email info@radico costainternational.com Medaesthetics require a Beautician. Must have NVQ Level 3 and work ing self employed email cv to sabinebrooks@hot mail.com

SOLICITORS Need English speak ing solicitors in Torrevieja? Let us help to solve your problems with debt recovery, divorce, property, fraud, criminal defence. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your spe cialist solicitor today

WIG SPECIALIST SALON MAR GARETHAS, 23 years in Torrevieja Hair/Wig specialist for Medical ill ness and Hair Loss problems. We offer dif ferent Hair Replacements, top fillers, Hair prostheses, Toupees and Wigs, Natural and Artificial hair and much more. Also fashion/festival accessories TV/TS are welcome to our service. Please call our salon reception for an appointment with Margaretha on Tel no 966 921 846 Torrevieja (90)

WANTED

Friday, October 4, 2013

Greenside Gossip IVIE DAVIES takes a weekly look at the golf scene - golfdavies@gmail.com

A LIFE OF RORY The last time he was in Chicago, Rory McIlroy famously got some speedy assistance from a police offi cer to make his Ryder Cup tee time at Medinah last year, but I suspect he wanted to race out of town the other week end! He’s expected to take a month off now that his 2013 PGA Tour season is over before returning to the fair ways for some European Tour events later in the year. A year ago, he won the BMW Championship in Indianapolis, captured two of the four FedEx Cup playoff events and finished second in the points standings to Brandt Snedeker. Even to McIlroy, his struggles remain a mystery, but do they? Everything came easy last year, and now he says he is working harder, hit ting more balls and spending more time on the range. He certainly didn't expect to be in this position, and who honest ly could have predicted such a situation, especially when the New Year dawned with so much hype involving new clubs and a fanfare for the then No. 1 ranked golfer in the world? Who did? Well quite a few did, when he said he was drop ping Titleist, which I wrote about earlier this year. McIlory’s fall from glory remains among the big golf stories of the year. 12 months ago, McIlroy captured the BMW for his third victory in three starts, including the PGA Championship. He would go on to win the seasonending European Tour event in Dubai, capturing the money title on two tours. He showed up in Abu Dhabi in January for a grand announcement including a fireworks display trumpeting his signing of a lucrative endorsement deal with Nike but nothing has been the same since, leading to all kinds of conjecture. Changes of 14 clubs in his bag, a highprofile girlfriend in tennis star Caroline Wozniacki, a switch in his management company, the bad PR that came from walking off the course at the Honda Classic: it's been a tough old year, with rare instances of good play. His new management company, Rory McIlroy Incorporated (RMI), will be headed by Donal Casey, an “actuary“(A person who analyses statistics and uses them to calculate insurance losses) who was already an adviser to the golfer. Yes! That sounds a really good move? The dis pute between him and Horizon sports follows a frustrating season when he has struggled after switching to clubs sup plied by Nike in one of the biggest sponsorship deals in sport. In 19 worldwide tournaments, McIlroy has missed four cuts, withdrawn from another tournament and finished worse than 40th on five occasions. His best finish was second at the Texas Open the week before the Masters, his only top5 this season. Perhaps most disappointing was that McIlroy was a nonfactor at three of the major championships and only briefly made a move at the PGA Championship, where he tied for eighth.

TITTER ON THE TEE A Doctor was talking to his golfing mates at the Club "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here years ago. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realises the longterm harm caused by the germs in our drinking water” He continued,” But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have, or will, eat it, and can anyone here tell me what food it is, that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?" After several seconds of silence, a 75yearold member of the group, raised his hand, and softly said, "Wedding Cake."

For example the following could be done: 1. Realistic Society, resi dent golfer green fee (no Low Medium and High rates) 2. Use a special welcome board, and a branded menu for societies or groups 3. Have the Marshall wel come and brief the players on the course before they get to the first tee. 4. Offer groups a “welcome pack” which includes a course plan, tee, ball marker, pitch mark repairer.

The issues have been numerous throughout the year, with one big problem being the inability to put all facets of his game together at once. There’s also been an increased ten dency for doublebogeys and some lacklustre play around the greens where Rory’s even missing them with wedges. He had eight doubles in the FedEx Cup, and then added four more doubles plus a triple at the BMW. During the opening round, he had one hole where it took him 5 strokes to get in from just off the green. If nothing else, McIlroy will have a bit of time to think about things.

GOLF MARKETING

Satisfying the needs of the golfer has, in my opinion, never been more important, and attracting repeat green fees is a vital way to ensure income. Golf courses here seem to think they are predominately dependant on the “visiting golfer”. However, the resident golfer and the golf societies are and should be considered as “repeat green fees” as their loyalty is without question. There are those golf courses that go out of their way to encourage vis itors and societies whilst others are not particularly interested. Even the seasonal green fee structure leaves at lot to be desired! For those wish ing to attract visitors, it is quite sur prising to find a large proportion of this category engaged in finding first time visitors, instead of considering the merits of encouraging repeat green fees. If you asked golf clubs to make any comment on this, they would likely to say “If they enjoyed playing the course they’ll be back” But, wait a minute. If there are other clubs in the vicinity that are of a similar standard, how can they secure repeat business? In my opinion, golf clubs can and should do more to encourage repeat business. Apart from the weather, they can make a visiting group or visitor feel more welcome.

KNOW YOUR RULES QUESTION In stroke play, Tony places his palm on the putting surface to see if the grass is wet, but does not roughen or scrape the surface. What is the penalty? A: There is no penalty. B: Tony incurs a one shot penalty for testing the putting green. C: Tony incurs a two shot penalty for testing the putting green. ANSWER A: There is no penalty (Rule 161d and Decision 161d/4)

Once the golfer gets out on the course, it’s the playability of the course which is noted – the speed of play, ease with which the layout can be fol lowed, as well as how long and tough the rough is or whether the bunkers have rakes and if they are used. Different categories of golfers will be influenced by different things. For example, high handicap golfers will prefer plenty of room to spray the ball about without the penalty of landing in waist high rough, losing a ball, or having great difficulty in getting it out. A wellpresented golf course makes a big impression on the visiting golfers who enjoy trim and shaped fairways, low penalty rough, good and true greens and clear guidance on hazards. When the golf is finished, the group of golfers will go to the clubhouse, with the facil ities and staff offering service always recognised by the visiting golfer. A great day’s golf can be ruined by high prices, poor facilities and/or inatten tive staff. In this day and age, visiting golfers make a judgement on the whole day’s experience rather than just the stan dard of golf. As a general rule, selling and promoting to the firsttime cus tomer can cost five times as much as dealing with existing customers. Of course, there have to be firsttimers, but it is far more beneficial to keep 60% repeat rate. It is a less costly business and it is easier to convince someone who has already experienced a good time. If you think this would be better directed at golf courses, you’re absolutely correct. Let’s hope they are encouraged to read this and then maybe we will all be the better off for it!

Friday, October 4, 2013

YANKED OFF

What is it with the Yanks? Over the pond they’ve got their own peculiar brand of football (never understood it), so why the Uncle Sam Kydd can’t they leave our beautiful game alone? Have you tried tuning in to channels like Fox for footiefollowing, forever telling us about ‘saccar’ like they invented it? I like the American TV ads; they’re a welcome change, but the presenters, well… These days even if your name’s Clough, it’s not enough to save you from the sack. Poor ol’ Nigel bit the dust last week after holding the dan gerous honour of being the Championship’s longest serving man ager, not far behind the Prem’s Arsenal’s Arsene. Derby’s boss since 2009, nice Nige hadn’t failed, his crime was that dormant

Derby dwindled to 14th place, and with three defeats in eight days the American manage ment group GSE kneejerked Nigel into Neverland. It’s a particularly cruel one because after Hartlepool it was Derby County who gave father Brian Clough the opportunity to launch himself into the greats of British football management with Peter Taylor, by taking the modest Midlanders from about where they are now to the top of what is now the Premier League, and into Europe before abruptly walking out on prin ciple. Later Clough senior took near neigh bours, my Nottingham Forest (be still my beating heart) into immortality where he had left off with Derby. But forty years on, son Nigel has not been able to repeat the phenomenal feats of his father, seemingly unable to wield the same ruthless style and ability nec essary today and he’s paid the price. Good luck Nigel now stay out of that nasty football management, open a shop and walk the dog… And now, strewth, Gone Stupid Evidently have appointed Steve McClaren, that well k n o w n England, Forest and

Elche’s duck broken

Elche clinched their first Primera Division victory in almost a quarter of a century after beating Celta Vigo 10 on Sunday, courtesy of a secondhalf Javi Marquez goal. Elche put their agonising midweek defeat to Real Madrid behind them to record a topflight victory for the first time since they last appeared in La Liga back in the 198889 sea son. Marquez was the matchwinner with his pre cise 62ndminute finish helping Elche double their points tally for the cam paign and inflict a third defeat in four games on Celta. Elche almost took a secondminute lead through Manu Del Moral only for Celta goal keeper Yoel Rodriguez to tip the shot wide. Yoel was also called on to save from Marquez and Gil later in the half before the

latter struck the post just before halftime as Elche pushed for the opener. Celta also posed an attacking threat in the opening period and Elche stopper Manu Herrera needed to be alert to save from Charles, Alex Lopez and Augusto Fernandez. The chances dried up at the start of the sec ond half but the first opportunity after the break saw Elche net what would prove to be the winning goal, Marquez racing into the area before drilling a low shot across Yoel and in off the base of the far post. Celta could find no way back after that as Elche's defence held firm to seal their longawaited win, which lifted them out of the bottom three. Elche entertain Espanyol this Saturday afternoon with a 4.00pm kickoff.

Uncle Sam’s mates lack nouse

further failure. Words fail me... Hartlepool? In that neck of the woods Potty Paulo’s predictably perished, proving that if you live by the spoken sword, you per ish by a painfullypublic death. PdC’s flashy flickering has been switched off at the Stadium of Light… Pitifullyfew pressure packed performances have contrasted with idiotic incidents (ketchup wars) peculiar pur chases (2 Brits in 14 buys), these combined with some dodgy discards (Sessegnon to West Brom, Mignolet to Liverpool). PP’s political persuasions (Mussolini mimicker) and manmanagement messes (O’Shea oratory offences) didn’t help but the real bottom line was – bottom place in the Prem. It’s not so much the ‘X’ Factor, more the ‘Y’ Factor because just like Derby, the Yankee hire/fire influence is plain here too. Wealthy American financier and Sunderland owner Ellis Short is short on a lot of things:

knowledge of English football, judge of char acter and above all common sense. To take a relativelyuntried maverick like Di Canio and give him unhindered hire/fire power and lots of money to manage a famous football club like Sunderland was like giving an arsonist with previous a box of matches and a factory full of fireworks. It was a reckless gamble which has predictably blown up in Short’s face, and left more problems than the club started with: sheer folly from the word go. Once again, true Brit Kevin Ball has had to pick up the pieces and this time deserves his chance; he’s waited and watched hownottodoit for long enough… so gizzim the job, Ellis! At Man U, the Glazers now keep a low profile, and likewise Liverpool learned the message. In all I can sum up the Yank influence with one of those stickers you see on the rear of cars Back Off Buddy!

A missed first half penalty and one con ceded in the second period saw FC Torrevieja come away with only a point from Orihuela, after throwing away a 2nil lead. The exciting draw was the first match against local rivals Orihuela in 18 years with over 800 fans enjoying the Sunday after noon fare at the Los Arcos stadium. Torrevieja made the early running but were unable to convert a 15th minute penal ty which was meekly struck towards a corner by Dani Meseguer, who took the kick instead of Dani Lucas who was successful against Utiel the previous weekend. Fortunately for Torrevieja, Gasch opened the scoring just 4 minutes later, and then when Obele with a low strike made it 2nil just after half time , the visitors were in the driving seat for just 3 minutes, when Kike Mateo pulled one back for Orihuela. With a quarter of an hour remaining, Dani Meseguer’s dodgy afternoon was complete

as he felled an Orihuela striker in the penalty area, and was sent off, with Orihuela’s Cañadas showing him how to take a spot kick. The home side could even have taken all the spoils, had it not been for an impres sive display from the Torrevieja keeper, Carrion. It’s back to the Vicente Garcia Stadium this Sunday for a 6.00pm kick off as Torrevieja take on Paterna.

OH DANI BOY!

Monte’s goal drought continues Goals continue to be at a premi um for CD Montesinos as they could only get a point in their goal less home draw with Bigastro. Montesinos had most of the first half pressure, with Bigastro defend ing resolutely, and Fernando com ing closest to scoring when he hit the post with a cross come shot. The second half pretty much mir

rored the first with most of the scoring chances coming from the home side, but a lack of clinical fin ishing cost them dearly. It could have been worse as Monte keep er, Roberto, produced a brilliant save to prevent Bigastro scoring on a breakaway. Monte’s next match is away to new club Playas de Orihuela this Sunday.

Racing … because golf, football and rugby only require one ball!

Looking to prove just that, Velocity Racing will be playing host to a stock car racing tournament to end all tournaments this coming Saturday. Taking place at Spain’s premier race track, the Cartagena Oval, the fun will begin at 6.30pm and continue for a full action packed three hours. Dubbed ‘The Run to the Real Sun’, as this article went to print, drivers from across the UK and Germany were making their way to Spain to join the men and women of Velocity Racing. Drivers, such as Mark Pope, an experienced banger racer and former Cornish Champion and Mark Sear, a driver experienced in racing bangers, national hotrods and stock rods. Their goal – to determine who has what it takes to be become the Velocity Racing European Champion. With their pride at stake, the thrills and spills on the race track are expected to surpass even those of previous race events,

providing a real family spectacle not to be missed. The gate price is just €5 euros per adult and €12 for a family ticket (2 adults + unlimited chil dren) And it doesn’t stop there – Velocity Racing has organised an evening of food and entertainment for Sunday to be held at The New Tavern in San Miguel de Salinas. For just €10 per head, guests can enjoy a delicious carvery followed by entertainment from Elvis trib ute act Nigel Burchill. The fun will start at 7pm and all are welcome to come along. For directions to the Cartagena Oval, please visit www.velocityracing.eu For any further information please ring 674 256 147 or email info@velocityracing.eu

Friday, October 4, 2013

SAINTS AND SINNERS!

Did you catch the Capital Crunch, Spurs and Chelsea on Bash of the Day? Everyone saw on TV what Fernando did when he heard the drums… is it the year of the cat with Torres facially clawing that big bruising Belgian Jan Vertongen? Miserable Mou merely poured his man a saucer of milk as Torres rightly retired, redcard ed and redfaced. Later MM pre dictably verbally attacked Vertongen, defending the Spaniard. No way, Jose, yer’ man was wrong and got off very lightly FAwise – look what they (rightly) did to Suarez. Arms raised is wrong, and scratching faces a big ban. Blues won in Europe, now Norwich, Sunday sb OK… Some sarfcoast side called Southampton ’ve shoved ‘emselves into sixth place in the Premier League. Oh yeah, they’re the Saints, supposed to subside sadly back to second division status when that nice Nigel Atkins got the boot last year (NB it’s been another nasty week for Nigels, what with poor old Cloughie Junior’s demise at Derby). At St Mary’s it was ‘Pochettywho?’ when the Italian influence at St Mary’s decided their Nigel had taken the Saints as far as he

John McGregor reports

could and callously called it a day, colossally cruel considering Atkins’ exacting efforts in getting the southerners into the prestigious Prem. Soon though ‘no hablo Ingles bien’, new Saints hefe Argentinian Mauriccio Pochettino got his message across and has turned Saints into a power to be reck oned with. Mysterious names like Lallana, Schneiderlin and Rodriguez are in the headlines, and all are led by England’s new/old Lionheart Ricky Lambert, not just an oldfashioned striker who’s now notched 200 league goals, oh no sir, our Rick can hit screaming free kicks and set up play from midfield and looks good for England, where certain others have been missing ‘injured’… so will the Saints be marching in come May? At the top the newlook Arsenal, packed with midfield ers and Opportunist Olivier upfront seem to have hit on a new formula, getting your midfielders like Aaron Ramsey to score the goals. Wonder why nobody thought of it before, Astute, Arsene. Gunners nuked Napoli nicely in midweek too…West Brom Sunday. On Sky’s Monday Night Football besuited Carragher and Neville looking like a couple of solicitors present ing the case against the defence, m’Lord, but were caught playing Subutteo in the pub. Gary’s now showed Jamie how to twiddle the knobs with great dexterity, but Jamie’s accent’s so Scouse you can

barely understand him. Their joint gist was that play ing against effervescent Everton, at threenil down by halftime, Captain Coloccini and his Newcastle defence were a joke. Mind you, with the Toffees’ Romelu Lukako playing out of his skin (were you watching MM, he’s better than temperamental Torres… ), and young Ross Barkley looking the part the new look Everton could be the surprisinglysuper side of the season. Who’s next up for Roberto Martinez’s men? Funny that...following City’s Villafication (even without Benteke and Agbonlahor), the Blues were then mauled midweek in Europe by Bayern Munich at the Etihad. Super Saturday’s shows it’s Everton next at Goodison for City in the early kickoff, later it’s nastyneighbours United visiting new Ballplaying Sunderland. The Redss drew in Europe 1 – 1 with Shakhtar, but were shaken up last week losing at West Brom. Bouncebackability for both... Big test for both Cardiff and Newcastle in Swales, the Capital Cracker Sunday should see Spurs swatting Samsammers. In the Championship Quaintly Pursuing Revival, Burnley and Leicester have pulled four points clear of the chasing pack, down ‘dere dreading da drop are Charlton, Sheffield Wednesday, Yeovil, Bolton and Barnsley, all within one point of each other. Early days though…