Week135

Edition 135

www.thecourier.es

Friday, September 20, 2013

PARAMOUNT AND CORVERA ARE GO! New pledges over theme park and airport

By Alex Trelinski

BABY IN AIRPORT BELT TRAGEDY

The long sagas of Corvera Airport and the Paramount Theme Park appear to be reaching an end game, accord­ ing to Murcia’s politicians.

Murcia President, Ramón Luis Valcarcel told the Regional Assembly this week that the new airport at Corvera will open in April 2014, and will run in tandem with the current facility at San Javier, which will then close in the autumn. Meanwhile, Tourism Minister Pedro Albert Cruz has said that con­ struction work on the Paramount Theme Park will start at the end of the year, despite a delay in the issuing of building licenses.

Valcarcel’s comments over the San Javier shutdown came after the news that the Murcian government had can­ celled its contract with Aeromur for run­ ning Corvera, blaming the company for failing to keep to all the deadlines for opening up the airport. As reported by The Courier earlier this year, the gov­ ernment took legal action to void their contract with Aeromur, on the grounds of failing to meet its contractual obliga­ tions, and they may even sue the com­ pany in the future. Government minis­ ter Antonio Sevilla said that they will be readvertising the operating contract, and that the process could take up to two months, with Sevilla emphasising

that he wanted Corvera to open as soon as possible. President Valcarcel announced this week that the airport authority AENA was committed to shut­ ting down San Javier next autumn, and were on board for an April launch for Corvera.

Construction planning licenses were set to be issued this month for the Paramount Theme Park at Alhama de Murcia, but despite regular pledges this would happen, Tourism Minister, Pedro Albert Cruz has now said that there’s a delay until December and that building work would start as soon as the Alhama council issues licenses for the various parts of the designated park

land.

Cruz said that getting all the neces­ sary documentation takes time and added that considering Spanish bureaucracy, it was something of a tri­ umph that construction work on the project would only start some six months behind schedule. He said that clearance of the site with the removal of trees is about to get underway. He added that building works would con­ tinue until the end of 2015, with the park opening soon after, and that there were no problems with any financial guarantees from the Premursa compa­ ny, which is running the development of the Paramount Park.

A five­month­old baby died early on Thursday morn­ ing after a horrific accident on a baggage conveyor belt at Alicante­Elche airport. The boy’s family had minutes earlier touched down for the start of their holiday in Denia when tragedy struck.

Exact details of what happened next have not yet been revealed, but airport sources say that the baby 'suffered an accident on the belt.' Paramedics rushed to save the child's life, but it was too late.

Some reports as The Courier went to press, suggest­ ed that the family was British who live in America, whilst other sources said that that they were American and touring Europe.

After exiting the inbound service from Gatwick shortly before midnight, they entered the terminal and arrived at the baggage collection area. It is believed the accident happened on the special bag­ gage belt area ­ which is reserved for the collection of larger suitcases, pushchairs and musical instru­ ments.

The parents, who were also travelling with an older child, were taken to the Denia hotel, which they had reserved for their holiday, and were given coun­ selling by Cruz Roja volunteers. A Guardia Civil spokesman said it was investigating the incident, but said it was currently being put down as 'an acci­ dent.'

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Friday, September 20, 2013

Are you a snapper? Do you have a great photo? Send it to design@thecourier.es and if we think it is good enough we will publish it as our Picture of the Week TELEPHONE

96 692 1003 679 096 309 965 99 66 66 E­MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Calle Luis Canovas Martinez 1. Urb Aguas Nuevas, Torrevieja 03183, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 692 1003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon ­ Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Alex Trelinski CONSULTANT EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 966 921 003 679 096 309 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Patrick International Rep 5 Languages Tel 685 901 265 Writers Donna Gee Sally Bengtsson Jeanette Erath Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Tony Mayes John McGregor

Affiliations

Picture of the Week

JUNGLE DRUMS

Sunset over San Miguel PICTURE TAKEN BY DAVE SHRIVE

A LIFE OF FABRA VALENCIA’S regional president, Alberto Fabra, has come under fire for 'extravagance' as the region continues to struggle with austerity, tax hikes and spending cuts.

The Comunidad Valenciana has some of the highest tax rates in Spain, and has recently hiked inheritance tax as well as owing millions of Euros to its health cen­ tres, hospitals, schools and pharmacies. Fabra at the same time though has been found to be spending money on twenty personal staff members.

Several thousand teach­ ers have been made redun­ dant and class sizes increased to 35 or 40 in State schools in the region, with some buildings like the Príncipe de España school in Rojales in urgent need of

NOT A GAS

TWO bogus gas men have been arrested and charged with stealing from the homes of elderly people around Alicante City. National Police said they mainly stole jewellery

Publication Published by Rainbow Media, S.L. Printed by Localprint S.L Depósito legal A ­ 132 ­ 2011 The Courier, its publishers, members of staff and its agents do not accept responsibility for claims by advertisers nor can it be held responsible for any errors in advertisements which are reproduced from poor artwork, low qual­ ity electronic data or inadequate instruc­ tions for text or other layout features.

Further no responsibility is accepted for any loss or damage caused by an error, inaccuracy or non­appearance of any advertisement, although all advertise­ ments produced are checked prior to insertion. We regret that we cannot accept responsibility for more than ONE incorrect insertion and that no re­publi­ cation will be granted in the case of typographical or minor changes which do not affect the value of the advertise­ ment. E&OE. NO PART OF THIS NEWSPAPER MAY BE REPRODUCED WITHOUT THE WRITTEN CONSENT OF THE PUBLISHERS.

replacement. Meanwhile, Fabra has sixteen consult­ ants, three chauffeurs and a personal chef working for him. The 950­page itinerary of staff and their functions within the regional govern­ ment has been published in accordance with federal law, but due to its size, some delays were experienced in finally uploading it online. Its purpose was to 'ensure ade­ quate planning of human resources needs and facili­ tate selection processes' within the Generalitat Valenciana's headquarters.

The press office has 32 staff members, of which 16 are consultants, three are chauffeurs and one a chef – all serving the president of the Generalitat – plus two secretaries working for Fabra, one general and one private. A total of 21 journal­

and had pre­booked appointments on the phone.

The two men were arrest­ ed in the centre of Alicante city after police searched their car, finding a variety

ists covering all regional government ministries, plus a photographer and two camera operators, a publi­ cist, a head of the corre­ spondence and diary team, a budget management tech­ nician, a specialist in admin­ istration and protocol, plus several public policy, docu­ mentation and economic studies analysis managers are all employed within the government headquarters.

Various document and sta­ tistics analysts and European Union relations managers, plus assistant managers in all departments make up the rest of the cler­ ical and supervisory staff.

Catering jobs include a maître d'hôte in charge of the dining hall and kitchen, wine cellar, preparation and managing of official lunches and dinners provided in of stolen items. Officers also found fake docu­ ments, contracts, gas bills and estimates of services they had supposedly car­ ried out, tools and installa­ tion kits and equipment inscribed with 'Servicio Técnico de Gas'.

The bogus “technicians” would phone to make

locations outside the Generalitat offices, plus waiting staff for lunches and dinners even when there are just a few diners and serving the heads of government

personally.

Others are employed to maintain and monitor equipment such as tablecloths and serviettes, cutlery, crockery and glass­ ware.

appointments to check the gas installations.

On arrival, one of the men would talk to the home­ owner, the other would case out the property, stealing anything valu­ able, while pretending to be servicing the gas equipment. Once the booty was in the bag, the

two men then completed their visit by charging their victim for their serv­ ices.

The two arrested men, aged 26 and 38, have a criminal record of pre­ tending to be gas mainte­ nance employees.

WANTED – MORE HEADLINE NEWS! DO YOU have a story that might grab the headlines?

What’s all the gossip about round your way? A spate of robberies, perhaps – or maybe you’ve spotted a celebrity in the neighbourhood. Whether your news involves fire, police, ambulance, accidents – or hap­

pier events like family weddings (particularly Golden and Diamond ones!), Just phone the Courier office on 966 921 003 or email office@thecourier.es We’re waiting for your call…and next week’s Front Page story.

Friday Sunny High 27 Low 18° Chance of rain 0% Monday Partly cloudy High 27 Low 18° Chance of rain 0%

Tuesday Sunny High 26° Low 17° Chance of rain 0%

Saturday Sunny High 26° Low 18° Chance of rain 0% Wednesday Sunny High 27° Low 15° Chance of rain 0%

Sunday Sunny High 27° Low 17° Chance of rain 0% Thursday Sunny High 26° Low 15° Chance of rain 0%

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Friday, September 20, 2013

BIG BULL DEMO

NEARLY 15,000 people protested in Madrid last weekend against one of Spain's most famous bull­ fighting tournaments, the Toro de la Vega, which began on Tuesday.

Although previous demonstrations have taken place in the town of Tordesillas in the northern part of central Spain, the organisers wanted more publicity and so moved to the capital. Members of the Partido Animalista – an animal rights inde­ pendent political party which as yet has no repre­ sentation in the central government – say both the right­wing PP and the left­wing PSOE are 'responsible' for the 'cruel and barbaric' act of the Toro de la Vega.

The PP is in government in the region of Castilla y León, and the PSOE in the town of Tordesillas. “It's time to address both par­

ties directly and hold them accountable for the cruel­ ty,” said a spokeswoman for the Partido Animalista.

Demonstrators snapped a

lance in half – the type used to spear bulls in the ring – as they read out manifestos in front of the PP headquarters and the

PSOE central office in Madrid. They called the Toro de la Vega 'an iconic display of animal cruelty' and said it is one of the

most 'savage and brutal' of its type in Spain. But the Partido Animalista admitted to doubting whether either the left or

the right will bother taking action 'unless and until it affects their own interest­ s'. Meanwhile, 20 of the bulls intended for the fes­ tivities in Tordesillas went missing on Sunday with town officials not ruling out sabotage. The bulls were in a meadow close to where the event took place on Tuesday.

The event itself saw 12 people suffer injuries according to the Red Cross, after young men in jeans or shorts and t­ shirts chased the 580­kilo beast, called Vulcano, through Tordesillas. It was slaughtered after crossing a bridge into a meadow where it faced crowds of people. Most of the injured 12 suffered cuts and bruises but two peo­ ple had broken bones, whilst another, press pho­ tographer Pedro Armestre, was gored in the right thigh.

COPS NET “PREMIER LEAGUE” VILLAIN

SPANISH police have arrested a British fugitive accused of helping to hide a one­eyed killer who gunned down two unarmed policewomen in Manchester last year. The suspect, 41­year­old Marvin Herbert from Liverpool, was wanted by Manchester Police for allegedly help­ ing killer Dale Cregan evade capture. 30 year old Cregan was given life in June for murdering policewomen Nicola Hughes and Fiona Bone, "in cold blood" at a Manchester house. At the time Cregan, a notorious drug dealer with a false left eye made of black onyx, was already on the run for killing a man and his son. in what prosecutors said was a family feud.

The first of those killings dated to May 2012, after which Herbert was suspected of helping Cregan to disappear under the

radar. Spanish offi­ cers seized Herbert near a gym in Marbella and must now go before the National Court in Madrid, where a judge will rule whether to extradite him back to the UK. Herbert has previ­ ous “form”, and was branded a “Premier League” criminal by a judge at Woolwich Crown Court when he was jailed for five­and­a­half years in 2003 as part of a “Yardie hit­squad”.

On his release, he moved to Spain and set up business providing security for beach front bars in the rich resort of Puerto Banus on the Costa del Sol. He was involved in a number of shooting and violent incidents that caught the eye of the Spanish police, includ­ ing being arrested for assault in 2011, as well being shot in an argument two years earlier, which featured conflicting witness reports in addition to changes in statements.

BAD VINTAGE

TWO elderly men have died after inhaling fumes from fermenting wine in a Costa Blanca farm­ house. The incident hap­ pened around 10.00pm

on Tuesday in a cottage in the Berdica area of Benissa in the north of Alicante Province. The 69 and 72 year old vic­ tims were already dead

when paramedics arrived on the scene, with the Guardia Civil investigating the circum­ stances behind their deaths.

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Friday, September 20, 2013

LIGHT UP OR LOSE IT JUSTICE: - 12 YEARS ON

SPAIN could lose a multi Euro project if the government does not relax on the country’s anti­smoking laws. That’s a stark warning issued by Madrid’s regional presi­ dent, who is worried about the Eurovegas complex of casinos and hotels set to be built just outside the city.

Eurovegas is set to bring millions of euros worth of investment and potentially tens of thousands of jobs to a region hit hard by a recession, but questions have been raised about the financing of the proj­ ect and the legal framework on which the deal has been built.

Ignacio González said: "We are running the serious risk that Eurovegas will end up elsewhere. If we're not smart, we could lose it."

Eurovegas is the brainchild of the US casino billionaire Sheldon Adelson, 79, who wants the Spanish government to adapt the law to allow smoking in his casi­ nos, which is currently banned. A health ministry spokesman said: "The Madrid

regional government wants an exception to the law but our concern is the health of our citizens. At the moment, there is no plan to change the law. But we are always open to dialogue."

The law stopping smoking inside public places was brought in nearly 3 years ago, and Sheldon has warned that he will delay the project if he does not get his way. The Madrid President has said that the central government needed to solve the problem as soon as possible, describing the project as being good "not just for this region, but for the whole of Spain". Eurovegas has caused controversy from the moment it was first announced in 2012, with anti­ gambling campaigners, Catholic bishops and anti­capitalists saying it will not bring in the financial benefits claimed by Sheldon's company Las Vegas Sands.

The vast complex of casinos, hotels and conference centres is planned for Alcorcón, a dormitory town on the outskirts of the Spanish capital.

CITY STAND OFF

Three men who drugged and gang­raped a British holidaymaker at knife­ point in the Costa Del Sol have been jailed for the attack ­ 12 years after it took place.

Francisco Santiago, his brother Mariano, and their cousin David Santiago were all sentenced to four years in jail for the 2001 assault. Police failed to identify the trio at the time, but Francisco was arrest­ ed in 2010 for an unrelated

crime, and officers matched his DNA to a sample taken from the vic­ tim's clothing at the time.

The woman had been on a night out in the resort of Benalmadena when she reportedly got separated from her friends.

She accepted a lift home from the men, who then took her to a waste ground, forced her to take a drug at knife­point, before being repeatedly raped. She reported the

attack on the same day.

The woman gave evidence at the trial in Malaga via a video link from Britain.

The woman told the court: "They were laughing and doing whatever they want­ ed. I was scared and felt I had to be compliant. They pushed me on the ground after they finished and took my shoes. I col­ lapsed. Next thing it was morning. I was in the mountains with no houses around."

Checking the checkers

EU officials are going to be checking the traffic checks at the Spain­Gibraltar this Wednesday, after a big diplomatic bust up over long delays for people leaving the Rock. Spain imposed strict checks at the border in protest at the creation of an artifi­ cial reef in disputed waters by the British ter­ ritory's government. The row led to diplomat­ ic tensions between the UK, Gibraltar and Spain over the summer.

On Tuesday a spokesman said the European Commission President, Jose Manuel Barroso had spoken with the

Spanish Prime Minister, Mariano Rajoy.

"They decided that the mission ­ as was agreed on August 19th ­ will visit the border between Spain and Gibraltar, on September 25th to assess border controls and the free movement of people and goods, including fraud and smuggling. It was also agreed that the complaints made by Spain regarding the dumping of concrete blocks and re­sanding in the context of the Eastside project will be dealt with in parallel and with the necessary thoroughness by the European Commission."

MEN OVERBOARD

A man has been charged with attempted murder after a stand­off in a Murcia City Centre apartment on Tuesday.

The 40 year old drug addict, named as Julio, threatened a doctor and a nurse with knife, after his mother and sister had phoned the authorities to warn them that he was “suffering a crisis”. The medical staff left the apartment and the local police were called in. When they arrived, they were shot at as they tried to open his door which had been blocked by a chair.

Burruezo Street and the surrounding area were then cordoned off as a 15 hour stand­off took place with trained negotiators, which eventually ended with officers storming the flat and taking away the almost naked man firstly to Arrixaca Hospital.

Catral canned

Dogs in Catral now have two special areas where they can empty their bowels without caus­ ing offence. The council has lashed up two spots, one in Arbellon Park and the other in the green area next to the industrial estate, which also feature “Pee­ Cans” in which dog owners can dump their furry friend’s business in a plastic bag.

OPEN ALL HOURS

Torrevieja’s shops will be able to open all week and all year round from October, if they choose to do so. The Valencian Government has given the green light to Torrevieja council’s request to be Murcia was disrupted for two hours over classified as a large tourist the lunchtime period whilst the body was area, and it will be able to removed. Six other people have been follow suit with the Orihuela killed on the track in the same area over Costa’s move to liberalise opening hours as from the the last eleven years.

On the wrong track

A man died after being hit by a train on Saturday morning south of Alicante city.

The incident happened at San Gabriel and he was believed to be a local fisher­ man. Services between Alicante and

Two men were picked up off the Alicante coast after a sea rescue on Wednesday after­ noon. An 18 metre long motor yacht, called Racell, had keeled over some 14 miles offshore from Cabo de las Huertas. The crewmen activated an emergency beacon and were picked up unharmed from a raft and taken back to Alicante.

weekend of the 5th and 6th of October.

Torrevieja’s commerce councillor, Agustina Esteve, said that the city was grant­ ed permission for a variety of reasons to do with tourism including the large number of second homes and tourist accommodation in the area, in addition to events like the annual Habaneras Singing festival

Friday, September 20, 2013

PAXO’S GOOD ADVICE IF you know somebody back in the UK who is planning to buy a home in Spain , then the British Embassy is offering plenty of free and helpful advice at ‘A Place in the Sun Live’ at the National Exhibition Centre in Birmingham from Friday September 27th to 29th.

Potential Spanish property buyers can also get lots of consumer­friendly informa­ tion from a new Foreign Office video which can be found on YouTube, or on gov.uk as well as other websites. The video is packed with advice on how a potential buyer should do their homework before taking the plunge.

Spain continues to be amongst the most popular choices for Britons buying homes overseas, despite the economic crisis and well­publicised property scandals. According to the Spanish College of Registrars, over the past three years Britons have bought more than 12,000 properties in Spain, repre­ senting nearly one in five of all properties bought by foreigners.

Most have bought properties without experiencing any issues. But this is little comfort to the minority caught up in serious property problems who suffer the emotional distress and personal and financial effects.

The departing British Ambassador to Spain, Giles Paxman, explains what the British Embassy has been doing: “Although we cannot take action on individual cases, we continue to engage with the Spanish authorities at all levels to encourage them to address property issues affecting British nationals.

“We have seen the devastating effect property problems can have and we want to help prospective buyers avoid the potential pitfalls. They can visit the Spain­specific property advice pages on gov.uk, watch the

FCO’s new video on YouTube and talk to our staff at the ‘A Place in the Sun’ exhibition.

“All three offer helpful tips that will help future buyers purchase safely so that they can enjoy all the wonderful things that living in Spain can offer.”

Mr Paxman concludes: “One thing that just about everyone affected by property problems says is that they want to make sure other people don’t go through the same situation. People already living here can play an important role, by encouraging friends and family to do their research and get impartial legal advice before moving abroad.”

Foreign Office staff will be on Stand B32 at ‘A Place in the Sun Live’. More information about the event can be found at www.apla­ ceinthesun.com

A night of Spanish culture at “Viva España” Don’t miss it. It is a fabulous night out at a really affordable price. Dusk starts to fall as we trav­ el between the thousands of orange trees which fill the fields of the aptly named Costa Azahar (The Orange blossom coast): In the distance we can see the double peaked roof of “Viva España”. Built in the style 2 Barajas side by side.

The Baraja was a typical dwelling house of, 10th century Spain. As ”Viva España draws nearer excited gasps go round the coach at the sight of Olive skinned, young men astride their magnificent mounts dis­ playing their fantastic equestrian skills in the glare of the floodlit arena. As our coaches pull to a stop attractive young ladies in colourful flamenco dresses step forward to offer us a welcoming drink of that great Spanish favourite – Sangria.

The horses trot run and dance.

Sometimes the young ladies dance with them. The atmosphere is electric.

Later we enter into the warm welcoming atmosphere of the restaurant and theatre area. Smartly dressed smiling waiters serves quality 3 course meal with wine. As the meal

draws to an end the lights go down and the stage fills with s w i r l i n g dancers. The insistent sound of feet drum­ ming on the stage, mixes with the sound of the Valencian box drums and intensely mov­ ing sound of tra­ ditional Spanish songs. We are drawn into the performance as though we were actually a part of it. Which, with a stage which we can almost touch is almost true. It is with great disappointment that the show finally draws to an end. But this does give us the chance to join the performers on stage to allow us to take photographs with them, before the music strikes up and gives us a chance to dance the rest of the night away on a spacious dance floor. This exclusive night is offered jointly by David’s Coachtrips and Viva España.

A one night only event on October the 4th.

And only costs 45€.

Reservations can be made online at www.coachtripsonline.com or by calling direct on (0034) 966785910. Coaches will run from in and around Costa Orihuela, Torrevieja, Gran Alacant, Alicante City, Campello, Benidorm and Altea.

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Friday, September 20, 2013

editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

Start giving a hoot, cyclists!

I USED to have sympathy for cyclists – but I’ve seen enough this last cou­ ple of weeks to realise that most of them don’t give a hoot about motorists.

I’m talking about people like the lone rider wearing a red top whose self­

ishness forced a convoy of vehicles to follow him all the way through Los Montesinos on Sunday.

It would have been simple for him to tuck his bike into an empty park­ ing bay and allow the ever­increasing line of cars to pass.

But this guy was clearly on a mission because he made no attempt to leave the main carriageway, mak­ ing it impossible for any­ one to pass.

Motorists are constantly asked to ‘think bike’ – but the argument goes two ways. You’ve ot to give us respect too.. and since we travel a lot quicker than you, it would be courteous if you at least made an effort to keep the traffic flowing.

Having been away from the UK for many years, I have no idea how much of a problem cyclists are on the roads of Britain. (I guess a cyclist would say cars are the problem).

But I do know there are a lot more road fatalities in Spain than in England.

Why? I guess there are many reasons ­ the main one being that Spain seems to have more mad motorists than any other country in the world.

They overtake on round­ abouts, they tailgate you when you are driving at the speed limit, they even risk going past you when there’s traffic coming in the opposite direction.

Spain needs to be a little more safety conscious.

The authorities need to get the lunatics off the roads.

We are all vulnerable to their aggression and none more so than stupid cyclists who don’t bother to wear helmets.

ROAD RANTER, Quesada

PROXY VOTING: A PRESIDENT’S VIEW I AM writing in response to the letters that have been sent regarding proxy votes.

I would like to speak up on behalf of presidents like myself who get a lot of proxy votes from owners that are unable to attend the AGM. The reason for this in my case is because the vast majority are happy with the way our Urbanisation is run and the way it looks ­ and are more than happy for me to vote on their behalf .

I do understand that there can be problems with presidents who obtain votes for their own gains, but our proxy forms state quite clearly that; THIS PROXY VOTE INCLUDES THE RIGHT TO SPEAK ON MY BEHALF REGARDING ALL MATTERS DISCUSSED. PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS AUTHORISA­ TION IS GIVEN OF MY OWN FREE WILL .

This way, everyone understands and no­one feels obliged to give their vote if they do not wish to .The vote can be given to anyone whom the owner wishes to vote on their behalf and is sent out every year with the agenda .

We chose to come and live in Spain and this is the way it is done here. We can't expect that because something does­ n't suit us we can change the law .

I have lived on our Urbanisation for the past eight years and have been president for the last six years. I would also like to point out that I don't get paid for doing the job , but do it because no one else wants it. Unfortunately, as in many Urbanisations, there will always be the moaners with too much time on their hands who do nothing to contribute to the community and those that will even go as far as disrupting the AGM .

No wonder owners don't put themselves forward for the job of President when there is so much bad press regarding it .

The job can be quite fulfilling and I have to say as an owner and a President it’s in my best interest to maintain the Urbanisation in the best way I can .

ANGELA CHAMBERS, Orihuela Costa .

DON’T FORGET, WE NEED YOUR DETAILS Letters and emails will only be considered for publication if an address and contact number are provided to confirm authenticity

THE COURIER DOES NOT NECESSARILY AGREE WITH THE VIEWS EXPRESSED IN THE LETTERS ON THIS PAGE

A Walk on the child side I AM organising a spon­ sored walk in aid of the Elche Children’s' Home.

The walk takes place on Saturday 28th September 2013 at 11am from the Kiosko, Cabo Cervera to the Hostel Albir and back which is approximately 4k and takes place along the coast road.

You can bring along

your dog for the walk provided it is on a lead.Water is available and a pooper scooper.

For those not sure of the location, go along the coast road in a northerly direction so sea is on your right until you come to the Hotel Masa. Turn right down the hill and you will come to the Cabo

Cervera Hotel.

Take second turning right going past recep­ tion and then first left.

The kiosko is right in front of you on the right hand side.

For further informa­ tion and sponsor form please contact Lyn on 96 507 7014 or 676 650 210.

LYN ADAMS

Friday, September 20, 2013

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SHAKE ON IT, BILL I HOPE Billy Connolly will take this the right way, but I’d love to shake his hand.

Parkinson’s is no joke, but life on the bright side is better by smiles

If his Parkinson’s symptoms are anything like mine, we wouldn’t even make contact!

As a fellow ‘victim’ (I quote the word ‘victim’ because I have no problem living with the condition), I want Billy to know that Parkinson’s is not the begin­ ning of the end.

It’s the beginning of a new challenge…and a reason to be cheerful rather than fear­ ful. Let’s face it, we’ll both die with it, not from it.

I’ve been living with Parkinson’s for four years, PROBLEM: Billy Connolly during which time my writing hand (the left) has developed are bloated and my legs are a tremor which worsens as gradually weakening. I find it stress levels increase. As a increasingly difficult to stand result, I am often unable to up from a sitting position and write my name – particularly my neck, back and buttocks if someone else is looking ache without a break.

That’s nothing to laugh on.

It’s embarrassing and also about ­ but the consolation is gives me an insight into how that I can still lead an active someone with severe life, unlike those who can’t dyslexia must feel when stand up at all or are struck down by the likes of cancer, a faced with filling in a form.

The bonus for me is that, stroke or a major heart accompanied by my shakes, attack.

In my case, the old heart is I have joined an art class… and have amazed myself by still pumping relatively satis­ producing very acceptable factorily, albeit with the aid of canvases using my RIGHT three stents in my coronary arteries. My response is to hand.

I prefer to shrug off the be grateful that the treatment negatives. The left side of my for angina was carried out body retains water, my hands under national health cover,

leaving me with, wait for it, more money than stents.

Billy Connolly is in a differ­ ent league to me when it comes to making people laugh. But funny men are often the saddest of people away from public gaze.

Remember Tony Hancock?

In the unlikely event of Billy reading this article, I want him to know that noth­ ing need change just because he has Parkinson’s.

I’m only a couple of years younger than him, yet man­ age to combine a limited writing career with an active social life. But I’ll never have the sort of courage another comedy great, Bob Monkhouse, showed in the final weeks of his life.

Bob never lost his brilliant sense of humour and his legacy of laughter taught me to utilise every waking hour now that my body has begun to creak.

A couple of years ago, I wrote an article in which I said I’d found a true inspira­ tion in Monkhouse and believed that the best anti­

Lottery will get you nowhere...

IS Friday the 13th really unlucky? It’s a lottery – you decide.

I’ve always known that Camelot load the UK lottery disproportionately against the punter. If the prizes were awarded according to chances of winning, that measly tanner they dole out for three correct numbers would be at least £57.

Which is why I don’t touch I have always preferred the Irish Lottery, which has fewer num­ bers (45) and where you can get well over 500/1 if the three numbers you select are among the six winning balls. A few years ago, I won THREE times online – includ­ ing a freak double after I put my £1 inter­ net stake on twice by mistake!

Why I stopped liaising with the lep­ rechauns, I have no idea (note to self, must have a little dabble again soon).

Anyway, it’s all been overtaken by EuroMillions, a mere 116­million­to­one jackpot shot, and also costs twice as

much to enter a line as its British equivalent.

I liken both draws to naming six playing cards, then picking those same six from a full pack spread face down in front of you.

Logic says it is impossible – but if more than 14 mil­ lion people attempt it, the odds are that one of them will come up trumps.

It’s a doddle really…and I’ve just come closer to that EuroMillions jackpot than ever. My lucky dip ticket for Friday the 13th gave me 4, 15, 27, 33 and 48, with 6 and 10 as the star numbers. The draw itself threw up 4, 6, 14, 27 and 33 with 5 and 10 as lucky stars.

Has 14 been 15, and 5 been 6, I would have won €6,600. Instead, my 654/1 hoard of three correct numbers and one lucky star – a 654/1 chance ­ made me just over 13 euros richer.

Unlucky for some? Well, at least I don’t have to pay tax on it.

BRAVE: Bob Monkhouse dote to illness and ageing is laughter.

When Bob knew he was dying from prostate cancer, he not only kept smiling ­ he incorporated it into his act.

Not long before his death, he joked on Michael Parkinson’s chat show that

when his doctor told him his right now haranguing St illness was terminal, he Peter with his one­liners.

In the meantime, I have asked: ‘How long do I have?’’ told my kids and grandkids I ‘‘Ten,’’ said the doctor. ‘‘Is that weeks, months. want to hear them singing at my funeral, not being just what exactly?’’ asked Bob. The doctor looked at his plain miserable.

Top of my posthumous pop watch. plan are a couple of chorus­ “Nine, eight, seven...’’

That wisecrack reignited es of 'Always Look on the my belief that when old age Bright Side of Death’. And I and/or illness strike, the most have no objection if they effective way to fight it is to want to throw in a line or two have a little giggle about life, of ‘I Was What I Was’.

I won’t be able to join in, of no matter how difficult that course – but I’m sure I’ll hear may be.

I half expected it, wherever I’m not.

In the meantime, I look for­ Monkhouse to throw in a line about his unique ‘sense of ward to seeing Billy Connolly his own tumour’. He didn’t – but presenting there's a fair bet he is up Parkinson Show.

Now that really would be there in his celestial home

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Friday, September 20, 2013

Friday, September 20, 2013

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Friday, September 20, 2013

FISHY BUSINESS AT CHIPPY My son approached me one summer's day more than 30 years ago and told me that his fixation with the Star Wars character Han Solo had run its course.

'Thanks for letting me know, lad,' I responded with barely­suppressed joy. For while I was tickled by my boy's vivid imagination, his obsession to hunt down the villainous Darth Vader in the most unlikely of places, including the local fish and chip shop, had been steadily driving me nuts.

More than once I had received an irate phone call from the chippy owner com­ plaining that my son was lurking about.

'Lurking about?' I queried.

'Surely you mean larking about? Or perhaps you meant to say lurking around?'

'This is no time to be pedantic,' said the chippy man. 'I'm just warning you that if your son doesn't cease getting under my feet, he is in grave danger of falling into

the deep fish fryer and risk­ ing a battering. And by the way, that mate of your son's, who is always with him, is no better.'

'Oh, that's not his proper pal,' I pointed out. 'My boy latched onto this other lad only because the latter is extremely tall and hairy.'

'I don't understand,' said the fish and chip shop man.

'Chewbacca?' I ventured.

'Chewbacca is the big, shag­ gy Wookiee creature who is Han Solo's first mate and companion on his space­ ship.'

There was an uneasy silence. 'Star Fish . . . er, I mean Star Wars?' I offered by way of further explana­ tion. The voice at the other end of the phone growled: 'Just come and collect the pair of them, will you. I'm try­ ing to run a business here.'

After dropping young Chewbacca off at his house, I took my boy home. 'All I want to know, Son, is why you keep hanging about at the chippy.'

'Because nobody would

think of looking for Darth Vader there, Dad. Who would ever expect to find the most evil villain in the Empire working undercover as hired help at a suburban chip shop. The guy's gone all devious since he went to the dark side of the Force.'

'But that's ridiculous!' I pointed out. My son laughed.

'That's what the fish and chip shop owner said. Mind you, I might try the district library tomorrow on the off­chance that Vader is cataloguing books in the sci­fi section.'

But then came the great day when my lad informed me that he was no longer Han Solo, intrepid hero of the Rebel Alliance.

Even Chewbacca had packed in his role­playing and had allowed his mother to drag him off to the barber's for a haircut.

I clutched my son to my bosom. 'Welcome back, lad.

Now you can concentrate on studying for your upcoming school exams.'

'Steady on, Dad,' said my son. 'It's goodbye Han Solo .

. . and hello Indiana Jones!'

And he produced a plastic bullwhip from behind his back and cracked it in the air.

My blood ran cold, my marrow chilled. I hadn't felt that shivery since I fell into the fish finger freezer cabinet at the supermarket.

The situation deteriorated over the following months.

Borrowing his grandfather's battered trilby hat and old leather jacket, my first­born made frequent sorties onto the West Pennine Moors in search of the Ark of the Covenant. If the weather was lousy, he would hunt for it indoors, usually in our attic.

Indiana's . . . sorry, my son's mother wasn't that bothered. 'It's just a phase he's going through,' Mrs S insisted. 'Remember how our boy used to pretend he was Andy Pandy, sleeping in the dog's basket curled around the head off my old floor mop which he named Looby Loo.' 'Yeah,' I said. 'Our poor Yorkie had to snooze behind the sofa. And I also remem­ ber being summoned to see

the primary school head­ mistress because our son jumped onto the teacher's lap every after­ noon when the final bell sound­ ed and warbled:

"Time to go home, Time to go home, Andy is waving good­ bye."'

Mrs S stared accusingly at me. 'But he's not the only one in this family who causes embar­ rassment.'

I stared back. 'The only reason I still wear my Davy Crockett coonskin cap is that it keeps me warm. I never did fully recover after you shoved me into the fish finger freezer at Tesco.'

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Friday, September 20, 2013

SAY IT IN SPANISH Learn the lingo - with a little help from JEANETTE ERATH Spanish 89 Here are the answers from last weeks questions: I bought a shirt yesterday – yo compré una camisa ayer, she worked for two hours – ella trabajó por dos horas, you wrote a let­ ter – escribiste una carta, they sold the car – ellos vendieron el coche, I practiced the piano for an hour – yo practiqué el piano por una hora, we danced the tango last night – bailamos el tango anoche, I took twenty photos of my cat – yo saqué veinte fotos de mi gato, I watched tele­ vision last night – yo miré la television anoche, you sold your house – tú vendiste tu casa, we ate pizza – comimos pizza, I drank orange juice this morning – bebí zumo de naranja esta mañana, they bought a car last year – com­ praron un coche el año pasado, you all bought popcorn – vosotros comprasteis palomitas, John and Julia played the guitar for two hours at the reception – tocaron la guitar­ ra por dos horas en la recepción, you watched the film – tú viste la película, she called me three times – me llamó tres veces, what did you get for your last birthday? ­ ¿qué recibiste para tu último cumpleaños?

I hope you managed to get them all correct, all tenses in Spanish are important of course however the fact that there is more than one past tense in Spanish makes it seem more difficult to master, it does take more work to learn these tens­ es, or more specifically when to use them, than other tenses, but with a bit more work and studying it is posible to use the correct tense when talking in the past.

verbs which have to be learnt and remembered, as you will see there is a form that they follow however remembering which verbs are irregular is the hard bit.

The following irregular verbs in the preterite take the follow­ ing endings: ­e, ­iste, ­o, ­imos, ­isteis, ­ieron Andar (to walk) changes to anduv­ plus the ending: anduve, anduviste, anduvo, etc.

Estar (to be) changes to estuv­ plus the ending: estuve, estuviste, estuvo Tener (to have) changes to tuv­ : tuve, tuviste, tuvo Caber (to fit) changes to cup­ : cupe, cupiste, cupo Haber (aux. to have) changes to hub­ : hube, hubiste, hubo Poder (to be able to, can) changes to pud­ : pude, pudiste, pudo Poner (to put, place) changes to pus­ : puse, pusiste, puso Saber (to know) changes to sup­ : supe, supiste, supo Hacer (to make/do) changes to hic­ : hice, hiciste, hizo, hicimos, hicisteis, hicieron Querer (to want) changes to quis­ : quise, quisiste, quiso Venir (to come) changes to vin­ : vine, viniste, vino I hope you noted the change in Hacer where the c was replaced by z only in the third person singular, he/she form.

Note also there are no accents on these endings so remem­ ber where the stress falls.

Ser and Ir have the same form in the preterite, but the mean­ ing will come from the context of when it is used, also ser So we are going to carry on with the preterite tense, remem­ tends to be used less in the preterite. ber this is the past that happened at a specific time or occa­ Conjugations of ser and ir: ser – I was, you were, he was, sion, one that answers the question ´when?´ or ´for how etc. Ir – I went, you went, he went, etc.

Yo fui, tú fuiste, él/ella fue, nosotros fuimos, vosotros long?´ fuisteis, ellos/ellas fueron We learnt the regualr verbs and some with spelling changes The verbs traer (to bring) and decir (to say/tell) conjugate in in the ´yo´ form, now we are going to move on to the irregular a similar way:

Decir: yo dije, tú dijiste, él/ella dijo, nosotros dijimos, vosotros dijisteis, ellos/ellas dijeron Traer: to traje, tú trajiste, él/ella trajo, nosotros trajimos, vosotros trajisteis, ellos/ellas trajeron The following verbs conjugate the same way as traer.

Atraer (to attract) – atraje, etc; distraer ( to distract) – dis­ traje, etc. Retraer (to bring back/dissuade) – retraje, etc.

Sustraer (to remove/take away) – sustraje, etc.

The verbs dar and ver conjúgate very simliarly in the preterite so they can be learnt together, note no accent marks: Dar – (I gave, you gave, etc) yo di, tú diste, él/elladio, nosotros dimos, vosotros disteis, ellos/ellas dieron Ver – (I saw, you saw, etc) yo vi, tú viste, él/ella vio, nosotros vimos, vosotros visteis, ellos/ellas vieron.

There is a lot to learn with this tense so I am going to leave it there for this week and give you some translations to com­ plete, they will be from this week and last week so keep on your toes as you are translating!

We arrive at twelve o´clock every day, They travelled last month, you went to school this morning, someone came to my house last weekend, we made the beds this morning, I put he clothes in the wardrobe, What did you do last night?

What did you tell her? They had an accident last Tuesday, They didn´t go yesterday because they went last week , They sang five songs, I read my messages last night, he was my best friend for ten years, I went to las Vegas last January, it was wonderful! Did you see John yesterday? When they saw me, they gave me the newspaper.

Take your time and as ever read out loud as you complete the sentences in Spanish. ¡Que tengas una buena semana!

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I’ve been doing an experi­ ment over the past week that has surprised me. Until my dying day, I will always be learning something new about dogs as they are my passion and they continually teach me something new! I have seven dogs and all of them are very different. Billy my German Shepherd is very lazy and if he were to join the police, they would have sacked him within a week!

Lola, my female German Shepherd, is the most loyal and devoted dog I have ever met in my entire life. She is a velcro dog and is stuck to my right leg. Pickle my Border Collie wants a job ­ any job!

Pedro Rodriguez, my little Spanish mixed dog has the biggest character I have ever seen in a dog. Left to his own devices, he would now be the ruler of Espana! Sanchez Rodriguez, another of my lit­ tle Spanish mixes, we call a Buddhist. He is the calmest dog you will ever meet and seems to be constantly med­ itating! Lima, the dog I res­ cued from Granada, who had her two front legs broken as a puppy, is a thief and her nickname is The Ginger Ninja! Finally there is Ria, a Spanish, German Shepherd mixed dog, who I rescued

Friday, September 20, 2013

RIA TEACHES ME SOMETHING NEW along with her litter mates and mother, from a dog pound last year. They all had distemper and out of the ten puppies, five died, including Nelly, who was going to be mine. I found them all homes and Ria stayed with me. To say that Ria is a challenge would be an understate­ ment. I sincerely believe the distemper damaged her brain, but just recently I seem to be making progress with this chal­ lenging and most loving of dogs.

You see normally, I have always tried to drain her energy with the launcher and ball, or the bike, as she is constantly bursting with ener­ gy. But over the last week, rather than taking her out and keep throwing the ball for her and my other dogs, I have simply been taking them on very calm walks,

RIA WITH LAZY BILLY BEHIND HER through the Spanish moun­ tains. None of them this week have been physically pushed to their limits and they are all, including Ria, acting a lot calmer around the house than they normally do. This got me thinking and my conclusion is this. When I take all the dogs out to play ball, their adrenaline is run­ ning very high. So even

when the game is finished and we return home, they are still not as calm as they could be, with some of them even starting to play in the house, minutes after we return. I imagined how I would be if I were to play in a football match that I really enjoyed and then went straight home.

I would not be relaxed and would still be high on adrena­

line. Maybe it is just com­ mon sense and it should have dawned on me long ago, but it didn't.

Walking through the Spanish mountains and countryside, they have all been off lead and simply enjoyed having a good old fashioned sniff around, with the odd roll in the dirt.

Just the smelling itself will tire a dog. That is why police sniffer dogs can only work a certain amount of time before they need to rest. For me it has been a very impor­ tant week, because I have learnt something new. I was always of the belief that if you get a high energy dog, which Ria is, then you really need to physically run them, but this experiment has thrown that way of thinking out of the window. They will all still get to play with the ball, but only now and again, because it

can turn them into adrenaline junkies. And when I do next play ball with them, I will make sure that when the game has finished, that we then walk calmly for a while before we go home. That also makes a lot of sense. So I hope you have also learnt something new here, but maybe you already knew, as I wish I did a long time ago!

I am available for consulta­ tions throughout the Costa Blanca region, if you are hav­ ing problems with your furry best friend. To book a consul­ tation you can email me at peter@thedogyouneed.com and I will contact you straight away.

We have also set up an animal charity, where we help the most severely abused and injured animals in Spain. If you would be kind enough to donate anything to this special cause you can do

by PayPal, where the account details are peter@thedogyouneed.com or to our Nat West charity account, where the sort code is 60­16­03 and the account number is 73754900. Even one Euro will help, so please, please, try and support us.

Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

PETS’ CORNER: CAN YOU TAKE IN A HOMELESS DOG OR CAT? Bella is friendly little girl who is very affectionate and pla­ cid towards people She is fine with other dogs but can find them rather overwhel­ ming at first.

She is about 8 to 12 months old. Please contact K9 or PHONE 600 84 54 20 for more info www.k9club.es

Bella Clyde was abandoned and fending for himself for some time he is now in foster care and looking for a home. He is less than 5kg and is very sweet, affectionate and great with dogs and cats. He is a small terrier type dog born approx in Sep 2012.

Please call 650 304 746

Clyde

Cassie is a Collie Type dog, she is very clever, and learns very quickly. She has a lovely nature, loves people and she is looking for a forever home.

No longer wanted by her owners, she is looking for love. She is in very good health, loves to go for a walk and will make a lovely loyal pet Call 616655789 for more details

IDAHO, with his brother COLORADO are still waiting for their forever homes. We featured them here in April with their 5 brothers and sis­ ters who have all since been adopted. They are a Husky x and Labrador mix and are now nearly 9 months old, fully vaccinated and micro

Cassie

Idaho

chipped. They love going out for walks and they couldn´t be happier, exploring the ‘outside´ world. These two boys have a lovely tempera­ ment and will make super pets. Please call 966710047 or email info@satanimalres­ cue.com

Colorado

Jasmine is 3 months old and was living on the streets and getting what scraps she could from a cafe, she is very affectionate and good with other cats. Call: 645 469 253 www.petsinspain.com

Jasper is a 6 month old poin­ ter cross was bottle fed from just 1 week old, he is chip­ ped, vaccinated and has his pet passport. Call: 634 181 540 www.petsinspain.com

Jasmine

Jasper

Friday, September 20, 2013

Call 966 921 003 NOW!

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Friday, September 20, 2013

MY UNCOMMUNICATIVE FAMILY

Last weekend was a difficult one for me and my son. I am still trying to get my new house straightened out as well as dealing with everything that goes with moving home as well as starting a business and going back to work! Not surprisingly there is always some­ thing that seems to throw a spanner in the works, which is perhaps a trivial way to describe what I’m writing about this week, and it is certainly not a trivial article.

The thing about living so far from friends and family is that if something happens in the UK it is not all that easy to get back. Air travel arrangements are slightly more difficult than just booking a train or getting in a car, so it is easy to feel slightly isolated when we live in a different country from most of our relations.

I was told a month or so ago that my step brother was very sick, and was in the process of being admitted to a hospice for the termi­ nally ill. I haven´t seen him for many years, mainly due to the fact that when I lived in the UK, his mother stopped all contact with his father, my stepdad, so therefore we weren´t close, but he was still family. My sister also told me that he had been looking to move to near where she lives so that he could be close to his dad and his side of the family, but this dream was never to be realised.

I knew that when I came to Spain my life would be different and that I would miss things from the UK, including family issues. But, it was a price I was, and still am, willing to pay. I never got the chance to see Andrew, my step­brother in the hospice and was told last Sunday that he had died on Saturday night. In the great tradition of the internet, I actually found out via a post on Facebook, but I am just glad that my

sister had at least warned me.

I am now wondering whether to go back to the UK for the funeral. It will depend mainly on the timing of it, but I know that Andrew won´t worry if I go or not, and I hope that he knows how much I am thinking of him now he is out of pain and at peace. Seven years ago my grandmother died, whilst I was living here in Spain. My sister decided that the best way to tell me was via a text. Is it because she didn´t think I would care, or because she couldn´t afford to call? I really don´t know but it is one of many examples of my dysfunctional fam­

ily. I have missed a few occasions in the UK like my nephew getting married, though I wasn’t even invited to the wedding.

I am not sure if that was down to family issues or me living in another country, though my sister said it was because he had a lot of family there already and his bride had few people on her side, I didn´t believe this but I had to respect my nephew’s decision. If it wasn´t for Facebook again, I wouldn´t have even known he was getting married, which means the word, dysfunctional may be too polite for my family!

Some things I can accept missing, such as my niece’s finishing school and heading off to university or even my two daughters fin­ ishing primary school and starting in second­ ary, but when it comes to births, deaths or marriages, is it too much to ask for more than a status update on a social networking site?

I wonder if anyone else lacks the commu­ nication skills of my family? I have not spo­ ken to my mother for nearly nine years, as we fell out before I came to Spain and she has made no effort to build bridges and I don´t have the inclination to start. Therefore everything I find out from England comes from my sister, or her daughters, and via the internet.

At the end of the day, I made the decision to come here, and I have no regrets with my life almost 100% better than it was in London. I know who I am and I make my choices as do we all. Having made the decisions, we are the ones that have to live with them, and this I am content to do. I just wish sometimes that my family would not forget me just because I live in another country.

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Friday, September 20, 2013

CLEGG DESERVES CREDIT Nick Clegg would have been worried by an opinion poll the other day that claims 75% of all British voters would never even consider voting for the Liberal Democrats at the 2015 election.

That’s a pretty amazing statistic and scant reward for what Clegg and the party has achieved in coalition with the Tories since 2010. It was never going to be easy having to compromise their position on cer­ tain issues, and the business over stu­ dent tuition fees really had Clegg’s head in a noose.

But that’s what happens in coalition, and the Deputy P r i m e Minister c a n rightly argue that h i s

presence put a block on the nutty Tory right­wingers, much to the relief of the pragmatic David Cameron. We all know that some voters have short memories, as I think I‘m right in saying that back in 2010, the UK economy was tee­ tering on the brink. After that year’s election, the last thing the country wanted was a short­lived

minority Tory government offering no stability and lacking abili­ ty to take tough deci­ sions on get­ ting to grips with the deficit that Labour had left them. It was Clegg and the Lib Dems that stepped up to

the plate and delivered, and yes, of course there was some self­interest as well in grabbing some cabinet seats for the first time. By the way, I can’t also help guffawing at all the pre­2010 surveys say­ ing how people would love to have a coalition government running the UK and that it would be just such a wonder­ ful thing for every­ body!

Nick Clegg’s achievements have been major, includ­

ing raising the income tax start point to 10 thousand pounds, and stopping big inheritance tax breaks for millionaires, as well as a raft of other measures especially in education and the environ­ ment. Crucially there are major signs that the UK economy is recovering, and when the election campaign comes, Clegg will be able to crow about his part in that.

There are many more pluses than minuses for the Lib Dems, yet you still get the feeling that some of his MPs, like Sarah Teather (who is quitting), would like to return to the old days of the Lib Dems having no power and just being a party of protest, collecting votes dumped into their pocket by disaf­ fected Tories and Socialists. The laugh­ able old conference days of long haired sweater and sandal wearing delegates has long gone, and the Lib Dems have a role in government

which has been quite a learn­ ing curve for the party. It was interesting watching some of their conference in Glasgow at the weekend and a quite intelligent level of debate.

The party has come on a bumpy journey, but its voice has been heard for the first time. That’s something that should be remembered by some of their more myopic members who would have preferred to prop up that failed buffoon Gordon Brown back in 2010.

You’ve got to say that Vladimir Putin has excelled himself over the deal to get Syria to hand over its arsenal of chemical weapons. This surely has to be so much better than the firing of missiles, which would have taken many inno­ cent lives. It’s the biggest diplomatic coup for Russia since it was formed out of the old Soviet Union, but why did it take so long? And by the way, which country was it that largely armed the Assad regime to the hilt?

q

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Friday, September 20, 2013

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Friday, September 20, 2013

AUTUMN RECIPES SIMPLE SQUASH RISOTTO Ingredients

1 butternut squash 4 tbsp light olive oil 600ml vegetable stock 50g unsalted butter 1 small onion, finely chopped 1 celery stick, finely chopped 2 garlic cloves, crushed 1 bay leaf 1 tsp fresh thyme leaves, picked 140g risotto rice 100ml white wine 50g parmesan, finely grated

Method

1. Heat oven to 200C/180C fan/ gas 6. Peel the squash and separate the bulbous seed­bearing section from the slender end. Chop the slender end into 2cm cubes, toss in half the oil, season lightly and roast in the oven, stirring occasionally, until golden brown on the outside and soft in the centre, about 30 mins. Cut the bulb in half and scrape out the seeds with a spoon – you can keep these to toast in the oven and sprinkle over salads. Chop the flesh into 2cm pieces. Warm the vegetable stock in a small pan, set over a low heat. Drop in squash and leave to gently poach.

2. While the squash is roasting, warm a medium­size frying pan over a gentle heat. Add the remaining olive oil and half the butter, followed by the onion. Cover and cook for 3 mins until the onion turns translucent. Stir in the celery, garlic, herbs and a few turns of pepper (no salt at this stage). Cover again and cook for a further 2 mins. Increase the heat slightly and stir in the rice. Stir, uncovered, for about 5 mins – this will help to develop the toasty aroma of the rice without burning the veg.

3. Turn up the heat, stir in the wine and let it bubble away to almost nothing. Reduce the heat and start adding the stock.

Add one ladle at a time, stirring gently but constantly during each addition. The idea is to encourage the rice to absorb the liquid and soften, but also give up its starch to thicken the remaining broth. Don’t stir too aggressively or you will end up with a pan of mush. When the stock has been absorbed, it’s time to add the next ladleful and so on. It will take about 15 mins to reach the final ladle of stock. By this time the squash in the stock should have softened. Mash it up with the remaining stock and stir into the risotto.

4. Turn off the heat, dot the top of the risotto with remaining butter and most of the Parmesan, cover, leave to rest for 2 mins, then stir through and check the seasoning. Spoon the risotto into shallow bowls and sprinkle the roasted squash and leftover Parmesan on top. Serve with crusty bread and Sautéed spinach (below).

WILD MUSHROOM TARTLETS Ingredients

375g block all­butter puff pastry flour, for dusting 25g butter 300g mixed wild mushrooms or just one type, cleaned and sliced 25g parmesan (or vegetari­ an alternative), finely grated small handful parsley leaves, chopped 1 garlic clove, finely chopped 1 egg, beaten

Method

1. Roll the pastry out on a floured surface and cut out 4 cir­ cles, about 15cm wide. Leave to chill on a lined baking tray in the fridge.

2. Heat oven to 200C/fan 180C/gas 6. Heat a large frying pan until hot, then add the butter and fry the mushrooms for 5 mins until there is no liquid left in the pan. Season, then take off the heat and mix mushrooms with the Parmesan, parsley and garlic.

3. Score a 1cm border around the edge of each tart, then spoon the mushrooms into the centre circle. Brush the edge with beaten egg, then bake the tarts for 20 mins until puffed up and golden. Serve immediately.

THAI PUMPKIN SOUP Ingredients 1½ kg pumpkin or squash, peeled and roughly chopped 4 tsp sunflower oil 1 onion, sliced 1 tbsp grated ginger 1 lemongrass, bashed a little 3­4 tbsp Thai red curry paste 400ml can coconut milk 850ml vegetable stock lime juice and sugar, for sea­ soning 1 red chilli, sliced, to serve (optional)

Method

1. Heat oven to 200C/180C fan/gas 6. Toss the pumpkin or squash in a roasting tin with half the oil and seasoning, then roast for 30 mins until

golden and tender.

2. Meanwhile, put the remaining oil in a pan with the onion, ginger and lemongrass. Gently cook for 8­10 mins until soft­ ened. Stir in the curry paste for 1 min, followed by the roasted pumpkin, all but 3 tbsp of the coconut milk and the stock.

Bring to a simmer, cook for 5 mins, then fish out the lemon­ grass. Cool for a few mins, then whizz until smooth with a hand blender, or in a large blender in batches. Return to the pan to heat through, seasoning with salt, pepper, lime juice and sugar, if it needs it. Serve drizzled with the remaining coconut milk and scattered with chilli, if you like.

TOMATO CHUTNEY Ingredients 1kg ripe tomatoes, peeled and chopped 750g cooking apples, peeled, cored and chopped 375g light muscovado sugar 250g onions, chopped 250g raisins 1 green pepper, deseeded and chopped 2 tsp salt ½ tsp ground ginger 350ml cider vinegar

Method

1. Put all the ingredients into a large pan and bring to the boil over a medium heat. Stir occasionally until the sugar has dis­ solved. Boil the mixture, uncovered, for about 45­50 mins until the fruit is tender and thickened. Cool, then transfer the mixture to a sterilised jar and seal.

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Friday, September 20, 2013

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services com­ pany on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

ADVICE: David had a problem with his laptop monitor

Q

I have an Acer Aspire 5745 ( i5­450M processor ) approx.18 months old. I presently have a blue vertical line run­ ning top to bottom of the screen; it does not interfere with page content but is very apparent on blank screens ie.start up etc. It is there permanently. Is this something I can cure or do I need to come to your shop?

Hi David, I’m afraid the prob­ lem is a physical one, either the graphics card in your computer is at fault or over­ heating or the screen itself is faulty, the only way that we can check for sure is for us to book an appointment to come out and have a look for you or for you to pop it along to our unit on the Moncayo market – we are there every Saturday until 2pm.

A

ADVICE: Derek was having problems with his Microsoft Outlook archive files.

Hi Richard, I am having problems with my archive. I get the following error message: Error while archiving folder “inbox” in store Derek.dawkins@Thansa.com Path does not exist. Verify the path is correct.

What can I do???

Q

Hi Derek, the path that your computer is referring to is the location of the archive file for Outlook, you can check where your computer “thinks” this is located by going into the Control Panel and double clicking on the “mail” icon, from there you will click on “data files” and then you will see the locations for the mail files, in your specific case you are looking for the location of the archive file, probably called “archive.pst”.

You should make sure that your archive.pst file exists and is in the correct location – this problem has probably occurred because that file has been moved to a different location.

A

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:­ www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

Richard moved to Spain seven years ago hav­ ing left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: Barry wanted to know why his CD’s were only playing on his CD Player and not his friends Hi Richard, You were good enough to resolve a problem I had a while ago and I am hoping you can assist with another. On my old PC with XP I was able to download CDs and DVDs from sites such as Pirate Bay, burn them to disc and then play them on my home/car machines. Occasionally I would lend them to friends who could not always get them to play on their equipment. Now I have WIN 7, I can still download and burn but can only get them to play on the PC itself. None of them will play on my other equipment. Any ideas?? Thanks Barry

Q

A

Hi Barry, you should be able certainly to get music CD’s to work on other devices, although I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that you can legally only do this with your own recorded music. I suspect the problem in your case is that you are burning the music tracks as .mp3 files and not as .wav files, this would mean that they can only be played on a CD player that is capable of playing .mp3 files (they are not uncommon nowa­ days, but probably only on the newer models), whereas if you use .wav file format they will play on any CD player.

You can use Windows Media Player to burn .wav audio files to CD and media player is avail­ able on any computer running the Windows operating system.

Hope that helps.

ADVICE: Alexia wanted to know how to fix a broken AVG installation

Q

Hello Richard, I seem to have an AVG problem, the icon at the bottom of my screen has an exclamation mark on it and when I click onto it, the AVG tells me to RESTART which I do, but it keeps repeating itself and comes back with RESTART in 10mins etc. I've closed down the laptop, and reported it to AVG, but nothing has hap­ pened. Can you advise me please. Alexia Hi Alexia, it sounds as if AVG has got itself into a bit of a loop doesn’t it. Well last week the new version of AVG, version 2013 (don’t ask me what happened to the rest of 2012!) was released so its probably a good time for you to upgrade to the latest version, this will more than likely fix the problem you have.

In order to upgrade you need to download the new free ver­ sion from here… http://download.cnet.com/AVG­AntiVirus­FREE­2013/3000­2239_4­10320142.html … and then run the installation, it will automatically remove the old version when it installs the new one. Hope that sorts your problem out

A

Friday, September 20, 2013

19

20

Liver Spots on Your Hands?

Friday, September 13, 2013

KNOW YOUR PRESCRIPTION DRUGS DR MACHI MANNU’S ADVICE CLINIC

If you have hundred drug been pre­ classes or cat­ scribed a med­ Email your questions and comments to contact@medb.es egories recog­ ication by your nised today, doctor recently, chances are find a second name, generic drugs that belong to drugs from only 5 categories high you’ve been given Acetaminophen. This is this class, and when you are prescribed more than statins (to lower cholesterol), known as the generic name bear in mind that each of half the time. These most pain killers, antidepressants, of paracetamol, and is the these generic drugs can prescribed drug classes are: or an antihypertensive (to name given to paracetamol have dozens of brand Statins for controlling choles­ lower blood pressure). by the government. The third names, you can easily see terol, SSRIs (antidepres­ These groups of drugs are name of paracetamol (N­ how there can be hundreds sants), Narcotic analgesic the most prescribed medica­ acetyl­p­aminophenol) is its of brand name drugs, under (pain killers), Beta Blockers tions, and it is estimated that chemical name from which the drug class ACE inhibitors (anti­hypertensive), and ACE 60% of those over the age of the generic name is usually for treating hypertension. inhibitors (anti­hypertensive).

60 take at least one group of derived. Tylenol and Panadol And there are several other A basic knowledge of these these on a regular basis. are different brand names of drug classes or categories commonly prescribed drug Such statistics really con­ acetaminophen, and so tech­ for treating hypertension­ categories will empower you nically they are exactly the beta agonists, thiazide to make better choices Large brown spots on the back of the hands are caused by firms the need for everyone same as Paracetamol. Apart diuretics, calcium channel regarding your own health. to have a basic understand the aging effects of climate. These spots are often first from generic and brand blockers, etc. Every drug You can learn more about noticed on the arms and hands, then the face. They also of prescribed medications, names, drugs are also classi­ manufactured by the phar­ these commonly prescribed not for the purposes of med­ appear, occasionally, on the chest, back, and less frequently fied according to their mode maceutical industry is classi­ drug classes from our FREE icating yourself (very danger­ on the legs and torso. Called liver spots, but also known as of action, which is the specif­ fied in this manner. What is MEDB HEALTH SEMINAR ous indeed!) but for self­ age spots, brown spots, lentigo, and lipofuscin pigment, they ic way a particular drug important to realise is that on the 26th of September by e m p o w e r m e n t . particularly affect fair­skinned people who have spent much brings about a desired effect brand name drugs are usual­ 11.30 am. The venue is Understanding drug nomen­ of their lives in the sun. on the body. This is some­ ly more expensive than CASA VENTURA SPORTS clature is the first step in Liver spots are a result of your skin trying to protect itself times referred to as its drug generic names. A packet of AND SOCIAL CLUB, CALLE understanding prescribed from sun exposure by producing an overabundance of class. For example drugs Ibuprofen will be far cheaper ARBIZU NO 1, SAN LUIS, drugs.

Every drug in essence melanin. Melanin is the pigment in your skin responsible for that belong to the drug class than say a pack of Espidifen, TORREVIEJA. To reserve has 3 very different names. “splotchy” or uneven tanning. or category called ACE because Ibuprofen is the your seat, Please Call Susan The brand name of a drug is For cosmetic reasons, liver spots can be lightened with inhibitors lower blood pres­ generic name, while on 627371731 the name given to it by the skin­bleaching products or removed by freezing with liquid sure by blocking a particular Espidifen is the fancy brand manufacturer, and a typical FOR A FULL BODY nitrogen (cryotherapy). enzyme produced in the kid­ name of Ibuprofen. Even DIAGNOSTIC SCAN CALL If the spots appear on the hands before old age, you example is Paracetamol. You ney. There are several dozen though there are several DR MANNU ON 965071745 should not try to remove them with bleaches or creams. They may not know it, but if you look closely at some packets should be examined by a doctor, as in rare instances they of paracetamol, you will also could be malignant.

Looking Good Feeling Great

In this series of articles we will be looking at different nutritional information and the latest thinking about the food we eat and products that we apply to our skin, what they are doing to our bodies and with interesting little snippets that may have a huge impact on our health and looks.

This week we are looking at Vitamin C (ascorbic acid) which is essential for making collagen. It is like a “cell cement” and is important in wound healing. It also assists in absorption of iron and the manufacture of certain hormones. Vitamin C is an antioxi­ dant and essential for healthy gums. It may appear on food labels as sodium ascorbate, calcium ascorbate or ascorbic acid. Good sources include citrus fruits, potatoes, sweet potatoes, broccoli, tomatoes and other green and yellow vegetables.

Vitamin C is water soluble, which means that the body is unable to store it and so a daily supply is needed. The recommended daily amount is 40mg but in pre and post­

operative cases and some medical prob­ lems a much higher dose may be recom­ mended. Try to avoid chewable supple­ ments as they may damage tooth enamel.

Things that make it difficult for the body to absorb this vitamin include smoking, oral contraceptives, alcohol, pollution, stress, fried foods and some antidepressant med­ ications.

Vitamin C is also used in many face creams and skin preparations and helps to prevent premature ageing and is especially needed for those of us who have high levels of exposure to the sun.

When you next purchase skin care prod­ ucts read the labels and try to buy products that include Vitamin C. We are happy to answer any questions you may have relating to nutrition and skin care contact us on 722219450 or email info@slimfit­europe.com Lynda Gibson RGN.RHV.Dip Health Ed. Cert Ed. Dip Diet & Nutrition

Friday, September 13, 2013

21

GET THE RIGHT KIND OF OMEGA 3 Q A

I’ve always thought omega­3 is good for the body, and then I can across this article linking fish oil to prostate cancer. I’ll be glad to hear your opinion.

You are right, Omega­3 essential fatty acids are neces­ sary for maintaining optimal health. They are the build­ ing blocks for making cell membranes – the outer covering of every cell in the body. They are also raw materials for the body to make sex hormones, and hormone­like chemicals (prostaglandins) which are found in all your body tissues.

When you do not get enough Omega­3’s from your diet, your body makes do with the best available fatty acids ( those derived from saturated fats) but they lead to the formation of weak structured cell membranes and low quality hormones.

When Omega­3’s are in short supply, you are more likely to experience dry, itchy skin, flare­ups of chronic inflammatory disease (arthritis, psoriasis, and asthma) and women are likely to suffer from period pains and cyclical breast pain.

The deficiency of Omega’s during childhood has been asso­ ciated with an increased risk of allergies, such as eczema, asthma and hay fever later in life. Omega­3 is also vital in pregnancy because it is needed for the development of a baby’s eyes and brain. As you can see, taking Omega­3 supplements is surely very beneficial for your health; howev­ er it all depends on your source of omega­3 – plant or animal source. Apparently it is the animal based omega­3 supple­ ment that has been associated with prostate cancer, and this includes fish oil supplements. Plant based omega­3 was not mentioned in the study that I presume you are referring to.

Nevertheless, that particular research – published in the Journal of the National Cancer Institute – has been described in many quarters as ‘junk science’ because no fish oil or any animal based omega­3 supplement was used in the study. Omega­3 fatty acid exists in 3 forms, DHA

(docosahexaenoic acid) and EPA (eicosapentaenoic acid) and ALA (alpha linolenic acid). ALA is found in plant based omega­3 supplements, while DHA and EPA are found in ani­ mal based omega­3 supplements such as fish oil. Our bod­ ies can convert ALA into DHA and EPA, and studies have shown that this is a better way for the body to receive DHA and EPA, because these forms of omeg­3 are unstable and prone to oxidative damage when exposed to air, making them unsafe as supplements. At MedB, we have always pre­ ferred the plant based sources of omega­3 supplements because being at the cutting­edge of research, we have been aware of the slight risk of oxidative damage associated with fish oil supplements. And for this reason our preferred choice is the unique Nutridan formula from Denmark. Unlike other omega­3 supplements, this one does not oxidise into deadly metabolites when exposed to the atmosphere – the reason why you should get rid of your fish oil supplements over 3 months old. Nutridan Omega­3 supplements is avail­ able from MedB Health Shop for 30 Euros (90 capsules) – one month supply. You can order by calling 965071745.

Delivery is free.

Q

I have a family history of heart disease. 2 of my brothers have now had a cardiac bypass. What can I do to prevent suffering a similar fate?

A

The main cause of heart disease that eventually leads to cardiac surgery is Atherosclerosis, which is a disorder causing the hardening and narrowing of the arteries. In gen­ eral, the symptoms that occur will depend on the part of the body affected. When it occurs in the coronary arteries, which are the arteries that supplies blood to the heart, it may even­ tually cause cardiovascular disorders. As you have a strong family history of heart disease, it is important for you to

understand the associated risk factors. Smoking cigarettes is the main cause of heart disease especially with a family history. Cigarette smoke contains over 4000 chemicals, and many of these chemicals have been linked to all kinds of chronic disease. Ideally no one should smoke, but for some reasons some people cannot give up the habit. For such people, a regular detox with Pectasol will certainly help reduce the harmful effects of cigarette toxins. Pectasol is a scientifically tested agent that binds to heavy metals and toxins in our cells. And these toxins are known to cause car­ diovascular disease. A diet rich in fruits, nuts, beans, fish, poultry, eggs, low amounts of red meat such as the Mediterranean diet has been shown to prevent or reduce the incidence of cardiovascular disease. Vegetables, fruits, red wine are high in the antioxidants: carotene and flavonoids.

Anti­oxidants are very powerful in preventing cardiovascular disease because they are very effective in neutralizing tox­ ins that damage the heart and arteries known as free radi­ cals. Tomatoes contain lycopene, another powerful antioxi­ dant. Red wine is rich in the antioxidants flavonoids and polyphenols. These protect the heart and blood vessels against the damaging effects of free radicals, and also neu­ tralise chemicals that cause inflammation. Legumes, fruits and vegetables lower cholesterol levels. Omega­3 fatty acids protects the heart in many ways, by lowering ‘bad’ cho­ lesterol levels, preventing platelets from clumping together and blocking arteries, improving the lining and flexibility of arteries to prevent artherosclerosis, and also improving oxy­ gen and blood supply to the heart as well as lowering blood pressure. Omega­3 and Pectasol are available from MedB Health Shop. Call 965071745. Delivery is free.

PLEASE SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO contact@medb.es or to the editor of the courier.

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22

Friday, September 20, 2013

23

Friday, September 20, 2013

Tony

Mayes

HE ALWAYS HAS SOMETHING TO SHOUT ABOUT

LE VELL’S HELL CAN’T BE REPEATED

After a tortuous trial, Coronation Street actor Michael Le Vell was found not guilty of 12 charges of child sex charges, includ­ ing rape.

Importantly, the not guilty verdicts were handed down by a jury which comprised eight women and four men.

They obviously concluded that Mr Le Vell's account could be believed more than that of the girl, despite her tears and dramas in court.

The girl had been receiving classes for a chosen career in acting, and she gave a harrowing account of what she claimed Mr Le Vell had done to her over years from the age of 6 to 14. This girl was clearly responsible for putting Mr Le Vell through hell, ruining his life for two years and with the jury's ver­ dict behind us, we must assume her account was perhaps a pack of lies, or shaped by some most unfor­ tunate experiences in her young life. Unless you are present in court, you cannot possibly know every word and gesture which the jury saw.

What this trial has demon­ strated is the injustice of peo­ ple accused of such crimes being named by newspapers and television from the moment they are questioned

by police. The victim remains in anonymity throughout ­ yet the defendant has to endure months of relentless publici­ ty, especially if that person is high profile in the public eye.

It's wrong and there should be a change in the law.

Secondly, it's wrong that the girl involved, who perhaps is guilty of creat­ ing a pack of lies from start to fin­ ish, walks from court, shrugs her shoulders and cares less about the trail of damage she has created. If I was Mr Le Vell I would be dis­ cussing with lawyers bringing an action through the civil courts for damages. A few out and out liars

causing mayhem to others by making up allegations that result in court trials may think twice if they knew they could be sued for damages. The only problem in this is it could dissuade people who were true victims of crime from making allegations. Without question, the very worst alle­ gation anyone can make is to wrongly accuse someone of a sex crime and sadly there seems to me an increasing number of women prepared to do just that. And the cur­ rent witch­hunt of people dig­ ging up allegations from decades past is not only sick; it panders to the worst aspects of human nature with thousands of readers following every nauseous aspect in newspapers while the accused suffers. I whole­ heartedly agree with a com­ ment from TV presenter Philip Schofield: "It's bloody ridiculous a man's life and reputation can be so compre­ hensively trashed in this way." So, here's one way of overcoming this disaster.

Why not keep defendants' identity private until judges review the prosecution case, listening to a "victim's" evi­ dence in private and making a decision whether that evi­ dence was likely to be believed by a jury. It's a job which should be done by the Crown Prosecution Service, but perhaps they are not always fulfilling that duty and simply handing the decision to a jury, with all that means to a man who may be wrong­ ly accused.

The four Indians who raped and killed a 23­ year­old student on a bus were sentenced last week to death by hanging. Good rid­ dance. In a country where a woman is raped every 20 minutes, clearly something Draconian needs to be done to convince the male popula­ tion of India that having sex by force is not the answer.

India's problem is endemic over much of the world ­ where the birth of a male is prized and that of a female is not. Sadly, many female foe­ tuses are aborted, while male ones are not, and the result is a very dangerous population imbalance. India, China, Japan, parts of Africa and the Far East have these serious gender imbalances caused by cultural and reli­ gious beliefs dating back centuries. It's made far worse now because parents can

q

town environment had under­ went a miraculous improve­ ment with kids being creative rather than destructive. And perhaps it could start in have scans before birth and Spain, where there are street decide in greater numbers to eyesores everywhere.

Do you remember when abort girl foetuses. It has the Performing Rights brought about a situation that there are millions of men in Society told UK businesses their teens, 20s and 30s who they had to buy licences if have no prospect of mar­ their staff listened to music at riage, or, more importantly, work? I had radios at my having any kind of normal newspaper office, not to lis­ sexual relationship with a ten to music but to monitor woman. How culture and local and regional news religion can be so misguided slots. But just in case the dial baffles me. Skewed religion was turned to a music chan­ has inflicted so much dam­ nel and the company was age in the world and is con­ caught with staff tuning in tinuing to do so. Until people without a licence, all the are educated to question radios had to go. But not so every single aspect of what the police it seems, because religious elders indoctrinate bosses paid out £660,952 for believers into thinking, this licences so that staff could sadness will go on. What listen to music in their offices these four young men did to last year! It's cost the Met the girl in this dreadful sex Police and London tax­pay­ crime is horrendous and ers almost a quarter of a mil­ should never happen in a lion pounds. The Performing civilised society, but until reli­ Rights Society issue licences gion and culture stops being and hand the money over as such a driving force in these royalties to artistes. Police countries, it will continue. A cheifs say it is not unreason­ religious belief can bring con­ able that police on a break at siderable comfort and peace say 3am should be able to to an individual if kept prop­ relax for a while and listen to erly under control. Out of music, but taxpayers groups control, religion can be the say that when budgets are world's worst enemy. And in being cut and police num­ India, it's there in all its hor­ bers axed, these extrava­ gances should be the first to ror.

THE stereotypical go, not the last. I tend to teenager is one who agree. If it's good for workers has not one jot of considera­ in the private sector to go tion for the feelings of others, without music, then it’s good binge drinking and causing for the public sector too. It's mayhem on Friday and amazing how the attitudes of Saturday nights and pre­ money spenders can differ pared to cause vandalism to when it's not their own anything not locked up or money being spent, but that hidden away. But a group of of the public. revellers in the Lincolnshire What a lot of fuss in the town of Boston has turned British press last week­ the stereotype on its head by end over the 5p plastic bag their actions. That’s because charge set to be introduced they were caught on CCTV in supermarkets. Anyone not causing vandalism to a would have thought the gov­ badly damaged cycle rack in ernment was to bring back the town centre, but sorting poll tax rather than introduc­ out a way to repair it. At ing a charge of just 5p on about 3am they set about bags, with the cash going to straightening out a metal charity (and not until 2015!). hook within the rack, after it What's the matter with put­ had been damaged due to a ting bags into the boot of reversing car. The repair job your car and using them was on the council's list of every time you go shopping? things to do but had not been The sensible ones re­use done for several weeks. their bags and get bonus Council staff were amazed points at Sainsbury's and when they watched the Tesco's, but still you see the CCTV footage and want to idiots buying the week's track down the young men shopping and not having a and thank them for their re­usable bag in sight. actions. Imagine how won­ You just can't help the derful it would be if this sort idiots, and it's about time we of thing caught on? You’d gave up trying, and even wake up on a Saturday here in Spain the plastic bag morning, and instead of find­ charge went through 3 years ing even more evidence of ago without any tears with vandalism from the night virtually everybody going before, you’d notice that the down the reusable route!

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24

Friday, September 20, 2013

UP RIBBLE CREEK BUT WITH A PADDLE

by Andrew Atkinson A silver Paddle replica ­ from a Spanish Galleon ­ lies within the corridors of power back in the UK at Preston Town Hall a cen­ tury after being cast! This rarely seen item was on show at this month's Lancashire Heritage Open Day in Preston, in the pres­ ence of the Mayor.

"I am privileged to be able to show off Preston's wonderful historical treasures," said The Mayor of Preston, Veronica Afrin.

The paddle was made in 1913 out of solid silver to reflect Preston's Maritime History and Preston Dock ­ opened in 1892 ­ was Europe's largest single dock basin. The original wooden paddle ­ made from the Spanish Galleon that was shipwrecked in the waters of the River Ribble ­ was acci­ dentally destroyed when thrown onto a fire during the 20th Century. It’s believed that

the Spanish Galleon that was shipwrecked in the River Ribble was linked to The Spanish Armada ­ which sailed from Spain in July 1588. The Armada sailed to the British

Isles in a bid to overthrow protestant England lead by Queen Elizabeth I. Records reveal that a Spanish galleon was stranded off the Fylde Coast, which was sal­ vaged by Cromwell’s troops. The stranded

vessel was amongst a series of famous Shipwreck Treasure Finds ­ with gold and silver bullion ­ found at sea.

For hundreds of years, the Spanish plate fleets carried tons of gold and silver ­ from Potosi and Cartagena ­ into the new world and back to Spain. During sailings, Galleons were shipwrecked ­ with ship­ wreck salvaging taking place over many centuries ­ and still continuing today.

Invaders in the North of England boosted the population with Paleolithic hunters, Neolithic farmers, Celts, Romans, Anglo Saxons, Norwegians, Danes, French and Normans. And archive records state Spanish ­ said to be Spaniards from a ship­ wrecked Galleon.

The silver 'Spanish' paddle is part of the Preston City Council Regalia that also includes a silver gilt mace crafted out of solid silver in 1702.

The best of broadway spectacular Raiders of the pink masks

The Best of Broadway Show held on Thursday 12 September at the fabulous new Med Beach Club, situ­ ated on the Arenales Beach between Gran Alacant and Santa Pola was attended by over 150 people and was a resounding success. The show consisted of some of the most famous songs from Musical Theatre of Broadway, including Phantom of the Opera, Evita, Cats, West Side Story, Grease and Showboat which have delighted audiences throughout the world for over 60 years. The performers all have a wonderful pedigree on the stage and have appeared in front of Presidents, Royalty and a catalogue of rich and famous. The cast included – JONNY MOBI, a world class singer and entertainer who has an extensive stage career including leading roles in many of London top West End Shows as well as appearances on British TV. HANNAH KILMINSTER a veteran of British TV, has appeared on Britain’s Got Talent, as part of the produc­ tion backing singers and has appeared on West End pro­ ductions of Evita, The Spirit of Broadway, Phantom of

the Opera, Cats and may more.

CLEO CAETANO de SOUZA is a Brazilian singer/song writer/actress and performer based in London. After 8 years of successfully maintaining a career in Musical Theatre and Music, Cleo has been part of famous productions such as Mama Mia, The Lion King, Priscilla Queen of the Desert, The Magic Flute and many others.

RACHAEL COWDEN has worked in Musical Theatre and has appeared in many roles in the West End in London including starring in productions of West Side Story, John the Baptist, Godspell and LV in The Rise and Fall of Little Voice, and has become a household name in the world of Jazz and Blues. In a reprisal of her role as LV, Rachael performed her ‘Divas’ show, an imperson­ ation show based on Judy Garland, Marilyn Monroe, Shirley Bassey and Edith Piaf. She has received tremen­ dous reviews and is constantly sought after and soon will perform at several prestigious events across Europe.

The performers put on a fantastic show which was enjoyed by everyone who attended. It was a perfect set­ ting for a special night out!

BRITS HELP YOUNG SPANIARDS

British volunteers are helping young Spaniards in Torrevieja to learn to speak English. The Youth Information Centre(CIAJ) has started a new season of workshop conver­ sations where Spaniards have a chance to brush up on their language skills in a one­to­one situation with native English speakers.

The free sessions have been a major boost to integrating ex­pat British people with Torrevieja residents according to youth councillor, Rosario Martínez Chazarra.

“There is no doubt about the great success of the previous workshops which have helped over 150 people to improve their English speaking skills, as well improving understanding between the British and Spanish communities”, she said

BIRTHDAY ANGELS

Montesinos pilgrimage FLAT FARE RETURN

The annual pilgrimage, or Romeria, in honour of the Virgen del Rosario will take place in Los Montesinos on Sunday September 29th.

The 3 kilometre walk leaves the Virgen del Pilar church in the town at 10.30am heading towards La Marquesa, where mass will be celebrated. Amongst the other attractions planned for the day, there will be a tortilla making contest with prizes being awarded for the tastiest dish as well as the best presentation.

Maria and the Pink Ladies had an absolute ball last week­ end with their latest fund raiser in aid of AECC (Contra el Cancer). Over 120 people donned masks, frocks, and tuxe­ dos for their masked ball at the Campoamor Golf restaurant, raiding everybody’s pockets in aid of a great cause.

The entertaining night raised just under 1500 Euros, and that means the group has now raised over 125,000 Euros in just over 3 years, when Maria was diagnosed her with breast cancer. Since January, the group have arranged for 325 screening tests for both men and women, which are all car­ ried out free of charge, although a small donation is usually made to help fund the free service.

After a late night last Friday, the Pink Ladies were out bright and early the following day at the Filton Centre in Los Balcones at a fun day event organised by Ricky Neil with the help of the staff at The Vibra Gym who aided him in his spon­ sored slim, which raised over 700 Euros, in addition to a fur­ ther 463 Euros on the day at the Centre.

San Fulgencio council has laid on a coach for those peo­ ple who are interested in flat packs and confusing instructions, with a trip to Murcia City’s IKEA store.

The coach will leave the Social Centre on the La Marina Urb at 10.00am this Wednesday (September 25th), head­ ing back home considerably heavier at 4.00pm. The fare is 6 Euros per head and places can be reserved at the Office for the Urbanizaciones.

The Blue Angels are set to roar with their bumper first birthday bash early next month. It’s going to be a week­ end to remember with music for all tastes including punk, rock, and hillbilly, with the entertainment happen­ ing at Casa del Huerfano at Balsicas, Murcia. Entry for the whole weekend of Friday October 4th through to Sunday October 6th will be just 10 Euros, and camping facilities are available. Other attractions will include a custom car and bike show, in addition to other stalls including food and drinks, plus a BBQ. The Angels have spent their first year supporting various local charities, led by the homeless support group, Reach Out, in Torrrevieja.

For more details about the birthday bash, phone Ricky on 669 108 170 or Connah on 693 584 564.

25

Friday, September 20, 2013

TEAM WORK SAVES ANIMALS Five badly treated donkeys have been saved by the Easy Horse Care Rescue Centre in Rojales, after they got a tip off about a house full of mis­ treated animals in Redovan outside Orihuela City. The animal rescue char­ ity APADAC, based at near­by Callosa, had got a tip­off that there was a house full of dogs that were caged in appalling conditions. Some 20 dogs were rescued by local charities, but there were also five donkeys in poor condition that were malnourished.

Once the necessary permission had been obtained, Sue and Rod Weeding from the EHCRC in Rojales swung into action to pick up the donkeys.

“When we got there, most of the

dogs had been taken by volunteers, and we were pleased to see that the Guardia Civil and Policia Local were also there helping in the rescue along with many local people”, said Sue Weeding. “The conditions were dread­ ful, with infestation of the worst kind evident. Some of the donkeys had open sores and it was obvious they had been neglected badly because their hooves were so long they had dif­ ficulty in standing up let alone walking.

We managed to get the worst two into the horsebox and took them back to the rescue centre. When we returned for the other three, the police and APADAC volunteers were still there waiting to help us.”

The donkeys are now safe with the EHCRC team at Rojales, where they are receiving all the necessary atten­ tion and care needed to get them back to full health.

Sue added, “It was fantastic to see all the different agencies working together. It is very encouraging that when local Spanish people find out about the ill treatment of animals, they are now prepared to alert the authori­ ties and not turn a blind eye. The Guardia Civil and Policia Local were very interested to know more about what we do at the EHCRC. I was very impressed with the way they handled the situation and helped us to get these donkeys out to a better life”

LA SIESTA FUN Spangles shine brightly

Torrevieja Stroke Support is holding a fun day a week tomorrow, Saturday September 28th, in the La Siesta area of the city. The event will run between 11.00am and 3.00pm at The Annex at the back of the Age Concern office on Calle Paganini, with all kinds of items for sale as well as refreshments and a chance for you to check your blood pres­ sure free of charge.

The group, which supports people after a stroke as well as their carers, has also received a welcome 250 Euros donation from the Scottish Country Dancing group, courtesy of their founder John Killeen. Torrevieja Stroke Support meets every Friday at 2.45pm at The Annex, and you can get more details by calling Margaret on 965 077 331 or look­ ing up their website, www.torreviejas­ trokesupport.com

The current S p a n i s h Barbershop Champions, the S p a n g l e s L a d i e s ’ H a r m o n y Chorus, were right in tune when they were asked to sing at an English Afternoon Tea Party organised by the Owners’ Club of La Manga. The sun shone, bang on cue, which meant plenty of people coming along and the Spangles were in fine form, with a varied pro­ gramme of up­tempo songs and ballads, from John Lennon’s ‘Imagine’ through to a sunny medley of Beach Boys’ numbers.

Delicious cakes and scones with cream and jam were served as the interval tea. All made and donated by the La Manga Owners’ Club mem­

bers, with the whole event raising 335 Euros for El B u e n Samaritano charity, which provides around 300 meals per day for people who are facing hardship and are unable to support them­ selves.

“We’ve had a fantastic time and are so pleased to have helped raise money for a great local charity” said Spangles Musical Director, Gail Grainger. “We had a warm reception from a very appreciative audience and we sold out of our supply of Spangles ‘Pure Gold’ CDs that we had brought along to the event. We hope that we can come back again to La Manga in the near future.”

ROCKETS LAUNCHED

The Rocket’s Golf Society was back on home base recently with a Stableford individual competition at the Vistabella course at Entre Naranjos.

Merv Wiiliams, pictured in the middle, took the gold category, with Malcolm Anderson(pictured on the right) second, and Liam Folley(picture on the left), third. Arthur Williams was the silver category winner.

It’s the start of the Vega Baja Premier Golf League season today (Friday) at Altorreal Golf, Molinas de Segura with the Rockets playing La Manga North.

The next “away” game for the Rockets is at Alicante Golf this Tuesday (September 24th) for the Ray Battiste Memorial Trophy.

For more information or if you wish to play with the Rockets who pride themselves on their friendliness, phone Ron Nicholson on 678 849 142 or E­mail:­ sanmigron@gmail.com

Enchanting Andalucia Maestra Raquel Pena more than most symbolises the Andalucía flamenco vibrancy of the Costa communities.

Raquel’s vivacious and talented artistes, who have per­ formed for packed audiences throughout the province, perform at the Rebate and the Orihuela Costa Resort restaurants on Sunday September 22 at 3 pm and Tuesday September 22 and 9 pm respectively.

Raquel, who has toured the world and entertained heads of state with the most revered flamenco ensem­ ble is said to put on a show not to be missed. Raquel is pictured between two of her dancers, Daniel Asis and Luciana Ibanez from Argentina. For more details on Raquel’s shows, phone 630 689 431

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Friday, September 20, 2013

UK HEADLINES

SEXUAL PREDATOR JAILED A sexual predator who planned to kidnap, rape, kill and eat children was sentenced on Tuesday to 27 years in jail.

Geoffrey Portway – a British citi­ zen who has spent most of his life in the US – chatted online with other men about his desires, said prose­ cutors in Worcester, Massachusetts.

The 40­year­old’s home contained a dungeon, homemade coffin, butchering kit and other tools in the basement, prosecutors added.

They told the court online chats recovered from Portway’s computer show he solicited people to help kid­ nap a child with the intent of raping, killing and then eating the young­ ster.

Portway pleaded guilty in April to solicitation to commit a crime of vio­ lence as well as possession and dis­ tribution of child pornography.

Prosecutors and Portway’s lawyer, Richard Sweeney, agreed to

a sentencing range of 18 years to a little over 27 years in a plea agree­ ment.

Mr Sweeney argued no one was touched or photographed by Portway.

‘It is important to note, the defen­ dant never engaged in inappropri­ ate sexual conduct with a minor.

There is no evidence that the defendant ever acted out any of his fantasies,’ Mr Sweeney wrote in a sentencing memo.

But prosecutors said Portway appeared to be serious.

‘In the chats, Portway becomes tired of people engaged in role play or fantasy, telling no less than 15 chat partners he is serious about wanting to kill and eat a child,’ sub­ mitted assistant US attorney Stacy Dawson Belf.

Portway was among dozens of people arrested in an international child porn investigation.

Binge-drinkers to be put into drunk tanks

ROWDY binge­drinkers will be held in overnight drunk tanks – and then charged £400 for the privilege.

Police propose forcing drunks who can’t look after them­ selves to spend the night in a privately run holding cell.

They will then be charged for their stay and fined for being drunk and disorderly.

It is hoped this will be an extra deterrent and will both tack­ le alcohol­related problems and keep police costs down.

Northamptonshire Police chief constable Adrian Lee said: “I do not see why the police service or the health service should pick up the duty of care for someone who has chosen to go out and get so drunk that they cannot look after them­ selves.

“So why don’t we take them to a drunk cell owned by a commercial company and get the commercial company to look after them during the night until they are sober.

“When that is over we will issue them with a fixed penalty and the company will be able to charge them for their care, The defendant, who which would be at quite significant cost and that might be a claims he cannot even bite significant deterrent.” into a boiled egg because of The cost is estimated at £300­£400 a night – making it his teeth, said he was more expensive than the Ritz. punched first and held in a Plus, the police can issue an £80 drunk and disorderly fine. headlock before being Last year, David Cameron backed the idea of establishing kicked. drunk tanks.

He told the court: ‘I have Booze­related crime costs the economy around £11 billion only got a couple of teeth in a year including £2.7 billion to the NHS alone. the lower part of my mouth. I can’t even bite into a hard­ boiled egg. I just grabbed into an area. I didn’t realise at the time it was his testi­ cles.’

Mr Henderson, who was The biggest motorbike on earth and a contortionist who taken to hospital where sur­ drinks tea with her feet feature in the new Guinness World geons had to stitch his penis Records book. back, said: ‘My willy was not Also included in the newly released compendium is attached to the rest of my Germany's Julia Plecher, who ran the fastest 100m in high body. I have never experi­ heels ­ 14.531 seconds. enced that kind of pain to And among the more outlandish record­holders is Happie this day and I don’t want to the goat, who achieved the farthest distance skateboarded experience it ever again.’ by a goat after whizzing along for a total of 36 metres.

Toothless man guilty of biting neighbour’s penis

A toothless man has been found guilty of biting his neighbour’s penis ‘like a sandwich’ in an argument over loud music.

Jason Martin, 41, attacked Richard Henderson after he was told to turn his music down at his home in Dover, Kent.

Mr Henderson, 39, told Canterbury crown court that Martin’s bite was so forceful he needed stitches following the attack.

Martin, who only has one or two teeth, denied the charges against him and said: ‘The thought of putting a man’s penis in my mouth.

Well it’s not for me. Not a million years would I do it.’

He confessed to grabbing Mr Henderson’s ‘bits and

bobs’ and said he was only acting in self­defence.

The jury, however, found him guilty of wounding his neighbour with intent to cause serious injury and he is expected to be sentenced next month. When inter­ viewed by police at the time of the attack, he had blood

around his mouth.

The row happened when Martin received a text mes­ sage from Mr Henderson’s partner asking to turn down the music on his Xbox. A fight then broke out after Mr Henderson made a snide remark about Martin’s alleged drug abuse.

GOAT WORLD RECORD

Friday, September 20, 2013

UK HEADLINES

27

PERU DRUGS ACCUSED MAY BE JAILED IN UK Two women charged with drug trafficking in Peru Sky News could return to the UK to serve their sentences if they plead guilty, prosecutors have confirmed.

Melissa Reid, 20, and Michaella McCollum, also 20, were stopped with cocaine worth £1.5m hidden in food packets in their luggage while trying to board a flight to Spain in August.

Reid, from Glasgow, and McCollum, from Dungannon, Co Tyrone, claimed they were forced to carry the 11kg (24lb) of drugs by an armed gang which threatened them and their family members.

Peruvian counter narcotics prosecutor Luis Mendoza suggested both women could plead guilty and qualify for a lighter sentence, which could be served in their home country.

He said: "The British citizens agree to the position of the Public Ministry, if they continue with their strategy they can go to trial.

"However, they are able to qualify for an early termination, in the United Kingdom.

"There is an agreement in our country that those convict­ which means they probably could get a sentence of six to ed can choose an early termination procedure, assuming eight years maximum.

"It's very possible that they may complete their sentence their guilt and paying civil damages and agreeing to the

FREE SCHOOL MEALS FOR INFANT CLASSES

FREE school meals will be offered to all pupils in infant classes, Deputy PM Nick Clegg will announce today.

Almost two million youngsters will get a

“hot, healthy lunch every day”.

But Mr Clegg’s intiative will stop after Year 2 – in which children turn seven – leaving millions of other parents out in the cold.

The move, costing £600million, was the cen­ trepiece of his conference speech to the Lib Dems in Glasgow Wednesday.

“Millions of parents across the country are

feeling the squeeze.

Families spend over £400 on lunch money for each child” Mr Clegg, who visited Lairdsland Primary School in Kirkintilloch, Dunbartonshire, on Tuesday, will say: “Millions of parents across the country are feeling the squeeze.

Families spend over £400 on lunch money for each child.

“I am determined to do all we can to help put money back in the pockets of these families.”

He said four in 10 children live in poverty, but many low­income families will not claim what they are entitled to because of the stigma.

David Cameron’s big announcement is likely to be a tax break for married couples when the Tories meet in two weeks.

judgement, meaning there is no kind of appeal."

Reid's family have said she is prepared to plead guilty to drug smuggling charges to "play the game" and avoid a longer sentence.

Her father, Billy Reid, told ITV that she is negoti­ ating a plea in the hope she will be sentenced to less than seven years in jail, which would allow her to be transferred to the UK to serve her time.

Her mother, Debbie Reid, said she speaks to her daughter every second day over the phone for 10 minutes.

"We still believe she was coerced into it, but obvi­ ously now we realise she needs to plead guilty, just to get her home basically," she said.

Mr Reid said the plan is to work with the Foreign Office and other agencies to fast­track his daugh­ ter's return to the UK. Reid and McCollum are being held in the notori­ ous Virgen de Fatima prison in the Peruvian capital Lima.

They have reportedly told the Peruvian authorities they were working in Ibiza and did not meet before they were both kidnapped at gunpoint and forced to travel to Majorca.

Crocodile hides under bed for EIGHT hours

A safari lodge boss spent a real­life night on the rep­ tiles ... after this eight foot croc crept under his bed.

The clever beast spent more than eight hours lying quietly, just inches beneath dozing Guy Whittall.

Next morning Guy, 40, sat on the bed organising his day, unaware the crocodile lay beside his dangling

feet.

He left and was only alert­ ed to his odd room­mate by a maid’s screams.

The croc was pulled out of Humani Lodge, Zimbabwe, and set free.

The ex­Test cricketer said later: “Crocs know how to keep quiet.

"I’m sure everyone in Humani checks under their beds now.”

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Friday, September 20, 2013

SPANISH NEWS

CATALANS DEFIANT Catalonia is vowing to press ahead with plans to stage an independence vote, despite the Spanish Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy saying no to a request to allow the wealthy region to vote on its political future.

Rajoy told the head of Catalonia's regional govern­ ment, Artur Mas, that "the ties that bind us cannot be undone without huge economic, political and social costs" in a letter released on Saturday. "And, of course, I also want to pass on my government's strong conviction that we need to work together to strengthen these ties and move away from confrontation," he added.

The letter was released just three days after hun­ dreds of thousands of Catalans massed in a vast human chain stretching hundreds of kilometres along the Mediterranean coast to demand independence from Spain on Catalonia's national day.

It was a reply to a letter sent by Mas to Rajoy in July requesting the "consultation of the Catalan people, as soon as possible" on its political future. Mas, who avoids using the

word "independence", wants a referendum next year but has said that if Spain blocks that, the next regional election in 2016 could serve as a plebiscite on self­determination instead.

The government of Catalonia welcomed Rajoy's offer for dialogue but said Mas was hoping for a "reply in the style of

(David) Cameron" in a reference to Britain's decision to allow a referendum on Scottish independence to take place next year.

"We will take this commitment and will explore it but we will not be naive nor will we accept that as a conse­ quence of talks this process undergo unnecessary delays," the spokesman for the government of Catalonia, Francesc Homs, said on Sunday. "The cal­ endar for the consultation remains unchanged and there is room for dialogue."

Rajoy's government has insisted that a referendum in Catalonia, which is home to around 7.5 million peo­ ple, on a break from Spain would be unacceptable on constitutional grounds. Rajoy's letter did not spell out what issues should be part of talks. Mas has sought a new agreement on tax redistribution which would allow Catalonia to keep more of the money its residents and firms pay in taxes.

One in two Catalans, 49%, back independence while 36 % opposed, according to a poll published in the El Pais newspaper earlier this month.

YOU DIRTY RAT CRISTINA’S WOES

A man’s been fined 900 Euros for putting a dead rat in his local town hall as part of a protest. Roberto Villar delivered the rodent to the town hall of La Manjoya in the Asturias region in March to protest against a rat plague at a farm near his house. The dead animal was presented — in a plastic bag — to the local hygiene offi­ cial.

"I did it so they would pay attention to me, and in the sense it worked because they cleaned up the farm," Villar told local daily La Nueva España.

"Now the rat has cost me dearly," said the man, refer­ ring to the heavy fine he received for his protest.

According to the town hall, Villar broke local hygiene by­ laws with his gift of what they described as "a rat of significant dimension, between 25 and 30 centime­ tres long". Now Villar will have to cough up 900 Euros

CONTINUE

plus an extra 30 Euros for costs relating to the removal of the rat. But Villar is with­ out remorse.

"I would do it all over

again," he told La Nueva España. He also has no plans to pay the fine, saying he doesn't have "that much money".

The daughter of Spain's King Juan Carlos is in hot water again after it emerged she falsely claimed tax deductions on personal costs including the rental of her Barcelona mansion and the expenses of one of her children's birthday par­ ties.

The fresh controversy adds to what has been a difficult time for Princess Cristina, and she and her husband Iñaki Urdangarin are facing allegations that they embezzled 6 million Euros from non­profit sports institute Noos.

Until now, judges have spared the King's youngest daughter from being called into court to be questioned in that case. But with new fiscal data emerging, it seems the King’s daughter will finally have to face a grilling about her finances.

The latest evidence, reported by online Spanish daily El Confidencial, points to Cristina's attempts to "cheat" Spanish tax

authorities out of fiscal deductions which did­ n't correspond to the couple's other compa­ ny, business consul­ tancy firm Aizoon.

These include the astronomical rental costs of their upmarket Pedralbes palazzo in Catalonia (7656 Euros a month), the money spent on a birthday party for one of the couple’s children and a business coaching course which Cristina undertook.

Judge Castro, who has been leading the investigation into the princess's involvement in the Noos and Aizoon cases, is likely to include the fiscal documents as new evi­ dence of Cristina's involvement in her hus­ band’s illicit business dealings. Another doc­ ument leaked to the press on September 3rd shows the King's daughter's signature on an official Aizoon affidavit, proving even further that she was aware of Urdangarin 6 million Euros embezzlement scam.

Friday, September 20, 2013

SPANISH NEWS

29

SHEPHERD BUNKERS GOLF COURSES An illiterate shepherd has stopped a giant building proj­ ect from going ahead after a ten­year­long legal battle to protect his land. Sixty­year­ old Pascual Carrión will finally be able to live in peace after Jumilla Town Hall in Murcia closed the appeal window for a building project which, if approved, would have cost him his 30­hectares of land.

"I've not won anything, apart from peace of mind," Carrión told the El Confidencial newspaper. I'm left with my land and the heart problems that have arisen from all the stress.”

Carrión first became aware of the plans to build a 15,000 home residential complex around two brand­new golf courses when the electricity company Iberdrola inexplicably put up a high­tension power line through his land in 2002. "I knew there was something going on behind the scenes even then," he told El Confidencial.

The elderly shepherd’s complaints about the five high­ voltage towers erected on his property fell on deaf ears.

Iberdrola, which had the support of Francisco Abellan ­ Jumilla's socialist mayor at the time – had actually diverted the electricity line so that it wouldn't pass through the planned golf courses. Soon building contractors for the

Santa Ana del Monte Jumilla­Golf complex were offering Carrión 2.6 million Euros for his land. Iberdrola also tried to buy the farmer's silence by offering him 30,000 Euros to turn a blind eye to the high tension towers. The shepherd was having none of it though, having already witnessed how his neighbours were waiting in vain for the millions they were owed for the properties they'd sold.

He turned instead to the courts, spending more than 30,000 Euros of his own money to take the matter before a judge with the official technical reports at hand. Murcia's High Court ruled against Carrión, alleging that San José

Inversiones' giant building project should prevail because the town’s general interests mattered more than his as an individual. Carrión then took the case to Murcia's Supreme Court in 2010. This time the judge ruled in favour of his argu­ ment that there wasn't enough water in Jumilla to supply an extra 20,000 peo­ ple.

"I don't even give my herd any water from the local well because it’s so saline," Carrión told El Confidencial.

In the three years since that hearing, the developer has gone into pre­bankruptcy proceedings. The 60­year­ old shepherd has witnessed how 800 people — mainly English expats, locals say — have been left waiting to find out whether their down pay­ ments in the stalled project would be repaid.

"It's embarrassing to see what’s happened to all these for­ eigners and how they are accusing Spaniards of being shameless when most of us are honest," Carrión argues. He at least feels satisfied with how his ten­year­long legal battle has turned out.

"I'll die at peace having fought for what’s mine and the truth. I've never studied, I can't read or write, but no one will fool me."

CONTROLLERS HIT WRONG NOTE A farewell song for a retiring airline pilot has landed five Spanish air traffic controllers in trouble.

Last month, Francisco Ubet called time on his 34­ year career and to honour the occasion, air traffic controllers at Madrid's Barajas airport transmitted a farewell message.

Accompanied by a

guitar, and singing to the tune of Auld Lang Syne, the controllers sang a tuneful tribute for 35 seconds for him. To cap the celebrations off, when the plane landed, firemen at Madrid's airport performed a 'water arch' in the pilot's honour.

But the Spanish Airports and Air Navigation Association (AENA) were far from impressed by the cele­ brations. The air traffic con­ trollers' human resources

department said the con­ trollers had broken the rules by broadcasting the mes­ sage using the air traffic control radio frequency, and now they are facing discipli­ nary action.

But the group have hit back hard against their bosses. "Nobody in their right mind could think a con­ troller, or a group of con­ trollers, including the shift supervisor, would put the security of passengers at

risk," one employee told Spain's ABC newspaper.

"This (what we did) has always been a universally accepted custom in the avi­ ation world because pilots and air traffic controllers have a very close relation­ ship."

Spain's air traffic con­ trollers have now started a campaign to see the punish­ ment of the five controllers dropped. As part of this, Spain's Air Traffic Controllers union is asking pilots to send a brief radio message of support on their approach to Madrid airport.

30

Friday, September 20, 2013

The high life at less than you think!

Hotel La Laguna Spa & Golf 4****Superior, in Doña Pepa , Quesada. A special place to enjoy in the Vega Baja area, and you don’t have to stay there to enjoy the facilities.

You can enjoy a wonderful Restaurant with a daily set menu, with many different dishes to choose (with a drink included.) You can also go "A la Carte", with typical local cui­ sine along with international favourites. The price of the daily menu is: 16 Euros on weekdays, and 21 Euros on Saturday and Sunday.

The hotel also has a beautiful Cafeteria overlooking the gardens(with two olive trees, that are about 2000 years old)

and an outdoor terrace with comfortable sofas where you can enjoy a coffee, a “tapa”, different dishes, sandwiches, or any drink while you relax.

And Hotel La Laguna has the ultimate in relaxation with the Spa, featuring a large variety of treatments for both the ladies and the gentlemen! You can enjoy the unique and beautiful salt water Jacuzzi situated under a waterfall, which will cer­ tainly give a visual experience not to forget. If you live in the area, then are special offers so that you can enjoy La Laguna Spa at some very special rates, and for a lot less than you think!

The hotel also offers the La Laguna Hairdresser service which you can use all year round from 10.00am through to 8.00pm. And if you’re looking for a perfect venue for a wed­ ding reception, party, or business meeting, then you should check out the luxurious and bright Event Rooms, which can be adapted for the use that you want, helping to bring all the charm of the Mediterranean close to you!

Hotel La Laguna Spa & Golf 4****Superior. To enjoy life!

For more information phone us at: 965 725 577 reservas@hotellalaguna.com www.hotellalaguna.com We speak English!

Friday, September 20, 2013

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Friday, September 20, 2013

Horrorscopes Aries March 21 ­ April 19 You will attempt to serenade a loved one in the style of Frank Sinatra in his Rat Pack years this week. Ensure you learn all the words to either I get a kick out of you, The lady is a tramp and whatever they call that song that starts The pig goes oink, the cow goes moo and the bell goes ding­a­ ling.

Taurus April 20 ­ May 20 You once saw an afternoon TV movie in which a man was suddenly forgotten by everyone, including his dog.

This is basically the blue print for your coming week, although on the positive side there is little risk of international espi­ onage.

Gemini May 21 ­ June 20 Whilst inflating a balloon this week you will suddenly remember something important and run from the room, forgetting that the balloon is still in your mouth. It's such a shame that car air bags have already been invented or you could have made a fortune from your forthcoming discovery.

Cancer June 21 ­ July 22 On hearing an Elton John song on a radio station you will decide to buy one of his albums, but you will buy the wrong one ­ Saturn is fond of his early work on the Yellow Brick Road album, however Mercury and it's moons favor his Greatest Hits. Their indecision will confuse you in a record store and an assistant will not be able to help, other than by offering you a seat.

By Pandora Leo July 23 ­ August 22 You enjoy wearing boxer shorts or, even, nothing at all under your work suit, for that almost 1960's level of freedom­feeling downunder. It is important to double, triple, even quadruple check that your zipper is closed throughout the week Avoid older dark suits as those zippers are to come under the direct influence of Mercury and have a 56% chance of breaking.

Virgo August 23 ­ September 22 A dwarf­like­human wearing a Star Wars Storm Trooper uniform will break two win­ dows in your house on Wednesday ­ Your misguided threats of Jar Jar Binks will bring mirth to a young child's eyes. Take an umbrella with you at all times to cover your embarrassment.

Libra September 23 ­ October 22 Your general disability with electrical equip­ ment is set to continue. Avoid using the microwave after Thursday and until further notice; we are unable to see in the charts why as we spilt coffee over the important ziggy­lined bit. A box of chocolates you give to an elderly Italian aunt will have a nut in which will cause her to choke expressively, with a red face, for over fifty minutes.

Scorpio October 23 ­ November 21 Whilst playing Trivial Pursuit for money after 16th, due to a fluke conjunction, your luck at this game will turn full circle. Members of your trusted Trivial Pursuit circle will accuse you of hustling as your performance will be nothing short of miraculous, especially on culture questions. Steadfastly refuse to reimburse them any money unless they are under 10 years of age.

Sagittarius November 22 ­ December 21 The months of training for your boy band performance at the company party will pay off handsomely this week. Whilst a talent scout will (accidentally) see your perform­ ance, he will not deem it sufficient for any recording deals, although the office assis­ tant who videoed it will make a fortune from you’ve been framed when your boss attempts to dance like John Travolta.

Capricorn December 22 ­ January 19 some kind of thing will happen on Fridaybut it isn't very clear in your charts.

Something that is probably a reddish orange. Medium in size. North facing.

Hmmm. That's the best we can do, this star reading has really pooped us out this week, lets hope we aren't going down with an illness.

Aquarius January 20 ­ February 18 On taking a bath around Monday a spider will land on your midriff and make its way, toyingly, to your neck using the styling of a James Bond movie. Time Magazine will phone you on the weekend asking for your permission to be put into their draw for reader of the year. Accept this offer and then cancel your subscription.

Pisces February 19 ­ March 20 In a freakish superheroes­in­animals type incident Tuesday, your yappy type dog will start jumping from the ground to bite your low hanging dangly bits around the house.

To avoid this, either place weights on his little feet to prevent him from getting to the required height, or fix a large hat to his head so he can't look up.

Friday, September 20, 2013

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Friday, September 20, 2013

Zenos Cars - Britain's newest sports car company A new British sports car company, Zenos Cars has been announced, co­founded by Ansar Ali and Mark Edwards who previously were CEO and COO respectively of Caterham Cars.

Named after the noun 'Zen', (A state of enlightenment that focuses togetherness of body and mind) the Norfolk based company says it is 'committed to delivering thrilling and engaging sports car experiences for enthusiasts' and prom­ ises ultra­lightweight and razor sharp handling sports cars.

The company says it is to deliver 'the most progressive and desirable lightweight sports car company, driven by experiences that will create, engage and excite an enviable club of Zenos owners.' With 30 years of collective experi­ ence in the auto sector, the founders have assembled a net­ work of world class technical partners to develop a range of Zenos products 'with affordability ­ purchase and serviceabil­ ity costs ­ firmly in mind'.

They intend to engage and involve like no other sports car business and thus be more in tune with the driving enthusi­ ast including working with members of the public as part of the development programme, asking for direct feedback full of pitfalls and minefields ­ 'as the company is prepared to

take the rough with the smooth'.

Zenos Cars has been awarded a government grant to support the development of its innovative hybrid chassis platform concept, with the first of 3 products in the Zenos portfolio ­ coded Project E10 ­ currently in development and due for public launch early 2014. The E10 is a road legal track focused 'step­in' two seater with Elise type proportions.

It features a hybrid carbon/aluminium monocoque, alu­ minium sub­frames with steel roll hoop and self­coloured removable front and rear wings. It will be powered by A 200hp mid­mounted transverse naturally aspirated 2.0­litre Ford GDI engine driving the rear wheels, with an estimated top speed of 135 mph and a 0­60mph time of 4.5 seconds.

Optional extras include 6 speed transmission, limited slip dif­ ferential, race/track harness, heater, carbon seats, carbon leather trim a track pack and wheel upgrades to name just a few.

A low vehicle mass is achieved thanks to the integration of a single 'backbone' aluminium extrusion with a carbon com­ posite tub delivering 'significant torsional rigidity'. By utilising recycled carbon fibre with a thermoplastic core the Zenos platform delivers 'world class mechanical efficiency without

the production and replacement costs normally associated with carbon­based supercars'.

The final design of Project E10 remains under wraps but will be unveiled later this year. Project E11 is expected in 2016 with the hard top project E12 in 2018. Prices and addi­ tional details will be announced nearer the launch.

Friday, September 20, 2013

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Friday, September 20, 2013

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 12 represents Z and 11 represents D, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across

Down

1 Frightened (6) 4 Cower in fear (6) 9 Military toilet (7) 10 Teacher (5) 11 Female horse (4) 12 Everyday (8) 13 Articulate (3) 14 Choose (5) 16 Marsh plant (5) 17 Motor vehicle (3) 19 Small house (8) 20 Flexible containers (4) 23 Go up (5) 24 Law (7) 25 Small lump of precious metal (6) 26 Surfeit (6)

1 Serious (6) 2 Change (5) 3 Wicked (4) 5 Salesman (8) 6 Nought (7) 7 Mistake (5) 8 Rot (5) 12 Plump (3) 13 Clamber (8) 15 Touchdown (7) 16 Cutting tool (3) 17 Thicket (5) 18 Evaluate (6) 19 Cured pig meat (5) 21 Severe (5) 22 Tailless breed of cat (4)

Last weeks Solution

Across: 1 Bill, 4 Pillar, 9 Abstain, 10 Shake, 11 Obeys, 12 Survive, 13 Satiny, 15 Scream, 19 Furious, 21 Messy, 23 React, 24 Examine, 25 Joined, 26 Deed.

Down: 2 Issue, 3 Liaison, 4 Punish, 5 Loser, 6 Avarice, 7 Famous, 8 Fete, 14 Tornado, 16 Command, 17 Mayhem, 18 Ascend, 19 Firm, 20 Often, 22 Slime.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross­Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 There is some witty repartee as Bob leaves the fencing game (8) 5 Almost grasped the snake (3) 8 Ross leaves incorrect square roots and forms a great circle (7) 9 A halo used as a greeting (5) 10 Secure available link (3­ 2) 11 Mr Defoe wrote about emancipation (7) 12 Small boat looking dingy round opening of harbour (6) 14 No! I’d go out with a Roman Catholic ­ a Scandinavian one (6) 17 Flexible, responsible party leader comes first (7) 18 Apostle reveals parsi­ moniousness (5) 20 Honourable tie formed with church (5) 21 Repaired cool van on a fiery mountain (7)

22 Finish off Arthurian leg­ end (3) 23 "A donkey, your Majesty!" Ted declared (8) Down 1 Seized from desert women (7) 2 Rogue changed my makeup (5) 3 Postman pillion passen­ ger gets a sign of approval (3,2,3,4) 4 Present day dispute is like a boat without a rudder (6) 5 Snubbed a vacant jour­ nalist (7) 6 Song performed by little Sally in the afternoon (5) 7 Nice girl? (12) 13 Cried like a horse, heeding freak (7) 15 Agreement in New Hampshire (7) 16 Skips pages (6) 17 Sound of harmony in musical composition (5) 19 Intended to be heard at the closing of Parliament (5)

STANDARD CLUES Down Across 1 Seized by force (7) 1 Witty repartee (8) 2 Cosmetic powder (5) 5 Venomous snake (3) 3 Expression of approval 8 Imaginary line around the (3,2,3,4) Earth (7) 4 At sea (6) 9 Hawaiian greeting (5) 5 Dodged (7) 10 Connection (3­2) 6 Religious song (5) 11 Liberty (7) 12 Small, open boat (6) 7 Young French woman 14 From Scandinavia (6) (12) 17 Easily bent (7) 13 Whinnied like a horse (7) 18 Zealous Apostle (5) 15 Agreement (7) 20 Moral principle (5) 16 Departs (6) 21 Erupting mountain (7) 17 Fragment (5) 22 Finale (3) 19 Intended (5) 23 Declared (8) Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Oral, 4 Datum, 9 Acton, 10 Lorelei, 11 Scrooge, 12 Flash, 13 Resist, 15 Isobar, 18 Yodel, 20 Aspired, 23 Liberal, 24 Aloof, 25 Trout, 26 Oven.

Down: 2 Retorts, 3 Lento, 4 Delves, 5 Tariffs, 6 Malta, 7 Lass, 8 Cipher, 13 Royals, 14 Salerno, 16 Bar none, 17 Ballet, 19 Debut, 21 Piano, 22 Daft.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

2 letter words By Hi 3 letter words Ark Lee Mat Red Ted Tot Use Van 4 letter words Able Acne Aery

Alee Alit Aloe Arty Bawl Boar Cola Cult Dyne Erie Gasp Knee Lint Oboe Onto Peps Rare Rein Rest Rota

Sale Salt Scot Self Semi Silt Sold Tear Tone 5 letter words Cards Cocoa Cooly Count Crimp Emote Fated Forte

Halve Infer Koala Llama Maned Perky Poesy Polar Rants Ruler Sales Sally Salon Satay Scrub Skate Solve Start Tilde Tutor

6 letter words Garner Mantis Scrams Silent Silver Spoils Strike Tailor 8 letter words Easterly Sundress 9 letter words Velveteen Woodlouse

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD

Improve your Spanish ­ clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Agosto (6) 4 Salsas (6) 9 Almirante (7) 10 Derramar (líquido) (5) 11 Key (door) (5) 12 German (f) (7) 13 Three hundred (11) 18 Boil (swelling) (7) 20 Dose (of medicine) (5) 22 Western (side, part) (5) 23 Desnudar (7) 24 Spit (roast) (6) 25 Goma de borrar (6)

Down 1 Kind (nice) (6) 2 Prawn (5) 3 Calles (7) 5 Nave (de iglesia) (5) 6 Watch out! (7) 7 Chairs (6) 8 Apricot (11) 14 Magazine (journal) (7) 15 Swimmer (7) 16 Language (6) 17 Adviser (6) 19 January (5) 21 Semillas (5)

37

Friday, September 20, 2013 Across 1 Which adjective means ‘lying face upwards’? (6) 4 What name was given to the1980s policy of the Soviet Union under leader Mikhail Gorbachev to allow more government transparency?

(8) 9 What name is given to a place where bees are kept or a collection of beehives?

(6) 10 Which small, slender par­ rot has a predominantly green plumage and a long tail? (8) 12 Which city in northern Pakistan at the eastern end of the Khyber Pass is the capital of North­West Frontier Province? (8) 13 What was the surname of the American inventor whose inventions include automatic telegraph sys­ tems, the carbon micro­ phone for telephones, the phonograph and the carbon filament lamp? (6) 15 Which wild cat with yel­ lowish­brown fur, a short tail, and tufted ears, is found chiefly in the northern lati­ tudes of North America and Eurasia? (4) 16 What name is usually given to the distinctive heraldic bearings or shield of

a person, family, corporation or country? (4,2,4) 19 Which instrument is used for measuring and recording the speed of the wind? (10) 20 Which Roman poet is particularly known for his elegiac love poems such as the Amores and the Ars Amatoria and for the Metamorphoses, a hexamet­ ric epic that retells Greek and Roman myths? (4) 23 Which slender, straight, sharply pointed sword (dou­ ble­edged, single­edged or edgeless) is used for thrust­ ing? (6) 25 What name is given to a thin flat piece of plastic, tor­ toiseshell or other slightly flexible material that is held by or worn on the fingers and used to pluck the strings of a musical instrument such as a guitar? (8) 27 Which large city, the cap­ ital of Belgium, is the seat of the North Atlantic Treaty Organisation? (8) 28 According to the Old Testament of The Bible, what was the name of the youth who was taken into the court of Nebuchadnezzar and given divine protection when thrown into a den of lions?

(6)

SUDOKU (Very Easy)

Quiz Word

29 What name is often given to the feet of pigs, especially ones used as food? (8) 30 What name is given to the central supporting pillars of spiral or winding staircas­

es? (6) Down 1 The name of which knife with a small, sharp, some­ times detachable blade, as

used by a surgeon, is derived from the Latin for ‘to scratch’? (7) 2 Meaning ‘powerful’ in French, what is the name of the high­jump competition in the equestrian sport of show jumping? (9) 3 Oslo is the capital of which mountainous European country on the northern and western coast­ line of Scandinavia? (6) 5 What was the surname of the 19th century English artist, illustrator, author and poet who is best known for his literary nonsense in poet­ ry and prose and especially his limericks? (4) 6 The name of which posi­ tion in rugby can also mean a deadlock between two equally matched opponents in a dispute or conflict? (8) 7 What was the surname of the American athlete, who, in 1935 equalled or broke six world records in 45 minutes, and in 1936 won four gold medals at the Olympic Games in Berlin? (5) 8 Which bacterial disease is marked by rigidity and spasms of the voluntary muscles? (7) 11 Which sword­like stab­ bing blade can be fixed to the muzzle of a rifle for use

in hand­to­hand fighting? (7) 14 Desdemona is the wife of which famous Shakespeare character? (7) 17 Opened in 1995, the home ground of Middlesbrough F C is known as the [What] Stadium? (9) 18 Sir Viv Richards and Sir Ian Botham, both played cricket for which English county between 1974 and 1986? (8) 19 What name is often given to an entertainer who per­ forms spectacular gymnastic feats? (7) 21 ‘I love the way you walk. I love the way you walk’ are the first lines of which song written and recorded by blues singer­songwriter John Lee Hooker in 1956?

(7) 22 Which animated film series franchise, first released in 2002, shares its name with the series of gla­ cial episodes during the Pleistocene period? (3,3) 24 Which small planetary body orbiting the Sun, was discovered in 1930 by Clyde Tombaugh? (5) 26 Musicians Damon Albarn, Graham Coxon, Alex James and Dave Rowntree formed which alternative rock band in London in 1988? (4)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH

EN CASA ­AT HOME Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch.

(Answers below)

el balcón

la cama

el cajón

la cortina

el cuarto

la lámpara

el espejo

la llave

el fregadero

la maceta

el grifo

la pared

el jardín

la plancha

el lavabo

la sabana

el mueble

la ventana

music QUIZ

ANSEWRS: 1. Meatloaf (Bat Out Of Hell and Bat Out Of Hell 2) 2.

Dueted With Their Daughters 3. Rolf Harris 4. FALSE 5.

The Colourfield 6. Antonio Banderas 7. Sideshow 8.

Perfect Day 9. Lionel Ritchie & Diana Ross

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Word Solution Across: 1 Lactic, 5 Carapace, 9 Lifebelt, 10 Corona, 11 Whitehorse, 12 Hook, 13 Hangover, 16 Shekel, 17 Ostler, 19 Chrétien, 21 Vine, 22 Sutherland, 25 Haredi, 26 Aperitif, 27 Genetics, 28 Schism.

Down: 2 Amish, 3 Trent, 4 Chekhov, 5 Caterer, 6 Rickets, 7 Parchment, 8 Congolese, 14 Aestivate, 15 Goldeneye, 18 Rossini, 19 Cutlass, 20 Reefers, 23 Leigh, 24 Nails

la bañera Empareja estas palabras ­ Match the Spanish and English words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz.

1.el balcón, 2.el cajón,

17.la plancha, 18.la sabana,

l.the draw, m.the bath, n.the key,

3.el cuarto, 4.el espejo,

19.la ventana.

o.the bed, p.the furniture, q.the tap, r.the wash basin,

5.el fregadero, 6.el grifo, 7.el jardín, 8.el lavabo,

a.the window, b.the lamp,

9.el mueble, 10.la bañera,

c.the room, d.the sink,

11.la cama, 12.la cortina,

e.the plant pot, f.the curtain,

13.la lámpara, 14.la llave,

g.the mirror, h.the balcony,

15.la maceta, 16.la pared,

i.the wall, j.the sheet, k.the iron,

Soduko

Span ­ Eng

Quizword

s.the garden.

Answers: 1h, 2l, 3c, 4g, 5d, 6q, 7s, 8r, 9p, 10m, 11o, 12f, 13b, 14n, 15e, 16i, 17k, 18j, 19a.

1. Who Has Both The Top Two Best Selling Heavy Metal Albums Of All Time In The UK? 2. What Connects UK Number One Singles For Ozzy Osbourne And Frank Sinatra In 2003 And 1967 Respectively?

3. 1970's Super Group Led Zeppelin Recorded 'Stairway To Heaven'' But Who Had An Unexpected Hit With In During The 1990's?

4. True Or False Gary Numan Used To Be A Member Of Kraftwerk?

5. Terry Hall Of Fun Boy Three Later Formed A New Band Was It Called The Colourbox Or The Colourfield?

6. Who Played Che Guevara In The Film Version Of Evita?

7. What Was Jamaican Singer Barry Biggs Highest Entry Making No.3 In 1976?

8. Which Charity Single Was A UK Number One Hit For 'Various Artists' In 1997?

9. Which Soul Pairing Duetted On 'Endless Love' In 1981?

Fill It In

38

Friday, September 20, 2013

TRELI ON THE TELLY PEAKY’S A BLINDER

Murphy and Sam Neill going in for something like this unless they were impressed by the whole concept includ­ ing the script. Murphy’s char­ Peaky Blinders has set the acter of Thomas is the fixer bar so high for new of the Shelby clan, but even autumn drama that I doubt in 1919 we have a dominant very much whether any­ family figure in the form of thing can top this highly Aunt Polly, played by Helen entertaining offering on McCrory. She gives a sizzling BBC2. performance, and I’ve never The omens were good for seen Sam Neill in a nastier the story of a family gangster role playing a no nonsense gang calling the shots in post copper that would make ­ World War One somebody like Jack Regan in Birmingham. You don’t get The Sweeney look a pussy­ quality actors like Cillian cat.

with ALEX TRELINSKI

Because it is only a six part series, larger than life char­ acters and a brisk moving plot has allowed us to get under the skin of what every­ thing’s about very very quick­ ly, but stupidly this has been labelled as some kind of UK answer to the US show, Boardwalk Empire (which returns next month on SKY).

They are both very different animals, with zillions of dol­ lars thrown at Boardwalk and double the episodes allowing it to smoulder gently: ­ at times a bit too slowly for some critics, but not for me I

hasten to add. Full marks as well for Peaky Blinders creat­ ing a dark atmospheric Birmingham (mainly shot in Liverpool!), and there’ve never been so many Brummie accents on UK TV since the creaky days of vin­ tage Crossroads! Perhaps I’ve not been watching at the right times, but has the BBC promotion for this gem been a bit too low key? I’ll also beat the BBC PR machine to the punch by telling you that series two of Peaky Blinders is already being planned. As they used to say on the old Points of View, well done BBC! Across the pond, a show that has got criti­ cal acclaim is Bates Motel, which is being screened on the Universal Channel. It’s a modern day prequel to the classic Psycho movie, and looks at the relationship between a teenage Norman Bates, as portrayed by Brit actor, Freddie Highmore, and his mother Norma, played by Vera Farmiga. This is very

q

good fare indeed and not surprisingly is graphic, but the two leads deliver in believability and you are waiting to see how Norman changes as the first two episodes have him as a nice guy. Just don’t go for a show­ er!

vately delighted as Simon Cowell’s availability for their version will be guaranteed next autumn when Gary Barlow and Louis Walsh stand down.

q

Downton Abbey returns this Sunday night to ITV. Word is that season four is a Whilst the re­vitalised cracker, and it needs to be UK X Factor goes from after a boring Xmas special strength to strength, the US which only perked up in the version, which starts tonight last few minutes as Matthew on ITV2, is tanking with the met his maker, courtesy of a viewers in season three. I bet contractual car crash exit for that ITV executives ware pri­ actor Dan Stevens.

q

The Courier Friday TV

September 20

00:35 01:20 01:25 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 22:30 23:00 23:25 23:35

This Week Holiday Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer Street Patrol UK Claimed and Shamed Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Wanted Down Under Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News BBC London News The One Show Ronnie's Animal Crackers EastEnders Miranda Big School Mrs Brown's Boys BBC News Regional News and Weather Would I Lie to You?

00:20 Science Britannica 01:20 Panorama 01:50 Swansea City: The Fall and Rise 02:30 What Remains 03:30 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Adapting Carmen: Re­imagin­ ing a Classic

05:30 Schools ­ Children at Work: Bollywood 05:55 Schools 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Street Patrol UK 08:45 Claimed and Shamed 09:15 Fake Britain 10:00 Flog It! Trade Secrets 11:00 Question Time 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 Sailing 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Oceans 16:45 Elephant Diaries 17:15 Incredible Animal Journeys 18:15 Cash in the Attic 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 James Martin's Food Map of Britain 20:00 Hairy Bikers' Best of British 21:00 Mastermind 21:30 Gardeners' World 22:00 David Attenborough's Rise of Animals: Triumph of the Vertebrates 23:00 QI 23:30 Newsnight

01:20 Jackpot247 04:00 Tonight 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Storage Hoarders 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Gino's Italian Escape 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Piers Morgan's Life Stories 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:35 Miami Vice

PIERS MORGAN The former tabloid editor interviews more celebri­ ties about their careers and personal lives. Actress Julie Goodyear, best­known for playing the role of pub landlady Bet Lynch in Coronation Street, opens up about her four marriages, a stint in a psychiatric hospital and her ill­fated return to the Street. She also talks candidly about the relation­ ships she has had with women, and the ups and downs of life with her current husband Scott Brand, a man 27 years her junior.

00:05 The Fried Chicken Shop 01:05 Posh Pawn 02:05 Random Acts 02:10 Benefits Britain 1949 03:05 Hitler's Rise: The Colour Films 04:00 SuperScrimpers 04:55 Deal or No Deal 05:50 Countdown 06:35 Kirstie's Handmade Treasures 06:55 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 07:20 The Hoobs 07:45 The Hoobs 08:10 According to Jim 08:35 Will & Grace 09:00 Frasier 09:30 Frasier 10:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:00 The Big Bang Theory 11:30 The Big Bang Theory 12:00 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Jamie's 15 Minute Meals 13:40 McLintock!

16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 80s: Celebrity Fifteen to One 22:00 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 23:00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man

00:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 00:55 Inside Hollywood 01:00 SuperCasino 04:55 Divine Designs 05:20 Great Artists 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Police Interceptors 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Mentalist 16:15 The Staircase Murders 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 World's Strongest Man 21:00 Monster Moves 22:00 Celebrity Super Spa 23:00 Hens Behaving Badly

39

The Courier Saturday TV

September 21

Merchant of Venice 03:10 Question Time 00:05 John Bishop's Britain 00:40 She's out of My League 02:20 Weatherview

04:10 This Is BBC Two 07:00 This Is BBC Two 08:25 The Lost Squadron

02:25 BBC News

09:40 Yellowstone Kelly

07:00 Breakfast

11:10 Reel History of Britain

11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30 Home Cooking Made Easy 13:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather

11:40 The Private Life of Plants 12:30 University Challenge 13:00 The A to Z of TV Cooking 13:45 Coast

13:15 Football Focus

13:50 EastEnders

13:50 Match of the Day Live 16:00 Inspire: The Olympic Journey

15:45 The House That £100K Built 16:45 Urban Jungle 17:15 Flog It!

16:30 Final Score

18:00 The Wonder of Dogs

18:15 Formula 1

19:00 Dragons' Den

19:30 BBC News; Regional News and Weather

20:00 Dad's Army 20:30 Count Arthur Strong

19:45 I Love My Country 20:30 When Miranda Met Bruce 21:40 The National Lottery Saturday Night Draws

21:00 The Making of Merkel with Andrew Marr 22:00 Mock the Week 22:30 The Awakening

21:50 Casualty

23:10 BBC News; Weather 23:30 Match of the Day

00:00 Weather 00:05 Later with Jools Holland

00:05 Rewind the Tube 01:10 Random Acts 01:15 Crossing Over 03:10 The Ricky Gervais Show 03:40 St Elsewhere 04:30 SuperScrimpers 05:25 Deal or No Deal 06:20 SuperScrimpers 06:25 Countdown 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 Caterham Motorsports 08:05 The Grid 08:30 FIM World Superbikes 09:00 The Morning Line 10:00 The American Football Show 11:00 Frasier 11:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 12:00 The Big Bang Theory 12:25 The Big Bang Theory 13:00 The Simpsons 13:30 Undercover Boss USA 14:30 Channel 4 Racing 17:10 Come Dine with Me 19:40 Channel 4 News 20:00 Double Your House for Half the Money 21:00 Grand Designs 22:00 Iron Man

IRON MAN

22:40 Michael McIntyre's Comedy Roadshow

01:55 Jackpot247 04:00 Columbo: Blueprint for Murder 05:15 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Babar and the Adventures of Badou 07:10 Matt Hatter Chronicles 07:35 Dino Dan 08:00 Canimals 08:25 Sooty 08:35 Horrid Henry 09:00 Bottom Knocker Street 09:30 Fish Hooks 10:00 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 10:25 ITV News 10:30 Saturday Cookbook 11:25 Murder, She Wrote 12:25 ITV News and Weather 12:34 ITV Meridian Weather 12:35 Surprise Surprise 13:35 All Star Family Fortunes 14:20 Catchphrase 15:05 Doc Martin 16:05 The X Factor 17:05 Scooby­Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed 18:45 ITV Meridian Weather 18:55 ITV News and Weather 19:10 New You've Been Framed!

19:45 Stepping Out 21:00 The X Factor 22:00 Through the Keyhole 23:00 ITV News and Weather 23:14 ITV Meridian Weather 23:15 City Slickers

Fantasy action adventure starring Robert Downey Jr, Gwyneth Paltrow and Jeff Bridges. Billionaire playboy Tony Stark is an industrialist and muni­ tions genius who's out in Afghanistan to demon­ strate a new missile system, when he and his mili­ tary escort are attacked by rebels. Though badly injured, Stark is captured and forced to manufac­ ture a weapon.

01:10 William Shakespeare's The

00:00 Piranha 01:40 SuperCasino 04:55 Motorsport Mundial 05:20 Great Artists 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:15 Bubble Guppies 07:25 The Mr Men Show 07:40 Chloe's Closet 07:50 Milkshake! Monkey 07:55 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:15 Noddy in Toyland 08:30 City of Friends 08:45 Little Princess 09:00 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:20 Angelina Ballerina 09:35 Rupert Bear 09:50 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:10 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:20 Roary the Racing Car 10:35 Jelly Jamm 10:50 Power Rangers: Megaforce 11:25 Slugterra 11:50 Animal Maternity 12:50 You've Got Mail 15:05 Columbo: Uneasy Lies the Crown 17:05 5 News Weekend 17:15 Fort Worth 18:50 The Great Escape 22:00 Hang 'Em High

The Courier Sunday TV

September 22

07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Nocturne 00:50 The Football League Show

08:30 Around the World in 80

02:05 Weatherview

Gardens

02:10 BBC News

09:30 Gardeners' World

07:00 Breakfast

10:00 The Beechgrove Garden

08:40 Match of the Day

10:30 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites

10:00 The Andrew Marr Show

12:00 James Martin's Food Map of

11:00 Sunday Morning Live

Britain

12:00 Sunday Politics

14:30 The Incredible Spice Men

13:15 Match of the Day 2 Extra

15:00 Hairy Bikers' Best of British

14:00 BBC News

15:45 Inspire: The Olympic Journey 14:10 Weather for the Week Ahead 16:15 Sailing 14:15 Bargain Hunt 17:00 Canoeing 15:00 Flog It! 18:00 Super League 16:00 Escape to the Country

19:00 The Great British Bake Off

17:00 Points of View

20:00 Hunt vs Lauda: F1's Greatest

17:15 Lifeline

Racing Rivals

17:25 Songs of Praise

21:00 The Crane Gang

18:00 Formula 1

22:00 The Story of the Jews

19:30 BBC News; Regional News

23:00 QI XL

and Weather

23:45 A Single Man

20:00 Countryfile 21:00 Antiques Roadshow 22:00 By Any Means

01:20 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Babar and the Adventures of Badou 07:10 Matt Hatter Chronicles 07:35 Dino Dan 08:00 Canimals 08:25 Sooty 08:35 Horrid Henry 09:00 Bottom Knocker Street 09:30 Fish Hooks 10:00 Big Time Rush 10:25 ITV News 10:30 Ade in Britain 11:25 Columbo: Sex and the Married Detective 13:25 ITV News and Weather 13:29 ITV Meridian Weather 13:30 Murder, She Wrote 14:30 The X Factor 15:30 Big Star's Little Star 16:30 Happy Birthday E.T 17:30 ET the Extra­Terrestrial 19:35 ITV Meridian Weather 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Surprise Surprise 21:00 The X Factor 22:00 Downton Abbey 23:30 ITV News and Weather 23:44 ITV Meridian Weather 23:45 Perspectives

DOWNTON ABBEY

23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 23:25 Match of the Day 2

00:10 The Ring 01:55 Quatermass II 03:20 This Is BBC Two

New series. Harriet Walter (Law & Order: UK) joins the cast as the costume drama returns. Following Matthew's shocking death, new mother Mary is struggling to come to terms with her loss, and Robert and Violet disagree over how to handle the situation. Downstairs, Jimmy finally takes an inter­ est in Ivy, while Carson receives an unwelcome reminder of his past. Mrs Hughes sees a chance to help grief­stricken Isobel, and Thomas has the chil­ dren's nanny in his sights.

00:25 03:05 05:20 06:15 06:20 07:15 07:40 08:35 09:30 10:00 10:30 13:25 13:50 14:20 14:50 15:20 17:40 18:40 20:25 20:55 21:00 Home 22:00 23:35

Man on Fire Hollyoaks SuperScrimpers Kirstie's Vintage Gems Deal or No Deal Ironman 2013 The American Football Show Hard Knocks Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier Sunday Brunch The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Simpsons The Simpsons Take the Lead Location, Location, Location The Spiderwick Chronicles Channel 4 News The Political Slot Kevin McCloud's Man Made Big Fat Quiz of the 80s Alan Carr: Chatty Man

00:25 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 01:15 SuperCasino 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Make It Big 05:50 Roary the Racing Car 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:10 Hana's Helpline 06:20 Angels of Jarm 06:25 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bubble Guppies 07:40 The Mr Men Show 07:50 Chloe's Closet 08:00 Milkshake! Monkey 08:05 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:25 Noddy in Toyland 08:40 City of Friends 08:55 Little Princess 09:05 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:20 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:45 Jelly Jamm 11:00 Power Rangers Samurai 11:35 Slugterra 12:00 Monkey Life 12:25 Police Interceptors 13:25 The True Story 14:30 Thunderbirds 16:15 The Hunchback of Notre Dame 17:55 5 News 18:00 Big Momma's House 2 19:50 Ocean's Eleven 21:55 5 News Weekend 22:00 Conan the Barbarian

40

The Courier Monday TV

September 23

00:50 03:00 03:05 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:15 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

01:20 02:15 03:15 07:00 07:05 08:05

Lone Star Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer The Sheriffs Are Coming Claimed and Shamed Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Country Show Cook Off Flog It! Pointless BBC News Weather The One Show Inside Out EastEnders Panorama Motorway Cops BBC News Regional News and Weather Room 101

Countryfile Holby City This Is BBC Two This Is BBC Two Homes Under the Hammer Street Patrol UK

08:50 Claimed and Shamed 09:20 The A to Z of TV Cooking 10:05 Watchdog 11:05 Robbed, Raided, Reunited 11:35 Click 12:00 BBC News 12:30 Daily Politics Conference Special 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 Weakest Link 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Oceans 16:45 Elephant Diaries 17:15 Incredible Animal Journeys 18:15 Cash in the Attic 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 James Martin's Food Map of Britain 20:00 The Hairy Bikers: Everyday Gourmets 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 Tom Kerridge's Proper Pub Food 22:00 The Midwives 23:00 Never Mind the Buzzcocks 23:30 Weather

00:45 Premiership Rugby Union 01:40 The Store 03:40 Motorsport UK 04:30 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Countrywise 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Doc Martin 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:35 Through the Keyhole

00:35 01:25 02:10 05:45 06:15 07:00 07:10 07:35 08:00 08:25 08:55 09:30 10:00 10:30 11:00 12:00 Away 13:00 13:05 13:35 16:10 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 21:30 22:00 23:00

The Last Leg Paddy's TV Guide American Football Live Ironman 2013 Countdown The Treacle People The Hoobs The Hoobs According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Four Rooms US A Place in the Sun: Home or Channel 4 News Summary Jamie's 15 Minute Meals The Hunt for Red October Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News 4thought.tv Jamie's Money Saving Meals Gadget Man The Fried Chicken Shop Sex: My British Job

TOM KERRIDGES PROPA PUB FOOD New series. The Michelin­starred chef demonstrates recipes inspired by classic British pub fare, begin­ ning with dishes perfect for serving up to groups of friends. Tom shows how to prepare slow­cooked shoulder of lamb with pommes boulangere, and a salt beef bagel prompted by a trip to a stall at Maltby Street market in Bermondsey, south­east London.

00:15 Drive Angry 02:05 SuperCasino 04:55 Michaela's Wild Challenge 05:20 Make It Big 05:50 Roary the Racing Car 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:05 Hana's Helpline 06:25 Angels of Jarm 06:30 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:20 Milkshake! Monkey 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Hustling America 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:20 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:15 Little Girl Lost: the Delimar Vera Story 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Hustling America 21:00 Police Interceptors 22:00 Bullied to Death: The Tragedy of Phoebe Prince 23:00 Under the Dome 23:55 The Thomas Crown Affair

The Courier Tuesday TV

September 24

00:05 01:05 01:10 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:15 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

Who Do You Think You Are? Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer The Sheriffs Are Coming Claimed and Shamed Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Country Show Cook Off Flog It! Pointless BBC News Weather The One Show EastEnders Holby City New Tricks BBC News Regional News and Weather Stacey Dooley in the USA

00:20 Today at Conference 00:50 The Story of the Jews 01:50 The Hairy Bikers: Restoration Road Trip 02:50 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Fit to Rule: How Royal Illness Changed History 05:30 Pompeii: The Mystery of the People Frozen in Time 06:00 History Hunt 06:55 Wonders of Nature: Stoat ­

Play 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 The Sheriffs Are Coming 08:50 Claimed and Shamed 09:20 The A to Z of TV Cooking 10:05 Britain's Big Wildlife Revival 11:05 Robbed, Raided, Reunited 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics Conference Special 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 Great British Menu 15:00 Daily Politics 17:00 Coast 17:15 Incredible Animal Journeys 18:15 Cash in the Attic 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 James Martin's Food Map of Britain 20:00 The Hairy Bikers: Everyday Gourmets 21:00 The Great British Bake Off 22:00 The Wrong Mans 22:30 The Sarah Millican Television Programme 23:00 Later Live ­ with Jools Holland 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 Piers Morgan's Life Stories 01:30 Jackpot247 04:00 Champions League Weekly 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Aussie Animal Island 21:00 Ade in Adland 22:00 Being Paul Gascoigne 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:35 When Ali Came to Britain

BEING PAUL GASCOIGNE The former England footballer gives cameras unprecedented access to his private life over a three­month period for this one­off documentary.

It explores his battle with alcoholism, and begins with his public relapse earlier this year, through to his recovery and a more recent fall from grace, and follows his attempts to rebuild his relation­ ship with ex­wife Sheryl, son Regan and step­ daughter Bianca.

00:20 Educating Yorkshire 01:25 Random Acts 01:30 Om Shanti Om 04:25 Nashville 05:10 Aquamarine 06:55 SuperScrimpers 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 According to Jim 08:25 Will & Grace 09:05 Frasier 10:05 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:00 Four Rooms US 12:00 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Jamie's 15 Minute Meals 13:35 Kirstie's Vintage Gems 13:40 The Devil at Four o'Clock 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Double Your House for Half the Money 22:00 Big Fat Gypsy Weddings 23:00 London Irish 23:30 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown

01:55 SuperCasino 04:55 Divine Designs 05:20 Great Artists 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:20 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Animal Maternity 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 Law & Order: Criminal Intent 16:15 Love Will Keep Us Together 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Monkey Life 20:30 Highland Emergency 21:00 Cowboy Builders 22:00 CSI: NY 23:00 Castle 23:55 Body of Proof

41

The Courier Wednesday TV

September 25

00:35 02:35 02:40 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:15 18:15 19:00 19:30 19:55 20:00 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

Hart's War Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer The Sheriffs Are Coming Claimed and Shamed Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Country Show Cook Off Flog It! Pointless BBC News BBC London News Party Political Broadcast The One Show Watchdog Who Do You Think You Are? BBC News National Lottery Update Father Figure

00:20 Today at Conference 00:50 The Crane Gang 01:50 The United States of Television: America in Primetime 02:50 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools: Children at Work 1 ­ Football 05:30 Schools: Speaking Sport 06:00 Schools ­ In My Shoes Plus: China 06:35 Schools ­ In My Shoes Plus: Germany

06:55 Wonders of Nature: Feeding ­ Food/Eating 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 The Sheriffs Are Coming 08:45 Claimed and Shamed 09:15 Inspire: The Olympic Journey 10:00 Inspire: The Olympic Journey 10:30 Wild Shepherdess with Kate Humble 11:30 See Hear 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics Conference Special 14:00 Lifeline 14:10 Great British Menu 14:40 Cycling 17:10 Incredible Animal Journeys 18:10 Cash in the Attic 18:55 Party Political Broadcast 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 James Martin's Food Map of Britain 20:00 The Hairy Bikers: Everyday Gourmets 21:00 The House That £100K Built 22:00 Science Britannica 23:00 The Culture Show 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 01:20 04:00 04:50 06:05 07:00 09:30 10:25 11:30 13:30 14:30 14:55 15:00 16:00 16:59 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:25 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30 23:35

The Jeremy Kyle Show USA Jackpot247 Loose Women ITV Nightscreen The Jeremy Kyle Show Daybreak Lorraine The Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Dickinson's Real Deal The Alan Titchmarsh Show ITV Meridian Weather Tipping Point The Chase ITV News Meridian Party Political Broadcast ITV News and Weather Emmerdale Coronation Street Big Star's Little Star Whitechapel ITV News at Ten and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Great Night Out

ANIMAL MATERNITY

00:35 01:35 01:40 02:35 03:30 04:00 04:55 05:25 05:50 06:15 07:10 07:35 08:05 08:30 08:55 09:25 10:00 10:30 11:00 12:00 Away 13:00 13:05 13:35 16:10 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:50

Rewind the Tube Random Acts Poker Hard Knocks KOTV Boxing Weekly Beach Volleyball Caterham Motorsports The Grid FIM World Superbikes SuperScrimpers The Hoobs The Hoobs According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Four Rooms US A Place in the Sun: Home or Channel 4 News Summary Jamie's 15 Minute Meals Reach for the Sky Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News 4thought.tv The Three Day Nanny Grand Designs Gogglebox Bouncers

At West Midland Safari Park, the director of wildlife must decide whether to intervene in the protracted delivery of an eland calf, while help is needed at Colchester Zoo when two aardvarks approach their due dates. At Knowlsey Safari Park, an innovative feeding regime helps lion cubs to learn their place in the pride.

00:50 Law & Order: Criminal Intent 01:40 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 02:05 SuperCasino 04:55 Divine Designs 05:20 Great Artists 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 The Railway: First Great Western 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 A Girl like Me: the Gwen Araujo Story 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Robson's Extreme Fishing Challenge 21:00 Animal Maternity 22:00 CSI: NY 23:00 Wentworth Prison

The Courier Thursday TV

September 26

00:05 01:05 01:10 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:15 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

The League Cup Show Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer The Sheriffs Are Coming Claimed and Shamed Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Country Show Cook Off Flog It! Pointless BBC News Weather The One Show EastEnders Waterloo Road Super Giant Animals BBC News Regional News and Weather Question Time

00:20 Today at Conference 00:50 The Midwives 01:50 See Hear 02:20 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools ­ One Hundred Years of the Women's Movement 05:30 Schools ­ L8R Youngers 3 06:00 My Cookery 06:15 Ungu's Dress 06:30 Graffiti Detective

06:45 Jirka and the White Mice 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 The Sheriffs Are Coming 08:50 Claimed and Shamed 09:20 The A to Z of TV Cooking 10:05 Flog It! Trade Secrets 11:05 Raymond Blanc: How to Cook Well 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 Weakest Link 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Oceans 16:45 Elephant Diaries 17:15 Incredible Animal Journeys 18:15 Cash in the Attic 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 James Martin's Food Map of Britain 20:00 The Hairy Bikers: Everyday Gourmets 21:00 The Wonder of Dogs 22:00 Peaky Blinders 23:00 Mock the Week 23:30 Weather

00:35 James Nesbitt's Ireland 01:05 Jackpot247 04:00 Columbo: Publish or Perish 05:20 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Pat and Cabbage 22:00 Women Behind Bars with Trevor McDonald 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:35 Ade in Adland

MY TATTOO ADDICTION

New series. Following last year's documentary about the world of body art, this three­part series explores more stories behind tattoo design. In the first edition, unemployed father­of­six Paul reveals how his facial tattoos prevent him from getting regular work, Duncan expresses his grief at the loss of a friend through the ink on his body, and James shares his desire to escape from his surroundings with his adornments.

00:50 00:55 01:50 02:50 05:25 06:10 06:55 07:10 07:35 08:05 08:30 08:55 09:25 10:00 10:30 11:00 12:00 Away 13:00 13:05 13:35 13:40 Sea 16:10 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 22:00 23:00

Random Acts iTunes Festival 2013 Shameless USA Chaudhvin Ka Chand Deal or No Deal Countdown SuperScrimpers The Hoobs The Hoobs According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Four Rooms US A Place in the Sun: Home or Channel 4 News Summary Jamie's 15 Minute Meals Kirstie's Vintage Gems 20,000 Leagues under the Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News 4thought.tv Location, Location, Location Educating Yorkshire My Tattoo Addiction

00:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 00:55 Inside Hollywood 01:00 Poker 01:50 SuperCasino 04:55 Divine Designs 05:20 Great Artists 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Robson's Extreme Fishing Challenge 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Polar Storm 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 The True Story 21:00 The Railway: First Great Western 22:00 CSI: NY 23:00 Amanda Knox Trial: 5 Key Questions

42

Friday, September 20, 2013

ACCOUNTANTS Pro Business Support – for all your accountan­ cy needs in English; bookkeeping, taxes, wage slips and more.

We cater for companies and self­employed peo­ ple; we can deal with everything for you. Call us on 966 923 963 for first consultation free of charge.

ANIMALS Pet Travel UK family pet transporters Spain/UK. Travel with your pet for free. All air conditioned vehicles (no vans) www.pettraveluk.co.uk UK 0800 612 4922 or Spain 678 756 644 (131)

BOATS FOR SALE GC15: 16m Guy Couach motor cruiser, 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, kitchen, lounge/dining area, and flybridge. 2 x Mercedes 350kw diesel motors.

56000€. Call 966 923 963 or 651 885 200 A57: Rare Vintage 1957 Astondoa Classic Wooden motor launch, 10 m with Perkins diesel engine. All in working order. Needs TLC and re­varnish, great proj­ ect, 6000€. Call 966 923 963 or 651 885 200 .

AIR CONDITIONING

CHURCH SERVICES International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja.

Evangelical non­ denominational church.

Sunday services 11am.

Children's church 11am.

House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier.

Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm.

Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nationali­ ties welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276.

Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3. Pilar de la Horadada. Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Bible study and Prayer.

Home groups meet dur­ ing the week. All wel­ come from any church background or none.

For further information contact PilarChristian.

CommunityChurch@g mail.com or contact Reverend Eddie on 966769300 or 650509606.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) meet at 10.00 each Sunday at their Torrevieja meet­ inghouse in the Torreaguas building on the corner of Rambla Juan Mateo Garcia 104, close to the windmill in Torrevieja, 667 533 597.

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES Busy bar/restaurant in San Javier, close to air­ port, selling up due to health problems. Loyal clientele, ideal location.

Phone 634362820 for further information.

CATERING

FOR SALE. S u p e r m a r k e t ‘Traspasa’.

Fully stocked plus machines / shelving. Been running with present owner 7 years. Good income. In high street Guardamar.

Near Weds market.

20.000€ ONO. Tel: 634 106 460

CARS FOR SALE

Car insurance quotes – new extra discount on fully comprehensive policies at the price of third party!

Excellent prices for expats, all policies and call centre staff in English. We will call you back with a quote. 966 923 963

INSURANCE CASER SEGUROS ­ for all your insurance needs, home, car, health, funeral. Policies available in English and German.

Call Professional Business Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from our friendly staff.

om or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 2 or 3 bed / 2 bath apartments in San Miguel. Lift, communal rooftop pool & solarium, video entry system.

Available for short or long term rent from 350 pcm. Tel 966723437 or 616 493 487. (136) Ref: 61, A lovely two bedroomed ground floor apartment, located in the centre of the small Spanish town of Los Montesinos, With a pleasant communal swimming pool adjacent & all amenities in walk­ ing distance. Long and short term rental avail­ able. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 33, Ground floor spacious 2 bedroom apartment, located in Torre la Mata. Close to all amenities and beach.

3 month rental €300pcm Call: 965 707 188 Ref: 104, 2 Bedroom apartment in Torrevieja, (near gypsy lane), small balcony, near all ameni­ ties and Friday market. €350pcm Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bedroom detached villa

CARPENTER

PROPERTY FOR RENT Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.villaandvacation.c

ALARMS

CAR HIRE

with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near Guardamar. Convenient for all amenities, shops, supermarket, restau­ rants and bars. Short term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 702: Beautiful 2 bedroom apartment, located near los Locos beach, beautifully fur­ nished. Short term rentals from 175€ per week. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situ­ ated in Monino Blanco.

The property overlooks a superb communal pool area, in within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

LONG TERM RENTALS WANTED! Properties, all types, in the Torrevieja area wanted for long term rentals.

Call us on 96 692 3963 CBR32 : 3 bed, 2 bath apartment in Los Montesinos, very spa­ cious 120 m2, fully fur­ nished, with pool on solarium, only 300€ p/m, available end of September, call now on 966 923 963 CBR31 : Town centre apartment in Los Montesinos, with lift, lock up storeroom on solarium, all amenities nearby, spacious 2 bed 1 bath, 250 € p/m 966 923 963 El Chaparel/La Siesta Two bedroom apart­ ment in a quiet gated urbanisation for rent €350 per month plus

bills. Reference No 17 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bed­ room apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a ter­ race outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 KBJ3 : 3 bed penthouse in Guardamar, fur­ nished, fantastic sea view, communal pool and parking, 550 € pcm, call 966 923 963

PROPERTY FOR SALE Home and Contents cover ­ Comprehensive policies for house and contents with CASER Seguros ­ excellent prices for expats; poli­ cies available in. Call 966 923 963 for a quote.

Butia Espana Are you trapped. Need to sell quick. We are the only answer for a speedy sale.UK buyers waiting. www.butiaespana.com Telephone 0800 612 7514 or Spain 678 756 644 (131) Rare opportunity to pur­ chase on Mediterrania III, Gran Alacant. 2 bed­ rooms, 2 bathrooms, Private Parking, F/Furnished, Large communal pools & Tennis courts S/W fac­ ing, Dramatically reduced for quick sale to 126.000 euros. Ref No. K58 Call 627 711 155 for immediate view­ ing RS96 : La Mata, 1 bed­ room apartment, large solarium, communal pool, close to beach, 55.000€, call 966 923 963

CLEANERS

43

Friday, September 20, 2013 RS80 : Spanish style townhouse in Algorfa, totally reformed and redecorated, 110m2, 3 lrg.bedrooms, 1 bath­ room, many extras, absolute bargain at 99,500 €, call now on 966 923 963 for no obli­ gation viewing.

Ref: 510, €70,000.

Bungalow located in San Luis. It is close to the supermarkets, bars and restaurants and is on the local bus route.

An Opel Corsa car is included in this sale.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Lovely Corner property in Novamar V, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms Being sold fully furnished including appliances, Has secure

underground parking and faces large oasis communal pool.

Walking distance to beach. 139.000 Euros, Call 627 711 155 and quote Ref No. K10 Ref: 104 Lovely 2 Bedroom Apartment, close to Shops, walking distance to Friday Market and Town Centre and the beach.

The property is close to the Habaneres Shopping Centre and Aquapark.

Recently refurbished apartment in a good central loca­ tion. Conveniently situ­ ated for all the facilities of this modern vibrant town, and only a few blocks away from Torreviejas excellent sea front with its abun­

CAR BREAKERS

dant cafes, restaurants and shops.

Price €43950 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. BRJ1 – 1 bedroom top floor renovated apartment in San Luis.

Great sea and lake views. 55.000€. Tel. 966 923 963 Immaculate ground floor Duplex, 2 beds, 2 bath, Private Parking, Situated in Novamar, Gran Alacant. Price includes very tasteful furniture and white goods. Walking dis­ tance to all local ameni­ ties and beach. Now only 129,750 euros. Ref No K24. 627 711 155 Ref: 521, €105,000.

This comfortable bun­ galow is located in San Luis with a new roof and solarium tiles. It is close to supermarkets, bars,

restaurants and is on the local bus route. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Don Pueblo, Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Large Kitchen with Galleria, Secure underground parking, Gas Central Heating, Glazed in Porch, Solarium with stunning views.

Viewings absolutely essential. Very large property at reduced price of 190.000 euros.

Ref No. K38 Call 627 711 155 KBJ3 : 3 bed penthouse in Guardamar, fur­ nished, fantastic sea views, communal pool and parking, 155.000€, call 966 923 963 RS1 : 3 bed large villa in Torrevieja on 950m2 plot, private pool,

HOUSE / BAR CLEARANCE

Jacuzzi/sauna, parking, 289.000€, call 966 923 963 Opportunity to purchase at the off plan price of 195.000 euros. Large 4 Bed, 3 Bath Brand new property. Secure under­ ground parking for 2 cars and communal pool. Situated opposite Gran Alacant and over looks projected golf course. Ref No. K52.

627 711 155 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.c om Ref: 78, €120,000.

Three bedroom Quad in Jardin Del Mar VII. There is off­road park­

ing and small storage shed in the enclosed garden area, communal pool nearby. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 2 Bed, 1 Bath Ground floor duplex. Central heating, Grills, Fully fur­ nished, Glazed in Galleria, 2 communal pools, private parking and walking distance to the Gran Alacant com­ mercial centre. Situated in the popular urbanisa­ tion of Puerto Marino.

Now only 96,500 euros for quick sale Ref No. K46. 627 711 155 Ground Floor Duplex, on the Monte y Mar estate of Gran Alacant.

3 Bedrooms, 1 Bathroom, Fully fur­ nished, Private Parking, Communal pool Ref. GA0094 NOw only 83.000e Tel. 680333242

HOME CARE

44

Friday, September 20, 2013

Gran Alacant Detached villa, located in a very sought after location.Situated on a 560m2 S/W facing plot and constructed in 2005. Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms (2 full baths), Lounge­ Diner, fully equipped Kitchen, Porch and Solarium with Alicante & Sea Views. ref.L81. €258,000 neg. Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant Town House with a difference.

2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Quiet Location, Extra storage areas, and South Facing Private Pool as well as 2 communal pools. Fully Furnished, All mod cons. Greenland Views and all local amenities close by. Ref. No L79.

179.000 euros 680 333 242 Ref: 520, €80,000. Two bedroom apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed­in ter­ race and a large solari­ um.

This property comes with a large com­ munal swimming pool.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant immacu­ late villa, 3 bedroomed, 3 bathroomed property maintained to a very high standard inside and out and the interior furnishings are top qual­ ity, offering a feeling of luxury and good taste.

The plot size is 400m2 and has been beautiful­ ly tiles, and graveled and has established palms and plants. Oil

fired central heating throughout, log effect fire place, ceiling fans in all rooms, towel heater rails, glazed in shower units, instant hot water, water purifier, free English TV, phone & internet lines, fitted dou­ ble hanging wardrobes, safe, glazed in front porch, vanity units and much more. The pool is an 8 X 4 m2 salt water pool, meaning mainte­ nance is much easier plus outside toilet and shower. Sea views to front with Greenland views to the rear. ref K51. €245,000 Tel 680333242 Ref 533: Lovely 2 bed­ room duplex located in the popular area of Punta Prima, the prop­ erty has a large lounge and fully equipped kitchen, 2 double bed­ rooms, one with bal­ cony, bathroom with double shower. €126,000 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 516, €39,999.

Studio apartment in San Luis, close to amenities.

Open plan fully equipped kitchen. Good sized lounge, bedroom and out onto balcony which has been glazed to create another room.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 513, €115,000.

Two bedroom ground floor apartment, in Aguas Nuevas, close to all amenities including the beach. It has a good size lounge, kitchen and has off road parking facilities. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

Ref: 709, €60,000 A lovely 1 bedroom apart­ ment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental avail­ able. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: KP3100, €183,000.

Three bedroom, two bathroom detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool.

Garage to side of house. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bedroom apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed­in ter­ race and a large solari­ um.

This property comes with a large com­ munal swimming pool.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Lovely clean detached Villa just as you enter Gran Alacant. Very cen­ tral location, 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Garden Shed, Private Parking, Attractive Gardens, Private pool Ref: K59 240.000e Tel. 627711155 Recently reduced 4 Bed, 3 Bath Villa, in Gran Alacant. Quiet Location, Exceptional

Views.

Converted Under build, 2 Lounges, 2 Kitchens, Private Garage and being sold Fully Furnished, now only 239.950 Ref: L81 Tel. 680333242 Large 4 Bedroom, 4 Bathroom, 2 Kitchens, 2 Lounges, 600m2+ plot Large Retractable Glazed in Pool for all year swimming, Private Parking for 4 cars, Very low­maintenance, Fully Furnished. 330.000e but Negotiable. Very dif­ ferent to the other prop­ erties in Gran Alacant and is disabled friendly Ref: L80 Tel. 680333242 Corner Plot Property in the lower end of Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Under build, Roof top Solarium Being sold Fully Furnished including White goods. Walking distance to all local amenities.

139.950e Ref. GA0087 Tel. 680333242 Limited Edition Fortaleze in Gran Alacant Exceptionally Large Plot. 4 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Large Private Pool with Decorative Garden, Private Parking, Electric Gates, Glazed in Porch, Solarium, Under build.

Quiet sought after area.

Very tastefully furnished

and all included 370.000e Ref. K52 Tel. 627711155 Mid Terraced Townhouse on Avda Polognia, Gran Alacant Furnished to a very high standard and includes White Goods. 3 Bed, 2 Bath, Lounge Diner, Fully converted Under build offering a second lounge and large stor­ age area. Roof top Solarium, Glazed in gal­ leria with extended worktops. Front Garden with BBQ, Communal Pool with Gardens.

132.000e Ref. K16 Tel. 627711155 Semi­Detached Villa with Open Greenland Views to the Rear and Alicante Views to the Front, means this prop­ erty in Gran Alacant would appeal to any­ body looking for a quiet location. Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Lounge diner, with working Fire place, Porch, Solarium, Established Gardens and Private Pool, Private Parking on a large plot. 265.000e

PERSONAL

PETS

Ref. L95 Tel. 680333242 Offers Invited on a mid Terraced Town house in Gran Alacant.

Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Lounge Diner, Galleria, Solarium, Under build.

Communal Pool and Gardens, and with Exceptional Views of Alicante. Being Sold Fully Furnished includ­ ing White Goods. Ref. K42 Tel. 627711155 (reasonable offers only) 2 Bedroom, 2 Bathroom, Unfurnished Mid Terraced Townhouse in GA. Recently decorated throughout means this property is a very clean black canvass. Has Air­ Con & Security Grills and the use of a Communal Pool. Price recently reduced to 110.000e Ref.K12 Tel. 627711155 Reduced for a quick sale to 95.000 e 2 Bedroom, 1 bathroom, Top Floor Duplex in Gran Alacant. Very Modern Property with Many extras. Glazed in Porch, Roof Top Solarium, Wooden Flooring. Immaculate condition and ready to move in. Ref. K15 Tel. 627711155.

Gran Alacant, Situated on the very first urbani­ sation as you enter

POOL TABLES

MAN AND A VAN

PLUMBERS

DRAINAGE

POOLS

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Friday, September 20, 2013 Gran Alacant, this 2nd floor duplex offers taste and quality. Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 1 bath­ room, lounge­diner, independent kitchen, full roof­top solarium with superb views and recently glazed in porch offering extra living area as well as extra privacy as the glass is mirrored.

Ref.K44 €108,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated in the "Alto" part of Gran Alacant, this 3 bed­ roomed, 4th floor apart­ ment, offers luxury accommodation, with absolutely stunning sea views, as well as views of Alicante bay and the famous Santa Barbara Castle.The apartment is 89 square meters with open plan kitchen / liv­ ing room and includes all electrical appliances & furniture also there is a utility room, open ter­ race, and private park­ ing. The urbanisation also offers many com­ munal pools, tennis courts, restaurants and bars.

Ref. K20 €109,000 Tel 680333242

Gran Alacant villa locat­ ed in a very quiet area , situated at the end of a cul­de­sac means there is no through traffic.3 bed, 3 bath, 330m2 plot, established large gar­ dens, working fireplace, solar panel for hot water,private parking, south facing great views, fully furnished, fantastic opportunity. ref. L85. €215,000 Tel 680333242 Beach front Line proper­ ty, over looks Carabassi Beach, Gran Alacant. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Secure Underground Parking, Fully furnished, Roof Top Solarium. 3 Large Communal Pools, Fantastic communal Gardens, Tennis Courts and much more.

125.000 Euros Ref No. K23. Tel. 627 711 155 Gran Alacant, Situated front line to the famous blue flag beaches of Carabassi, the real beauty of this property is its proximity to the beach, but also on offer is a fantastic communal pool situated in beauti­

SURVEYOR

STORAGE

REMOVALS

fully kept gardens with little Spanish walk ways.Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 2 bath­ rooms, lounge diner, American style kitchen including all appliances, roof top solarium with stunning views, front porch area with front garden and a secure underground garage. fully furnished Ref. K23 €125,000 rare opportu­ nity Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant limited edition villa, not very often available on the market. Only a few of this type were ever con­ structed­ Very large 5 bedrooms, 4 bath­ room(2 en­suit) proper­ ty, situated on a large corner plot with a 10 x 5 private pool and private parking. Lounge­diner with working fireplace, fully equipped kitchen with utility room. Large landing area, leading onto solarium, with extra storage external room. Front porch area leading into large well established gardens with irrigation system

and fruit trees. Being sold fully furnished.

Within walking distance to Gran Alacant com­ mercial centre and 5 minute drive to Carabassi beaches. ref.

K11. €270,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant large detached villa with 3 double bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge­ diner, fully equipped kitchen, large porch, roof top solarium, 400 m2 Plot, with estab­ lished low maintenance very private gardens with irrigation system, electronic gates, private parking, outside wc, sink & shower, terraces, air con ( h & c ), mosqui­ to nets, grills, alarmed, large spa pool with sep­ arate Jacuzzi section.

Within easy walking dis­ tance to Gran Alacant commercial centre and close to local bus and tram route. Ref K33. €260,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, detached villa in desirable road close to all amenities,

TRANSLATOR

RAG AND BONE

comprising of 3 double bedrooms, 3 baths, lounge diner with work­ ing fire place, brand new kitchen with all appliances and black granite work tops, pri­ vate pool, plot of 550m2, established irri­ gated gardens and fruit trees, private parking, solarium, also there is a converted under build giving more bedrooms ,bathroom & kitchen, this house has many extras and is being sold fully furnished. Ref.k47. €280,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant south­fac­ ing, very private villa, with woodland and Alicante views. Situated at the end of a small cul­ de­sac which means this villa enjoys a very peaceful location.3 Bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 3 Bathrooms, lounge­ diner with working fire­ place, fully fitted kitchen with including white goods, large front porch, solarium,work­ shop and storage in under build, central heating, air con H/C, ceiling fans, grills, UK T.V, off road parking and plenty of outside park­ ing also. Due to its ori­ entation of this property enjoys full sun, all day, something very impor­ tant in the winter months.

Ref.K24. €237,000 Tel 680333242

QUIZZES Experienced quiz­mas­ ter/question setter with personality available to host quiz nights in local bars. Tel:­ 664 838 581

REMOVALS Move It Now Small removals and deliver­ ies. Spain/UK Budget prices. Last minute jobs u n d e r t a k e n . www.moveitnow.co.uk Telephone UK 0800 612 4922 or Spain 678 756 644 (131)

VAN HIRE

SITUATIONS VACANT RADIO COSTA INTER­ NATIONAL needs moti­ vated sellers. Spanish, English and German language is a bonus but not essential. Training and good earnings guaranteed. For more info call 644 126 600 or email info@radico­ costainternational.com Medaesthetics require a Beautician. Must have NVQ Level 3 and work­ ing self employed email cv to sabinebrooks@hot­ mail.com

SOLICITORS Need English speak­ ing solicitors in Torrevieja? Let us help to solve your problems with debt recovery, divorce, property, fraud, criminal defence. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your spe­ cialist solicitor today

WIG SPECIALIST SALON MAR­ GARETHAS, 23 years in Torrevieja Hair/Wig specialist for Medical ill­ ness and Hair Loss problems. We offer dif­ ferent Hair Replacements, top fillers, Hair prostheses, Toupees and Wigs, Natural and Artificial hair and much more.

Also fashion/festival accessories TV/TS are welcome to our service.

Please call our salon reception for an appointment with Margaretha on Tel no 966 921 846 Torrevieja (90)

WANTED

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Friday, September 20, 2013

Greenside Gossip IVIE DAVIES takes a weekly look at the golf scene - golfdavies@gmail.com

MIRACLE MAKES OLLIE PONDER Ryder Cup hero Jose Maria Olazabal has revealed that he may turn down an invitation to be a Ryder Cup vice­ captain at Gleneagles in 2014 because the event will never match last year’s Miracle of Medinah.

The Spaniard captained Europe to a stunning victory on US soil last September but was asked by his successor, Paul McGinley, to join his backroom team at Gleneagles next year. It was one of the greatest comebacks in the com­ petition’s history as Europe trailed 10­4 at one stage on the Saturday and all the more poignant for Olazabal, given his team dedicated the victory to the memory of his great friend Seve Ballesteros. It is an experience that Olazabal will never forget and he admits he fears it would risk diminishing the memory of that emotional triumph if he joins Paul McGinleys’ backroom team.

“I don’t know if I can answer that question if I want to be a vice­captain at Gleneagles at present and I am not sure I could give Paul a straight answer,” said the affable Spaniard.

“I’d have to think long and hard about it and look at the whole picture. It will depend on how I feel and it won’t be an easy decision after what happened at Medinah. I left there on such a high after such an incredible victory and I don’t think it’s going to get better than that. There’s a history in sport of people who have achieved something great but if they try to come back, it’s just not the same and they lose

some of the shine from what they previously did.”

McGinley, though, appears keen to have Olazabal on board along with another successful former Ryder Cup captain, Scotland’s Sam Torrance. The fact he recently appointed the pair as rival Seve Trophy captains for next month’s event in France was seen by many as the first step to them working under him next September.

And while Torrance, who led Europe to victory at The Belfry in 2002, has fully embraced the idea, Olazabal admits he only took on the Seve Trophy captaincy role in Paris as a favour for McGinley.

This was after fellow Spaniard, Miguel Angel Jimenez (McGinley’s initial choice), said he want­ ed to play on the Euro team at St­Nom­La Breteche. Jimenez is assured of making the side when qualifying ends next week in Italy and it means the 48­year­old will hold the distinction of playing in all eight Seve Trophy events since the inaugural tournament in 2000.

DAZZER GOES STATESIDE Former Open champion Darren Clarke will use the exemption gained from his victory at Royal St George’s in 2011 to rejoin the US Tour next year.

He said that he will be taking up his US Tour card next season, but said that does not mean he is abandon­ ing Europe. We will see! Other new players rolling up for the PGA Tour include Japan’s Hideki Matsuyama; Gonzalo Fernandez­Castano of Spain; and Thorbjorn Olesen of Denmark all having earned enough money or FedEx Cup points.

HORROR START FOR CHELSEA FAVOURITE Andriy Shevchenko's professional golf debut ended with the former Chelsea striker missing the cut, 40 strokes off the lead. Shevchenko shot rounds of 84 and 86 at the Kharkov Superior Cup in his native Ukraine last weekend to end 26 over

TITTER ON THE TEE

KNOW YOUR RULES

A man coming home from golf always liked to push his Mercedes hard and was doing 190 kph on the motorway.

He then noticed that a police car was chasing him. He said to himself: no way, I'm going to let myself be caught by a police BMW. He kicks down the accelerator and the speed goes up to 230 kph.

Being a rule abiding golfer he thinks about it, and decides to slow down and let himself be overtaken by the police car. When both cars are stopped, the police­ man takes the man's papers and examines them without a word.

Then he says "Listen, I'm going off duty in 15 minutes and I'm tired. I don't really want to be bothered writing a ticket. So, if you can give me an excuse that I haven't heard before, I'll let you go."

After hesitating for a minute, our golfer replies: "Last week, a policeman ran off with my wife."

"So what?" says the policeman?

The golfer continues: "Well, I thought it was him trying to bring my wife back."

The policeman replied: "Drive carefully and have a good weekend!"

SEE YOU NEXT WEEK

QUESTION Paul lifts and shows his ball to Alex as he believes it is unfit for play. There’s some mud and grass stuck to the ball, so he places a substitute ball on the spot where the original had been and plays it. What is the ruling?

A: There is no penalty.

B: Paul incurs a penalty of one stroke.

C: Paul incurs a penalty of two strokes.

ANSWER C: Paul is not entitled to substitute another ball and incurs a penalty of two strokes for doing so (Rule 5­3)

par. The former AC Milan and Dynamo Kiev forward, 36, retired from football following Euro 2012.

The former soccer player shot 14­over 86 in Friday’s sec­ ond round of the Superior Cup in his native Ukraine. The 36­ year­old amateur opened with an 84 on Thursday and was 40 shots behind the leader Sihwan Kim of South Korea.

Shevchenko, who plays to a handicap of two, retired from football after playing for Ukraine at the 2012 European Championship. The former European player of the year had taken part in Pro­Am events since then and was invited into the field by the president of the host Superior Golf and Spa Resort in Kharkiv. The former world tennis number one Yevgeny Kafelnikov of Russia also missed the cut on 16 over.

NICK GETS THAI’D UP IN WILDCARD MESS This year’s Presidents Cup is being staged at the Muirfield Village Golf Club in Dublin, Ohio from October 1st, with the international captain Nick Price, and Fred Couples announc­ ing their picks for the International and USA teams. There was no surprise in Couples’ decision to make Webb Simpson and rookie Jordan Spieth his 11th and 12th men, but there was widespread disappointment that Price chose to ignore Thongchai Jaidee’s name as one of his two wild­ cards.

He went instead for Australian Marc Leishman and South African Brendon de Jonge, both of whom are below Jaidee in the world rankings, but also in the Presidents Cup stand­ ings at the time of the announcement. Also, if Price went by current form, the Thai has a record that is comparable to Leishman.

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Friday, September 20, 2013

LONDON CALLING?

Could the Premiership be ‘prized’ away from the Mancunian manacle by Capital Transfer this season? With Man United mov­ ing modestly, and City’s stuttering start to the new season, is this the year the Premiership title is wrested back to the Capital, last won by Chelsea in 2010?

If we crudely crush Crystal Palace’s chances, flush away Fulham’s fancies and strike out Samsammers, all the big three Londoners could be in with a shout, guv’nor.

Each side has strengths and are near the top, but none are the finished article by any means, with work in progress at each club.

Of the triumvirate, it’s Spurs who have been starved of serious silverware the longest, the Lillywhites last landing the league

title way back in 1961 when Mackay, Blanchflower and Greaves were the Capital Kings. But getting lucratively lucky with a certain Gareth Bale transfer, Tottenham have traded internationally, both in midfield with the Brazilian Paulinho and Frenchman Etienne Capoue, upfront with Soldano, a solid Spanish striker from Valencia, plus a promising winger called Nacer Chadli from Belgium. The latest acquisition, and potentially great Dane is a 22 year­old called Christian Erikson from Ajax who is already showing great promise. The big Icelander Gylfi Sigurdsson scored the two that beat Norwich on Saturday, he’s not bad either. White Hart Lane might just be the place to be this year; Spurs are second equal as we speak, one point behind leaders Liverpool… ….and level with their fiercest foes Arsenal. Champions last in 2004, the Gunners are suddenly firing furiously again

Mesut Ozil

MORE MURO MISERY FC Torrevieja lost their first match of the season, 3­1 at Muro, to make it five defeats on the trot at the hands of the Alcoy­based team.

Torrevieja started well with two good chances squan­ dered by Obele, but the home side responded well, and got their first goal at the stroke of the half­time whistle.

That strike took the wind out of the Torrevieja sail, and after the interval they were 2­nil down within a quarter of an hour. Carrasco and Pastor were brought on for Torrevieja, and they livened up matters for a time, but Muro were in control and made it 3­nil. Obele still had chances to get his name onto the scoresheet, but it was Pastor who had an injury time consolation tap in.

FC Torrevieja are back at the Vicente Garcia stadium this Sunday as they entertain Utiel with a 6.00pm kick­off

following their recent smash­and­grab raid sur­le­continent to unexpectedly acquire Real Madrid’s Mesut Ozil ­ for a mere £42.5m. Wow, well won Wenger, but erm... isn’t that yet another midfielder to add to Wilshere, Ramsey, Oxlade­Chambelain, Cazorla, Arteta, Podolski etc? Wouldn’t the money have been better spent on another class striker to help out poor old Oliver Giroud? Mind you young Ramsey’s doing well lately, scoring 3­in­2, inc one against Marseille with Theo Walcott’s goal helping a 2 – 1 victory. We’ll see, in Arsene some still trust.

At the Bridge of Sighs things are not all going well currently. Maestro Mourinho’s moaning, Wednesday’s child was full of woe as the Blues lost 2 ­1 at home against Basel in the Champions League, as Mou tinkers with oldies and newbies. Djemba Ba and Juan Mata, both class acts who would walk into most sides look like yesterday’s men.

Samuel Eto looks to be the latest pooper to join the party, where another Didier Drogba is demanded. Is it a Bridge too far this time, Chelsea a huge hill that Mourinho himself is

Ronaldo celebrates Cristiano Ronaldo cele­ brated his new Real Madrid contract as he hit a Champions League hat­trick in his side’s 6­1 away demo­ lition of Turkish side, Galatasaray on Tuesday night. Ronaldo is now the fourth­highest scorer in Champions League history with 53 goals. He even got a helping hand from new sign­ ing, Gareth Bale, who hit a free­kick that Ronaldo tapped in to make it 4­nil

CRIS IN THE CASH Cristiano Ronaldo has signed a new contract with Real Madrid, saying he could stay at the club for the rest of his career.

Ronaldo and club presi­ dent Florentino Perez appeared in the Royal Box at the Bernabeu Stadium on Sunday after­ noon to announce the new five­year deal.

Ronaldo’s new contract means he will eclipse Barcelona star Lionel Messi as the highest earn­ er in world football, with a new salary of 17 million Euros a year for the next

Elche’s boring point

The best thing that can be said about E l c h e ’ s Monday night goalless draw with Valladolid was that it brought them their 3rd point of the season, allowing them to climb to 17th place in La Liga. A dire match saw Elche have the best of the early exchanges, with Moreno Javi Marquez coming clos­ est to breaking the dead­ lock for Elche midway

through the first half as he struck a powerful long­ range effort over the crossbar.

Both sides took a while to settle after the break, but the home side seemed to dominate after winning a number of corners, but

over? If so, the curse of Real Madrid will have a lot to answer for in Mourinho’s mean­ derings.

Of course, if the mighty Mancunian machinery is to be unbolted, it might not be southern spanners that loosen it ­ nearer home maybe? Liverpudlian life is looking lively again from both the red and blue quar­ ters. Currently top­team, at Anfield Brendan Rodgers has been busy, very effectively building a new Liverpool with gems like Philippe Coutinho and Daniel Sturridge emerging, attempting­with­difficulty to put the controversial Uruguayan unrest to one side ­ for the moment. Over the city at Goodison, a certain young Spaniard has taken the traditional Evertonian strengths and is hell­bent in improving ‘em. Saturday’s comprehensive win over Chelsea, complete with reborn bargain­buy Gareth Barry prom­ ises much towards the trip to the top.

In summary, this season looks the widest open for years, where dormant doors that have been shut for a while are re­opening for business – and it bodes for a hugely­ exciting year.

de Pareja Carles Gil and Edu Albacar's efforts came to nothing ­ with Valladolid defender Carlos Pena clearing the ball on at least one occa­ sion as the away side attempted to keep a clean sheet.

Elche have a golden chance to get their first league win tonight(Friday) as the travel to bottom club Osasuna , who are yet to get a point this sea­ son.

five seasons.

Ronaldo, who had two years remaining on his previous deal, had been linked with a move away from Madrid in the sum­ mer, with the likes of Manchester United and Paris Saint­Germain reported to have shown interest.

Meanwhile, he was on target along with debutant and record breaking sign­ ing Gareth Bale in their 2­ 2 draw last Saturday with Villareal. Barcelona kept their 100% start going after beating Sevilla 3­2.

Monte’s opening winner CD Montesinos kicked off their season in fine style with a one­nil away win at Benijofar. The visi­ tors looked the brightest in the first half, though the only goal of the match was a scrappy affair, as in

the 24th minute, Edu crossed in to give Omar a chance of a shot, with ball hitting the head of a defender to go into the net.

Benijofar were far better in the second half with

Montesinos keeper, Christian having to pull a string of excellent saves.

Montesinos play their first home league match this Sunday at 5.00pm as they entertain Almoradi at the Campo Municipal.

Friday, September 20, 2013

STADIUM OF LIGHT RELIEF!

There’s always one, every season; makes you laugh, with good reason Last year Harry, Quite Poor Rangers; spent a fortune – dahn, no danger!

Now it’s Paolo, standing joke; shouts and screams, what a bloke.

Refs and players, says they’re rotten ­ trouble is, Black Cats are bottom!

Doncha love Potty Paolo Di Canio? How can you sack half Martin O’Neil’s Sunderland side, swiftly sign sixteen new players and expect prompt payback in the Prem?

PP’s latest gaff was actually taunting reliable ref Martin Atkinson to send him off for persistent pesti­ lence ­ which Mart duly did, the Italian’s amazed post­ match protests priceless. Anyone remember the waz­ zock shoving that ref when he was playing, pushing him over? It’s infectious though, his feisty female fuhrer, chief exec Margaret Byrne’s imitating the Italian. She’s riled because FA chairman Greg Dyke, no less, singled Sunderland out for securing only one British signing from 14 newbies, now having only four England­qualified players on their books. OK Marge, you’re not happy, but your Black Cats aren’t purring ­

John McGregor reports

they’re bottom, only one point from four games. Still, steady, Sunderlanders, you’re away to West Brom on Saturday ­ and the Baggies aren’t doing well.

Rivalling Paolo for supreme stupidity is Idiotic Ian Holloway from third­bottom Palace: ‘My opinion does­ n’t count’ he wailed in an interview after being duly dumped 2 – 0 by United. True Ian ­ try telling your team they’re terrific. Palace’ve got Swansea on Super Sunday, the Swalers sweet from locking league­lead­ ers Liverpool 2 – 2, somehow Swans’ Shelvey shared in all four. Still, Sturridge scored again… good job he hadn’t strained himself playing for his country, eh?

Southampton coming Sunday: now Saints have got a real proud England scouser: Three Lions Ricky Lambert, all heart.

Stupifyingly Super Sunday sees the Manchester Derby: United have so many class forwards and strik­ ers, half of ‘em can’t get into the team: Chicharito, Zaha, Kagawa, Young­the­diva, Januzaj is it?­ Seems the perceived lack of midfield power has been addressed with that fine Fellaini fellar fixing it, Maro looked more than mediocre against Bayer Leverkusen. ‘Herr­line’ Rooney’s looking good joining the elite 200 United goals club ­ surely he can’t take ‘wor Bobby’s 249 crown? Hey, prodigal Wayne could market that snazzy woollen Alice­band affair he was wearing, did Colleen knit it for him? Looks ideal for keeping tabs warm this winter, better than last year’s

48

stupid snood fashion. Across town nasty­neighbours City have spent the vast sum of £90m on four for­ wards and midfielders but lack a credible back four where Vincent Kompany, Mikel Richards and Gael Clichy’s injured absences are affecting Premiership progress ­ though midweek’s 3 – 0 demolition of Pizen (no jokes please) showed City’s strength.

Fashions? Don’t tell me the ‘Morman’ look is in? Is Everton’s goalie Tim Howard sporting a shaved head, but bristly black beard? Still it’s working, somebody up there helped him keep a clean sheet to check Chelsea’s choking challenge ­ will Everton’s new Spanish jefe take the Toffees towards the top now, playing Samsammers at Upton Park on Saturday?

Grim East Ender edicts say poor old Andy Carroll may be out till Christmas, with a ‘ballerina­type’ injury, no laughing matter, big basketballers also get that launching ‘emselves up to great heights. Seeing Sunday’s stalemate with Saints sez they miss Handy Andy badly up front.

In the Championship, Harry Redknapp has happily hoisted the Hoops top of that difficult division, bless ‘im, can he keep ‘em there? Leicester are up to sec­ ond equal with Blackpool, with Burnley and Forest two points behind. At the bottom, eight clubs share a two point difference where a win can make all the dif­ ference.