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WHAT’S YOUR “GO TO” KARAOKE SONG AND WHY?

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MARK ANDERSON My song would be “We are the Champions,” because I do not think that I would be singing the song alone. People would be joining in, and I would be less self-conscious.

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KAITLYN KELM I’ve never actually done karaoke before, but I think if I did I would probably do something that’s really popular. Probably something by Katy Perry just ’cause I know all the words, but I don’t necessarily listen to Katy Perry; it’s just easy to remember the words.

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PETR BURDA I would probably pick a song by Pink Floyd, maybe “The Wall,” because I know I won’t forget the words in the middle of the song, and my voice isn’t too good, so I’d pick something that I know.

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COMMENT | EDUCATION

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Abolishing Average Grade creep in college has made us all resemble Lake Wobegon BY ROBERT HEROLD

I

t’s that time of the year. I’m not referring to Christmas season, although Christmas may be an apt metaphor (more on this later); I’m referring to the ending of the academic fall semester. Across the country in Higher Educationland, this week is known as “finals week.” After finals come grades. And it’s those grades that college students are stressing over — stress made all the more intense because of that term paper. (You know — it should have been completed two or three weeks ago, but wasn’t.) Professors typically provide a study guide and set time aside during the last week of class for review. And it is on that day that we get the usual questions: “Do you grade on a curve?” “How long do you want my essay question answers to be?” “What about my term paper — how many words?” (The word count, of course, had been provided in the syllabus.) Then comes my personal favorite: “What do I need to do to get an A?” Last week, when asked this question by one of my seemingly ever-younger freshmen, I answered indirectly: “You know, I was just chatting about this with a colleague. He told me that he has become more traditional about grading — more reliant on the old standards curve — lots fewer A’s. He told me that he is now giving out maybe four A’s in a class.” A moment of shock and awe: “What’s his name? I sure don’t want to take a course from that professor. Only four A’s!” I then tried to explain the standard curve — 10, 20, 40, 20, 10. The gasps were audible: “Only 10 percent A’s!” responded one of the truly shocked. Another followed with, “Forty percent C’s; who would do that?” Then, a surprise: the student in the back row, on the right side of the room (a very bright student by any standards), shot back: “Look, a ‘C’ just means AVERAGE!” “So how do you grade?” asked another student, no doubt concerned that he could be dealing with a teacher who might actually believe that some students were — horrors — average. “I use a standard curve on my first pass through, then I correct for distortions.” “How do you do that?” he asked. “Well, I then go through again and recalculate based on 90 percent and over being an A, 80 percent and over a B and so on. Say you have a 92 percent average but 20 percent of the class has over a 90 percent average; you will still have earned an A.” About this time several other students weighed in: “I deserve an A because I study so hard.” And a corollary: “What about the effort we put in?” This led the student in the back row to come back yet again to his earlier point: “C means average!” I thought I’d try a different tack just to put “average” in a somewhat different light: “I

graduated from a public high school that used a numerical grading system far tougher than what I use. Try this on: A equals 95 to 100 percent; B equals 89 to 94 percent; C equals 83 to 88 percent; D equals 75 to 82 percent. Anything below 75 percent, and you flunked. Forget ‘C,’

you flunked.” This drew not only more gasps but looks of disbelief.

G

rade creep is what we call it in Higher Educationland. Recent articles on this phenomenon focus on grade creep at Harvard, where it seems no C’s are permitted — not even that many B’s. It’s kind of like Garrison Keillor’s Lake Wobegon: “Where all the women are strong, all the men are good looking and all the children are

But do grades really tell us all that much anyway?

6 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

above average.” It’s just that the “above average” would seem, nowadays, to be mostly about esteem building. Grades for “working hard.” Speaking of Christmas, it’s kind of the “I’ve been good” argument. But do grades really tell us all that much anyway? My brother matriculated at Dickinson College during the late ’60s and was a member of Phi Delta Theta (kicked off more college campuses than any other fraternity). His house set a record with 59 consecutive quarters below the college average GPA. Yet his “animal house” of underachievers ended up producing an orthopedic surgeon, an ophthalmologist, five judges, one president of Citibank Netherlands and the American Chamber of Commerce Netherlands, one CFO of Waste Management. Inc., one environmental author, one Assistant U.S. Attorney, one director of curriculum for a large public school system, one director of litigation for a large insurance company, one president of a commercial real estate firm, one college professor, one deputy general counsel of a federal agency (my brother) and others including schoolteachers, state employees and private practice attorneys. Maybe the trick is to get beneath the grades and figure out what really turns students into successful people. But in the meantime, ought we not try to avoid diminishing the efforts of my student in the back row, the kid who really is above average? 

COMMENT | PUBLISHER’S NOTE

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here’s a great line, to me anyway, in The Fantastic Mr. Fox. You see, Mr. Fox — “Foxy” to his friends and family — writes a newspaper column. Charming! But, like me, he asks his wife, “Does anybody actually read my column?” Now I’m happy to report that Mrs. Maher and her third grade class at Roosevelt Elementary have answered in the affirmative. When I wrote in October that maybe all this Inlander stuff really started when I dreamed up fantastic stories as a third grader at Roosevelt, they, in fact, read it and invited me into their classroom. Earlier this week, there I was up in front of the little writers-in-the-making. I did the math, and asked, “So how many years ago do you think I was sitting right there where you are?” “Five.” “Ten.” “Higher,” I said. “A lot higher.” “Twenty.” “OK, try 40.” “Aaagghhh!!” The classroom erupted in a primal cry somewhere between sympathy and shock. But it’s true, it was exactly 40 years ago that I sat in Mr. Hoerner’s third grade class — in the old Roosevelt, of course, before they replaced it. I read them parts of a story I once wrote about how Spokanites Keith and Dorothy Stoffel survived the Mt. St. Helens eruption as they photographed it from a Cessna — trying to explain how you can wring drama even from true stories, aka “journalism” and “history.” They loved the part about how kids got a week off from school after the eruption. Then they carefully read their prepared questions — and others that just popped into their heads. Did I ever read The Hobbit? Why don’t I write a book? When I mentioned that I make the Inlander with my brother Jer, one kid asked if we still fight a lot; another just announced it’s better to be the big brother. I couldn’t disagree, but that unleashed a chorus of grievances along the lines of, “My big brother is so annoying… ” At that moment, a little girl — put upon in the way only an 8-yearold girl can be — stormed in and huffed, “We’re WAITING for you guys in MUSIC!” The class lined up, and I high-fived the kids as they wandered off to the next memory-making moment. With their imaginations bursting and teachers feeding that fire to learn, it was just how I remembered it — the same place where grown-ups encouraged little Ted to dream and imagine. The last kid in line gave me a high-five, then down low, and — yep — I was too slow. Now that kid’s going to write a column people will read. n

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REVERSE MORTGAGE

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Regarding “Ready For Takeoff” (12/5/13): An ideal location for the aerospace industry in Spokane County would be the site of Fairchild Air Force Base if the Air Force ever leaves. It has acres of developable land, rail transportation on the BNSF main line just outside the northwest corner and space for an electricity generating wind farm. Such a complex would generate high paying jobs. Always recall that the Boeing Field site is a former Air Force base. To State Sen. Michael Baumgartner I say that Washington state needs legislators that can get the job done in the allotted time of a legislative session — not with two overtime sessions. Right to Work talk has been around for decades including a vote of the people. Citizens of Washington do not want it because it would drive out the highly skilled workforce.

Spokane needs a real cop as chief, like William Bratton, former New York Police Commissioner and Los Angeles Chief of Police. I loaned Bratton’s book on leadership and management to Mayor Condon, but he may have ignored it. As a native of Spokane, I believe the former city manager system worked much better. JIM REIERSON Spokane, Wash.

A RISK WORTH TAKING

In response to the young man who wrote the heartfelt acclamation of not being lonely in his bachelorhood (“The Case for Being Alone,” 11/28/13): I did live a marriage defined by constant sacrifice to the idol of man being head of the household. But then, I am over 60, and we most often live out what our parents before us LARRY A. DIXON showed. Until — and this is the point of my response Spokane, Wash. — we individually wake up to what a committed marriage is really about. I had to leave my marriage of 25 years because I did not yet understand the difference between accepting the one-sided expectation of my Spokane may soon become a sister city of Detroit. As a sacrifice versus the honest loving com30-year career prosecutor, I am outraged at the mitment to being willing to sacrifice for minimal effort to enforce traffic violations and your loved ones if and when necessary. aggressively prosecute the violators actually Send comments to The difference here is as big as the cited. In particular, the South Hill has been editor@inlander.com. Grand Canyon. turned into a traffic nightmare like the North One can never know how to be preside. pared for real commitment in marriage. The safety of pedestrians, especially the It is not like caring for houseplants. And the incredible elderly and children, is at greater risk on 29th Avenue thrills and growth from meeting the challenges of how since Trader Joe’s was allowed to build. Bright yellow to compromise and/or sacrifice because you love this pedestrian crossing signs need to be placed at both person with your whole intention, whether or not you Fiske and Mt. Vernon. Also, a flashing light system for have any rational understanding of this, is a mystery the crosswalk by Rosauers. No one follows the speed and challenge I do hope this young man someday has limit or cares about pedestrians due to a lack of police the courage to risk. presence. How many of the new 25 cops will Chief Straub dedicate to traffic enforcement? Straub seemed BETTY JO CRITCHFIELD more concerned with turning his stolen bike into a Spokane, Wash. media event.

SOUTH HILL SPEEDERS

LETTERS

MARGIE MONTAGUE GANNON: I am a child of the ’60s, so it has been interesting. Looking back and being honest I see some of the damage it did do and now it looks like it will be legal all over, but look at alcohol and the people it has ruined. We are a country that cannot deal with reality, I guess. SHERRY STOUGHTON: I think very slowly there is a shift in how people see marijuana use... mine has. I’d rather face someone that has hit the bong hard than an alcoholic, any day. MAUREEN PATRICK: I know young adults unable to go forward in their lives because they are stoned and gaming all of the time. Sorry, I think of it as a pathetic drug for the lazys! HAROLD STAAM: When I was a kid I was forced to go to rehab for smoking weed and now my family are very open and accepting of me being a medical ganja patient. I even have shown them pics of weed I’ve got. LAUREN McLEOD: I’ve always thought it should be legal ... I’ve had to quit smoking because I’m looking for a job and though it’s technically legal in Washington state, it’s still a big no-no in the work field, which is upsetting. BOB KUSEL: When I was 15 it was the gateway to hell, the gateway to heroin and a life of addiction, by 30 it was the topic of conversation as the best way to get loose, by 45 it was offered by friends at business meetings, by 60 it was the drug of choice for most of my generation. Now has been replaced by laxatives, Aleve and Viagra. MIKHALE ROGERS: It’s nice to sit down, listen to classic FM rock tunes remembered from my youth, and spark up a doobie to get me past the undergarments commercial on the radio. It’s hell gettin’ old… 

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 9

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COMMENT | SATIRE

A Year to Forget W BY ANDY BOROWITZ

ith six fingers of Johnnie Walker swirling in his tumbler, John Boehner speaks with the assurance of a man on the brink of something big. Just three workdays remain until Congress packs it in for 2013, and the House that Boehner presides over is about to set the record for the least productive year in its history — a quixotic goal that the tawny Ohioan set for himself when he arrived in Washington, in 1991. “Like most of us, I came to this town hoping to make history,” he says, refilling his tumbler. “And, damn it, that’s what I’m about to do.” Downing his glass in one gulp, he reflects upon “all the little things that had to go right” to make the year of epic underachievement possible. “There were the Benghazi hearings, of course, and all the votes to repeal Obamacare,” he says. “But when we shut down the

government in the fall, I started thinking, Jesus, the record — it could happen.” During those heady shutdown days, Boehner didn’t dare speak about the record he had long dreamed of setting — “didn’t want to jinx anything” — but with Congress’s work year set to end Friday, he now admits, “I’m so close I can taste it.” So with the record for worst Congress seemingly in the bag — “I can cross that off my bucket list,” he says — what does John Boehner do for an encore? “It’s going to be tough to make next year’s Congress even worse,” he says, pouring himself another tall one. “But it’s going to be fun trying.” n For more fake news from Andy Borowitz, visit borowitzreport.com.

COMMENT | THE NSA

No Need to Know I BY JIM HIGHTOWER

n the movie plot of a spy thriller, our hero gets captured by agents of a repressive government, and they take him into a dark interrogation room, where the sadistic spymaster hisses at him: “We have ways of making you talk.” Meanwhile, in real life, the director of our National Security Agency hisses at journalists: “We have ways of keeping you from talking.” Well, not quite in those words, but Gen. Keith Alexander, chief spook at NSA and head of U.S. Cyber Command, did reveal a chilling disrespect for our Constitutional right to both free speech and a free press. In an October interview, he called for outlawing any reporting on his agency’s secret program of spying on every American: “I think it’s wrong that newspaper reporters have all these documents… giving them out as if these — you know, it just doesn’t make any sense.” Then came his spooky punch line: “We ought to come up with a way of stopping it… It’s wrong to allow this to go on.” Holy Thomas Paine! Spy on us, OK; report on it, not. What country does this autocrat represent? Alex-

ander’s secret, indiscriminate, supercomputer scooping-up of data on every phone call, email and other private business of every American is what “doesn’t make any sense.” It’s an Orwellian mass invasion of everyone’s privacy, creating the kind of routine, 24/7 surveillance state our government loudly deplores in China and Russia — and it amounts to stomping on our Fourth Amendment guarantee that we’re to be free of “unreasonable searches and seizures.” That’s the real outrage we should be “stopping.” But no, our constitutionally clueless spymaster doubles down on his dangerous ignorance by also stomping on the First Amendment. If this were a movie, people would laugh at it as being too silly, too far-fetched to believe. But there it is, horribly real. n For more from America’s populist, check out jimhightower.com.

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 11

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Spokane’s new community court meets offenders where they are, and looks to help them before turning to jail BY HEIDI GROOVER

O

n the brightly lit first floor of the downtown Spokane library, Robert St. John, bald and bundled in layers, sits quietly on a bench, staring at the floor and eating a brown-bag lunch: a cellophanewrapped sandwich and a bottle of yellow Gatorade. Even with his lengthy criminal record, this may be the first time St. John, 43, has ever been served lunch for showing up to court. He’s here on two counts: trespassing under the freeway and stealing a $28 bottle of Black Velvet from Rosauers. He says he needs stability, counseling and help with his alcohol problem. Here, instead of jail time, he might get it. Past a makeshift security setup and a wall of public

art is the city’s latest experiment in criminal justice. Run by a collection of court and law enforcement leaders, the Spokane Community Court, which debuted early this month, offers nonviolent offenders who commit misdemeanors downtown an alternative to the traditional path. Instead of appearing before a judge at the courthouse and facing potential jail time, they can attend court at the library, where they’re also given a needs assessment and connected with service providers. Affordable Care Act navigators and representatives from groups like Goodwill and SNAP are here, and in an effort to address one of the major barriers to employment and housing — a lack of ID — the department of licensing will be on site once

a month. St. John spent the morning in a library conference room talking with service providers, like those at Frontier Behavioral Health, who he hopes can help him get the medication and counseling he says he needs for anxiety and paranoid schizophrenia. Now he’s waiting to enter the room next door, to agree to a deal that will get his charges dismissed if he gets that help, stays out of trouble and does community service. “This is the first time they’ve ever tried to work with me,” St. John says. “It’s a blessing.” The court is at once a way to address so-called “quality of life” crimes that have plagued downtown’s reputation and a chance to test alternative principles gaining traction locally and around the country. Jail spending is on the rise; evidence that jailing nonviolent offenders reduces their likelihood to reoffend is hard to come by. Locally, the recent report from the Regional Criminal Justice Commission has called on Spokane to find more alternatives to incarceration. At the court, simpler cases of people in need of community service and probation are completed quickly. Offenders with long-term health care, mental health, substance abuse or housing needs are connected with multiple service providers and may be required to appear in community court for check-ins as often as every week. ...continued on next page

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 13

NEWS | JUSTICE “A NEW APPROACH,” CONTINUED... (Some research suggests that people respond to constant feedback from an authority figure, “the black robe effect.”) “We want to remove barriers for them to progress forward,” says presiding Judge Mary Logan, who led the effort to start the court. “If I can effectuate change for one person and another person, that can turn into a group and that can turn into a community.”

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hen St. John appears before Logan, the city prosecutor working his case is one who has in the past recommended jail time for him. But the prosecutor, Adam Papini, and St. John’s public defender have already worked out a deal to offer him services and 16 hours of community service instead.

“I saw him in a different light in community court. He has needs that need to be addressed. I recognize those now,” Papini says later. “There was a time when I measured my success on jail time. I recognize [now] we’re all human and we need to be recognized as human. It’s easier to jail someone if I see them in a light that’s less human.” A lack of buy-in from a prosecutor, among other members of the system — police, probation, service providers — can doom a specialty court. That all those players are working together here sets Spokane’s apart, says Brett Taylor with the New York-based Center for Court Innovation, which has helped Spokane and other cities build community courts. “When you start to challenge people to change the

way they practice, you can get a little pushback,” Taylor says. “You’re taking me outside my comfort zone. You’re subtly saying you don’t think I do things right now, and I need to change.” Police involvement can be especially critical because officers are often the ones directing nonviolent offenders they cite on the street to community court. At a debriefing meeting after the first day of community court, Assistant Spokane Police Chief Craig Meidl told organizers he’d develop a training procedure to make sure officers know to recommend community court to nonviolent offenders they cite downtown. “You guys are taking that extra step,” Taylor told the team. “You’re ahead of the curve.” As community courts gain popularity across the

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nation, success stories are common. Among them is the 13-yearold Red Hook Community Justice Center in Brooklyn, where a recent study showed adult participants were 10 percent less likely to commit new crimes after going through the court and juveniles were 20 percent less likely. Even more tangible: taxpayers saved $4,756 per defendant in avoided victimization and the court saved the city nearly $7 million total. But those kinds of results take years, and that’s making those behind Spokane’s Community Court anxious about patience. “We can’t solve all of the problems of the homeless population in three months,” Logan says. “That’s a ridiculous expectation and no one should have that.” Washington State University’s Jacqueline van Wormer, a professor and researcher with extensive experience evaluating specialty courts, will track the court’s progress. After a few years, van Wormer hopes to have long-term results to study, but she’ll start now by measuring three short-term effects, comparing a set of offenders who went through the traditional system to a group who participated in community court: Are those in community court completing more community service? Are they engaging with more social services and completing whatever services are recommended for them? Are they reoffending less — or at least less quickly? Communities naturally want less recidivism, fewer people returning to the system at all, van Wormer says. But with a complex population battling mental health or trauma issues on top of a lack of basic needs, like housing, she says the city should view even a slower return to crime as a success.

“I saw him in a different light in community court. He has needs that need to be addressed. I recognize those now. “The bottom line,” van Wormer says, “is that we get a better return as a taxpayer to really try to address the underlying needs of these individuals, rather than just strict incarceration.” Grateful for the broad range of support the program is seeing, Logan is careful to say she’s received no pushback to the idea of bringing the community court model to Spokane. But the Downtown Spokane Partnership is watching the court closely. DSP President Mark Richard says he’s behind the idea philosophically, but members of the group, which represents businesses in the downtown core, are worried its location at the library could hurt business. Instead, he says, the group believes the city council chambers at City Hall could be a better option. “The sense amongst my board is that [City Hall] just might be more conducive to that particular governmental function … and not be, if you will, at the front door or the side door connected through a skywalk, with no restrictions into River Park Square and those kinds of things,” Richard says. But the library also has unique benefits: It’s a neutral ground, both for the criminal justice representatives and for offenders. It’s warm and it offers connections to programs like WorkSource, which helps the unemployed find jobs. Plus, as Logan says, unlike traditional court, it’s not “two steps from jail.”

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week after his first appearance, St. John comes before the judge in the makeshift conference room courtroom again. He’s supposed to have eight hours of community service completed, but after a hospitalization and loss of his medications, he hasn’t done any of it. Logan, Papini and St. John’s public defender, Francis Adewale, all say they understand and ask him to try again this week. It’s not perfect, they know, but with a transient population, it’s an accomplishment just to see someone again. “I appreciate you appearing here today,” Papini, the prosecutor, tells him. St. John nods, looks at the floor and leaves the room. n

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 15

NEWS | DIGEST

NEED TO KNOW

PHOTO EYE TO MANAS AND BACK

The Big News of the Past Week

1.

A federal budget deal, negotiated by Sen. Patty Murray (D-Wash.) and Rep. Paul Ryan (R-Wis.), cleared the House of Representatives last week. The new spending plan is likely to win Senate approval in the days ahead.

2.

Detectives believe a fatal home-invasion shooting on the South Hill on Sunday wasn’t a random attack, telling reporters “the victim was targeted.” Investigators are still searching for the gunman.

3.

A federal judge in Washington, D.C., ruled Monday that the National Security Agency’s mass collection of millions of Americans’ phone records is unconstitutional.

4.

Members of the machinists union are divided over Boeing’s proposed contract for work on the 777X airliner. Union leaders rejected Boeing’s offer, but many machinists want a chance to vote on it.

5. YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

A KC-135 waits on “alert standby,” meaning it’s ready to fly in an immediate need, at the Transit Center at Manas, Kyrgyzstan. The base has served as a supply hub for the war in Afghanistan, but operations there are expected to end next year. Inlander staff photographer Young Kwak just returned home from a trip to Manas with a crew from Fairchild Air Force Base. Visit Inlander.com for exclusive images and insights from the trip.

ON INLANDER.com

DIGITS

500

$

16 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

A district judge ruled against the owners of a Priest Lake, Idaho, cabin on Tuesday, writing in her decision that the family has no right to extend their lease on the state-owned cabin site — despite the fact that the remains of their ancestors are buried there.

The tip an anonymous elderly couple left a waitress at the Coeur d’Alene IHOP on Monday afternoon. Their tab was less than $50.

90

What’s Creating Buzz The percentage of Washington’s geoduck exports that go to China, which decided to ban some species of shellfish from the Pacific Northwest and Alaska after finding high levels of a biotoxin in a recent shipment.

EVENTS: Need something to occupy all the family in town for the holidays? Find all the events happening between now and Christmas on Inlander.com.

NEWS | BRIEFS

Move It Along Spokane City Council expands sit-lie restrictions; plus, a lawsuit against the Spokane County Sheriff’s Office CAN’T SIT THERE

In a final 4-3 split vote (the power balance is shifting next month), the Spokane City Council voted Monday to extend the hours during which the city’s downtown SIT-LIE BAN is in effect. The extension, from between 7 am and 9 pm to between 6 am and midnight, brought more than an hour of public testimony, alternating between business interests who said the change will help curb crime in downtown, and activists who said it would criminalize homelessness and add to the city’s law enforcement costs. Councilmembers Mike Allen, Steve Salvatori, Nancy McLaughlin and Mike Fagan voted for the ordinance, praising a provision that only allows the ban to take effect when there is room open in local homeless shelters. Nay voters Ben Stuckart, Amber Waldref and Jon Snyder said the change was poorly timed as local efforts to find alternatives to jail are underway. Stuckart cited court cases and research criticizing other cities’ sit-lie laws and warned that if officers mistakenly arrest someone when shelters are full, the city could be open to a lawsuit. With the other controversial matter of the night, the council deferred a vote on a proposed police contract agreement and ordinance relating to the police ombudsman to Feb. 3. — HEIDI GROOVER

CLOSING THE DEAL

As legislatures across the country have been offering billions of dollars in incentive packages to woo production of BOEING’S 777X airplane to their states, Spokane County commissioners last week passed their own measure to clear the way for a much smaller aerospace company. A few weeks ago, in an Inlander’s story on the local aerospace industry (“Turbulence Ahead,” Dec. 5), County Commissioner Al French revealed that Spokane was a finalist for a future site for Aviation Technical Services, a maintenance and repair company for airplanes. While Aviation Technical Services has been reticent to even confirm Spokane is a contender, the commissioners have voted to sell $19 million in tax-exempt bonds to allow Spokane International Airport to build a hanger for ATS on airport property. As of press time, the bonds were still pending a required public hearing. ATS has been offered a few special incentives — Avista Utilities and the City of Spokane have offered to hook up sewer and power to their facility at reduced cost to ATS, French says — but this is more of a mandatory step. Before ATS can choose Spokane, they need a hanger to land in. “Regardless of whether they went here or went to

Everett or southern Alabama, the same deal structure applies,” French says. He says it won’t cost the taxpayers or the county anything — the debt on the bond installments would be paid through ATS’s lease payments. If ATS ever leaves, Spokane International Airport would own the hanger. Spokane County used a similar bond to create a hanger for Associated Painters, the aircraft painting company that located to Spokane in 2010. “ATS is waiting for us to take their action on this, and they have one more internal approval, and then it’s a done deal,” French says. — DANIEL WALTERS

SUSPECTS SUE

Four former suspects in a Spokane County Sheriff’s Office investigation into sex trafficking in 2012 have filed a FEDERAL CIVIL RIGHTS LAWSUIT against the county, alleging they were wrongfully arrested and publicly defamed over unsubstantiated accusations. The claim, filed last week, alleges sheriff’s investigators gave undue weight to accusations from a 21-year-old woman, who said the four people had drugged her and forced her into prostitution. In May 2012, authorities raided their Spokane Valley home, jailing them for nearly a week. Plaintiff attorney Richard Wall says any reasonable detective would have been more skeptical of the woman’s statements. “Nothing was corroborated,” he says. Sheriff Ozzie Knezovich says investigators were pursuing what they believed to be a very serious crime. They later released the suspects and have since closed the case. The lawsuit does not list an amount for compensation, but seeks damages for violations of civil rights and due process, false arrest, defamation, negligence and emotional distress. — JACOB JONES

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DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 17

NEWS | HEALTH CARE

A bill sponsored by Rep. Kevin Parker (R-Spokane) to combat fraud was passed nearly unanimously.

A Law to Nowhere

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

Washington’s Legislature passed a bill intended to fight Medicaid fraud and save millions last year — then it died a quiet death BY DANIEL WALTERS

T

he $111,705 the state Medicaid system Spokane), to explore using similar technology to gave to Crystal Edgington bought a lot prevent fraudulent payments. Parker believes it of things. It went to a home on a golf could immediately save the state millions, but the course in Sequim, Wash. It went to Seahawks Washington State Health Care Authority — with season tickets. All that money was supposed to the power to do something about it — is skeptical, provide in-home care for her mother. Instead, and so far hasn’t been willing to take the next from May 2008 to January 2012, she illegally step. transferred it to her father. edicaid fraud cases can take years They were caught, condemned in press and years to wind through the court releases from the Attorney General’s Office and system, so it’s better to not pay the sentenced to 30 days in jail for Medicaid fraud. crooks to begin with. Parker’s bill tasked the And her case is just a drop in the bucket. Health Care Authority to seek out contrac“The units of measure for losses due to tors who could provide a “predictive analytic” health-care fraud and abuse in this country are system. Using algorithms similar to those banks hundreds of billions of dollars per year,” Harvard and credit card companies use to detect credit health-care fraud expert Malcolm Sparrow testicard fraud and identify theft, they’d analyze data fied before Congress in 2009. “We just don’t to automatically detect and prevent suspicious know what the first digit is.” transactions. He predicted that by taking health“We would be the first state in the care fraud seriously, the nation could country leveraging technology in the save as much as 10 to 20 percent of Send comments to private sector and applying it to our what it spends on Medicare and Mededitor@inlander.com. public sector approach,” Parker said in icaid. Today, with the number of those a February 2012 video message. Relaon Medicaid dramatically expanding, tively conservative estimates, he says, indicate the risk of fraud — on the part of everyone from that preventing more fraud could save Washdoctors to petty thieves — may be even greater. ington as much as $300 million per biennium. Traditionally, Washington state has been Similar programs have saved many times more on the forefront of anti-fraud innovation; it was than they’ve cost. one of the first states to track down Medicaid “It would buy a heck of a lot of teachers,” fraudsters using data analysis. In spring 2012, he says. His bill passed both houses with only a the state Legislature nearly unanimously passed single vote — a Republican — against it. In a 2012 a bill, sponsored by Rep. Kevin Parker (R-

M

LETTERS

– Felonies & Misdemeanors – – Traffic Violations – – Restoration of Gun Rights – – Expungements of Records –

902 North Monroe, Spokane, WA 99201

18 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

fundraising email, Parker cited “aggressive steps to stop Medicaid fraud” as one of his major accomplishments. But after more than a year passed with little apparent progress, it seemed to Parker that the HCA was dragging its feet. At the beginning of this month, he finally heard: The plan to use predictive analytics has been dead since fall 2012. “If I would have known, I would have been calling them every single week, gently nudging them along,” Parker says. “I trusted them to get the job done.” While the HCA sent 19 vendor requests for information and analyzed their responses, it never went any further. “Really, it was pretty clear to us once we got all of that together — the technology really shows some promise, but it’s not really a mature process at this point,” says Cathie Ott, HCA division director. “We didn’t consider it to be cost-effective.” The law encouraged the state to issue “requests for proposal” after requesting information, but only if vendors could save the state money without adding cost or delays to the state Medicaid system. Ott says the HCA vigorously examined vendors’ responses, but says many were vague about the anticipated costs and benefits. Some of the vendors focused on detecting fraud after it had occurred, instead of preventing it in real time. Many relied on vastly different definitions of “predictive analytics.” (Sparrow, the health-care fraud expert, dismisses “predictive analytics” as mostly a marketing term for slightly more sophisticated analysis of data.)

P

arker’s disappointed. He says it’s not unusual for legislation to run into trouble when it hits the state bureaucracy, but he trusted the HCA, giving them the flexibility they requested in his bill. “The Health Care Authority did not follow the intent of the legislation,” Parker says. “They did the bare minimum.” He doesn’t buy the notion that the technology isn’t ready. Parker says he recently contacted two of the vendors — LexisNexis and Emdeon — and they told him that despite HCA’s skepticism, the technology exists and could be swiftly implemented. “LexisNexis assures me that they could have their version adapted to [Washington] state’s existing system and have it up and running in no more than a month,” Parker writes in an email. LexisNexis gave scant specifics to Washington state on how much its program could save, according to HCA’s assessment document. Emdeon provided significantly more detail, but HCA still wasn’t satisfied. “They did not go into any specifics about their cost model,” Ott says. Beyond looking over the initial answers, however, the agency never sought out those specifics. Asked whether HCA contacted Emdeon or any other vendor for more information, Ott says it hadn’t. Louis Saccoccio, executive director of the National Health Care Anti-Fraud Association, says the federal government and state agencies nationwide have been moving toward using data models to prevent fraud, instead of just detecting it. Starting in May, he says, states have been allowed to use federal funds to data-mine for fraud. After contracting with LexisNexis to create an identity fraud pre-verification system for public assistance programs like Medicaid, Florida has already saved far more money than it anticipated. In September, Massachusetts launched a Medicaid fraud-prevention program to automatically identify suspicious claims before reimbursing them. But Ott says that Washington, unlike Massachusetts or the federal Medicare system, relies increasingly on separate “managed care” organizations to handle the ground-level details of Medicaid, making statewide analysis of fraud difficult. Parker isn’t deterred. He says he’s willing to keep working with HCA, but there’s a lot of money the state has missed out on by not using the technology. “I am prepared to run further legislation if the HCA does not follow through on the true intent of the legislation to force their hand for the sake of taxpayers, the poor and the most vulnerable,” Parker says. n

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 19

NEWS | UNEMPLOYMENT

Bouncing Back

Unemployment benefits are expiring, but there’s reason to be optimistic about Spokane’s regional economy BY DEANNA PAN

A

n estimated 25,000 jobless workers in Washingjobless benefits will drop to 26 weeks or less in every ton — including 1,480 in Spokane County — will state. Three days after Christmas, 1.3 million people lose their federal emergency unemployment across the country will lose their unemployment benefits. benefits at the end of this month, according to the state Another 3.6 million will lose their benefits by the end of Employment Security Department. 2014. The U.S. budget deal, brokered last week by Sen. Congressional Republicans argue that the economy Patty Murray (D-Wash.) and Rep. Paul Ryan (R-Wis.), is recovering — the jobless rate is now 7 percent, down does not include an extension of the Emergency Unfrom nearly 10 percent at the height of the recession — employment Compensation and that extending the benefits discourages program. Since July 2008, people from entering the workforce. But Chad Congress has extended the Stone, chief economist of the Center on BudWorkSource Spokane is located at 130 S. program 11 times to help the get and Policy Priorities in Washington, D.C., Arthur St. Call (509) 532-3000 or visit long-term unemployed cope says it’s too soon to let the program expire. wa.gov/esd/spokane. with the economic downtown. “Technically, we’re out of the recession, Jobless workers in Washingbut we’re having a very slow job recovery and ton received up to 63 weeks of unemployment insurance the labor market is not back to normal,” Stone says. He — 26 weeks of regular benefits from the state and 37 notes that the long-term unemployment rate, representweeks of emergency benefits thanks to federal aid. Acing the number of people who have been looking for cording to ESD, the federally funded program has paid work for 27 weeks or longer, is 2.6 percent, “twice as more than 452,000 people in Washington $6.3 billion in high as it’s ever been before when we let this program unemployment benefits. expire. Now, for the first time in five years, the maximum “We need jobs,” he says, “and we’re not getting length of a time that an unemployed person can receive there.”

WORKSOURCE

20 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

But in Spokane County, there’s reason to be optimistic about job prospects for the long-term unemployed, says Spokane’s regional labor economist Doug Tweedy. Roughly 6,000 jobs were created in Spokane County in the past year, beating Tweedy’s projections. These jobs mainly came from advanced manufacturing; transportation and warehousing; health care; and something called “professional, scientific and technical services,” thanks to the new Washington State University medical school. As these industries grow, fields that took a hit in the recession, such as construction, retail and leisure and hospitality, are bouncing back. For the first time in five years, the jobless rate in Spokane County dropped below 7 percent in September. “I think this will be sustainable,” Tweedy says. “We’ve laid a good foundation for recovery. It has been

“We need jobs, and we’re not getting there.” slow, but because of that good foundation, [the job market] is really diversified. We have five industries that are leading this recovery and [creating] good paying jobs.” If your unemployment benefits are ending and you’re looking for work, Tweedy and ESD recommend stopping by your local WorkSource office for assistance in finding a job and improving your marketability to potential employers. “Fortunately, the economy is starting to increase in its recovery,” Tweedy says, “and hopefully as they come off these benefits, there will be job opportunities out there.” n

NEWS | PUBLIC SAFETY

Deadly Measures New details emerge surrounding Christopher Parker’s death at the jail BY JACOB JONES

A

registered nurse with the Spokane County Jail appears to have violated protocols when she did not order hospital care for a diabetic inmate who later grappled with corrections deputies and died in a restraint chair last February. During a prolonged struggle detailed in newly released records, jail deputies tasered Christopher J. Parker twice and later pushed his head down into his lap as they strapped him into the restraint chair. As he was doubled-over in the chair, he lost consciousness and died. Parker, 33, had called 911 in the early morning hours of Feb. 24, seeking help after ingesting methamphetamine and becoming disoriented in Browne’s Addition. A Spokane police officer described him as somewhat coherent, but acting paranoid and lost. “Parker then said that he is a diabetic and might be having some problems with that,” the officer reports. “I requested medics to check him out.” A Spokane Fire Department ambulance crew measured Parker’s blood sugar at 250 milligrams per deciliter, above normal, but within a common range for a diabetic. Despite his elevated blood sugar readings, Parker was booked into the county jail on a warrant for late child support. County Detention Services Director John McGrath says the Spokane jail medical staff considers 70 to 110 mg/dL to be the normal range for blood sugar, but can treat inmates with blood sugar up to 400 mg/dL. He says the jail has a “long-term” policy requiring hospital care for anyone above that threshold. “If their blood sugar is over 400,” McGrath says, “we’re taking them to the hospital.” When Parker checked into the jail shortly after 4 am, registered nurse Kerrie Fernland measured his blood sugar at 416 mg/dL. Records indicate the nurse described Parker’s blood as “maple syrup,” encouraging him to take several units of insulin to lower his levels. “Fernland kept offering the insulin, but Parker continued to refuse,” investigators report. Fernland, a jail nurse for three years who had been awake for nearly 24 hours at this point, according to her statement, moved on to other duties, planning to check back later.

F

ellow inmates described Parker as restless or paranoid. He paced around the holding tank. Less than an hour later, he was taken out for processing and he continued to fidget, rubbing his short-cropped hair and glancing around. When corrections deputies went to put him back into a cell, he tensed up and became “uncooperative.” Corrections Deputy Sandy Rief told investigators they tried to place him in an isolation cell at the end of the hall when he “turned on” them. Deputies told investigators Parker demonstrated extraordinary strength; at one point Rief

reports, “Parker managed to grab the door frame and was pulling himself literally toward the door with all three deputies on top of him.” During the struggle, Deputy Timothy Wirun fired his Taser, Christopher Parker striking Parker in the side, investigators report. Parker reached back and pulled out the wires and Wirun jabbed the Taser against Parker, using a “drive stun” to deliver a second brief shock. Deputy William Miller reports the deputies managed to get a restraint belt around Parker’s legs. They then “half dragged, half carried” him into the hallway. Parker continued to buck and thrash as they muscled him into the restraint chair and struggled to strap in his legs. “[Parker] was pushing his hips forward,” investigators report. “This caused Miller to push his head down into his lap to keep him from making these violent moves and stop that action.”

N

urse Fernland, who returned during the struggle, says she immediately had deputies sit up Parker, who had lost consciousness, and put an oxygen mask on him. She told investigators she decided to keep Parker in the chair for officer safety while they called 911. Parker soon went into cardiac arrest. Due to miscommunication between the jail and dispatchers, AMR ambulance crews took more than 10 minutes to respond. Medics and deputies performed CPR on Parker for nearly 20 minutes before pronouncing him dead. The Spokane County Medical Examiner later determined the cause of death to be a combination of three factors: methamphetamine toxicity, along with his diabetes and the physiological stress of being forced into restraints. Manner of death was listed as homicide. The autopsy report shows Parker’s blood sugar had spiked to more than 2,000 mg/dL, about 20 times the normal level. With the investigation now closed, the case remains with the Spokane County Prosecutor’s Office to determine if there was any wrongdoing. McGrath says he plans to launch an internal investigation of the incident after the prosecutor releases a decision. Multiple attorneys have filed notices on behalf of surviving family members, setting the stage for potential litigation in the future. When asked by investigators if they witnessed any inappropriate actions, Fernland and deputies all answer no. Fernland told investigators Parker was flailing out of control and fighting all attempts to help. “Once he was in the chair, he repeated the statement, ‘Just kill me,’” Fernland reports. She also recalled him saying something to the effect of, “‘How do you justify doing this because I didn’t make child support?’” 

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 21

COVER | POT

W

hether you still think marijuana can turn people into crazed maniacs, Reefer Madness style, or you’re about to use this very page as a rolling paper (bad idea), you’ve probably realized by now that we’re at a major crossroads in marijuana history. As Washington becomes one of the first two states to legalize and regulate recreational marijuana, a national tidal wave is surging. For the first time since the polling firm started asking, Gallup reports that a majority of Americans say they support legalizing marijuana and nearly 40 percent say they’ve tried the drug. Twenty states have medical marijuana laws on the books, and this fall, a year after Washington voters passed Initiative 502, four cities in Michigan and Maine legalized or decriminalized recreational marijuana. Earlier this month, lawmakers in Uruguay voted to legalize and regulate pot. This week, as the Washington State Liquor Control Board plans to close the application window for the state’s first legal marijuana entrepreneurs, let’s remember how far we’ve come. Consider this your cannabis CliffsNotes. (HG)

GONE TO POT With Washington state on the cusp of history, an abridged look back at how we got here BY HEIDI GROOVER AND MIKE BOOKEY

Around 2700 BP: Taking cannabis to the grave Among the earliest known instances of the plant’s use, cannabis was used to make paper or rope in ancient Asian civilizations. It was ground into flour and used in gruel; later, it was prescribed as medicine. But a tomb studied by researchers over the past decade suggests ancient civilizations may have been waking and baking too. Researchers

tested a stash of plants they found buried with a well-off 45-year-old shaman in northern China, part of a roving clan of blue-eyed, light-skinned nomads near the Gobi Desert. Believed to be from around 2700 BP (that’s Before Present, calculated as before 1950), the plants, lightly pounded in a wooden bowl and still surprisingly green, were can-

nabis. While ancient hemp clothing and rope have been found in the area, they’ve been dated to years after these plants were buried, leading the team to conclude in the Journal of Experimental Botany that, “The cannabis was presumably employed by this culture as a medicinal or psychoactive agent, or an aid to divination.” (HG)

} {

Lawmakers in the colony of Virginia declare that every household with hemp seeds must grow them the following season.

Aug. 2, 1619 The Continental Congress adopts the Declaration of Independence, which was signed on paper made of hemp.

July 4, 1776 Icon Attribution: Gareth, Juan Pablo Bravo, Emma Frances Cormick, Ted Grajeda, Chris Kerr, Juan Pablo Bravo, Martha Ormiston, Björn Andersson, Edward Boatman, Stephen West, Kelly Hamilton, Piero Borgo, Andrew Heins

22 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

1700s

George Washington was growing fields of this stuff...

It’s true that George Washington and Thomas Jefferson grew cannabis plants in their fields. But it’s not like they shared a blunt during breaks of the Continental Congress. The sort of cannabis they grew was hemp, which they harvested — with varying levels of financial success — for its oil, seeds and fibers, used to make rope, clothing and other old-timey goodies. It was considered a good supplement to tobacco farming, which could damage a farm’s soil. Industrial hemp was used widely in the United States until 1937, when Congress banned marijuana, which also extended to hemp. It remained legal to import processed hemp into the country, which American businesses continued to do. When imports of hemp and other useful fibers from Asia were cut off during World War II, the U.S. government released a short film in 1942 entitled Hemp for Victory, which instructed farmers how to plant and care for the crop in the hopes of making up for those lost imports. But as drug prohibition ramped up in the following decades, industrial hemp crops were eradicated from the country. In 1998, Canada introduced regulations by which farmers could grow industrial hemp, a possible reason why seemingly every high schooler on the continent wore hemp necklaces that year. In 2011, the country’s agriculture departments reported almost 40,000 acres of the plant. Hemp production is still banned by federal law, but several states have passed laws legalizing industrial hemp. However, hemp farming has not become a reality in those states because the Drug Enforcement Administration has hampered such efforts. With Colorado legalizing marijuana in 2012, farmers in the state harvested their first crop of industrial hemp this year. (MB)

“The most dangerous drugs of all” America’s journey from a love affair with hemp to a gripping fear of marijuana reached new heights with the Comprehensive Drug Abuse Prevention and Control Act of 1970, which classified marijuana as a Schedule I drug. According the DEA, Schedule 1 drugs have “no currently accepted medical use and a high potential for abuse. Schedule I drugs are the most dangerous drugs of all the drug schedules with potentially severe psychological or physical dependence.” The next year, President Richard Nixon called drug abuse “public enemy number one” and declared the need for a “new, all-out offensive.” Spending on the drug war increased. Concerned parents formed anti-drug groups; Nancy Reagan

1970

launched her “Just Say No” campaign. And despite concerns in the ‘70s that they didn’t work, the 1980s saw a return of mandatory minimum sentences, linking criminal punishments to the amount of drugs involved in an offense. Federal penalties for “trafficking” 100 marijuana plants became the same as those for 100 grams of heroin. (Other trademarks of the massive drug war, like “three strikes, you’re out” laws and incentives for snitches, soon followed.) In a 1986 speech, the Reagans stood in the West Hall of the White House, and the president counted his successes: Marijuana use among high school seniors had decreased from 1 in 14 to 1 in 20; meanwhile, the nation was spending triple what it had five years prior on the drug war. “These are … emerging signs that we can defeat this enemy,” the president told the nation. “But we still have much to do.” (HG)

Dec. 29, 1925 A news brief in the New York Times explains that Mexico has just outlawed marijuana, ending on this note: “Marihuana leaves, smoked in cigarettes, produce murderous delirium. Its addicts often become insane. Scientists say its effects are perhaps more terrible than those of any intoxicant or drug.”

1962

States across the country adopt tough penalties for marijuana possession and sale. In Georgia, a second conviction for selling marijuana to minors could result in the death penalty.

} { Americans weren’t always terrified of cannabis. They had to be taught to be terrified through the first few decades of the 20th century. Cannabis had been used for medical and recreational purposes with little, if any, regulation up until the early 1900s, but few people were using weed, so nobody paid much attention. But the Mexican revolution had sent immigrants north into the border states of the U.S. and they brought their pot with them. Over the next couple of decades, authorities in Texas, California and other border states characterized these immigrants’ “marijuana” (the new, Spanish name for the drug) use as being responsible for violent crimes. At the same time, pot was arriving in port cities around the country by way of sailors

and immigrants from the Caribbean, and the burgeoning jazz scene, comprised almost exclusively of African Americans, was getting in on the reefer, too. The racial thread seen here has not been lost on historians. Harry J. Anslinger, the commissioner of Federal Bureau of Narcotics, was an outspoken proponent of marijuana prohibition, often giving sensationalized speeches and articles in which he culled gruesome details from police reports, attributing these crimes to their perpetrator’s use of marijuana. Newspapers around the country willfully bought into the notion of marijuana as a gateway to insanity and murder. This sensationalism is best remembered in the form of the 1936 film Reefer Madness, in which seemingly ordinary young Ameri-

cans become murderous psychopaths after a few puffs on a joint. The film was not widely circulated to mainstream audiences upon its release, but gained a cult following in the 1970s — as a comedy. By 1937, the Marijuana Tax Act was passed by the U.S. Congress, effectively making the drug illegal in the country. There remains a racial element surrounding marijuana. A recently released American Civil Liberties Union study found that between 2001 and 2010, blacks were 3.73 times more likely to be arrested for marijuana as whites, despite the fact that the two groups use the drug at about the same rate. (MB)

Early 1900s: Pot might make you kill people? DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 23

The prescriptions for what ails you

1983 COVER | POT

L.A.’s police chief and school district launch Drug Abuse Resistance Education (D.A.R.E.), now taught in schools across the nation.

1974

Willie Nelson is arrested for marijuana possession in Dallas, the first in a long string of arrests for America’s favorite outlaw/country superstar/pothead. He’s now on the advisory board of NORML, the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws.

1973

Oregon becomes the first state to decriminalize marijuana possession. Other states, like California, Colorado and New York, as well as the Netherlands, follow.

Marijuana has become more socially acceptable among young people and increasingly among the middle class. Convened by President Richard Nixon, the National Commission on Marijuana and Drug Abuse presents its report to national lawmakers calling for the country to reevaluate its views of marijuana and consider decriminalization.

March 22, 1972 24 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

1998

Marijuana prohibition in Washington began to crumble in the late 1990s, most notably in 1998 when the state’s voters made possession and use of cannabis for medical purposes legal. Initiative 692 passed by a convincing 58.97 percent of the vote, winning in all but nine counties, with 54 percent of Spokane County voters supporting it. With Oregon passing a similar medical marijuana law that same year and California having done so two years prior, the entire West Coast had become medical-marijuana friendly. The trend would spread east over the next 15 years, to the point that now 20 states have some sort of allowance for medical marijuana, with Illinois and New Hampshire being the latest to join in this year. Washington’s medical marijuana laws have led to a lightly regulated and at times confusing system with plenty of gray area, especially when it came to medical marijuana dispensaries, which had at different times been shut down by the federal government. Now with marijuana becoming legal for anyone over the age of 21, the state has had to re-evaluate its medical regulations. This fall, a multi-agency panel provided a list of recommendations to the Washington State Liquor Control Board — the agency overseeing the implementation of Initiative 502 — as to how to deal with medical marijuana in a landscape where the drug already will be widely available at state-supervised stores. On the list were recommendations that the state create a database of medical marijuana cardholders who would be exempt from paying taxes on marijuana, that patients be re-evaluated, and to disallow medical groups from working primarily in the field of medical marijuana authorization. The panel also suggested that medical patients no longer be able to grow their own marijuana plants, and would drastically lower the amount of usable cannabis a cardholder could possess from 24 ounces to 3 ounces. (MB)

October 2006 Illinois Senator and presidential hopeful Barack Obama distinguishes himself from Bill Clinton at a meeting of the American Society of Magazine Editors: “When I was a kid, I inhaled frequently. That was the point.”

Aug. 16-17, 1991 What we now know as the massive pro-pot “protestival” Seattle Hempfest starts as Washington Hemp Expo in Seattle’s Volunteer Park.

Cheech and Chong’s first featurelength movie, Up in Smoke, follows the super-stoned duo to Mexico to buy a van made entirely of marijuana.

1978

Meanwhile, the drug war continues, marijuana arrests increase and New York City cops focus on “quality of life” crimes, including pot. Loud condemnation of marijuana is becoming a new tactic for baby boomers to separate themselves from ’60s hippie culture. Arkansas Governor Bill Clinton, frontrunner for the Democratic presidential nomination, famously says he “experimented with marijuana a time or two, and didn’t like it. I didn’t inhale and I didn’t try it again.”

March 29, 1992

The Simpsons episode “Weekend at Burnsie’s” airs, following Homer as he tries medical marijuana. Doctor’s instructions: “Toke as needed.”

April 7, 2002

Lighting up legally

2012

Fast forward to what may be the most exciting time for marijuana since its discovery. Last December, under a night sky and the light of the Space Needle, Seattleites bundled in winter jackets and gathered to light up. The night marked the first phase of implementation of Initiative I-502: possession of an ounce or less by someone 21 or older was now legal in the state. (While it’s never been legal under 502 to smoke in public, we all know things work a little differently on the west side, where Seattle police have all but ignored pot since 2003.) And with that, the nation’s eyes turned to Washington — and Colorado, where voters also legalized recreational bud — as state and local regulators began crafting and implementing the laws that would govern a newly above-board economy. This week, the window closes for applicants looking to take part, but unanswered questions remain. For one, how will marijuana businesses store their cash, since federally certified banks are unable to accept what’s still considered illegal money? Ask Mark Kleiman, a UCLA professor who’s written extensively on drug policy and consulted for the state on its new pot policies this year, about our chances of getting this whole thing right, and he’ll start by rattling off the things he worries we’re getting wrong. There are flaws in the law, he says, like too few protections against marketing to minors, too few training requirements for those selling pot, and a tax model that will drop as the price drops, which he says will increase the number of heavy users accessing the drug. But he believes the liquor board is prepared to adapt, and he calls Colorado and Washington “good places to have started” because they’re more isolated than smaller states like those on the East Coast. (The Department of Justice has emphasized its worries about pot crossing state borders.) Plus, he adds, Washington “has that progressive-era, honest, competent public administration, and that matters.” “Whatever happens,” Kleiman says confidently, “we’re going to learn from the experiences in Washington and Colorado.” (HG)

Nearly half of all drug arrests in the U.S. are for marijuana, up from 34 percent in 1995.

2010 After November’s elections in Washington and Colorado, President Barack Obama tells ABC’s Barbara Walters “we’ve got bigger fish to fry” than cracking down on states that have legalized marijuana.

December 2012

Growing and Buying in the New Market

2014

When it starts granting licenses in February or March of next year, the Washington State Liquor Control Board will start with growers and processors in hopes of creating a market able to meet the (who knows how high) demand for legal weed. Then the board will move on to licensing stores. While there will be no limit on the number of growers or processors licensed, each county in the state has been assigned a number of retailers allowed. (Spokane County will get 18.) There’s no formal launch date when stores can open, but the board thinks we’ll be shopping by the summer. The year is also likely to bring more moves to legalize. Oregon, for one, is already seeing an effort to get a 502-like initiative on the 2014 ballot. (HG)

Uruguay’s Senate approves legislation to allow the legalization and state-run regulation of marijuana.

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With overwhelming support in both the state Senate and House, the Idaho Legislature voted to pass a resolution reaffirming its “opposition to efforts to legalize marijuana for any purpose in the State of Idaho.”

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GIFT GUIDE RECORD SHOULDER BAG

MUSIC from bob dylan to metallica christmas sweaters BY LEAH SOTTILE AND LAURA JOHNSON BOB DYLAN BOX SET:

THE COMPLETE ALBUM COLLECTION VOL. ONE, USB BOX In the 1960s, the use of the harmonica in Bob Dylan’s songs helped catapult his career. Now a brand-new compilation of the artist’s work is being packaged in the form of the instrument. That’s right: You can now purchase a box set, containing a USB drive, inside a large harmonica-shaped case. Six decades of the singersongwriter’s catalogue are included in this set — a whopping 35 studio titles, six live albums, the “Side Tracks” compilation and a digital booklet in high-quality FLAC format. Though it’s a steep $319.98, the USB collection is a limited, numbered edition. Bob Dylan lovers will cry with happiness when opening this up during the holidays. (LJ)

BEATS BY DR. DRE HEADPHONES

iPod earbuds don’t have anything on these colorful, super-size, earmuff-esque headphones. The squishy foam of the ear covering offers optimal comfort, while the audio speakers are the ultimate in the concert-inside-your-head experience. Not only does the device tout 10 hours of battery life, the headphones can sync to any Bluetooth-enabled audio device. Averaging $200 per pair, these headphones are some of the best on the market — Dr. Dre even thinks so. (LJ)

No, it’s not a murse (man purse); it’s a portable storage space for vinyl records. For the ultimate album collector in your life, this sort of messenger bag can offer heightened status among their record-loving peers, showing they mean business when they shop for hidden treasures at flea markets and garage sales. Bags come in a variety of sizes, offering enough room for 40 to 150 LPs at a time. Keep in mind, smaller is better here, as it won’t be so weighty and nerdy-looking. The Magma LP Bag 40 II DJ Package on Amazon.com not only carries 40 records, there’s even space for headphones and extra needles in the front pocket. (LJ)

THE VELVET UNDERGROUND:

WHITE LIGHT/WHITE HEAT 45TH ANNIVERSARY SUPER DELUXE EDITION The Velvet Underground has already had a big 2013 for a band that last performed together in 1996. Fearless leader Lou Reed passed away in October, and Macaulay Culkin formed a pizza-related Velvet Underground tribute band, Pizza Underground. This month, the White Light/White Heat reissue three-disc box set was released in celebration of the 45th anniversary of the innovative album that many found difficult to get into. Including both mono and stereo of the original record, a vast array of bonus and previously unreleased tracks (“Hey Mr. Rain”, “Guess I’m Falling in Love” and “The Gift”), the set is the perfect addition to last year’s Velvet Underground and Nico Boxed Set release. (LJ)

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PITCHFORK REVIEW SUBSCRIPTION While everybody else in the publishing industry is freaking out about how to get to readers digitally and create amazing, brain-busting websites, the people at Pitchfork.com are going the other way. The 17-yearold website of mostly eye-rolling hipsterdom that somehow exists in the daily morning website queue of music geeks (OK, maybe just me) is launching its first quarterly music print publication, devoted to long-form features. It’s one of those magazines that’s more like a book: meant to sit on a bookshelf, not on the back of your toilet. Nab a year-long subscription for the music fan in your house for $50, or buy them a single issue for $19.99. thepitchforkreview.com (LS) HAWKWIND:

WARRIOR ON THE EDGE OF TIME EXTENDED EDITION Psychedelic rock fans the world over still bow at the altar of Hawkwind, giving thanks to the first person who sold the members LSD, helping form the band’s vision. Way back when, Hawkwind fused together psychedelic sounds with drawn-out jam sessions and heavy riffs. The band’s fifth album, Warrior on the Edge of Time, gets a makeover this year: remastered from the original analog tapes, with eight new tracks — including five brand new ones — and a cool collectible booklet with photos and writing. $24 (LS)

33⅓ BOOK SERIES

Move over, Encyclopedia Britannica: This is an 88-book series, all devoted to modern music nerdery. Each book is devoted to deconstructing every possible detail of legendary albums — from classics like Led Zeppelin IV to Exile on Main Street, to post-punk masterpieces Meat is Murder and Unknown Pleasures. There’s a book on nearly every album you’d expect to see there, and then every now and then a random surprise will pop up — like a book on the Minutemen or Liz Phair. Music lovers will derive irrational amounts of happiness from this series. $11ish (LS)

NIRVANA: THE COMPLETE ILLUSTRATED HISTORY For the insatiable Nirvana fan in your life, this one will be a winner. This new hardcover tells the same Nirvana story you’ve heard before, from the days of Kurt Cobain as an avid Melvins fan to their rise in the Seattle scene and reluctant superstardom. But in this book, you’ll get Nirvana’s genesis in a more illustrated format: lots of pictures, pages from Cobain’s journals, snapshots and amazing early 1990s show flyers. A great coffee table book for any fan of the band. $27 (LS) VOLUME 2014

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TWO-DAY WRISTBAND We’ve had such a good time at Volume, the Inlander’s music festival, the last couple of years that we decided we’d do it again in 2014. The festival will be held next year in downtown Spokane, again on May 30 and 31, hosting a variety of music from local, regional and national acts. We’ve got big ideas for next year, so you’ll want to be there. Get a two-day wristband now for a discounted price; print your receipt at home, then bring it into the Inlander office to swap it for your wristband. Act fast: We have limited numbers of these discounted tickets for sale through Dec. 23. $15. Buy online at volume.inlander.com. (LS)

HEAVY METAL

UGLY HOLIDAY SWEATER If, like me, you don’t like spending your hardearned cash on something you’ll only wear once, you might get some mileage out of a few bands’ weird foray into Ugly Christmas Sweater-land. It seems like it started as a joke last year by Slayer, but this year a bunch of bands are jumping on the ugly sweater bandwagon: Queens of the Stone Age, Metallica, Devildriver, Dying Fetus — an entire line of sweaters from Victory Records. There are Christmas trees and Santas and reindeer… humping reindeer, to be exact. They’re all funny, but I’m kinda partial to the Master of Puppets sweater that Metallica has for sale. $75, metallica. com (LS) 

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multimedia GIFT GUIDE

VIDEO GAMES

BY SARAH MUNDS NEXT-GENERATION CONSOLES

2013 marks the next generation of consoles, the obvious gift for a gaming loved one being their choice of a new gaming system. You’d better love the socks off of your giftee: These consoles aren’t coming cheap. Sony’s shiny new PS4 runs around $500 while the Xbox One from Microsoft carries a price tag of $600. You’ll probably be aware of your giftee’s drool-inspiring desire for one of these consoles, as console gamers tend to be opinionated and loyal to their respective brand. An entirely separate issue plagues New Generation Console Season, though. Game development has temporarily plateaued because of the platform changeover. There are no awesome games out for the old console; developers don’t want to invest in soon-to-be-outdated hardware. But since the new console is still in its infancy, games for the new platform haven’t had their chance to mature (or, in 2013’s case, the release of most cool games has been delayed until next year). As far as gift-giving, this is the stuff of nightmares. Do you give them older games from earlier in the year? Do you give them gift cards for when the games come out? Or do you just sit in your house, gift-less, paralyzed?

CONSOLE PARAPHERNALIA

One of the most overlooked facets of New Generation Console Season is the console paraphernalia. Did a little birdie tell you that little Johnny was getting a PS4 for Christmas? Pick up a nifty spare controller that will be much used and very appreciated. Or try some neat-o customized controller grips. Same goes for cables, which are constantly being lost, chewed on, or stolen. Gamers weep that there are never enough cables to connect and charge (especially since the PS4 isn’t sending charge cables with extra controllers this time around). Try an extra-long Micro-USB, the hottest of hot commodities, or an HDMI cable. You can also take a look at the cornucopia of headsets on the market. Turtle Beach headsets are top of the line and have a certain “cool factor” and prestige.

STEAM GIFTS

While console peasants are struggling away during New Generation Console Season, the elite race of PC gamers worship Steam, an online retailer of downloadable computer games, compulsively curating their game collection through Steam’s library application, exhibiting displays of bravado by comparing libraries with their elite PC gamer

28 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

bats, bikes & assassins

friends. Want to be that super-cool gift-giver who knows what’s what in the PC world? Get that gamer some good old-fashioned game downloads. Literally any game can be found through Steam or another online game retailer such as Amazon. Buying and sending a gift and emailconfirming Steam codes is harder than wrapping up a CD and giving it to them, but PC gamers aren’t known for enjoying media the easy way. They do things the PC gamer way.

SIX-PACK OF COORS AND RIDE TO HELL: RETRIBUTION

(RATED M; PS3, XBOX 360, PC) Nothing says “I love and cherish you” like giving someone Ride to Hell: Retribution, possibly the worst videogame ever conceived by mankind. Add a six-pack of shitty beer and you have the best Christmas gift possible. The premise of Ride to Hell is simple: Jake Conway, bad-boy Vietnam vet with a penchant for hookers, must avenge the brutal murder of his younger brother. The power of his mullet and insatiable need for vengeance prompt him to embark on a journey to annihilate the biker gang that stole his brother’s precious youth. This game appears to have been inspired by craptastic biker tattoos, or perhaps the results of a 1980s acid trip. Ride to Hell likely was birthed when game developers released scrapped game material last-minute in an attempt to recoup invested capital. This game is so bad, it’s a hoot. Properly intoxicated, it’s a downright riot.

THE ANNUAL FIRST PERSON SHOOTER

Gamer gifting inevitably dictates the obligatory “Annual First Person Shooter,” an endearing term applied to games like Call of Duty and Battlefield. The story remains exhaustingly similar year after year — the new Call of Duty is released, gamers clamor for the newest edition of online trash talk and newer multiplayer maps, parents/ girlfriends/boyfriends break down and buy the game for Christmas... the cycle repeats as long as new first person shooters are released like clockwork every fall. This year is no different. Call of Duty: Ghosts and Battlefield 4 are on the menu for 2013 and your gamer surely wants one of them. Fortunately, the Annual First Person Shooter is so cyclical and predictable, the games make a fairly safe gift if you have an extra $60 laying around. ...continued on page 30

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 29

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Food

GUZZLES AND GRUB

THE DISTRICT Only one restaurant in Spokane serves the Hooligan & Hannigan. That distinction belongs to O’DOHERTY’S IRISH GRILLE (525 W. Spokane Falls Blvd. • odohertyspub.com), the Irish Pub founded in 1992 by husband-and-wife team Tim and Sam. “The Hooligan & Hannigan is a reubenstyle sandwich named after an old Spokane restaurant,” says Sam. “We do our own corned beef and serve it up with sauerkraut, Thousand Island and Swiss cheese all melted together.” For an even heartier main course, try the Tullamore Dew

Whiskey Steak or the popular seasonal meatloaf meal. If you’re only looking for a quick respite from shopping, there are cheese- and bacon-laden potato fries called McGinnity Fries (aka Irish nachos), and The Hodgepodge, which is layer after deepfried layer of onion rings, mozzarella sticks, steak fries and chicken dippers served with a variety of sauces. You can wash this outstanding pub fare down with the transatlantic imports you’d expect, like Guinness, Harp or Newcastle Brown Ale. RED LION BARBECUE (126 N, Division • redlionbarbeque.com) swears you’ll never go away hungry or short-poured. How could you? The $30 Super Combo offers a choice of three meats (pork tenderloin, beef tips, ribs, chicken or salmon) in premium barbecue sauce, sides of homemade fried bread and onion rings, and is big enough to feed four. Plus the happy-hour drink prices run all day. The food at THE DISTRICT (916 W. 1st • spokanedistrictbar.com) takes a more sophisticated approach to all-American fare, pairing its beer-infused French fries with a side of truffle oil or topping its grilled pork chips with bourbon pepper sauce. The impressive wall of quotes in the newly opened RIVER CITY BREWING TAP ROOM (121 S Cedar St • rivercityred.blogspot.com) should prove as inspirational as their Spokanecentric specialty draft beers, which include popular stalwarts like the mildly malty River City Red and the hop-heavy River City IPA as well as seasonal brews. Draft root beer to slake the thirst of any under-21 companions is currently in the works.

Get some serious shopping done as your kids enjoy some HELP FOR PARENTS  holiday fun at Mobius Kids. Drop the kids off for a showing of the classic holiday movie, playtime, snacks, crafts and snow science on Friday, Dec. 20 from 1-4

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pm and another session from 5:30-8:30 pm. Cost: $15 per event. Mobius Kids, River Park Square. Visit: mobiusspokane.org Call: 624-5437 These free rides are sponsored by STCU and run through Christmas Eve (Fridays from 3-8 pm, Saturdays-Sundays from noon-5 pm & Tue, Dec. 24, from noon-3 pm.) Pickup is at the corner of N. Wall and W. Main. Visit: Downtownspokane.net Call: 4560580 has been brought to you by the Downtown Spokane Partnership and the Business Improvement District in conjunction with the Inlander. For more info go to DowntownSpokane.net. Happy Holidays!

RIDE IN STYLE 

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First Night

Excellent! I have the perfect gift for him!

Tues, Dec. 31; most events start at 7 pm Get together with friends and family this New Year’s Eve and enjoy a seemingly endless list of activities and performances as part of Spokane’s annual First Night festivities, themed “Once Upon a Night — Art Comes Alive.” The night kicks off with the Kalispel Tribe’s Masquerade Parade at 6 pm, leading from the Spokane Convention Center to Riverfront Park. If you have little ones, a special Kids Night Out takes place at the Convention Center from 3-6 pm. From 7 pm until the midnight countdown, attendees can enjoy the diversity of events — more than 150 performers at 40-plus venues. Top it all off in the park at 11:50 pm by welcoming in 2014 with the fireworks show. Admission buttons $15 through Dec. 30; $18 on Dec. 31 (kids under 10 free with paying adult) • firstnightspokane.org

River Park Square (509) 456-TOYS SPECIAL ADVERTISING SECTION

Events

HARMONY FOR THE HOLIDAYS

Dec. 20 at 8 pm - A concert benefiting Catholic Charities Spokane and Second Harvest food bank, featuring internationally acclaimed singers Jonathan Mancheni and Isabella Ivy. $25. Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague Ave. bingcrosbytheater.com (227-7638)

ICE SKATING

Now Open - Riverfront Park’s Ice Palace is now open through March 2, Tue-Sun from 11 am-5 pm, and also Tue-Thu from 7-8:30 pm and Fri-Sat from 7-10 pm. Extended holiday hours TBA. Adults $4.50; kids age 3-12, military and seniors (62+) $3.50. Skate rental $3.50. (Free admission coupons available from participating downtown retailers, good from Nov. 22-Dec. 19, excludes skate rental.) spokaneriverfrontpark.com (625-6601)

CHRISTMAS AT THE BING

THE CHRISTMAS SCHOONER

Dec. 21-24, Dec. 26-29 - Films include “Arthur Christmas” (11 am), “Disney’s A Christmas Carol” (1 pm), “Elf” (3 pm) and “Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas” (5 pm). Dec. 21-24 and Dec. 26-29. Please bring a nonperishable food item to benefit 2nd Harvest Food Bank. Riverfront Park, spokaneriverfrontpark.com St. (625-6600)

Runs through Dec. 22 - A holiday musical telling the true story of the ships that transported Christmas trees across the Great Lakes. Performances held weekly Thu-Sat at 7:30 pm and Sun at 2 pm. $22-$30. Spokane Civic Theatre, 1020 N. Howard St. spokanecivictheatre.com (325-2507)

HOSPICE TREE

Dec. 21 at 8 pm - Attend a holiday concert hosted by Douglas Webster and featuring national and local performers singing traditional holiday favorites. $12-$22. Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague Ave. bingcrosbytheater.com (227-4704)

RIVERFRONT PARK FILM FESTIVAL

Through Dec. 23 - Hospice of Spokane displays its Memorial Tree for community members to honor loved ones by hanging a dove ornament on the tree. Free. River Park Square, Third Level, 808 W. Main Ave. hospiceofspokane.org (456-0438)

Dec. 21 at 8 pm, Dec. 22 at 2 pm - Morihiko Nakahara conducts the annual Holiday Pops Celebration concert, featuring holiday music and featuring the Spokane Symphony Chorale and Spokane Area Youth Choirs. $26 and up. Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox, 1001 W. Sprague Ave. spokanesymphony.org (624-1200)

AWAY IN A BASEMENT

CHRISTMAS DINNER

Dec. 19-Jan. 5 - A holiday-themed musical comedy starring the lovable Church Basement Ladies. Thu-Fri at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $12-$28. Interplayers Theatre, 174 S. Howard St. interplayerstheatre.org (455-7529)

CAMPBELL HOUSE HOLIDAYS

Starts Dec. 20 - See what the historic Spokane mansion would have been like during the holidays in 1910, with professional local actors portraying residents like the cook, family members and visitors. Included in regular museum admission, $5-$10. Dec. 20-22, Dec. 26-29 and Jan. 1-5 from noon-4 pm each day. The MAC, 2316 W. First Ave. northwestmuseum.org

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HOLIDAY POPS

Dec. 25 - Favorite holiday dishes from the Davenport’s kitchen are served a la carte in the Palm Court Grill and the Safari Room. The Davenport Hotel, 10 S. Post St. Reservations suggested, can be made online or via phone. davenporthotelcollection.com (455-8888)

PUTTIN’ ON THE RITZ

don't forget stocking stuffers Boo Radley’s Uncommon Gifts

232 N. Howard . 456-7479 across from the carousel

Dec. 31 at 9 pm - Ring in 2014 in style at the Spokane Symphony’s New Year’s Eve Ball, following its annual performance of Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony (7:30 pm, $16-$28), featuring hors d’oeuvres, a champagne toast, live music, dancing and other festivities. $65-$75. Davenport Hotel, 10 S. Post St. spokanesymphony.org (624-1200)

“NEW”

It’s all about the at our downtown Spokane branch. New year. New branch. New rate on balance transfers.

Say hello to 2.14% APR* when you transfer your balance to a Numerica Visa® Platinum or Gold card. Only at our downtown Spokane branch (502 W. Riverside). *Here’s the legal stuff. Offer good December 10-31, 2013 and at the Numerica downtown Spokane branch (502 W. Riverside Avenue) only. Promotional 2.14% APR (Annual Percentage Rate) on balance transfers to a new or existing Numerica Platinum or Gold card through December 31, 2014 (promotional period). The special rate only applies to the amount transferred. After promotion period, or when the balance is paid off, your purchase APR will be the purchase rate as stated in the cardholder agreement. As of 12/9/13, the variable purchase rate for our Platinum card is 5.25% - 12.25% APR and for our Gold card, the non-variable purchase rate is 8.90% - 17.90% depending on credit worthiness. Cash advance rates are higher. Rates subject to change. Offer not available on Business Visa or to pay off existing Numerica loans or lines of credit. Account must be in good standing. $20 membership fee for new members. Federally Insured by NCUA.

SPECIAL ADVERTISING SECTION

multimedia GIFT GUIDE continued

VISIT FIRSTNIGHTSPOKANE.ORG FOR MORE INFORMATION.

RASPBERRY PI & ALL THE TRIMMINGS Though not technically a videogame, the Raspberry Pi remains a strong contender in the “badass and even educational videogame-related Christmas gift” category. Premise? The Raspberry Pi is a credit-card-sized microcomputer that allows complete customization by an amateur computer scientist or programmer. You literally can do anything with a Raspberry Pi, from programming your own robotics control board to running a BitTorrent server. Why did the Raspberry Pi make it onto this list? Because this little computing powerhouse can be programmed to run as a retro console simulator. In non-nerd-speak, this means that you can make it play arcade games, and by extension, create your very own basement video arcade. Cue the heavy breathing and speechless excitement! Although not ideal for kids, the computer-illiterate or the “casual user,” there’s a certain niche of people who would have a nerd-gasm over the Raspberry Pi as a Christmas gift.

BATMAN: ARKHAM ORIGINS

(RATED TEEN; PC, XBOX 360, WII U, PS3) Everyone secretly wants to be Batman, and buying the next installment in the series is vastly more practical than having your gamer running around the house, cloaked in a black sheet, whispering “I am the bat.” Batman: Arkham Origins, which came out earlier this year, is a well-received prequel to the two existing games we know and love, Arkham City and Arkham Asylum. It’s also a good catch-all if you don’t know quite what to get someone. Plot and story arc are edgy enough to captivate the mind of an older gamer, while the Teen rating makes it appropriate for younger players. It’s also a good gift if you’re looking to portray the gift-giver as someone along the lines of “I know enough about videogames not to get you Mario Party for the Wii U, but I’m still nonchalant enough to not be a nerd.”

13TH ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATION

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 31ST DOWNTOWN SPOKANE PICK UP YOUR PASSPORT and return it when completed to one of our four convenient locations (Spokane Convention Center, INB Performing Arts Center, Bank of America, and River Park Square) during the First Night event. 7p.m. to 10 p.m. Complete information at firstnightspokane.org

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ation For complete event inform rg e.o an ok visit FirstNightSp

XBOX 360, XBOX ONE, WII, WII U) Family-friendly games that aren’t completely lame are hard to come by. On one hand, you might have young kids who need milder game content that’s ready to harness their unstoppable waterfall of energy. On the other hand, you might have a surly teenager who isn’t about to be involved in anything that isn’t cool enough for their swagtastic aesthetic. The Just Dance series has skillfully been able to bridge this gap for years now. The secret? You can’t escape fun when you’re up twirling around, frantically flapping your arms to your favorite songs on the radio. Some improvements over earlier editions include better motion sensor technology and karaoke modes. Just Dance has been getting a lot of attention from adults for the workout-side of the game as well. After the kids go to bed, sneak downstairs and boogie off those extra holiday pounds with the game’s non-stop workout routine.

BUY YOUR ADMISSION BUTTON EARLY & SAVE!

2014

• $15 through Dec. 30 • $18 on Dec. 31 • Children 10 & Under FREE

Admission buttons now available at Cenex Zip Trip Stores, River Park Square Concierge, Aunties Book Store & Aunties Annex, and Tickets West.

OVER 150 PERFORMANCES AT 40 LOCATIONS INB Performing Arts Center Haran Irish Dancers and Floating Crowbar 7 p.m., 8 p.m. & 9 p.m. and The Curt Show 10 p.m. & 11 p.m.

4TH ANNUAL 5K RESOLUTION RUN Starting in River Front Park at 6:45pm on New Year’s Eve, Entry is Free!! For complete race information go to firstnightspokane.org

SPONSORED BY NUMERICA CREDIT UNION

Hotel Packages Available

Convention Center Ballrooms A&B – 7 p.m. – 11:40 p.m. - Variety Show with Alex Zerbe, David Lichtenstein a.k.a., Leapin’ Louie, Dan Raspyni, The Comedy Circus Show and Charlie Williams, The Noise Guy. Miss Abbey’s Steampunk Spectacular, Blue Door Theatre, Bopping Heads and much, much more. North of Main Avenue Singing in the New Year Finale – IMAX Theatre 7 p.m. – 11:40 p.m., Free Carousel Rides sponsored by STCU, Fox 28 Main Stage dancing until midnight, Spokane Civic Theatre players at Wheatland Bank Drive-thru West of Post Street Ballet at the Bing, 48 Hour Film Festival, Comedy, Theatre, Drumming, Music, Crafts and Magic. South of Main Avenue Music and dance from Latin to rock and roll, visual arts, craft making and more

FREE PARKING & SHUTTLE SERVICE Shuttles every 10 min. from Riverpoint Campus

Midnight Fireworks Spectacular by

32 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

JUST DANCE 2014 (RATED E; PS3, PS4,

See package listings at www.visitspokane.org,

3-6pm at the Spokane Convention Center Crafts, Live Performances, And more...

Extended hours 7-9pm

ASSASSIN’S CREED IV: BLACK FLAG

(RATED MATURE; PC, PS3, PS4, XBOX 360, XBOX ONE, WII U) You could essentially rename this game “Assassin’s Creed: Sneaky Sneaky Pirates on the High Seas, Ho!” and it would have the same appeal. Assassin’s Creed fans inexplicably adore everything Assassin’s Creed... even this pirate-themed edition, most definitely a thinly veiled attempt at leeching off the success of the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise. And it worked. Gamers revere this game with enough veneration that the Pope should be jealous. It can be safely assumed that somewhere, some giftee is just dying to chew on their very own copy of Pirates of the Caribbean 2.0. For the whole experience, don’t just stop at the game. Your pirate gift bundle should include an eyepatch, pirate hat and a bottle of rum.

THIS MMO OR THAT MMORPG

You know those people who stay in their bedrooms all weekend with the blinds closed, logging countless hours on World of Warcraft or Eve Online? Believe it or not, they’re paying for that online access. More unbelievable, they’d appreciate getting a couple of months of subscription for a gift. Basically, this present can be interpreted one of three ways: “I don’t want to see any more of you than I already do, so please huddle in your basement and keep playing this game,” or “I know enough about you and what you care about to know that you will actually use this,” or “An obsession with online game play in which you never leave the house is a good way to get over that particularly nasty breakup.” Take it as you will, it’s an option. Especially if you’re OK with not seeing much of this friend for the next several months. 

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 33

multimedia GIFT GUIDE

BOARD GAMES TAKENOKO

Giant panda bears are so adorable and cuddly, but they’re kind of a nuisance if you happen to be the imperial gardener of Japan. The emperor of Japan received a panda as a peace gift from the emperor of China and then let it loose in the gardens. The panda wants to munch on all the bamboo and the gardener must maintain the flawless garden that the emperor demands. In this Japanese-themed action point game from the same designer who came up with 7 Wonders and Tokaido, two to four players score points by feeding the panda’s out-of-control appetite, helping the angry gardener grow more bamboo and cultivating the garden in different patterns for the emperor. You can also spend some time admiring the cute panda game piece — he’s clutching his big round belly in his greedy little paws.

MONSTER FLUXX

The rules are: The rules are always changing. You don’t even know how to win the game, at least not at the outset. It starts with the first rule, to draw one card and play one card. From there it gets complicated. Rules are added and changed until you have a whole set of directives, and the criteria for winning can shift at any time. “What?” you might be thinking. It’s even more confusing when you play it. But the lack of monotony keeps the game lively. Monster Fluxx, rife with zombies, vampires, skeletons, Bigfoot and an angry mob of villagers, is the newest version of the Fluxx games. There’s also Cthulhu Fluxx, Oz Fluxx, Star Fluxx, Pirate Fluxx, Monty Python Fluxx, Family Fluxx and Eco Fluxx. So you’re guaranteed to find a version that fits your gift recipient’s personality — as long as he or she isn’t afraid of change.

Holiday

Heroes

Community Blood Drive

The need for blood doesn’t take a holiday!

Ensure blood is available when pateints need it. Give blood at INBC’s Holiday Heroes Blood Drive and enter to win a staycation for 4 to a local ski & waterpark!

Mon., Dec. 16* through Tues., Dec. 31*

*Hours and Days Vary. Special hours! All locations are CLOSED 12/25 & 1/1.

• Spokane: 210 W Cataldo Ave. • Coeur d’Alene: 405 W Neider Ave. • Lewiston: 1213 21st Street • Spokane Valley: Valley Hospital • Moses Lake: Samaritan Healthcare • Moscow: Gritman Medical Center • Pullman: Pullman Regional Hospital • Mobile Blood Drive Locations throughout our community

34 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

from the wino to the train geek on your list

SPOT IT! PARTY

BY JO MILLER

It’s a simple game of finding matching symbols, but add speed and an amusing group of people, and you can end up with a silly mess of fun. Each card has eight symbols — things like cheese, clowns and dolphins — and you have to find which one is on both cards. The game isn’t as elementary-school as you might think. (You remember those days of circling “what doesn’t belong”?) The symbols trick your eye with different sizes and the party version adds elements like mini-games. Best of all, it doesn’t discriminate based on reading level, meaning it’s good for playing with kids or foreign exchange students.

We know how to

Stuff your Stocking! Boo�Radley’s Uncommon�Gifts

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ZOMBIE CRIBBAGE

Tons of things have been zombified as of late: Jane Austen, donuts and romantic comedies, to name three. So why not a 17th century card game? Since it was invented, cribbage has become one of the most popular tabletop games of all time; it’s finally undergone an undead makeover. Blood drips and internal organs hang out of the jack, queen and king in the deck of cards. The spilikins are no longer just boring old pegs, but zombies trudging across a cobblestone scoreboard. It’s doubtful that cribbage would help much in the event of a real zombie apocalypse, but you never know. A zombie might take a liking to it and play a few hands with you before gnawing on your flesh.

PANDEMIC

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Godzilla tried it. Now you can choose to be an alien, giant robot or mutant monster and battle other beasts while destroying and conquering Tokyo. The game works by throwing dice and choosing whether to gain victory points, energy, health or choosing to attack another player. You can also draw cards that give you special powers like a nova death ray or growing a second head. King of Tokyo is a good game for mixed ages. Buy this game for a family with pent-up anger towards each other. It could be a cathartic experience for everyone to get to bare their inner monster.

VITICULTURE

If you weren’t born into a vineyard-owning Italian family but you wish you had been, here’s your chance. In this “strategic game of winemaking,” — yes, a winemaking board game — each player has inherited small vineyards in pre-modern rural Tuscany. With only a few supplies and workers, each player tries to expand his or her vineyard by gaining workers and visitors, planting vines, building and selling wine. The most successful winery wins. Be sure to include a bottle or two of wine with this gift. It wouldn’t be fair for someone to work so hard on a vineyard and never drink the benefits. n

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GRE PREP COURSE 36 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

CONTINUES AFTER SNOWLANDER PULL-OUT

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FOR MORE INFO, CALL 509.828.1232

SUPPLEMENT TO THE INLANDER

12 13

powder dreams SCHWEITZER TURNS 50 4 | GIFTS FOR THE SKIIER ON YOUR LIST 6 | ROADTRIPPING WITH KIDS 8

$87

2 INLANDER DECEMBER 2013

per person plus tax

Weekend packages start at $87 per person, per night. Based on 4 person occupancy in a deluxe studio and includes 2 adult and 2 youth lift tickets and unlimited access to Idaho’s largest indoor waterpark!

EDITOR’S NOTE

THINGS ARE HEATING UP!

W

ho would have guessed that winter would kick off with a vengeance? The first couple of weekends offered just enough vertical to get those ski legs woken up. Then out of nowhere, Ullr blessed us with a Dec. 1 powder day! Unexpected, well-deserved and very much appreciated, face shots were welcomed run after run, followed up by big smiles and sore legs — the good news is, our first powder day is in the books! Mother Nature also shocked our bodies with a cold snap that seemed to last for weeks, building our tolerance for cold winter days and mountain temperatures for the rest of the ski season. Skiing and snowboarding is in full swing, and area mountains are ready for you

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GIFT GUIDE

CANADIAN R OA D T R I P

6

8

WINTER BEERS 10 SKI LESSONS

11

LOCAL EVENTS 12 THE LAST RUN 13

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to get up on the hill this winter. As the Christmas holiday nears, event calendars get busier, so check out our listings (p. 12) to see what is going on at a mountain near you. Nationwide, January is Learn to Ski and Snowboard Month, and the region’s ski resorts have a plethora of programs designed for those who never have skied before. We’ve had the chance to talk to our five local resorts about programs, training and resources available for those who want to try out or return to the sport of skiing or snowboarding this season (p. 11). Wishing all you skiers and snowboarders a great holiday season — may Santa bring you many powder days, filled with sunshine, while surrounded by friends. Cheers to a great season ahead!

509.534.4554 | South 2925 Regal | www.SpokaneAlpineHaus.com

— JEN FORSYTH Snowlander Editor P.S.: Santa, if you’re wondering what to get to me this season, powder days are always nice, but there’s also a comprehensive list in the Gift Guide (p. 6).

E X P E R T A DV I C E 14

DECEMBER 2013 SNOWLANDER 3

NEWS AND NOTES

A photo of Schweitzer from its 1963 opening.

ROSS HALL/HALLANS GALLERY PHOTO

4 INLANDER DECEMBER 2013

SCHWEITZER MOUNTAIN RESORT TURNS 50 Opening in the winter of 1963 in the Idaho panhandle, Schweitzer Mountain Resort celebrates half a century in business this month. “Schweitzer has really grown up in the past 50 years, especially in the past 15 when we transformed from a ski area to a resort,” says resort marketing manager Sean Briggs. While people had been skiing the mountainous terrain just north of Sandpoint since the early 1930s, it

wasn’t until a group of entrepreneurs — Jack Fowler, Grant Groesbeck, Sam Wormington and Jim Brown — saw a golden business opportunity in the making that the ski area was conceptualized. It began as Schweitzer Basin. In honor of the milestone, Schweitzer held a series of parties and discounted lift tickets for Founder’s Day weekend, Dec. 13-15. In addition, a 25-year-old time capsule, which ski patrol buried by the Snow Ghost chairlift,

was cracked open. “We are so thankful for our guests who have supported us year after year,” Briggs says. “It feels great to be celebrating this event with all of them.” Skiers who first traversed the place 50 years ago paid $4 for a daily lift ticket. Today that runs $71. Briggs says Schweitzer’s 50th anniversary festivities will last all season long. — LAURA JOHNSON

THE UNPREDICTABLE FORECAST This year, forecasters have little to go on for the months of December, January and February, says John Livingston, with the National Weather Service. “These are large-scale forecasts for large periods of time,” Livingston says, cautioning against drawing too many conclusions. “It’ll be a near-normal winter. There will be snow in the mountains. Winter will pay us a visit.” Over at Lookout Pass (pictured) near the IdahoMontana border, things are more optimistic. Chris Barrett, Lookout’s marketing director, says even before the first flake of snow, he was seeing signs of a strong winter. “We were seeing a lot of yellow jackets in the summertime,” Barrett says. “Animals were shedding early. That’s a good sign as well.” Last week, it snowed 11 inches at Lookout in just four days. “It looks like it’s going to be a promising, 400-plus

inch season,” Barrett says. “The Farmers’ Almanac is saying we’re going to have a good season this year, [but] the proof is in the actual pudding.” While intense cold from early December’s arctic blast didn’t resulted in new snowfall, it preserved the existing snow. What little moisture evaporated almost instantly returned to the surface. “It almost re-snows,” Barrett says. “It almost slows down time in the snow.” That’s the thing about the mountains. Places like Lookout Pass have their own microclimates. Even if the overall Northwest climate remains normal, strange and wonderful weather events can happen on the ski slopes. “The dry air from the east and south converges on the resort,” Barrett says. “Just a mile from us, it’ll be raining. [But] it’s snowing at Lookout Pass.” — DANIEL WALTERS

The New

INLANDER MOBILE When is our movie playing? Who has karaoke tonight? What’s happening this weekend? Where is the nearest chinese restaurant?

The answers to life’s great questions. m.inlander.com

DECEMBER 2013 SNOWLANDER 5

GIFT GUIDE 3:30p - 9:30p

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Freeride Media

GIFTS FOR SKIERS

Ideas for the ski bums on your list BY JEN FORSYTH From fashionable to functional

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6 INLANDER DECEMBER 2013

C

USTOM 7B IPHONE CASE, $40, 7B BOARDSHOP, SANDPOINT (A): Show your 7B love while protecting your iPhone. These stylish genuine-wood skins are available in lighter- and darker-grain wood, with options of the 7B Boardshop logo or a graffiti 7B logo version. Available for your iPhone 4s or 5. WEWOOD WATCH, $120$135, ALPINE SHOP, SANDPOINT (B): A stylish piece and a nice complement for any outdoorsman’s accessory collection. These watches come in a variety of styles for both men and women and offer six natural shades: Red Wing Celtis (brown), Blackwood (black), Reclaimed Teak (teak), Maple (beige), Guaiaco (army green) and Indian Rosewood (chocolate). With each watch purchase, a tree is planted in the U.S. by American Forests. WT-66 BINDING 4-PACK BY SHOTZ SKI, $95, SHOTZSKI. COM (C): You’ve seen these in action at your favorite ski bar and Pray for Snow parties all over the Inland Northwest. Now owning one is more of a (financial) reality. The newly released self-install 4-pack system includes four boots, WT-66 bindings and instructions

on how to mount these bad boys to your favorite ski collecting dust in your garage. Bindings are available in black, yellow, white, red, orange and green. SKHOOP SKIRTS, PRICE VARIES BASED ON STYLE, ESCAPE OUTDOORS, COEUR D’ALENE (D): Skhoop skirts are at it again, adding to their distinguished line of apparel for the mountain ladies in your life. The down skirts have been a winter favorite to throw on after a day on the slopes, or just to run to the grocery store on a cold, blustery day. Now they offer a wool version to add to your winter wardrobe. SMITH I/O GOGGLES, $175, WINTERSPORT, SPOKANE (E): Want to experience goggle love? Add a pair of Smith goggles to your Christmas list. Available in a variety of color combinations, these goggles come with two lenses, one for low light and one for sunny days. For smaller faces, check out the I/OS; for glasses-compatible or larger faces, the I/OX will do the job. ARCADE BELTS, $24-$32, ARCADEBELTS.COM (F): Customize your look by adding a stylish Arcade Belt to your ski wardrobe. Available in

Call or Order Online Today! (d)

(g)

(f) (c)

a variety of styles and colors, these mountain-inspired belts will add distinction to ski pants, jeans or fly-fishing waders. My personal favorite? The Pacific. BEERACUDA BY BURTON, $20, SKI SHACK, HAYDEN (G): The Beeracuda can be used year-round and for a variety of adventures. This over-theshoulder beer holder easily houses a six-pack of your favorite canned brew in a vertical insulated sleeve and features a koozie-enhanced shoulder strap. Available in two patterns: Duck Hunter Camo and Revelstoke. LANGE HEATED BOOT BAG, $200, ALPINE HAUS, SPOKANE (H): Tired of showing up to the hill and slipping on a pair of cold boots? Add a heated boot bag to your arsenal and discover the wonderful world of toasty toes. It’s 220V and 12DC charging-compatible. After your first time arriving

to the first chair with warm feet, you’ll never want to leave home without it. DAKINE DELUXE SKI AND SNOWBOARD TUNING KIT, $60, THE SPORTS CREEL, SPOKANE (I): This set includes everything skiers and snowboarders will need to keep their boards in the best shape possible throughout the season. Kit includes files, stones, scrapers, wax, case and much more. Whiskey for sipping while working on boards not included. GIRLS’ MARMOT INCOG HAT, $30, MOUNTAIN GEAR, SPOKANE (J): Even the little ladies in our lives need accessory pieces that show they have mountain style and attitude. This beanie comes in deep purple or pop pink and features a cool crochet pattern and a front bill. Good for getting to and from the mountain, or for building that first snowman of the season in the backyard. 

GIFT CARDS! 6 PACKS! MAKE GREAT GIFTS.

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• 2,325 Acres • 7 Lifts • 82 Trails 509.935.6649 • ski49n.com DECEMBER 2013 SNOWLANDER 7

GETAWAY

POWDER TRIP Cat skiing in B.C. + a half-dozen teenagers = an unforgettable day on the slopes BY BOB LEGASA Scenes from our “Kids’ Road Trip.” BOB LEGASA PHOTOS

8 INLANDER DECEMBER 2013

B

ack in the late ’70s, the movie Animal House hit the big screen. Plenty of classic lines came from that movie. One scene that stands out is when Dean Wormer shut down Delta House and the Delta boys had one way to get over their problem: “Road Trip!” Now imagine getting together a group of kids 12 to 17 years old, and taking them not only on their first skiing road trip, but capping it off with a day of deep powder cat-skiing with Big Red Cats. I travel the legendary Powder Highway in Canada with my good friend Tommy Frey every year on a 10-day powder-skiing road trip. We always come home with fun stories, and our kids have grown up watching the videos of all the fun that takes place on these adventures. Every year they ask “When can we go on the road trip?” It finally happened last December. We were having a discussion with Paula Gaul from Big Red Cats in Rossland, B.C.; she had mentioned their cat-skiing operation now includes kids 12

and older. The wheels started turning and the plan was laid out: “Kids’ Road Trip!” A few phone calls later, we were on track with six friends, ranging from 12 to 17, who have known each other for years. Sandpoint’s Jeff Cates said his 14-year-old stepson Michael Plaster was consumed with going: “Michael kept telling all of his friends at school what he was getting to do. He had it scheduled into his phone; that’s all he could talk about. He was very, very excited to go.” We decided we would start the kids off with a day at Whitewater Ski Resort outside the funky ski town of Nelson, B.C. In 2012, Nelson was voted by the readers of Powder magazine as the No. 1 ski town in North America in their “Ski Town Throwdown” competition. What better place then Nelson to start immersing kids into the ski culture. On Friday, Feb. 8, our day started with a spectacular drive up the canyon to Whitewater. The kids were in awe. “Humongous” is not a word you hear every day, but apparently

Michael likes to use it. We were all taken in by the beauty of these spectacular mountains, cast against the bluebird skies. It doesn’t get much better than this when you’re going riding. It was a crisp, clear morning and with temps in the low teens, we were looking to start our day somewhere in the sun. Behind the Summit Chair the sun was cresting, making our decision to start there a no-brainer. We hot-lapped highspeed groomed runs on Bonanza and Motherlode in the sun and ventured around a little. Directly under the Summit Chair, we found a run with big, soft bumps that was calling our name. Having the kids ski the “Hollywood” Line directly under the chairlift was a fun way to put a little pressure on them; the kids had to be on their “A game” and ski under the watchful eye of a very vocal audience. Next we were off to the Terrain Park, which siblings JoJo and JJ Jaeger had their eyes on from the minute we arrived. Whitewater does a fabulous job with their Terrain Park; there are plenty of features and a good flow. It was a great

place for the kids to have some fun, doing what kids love to do: jump! The kids sessioned the park for the remainder of the morning. Then it was time to refuel. Whitewater is famous for more than their skiing. Fresh Tracks Cafe in the lodge doesn’t serve your normal lodge food. With choices like the Wildhorse Curry Bowl and Chai BBQ Pulled Pork Panini, you know you’re in for a culinary treat. The hands-down favorite with this young crew was the good old Canadian standby of Poutine and fries. My mouth is watering just thinking about it. After lunch, we took the kids over to Whitewater’s newly expanded Glory Ridge Chair, where they finished off the remainder of their day. Even with the five-year age difference in the group, it was nice seeing them all skiing together, having a great time. Downtown Nelson has lots of incredible food choices, but all these kids wanted was pizza and some time at the indoor hotel pool. Who can argue with that? After all, tomorrow was going to be a big day for this crew.

After the 411 on safety and protocol, we loaded up the cat and headed up to the zone where we’d spend our day skiing. As we crested the top of the ridge, Kieren pointed out the run we’d be skiing. The “stoked” level was at an all-time high for these kids; they could hardly contain themselves. As we unloaded the cat and stepped into our gear, Kieren’s tail guide Natasha Lockey dug a snow pit to assess snow-pack stability. As suspected, conditions were perfect. It was going to be an epic first day for these kids. The group followed Kieren as we slid out in single-file formation to a group of trees, a safe zone just before the opening in the basin. We’d post up here, waiting our turns. Kieren gave us a few words of encouragement, then skied down to check snow quality and get in position at the bottom of the first pitch. He made it look so effortless. He radioed back up to Natasha: “It’s perfect. Send ’em, one at a time.” After months of anxiousness, it was now go time. Justin Meredith, 17, from Coeur d’Alene, was the first to go. He slid his snowboard into position, then dropped into his line, carving all the way down to Kieren a few hundred yards below. You could hear Justin hooting and hollering Five am wakeup call, gear loaded in the rigs and the whole way. Natasha stood at the top, saying, on the road by 6 for the hour drive to Rossland, “That’s the way it’s done!” B.C., home to Big Red Cats. The drive was an Each kid made their first cat-skiing powder interesting one: These kids aren’t run, and as they reached the bottom you morning people, and there was could sense a huge burden lifted off their a little nervousness and anxiety shoulders; each had overcome something Bigredcats.com about their first cat-skiing adventhey were nervous about. Skiwhitewater.com ture. Justin says, “I was a little scared and Powderhighway.com Owners Kieren and Paula intimated at first, but the excitement Nelsonkootenaylake.com Gaul purchased Big Red Cats back kicked in when I got here. It turned out in 2004. They have expanded to be easy and really fun. It was really their operation by offering up to four different cool.” snowcats in their 19,800-acre terrain. Each cat It’s just as rewarding for Kieren: carries riders of similar abilities, making your cat“It’s just wonderful to see, when their face skiing experience an enjoyable one. starts to light up, when they start to get it. You “We can take up to 12 people out in each cat can see that transition, that spark hits their eyes, and we offer different levels; we do intermedialmost like fire. The excitement, that’s what I like ate, advanced, expert, and uber expert, which to see.” is jumping off cliffs all day,” says Kieren, a lead With a few runs under their belts and an guide with the operation. ever-increasing confidence level, it was time to One of BRC’s additions was introducing have some fun in the powder. Cooper, 14, and younger riders to cat skiing. Justine were all about boosting airs off everything “Kids can come out cat skiing with us at 12 into the powder. My daughter Hannah Legasa years and older; they need to come out with was like a kid in a candy store, getting as much a parent or a guardian,” says Kieren, whose fresh pow as she could. 12-year-old daughter Sammie was along on this “It was fun to hit the jumps because when adventure. “It’s a ton of fun when the teenagers you landed, the snow was so soft and it shot up in come out. They’ll start off in the intermediate or your face. It was awesome,” says Cooper Herby. advanced, and sometimes expert group.” The beauty of cat skiing: You get short “This is a huge experience for the kids. They 15-to-20-minute rests between runs as you make get to see what the big mountains and the Monayour way back up in the cat, just enough time shees are all about,” says Tommy, there with his to recharge and refuel for the next run. With 15-year-old Sydney. “I’ve been listening to Sydney conditions at their best, the kids charged hard all for months since we started planning this thing. day long. “These kids got to experience a huge She’s just a little excited.” day of skiing in fresh powder and sunshine,” After a short transceiver training clinic put says Tommy, “but the best thing about it for us on by Big Red Cats’ certified mountain guides, it parents? When they got home, they were all was time to head up to the high country. Kieren exhausted and in bed, sound asleep before their informed us that after a foot of new snow a few heads even hit the pillow.” days ago and with consistent cold temps, skiing I’d say these kids are hooked now. I’m sure was ranking a 10 on the fun meter. These type of they’ll be back, bringing back their ski buddies. conditions, with boot-top snow, are perfect for the Kieren has a pretty good business model. As a first timer, making it an ideal learning situation — parent, this was a dream come true; my daughter just deep enough to get the powder sensation and was able to experience something we are both so build up your skill and confidence. passionate about. I feel like I’ve passed the torch. 

these are the good old days.

THE BIG DAY

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DECEMBER 2013 SNOWLANDER 9

BEER turn of Laughing Dog’s Dogfather, an imperial stout aged in charred bourbon barrels. It’s available in 22-oz. bottles — and at 10 percent alcohol by volume, it might be one to drink once you’re safely at home just steps from your bed. Though not strictly a winter seasonal, another cold-weather favorite is the Anubis Imperial Coffee Porter, also available in 22-oz. bottles.

WALLACE BREWING

With an annual average snowfall of nearly 50 inches, the historic mining town of Wallace knows a thing or two about winter. The Winter Ale from Wallace Brewing takes its warming role seriously, at 8 percent alcohol by volume. The caramel maltiness has hints of candy apple and toasted marshmallow. If you’re not making it to Wallace any time before the snow starts melting, this beer has also been spotted on Spokane-area tap lists recently.

PARADISE CREEK BREWERY

WINTER SIPS Unwind with seasonal stouts and winter warmers from the region’s breweries BY LISA WAANANEN Sustenance between downhill runs YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

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ith the wind chills far below freezing, it’s hard to argue with a mug of hot cocoa or bourbon cider beside the fireplace. But it’s also the season for stouts, winter warmers and other beers that pair best with a thick snowpack. Unwind after a day on the slopes

by stopping by one of the breweries in the region, or sipping their brews at regional bars and restaurants. Here are a few to try before the season’s over:

LAUGHING DOG BREWING

Winter in Sandpoint means the re-

In Pullman, Paradise Creek Brewery released several dark, rich beers just for the winter season. They made a limited-edition Peppermint Porter for a s’mores bonfire holiday event, if you’re lucky enough to stop by before they run out. But they’ve got two other seasonals to try: Stocking Stuffer, an imperial stout, and Lupular Fallout, an imperial black IPA released last week. Paradise Creek bottles some of their standards, but you’ll only find these beers on tap. If you’re looking for a snack to go with your pint, general manager Scott Mackey suggests the grilled cheese with peppered bacon, Cougar Gold and smoked cheddar.

HOPPED UP BREWING

It’s the first winter in operation for Hopped Up Brewing in Spokane

Valley, but owner and brewer Steve Ewan hasn’t wasted time getting into seasonals and rotating brews. The robust, malty Destroy My Sweater ale — which gets its name from the brewery’s Ugly Sweater Party — is brewed with spruce tips instead of hops for a subtle wintry flavor. If you’re already getting tired of dark beers by this point in the season, keep an eye out for a limited-edition huckleberry cream ale coming to one of the rotating taps.

NO-LI

No-Li’s Winter Warmer is a flavorful alternative to the season’s stouts and porters. A ruby-colored strong ale, the 2013 version has spicy notes from the hops without the heavy spiced flavor that’s often in fall and winter seasonals. Most local grocery stores have started stocking the 22-oz. bottles, making this a perfect winter brew to pick up on the way home on those nights when you need to rest up before another early start. Also keep an eye out for No-Li’s next offering in the Expo Series — the Skyrail IPA, a single-hop seasonal released on Dec. 24 as a convenient mood lifter for the days following Christmas.

ICICLE BREWING CO.

If you’re traveling through Leavenworth during a trip to the Cascades, stop by Icicle Brewing Co. Dark Persuasion German Chocolate Cake Ale, a porter with hints of coconut, was a favorite at regional beer festivals last winter. Plenty of fans were eagerly waiting when this year’s first keg was tapped on Dec. 1. Another experimental seasonal coming at the beginning of 2014 is Strictly Business, a dark-roasted pale ale. 

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10 INLANDER DECEMBER 2013

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SKI LESSONS

GETTING STARTED Skiing is a lifestyle, and it’s never too early to learn BY JEN FORSYTH Local mountains offer programs for various skill levels.

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ookout Pass Ski and Recreation Area offers a great program and cool graduation presents for those new to the sport of skiing or snowboarding. For $99, the EZ Ski & Ride 1-2-3 gives participants an incentive to come up to Lookout and try it out. Beginners get three lessons, including rentals and lift tickets. Upon completion of the three lessons? “A free season pass for the rest of the season after you graduate,” says Chris Barrett, marketing and winter sports school director. This program and deal is only available for those brand-new to the sport. It’s available for those ages 13 and up every day Lookout is open, and for ages 7-12 on weekends only. Silver Mountain Resort boasts one of the longest Magic Carpets in the region, conveniently located 50 feet from the Mountain House and viewable from the patio. “You can see all the way down the bunny hill from the patio,” says Willy Bartlett, Silver’s marketing coordinator. The Magic Carpet is an easy lift for beginners; there’s

no riding off the chairlift, just stepping from the snow onto the moving carpet that takes you back to the top of the run. “The biggest difference for us at Silver is the accessibility of tubing and the water park to the ski resort,” Bartlett says. “So as a beginner, you have a variety of activities in addition to skiing.” At Schweitzer Mountain Resort, beginners looking to explore skiing and snowboarding will find a long list of full-time, PSIA/AASI instructors available seven days a week throughout the entire season. In addition to the passionate and qualified staff, there are several options for the skiing or snowboarding newbie. This January, Schweitzer will celebrate Learn to Ski Month by offering a special learning package just for beginners. It’s a one-day program that includes lift ticket, lesson and rental for $39. The next two lessons are at a discounted rate of $60 per day, and after completion of this three-day program, you receive a season pass, valid from

mid-March through season’s end. “This is different than the EZ Ski & Ride 1-2-3 program, as it’s per day. You pay as you go,” says Terry McLeod, Schweitzer’s snowsports school director. 49° North wants your kid to love the mountain as much as you do, and it’s excited about offering programs for kids of all ages. Rick Brown, director of skiing & snowboarding at 49°, cites the program “Mommy & Me/Daddy & Me”: “These lessons include the parent, as we teach them skills to work with the child after the lesson is over.” This program is available for kids 2 and up and for one or both parents. Additionally, 49° has an entire fleet of new boards and upgraded rental equipment. “We are really excited about these upgrades,” Brown says, “as the new tools will allow newbies to be successful and make them want to come back.” At Mt. Spokane Ski & Snowboard Park, even the smallest shredders can get started early with the Learn to Ride program. Mt. Spokane is a certified Burton Learn to Ride Center. “In addition to providing Burton gear, which has been engineered specifically for new riders, our coaches also focus on progression in a fun, safe environment,” says Kristin Whitaker, mountain services and marketing manager. “What’s cool about the Burton LTR gear, and sets it apart from other learning systems, is that very young kids can now get started snowboarding as early as 3 or 4 years old.” The mountain has developed a video series — available for viewing on their website — on different subject matters, including getting to the mountain, what to do once you’re there, mountain learning center information and even a survival guide to skiing in the rain. n

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long weekend deal DECEMBER 2013 SNOWLANDER 11

WINTER EVENTS AVALANCHE AWARENESS COURSE Learn the indicators of an avalanche as well as survival and digging methods in this one-day introductory course on Dec. 29. $35. Whitewater Ski Resort, 601 Front St., Nelson, B.C. skiwhitewater.com

LIGHT UP THE NIGHT

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s you pack up the skis/boards and the whole family for an evening of night skiing at Chewelah’s 49 Degrees North, don’t forget the food donations, too. The resort’s first of four evenings of night-skiing opportunities happens the weekend after Christmas. Not only is it an ideal family bonding activity that can be easily coordinated after a slow Saturday morning at home, it’s affordable and is all for a good cause. Each night skiing event (upcoming dates: Jan. 4 and 18; Feb. 15) functions as a food drive benefiting Second Harvest Food Bank. Attendees are offered $4 lift tickets for the night in exchange for a minimum of two nonperishable food items (per person). Otherwise, lift tickets are $15. Several runs and two chair lifts are open for the event, which features the mountain aglow in soft orange light. Resort marketing director Sherry Brewer says last year’s night skiing food drives brought in about two and a half tons of food. Warm in the lodge after a few runs, where families can take advantage of food specials as they enjoy live music by classic blues/rock band the Rebellious Moles (2-6 pm). — CHEY SCOTT Night Skiing Food Drive • Dec. 28 from 3:30-8 pm • $4 lift tickets with min. two food items; $15 without • 49 Degrees North Mountain Resort • 3311 Flowery Trail Rd., Chewelah • ski49.com • 935-6649

DECEMBER NIGHT SKIING KICKOFF PARTY Bringing the first night-skiing event of the season in with a bang, the mountain will be aglow in lights and everyone will get a chance to win some sweet swag. Dec. 20. Mt. Spokane Ski and Snowboard Park, 29500 N. Mt. Spokane Park Dr., Mead, Wash. mtspokane.com (238-2220) SANTAS SKI FREE The first 30 skiers and riders to the Village in full Santa or Mrs. Claus attire get free lift tickets. Then the whole group of Santas rides down the mountain for a group photo. Dec. 21 at 9 am. Big White Ski Resort, 5315 Big White Rd., Kelowna, B.C. bigwhite.com (250-765-3101) FREERIDERS CAMP Children (ages 10 and older) are invited to ride with the pros and play in the terrain parks in daily camps held from Dec. 21-23. Lookout Pass, I-90, Mullan, Idaho. skilookout.com (208-744-1301) CHRISTMAS ON THE MOUNTAIN Attend the torchlight parade, kids activities including the chance to meet Santa himself, as well as live music in the lodge. Dec. 21. Mission Ridge Ski & Board Resort, 7500 Mission Ridge Rd., Wenatchee, Wash. missionridge.com CHRISTMAS AT SILVER MOUNTAIN It you’re celebrating the holidays on the mountain, keep an eye out for the jolly old elf himself on the slopes. Dec 24-25. Silver Mountain Resort, 610 Bunker Ave.

12 INLANDER DECEMBER 2013

Kellogg, Idaho. silvermt.com CHRISTMAS BUFFET Enjoy a traditional holiday feast on Dec. 25 from 11 am-2 pm. Lookout Pass, I-90, Mullan, Idaho. skilookout.com NIGHT SKIING AND ZIPLINING Shoot down the slopes and fly through the crisp, night time winter air during this special holiday event. Dec. 26-Jan. 4 from 4-9 pm each night. Fernie Alpine Resort, 5339 Ski Hill Rd., Fernie, B.C. skifernie. com (250-423-4655) CRUISE THE BLUES Head up to the mountain and ski all the intermediate “blue” (intermediate/ advanced skiers and riders) runs to win prizes on Dec. 28. Whitefish Mountain Resort, 3889 Big Mountain Rd., Whitefish, Mont. skiwhitefish.com (406-862-2900) MOUNTAIN MUSIC FESTIVAL The annual series kicks off with a concert in the lodge and night skiing on the slope, with concerts and night skiing to follow every Saturday. Dec. 28 through Feb. 22, Saturdays from 4-8 pm. Mission Ridge Ski & Board Resort, 7500 Mission Ridge Rd., Wenatchee, Wash. missionridge.com SILVER STAR RAIL JAM The first rail jam of the season is held under the lights, featuring skiers and snowboarders performing jaw-dropping tricks as they compete for prizes. Dec. 28 from 6-8 pm. Price TBA. Silver Star Mountain Resort, 123 Shortt St., Silver Star Mountain, B.C. skisilverstar.com (800-663-4431)

GREAT SCOTT CROSS COUNTRY RACES The annual event returns, where relay teams take to the mountain on their snow implement of choice: skis, snowshoes or snowbikes. Dec. 29. Schweitzer Mountain Resort, 10000 Schweitzer Mountain Rd., Sandpoint. schweitzer.com AVALANCHE AWARENESS CLASS Learn the signs of danger and how to get to safety. Dec. 29 from 9:30 am-12:30 pm. Mission Ridge Ski & Board Resort, 7500 Mission Ridge Rd., Wenatchee, Wash. missionridge.com (663-6543) NEW YEAR’S PARTY Celebrate and count down to the New Year with your family earlier in the evening with a special NYE dinner, or head to the dance party and countdown to midnight in Noah’s Canteen. Dec. 31. Silver Mountain Resort, 610 Bunker Ave. Kellogg, Idaho. silvermt.com NEW YEAR’S EVE PARTY There are parties for all ages, including a tubing party, “tween” party and a countdown with live music all night at Taps bar. Dec. 31. Schweitzer Mountain Resort, 10000 Schweitzer Mountain Rd., Sandpoint. schweitzer.com

JANUARY JACKASS DAY Celebrate the mountain’s 45th birthday and humble beginnings with a party at Noah’s Loft featuring ski and board movies, games and more on Jan. 10. Silver Mountain Resort, 610 Bunker Ave. Kellogg, Idaho. silvermt.com DOWNHILL DIVAS A women-only ski program with the mountain’s top female instructors, intended to spark camaraderie while focusing skiing skills, starts on Jan. 10, and takes place on Fridays from 9:30 am to noon through March 21. $35/session or $90 for three sessions. Lookout Pass, I-90, Mullan, Idaho. skilookout.com YOUTH SKI RACES Hosted by the Spokane Ski Race Association (SSRA) and Mt. Spokane, the Emerald Empire Youth Ski League Races take place Jan. 11-12. $19-$38 entry fee, lift tickets $24. Mt. Spokane Ski and Snowboard Park, 29500 N. Mt. Spokane Park Dr., Mead. gossra.org (863-7608) WINTER TRAILS DAY The Snowsports Industries of America Winter Trails Day gives kids and adults the chance to try out snowshoeing and cross-country skiing by offering free access to trails and hosted snowshoe hikes. Jan. 11. Schweitzer Mountain Resort, 10000 Schweitzer Mountain Rd., Sandpoint. schweitzer.com (208-2639555) FUN AND FEMALE SNOWSHOE PROGRAM A ladies-only snowshoe adventure through the pristine B.C. mountains, led by the mountain’s female staff members, is a great introduction to the low-impact sport of snowshoeing. Jan. 11, 18 and 25 from 3-4:30 pm. $59 per person. Silver Star Mountain Resort, 123 Shortt St.,

Silver Star Mountain, B.C. skisilverstar. com (800-663-4431) FREE SKI SCHOOL Register early for Lookout’s popular free ski school program for kids (ages 6-17), which takes place every Saturday from Jan. 11 through March 15. Beginners from 10-11:15 am, intermediate from 11:30 am12:45 pm. Lookout Pass, I-90, Mullan, Idaho. skilookout.com (208-744-1301) NAT’L LEARN TO SKI & SNOWBOARD WEEK If learning how to ski or snowboard — or improving the skills you already have — is on your list of things to do this season, check out the weeklong schedule of events from Jan. 12-18. Whitewater Ski Resort, 601 Front St., Nelson, B.C. skiwhitewater.com (250-354-4944) WINTERFEST & DEMO DAY Enjoy the heart of the ski season with a free snowshoe trek through the woods, mini ski lessons, product demos and more from Jan. 11-12. 49° North, 3311 Flowery Trail Rd., Chewelah, Wash. ski49n.com (935-6649) KIDS’ TELEMARK SKI CLINIC Introductory clinic for kids ages 6-14, led by guest instructor Ned Ryerson from Aspen, Colo. Jan. 11 and/or 12, half-day or full-day sessions from 10 am-3 pm. $49$69. 49° North, 3311 Flowery Trail Rd., Chewelah, Wash. ski49n.com (935-6649) LADIES DAY The annual Ladies Day program includes a lift ticket, rentals, continental breakfast, four hours of instruction, lunch, wine and cheese tasting and a end-of-day massage. Jan. 15 from 9 am-4 pm (Again on Feb. 19). $99. Mt. Spokane Ski and Snowboard Park, 29500 N. Mt. Spokane Park Dr., Mead. mtspokane.com MOONLIGHT DINE & SKI Enjoy an evening dinner at the summit before flying back down the mountain. Jan. 18. Time and price TBA. Whitefish Mountain Resort, 3889 Big Mountain Rd., Whitefish, Mont. skiwhitefish.com (406862-2900) NIGHT SKIING FOOD DRIVE One of four night skiing opportunities at 49 this year, featuring lit runs on both upper and lower mountain areas. Bring a couple cans of food to get a lift ticket for only $4. Jan. 18. 49° North, 3311 Flowery Trail Rd., Chewelah, Wash. ski49n.com NORTHERN LIGHTS The mountain comes alive with bursts of color and light during the annual torchlight parade, fireworks show and an after party in the Village. Jan. 19. Schweitzer Mountain Resort, 10000 Schweitzer Mountain Rd., Sandpoint. schweitzer.com (208-263-9555) WINTER CARNIVAL This annual weekend festival includes family fun day and the infamous Pacific Northwest National Wife Carrying Contest. Yes, it’s a real event. Jan. 19. Lookout Pass, I-90, Mullan, Idaho. skilookout.com (208-744-1301) EVERGREEN CUP The Fast Blast ski races are hosted by the Forty-Nine Alpine Ski Team (FAST). Jan. 24-26 at 11 am and 1 pm. 49° North, 3311 Flowery Trail Rd., Chewelah, Wash. ski49n.com (935-6649)

SNOW DREAMS This annual winter deck party has been voted one of the best on the continent. This year, it’s co-hosted by Kokanee. Jan. 25. Fernie Alpine Resort, 5339 Ski Hill Rd., Fernie, B.C. skifernie.com BAVARIAN BREWS/BRATS & MUSIC FEST After a long day on the slopes, relax and refuel with a juicy Bavarian-style bratwurst and a stein as you enjoy live music in the lodge. Jan. 26. Lookout Pass, I-90, Mullan, Idaho. skilookout.com (208-744-1301)

FEBRUARY KAN JAM FREESTYLE FESTIVAL The seventh annual event includes a rail jam, slopestyle and big air contests, open to skiers and snowboarders of all levels who can compete for prizes. Feb. 7-9. Mt. Spokane Ski and Snowboard Park, 29500 N. Mt. Spokane Park Dr., Mead. mtspokane.com (238-2220) GOGGLE PARTY Leave your ski goggles on as a day on the slopes turns into a night in the lodge for a night of drink specials and chances to win prizes at Noah’s Canteen. Feb. 8. Silver Mountain Resort, 610 Bunker Ave. Kellogg, Idaho. silvermt.com (866-3442675) MARDI GRAS FESTIVAL Don’t forget your gold, green and purple beads to wear atop your snow gear as you hit the slopes this weekend. After a day outside, cozy up in the lodge for a night of live music and New Orleansstyle celebrating. Feb. 15-16. Lookout Pass, I-90, Mullan, Idaho. skilookout.com (208-744-1301) FAMILY FESTIVAL The B.C. resort’s annual weekend festival includes ice skating, ski races, karaoke, hockey, s’mores parties and more. Feb. 15-16. Kimberley Alpine Resort, 301 North Star Blvd., Kimberley, B.C. skikimberley. com (250-427-4881) LADIES DAY The annual Ladies Day program includes a lift ticket, rentals, continental breakfast, four hours of instruction, lunch, wine and cheese tasting and a end-of-day massage. Feb. 19 from 9 am-4 pm. $99. Mt. Spokane Ski and Snowboard Park, 29500 N. Mt. Spokane Park Dr., Mead. mtspokane.com (238-2220, x215) HOPE ON THE SLOPES The team and individual skiing fundraiser event returns again this year. Participants are encouraged to compete with others in dollars raised and vertical feet skied, with all funds donated to the American Cancer Society. Feb. 22 from 9 am-4 pm. $20 lift ticket for all participants. Mt. Spokane Ski and Snowboard Park, 29500 N. Mt. Spokane Park Dr., Mead, Wash. hopeontheslopes.kintera.org MONTANA POND HOCKEY CLASSIC Inaugural outdoor hockey tournament, featuring four-person teams from Montana and the Pacific Northwest competing over three days of competition. Feb. 21-23. $500/team. Foys Lake, Kalispell, Mont. pondhockeyclassic. com/montana n

MORE EVENTS

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Dec 4

Daanen’s 8049 N. Wayne Dr, Hayden, ID (208) 772-7271

Connie’s Cafe 323 Cedar, Sandpoint, ID (208) 255-2227

Dec 18 Capone’s Pub & Grill 315 N. Ross Point Rd, Post Falls, ID (208) 457-8020

LISTEN FOR DETAILS TBA

Jan 8

LISTEN FOR DETAILS TBA

Capone’s Pub & Grill 4th Street, Coeur d’Alene, ID (208) 667-4843

Jan 15 The Foggy Bottom Lounge Mt Spokane, Spokane, WA (509) 238-2220

LISTEN FOR DETAILS TBA

Jan 22 Waddell’s Neighborhood Pub The Rusty Moose 7211 Main St, Bonners Ferry, ID 4318 S. Regal, Spokane, WA (509) 443-6500 (208) 267-1950 Feb 5

DON’T FORGET!

Even veteran skiers and boarders can fall victim to rookie mistakes BY JEN FORSYTH Rule No. 1: Check your list twice. JIM CAMPBELL ILLUSTRATION

I

’ve been skiing for many years. I find myself comfortably in a routine when it comes to making sure I have everything I need for my day on the hill, but it never ceases to amaze me how easy it is to make one of these rookie mistakes. Just remember, it doesn’t matter how long you’ve been skiing; you will most likely experience one of these rookie mistakes — or create your very own. A friend confessed to me that she was so excited about a powder day, she left her condo, loaded her gear into her car and made her way to the parking lot. She quickly ran up a flight of stairs, hoping to make first chair for yet another great day. She was concerned about how her legs would feel after skiing from first to last chair the day before, but as she ran up the stairs, she thought to herself, “Man, my legs feel great!” She got into the village, threw her skis down, and went to click into her bindings — only to realize the reason her legs felt so good was because she was in her running shoes, not her ski boots. A couple of seasons ago, I was at Lookout Pass on opening day. I got to the parking lot early, loaded the chair with eager skiers and snowboarders. Rode the lift with old winter friends and made new ones, and got wrapped up in the season’s first ski day. At the top of Chair 1, I pulled out my cellphone to take a photo and noticed the time. It was 11 am. I had skied for two hours; I couldn’t believe it! The first day of the season and my legs weren’t

tired at all. All that pre-ski season training had paid off! I was running late for a meeting back home, so I skied to the parking lot, calling my first day a success. I took my boots off, loaded my stuff in the car and made my way to the interstate. Then I realized what had really happened as I read the clock in my car. The time had changed automatically on my phone; adjusting for the Mountain time zone, it was actually only 10 am. You’re amped. It’s your first ski day. You eagerly load up your car, thoroughly check off items on your gear list. You’ve got it all. You make your way up to the ski resort. Go through the painful process of putting your boots on — one of the hardest transitions is from summer flip-flops to rigid ski boots — and make your way to the chairlift. As you throw your skis down, you’re chatting with friends, catching up on summer memories and predictions for the upcoming season. You click your boots into your bindings and push away with your poles, only to find that you’re not gliding. Then it occurs to you: “Summer wax. I seriously forgot to scrape off my summer wax.” A rookie mistake that you can’t blame on your ski tuner. The least favorite — and most common — is standing in line on a powder day and realizing, only when your favorite liftie makes their way down the line to scan your season pass, that you left it at home. You head to the back of the line after you’ve procured a replacement pass for the day. 

The Parkside 6249 W. Maine St, Spirit Lake, ID (208) 623-2799

Trinity at the City Beach 58 Bridge St, Sandpoint, ID (208) 255-7558

Feb 19 Capone’s Pub & Grill 9520 N. Government Way, Hayden, ID (208) 667-4843

219 Lounge 219 N. 1st Ave, Sandpoint, ID (208) 263-5673

Feb 26 The Foggy Bottom Lounge Mt Spokane, Spokane, WA (509) 238-2220

Pend Oreille Winery 301 Cedar St, Sandpoint, ID (208) 265-8545

Mar 8 Boomtown Bar 49 Degrees North, Chewelah, WA (509) 935-6649

Downtown Crossing 206 N. 1st Ave, Sandpoint, ID (208) 610-8820

Mar 19 The Falls Club 611 E. Seltice Way, Post Falls, ID (208) 457-1402

Taps Schweitzer Mountain, Sandpoint, ID (208) 263-9555

This Christmas Eve at Spokane First Presbyterian Contemporary Candlelight Service, 4pm Candlelight Services, 7 & 9pm Candlelight Communion Service, 11pm (childcare offered at 4 and 7) 318 S. Cedar St.

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DECEMBER 2013 SNOWLANDER 13

gear

gear

How to Find & Fit Snowshoes

The Right Snowboard

by: Carla Grieser, Assistant Manager

Shape, sidecut and rocker, which is the best of the best? The advancement of technology in boards seems to be changing weekly, but there are three key points to consider when choosing your next board. 1) Size. Generally the longer you go the more hard-charging and faster the board will be, but as a good rule of size, between your nose and chin is a safe bet. 2) Stiffness. The Stiffer the board the more performance oriented the board is for all mountain riding. The softer the more forgiving and playful the board will be. 3) Rocker. The more rocker (or reverse camber) a board has the more float and off groom riding capabilities you will have at your disposal. There are so many sizes, shapes and rocker variations now so come on in and let our professionals get you in the perfect set up this season.

CONTACT US ADDRESS 2925 S. Regal PHONE 509-534-4554

Snowshoeing is one of the easiest and most enjoyable of winter activities to learn; and it doesn’t require a large investment! Here are a few details to look for in finding and fitting yourself with new snowshoes. The first thing you need to decide is what kind of terrain you’ll be walking on. The more hills, trails, and uneven terrain you’ll be trekking, the more aggressive your snowshoe cleat will need to be. If you plan to be walking on groomed roads or across meadows, you’ll need a less aggressive cleat. As a general rule, the larger the surface area of the snowshoe, the more floatation you’ll achieve on softer snow. This, along with your weight, will influence which snowshoe and binding you’ll need. Most sporting goods stores will have a size chart posted next to their snowshoes. After picking the type of snowshoe you’ll need, you’ll want to place it on a flat, non-slip floor. Loosen the straps and place the ball of your boot over the snowshoes rotation strap/ bar. With your heel centered over the snowshoe, tighten the heel strap around the back of the boot. Then, pull up on the top straps to tighten them over the boot making sure there’s no slack anywhere in the straps. Test your bindings and become familiar with them. If you find your foot is slipping or moving about inside the binding, it’s not fitting correctly. But, if you find the snowshoe stays comfortably and firmly in place, you’re ready to have some CONTACT US fun! Now, get a good set of hiking poles for balance, and PHONE 1-208-772-0613 EMAIL cda@tri-state.com you’re set for an enjoyable winter activity.

WEB www.t-state.com

Finding the Right Helmet Helmets are becoming very popular in today’s world of winter sports. Not only are helmets warm and comfortable to wear while skiing and snowboarding, they can prevent head injuries and even save your life. Follow these tips to find the right helmet for you. • Measure Your Head - Take a soft measuring tape and wrap it around your head about 1 inch above your eyebrows and ears . Most helmets are measured in centimeters, so unless you love calculations, measure your head in centimeters. For example, if you measure the circumference of your head and it is 56cm, you will wear a 56cm helmet or Medium (55-58cm) depending on the helmet’s size scale. • Try It On - Make sure to put the helmet on before you buy it. The helmet should feel snug. A properly fitting helmet needs to be snug all the way around your head so that it doesn’t move around, but not so snug that it causes discomfort or headaches. • Shake Test - With the helmet buckled, shake your head around. If the helmet moves on its own or shakes separately from your head, it’s too big. The helmet pads should be flush against your head with no gaps. A helmet will generally last 2-3 years under ideal conditions. However, a hard fall or other impact can render your helmet useless. Frequently inspect your helmet for cracks, dents, imprints, etc. Don’t take risks. When in doubt, replace your helmet to save yourself trouble or injury.

14 INLANDER DECEMBER 2013

CONTACT US 3311 Flowery Trail Road, Chewelah WA PHONE 509-935-6649 EMAIL ski49n@ski49n.com WEB www.ski49n.com

49 Degrees North December 28th • Night Skiing January 4th • Night Skiing January 11th & 12th • Winterfest

Lookout Pass December 19th • Christmas Holiday begins December 21th-23th • Freeriders Camp December 24th • Here comes Santa January 11th-23th • Free Ski School begins

Mt Spokane December 20th • Night Skiing begins & Tubing Hill opens December 26th • Holiday Camp session 1 December 30th • Holiday Camp session 2 January 15th • Ladies Day

Schweitzer December 24th • Ski with Santa December 28th • Back to the 60’s party December 29th • Great Scott XC Race January 2nd • SARS NW Cup January 3rd-24th • Junior Starlight Series

Silver Mt December 20th-22nd • US Airbag Tour December 24th & 25th • I Spy Santa January 10th • Jackass Day/ 45th Anniversary January 11th • USASA Boarder.Skiercross

DECEMBER 2013 SNOWLANDER 15

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before 12.24.13

Schweitzer’s Gift Cards A great holiday gift idea, Schweitzer’s Gift Cards can be used to purchase lift tickets, food, souvenirs and equipment rentals - anything we sell at resort-owned properties - even lodging!

Ski-in Ski-Out Lodging

4th Night Free Stay 3 nights in the Selkirk Lodge or the White Pine Lodge and your fourth night is on us. *Lowest nightly rate of the four night stay is free. Not available during Holiday Seasons (12/26/13 - 12/31/13) (2/14/14 - 2/16/14)

This event sells out so be sure to get your tickets early!

16 INLANDER DECEMBER 2013

schweitzer.com | 877.487.4643

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from walter white to mary poppins BY JO MILLER SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK

Jennifer Lawrence might not tote around a bow and arrow in this movie, but she’s undoubtedly cool, maybe even cooler than usual. She is Jennifer Lawrence, after all. She makes tripping on the Oscar stairs — on her way to receive her Academy Award for this movie, no less — look cute, being drunk during an interview look classy. She brilliantly portrays the craziness of troubled, widowed Tiffany (alongside Bradley Cooper) in Silver Linings Playbook, though her character would yell at you and throw things to the ground if you called her crazy. Rightly so, maybe. This movie takes an honest look at mental illness, something not many films do. But it’s not all dark. It’s a comedy with a little bit of romance and a lot of awkward conversations.

MARY POPPINS:

50TH ANNIVERSARY EDITION The charming yet stern nanny who can fly with an umbrella and dance with penguins never gets boring. Since the Disney film was first released in 1964, people have been trying to spell supercalifragilisticexpialidocious and can’t help but sing when they fly a kite. In the 50th anniversary edition, the Disney vault is re-releasing the film with a Blu-ray option and digital restoration. Any Mary Poppins fan would be tickled to see the park, the bank and the rooftops of London even brighter and more vibrant. Like Bert says, “Coo, what a sight!”

MONSTERS UNIVERSITY

It’s hard to compile a movie recommendation list without including at least one Pixar movie. Pixar consistently hits the epitome of creative animation, compelling storytelling and that mysterious element that makes a movie utterly delightful for kids and equally as

DECK THE HALLS NOW THRU DEC. 31

entertaining for adults. This prequel to the story about Mike Wazowski and Sulley, the scare team from Monsters Inc., is no exception. We get to see these friends’ collegiate days while they learn everything they can about professional scaring and join with their quirky fraternity friends, Oozma Kappa, to compete in the Scare Games.

STAR TREK INTO DARKNESS

“Khhhhaaaaannnnn!” Oh, that chilling scream from Mr. Spock. Wait, Spock? Wasn’t it Captain Kirk? Oh, right — the voyagers of the Starship Enterprise have entered an alternate universe since the first contemporary Star Trek installment. And Khan is not the graymulleted hippie from the 1982 Wrath of Khan, but instead the dashing Benedict Cumberbatch, with vocal cords of gold. (I suppose those are the kind of things that happen in parallel realities.) If you know anyone who fully understands what was just said in the previous paragraph, buying him or her Star Trek Into Darkness would be a good idea. You might want to check their movie collection first, because they might already have it.

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THE HOBBIT:

AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY When 13 dwarves and a wizard come barging into Bilbo Baggins’ quiet little hobbit hole, you know a great adventure is about to ensue (you know just how great if you’ve read Tolkien’s book). The humble hobbit finds himself in incredible situations with trolls and other dangers as he does his job of burglar for the dwarves set on reclaiming their dragon-guarded treasure. There are familiar faces from the Lord of the Rings trilogy: Gollum (looking a little more moisturized), Gandalf (pretty much the same) and, of course, the ring (it seems so innocent in the prequel). ...continued on next page

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1727 E Sprague Ave 509-535-1111

401 W 1st Ave 509-413-1185

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www.TheHanleyCollection.com

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 37 48750-12 Dec 12-Home for the Holidays-8V.indd 1

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BOY MEETS WORLD:

THE COMPLETE COLLECTION Every ’90s kid knows just how important Boy Meets World is. The romance of Cory and Topanga and the wisdom of Mr. Feeny is nothing to be scoffed at. You can get all seven seasons in this collection and give it to any person in their mid-to-late 20s, making the safe bet that they’re a Boy Meets World fan. It’s important they get it soon and watch every episode. They need to relive the sacred glory before Disney Channel’s new sitcom Girl Meets World (starring Ben Savage and Danielle Fishel, the same Cory and Topanga, now married with two children) comes out next year. The new show could spoil what Boy Meets World once was, or it could add to the greatness. It’s risky.

LIFE OF PI

A boy plus a tiger plus a small boat in the middle of the ocean. That equation seems to equal death for both living parties involved. But for Piscine, aka Pi, and Richard Parker, a Bengal tiger, it means life and an incredible story to go with it. The film is filled with stunning, dreamlike imagery. The scenes with zoo animals out on ocean waters gives it a bizarre feel, but the glowing water and the island swarmed with meerkats make it beautiful. Get this movie for the introspective thinker you know. They’ll spend hours pondering its themes of mortality, faith and the power of storytelling.

BREAKING BAD:

THE COMPLETE SERIES

Walter White, a chemistry teacher, wants to be sure his family will be financially secure when he dies from his inoperable cancer. So he starts cooking meth with the help of a former student, and they’re so good at it that big-time dealers take notice. Crazy ordeals ensue and family challenges arise. Among it all, Breaking Bad became one of the most popular cable shows on American television. The complete series set comes in a replica money barrel and is stuffed with all kinds of fan treasures. There’s a commemorative challenge coin, a 16-page booklet with a letter from writer Vince Gilligan and a Los Pollos Hermanos apron. The DVDs include 55 hours of special features from all the seasons, plus a two-hour documentary. It’s priced around $400, but if you know a big enough fan, their happiness could be worth it. n

38 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

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from ron burgundy to stephen king BY E.J. IANNELLI AND TED S. MCGREGOR JR. THE CRIMSON SPOON

BY JAMIE CALLISON We keep hearing about all those wonderful lentils they’re growing down in the Palouse, and who doesn’t love Cougar Gold cheese? Chef Jamie Callison, who teaches at WSU’s highly regarded School of Hospitality Business Management, has put it all together in one big, beautiful cookbook. It all started when he created a meal for the WSU Board of Governors back in 2012; when he told them all the ingredients were locally sourced, they did what any group generously lubricated with Washington wines would do — they toasted him vigorously and agreed that he simply must write a cookbook! So he did! Linda Burner Augustine — a Coug, of course — helped him perfect his recipes, and now you can put visions of Rainier cherry clafoutis and — of course — Cougar Gold mac and cheese under your Christmas tree this year. (TSM)

LET ME OFF AT THE TOP!

LEGENDS, ICONS AND REBELS

BY ROBBIE ROBERTSON, JIM GUERINOT, SEBASTIAN ROBERTSON & JARED LEVINE Have you ever tried to explain to kids how the music from back in your day was pretty good, too? They kind of wrinkle up their noses and just stare at you before wandering off. “But seriously, have you ever even heard the Beatles…” How can you possibly be losing that argument? Now you can just gift Legends, Icons and Rebels — a book about rock’s roots written just for teens. Pulled together by Robbie Robertson, the lead guitarist for The Band, it’s all about “the original risk-takers.” His team chose 27 artists — from Chuck Berry and Hank Williams to Bob Marley and the Beach Boys — and even include two CDs with a song from each. The highlight, however, is the original artwork — brand-new portraits that each run over two coffee-table-sized pages. When your teenager is done, you’ll want to read it too. (TSM)

BY RON BURGUNDY In the proud American literary tradition of The Great Gatsby and I Am America (And So Can You!), Ron Burgundy has (finally) written his memoir. If you’ve been wondering how he single-handedly destroyed Iceland’s economy, or jilted Barbara Walters (oh, he dishes), or how he went mano a mano with Norman Mailer, this is your book. As America’s favorite news anchor put it at a signing in L.A. recently, “I’m not gonna lie to you: This is a very important book from an important man.” Go ahead — just give it to yourself this year. Read it over a tall glass of Great Odin’s Raven scotch — the official elixir of Ron Burgundy. (Note: This is true — there is a trademarked Ron Burgundy scotch.) Haters might say Ron Burgundy is overexposed; to that, he would no doubt say, “Thank you, I know!” (TSM)

THE GOLDFINCH BY DONNA TARTT

EMPTY MANSIONS

JOYLAND BY STEPHEN KING

BY BILL DEDMAN & PAUL CLARK NEWELL JR. If you’ve ever been to Butte, you’ve heard of William Clark, the mining magnate who built that town — and pulled millions in copper out from under it. So whatever happened to all that money? Journalist Bill Dedman found out as he came across a huge Connecticut mansion that had just gone up for sale after being unoccupied for six decades. The clues led to Huguette Clark, William’s daughter, a contested $300 million inheritance, and two more palatial homes in California and New York. Huguette died in 2011 at the age of 104, and her life story spans everything from the Titanic to 9/11. Written with the help of Paul Clark Newell Jr., her cousin, the New York Times said Dedman “stumbled onto an amazing story of profligate wealth, one so wild that ‘American aspiration’ doesn’t begin to describe its excesses.” (TSM)

When Donna Tartt publishes a book, it’s kind of a big deal. It’s been 11 years since The Little Friend, and although it was first slated to come out in 2008, The Goldfinch finally hit stores this fall. You can see what took her so long — 700-plus pages, all vividly detailing the disparate worlds of the Dutch masters and organized crime bosses. To take it up a notch, Tartt writes the whole thing from a boy’s perspective. (And they say men writing from a women’s point of view is tough!) The plot hinges on a 350-year-old painting by semi-forgotten Carel Fabritius, The Goldfinch — the final link to young Theo Decker’s shattered family. Protecting and pursuing it takes Decker from New York, in a kind of Holden Caulfield-esque tour of the city, to Las Vegas and then Amsterdam. This is a wild ride of a novel that’s sure to win big awards. (TSM)

It’s well known that Stephen King was never a big fan of the film version of The Shining. So this year he’s out with the last word on the matter in Doctor Sleep, the sequel to The Shining. It debuted on top of the bestseller lists. But a lot of King fans are loving Joyland, the quickie book released earlier this year, wrapped in a super-cool, pulp-fiction-y package under the Hard Case Crime imprint. It’s a coming-of-age story at a North Carolina amusement park, circa 1973 — about the time King would have been coming of age himself. Of course there’s a ghost in the Haunted House and a serial killer on the loose. Another cool thing: King, who published one of the first e-books back in 2000, did not release Joyland electronically: “Let people stir their sticks and go to an actual bookstore rather than a digital one,” King said. (TSM)

TWELVE YEARS A SLAVE

BY SOLOMON NORTHRUP You’ve seen — or at the very least heard about — the compelling, critically acclaimed film starring Chiwetel Ejiofor and directed by Steve McQueen. Now share the doubly compelling memoir on which it’s based. Solomon Northrup’s 1853 autobiography recounts the act of deceit that took him from being a free negro in Minerva, N.Y., to a slave in the Louisiana bayou — via Washington, D.C., where he awoke one day to find himself in “a slave pen within the very shadow of the Capitol.” Eventually he would be reunited with his family, but not before being whipped, degraded, and narrowly escaping death. Northrup’s firsthand account of human cruelty and kindness, delivered with intelligence and superhuman wry humor, was a bestseller four decades before the first American bestseller list existed. The new film tie-in edition has a foreword by McQueen. (EJI)

OPEN LETTER SUBSCRIPTION

VARIOUS AUTHORS In the U.S., perhaps not surprisingly, publishers tend to gravitate toward Anglophone authors. Less than 3 percent of the books published in this country each year are translated from another language. Open Letter, which operates out of the University of Rochester in New York, is an independent press that specializes in cutting-edge, under-the-radar, or forgotten literature in translation from all over the world. For a literary gift that keeps on giving, Open Letter offers 6- ($60) and 12-month ($100) free-shipping subscription options that will deliver roughly one newly published book per month, along with a letter from the editor. Forthcoming titles include Everything Happens As It Does by Bulgarian author Albena Stambolova and Why I Killed My Best Friend by Greek writer Amanda Michalopoulou. They also offer bundles of their first 25 or 50 books at incredibly steep discounts. More info at openletterbooks.org. (EJI)

CRAB MONSTERS, TEENAGE CAVEMEN & CANDY STRIPE NURSES

BY CHRIS NASHAWATY This visually arresting, gleefully kitsch coffee table book on Roger Corman — self-styled “King of the B-movie” — doesn’t skimp on substance. Alongside behind-the-scenes photos spanning his more-than-50-year career and full-color movie poster reprints for films like She Gods of Shark Reef and The Saga of the Viking Women and Their Voyage to the Waters of The Great Sea Serpent are historical blurbs and interviews with Corman’s (slightly more famous) protégés: Ron Howard, James Cameron, Robert De Niro and Martin Scorsese, to name only a few. Cineastes will appreciate its reminiscences and context, designers will value its aesthetic appeal, and everyone else ought to enjoy reading about the man who brought moviegoers Swamp Women (1955) and Dinocroc vs. Supergator (2010). (EJI)

PENGUIN DROP CAPS SERIES

VARIOUS AUTHORS Penguin’s Drop Caps series takes its name from its eyecatching typographical cover designs, with each letter of the alphabet representing the surname of an author of a classic work. So, for example, A stands for Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, B is for Charlotte Brontë’s Jane Eyre, and so on up to the series’ most recent ad...continued on next page

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 39

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continued dition, Swann’s Way by Marcel Proust. The visual consistency (the consecutive spines form a literary rainbow) and canonical quality of the Drop Caps books make them a great addition to an existing personal library or the basis for a new one. Since Q through Z have yet to come, future books can become a holiday gift tradition. (EJI)

THE GOLDEN NOTEBOOK

BY DORIS LESSING When Doris Lessing passed away last month, she left behind a body of work that included opera libretti, poetry, plays, memoirs, graphic novels and essays in addition to the novels for which this 2007 Nobel Laureate was most famous. The Golden Notebook, which takes up more -isms than Orwell (among them pacif-, feminand commun-), is perhaps the most renowned of those novels, winning a popular readership despite its earnest treatment of heady, often bleak sociopolitical themes and its experimentation with a postmodern style. This is such an intricate, involved, far-reaching work of fiction, it contains something to resonate with almost any reader. (EJI)

0 DER.COM $1U5M.E0 .INLAN

VOL

ILABLE UMBER AVA ICES LIMITED N PR AY D LI O SPECIAL H

INDIE BOOKSTORE SERENDIPITY

Instead of going shopping with a specific book in mind, why not head to a secondhand indie bookstore and see where fate leads you? In Spokane alone there are Cal’s Books, Monkeyboy Books, 2nd Look Books, Book Traders, Rae’s Book Exchange and The Book Parlor, plus dozens of vintage stores and charity shops with at least a shelf or two of pre-owned books. Browse sections according to the recipient’s interest or strike up a conversation with the clerk and get a personal recommendation, since an anecdote makes any gift a little more special. You could very well wind up with a surprise find for less money. Or a whole stack of finds for the price of a new hardcover. (EJI) n

40 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

Offer ends 1/9/2014. While supplies last. Activ. Fee: $36/line. Sprint One Up SM: Smartphones only. Req. installment agmt, 24 monthly payments, 0% APR on approved credit & qualifying service plan. Sales taxes due at sale on full purchase price. If you cancel wireless service, remaining balance on device becomes due. Annual upgrade: Req. new device installment agmt, min. 12 consecutive installment payments, acct. in good standing, & give back of current eligible device in good & functional condition. After upgrade, remaining unbilled installment payments are waived. Details at sprint.com/oneup. $15 One Up Service Discount: Monthly discount available for devices financed under installment agmt & subscription to Unlimited, My Way. Discount will appear on invoice with the first installment payment (within 1-3 invoices) and will expire when installment agmt balance is paid in full. Unlimited Guarantee: Available while line of service is activated on the Unlimited, My Way SM plan or My All-in SM plan. Applies to unlimited features only. Price and phone selection subject to change. Account must remain in good standing and non-payment may void guarantee. Non-transferrable. Plan: No plan discounts apply for talk or messaging. Premium content/downloads are add’l charge. Text to 3rd parties to participate in promotions or other may result in add’l charges. Int’l svcs are not included. Includes select e-mail. Amount of data depends on option selected. Usage Limitations: Other plans may receive prioritized bandwidth availability. Streaming video speeds may be limited to 1 Mbps. Sprint may terminate service if off-network roaming usage in a month exceeds: (1) 800 min. or a majority of min.; or (2) 100 MB or a majority of KB. Prohibited network use rules apply. See sprint.com/termsandconditions. $45 Comparison: Unlimited, My Way vs. Verizon Share Everything with 4GB of data and AT&T Mobile Share with 4GB of data, each for $110/mo. as of 9/27/13. Additional data options available. Competitor plans include tethering/mobile hotspot and may include device insurance. Sprint offers 1GB Mobile Hotspot add-on for $10/mo. and insurance for an add’l charge. Other Terms: Offers and coverage not available everywhere or for all phones/networks. Available only in select channels/states. Nationwide Sprint Network reaches over 278 million people. Sprint 4G LTE network reaches over 225 markets, on select devices. Visit www.sprint.com/coverage. May not be combinable with other offers. Sprint reserves the right to modify, extend or cancel offers at any time. This is a limited time offer. Restrictions apply. See store for details. ©2013 Sprint. All rights reserved. Sprint and the logo are trademarks of Sprint. Other marks are the property of their respective owners.

Carrying the Tune Broadway is just the latest stop for Spokane’s musically talented O’Neill-Long family BY LISA WAANANEN

B

randon O’Neill won’t be coming home for Christmas this year, but that’s the way it goes if you’re part of a Broadway show premiering in less than 10 weeks. O’Neill’s role as a sidekick in Aladdin, the Disney musical adapted from the animated movie, is one he originated at the 5th Avenue Theatre in Seattle, and he’s at home on the stage after a series of critically acclaimed lead roles. But Broadway is in some ways very far from where he got his start here in Spokane, where he grew up singing in church and with his family, and later leading the band Rough Congress. “I always dreamed that my voice would pay the bills, but never imagined musical theater as a venue for that,” he wrote from his dressing room in Toronto, where the cast is in the middle of three months of “pre-Broadway” rehearsals. Music, in many forms, runs in the O’Neill blood. Brandon’s father grew up singing, as did his father. His aunt, Annie O’Neill, is a singer who’s performed at the House of Blues in Las Vegas. Another aunt, BethAnn Long, recorded three albums and still performs. Three of her sons, plus another cousin, are sharing a stage for a first time in years this weekend at the Bartlett. Christmas caroling with the O’Neill family is a “four-part harmony affair,” Brandon says, and he and his cousins share memories

of sing-alongs and gatherings where their different styles had a common start. “Simple opportunities to hear and be heard and encouragement to raise your voice were common in our family,” he says. “This is how singers are born.”

T

he way the story goes, it all started with Scott Joplin’s “Maple Leaf Rag.” Anne O’Neill bought the sheet music and taught herself to play piano, and her children grew up sitting beside her as she played ragtime piano in North Dakota during the Great Depression. One of her sons, J. Pat O’Neill, sang in barbershop quartets, and with his wife Theresa brought up seven children singing harmonies in Spokane. “Whenever we were in the car going on a trip, Dad was singing,” says his son Shane, Brandon’s father. “He’s a whistler and a crooner and he sings all the time. It plants seeds into your mind and your soul about music — and then it’s up to the individual to take it from there.” As kids, Shane and his twin brother Kevin sang on Starlit Stairway, the live talent show televised in Spokane every Saturday night for decades. They performed when the renowned barbershop ...continued on next page

Brandon O’Neill , far right, in his role for Aladdin.

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 41

CULTURE | TRADITIONS “CARRYING THE TUNE,” CONTINUED... quartet Buffalo Bills came to town in 1961. “There’s a recording — we sound like the Chipmunks because our voices hadn’t changed,” Kevin says. Kevin says he’s not taking credit, but he likes to tell about how he put a three-quarter-size guitar with a missing string into the arms of little BethAnn. “Next thing you know she’s playing John Denver and everything else,” he says. Now 87, the patriarch of the family is a steady supporter at Spokane’s theaters and auditoriums, coffee shops and music venues — anywhere his children and grandchildren make music. He’s proud of the family legacy, but deftly pushes the spotlight toward the newer generations. “These guys are the up-and-comers,” he says.

W

hile Brandon O’Neill was in Seattle singing with the Seattle Symphony and earning leading roles, his younger cousins were forging their own styles. As teens, Patrick O’Neill and his cousins Curran and Riley Long earned a following and packed the Big Easy as the rock band Mylestone. They moved on, but didn’t stop making music. Twins Curran and Riley, now 24, have been performing more than half their lives. “It wasn’t like our parents shoved us into classical music lessons or anything, we just had a basement full of fun, musical toys,” Curran says. Their older brother, singer-songwriter Kevin Long, has toured with Rocky Votolato and embarked on his own West Coast tour this past summer. Their cousin Patrick, now also based in Seattle, put out an album this year that gives credit to several O’Neills for backup vocals.

Dec 20th - 22nd Dec 26th - 29th 2013 & Jan 1st - 5th 2014 Bring your family to the MAC for a 1910 holiday experience! At this annual event, you can leisurely wander the Campbell House and Carriage House to visit, and play a game of charades, with Mrs. Campbell. Bake cookies with Hulda the cook, and learn about the Campbell’s electric car with Joseph Rainsberry the coachman.

Get into the spirit! 42 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

The Long family, (left to right) Meghan, Curran, BethAnn, Riley, Colin and Bill sing together at Summit Church. SAMUEL SARGEANT PHOTO It’s been a long time since they shared a stage together, and their shared show this Friday night at the Bartlett is a reunion of sorts. The youngest Long siblings, also twins, also are talented performers. The musical gene continued to the next generation of great-grandchildren — the family’s youngest singer-songwriter is University High sophomore Jamison Sampson, who has recorded with Curran. The whole family agrees it’s about nurturing and encouragement, not competition, though Brandon jokes that it could get ugly if someone won a Grammy. “How do you thank a family as big as the O’Neills?” he says.

“‘He said Kevin’s name, why didn’t he say mine?’” Success gets the headlines, but music has carried the family through hard times, too, as a symbol of what binds them. “Music has always been part of our lives,” Shane says. “And it brought us through the good years and it brought us through the bad.”  Like Lions with Bristol and Kevin Long • Fri, Dec. 20 • $8 advance/$10 day of show • The Bartlett • 228 W. Sprague Ave. • thebartlettspokane.com

CULTURE | DIGEST

CLASSICAL HOLIDAY POPS N

early 2,000 people joining voices for “Joy to the World” or “It Came Upon a Midnight Clear” year after year may seem monotonous, but for so many, the tradition of belting out those well-known lyrics with the Spokane Symphony for its Holiday Pops Celebration concerts never tires. “There is something extra special about singing along while the full orchestra plays. Everyone, young and old, really gets into it,” says resident conductor Morihiko Nakahara, who is helming Saturday and Sundays concerts. It’s that time of year again when every artistic organization pulls out all the stops for the holiday season hoping to attract festive crowds. Continuing its season-long SuperPops series with this weekend’s festive concerts, the symphony is no exception. The show will play up treasured seasonal favorites (“’Twas the Night Before Christmas”), inspired Christmas medleys (a mash-up of “Frosty the Snowman,” “Jingle Bells” and more) and lush pieces you may not have heard before (“A Charleston Christmas”). The show finishes with the popular sing-along session. In addition, the Spokane Symphony Chorale and Spokane Area Youth Choir will join the orchestra onstage for full-out showstoppers (“Gloria,” “Christmas At Home”). Surprises are also planned with Santa slated to conduct one piece and a performance by a mystery guest,

Spokane Symphony conductor Morihiko Nakahara gets jolly. who Nakahara promises will spice up the evening with a “hot number.” “Our Holiday Pops concerts have turned into quite the local family tradition,” Nakahara says. “It’s a show where the audience can sit back and enjoy the memories that our music brings.” — LAURA JOHNSON Spokane Symphony SuperPops: Holiday Pops Celebration • Sat-Sun, Dec. 21 at 8 pm, Dec. 22 at 2 pm • The Fox • 1001 W. Sprague Ave. • $26- $62 • ticketswest. com • 1-800-325-SEAT

For Your Consideration BY JACOB JONES

ALBUM | Portland troubadour Casey Neill brings a little more jangle and swagger to his latest album, ALL YOU PRETTY VANDALS, released last month. Backed by the all-star Norway Rats — comprised of members of the Decemberists, Eels and She & Him — Neill offers 11 down-and-out anthems for the Rose City. Shaped by both the Celtic folk and punk rock traditions, the album traces a Northwesterner’s line between the Clash, the Pogues and the Boss. Songs buzz with ramshackle guitar and reckless piano as Neill belts out heart-weary tales in a balladeer’s growl, singing of defiant hope in dark alleyways.

BOOK | This widely acclaimed collection of 10 short stories by George Saunders, TENTH OF DECEMBER, plays out like a diabolical philosophy exam with morals tested against upside-down expectations. The book carries a strong energy and clarity of mission throughout each story as characters encounter fumbling kidnappers, forced pharmaceutical experiments and a variety of selfdelusions. Saunders shifts perspective with rare tact and finds unique sparks of humanity amid dark, often twisted themes. It’s a book full of uncommon insights and surprising successes.

TV | Just six episodes in, ALMOST HUMAN, a new show about future detectives partnered with life-like androids, manages an entertaining mix of crime drama and science fiction. Many of the themes seem pulled from I, Robot, but the show has slowly started shaking off some of its early cliches. Set in the year 2048, the show follows hardened Det. John Kennex and his robo-partner Dorian as they face off against criminals, organized and otherwise, armed with imaginative new technology. Genetic, holographic and surveillance tech allow interesting new approaches to both committing and fighting crime.

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 43

CULTURE | FOOTBALL

WSU center Elliott Bosch, a Ferris High school grad, plays in his final game as a Cougar this weekend. JIM SIMPKINS PHOTO

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ootball teams that have suffered through years of duress have been known to let up on the gas once they finally play in a bowl

game. The Washington State Cougars insist they are not one of those teams. They plan to prove it Saturday in Albuquerque, N.M., when the Cougars square off with Colorado State in the New Mexico Bowl in the first game of the extensive bowl schedule. “We don’t want to go down there just to have fun,” running back Marcus Mason says. “We want to have fun while winning the game.” Kicker Andrew Furney added, “I don’t feel like there’s any feeling on the team that, ‘Oh yeah, we’ve made it, we’ve arrived and that’s that. Let’s go out and celebrate and enjoy ourselves. Who really cares about the win?’” The Cougars are just 6-6, but sports statistician Jeff Sagarin ranks their schedule as the toughest in the nation. The Rams are 7-6, but none of the teams they beat has a winning record, and their schedule was ranked among the easiest. If you’re a betting type, Vegas lists WSU as a 4½-point favorite. Colorado State is far more balanced on offense than WSU — the Cougars rank first in the nation in pass attempts, last in rushing attempts — but the teams do have similarities. Both struggled in recent years; both rely heavily on underclassmen; both run up-tempo, no-huddle offenses; and both have head coaches in their second year on the job. Mike Leach, who guided Texas Tech to bowl games all 10 seasons he coached the Red Raiders, has steered the Cougars into their first

bowl game since 2003, also the last season WSU finished with a winning record. “This [coaching] staff has done a good job of really changing the culture,” Furney says. Colorado State coach Jim McElwain, a native of Missoula, Mont., is a former Eastern Washington quarterback and assistant coach. He took over the Rams last season after serving as offensive coordinator on Alabama’s 2011 national championship squad. The Rams are making their first bowl appearance since winning the 2008 New Mexico Bowl. “There is a certain aura that goes around being a bowl team,” McElwain says, “and there is a certain club now; you can walk in the back alley and knock on the door and you have the secret code to get in.” Rams running back Kapri Bibbs is drawing All-America attention. He led the Mountain West Conference with 1,572 rushing yards (eighth in the nation) and 28 touchdowns (second). Bibbs best keep an eye out for WSU All-American safety Deone Bucannon, the Pac-12 Conference leader with 109 tackles. WSU quarterback Connor Halliday, a graduate of Ferris High School in Spokane, ranks fourth in the nation with 4,187 passing yards. Colorado State QB Garrett Grayson, from Heritage High in Vancouver, Wash., ranks 18th with 3,327 passing yards. Halliday must be wary of blitzing linebacker Shaquil Barrett, who is tied for third in the nation with 12 quarterback sacks.  New Mexico Bowl • Washington State (6-6) vs. Colorado State (7-6) • Sat, Dec. 21 at 11 am • Televised on ESPN

CULTURE | THEATER

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The Basement Ladies return for the holidays in a prequel to Interplayers’ preseason hit

Dec. 21 • 7:30pm

BY E.J. IANNELLI

Featuring: Doug Webster, Krista Curry, Jenny Shotwell, Chelsea LeValley, & Spokane’s Own Krista Kubicek & Max Mendez

P

requels aren’t just for movies. Although they’re far less common in theater, you can certainly find them, often by following a long trail of box-office receipts. Due in large part to the success of the first two plays in his Henry VI trilogy, Shakespeare is suspected to have written the first part after what became the third. More recently, the Broadway hit Wicked has continued to mine a theatrical mother lode by post-predating The Wizard of Oz. So when Church Basement Ladies entertained 250,000 patrons over its two-and-a-half-year opening run at Minnesota’s Plymouth Playhouse in 2005, its production company was no doubt inspired to start writing other works at different points on a shared timeline. Away in the Basement, the Christmas-themed installment, arose as the third play in the franchise, but it’s actually the first in its chronology. That made it a clear holiday choice for Interplayers, which staged the original Church Basement Ladies play during the theater’s summer preseason. “It takes place five years before the Church Basement Ladies people saw in the summer,” says Jennifer Jacobs, who’s reprising — or pre-prising — her role as Karin Engleson. “That allows the characters to change in those five years, and you see how the relationships have developed. But in reverse.” In Away in the Basement, Pastor Gunderson, played again by Jerry Sciarrio, meets the woman who will become his wife in Church Basement Ladies. Signe Engleson (Sarah Uptagrafft), whose marriage fueled much of the humor and drama in the summer production, begins dating her future fiancé in this prequel. “I’m a young teenager this time instead of almost an adult,” says Uptagrafft. “And Harry, who’s the boy that my character marries in the first show, has developed a crush on me they will not let me forget.” The step backward in time also means that Willie, the unseen handyman who passes away in the first installment, is still alive (and still unseen) here. But in this tiny, mid-20th century Minnesota town, some things are bound to stay the same,

even when time moves in the opposite direction. Like the earlier production, also directed by Michael Weaver, there’s a big event — in this case, the annual Christmas pageant — that has the church basement buzzing with activity, bringing “scatterbrained” Mavis Gilmerson (Kathie Doyle-Lipe, who’s appearing simultaneously in Crazy for You at the Civic), change-averse Vivian Snustad (Marianne McLaughlin, stepping into Susan Windham’s prior role), the pastor and the Englesons back together. Their dynamic hasn’t changed greatly. Mavis is “the fixer.” Vivian is “the antagonist.” Pastor Gunderson is the mediator. And even though the stakes are slightly smaller this time around, Signe still butts heads with her mother, Karin. It’s that combination of familiar characters and recognizable personalities that draws theatergoers to each new production of Church Basement Ladies, says Jacobs. “Everybody in the audience knows these people. They have these archetypal categories, and they identify: ‘Oh, I know a Vivian,’ whether it’s in their church or their work. It’s fun to come back and see them in this great atmosphere with fun songs.” Sciarrio says that the songs are especially festive in this holiday production. When it comes to message and style, the titles alone hint at what’s in store: “Whatsoever You Doo-Wop,” “Just Not Mary Material,” “Reindeer Rendezvous,” as well as the closing number, a traditional Norwegian song called “Jeg er så Glad.” “There’s a big message about being a kid again at Christmas and enjoying the season,” says Jacobs. “And remembering others who are less fortunate,” adds Doyle-Lipe. “There’s all kinds of beautiful messages in the show, but I just want audiences to walk out happier than when they walked in.”  Away in the Basement • Dec. 19-Jan. 5: WedSat, 7:30 pm; Sun, 2 pm • $28 ($20 senior/ military, $12 student) • Interplayers • 174 S. Howard • 455-7529 • interplayerstheatre.org

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Liquid Gold

Karen Hansen with a glass of her family’s cherry apple cider at Hansen’s Green Bluff Orchard.

Drink your apple cider pressed, steamed, spiced or spiked BY JO MILLER

T

he Hansens were looking forward to their first apple crop at their Green Bluff orchard after they planted their trees 27 years ago. But a June hailstorm hit hard and ruined the crop. “We were looking at the apples like, ‘What are we going to do?’” Karen Hansen says. A neighbor loaned them an old wooden press after hearing about their damaged apples. Then a church youth group came, helped turn the apples into apple cider and sold it at the church. The Hansens never planned on making apple cider before this happened; it wasn’t even on their minds, Karen says.

46 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

“That’s how cider was born here: out of a bad apple year,” she says. Some of those same people who helped the first year still make cider with the Hansens. Karen and Rod Hansen’s oldest son Derrick points to the wood wall behind the red steel press they now use, where names of people who helped at each pressing over the years and how much was produced are scrawled in black marker. Pressing starts in late August every year. Each batch yields about 200 gallons of cider from about 120 boxes of a blend of different apple types. “You need a variety of apples to get that nice flavor,”

SARAH WURTZ PHOTOS

Derrick says. The apples are fed through a hopper and ground like coleslaw into large barrels. Then the barrels go under the press and 1,500 pounds of pressure pushes the juice out of the apples into a large holding container. The Hansens pasteurize their cider before bottling it. Nothing needs to be added to it, like water or sugar. Except that the Hansens make two flavored ciders: a grape-apple cider made with patriot grapes and a cherryapple cider.

F

or most people, apple cider cravings usually coincide with yuletide vibes — sitting under the glow cast by Christmas tree lights, sipping a mug of steaming cider. But cider actually is made in the fall. One of the major factors in getting good cider is to press the apples within a couple days of picking them from the trees, Karen says. By now, Hansen’s Green Bluff Orchard has already sold out of the cider they pressed in the fall. “It is a terribly popular product,” Derrick says. “I don’t mean to brag, but we can’t make enough.”

The Hansens suggest buying cider in late fall, freezing it and thawing it out for Christmas. Just take a cup or so out of the jug because it will expand, but it freezes well for up to a year, Karen says. Other Green Bluff farms — like Cherry Shack, Harvest House and Walter’s Fruit Ranch — press their own cider too. The Cherry Shack has sold out as well, but if you wanted some farm-made apple cider for the holiday, there’s still hope. The Harvest House has some frozen, and Walter’s is still pressing and selling cider until Dec. 23 and will sell it frozen year-round. You also can take a do-it-yourself approach and make your own cider. If you don’t have a press, you could steam the juice out of the apples in a large pot. The flavor will be different, though, because it’s cooked. Once you have your cider, there are numerous ways to flavor it and even cook with it. The Hansens put together spice packets that go with their cider: a mixture of brown sugar, cinnamon sticks, Red Hots and cloves. Adding cinnamon schnapps or rum (like Captain Morgan) tastes good, too, and you can use cherry-

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The Hansens — Rod, Karen, and Derrick Hansen, from left — have been growing apples on Green Bluff for three decades. apple cider to baste on ribs or turkey, Derrick says. Mark and Arlene Morrell of Walter’s Fruit Ranch use apple cider to make sugar-free apple butter. Cider works nicely for replacing sugar in sugar-free recipes, Arlene says. You can also satisfy your apple cider hankering in downtown Spokane. The Kitchen Engine sells apple cider mulling spices in premeasured jars, with a blend of cloves, allspice and orange zest. If you want to try a dish cooked with apple cider, Herbal Essence makes bacon-and-date-stuffed pork loin with apple cider and thyme glaze. “Traditionally, pork and apples go together,” says chef owner Ryan Morales. The pork has pieces of apple mixed with cinnamon and nutmeg. Alison Collins, owner of Boots Bakery and Lounge, currently makes apples and pears stuffed with dried fruit, oats and brown sugar, baked in apple cider. Boots also serves organic hot apple cider. People like to get it with fresh orange zest and cinnamon, with steamed milk or in chai, Collins says. Or try their boozy hot apple cider with spiked brandy, ginger liqueur, fresh lemon and a cinnamon stick. n

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Chairs’ new location is a coffee shop in the morning and bar in the evening. SARAH WURTZ PHOTO

Everything for Everybody Chairs Public House welcomes the community for early-morning coffee, late-night drinks and lots in between BY LISA WAANANEN

“W

hen are you going to open?” That’s the question the owners of Chairs Coffee got constantly after choosing a second location near Gonzaga last February. So even though the new Chairs Public House is still technically in its soft opening phase — a grand opening is planned for January — it’s not a surprise that tables have been filled since the day the doors were unlocked. Gonzaga students crowd around tables with piles of books, while parents chat over Roast House coffee. Even members of the city council have stopped in. The original Chairs Coffee on Indiana Avenue has become a popular hangout in the three years since it opened, and the new location has the same comfortable atmosphere. But it’s more than a coffee shop — Chairs Public House boasts a full bar, and the recessed ceiling lights are dimmed for the evening crowd. It opens at 6 am for early-morning coffee, and doesn’t close until 2 am. (Those under 21 are allowed until 10 pm; the original Chairs now closes at 4 pm.) The idea is to offer as much as possible under one roof, says Chris Nichols, a co-owner with Mitchell Moczulski and Scott Wilburn. Nichols likens it to the way technology has merged so it’s possible to have a phone, camera and computer all in one gadget. “That’s what we’re trying to do with this

business,” he says. “It’s like the iPhone of the restaurant community.” Some people who stop in remember drinking there back when the building was home to the Bulldog for more than 60 years. One of the best parts so far, Nichols says, is when those visitors first step inside and see the renovated space as something entirely new, not just a version of what it used to be. The menu includes most popular items from Chairs Coffee, like the Chair sandwich with roasted turkey, provolone, lettuce and pesto aioli ($8). The burgers, salads and flatbreads come with distinctive touches like ciabatta buns and sweet potato fries, and the avocado fries ($8) have been a hit so far. The breakfast menu — featuring items like a breakfast burrito ($6) and a paleo waffle made with ripe banana ($5) — is served all day. There’s no lack of ideas or hesitation about trying them. Karaoke and trivia are in the works, as are plans for art, philanthropy and collaborations with other businesses in the area. And, they say, feedback is always welcome. “We want to see what the community wants,” Nichols says. n Chairs Public House • 1305 N. Hamilton • 6 am-2 am (21+ after 10 pm) • 381-0909 • chairspublichouse.com

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Build It Noble Roman’s offers take-andbake pizza and the power to ask for exactly what you want BY JO MILLER

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ou pick up a piping hot pizza and start to drive home. But en route it cools down and the cheese starts to coagulate. “The time it gets from being nice and hot to being leftover pizza is just a few minutes,” John Johnson says. That’s why people are drawn to take-and-bake pizza. People want hot pizza, and it won’t be that way unless you pull it out of your own oven and sit on your couch to eat it, he says. Last month Johnson opened a North Spokane location of Noble Roman’s Take-n-Bake Pizza, a franchise based in Indianapolis. It’s located at the Safeway shopping center, in the small building facing Hawthorne Road that used to house Keva Juice, then long stood empty. Being a take-and-bake place means you get to eat your pizza hot. And at Noble Roman’s, it also means you get to direct what goes on your pizza. It’s the Subway concept of seeing it and getting what you want, Johnson says.

At other pizza places you usually can’t see what’s happening to your pizza before it’s baked. But at Noble Roman’s, you watch them assemble it; you can, for example, ask for a few more olives. “It’s easier for people to speak up and say how they really want their food,” Johnson says. Here’s the kicker: None of the toppings cost extra. If you get a plain cheese pizza or a 12-topping pizza, it doesn’t matter, they’re the same price, he says. Both a large traditional-crust and thin-crust pizza cost $10.99, and a large deep-dish is $12.99. You can also get a medium traditional-crust for $8.99. Build your pizza by choosing one of three sauces — traditional red sauce, barbecue or Alfredo — and picking toppings that range from spinach, jalapenos and pineapple to ham, grilled chicken, pepperoni and sausage. Or pick a recommended option off the menu, like the Big Daddy BBQ made with barbeque sauce and cheddar cheese, topped with sausage, bacon and ham. Noble Roman’s also has other pizza accompaniers like salad kits, breadsticks and 7-inch cinnamon pizzas.  Noble Roman’s • 10220 N. Newport Hwy. • Open Mon-Sun, 11 am-9 pm • 464-4862 • freshpza.com

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Perms and Passion David O. Russell makes a near-perfect crime film with American Hustle BY MARYANN JOHANSON

T

here are things that made me gasp and marvel at David O. Russell’s audacity in American Hustle. He’s tweaking Martin Scorsese, the master of a genre I don’t know what to call. Crime drama, sure, but it’s more specific: Epic ensemble historical crime dramedy. Narrower still: Epic ensemble historical crime dramedy bursting with insanely engaging characters who are impossibly real, impossibly ridiculous, whose stories you don’t ever want to end. It was a genre of one before now: GoodFellas is a rare perfect movie, and it’s one of my favorites. Now there’s American Hustle, also perfect, also instantly a favorite of mine. I can’t wait to see it again. Nobody here is particularly likable. Christian Bale and Amy Adams’ con team are criminals who prey on desperate people and get off on it. Jennifer Lawrence is Bale’s manipulative, passive-aggressive wife. Bradley Cooper is an FBI agent with more balls than brains (and he’s got plenty of brains). But they’re all utterly fascinating — like a 50-car pileup on the highway. The magnificent ensemble embody them and their absurd quirks — almost all revolving around scary 1970s fashion and hairstyles — with a gusto that’s close to terrifying in the most deliciously entertaining way. Russell’s script (with Eric Warren Singer) sets them upon one

50 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

another, doing some very precise damage to abundant, towering ambition, worthy of a game of Jenga, leads exposed weaknesses and anxieties. The first such them into bigger plots designed to bring down evermoment comes mere minutes into the film, something more-powerful men — from mayors to mob kingpins to targeted so hilariously by one vain man at another vain D.C. politicians — with ever-increasing, multimillionman’s insecurities, it ripped a snort of deranged laughter dollar amounts at stake. It gets intriguingly tricky when from me. Jeremy Renner as Joe Pesci as Carmine Polito, mayor Hustle does that a lot. Everything here is perfectly of Camden, N.J., gets caught in DiMaso’s snare. Polito, modulated for humor, pathos and who wants to rebuild Atlantic City acrimony, all at once. Though it takes as a jobs-creating, economy-boosting AMERICAN HUSTLE place in the late ’70s — the fictional story measure, just needs investors... which Rated R is set among a real FBI operation from invariably will involve the mafia. But Directed by David O. Russell the era — the push-and-pull Russell sets is Polito a bad guy? Does he deserve Starring Christian Bale, Amy Adams, up between the everyday scratching out to be the target of an FBI sting? Irving Jennifer Lawrence, Bradley Cooper of mere survival and the desire for life to isn’t so sure. be something grander and more exciting “Some of this actually happened,” feels very much of the now. Irving Rosenfeld (Bale) and we are informed as the film opens. Hustle‘s genius is his “genius” — and she is — partner Sydney Prosser (Adthat it leads us to a point where we realize it’s happenams) just want to get by; they kept their cons small and ing all the time, in a grimy, spiritual sense. “We’re all under the radar. When they accidentally try to con the conning ourselves,” Irving informs us in voice-over early wrong guy in undercover agent Richie DiMaso (Cooin the film, while we’re still scoffing at how ridiculous per), he convinces them to work with him to pull off a he is, and how we couldn’t possibly be like him. But series of stings in exchange for staying out of prison. the multiple layers of self-delusion at play among all the Hustle is full of awesome ‘70s rock, lapels wide characters, and the events that carry them along in spite enough to put someone’s eye out and terrible perms. of their best intentions otherwise? That’s something we And it’s about Irving’s increasing dismay, as Richie’s can all see in ourselves, if we’re honest. 

FILM | SHORTS

OTHER OPENING FILMS AMERICAN HUSTLE

Coming off the splendid Silver Linings Playbook, director David O. Russell is back, bringing the stars of that film, Jennifer Lawrence and Bradley Cooper, along. This time, the subject matter is a little more intense: He takes us back to the glittery 1970s for a crime drama about a group of corrupt politicians living the high life in New Jersey. Soon most of the cast is tangled in the web of the mafia as some become FBI informants. It sounds like a lot of other mafia flicks, but take a look at the fabulous costume designs and the fact that Cooper sports a perm, and you’ve got something special here. (MB) Rated R

ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES

In their 2004 masterpiece Anchorman, Adam McKay and Will Ferrell captivated audiences and critics with his uncompromising profile of legendary San Diego anchorman Ron Burgundy. He brought his lens to bear not just on the cutthroat atmosphere of internal and external news rivalries, but on the entire 1970s zeitgeist — gender equality, male ego, animal cruelty and even, through a simple but wise weathercaster, mental illness. Anchorman 2 leaps forward into the next decade, where an older, presumably wiser Burgundy must reckon with the dialectical tensions inherent to class, race, sexual ethics and death itself. Also, scotchy scotch scotch. (DW) PG-13

BETTIE PAGE REVEALS ALL

This documentary brings us back to the early days of the sexual revolution when the image of America’s top pin-up model, Bettie Page, was driving men bonkers. Her sexuality drove the powers that be crazy, but at the same time she was becoming more and more popular. Then, Page just vanished. Director Mark Mori pieces together the Bettie Page story, including what she did in her later years. The best part of it all — the film is narrated by Bettie Page herself. (MB) Rated R.

INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS

Joel and Ethan Coen, following their own footsteps of filling a film with music, as they did in O Brother, Where Art Thou?, this time take on the early ’60s Greenwich Village folk scene. The title character (Oscar Isaac) is a multi-talented folkie who has no people skills and is likely ahead of his time. The people around him seem to cause nothing but crises, but the determined Llewyn sings on, against all odds. Not always a good idea in a Coen Brothers film. This is funny, sad, and snarky, with dark turns to boot, and a terrific acoustic soundtrack. (ES) Rated R

SAVING MR. BANKS

Walt Disney (Tom Hanks) has a 20-year promise hanging over his head. After his daughters ask for their beloved Mary Poppins to be turned into a movie, Disney begins a quest to gain the rights from stubborn P.L Travers (Emma Thompson.) Refusing him time and time again for fear of her classic becoming commercialized, Walt has a two-week window where she will listen to his proposal, and hopefully let him make his movie. Telling the story of how once again Walt Disney made magic, as well as where the famous Poppins originated from, this film ironically Disney-ifies the truth of the story, giving it an unnecessary happy ending. (ER) PG-13

WALKING WITH DINOSAURS

More advanced than the animation in Land Before Time but just as heartwarming, Walking with Dinosaurs, set in the late Cretaceous period more than 70 million years ago, follows three dinos — Patchi, Scowler, and Juniper — as they transition out of childhood into adulthood and lead their herd in migrating. Based on the BBC series of the same name, the film features more than 10 different types of computer-animated dinosaurs in liveaction settings similar to the conditions the creatures were exposed to during the period. The movie, set to be released in 3D, is incredibly visually appealing and spectacularly produced. (KS) PG

NOW PLAYING 12 YEARS A SLAVE

Based on his autobiography, this film tells the story of Solomon Northup, the free man turned slave in pre-Civil War U.S. It’s a heart wrenchingly amazing story about a man conned into slavery despite being a free citizen and his desperate fight for freedom. Chitewel Ejiofor finally gets center stage, but the film also features an all-star cast including Brad Pitt and Paul Giamatti. Definitely a powerfully artsy take on an old subject. (KS) Rated R

ALL IS LOST

We never learn the name of the grizzled yachtsman (Robert Redford) whose eightday fight to survive on the open sea is chronicled in J.C. Chandor’s magnificently primal All Is Lost. After all, how in the world are we supposed to sympathize with our soggy protagonist if we don’t know details about a rift with his daughter, or a childhood trauma he needs to overcome, or even why he’s sailing alone in the middle of nowhere? At Magic Lantern (SR) Rated PG-13

THE ARMSTRONG LIE

Few athletes have accomplished the sort of career faceplant performed by Lance Armstrong over the course of the past decade. The Texan went from winning seven consecutive Tour de Frances, convincing most of America to wear yellow rubber bracelets for a cause they didn’t necessarily understand, to essentially becoming Voldemort on a bicycle. Director Alex Gibney began following Armstrong in 2008 when he was mounting a comeback and got rare access. Along the way, Armstrong tells lie after lie about his performance-enhancing drug use, fooling a public that — as Gibney points out — may have wanted to be fooled all along. (MB) R

BLUE IS THE WARMEST COLOR

At 15, Adèle (Adèle Exarchopoulos) is hungry for something more. Her voracious appetite mirrors an emptiness in her heart as she desperately craves a first love that is unfulfilled by handsome male classmates. Falling in with older, blue haired Emma (Léa ...continued on next page

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FILM FILM||SHORTS SHORTS

NOW PLAYING Seydoux) is as easy as breathing, as the film chronicles their decade together. Intense and complicated as first love often is, Adèle finds herself lost in Abdel Kechiche’s epic three-hour drama about the tragedies and triumphs of romance. At Magic Lantern. (ER) NC-17

THE BOOK THIEF

When the Markus Zusak bestseller The Book Thief came on the scene in 2005, it was only a matter of time before a movie studio gobbled it up. Told from the perspective of the young girl Liesel (Sophie Nélisse) who goes to live with a foster family during WWII (Emily Watson, Geoffrey Rush), the film depicts one family’s fight to stand up against the Nazis. (LJ) Rated PG-13

CAPTAIN PHILLIPS

The true story of the Vermont cargo ship captain who delivers food and water to Africa, and whose ship is hijacked by Somali pirates is both a nail-biter and a fascinating character study, mostly centering on the relationship between the cool, calm captain (Tom Hanks) and the determined but unsure pirate leader Muse (newcomer Barkhad Abdi). The adventure parts are thrilling, the attack and takeover is unnerving, the lifeboat sequences are claustrophobic. (ES) Rated PG-13

all the names in this fantasy flick based on the Tolkien classic. (Smaug? Biblo? Erebor? Come on, now.) This second chunk features the majority of the action as Biblo Baggins (Martin Freeman) journeys with Wizard Gandalf (Ian McKellan) and 13 dwarves to save the dwarf kingdom of Erebor. Biblo has a magical ring, and we finally get to see our favorite Sherlock (Benedict Cumberbatch) voice the dragon. (ER) PG-13

KILL YOUR DARLINGS

Philomena Lee, an elderly British woman, confides in her daughter that she gave birth to a son in Ireland 50 years earlier. Unwed at the time, she was forced to give him up for adoption. Martin, a former government adviser and journalist out of a job, is looking for a story idea to bring to his editor. At a party, he hears of Philomena. Together, he and Philomena investigate the life of her lost son and find themselves exploring America looking for answers. (KS) Rated R

NEBRASKA

After the events of The Avengers, Thor (Chris Hemsworth) battles and brings peace to the ethereal nine realms. Back on Earth, his love, astrophysicist Jane Foster (Natalie Portman), waits and continues to research with her quip-happy assistant Darcy Lewis (Kat Dennings). Unfortunately, the nine realms are coming into alignment for the first time in millennia, causing invisible interdimensional portals to appear, threatening to destroy the universe. (SS) Rated PG-13

If you needed evidence that Daniel Radcliffe could survive a decade as Harry Potter you should really check out the actor as legendary poet Allen Ginsberg in this film about the early days of the beat movement. Here, we see Ginsberg, Jack Kerouac (Jack Huston) and William Burroughs brought together by the murder of David Kammerer by a mutual friend. It’s a seminal moment in American literature, but one most people haven’t heard of. At Magic Lantern (MB) Rated R

DALLAS BUYERS CLUB

Finding a Publishers Clearing House envelope stating that he’s won a million bucks, Woody Grant, a reckless, lonely boozer played by 77-year-old Bruce Dern, heads out from Montana to Nebraska to claim his fortune. He takes along his skeptical son (a post-SNL Will Forte), who’s humoring him, as Woody tells everyone he knows that he’s become a millionaire, gathering clingy new money-hungry friends along the way. Payne (Sideways, The Descendants, Election) shot the film in black and white, adding its already present sense of despair. (MB) R

ENOUGH SAID

Can two brothers be any more different? Good boy Russell (Christian Bale), resigned to working in a small-town mill, tries to keep a protective eye on his loose cannon younger brother Rodney (Casey Affleck) and Iraq war vet who would rather pummel opponents in bare-knuckle street fights to pay off his debts than get a job. Willem Dafoe plays a good-hearted bad guy, Woody Harrelson plays a purely evil one, everyone owes everyone else big money, brutal violence is an everyday thing, vengeance and/ or revenge is on the minds of many. It’s a nasty little movie with fine acting and a lot of promise, but without the writing and directing expertise to pull it off. (ES) Rated R

It’s 1985, and Ron Woodroof (Matthew McConaughey), an occasional bull-rider and full time electrician, lives his life between the sheets of stranger’s beds on a noxious combination of alcohol and cocaine, sheltered in a haze of his own homophobic, red-neck stereotype. When he’s diagnosed with HIV Woodroof decides to live anyway. Across the border, he discovers drugs that could prolong lives of HIV victims but that are not FDA approved. Smuggling them across the border, and teaming up with transvestite Rayon (Jared Leto,) the two work to sell drugs to a community that is quickly dying off. (ER) Rated R Eva (Julia Louis-Dreyfus), a divorcee, is facing the possibility of an empty nest, as her daughter goes off to college. As she bonds with similarly situated Albert (James Gandolfini) and the two click, it seems like the perfect romance. Eva also befriends Marianne (Catherine Keener), whose only flaw is her tendency to rag on and on about her ex-husband. (ER) Rated R

FROZEN

Frozen is a princess story; Disney is doubling down on the princesses — there’s two of ’em here. But Disney is also doubling down on the hints of nascent feminism Brave hinted at, the sort of bare-bones feminism which accepts that girls and women might possibly want more out of life than to get married. The princesses are sisters — the elder Elsa (the voice of Idina Menzel) and the younger Anna (the voice of Kristen Bell) — and this is mostly the story of their troubled relationship because Elsa is known to turn things into ice with her magical powers. (MJ) Rated PG

THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMOG

Splitting up a novel into three movies might seem like a bad idea, but most audience members will be still trying to keep track of

PHILOMENA

OUT OF THE FURNACE

THOR: THE DARK WORLD

TYLER PERRY MADEA CHRISTMAS

Tyler Perry’s Madea takes on Christmas when she is asked by her niece Eileen (Anna Maria Horsford) to spend the holiday in her daughter Lacey’s small town. Lacey (Tika Sumpter) is afraid that her mother will resent her decision to secretly marry a white boy (Eric Connor) and, instead of confessing the marriage, tells her that Connor is just a simple farmhand. When the farmhand’s folks come to visit, comedic misunderstandings follow, as Madea attempts to clear things up with advice and her usual threats of violence. After all, nothing says “Christmas” like falling into cow poop and threatening to strangle someone repeatedly. (ER) PG-13

WADJDA

Directed and written by Haifaa Al-Mansour, the first ever Saudi Arabian female filmmaker, this film gives us the life of rebellious Wadjda (Waad Mohammed) who discovers a bicycle in a store that she must have. Her mother, preoccupied with the fact that her husband may take on a second wife, dismisses the notion. Precocious Wadjda refuses to give up, though, and begins to earn money using her wits and entrepreneurship skills. At Magic Lantern. (ER) Rated PG 

CRITICS’ SCORECARD THE NEW YORK INLANDER TIMES

VARIETY

(LOS ANGELES)

METACRITIC.COM (OUT OF 100)

12 Years a Slave

97

Inside Llewyn Davis

94

American Hustle

89

All is Lost

88

Frozen

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Hunger Games 2

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The Hobbit 2

72

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Oscar Isaac is stunning as the titular character in the Coen Brothers’ latest.

The Coen Brothers strike again with Inside Llewyn Davis wo different camps of audiences are difficult as he is. Some of the film’s best, most going to be very happy with the newest uncomfortable moments are when he’s being beCoen Brothers film: Coen Brothers fans rated by another hopeful singer, the hot-tempered and folk music fans. The Coens’ dark, funny, Jean (Carey Mulligan, with whom Isaac shared sad, snarky take on the Greenwich Village acoussome great scenes in Drive). Isaac also has some tic scene is set in the early 1960s, right on the terrific one-on-one screen time when the plot cusp of when the so-called folk music revival was pulls Llewyn out on a road trip, accompanied about to catch on. Lots of people were playing by Coens regular John Goodman as a strung-out their guitars and singing traditional and original jazz hipster. That well-played part of the film songs, but no one was really paying the rent. removes us from the mood set in New York, and Including Llewyn Davis (Oscar Isaac), unfortunately doesn’t return to it fast enough, a scruffy fellow who knows his way around but it does give us an all-too-rare encounter with fingerpicking and has a beautiful voice to go F. Murray Abraham as a strictly-business club with his usually moving songs, owner. but no appreciable social skills. The other best moments, and INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS Llewyn’s the kind of guy who there are plenty of them, involve Rated R can bring tears to your eyes Written and directed by Joel Coen and music, all performed live by the when he’s onstage and make actors. It’s no surprise that Justin Ethan Coen you want to strangle him when Timberlake knows what to do Starring Oscar Isaac, Carey Mulligan, he’s off, when he’s had too with a guitar and a folk song, but Justin Timberlake, John Goodman much to drink and needs to the music we get from both Mulcrash, again, on your couch. ligan and Adam Driver (check out his “vocalizaThe Coens have based him, very loosely, on tions” on the goofy “Please Mr. Kennedy”) are Dave Van Ronk, a wonderful performer who like some of the film’s best surprises. Which leads us Llewyn was just a bit ahead of his time; although to Isaac, who’s been singing and playing guitar well known in folk circles, he probably would since he was 12, and proves what he can do here. have been much bigger if Dylan had paved the His riveting nod to Van Ronk on “Green Green way for him, instead of the other way around. Rocky Road” will cover the price of your ticket. The Coens have littered Llewyn’s life with If you stay for the end credits, you even get to problems and crises and people who are as hear Van Ronk sing it. 

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54 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

THE VOICE J.J. White belts out a karaoke tune at Studio K. STEPHEN SCHLANGE PHOTO

One of Spokane’s most powerful singers is a woman serving you drinks BY LEAH SOTTILE

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t’s a Friday night, and people are getting drunk. The bar is producing rounds of shots in the dozens. Every table is packed. It’s the kind of night when big groups of friends grab each other by the shoulders when the speakers emit their favorite songs, sloppily yelling the lyrics as their beers slosh to the floor. Most nights, groups of friends come here — a working class South Hill bar called Studio K — to get liquored up enough to belt out Journey and Dixie Chicks and Bon Jovi in the karaoke room and not care what anyone

else thinks. Tonight, a crowd of about 15 people huddle around two microphones and shout the B-52s’ “Love Shack” horribly. But nobody’s really listening. Everyone’s just worried that their name will be called next. So no one seems to notice when the cocktail waitress steps up to the microphone. She’s a pretty, blonde 46-year-old named Janice, but everyone here calls her J.J. She works the weekend shift and calls her customers “sweetie” when she hands them their drinks. Standing on the karaoke stage, she nervously fidgets with the micro-

phone as she waits for her song to start. When it does, out of this woman comes a voice like a thunderclap. She belts out “Chain of Fools” like she was taught how to sing it by Aretha Franklin herself. The place comes alive. People jump out of their seats and start dancing and clapping along. Two women grab each other’s hands and run onto the dance floor, twisting as they sing. When she finishes, the place erupts in applause. One of the “Love Shack” guys hops up, grabs ...continued on next page

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 55

MUSIC | PROFILES “THE VOICE,” CONTINUED... her by her shoulders and says, “I feel like I want to ask for your autograph!” She just smiles, collects her tray, heads to the bar and grabs her next round of orders.

I

f you blink too hard, you could miss Studio K. Maybe that’s why the owners decided to paint it yellow — to yell out to the busy thoroughfare that their tiny strip-mall bar was there. It’s an unassuming place, overshadowed by three grocery stores, a pet store, a constant snarl of traffic and the greasy aroma of nearby drive-throughs. It’s where J.J. White got her first bartending job at 21, where she came back to nine years ago to tend bar and serve drinks. And when there’s a lull in the karaoke lineup, it’s where she’ll step up to the microphone and let that big voice of hers out for a few minutes. White doesn’t sing much otherwise. She was in a blues band once, but that didn’t work out. Music was one of her first loves. Not demure, sweet songs, but big, powerful ones sung by women who meant it. She’ll admit there was a time when she was young when she thought her voice might make her famous. “But then you know, I had kids. Got married, had kids. Became a single parent. So all of my needs kind of got put on the back burner for awhile,” she says. She can’t complain, she says. She loves everything about her life. “You know, things change,” she says. “I don’t know, somewhere in the back of my mind, it would be cool to have just a one-hit wonder somewhere, you know?” Customers come into Studio K all the time and try to give her tips to sing. She’ll make them stick the cash in the bar’s Toys for Tots collection bin. People beg her to go on The Voice: “First of all, I would never know even how to do that. And, I don’t know. I’d probably be way too scared. You can ask my boss. Sometimes, I get done singing karaoke, I’ll be shaking so bad.” But deep inside, she loves how she feels when she sings. “Sometimes when I’m singing and I’ll just close my eyes, and I won’t even be concerned if I can hit the note or not. I just let it out. And I figure if it’s gonna happen, it’s gonna happen. And if it doesn’t, it doesn’t. Bear with me. And for the most part, it always has.” Even more than the way it makes her feel inside, she loves what it does to people. The realist inside of her — the practical one who scraped together meals from empty cupboards, the single parent, the one who works the closing shift at the bar and is in school by 7:30 the next morning — is still a little surprised when someone likes how she sings. When they ask for her autograph, or when they find the one CD her old blues band ever made, she can’t help but laugh. “I did have one of my customers say he was at a yard sale … and he found the cover of [my] CD. The CD wasn’t inside,” she says, giggling. “I was like ‘Yay! I made it to a yard sale.’” n

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BY LAURA JOHNSON They’ve been practicing since October, attempting to perfect own realms of life; just looking for something different.” every chord, every lyric from songs off In Utero, Nirvana’s final The show made him believe he was capable of creating music album. No amount of playing is going to bring him back. But that again. After an eight-year absence, Nielsen, then 29, picked up his doesn’t mean Nukevana shouldn’t pay homage to singer/guitarist guitar and got back to writing songs. Kurt Cobain’s legacy by performing his music at three different For Wenning, who was still in junior high when Cobain died, venues on three nights this week. Nirvana was her first rock crush. She grew up listening to classical A converging of Mike Nielsen’s project Nuke Venus, which music and contemporary Christian; the band showed her there was for this series of shows includes his adult son Nick, and Moriah more. Wenning, whose solo moniker is Gardening Angel, Nukevana is “Our show is not just going to be a tribute to Nirvana,” Nielsen a one-time-only tribute act not afraid to let says. “It’s a tribute to a loss of people.” things get contemplative. He’s referring to his ex-wife and his Nuke “We are going for a wake kind of feel Venus lead singer, both of whom committed Email getlisted@inlander.com to get your event with this,” says Mike in his sparse Sposuicide, and also Wenning’s mother, who died a listed in the paper and online. We need the kane Valley living room where the group few years ago. details one week prior to our publication date. is practicing. “That’s why we’re playing a “When my mother passed, instead of a much more turned-down set, with no bass or funeral we had a jam session,” Wenning says. drums.” This is how the trio hopes to remember Cobain — nearly 20 They’ve come together to remember a band that deeply imyears after he killed himself, 20 years after In Utero was released, 20 pacted them: Nielsen on electric guitar, Nick on acoustic guitar and years after Nielsen saw Nirvana perform live — by playing music, vocals, and Wenning, who Nielsen describes as sounding like what even if it can’t bring him, or anyone else, back.  would happen if Cat Power took on Cobain. lauraj@inlander.com One of Nielsen’s greatest memories came in December 1993, when he saw Nirvana perform at the Great Western Forum in IngleNukevana (Nirvana tribute band) with Nuke Venus, Gardenwood, Calif. It was the first and last time he would see the band; a ing Angel, Lust for Glory, Jared Munson (comedian), Jordan little more than three months later, Cobain committed suicide. Collins, Jona Gallegos • Thu, Dec. 19, at 7 pm • The Hop! (all“It was the most important show of my life,” Nielsen recalls. ages) • Fri, Dec. 20, at 7 pm • Carr’s Corner • Sat, Dec. 21, at 7 “The energy, the feeling in the place. We were all loners from our pm • Jones Radiator • $5 per night

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DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 57

MUSIC | SOUND ADVICE

ROCK GARAGE VOICE

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ike many bands these days that sing about, or are inspired by, Jesus, Garage Voice would not classify themselves as a Christian band. Instead, the three-piece is a rock ‘n’ roll band that also creates gospel music. At the core of the Seattle group’s sound is a Hammond organ and an especially reverberating guitar. On Garage Voice’s recent album Amenin, things go from an upbeat, almost-Motown feel to something more ambient, building layers of sound. Most of the songs last about two minutes, giving you just the right amount of flavor before switching to the next track. This is the kind of music that isn’t afraid to be spiritual while rocking hard. — LAURA JOHNSON Garage Voice with Scott Ryan • Sat, Dec. 21, at 8 pm • The Bartlett • 228 W. Sprague • $8 • All-ages • thebartlettspokane.com

J = THE INLANDER RECOMMENDS THIS SHOW J = ALL AGES SHOW

Thursday, 12/19

BeVeRly’S, Robert Vaughn BooMeRS ClASSiC RoCK BAR & GRill, DJ Yasmine BuCKhoRn inn, Texas Twister The CellAR, Steve Harris CoeuR D’Alene CASino, PJ Destiny FeDoRA PuB, CdA Charter Academy Jazz & Choir Combos FoRTy-one SouTh (208-265-2000), Truck Mills GiBliAno BRoTheRS, Dueling Pianos J The hoP!, Nukevana (Nirvana Tribute, see story on page 57), Nuke Venus, Gardening Angel, Lust for Glory, Jared Munson, The Colourflies J lAGunA CAFé, Just Plain Darin leFTBAnK Wine BAR, Nick Grow J MooTSy’S, Teen Closet Clothing Drive feat. Mirror Mirror, Ramsey Troxel, Matthew Winters and more J MoSCoW FooD Co-oP, Celebration Strings o’ShAy’S, Open mic J The PhAT houSe, Flannel Fest feat. The Tone Collaborative, Bodhi Drip, Moksha, Tommy G RiCo’S, Palouse Subterranean Blues Band SPlASh, Steve Denny The VAulT SoCiAl CluB AnD eATeRy, DJ Seli ZolA, Cruxie

Friday, 12/20

J The BARTleTT, Like Lions, Bristol, Kevin Long BeVeRly’S, Robert Vaughn The BlinD BuCK (290-6229), DJ Mayhem Bolo’S, The Vibe-Raiders BooMeRS ClASSiC RoCK BAR & GRill, Not Guilty J CARR’S CoRneR, Nukevana (Nirvana Tribute), Nuke Venus,

58 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

COUNTRY A COWBOY CHRISTMAS

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oeur d’Alene’s Sam Platts and the Kootenai Three aren’t afraid to play real country — none of that pop-with-a-dash-of-twang stuff you’d hear on the radio. Instead, the act revs up old-school honky-tonk on a steel guitar, electric guitar, upright bass and drums. They join young country duo Colby Acuff and Justin Sherfey (the reigning U.S. NW Fiddle Champion) Saturday for a cowboy party downtown Spokane at Chateau Rive. Expect Platts’ group to perform many howlin’ numbers off their recentlydropped album, Sundown at Noon, along with sentimental Christmas favorites. —LAURA JOHNSON A Cowboy Christmas with Sam Platts and the Kootenai Three, Acuff & Sherfey • Sat, Dec. 21, at 8 pm • Chateau Rive • 621 W. Mallon Ave. • $10 • All-ages • ticketswest.com

Jordan Collins, Lust for Glory, Jared Munson, Gardening Angel The CellAR, Donny Emerson J ChAiRS CoFFee (340-8787), Open Mic of Open-ness CoeuR D’Alene CASino, Nate Ostrander, The Jam Band ColDWATeR CReeK Wine BAR, Mike & Shana Thompson The CounTRy CluB, Eclectic Approach CuRley’S, Johnny Qlueless eiChARDT’S, Bright Moments J eMMAnuel luTheRAn ChuRCh, Ugly Sweater Christmas Party feat. Lavoy, Pilgrim Band FiZZie MulliGAnS, Phoenix GiBliAno BRoTheRS, Dueling Pianos GRAnDe RonDe CellARS, Songwriters in the Round feat. Laddie Ray Melvin, and more J The hoP!, 12 Raves of Xmas iDAho PouR AuThoRiTy (208-2902280), Charley Packard

iRon hoRSe BAR, Whack A Mole iRV’S, DJ Prophesy J JoneS RADiAToR, Feral Anthem, Jordan Heights, Hey! is for Horses lAGunA CAFé, Robinsong leFTBAnK Wine BAR, Carey Brazil luCKy’S iRiSh PuB, Likes Girls MAx AT MiRABeAu, Bobby Bremer Band MeZZo PAZZo Wine BAR, Maxie Ray Mills nyne, The Divine Jewels PenD D’oReille WineRy, Bridges Home RoADhouSe CounTRy RoCK BAR, Last Chance Band The RoCK BAR AnD lounGe (4433796), Kid Whiskey, DJ JWC SeASonS oF CoeuR D’Alene, Dean Smith ZolA, The Fat Tones

Saturday, 12/21

J The BARTleTT, Garage Voice (See

story above), Scott Ryan BeVeRly’S, Robert Vaughn The BlinD BuCK (290-6229), DJ Daethstar Bolo’S, The Vibe-Raiders BooMeRS ClASSiC RoCK BAR & GRill, Not Guilty CARR’S CoRneR, Bonfire Knights, AG-CP, Banish the Echo-Shaiden, DJ AC The CellAR, Donny Emerson J ChAPS, Just Plain Darin with Tyler Coulston J ChATeAu RiVe, A Cowboy Christmas (See story above) with Sam Platts & The Kootenai Three, Acuff & Sherfey CoeuR D’Alene CASino, Nate Ostrander, The Jam Band ColDWATeR CReeK Wine BAR, Ray Allen The CounTRy CluB, Eclectic Approach CuRley’S, Johnny Qlueless

FiZZie MulliGAnS, Phoenix GiBliAno BRoTheRS, Dueling Pianos The hAnDle BAR (703-5160), Armed & Dangerous J The hoP!, The Nightmare Before Christmas feat. Among Thieves, FAUS, Deviance, Measures, Xingaia, RaisedByWolves, Extortionist, Like Vultures, Honey Badger, Black Tracks, Saxeus iRon hoRSe BAR, Whack A Mole iRV’S, DJ Prophesy JJ’S GRill AnD BReWhouSe (4674267), Maxie Ray Mills J JoneS RADiAToR, Nukevana (Nirvana Tribute), Nuke Venus, Gardening Angel, Jordan Collins, Jona Gallegos J KniTTinG FACToRy, Blue Christmas feat. Sammy Eubanks, Bakin’ Phat lA RoSA CluB, Miah Kohal Band J lAGunA CAFé, Diane Copeland The lARiAT (466-9918), Garrett

Bartley Band LUCKY’S IRISH PUB, Likes Girls  LUXE COFFEEHOUSE, Solstice Celebration feat. Real Life Rockaz, B Radicals, The Tone Collaborative, Bodhi Drip, Soul Symmetry, Moksha, Andy Rumsey and more MAX AT MIRABEAU, Bobby Bremer Band

GET LISTED!

Get your event listed in the paper and online by emailing getlisted@inlander. com. We need the details one week prior to our publication date. NYNE, DJ C-Mad  THE PHAT HOUSE, Paul Abner RED LION HOTEL RIVER INN, Chris Rieser and The Nerve  REVEL 77 (280-0518), Kendall Watson, Greg Mahugh ROADHOUSE COUNTRY ROCK BAR, Last Chance Band THE ROCK BAR AND LOUNGE (4433796), DJ Sonny SEASONS OF COEUR D’ALENE, Dean Smith  THE SHOP, Sea Giant, Black Beacon  THE VIKING BAR AND GRILL, Ugly Sweater Christmas Party feat. Lavoy, The Lion Oh My!, Elephant Gun Riot ZOLA, The Fat Tones

Sunday, 12/22

THE CELLAR, Pat Coast DALEY’S CHEAP SHOTS, Jam Night

with VooDoo Church  THE HOP!, Battle of the Bands feat. Symptoms of Insanity, Reckless Pursuit, Amnija, Rylei Franks, Beyond Today, Keegan Lawler and more MOOSE LOUNGE (208-664-7901), Michael’s Music Technology Circus NORTHERN QUEST CASINO, LeAnn Rimes ZOLA, Kosh and the Hitmen

Monday, 12/23

BOWL’Z BITEZ AND SPIRITZ (3217480), Open mic  CALYPSOS (208-665-0591), Open Mic THE HIVE EVENT CENTER (208-2903048), Moon Taxi  THE HOP!, EDM Generation  THE PHAT HOUSE, Reading Band PJ’S BAR & GRILL, Acoustic Jam with One Man Train Wreck  RICO’S, Open mic ZOLA, Nate Ostrander

Tuesday, 12/24

BEVERLY’S, Robert Vaughn THE CELLAR, Max Daniels  CITY CHURCH (327-0387), Just Plain Darin with Eddie Ramirez FEDORA PUB, Tuesday Night Jam with Truck Mills KELLY’S IRISH PUB, The Powell Brothers LION’S LAIR (456-5678), DJs Nobe and MJ  RED ROOSTER COFFEE CO., Open mic

RICO’S, WSU School of Music Jazz Band THE ROCK BAR AND LOUNGE (4433796), Open mic with Frank Clark SPLASH, Bill Bozly THE VAULT SOCIAL CLUB AND EATERY, DJ Q ZOLA, Dan Conrad and the Urban Achievers

Wednesday, 12/25

BEVERLY’S, Robert Vaughn CARR’S CORNER, DJ WesOne  CHAPS, Land of Voices with Dirk Swartz IRV’S, DJ Prophesy LA ROSA CLUB, Jazz Jam with the Bob Beadling Group  THE PHAT HOUSE, Be Open Mic with Mike Bethely RICO’S, WSU School of Music Jazz Band SOULFUL SOUPS AND SPIRITS, Open mic SUKI YAKI INN (624-0022), One Man Train Wreck THE VAULT SOCIAL CLUB AND EATERY, DJs Freaky Fred and MC Squared ZOLA, The Bucket List

Coming Up ...

JONES RADIATOR, B Radicals, Dec. 27 CARR’S CORNER, The Almost New Year’s Party feat. Embodied Organics, Vante Hendrix, Kilo Savy, Manwithnoname, Wreckless

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Nomad, Raw B, Jhada, DJs J-June and Young Yeti, Dec. 27 NYNE, Hey! Is for Horses, Stone Tobey, Dec. 27 CARR’S CORNER, Invasive, In Denial, Undercard, SJP, Dec. 28 JONES RADIATOR, Sea Giant, Dec. 28 THE PHAT HOUSE, Spokane Drummers Collective, Dec. 29 THE HOP!, Firing Squad, King Scrub, Dirty Savage, Versatile, Wrath, Rez Loyal, Slang, Maniak, Dec. 30 DOWNTOWN CROSSING, NYE with Flying Mammals, Dec. 31 THE BARTLETT, New Year’s Eve with Helado Negro, Moon Talk, Water Monster, Dec. 31 CRUISERS, New Year’s Party feat. The Kristi Kelli Band, Dec. 31 MOOTSY’S, NYE @ Mootsy’s feat. Lavoy, My Pinky Has a Name, Mama Doll, Bandit Train, Dec. 31 CARR’S CORNER, NYE Extravaganza feat. Myth Ship, The Camaros, DJ Case, Dec. 31, 9:30 pm. HILLS’ RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, Gretchen & the Wolf, Dec. 31 JOHN’S ALLEY, Luau Cinder, Dec. 31 ZOLA, Lavoy, Jan. 2, 9 pm. KNITTING FACTORY, In This Moment, Devour the Day, Butcher Babies, All Hail the Yeti, Jan. 4, 7 pm. THE BARTLETT, Open Mic, Jan. 7 CARR’S CORNER, Cold Blooded Tour Kickoff with Dislich, Bloody Gloves, Jan. 8

MUSIC | VENUES 315 MARTINIS • 315 E. Wallace, CdA • 208667-9660 BABY BAR • 827 W. First Ave. • 847-1234 THE BARTLETT • 228 W. Sprague Ave. BEVERLY’S • 115 S. 2nd St., CdA • 208-765-4000 BIGFOOT PUB • 9115 N. Division St. • 467-9638 BING CROSBY THEATER • 901 W. Sprague Ave. • 227-7638 BOLO’S • 116 S. Best Rd. • 891-8995 BOOMERS • 18219 E. Appleway Ave. • 755-7486 BOOTS BAKERY & LOUNGE • 24 W. Main Ave. • 703-7223 BUCER’S • 201 S. Main, Moscow • 208-882-5216 BUCKHORN INN • 13311 Sunset Hwy.• 244-3991 CARR’S CORNER • 230 S. Washington St. • 474-1731 THE CELLAR • 317 E. Sherman, CdA • 208664-9463 CHAPS • 4237 Cheney-Spokane Rd. • 624-4182 CHECKERBOARD BAR • 1716 E. Sprague • 535-4007 COEUR D’ALENE CASINO • 37914 S. Nukwalqw Rd., Worley • 800-523-2467 COLDWATER CREEK WINE BAR • 311 N. 1st Ave., Sandpoint • 208-263-6971 THE COUNTRY CLUB • 216 E. Coeur d’Alene Ave. • 208-676-2582 CURLEY’S • 26433 W. Hwy. 53 • 208-773-5816 DALEY’S CHEAP SHOTS • 6412 E. Trent • 535-9309 EICHARDT’S • 212 Cedar St., Sandpoint • 208263-4005 FEDORA PUB • 1726 W. Kathleen, CdA • 208765-8888 FIRST STREET BAR • 122 E. First St., Deer Park • 276-2320 FIZZIE MULLIGANS • 331 W. Hastings Rd. • 466-5354 THE FLAME • 2401 E. Sprague Ave. • 534-9121 FOX THEATER • 1001 W. Sprague • 624-1200 GIBLIANO BROS. • 718 W. Riverside • 315-8765 THE GRAIL • 4720 E. Seltice Way, CdA • 208665-5882 GRANDE RONDE CELLARS • 906 W. 2nd • 455-8161 THE HOP! • 706 N. Monroe St. • 368-4077 IRON HORSE • 407 E. Sherman Ave., CdA • 208-667-7314 IRV’S BAR • 415 W. Sprague Ave. • 624-4450 JOHN’S ALLEY • 114 E. 6th, Moscow • 208883-7662 JONES RADIATOR • 120 E. Sprague • 747-6005 KELLY’S IRISH PUB • 726 N. Fourth St., CdA • 208-667-1717 KNITTING FACTORY • 911 W. Sprague Ave. • 244-3279 LAGUNA CAFÉ • 4302 S. Regal St. • 448-0887 LA ROSA CLUB • 105 S. First Ave., Sandpoint • 208-255-2100 LATAH BISTRO • 4241 Cheney-Spokane Rd. • 838-8338 LEFTBANK WINE BAR • 108 N. Washington • 315-8623 LUCKY’S IRISH PUB • 408 W. Sprague Ave. • 747-2605 LUXE COFFEEHOUSE • 1017 W. First Ave. • 642-5514 MAX AT MIRABEAU • 1100 N. Sullivan Rd. • 924-9000 MEZZO PAZZO WINE BAR • 2718 E. 57th • 863-9313 MOOTSY’S • 406 W. Sprague • 838-1570 MOSCOW FOOD CO-OP • 121 E. Fifth St. • 208882-8537 NORTHERN QUEST • 100 N. Hayford • 242-7000 NYNE • 232 W. Sprague Ave. • 474-1621 THE SHOP • 924 S. Perry St. • 534-1647 O’SHAY’S • 313 E. CdA Lake Dr. • 208-667-4666 PACIFIC AVENUE PIZZA • 2001 W. Pacific Ave. • 624-0236 PEND D’OREILLE WINERY • 220 Cedar St., Sandpoint • 208-265-8545 THE PHAT HOUSE • 417 S. Browne • 443-4103 PJ’S BAR & GRILL • 1717 N. Monroe St. • 328-2153 RED LION RIVER INN • 700 N. Division St. • 326-5577 RED ROOM LOUNGE • 521 W. Sprague Ave. • 838-7613 REPUBLIC BREWING • 26 Clark Ave. • 775-2700 RICO’S PUB • 200 E. Main, Pullman • 332-6566 THE ROADHOUSE • 20 N. Raymond • 413-1894 SEASONS OF COEUR D’ALENE • 209 E. Lakeside Ave. • 208-664-8008 THE SHOP • 924 S. Perry St. • 534-1647 SOULFUL SOUPS & SPIRITS • 117 N. Howard St. • 459-1190 SPOKANE ARENA • 720 W. Mallon • 279-7000 SPLASH • 115 S. 2nd St., CdA • 208-765-4000 STUDIO K• 2810 E. 29th Ave. • 534-9317 THE SWAMP • 1904 W. Fifth Ave. • 458-2337 THE VAULT • 120 N. Wall St. • 863-9597 THE VIKING • 1221 N. Stevens St. • 315-4547 THE WAVE • 525 W. First Ave. • 747-2023 ZOLA • 22 W. Main Ave. • 624-2416

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 59

FILM MAGIC MARATHON

Getting into the Christmas season means watching the Christmas classics. Opportunity knocks in the form of a Christmasthemed film festival at the IMAX Theater in Riverfront Park, and it’s for a good cause. Admission is free, but filmgoers are asked to donate one non-perishable food item to go to the Second Harvest Food Bank, which experiences high demand for its services this time of year. Films being screened daily are Elf (3 pm), Disney’s version of A Christmas Carol (1 pm), How the Grinch Stole Christmas (5 pm) and Arthur Christmas (11 am), an account of how Santa really gets around the world in one night. Seating is first come, first served, but be sure to bring the whole family. Also of note — films aren’t shown in the IMAX format. — EMERA L. RILEY Riverfront Park Holiday Film Festival • Dec. 21-24 and Dec. 26-29 • Free with food bank donation • Riverfront Park • 705 N. Howard • spokaneriverfrontpark.com • 625-6601

60 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

HOLIDAY SINGIN’ AT THE BING

FILM FAVORITE THINGS

Christmas at the Bing • Sat, Dec. 21 at 7:30 pm • $12-$22 • Bing Crosby Theater • 901 W. Sprague • bingcrosbytheater.com

Sound of Music Sing-A-Long • Sun, Dec. 22, at 5 pm • $25 • INB Performing Arts Center • 334 W. Spokane Falls Blvd. • ticketswest.com

The thing about Christmastime is that there’s never a shortage of holiday concerts to get your holiday music fix. This year, the nonprofit Friends of the Bing have pulled together an impressive lineup of regional artistic and musical talent to perform in the first annual Christmas at the Bing holiday concert. The cabaret-style concert is produced in part by Jadd Davis, recently named the artistic director for the reborn Coeur d’Alene Summer Theatre. Hosting the musical extravaganza is local Broadway vet Douglas Webster. The event also includes a toy drive to benefit Shriners Hospital for Children Spokane. — CHEY SCOTT

Ever feel like climbing every mountain and twirling around while belting out “the hills are alive with the sound of music”? Well, there’s still time to do that, but if you find it too cold to trek up a hill, stay inside and sing along with the classic Rodgers and Hammerstein tunes at Sunday’s Sound of Music Sing-a-Long at the INB Performing Arts Center. Come dressed up as your favorite character or something even more creative, and potentially win some amazing prizes. Even if you don’t dress up, you’ll still get a bag of props to use at certain points throughout the film. — LAURA JOHNSON

GET LISTED!

Email getlisted@inlander.com to get your event listed in the paper and online. We need the details one week prior to our publication date.

7 CRUISE EAGLE TERRITORY

Every year as they migrate south for the season, dozens of bald eagles stop by Lake Coeur d’Alene in December and January to feast on spawning Kokanee salmon. (The record number of eagles counted by wildlife biologists on one day was 273 on Dec. 29, 2011.) Take a two-hour ride from the Coeur d’Alene Resort to Wolf Lodge Bay to marvel at the eagles up close from the comfort of a heated cruise boat. Be mesmerized by the gracefully circling birds of prey, and go back ashore with a greater appreciation for what an honor it is to live on this earth. — LISA WAANANEN Eagle Watch Cruises • Sat, Dec. 21, Sun, Dec. 22 and daily from Dec. 26-Jan. 1 at 1 pm • $22.75 (discounts for seniors and children) • Coeur d’Alene Resort • 115 S. Second St. • cdacruises.com • 208-664-7268

COMEDY HOMEGROWN LAUGHS

It’s perfectly fine to leave Spokane for bigger, brighter and better things. We just ask that you come back once in a while. The kind folks at the Blue Door Theatre are welcoming back some local funny people who’ve left town in recent years, including F. Tyler Burnet — who’s presently on the road with West Side Story — television actor Bob Bledsoe, writer/actor Rick Steadman (pictured) and comics Tom Olsen and Lawra Gosselin-Harris. The night of giggles features stand-up comedy and some improv, so you can bask in these folks’ glory before they head back out after the holidays. — MIKE BOOKEY Return of the Natives • Fri, Dec. 20 at 7 pm • $7, reservations recommended • Blue Door Theatre • 815 W. Garland • bluedoortheatre.com • 747-7045

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 61

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62 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

COMEDY

MEGHAN FLARITY Live stand-up comedy. Dec. 20-21 at 8 pm. $12. Uncle D’s Comedy Underground, 2721 N. Market bluznews.com/comedians (483-7300) OPEN MIC COMEDY Live stand-up comedy. Fridays at 8 pm. Free. Red Dragon Chinese, 1406 W. Third Ave. reddragondelivery.com (838-6688) RETURN OF THE NATIVES A night of stand-up and improvised comedy featuring: F. Tyler Burnet, Rick Steadman, Tom Olson and Bob Bledsoe. Show is not rated and may not be suitable for all ages. Dec. 20, 10 pm. $7. Blue Door Theatre, 815 W. Garland Ave. bluedoortheatre.com (747-7045) SEASONS GREETINGS Live comedy improv show using holiday cards and messages for inspiration. Fridays at 8 pm through Dec. 27. $7-$9. Blue Door Theatre, 815 W. Garland Ave. bluedoortheatre.com (747-7045) SAFARI Short-form improv games based on audience suggestions. Allages. Saturdays at 9 pm. $7. Blue Door Theatre, 815 W. Garland Ave. bluedoortheatre.com (747-7045) LIVE COMEDY Live stand-up comedy shows. Sundays at 9 pm. Goodtymes, 9214 E. Mission Ave. (928-1070) ALL-AGES COMEDY OPEN MIC: Second and fourth Thurs. of every month at 6 pm. Free. Boots Bakery & Lounge, 24 W. Main. bootsbakery.com (703-7223) GUFFAW YOURSELF! Open-mic comedy, including stand-up, sketch, improv or anything weird. Five minutes max per performer. Every other Thurs., 10 pm. Free. Neato Burrito, 827 W. First Ave. facebook.com/pages/Neato-Burrito/115509695145435 (847-1234) COMEDIAN MEG O’ROURKE The up-and-coming New York comedian presents an evening of stand-up. Also includes music by Hey! is for Horses and Stone Tobey. Dec. 27, 8 pm. Free. nYne, 232 W. Sprague Ave. (474-1621) GABE RUTLEDGE Live stand-up comedy. Dec. 27-28 at 8 pm. $12. Uncle D’s Comedy Underground, 2721 N. Market bluznews.com/comedians (483-7300)

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EVENTS | CALENDAR

GAISER HOLIDAY LIGHTS The annual holiday lights display showcases the Gaiser Conservatory’s collection decked out in thousands of lights. Best viewing after 4 pm. Hosted by the Friends of Manito. Through Dec. 22, 8 am-7:30 pm. Free, donations accepted. Manito Park, 1800 S. Grand Blvd. friendsofmanito. org (456-8038) HOSPICE TREE Hospice of Spokane hosts the Community Memorial Tree throughout the holiday season for community members to honor their loved ones by decorating a paper dove in their memory. Through Dec. 22, MonSat from 11 am-7 pm and Sun from 12:30-4:30 pm. Third floor. River Park Square, 808 W. Main Ave. hospiceofspokane.org (444-1058) JOURNEY TO THE NORTH POLE 40-minute family lake cruises with a visit to Santa, during which he reads children’s names from the “nice list.” Cruises depart daily at 5:30 pm, 6:30 pm and 7:30 pm through Jan. 1. $5/ children 6-12, kids under 5/free, adults/$20, seniors/$19. The Coeur d’Alene Resort, 115 S. 2nd Ave. cdalakecruises.com (208-664-7268)

MLK DAY VIDEO ESSAY CONTEST Film essay contest hosted by the Martin Luther King, Jr. Family Outreach Center, open to high school and college students. Deadline Jan. 3, 2014. Free. Martin Luther King Junior Outreach Center, 845 S. Sherman St. facebook.com/mlkspokane/events (455-8722 Ext. 202) SANTA AT AVISTA STADIUM Photos with Santa and the Spokane Indians’ mascot Otto, holiday refreshments and more. Dec. 19 from 4-6 pm. Free. Avista Stadium, 602 N. Havana St. (343-6813) SANTA EXPRESS The annual kids’ gift store benefits the Vanessa Behan Crisis Nursery and features allowancefriendly items for children to purchase for friends and family. Through Dec. 23, Mon-Sat from 10 am-8 pm, Sun from 11 am-6 pm. Crescent Court Bldg., Skywalk level. $0.50-$8. Crescent Court, 707 W. Main Ave. vanessabehan.org SANTA’S FIREFIGHTER HELPERS Visit Santa and his local firefighter helpers at open houses at several North Spokane fire stations, offering treats, Santa photos and a food drive. Dec. 19-23. Times and locations vary, see website for more info. Free. scfd9.org (466-4602) THURSDAY NIGHT DANCE Community dances featuring live music by local bands. Thurs from 7:30-9:45 pm. $5.50. Southside Senior & Community Center, 3151 E. 27th Ave. sssac.org (535-0803) WOMEN & CHILDREN’S FREE RESTAURANT Volunteers are needed as prep cooks, servers, dishwashers, food platers and to work various other shifts during the week, Mon-Fri. Positions are weekly or biweekly, and a food handlers card is required. Submit a volunteer application online. wcfrspokane. org (324-1995)

WEEKEND COUNTDOWN

Get the scoop on this weekend’s events with our newsletter. Visit Inlander.com/newsletter to sign up.

BOOKMOBILE OPEN HOUSE Learn more about the library’s outreach services and participate in games, crafts and more. Dec. 20, 9:30 am-3 pm. Free. Hayden Library, 8385 N. Government Way. (208-772-7405) CAMPBELL HOUSE HOLIDAYS See what the historic mansion would have been like during the holidays in 1910, with local actors portraying the home’s residents and visitors. Dec. 20-22, Dec. 26-29 and Jan. 1-5 from 12-4 pm each day. $5-$10, included in regular admission. Northwest Museum of Arts & Culture, 2316 W. First Ave. northwestmuseum.org (363-5355) HELP THE HUNGRY FOOD SORTING Join other volunteers to sort and pack produce and other bulk food items for delivery to local emergency food outlets. Ages 14+. Shift dates and times vary, sign up online. Second Harvest Food Bank, 1234 E. Front Ave. 2-harvest.org (252-6267) MOBIUS KIDS SHOP-N-DROP Parents can drop of children at Mobius for holiday-themed activities while they finish Christmas shopping. Dec. 20 from 1-4 pm and 5:30-8:30 pm. All ages of children welcome (must be able to use restroom independently). $15/child. Mobius Kids, 808 W. Main Ave. mobiusspokane.org (321-7124) WINTER SOLSTICE DANCE Community dance featuring live music by Variety Pak, appetizers, drinks, prizes and

more. Dec. 20, 7-10 pm. $6-$8. Southside Senior & Community Center, 3151 E. 27th Ave. sssac.org (535-0803) CAROLING IN THE NEST Community marshmallow roast, holiday beverages, Christmas carols and food from Veraci Pizza. Dec. 21, 5-8 pm. Free. The Nest at Kendall Yards, 1335 Summit Parkway. facebook.com/ events/1422757267958015 NORTH POLE EXPRESS Train rides through Riverfront Park with a stop at the North Pole to visit Santa, with hot chocolate, cookies, crafts, and more. Reservations recommended. Children ages 5 or younger free with adult. Dec. 21-22. Departs at noon, 2 pm, 4 pm (also at 6 pm Saturday only). $12. Riverfront Park, 705 N. Howard. (625-6600) SING-A-LONG WITH MUDGY & SANTA Second annual holiday sing-a-long lead by children’s author Susan Nipp, author of the “Mudgy & Millie” book and the “Wee Sing” series. Dec. 21, 1 pm. Free. Coeur d’Alene Public Library, 702 E. Front. cdalibrary.org (208-769-2380) CAROLING IN WEST CENTRAL All are welcome for caroling in the West Central Spokane neighborhood. Meet at Salem Lutheran Church. Dec. 22, 5 pm. Free. Salem Lutheran Church, 1428 W. Broadway Ave. salemlutheranspokane. com (328-6280) SCHOOL’S OUT DAY CAMP Day camps during winter vacation include activities such as swimming, rock climbing, crafts, games and more. Lunch and snacks provide. Ages 6-13. Dec. 23 and Dec. 30, 9 am-4 pm. $45/public. Kroc Center, 1765 W. Golf Course Rd. krocccda.org (208-667-1865) SOAP FOR HOPE DRIVE The sixth annual toiletry drive benefits local charities, including Hope House/StreetWise, Hearth Homes, Transitions for Women, I-CARE Children and Family Advocacy. Donations can be dropped off at any local AAA office through Dec. 31. AAA Downtown Spokane, 1717 W. Fourth Ave. aaa.com/soapforhope MOBIUS KIDS’ BOXING DAY Celebrate the Canadian holiday of Boxing Day by building a box city across the museum floor. Dec. 26, 10 am-1 pm. Free with museum admission. Mobius Kids, 808 W. Main Ave. mobiusspokane.org (6245437) COOL CAMP Spokane Valley Parks & Rec hosts a winter day camp for kids, ages 6-11, with activities, crafts, games and field trips. Dec. 30-Jan. 2 from 8 am-5 pm. Online registration available, space is limited. $30/day or $100 full camp. CenterPlace Regional Event Center, 2426 N. Discovery Place Dr. spokanevalley.org/recreation (688-0300) FIRST NIGHT SPOKANE Spokane’s annual family New Year’s celebration features more than 150 performers at 40 downtown locations including live music, art demonstrations, comedy shows and free ice skating. Dec. 31, 7 pm-midnight. $5-$18, kids under 10 free. Downtown Spokane. firstnightspokane.org (456-0580) FIRST DAY First Night attendees (button required) receive free admission to the museum to visit current exhibits and see live performances by local musicians and performers. Jan. 1, 10 am-4 pm. Northwest Museum of Arts & Culture, 2316 W. First Ave. northwestmuseum.org (456-3931) SCHOOL’S OUT DAY CAMP Children’s programming when school is not in session including activities like swimming,

rock climbing, cooking, crafts, games and more. Lunch and snack provided. Ages 6-13. Discount available for Kroc members. Jan. 2-3 at 9 am each day. $45. Kroc Center, 1765 W. Golf Course Rd. kroccda.org (208-667-1865)

FILM

ARTHUR CHRISTMAS Screening of the holiday animated film, with free hot cider, popcorn and hot chocolate. Dec. 19, 6 pm. Free. Pilgrim’s Natural Market, 1316 N. Fourth St, CdA. pilgrimsmarket. com (208-676-9730) IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE Screening of the Frank Capra holiday film. Dec. 19-22 at 7 pm. $3-$6. Kenworthy Performing Arts Centre, 508 S. Main St., Moscow. kenworthy.org (208-882-4127) RIVERFRONT PARK HOLIDAY FILM FESTIVAL Films to be screened daily include “Arthur Christmas” (11 am), “Disney’s A Christmas Carol” (1 pm), “Elf” (3 pm) and “Dr. Seuss’s How the Grinch Stole Christmas” (5 pm). Dec. 21-24 and Dec. 26-29. All seating is first come, first served. Movies not shown in IMAX format. Please bring a non-perishable food donation to benefit 2nd Harvest Food Bank. Free. Riverfront Park, 705 N. Howard St. (625-6600) DOWNTON ABBEY SEASON 4 PREVIEW Friends of Idaho Public Television host a preview screening of the first hour of Downton Abbey’s season 4 premiere, with hors d’oeuvres, no host bar and a costume contest. Jan. 4, 3 pm. $15. Hampton Inn & Suites, 1500 W. Riverstone Dr., CdA. (800-543-6868)

FOOD

COMMELLINI ESTATE RESTAURANT NIGHT Commellini Estate hosts its last restaurant night of the year, to a backdrop of festive holiday decor. Featuring a pre-selected 5 course meal (sold out) and a happy hour from 3-5 pm and 9-11 pm. Fri, Dec. 20. $3-$35. [Dinner reservations now full, happy hour features open seating.] Commellini Estate, 14715 N. Dartford Dr. commelliniestate.com (466-0667) NO-LI BREWHOUSE TOURS See what goes on behind the scenes and how NoLi’s beer is made. Fridays at 4:30 pm. Free. No-Li Brewhouse, 1003 E. Trent Ave. nolibrewhouse.com (242-2739) RED BLENDS Tasting/wine education class featuring 8 varieties of red wine blends. Dec. 20 and 21 at 7 pm. $20, reservations required. Rocket Market, 726 E. 43rd Ave. rocketmarket.com (343-2253) UGLY SWEATER PARTY Free samples of whiskey and fine spirits, cocktail tastings ($5). Food bank donations also being collected. Ages 21+. Dec. 20, 7 pm. Free admission. Enoteca, 112 E. Seltice Way, Ste. C. corkjoy.com (208457-9885) VINO! WINE TASTING Friday features Nicholas Feuillatte Champagne, Saturday features Chateau de Lascaux; tastings include cheese and crackers. Dec. 20, 3-6:30 pm and Dec. 21, 2-4:30 pm. $15/event. Vino! A Wine Shop, 222 S. Washington. vinowine.com (838-1229) 12 BARS OF CHRISTMAS PUB CRAWL Pub crawl to 12 downtown Spokane area bars, with games, drink specials and a finisher t-shirt. Ages 21+ Dec. 21, 7 pm. $15. Downtown Spokane. bestspokanebars.com WINTER ALES TASTING Sample winter

beers to celebrate the Winter Solstice. Dec. 21. $5. Huckleberry’s Natural Market, 926 S. Monroe St. huckleberrysnaturalmarket.com (509-624-1349) CHRISTMAS DINNER AT THE DAVENPORT Favorite and traditional holiday dishes from the Davenport’s kitchen are served a la carte in the Palm Court Grill and the Safari Room. Reservations highly suggested. Dec. 25, 12-8 pm. Prices vary. Davenport Hotel, 10 S. Post St. davenporthotelcollection.com (4558888) WINE SPECTATOR’S TOP 100 Sample a line-up of wines that scored top marks in Wine Spectator magazine. Dec. 27 and 28 at 7 pm. $20, reservations required. Rocket Market, 726 E. 43rd Ave. rocketmarket.com (343-2253)

MUSIC

TRADITIONS OF CHRISTMAS Musicalstyle performance featuring dancing and singing of traditional Christmas songs from around the world. Also featuring Patty Duke and her husband as Mr. and Mrs. Claus. Through Dec. 23, Thurs-Sat at 7 pm, also Sat at 3 pm, Sun at 3 pm and Mon, Dec. 23 at 1 pm. $20$33. Kroc Center, 1765 W. Golf Course Rd. traditionsofchristmasnw.com (208391-2867) CHRISTMAS CABARET FUNDRAISER Variety show fundraiser event hosted by Lilac City Performing Arts to benefit its next performance “Tape.” Dec. 20, 7:30 pm. $10-$15. Luxe Coffeehouse, 1017 W. First Ave. facebook.com/luxecoffeehouse (624-5514) HARMONY FOR THE HOLIDAYS Holiday music and light opera featuring internationally acclaimed vocalists Jonathan Mancheni and Isabella Ivy. Proceeds benefit Catholic Charities Foundation and Second Harvest Food Bank. Dec. 20, 8 pm. $25. Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague Ave. bingcrosbytheater.com (227-7404)

ENTRÉE

Get the scoop on the local food scene with our Entrèe newsletter. Visit Inlander.com/newsletter to sign up. CHRISTMAS AT THE BING Holiday concert hosted by Douglas Webster, with performances by Krista Curry, Jenny Shotwell, Chelsea LeValley, and locals Krista Kubicek and Max Mendez. Dec. 21, 7:30 pm. $12-$22. Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague Ave. bingcrosbytheater.com (227-7638) A MUSICAL DREAMTIME JOURNEY 18th annual candlelight concert with Michael Marsolek & Lawrence Duncan, celebrating the winter solstice and featuring a variety of world instruments and sounds. Dec. 21, 7 pm. $12$15. South Perry Yoga, 915 S. Perry St. southperryoga.com (406-370-3339) PAUL ABNER GUITAR SERIES Concerts by the local Grammy-hopeful soloist Saturdays at 2 pm. Free. Rocket Bakery, 157 S. Howard St. rocketspokane.com (838-3887) SPOKANE SYMPHONY SuperPops Series: “Holiday Pops Celebration” feat. conductor Morihiko Nakahara, the Symphony Chorale and Spokane Area Children’s Choirs. Dec. 21 at 8 pm, Dec. 22 at 2 pm. $26-$62. Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox, 1001 W. Sprague. spokanesymphony.org (624-1200)

WINTER SOLSTICE DINNER & CONCERT “The Memoirs of Winter” featuring music by Scott Kent and Roger Johnson. Dec. 21, 6-8 pm. Bank Left Gallery, 100 S. Bridge St. bankleftgallery.com (878-1800) SOUND OF MUSIC SING-A-LONG Screening of the classic holiday film with subtitles for the audience to sing along, as well as bags of props and a costume contest. Dec. 22, 5 pm. $25. INB Performing Arts Center, 334 W. Spokane Falls Blvd. inbpac.com (2797000) SPIRIT OF SPOKANE CHORUS Local women’s chorus specializing in fourpart a capella harmony in a barbershop style. Meets on Tues. at 6:45 pm. Opportunity Presbyterian Church, 202 N. Pines Rd. (218-4799) SPOKANE SYMPHONY Annual New Year’s Eve performance of Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony featuring the Spokane Symphony Chorale. Dec. 31, 7:30 pm. $23-$28. Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox, 1001 W. Sprague. spokanesymphony.org (624-1200) PUTTIN’ ON THE RITZ The Spokane Symphony’s formal New Year’s Eve party features live music with the Master Class Jazz Orchestra and a champagne toast at midnight. All proceeds benefit the Symphony. Dec. 31, 9 pm. $65-$75. Davenport Hotel, 10 S. Post St. spokanesymphonyassoc.org (6241200) SPOKANE AREA YOUTH CHOIRS AUDITIONS Second semester rehearsals for new members ages 7-18. Interview/ audition schedule now open, through Jan. 15. Free. Westminster Congregational United Church of Christ, 411 S. Washington. SAYChoirs.org (624-7992) AARON ST. CLAIR NICHOLSON Concert featuring Opera Coeur d’Alene’s Assistant Director. Jan. 4, 7:30 pm. $15$20. Jacklin Arts & Cultural Center, 405 N. William St., Post Falls. thejacklincenter.org (208-457-8950)

SEASONAL

CDA RESORT HOLIDAY LIGHT SHOW The 27th annual holiday lights display features more than 1.5 million lights, and is the largest on-water display of its kind in the U.S. Through Jan. 1, 2014. Lighting ceremony, parade and fireworks show on Nov. 29 at 5 pm. The Coeur d’Alene Resort, 115 S. 2nd Ave. cdaresort.com (208-765-4000) DASHING THROUGH DOWNTOWN Enjoy downtown Spokane by horse and carriage, sponsored by STCU. Through Dec. 24, Fri from 3-8 pm, Sat-Sun from noon-5 pm, and Monday, Dec. 24, from noon-3 pm. Corner of N. Wall St. and W. Main Ave. Free. Downtown Spokane. downtownspokane.org BLING! IN THE NEW YEAR New Year’s Eve party featuring live music, DJs, drinks, prizes and a five-course preevent dinner ($100). Reservations for VIP or dinner tickets recommended. Dec. 31, 9 pm. $50-$100. Lincoln Center, 1316 N. Lincoln St. thelincolncenterspokane.com (327-8000) NEW YEAR’S EVE JOYA-E SERVICE “Bell of the Last Night” New Year’s observance in the Buddhist tradition. The Japanese Kansho bell is run 108 times to ring out the old year and ring in the new. All are welcome to attend. Dec. 31, 7-8 pm. Free. Spokane Buddhist Temple, 927 S. Perry St. SpokaneBuddhistTemple.org (270-5308)

DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 63

RELATIONSHIPS

Advice Goddess WIMP DADDY

AMY ALKON

A woman wrote you about flirting relentlessly with a male classmate who seemed interested in her but may have been too timid to ask her out. You asked her, “If a man can’t endure a possible 10 seconds of rejection, is he the man you want with you when danger rears its head?” Absent a link between shyness and an inability to defend a woman in danger, I think you’re being unfair to shy guys. —Irked

If timidity were useful in defending people in danger, police sergeants would announce to their beat cops, “Okay, everybody, go out there and hide in the back seat of your patrol car!” You’re right that physical courage — willingness to risk physical pain — is different from emotional courage: willingness to risk rejection or other social pain. But they’re more related than you think. Brain imaging research by UCLA’s Naomi Eisenberger and Matthew Lieberman finds that the same regions of the brain that are activated by physical pain are activated by social pain, and Eisenberger reports that “individuals who are more sensitive to one kind of pain are also more sensitive to the other.” Further pointing to a connection, what’s good for a sprained ankle seems good for a sprained ego. In research Eisenberger collaborated on, 500 milligrams of acetaminophen (think Tylenol) taken twice daily was actually found to diminish emotional pain. So, no, it isn’t a stretch to suspect that a guy who shrinks from social ouchies might respond to physical danger as if his spirit animal were the breadcrumb. There’s this notion that the shy guy approaches “the chase” like it’s the “lie there like cold salmon,” simply because he isn’t a people person. That actually describes an introvert — somebody energized by being alone and easily overstimulated in a crowd but who isn’t necessarily afraid to hit on a girl he’s interested in. But a shy person, instead of having self-esteem, has “what other people think of me”-esteem. This means a woman’s rejection isn’t just a bummer; it’s a crushing confirmation of his worthlessness as anything more than a container of salable plasma. When a guy’s male role model appears to be grape jelly, it isn’t a woman’s cue to do all the work to make a relationship happen. This is dating, not a pet adoption. Besides, you get what you settle for. A guy desperate for approval is a guy a woman can never count on — to show her who he really is, to stand up for what he believes in, or, maybe, to even know what he believes (without sticking a wet finger in the air). A guy like this isn’t someone a woman can respect and admire. That’s essential, because real love involves having a crush on a person as a human being, not taking pity on him for his shortcomings. The shy guy to have is the one who’s worked on himself and come out the other side — who maybe still fears asking a woman out but manages to do it anyway. This tells her something about her — that he wants her more than he wants to avoid rejection — and something about him: that he has the qualities women look for in a man — courage and character and not just the really basic stuff like a Y chromosome and an ability for point-and-shoot urination.

LICKING FOR LOVE

I went on a first date to a Japanese restaurant. My date kept licking his fingers clean. All his fingers. One by one. He’s otherwise a truly great guy, but I don’t know whether I can date someone with such weird table manners. —Shocked Coyotes lick their paws for good reason — because there’s no waiter to bring them a warm washcloth in a little dish. When an adult human does this on the first date — the date we all know is scored by a team of invisible judges in the mind of the person we’re with — you really have to wonder. As for whether this guy’s dining behavior will be a deal breaker, when you don’t have an answer, the best answer is usually waiting and collecting information until you do. So go on a few more dates. See whether he sticks his snout in the gravy boat. How you ultimately respond will probably depend on both the strength of your gag reflex and how old you are. Women in their early 20s will ditch a guy if his cowlick grows in the wrong direction. Women in their 50s and beyond understand that “truly great guys” are in short supply, and they come to appreciate the little things in a man, such as a pulse, bladder control, and the ability to remain awake throughout sex. n ©2013, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. • Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave, #280, Santa Monica, CA 90405 or email AdviceAmy@aol.com (www.advicegoddess.com)

64 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

EVENTS | CALENDAR

SPORTS & OUTDOORS

WINTER WARRIOR TOURNAMENT Second annual regional wrestling tournament for athletes ages 5-18. Dec. 20 starting at 5:30 pm and Dec. 21 at 9 am. $5-$10 spectator admission. Spokane Convention Center, 334 W. Spokane Falls Blvd. winterwarriorwrestling.com (456-5812) BENEFIT YOGA CLASS Free yoga class with a non-perishable or monetary donation to benefit the Moscow Food Bank. Dec. 21 at 10 am. By donation. Moscow Yoga Center, 525 S. Main St. moscowyogacenter.com (208-8838315) DECEMBERWEEN This month’s Swamp Ride group bike ride includes live music, drink specials, free swag and more. Dec. 21, meets at 8 pm, ride departs at 9 pm. Free. Swamp Tavern, 1904 W. Fifth Ave. facebook.com/ events/208824242636683 (458-2337) SPOKANE TABLE TENNIS Ping-pong club meets Mon and Wed from 7-9:30 pm; Sat from 1-4 pm. $2. North Park Racquet Club, 8121 N. Division St. spokanetabletennis.com (768-1780) SPOKANE BADMINTON CLUB Meets Sun from 4:30-7 pm and Wed from 7-10 pm. $6/visit. West Central Community Center, 1603 N. Belt St. wccc.myspokane.net/ (448-5694) SPOKANE TABLE TENNIS CLUB Pingpong club meets Wed from 6:30-9 pm and Sun from 1:30-4 pm. $2/visit. Southside Senior & Community Center, 3151 E. 27th Ave. sssac.org (456-3581) FOURTH FRIDAY PUB PEDDLERS: Meets the fourth Friday of the month at 7 pm, departs at 8 pm. The Swamp, 1904 W. Fifth Ave. pubpeddlers. blogspot.com (922-3312) SPOKANE CHIEFS Hockey game vs. the Kootenay Ice. Dec. 28, 7:05 pm. $10-$20. Spokane Arena, 720 W. Mallon Ave. spokanearena.com (279-7000) FIRST DAY HIKE The Wash. State Parks & Recreation Commission hosts guided New Year’s Day hikes at select state parks. Snowshoeing offered at Mt. Spokane State Park, starting at 10 am. (Sno-Park and Groomed Trail permits also required). Bowl & Pitcher River Trail hike at RSP, starting at 1 pm. Free; Discovery Pass required. Riverside State Park Bowl & Pitcher, 4427 N. Aubrey L. White Parkway. parks.wa.gov/ events. SPOKANE CHIEFS Hockey game vs. the Victoria Royals. Jan. 3, 7:05 pm. $10-$20. Spokane Arena, 720 W. Mallon Ave. spokanearena.com (279-7000) MEDIEVAL & RENAISSANCE MARTIAL ARTS 12-week beginner’s course to facilitate awareness of these historical fighting forms, including fundamental concepts, movements and techniques. Ages 16+. Jan. 4-March 22. $100. Deutsches Haus, 25 W. Third Ave. ironcrown.us (385-8710) SPOKANE CHIEFS Hockey game vs. the Everett Silvertips. Jan. 4, 7:05 pm. $10-$20. Spokane Arena, 720 W. Mallon Ave. spokanearena.com (279-7000) SPOKANE SIZZLER Indoor co-ed sixon-six volleyball tournament. Jan. 4-5. Ages 18+. $375/team before Dec. 16. Spokane Convention Center, 334 W. Spokane Falls Blvd. spokanesizzler.com (456-5812)

THEATER

AWAY IN A BASEMENT A holidaythemed musical comedy starring the lovable Church Basement Ladies. Dec. 19-Jan. 5, Wed-Fri at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. Select Thurs (Dec. 26, Jan. 2) and Sat (Dec. 21, 28, Jan. 4) matinees at 2 pm. Christmas Eve show Dec. 24 at 2 pm. $12-$28. Interplayers Theatre, 174 S. Howard St. interplayerstheatre.org (455-7529) A CHRISTMAS CABARET Featuring Ellen Travolta, an evening of music, stories and laughter, also with Mark Cotter and Jack Bannon. Through Dec. 21, Thurs-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 5 pm. $20-$25. The Coeur d’Alene Resort, 115 S. 2nd Ave. achristmascabaret.com (208-435-4000) THE CHRISTMAS SCHOONER Holiday family musical. Through Dec. 22, ThuSat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $22-$30. Spokane Civic Theatre, 1020 N. Howard St. spokanecivictheatre.com (3252507) THE SANTALAND DIARIES Holidaythemed, one-man comedy show, written by David Sedaris. Through Dec. 22, Thurs-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $11-$17. Lake City Playhouse, 1320 E. Garden Ave. lakecityplayhouse.org (208-667-1323) THE BEST CHRISTMAS PAGEANT EVER Performance of the holiday musical. Through Dec. 22, Fri-Sat at 7 pm, Sun at 3 pm. $5-$12. Pend Oreille Playhouse, 240 N. Union Ave. pendoreilleplayers.org (447-9900) THE LION, THE WITCH & THE WARDROBE: Stage adaptation of the classic children’s fantasy story by C.S. Lewis. Through Dec. 22, Fri-Sat at 7 pm, Sat at 4 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $8-$10. Theater Arts for Children, 2114 N. Pines, Ste. 3S. theaterartsforchildren.org (995-6718)

VISUAL ARTS

29TH AVENUE ARTWORKS’ CHRISTMAS SHOW Artwork by Jason Sheldon, Tom Wakeley, Tracy Stone, Laurie Klein, Chris Heitstuman, John Franek, Peter Presnail and Deb Sheldon. TuesSat from 10 am-5 pm, through Dec. 24. 29th Avenue Artworks, 3128 E. 29th Ave. (534-7959) RACHEL PALMER: A series of mixedmedia monoprints by local student artist Rachel Palmer. Dec. 20, 6 pm. Free. Boots Bakery & Lounge, 24 W. Main Ave. bootsbakery.com (509-703-7223) WEST CENTRAL FESTIVAL OF THE ARTS Arts showcase featuring a variety of Spokane artists including paintings, wood crafts, pottery, jewelry, photography, quilts and more. Through Dec. 20, dates and hours vary. Free. Salem Lutheran Church, 1428 W. Broadway Ave. salemlutheranspokane.com (3286260) CABIN FEVER Paintings, fine crafts and photography by local and Northwest artists. Jan. 2-31. Free. Gallery Northwest, 217 E. Sherman Ave. thegallerynorthwest.com (208-667-5700) MANZANAR: THE WARTIME PHOTOS OF ANSEL ADAMS Exhibition featuring 50 photographs of the Japanese-American internment camp in Manzanar, Calif. during WWII. Exhibit runs Jan. 4-March 29. Hosted walk-through Jan. 17 at 10:30 am. Gallery hours Mon-Sat 10 am-4 pm. Free admission. Jundt Art

Museum, 502 E. Boone Ave. gonzaga. edu/jundt (313-6611)

WORDS

FESTIVAL OF THE ARTS LITERARY NIGHT An evening of poetry readings, lead by Spokane’s Poet Laureate, Thom Caraway, as part of the West Central Festival of the Arts. Dec. 20, 7 pm. Free. Salem Lutheran Church, 1428 W. Broadway Ave. salemlutheranspokane.com (328-6280) AUTHOR SCOTT C. GLENNIE The Spokane author signs copies of his debut novel, “Kicking the Can.” Dec. 21, 12-2 pm. Free. Auntie’s Bookstore, 402 W. Main Ave. auntiesbooks.com (8380206)

ETC.

ARGENTINE TANGO LESSONS Lessons for beginning to advanced dancers. Thursdays, lessons from 7-8 pm, dancing from 8-9 pm. $5. Women’s Club, 1428 W. Ninth Ave. (534-4617) ARTS ANONYMOUS 12-step program for artists to explore, expand and receive support for their work in any media and at all skill levels. Meets Saturdays from 3-4:30 pm. Free. St. Luke’s Rehab Center, 711 S. Cowley. (280-0325) EAGLE WATCH CRUISE Eagle-watching cruises to view the 100s of bald eagles that stop at Lake CdA for their annual migration. Sat-Sun at 1 pm through Dec. 22; daily from Dec. 26-Jan. 1 at 1 pm. $23/adults, $21/adults 55+, $15/ kids 6-12, kids under 5 free. The Coeur d’Alene Resort, 115 S. 2nd Ave. cdacruises.com (208-664-7268) THE STORYTELLING COMPANY Annual dinner show featuring music by John Hastings, the release of a new book from Blue Creek Press and an update on the mythical city of Shoreline, Idaho. Dec. 22, 5 pm. $10, not including dinner or drinks. Di Luna’s Cafe, 207 Cedar St. dilunas.com (208-263-0846) ARGENTINE TANGO LESSONS No experience or partner necessary. Mondays from 7-9 pm. $5-$10. Spokane Tango, 2117 E. 37th Ave. spokanetango.com (688-4587) TED TALK DISCUSSION Weekly discussion group on TED talks. Meets Wednesdays at 5:30 pm. Free. Boots Bakery & Lounge, 24 W. Main Ave. chatham@labaratoryspokane.com (7037223) “GOT TALENT?” VARIETY SHOW Open mic talent show, held on the fourth Saturday of the month at 7 pm. Red Dragon Chinese, 1406 W. Third Ave. reddragondelivery.com (838-6688) NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION HELP The bookstore has invited local experts to provide guidance and information on topics that may be on people’s “resolution lists,” including advice on the Paleo Diet, volunteering in the community and finding more time to be with family. Dec. 28, 11 am. Free. Auntie’s Bookstore, 402 W. Main Ave. auntiesbooks. com (838-0206) T.W.I.N.E. Teen Writers of the Inland Empire meets on the first Thursday of the month (except holidays) to write and share their work. For grades 6+. First Thurs. of every month, 4 pm. Free. Spokane Valley Library, 12004 E. Main. teenwritersoftheinlandempire. blogspot.com (893-8400) n

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66 66 INLANDER INLANDER DECEMBER DECEMBER 19, 19, 2013 2013

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40. See 1-Across 42. Hanging loose 43. Connecticut town featured in a 1988 Julia Roberts movie 45. Admits 47. Fashion souvenir from Scotland 49. See 26-Across 50. Norse explorer Ericson 54. Setting for some wrestling 56. Golf’s Crenshaw or Hogan 57. He played Nordberg in the “Naked Gun” films 60. Air safety org. 63. NFL city’s isolated charged particles? 67. Rank 68. “The Barber of Seville” composer 69. A UPS driver may have one: Abbr. 70. Tolkien creature

71. See 1-Across DOWN 1. They’re picked up by treaters 2. Together, in music 3. Diplomat Annan 4. Movie in which Will Ferrell delivers the line “Santa’s coming! I know him! I know him!” 5. ____-Locka, Florida 6. Sports org. with Ducks and Penguins 7. Job rights agcy. 8. WWII blast makers 9. Devotees 10. Early smartphone 11. Three-time Masters winner Nick 12. Democrat-turned-Republicanturned-Democrat Spector 13. Southern Iraqi city

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ACROSS 1. With 40- and 71-Across, perform a selfless act in sports (and this puzzle’s theme) 8. Time of day when many soap operas air: Abbr. 11. “Marvy!” 14. Sax who invented the saxophone 15. Boxer in the U.S. senate 17. NFL city’s osteoporosis? 19. Tre + tre 20. Home movie maker 21. %: Abbr. 24. RBI producer, sometimes: Abbr. 25. Lady of Spain 26. With 49-Across, NFL city’s punk rock group? 30. Bottom line 32. Refueling opportunities 34. Lion, e.g. 39. ____ Ababa, Ethiopia

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16. Word with early or whirly 18. Michael Jackson hit whose video was directed by Martin Scorsese 21. Put forward 22. Does the job

31. Returning lover’s question 33. Jack of “Barney Miller” 35. Quark-binding particle THIS 30 31 36. ____ Crunch W A NSWE EEK’S 37. Entr’____ 34 35 36 37 38 38. Fight stoppers, for short PAGE RS ON 41 42 65 41. He preceded GHWB 44. “The Piano” director 46 46. Catch 49 48. “You ____!” (“No!”) 50. Kurt who broke the news on MTV that Kurt 56 Cobain had died 59 60 61 62 51. DVD button 52. “This ____ life!” 64 65 66 53. Axe 68 55. Green piece?: Abbr. 58. Spy 71 59. Thornton in the International Swimming Hall of Fame “ONE FOR THE TEAM” 60. Liver at the Louvre 23. Uruguayan uncle 61. Model ____ Nicole Smith 26. Email that’s sent out by the millions 62. “____ sure you’ve heard ...” 27. Neat 64. Japanese dramatic form 28. Former Ford models 65. Portland-to-Boise dir. 29. Coppertone letters 66. Believer’s suffix 25

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I Saw You

Cheers

Cheers

Valley Medical Building The valley medical building on the December 16th we locked eyes and smiled at each other, but work was in the way of me saying hi. You: blonde, FedEx driver, with a beautiful smile. Me: pruning shrubs out front, the one with glasses and beard. Maybe we can talk without work in our way. Email me ckarst14@gmail.com

tattered tights — that’s how hard I fell for you, Cat Man. If you think our mutual love of cats could grow to include each other, meet me and Mr. Whiskers across the street from the yellow house with cat beds all over the porch. I love the stories of missed connections that could have been amazing. The people who are bordering stalkers (it’s a fine line). Those people who pay it forward! and the people who have nothing better to do than make up a fake I saw you ad just to get your attention. If you have any amazing stories from the I SAW YOU section, send them to ChrisB@inlander.com because we are going to be doing a story about them. Thanks!

heart do flips. I love the life we are building together; even the not so good days, lets keep it rollin! I love you! Dottie Moo

the second I look at you or hear your voice the rest of the world goes quiet and sort of disappears. Do you remember when we went up to Rimrock and I told you that was my heaven? Well loving you has changed my mind about heaven, heaven is every moment I have spent in your arms, its every time I see you and my son playing together, every kiss, every touch, every seemingly mundane moment when you take my breath away and you don’t even realize it. Regardless of where we are or what we are doing I fall in love with you in all the small nameless moments. You are the glue that holds all the desperately broken pieces of my soul together and what’s more, from time to time you make me forget I was ever broken at all. I promise you there will be days that I fail you, days that I don’t let you know how much you mean to me and for those days I’m sorry but please know in your heart that our family is my everything. So for Christmas this year all I really want is for you to know in the deepest part of your soul that I love you in the truest way and I am utterly devoted to making sure each and every day for the rest of my life that you know how amazing you are and how much you mean to me. I look forward to building our life together, I love you my friend.

Twigs I saw you at Twigs in the Valley on a Saturday night. Our eyes met over the seats between the dining area and the bar. You were the girl with the nice saltpepper hair and easy smile. You had those delicious, brown doe eyes that just invited me in. You sported that warm, come-hither look that just melted me. Not only am I smart but I am funny, too. Interested? truthman2010@live. com Put a non-identifying email

TO CONNECT

address in your message, like Whitworth Wednesday, December 11th, I was driving around on “petals327@yahoo.com” — not campus at Whitworth, lost. I “j.smith@comcast.net.” randomly stopped, rolled my window down, and asked you for directions to a specific hall. You, young man with dark hair, helped me by giving me directions. I want to say thank you again! Not only for helping me, but with how nice you were. I figure you being in college, you might actually read this. Pizza girl says thank you.

Miss Matching Gorgeous Winco, really? It had to be there I guess. Well my soul exploded, and nearly escaped my body when I looked at you. You were dressed well and warm. Those hot stretchy pants with furry boots and a furry jacket, matching your furry hat. Thick black framed glasses. You are so beautiful. At the end, I looked for a ring on your hand but couldn’t remember what hand to look at, the one I did get a glance at had no ring. You had a 5 month old perhaps? I am the 6’ guy with the elderly lady. Don’t worry, we are not a thing. I had thick black glasses on as well and long hair. My facial hair sucked, given that I have been staying the night at her house lately. I do have my own place.

I Saw You

$

I Saw You

Cheers Cheap Shots A giant round of applause to Dave Daley at Daley’s Cheap Shots on Trent Ave. for hosting the best in live, local music! No matter the time of year, Dave hosts world class, local musicians for his patrons’ enjoyment. I’ve never heard better blues music than on Sunday nights at Daley’s Cheap Shots. Ever. Been to Chicago, Memphis, New Orleans. Dave lets these guys and gals do what they do, best. Dance, drink, and dine to the once best-keptsecret in the musical universe. If you can play, or not, come and see the Sunday show, or jump on in and jam. You’ll wonder where you’ve been before landing there. To you and your staff, Dave. “Way to go !!” Gary You are without a doubt my dream come true, you came sweeping into my life like a welcome breeze on a hot summer day and my life will never be the same. I love all that you are, your complications, your pains, your secrets, your longings, your dreams, your past, I love you completely; without exemptions. I always say you are my sunshine but in reality you more represent my moon in the fact that even in my darkest hour, you light up my world. I love being the one you come home too, the one who gets to fall asleep and wake up to you. Thank you for being so good to me baby, for holding me together when I want to fall apart. You are so strong and brave to be with someone who has as many health problems as I do. Your love is steady and strong and I am constantly in awe of you, you take my breath away and make my

Merry Christmas Thank you and a very Merry Christmas to the kind lady behind me in line at Olde World Christmas this past Monday. I admired the adorable garden tool ornament that you were purchasing. I inquired which bin you found it in and went over to hunt for it while my husband stood in line to pay. I returned to the counter to pay, after failing to locate one, and you generously offered to let me purchase yours! That was very kind and totally made my day! Thank you and I will think of you each Christmas as I place it on our tree. Thank You! On my way home, after having a horrible day, I stopped at the Exxon on Division and 2nd to get a Red Bull for finals week and gas. Not only was my card declined, but I couldn’t find my other card. You so nicely paid for me without hesitation. Thank you so much, you have no idea how much it meant. I wish I could return the good deed! Indian Trail Yokes Employees I was in a conversation with another fellow employee when you tossed a tangerine at him and then gave one to me as well. I was so shocked I couldn’t even get the words “thank you” to come out of my mouth as you were walking away! So, thank you! To the nice gentleman that works in... produce? Christmas Cheer Our first Christmas as a married couple and it feels better than I ever could have imagined. I love every moment spent with you. No matter how stressed, negative or down things may get I know I’m a blessed man as long as I have you in my life. Merry Christmas and a happy new year to the love of my life. Many more years of wedded bliss to come! jj

Jeers Low Life Scumbag Jeers to the low life scumbag that stole our niece’s last piece of cake. I hope you feel good stealing cake from a 16 year old with brain cancer. May the cake lodge in your throat until you die you worthless bastard !!! To the thirty-something couple, who, while waiting in line to see Santa with their young daughter at River Park Square, actually produced a small child’s toilet from under their stroller, proceeded to pull their daughter’s pants down right there in line and let her use

I Love You Loving you is an orgasm of the soul, a truth I have searched for with all I was making my daily my heart. I have this neighborhood round to feed, glorious moment pet and socialize the homeless every day when I (and otherwise neglected by my realize how much incompetent neighbors) cats and we mean to each kittens, and lo and behold, there other and it takes you were. You bent down to pet Submit your Cheers at my breath away. Mr. Whiskers, the orange tabby inlander.com /sweet I believe that that lives across the street, and when two people my heart skipped a beat. Was that are meant to be and be entered to win: a tuft of cat fur on your sleeve? together, the rest of Did I really see you pull a bag of the world just kinda cat treats from your pocket and Courtesy of disappears for them, I offer Mr. Whiskers a handful? In feel that when I am with the moment I was so mesmerized you. All day long I have I didn’t even notice the hungry, a million things running mewing kittens climbing up my Winners drawn bi-weekly at random. through my mind and the Must be 18 or older to enter. legs, scratching through my clawworld is noisy and loud but “I Saw You” is for adults 18 or older. The Inlander reserves the right to edit or reject any advertisement at any time at its sole discretion and assumes no responsibility for the content.

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Jeers

Jeers

the toilet in front of everyone. Are you seriously kidding me? Do you have any class or consideration for others at all? Do you want everyone in the world seeing your daughter’s bare ass and watch her do her business? Where is the pride? It isn’t like one of you couldn’t have taken her to the bathroom while the other parent remained in line, and we would have kindly held your place for you if you had only asked. If this is some new kind of toilet training philosophy, please wake up and just stay home with her until she is trained, as nobody wants to see your daughter doing her business, no matter how cute YOU perceive that she is!

They are NOT yours. Jesus has taught me forgiveness this year, so I forgive you.. But ..SHAME on YOU. Please return. Merry Christmas .”

Car Accident “Holiday Jeers to you, Nicole, or Brittany, or whatever alias you are using to circumvent your legal responsibility to possess a driver’s license and provide proof of automobile insurance. Jeers to you for broadsiding our van in Coeur d’Alene, and leaving us stuck with the repair bill, and most importantly; jeers to you and all the other ass clowns who refuse to abide by the laws and leave the rest of us to pay for it. May you suckle from the teat of a syphilitic sow." Shame On You! “I want to Thank whoever got into my garage and STOLE my Christmas Decorations for the inside of my home. Plus looking thru other boxes. What would make you want them???

Jeers

Financial Priorities If you have the financial means to purchase non essentials items (i.e. cigarettes, lottery tickets…) then complain about how broke you are; how you can’t purchase holiday gifts for your family; turn around having the audacity to brag about your lottery winnings. Please, don’t take this the wrong way, we all have our down times but we must keep in mind “blessings” that are given to us by God, have the “knowledge” to understand how to use these “ blessings” and the “wisdom” to thank the Lord for what He has given. Can I get an Amen, Hallelujah!!! Children and Fast Food Jeers to all the cheeseburger heads that think fast food is part of a balanced meal for their kids. There is no reason to have a child under the age of 10 that is obese. At this point in their life parents can dictate what and when they eat. So shame on all you parents with overweight kids taking them to fast food 5 night a week, you aren’t even giving them a chance to make a change. We as Americans shouldn’t need the government to tell us, but based on the last 20 years I honestly am starting to wonder if parents should be told what to feed their

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Father of Two I saw the red flags right away, but my curiosity got the best of me. You truly are what I’ve read about. All of the tokens of your travels. They don’t represent who you are. They are merely a mirror of the person you assume to be, a mask. Manipulating people is easy, contrary to popular stereotypical belief it isn’t a necessity, nor is it a compulsion. It’s fun, to hold the power to change someones life, puppet their every action, shape there every thought with a few words, a god complex couldn’t ask for more, right? You choose to help “her” rather than destroy “her”. Not because you’re a nice guy, but simply because it’s more challenging; the endeavor will hold your attention for longer. After all people by nature are self destructive. Of course, that isn’t to say you won’t enjoy stripping away there morals. You move on without making a single wave. Yes I know you’re a sociopath. I saw you. I got it. You didn’t go unnoticed. Regicide Rarely does snapping off at, result in snapping out of… If there is one thing I have learned from real-time strategy games: Rebuild quickly and fortify otherwise you will not survive the next attack. As such if you can’t gather resources fast enough, there is really nopoint in showing up.

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DECEMBER 19, 2013 INLANDER 69

F

Ice Man

Why Dan Martin is content traveling in circles BY JORDY BYRD

D

an Martin travels in continuous circles. Five times a day, five days a week, for the past 25 years, Martin has orchestrated a mechanical waltz — a one-man performance set to the dull roar and lumbering hydraulics of a 6,000-pound hulk of wheels and metal. The 46-year-old auto and diesel mechanic by trade drives a Zamboni at Eagles Ice Arena in North Spokane, patching the rutted grooves and cracks of ice left behind by hockey teams and figure skaters. He drives atop a bucket seat, behind what looks like a dumpster on wheels. He turns left — always left — in slow, methodical loops at five miles per hour. While the Zamboni beguiles hockey fans and pop culture alike — its likeness is trademarked and featured in McDonald’s happy meals, Monopoly pieces, on bumper stickers and in the beloved comic strip Peanuts — Martin sheepishly admits he drives in circles. He does not “dance” or “orchestrate.” “There is a lot of allure around Zambonis,” he says. “Everyone wants to drive one. I don’t really understand. ... I guess I’ve just been doing it for so long. I don’t see what the big hoopla is about.”

M

artin didn’t start out behind the wheel. He was hired by Eagles Ice Arena as a “parking lot picker upper” in high school. The owners taught him to drive the Zamboni after he got his

70 INLANDER DECEMBER 19, 2013

driver’s license. “It was kind of exciting,” he says. “My other friends were flipping burgers, and here I was driving the Zamboni.” He worked nights and weekends and learned to manipulate the $100,000 vehicle that instead of a clutch or gas pedal featured a 78-inch blade. He learned to make ice. The Zamboni drags an adjustable blade that removes approximately 1/16th of an inch — up to 2,500 pounds — off the ice. Parallel to the blade is a horizontal corkscrew that gathers the ice shavings to the center of the machine; a vertical corkscrew propels the shavings into a tank. Jets of water then clean the ice, removing debris from the grooves into a vacuum hose. The water is filtered by a conditioning unit before being heated and delivered back onto the ice through a series of pipes. The trick is to shave off just enough ice and lay down just enough water to create a glass-like surface for skaters. Martin equates the Zamboni to an overgrown riding lawnmower. “You can’t see directly in front of you while driving, so it’s all done by feel and sound,” he says. “You have to hear how much snow is going into the tank. You have to feel how much you’re taking off. ... We have a saying: ‘Anyone can drive a Zamboni, but not everyone can make ice.’”

Left turn ahead.

STEPHEN SCHLANGE PHOTO

rank Zamboni was the first to successfully make ice. The Pocatello, Idaho, native opened the 20,000-square foot Paramount Iceland skating rink in 1940 in Paramount, Calif.. An electrician by trade, he patented an ice rink floor system, then set his sights on an ice-resurfacing machine. Shaving ice without a huge yet sophisticated machine was laborious. Before the Zamboni, crews scraped off layers of ice with a tractor, shoveled the shavings, sprayed the surface with hot water, and waited for it to refreeze. The process took more than an hour and cost entrepreneurs like Zamboni money. In 1949, he patented the Model A Zamboni ice-resurfacing machine — a hodgepodge of aircraft, oil derrick and Jeep engine parts. Current Zambonis are similar to the Model A. Today, the machine is a mainstay at the Winter Olympics, figure skating competitions, National Hockey League games and mom-and-pop ice skating rinks alike. The familyrun company has a handful of competitors — although the word Zamboni has become synonymous with the machine — and has delivered more than 9,000 Zambonis worldwide.

M

artin travels in continuous circles. When not on the ice, he races a 1979 Ford Mustang at the Stateline Speedway. Race announcers have nicknamed him “Ice Man.” “I always joke that I go around in circles for a living, and I go around in circles for fun,” he says. Martin speaks of the four Zamboni drivers at Eagles Ice Arena, of the three machines the rink deploys, and the 15 minutes it takes to clear the ice. He does not understand why patrons are memorized by the whir of a machine and the somehow beautiful, hypnotic act of polishing a tattered sheet of ice. He does not think of anything while driving. Certainly nothing of art or the allure of his magical machine. “I just go out and do it,” he says. “I actually don’t even like to look out and see how many people are watching me. I keep my head down and just go… ” n

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Inlander 12/19/2013