Inlander 10/28/2021

OCTOBER 28-NOVEMBER 3, 2021 | PRINT ISN’T DEAD, EGON

REALTORS’ ELECTION POWER 8

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IT’S SCARY GOOD!

VOL. 29, NO. 3 | COVER ILLUSTRATION: DERRICK KING

COMMENT NEWS COVER STORY CULTURE

5 8 14 18

FOOD FILM MUSIC EVENTS

22 26 28 30

I SAW YOU GREEN ZONE ADVICE GODDESS BULLETIN BOARD

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EDITOR’S NOTE

P

eople in my neighborhood are really into HALLOWEEN. I mean, really into Halloween.

Starting in mid-September, ornate outdoor shrines to all things creepy and crawly start appearing in yards, on porches, in trees, even on rooftops.

What some folks do with Christmas lights, these people do with Halloween decorations, and it makes every dog walk a treat. Anyone who loves Halloween will be excited to read our cover story. For the second straight year, we’re publishing a scary bit of original fiction from an Inland Northwest author, and this time it’s from a former Inlander intern! Lauren Gilmore’s dystopian story “Milking It” has ghosts, guns, women standing up to an evil patriarchy, and a Jeff Bezos-type character — scary!

Also this week, we meet a fright-focused Instagram artist (page 18), delve into realtors’ influence in our local elections (page 8), and meet a seriously skilled songwriter in Cory Branan (page 28), visiting Spokane Friday.

— DAN NAILEN, editor

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Now on Inlander.com: National and international stories from the New York Times to go with the fresh, local news we deliver every day

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4 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

COMMENT STAFF DIRECTORY PHONE: 509-325-0634 Ted S. McGregor Jr. (tedm@inlander.com) PUBLISHER

WHAT IS THE BEST AND/OR WORST HALLOWEEN CANDY?

J. Jeremy McGregor (x224)

DARLENE R ARNOLD: The worst Halloween candy is the bottom-ofgrandma’s-purse hard candies, like the strawberries or mints. Only thing more disappointing than that was getting a gospel tract rubber banded to Smarties or raisins.

GENERAL MANAGER

EDITORIAL Dan Nailen (x239) EDITOR

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Derek Harrison (x248) CREATIVE DIRECTOR

L.A. WOLD: Controversial statement: I loved the black-and-orangewrapped peanut butter taffy. I don’t pass those out though. Full-size candy giver here.

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Samantha Wohlfeil (x234) BREAKING NEWS EDITOR Daniel Walters (x263) SENIOR INVESTIGATIVE REPORTER Seth Sommerfeld (x250) MUSIC EDITOR

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Every week, we ask our followers on social media to share their thoughts.

IAN NORDSTROM: As a kid with a peanut allergy, I learned how to trade my Butterfingers for Milky Ways and my 100 Grands for Skittles.

I soon realized that different kids valued different candies differently, and this secondary market could be optimized to my advantage. Looking back on it now, it seems like no coincidence that I became an economist with a chocolate addiction.

CARLY HANEY: I LOVE CANDY CORN, THERE I SAID IT. PIER SANNA: Anything with nuts is out, when offered a choice (chocolate v. neon anything); the kids who came to my door picked neon leaving us with the chocolate.

CARLIE HARDING LEE: Best: Reese’s Cups (because chocolate + pb is the ultimate combo). Worst: Sweet Tarts (because they taste like tart chalk).

STEVE KELLY: Only one candy that is both the best and the worst, depending on your tastes: CANDY CORN!

Tom Stover (x265) PRODUCTION MANAGER

ANGELA LALONDE: Twix is one of the best. Last candy eaten were the Dum Dum lollipops.

Ali Blackwood (x228) CREATIVE LEAD & MARKETING MANAGER

ADELA SUSSMAN: The worst, imo, is candy corn.

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CHARLOTTE ROGERS THACKER: Candy Corn [worst]. Snickers and Reeses you can enjoy the whole year. Candy Corn is fresh only for Halloween.

ALEX COX: The best candy is no candy, it’s full of sugar and highfructose corn syrup. Give the little monsters low sodium beef jerky and organic trail mix instead. n

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Swap Out The Season...

More than just an injured shoulder.

Where I Am in Space Learning a new diagnosis opens a new perspective on life, leading to strength, kindness and grace

BY TARA ROBERTS

S

ometimes I want to forget I have a body. I used to try. I’d sink into a project or idea, my mind buzzing, my sense of the physical world dissolving into hours of working, writing, thinking, talking. I’d consider my body an exploitable shell, a useful enough host, that made its demands but was not me.

But the body has a way of making itself known.

Last spring, I got lost in thought while I was walking my dog and tripped on an uneven chunk of sidewalk. I landed on my arm, screwing up my shoulder. It’s a familiar injury, starting with a fall when I was a college senior that left the campus doctor so bewildered she dragged in all of her colleagues to double-check her assessment.

“This is the kind of injury that happens to football players,” she said. “Not people who trip and fall.”

6 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

The orthopedic surgeon who examined my shoulder last spring raised an eyebrow when I recounted that conversation and others. The list of sprains and strains and separations, hard falls and mystery pains, that time I herniated a disk in my neck by sneezing really hard.

He asked me to lift my arms, to rotate my shoulders, to place my palms flat on the floor. He asked if I was double-jointed. (Sure.) If anyone had ever pointed out that I was, in fact, more — loose-jointed, lax-jointed, floppy-jointed. (No.) “You have no idea what a normal body feels like,” he said, and scribbled a name on a piece of paper.

A few more rounds of doctors and tests confirmed his prediction: I have hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, a somewhat rare genetic disorder that affects the way my body makes collagen, causing unstable joints, chronic pain and often a herd of other issues.

I

’ve had it my whole life. Upon reflection, I realized I’ve had symptoms since I was a preteen, though they’ve grown distinctly, disruptively worse in my 30s.

But the name is new, as are all the things that come with having that name attached to my body.

It’s like having the key to a code I didn’t know I was misreading. Of course I hurt myself! Of course those injuries hang on for years! Even small things, like my tendency to run into walls and my extreme fear of heights, make new sense — unstable joints affect proprioception, or the body’s sense of where it is in space.

It’s reframing how I think and talk about myself. I’ve called myself clumsy, klutzy, awkward, goofy, fragile, wimpy, weak. I’ve berated myself for inabilities I thought I could overcome if I just tried hard enough. Pushed myself through pain because I was ashamed to admit it existed.

Tried to convince myself my body didn’t matter.

So many things in this world try to tell us that different bodies, difficult bodies, vulnerable bodies don’t matter.

The past 19 months have ground that fact in even harder.

When a young nurse, my age, died of COVID in my community, commenters asked whether she had underlying conditions. I still think about those comments.

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I’ve berated myself for inabilities I thought I could overcome if I just tried hard enough.

I’m not the only person whose body demands more than our culture wants to allow it — and especially not the only woman.

Hypermobile EDS affects about three times more women than men. Similar proportions exist in other genetic and autoimmune disorders.

I’ve been shepherded through this experience by women who were also diagnosed with life-altering conditions in their 20s and 30s: MS, polycystic ovarian syndrome, lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, bipolar disorder, ADHD and, like me, EDS. They weren’t hard to find, because they were already all around me.

The truth, as disability justice scholar Rosemarie GarlandThompson writes, is that my experience isn’t strange at all: “The fact is, most of us will move in and out of disability in our lifetimes, whether we do so through illness, an injury or merely the process of aging.”

I

don’t know yet whether I want to wear my diagnosis loudly or quietly, whether I want to be an advocate or activist, whether I’ll keep writing about this experience or leave it at this. I still have a lot to figure out about who and what and where I am in this new space.

But I know I’d like to forget I have a body sometimes.

Not forget that my body needs care, but care for it so well that I don’t try to hide it, minimize it, belittle it. I want to strengthen it where I can, respect its limits, talk about it with kindness, treat it with grace.

I want to accept labels and diagnoses when they’re helpful, and brush them off when they’re not. I want to stop comparing what a “normal” body feels like and lean into feeling what I feel.

I want to forget I have a body because I get so good at remembering my body is me. n

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Tara Roberts is a writer and college journalism adviser who lives in Moscow with her husband, sons and poodle. Her work has appeared in Moss, Hippocampus and a variety of regional publications. Follow her on Twitter @tarabethidaho.

OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 7

HOUSING

REALTORS’ WORLD

The secrets to wooing the Spokane Association of Realtors

FROM LEFT: Spokane Association of Realtors’ Tom Clark, Eric Johnson and Darin Watkins. YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

BY DANIEL WALTERS

T

he Spokane Association of Realtors, in all likelihood, made Nadine Woodward the mayor of Spokane.

It’s difficult to say, of course, what would have happened if the Realtors association hadn’t summoned a quarter-million dollars in independent expenditures to support the former newscaster two years ago. But even if the Realtors’ ads only convinced 500 voters out of more than 68,000 to vote for Woodward, that would have been enough to swing the election.

And this year, they’ve doubled down, targeting a combined $247,000 in state and national Realtor PAC independent expenditures to support two conservative Spokane City Council candidates, Jonathan Bingle and Michael Lish.

That money — which far outstrips what either candidate has in their own campaign coffers — paid for online ads, phone calls, mailers, text messages, even door-todoor canvassers.

The Realtors argue that their endorsements of candidates aren’t partisan — that they’re laser focused on the issue of who’s the best on housing policy at a time when a housing shortage has sent rents and home prices skyrocketing. They’re calling for deregulation to allow denser development in both the cities and the outskirts.

“I guess there came some point when we finally just said, ‘If it’s not us, who is going to argue for housing?’” says Darin Watkins, the Spokane Association of Realtors director of government affairs. “We just need housing.

It’s not a red, it’s not a blue or green or orange issue — it’s a need.”

Critics — including candidates like City Council candidate Zack Zappone — have decried the Realtors’ influence on the race as something more pernicious.

8 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

“I think voters need to be asking themselves, why have the [Realtors] invested so much money on this race?” Zappone says. “What do they expect in return?”

Instead of focusing on candidates with housing policy expertise they may clash with, the Realtors have been just as likely to champion comparative blank slates who are receptive to their input.

“It’s not because we want to control the candidates,” Spokane Association of Realtors President Eric Johnson says, “as much as, ‘Will you just listen to us?’”

HOW TO WIN THE REALTORS’ FAVOR

Eight or nine years ago, the National Association of Realtors decided to become a political force. They quickly recognized where they could wield the most power.

“They could put a bazillion dollars in the national level and have very little effect, or put substantially less dollars into local [races] and have a lot more effect on housing issues,” says Tom Clark, chair of the Government Affairs Committee for the Spokane Realtors.

But to decide where to spend all that money, the National Association of Realtors relies on local associations in places like Spokane for guidance. Think of the local Realtors associations like ground troops who can call in airstrikes from state and national PACs. Watkins petitions the state and national organizations to support ideal candidates who may find themselves in tight races. The national association even pays for their own polling to test the waters.

“They will come back and say we think your candidate has this kind of a chance,” Watkins says.

But first, the Spokane Realtors had to judge whether each candidate was worthy of their support. It starts with giving the candidates a questionnaire, then an interview.

All the council candidates who made it through the primary agreed with the Realtors that we need to change zoning to allow for denser development on smaller lot sizes. But Bingle and Lish gained extra points by being the only candidates in their races, according to the Realtors, to support expanding the borders in the county where dense housing can be built.

Bingle’s opponent, Naghmana Sherazi, meanwhile, lost points in the Realtors’ eyes by pushing for more tenantprotection regulations.

“I have four degrees, and I’m struggling hard to make ends meet,” Sherazi says, stressing why she believes capping rents are necessary. “There are tons of people like me.”

Johnson says that their direct candidate donations in the past decade have covered the political spectrum, ranging from Democrats like Washington state Rep. Marcus Riccelli to Republicans as far right as former state Rep. Matt Shea. They even endorsed Councilwoman Betsy Wilkerson over her since-disqualified challenger Tyler LeMasters — despite the fact that the more conservative LeMasters was a Realtor.

“We’re bipartisan,” Johnson says of the state association. “We’re the biggest PAC in the state, and our record’s 50/50.”

But the Realtors fire their heavy artillery in a much more lopsided direction: This past decade in Washington state, the vast majority of the top 20 recipients of independent expenditures from state or national Realtor PACs have been directed at conservative-leaning candidates. The handful of Democrats — like Seattle Mayoral Candidate Bruce Harrell and state Sen. Mark Mullet — were in races facing opponents further to their left. ...continued on page 10

OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 9

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NEWS | HOUSING “REALTORS’ WORLD,” CONTINUED...

All this, however, has risked backlash from their own politically diverse membership.

“Many, many individual Realtors have reached out to say they’re not happy with this,” Zappone says. “They’re not getting a say.”

HOW TO LOSE THE REALTORS’ FAVOR

Two years after losing the mayoral election, former candidate Ben Stuckart thought he’d nailed that interview two years ago. He still doesn’t quite understand how he lost out on the Realtors’ endorsement to Woodward. His entire campaign was launched on the premise of building more housing in the city.

Watkins says he remembers Stuckart coming into his Realtors endorsement interview brimming with confidence and presenting a detailed plan. It’s just that the Realtors thought it was a bad one, Watkins says, scoffing in particular at Stuckart’s plan to build more affordable housing in the city’s dense “centers and corridors” zones on arterials and neighborhood hubs.

“Our Realtors looked at the centers and corridors and said, ‘You realize that’s the most expensive housing in the city?’” Watkins says.

But Nadine Woodward? Watkins says she came in and said she didn’t have all the answers, but knew who did: The people who were interviewing her. And she promised when she was mayor they would be a part of the group coming up with solutions. The Realtors, who were also displeased with Stuckart’s receptiveness to their input as council president, went with Woodward.

Zappone’s experience played out in a similar fashion. He disagreed with the Realtors on a number of issues, including concentrating development on centers and corridors.

“There wasn’t a lot of give,” Clark says. “I think the committee — at least I sure did — felt Lish was more malleable. More willing to say, ‘I don’t know everything there is to know about this subject… Tell me what you think.’”

But Zappone says it felt like when he walked into the interview the committee had already decided who to support. There was no in-depth conversation and few, if any, clarifications about the answers on his questionnaire, he says: just nice to meet you, here’s a souvenir coffee mug, see you later.

“As much as the Zappone thinks the Realtors are against him,” Clark says, “The truth is we’re not against him, we’re in favor of his opponent.”

They’ve dumped over $144,000 into supporting Lish, Clark points out, but they haven’t spent anything on negative advertising.

Contrast that with the Spokane Good Government Alliance, which last week sent out a flyer attacking “Radical Zack Zappone.” It cites a statement from Zappone’s Realtors candidate questionnaire where he supported the city moving toward “prohibition of natural gas,” a position Zappone has since disavowed.

While Watkins told the Inlander that the Realtors “have a proprietary agreement with the candidates not to reveal their answers,” the Good Government Alliance says “several local mem-

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bers of the Spokane Association of Realtors shared Mr. Zappone’s questionnaire with us.”

Watkins says he’d shared Zappone’s answer on natural gas with Avista, but no one else. He also says, however, that there may be a reason, beyond polling, that the National Association of Realtors is spending more money to elect his opponent than, say, to elect Bingle.

“Mr. Zappone put out some nasty anti-Realtor messaging,” Watkins says. “If somebody has come out as anti-Realtor, it does influence the national committee.”

“We all know the Realtors spend thousands to try to choose our lawmakers. And liberals, conservatives, and folks in the middle are tired of it,” Zappone wrote in a press release in July.

“Voters’ voices are being diluted by the Realtors’ money.”

That’s one downside of all of the mailers and doorbelling from the Realtors, Lish says — you get accused of being a boughtand-paid-for sellout.

“We both aligned and that’s it,” Lish says. “Not selling my soul to anybody.”

Both Bingle and Lish note that their opponents sought the Realtors endorsement, too.

“If Naghmana had received their endorsement, would she be a puppet for the Realtors?” Bingle says. “No. She’s a principled woman. And I say the same thing about myself. I’m a principled man.”

That means leaders that the Realtors spend a fortune to elect can just as easily disappoint them.

Asked about Mayor Woodward’s performance so far, the leaders from the Spokane Association of Realtors offer a mix of rationalizations and frustrations, but few hosannas. The city’s severely understaffed. It still hasn’t found a planning director.

Woodward wants to spend money reserved for affordable housing on a homeless shelter instead.

“The mayor’s had a lot of challenges, right?” Johnson says.

“And this is her first term. And COVID’s been a nightmare.” n

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OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 11

NEWS | ENVIRONMENT

Sustainability in Spokane

the ballot. The strategy is gone in the final version.

“It was clear the Spokane community didn’t support that,” Odegard says.

Instead, the city is asked to incentivize electrification and renewable energy for all new residential and commercial construction. Another ask could be that the city require builders to include electric hookups for all appliances in new construction, even if they initially choose to use natural gas appliances.

“Additional ordinances and laws would need to be adopted to make these official,” Odegard points out.

Spokane City Council approves sustainability plan meant to guide urgent climate action

BY SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL

F

rom encouraging the adoption of electric cars to incentivizing energy efficiency in new construction, Spokane’s newly approved Sustainability Action Plan is intended to guide the community as it helps address the global issue of climate change.

Modeled on plans passed in other cities such as Flagstaff, Arizona, Spokane’s update of its 2009 sustainability plan was approved by a 6-1 vote Monday, Oct. 25, by the Spokane City Council. Council Member Michael Cathcart was the sole member voting against the plan, saying he was concerned it did not spell out the financial impacts of its proposed policies.

The more than 80-page plan received significant public feedback, taking the council’s Sustainability Action Subcommittee more than two years to complete.

It includes not just climate-specific goals, but strategies that can make the entire region more resilient to economic pressures and disasters.

“You cannot dissect climate or sustainability or the economy or health, you can’t take any of those aspects out and only address them in a vacuum,” says Kara Odegard, Spokane City Council manager of sustainability initiatives. “We have to look at the whole health of our community.”

If other cities are a guidepost, the sustainability plan can help Spokane prioritize science-based decision-making when it comes to everything from updating the building code to investing in new gardening equipment. But the plan doesn’t change policy just by being passed. The city still has to act on each item individually.

Some critics worry that other cities who’ve done this type of planning have ultimately banned things like natural gas connections in new construction (Spokane’s plan doesn’t call for that). One resident speaking against the measure Monday said he feared a move like that could make the region more vulnerable during extreme winter and summer weather, when power lines are more likely to go down or the grid is more likely to get overloaded with demand.

But proponents, who made up the majority of public feedback Monday, thanked those who’d spent thousands of hours putting together a game plan to tackle the climate emergency. Like other

12 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

cities, Spokane’s work was driven by urgent international climate reports about impacts communities are already facing. Things will get worse if the status quo remains.

“We’re at this crossroads where we need to make a decision on our energy future,” Odegard says. “What climate policies are we really willing to adopt today to ensure we have a liveable, sustainable future for people who are young today?”

Electric vehicle infrastructure is key.

SPOKANE’S PLAN

SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL PHOTO

Overall, the plan has three goals: reduce greenhouse gas emissions by 95 percent (from 2016 levels) by 2050, build a community and economy that are resilient to climate change, and prioritize people who are most at risk of health and financial impacts.

In 2018, Spokane adopted a goal of 100 percent renewable electricity by 2030. That goal became a requirement (with a deadline of 2045) when Washington lawmakers passed the Clean Energy Transformation Act the next year.

Cities like Spokane must work with utilities, private citizens and businesses to make significant changes if those requirements are to be met.

The sustainability plan includes dozens of specific strategies to meet reduction requirements and ensure the community has safeguards in place, such as making sure new construction keeps efficiency and renewable energy in mind, and increasing community health through access to housing and food.

An earlier draft would have asked the city to consider banning natural gas connections in new construction. But that received pushback, including the filing of a proposition that ultimately got booted from

FLAGSTAFF SUCCESS

Spokane is not the only city working on a sustainability plan. In fact, it’s part of the Urban Sustainability Directors Network, where city leaders can learn from one another’s work and avoid reinventing the wheel, explains Jenny Niemann, the climate program manager for Flagstaff.

“You can look up who’s done a heat pump training,” Niemann says. “Or it can be, ‘Can I see your building code for electric vehicles?’”

Spokane reached out to Flagstaff to learn about their plan, which passed in 2018 just a month after a United Nations report made it clear that only drastic changes will prevent the worst impacts of changes already underway.

At the request of the community, Flagstaff updated its plan with more stringent carbon neutral guidelines.

Flagstaff’s parks staff is switching to electric vehicles and testing electric landscaping tools, Niemann says. Other staff are helping the community understand the economic benefits of electrification.

Mostly, the plan helped set a baseline for other conversations, Niemann says. For example, when the city updated its building codes, the climate plan provided the background for why going above and beyond was necessary, she says. Flagstaff requires infrastructure for electric vehicle charging and solar panels in all new construction now.

“When we started the conversation about the building code, everyone knew we’d passed this climate plan, right?” Niemann says. “That was very helpful because we didn’t have to argue about whether or not we should address the climate.”

That’s not to say developers have been thrilled. There’s been pushback on some strategies, and unlike in Washington, Flagstaff isn’t allowed to eliminate natural gas under Arizona law, Niemann says. But the plan can help the community think long term and build for a more resilient future, she says.

“This plan has been a really good framework, and it looks like the big three objectives Spokane is working on can be similarly helpful to motivate people,” Niemann says. “This isn’t about painful choices, it’s about exciting choices we get to make.” n samanthaw@inlander.com

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OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 13

MILKING IT An original story of a frightening future

BY LAUREN GILMORE

14 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

W

hen I left my hometown, I took a jar of dirt with me. It wasn’t large. Just a little glass container with rubber around the lid and enough soil to sink two, maybe three fingers into before hitting the bottom. I wasn’t superstitious and I wasn’t going to do it at all until I went to Meg’s house for dinner the night before my train left.

Like always, I was dead sober and she was on her third glass of Merlot. Her lipstick—a light mauve only a shade or two off from her foundation—left a faint spongy pattern around the rim of her glass.

“Wait, Vee—” She brought both palms up to either side of my cheeks and pressed in. “I can’t believe I didn’t think of this. You’re leaving single.”

“I guess so, yeah.” Meg was insensitive on her best days, but I really couldn’t reconcile her excitement over this with the truth of it. Single meant one thing: glitzy cocktail dresses, drunken mistakes, a bubble of extended girlhood. Maybe that’s why the word widow was invented. Something had to close the gap between that and what had happened to me: my husband of six years in a body bag in our driveway, the ambulance going slow around the corner, its windshield wipers barely keeping up with the rain.

Hours after it was over I noticed his reading glasses were still set open on the kitchen table like a metal bug with two round eyes and no wings.

“I can’t believe I didn’t think of this. Come on. Come with me.”

Meg stood up too fast, I could tell. She wavered for a second, tugging her white tunic down. So many women here only wore dark colors: black, sometimes navy. I did. It was a way to protect against leaks without having to spring for those extra thick pads designed to soak up loose lactation. Meg did neither. She went braless under white cotton and if puddles formed under her shirt she barely noticed. A part of me always wondered if one day she’d drink so much the leaks would be purple and then everyone would know how she spent her evenings. Not that there was really a law against it. We were all pretty sure that they had a filtration system that took out any alcohol or trans fat or GMOs or whatever, but it still felt wrong so most women didn’t drink.

Once she’d collected herself, she grabbed my wrist and guided me out to the garage. Most couples had theirs set up like this: fridge against one wall, a kind of rocking chair in the corner — some holdover from back when nursing rooms meant you had a baby to soothe — and then the sink and the medicine cabinet.

One of Meg’s pumps was on the dish drain in pieces.

She flung the fridge open, revealing the neat rows of labeled bottles. Each had a printed label with her name and social security number and then a hand-written blank for the date and time.

Before they got loaded into the car her husband would initial them with a black Sharpie.

“Why are you showing me this?” It didn’t make sense, but anytime I looked at another woman’s milk it made me feel like I needed to pump. Brought up the violent fullness, that top-heavy sensation we’d all gotten used to by the time we were eighteen.

“What does this look like, Vee?” “It’s your fridge. Hey, if this is going to be one of your lectures about oppression and...”

“No, not a lecture.” She slammed the fridge door shut. She stumbled over the rocking chair, scooted far to one side and patted the space next to her. “Come here. Did you ever hear about the curse? The curse surrounding this town?”

I fell into the chair next to her. We tipped back together.

There wasn’t really enough space for both of us. Our legs pressed together: mine covered in the dark denim of jeans, hers bare, her loose skirt riding up to her waist. “What curse, Meg?” “Everyone knows. When you leave this town, you have to take a jar of dirt otherwise you’ll be forced to return.”

“Okay, yeah, maybe I’ve heard that. But —” I brought one hand instinctively to my chest, checking for dampness. “What does that have to do with your milk?”

“If you get on a train tomorrow morning with a jar of dirt and play the grieving widow, you can keep it. No questions asked.

They won’t search it. Especially if you start crying.”

“Okay —” “And then, you can hide anything you want in there. Say...”

She jumped out of the chair, leaving me alone like the heavier kid on a teeter totter. She turned to her medicine cabinet and pulled down one of her orange bottles. “Say a mandatory lactation pill or two...”

“Meg, that’s crazy.”

“Is it?” She twisted the top off of the pill bottle and dumped them out into her hand. “Or is it crazy not to? Think about it, Vee. Henry’s gone. Rest in peace, obviously.” She could tell I was about to interrupt her because she started talking faster. “But wouldn’t he want you to be free? He won’t be there to be punished for signing off on empty bottles. It will be at least a year before they find you a replacement in that new place and in the meantime, you send them something else.”

“Something else?”

“I don’t know, Vee, send them chalk in water or something.

They can’t really be checking every single one, and then you’ll have a year.” She planted her hands on either side of the rocking chair, leaning me over me so I dipped back until I was almost parallel with the poured cement ground. “A whole year. Can you even remember what it was like?”

“I mean —” I tore my eyes away from Meg to the sink and the disassembled pump.

“Just play the widow. You know, milk it a little.”

“That’s not funny, Meg.” She leaned off the chair with a remarkable gentleness, bringing me back upright and we were alone and still in that garage for maybe ten seconds before the door groaned open and her husband’s headlights spilled across us.

“Did you ever hear about the curse? The curse surrounding this town?”

*** After a death, the woman always left and got a new house in a new place. I’d never heard anyone question it except Meg, who loved to point out that when a woman died the man kept the house, waited there for a new wife to come rolling in on a perfume cloud from another town. Another way we’re expected to be more fragile, Meg would say. They assume the grief will be too much for us. So the process never differed and when the police explained it to me after Henry’s body had been taken away I was almost grateful for it. I knew exactly what to expect. There would be a few days, and then, when it was time, a pre-packed, locked suitcase would show up in my driveway with all of the things I was allowed to take and nothing else. ...continued on next page

OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 15

“MILKING IT,” CONTINUED...

Stepping off the train at my new town with the jar of dirt in one hand and the handle to my roller suitcase in the other, I didn’t make eye contact with any of the guards, standing in periodic posts along the station. I didn’t say anything when one of them grabbed a young woman wearing a polka dot dress up from one of the benches and put the barrel of their gun against her low back and shouted for her to keep walking. I told myself it was because I didn’t want to draw any extra attention to the jar but I knew that was bullshit, knew it in the wobble of my knees when one of them stopped me anyway. He grabbed me by the shoulder and twisted me back and I let my face collapse into the most feminine, droopy half-smile I could muster.

“Miss, you know I’m going to have to ask you what that is.”

Play the widow. I forced myself to look up at the guard. Of course, all I could see was my own face reflected in his sunglasses, the brim of his hat, and without looking down, the gun on his holster. “This?” I heard my own voice break and wished Meg was there to hear how well I was doing. “This is from my hometown. I’ve been — I’ve always been married to the same guy and then he died and I — I learned about the curse —” “The curse?”

“You know, a superstition.” I stared hard at his face until my eyes started to water on their own, and then I let go of my suitcase and rubbed my knuckles against the lids, pulling down, trying to force out a complete set of tears. “Everyone knows about it. It’s just something you have to do to shed misfortune, to — oh God, I’m sorry.” Now I wasn’t really trying to act. Now I squeezed my eyes shut and I really did see Henry’s glasses on the dining table. And what else? A book? No, he didn’t have a book out. It was something else. Newspaper, maybe. Everything got taken away so fast. “It was Henry who told me about it. Seems like I owe it to him.”

“Uh, yes —” The guard turned away from me, shuffling his feet. “Okay, sure. Just — don’t cry. Here —” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a light blue plastic bag. Like everything here, it had an arrow swooping across it like a grin. “Carry it in this and no one else will ask you about it. You know where you’re going?”

“Yes. Thank you, sir. Thank you so much.”

I stepped away with my bag and my suitcase and walked the rest of the way off the platform and to my new house without further incident. I thought the only thing I had to worry about was the guards. I thought that once my jar of dirt was protected in plastic branded by the corporation, nothing else could touch me.

*** The first day not taking my lactation medicine, I felt mostly the same. Maybe a little bit dizzier. I just wanted a phone so I could tell Meg how it went but nothing here was set up yet. Just the basic furniture and food. No wifi. I was alone with the jar of dirt but I didn’t dare touch it except to slip the pills in. That very first morning, the guard looked inside the plastic bag and asked me about the dirt, but I only had to explain it once and then it blended into the house effortlessly. Meg was right. About everything. I should have been wearing white and drinking wine back when I lived near her.

Even though I knew it would be useless, I sat on the couch and turned on the TV. Right there, in stunning HD even though there was

16 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

no internet or cable, was the man himself. The CEO. He stood at the edge of a green field, a dilapidated, cartoonish looking barn behind him. His bald head prickled pink. He had the chain of one of the silver dog tag necklaces in his hand. I brought my fingers to my own, felt the engraving with my number and the loop of the laser cut bell shape. Meg never wore hers. I don’t know why, but I kept mine on.

“Hi, there.” The CEO spoke like him and I were in a confidential board meeting. “When my company decided to take on climate change, we knew there was only one place to start. Factory farming in the United States was one of the largest contributors to —” I grabbed the remote off the side table and shut him off.

*** The second night, after I cooked myself the pre-portioned stir fry set up in the fridge, I laid down on the couch and stared at the ceiling fan until I fell asleep. Something was slightly off with it, so when it rotated around to the top it gave a little clicking noise.

I followed the thread of that clicking noise into the dark until I came out the other side into silence.

A green field, but this time, the cows were back. They saw me in their space and they all turned at the same time. I knew I should be afraid but I wasn’t, just kept walking toward them. The grass was tall. It scratched at the skin around my ankles and shins and I kept going. Was it still a stampede if you welcomed it? Was it still my body if it fed no one? The cows kept coming closer and they were loud. Louder than the train whistle or the pounding on the door every morning when the guards came to check my pill bottles and my trash cans.

The clicking.

The ceiling fan and the clicking came back and I snapped awake, sucking in air.

My whole body felt like it had been electrocuted, like every nerve ending was firing off at the same time.

A nightmare. God, I hadn’t had a nightmare since — “Since you were sixteen and started taking the pills.”

I jumped, throwing down the blanket I took from my bed to the couch and spun around. There, at the kitchen table (identically round as the one in my old house where his reading glasses sat after his body had begun decomposing) was Henry.

“Impossible. You’re —” “Dead. Oh, Vee.” The light above the table was on, but the rest of the house was dark, casting strange shadows across the bottom of his face. I moved toward him but he pulled back. “No. It’s best if you stay over there.”

“Why —Henry, I —” “Vee, I can’t believe you would do this.”

“Do what? The pills? I — it was Meg’s idea. I didn’t know they were suppressing nightmares, or whatever they were doing.

I’ll take them if you want me to, Henry.”

“You don’t know anything.” I couldn’t see him anymore but I knew from the tone of his voice he was shaking his head.

“Henry? Henry?”

I turned on every light like I could pin the

“My whole body felt like it had been electrocuted, like every nerve ending was firing off at the same time.”

ABOUT

THE AUTHOR

Born and raised in Spokane, Lauren Gilmore writes speculative fiction for YA and adult readerships. Her short story “Clotting” was featured in the HAUNTED edition of The Hayden’s Ferry Review. She is currently pursuing her MA in Literature and Social Justice from Lehigh University where she is bridging her interests in the digital humanities, American horror literature, feminist studies, and writing pedagogy. Her reported and analytical writing has recently appeared online in Horror Homeroom and Collider.

eyelids of the space open but it was just me in an empty house with two doses of medicine inside a jar of dirt. The stunning stupidity of what I was doing hit me all at once. Chalk? There was no chalk here. There was nothing here I could use to make milk.

There was nothing to camouflage myself. Of course Henry didn’t want me to break the rules. It was always Meg. Meg pushing me to wear white. Meg with her Merlot and her careless, stringy hair. I ran to the bathroom and dumped two pills into my hand and threw them back. I didn’t know if I would start lactating in time to meet the quota but it was worth a try. The medicine hit my blood stream fast, turning my whole body heavy and hard to move and I lowered myself into the bathtub and slept there until I heard the familiar knocking at the door.

*** With the medication inside me and Meg hundreds of miles away I could finally think clearly. I’d been acting rashly. I had been rude. I hadn’t gone over to meet my neighbor.

I went first thing the next morning.

Sheila, a woman in her mid-thirties whose husband was currently driving her milk across the state, led me inside to a coffee table set with tea and cookies.

“Sorry, I didn’t know you were expecting me.”

“I’ve been expecting you since you got here. Didn’t know which afternoon you’d finally come say hello.”

There was a click of disapproval in her voice. The house was identical to mine and was identical to Meg’s, but I couldn’t for the life of me imagine either of them in each other’s space. The cookies were delicious though. Little dollops of lemon shortbread. I didn’t know what to talk to this woman about. “You ever think about —” I snapped a cookie in half and a few of the crumbs trailed down into my lamp.

“No, nevermind.”

“No, tell me.” Her eyes were warm and better spirited now.

“You ever think about just — not making milk? What you would use to replace it?”

The woman froze with her teacup halfway between her plate and her mouth. “What on earth would compel you to ask me that?”

“Oh, nothing —” I shifted in my seat, ate one more cookie, and then left.

As I was stepping down off of her front porch, Sheila stood in front of her door with her arms crossed, her lips pressed together tight as a rosebud sprayed with too much insecticide so it wouldn’t open.

*** At home, I put my jar of dirt and my pill bottle down next to each other on the coffee table. I looked between the two of them, and then got itchy. I turned the TV on, but it was the same looped clip. “Hi, there. When my company decided to take on climate change, we knew there was only one place to start. Factory farming in the United States was one of the largest contributors to climate crisis. No one had proposed a plan that was big enough, bold enough —” “Oh, shut the hell up.” I tried the button to change the channel, even though I knew the image would be the same on every one.

An Andy Warhol print repeating itself through space. The CEO’s little smile twisting up in the sun. “I said, shut the hell up.” I turned the TV off and then threw the remote across the room.

If I could just call Meg, she would know what

to do. I could tell her about the dream. I could tell her I think the pills were repressing something even as they brought the milk out. I could tell her there’s a nightmare on the other side of the medication and I know how to access it. I could tell her — Or I can call Henry.

I sat back against the couch with a start. Without the pills, I could see him again. I could explain everything and he could explain to me how he was both dead and in my living room. We had love, once. It was always more than his initials on bottles of milk. It had to be.

That night, I skipped my medication again and I dreamed of nothing.

In the morning, when the pounding came at the door I didn’t even bother to close my robe before answering it. My chest was bare and the guard recoiled at the sight of me, bringing his hand up to his sunglasses. “Ma’am.”

“Sir.” I took my time reaching behind me, pulling the waistband around to the front.

“We got a report from your neighbor. Said that you were making concerning statements.”

“My husband just died. All I can make are concerning statements.”

“And we’re very sympathetic to that, but we’re going to have to have a closer look around this morning if you don’t mind —” He slid past me into the house and when I turned around to watch him, my eyes froze. There, back next to the kitchen table, was Henry.

He was standing with his arms crossed, staring at me. I knew that look. He had it sometimes when we got into an argument about Meg. He thought Meg should be more careful, that she was asking to get taken away and then Kyle would lose his wife. I always thought he was just worried about her. I thought.

He tipped his head to the side.

“Is there anything in this house that we should be aware of?”

“Pretty sure you’re aware of everything.” I stared at the guard.

He couldn’t see Henry. If he could see Henry, he would be addressing his questions to him. He’d jump into a different kind of civility. He’d say, sorry sir, I didn’t know a new husband had been assigned here.

No, Henry was only here for me. I kept eye contact with him.

There was a way to soften that look, but I needed to be closer to him. I needed to be able to put my hand on the back of his neck, to guide him into my face. That had worked, hadn’t it? Once upon a time, he had responded to my body. He had laughed at my jokes while we cooked together in the kitchen. I’d watched him read the newspaper at the kitchen table and when there was a cartoon strip he thought I’d like he cut it out and put it on the fridge with a magnet. When the heart attack came out of nowhere as he was moving the trash can up from the street, it was like a dagger through a perfectly happy life, a tear in the universe.

Wasn’t it?

While the guard was in the bathroom looking through the bottles, Henry picked up the plastic bag on the table, held it up so the arrow pointed toward the window.

No, I mouthed. But he kept going. Reached inside, pulled out the jar of dirt. He brought it up over his head. The guard wouldn’t be in the bathroom for very long. I closed the space between us and this time he didn’t dip back and this time I had nothing in mind but the glass jar. It wobbled between both of our hands for a minute, but he was taller than me and his arms reached a solid six inches above my highest grip so I had to jump a little and flick at the base of it. With one high jump, my fingers made contact with the bottom of the glass and it flipped out and the glass shattered. The dirt spread across the table. The guard came barreling out of the bathroom and had his gun off his hip before he could see anything and what would he have seen? A single worm inching its way along, untangling itself from the clots of soil and the little white pills with the pink lines like ribbons around their waists. And me, alone in the kitchen where I had always lived. When the first shot rang out I swear it was timed with a ding on Sheila’s oven. n

OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 17

PROFILE

PARANORMAL

PONDERINGS Spokane ghost hunter Amanda Paulson shares her otherworldly explorations with thousands online

BY CHEY SCOTT

Amanda Paulson at Spokane’s infamously haunted 1,000 Steps. DEREK HARRISON PHOTO

A

fear of death and what may come after drives Amanda Paulson to probe the paranormal. On this ever-evolving quest, the 31-year-old Spokane resident spends her free time delving deep into the secrets of dark places. She’s spent nights investigating the seemingly unexplainable at Colfax’s 127-year-old St. Ignatius Hospital, the historic Davenport Hotel and famously eerie locales across the U.S. like the Lizzie Borden house in Massachusetts and Waverly Hills Sanitorium in Kentucky.

The ghostly encounters she’s experienced at these places, and her preferred methods for paranormal research, Paulson shares with tens of thousands of followers on social media platforms — TikTok, Instagram and YouTube — under her handle prettyfnspooky.

“Definitely a big part of my investigation is to come to terms with my own mortality because I don’t want to die,” Paulson says. “I want to understand if maybe I could become a ghost in the afterlife, but I’m also known to be a little more skeptical.

“I call myself a paranormal ponderer,” she continues, “and I enjoy deep conversations into why it happens.

Our perception of paranormal phenomena can change the activity itself.”

Paulson’s interest in the otherworldly dates back to her early childhood in Montana.

“We lived in a haunted duplex. I remember walking in, and immediately thinking it was haunted. I was just predisposed to the creepy vibe,” she recalls.

One day while alone in her room, a vase moved across the dresser on its own.

“It really scared me,” she says. “I didn’t think, ‘Wow, I want to hunt ghosts now,’ I thought, ‘Wow, this is terrifying.’ That was the catalyst for an entire lifetime of paranormal work.”

Paulson never forgot that pivotal moment and applied to join a professional ghost-hunting team when she turned 18. With that group she learned how to use popular paranormal investigation tools preferred by modern ghost hunters like thermal cameras and electromagnetic field (EMF) meters to try to detect and communicate with the other side. After moving to Spokane a few years later to escape her hometown of Billings, Paulson began sharing her ghostly interests on her blog, Pretty Fn Spooky (prettyfnspooky.com).

“When I started my blog, it was just to share my love of the paranormal with others, not with the intent of becoming a professional investigator again,” she says. “It just started as this creative project, but quickly evolved into me getting back into investigating, and having people reach out to come and investigate businesses and houses.

And here I am today, traveling across the country to investigate big locations.”

With a collective total of more than 40,000 followers, Paulson has since been able to monetize her content to the extent that Pretty Fn Spooky is a part-time venture in addition to her 9-to-5 job at a local credit union.

“Monetizing the content creation has been great, because that helps supplement my investigations, but investigating and studying the occult, I do that every single day,” she says.

Paulson is the subject of a forthcoming 2022 documentary by a Seattle-based filmmaker titled Death Is With Me. She’s also shared her insight on podcasts and online publications, and continues to work as a volunteer tour guide at the Northwest Museum of Arts and Culture’s Campbell House, located down the block from her own apartment inside the historic Finch Mansion of Browne’s Addition. She hopes to see a “dark history” tour she developed for the Campbell House debut next year.

Expanding her reach into local history even more, Paulson also serves as the city-at-large representative on the Spokane Historic Preservation Commission.

T

he most scared Paulson’s ever been while trying to pull back the thin veil between the living and the dead was during an overnight stay in the infamous Lizzie Borden House in Fall River, Massachusetts. Now a bed-and-breakfast and museum, the twostory home is where Borden’s parents were gruesomely murdered with an axe in 1892. Borden was accused of the murder, and later acquitted. This past spring, Paulson found herself completely alone in the 175-year-old house on Easter Sunday.

“I had seen all of the house, and knew no one was there. Then I heard someone walking back and forth above me in the maid’s room,” she recalls. “I’m trying to rationalize it, and then I hear walking come down the hallway.

“That was the start of an entire night filled with chaos for me,” she continues. “I heard a woman’s voice in the hallway, and saw weird specks of light and thought I was losing my mind.”

Paulson — usually pretty unruffled when witnessing the paranormal — spent the rest of the night in her car.

“I heard a woman’s voice in the hallway, and saw weird specks of light and thought I was losing my mind.”

FROM TOP: St. Ignatius Hospital, Waverly Hills Sanitorium and the Lizzie Borden House, all spots Paulson has investigated. AMANDA PAULSON PHOTOS

Locally, she’s lent her expertise to several spookedout residents, including a family whose young son believed a baby blanket made by his recently deceased grandmother was talking to him.

“Some strange things were happening, and the son was really scared to go to bed,” Paulson says. “So I’m interviewing them, and 30 minutes into it I feel a hand on the back of my head and I jumped. They looked so scared and I felt so bad! But I was able to give them some comfort and make them feel better about housing a spirit, versus making it leave.”

For her latest investigation, Paulson explored St. Ignatius Hospital in Colfax, a spot embracing its haunted reputation by offering late-night ghost tours for the paranormally curious.

Around midnight, Paulson and a few others were set up in the hospital’s most notoriously haunted spot, Rose’s Room, that once housed an eldery, mentally ill woman while the building served as an assisted living facility in more recent decades. It was there that Paulson says their equipment (a structured light sensor camera, or SLS, and an audio recording app) began giving signs of a tall figure’s presence, and something else unseen with a voice like Rose’s.

“We played music and tried to ‘lend’ some of our energy to the spirits so that they could turn on three flashlights at once, and they eventually did,” she says. (A video of this encounter is posted on her Prettyfnspooky TikTok and Instagram.)

Whether you believe in ghosts, want to believe, or don’t think they’re real at all, Paulson’s goal isn’t to convince her social media followers to make a firm decision on any side, but rather to nurture that inherent curiosity, as well as her own.

“I definitely ride on the coattails of a handful of really crazy experiences, and that is what keeps me going, because it’s rarely like that, and definitely not like on TV shows,” she says.

“There is no editing of an eight-hour investigation.

It’s a lot of boredom, a lot of nothing. And then I think to when I was 7 and saw a vase move across a dresser.

I can’t ignore that happened. The unexplainable is possible, and I keep chasing it.” n cheys@inlander.com

OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 19

CULTURE | DIGEST

THE BUZZ BIN

Greta Van Fleet performs at Austin City Limits.

TODD OWYOUNG/ACL FEST PHOTO

FOLLOW THE MUSIC

WHEREVER YOU GO, THERE YOU ARE The third season of Netflix’s You dropped just in time for “dark and twisty” season. As Joe continues convincing himself that he’s “not that person anymore” — he’s got a baby now! — the show continues evolving, highlighting new elements of human nature that could just make someone snap. We saw young dating letdowns that can drive you totally crazy in the first season, and more “mature” relationship drama in the second. Now the third season gives wealthy suburban family life its lashes, from hating on selfabsorbed mommy bloggers and “missing white woman syndrome,” to featuring inappropriate Mrs. Robinson dynamics. The question, as always, is: Who’s really the bad guy? (SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL)

Finding artists you never knew you’d love is the magic that makes festivals so incredible

BY SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL

O

K, so here’s the thing: I know that music festivals can be super cramped, stinky, sweaty, overstimulating places for a lot of people.

There are usually thousands of people there, you basically have to be a venue sleuth to find the porta-potties least likely to run out of TP, and there are lots of chances to spend way too much money on food, merch and drinks.

But I love it.

I love the experience of feeling a performance (both figuratively and literally thanks to loudspeakers) in the company of perfect strangers.

I love looking around after a good beat drop and seeing the same stupid smile I’m wearing on the faces of other humans around me. I love when an artist gets an audience of 10,000 or more people to shut the hell up long enough that you can focus on a beautiful, quiet moment together.

I also love that festivals encourage you to find new artists, whether they’re in a genre you already love or one you don’t listen to as often.

After COVID-19 forced a drought of performances, I recently undertook the insane catch-up task of attending two weekend-long festivals in a row. Of course we had artists we made sure to see, but for those gaps in our schedules my friends and I followed the music and found some new-to-us gems that are well worth the listen.

GG MAGREE

We could’ve gone down to the main stage at Beyond Wonderland at the Gorge to see the Chainsmokers, but once GG Magree started up on the bass-heavy stage where my group was already planted, there was no tearing us away from Magree’s set. As a DJ-singer who happens to be from Australia, Magree reminded me in some ways of one of my favorite EDM artists, Alison

20 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

Wonderland. But Magree has a somewhat darker edge to her style that was particularly mesmerizing in a live setting. Try “Nervous Habits” or keep an eye out for live shows, where she truly shines.

BIJOU AND DR. FRESCH

Bijou, a “G-House” artist, has collaborated with Dr. Fresch, whose hip-hop and rap remixes are branded as “Future Ghetto,” with driving house and trap beats.

Both artists played great sets at Beyond Wonderland on the smallest stage. Try their collaboration “Hello” (it’s explicit), or Dr. Fresch’s “Fire.”

GRETA VAN FLEET

I’m apparently turning into an uncool older person who doesn’t keep up with new artists anymore, because an artist that was totally new to me at Austin City Limits (ACL) is kind of a big deal. We decided to check out this quartet of three brothers and a friend calling themselves Greta Van Fleet after learning that their set during the first weekend of shows was lauded as a must-see performance. Boy, was that accurate. Watching this band is about as close to watching Led Zeppelin as you’re gonna get, with some hints of flair that harken to Queen. Incredible vocals, great music and nostalgiafeeding fun. Try “Light My Love” or “Stardust Chords.”

MADEON

Toward the end of ACL, we knew we wanted to see two larger artists to round out the festival, but we had a break between sets. That’s when the soulful sounds of Jon Batiste might have captured our hearts, had we not seen the lights and heard the intro to Madeon on another stage nearby. Following a crowd of dance-music lovers, we were introduced to this French DJ-singer and his upbeat electropop. Try “Dream Dream Dream” or “All My Friends.” n

BINGING WITH BABISH If you’re thrifty (which I am) and avoiding binge-tempting streaming services (ditto), YouTube is a boon. Get your pop culture and cooking fix with Babish — aka Andrew Rea — the bearded, tattooed star of Binging with Babish, whose mellifluous voice guides you through iconic film and TV dishes. Grits from My Cousin Vinny. SpongeBob “krabby” patties. And the latest: dalgona candy from Squid Game. Not partial to pop culture? The Babish Culinary Universe includes Basics with Babish, Botched with Babish and Being with Babish, for cooking shows with a side of touchy-feely. (CARRIE SCOZZARO) THIS WEEK’S PLAYLIST Noteworthy new music arriving in stores and online Oct 29: THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS, Book. As its title might suggest, the quirky alt-rockers’ 23rd studio album is meant to be accompanied by a 144-page art book packed with photos and lyrics (you can also buy the album as a standalone).

ED SHEERAN, =. The ginger singer-songwriter’s prior albums were +, ×, and ÷. He’s running out of math symbols! After -, what’s left? ≤? √? ∞?

THE WAR ON DRUGS, I Don’t Live Here Anymore. America’s most acclaimed bland rock band returns! (SETH SOMMERFELD)

CULTURE | OPERA

The Torments of Love Taking a cue from film noir, Inland Northwest Opera’s all-new production of Orpheus and Eurydice explores grief and ambiguity

BY E.J. IANNELLI

B

y the time the German composer Christoph Gluck debuted his Orpheus and Eurydice in 1762, the myth of Orpheus had been circulating for well over two millennia. To write an opera retelling the tale of the lyrestrumming poet wooing the beautiful nymph Eurydice and then losing her to the poisonous bite of a viper might have seemed a little redundant. And so Gluck chose for his entry point the fateful moment where one tragic episode ends and another begins.

From the very first moment, Gluck’s Orpheus is in the throes of grief. His wife has already been spirited away to the Underworld, presumably lost forever. But then Amore, the god of love, moved by genuine sympathy or a mischievous sense of sport, offers him the chance to descend into the Underworld and retrieve Eurydice, albeit with two conditions. Orpheus can neither set eyes on her nor explain why until they’ve returned to the world of the living. This being both opera and Greek myth, it’s not hard to guess where things might be headed.

Dan Wallace Miller is directing a new production of Orpheus and Eurydice for the Inland Northwest Opera — the organization’s first indoor, in-person performance since the pandemic cut INO’s 2020 season short.

“I’m particularly drawn to the Gluck version because, of all of the myriad adaptations of the Orphic myth, this is maybe the most ethereal and the simplest. He distilled it right down to three very specific characters: Orpheus, Eurydice and Amore,” Miller says.

The other quality Miller highlights is the nature of Amore’s edict. Instead of forbidding Orpheus from seeing, touching or talking to Eurydice, as often happens in other versions, Amore only has two caveats.

“What that does is it shifts the entire focus of the moral of the story from one about faith and the will of

the gods into one that’s about an interpersonal relationduce another note of complexity to her character. She ship conflict between Orpheus and Eurydice,” he says. and her husband are expecting in January.

“It really just opens up so many interesting avenues.

“It’s an amazing thing, pregnancy, but it’s funny how Did Eurydice want to be whisked away from her eternal the body is on full display when you’re doing a role, repose? What are Orpheus’ motivations for going down right?” she chuckles. “Being almost seven months preginto the Underworld in the first place?” nant will be a new take on Eurydice. Was she pregnant Miller is eager to capitalize on those ambiguities as when she died? I think it could raise some really cool part of this updated reimagining of Gluck’s opera. As questions.” played by soprano Jocelyn Claire Thomas, the character For Birsan, other aspects of this production will seem of Amore will not necessarily be the “happy-go-lucky, chereassuringly familiar. She’s appearing opposite an Orrubic” Cupid that audiences might expect. She’s less of an pheus played by mezzo soprano Emily Fons, with whom “altruistic, beneficent force and more of a Rita Hayworthshe’s worked several times. style, vampish character who is endlessly entertained by this mortal’s grief.”

Working closely with his longtime collaborator and set designer Christopher Mumaw, Miller is also trying to develop an aesthetic that is “looking at the story through the lens of Orpheus’ grief” and captures his tortured psyche.

“When I direct, I take a lot of inspiration from film. And in old film noir like Lost Weekend or Moontide there are a lot of these wonderful, surreal, insane montage sequences of a guy going on a bender, where he’s just completely lost it. Swirling cameras, neon lights, the whole deal,” he says.

To recreate that inherently cinematic experience on the stage of the Fox Mezza soprano Emily Fons plays Orpheus (right). COURTESY OF INLAND NORTHWEST OPERA Theater, they’ll “use traditional theater elements to twist the environment around Orpheus.”

“I feel like we’ve done a million things together,” she For instance, the cocktail advertisements that appear in says. “We were brother and sister in Boris Godunov at The the opening scene, now set in a 1950s-era bar, become a Lyric. And then we did a Figaro in Boston together. We’re recurring motif. Like Dante’s successive circles of hell, both from Wisconsin, we’re both named Emily, and so “each subsequent realm of the Underworld that Orpheus we’ve found our share of things to connect with over the journeys into is tied to those neon signs,” now “twisted years.” and bent into abstract shapes.”

Their established chemistry combined with inventive set pieces and, in Miller’s words, “crazy surprises” like a rpheus wouldn’t know such profound grief had pyrotechnic Dance of the Furies, seem likely to achieve it not been for the immense joy he experienced his and INO’s goal of a “return to indoor theaters with with Eurydice while she was alive, which makes something that would make a pretty big splash.” her character a constant presence, even when she isn’t on “This is such a unique and interesting opera,” Miller stage. Here she’s played by soprano Emily Birsan. says. “It was written a little bit earlier than a lot of the “You don’t see her much,” Birsan says. “She’s talked really, truly great Mozart pieces, though it definitely has about for the whole opera, and you get a glimpse into that mid-classical vibe. But it feels so different. It is really her emotions and how she reacts and everything, but it’s about letting the music drive the narrative as much as the her non-living state. So I have to really fill in the blanks text. It’s a beautiful little gem that you don’t see perof who she was as a person before and where she’s come formed very often.” n from, [because] the emotional state in which you leave a person is going to impact your state when you see them Orpheus and Eurydice • Oct. 29 & 31; Fri at 7:30 pm, again. It’s a lot more fun to imagine that things are a little Sun at 3 pm • $25–$92 • Martin Woldson Theater at more complicated when she sees Orpheus again.” the Fox • 1001 W. Sprague Ave. • inlandnwopera.com Her performance aside, Birsan can’t help but intro• 509-624-1200

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Whitney Jacques of Verdant Hare Farm with her resident pigs. YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

AGRICULTURE

After First Frost How two local farmers extend the season past harvest’s peak while investing in the future of farming

BY CARRIE SCOZZARO

F

arming is a full-time job, with a to-do list that bookends each year’s harvest season, from late spring through mid-fall here in the Inland Northwest, depending on the crop.

Many farmers utilize Community Supported Agriculture (CSA) subscriptions to get a jump on the season.

Also called a farmshare, a CSA is essentially an investment in the farm — a share — in exchange for what the farm produces, like meat or produce, and on a mutually agreed upon schedule, typically weekly throughout the harvest. CSAs can be pre-paid — sometimes months in advance of when crops are started or livestock is born — pay-as-you-go or some other model.

CSAs are only one source of regular revenue, however. Many farmers now employ multiple practices to stretch the definition of farming season, from selling additional items they derive from the farm to extending the CSA timeframe. Such practices promote more and different income streams, a larger or diversified customer base, and the kind of vertical integration that helps other industries mitigate risk, especially in farming’s climatedependent business model.

There are as many ways to extend the season as there are types of farmers. Idaho-based Prairie Home Farm, for example, sells pies from their pumpkin patch, and Greentree Naturals sells seeds to a southern Idaho cooperative.

22 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

In the Spokane area, two first-generation farmers are also implementing ways to extend the season and sustain their own operations, while also planting the seed for future generations.

W

hitney Jacques admires the animal that inspired her farm’s name, Verdant Hare.

“Hares are fertile and clever, changing with the season, running a step ahead,” says Jacques, who also likes the color, feeling and scent that “verdant” evokes.

Jacques worked on other organization’s farms for nearly a decade before starting Verdant Hare, including Washington State University’s organic farm and Catholic Charities’ Food for All Farm, where she started the Volunteer Farmer Intern Program. She hoped to pay forward the assistance she received as a budding farmer, but when COVID hit, she had an epiphany: A hands-on intern program wasn’t sustainable if people couldn’t gather.

Moreover, she was ready to go all-in with a place befitting what she calls her “big energy.”

“I’d been working for other people for a long time because it was super safe,” says Jacques, who’s held onto the dream of being a farmer since she was a little girl in Alaska.

In 2020, she started Verdant Hare on 20 acres of

leased, historic farmland west of the Iller Creek Conservation area off the Palouse Highway.

Jacques’ garden and livestock operations both offer opportunities to extend the traditional farming season. A weekly fruit and vegetable CSA from Verdant Hare runs July through September, a typical season. But from February through June, Jacques also works with Main Market Co-op to produce garden starts for their customers, and for Verdant Hare.

Also helping with post-harvest sales is the farm’s livestock menagerie: 10 turkeys, a Jersey milk cow and calf, and 22 pigs Jacques will slaughter for meat in December.

Verdant Hare sells eggs from 75 laying hens through its CSA, while an additional 100 birds are destined for the chopping block, and then on to customers’ refrigerators and freezers. And during October, Jacques has been on sheep-breeding duty to prepare for lamb-a-palooza next spring.

Jacques’ 23 Clun Forest, Finn and Romney sheep are vital to Verdant Hare. They provide both meat — harvesting is on November’s to-do list — and milk. Two ewes, Hilda and Temple, also yield richly colored fleece, which Jacques gets spun into yarn and also sells as raw fleece to provide a modest but year-round source of income that’s independent of weather. ...continued on page 24

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FOOD | AGRICULTURE “AFTER FIRST FROST,” CONTINUED...

In addition to all this, Jacques shares her time farm’s initial output was donated to Catholic and expertise. For between $50 and $300, visitors Charities’ Food for All program. can tour the farm and schedule a consultation Fast-forward to 2021, and Courage to Grow with Jacques (by phone, in person or at their own is thriving with several CSA options ($750-$950 farm) or take a class. for 20 weeks and $1,400-$1,800 for 40 weeks) In Verdant Hare’s Homesteading 101 class, varying in amounts of food, and available for for example, participants learn to raise and Spokane-area delivery and farm pickup. butcher chickens, milk a cow and cultivate a garA tall hoop house protects gorgeous purpleden through planning, planting, harvesting and black tomatoes, peppers and eggplant from both putting the garden to bed for winter. summer’s intense heat and fall’s advancing cold “I really think it’s important weather. Greens, squash and other for people to have opportunities to produce still await harvest in early learn hands-on,” says Jacques, who October, but some still won’t be also donates her time to a group picked until winter. As extra proof local third graders who visit the tection from the cold, a low hoop farm twice weekly to learn about of plastic can quickly be assembled VERDANT HARE farm life. over the carrots, for example. verdanthare.com, “I really hope there’s a little These orange beauties are destined 509-723-3038 ‘Whitney’ in there,” she says of the for the farm’s new RBG Regenerakids. tive Agriculture Season Extension COURAGE TO Project, named after the late GROW FARMS ike Verdant Hare, founders Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader couragetogrowfarms.com, at Courage to Grow Farms Ginsburg at the request of a donor 509-270-7264 in the Greenacres area of who helped fund the project.

Spokane Valley are first-generation To start, Courage to Grow farmers passionate about sustainable agriculture, is collaborating with other local farms under but also about helping expand the farming comthe RBG Project umbrella to deliver produce munity. The farm’s name comes from an album year-round to area food banks and shelters. The

by Rebelution, a reggae band its owners admire. goal is to give out 1,000 boxes by year’s end, “We had no land, just an idea and sheer distributed via four batches of 250 boxes, from motivation,” says Shaneese Dunigan, who started Sweet Mercy Farm, Mighty Microgreens, Monthe farm with partner Phillip Moore in 2018. The tague Heritage Farms, Kobes Valley Farm, amd couple was living in a duplex with their kids and Dogwild Farm. Courage to Grow also includes growing microgreens to sell commercially when a veggie-forward recipes with each box. chance Father’s Day gift changed everything.

A second part of the RBG Project is a Moore received Curtis Stone’s The Urban work-in-progress, involving not the growth of a Farmer: Growing Food for Profit on Leased and Borparticular crop, but of other farms. rowed Land, and by February 2019 the couple had Plans for that include a variation on the 10,000 plant starts in the living room. Their hunt Airbnb or residency model by leasing housing for land netted several temporary parcels, totalto interested participants who’d also learn about ing half an acre, including their backyard. They urban farming and take that knowledge back to were in business. wherever they’re from, says Moore.

In March of 2020, the couple purchased a Those plans are still in flux, however. After bus to live and travel in, planning to share their this season, the four-acre parcel Courage to Grow newfound gardening knowledge. The statewide is currently leasing will be unavailable; nearby shutdown squelched that dream, so they parked a construction crew hustles to finish building a the 40-foot bus — home, sweet home for a while house in this growing part of Spokane Valley. longer — leasing what would be the first of a sucTheir hunt for new land to farm continues, but cession of plots. the couple is optimistic.

“By May we had sold 40 CSA shares and “It can’t be hard anymore,” says Dunigan, rewere farming 100 freshly-created, 50-foot long flecting on the challenges they’ve faced and met. beds,” says Dunigan, adding that much of the “We just have to be along in our journey.” n

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REVIEW

EUROPEAN VACATION Wes Anderson takes his ornate flights of fancy across the pond in The French Dispatch

BY JOSH BELL

A

t what point does a signature style become a crutch? For devoted followers of filmmaker Wes Anderson, the answer may be “never,” as his increasingly fussy, hermetically sealed approach to making movies continues to bring him acclaim and admiration.

With The French Dispatch, Anderson hones in even further on minutiae, at the expense of characters and story, until the movie becomes an inert diorama. Anderson creates lovely, often breathtaking displays, but they’re completely airless.

Part of the problem is that The French Dispatch is an anthology, and none of the individual segments give Anderson enough room to develop characters with the same detail and depth as his elaborate visual tableaux. The title refers to a venerable New Yorker-esque magazine that is releasing its final issue in 1975 following the death of its founder and editor, Arthur Howitzer Jr. (Bill Murray).

The movie is divided into three stories presented as articles from the magazine, along with a framing sequence about Howitzer’s career and death, plus a short introductory note from writer Herbsaint Sazerac (Owen Wilson).

Sazerac takes the viewer/reader on a tour of the fictional city of Ennui, France, which has a similar relationship to Paris as Gotham City has to New York. It’s the same, only more so, a stylized and idealized version of the city as envisioned by someone who might, say, read

26 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

The Inlander newsroom is not quite as stylish as the one in Wes Anderson’s new film.

ALSO OPENING ANTLERS

A teacher (Keri Russel) in rural Oregon notices a boy in her class has been acting strangely. It turns out, he may be harboring a horrific mythical creature who is slaughtering the townsfolk. (SS) Rated R.

about it in a highbrow literary magazine. The urban planAll three stories come to rather anticlimactic endning seems to consist entirely of Anderson’s signature ings, and the middle story is the weakest, lacking even symmetrical designs and clockwork mise en scène, a an anticlimax. Anderson fares best when working from series of windup toys that he can put into place and then influences as fastidious as his own work, from New Yorker slowly wind down. illustrations to Jacques Tati films to European comics like Tilda Swinton, Frances McDormand and Jeffrey The Adventures of Tintin. He’s ill-suited to political mateWright play the three journalists behind the rial, and his approach pales main stories, which are presented mostly in in comparison to the vibrant, THE FRENCH DISPATCH daring French New Wave black and white (with sometimes jarring transiRated R tions to color) and in the boxy Academy ratio. filmmakers who were an Directed by Wes Anderson In the first story, Benicio Del Toro plays a essential part of that student convicted murderer who is also a brilliant artist, Starring Benicio Del Toro, Timothée movement. and whose muse/lover (Léa Seydoux) is a guard Chalamet, Jeffrey Wright The French Dispatch is more at the prison where he’s incarcerated. The artist exhausting than entertaining, spends years working on his masterpiece, to the consterand the overstuffed cast (including Anderson regulars nation but eventual vindication of his wealthy patron like Jason Schwartzman, Bob Balaban and Saoirse Ronan (Adrien Brody). showing up to barely utter a line) has little room to creThe second story focuses on the student activists ate fully realized characters who exist outside a series who transformed French society in the 1960s, led by the of somewhat esoteric references. As is often the case in passionate but naive Zeffirelli (Timothée Chalamet), who actual literary nonfiction, the writers stand out more than has an affair with McDormand’s clearly compromised their subjects. journalist. In the final story, Wright’s food critic witAnderson films like The Royal Tenenbaums and Moonrise nesses a kidnapping when he’s invited to dine with the Kingdom can be genuinely emotionally affecting, but The local police commissioner (Mathieu Amalric) just before French Dispatch has all the emotional impact of a limitedthe man’s son is abducted. A madcap chase, depicted edition collectible, never to be opened. Like those highpartially via animation, ensues. end pieces, it’s for fans and completists only. n

FILM | REVIEW

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Not So Bright

This Night eventually starts to feel endless.

ultimately took her own life. It isn’t the most thoroughly developed or authentic feeling piece of information as it is mostly conveyed in brief, fleeting glimpses of her mother in mirrors. This speaks to the persistent and prevailing problem that the film is never able to fully grapple with the deeper themes it introduces.

Wright has been criticized for prioritizing style over substance, which creates a false dichotomy. He needn’t nor shouldn’t sacrifice his penchant for stylized presentation. That is what makes him distinct. A more substantive story and

BY CHASE HUTCHINSON developed characters would bolster the impact of n Last Night in Soho, writer-director Edgar this visual style, not undercut it.

Wright returns with his signature flair for viInstead, the story becomes directionless and brant visuals though with a decidedly darker repetitive the longer it goes on. When it keeps sensibility lurking beneath the sparkling surface. repeating scenes where Eloise runs aimlessly He spins an initially intriguing tale that takes us around, the film itself begins to feel similarly through time before getting utterly tangled up in uncertain about where it wants to go or what itself in a woefully messy final act. it wants to say. The characters get lost in this The film begins quite well and finds a good meandering malaise. rhythm that it can’t sustain. It tells the story of Despite McKenzie’s performance, Eloise is aspiring fashion designer Eloise who leaves her not as fully formed of a character as she could small town to move to London to pursue her be and the side characters are no better. Michael dreams. She is played brilliantly Ajao as John is reduced by the tactful Thomasin McKenzie to being a largely disposLAST NIGHT IN SOHO able love interest to Eloise. who is tailor-made for this character Rated R in her best performance since her Towards the end, he is breakout role in Leave No Trace. Eloise Directed by Edgar Wright referred to briefly as “the feels like she is from a different time, Starring Anya Taylor-Joy, boy,” which serves as an old-fashioned in her music tastes and Thomasin McKenzie, Michael Ajao unintentionally revealing style, and that makes her a bullying statement about how little target for her classmates. the film seems to care for his character. Whether However, it also makes her perfectly suited it is Eloise’s grandmother who mostly exists to be drawn into the history of London in a quite over the phone or her landlady who becomes a literal sense. When she moves out of student crucially central part of the story, the characters housing to escape the bullying, she rents a room border on being paper thin when they should that every night transports her back into the have been more. Even Taylor-Joy is an underworld of the 1960s and into the shoes of aspiring written background character at best. singer Sandie (Anya Taylor-Joy). Sometimes a There is still much to be taken in by for those more passive observer while at other times an seeking interesting visual composition. It is the active participant, Eloise soon discovers that the most full jump Wright has made into horror and glitz and glamor that draws her to Sandie’s life he shows he has an eye for creating some genuguards a darker horror that will begin to bleed inely frightening sequences. His love of music into her own life. She will have to find the truth shines through, working in concert with the enerunderneath it all in order to escape this dark past. getic scenes of dance and dread in equal measure.

That is all that needs to or should be said It just is stifled by a last act that feels frantic and about the plot as the film is built on mysterious indecisive. A staircase scene in particular throws revelations that, while not entirely well executed, everything at the wall, an overcompensation that are still worth preserving from spoilers. Informsums up how the film should’ve developed confiing all this is the fact that Eloise has a history of dence in telling a more solid story underneath all mental illness in her family as her late mother the visual splendor. n

Director Edgar Wright’s visual flair can’t save his new horror film Last Night in Soho

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Memphis songwriter Cory Branan JOSHUA BLACK WILKINS PHOTO

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SONGCRAFT

Singing Subversions

BABY BAR HALLOWEEN SHOW Sat, Oct 30 at 8 pm Baby Bar $10 THE BLACK JACKET SYMPHONY PRESENTS LED ZEPPELIN IV Sun, Oct 31 at 8 pm Bing Crosby Theater $25–$33

Songwriter Cory Branan breaks down the craft behind some of his best songs

POST ANIMALS, HOT FLASH HEAT WAVE, REPTALIENS Tue, Nov 2 at 8 pm Lucky You Lounge $16–$18

BY SETH SOMMERFELD

A

s someone who regularly saw 100-plus concerts a year pre-pandemic, I feel the following declarative statements carries some weight: Cory Branan is my favorite singer-songwriter to see play live.

Heck, Cory Branan is also my favorite guitar player to see live.

His approach to hammering an acoustic’s six strings doesn’t feel like anyone else’s. There’s a swift dexterity to his picking that’s great, but it’s when he gets off-kilter that he really shines.

Branan treats his guitar like it’s his longtime best friend who may have drunkenly said some cross words about his wife and now they’re engaged in a bar brawl. He attacks his instrument, banging the body and pummeling the strings with atypical rhythmic tempos. Even in the calm moments, he’ll bust out impromptu pace changes that stretch out the quiet moments, then seconds later scurry to make up for lost time.

And that’s all before getting to the fact that he’s one of the cleverest lyricists around. No singer-songwriter quite as effectively walks the line between sweet Southern charm and rebellious razor’s-edge rabble-rouser. It’s the reason I never miss a chance to see Branan live, whether it’s in cow-skull adorned folky venues, dingy punk clubs, or even once in the corner of a hotel lobby at SXSW. Since his songwriting has always stuck out from the pack, we chatted with Branan about the process behind some of his discography’s standout songs.

28 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

“ANOTHER NIGHTMARE IN AMERICA,” ADIOS (2017)

Branan’s most sharp-tongued protest song, “Another Nightmare in America” acts as a rallying cry against police violence by adapting the partial perspective of a racist officer. Despite being written years before George Floyd’s murder, its bitter bile remains ever relevant.

“That’s the whole thing,” Branan says. “I wrote it after Ferguson, but it is, unfortunately, quite the evergreen subject in this country. I can’t wait for it to be non-relevant.

“I was just spitting mad. But I know, as a white Southern male, this is not my story to tell, but this is my country and this is a shameful disgrace. And I still wanted to write about it. And so I went, ‘I’ll write it from the point of view of the racist killer cop.’”

It’s a biting critique of the American dream in a similar “musical Trojan Horse with gutting lyrics hidden inside” mold to what Randy Newman did in the ’70s with Sail Away, but with much more blunt force trauma.

“It’s sort of a sonic experiment,” Branan says. “I wanted to make it so catchy that you’re tempted to sort of bop your head and not listen to the words. That’s why I started without any music and I get that line in: “You uppity little ghost.” And as soon as you hear that trigger word — uppity — there’s no way to not listen to the lyrics.”

The key is that the song slightly stretches beyond simply being the character’s completely un-self-aware perspective to frame the acts he’s committing as true horrors.

SAWYER BROWN Thur, Nov 4 at 7:30 pm Northern Quest Casino $39-$69 KUINKA, STRANGE HOTELS Fri, Nov 5 at 8 pm Lucky You Lounge $15-$18 GRANGER SMITH Wed, Nov 10 at 8 pm Knitting Factory $25-$27 BARONESS Wed, Nov 17 at 8 pm Lucky You Lounge $60 TRANS-SIBERIAN ORCHESTRA Fri, Nov 26 at 7:30 pm Spokane Arena $50-$70 Be sure to check with venues about vaccination/COVID test requirements.

“Normally when I do character songs, I just completely go into that character,” says Branan. “Growing up where I grew up in Mississippi, I know these just awful, awful mindsets. But it was a disgusting sort of thing, when I started doing it as a character study. And that’s when I realized that I couldn’t do it as a character fully. You can’t put poetry in the mouth of a f---ing bigot.

They’re not capable of it. They don’t have the scope.”

“THE PRETTIEST WAITRESS IN MEMPHIS,” 12 SONGS (2006)

On a much lighter note, “The Prettiest Waitress in Memphis” was the tune that fully hooked me on Branan the first time I saw him live a decade ago. At first, it’s a pretty straightforward melodic rock infatuation ode to a waitress, but then takes a surprise turn that I’ve seen make a crowd full of punks literally cheer.

“It’s pretty much guy-meets-girl-in-a-bar,” Branan says. “I find that if you work in a cliched format, it comes loaded with expectations. Like the movie Inception is just a heist flick, so they can do a-movie-in-a-movie-in-a-movie. Because you know all the shit in a heist flick; we gotta break in and get this... It comes already loaded with detail, so then you can screw with it.”

Branan knows there’s a magic to the song’s turn, but also knows he can’t tap that well too often.

“The whole thing — the pivot at the end — is all supported structurally by everything else, you know? Everything’s leading up to her saying, ‘This’ll all change eventually.’ ’Cuz every line is like, ‘A small stack of singles from a hard double shift will do terrible things to a smile’ or ‘she’s only gonna be that pretty for a while.’ And I’m just setting up the punchline. She’s like, ‘I can only do this for so long before this f---ing town or this f---ing job eats away at me.’ I think that’s why people respond to the song, because it’s like, oh, this is a fun little thing, but, oh, there’s something real going on here. And then it has the payoff twist. You know it’s a little big (cheesy voice), Ta da!

“I mean, you’ve got to be careful with those kinds of things because they can be a real novelty,” he adds. “It can be like, ‘Oh great, Bruce Willis is dead. I don’t ever f---ing need to see that movie again (Laughs).”

“SURVIVOR BLUES,” MUTT (2011)

Branan sometimes introduces “Survivor Blues” as “my ‘Born to Run,’ except the guy and the girl in it both have pretty significant pasts, and they know that running won’t do a damn bit of good.”

The song rings with that classic Springsteen-ian rock energy, but with a scarred up rough-and-tumble core. But it’s the clever lyricism packed with vivid imagery — scenes of smoke filled bars, stolen cars, and a bonfire of an ex’s mementos — that make the tune transcend.

“I had the image of a guy and he was outside a bar, and he had T-R-U-E L-O-V-E tattooed on his knuckles, and he was just pounding his knuckles against the wall. (Laughs) It was this picture of him trying to pound his tattoos off.

“And so then I took it in the bar,” he continues. “Again, we’re working with the cliche: guy meets girl in a bar. And then you start to see that they don’t really have this big, huge, ‘Thunder Road’ hope of we’re gonna escape this.”

While it’s the prime example of Branan’s songwriting subversion, “Survivor Blues” also resonates with him on a deeply personal level. Like most of his music, it’s about pushing through the hard times without numbing yourself to reality.

“It’s just playing on a cliché. ‘What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger,’” Branan says. “And I’m like, ‘Well, it will also f---ing make you wish you died.’ It’ll make you stronger… if you f---ing live through it.

“But honestly, that’s a lot of my music. It’s kind of a thesis statement. (Laughs) It’s just trying to keep from getting jaded while not, you know, becoming a dog fetching the same goddamn stick over and over and willfully dumbing yourself into doing the same bullshit again. It’s trying to set little reminders for myself.” n Cory Branan • Fri, Oct. 29, 8 pm • $14 • 21+ • Lucky You Lounge • 1801 W Sunset Blvd • luckyyoulounge.com • 509-474-0511

OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 29

Black Sabbath

MUSIC MONSTER MASH

It’s once again time for local bands to musically cosplay as their favorites. The Baby Bar Halloween Show returns with six sets of cover band hijinks. Perhaps the most seasonally appropriate set will come via Trash Casket playing Black Sabbath songs, but the rest of the lineup will also be loaded with familiar tunes: Uh Oh and the Oh Wells take on the allure of The Doors; Baloney gets grandiose with Pink Floyd tunes; Big Raffle will go on like a blister in the sun by playing Violent Femmes songs; Matthew Hughes (of Atari Ferrari) will take on the catalog of singer-songwriter Nick Drake; and Xurs covers influential English post-punk act Wire. It’s sure to be a graveyard smash.

— SETH SOMMERFELD Baby Bar Halloween Show • Sat, Oct. 30 at 8 pm • $10 • Baby Bar • 827 W. First Ave. • 509-847-1234

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30 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

SPORTS CAN I KICK IT?

THEATER SPOOKY SHOWTUNES

The Gonzaga women’s soccer team couldn’t have hoped for a better start to their season. Before starting WCC play, the Zags kicked off the year with an 11-1 record, including wins over schools like Arizona, Georgia, and Purdue. It led to Bulldogs being ranked for the first time since 2005. But conference play has not been kind to the ladies, dropping four of their first five WCC games. It’s put the talented squad — led by senior defenders Haley Archuleta and Jordan Thompson and freshman scoring ace Maddie Kemp — up against the ropes as they try to scrap for only their second NCAA Tournament berth. The senior night game against San Francisco now feels like a must-win, which should lead to a tense atmosphere at Luger Field.

— SETH SOMMERFELD

Ready to sing your bloody heart out? Coeur d’Alene Summer Theatre is next staging a fitting Halloween-themed fundraiser, titled “A Night of Spine Tingling Music,” to help kickstart its upcoming 2022 season, set to feature productions of Mamma Mia!, Little Women and Nunsense. Join fellow Broadway lovers in singing along to famous songs from Wicked, Sweeney Todd, Phantom of the Opera, The Addams Family, Jekyll & Hyde and several other “spooky, scary” classic musicals. Plan to show up dressed in your best Halloween attire for a costume contest, and be ready to participate in the silent auction and enjoy Halloween drinks and treats all night.

— MADISON PEARSON

Gonzaga Women’s Soccer vs. San Francisco • Wed, Nov. 3 at 7 pm • $7-$10 • Luger Field at Gonzaga University • 801 N. Cincinnati St. • gozags.com • 509-313-6000

A Night of Spine Tingling Music • Sat, Oct. 30 at 7:30 pm • $60 • Archwood Hall • 618 E. Wallace Ave., Coeur d’Alene • cdasummertheatre.com/tickets • 208-660-2958

Hey Spokane!

now broadcasting with 100,000 watts and in full

VISUAL ARTS PERSONAL SPACE PLUS

Two pink squirrels smoking cigarettes and throwing dice greet visitors to Moscow’s Third Street Gallery, representing David Wilson’s interpretation of the “wild” theme in the new exhibition Sculpted Spaces, Wild Lives. Wilson’s mixed-media sculpture “Wild Life” provides a humorous entry point to the dual themes of the exhibition: How humans create and shape spaces through landscaping or architecture, but also how animals inhabit those spaces. A range of media and entry points are represented, including more abstract and conceptual works like Megan Mack’s black-and-white “tree scroll with beetle glyphs,” which reminds of tree rings scientists rely upon to tell the age of both living and man-made things, both trees and the axes that cut them down. Nowhere is climate change mentioned, but you’re welcome to go there with this exhibition, curated by University of Idaho associate professor Stacy Isenbarger.

— CARRIE SCOZZARO

Spokane’s Independent Rock Station

Sculpted Spaces, Wild Lives • Through Jan. 7, 2022; open Mon-Fri from 8 am-5 pm • Free • Third Street Gallery • 206 E. Third St., Moscow • ci.moscow.id.us/230/Third-Street-Gallery • 208-883-7036

COMMUNITY TO THE WOODS

Families looking for some festive fun this Halloween weekend can consider Camp Dart-Lo’s annual outdoor celebration, offering some good — oops, we mean ghoul — old-fashioned fun. The three-day, outdoor event packs it all in, treats included, with a haunted trail, fortune telling, costume contest and ghost stories. And there’s more! Bingo, face painting, a dart toss, marshmallow roasting, concessions and hikes. All activities take place in the peaceful (or spooky, depending on your view) wooded setting of Camp Fire’s Camp Dart-Lo facilities in Northwest Spokane. Make sure to dress for the weather, costumes included, and bring a flashlight on Friday or Saturday since it’ll be dark after 6 pm. This event is geared toward families with kids in kindergarten through sixth grade, but all ages are welcome.

— CHEY SCOTT Ghoul Ol’ Fashioned Fun • Fri, Oct. 29 from 4:30-7 pm, Sat, Oct. 30 from 3:30-7 pm and Sun, Oct. 31 from 11 am-1 pm • $5/child; adults and ages 2 and under free • Camp Dart-Lo • 14000 N. Dartford Dr. • campfireinc.org • 509-747-6191

FOR MORE INFORMATION ON HOW TO APPLY GO TO SREC911.ORG OR CALL (509) 532-8911

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OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 31

Representatives equally. Go online and sign the 28th Amendment petition. This would put an end to Congress being able to “EXEMPT” itself. If we are required to abide by the rule of law, Congress should have to do the same.

JEERS

I SAW YOU RE: WEST CENTRAL WAILING Where I commend your ability to be understanding of the toils of addiction, it’s a slippery slope. If we are not careful, Spokane will turn into an SEA, PDX, SFO. It is, in fact, NOT OK to hunker down in a neighborhood and shoot up. As you witnessed, it brings with it a whole host of other behavior that is unacceptable and should not be tolerated. I understand that this is much more nuanced and complicated than what can be captured here, but, ultimately, we have control over what happens in our neighborhoods — and THAT cannot stand.

JAYME FROM OASIS HAS MOVED Hi, everyone. This is JAYME. I used to work at Oasis. Some of my clients did not get the news that I left. I am now at SOLA SALON ON 29th.

CHEERS 28TH AMENDMENT We the people need to insist on a 28th Amendment.

Congress is completely out of control. Every law passed by Congress must apply to all citizens of the United States and to all Senators and

SOUND OFF

CATHY MCMORRIS ROGERS’ BROTHER HIRING The hiring of Cathy McMorris Rogers’ brother article in Sunday’s paper, really? It states that her position had nothing to do with his hiring, in her office, really, if she wasn’t a congresswoman would he even be considered, and he will be controlling the funds of American Rescue plan that she didn’t even vote for, this should be interesting, her brother, a former Trump employee, controlling a mostly Democratic plan.

This should be a worry for the state.

2 EXEMPTIONS NO ACCOMMODATION Washington state, it is really sad that we prefer mandates over law. I followed this process, was granted both the medical and religious exemption, but was informed there is no reasonable accommodation or alternative job assignment. They claim they searched in good faith, but truly how does one prove this happened? You can’t.

BIG “MAN” To the actual butthole in the ugly douchey truck who pulled out in front of me 10/19 on Rockwood: No matter what you think happened, it takes a big man to yell threats at a 125-pound girl and then follow her several blocks. Hope you feel good about yourself. Your license plate has been reported to the police.

TO THE SJWS It’s amazing to see the hatred towards LEOs, especially in the 14-20 October edition. To the male or female who wrote last week about his/her disgust with the LEOs

for simply standing up for their rights, shame on you. (Also you were not given a ticket simply for having an “F You Trump” sticker. Judging by your jeer and what appears to be a

“

TIN EAR This Spokane music venue has

(6) No muffler man we worry, That you’ll never grow up and Be a nuisance till I’m placed inside of a grave

We the people need ... a 28th Amendment.

Congress is completely out of control.

sad worldview you live in, you probably drive like a jerk). God bless our State Troopers who won’t bow to King Inslee’s tyranny.

NONPARTISAN? Jeers to the Spokane County voters pamphlet that describes candidates as “nonpartisan” when they are clearly partisan. A quick internet search on these candidates could prevent making the mistake of voting for those who are bent on turning Spokane into another Portland or Seattle, or bring dangerous progressive ideas into the classroom.

GLASS HOUSES To the person full of jeers for those speaking up about COVID and implying that the use of the term “Trumpt***d” is an ableist slur used only by liberals, it appears you need to be reminded that the term is a retaliatory term created in response to the “libt***d” term that is so popular with the largely uneducated conservative population. While the use of any ableist slur is inappropriate, you should understand the background of the topic before you suggest that others are uneducated.

Let’s not even get into COVID — your jeers tell us all we need to know about your knowledge of that topic.

TRASH QUEEN DRB, can I guess your costume this year? Recycling; cause

1. Visit Inlander.com/isawyou by 3 pm Monday. 2. Pick a category (I Saw You, You Saw Me, Cheers or Jeers). 3.

Provide basic info: your name and email (so we know you’re real). 4. To connect via I Saw You, provide a non-identifying email to be included with your submission — like “petals327@yahoo.com,” not “j.smith@comcast.net.”

32 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

every other day you’re trash. Jeers to you, you emotionally abusive pathological sociopath of a liar.

kept the same tin-eared, unobservant sound tech on staff forever. Why? His mix is consistently muddy, he rarely has all of the instruments turned up in the mix, he can’t be bothered to boost a solo on time. Please hire a soundman who can see the drummer play his toms and get them in the mix before the end of the show. Geez “NO MUFFLER MAN” (SUNG TO THE MELODY OF “NOWHERE MAN”) (1) He’ a no muffler man, making all the noise he can

”

(7) Doesn’t have a sense of time, Keeps that heap barely alive Driving us to suicide each day

(8) No muffler man won’t listen, to all our pleas and wishes Junk that trash and come have pancakes with me.

(9) He’s a no muffler man, Making all the noise he can

Making all my neighbors mad and me too

Making all my neighbors mad and me too

(2) Doesn’t have a job some say, ‘Cause he does this everyday

Making all my neighbors mad and me too

No muffler man, please go away and stay

Making all my neighbors mad and me too” n

(3) No muffler man please listen, We have signed a petition Leave us all some peace and quiet today (4) lead break (5) Is he blind to cars and trees, Children stay away from him No muffler man we hear you miles away

THIS WEEK'S ANSWERS A R A B D I N E D O N J E B R A W R E D E I D O L N Y U G E T A T O M P S N E E A P E X R O S A S T E M

M A O H R I L Y E C R O O L T E O S R B A G

A S N E R

L A S S O

O N S E T

S W E

O R O N L O E T

I K M I O N

A R D N O B M O R R Y E S I G N O O D N S F H A L S Y N I O T S G J O O H A L T Y O

N O A I R

T O R S O

I K N E W

A M A S S

P A L E O

P O L Y P

N H O O E W M E N

NOTE: I Saw You/Cheers & Jeers is for adults 18 or older. The Inlander reserves the right to edit or reject any posting at any time at its sole discretion and assumes no responsibility for the content.

EVENTS | CALENDAR

BENEFIT

SPOOKWALK Meet the ghosts of Browne’s Addition on a walking tour of the neighborhood. Proceeds support the Friends of Coeur d’Alene Park in Browne’s Addition. Oct. 29-31 from 6:458 pm. $20. Browne’s Addition, West Spokane. tinyurl.com/BrownesTours GHOST BALL Now in its 10th year, the Ghost Ball features live/silent auctions featuring items donated from local businesses and individuals, and is Elevation’s largest fundraising event of the year.

Funds help children with special needs access the therapy care they need to succeed. Oct. 30, 7-8:15 pm. Free to register. auction.ilfmedia.com/auction/ghostball-2021 (509-385-2116)

COMEDY

NO CLUE Join the BDT Players as they put a comedic spin on everyone’s favorite macabre guessing game. Fridays in October at 7:30 pm. $8. Blue Door Theatre, 815 W. Garland. bluedoortheatre.com SAFARI Blue Door’s version of “Whose Line,” a fast-paced improv show with a few twists and turns. Saturdays from 7:30-9 pm. $8. Blue Door Theatre, 815 W. Garland Ave. bluedoortheatre.com DUDE PERFECT This American sports and comedy group were former college roommates at Texas A&M University and rose to fame after uploading videos of themselves performing trick shots on YouTube. Nov. 4 at 7 pm. Spokane Arena, 720 W. Mallon Ave. spokanearena.com

COMMUNITY

COLVILLE CORN MAZE & PUMPKIN PATCH The Inland Northwest’s largest corn maze, plus a pumpkin patch with pumpkins and squash in all shapes and sizes. Open daily through Oct. 31; MonThu 4 pm to dusk; Fri 4-7 pm, Sat-Sun 11 am-7 pm. $7-$9. Colville Corn Maze & Pumpkin Patch, 73 Oakshott Rd. colvillecornmaze.com (509-684-6751) VIRTUAL PUMPKIN TIME PARTY A giant virtual party with the Community Library Network to show off your decorated pumpkins and costumes, and share your favorite candies. Oct. 28, 6:30-8 pm.

Free. cdalibrary.org (208-769-2315) LOUIS COMFORT TIFFANY: TREASURES FROM THE DRIEHAUS COLLECTION A celebration of the artistry and craftsmanship of the Tiffany artworks from Chicago’s distinguished Richard H. Driehaus Collection, highlighting masterworks never before presented in a comprehensive exhibition. Open Tue-Sun from 10 am-5 pm through Feb. 13. $7-$12. Northwest Museum of Arts & Culture, 2316 W. First Ave. northwestmuseum.org SCARYWOOD The theme park features five haunted attractions, nine scare zones and the chance to ride most of Silverwood’s signature rides in the dark.

Through Oct. 30; Thu from 7-11 pm, Fri-Sat from 7 pm-midnight. $40-$58.

Silverwood Theme Park, 27843 U.S. 95. scarywoodhaunt.com (208-683-3400) TERROR ON SIERRA A local haunted house featuring professional effects and costumes. Guests under age 16 should be accompanied by an adult. Open Oct. 25-

31 from 7-11 pm. $5 (cash only). Terror on Sierra, 619 E. Sierra Ave. horrormediaproductions.com (509-202-2698) GHOUL OL’ FASHIONED HALLOWEEN FUN An outdoor, family friendly Halloween event with a haunted trail, crafts, dart toss, fortune teller, costume parade contest and more. Dress warm and bring flashlights Fri/Sat. Oct. 29 from 4:30-7 pm, Oct. 30 from 3:30-7 pm and Oct. 31 from 11 am-1 pm. $5/child. Camp Dart-Lo, 14000 N. Dartford Dr. campfireinc.org SHRINERS HAUNTED HALLOWEEN DRIVE-THRU HUNT Take a drive through the El Katif Shriners’ Halloween-themed “Fez Forest.” Look for hidden items and spooky characters. Proceeds support the El Katif Shriners’ mission and programs.

Fri-Sat from 5:30-8:30 pm through Oct. 30. $10 per car. Shriners Event Center, 7217 W. Westbow Blvd. elkatif.org SPO-CANDY CRAWL Kids are invited to keep an eye out for spooky scenes all over downtown. Between Oct. 29-31, locate each scene and decipher a riddle to earn a treat-bag full of fall goodies.

Free. Riverfront Park, 507 N. Howard St. downtownspokane.org (509-625-6600) TRICK OR TREAT WITH WHITMAN COUNTY LIBRARY Various Halloween events and activities are happening at branches of the Whitman County Library: Malden and St. John have craft bags, Palouse has mask kits, Oakesdale, Garfield and Colfax are passing out candy during community events, and “Just Add Pumpkin” kits are at the Albion library.

More information at whitcolib.org.

ZOMBIE ESCAPE: SOLVE THE MYSTERY The world is gripped by a Zombie virus

pandemic, but luckily, the Zombie Institute Lab is on the cusp of a cure. Work together with your team in a race against the clock (and other teams) to find the cure and identify the culprit by solving clues and puzzles. Costumes encouraged.

For grades 6–12. Registration required.

Oct. 29, 5-6 pm and Oct. 30, 4-5 pm.

Free. Online at scld.org FALL FESTIVAL This annual event begins with a movie, followed by a carnival for the kids, a chili cook off and costume contest. Oct. 30. Cutter Theatre, 302 Park, Metaline Falls. cuttertheatre.com ROGERS HIGH SCHOOL HOLIDAY CRAFT & VENDOR FAIR New and returning vendors are on site, along with local direct sales consultants, plus concessions, for a total of more than 100 vendors. Oct. 30, 10 am-4 pm. Rogers High School, 1622 E. Wellesley. (509-995-8037) SCRAPS TRUNK OR TREAT Enjoy Halloween trick-or-treating outside in the SCRAPS parking. Includes games and prizes for best costume and decorated car. Donations appreciated. Oct. 30, 11:30 am-3 pm. Free. SCRAPS Regional Animal Shelter, 6815 E. Trent Ave. spokanecounty.org/scraps (509-418-6803) SPARK-O-WEEN Spark Central gets spo000oky for a fun-filled day of creative learning and trick-or-treating. Costumes welcome, but not required. Oct. 30, 12:30 pm. Free. Spark Central, 1214 W. Summit Pkwy. spark-central.org/events THE ROXIE PRESENTS: HAUNTED HALLOWS EVE! A night of haunted events, including 32,000 square feet of vendors, dancing, card readers and more. Oct. 30, 8 pm. $10. The Roxie, 5201 N. Market.

theroxiespokane.com CAMPBELL HOUSE HALLOWEEN Tour the Campbell House at night, complete a scavenger hunt and create and take home a Halloween project. Buy tickets online or at the door to the Campbell House. Oct. 31, 5-8 pm. $5 (ages 3 and under free). Northwest Museum of Arts & Culture, 2316 W. First Ave. northwestmuseum.org SPOKANE PUMPKIN HOUSE DISPLAY Organizers of this 4th annual event expect to beat their 2020 record of 260 carved and lit pumpkins on display. Oct. 31, 5 pm. Free. Spokane Pumpkin House, 4315 W. Rowan Ave. (206-910-7938) TRICK-OR-TREAT & HAUNTED HALLWAY A free, safe and indoor Halloween event with trick-or-treating, games, activities, a “haunted” hallway and more.

Oct. 31, 4-7 pm. Free. Southside Community Center, 3151 E. 27th Ave. southsidescc.org (509-535-0803) TRUNK-OR-TREAT AT SILVER Come dressed in your best costume and bring a bag for candy. Held in the Silver Mt. parking lot. Oct. 31, 6-7 pm. Free. Silver Mountain Resort, 610 Bunker Ave. silvermt.com THOMAS BERRY’S VISION FOR THE EARTH COMMUNITY Berry was a historian of western and Asian cultures who created a unique history of religions program at Fordham University. From this perspective he offered a comprehensive context for revisioning education in a time of ecological and climate challenges. Nov. 3, 4 pm. Free. gonzaga.edu/ center-for-climate-society-environment/ events (719-464-5555)

OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 33

EVENTS | CALENDAR

FILM

Holiday Editions NOVEMBER 26-DECEM

BER 2, 2020 | HAPPY

Holiday Guide

COLLEGE LL TBA BASKE ARE STARTING THE

HOLIDAYS!

THE ZAGS NO. 1 PAGE 18 SEASON RANKED

CONTACT TRACINTOGCONTAIN

WHY IT’S FAILEDCOVID PAGE 16 THE SPREAD OF

ON STANDS NOV. 24TH

SUPPLEMENT TO THE

BAN THE PLASTIC BAGS

BAG

20 COMING? PAGE

ING RCHPAGE 69 SEA UL H’S ALLEN STONE SO OF CHEWELA THE RETURN

IS THE END OF

Gift

DECEMBER 6-12, 2018

| IT’S SHOP LOCAL

SEASON!

Guide DECEMBER 3-9, 2020

Gift Guides TIME MER DECISIONS, HAMLAWYERS MAKE COURT TRAINED PAGE 13 RIGHT? NOT ALWAYS

THERE’S AN T THA FOR NEW APPCING WASHINGTON’S INTRODU APP PAGE 16 COVID-TRACING

| LET’S SHOP LOCAL

THIS YEAR!

for ideasyone ! ever ur list on yo 24 PAGEEMENT TO

SUPPL DER THE INLAN

INLANDER

Everything you need to know to survive and thrive through the season!

PA GE

24

ON STANDS DEC. 2ND & 9TH Gift ideas for everyone on your list!

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DRIVE-IN MOVIE NIGHTS The HUB hosts a series of fall outdoor drive-in movies, next up is a double-feature of Hocus Pocus and Carrie. Oct. 30, 7-11 pm. $20/car. HUB Sports Center, 19619 E. Cataldo Ave. hubsportscenter.org TRIVIA: TIM BURTON MOVIES Learn and compete to see who knows the most fun facts about Tim Burton’s iconic movies. Registration required. Oct. 30, 2 pm. Free. Online; scld.org UNITED BY WATER In conjunction with the exhibit “Awakenings” are regular screenings of the documentary “United

by Water” created by the Upper Columbia Unified Tribes. The film follows the first tribal canoe journey and gathering at Kettle Falls since the Ceremony of Tears in 1943. Saturdays at 1 pm; first and third Wednesdays at noon. Included with admission. Northwest Museum of Arts & Culture, 2316 W. First Ave. northwestmuseum.org (509-456-3931) WARREN MILLER’S WINTER STARTS NOW This year’s film takes viewers across the U.S. to breathtaking vistas of the Rocky Mountains, Sun Valley, Tahoe and peaks in Maine all the way to Alaska, including footage of the first disabled ski descent of Denali. Oct. 30, 4 & 7 pm. $19-$22. Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague. bingcrosbytheater.com

FOOD

WAKE UP CALL: NORTH PINES GRAND OPENING The celebration features a number of Wake Up Call vendors and giveaways. Oct. 28, 7 am-7 pm. Free. Wake Up Call Coffee, 1106 N. Pines Rd. wuc.red (509-924-7202) PIE + PINTS POP-UP Bean & Pie is popping up at Lumberbeard. Enjoy a rotating assortment of sweet and savory pies each week, alongside beer. Oct. 29, 5-8 pm. Lumberbeard Brewing, 25 E. Third Ave. beanandpie.com MOONLIGHT HALLOWEEN CRUISE This year’s adult-only cruises include Halloween décor, a DJ, photo contest, Halloween cocktails and more. Oct. 30 at 5 and 8 pm. $25. The Coeur d’Alene Resort, 115 S. Second. cdacruises.com SUDS & SCIENCE SEMINAR SERIES Dr. Javier Ochoa-Reparaz, PhD Associate Professor of Biology at EWU, presents “Bugs, gut, and brain: an intricate relationship.” In this session, learn more about the complex interactions between gut microbes, immune cells and the brain in the context of MS. Oct. 30, 7-8 pm. Free. The Golden Handle Project, 111 S. Cedar St. goldenhandle.org DAY OF THE DEAD TASTING MENU Honoring Dia de los Muertos, a traditional Mexican holiday celebrating passed loved ones, the Lodgepole team is serving some of their family’s most heartfelt cooking techniques alongside seasonal Pacific Northwest ingredients.

Tickets include six-course dinner and wine pairings. Nov. 1, 5:30-8 pm. $125.

Lodgepole, 106 N. Main St., Moscow. lodgepolerestaurant.com

MUSIC

JAZZ COMBO SERIES The WSU jazz combo program presents several concerts in Pullman, featuring original student and faculty compositions along with the music of Benny Golson, Duke Pearson, and John McLaughlin. Schedule as follows: Rico’s Public House on

Oct. 28 and Nov. 4 at 8:30 pm; Kimbrough Concert Hall on Nov. 9 at 7:30 pm. Free and open to the public. events. wsu.edu/event/jazz-forum-16/ OKTUBAFEST PART III: TUBA-EUPHONIUM STUDIO RECITAL To close this fall’s Oktubafest at WSU, members of the tuba-euphonium studio perform a variety of solos, duets and other chamber music. Oct. 28, 7:30-9 pm.

Free. Bryan Hall Theatre (WSU), 605 Veterans Way. (509-335-7696) WHITWORTH SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA HALLOWEEN CONCERT A Halloween concert in the HUB also livestreamed on the music department’s YouTube channel. Oct. 28, 5 pm.

Free. Whitworth Hixson Union Building, 300 W. Hawthorne Rd. youtube.com/ whitworthuniversitymusicdepartment OKAIDJA AFROSO Okaidja is an Afropop singer-songwriter and multi-instrumentalist from Ghana, West Africa.

His sound is a fusion of Ghanaian music with diverse cross-cultural influences.

Oct. 29, 7:30 pm. $22. Panida Theater, 300 N. First Ave. panida.org THE BLACK JACKET SYPMPHONY PRESENTS: LED ZEPPELIN IV All tickets purchased for Oct. 31, 2020 show are valid for this rescheduled performance. Oct. 31, 8 pm. $25-$32.50.

Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague. bingcrosbytheater.com AKROPOLIS REED QUINTET The WSU School of Music hosts the nationallyrecognized Akropolis Quintet in concert. Hailed for their “imagination, infallible musicality and huge vitality” (Fanfare Magazine), the quintet takes listeners on extraordinary musical adventures. Nov. 1, 7:30-9 pm. Free. Bryan Hall Theatre (WSU), 605 Veterans Way. events.wsu.edu/event/akropolis-reedquintet-in-concert/ (509-335-7696)

SPORTS & OUTDOORS

SPOKANE CHIEFS Regular season match vs. the Victoria Royals on Oct. 29, 7 pm. Then against the Everett Silvertips on Oct. 30, 7 pm, with the promo special of Coeur d’Alene Casino night. $17-$37. Spokane Arena, 720 W. Mallon Ave. spokanechiefs.com HALLOWEEN HUSTLE HAUNTED HALF Show off your costume as you make your way through the haunted course.

Includes candy at each aid station. Oct. 31. $40-$85. Coeur d’Alene. runsignup. com/Race/Register?raceId=115467

THEATER

INTO THE WOODS Theater at the Lake’s 2021-22 season opener, directed

by Domique Betts. The story follows a baker and his wife who wish to have a child; Cinderella, who wishes to attend the King’s Festival; and Jack, who wishes his cow would give milk. Oct. 21-31; Thu-Sat at 7 pm, Sat at 3 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $15 ($13 for military, students, seniors). TAC at the Lake, 22910 E. Appleway Ave. tacatthelake.com INLAND NORTHWEST OPERA: ORPHEUS AND EURYDICE The ancient legend of Orpheus and Eurydice is brought to life through Christoph Willibald Gluck’s score in this all-new production. ​Fully orchestrated and staged; sung in Italian with English supertitles.

Oct. 29 at 7:30 pm, Oct. 31 at 3 pm. Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox, 1001 W.

Sprague Ave. foxtheaterspokane.com OUT OF THE SHADOWS THEATER: BYE BYE BIRDIE Out of the Shadows is a company for actors with disabilities to experience and excel in authentic musical theater productions. Oct. 29-30 and Nov. 4-5 at 7;30 pm; Oct. 31 at 2 pm. $10-$14. Kroc, 1765 W. Golf Course Rd. outoftheshadowstheater.com THIS RANDOM WORLD From an ailing woman who plans one final trip, to her daughter planning one great escape and her son falling prey to a prank gone wrong, this funny, intimate and heartbreaking play explores the lives that may be happening just out of reach of our own. Oct. 28-30 at 7:30 pm. Free.

Schuler Performing Arts Center, 1000 W. Garden Ave. nic.edu (208-769-7780) A NIGHT OF SPINE-TINGLING MUSIC: A HALLOWEEN FUNDRAISER Wicked + Phantom of the Opera + Sweeney Todd are all a little bit spooky, a little bit scary and Coeur d’Alene Summer Theater is performing featured songs from all at its fall performance and fundraiser. Oct. 30, 7:30 pm. $60. Archwood Hall, 618 E. Wallace Ave. app.artspeople.com/index.php?show=130545 SPOOKY STORIES Stage Left Theater presents Paul J Watts’ “Spooky Stories,” a collection of short films to thrill and chill. Oct. 30, 7-9 pm. Free at vimeo.com/stagelefttheater

VISUAL ARTS

BRAINSTORMING: AN INTELLECTUAL SPORT BY LEN DAVIS California based artist Len Davis exhibits a series of assemblages, collages, drawings and paintings which dive into the practice of brainstorming itself. Oct. 25-Nov. 23; open daily 8:30 am-3:30 pm.

Free. SFCC Fine Arts Gallery, 3410 W. Whistalks Way, Bldg. 6. spokanefalls. edu/gallery (509-533-3746) EWU FACULTY EXHIBITION Artwork produced by EWU’s Art Faculty in an array of artistic styles and media, including painting, sculpture, printmaking, ceramics, photography, video and digital art. Through Nov. 4; Mon-Fri 9 am-5 pm. Free. EWU Gallery of Art, 140 Art Building. ewu.edu/cahss/fineperforming-arts/art/gallery HER WORDS TO LIFE: A CELEBRATION OF BLACK WOMEN’S VOICES Spokane artists Shantell Jackson and Tracy Poindexter-Canton exhibit a collection of visual art inspired by the poetry and/or literary prose of Black women writers, Audre Lorde, Nikki Giovanni, Ntozake Shange, Alice Walker and Toni Morrison. Through Oct. 30, open Thu-Sat from 6-8 pm. Free. Terrain Gallery, 304 W. Pacific Ave. terrainspokane.com

WORDS

POET JERICHO BROWN Pulitzer Prize recipient Jericho Brown reads for a free, public event hosted by the Gonzaga University Visiting Writers Series and Powers Chair of the Humanities. The event will also be available for streaming at gonzaga.edu/streaming. Nov. 3, 7:30 pm. Free. Gonzaga Hemmingson Center, 702 E. Desmet Ave. gonzaga. edu (509-313-6942) 3 MINUTE MIC Spokane’s long-running first Friday poetry open mic, returns to Auntie’s live and in-person. Readers can share up to three minutes’ worth of poetry. Nov. 5, 7 pm. Free. Auntie’s, 402 W. Main Ave. auntiesbooks.com

Luxembourg makes a move decriminalizing cannabis.

EUROPE

Luxembourg Goes Green

Cannabis legalization is coming to one very small part of the European Union

BY WILL MAUPIN

M

ove over, Amsterdam. Europe’s got a new capital of cannabis.

On Oct. 22, the government of Luxembourg announced a plan to legalize the possession and home production of cannabis for recreational use by people 18 and older. Luxembourg, wedged between France, Germany and Belgium, is the second-smallest country in the European Union by both population and land area.

Despite its small stature, the country’s announcement is a big deal for cannabis in Europe as it will become the first country on the continent to legalize cannabis for recreational use. ...continued on page 38

OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 35

GREEN ZONE

BE AWARE: Marijuana is legal for adults 21 and older under Washington State law (e.g., RCW 69.50, RCW 69.51A, HB0001 Initiative 502 and Senate Bill 5052). State law does not preempt federal law; possessing, using, distributing and selling marijuana remains illegal under federal law. In Washington state, consuming marijuana in public, driving while under the influence of marijuana and transporting marijuana across state lines are all illegal. Marijuana has intoxicating effects; there may be health risks associated with its consumption, and it may be habit-forming. It can also impair concentration, coordination and judgment. Do not operate a vehicle or machinery under the influence of this drug. Keep out of reach of children. For more information, consult the Washington State Liquor and Cannabis Board at www.liq.wa.gov.

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OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 37

GREEN ZONE

NOTE TO READERS Be aware of the differences in the law between Idaho and Washington. It is illegal to possess, sell or transport cannabis in the State of Idaho.

Possessing up to an ounce is a misdemeanor and can get you a year in jail and up to a $1,000 fine; more than three ounces is a felony that can carry a five-year sentence and fine of up to $10,000. Transporting marijuana across state lines, like from Washington into Idaho, is a felony under federal law.

EUROPE “LUXEMBOURG GOES GREEN,” CONTINUED...

Under the proposal, adults in Luxembourg will be allowed to grow up to four plants on their property and possess up to three grams of cannabis for personal use. Public possession will remain illegal, but it will be a civil offense rather than criminal and punishable by fine. The proposal will not open up a legal marketplace for cannabis in the country. The impetus behind the action is to encourage people to move away from black market cannabis sources.

“We want to do everything we can to get more and more away from the illegal black market.”

“We thought we had to act, we have an issue with drugs, and cannabis is the drug that is most used and is a large part of the illegal market,” Justice Minister Sam Tanson told the Guardian.

“We want to start by allowing people to grow it at home. The idea is that a consumer is not in an illegal situation if he consumes cannabis and that we don’t support the whole illegal chain from production to transportation to selling where there is a lot of misery attached. We want to do everything we can to get more and more away from the illegal black market.”

Luxembourg’s proposal puts it in line with a handful of other countries that have stopped short of fully legalizing cannabis.

In 2018 the Constitutional Court of Georgia ruled that possession and consumption of cannabis was not illegal if done in private.

That same year the highest court in South Africa made a similar ruling. Earlier this year, Mexico’s supreme court ruled that way as well; however, it required citizens to apply for permits in order to legally possess cannabis.

Uruguay became the first country to fully legalize cannabis in 2013, not long after Washington and Colorado became the first U.S. states to do so. Canada followed suit in 2018, legalizing possession and consumption and opening a legal marketplace for sale of cannabis. n

38 INLANDER OCTOBER 28, 2021

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My boyfriend asked me for nude photos of myself. I reluctantly sent him one. I feel very uncomfortable about sending it, and I don’t want to send more — though sending naked pics now seems very common.

Am I paranoid? —Online Privacy Fan

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Unfortunately, “online privacy” is one of the more absurdo oxymorons — a contradiction in terms on the level of “planned spontaneity,” “working vacation,” and my favorite: “civil war.” (The warring factions yell AMY ALKON “Thank you!” and “No, thank you!” across the trenches until more people pass out on one side than the other.)

Digital-world technology has made our lives vastly easier, more efficient, and more fun, but it can also cost us big-time — on a scale previously unseen and even unimaginable throughout human history. Back in the Middle Ages, no one had to worry about some brainy malcontent hacking their “cloud” and releasing all their nudie shots to the Global Village. At worst, one other person might come upon a lone sketch of them in a state of undress or maybe a few slutty etchings.

In other words, you are far from unreasonable to say no to sending any further nudiepix, and it would not be unreasonable to ask your boyfriend to delete the one you sent him (explaining your privacy concerns). That said, he might find that request unreasonable, vis-a-vis how common it is for people to sext those they’re dating — or (when those people are guys) show random strangers on the internet their erect willy.

If he does find it unreasonable, you might feel bad saying no. Women, much more than men, tend to be on the high end of the spectrum of the personality trait “agreeableness” (first identified in the 1930s by psychologists Gordon Allport and Henry Odbert). High agreeableness manifests in a “pleaser” personality: being kind, empathetic, cooperative, and driven to have positive interactions with others (often to one’s own detriment).

Understanding that you might have a predisposition to say yes can help you stand up for yourself. At first, announcing your boundaries — saying no — will likely feel bad. Be prepared to override that feeling and act in your best interest.

Sure, many people share all sorts of naked ’n’ crazy without having it exposed to the universe, but there’s always that possibility. At a work retreat, your coworkers should not try to bond with you with: “Don’t you find the Cool Whip requires too much cleanup?”

MUTE POINT

I’m a guy in my early 20s. I love my older brother and look up to him. But starting in high school, girls flocked to him, and he was crowned prom king, though I’m objectively more attractive. Recently, a girl I really liked and became friends with started dating him after I introduced them at a party. Neither knew about my feelings for her because I never told them, but I now feel resentful and envious of my brother. —Bitter Ideally, if a woman is asked to guess your “spirit animal,” her answer won’t be, “Hamster lying cold and dead in the corner of his cage?”

Your “I feel resentful” is a bit entitled snowflake, since you never did anything to let this woman know you were interested. In short: Good things come to those who ask. (Full disclosure: often, though not always.)

As for your envy, research by evolutionary psychologist Bram Buunk overturns the bad name this emotion has long gotten. Envy is actually adaptive — functional — and its function appears to be making us go: “Whoa! He’s way ahead of me! Gotta put on my lady-chasing track shoes!” Envy is only a destructive emotion when people experiencing it engage in “malicious envy”: trying to sabotage those doing better than they are rather than trying to up their own game and outdo them fair and square.

In the future, when you want a woman, don’t silently watch as she wanders off into another guy’s arms. Say something! As I noted, it won’t always end well when you hit on a woman, but possibly getting rejected is the cost of possibly having dates, sex, and love.

That said, there’s a way to repurpose bummerino brush-offs into “small wins”: organizational psychologist Karl Weick’s term for small positive outcomes experienced while failing to solve a big (or even massive) problem. An example of how that might play out in your head: “Okay, that girl I hit on at the bar was nasty, but yesterday, I would’ve spent all night just staring at her. Today, I grew a pair and approached her. Yay, me!”

Though this is admittedly the slow, emotionally grubby approach, you should find it much more effective than your current MO: waiting for a woman you’re into to read your mind and have herself shot out of a cannon through your open window and into your love pit/bed. n

©2021, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. • Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave, #280, Santa Monica, CA 90405 or email AdviceAmy@aol.com (www.advicegoddess.com)

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ACROSS 1. Kaffiyeh wearer 5. Zayn formerly of One Direction 10. Prefix with knock or lock 14. Eat stylishly 15. “Same here” 16. Starting piece on a1 or h8, say 17. *”Miami Vice” star 19. “Phooey!”

20. Natives for whom a Great Lake is named 21. Cacophony 22. What a bouncer might bust up 25. *”Northern Exposure” star 28. Unwanted photo effect 30. Choices at bakeries and liquor stores 31. Person you stan for 32. Help to secure a loan, maybe 35. Grindr, e.g.

38. Where Ross taught paleontology on “Friends,” for short 39. *Rolling Stones guitarist

40. Leader namechecked in the Beatles’ “Revolution” 41. Understand 42. “Full House” twins 43. Skating flub 44. Suit to ____ 45. Singer whose birth name, Ashley, is an anagram of her stage name 47. *”Newhart” actor 52. Online admin 53. Curled-lip expression 54. Hilarious folks 56. Zenith 57. *First Korean to win an Oscar for Best Director 62. “Brooklyn Nine-Nine” detective Diaz 63. Welcome in Waikiki 64. Big name in theaters 65. Part of a cherry you don’t eat 66. Eponymous California museum

founder 67. Prophetic sign ... or a two-word description of the answers to the five starred clues?

Down 1. Do sum work 2. Setting for Hitchcock’s “Notorious” that, coincidentally, can be found in the word “notorious” 3. ____ Taylor (fashion chain) 4. Make sparkle, in a way 5. Hawaiian for “strong,” which, when doubled, means “very strong” 6. Ed of “Elf” 7. “Ted ____” (Apple TV+ comedy) 8. Texter’s “As I see it ...”

9. Blood, so to speak 10. Passions 11. Tiring problem for bicyclists?

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33. Inception 34. Fin. neighbor 35. Stockpile 40 36. “Caveman” diet 37. Coral component 43 39. Chopper blade 43. Go it alone 45 46 44. Test worth coll. credit 46. Concerning 52 50 51 47. Rulers before the Bolsheviks 54 55 48. High, in a way 49. 1980s U.S. attorney 58 59 60 61 general 50. “... unless I’m wrong” 64 51. “Sweet dreams” 67 55. Any singer of the 1973 #1 hit “Love Train” “OMEN” 57. Sack 23. Return to brunette, say 58. Cheer for Real Madrid 24. Tennis score after deuce, maybe 59. ____ de plume 26. “Blade Runner” actor ____ James 60. ____-haw 27. “Holy moly!”

61. Take responsibility for 29. Places to study anglais, perhaps 33

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OCTOBER 28, 2021 INLANDER 39

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