The Quibbler Winter 2019

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Editor-In-Chief & Divination Dept Head Starflashfairy Gryffindor Managing Editor -MrJHufflepuff Managing Editor & Classifieds Dept Head L-ily Ravenclaw Managing Editor Eldis_ Slytherin Managing Editor Im_Finally_Free Production Manager KackelDackel Production Assistants elpbit Quibbler_editor forwardtotimepast Mathy16 thealtoid Web-Wizard Oomps62 Archives wiksry Payroll Marx0r Art Dept Head PastelPurrfect Castles & Burrows Dept Head blxckfire

Classifieds L-ily Crafts, Brews, & Hobbies Dept Head Mathias_Greyjoy Dark Arts Dept Head Rackik Education Dept Head Starboost3 Entertainment Dept Head RGCFrostbite Fashion Dept Head midnightdragon Magical Plants & Creatures Dept Head Ryan814 News & Features Dept Head Rysler Sports Dept Head ElphabaPfenix Travel Dept Head mrsvanchamarch

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ytodpdjebaotjeo The Editors Deskq

k s e D ’s r o t i d E e h T From arflash the Desk of Madam St Greetings, Dear Reader

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ve e Quibbler! I can’t belie Th of on iti ed th ten e Welcome to th spite our ups ’re still going strong. De we t bu , far is th it e ad we’ve m ed possible. ed things I never dream ev hi ac ’ve we s, wn do d an utors who nderful staff and contrib wo e th of all k an th to team I wish ible and the production ss po ue iss is th e ad m have ul. Great job, ever yone! that has made it beautif / e moderation team of /r I’d also like to thank th point increase! We went harrypotter for the huge ndred points an issue to from giving out seven hu th, which is a truly wona thousand points a mon able to give a “salary” to en be e e’v W g. in th l rfu de cool. embers, which is really our editors and staff m eat and we love you! You mods are doing gr enjoyed crethis issue as much as we g in ad re joy en all e u yo I hope /r/TheQuibbler for mor to e ib cr bs su to re su ating it for you. Be Quibbler fun! May Fortune smile upon ~Madam Starflash Editor-in-Chief

you!

Madam Starflash


THE QUIBBLER: NO. 34854 JANUARY 2019 THIS ISSUE OF THE QUIBBLER WAS CREATED, WRITTEN, PRODUCED AND REVIEWED BY THE HOGWARTS STAFF AT /R/THEQUIBBLER. THIS ISSUE FEATURES ARTICLES THAT EXPOSE THE TRUTH. SELLING OVER 1,500,000 COPIES WITH OVER 29,000 DIFFERENT ISSUES, WE ARE THE WIZARDING WORLD’S ALTERNATIVE VOICE AND REASON SINCE 1989. WE THANK YOU FOR READING AND PURCHASING OUR SMALL INDEPENDENT NEWS MAGAZINE

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Welcome to OUR BRAND NEW issue of the Quibbler. Below is an overview of everything you can find in this All new edition of the Quibbler! We hope you find the experience Both enlightening and entertaining! THE BIGGEST STORIES FROM THE

FRONTPAGE:

08 Silver Spells: The Protectors' Protectors 14 A Visit to the Wizarding Spa 52 Famous Squib, Stan Lee, Dies Excelsior

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

Fantastic Baths and Where to Find Them

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BREAKING NEWS:

jfjsdjwfksfkljklwenjkfnzwdiewghiorndgknakflenifnsdnakhwroiuwehdnmd, News And Features. ................................ 05

Crafts, Brews, And Hobbies.................... 64

Travel....................................................... 25

Horror-Scopes......................................... 68

Magical Plants And Creatures. ............. 30

Classifieds................................................ 69

Divination................................................ 36

Auror Logs...............................................70

Entertainment. ....................................... 46

Credits......................................................72

Education. ............................................... 58 Fashion..................................................... 63

STAFF:

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Editor-In-Chief: Starflashfairy Managing Editors: Im_Finally_Free, L-ily, -MrJ-, Eldis_ Administration: Marx0r, Oomps62, Wiksry Layout and Design: Mathy16, KackelDackel, Elpbit, Quibbler_Editor, Forwardtotimepast Art: Pastelpurrfect Castles & Burrows: blxckfire Classifieds: L-ily Crafts, Brews, & Hobbies: Mathias_ Greyjoy Dark Arts: Rackik Divination: Starflashfairy Education: Starboost3 Entertainment: RGCFrostbite Fashion: MidnightDragon Magical Plants & Creatures: Ryan814 News & Features: Rysler Sports: ElphabaPfenix Travel: mrsvanchamarch Contributors: Armyprivateoctopus99, AWandMaker, Blxckfire, BottleOfAlkahest, CherokeePurple, Clorpt, DarkBlonde4, DeerGreenwood, DullRepresentative5, Eldis_, ElphabaPfenix, Emilyolivia33, GreenFrogs95, Imprimis5, KackelDackel, L-ily, Macallion, Nellethiell, NyanSnake, Pastelpurrfect, RealisticAppeal, Res30stupid, Rhia1, Silvertail8, Starflashfairy, Theymightbehalfgiant, Tikkupulla, WDSPC, Wiksry, WillMoff, WitchUnicorn

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Ollivander's Hunt

by Rhia1

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arrick Ollivander, the owner of Ollivander’s Wand Shop in Diagon Alley, is famous among the Wizarding Community. When asked about his shop after the Battle, he expressed that he and his son would like to reopen the shop but the lack of wands disturbed him. Having passes is love of wand making to his, Ollivander was proud of his son for stepping up and saving as many wands as possible, but there was not enough for the coming years. The shop was reopened shortly, making witches and wizards rejoice. Since the Battle of Hogwarts, many wizards who fought found that their wands were damaged or destroyed. Naturally, they went to

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Ollivander, who has since worked hard to make new wands and fix others. “Repairing the wands were not simple,” Ollivander said. “It takes a great deal of time, and doesn’t always work. Depending on the amount of damage, I easily determined if there was a chance in repairing the wand successfully or not.” One of the survivors said that he felt lost without his wand always nearby. He told this reporter that it had taken several months to have his wand repaired, stating that there were several cracks. “But [Ollivander] not only repaired it, but it performed


INSERT QUIBBLER better than ever before!” Of course, no one doubted that any wand taken to Ollivander’s would be anything less than perfect. “Thought, there are some wands even I can’t repair,” said Ollivander. “If the cracks are too numerous or large, or the wand has been snapped, I can’t fix the wand. Not only that, but the essence of the wand has been lost. The only thing [the witch or wizard] can do is get a new wand.” However, due to what he endured before the battle took place, Ollivander and his son teamed up to run the shop. His son has not only stepped up with same care for wand making as his father, but also took up tasks that triggered memories of his father’s unfortunate treatment. The younger Ollivander said, “It has been difficult for my father, but his love of wands has helped in ways no doctor ever could, wizard or otherwise. And our devotion of the craft will, no doubt, continue to aid him.” When asked about what he is up to now that all repairs were finished, the elder Ollivander said, “I

have learned of a new kind of core that some other wandmakers are experimenting with. It seems that Thestral Hair cores have unique properties that Unicorn, Dragon, and Phoenix cores. Whether this is just another fad, I cannot say. I also have yet to see what these wands can do, what properties they possess, or how they react.” Upon researching this, it seems that Thestral Hair has indeed become popular. The reason being the difficulty of finding the creatures if you have not been touched by death, as well as gaining the hair after one is found. The younger Ollivander said, “I believe this is just another fad after hearing that many of the famous witches and wizards that helped Harry Potter in the [Battle of Hogwarts] were able to see them. Though, my father and I agree that such things lessen the wands potential, we are not above testing this to learn if it is viable to use as a core.” Right now, no one knows what will come from their hunt for this new core, but the world waits to hear what they will discover.

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Famous Squib, Stan Lee, Dies by Rhia1

J

ust because someone doesn’t have the ability to use magic doesn’t mean they can’t do amazing things. One such example is Stan Lee, a comic book artist and famous Squib that was recently lost to us, who has proven that the quill is mightier than the wand. Stan Lee was born Stanley Martin Lieber, son of Celia Lieber (muggle) and Jack Lieber (Romanian wizard). Because Lee was born unable to use magic, Jack didn’t have to tell his wife about the magical world. Jack worked as a dress cutter after moving to America, but had little work during the Great Depression. In order to appear as Muggle as possible, Jack rarely used magic and sent his son’s, Stan and Larry, to muggle school. However, when Stan started talking about seeing strange things, he told an 11-year-old Stan about the wizarding world. The world his father lived in and many Muggle movies starring Errol Flynn inspired Stan to create some amazing comic books and characters. It is unknown if Stan was jealous of Larry for attending Ilvermorny, but does not appear to be so. Muggles and Muggle-borns alike have loved and been inspired by the heroes Stan created. Many have called him magical just because of the heroes that inspired them and the villains they rallied against. While several characters were created by him, below are some of the more well known: Pixie - hero - A member of the X-Men who looks like a Pixie Scarlet Witch - hero - Member of the Avengers Phoenix (Jean Grey) - hero/villain - name comes from the legendary Phoenix, but she loses control of her powers at one point and becomes the Dark Phoenix

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Doctor Strange - hero - Known as the Sorcerer Supreme, similar to a very skilled wizard Abomination - villain - looks similar to a ghoul or troll Enforcers - villains - Death Eaters could have been the inspiration as the comic that this group first appeared in was first published a few years before the first Wizarding War, but their influence was still known Any hero or villain with an animal inspired name - while they don’t look like the creature they are named after completely, they share many characteristics The exception to this is Unicorn, who looks absolutely nothing like a Unicorn but shoots a high intensity beam of light from a “horn” on his helmet And several more heroes and villains that can’t be placed here Stan Lee died on November 12, 2018 in Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, a Muggle hospital, in Los Angeles, California, at age 95. It was well known that Lee suffered from pneumonia, which may have led to his death. Lee is survived by his daughter, Joan Celia "J. C." Lee, and her son. Joan herself does not magic, and it is unknown if her son does. However, we do know that while Stan Lee did not have a wand to use magic, his quill… pen, did. Muggles and Muggle-borns will never forget this amazing man and he is greatly missed. This article was sponsored by the S.S.S. (Society for the Support of Squibs)


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Mystery of the Dying Christmas Tree by ElphabaPfenix

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NEWS AND FEATURES QUIBBLER It's is close to the holidays. I should be at home, preparing for the holiday meals, doing my Christmas shopping, dusting the guest room for my visiting parents. I can just imagine my husband hugging me from behind as I cook the gravy, peals of children laughter ringing through the house. Apparently the smell of sage, cinnamon and pinecones are supposed to be the smell of Thanksgiving and Christmas. Instead I find myself on yet another assignment. This time, I walk in to the sleepy village of This-Knee. I'm not even kidding. It's not That-Knee, or even Those-Knees. The village is literally called This-Knee. I feel conspicuous in my sandycoloured trench coat and yellow umbrella. All eyes turned to me. I guess visitors are not a common occurrence in this village. I waltzed straight to the center on the village where I was greeted by the village head, standing under a huge withered Christmas Pine Tree. I mean HUGE. It was a sight to behold, even though the tree looks dry and dead. I can only imagine what it looked like in its full glory. “Mayor Burbank, what a pleasure. It's is rare for me to be invited to investigate a mystery. I usually have to sneak around under watchful, disapproving eyes. How can I be of service?” “Elphaba, let's get right to business. Every year on Christmas Eve, our little village holds a celebration. We throw a feast right here in the village square. Everyone brings a little bit of food for all to share and we drink and dance and generally be

merry. But for the last 5 years, the tree has mysteriously started to fade into a shadow of its former self. We can't figure out why. We need you to investigate.” From what I have gathered, ThisKnee was built around this tree. The history and culture is deeply rooted around this magnificent tree. The last 5 celebration were saddening affairs as they watched their tree slowly die. With a steel resolve to help this village save their holiday, I started my investigation. My first step? Finding out if anyone had any reasons to want to harm the tree. There was tree, I mean, three suspects. Suspect number 1, a witch living alone at the edge of the woods. I paid her a visit that night. Regina Gorge, an orphan, was the village beauty in her youth. The queen bee. She was the most popular witch in the village. She was dating the dashing blacksmith of the village. They were the perfect couple. Unfortunately, when she turned 22, she had her heart broken by her true love. By that time, Regina had alienated all her friends while she was with the blacksmith. Left jaded and alone, Regina swore to never love again. Rumor has it, she cursed the entire village, to lose what they hold dear in their heart so that they can feel the pain as she had. That was 6 years ago. The timing matched. The tree held a special place in their hearts. Of course, killing the tree would make the villagers understand the feeling of loss. I knocked on her door. No

answer. Cautiously, I opened the door and stepped in. Nothing could prepare me for what I saw. A statue of Regina, crouching by the fireplace, a face filled with anguish and loneliness, hugging her chest as if there's a hole where her heart should be. In front of her a spell. 'To Protecc the Heart from Attacc of Loss and Painn: To Harden the Heart in to Stone’. I guess the spell went wrong. The place was in ruins. I asked around and no one saw her for 6 years. I guess no one cared enough about her to check on her all these years. If Regina turned herself in to stone six years ago, then she couldn't have harmed the tree. As much as I wish I could help her, I was nowhere near powerful enough to break the spell. Reluctantly, I moved on to suspect number 2. Grimhilde was the epitome of jealousy. She was a real beauty in her heydays, but as Regina grew up, Grimhilde was dethroned as the village beauty. The loss of her popularity might just be enough to plot a revenge to punish the town. Six years ago, Grimhilde disappeared without a trace, leaving behind her only son, the blacksmith, suspect number 3. I had to pay the blacksmith a visit. Otto had the physique of a bodybuilder. His charming smile could entice a bird down from a tree. The villagers were in love with him. No one knows why Otto broke up with Regina. But after their break up, Otto became a serial dater. None of his relationship lasted more than a week. When asked about him, the 11


QUIBBLER NEWS AND FEATURES village summed him up in tree, I mean, three words, 'He a dawg!’ Eventually he winded up as a recluse. Other than doing metal work for the villagers, he mainly kept to himself. He was the least probable suspect but since the breakup, he had never turned up for the celebration. Not even once. He had the least attachment to the tree. Of it wasn't him, I could think of no other suspects, barring outside influences. Otto was a hard man to talk to. The strain of being alone took its toll on him. Haggard. That is the word I would describe him. It's plain to see the lack of love in his life was chipping him away, reducing him to a shell. It was an eerie parallel to the tree. I sat with him in silence. Prompting him to speak. I shared the many heart warming stories the villagers told me about the tree and how it enriched their lives. Many love stories began at the tree. The tree gave them strength, hope and safety. Eventually Otto broke. He poured his heart out. His mother, jealous of Regina, made him break up with her. Grimhilde was the one who poisoned the tree, spread the rumor that Regina was out to make the villagers feel her pain and fled into the night. He was burdened by this secret, guilty of breaking his love's heart and never could face her. He tried to drown his sorrow with other relationships but it always felt empty. It wasn't loneliness that withered him. It was guilt. He asked if I had visited Regina. “Is she well? Has she forgiven me?”

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Bless his heart. He doesn't know. I brought him to Regina's house. The sight of her statue was too much for him. He broke down, crying, hugging the statue. My own heart ached for them. Tenderly, Otto kissed the statue on the lips, crying “I'm sorry” over and over. The last goodbye. Each sorry was filled with regret. Something miraculous happened. The statue started to crack. Piece by piece, stone fell and flesh was revealed. Regina was coming back to life. I bid her blood to run, before she comes undone, willing her to save herself from the nothing she's become. She looked at Otto in the eyes, murmuring, “I know you. I walked with you once upon a dream. I know you. That look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam.” They kissed. The greatest magic of all, true love's kiss. Turns out, it was Grimhilde who turned Regina in to stone and planted the spell in front of her to cast suspicion off of herself. Solving one problem was great, but it was no closer to healing the tree. Knowing the cause of the dying tree was great, but I couldn't possibly kiss the tree back to life, right? Well, we walked to the tree. Otto didn't know how his mother poisoned the tree but he knew his mother well enough. He started sniffing, looking for signs of his mother's magic trace. He stopped at one spot and started digging.

Eventually, he came back up with an apple in his hand. “Aha!” We destroyed the apple and watched as the tree started to gain some colour. It was healing. The villagers started streaming to the town square. There were cheers and merrymaking. All was well. This is what I love about my work. Getting to the bottom of mysteries, exposing hidden secrets and making the lives of the people better with truth and transparency. It is a hard, lonely road. But when mysteries get solved, the joy of seeing people getting closure or having their problems solve makes it all worth it. So even though I'm out travelling during the holidays and a part of me wishes I was home with a husband and children, I'm glad I chose this path. I'm glad I didn't have the imaginary family I sometimes dream about, the fantasy of the love and warm waiting for me at home. Even though my home is cold and silent, what warms my heart isn't at home, it is out there in the world, with the people. Until next time, readers, hopefully solving another mystery or exposing the secrets the government is keeping from us. Happy holidays and a merry new year!


NEWS AND FEATURES QUIBBLER

Be sure to throw the rubber duck out with the bathwater, ministry warns: The Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office is informing all persons in possession of modified rubber ducks that if found to be in possession of such an artifact as of January 12th, 2018, they will be charged in accordance with the newly expanded Muggle Protection Act. In which the original Act has been amended to close the so-called “Intention Loophole� which allowed witches and wizards to bewitch and keep modified muggle artifacts so long as there was no evidence they planned to use such an artifact. The expanded act is also cracking down on its definition of Muggle Artifacts, now including an ad-hoc list of traditional muggle inceptions also used in muggle households, including modified rubber ducks, that are also present in wizarding homes.

intended to fly it. No one was charged in the incident as a result of the loophole.

This loophole was first noted when Hogwarts students Ron Weasley and Harry Potter flew a Ford Anglia modified with flight and invisibility charms across Britain. Ministry wizard, Arthur Weasley had modified the car, but had not

The situation continues to develop.

Rubber ducks had been excluded under this rule as they had found popularity in many wizarding households throughout Britain over the last decade. Some are claiming the ministry is choosing to trample on our rights. The ministry claims that joke rubber ducks with freezing charms or a combination incendio and flamefreezing charm that causes harmless, but startling flames to appear in the bath are an obvious threat to the International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy. It is of course an established fact that most muggles have an absurd and debilitating love for rubber ducks.

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(Dumbledore’s Army) Every bit as familiar to the Wizarding World as the reindeer that now stand upon our mantels or fly through winter displays, the Patronus of boy-whoconquered Harry Potter is known even to those of us who have never personally witnessed its appearance. Indeed a great many shops now stock more glittery white deer than the normal sort, lending that extra feeling of security to our Christmas scenes. The stag is quite aptly considered the protector of all other creatures and in various cultures is associated with peace, power, sensitivity, intuition and harmony. In Celtic tradition, it represents the pursuit of wisdom and in some myths, the “in between” - a world connecting the waking and dream worlds. The Patronus is said to present those hidden, but essential parts of ourselves. The reserves on which we draw when we are most in need. Well, some reserves are better hidden than others. What of the others who played a part in the Dark Lord’s downfall? Most prominent among these are Mr. Potter’s closest friends, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger, whose Patronuses take the form 14

of a Jack Russell Terrier and a Eurasian Otter respectively. A Jack Russell Terrier is a small dog roughly equivalent to a Crup with a single-pointed tail. Though often bad-tempered, these more mundane creatures express it equally toward all people, unlike their Wizard-bred brethren, which are particularly vicious toward Muggles. - Rather fitting for a non-supremacist Pureblood. Dogs of course, are fierce defenders and intensely loyal. These smaller breeds are often overlooked and not considered much of a threat to any but the most fearful of Cynophobiacs. But those that offend a Jack Russell soon learn not to do so again. They are vocal, energetic, alert and stubborn. - You will never win a battle of wills with one. They were originally bred for hunting other small animals, including, quite conveniently, otters. Dogs additionally symbolise guidance, faithfulness and love and friendship and are considered guardians the world over. Although taking the shape of a much larger dog of obviously mixed heritage, another dog was formerly produced by notso-convicted Azkaban escapee, Sirius Black. How proud his mother would have been.

As aquatic creatures, otters, meanwhile, are symbolic of life and healing and have long been associated with the moon. The Algonquin named one of their full moons - the first after the Spring equinox - the “otter moon”. This may link back to the idea of purifying water and was certainly picked for their most active time of the year which is indeed during the Spring and Summer. Otters symbolise joy, agility, energy, creativity, dexterity and curiosity. They are endlessly playful, highly protective and conscientious, taking great care of their young and each other. Otters will hold hands in their sleep while in the water so that they don’t drift apart and each pup is given individual swimming lessons and fluffed up perfectly to keep them warm. The form cast by the new Mrs. Potter is that of a horse. Some of the very earliest ancestors of this creature were no larger than a dog, but were domesticated over time and grew in stature. It is said that no other animal has contributed more to the spread of civilization and as such,they became symbols of freedom and power. In some cultures, white horses specifically stand for the balance of wisdom and power,


INSERT QUIBBLER while in Christian tradition it came to represent death. The horse became a sign of wealth and status worldwide. The bond between horse and humans arguably eclipsed that of our relationship with dogs - at least for a while. They were highly venerated by the Celts, treated with great care and respect. And they believed this respect to be reciprocated, the horse acting as a protector. Thus they took on religious significance and were carved into stone and the very land itself, as well as becoming an integral part of their myths and folklore and their forms often being replicated by more magical creatures, including centaurs, hippogriffs and kelpies. One of the former Weasley’s contemporaries, magi-zoologist Luna Scamander, nee Lovegood, is known to produce a hare Patronus. Tougher and more solitary than their rabbit cousins, young hares - called leverets can feed themselves within a few hours of their birth. The native Algonquian peoples of Canada and ancient Egyptians each reserved a place in their creation myths for the hare. It is a symbol of diligence and challenges pursued and are associated with speed and artistic pursuits. In Celtic mythology and folklore,

they are linked to the mysterious Otherworld and was the chosen form of many shapeshifters. They were associated with the moon, as in many other cultures, due to their nocturnal activity, as well as the apparent shape of one being visible upon its surface. Hares were considered to have supernatural powers of their own and were admired for their strength and speed. They were seen as mysterious and magical, so thought of as an animal to be treated with caution and to hunt or eat one was considered highly taboo. The hare has also featured in the mythology of other cultures for thousands of years. Including being associated with the Northern European Saxon goddess Ēostre or Ostara, from whence we derive the word Easter, as mentioned by the English monk Bede in 725 AD. Twin brothers George, and the late Fred Weasley produced a coyote and hyena respectively. Though bearing greater outward resemblance to Canids, Hyenas are actually closer to cats, but most closely related to Herpestidae, family of mongooses and meerkats. Historically, the Hyena has been seen in a negative light, being associated with gluttony and cowardice, while its knowledge

has been seen as debased, profane and earthy. This is thought to stem from their scavenging nature and their cry, which often resembles hysterical human laughter, which many considered sinister, especially when heard in the middle of the night. Despite these associations, they are strong, intelligent and adaptable. They are thus considered wise and linked to contentment with what one has. And by all accounts, the hysterical laughter is also quite fitting. The coyote is also a symbol of humour, but also of cunning and survival. They are portrayed often as the “wise fool”, helping people to see the truth in difficult situations. They are equally adaptable, able to handle much hardship and seeing the humour in even the worst situations. It is particularly sad then that following the untimely death of his twin, George Weasley has lost the ability to cast a Patronus at all.

(The Order of the Phoenix) Another Patronus familiar to many of us is the Phoenix of former Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, for which his Order was named. The symbolism of transformation, renewal and

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rebirth should provide some reassurance to those who still carry suspicion, following the revelation of the Professor’s past. This flamboyantly-plumed bird is proud and detached and connects only to those it deems worthy, but its bonds are eternal. Furthermore, its tears heal and its feathers often used by wandmakers, perfectly demonstrating their innate magical strength. It is associated in various cultures with life, time, creativity and clarity. His brother’s takes the form of a goat. Make of that what you will. Dumbledore’s deputy at Hogwarts and protector of students produces a tabby cat. Much like the phoenix, the cat is also symbolic of rebirth and resurrection, hence the old wives’ tale concerning their nine lives. They can be solitary 16

and independent, while at the same time basking in creature comforts. They have been both feared and loved by many cultures throughout both history and folklore, both held as sacred and villainised. The Oglala believed that cats had powerful magic and the ability to curse people, thus they refused all association with anything feline. The Egyptians had multiple cat goddesses, including Mafdet, Sekmet and Bast, and cats were likewise associated with the Celtic goddess Brighid, further highlighting the cats’ historical connection with the feminine. Cats are sensitive and affectionate, yet unpredictable and stealthy and have long been linked to witchcraft. Because they are naturally nocturnal, they are also associated with darkness, linking them to fear, to the unconscious and to the hidden. They are symbols of magic, mystery and healing. Altogether,

this suggests a powerful and determined individual, outwardly aloof but with a hidden soft centre. Minister Shacklebolt’s Patronus, meanwhile, takes the form of a lynx, a type of solitary cat found in northern forests. They are stealthy animals that hunt at night to avoid humans and are thus rarely seen. Lynx are very good hunters with excellent vision and hearing. They symbolise confidence, intuition, instinct, secrecy, independence, trust and patience. They see through deceptions and in some cultures are associated with foresight and spiritual wisdom. The lynx hunts by stalking its prey, much as the Minister did in his days as an Auror, often jumping on it from above. Arthur Weasley, father to all four Weasleys mentioned above, as well as three others, casts


INSERT QUIBBLER a weasel. They are stealthy, energetic and above all, curious. They tend to be well-grounded and observant - some might say analytical. They are considered by many to be quite cunning, and indeed weasels will quite willingly take food of burrows from other creatures, given the chance. They are, however, intelligent, intuitive and highly flexible. Weasels are often quickly judged and underestimated, as they are small in stature and will not display their full ability unless necessary. The Ancient Greeks saw their value however and used weasels instead of cats to catch mice. They are bold, tenacious and able to take down animals far larger than themselves, including birds of prey. They have an eye for strategy, zigzagging when they run and do a peculiar kind of war dance when threatened or excited, which is speculated to mesmerise prey. They also like peace and serenity - and with seven children, who can blame him?

family-oriented. Native American myths speak of creation and the cycle of death and rebirth. It is seen as a teacher to the peoples of California and the Great Plains and connected them to the spirit. In the Lakota language, the word for wolf, sunkmanitu, means “divine dog.” Parts of Western Europe saw them less positively. German and Norse representations were of chaos and destruction. But Roman mythology spoke of the wolf which raised the very founders of their society.

It may come as little surprise to some that the Werewolf Remus Lupin cast a wolf, when not purposely holding back and producing only silvery vapour. Rare witnesses to the wolf ’s appearance, though, have reported not the short snout and tufted tail of a lycanthrope, but a regular grey wolf. Although the unfortunate Mr. Lupin was bitten well before he attained the age of wand ownership, it is widely speculated by those that knew him that it would always have taken this form. The wolf is, quite rightly, one of the most respected animals in the world. And despite the prejudice of some, its caster was more than worthy of that same respect. Like him, the wolf is friendly, loyal, sociable, intelligent and very

Another unknown form is that of not-the-boy-who-lived, Neville Longbottom. It is widely rumoured not to be corporeal at all, thanks to a distinct lack of sufficiently happy memories to fuel it. What might it have been if even one distant memory of home had been retained? Well, if the Patronus is meant to embody our inner selves, then this creature too must be quite fierce. By all accounts, his troubled past (The Unknown) left the Mr. Longbottom quite timid and reserved in his younger The Patronus of Dumbledore’s years, but, as the saying goes, apparent second-in-command and successor to leadership of the whatever does not kill us makes us stronger. It is with this in mind Order, Alastor Moody, remains that I suggest the Cape Buffalo. unknown. Notoriously paranoid Native to Africa, it is considered as he was, it seems likely that one of the continent’s “Big Five” the ex-Auror considered casting - a checklist for safari tourists and one in public to be too revealing. hunters alike. The other four are Moody lost various body parts

Nymphadora Lupin, formerly Tonks, is said to have produced a Patronus to mirror that of her husband’s for a few years. Prior to the adaption of this form, it took the shape of a jackrabbit, another creature of the hare family and sharing much of the same symbolism. The more usual kind of rabbit is a symbol of family, comfort, abundance and new life, as well as intelligence, creativity and spontaneity. It is considered in many cultures to be lucky. The rabbit is a sign of the Chinese Zodiac and Greek mythology associates it with Hecate, goddess of magic, witchcraft, the night, moon, ghosts and necromancy. Egyptian hieroglyphics associate the rabbit with the concept of being. - Apt, considering the dual classification given to Werewolves by the Ministry.

during his career, yet persevered right up to the point of retirement and battled on long beyond it. This strongly suggests a Honey Badger, also known as a Ratel. The Honey Badger is smart, solitary and utterly fearless. Few creatures dare to take it on and it will pick a fight with anything that moves. Bee stings, porcupine quills and animal bites rarely penetrate their skin, but when they do, the Honey Badger simply doesn’t care. They are notorious for their strength, ferocity and toughness and have been known to savagely and fearlessly attack almost any kind of animal, including lions. They are tireless in combat and can wear out much larger animals in physical confrontations. They tear into beehives on a regular basis, but will eat virtually anything. They have been known to drive lions away from their kills and will even dispatch and consume venomous snakes. All but the bravest and most adept predators simply leave it alone.

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QUIBBLER INSERT more than capable of harming or outright killing a human, but it is the humble Buffalo that they fear above all others. A wounded Buffalo often runs toward, rather than away from its attacker and at a height of up to five point six feet at the shoulder and weighing in at up to one thousand kilograms, it’s little wonder that they are thought to kill up to two hundred people every year. Buffalos represent needs fulfilled and respect for all things. They are humble, stoic, honourable and independent, with great strength of character. Their skin is very thick and their horns have fused bases, forming a continuous bone shield across the tops of their heads and further strengthening the horns themselves. They might look slow and lumbering from a distance, but this is no domestic

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cattle and few who would attack it will live long enough to regret their decision. Molly Weasley, wife to Arthur, is another member of the Order of the Phoenix whose Patronus we can find no record of, but can quite easily be visualised as a red-breasted goose. Frequently nesting in small colonies close to birds of prey, the geese enjoy the protection that their fellow avians provide, but are far from defenseless themselves. Geese stand for valour, bravery and protection themselves, in addition to loyalty, confidence, determination and fellowship. Some might consider them silly, but a goose never leaves one of its own behind. If one should become injured during their annual migration, another goose

will fall back from the flock and remain with it until it has either recovered or breathed its last. Geese are famously protective of their young and will defend them to the end. They are authoritative and sometimes borderline aggressive - they have frequently been used to guard property in place of dogs, or even to herd other animals. But they are also kind and humble and the perfect creature to have fighting your corner. Her eldest son, renowned curse-breaker Bill is generally considered to be laid-back and likable. Both skilled and brave, he is one of a somewhat exclusive group of individuals known to have gained twelve OWLs, which surely means that he can’t be short on intelligence, either. For


INSERT QUIBBLER his Patronus, therefore, I would suggest a mongoose. These small creatures are well-known for killing and eating venomous snakes, and as a member of the mustelid family, are closely related to Arthur’s weasel. It has supreme courage and confidence in its abilities, along with lightning-fast reactions, speed and agility. While not completely immune to the venom of, say, a cobra, it can take up to eight times the usual lethal dose for a creature of its size to bring it down. Despite its reputation as a predator, the mongoose can actually make a very lovable and protective pet. They can be impulsive, even rebellious, but also helpful and heroic. They have a great survival instinct and

form strong, lasting bonds.

know well the Harpy-like form occasionally taken on by her fullHis wife Fleur, former Triwizard blooded relatives, but the bird Champion for the Beauxbatons awarded this name by biologists Academy, has shown a softer side is itself very capable. They are in more recent years, following strong and patient but when they the impression many seemed to spot an opening or are forced to form of her when she first entered defend, they are fierce and give the country in 1995. Though no quarter, clearly demonstrating always showing concern for those themselves to be virtually fearless. she cared for, many considered They form lifelong bonds and her blunt and perhaps a touch care little for outward displays. arrogant at times. However, she It is one of the most feared showed great bravery, fierce hunters in Brazilian forests and loyalty and boundless compassion to many indigenous peoples, during the war and in caring considered the father of all birds, for her injured husband and her symbolising stamina, resilience, name would not have been drawn eagerness and prowess. The from the Goblet of Fire were she heights to which eagles soar have not magically skilled. I therefore also linked them to the divine. propose the phoenix-like Harpy Eagle. As a part-Veela, Fleur would

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QUIBBLER NEWS AND FEATURES

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NEWS AND FEATURES QUIBBLER

An Ode To A Hero When the night is dark and the moon is waning, When the sun covers the clouds and the birds cease their chirping, This is when we feel a shadow has crossed our rainbow of life. This is when we know the world has changed inexplicably.

by silvertail8

When the dog turns tail and the cat runs to us, When the professor sends you home with no warning, This is when a weight slips from our shoulders into our hearts and bellies. This is when we are on the cusp of a new era. 'Why has this happened?' We look toward the empty night sky. 'What will we do?' We beg of unknown entities. The answer? Nothing and everything. This is the moment you will remember always. What is dead may never die. Death...is but the next great adventure. Que sera, sera. What will be, will be. <3

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QUIBBLER INSERT From the depths of the ocean From the hollows of the earth Comes a sound not unlike The cry of a beast in pain

Then from nowhere a hand reaches out Then from nowhere a voice calls out And it's coming from a house That looks just like ours

It rattles the windows It shakes the doors In the small wooden frame Of the house we call a heart

The paint looks weathered The hinges are squeaky But the windows are clean And the tables are sturdy

We cry out against the sound We compete to be heard But the sound cannot be silenced And no soul hears our words

We walk through trimmed doorways We walk through cushioned rooms They smile as we come into sight Glad to have found us in the night

The heavens open on us The skies relieve their burden We are drenched in the evidence Of our own suffering lives

Our clothes are in tatters Our smile seems forced Everything about us is in slight disrepair But the stranger seems not to care They give us a hug and a pat They give us a cup of tea and a snack

You and

I

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INSERT QUIBBLER The cry in the dark and the aching heart All comes rushing out in a shower All of the loneliness spills from our lips All of the pain collects at our feet And still, they gather our tears Listening to what we have kept in for so long In them, we have found a companion In them, we have found a similar soul A comfort from the harsh world outside And an anchor from the tides of sorrow

I shake my head in confusion "The hand that reached was yours, not mine" "The voice that called was yours, not mine" Two accounts of the same instance Two versions of the same moment We saved each other that day You and I -The Bard of Eldewist

Minutes turn into days turn into weeks Weeks turn into months turn into years Old habits quickly turn to dust As new habits pave the way for new life Something akin to happiness stirs Something akin to peace begins to fall Mending the hurts of the past And covering the scar of yesterday's wound Perhaps our suffering is at an end Perhaps our happiness is assured The whispers are meant for our ears alone But somehow our actions made it known Around us, the skies are lightening Around us, the breeze is like a song Sunshine and laughter fill our days We walk on clouds in a light haze On that bright day of bells and smiles On that bright day of words and vows I give myself wholly to you Reminding us of how you saved me Still, life keeps on coming Still you manage to surprise me "Do you not remember?" you ask

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Ministry of Magic to Bring Forward Election Date? by ElphabaPfenix

M

inister of Magic, Kingsley Shacklebolt, has announced plans to bring forward the election of a new Minister of Magic before the election deadline of 12th December 2019 in a press conference this morning. Citing health reasons, the Minister has expressed intention to dissolve the current parliament and hold a General Election as early as April 2019, coinciding with the end of the Ministry’s fiscal year. This comes after allegations of mental breakdowns and dissent within the parliament ranks over the past few months. A recent bout of dragon pox has been making its rounds and resulted in multiple deaths among the “Old Guards” of the Ministry. Perhaps an early election will help ensure a candidate of the Ministry’s choosing being

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elected to the position before the disease can take out their majority and cause the public to lose faith. With the current government’s popularity on a decline ever since the fall of Voldemort in 1998, approval ratings has dropped in to the single digits and their achievement of the Battle of Hogwarts being overshadowed by poor policy decisions over the past two decades, the government is hard pressed to nominate a candidate that appeals to the younger generation of wizards and witches, if they want to remain in power. A source close to the Whitehall has leaked that the current contender for nomination is Deputy Head of Magical Law Enforcement, Ms. Hermione Granger.

Ms. Granger has served diligently under Minister Shacklebolt and has proven to be a key personnel in aiding the Shacklebolt Administration in reforms of pro-pure blood laws. Adding to that, Granger made up a third of the core legendary trio who went up against Voldemort in 1998. She certainly serves well as a poster child to remind the public on the role the ministry had in bringing to the end of a dark age. Having just passed her 40th birthday in September, Granger is poised to be one of the youngest Minister of Magic, if elected. In other news, the Ministry of Magic has announced tax rebates for all in 2019 as celebration for the 20 year anniversary of the fall of Voldemort. More details will be sent via owl by the end of next month.


TRAVEL QUIBBLER

The Quibbler’s Guide to Winter Broom Care and Safe Flying Practices By RealisticAppeal With the winter season now upon us, The Quibbler urges all broom-bound witches and wizards international and domestic - to exercise additional caution when taking to the skies.

There were 247 mostly avoidable incidents which occurred on broomsticks between November 2017 and February 2018 according to a document compiled by The Ministry of Magic - 13 of which involved some rather unfortunate Muggles. Following is a list of the top five tips you can put into action to make your winter a (relatively) calamity-free one: 1. Remember to regularly maintain your broom Broomstick Servicing Kits are readily available from vendors up and down the country, although we at The Quibbler have found that Quality Quidditch Supplies in Diagon Alley are the most competitively priced. While all of the products contained within a Broomstick Servicing Kit serve their purpose, it is important to use the Tail-Twig Clippers frequently to ensure maximum control over your broom. 2. Give your broom the once-over BEFORE flying This mostly applies to older broomsticks e.g. any Cleansweep broomsticks and earlier Nimbus models. Check that the wood of your broomstick is pliable, but secure enough to endure your weight and the forces of flight. 3. Consider purchasing protective goggles There are many brands available but none perform better than Ernest Cornea’s EverClear goggles. Subjected to the finest Impervius Charm by only the most qualified witches and wizards, no other goggles can offer you the visibility and safety like a pair of EverClear’s. 4. Buy broomsticks sold by reputable outlets only Mavis Boldbeak bought her broom from a back-street vendor in London for the low, low price of 15 Galleons. “I couldn’t believe it,” she said. “I was flying over West Yorkshire, when all of a sudden, my broom caught fire. I landed in an odd sort of place, filled with Muggles who later had to be obliviated.” 5. Only undertake journeys which are necessary We at The Quibbler know that flying - and the great British sport of Quidditch - are exhilarating endeavours, but we must emphasise the importance and sanity of one’s decision to only fly when necessary. Of the 247 incidents the Ministry recorded, 106 happened on Christmas Day alone. To all our readers, please, stay safe!

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The 4-House Family

TRAVEL QUIBBLER

By: emilyolivia33

I can’t believe it’s been twenty years Since I first read of Harry Potter I remember waiting in line at the store With my brother, some snacks, and some water I remember how excited we were each year We couldn’t wait for each book to come out We pretended to have an invisibility cloak To no avail, we heard, “What’s all this fuss about?” We got two copies because we wouldn’t share We would compare how far we had gotten I was the faster reader, by far But for my brother, no detail forgotten Now twenty years later, I live in New York City In Moscow, my brother and his wife make their home And we began to hatch a simple plan Using WhatsApp and our phones Harry Potter and the Cursed Child had come to my town And we were all anxious to see it Several friends of mine had gone and raved “Oh, the special effects! You won’t believe it!” So my brother and wife flew from Moscow And from Denver our parents came, too And we entered the theatre with the crowds and the fans The story engrossed us so much that the time flew! The plays are really a treasure See them if you possibly can!

There’s a reason they won all those Tonys You’ll love it if you are a fan I had such a wonderful time with my family We all got sorted when we found Pottermore I am a Slytherin and my brother, a Ravenclaw When we were young, life was never a bore! I soon after discovered Reddit And quickly joined Slytherin House I thank you all for reminding me What fun life is when there’s magic about! Author's Note: My dad and my brother’s wife are both Gryffindors, my mother is Hufflepuff, my brother is a Ravenclaw, snd I am a Slytherin. We represent the four houses And are one family (not unlike Hogwarts)

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Muggle Candy Worth Traveling For North Africa Edition by Eldis Hello everyone, and welcome to the fourth instalment of Muggle Candy Worth Travelling For! We have travelled together from Europe to America, from Canda all the way down to Chile and Argentina. Today, we will travel to North Africa, the upper half of a beautiful and enormous continent. Known for its many different countries and cultures, Africa surely has a lot to offer. Even though this continent is often overlooked, it is the source of the majority of magic, making it the most important location in the Wizarding World. The International Statute of Secrecy is less strict here since magic is so interwoven with the culture that it is difficult to keep it secret. This does not mean, however, that you can just use magic without any care. Please consult the Travel Department in the Ministry of Magic (located on the third floor) for the specific laws related to the countries you are visiting.

We will start in Morocco. This beautiful country offers many delicious sweets and treats. Ghoribas, for example! These cookies are similar to shortbread, but they are a bit more crunchy. They are flavoured with lemon, cinnamon, almonds and orange blossom water, and enjoyed with the traditional Moroccan Mint Tea. Merendina treats, a genoise vanilla sponge sandwiched with chocolate ganache, are well-known by Moroccan millennials. These chocolate-covered cakes melt in the mouth and in your hands, but are definitely worth the mess. If you happen to attend a special

occasion during your visit to Morocco, you are sure to find M’hanncha, also known as ‘snake pie’. It’s made with traditional pastry and almond paste rolled into a serpent-like shape. Can’t get enough of almonds? Try briouats! This dessert consists of filo pastry filled with almond paste and flavoured with cinnamon and orange blossom water, deep-fried and dipped in honey for a delicious sweet taste! Not the biggest fan of almonds? Don’t worry! Try Krachel! They are aniseed and sesame seed sweet buns, not too sweet and not too savoury! A perfect in-between, and especially delicious when enjoyed with cheese. Puff-puffs are a traditional treat

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QUIBBLER INSERT in Niger! It’s made with spiced batter, usually containing diced fresh pepper, and deep-fried. If you’re not good with hot food, try the coconut candies instead! It’s made from shredded coconut and sugar, making for a deliciously sweet treat. Chin chins, little crunchy blocks of deep-fried dough, are delicious and easy to prepare. They also offer cornes de gazelles, literally translated to gazelle horns. These crescent-shaped cookies with almond-paste and cinnamon are a true delight to your taste buds. From Niger, let’s travel to neighbouring Libya! Here you can enjoy the traditional Mhalbiya, a sweet dessert made from milk or cream and sugar. Although the origin is uncertain, the recipe most likely came into existence somewhere in the Middle Ages,

where it was considered an ideal food for the sick. Makroudh is often enjoyed during the Ramadan. It is made out of sweet pastry, made with semolina and flour, filled with dates and nuts or almond paste. It is shaped like a diamond and fried in oil or oven-baked. Afterwards, it’s soaked in a sweet syrup. Kanafeh is also dipped in sweet syrup, but this pastry is typically 28

In Liberia, you simply have to try milk candy. They are sort of similar to the Argentinan Dulce de Leche, as it’s both made from condensed milk. However, where Dulce the Leche is usually more fluid, milk candy is rolled into balls and garnished, making it more solid. layered with cheese or clotted cream and nuts. Legend has it that this treat was created and prescribed by doctors to satisfy the hunger during Ramadan, and some say the recipe has existed since the 10th century. Egypt also has its fair share of treats to offer. Umm Ali, for example, which literally translated means ‘The Mother of Ali.’ This sweet is made with phyllo pastry, milk, double-cream and nuts. If you’re not ready to say goodbye to the fall season, you can try Quara’ ‘Asali, baked pumpkin. Not to be confused with pumpkin pie, this sweet treat is baked but has no crust. Khushaf is also found during the Ramadan, and consists of dates and dried fruits in water and sugar. Let’s move down to Sudan! There, the Kahk are delicious sugary cookies, traditionally baked at home and shared with family, friends, neighbours and guests. They are crumbly and flaky, and although they are dusted with icing sugar they are not too sweet. This country also offers the delicious Halawa simsim, or sesame candy. It’s a crunchy sweet dessert made from roasted sesame seed mixed with caramelized sugar. There is a reason most dental repairing spells originated in Africa!

Ghana offers kuli-kuli, made from roasted and grounded peanuts. They are made into a paste called ‘labu’, mixed with spices and salt, formed and fried. Nkate cake, also made from peanuts, is very popular there too. It’s made by crushing the peanuts in tiny bits and mixing it with caramel, creating a delicious peanut brittle. Last but not least, let’s visit Senegal. Here the Five-Cent cookies, or, Cinq Centimes, are often sold in marketplaces. The base is made from sugary cookies, which are covered in peanut butter and garnished with peanuts. If peanuts are not your thing, try thiakry! This is a sweet millet couscous dish, made by mixing milk, condensed milk or yoghurt with dried fruit and coconut, spiced to taste. Thank you for joining me on this trip through North-Africa. Join us next time as we move south and discover everything the middle of this continent has to offer, for it is sure to be delicious!


TRAVEL QUIBBLER No time or money to travel? Here are some recipes to bring North Africa to you!

Chin Chin Ingredients:

60 grams of butter at room temperature, or 60 ml (¼ cups) of sunflower oil 2 eggs 610 grams (4 ¾ cups) of plain flour 2 grated nutmegs 250 ml (1 cup) of milk 100 grams (½ cups) of sugar (more or less to taste) pinch of salt optional: frying oil

Directions:

1. Mix all dry ingredients together 2. Add the wet ingredients (except for the frying oil) 3. Form into a dough, knead until smooth 4. Roll the dough out flat 5. Cut the dough into small cubes, about 2 by 1 cm (or any other desired shapes!)

Coconut Candy Ingredients:

400 grams (4 cups) of unsweetened shredded coconut 100 grams (½ cups) of brown sugar 2 tablespoons of honey 60 ml (¼ cups) of water 1 tbsp of butter

Directions:

1. Add the sugar, honey and butter to a nonstick souse pan, add water. 2. Bring mixture to a boil on low heat until the sugar caramelises. Don’t stir!! 3. Lower the heat, add the shredded coconut and carefully stir 4. Let simmer until everything has combined together and the coconut is browned 5. Immediately scoop about 1/4th of a cup, or a big spoon, onto a baking tray lined with baking paper. Do this until the pan is empty. 6. Once it cools slightly, form the heaps into round balls (or whichever shape you desire) 7. Let cool and enjoy!

a) If you want, you can make twisted ones! b) Cut a small hole in the middle c) Stretch the dough d) Turn one of the ends through the incision e) Repeat and stretch 6. If you wish to fry your Chin Chins, warm up the frying oil so it is very hot and fry the Chin Chins till they are golden brown 7. If you wish to bake your Chin Chins, warm the oven to 160 Celsius degrees/320 Fahrenheit. Put your Chin Chins on a baking tray lined with baking paper and bake for 20 minutes. Then, turn up your oven to 180 Celsius degrees/356 Fahrenheit and bake for another 15 minutes (or, bake until brown) Let them cool and enjoy! Store in airtight container.

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QUIBBLER INSERT

Profiles in Potent Potion Parts:

Garlic by BottleOfAlkahest ong flat green leaves rising directly out of the ground, flower clusters wrapped in thin paper, and a bulb made up of sections. Garlic is an ancient plant cultivated and grown all across the world. This plant is most often known for its culinary uses but as any potion-wise witch or wizard knows it can also be a powerful magical ingredient as well. All three parts of the garlic plant are distinct in properties and can be used for culinary and magical purposes alike. Each part must be harvested at a different time of year and has different storage requirements. Depending on the type of potion different ingredients can be used more effectively than others.

L

Garlic can be grown in any area where the yearly temperatures reach down to at 30

least 4 C without freezing the ground freezing solidly through and regularly rise above 10 C for a large portion of the year. The ideal USDA zones for garlic are 8 – 10. It may be possible to grow garlic in warmer areas of the world but a freezing charm will be necessary. Garlic requires the cold temperature in order to develop the characteristic sections in the bulb. If the bulb will be planted in an area with warmer winters then a light freezing charm should be placed on the bulb every day for at least a month before it is planted. If the charm is too strong it may kill the bulb. It is best to plant garlic in late fall when the temperatures are cool but still above freezing this allows the plants to send out roots and establish themselves. To plant garlic it is necessary to separate the individual sections of the bulb and bury them about 3 inches deep with the pointed end facing up. They may start to send out shoots before the frost

kills them back this dieback is not something concerning. If planted in a warmer climate soft-neck garlic may withstand the warmer winters better; although hardneck garlic is often easier to grow in the witch or wizards home garden. There are three different parts of the garlic plant that can be harvested and used for potion making. Each part must be harvested at a different time of year. The three usable parts are the shoots, the scape, and the bulb. The shoots grow after the garlic has been planted and before the winters hard frost kills them back. It is possible to harvest the shoots and use them for potion brewing fresh or dried. Scapes are long thin tubes that grow out of the center of the leaves, there is a tell-tale bump that makes the scape easy to distinguish. The scape can be harvested several months after the spring regrowth and may


MAGICAL PLANTS AND CREATURES QUIBBLER regrow several times throughout the growing season. The scapes should be removed every time they grow or they may flower and stunt the potency of the bulb. The bulb is the third part of the plant which can be harvested and should be pulled up after the leaves begin to naturally die back in mid-summer. Garlic should be harvested with an iron blade and when possible brewed in an iron cauldron. If an iron blade is not available a gold blade can be substituted instead. It is always best to harvest Garlic when the sun is up. Each part of the plant can best be stored long term by drying it. The dried shoots can be stored whole, sliced, or powdered. The scapes should be dried whole and if they are cut or powdered the entire scape should be stored together as the most potent magical part of the scape is the characteristic bulge. Scape that has been powdered can be of unreliable potency depending on how much of the bulge is in every portion. The bulb of the garlic plant can be cured and stored whole, each separate section can then be peeled off and shaved, chopped, or used whole. Dried shoots and scapes are not as potent as fresh ones and using the chopped or powdered forms will cause them to be absorbed into the potion faster. Any potion that requires a long boil such as an antidote should avoid using any but the whole unchopped or unpowdered form. The bulb of the garlic plant is less potent when it is fresh and its potency grows when it is cured. There are many popular potions that include garlic as an ingredient. As such, any witch or wizard should be sure to keep several forms of garlic

in the ingredients cupboard as well as the garden. Garlic is an important ingredient in love potion antidotes but because of the length of time antidotes must be brewed only cured garlic cloves should be used. Using any form of shoots or scapes may not be potent enough to survive the boiling process and the resulting antidote may not be able to counteract a strong love potion. Unintuitively garlic is also an ingredient in some love potions and not just their antidotes. When love potions require garlic only shoots and scapes should be utilized and never the cloves. Using garlic cloves in a love potion may make the resulting potion weaker. Garlic is also an ingredient in many poisons and should only be added whole and never sliced. Any knife used to add ingredients to a poison should never touch garlic juice or the knife may drain some of the poisonous potency of any other ingredient that it touches. If the garlic must be cut a knife specifically for this purpose and no other must be used. Popular strengthening potions often call for garlic and the potioneer must be careful to select the form of garlic based on the strength of the other ingredients. If the potioneer is too heavy handed with the form of garlic used the potion may produce too much of a strengthening effect. This is especially true in some beauty potions such as hair strengthening potions where too much garlic may make the hair so strong that it presents as brittle and intractable.

potency of the plant in its various stages the dedicated student of potions can determine when it is most beneficial to use one particular part or preparation to the desired effect. This is especially important with garlic as it can often overwhelm a potion if the wrong part is added or even negate the effects if the wrong form is used. Garlic can be a finicky ingredient as too little can cause a potions effect to never materialize and too much can do the same. It is an unintuitive ingredient as it appears to be an important addition to opposing types of poisons. Many antidotes and poisons would both be useless without the addition of garlic. Because it is such a universal ingredient with such wide diversity between the uses of it’s parts all three forms should be kept in the ingredients cupboard at all times. It is often not possible to substitute one form of garlic for another depending on the potion being brewed. In order to ensure a quick and ready supply of garlic, especially fresh garlic, any witch or wizard with any type of Herbology interested should be sure to grow plenty in their home gardens. It is always handy to have some extra garlic around for potions as well as for cooking.

Garlic is an important ingredient in many potions and is a mainstay in any avid potioners ingredient cupboard. By studying the 31


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How to Take Care of Your Phoenix by DullRrepresentative5

It’s the holiday season! Yay! And what better way to spend the holiday season than next to your pet phoenix! Their fiery warmth will keep you… warm during the holiday season. Nailed it! This guide will make sure that you are keeping your phoenix in tip-top condition for its long life.

Step 1: Get a phoenix

This may seem like common sense, right? Obviously, the only reason you would read this guide is to learn how of take care of your phoenix is if you already have one. Nope! I know tons of people that read these articles for absolutely no reason, like me! So, anyway, it’s really hard to get a phoenix. If you’re lucky, you can get a phoenix from your family, as they are usually passed through generations. If not, it will be hard to find one. If you manage to get two phoenixes to mate, it will take several years to get their eggs to hatch. You may be able to buy a phoenix at Magical Menagerie, but from multiple interviews I have found that phoenixes only appear once a decade and cost 100 galleons. However, it is worth it as they live for many centuries.

Step 2: Feeding them

Phoenixes can eat many things, such as seeds, meat, and fruit. However, if you want to give your phoenix a treat, you can feed them some cooled down fire seeds (5 galleons a kg at your local apothecary). They love those, though the seeds may occasionally burn your hand. What they are more reluctant to consume, however, is floo powder, which are the brussel sprouts of phoenixes. If you somehow manage to feed them that, they will be colored green for… Oh, about a century or so.

Step 3: Burning days

If you are a familiar phoenix owner, then you know about burning days. However, did you know that if you wet the ashes while the phoenix is still rebirthing, it’ll die? So don’t do that. Also, did you know that the fire the phoenix is burnt in is harmless? If you collect it in a jar, you can sell it for a very high price. For a higher price, you can sell green phoenix fire, which is a highly valued ingredient for potions.

Step 4: Keeping your phoenix happy

Phoenixes are not like ordinary muggle birds. They do not need toys to entertain themselves. Just keep them near a window so they can appreciate nature. However, do not keep them near an open window. If their ashes are scattered before the rebirthing happens, the phoenix will die.

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Beware the Water by Rhia1

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I

f you have plans to visit Mahoutokoro, or other areas of the island of Japan, be wary. The Kappa have begun their migration to warmer waters. While this would normally not be a cause for concern, as this time of year is cold and you would not encounter this creature. However, due to Muggles lack of concern for the environment, the usual homes of the Kappa have been taken over. Due to this these fascinating creatures have begun their migration earlier than normal and, using different and more dangerous routes. These waterways take them into the sewers in Muggle towns and cities. The Japanese Ministry of Magic are currently having a hard time not only keeping Muggles from falling prey to the Kappa, but also keeping the Kappa safe in this toxic environment. A Kappa is an amphibious creature with a shell on its back and resembles a scalecovered monkey with webbed hands and a water-filled depression atop its head. The water in this hollow is the source of the creature's strength. The Kappa feed on the blood of humans, strangling anyone unlucky enough to wade into their ponds or rivers. For this reason, they have been ranks as XXXX in Japan. One can protect, and appease a Kappa by throwing a cucumber inscribed with that person's name; however, if they can trick it into bowing, the water in its head will spill out, weakening it. They live in shallow water, mainly in Japan.

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not treated properly, or found that they have been tricked into give a family their friendship, leaving misfortune in their wake. The aid the Kappa give varies from what the witch or wizard need. They help in gardens by calling water to irrigate the ground, heal wounds, and help with other work around the house. Despite all the dangers, many witches and wizards of Japan flock to the clear waterways to watch the Kappa migration, often camping out for days. Parents are advised to keep their children from the edge of the waterways in which they travel. The reason for coming to this spectacle varies from person to person. Some come to see if they can spot the Kappa from the riverbed, others to bid their Kappa friends a safe journey. It is an amazing sight to see nevertheless, and the atmosphere along the waterways is always filled with excitement, no matter what day you arrive. Not even the officials from the Japanese Ministry of Magic setting up a perimeter around the water’s edge dampen the festival-like feel. But never forget that there is danger in the waters at this time.

In their natural environment, the Kappa could easily hide from Muggles. This is growing increasingly difficult as time has gone on. They have also been known to become the equivalent of the House Elf, aiding those they have befriended in numerous tasks. However, unlike our House Elves, the Kappa must chose to aid their family, and their children usually leave once able to, leaving their parent(s) in the witch or wizard’s home. They can also leave the household at anytime if 35


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Timing with the Centaurs by Emliyolivia33


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n your years at Hogwarts, you have ventured alone on several occasions into the Forbidden Forest...something about the overgrown trees, the wildness of the land and the unknown creatures that live there have always fascinated you. Tonight, you leave your common room and venture out yet again...You know the trees near the grounds well by now. You have also learned how to move silently and swiftly. The land, although seeming hostile to others, has become a friend to you. Over the years, you have ventured deeper and deeper because of your familiarity. At this moment, you are tired from studying for a Potions exam tomorrow. You welcome the cool, crisp night air and find a younger tree to climb. Before climbing, you place your hand on the tree to acknowledge it and thank it for being a safe haven for you. Once the bond has been made, you begin to climb. You find the perfect spot! With your back against the trunk, you settle yourself in and the branches move in to support you. This young tree really enjoys your company on this autumn night. Your mind deeply relaxes, the cool air fills your lungs, and before you know it, you are falling asleep… You wake up to the sound of voices. You are not scared - it is clear to you that the young tree is very excited about the meeting that is taking place and protecting you in some way. You realize that the centaurs have gathered close by and, in

DIVINATION QUIBBLER the stillness of the forest, you can hear their voices clearly, although you cannot clearly make out their faces. You realize they are discussing the movement of the stars in the months ahead...

Voice 1: The first solar eclipse happens on January 5th of the new year! Voice 2: Eclipse seasons always bring such volatility - we must remember to be stable during the beginning days of the year. The big feasts will be over by then - and remember - no sudden decisions around then - I’m talking to you! (clearly a centaur was singled out at this moment with tremendous laughter following) Voice 1: This eclipse will be visible from Japan … lucky Centaurs at Mahoutokoro! But I am more interested in what happens on January 13… Voice 3: You mean the movement of the planet Jupiter making that tense relationship to Neptune! I am actually looking forward to all of that fantasizing and daydreaming of that time. There is no better time to let your mind wander and explore all of the different realities it can come up with! Voice 4: You mean there is no better time to live in denial! (Laughter!)


QUIBBLER INSERT Voice 3: Enjoying fantasy doesn’t always mean living in denial, you know! (Hoofs hitting the ground) Voice 1: On January 21 there will be a total lunar eclipse along with a supermoon! Supermoons are moons that are bigger and brighter than usual! Let’s plan an event in advance to watch this spectacular event, which will be visible in Europe, Asia, and North and South America. Lunar eclipses are super-emotion packed full moons! I love the event idea, but let’s not get too out of hand like last time! (Hoofs stomping the ground) Voice 2: Venus and Jupiter meet up the next day, January 22 now that’s a day for a feast! Two of the luckiest planets side by side! Hooray! You find you need to cover your ears for there is much loud shouting of HERE HERE! And BRAVO! The sound of hooves hitting the ground is deafening! The tree holds you closer… Voice 5: Let’s celebrate while we can because look ahead to February 13… You look up and suddenly notice that the sky is changing above you to match the dates when they are given! You realize it’s like a sky preview… Voice 2: What a volatile day! Mars - the planet of war together with Uranus - the planet of the rebel! That is a day to lay low… Voice 3: Or take unexpected action! Voice 4: Or be unpredictable just for fun! Voice 2: Keep you head! You know when planets get together there are always ramifications...any unpredictable actions taken on that day will have consequences…That’s why I was saying we need to LAY LOW! Voice 4: I heard you! Don’t be so serious! We all know you’re right, of course… Voice 1: And then on February 14, that day that is known as Valentine’s Day...the skies have a surprise! Voice 3: It’s quite unsettled this year, isn’t it? That Mars and Uranus meet-up means that relationships have an intensity and a bit of a wild mood too, ay? Voice 4: Hey, if you’re looking for a fling or something unconventional, you just might find it! Voice 5: Even those in an established relationship may want to try something new or different! On the mild side: try a new restaurant or go somewhere you’ve never been! On the wild side: Well now… (Hooves thunder!) Voice 4: I enjoy Mars-Uranus Meetups! I just know they aren’t great for responsibility or dependability so I run with it! Muffled voice: That’s not all you run with! (LAUGHTER) Voice 1: March looks quite calm, doesn’t it? 38

*Silence* You look up….the sky seems to be moving through time slower now, as if the centaurs are looking for key planetary shifts…. Voice 3: Found one! The sky suddenly stops! Voice 3: Look near the spring equinox on March 21… You can hear the sounds of some hooves shuffling and get the sense that everyone is studying the sky very intensely….

Voice 2: Oh...I see what you mean...There is an interesting and complex interplay...Jupiter and Venus are having a good interaction yet there is a difficult relationship between both of them and a sensitive point called the South Node of the Moon…. Voice 6: <deep voice> Quiet, quiet. We have seen this kind of interaction before, and it always seems to create frustration and intense challenges. The best way forward then is to watch circumstances unfold and look for opportunities for growth and improvement…Yes...it is a time for awareness…. At that moment, there is an unexpected noise...a ruffling of the autumn leaves that are on the ground… And the Centaurs all picked up their heads at once. In an instant, the meeting is over as they all rush to the source of the noise… The young tree that has shielded you begins to relax and a wide smile runs across your face! You wait for ten minutes or so...until you feel the forest has returned to normal. Then, you slide down the side of the tree and thank it. You gracefully and carefully find your way out of the forest...and you suddenly remember about that Potions exam tomorrow!


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Divine Your Valentines by Nellethiel

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t’s cold outside, but we all know the one day of the season that can really heat things up; Valentine’s Day! Unfortunately, a poorly planned day can change warm hearts to frigid feelings. With this guide, there’s no need to worry; you can divine your way to the perfect Valentine’s Day. Step 1: Telltale Tea Leaves Pour yourself a nice cup of tea while keeping your potential date in mind. Check to see if any floating leaves are pointed straight up, as this is an extremely lucky sign! Once the dregs remain and you have drained your cup, look for omens that favor fortune and prosperity. Keep a special eye out for clear hearts, anchors (beware if they’re upside down!) and triangles. These are all signs that a good relationship is in store.

If you have several potential dates, repeat this process for each one to find whose cup shows the most promise. Step 2: Scrying the Day Once you’ve determined who you’ll be spending the day with, you’ll need to work out the finer details. Set the mood by using dim lighting and invoke the scents of sandalwood and rose to help your mind focus on romance. Gaze into your orb and let the fog within shift. Be mindful for shapes in the mist that indicate activities or that you associate with specific locations. A broom shape might suggest you visit Quality Quidditch Supplies, or go for a fly with your arms wrapped around your partner for warmth as the wind stings 40


your cheeks red to cover your blushing! A bottle of Butterbeer might indicate you should avoid the traditional trip to Madam Puddifoot’s and opt for a more casual meeting at The Three Broomsticks or the Leaky Cauldron instead. Step 3: Honor Your Horoscope Now that you know what you’ll spend the day doing, don’t forget to check your Oha-Asa Horoscope. This will give you a good idea of what color robes you should wear, and your lucky item could be a bonding point or another idea of where and how to spend the day. Step 4: Palm to Palmistry As you enjoy the day, never forget how sensual the simple act of hand holding can be. You need not make a show of checking their heart lines or the markers of significant relationships, in fact being subtle is much more ideal. In holding hands you can note the shape of their fingertips and palms to see if their type is compatible to yours (two fire hands can make for an intense romance, but there may be lots of arguments in store). To examine the lines on their palm try tracing them with your finger playfully, and planting a soft kiss will give you a chance to look for any markings like stars on the mounds or triangles in the lines that indicate good things in store. Step 5: Enjoy Everything Remember that the future is always in motion. You may plan for as much as possible, but when the time comes, don’t be afraid of the unexpected. Sometimes we can lose ourselves in planning ahead and forget that some of the best things happen on a whim!


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ASK MADAM

Do YOU have burning questions for our resident Seer and fairy, Madam Starflash? Got yourself in a relationship with a Vampire and don’t know if it’s going to work out? Debating on using a love potion on your biggest crush? Have a bully you’d love to get rid off? Don’t hesitate to ask! Madam Starflash ALWAYS has the right answer for you! Contact her in Divination Tower at /r/TheQuibbler now with your desperate questions! 42


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k l f s d l n f l k n w e k l n f k l s e n d f n s d k l n s f k f d s n f dskfmkmksdldfdklmsklfgmkldmsklmggdkmklgm Dear Madam Starflash,

Dear Madam Starflash,

How do you know if a guy is flirting with you? There’s this guy who keeps disturbing me at work. Things like rearranging my desk when I step away for a few minutes, refilling my coffee even though I’m only halfway through my cup. I once saw him throwing out my ink and replacing it with a new one! He even emptied my trash bin and, wait for it, lined new trash bags in my favourite color! (Black, by the way.) I have questioned him about it but he denies anything is out of the ordinary. “I’m just doing my job!”, he says. But I call bovine discharge! Nobody pays so much attention to details without some feelings involved. What should I do?

HELP! A while back a friend found my old copy of "Unfogging the Future" and we started discussing how well I did in Divination. Word quickly spread, and now I can't have anyone over for a cup of tea without being accosted about reading their tea leaves! I even tried a false prediction with one friend that asking again would lead to danger. Much to my annoyance she asked the very next time I visited her, and then broke her leg tripping over her cat to bring me her empty cup! How can I get everyone to understand that sometimes I just want a nice cup of tea, and I don't care how many Grims are in my cup when I'm done?

Sincerely, Confused Charity Honeywell

Sincerely, Tired of Tea Leaves

Dearest Confused,

Dearest Tired,

You are very confused, indeed. This man is your janitor. Please remember that not everything is about you.

Send these friends of yours to Divination Tower at Quibbler Castle. Madam Starflash will do their readings so you no longer have to. I promise, once they’ve come to me, they will never ask you again.

May Fortune smile upon you!

May Fortune smile upon you! Dear Madam Starflash, I’m a second year student at Hogwarts. For my Transfiguration homework, I need to write an essay on Gamp’s Law of Elemental Transfiguration. Why don’t wizards abuse the food multiplying spells? Why not go to the ice cream shop, multiply the ice cream and return the original to the shop at no costs? Thanks in advance for helping me with my homework.

Dear Madam Starflash,

Sincerely, Laid-back Larry

Dearest Currently,

What should I do if I suspect someone is attempting to Confund me? Please help! Sincerely, Currently Un-Confunded

Nice try. Madam Starflash does not do homework.

Get yourself a Shield Hat from Weasley’s Wizarding Wheezes and never take it off again. Or learn how to do a Shield Charm yourself. Either of these will be most useful while trying to fend off the Dark wizard who is currently stalking you.

May Fortune smile upon you!

May Fortune smile upon you!

Dearest Larry,

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h d j e i e u e h e h e h e h e l e l e o e k d n j e i l p j e j e j e j e j e j k l m e j e e u e h h d n d Dear Madam Starflash, I recently caught my 15 year old son smoking Gillyweed. I demanded to know where he got it from and he said his father gave it to him! My husband doesn't think it's a big deal, but I am positively outraged! What's a concerned mother to do? Sincerely, Mama Bear Dearest Mama, Try some of the Gillyweed and you will no longer be concerned about anything. May Fortune smile upon you!

Dear Madam Starflash, How do I get a wizard to take a hint? I went on a horrible date a week ago and he won't stop sending owls and showing up in my fireplace uninvited. Yesterday he popped over to my workplace with a bag of his toenails, insisting with a lecherous wink that I keep them for "potion work". Even my loud retching didn't seem to deter him! At this point should I just pack up and move to Bulgaria??? Sincerely, Seriously Creeped Out Dear Seriously, Rather than running to Bulgaria, take those toenails and use them to brew up a potion as he suggested. Try your hand at a Deterring Potion. Much like Polyjuice, it requires a bit of the person you’re attempting to Deter. Brew correctly and you’re sure to have the desired results.Three drops of fresh lemon juice will safely counteract the smell. May Fortune smile upon you!

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Dear Madam Starflash, How do I get blood stains out of dragon-hide gloves? Asking for a friend. Sincerely, My Gloves Are Clean Dearest Gloves, Tell your “friend” to try Mrs. Skower’s All-Purpose Magical Mess Remover. If that doesn’t work, have “them” try a Scouring Charm. If all else fails, throw the gloves away and get yourself “them” a nice new pair. May Fortune smile upon you!

Dear Madam Starflash, I'm reading this wonderful Muggle book, but every time I pick it up the bookmark has been moved several pages (sometimes whole chapters) ahead. Am I forgetting that I read that far ahead, am I sleep-reading, or is it something else entirely? Sincerely, A confused book enthusiast Dearest Enthusiast, That book is Hexed with a charm made to move the bookmark around specifically to annoy the reader. Sit down, finish the book in one sitting, and return it to the bookshop where you got it so it can bother someone else. May Fortune smile upon you!


DIVINATION QUIBBLER Dear Madam Starflash, Help! I accidentally ate a whole box of chocolate cheese explosions. Well, it wasn't entirely an accident. They were just so tasty. Does this excuse me from going to my great aunt Jacqueline's gnome dressing party? (Please say yes.) Sincerely, I don’t wanna go Dearest Don’t, The only way to get excused from the party is to go and get sick on the carpet. Eat another box and use Floo powder immediately afterwards. You’ll throw up on the hearth rug and be free to leave once someone Vanishes your “accident”. If you don’t have another box of chocolate cheese explosions, get yourself a Skiving Snackbox, Puking Pastilles specifically. These will have the same effect, only you will be able to heal yourself before heading back home. May Fortune smile upon you!

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A MUGGLE CHRISTMAS AND YOU Or: A Guide to a Muggle’s Christmas Film by res30stupid

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s a Muggleborn wizard, Christmas can often be an… interesting time of contrasts between the Wizarding and Muggle traditions but it isn’t because Wizards and Muggles are vastly different. In fact, the dissonance comes from how similar their traditions often are. And as someone who has experienced both, I can tell you just how similar they can be. It often boils down to a similar schedule; wake up in the morning and open presents, have a large lunch with a goose, turkey or other customary main meat and a large selection of veggies, top it off with sweets, puddings and booze for the adults and simply melt away into a gorgeinduced coma as the children run about and play. But often, my pureblood and half-blood friends ask, “But what do Muggles even do at Christmas?! Tell stories? Play games?” And yes, we do that and all. But we also happen to do something else; We watch Christmas movies. Now, there is a very good question that comes up after this; “What makes something a Christmas movie?” And the answer to that is both pretty simple and also… surprisingly complex. People often think that a Christmas movie is a story set around Christmas, which is a form of requirement, but it isn’t a standard. Normally, a story is often suitable for Christmas if it has some of the following trends; The story is set before, during or after Christmas or otherwise in the season of Winter A common theme happens to be family coming together in a difficult time The value of close emotional bonds over material goods and;

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Otherwise just being good, heartwarming and a real treat to sit back and watch. So, I’ll take this time to recommend a number of Christmas films that you can sit back and enjoy. You’ll often buy these at or around Christmas or available for purchase to watch at home on a television set if you have one.

A Christmas Carol A Christmas Carol, In Prose, Being a Ghost Story of Christmas, was originally written by Charles Dickens in 1843 and is considered the quintessential tale to tell during the holidays. In fact, it’s popularity is considered by many to be the reason why Christmas is celebrated as openly as it is in Britain at all! Given the fact the story is in the public domain (meaning the story is free for anyone to tell or publish in their own way), there are literally hundreds of versions of this story, most of them being adaptations for the screen. The story is about a cruel and miserly moneylender known as Ebenezer Scrooge who is haunted by the ghost of recently parted business partner, Jacob Marley. Marley, as cruel and wicked as Scrooge was in life, is condemned to an eternity of pain and misery due to his actions in life and, in hoping to spare Scrooge of the same fate, arranges for Ebenezer to be haunted by three spirits on Christmas Eve, each representing his past, present and future in order to make him see the error of his ways and to change the course of fate before Ebenezer is himself doomed. This is actually a fairly interesting concept of a story; it takes a character who the author of any other tale would make the villain and shows what hardships made him the man he is today, as


ENTERTAINMENT QUIBBLER well as the reaction to learning how others feel about him. You start hating him but, if the movie ends up doing its job properly then you’ll feel sympathy for Scrooge and hope that he ends up changing. Like I said, there are different versions of this story, all told in their own way. For some of the most authentic retellings, my recommendation happens to be either the version released in 2009, starring Jim Carrey as Ebenezer Scrooge or, for a more humorous bend, the Muppet’s Christmas Carol where most of the cast is played by an ensemble of puppets; the latter happens to be one of my favorite versions. If you’d like an animated version which is more appropriate for children, then Mickey’s Christmas Carol is the version to watch. For a movie that happens to be an utterly different take, then I’d recommend Scrooged (1988), the story of a cynical television executive who is trying to put on a production of A Christmas Carol that is quickly taking a turn for the worst, both because of the demands of his bosses, but also because the Three Ghosts happen to be haunting him now as well...

a young boy moves into the old house of the boy from the first and finds the items the first boy used to make the Snowman. But he doesn’t just stop there… As a tradition, you’ll often catch these movies on Channel 4 on either Christmas Eve, Christmas Day or both. And fair warning to parents… you’ll need a box of tissues ready for this one. There’s also another movie in the series called Father Christmas which shows what Santa Claus is doing on the other 364 days of the year. While not as popular as the other films, it is an enjoyable watch (and after The Snowman, I actually recommend it since it may stop the kids from crying).

The Santa Clause (1994)

The Santa Clause is a festive comedy film starring Tim Allen as Scott Calvin, a divorced businessman who is estranged from his ex-wife and is struggling to emotionally connect with his young son who he is taking care of on Christmas Eve. That is, however, until he accidentally kills Father Christmas by frightening him off the roof and is forced to take the The Snowman (1982) and The Snowman man’s job according to the titular contract. No, really. That is the actual plot. This and the Snowdog (2012) isn’t written by George Weasley as an elaborate practical joke like last time, I assure you. The Snowman is a graphic comic utterly devoid Over the following year since the accident, of words, and the same is true of this adaptation produced by Channel 4 which tells its story entirely Scott slowly begins to change from a slim, somewhat reserved businessman into a fat and by sight and a musical score. jolly figure who grows into his responsibilities The short adaptation (only twenty-four and also ends up reconnecting with his young son, minutes long) begins with either the author of the while also being guided by one of the elves working original graphic novel or famed musician David Bowie (depending on the version) starting the story in the North Pole and also his own son into being a in an attic after finding an old scarf. The story, told of kinder, gentler man. the narrator’s childhood, follows his misadventures after a night of snow when he builds a snowman. Home Alone (1990) However, late in the evening he happens to be watching when the snowman magically comes to Home Alone definitely knows a few things about life, and soon the movie becomes his interacting family; how much we care for them, how we may with the animated snowman. disagree with each other and, most importantly, This film is iconic to any Muggle or how we drive each other up the wall. Muggleborn who grew up watching it as a child. After an argument on the eve of a family In fact, the one year that Channel 4 didn’t show it festive holiday to France, Kevin McCallister wishes caused an enormous uproar in both the press and that his family would just disappear. Well, he by fans of the cartoon and its iconic song, Walking in gets his wish granted when they get on the plane the Air, became a chart-topping track when it was and, due to circumstances beyond their control, covered by Aled Jones in 1985. accidentally leave Kevin by himself in Chicago. The sequel, called The Snowman and the After his Kate realizes what has happened whilst Snowdog follows a roughly similar storyline with a on the plane to Paris, she begins a long desperate key difference - several decades after the first tale, trek to get back home to her young child. 47


QUIBBLER INSERT Meanwhile, Kevin is having the time of his life… until he realizes that he regrets his wish and wants them to return to him. During this time, he’s also forced to mature very quickly as he needs to take care of himself. Add to that a creepy neighbour that his older brother claims is a serial killer and a pair of thieves that are looking to rob his house, Kevin’s got a lot to deal with… There’s something here for the whole family; a mother wishing to reunite with her scared and lonely child, a child who just wants his family back and a lot of slapstick humor, Home Alone is easily one of my favourite Christmas movies.

Love, Actually (2003) Muggles happen to love a good, romantic storyline set around Christmas; the tale of two people coming together at Christmas time, set aside their differences and have a nice, long kiss under the mistletoe. Love Actually, a movie with an ensemble cast which follows numerous people in the lead up to Christmas as they struggle with their own feelings, takes what Muggles refer to as the “Shotgun Approach”. The entire cast is loosely related, but all have their own tales of romance and heartbreak during the Christmas season. There’s the aging rockstar who is trying to make a Christmas single to revive his career; The recently married couple who have to struggle when the bride finds out that her husband’s best man is deeply in love with her and the tension of said affection causes; A guest at said wedding who discovers his girlfriend is cheating on him with his brother so he moves to Portugal where he falls in love with his house cleaner despite neither understanding a single word of the others’ language; A business manager who hires a new secretary who comes onto him and his emotional struggles over this new affection and the long-standing relationship with his wife; Said wife’s brother who happens to be the recently elected Prime Minister of Great Britain who ends up competing for the affections of a Downing Street tea lady with the President of the United States of America while also struggling to maintain his own policies in the face of diplomatic pressure; And a family friend of said prime minister’s who is not only helping his young stepson with his first romantic crush but must mourn his wife’s death; 48

Yet another guest at the wedding who is struggling to maintain a balance of work, love and caring for her mentally ill brother; A caterer at the wedding who, without any luck in the UK, plans to leave for America in hopes of finding love in another country; And two acting doubles who are struggling to show their feelings for one another despite being rather un-shy about working together in filming some… scenes for an upcoming movie.

Gremlins (1984) Are you tired of the heartwarming, festive cheer of the other films? Then how about cleaning your palate with a nice taste of comedic horror? Then watch Gremlins! After receiving a mysterious creature as a Christmas present, a young lad is given three rules that he must always follow; never expose it to bright lights or sunlight, never feed it after dark, and never get it wet. Naturally, the rules are broken, and soon a small town is gripped by an infestation of tiny monsters who just love to cause mischief. Soon people start dying and our hero and his love interest must fight to save his town from the horde. What makes this film interesting is how it takes something nightmarish and twisted and turns it into a joke. You honestly don’t know if you should be terrified or if you should be laughing at what you see. You shouldn’t show this to younger children, but those roughly twelve and up should check it out.

Die Hard (1988) John McClane isn’t having the best of Christmases. A New York police officer, his wife has moved to Los Angeles and taken the kids as he stayed behind to work in his hometown. On Christmas Eve, he flies out to reunite with his family and meets her at the Christmas party of the company she’s working for and soon gets into an argument with her. Oh, and soon after he arrives, terrorists put the building and lockdown and take everyone in the building save John hostage, leaving him the sole person who can thwart their evil schemes. Can he rescue the hostages (including Mrs. McClean), get out of the building alive and save the day? Thus is the plot of Die Hard, a visceral and exciting action movie that is also, debatably, a Christmas film. Well… it has snow in it. You’ll


INSERT QUIBBLER be sweating throughout as it switches from an exciting action scene, tense scheming between McClane, the terrorists and the LAPD in trying to resolve the crisis and tense and heartwarming drama scenes as John makes an unusual friendship with a local police officer he’s never met before. Like a fine whiskey, this isn’t for kids but is a must-see nonetheless.

Indiana Jones Okay, this isn’t a Christmas movie but it is definitely one to watch. Or rather, a few to watch. This is a series of movies that is often shown around Christmas on BBC if you’re willing to catch them, following the adventures of a treasure hunter called Indiana Jones, who travels the world in search of ancient, lost treasures and ends up biting off more than he can chew. The first film in the series, Raiders of the Lost Ark, follows Indy as he’s tasked by the US government to investigate unusual military activities by Nazi Germany in their search for the Ark of the Covenant, the final resting place for the stone tablets said to have been given to the Prophet Noah by God himself. Ending up with an unexpected ally in an old flame, he heads for Egypt to try and secure the Ark before the Nazis can try and weaponize their biblical power. The second film, a prequel called Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, shows Indiana escaping from the peril of one adventure and into another, dragging along a streetwise youth from Hong Kong and a glamorous lounge singer on a journey to save an Indian village from both a curse as well as a mass kidnapping of children by a longthought extinct cult, searching for a blessed stone said to have been gifted by the Hindu god Shiva. The third film, a sequel to Ark called Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, follows Indy on a quest to rescue from the Nazis not only the Holy Grail, a cup said to have been held and blessed by the blood of Christ, but also his father who is the foremost expert on the Holy Grail. These movies are equally a blast and downright hilarious as you clearly see Indy is way over his head… but you’re rooting for him to pull himself out of the mess, either way.

Tokyo Godfathers (2003) On Christmas Eve, three homeless people find an abandoned baby with only clues to who the child’s parents are. Setting out on a strange quest where they end up caught between a gang war, the three strangers serve as guardians to ensure the child is kept from harm until it can be delivered to safety. Christmas isn’t a major holiday in Japan as it is in the West but that doesn’t stop this being a heartwarming, charming story of the spirit of charity that people can show to one another as well as what it means to be a good person even in times of hardship. I highly implore anyone to watch this film, even if you have to go out of your way to buy this on DVD.

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New Cards to Collect! Young witches and wizards, the wait is almost over! The latest expansion of Famous Witches and Wizards Cards will be coming soon! This announcement was kept secret until this reporter… convinced the card creators to give her entry to their business. The latest expansion will be famous Werewolves. This includes Remus Lupin, The Wagga Wagga Werewolf, Bill Weasley, Fenrir Greyback, Lycaon, Pierre Burgot, Michel Verdun, Giles Garnier (a.k.a. The Werewolf of Dole), Peter Stubbe, Thiess of Kaltenbrun, Lavender Brown, Demon Tailor, Claudia Gaillard, Michel Verdun, Philibert Montot, Pierre Bourgot, Thiess, and Jean Grenier, though there are many more labeled as potentials to be put on cards as well. Unfortunately, this reporter didn’t have time to find the names on the list of potentials as other… developments occurred. Still, this reporter was not satisfied with just the list, so she went out and asked parents and collectors. Many parents were upset that the list consisted of werewolves that wreaked havoc on the Wizarding and Muggle worlds alike. However, avid collectors all all agree that having the werewolves in their collection, good or bad, is a must! And historians agree that knowing some of the dark events in our past can help protect our future. Garius Tomkink, one such historian, said, “We can’t cover up the past just because we are ashamed of what happened. Some, like He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, should not have their own cards until old wounds have healed. But others, [such as the werewolves and] even evil wizards of eras past, should have their own cards to teach our children. Bad things happen, and we can’t change that, but we can learn [from them]. And for those children who have trouble in History of Magic class, this gives them at least a brief snippet of the history of the person on the card, and maybe even inspire other children to become historians themselves! We should never forget the past, nor should we cover it up. We need to learn from our mistakes, not try to hide them. That only invites someone to make the same mistakes [over again].” These words of inspiration moved this reporter. I, for one, am eager to collect these new cards! Time to start saving those galleons!

by Rhia1 51


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A Visit to the Wizarding Spa by Eldis_

It’s getting light later and dark earlier, the rain won’t stop pouring and the temperatures have dropped below 5 degrees Celsius: winter has arrived. Do you feel the cold all the way down to your bones? Have you already lost all sense of feeling in your toes? Do three jumpers, six scarfs and double-enchanted gloves not help to keep the cold from creeping in? Does the stress of the holiday season get to you? Go to the spa! Spa? Yes! This amazing muggle invention helps you warm up and relax. And we have good news for the wizarding community, the first big, wizard-and-witchesonly spa has just been opened in Godric’s Hollow! We had a little chat with Miranda, the owner of this beautiful place. Hello! Hi! How are you? A bit stressed, really. But I heard you can solve that? Yes! Well, not I personally, but a visit to the spa is truly very relaxing. Yes, your spa! Can you tell me a bit more about that? What kind of spell is it? Can you perform it at home? Oh, it’s not a spell! It’s a location! Wait, I have a map here. We have an extended garden where you can 52

walk through, and spread throughout the garden are different saunas with different temperatures. In our main building, we have eight different saunas and four steam rooms. We also have four swimming pools: one cold one and three heated ones, of which one is located outside. Saunas? Steam rooms? What do you mean? A sauna is a well-isolated room with a very high temperature and a low humidity. We have different rooms here ranging from 75°C, or 167°F, to 110°C, 230°F. The rooms have different themes. We have one herbs-themed, that smells delicious, and a rose-themed as well. We have two with birch wood and one where the air is a bit saltier. The steam rooms are, well, rooms filled with steam with a very high humidity. You usually can’t see that far ahead there. It’s a bit colder inside those steam rooms, about 50°C, or 122°F. That still sounds very warm. Isn’t that unhealthy? No! It’s actually very good for you. It is important to not stay the 110°C too long, of course, but it is good to sweat things out. It is also very important to properly cool down in

between saunas. Some people make the mistake to go from one sauna to the other, just to experience everything. If you do that, your body will get overheated and you will get a nasty headache. This is partly where the swimming pools are for, to help you cool down. And what do you do in these high temperatures? You just sit or lie there. In spas, you are usually supposed to be naked. However, every Tuesday here it’s swimwear day, where you have to wear a swimming suit or something similar. When you enter a sauna, you put your towel on one of the seats and sit or lie on it. And then? Just relax and enjoy the heat! That does sound amazing! How did you come up with this idea? I am a muggleborn, so I was raised in a Muggle society. My mother would take me to the spa each Christmas break when I got home from Hogwarts, and it was always so much fun! Even though you are not allowed to talk inside the saunas, to allow the other people to relax as well, it was still such a bonding experience! We talked a lot in the swimming pools and the food was always so good! So when I realised there wasn’t a 100% magical spa in England I immediately knew I had to be the first. What makes your spa different from muggle ones? First of all, we aren’t depending on what muggles call ‘electricity’ to warm our spas. The rooms are enchanted to constantly stay


QUIBBLER INSERT the temperature I want them to be, and they are magically isolated to not let in any of the outside cold. Our cooks in the restaurant magically prepare the food, and all facilities are also cleaned by magic. And we offer other services as well! We have a very talented crew who can give you magical massages, we have some a very good skincare witch who can help you get rid of all of your spots and we have a bunch of magical scrubs freely available. The towels we rent out are self-cleaning, self-drying and self-heating. We have a deal with the gnomes in the garden to keep the place looking fresh and neat. That sounds great. I’d love to try it! Well, did you bring your swimming suit like I asked you to?

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PRESENT THIS ARTICLE AT THE FRONT DESK FOR 50% OFF YOUR FIRST VISIT!

Yes, I did. Great! It’s Tuesday, so it’s swimwear day. Here’s your entree ticket, enjoy! And enjoying myself I definitely did. The saunas and steam baths warmed me to the bone, and my muscles haven’t been this relaxed ever since I started working for the Quibbler. What a treat! And, if you bring this article with you to Miranda’s Magical Spa you get 50% off your entry fee! Now you only need to figure out an excuse to tell your boss why you need to have a free day every Tuesday…

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CERTAIN RESTRICTIONS MAY APPLY AUTOMATIC GRATUITY APPLIED TO PRE-DISCOUNT PRICE CAN NOT BE COMBINED WITH ADDITIONAL COUPONS ONLY VALID AT OUR HOGSMEADE LOCATION

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QUIBBLER ENTERTAINMENT

12 Days of Quibblemass by ElphabaPfenix

On the twelfth day of Quibblemass My /u/im_finally_free sent to me Twelve Wrackspurts piddling Eleven Dragons dragging Ten BilliWig wigging Nine Bowtruckle dancing Eight Fairies prancing Seven kappa a-swimming Six Moke a-laying Five Golden Snitch Four Doxy Three Kneazles Two Thunderbirds, and A Phoenix in a Wand tree

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Would You Rather...?

The days are getting shorter and the nights are getting colder. You can feel yourself getting more and more bored because you can’t appreciate the great outdoors when the sun sets so early. What ever will you do on these cold winter days when you are trapped indoors? Why don’t you gather round some friends and sit by the fire and play this winterthemed version of would you rather!

Would you rather: Build a snowman or an igloo? Have classes canceled for snow but it’s too cold to enjoy it, or still have classes but be able to go outside after? Be snowed in or be caught outside in a blizzard? Go ice skating or sledding? Drink hot chocolate or tea? Cuddle by the fire or crawl under the covers? Wear too many layers and be hot or not enough and be freezing? Have to clear the snow without magic or jump in the lake? Be hit on the head with an icicle or hit in the face with a snowball? Get your tongue stuck to a pole or slip and fall on ice? Get frostbite on your fingers or your toes? Appreciate the snow or pray for it to be summer already

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Riddle:

The Other Three Brothers Three brothers share a family sport: A non-stop marathon The oldest one is fat and short And trudges slowly on The middle brother's tall and slim And keeps a steady pace The youngest runs just like the wind, Speeding through the race "He's young in years, we let him run," The other brothers say "'Cause though he's surely number one, He's second, in a way."

(Answer: hands on a clock) 56


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The Source of Magic By imprimis5

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W

e are surrounded by and immersed in magic every day of our lives. Why, just this morning, I cast no fewer than a dozen spells before leaving my home, not to mention petting my crup and taking a trip by Floo Powder. Magic is such an integral part of our lives that we can begin to take it for granted. But where does it come from? From whence does it draw its power? The search for the source of magical energy is one that has consumed many great witches and wizards through the ages. Alas, we have very few solid answers to these questions. I hope to give you a primer, as it were, to some of the prevailing theories of the day. Perhaps, with this knowledge, you can take up the search yourself ! First of all, let us talk about the nature of magic. Magic seems to be an intrinsic energy field that we tap into when we cast our spells, while simultaneously being something that actually infuses our (and other magical beings’) very bodies. Spells are a way of directing that energy into a useable form. We do this through thought, word, and action; the spell is conceived by our thoughts, spoken by our words (aloud or otherwise), and formed by the motion of our wands. Nonverbal spells are troublesome in that they blur the lines between the conception and spoken stages of spellcasting. Indeed, there are many who would say that the words of a spell are less important than the idea of the spell. For example, there is no evidence suggesting that the actual magic used by house elves is any different from that used by the cleaning wizard that comes to empty your dustbins. However, they are conducted in very different manners. The snap of a house elf ’s fingers as compared to the casting of Scourgify achieve the same results in the direction of magical energies. And please, spare me your tender wizarding sensibilities in regards to a house elf tapping into the same fundamental power of the universe as a witch of status; power cares naught for the user.

EDUCATION QUIBBLER but I tend to find it a bit too vague for my liking. It is much like asking “Why does humankind exist now?” and getting the answer “Because it used to.” I am in search of a more practical answer. Empedocles, in his 450-B.C. work “Magikós,” records some of the earliest-known thoughts on this subject. In his words, “[...] the light from the moon upon conjunction with a storm at night powers many great works.” This is in keeping with mystical belief at that point in history, and it is hard to say whether it influenced or was influenced by the wider beliefs of the day. Grand Sorcerer Podrick Batworthy earned his Order of Merlin with the now-famous text Charmes Without Worde. As you are no doubt aware, this is the founding codification of non-verbal spells. Before Batworthy, non-verbal spells were accomplished either by accident or by very specific mental training. However, Batworthy dedicated most of his life to making non-verbal spells available to and achievable by all. In this tome, he explores the idea that the practical energy for magic comes from the witch or wizard themself, in the form of emotion. He cites the production of a Patronus charm and its requirement of happiness in its purest form as evidence that magic is internally powered. In a later (and perhaps apocryphal) work attributed to Batworthy, the Unforgivable Curses are also cited as further evidence. It is unlikely that he would have performed the necessary research in order to write this, however, given his draconian views on punishment for wizards who used these curses. The prevailing view in most circles is that “Well, magic is magic,” followed by a dismissive wave of the hand. This implies that we should not bother questioning any of it, as it is beyond our puny mortal logic. I refuse to accept this, myself, and will continue my research. I urge you to do the same. As many Hogwarts students have taken to writing in their leaving books, “Race you to a Chocolate Frog card!”

All of this is, and we have yet to answer our original question: from where does magic originate and what is its power source? On the origin of magic, the great Merlin himself proposed that magic is the echo of the power that knit our very universe together in the primal ages. This would seem to be an unassailable position, 59


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R

ecent magic from Mountain Bird Wand Shop, published in the manual “How to make a Butterfly Blush: Spells and Such from Mountain Bird Wand Shop.” Every Mountain Bird spell, potion, and incantation is guaranteed to work. If executed properly! A spell to find a sock that was lost somewhere in the laundry. It happens to us all, doesn’t it? Our socks go straight from our feet into our laundry hamper. Or maybe on the floor next to the hamper, at least. Or perhaps we were so tired that we went to bed with them on and tugged them off in the middle of the night just after dreaming about eating great quantities of cotton candy. Is it any wonder that many socks are also made of cotton? At any rate they find their way to the hamper. And then to the washing machine, and drying machine, and finally into a basket. Quite a journey, really, from the point of view of the sock. Have you ever imagined what it is like to be a sock? If not, you are really missing out. And when everything is pulled out of the dryer, crisp and clean and warm and bright, comes one of the joys of all of our weeks: folding laundry. First the big, flat, easy things to fold like dish towels and fancy napkins. And then the complicated things to fold such as octopus pajamas and 60

long underwear with Velcro fasteners. And then things that are impossible to fold neatly, like fitted sheets. And we are left with a pile of socks, which we match diligently, finding the perfect mate for each in accordance with its color, size, shape, and number of years of service. Until . . . there is one left without a match! And there is a perfect spell to retrieve the missing sock. A very useful spell indeed. The problem is, all of us here have quite forgotten it. We had it written down on a piece of paper which we simply cannot find at the moment. We’ll let you know as soon as we do. It must be around here somewhere.

Vegitalios deliciousos: a potion to make peas and spinach taste like chocolate Peas and spinach: those cute little bursts of flavor that brighten up any meal, brighten your day and brighten your smile. We love them we adore them all of us at Mountain Bird Wand Shop eat 51 peas and 52 spinach each day. (But be careful that you don’t get spinach stuck between your teeth

at a wedding dinner – eww gross!) We have been told, however, that there are some people who don’t like to eat these most healthy of foods. What a shame! In case you are one of those most unfortunate of souls, here is a potion that will help you tolerate the intolerable. First, walk to your garden and gather three peas and three leaves of spinach. Place them into a very large blender (you will understand soon why it needs to be very large). Add a pinch of salt and black pepper. And then just a scooch of purple pepper. Add one tablespoon of milk if you are in the mood for that kind of thing. Maybe an olive. A caper or two would not be amiss, just be careful that you don’t knock anything over while you are capering. Start the blender on low. How long do you sleep, by the way? At least eight hours or so, we hope. Let the blender blend for as many hours as you usually sleep. Don’t worry if it keeps anyone else awake, this is an important potion for your health! Set a timer, just in case. Be warned that the blender might overheat after a few hours. If it does, find another blender and start over again. When exactly three minutes and 90 seconds are left on the timer, add 14 gallons of liquid chocolate, and turn the blender to high. When the three minutes and 90 seconds are over, the potion will be complete, and you can eat the peas and spinach and we guarantee that they will taste just like chocolate!


EDUCATION QUIBBLER

Grossisimot maximus: Lepidoptera a potion to gross Rubinicus: A spell to someone out make a butterfly blush You must begin by not showering or bathing for at least four days and five hours, and not brushing your teeth for at least 125 hours. Also, eat a lot of gross food for 4.48 days. Try to think gross thoughts for 1.23 percent of a year, 14.94 percent of a month, and 64 percent of a week. We know those are a lot of numbers, but it’s important to keep them all straight if this potion is going to work. Get a big pan from the kitchen and rub your bare feet all over it, especially on the inside. Sneeze into it and add one cup of dead bugs or insects (any kind of bugs or insects will do, but spiders will work the best). Fill it to the top with spoiled milk and throw two and a half very old eggs against the side of the pan. Turn the heat to medium and stir with your wand in a clockwise direction. Wipe the wand under your left armpit every three and a third minutes. Keep sneezing into the pan as you stir. Burp as much as you can as well, directly into the potion. Just as it begins to boil over onto the stove, add fourteen hairs you have collected from the bathtub drain, stick your wand up your left nostril and then . . . EWWW gross! Why would you even read this far into this potion! What is wrong with you?!

Embarrassing things, they happen to us all. And we sometimes have embarrassing secrets we would like to share with someone else. Why not share them with a butterfly? They are quite good at keeping secrets, you know. We have certainly never had a butterfly tell us a secret it heard from anyone else. Have you? First make friends with a butterfly. They can be found and are often available during the summer in many parks, yards, botanical gardens, or most other locations outside. Outside is almost always better than inside, don’t you think? We have yet to meet a butterfly who preferred to be inside, anyway, and that should tell you something. Wait until the butterfly has folded its wings in an upward position for at least three seconds (that means it’s listening). Hold your wand behind your back where the butterfly can’t see it, and recite the spell “lepidoptera oculatum” (pronounced lepi-DA-ptera occu-LA-tum). Very carefully whisper to the butterfly your most embarrassing secret. You must then look away until it moves its wings again. You won’t be able to see this, of course, but we guarantee that the butterfly will be blushing. Do you know what else happens when you’re looking away? We don’t either!

Lacti Schnoz: A spell to make a friend laugh so hard that milk comes out of their nose Remember that Mountain Bird wands simply do not work for spells cast with evil intent, but who doesn’t enjoy a good laugh from time-to-time? Or to laugh so hard that milk actually comes out of your nose? Fun times lost are fun times never had and fun times never had are fun times lost. All of us at Mountain Bird wand shop hope that you quite often have fun times. To cast this spell it is best if you and a friend are drinking milk together. It can even be chocolate milk. The spell must be timed almost perfectly for it to work. You must cast it right as your friend is taking a big drink of milk and immediately after you have told the punch-line of a very funny joke. At that exact moment you point your wand at them in the way that you find the very funniest and recite “Lacti Schnoz” (Pronounced LAK-tee SCHNOZ!) If the spell is cast correctly they are sure to laugh so hard that milk comes out of their nose. But it must be a very funny joke that you have told. Like the one about the star-crossed lovers and the nargle. Or the joke about the politician and the wrackspurt. That one is particularly funny. Especially because it’s true. It is a well-known fact that politicians commonly harbor wrackspurts. What is less well-known is that they are the breeding-grounds for such creatures. At Mountain Bird wand shop we believe that they are not entirely useless, however. Wrackspurts, that is. 61


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Endorsements of Mountain Bird wands from Extremely Famous Witches and Wizards and such: “I recommend Mountain Bird wands to all students of magic. Especially those who do not wish to receive very poor grades.” - A very famous headmaster of a certain school of witchcraft and wizardry. “My very first wand was a Mountain Bird. I still use one and I highly recommend them for transfiguration. Particularly if you don’t want to accidentally turn yourself into a newt!” – A well-respected teacher of transfiguration. “If you insist on silly wand-waving over the exact art and subtle science that is potions making, I suppose a Mountain Bird wand would not be the worst choice.” – A certain teacher of potions. “Mountain Bird wands are wonderful an’ powerful! Why I still have a bit ‘o mine in my . . . oops, I shouldn’t ‘a said that. I should not ha’ said that.” - A beloved care of magical creatures teacher. “To tell the truth I don’t use a wand for my magic. But if I did, I’m sure it would be a Mountain Bird wand!” - Queen Elsa of Arendelle. “Why are you even asking me for an endorsement? I’m a Jedi, not a Wizard!” – Luke Skywalker.

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Steady Strolling:

A Sincere Story about Serena Snow’s Simply Stunning Slip-Free Shoes

t is far too often that I end up lying in the snow or ice, once again betrayed by my shoes. I put my foot down firmly on the ground, commanding it to remain in place, only to have it slide out from under me yet again. If you’re anything like me, a simple winter wonderland walk can turn into a warzone, each step a battle to reach my destination. Over time, I consigned myself to this fate, finding no footwear that could prevent me from repeatedly faceplanting during the winter months.

by GreenFrogs95

I finished up my shopping, managing only to fall once more before heading home. Upon arrival, I rushed to open the box of my new and exciting shoes. Inside the box was an informative product information card that read:

Recently, I was doing some shopping in Diagon Alley. It was a cold day and unfortunately, the cobblestones were icy. As per usual, I found myself unsuccessfully flailing about in an attempt to avoid falling. As I lost my balance and was bracing for impact, my eyes caught a brightly colored poster in the window of Madam Malkin’s. Time seemed to slow as I read, “Serena Snow’s Slip-Free Shoes: Never Slip on Ice or Snow Again! Get your money back if you slip on ice or snow while wearing these shoes within 1 year of purchase!”

Thank you for buying Serena Snow’s Slip-Free Shoes! This is the latest miracle product released by talented magical inventor Serena Snow, whose other products include Serena Snow’s Self-Sustaining Scrapbook, Serena Snow’s Self-Confidence Strengthener, Serena Snow’s SoulMate Spotter, and many more! Serena made these sensational shoes to aid your ability to walk in the snow or ice by preventing you from slipping. To make these shoes even more sublime, Serena has given them customizable appearance options! See the back of this card for the command words to alter your shoes into one of 18 different shoe styles or 10 different colors! We 100% guarantee that these shoes will prevent you from slipping on snow or ice or you get your money back (within 1 year of purchase).

As I made contact with the ground, I thought I could hear a choir of phoenixes, bolstering the growing feeling of hope within me. Looking back, I may have hit my head on the cobbles too hard, but nevertheless, I was encouraged to embark on a slipfree journey. I marched, nay, crawled straight into Madam Malkin’s. Once on the ice-free ground, I picked myself up and immediately purchased a pair of these wondrous shoes. Madam Malkin, a lovely woman, had seen my tumble outside and gave me a discount, stating, “It seems like you need these.”

I flipped over the card and there were indeed many customization options! All it required was simply tapping your wand on the shoe and saying a certain command word to alter their appearance. Style options for the shoes include sneakers/ trainers, hiking boots, combat boots, snow boots, ankle boots, mid-calf boots, knee high boots, Mary Janes, court shoes/pumps, kitten heels, oxford shoes, ballet flats, boat shoes, clogs, loafers, moccasins, and sandals. Color options include black, brown, gray, white, red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple.

Although these shoes seemed very promising, a test run was in order. I tried out some of the customization options and they all seemed to work well. I settled on black ankle boots and bundled up for a stroll. I opened my door and cautiously stepped onto my icy porch. Lo and behold, my feet stayed where I had placed them! Another few steps forward and still, no slipping! I was so taken with the sweet joy of stability, that I burst into a full sprint. Now, for full disclosure, I did stumble and fall. However, this was not due to the winter weather conditions, but instead due to a dead log that I failed to notice in my gleeful gallop. Once I ran out of energy, I returned to a normal pace. On the entire duration of my walk, there was no ice or snow induced slipping, which is an absolute miracle. In an effort to find out how the shoes worked, I spent some time hunched over, peering at the shoes upon each step. As far as I can tell, it seems as if the shoes prevent water from ice or snow from pooling under the them. Maybe some version of a Tergeo charm to siphon away liquid from under the shoes? Regardless of the magic used, these shoes are marvelous. Serena Snow’s Slip-Free Shoes are a must-buy this winter season. Not only are they fully customizable, they are also incredibly effective. I have thoroughly enjoyed all of Serena Snow’s products, but this one may just be her magnum opus. Slip and slide to your local wizard wear store today to pick up a pair of these simply stunning shoes!

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The Kraken Wand by AWandMaker

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acquotte Delahaye stood at the crossroads of two worlds, for she was both a witch and a pirate. Born on Haiti, she was sent to school at Castelobruxo, in Brazil. She soon found that traditional education didn’t suit her and she left after only four years to make her own way. She liked the idea of traveling the seas and after a quick duel with some very unprepared "gentlemen" she took control of their sloop. Many of the original crew, having seen how formidable she was, stayed on. Piracy was an easy way for them to make ends meet since merchant ships had no defense against even a partially trained witch, and with the aid of a good memory charm none of the victims could remember who attacked them in the first place. She and her crew became well known in the pirate community, for they are the only crew known to have survived being attacked by a kraken without losing their ship. Kraken attacks aren’t common, but until this point had only been recounted by survivors who had washed to shore amongst the flotsam of their ravaged vessel. While a kraken’s thick skin and unusual physiology make it impervious to magical attack, this particular Kraken

INSERT QUIBBLER hadn’t anticipated the bite of Jacquotte’s goblin made rapier. Few goblin blades had made it to the new world at this point in time. This one having been stolen from a very wealthy individual who was moving from England to open plantations on the Caribbean islands. Their demand grew substantially among seafarers after tales of Jacquotte’s victory spread. Having lost her wand to Davy Jones’s Locker during the battle, she fashioned a new wand from the severed tentacle of the kraken and a piece of driftwood that she thought represented her gowhere-the-sea-takes-you attitude. She found the Kraken core to be a great dueling wand, preferring to unleash huge bursts of overwhelming power very quickly, but then turning more to defense after the initial onset. Not very good at subtle casting or monotonous tasks it fit her personality perfectly. Decorated with a small rose gold figure of the kraken and a handle sculpted in the form of a tentacle, this wand went on to become one of the most feared weapons in the Caribbean.

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QUIBBLER CRAFTS, BREWS, AND HOBBIES

Winter is the perfect time for warm drinks! If you can’t get your hands on some butterbeer, give this hot chocolate recipe a try.

Ingredients

1 cup milk 1 - 1 ½ tbsp. cocoa powder 2 - 3 tsp. sugar depending on your taste ¼ tsp. vanilla extract Pinch of Salt Optional: ¼ tsp. cinnamon Optional: whipped cream

Instructions

Pour about ¼ cup of the milk into a cooking pot or saucepan. Add the cocoa powder, sugar, salt, and cinnamon, if desired. Place the pot on a stove burner and turn the heat to medium-high. Whisk together the ingredients until there are no clumps. Do not let the mixture bubble or boil. Once combined, add the remaining milk and whisk to combine. Add the vanilla extract and continue mixing. Heat until the mixture is steaming, but not bubbling or boiling. Pour into a mug and top with whipped cream if desired. Enjoy! 66


CRAFTS, BREWS, AND HOBBIES QUIBBLER

Have the easiest holiday ever! With Christmas fast approaching, we are all preparing for the festive season. Here is a few quick spell and tips to lighten the holiday workload!

1. Tired of winterizing your boats or broom? Just use the Undetectable Extension Charm on a suitcase and store your mode of transport in a bag! Keep your bag in your home. Now you only have to worry about keeping your home warm and minimize the risk of property damage during the winter! 2. Is slaving over a Christmas meal for the entire day sounding exhausting? Try food services like Doxi-livery or Golden Snack-get to deliver a full feast to your home. Just choose your menu in advance and send an owl to them with payment. 3. A simple cleaning tip not used by wizards and witches is Accio. After the feast, just cast Accio trash and all things considered, all trash will be summoned. Just remember to standby with a trash bag to collect them as the fly towards you! Get a niffler on standby to search your trash for any stray valuables caught in the summons before you Vanish the trash. 4. Instead of preparing 5 different pies for dessert, why not do a big piece with 5 different fillings inside separated by segments. The flavour combination might turn out interesting and instead of baking 5 times, you do a larger pie and bake once! So simple! 5. Worried about the Floo Network jamming up during the holidays, the owl post being lost, or Portkeys getting mixed up and taking your family to the wrong location? Plan early and arrive a few days before the Christmas rush. Alternatively, rent out the Knight Bus and pick up your family in a single day! 6. It is actually more economical to celebrate Christmas and New Year's Day at the same time. Plan your feast between those two holidays and save on having to cook 2 meals. It just makes so much sense! 7. Worried about pests? Refer to our Summer 2018 Issue (No. 34852) of the Quibbler “10 Ways to Keep Pests Out of Your Kitchen�, pg. 88-92, to keep your kitchen pest-free and safeguard your goodies.

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HOGWARTS HORROR-SCOPES Madam Starflash Sees what (mis)fortunes will befall you this season! CAPRICORN THE THESTRAL

TAURUS THE WEREWOLF

VIRGO THE UNICORN

(DEC. 22ND — JAN. 19TH)

(APRIL 20TH — MAY 20TH)

(AUGUST 23RD — SEPT. 22ND)

I'm sorry for the loss of your beloved Crup. Your elderly neighbors know, and will be visiting you in the next few weeks. When they invite you over, accept the invitation. They will be a comfort to you in the next few months.

You will be forced to sit through a holiday concert by a banshee impersonating Celestina Warbeck. Bring your earplugs and remember that when performing a Silencing Charm, it’s a sharp jabbing motion with your wand.

Double-check your cauldron before beginning your next potion. Your roommate hung fluxweed above the cauldron three days ago and some of it landed in the cauldron.

AQUARIUS THE KELPIE

GEMINI THE VEELA

(JAN. 20TH — FEB. 18TH)

(MAY 21ST — JUNE 20TH)

Get that toilet fixed soon. The gnomes in your basement are noticing the leaking and are the reason why you can't always find your kitchen knives

You will find yourself in the lair of a very unfriendly Peruvian Vipertooth who has not eaten in five days. Make sure you have your aunt’s fruitcake with you; it’s the only thing that will get you out unscathed.

PISCES THE MERMAN (FEB.19TH — MARCH 20TH) DO NOT BREW HEADACHE-RELIEVING POTION IN THE NEXT THREE MONTHS. If you do, you will have a very time consuming family trip to St. Mungo's.

ARIES THE HIPPOGRIFF (MARCH 21ST — APRIL19TH) On your next trip to Diagon Alley, buy a butterbeer for the witch in St. Mungo’s Healer’s robes at the Leaky Cauldron counter. You will find that you both have a lot in common.

68

CANCER THE FIRECRAB

LIBRA THE DRAGON (SEPT. 23RD — OCT. 22ND) Buy as many sugar quills as you can the next time you visit Honeydukes. This is the last time they will ever sell them!

SCORPIO THE VAMPIRE (OCT. 23RD — NOV. 21ST)

Your younger cousins are bringing Decoy Detonators to that family dinner in two weeks. Your extra large stash of Skiving Snackboxes Your dreams will finally come true this holiday is going to come in handy. Take some Fever season. Unfortunately, it’s the dream you Fudge before supper and avoid the noise. had of being eaten by a giant marshmallow. Incendio will get you out; just be prepared to have s’mores at every meal until Valentine’s SAGITTARIUS Day. (JUNE 21ST — JULY 22ND)

THE CENTAUR

(NOV. 22ND — DEC. 21ST)

LEO THE SPHINX (JULY 23RD — AUGUST 22ND) Beware the charming blond man you will meet in the New Year. His charisma is the result of his Veela ancestors. He is up to something devious and cannot be trusted.

Your nosy Muggle neighbors will be especially inquisitive this winter. Be prepared to explain (or Obliviate) away why your "Santa elf statues" are square dancing every night.


WANTED

Volunteers wanted! A couple of wizards gathered to organize a ~spooky~ autumn fair and are looking for a few others to help set things up. You can meet us in front of The Leaky Cauldron every Thursday at 6PM sharp. Bring snacks if you can. Wanted: A willing witch or wizard to dress up as a pymgy puff and eat my bogies as I sleep. PURELY PLATONIC. NO WEIRDOS.

REAL ESTATE For Sale: a 100% ghost-free house in the quiet, idyllic village of Ives Brook. Rumours of a wailing ghost with an axe buried in its back are untrue and false. The two-storey house has a lovely view of a babbling brook, and is accompanied by a large backyard with white picket fencing. It has 3 bedrooms and two bathrooms, as well as a garage to hold your vehicles and broomsticks and a potion-making study. Auction is on December 11 at 2 Polte Drive, Ives Brook. For rent: One bedroom, one bathroom apartment located in the junk drawer just off of the main kitchen. Great location within walking distance to my collection of soy sauce packets and rubber bands. NO SMOKING. NO PETS. Credit check required.

FREE & FOR SALE After a visit to my cousin's farm, I was sent home with one too many pumpkins, so I'm giving some away! Just send an owl to Aurora Screep, or come find me at Madam Malkin's on Monday or Friday morning, and we'll hash out the details.

Teleporting sofa cushion for sale.1,5 galleon. Transports wizards and witches to random places. Serious inquiries only. For Sale: Crup Puppies! Litter has 3 boys and 2 girls. All are up to date on potions. Must have license to purchase. Floo "Cooper's Cruppies" for more info. For Sale: wand. 11.5 inch, berch, unicorn core. Belonged to my grandmother who has dementia now. Good quality, bids starting at 5 galleons. Contact Euduard Basnik, serious offers only.

BUSINESS & OFFERS Need help removing pixies from your chimneys this winter? Owl PixieDusters Inc. First 5 inquiries gets a 50% discount. Florean Fortescue's is proud to announce a NEW FLAVOR! Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Cones! Each lick is guaranteed to have a unique flavor! Come by and try it today! I need someone willing to vouch they saw me do Very Important Journalistic Stuff last Tuesday instead of relaxing in the spa.If you tell my boss you saw me doing Very Useful And Professional Things you'll get a year long subscription to the Quibbler for free. Thanks.

Lost Wand: Last seen on Diagon Ally somewhere in between The Storm Crow Inn and The Leaky Cauldron on September 9th while celebrating a Chudley Cannons victory. Wand in question is made out of cherry wood 10 inches long and is somewhat rigid with a unicorn tail hair core. If found, please contact the proprietor of the Storm Crow Inn.

MISSING: A shipment of the newest edition of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them has gone missing. It was due to the Quibbler offices last Tuesday and was last seen last Sunday leaving Flourish & Blotts. I have notified the shipping department, but I’d like to know if anyone else has any information. Please owl the Quibbler Archivist if you do.

Eldis_ DarkBlonde4 wiksry l-ily CherokeePurple KackelDackel WitchUnicorn

NOW HIRING! Penny's Plumerie is now looking for clerks for the upcoming holiday season. Competitive pay and possibility of long term arrangement! Send Owl to Mr. Plum for more information. Diagon Alley location only.

SALE: Loren Trines' Magical Cuddly Toys is having her annual winter sale! Up to 40% off of homemade toy stuffed hippogriffs, unicorns, and kneazles! Stop by Loren’s stall located in Diagon Alley near Flourish & Blotts!

pastelpurrfect Nellethiel

ctsFirst e p s o r P r u Reach Yo

FOUND: A stack of Transfiguration Today issues along with a stack of notes in green ink. These were lying at a window table in the Three Broomsticks. I have given them to the management for safekeeping.

Lost: A nondescript, unidentifiable object. Last seen in an unknown location in the possession of an indescribable person. Please send anyͨ̍ tips to: ͮ​ͮ ͨ ̽̉ ͮ ̅ ͤ͗ ̀ ̒ ͨ̈ͯ ͦ ̍ ͐̆ ́ ͐̽ͩ ͗͐̔ ͦ͑͂̏ ͂͑ͩ ͫ ͤ̄̅͗ ͮ ́ ̈ ̈ ͊ ́ ̐ ͌ ̕ ͛ ̀A̗̹̍ ̕ S ̷̢ ͌ ̛ F ̰͘ ͚̜̣͛͝ ̛ G̝̩ ͟ ́ T ̡ ̰​̰͈͋ ͜ ̛ f͍̱ ̓ ͜ ̵ S ͏̰͕̃͜͠ ̠̥̯͑ t͏ ̨͓̇ ̶̲ ̱̮̐ ̧̦̳̄ s̷ ̧̩̳͈͑ s͚͆͡ͅ ̨ d̦̠ ͢ k̡̀ j̱̺͘ ̪̓ ͟ h ̙ ̡ ͙̰ ̀ D ̫̼ ͎̙̝͙̺ ̥ ͈͖̭ ͚̻̟ ̦͓̬ͅ ̜̯͇̭̮ ͔͚̝ ͍̤ ͉ ͇̳̻​̻ ͖ͅ ̹͇̮̟̗ ̟̝̩̖̗ ̞ ̣ ̗ Lost: Black cat with a white spot on his left front paw. Likes to be pet. Dissapeared from Godric's Hollow. Any information would be very much appricated. We miss him. For any and all tips, contact the Rogers family.

MISSED CONNECTIONS MISSED CONNECTIONS: I saw you walking down Diagon Alley September 1st. Your blond hair glimmered in the soft breeze. You looked at me with a sneer on your face- you probably smelled my dung covered boots before gazing upon my visage. Your eyes watered and I sighed. Before I could approach you, circumstances took you away, but you looked back at me with desire evident in your face. Meet me again, and let's explore this feeling. I'll be in front of Gringotts wearing my clean boots this time. MISSED CONNECTIONS: I had dropped my work bag in the Ministry of Magic atrium last Thursday, and you stopped to help me pick up my things. I would have never gotten all those levitation reports back into my bag without your help. I never got your name afterwards, and I’d love to pay for a drink. Owl me, “Grateful Floating Envelopes”. I was the blonde girl with the Ravenclaw scarf who dropped her stack of books in Flourish & Blotts. You helped me pick them up, and commented on one of my books, telling me that it was your favourite. I wanted to tell you it was my favourite too, but your piercing blue eyes left me petrified. I'd love to get to know you better. 69


QUIBBLER INSERT

70


LAW ENFORCEMENT REPORTS The Head of Magical Law Enforcement noted that this season, incidents were few and far in between, however were very grave. Remember to stay ever vigilant and to treat fellow Muggles with compassion. MAGICAL LAW ENFORCEMENT PATROL: ◊ November 10 5:47 PM - MLE agents apprehended a group of wizards that were poaching a local unicorn herd and illegally selling unicorn blood. Poachers are in holding and are awaiting trial. Anyone who purchased the unicorn blood will be brought in for questioning and fined. Magi-zoologists are working with the unicorn herd to make sure they are healthy. ◊ December 1 5:09PM - Wizard impersonating a muggle character, “Santa Claus” is apprehended as he was flagrantly showing off his elf summoning presents, creating snow, and charming reindeer to fly. Wizard has been taken to St. Mungo’s for a mental health inquiry. All muggles have been obliviated. ◊ December 14 2:00AM - Quidditch game turns into a riot after home team loss. MLE agents apprehended over 15 inebriated witches and wizards and sent over 40 injured persons to St. Mungo’s. DEPARTMENT OF INTOXICATING SUBSTANCES:

OF

All elves are taken in for care and ringleaders of the fighting ring are in auror custody. Elves were reported as runaways or missing by their owners and these stories are under investigation.

◊ December 10 4:56PM - Reports of food poisoning are traced back to a sweets shop in Diagon Alley that was using illegal mooncalf butter in several of their recipes. The shop was immediately closed down and is pending investigation.

◊ December 9 5:47PM - Thunderbird loose in Southern California. Magi-zoologists attempted to capture the thunderbird, which caused a heavy thunderstorm that resulted in flooding.

IMPROPER USE OF MAGIC: ◊ November 25 3:45PM - Domestic dispute resulted in witch turning her husband into a turkey. Aurors arrived to find the witch plucking off the feathers. Witch was taken in for questioning and husband was returned to human state, albeit with less hair than before. ◊ December 10 5:45PM - Student attempts to transfigure his sister into a rat after a fight. Ends up as a partial transfiguration and is taken to St. Mungo’s. Student faces disciplinary action. DEPARTMENT FOR THE REGULATION AND CONTROL OF MAGICAL CREATURES: ◊ November 28 6:59PM - Underground elf fighting ring is uncovered.

◊ December 15 6:45PM - Niffler nest is found under a local muggle shop. When questioned, owner admits she has fired over 5 clerks due to missing merchandise and money. Nifflers have been safely moved to a sanctuary. DEPARTMENT OF MYSTERIES ◊ OCTOBER 21 2:22 AM; Muggle “policemen” ha ◊ OCTOBER 21 2:22 AM; Muggle “policemen”sddddddddddddddddddd ddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd dddddddd ◊ OCTOBER 21 2:22 AM; Muggle “policemen” had to be obliviated after wizar

GICAL LAW MA E EMENT * RC FO N

EPARTME * D NT

◊ November 15 7:09PM - Reports of a new substance called “twinkle dust” are under investigation. Reports of the effects of this substance include

feeling like being on a broomstick, levitating, and increased levels of acrophobia. This substance is made of pixie dust and other illegal ingredients. Individuals caught with twinkle dust will be severely fined.

N

M

The Minister of Magic and The Head of Magical Law Enforcement would like to thank the Auror Headquarters, Wizengamot Administration Services, Hit Wizards, Investigation Department, Ministry of Magic E O Witch Watchers, Office for the Detection and Confiscation DI A D I VISI of Counterfeit Defensive Spells and Protective Objects, and all others that keep our world safe. 71


CREDITS Ads

Emergency Obliviation Agency: theymightbehalfgiant Wizards Unite: Rhia1

Auror Logs Contributors: L-ily

Classifieds

Contributors: CherokeePurple DarkBlonde4 Eldis_ Im_Finally_Free KackelDackel l-ily Nellethiell pastelpurrfect Wiksry WitchUnicorn Layout: forwardtotimepast Witch Silhouette: https://vecteezy.com Vector frame (Designed by Kraphix): https://www.freepik.com/free-vector/vintagegolden-retrologos_1095157.htm'>

Cover

Layout:

KackelDackel

Crafts, Hobbies, and Brews

https://backforseconds.com/wp-content/ uploads/2017/11/Best-Homemade-Hot-ChocolateEVER-FG.jpg Layout: KackelDackel

Holiday Tips

Author: ElphabaPfenix Layout: KackelDackel

Divination

Ask Madam Starflash Contributors: DeerGreenwood KackelDackel Nellethiell pastelpurrfect

Hogwarts Horoscope Winter 2018 Author: starflashfairy

Divine Your Valentines Author: Nellethiell Illustrations: Nellethiell Layout: KackelDackel

Timing with the Centaurs Author: emilyolivia33

Photography: AWandMaker

Forest and centaur illustrations: Pottermore https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/ harrypotter/images/5/59/Forbidden_Forest.png/ revision/latest?cb=20130819184917 https://images.pottermore.com

Layout: KackelDackel

Layout: KackelDackel

History of the Kraken Wand Author: AWandMaker

Hot Chocolate

Author: GreenFrog95 Photo: Back For Seconds 72

Education

The Source of Magic Author: imprimis5


Star photo: Independent.co.uk https://static.independent.co.uk/s3fs-public/ thumbnails/image/2017/07/07/13/546856858456. jpg?w968h681 Layout: KackelDackel

How to Make a Butterfly Blush: Spells and Such from Mountain Bird Wand Shop

New Cards to Collect Author: Rhia1

Wizard card template: littlefallingstar https://www.deviantart.com/littlefallingstar Character images: Warner Bros.

Author: clorpt

Layout: KackelDackel

Butterfly illustration: OpenClipart https://openclipart.org/image/2400px/svg_ to_png/223975/Flying-Blue-Butterfly-2015073138. png

12 Days of Quibblemas

Layout: KackelDackel

Entertainment

A Guide to Muggle Christmas Films Author: res30stupid

Bow and trumpet illustration: Adobe Illustrator stock imagery Layout: KackelDackel

Would You Rather? Author: blxckfire

Background image: Lost and Taken https://storage.googleapis.com/ webdesignledger.pub.network/LaT/edd/2016/02/ grayscale-frost-texture-7-780x520.jpg Layout: KackelDackel

Riddle: The Other Three Brothers Author: WillMoff

Author: ElphabaPfenix Holly illustration: KackelDackel Layout: KackelDackel

A Visit to the Wizarding Spa Author: Eldis_

Spa coupon illustration: KackelDackel Layout: KackelDackel

Fashion

Steady Strolling: A Sincere Story About Serena Snow's Simply Stunning Slip-Free Shoes Author: GreenFrogs95

Snow shoe photo: Canadian Outdoor Equipment https://www.canadianoutdoorequipment. com/images/P/cache/huron-620x338.jpg Layout: KackelDackel

Layout: KackelDackel 73


Magical Plants and Creatures How to Take Care of Your Phoenix

Ministry of Magic to Bring Forward Election Date?

Author: DullRepresentative5

Author: ElphabaPfenix

Illustration: WDSPC

Ballot illustration: StickPNG http://www.stickpng.com/assets/ images/587387e8f3a71010b5e8ef47.png

Layout: KackelDackel

Beware the Water

Layout: KackelDackel

Author: Rhia1

You and I

Water photo: Cosmos Magazine https://cosmos-images2.imgix.net/file/spina/ photo/12769/171114-npacific-full.jpg?ixlib=rails2.1.4&auto=format&ch=Width%2CDPR&fit=max &w=835

Illustration: ElphabaPfenix

Kappa illustration: Pottemore https://images.pottermore.com Layout: KackelDackel

Profiles in Potent Potions Parts: Garlic Author: BottleOfAlkahest

Roasted garlic photo: Bon Appetit https://assets.bonappetit.com/photos/57accf9a f1c801a1038bc7ac/16:9/w_1200,c_limit/garlic-confit. jpg Layout: KackelDackel

News and Features An Ode to a Hero Author: silvertail8

Illustration: nyanSnake Layout: KackelDackel

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Author: silvertail8

Layout: KackelDackel

Ollivanders' Hunt Author: Rhia1

Shop front and interior image: Universal Studios https://www.universalstudioshollywood. com/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/2800x1197_ Potter_Ollivanders_Exterior.jpg https://orlandoinformer.com/wp-content/ uploads/photo-gallery/125/ollivanders-wand-shopwizarding-world-of-harry-potter-768-oi.jpg Layout: KackelDackel

Famous Squib, Stan Lee, Dies Author: Rhia1

Photo: https://cdn.vox-cdn. com/thumbor/9yAot9JLM_ cX6thEgvOaZIxTr7Q=/0x0:4677x3280/1200x800/ filters:focal(2346x1127:3094x1875)/cdn. vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/ image/62282455/615970090.jpg.0.jpg Layout: KackelDackel


Mystery of the Dying Christmas Tree Author: ElphabaPfenix

Tree photo: https://ask.extension.org/uploads/question/ images/attachments/000/035/463/DeadTree2_ original.jpg?1472654281 Layout: KackelDackel

Be Sure to Throw the Rubber Duck Out with the Bathwater, Ministry Warns Author: armyprivateoctopus99

Rubber duck photo: http://pngimg.com/uploads/rubber_duck/ rubber_duck_PNG5.png Layout: KackelDackel

Silver Spells: The Protectors' Protectors Author: Macallion Title illustration: Macallion Deer patronus: Pottermore https://images.pottermore.com Horse patronus: Harry Potter Wikia https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/ harrypotter/images/9/92/Horse_Patronus.png/ revision/latest?cb=20170109005249 Dementor photo: Warner Bros. https://static.magiquiz.com/wp-content/ uploads/2016/02/harry-potter-patronus-featured810x421.png Layout: KackelDackel

Travel

Muggle Candy Worth Traveling For Author: Eldis_

Ghoribas image: The Spruce Eats https://www.thespruceeats.com/thmb/ bt7uDcroeXRv_obcc3XMXznYFvI=/1605x1063/ filters:no_upscale():max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/ ghoriba-honey-1-edit-56a6445c5f9b58b7d0e0c027. jpg Krachel image: Taste of Maroc https://tasteofmaroc.com/wp-content/ uploads/2017/04/krachel1e.jpg mhalbiya: http://tastykitchen.com/recipes/wpcontent/uploads/sites/2/2011/08/Screen-Shot-201108-07-at-4.59.42-PM-410x315.png Cornes de gazelle image: 196 Flavors https://www.196flavors.com/wp-content/ uploads/2016/11/cornes-de-gazelles-kab-al-gazal-4. jpg Cinq centimes image: http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-y7sHC_JZCSs/ UF-8bfqwqhI/AAAAAAAAFi0/Hz7l3TTPrdg/s1600/ ff.JPG Coconut candy image: The Guardian https://guardian.ng/wp-content/ uploads/2017/10/Candy-Buffet-with-Nigeriancoconut-candy-e1507959785195.jpg Layout: KackelDackel Research: https://www.pottermore.com/writing-by-jk- rowling/uagadou http://trip-n-travel.com/listicle/21600/ http://www.mymoroccanfood.com/home/ merendina http://www.mymoroccanfood.com/home/ krachel-aniseed-and-sesame-seed-sweet-buns https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Libyan_cuisine https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Makroudh https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kanafeh http://www.alrahalah.com/2010/06/top-10desserts-in-egypt/ https://answersafrica.com/fascinating75


nigerian-traditional-snacks.html https://tasteofsouthsudan.com/sudanese-kahksugar-coated-cookies/ https://www.internationalcuisine.com/ liberian-milk-candy/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kuli-kuli https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ghanaian_ cuisine https://www.pulse.com.gh/lifestyle/foodtravel/ghanaian-snack-how-to-prepare-nkate-cakepeanut-brittle-id4630787.html https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Senegalese_ cuisine https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thiakry http://labelle-afrilight.blogspot.com/p/snacks. html https://www.trybbbe.com/recipe/recipes/ coconut-candy/

The Quibbler's Guide to Winter Broom Care and Safe Flying Practices Author: RealisticAppeal Background image: Lost and Taken Layout: KackelDackel

The 4-House Family Author: emilyoliva33

House crest illustrations: Scholastic https://www.scholastic.com/teachers/blogposts/ruth-manna/planning-next-year-mdashhogwarts-houses/ Layout: KackelDackel

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All Articles were Written by Quibbler Staff and Owned by Special Conspiracy Productions Productions except ones that are noted. For use of any articles in The Quibbler, Please contact Special Conspiracy Productions Copyright ©


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