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Tell us about your educational background. I’m a graduate of Fairfield University with a degree in finance and I earned my law degree from Rutgers School of Law in Newark. I’ve been certified by the Supreme Court of New Jersey as a Certified Matrimonial Law Attorney, a designation that less than one-percent of the attorney’s in New Jersey hold. What advice would you give to a couple that is considering a separation? The decision to divorce is a serious one. These days, the economics of living in New Jersey do not make for an easy go of it living apart. As an economic unit, married couples enjoy the advantages of two incomes, and shared expenses. Giving that up, for most couples, generally will mean some reduction in lifestyle. On top of that, for couples with children, divorce necessarily means losing some control over your access to your own children. There will be times when your ex-spouse has the children and you want them. How you choose to cope with that can make all the difference in how successful you are in your post-divorce life. On the other hand, I get so much out of my own marriage that it saddens me to think that some people are missing out on the joy that a healthy marriage can bring to one’s life. If your marriage is an impediment to living a fulfilling life, then you should choose happiness. What are the most common issues that couples argue over? Everyone argues, even the happily married among us. The difference is in seeing value in compromise. Marriages require regular efforts at renewal. When your partner stops caring about your happiness, arguments are more likely to end in disaster. That said, the warning signs of divorce, and the time-honored killers of relationships include persistent disagreements about money or economic contributions to the marriage, control issues, drug or alcohol abuse, and infidelity. “Divorce is the end result when life’s vagaries overcome the commitment of a party to remain married. Sometimes you have control over that decision, sometimes you don’t. I’ve seen clients move on, remarry and find happiness. So, in the end, I wish happiness for all of my clients and peace to their children,” he says. When Jay is not in the courtroom he enjoys surfing and spending time with his wife Aimee and their two daughters, Cassidy, 15 and Molly, 10. For more information, schedule an appointment with Jay Turnbach, Esq., LLC to further discuss your concerns. 732-286-4680.
Sitting on the couch ( L-R) Cassidy, age 15, Jay Turnbach, Molly, age 10. Wife, Aimee, sitting in the center. Photo By Tracy Harman Photography
The County Woman Magazine www.TheCountyWoman.com
January/February 2015