Frank M. Wanderer
The Awakening of Consciousness Adventures On The Spiritual Path
EBOOKS AVAILABLE AT AMAZON’S BOOKSTORES WWW.CONSCIOUSNESSBOOKS.CF All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronical or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrievel system, without permission writting from the publisher. Publisher / Editor: Ervin Kery (www.kery.hu, ervin.kery@gmail.com) Author: dr. Ferenc Margitics (c) Frank M. Wanderer (dr. Ferenc Margitics), Ervin Kery ( Ervin Keresztes-Kato), 2014 ISBN: 978-963-08-8481-5 ISBN-13: 978-1495200557 ISBN-10: 1495200558
We are all on a spiritual journey. This journey starts with birth and ends with death. Our life is a link between our date of birth and date of death. A link that contains all the secrets, dramas, tragedies and comedies of our lives, and we are so deeply involved in this performance that we tend to forget who we really are: the shining Consciousness. This book is about this spiritual journey.
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CONTENTS PREFACE ...........................................................................6 THE SPIRITUAL JOURNEY
7
MOTIVATIONS FOR EMBARKING ON THE JOURNEY .....7 THE SWAMP OF IDENTITIES
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THE EGO ........................................................................11 THE GAMES ROOTED IN THE DEEPEST LEVELS OF THE MIND .............................................................................15 THE TRICKS OF THE MIND REINFORCING THE EGO ..21 THE MIND-BASED SCENARIO OF OUR SPIRITUAL “DEVELOPMENT”..........................................................30 THE TRICKS OF THE SPIRITUAL EGO .................HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. IMMATURE VS. MATURE EGO ......HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. THE LAW OF ATTRACTION .. HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. THE PRISON OF THOUGHTS AND EMOTIONS HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. THE SCHOOL OF LIFE ........... HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. SELF-IMAGE, A BIT DIFFERENTLY HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. THE GREY VEIL OF THE CLOUDS OF THOUGHTS..HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING ................HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. MENTAL ALCHEMY HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK.
THE TRANSMUTATING FIRE OF FEAR AND WRATH ................................ HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. THE DOWNFALL OF VAMPIRES ....HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. THE GATES OF AWARENESS KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK.
HIBA! A
WHAT AM I DOING HERE? . HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. THE GATEWAY TO THE PRESENCE .................HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. MASTER, HELP ME!HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. YOU CAN BE A GARDENER . HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. THE AWAKENING OF THE CONSCIOUSNESS ..... HIBA! A KÖNYVJELZŐ NEM LÉTEZIK. THE AUTHOR
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Preface We are all on a spiritual journey. For everybody, this journey starts with birth and ends with death. Our life is a link between our date of birth and date of death. A link that contains all the secrets, dramas, tragedies and comedies of our lives, and we are all abandoned in this performance that we tend to forget who we are in reality. The book of our life stretches between the two end points, and this book is the chronicle of our wanderings. The track of our wanderings is defined and determined by our thoughts, ideas, desires and our willingness and readiness to meet the expectations. The story of these wanderings, this personal history may be infinitely varied at an individual level. Breaking through the different heights and abysmal depths along the route in the world of shapes and forms may provide the individual Wanderer with endless joy and immeasurable sorrow. By identifying with our personal history written in the world of shapes and forms we experience ourselves as individuals different from everybody else. Some people, a small fragment of mankind are, however, able to identify with their own respective personal histories to a lesser and lesser degree. Under certain circumstances they recognize that this Journey along the road is aimless, they are led around and around in various landscapes of the world of shapes and forms. From life to life we chase the same ideas and desires. We have recognized that we are suffering, we are suffocated in the swamp of the multitude of beliefs and ideas, and this recognition spurs us to embark on a Journey to discover ourselves.
Understanding all this is the beginning of the real JOURNEY along the road. This journey will eventually lead us out of the world of forms and shapes, back into the realm of Consciousness, free from any identification with forms and shapes. This book is about the Journey along the Road.
THE SPIRITUAL JOURNEY Motivations for Embarking on the Journey What may motivate somebody to step on the road and start a journey, to exist in the “here and now,� to leave behind and abandon thoughts and mind? There may be two reasons for someone to start the Journey. One of the reasons is real, deep suffering, when the Wanderer recognizes the source of suffering, the mind and its functions, and is willing to give up everything (including Ego) in order to escape from suffering (that is what happened, for instance, with Eckhart Tolle). The other factor leading one towards the Journey is intuitive knowledge, that is, when the individual reaches beyond mind spontaneously, without suffering, and recognizes the operating mechanisms of the human mind. That knowledge is in itself, however, not sufficient. There has to be a deep, internal attraction that draws the individual towards the Silence. Sometimes that attraction is referred to as primeval memory (that is what happened to Ramana Maharshi).
All other reasons that may urge people to start the Journey are derived from the Ego, so these are rather parts of the journey taking one around and around in the world of shapes and forms than the beginning of the real Journey. One such reson can be is “affectation.� In that case, the wanderer is attempting to escape from suffering itself, but not from its roots and reasons. For the individual, staying in the Presence only serves as a method helping them to achieve a future, better and more beautiful (that is, free of suffering) state. Another reason rooted in the mind is the endeavour to achieve spiritual development and progress. The Wanderer is looking for a method, a way that best promotes their (that is, their Ego’s) spiritual progress, through which they become a better person. The individual intends to achieve the transmutation, transformation of the Ego through the Presence. Naturally, there is a whole range of other reasons derived from the mind, but they are all characterised by the same feature: sooner or later they lead to failure. The Wanderer is unable to stay in the Presence, what is more, they are unable to recognize that the Presence is something utterly different from merely concentrating on the current moment, on the current emotions, impressions and observations (that is, naturally, impossible to sustain in the long term even with a considerable effort). These reactions are, however, not utterly useless, as the failures, experience thus gathered may ultimately increase the suffering of the individual or their intuitive knowledge, and the correct motivational base of the person concerned shall be created.
EBOOKS AVAILABLE AT AMAZON’S BOOKSTORES WWW.CONSCIOUSNESSBOOKS.CF The Last Chapter of our Personal History The last chapter of one’s personal history begins when the Wanderer becomes a spiritual seeker. As a first step of spiritual seeking the person starts to look for enlightenement, Self-recognition in the world of shapes and forms (that is, outside himself or herself) in the hope of thus reaching the state of permanent happiness.
The seeker intends to find a dogma, a great Master, an elevating spiritual experience that expands his/her Consciousness. If it is not found here on Earth, the person will be looking for it in the other world, in the heaven of a religion. The Ego uses the mind as a means of spiritual search. It is through the mind that the Ego intends to understand what is beyond mind and forms. The mind in this way prepares the mental image of enlightenment, seeking, happiness etc. The mental images are born through the comprehensive process of the mind. For comprehension, the Wanderer also requires information, so the spiritual Seeker shall gather bits of information like a busy ant. From books on religion and spirituality, lectures heard and conversations attended, the Wanderers are attempting to screen information, ideas, opinions and experience necessary for them. The same takes place with spiritual experience. The individual assumes that
if they gather a sufficient amount of experience, as a result they will reach a certain point, they will increase their spirituality. The knowledge and experience accumulated shall all form a part of the Wanderer’s spiritual Ego. These mental images motivate the Wanderer to make efforts at implementing the mental images at the level of daily life, to make these images the cornerstones of their life. Achieving spiritual objectives, however, affords only momentary satisfaction for the seeker, so after achieving one specific goal, relentlessness returns, urging the individual to start working for new objectives. The mind produces new mental images, and seeking starts all over again. In this way the last chapter of our personal history becomes longer and longer. At some people this chapter will be the most important part of personal history, until death closes the book. The First Step of the Journey Closing the last chapter of our personal history and taking the first step on the Journey will come with the recognition of the futility of spiritual seeking. The Wanderer stops and abandons spiritual seeking. The individual recognizes that all the objectives they have so far been looking for outside themselves, are only found within themselves. The Wanderer will stop when they recognize the activities of the mind and refuse to follow it any longer. The Wanderer realizes that with the help of the mind they will not be able to surpass the mind. The Wanderer will experience that stopping is the inactive moment of the mind, the silence between thoughts. In that silence, the Wanderer will experience the Consciousness without forms,
and recognize that he or she is in fact the Presence without thoughts. Starting from this internal silence, the person shall start observing the functions of their mind, and shall abandon the accumulation of spiritual teachings and the search for lofty spiritual experience. From the edge (the mind) the person will turn towards the center of his or her being (the Presence appears). That is when the Wanderer learns to use their mind appropriately. The individual will recognize that spiritual teachings are only worth as much as these are relevant to the individual’s own life. That recognition will not be a fruit of the mind’s analytical work; it is only inspired by the recognitions starting from the inner silence. These recognitions are best comparable to seeing (in several spiritual teachings these people are referred to as „Seers”) and they work like relevances. The Wanderer then leaves behind the spiritual seeker, with all the accumulated knowledge and lofty spiritual experience, and takes the first step on the Journey.
THE SWAMP OF IDENTITIES The Ego Ego The Ego accompanies the Wanderer along the first segment of the Journey. In the following we intend to discuss this, as being familiar with the functions and games of the mind with an Ego is indispensable for identifying whether we are on the right track. What is an Ego?
That is the first and foremost question. Ego is we ourselves, the person we see, think and feel ourself to be. Ego is the central figure of our personal history, based upon the past and looking into the future. Ego is the deepest dream of the Consciousness. A sign of awakening is when we realize that the state when we identify with our Ego is of very low order, very poor, and there are more significant mysteries behind our existence. How Did the Ego Emerge? At birth, we are all innocent; we do not have an Ego. Our Ego emerges as a conditioning from our parents, culture and the society we live in. Ego is the result of a cultural hypnosis, the result of a common entrancement when, as a result of our upbringing, we believe that we are what our parents, teachers, priests said we had to be. The truth is that we are the embodiment of Life, we are born into this world as a result of a miracle, and later we are lost amidst the multitude of teachings and dogmas. After identifying with our beliefs and convinctions we forget who we really are, who the person born in us into the world in order to experience existence and get acquainted with all the teachings. It is necessary that an Ego emerges in us, otherwise we would not be able to separate ourselves from our environment, our individuality would not develop, though these are important for the Consciousness in its process to wake up to itself. Ego is therefore a social product, a cultural hypnosis, programmed into us by those living around us, by telling us in our childhood who we are, what our name is, how to behave well, how to meet the expectations of others. As a result of an unconscious process, we start to identify with
this artificially created center, our mind with an Ego, that is, our Ego. The Ego is a Small Part of the Personality
EBOOKS AVAILABLE AT AMAZON’S BOOKSTORES WWW.CONSCIOUSNESSBOOKS.CF If we wish to understand how the Ego works, we must not disregard the fact that Ego is only a small part of our personality. Ego is a part of the personality, and its content comes from our sensory perceptions and memories (our life history and knowledge and experience gathered throughout our life). Ego is the thinking, feeling and sensing part. The part of our Ego we show the external world is termed by Carl G. Jung as Persona, the acting personality. That part of the Ego is foregrounded when we are in the company of other people. That is, in fact, the collection of our masks. A large part of the personality is constituted by the unconscious Ego, termed by Freud as the instinctive Ego. That is where out most basic instincts (eating, sexuality etc.) are found, and also the part of the personality described by Carl Gustav Jung as the Shadow. The ”Shadow” is shaped and developed by society, almost simultaneously with our role playing personality. Children, when they wish to meet their parents’–and through them, society’s–expectations, begin to develop these masks. These masks are like what environment shapes them to be. Rejecting certain stimuli offered by the environment triggers the disapproval of our teachers, so the intention to reject stimuli is suppressed. That is how our ”shadow-
personality� develops. It does exists within our personality, but our education relegates it into our subconscious. Freud believes that the third important component of our personality is the Superego. It comprises the social values that the culture in which we grow up finds important. In the course of a long and complicated process these values are incorporated into our personality and manifests as the ideal self (the person we would like to be). These values become integral, inner parts of the personality, and surface as opinion and convinction. The findings of psychological research suggest that more than 90% of the functions of the personality are unconscious. Large parts of the Instinct-Ego, the Persona and the Superego are unconscious. The functions of the Ego are also largely unconscious. The Ego is responsible for the integrity of the personality, for our inner well-being. This is no small task for the Ego, as it is constantly bombarded by unconscious expectations from the Instinct Ego and the Shadow, attempting to influence its behaviour. It generates anguish in the Ego (that is, in ourselves), manifested as discomfort (we do not feel all right). The Ego wishes to escape from the anguish, so it uses also subconscious mechanisms. Such a mechanism is, for instance, projection. The Ego projects the unacceptable desires and features coming from the Shadow and Instinct Ego onto others (e. g. I am not aggressive, you are aggressive). These subconscious, protective and anguish eliminating projections are the foundations of several of the mind games to be discussed later. The Womb From Which the Ego is Born: Identification The Ego develops in the course and process of identification, by our identification with our thoughts, emotions, body etc. As a result of the indetification process
we believe that here we are this Ego, this mind. In the previous chapters we saw that the mind, the Ego within it, and the things we identify with, are shaped by the society in which we live. Consequently, entirely different types of Ego have developed in various cultures in various parts of the world. In most people, the term “consciousness� identifies with that socially conditioned Ego. At a number of people this identification is so powerful that they are unaware that their life is governed by a socially conditioned mind. Those who are able to go beyond that identification with the mind recognize this state of being socially conditioned, and are also able to leave the social conditioning behind. Such a person will not identify with the mind but, increasingly, with the Consciousness (the Witnessing Presence). The Presence shall, therefore, control the mind to an increasing extent and will be manifested through the tranquilized mind.
The Games Rooted in the Deepest Leve Levels of the Mind The Ego-dominated mind plays its games in daily life, and creates the characters and scenarios necessary for the games. The content of such a scenario is determined by the individual’s environment and upbringing, that is, the culture in which we grow up. As a result, entirely different scenarios are created in the various cultures of our Earth. At the beginning of our journey, as we have seen previously, we identify with these scenarios. The scenarios provide us with the sense of a solid identity. The patterns of thoughts fixed in the scenarios are manifested in various mind games during our daily life.
In the course of our journey leading to Consciousness, our objective should not be creating a positive character, and thus a pleasant scenario, but finding the Existence behind every scenario. The first step is examining the scenarios, these conditioned thought-patterns, in the light of Consciousness. Let us first examine some of our most extensive mind games that are rooted deepest:
EBOOKS AVAILABLE AT AMAZON’S BOOKSTORES WWW.CONSCIOUSNESSBOOKS.CF Ambition Ambition is perhaps the comprehensive mind game, providing one of the deepest roots of Ego. An elementary endeavour of every Ego is growing: to be “more”, larger and powerful. They strive to be higher and higher in the hyerarchic structure of the world, conquering more and more territory. The individual’s ambitions grow and grow, reaching larger and larger areas. Ambitions are planted in a child by parents and teachers. Parents tend to think of an even yet unborn child as someone who is going to achieve the parents’ own’s unfulfilled ambitions. With the educational means of reward and punishment, children are conditioned to excel among their peers, to be the best, strongest, most beautiful, etc. When the children meet the parental–and thus the social–expectations, they are
rewarded, when not, they are punished. They therefore soon learn to be ambitious. These ambitions, though based upon the past, always aim at the future. All through our lives we pursue illusionary objectives, spurred by various ambitions. Naturally, it is not impossible to satisfy an ambition, but it is immnediately replaced by a thousand others, as there are so many areas of life where we have not yet reached our ambitions. That is how we chase senseless goals all through our lives until we die, when we realize that everybody leaves this world empty-handed, even those who lived their whole lives chasing mirages of past and future. Look into yourself to see what is in you now! See what ambitions are driving you along on the sea of life and in what direction? The Wanderer in every moment spent awake faces two alternatives: a choice is to be made between the ambitions stretching between past and future, or the quiet, simplicity, purity and emptiness, full of vibrating life, of the present. It is, however, only the latter that brings to the life of the Wanderer the Witnessing Presence!
The Mind Game of Becoming Something This mind game is closely associated with the life-long pursue of ambitions, and reveals the mechanisms of ambitions. The Ego at all times strives to achieve something. The mind creates a mental image, an ideal about it. An ideal means that you are still not what you are supposed to be. The Ego projects that idealized image into the future, and reveals the way leading to the goal. That image generates a permanent stress, tension and anxiety in the life of the
Wanderer. If the Wanderer achieves the desired goal, or abandons it as unattainable, immediately finds a new one, an even more ambitious, or one that is easier to achieve, and another one, and so it goes until death, or the moment when the Wanderer realizes the futility of the whole process. We are therefore constantly on the road, straying from one mental image to the next, and identify with these images, and derive our identity from the images. When we start dealing with spirituality, our mind creates an image that we need to implement if we are determined to be successful. The image means that we need to find Presence, through the way the mind imagines it. The essence of this ideal is to be permanently conscious, to be Present all the time, in all details of our life. The Ego, is however, aware that for most people it is an impossible venture, so the Wanderer often has a sense of self-accusation and self-depreciation, as the ideal image is impossible to achieve (the Wanderer is not spiritual enough). This state of mind is, eventually, a good foundation for the mind game of guilt. In the course of our Journey we need to realize that we do not need to become anything, because we are already in possession of the characteristics that we have been looking for so far, pursuing an image projected into the future. All we need to do is shift our focus of alert and conscious attention from the edge (Ego) to our center (witnessing Presence). The mind games impede us in that process! The “I Want Even More� – Mind Game From all this it is easy to see that the Ego-dominated mind will never be satisfied, as it longs to achieve more and more in life. The individual wants to be rich, when they are rich, they want power, when they have power, they want fame.
When material wealth no longer satisfies them, they begin to seek “spiritual wealth” and so forth. Once an objective has been achieved, a sense of relative satisfaction may follow, but sooner or later anxiety returns and the chase for more and more starts again. This mind game takes the Wanderer into a psychological time frame, as the goal to be achieved is projected into the future. In this way Now, the Present moment is reduced to a moment necessary for achieving the goal, and the vividness and beauty of it is lost. The Wanderer is, however, able to suppress the voice of the Ego: "I no longer listen to this nonsense, your pretension! It is not an illusory Self that I want to reach. I want to find my real Self!" As a witnessing Presence one is able to observe these games of the mind and is also able to overcome and laugh at it! What more does one need than what is offered by the present moment? Once you have learnt how to dissolve in the present moment, and you are able to enjoy it, you will have no problem in disregarding the empty chit-chat of the Ego, the mind! The “I am Important” – Mind Game The Ego-dominated mind, way of thinking is, in the majority of the cases, able to make us believe that we are important, even if only as a small part of the great universal consciousness of mankind. Our soul shall live forever, and the death is only a necessary station in the process of a new birth. Our soul develops eternally, every bit of new experience is another brick in the wall of the church of eternity etc. Why is the Ego-dominated Mind Able to Make Us Believe That?
It is partly because the contents of the Ego consists of the knowledge gathered in our life (read, heard). The individual who has never read esoteric books or attended esoteric lectures has an Ego with an entirely different content and uses different ideas as a comforting source (e. g. let us eat, drink, make love, as we only live once, so Carpe Diem). Another reason is that the “primeval memory” lives in everybody. The “primeval memory” is from our own, long forgotten internal center, and in most cases it is just a subconscious desire, a constant anxiety in the soul of the Wanderer. Ego provides a form to that unconscious desire by directing it to a false objective. The false goal is the idea of becoming perfect together with the Ego. The Ego, naturally, intends to achieve it in the future, since we need to develop so much before achieving the goal. This is a sincere endeavour of the Ego, but it is impossible to achieve it on the level of forms and shapes; it is not possible to make the forms and shapes eternal. We therefore must not allow this mind game to deceive us. From the aspect of Existence we are really important (in that we are not mistaken) in our individuality, as we provide space for the Consciousness to wake up to its own existence and flourish through us, through our own form. Perfection is, however, not to be sought in the future, as we are fully capable of experiencing it here and now, if we abandon ourselves into the present moment and allow the pleasure of Existence take us with it. The “I am Special” – Mind Game Every human being is convinced deep inside that he/she is special. In the course of the Journey the Ego keeps whispering into the ears of the Wanderer: "You are special, you are great, better than the other people!”
Often the Ego does not declare it so openly, but the desire to become special is there in every Wanderer. It is well observable in the behavior and actions of the Wanderer; all these are aimed at making the individual better and different from the rest, to emerge from the average. When you believe that “I am special, more special than that man over there,” be aware that it is only the game of the mind. That feeling reinforces the Ego to a very large extent. The reality is that every single person is individual and special. There has never been and will never be another person on the Earth like you! You must not forget that when you think of yourself as special–you really are–you should think of the other people in a similar way. Everybody is special you meet during your life, everyone who has lived and lives on Earth. This recognition reduces and eliminates this mind game.
The Tricks of the Mind Reinforcing the Ego The mind has dominated our life for such a long time that we have forgotten that it is only one of the means of Consciousness that has started an independent life as a consequence of our identifying with it. The Consciousness erroneously identifies itself with the mind, which has in turn acquired a great power and intends to preserve its independence and dominance. To that end, it uses Ego-reinforcing psychological strategies in order to sustain the separate Consciousness. In the following, some of these strategies are discussed. The Mind Game Generating Guilt
During your Journey you would like to bring the Presence into your daily routine, so you are trying to spend as much time in the state of the witnessing Presence as possible. That is a noble effort, but alas, it is soon experienced that it fails day by day. The question arises, ”What is the reason for the failure? Why can I not spend a longer period in the state of Witnessing Presence, when I want to? It is surely because I am not good enough, and I am unable to make the required effort. I am unsuited for such a noble task!” Such thoughts inevitably generate guilt and remorse. The guilt may, after a time, become so overwhelming that the individual gives up the desire to live in the Presence in order to avoid the negative emotions that come with the guilt.
EBOOKS AVAILABLE AT AMAZON’S BOOKSTORES WWW.CONSCIOUSNESSBOOKS.CF This is an extremely dangerous mind game! Why? It is to be recognized that the negative emotions and the guilt that comes with it is not a part of the Consciousness, it only belongs to the mind! The Ego –and so guilt as well–is a social product, created by the expectations of the parents and teachers as a part of the mind. How? A small child’s adaptation to the external world is supported and sustained by the parental expectations. Whenever a child meets the parental (and so the social) expectations, the child is accepted, rewarded and loved. Otherwise some sort of a punishment or rejection
follows. In order to avoid retaliation, the child will unconsciously meet the expectations. As long as the child is small, the expectations appear as external stimuli for the child. The child behaves well, because mum (or dad) should not be angry, should love him/her. As the child grows up, these external expectations undergo a complicated psychological process and become internal ones, and create the foundations of Ego. At that time children no longer behave the way it is expected by the society because they direct environment so desires, but because it generates an inner good feeling in them. When they do not behave in accordance with these social expectations, they experience guilt. That is how external social effects become parts of the Ego. This mechanism follows us all through our lives. At one point of our Journey we meet the teachings of an awakened teacher, and internally we feel that this is what we have long been looking for, we want it to be a part of our daily routine. We are thus able to create some internal expectations regarding how we are able to do it, what the fastest way to incorporating Presence into our life may be. We are, however, unable to meet the expectations, so guilt appears automatically. Be aware that this is the work of the Ego, a game of the mind! What can we do with that guilt? Several things are to be taken into consideration. One is that we have been living identified with the Ego (on the edge) so long that we have drifted too far from the center (Consciousness, Self, Presence). It is therefore not possible to get back to the center overnight (the possibility is there, naturally, as the center is within us, but we do have to make the effort to reach it). The progress on our Journey towards the Witnessing Presence initially requires efforts from us.
There is an important maxim that applies to that effort: every step in the right direction takes us closer to our own center. It means that moments add up and reinforce each other. There are inevitable occasions when one temporarily drops back into the Ego-dominated state, and these cases are also followed by a sense of guilt. Once we have understood the mechanism of the emergence of guilt, and bear in mind what has been discussed above, we need to realize that in such instances guilt is not justified! On our Journey, we should not dwell on the guilt emerging because of dropping back to Ego-dominated state; instead, we should celebrate that we are in the state of the Presence!! When one is able to rejoice about these moments, instead of worrying about the next possible dropback, then the positive periods will be more and more frequent in our lives. We therefore need to be patient with ourselves, and look upon our sense of guilt as Witnesses! The “You Are Worthless”– Mind Game When our environment does not confirm that we are special, and in our childhood we often heard from adults that “You can’t even do such a simple thing!” or “That kid is so clumsy!” or”This kid must have two left hands!,” then our Ego begins to whisper into our ears things like "You are average, you are below the average" and even "You are worthless!". This mind game also serves to reinforce the Ego, but here complaining is the Ego-reinforcing strategy. Complaining, blaming others or the circumstances or ourselves lead to negative thoughts that arises and reinforces pain. The result
is guilt or anger against other people, which in turn boosts the Ego. If we are able to bear in mind that nobody is average, and no such thing as the average person exists, we can prevent this mind game from taking over. That it is not true, and you know at least ten average people is something that is only suggested by your Ego. In fact everybody is special, and everybody should be approached that way. In this way it is possible to destroy this mind game! The “It’s Not My Fault!” – Mind Game The Ego likes blaming responsibility on other people. The Ego judges life by the specific situation. It is always somebody else who is at fault: a wife or husband, parents, children, colleagues, the boss, the economic situation, life itself etc. When such a person intends to reach the Presence, he or she will believe that at the moment change is not possible. Maybe later, in the future, when circumstances are more advantageous. Then they may try to live more consciously. These are, however, only excuses, so that the person does not have to face the truth: "I am responsible for myself, and nobody else is!" From the very moment of accepting the truth that "I am responsible for my own suffering, and nobody else is!," the person will be able to put an end to the sufferings and leave the spell of this mind game behind. The Comforting Mind Game The contents of the Ego is the knowledge put together during the individual’s earlier personal history, what he/she learnt from parents, teachers, schools, from the books read and movies saw. This knowledge is, however, mechanical,
as it is not derived from direct experience but from the thoughts and ideas of other people. The mind, when playing its games, relies on that knowledge in order to comfort and lull the individual. The mind is pleased to answer the great questions of life for you: "Yes, your body will die, but your soul is immortal!! Do not worry, you will come to no harm, you will surely get to heaven after your death." Depending on the religious upbringing one receives (Christian, Muslim, Buddhist etc.), this mind game alleviates the person’s fear of death with tales about the afterlife or, if the person is spiritual, with those of the immortality of the soul. The mind is pleased to supply advice and comfort in every situation. But these are dead, empty words, as they are based upon other people’s knowledge, writings, which those other people inherited from yet other people. When you really want to find the answers to the great questions of your life, you need to look for them deep in yourself. Do not answer from memory, as all such answers will come from your mind, from your dead memories! First you must face your own reality in the present, here and now! If you fail to do that, if you do not obtain first-hand experience from it, there will be no deep, far-reaching changes in you. You must make the Journey along the road, nobody is able to do it for you! The Ego-dominated mind always aspires for something special, and rejects ordinary things. When the mind is interested in spirituality, then it will long for secrecy and mystic experience. On its Journey, in the Present and in meditation the mind is looking for such experience.
This very desire prevents us from getting anywhere, so on our Journey we are getting farther and farther from our center, or go in circles around and around at best. There is nothing special in the Present and in the meditation. The person simply submits to the present moment. The individual is present, without any desire for something special and mystic. This is the ordinariness of the Present, without anything special, mystic or mysterious, it simply exists!! One should live through one’s life from moment to moment, and allow things happen the way they want to happen. Abandon yourself into the Present! Be consciously present in every moment! “The Future Will Be Different”– Mind Game In our Journey we have all experienced some pleasure and joy, and we would like to experience them again and again in the future. Similarly, everyone has experience suffering, and we tend to project these sufferings into the future, as we wish to avoid such situations. In this way, we all have a vision of future. Our own personal future is therefore is the patched, improved, modified version of our own past. Those who decide to live in the Present, must leave their past behind. Once past has been left behind, future also disappears! What is left then? The actual moment, the Present! Living in the here and now means that we are able to get rid of time and suffering! The “I Want to Be Like Him (Her)”– Mind Game On our Journey we carry the desire from our childhood to imitate others. Learning by imitation is one of the most elementary methods of integration into society. We utilize
this method from early childhood. That is how we learn to speak and learn to use various tools etc.
EBOOKS AVAILABLE AT AMAZON’S BOOKSTORES WWW.CONSCIOUSNESSBOOKS.CF Later, adults guide us consciously: "Be like your father, brother, the boy/girl next door, your classmate etc." Then we consciously begin to imitate others. Even later the process becomes integral, and we start to make efforts to match images and idols created by our own. We thus become imitations ourselves, continually staring at our ideals to be achieved in the future, or our mistakes of the past that prevented us from achieving our goals. In the meanwhile, we simply do not take notice of the present moment. That is exactly why the mind plays this game with us. If we live in the Now, in the Present, we accept ourselves the way we are, and give up making futile efforts imitate others, to be imitations. That is the only way of stopping this mind game! The “How to Get Rid of the Ego”– Mind Game On our Journey we may ask ourselves the question, “How can we get rid of the Ego?” Who asks this question? The mind itself, the Ego. When the mind asks that question, we assume that it cannot be the mind, as the Ego-dominated mind surely does not want its own destruction!
We want to shed Ego, so we are deeply involved in various spiritual studies, in search of the method that is applicable in our own current situation and circumstances for weakening the Ego, which will eventually disappear. That is how the mind misleads us again. For studying spiritual methods and choosing the appropriate one takes time, and time is in short supply. Our real Self does not ask questions, as it does not require answers. It is there, it is present Now. We are only able to find it if we forget about questions and submit to the Self, radiating its light in the Present! Our real Self is light itself, shining bright!! The “You Have to Choose” – Mind Game Reaching beyond ourselves, exceeding our mind is not a simple thing. It is, in fact, impossible–one half of the Ego is trying to exceed the other. In our Journey our mind keeps offering us choices, we have to choose between various alternatives arising in our mind. Once we have made a choice, we should choose things and opinions that are beautiful, intelligent and are in good moral (be good, if you can!). Choice, in the majority of the cases, means identification, so we tend to identify with the more beautiful, more intelligent side of the mind, keeping the ugly, immoral and dark dimensions of the mind away from us. Identification always involves worry, anxiety, as we are afraid of losing the things we have identified with, thus losing ourselves (which is in this case the Ego). If we lose the thing we have identified with, pain appears. What can we do against it?
First we have to understand that we are not the mind! We are identical with neither its bright, nor its dark side! Identifying with the bright side means we are unable to detach ourselves from the dark one. In this way we are trying to tear out one of our hands with the other! We need to understand that we are fully independent of the mind, we are only witnesses of events. Once we break our identification with our mind, we immediately recognize that fact. We must therefore detach ourselves from the mind, and then we are able to stay in the role of the eyewitness. This is the state of awareness, when Presence clearly shines out!
The Mindind-based Scenario of Our Our Spiritual “Development” During our Journey we accumulate a vast amount of knowledge of the world. From the books read, lectures heard and conversations we try to pick the useful and interesting bits of information, ideas, thoughts and theories. The same applies to experience. We believe that if we gather a sufficient amount of information during our Journey, we achieve something, we improve, we make a progress. All the knowledge and experience collected, however, improves the contents of the mind, that is, a part of the Ego. When we are interested in the spiritual development, we apply the same method. In this way we believe we are richer as we accumulate a lot of information, we will have more spiritual experience. The Mosaic Image of “Truth”
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The Author Dr. Ferenc Margitics Ph.D. (a.k.a. Frank M. Wanderer) Professor, Department of Psychology at College of Nyíregyháza Contacts: E-mail: margif61@gmail.com Web: http://the-awakening-of-consciousness.blogspot.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frank-M-Wanderer-TheAwakening-of-Consciousness/1469502989943663
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