The College Tribune, Issue 12, Volume 24

Page 1


The difference is we’re independent

Printed in Ireland

EU-IMF Analysis

Interview with Leinster Coach, Joe Schmidt

Summer Music Festivals Preview




page 8

page 14 Sport

Siren pages 4-5

Students Warned to Behave on Final Day of Term


Donie O’ Sullivan


UCD and the Students’ Union (SU) have told students that misbehaviour on campus this Thursday, the fi nal day of term, could lead to the cancellation of the rescheduled UCD Ball. The annual event was rescheduled and moved to Saturday, May 23rd following negotiations between the University and the SU after it was revealed that the event could not be held on campus on the original date scheduled, Thursday, April 21st. A section of the memorandum of understanding signed by UCD President, Dr. Hugh Brady, and SU President, Paul Lynam, states, “UCD Students’ Union will issue a communication to all students outlining the need for good behaviour in advance of and during the UCD Ball. This communication will highlight that inappropriate behaviour on April 21st will jeopardise the UCD Ball on the 23rd April.” Such a stipulation exists as the SU and University fear that some students may celebrate the fi nal

day of term on campus and break University regulations. When the news broke two weeks ago that the UCD Ball had been cancelled, several thousand students expressed an interest in ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A communication has been sent to all students encouraging good behaviour in advance of and during the UCD Ball so as not to jeopardise the event.


attending a Facebook event called “The Alternative UCD Ball,” encouraging students to congregate on the athletics track on Thursday the 21st. The event has since been removed from the social networking website. A UCD spokesperson reiterated the understanding on Friday, telling The College Tribune, “As agreed with the UCD Students’ Union, a communication has been sent to all students encouraging good behaviour in advance of and

during the UCD Ball so as not to jeopardise the event.” An email sent to every student in the University from the SU stated, “In order for the ball to go ahead, the Students’ Union must comply with a set of stipulations. One of the key stipulations laid down by the university is that good behaviour on Thursday April 21st is a must. If there are ANY incidences of antisocial behaviour on the original date of the ball, the UCD Ball, now scheduled for Saturday 23rd of April will not go ahead.” The statement continued, “The Students’ Union will condemn any




Cntd. on page 2


Students Crack Following Egg-ceptional Move by University

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________ __________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ ________________________________ ________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________

Rás UCD a Runaway Success

Donie O’ Sullivan

Sinéad Williams



UCD Students scrambled to Facebook last week following the disappearance of one of Belfield’s most iconic monuments. A “Save our Egg” Facebook page was set up when students noticed that “Noah’s Egg,” a large cast bronze egg sculpture adjacent to the Veterinary Science building, was removed. The “Save our Egg” campaign, a

parody of the successful Students’ Union “Save our Ball” campaign, had over 1,000 followers on Facebook at the time of going to print. Social media speculation on why the sculpture was removed was rife throughout the week. Some students suggested that the Egg had been taken by Trinity College ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Continued on page 6

Even Collee, the UCD Soccer mascot, wonders where the egg is


News 1-4

Features 5-6

Gaeilge 7

Opinion 8


The second annual Rás UCD took place last Saturday with almost 400 people taking part in the 5km race around campus, which was organised by An Cumann Gaelach, UCD Volunteers Overseas (UCD VO) and the UCD Athletics Club. Over €4,500 was raised by the event for the projects of UCD VO, with the race attracted staff and students from UCD, as well as

runners from around the country. The event was set up to raise funds for UCD VO. The organisation was established in 2003 by former UCD Chaplain, Fr. Tony Coote, and now offers students, staff and alumni of UCD the opportunity to participate in development projects overseas. Projects are ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Continued on page 5


Sports 14-16

April 20th 2011 | Vol. 24 No 12


Students Warned to Behave on Final Day of Term ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Donie O’ Sullivan


Continued from cover


students in breach of the Student Code and will support the University in disciplinary action. The Students’ Union have made every effort to come to an agreement with the University in order for the UCD Ball to proceed. We will condemn students who jeopardise this agreement with anti-social behaviour.” [sic.] Students who live on campus will need wristbands to access residences and are not permitted to keep over-night guests. Students who live on campus have also been reminded that should they wish to use their car on the day of the UCD Ball, they must park it

2 |

off campus beforehand as they will not be permitted to move it on Saturday. Paul Lynam, SU President, explained to The College Tribune that students who break regular campus rules on the fi nal day of term may have their details taken by campus security, and could be refused entrance to the UCD Ball on Saturday. Jonny Cosgrove, SU Ents Officer

said, “I would tell students to enjoy themselves on Thursday, just keep it within in the rules, you can have a great time and it should be a great day in the bar. We don’t want the minority ruining it all for the majority.” Cosgrove also pointed out that “we saved the Ball, so we don’t want to lose it now. It’s our Ball, so let everyone enjoy it.”

YOU Shall Go to the Ball


Donie O’ Sullivan


UCD Students are set to enjoy the rescheduled UCD Ball this Saturday with an array of national and international acts expected to perform on the Athletics Track. At the time of going to print, The College Tribune was unable to gather the information of the acts confi rmed to play the 2011 UCD Ball from UCD Students’ Union (SU), however news of the line-up will be available on www. when made available. The Ball, which Met Éireann (at the time of print) forecast to occur on a warm Saturday with temperatures to reach 18 Celsius, is normally held on the fi nal day of term. However the event was temporarily cancelled when UCD authorities said they could not allow the event to take place on

campus on Thursday, 21st April. A successful “Save our Ball” campaign was launched by the Ball's organisers, UCD Students' Union, which eventually led to the University agreeing to allow the Ball to take place on Saturday, 23rd. Jonny Cosgrove, UCD SU Entertainments Officer spoke about the success of the ‘Save Our Ball’ campaign, “The momentum picked up in the fi rst 24 hours, we didn't expect it to get as big as it did.” Cosgrove explained that the rescheduling of the Ball put the Ents team under pressure to organise the event in less than two weeks. “Myself and Paul Kilgallon have not really stopped for a minute. We have to make sure every aspect of the event goes ahead from the line up, to the chipper vans, to the concessions.”

The Ball will continue the same format as previous years with two stages and performances beginning at 2pm and fi nishing up before midnight. The “Big Wheel” ferris wheel which had been promised by Cosgrove for the original date is unavailable for the rescheduled Ball, but Cosgrove promises some other “high adrenaline rides.”

Tickets for the UCD Ball are available from the SU Library Shop and For the latest news in the run-up and in the afters of the UCD Ball, log on to


D E V A S WE UCD Ents in association with Spin 103.8 are proud to present...


23 April 2011 rd

Tickets â‚Ź39.99 Student card required

Maximum 2 tickets per person roar / gov id

TICKETS on sale April



from thURSDAY @ 1 online e Librar 2pm @ www y Shop & .UCDEnt | 3


SU Executive O≤cers Elected in Unconstitutional Election


Michael Phoenix

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________

Voting took place last week across the faculties of UCD as next year’s Students’ Union (SU) Programme and Executive Officers were elected. Four students fought it out for the two executive positions within Arts where 1104 votes were polled, creating a quota of 365 to be reached. Micheál Gallagher and Aisling Sheerin came out on top with 35% and 31% of the vote respectively, besting Philly McCann and Mark Stokes. Commenting on the race, Gallagher expressed his delight at winning a position. “I think euphoric would be the word… I ran last year and came third, so it just goes to show you have to keep trying.” Gallagher, who lost the Arts election by only sixteen votes last year, said he was looking forward to working with Ms. Sheerin to implement the promises of their manifestos. “Aisling is a great woman, very organised, she’ll be excellent to work alongside.” Gallagher also praised the friendly nature of the race, commenting “It was a very clean race… I think there were a lot of friends made.” Five contested the PRO race in Science, however, unlike in Arts, only one position was up for grabs. The position was taken by Chris Wong who took 55% of the vote, who said his hard work paid off. “I put my best into it, I’m glad so many people supported me.” He promised to take on board the ideas of the other candidates “…they had amazing ideas and I’ve been discussing those with them.” Catherine Murnane, Roisin Conran and Aidan Conroy ran unopposed in Law, Business and Health Sciences respectively. No sizeable RON campaign was mounted against any of the candidates with Murnane taking 88% of the vote, Conran 97% and Conroy 91%. Next years Law programme officer Murnane said she was eager to get started. “I’m really looking forward to getting more involved in the law school and fi nally dealing with issues that many students seemed unhappy with.” Commenting on the peculiar situation, strangely prevalent in these elecions, of running a campaign with the option to reopen nominations as the sole opponent, Murnane admitted “It saved me having to worry about burning a hole in my pocket. I put my manifesto online instead of printing off countless copies and it still got a great response.”

News In Brief UCD academic to investigate GMIT complaints procedure

A UCD academic is to take part in an external investigation in to how Galway Mayo Institute of Technology (GMIT) responded to and dealt with “complaints/ suspicions” of plagiarism. Professor Bairbre McRedmond, UCD deputy registrar of teaching and learning, along with a barrister and mediator have been invited by GMIT’s acting president to investigate how the institution dealt with an allegation of plagiarism at the college’s School of Business, which has already been subject to three internal inquiries.

4 |

The incident involved a fi nal year student gaining access to a password-protected instructor’s manual containing simple answers to assessment questions. The student was subsequently docked marks, but the School of Business had initially treated the allegation as “minor” rather than “major”. The investigation will focus on the procedure of dealing with the complaint but also as to whether “any relevant matter was suppressed, concealed or covered up by the department, school or institute, or any member of staff ” and potentially “may be extended . . . to cover any matter that has a direct bearing” on the specific incident.

Caoimhe Seoige was elected Irish Language Officer in an uncontested race with 89% of the total pole, whilst Martin Lawless was re-elected unopposed to the post of Postgraduate Officer with 86%. Emma Lynch will be next years Agricultural Science PRO after garnering 94% of the vote from a total pole of 72 votes. In the veterinary election, 91 votes were cast, with Becca Keefe taking 85% of the vote in the uncontested race. The position of Gender Equality Officer, formerly Woman’s Officer, was won by Patrick Wolohan, who will work closely with next years Welfare Vice-President Rachel Breslin. Wolohan took 83% of the vote with 1879 votes. The position was rechristened under its new title following the result of the recent referendum run alongside this years sabbatical elections. Conrad Richardson will be the new Environmental Officer, after seeing off Róisín Carlos in a tight race with Richardson taking 53% of the vote to Rosins 41%. As pointed out in The College Tribune, this years Programme Officer elections were held in breach of the SU constitution. The elections, which took place in week 11, disregarded the explicit wording of the constitution stating they must be held no earlier than week seven, and by week ten of semester two of the college term. Article 23, section 1, referring to the election of Directly Elected Executive Officers states, “The Postgraduate Officer, the Irish Language Officer, the Women’s Officer and Environmental Officer shall be collectively be known as the “Directly Elected Executive Officers” and shall be elected annually in elections held not earlier than the seventh week of the second semester and not later than the tenth week of the second semester.” When asked whether this may weaken the position of the incoming officers, Micheál Gallagher said that they would have to wait and see. “We can’t be entirely sure what it will mean.” Incoming Science PRO Chris Wong pointed out that the late elections were “stressfully” close to the fi nal semester exams. Unsuccessful Arts PRO candidate, Mark Stokes, had previously voiced his concerns surrounding the issue to The College Tribune. “Anyone who receives the winning vote in the election would not have a mandate that they could follow through on.” The issue, however, was put to the IAB, who in effect may have had little alternative but to allow the elections as necessarily valid and affi rm their results. Paul Lynam, UCDSU President said he accepted the IAB’s ruling and added “mistakes were made this year that will be reconciled next year.”

USPS Deliver Wrong Statue

Farrell to lead “We the Citizens” think-tank

The US Postal service has been embarrassed by revelations that their latest limited edition stamp features a Casino replica of the world famous Statue of Liberty, rather than the Liberty Island original. The stamp, 3 billion of which have already been issued, depicts the face of the half-size model currently on display in the New York-New York casino in Las Vegas, a mistake which was pointed out by a keen stamp collector. “We still love the stamp design and would have selected this photograph anyway,” said Roy Betts, a spokesman for the USPS. Mr. Betts did say, however, that the post office regrets the error and is “re-examining our processes to prevent this situation from happening in the future.”

UCD politics Professor David Farrell is to be the academic lead of a team of political scientists tasked with devising a strategy to renew trust in public life. ‘We the Citizens’, the independent national initiative funded by Atlantic Philanthropies, will hold a national assembly in June to consider methods of making

political institutions better serve the people of Ireland. Professor Farrell, head of the School of Politics & International Relations in UCD, said at the launch of the programme last week, that “[Citizen assemblies] are a new and innovative way of allowing citizens to be actively involved in taking important decisions that affect our daily lives. Citizens are given the opportunity to be informed, to consider and debate

all sides of an argument: they are then able to take decisions on what are often quite complex issues.”The assembly will consist of 150 people representative of a cross-section of Irish society. The Academic team is also made up of Dr. Jane Suiter of University College Cork, Dr. Eoin O’Malley of Dublin City University and Dr. Elaine Byrne of Trinity. An international board of Academics will also provide advice.

No Surprises at Radioheads’ Awards The second annual Belfield FM Ball (BFMies) produced a clean sweep of the major awards for the Student Media Awards shortlisted News show, with head of news Amy Walsh taking home Best Female Presenter and anchor Gordon O’Callaghan picking up Best Male. News on Belfield FM was also co-awarded Best Show, along with lunchtime show UCD&U. Darragh O’Connor was awarded Best Speciality show for The Wrestling Show. Speaking after the ceremony in the Belvedere Hotel, Station Manager Ciara Murphy said, “It was really tough to choose [winners] this year because the standard of talent was so high. It was a really great year that wouldn’t have been achievable without the volunteers.” Murphy, along with assistants Dáire Brennan and Danny Murray, were thanked by the station’s regulars for their contribution during the year. The station is now taking applications for managerial positions in the coming academic year (see page 14).


Rás UCD a Runaway Success


Sinéad Williams


Continued from cover


currently being run in India, Haiti, Nicaragua and Tanzania; for example, health care centres have been built in Nicaragua and computer education programmes have been set up in Tanzania. Participants paid between €8 and €15 to take part in the race, depending on whether they registered before or on the day, and whether or not they are a student. Sponsorship of the event meant that each runner received a free t-shirt and goody bag for their involvement. Centra and Foras na Gaeilge sponsored the goody bags, while Ramblers’ Way sponsored the t-shirts. €2,000 was donated by Bord na Gaeilge towards the organisation of the race, while further donations were received from other sources. Runners were treated to a free sports massage af-

ter the race and a “very successful” cake sale was held. The race was won by Emmett Dunleavy from County Sligo, who fi nished the race in a time of just over 15 minutes. UCD student Robert Corbally fi nished in second place, while his fellow student Laura Ní Sheachnasaigh was the fastest female competitor. The fastest person in the Under 20’s category was student Killian Mooney, with the Over 40 and Over 50 categories being won by Eddie McGrath and Eugene Doherty respectively. Participants could choose to run or walk the five kilometres, with all competitors fi nishing the race in just under 50 minutes. Founder of the race, Dónal Hanratty, said that he felt that the day went “really, really well”. He said that people “from all over the country came along...we were very

Athletes start the second annual Rás UCD, Photo: Dáire Brennan pleased with the turn out”. Hanratty went on to say that all money raised would go directly to UCD VO, as sponsorship had been found to cover the costs of the race. “All the entrance fees that people paid to get into the race, all of that money went straight towards the projects in Haiti, Nicaragua, Tanzania and India.” Peadar Ó Lamhna, who was involved in registration for the race, said that he was very happy with how the event went, saying that it was “very well organised”. Welfare Officer elect Rachel Breslin took part in the race, stating

that it was “really well run, really fun and everyone who took part seemed to really enjoy it”. She said that she was very happy with her performance in the race. Richard Pyne, a fi rst-time crosscountry runner, also participated in the Rás. He said that the event was “brilliantly organised” with easy registration and a well mapped out course. “I really enjoyed because it was organised well and there was no pressure.” Chairman of the Rás UCD committee, Tim Grummell, was also pleased with the success event. The

PhD student was head of the committee which organised the race. This committee was made up of members of An Cumann Gaelach, UCD VO and UCD Athletics Club. SU Sports’ Officer, Brendan Lacey, was also involved in the organisation of the event, though only “in the initial stages” according to Grummell. Lacey told The College Tribune that the race had “unfortunately” coincided with his election campaign. Grummell feels however that the Rás should be promoted more throughout the year. “The Rás UCD should be pushed on the

UCD calendar at all times”. He also said that the event should be organised earlier. Fellow organiser, Paul Gleeson, agreed, commenting that the Rás “will be bigger next year and organised from September”. Several sources have claimed that UCD Students’ Union was not heavily involved in the organisation of the Rás, though according to Hanratty, they helped with “printing out posters and use of phones and offices”. However, The College Tribune saw none of the current Students’ Union sabbatical officers at the event. | 5


Students Crack Following Egg-ceptional Move by University _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Donie O’ Sullivan


Continued from cover

Egg” was placed into storage to facilitate ground works in the area. Once the works are completed, it will be returned to public display.” The sculpture, which was unveiled in 2004, was a gift to the UCD Faculty of Veterinary Medicine from racehorse trainer Dermot Weld, a former student of the University. The sculpture is covered with sperm-like shapes of various creatures including man, bull, rabbit, rat and hamster. It is also decorated with small holes, which create a planetariumlike effect when viewed from the pointed end. According to the University, “No-


students, whilst others believed its removal was in some way related to the possibility of Barack Obama visiting the University. When contacted by The College Tribune on the infamous egg’s whereabouts, the University insisted it was safe. A UCD spokesperson said, “In the interests of good care, “Noah’s ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

In the interests of good care, “Noah’s Egg” was placed into storage to facilitate ground works in the area.


ah’s Egg represents the beginnings and potential of life, and symbolises both the field of veterinary medicine and the scholarly pursuits and ambitions of the Veterinary students and staff.” The Egg was created by Kerry native Rachel Joynt, who is also responsible for “Perpetual Motion,” a large sphere with road markings which stands on the Naas dual carriageway. The University President, Dr. Hugh Brady, was unavailable for comment when contacted by The College Tribune. However sources in the University say he likes his eggs hard-boiled.

UCD College Tribune April 19th 2011

learn to succeed

Learn to Succeed...

...with a Postgraduate Qualification from Independent College Dublin

Give your career an edge with career focused Postgraduate programmes commencing in September 2011, in the areas of Law, Business, Media & Journalism and Psychotherapy. LAW


• M.A. Dispute Resolution (Level 9) • Postgraduate Diploma Comparative Media Law (Level 9) • Postgraduate Certificate Comparative Media Law (Level 9) • LL.M Comparative Media Law (Level 9)

• M.A. Radio & TV Journalism (Level 9) - Sept 2012 • M.A. Journalism (Level 9)


ArTS & PSychoThErAPy • H.Dip Psychotherapy Studies (Level 8) • M.A. Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy (Level 9)

• M.Sc. Accounting (Level 9) • M.A. Marketing (Level 9) • M.Sc. Strategic Financial Management (Level 9) Follow us

Independent College Dublin, 60-63 Dawson Street, Dublin 2. Telephone: (01) 672 5058 Email:

Apply online at: 6 |


Tar Éis an Chreatha


Maria Ní Shíthigh


Galair an Tíoróidigh An baol dúinn iad?


Eoghan Ó Murchadha


Tá traidisiún láidir ag muintir na Seapáine thart ar an am seo den bhliain. Chomh luath is a f heictear an chéad bhláth ar chrann silíní bíonn gach orlach de thalamh i mbeagnach gach páirc sa tír plódaithe le daoine ag ithe, ag ól agus ag ceiliúradh teacht an Earraigh. Go hiondúil éiríonn daoine leis an ngrian chun spota deas a f háil dá gcóisir ach i mbliana tá clocha i bhfad níos mó ar phaidríní na ndaoine. Mar gheall ar an gcrith talún a bhuail oirthuaisceart na tíre ar an 11ú Márta fuair breis is 13,500 duine bás, tá níos mó ná 14,500 fós ar ceal agus fágadh beagnach 140,000 gan foscadh gan dídean. Ba é an tríú crith talún is mó a ndearnadh taifeadadh air riamh ar domhan agus tógfaidh sé tamall fada dul i ngleic le himpleachtaí na tubaiste. Ach is dream láidir, cróga iad na Seapánaigh agus ar fud na tíre tá daoine ag déanamh a ndíchill dul ar aghaidh leis an saol mar is gnáth. I dTóiceo, mar shampla, ní dhearnadh aon damáiste struchtúrach agus mar sin an t-aon chomhartha gur tharla tragóid mór millteach ná iarrachtaí an rialtais leis an leictreachas a chaomhnú. Mar sin níl na scáileáin mhóra fógraíochta i Shibuya ar siúl agus an rud céanna leis na soilse a lasann na crainn

silíní istoíche. Cinnte is féidir maireachtáil gan na rudaí seo. Ar an taobh eile den bhád tá bagairt ann i gcónaí maidir le fadhb núicléach ó Fukushima agus níos práinní ná sin b’f héidir, na hiar-chreathanna móra a bhuaileann an phríomhchathair ar bhonn laethúil, nach mór, agus cathracha ó thuaidh níos minice fós. Dar le hOifig Meitéareolaíochta na Seapáine rinneadh taifeadadh ar níos mó ná 400 iar-chrith sa mhí tar éis an 11ú Márta, agus sin iad na cinn níos mó ná 5.0 ar an scála Richter. Nuair a bhíonn tú i do shuí i gcaife agus cloiseann tú 20 guthán soghluaiste ag bualadh ag aon uair amháin tuigeann tú gur rabhchán atá ann agus go mbeidh crith-talún mór leat faoi cheann 20 soicind agus bíonn dóthain ama agat dul faoin mbord chun nach ngortófaí tú má thiteann rud éicint. Tá sé sin scanrúil agus tuigeann tú cén fáth ar f hág an-chuid gaijin nó eachtrannaigh an tSeapáin díreach i ndiaidh an chéad chreatha. Cáineadh na daoine seo, na fly-jin nó bye bye-jin mar a thugtar orthu, go mór sa meáin Sheapánacha mar dúradh gur thréig siad an tSeapáin in am a gátair. Ní aontaím leis seo in aon chor ach tuigim meon na ndaoine a scríobhann rudaí mar seo, go háirithe nuair a chloiseann

tú faoi ard-f heidhmeannaigh eachtrannacha ag bogadh a noifigí go háiteanna eile san Áis ar nós Hong Cong nó Singeapór. Tá siad buartha go gcasfaidh an domhan a dhroim ar an tSeapáin ó thaobh gnó agus inf heistíochta de. Díreach i ndiaidh an chéad chreatha tháinig na céadta tairiscint cabhrach isteach ó gach cearn den chruinne ach ansin dúirt na tíortha céanna dá saorálaithe an tSeapáin a f hágáil, rud a dhéanfaidh i bhfad níos mó dochair don tír go fadtréimhseach. Rinneadh scéal mór de nuair a dhiúltaigh rialtas na Seapáine cabhair Éireannach i ndiaidh an 11ú Márta. Ach an rud a chaithfear a thuiscint ná gur tír bhhródúil í an tSeapáin. Ní carthanacht atá uaithi ach cabhair. Má leanann daoine ar aghaidh ag ceannach earraí Seapánacha agus ag teacht anseo, b’f héidir ní díreach anois, beidh sí in ann cabhrú léi féin ach má chaileann daoine muinín in easpórtáil na tíre beidh sé i bhfad níos deacra ar an tír dul i ngleic lena cuid fadhbanna agus dul chun cinn a dhéanamh amach anseo. I bhfocail Trócaire, ní mór dúinn cabhrú leo cabhrú leo féin. Má dhéanaimid é seo faoi mar a rinneamar leis an gcrith talún i Kobe i 1995 níl aon dabht ach go dtiocfaidh an tSeapáin slán as an ngéarchéim seo gan mhoill.

Tá struchtúr beag sa mhuineál darbh ainm an f haireog thíoróideach, agus is iomaí hormón a chuireann sé isteach sa chóras fola. Faireog í, sé sin gur grúpa ceall a thálann leacht nó hormóin atá inti agus taistealaíonn siad seo tríd an bhfuil le héifeacht a bheith acu ar chuid eile den cholainn (fás nó meitibileacht a chur i bhfeidhm). Má tharlaíonn neamhord leis an bhfaireog is féidir go dtarlóidh galar dá bharr. Feictear na galair níos minice i measc na mban agus iad siúd atá dulta in aois. Don chuid is mó beidh an mac léinn comhaimseartha slán ach ó go bhfuil níos mó mac léinn aosta ag freastal ar an ollscoil ná mar a bhí le tamall de bhlianta, b’f héidir gur mhaith againn súil a chaitheamh ar na galair seo. Ceann acu, Galar Graves, bíonn sé ar dhuine nó beirt as thart faoi gach míle duine. An f hoirm is mó ina bhfeictear an galar seo ná in ainglis nó meall mór a ghobann as muiníl daoine. Faireog ar chruth féileacáin atá lonnaithe chun tosaigh sa mhuineál, díreach faoin úll brád, í an f haireog thíoróideach, a thálann hormóin thábhachtacha a mbíonn tionchar acu ar mheitibileacht na gceall inár gcolainn. Baineann sí úsáid as an iaidín le tíorocsaín(T4) agus trí-iadaitíoróinín(T3) (hormóin) a chruthú, agus is iad seo a dhéanann rialú ar chuid thábhachtach de f hás is de mheitibileacht ár gcolainneacha. Tá an f haireog thíoróideach faoi stiúir an hipeatalamais agus na faireoige piotútaí (faireoga san inchinn a thálann hormóin a mbíonn éifeacht acu ar an bhfaireog thíoróideach.)

Tá dhá phríomhchineál galair a éiríonn as na faireoga seo, ar an gcéad dul síos tá an hipirtíoróideacht, nó ina bhfágtar go gcruthaítear an-iomarca de na hormóin thíoróideacha seo. Mura gcruthaítear a dóthain hormón tíoróideach, is hipitíoróideacht a bhíonn i gceist. An dá ghalar is mó a tharlaíonn dá mbarr seo ná Galar Graves (as Robert James Graves dochtúir Éireannach a ainmníodh seo) agus Tíoróidíteas Hashimoto faoi seach. Má chuirtear isteach ar feidhmeanna an tíoróidigh trí easpa hormón a chur ar fáil, san hipitíoróideacht, is féidir bheith ag súil go mbeidh daoine traochta, go mbeidh siad mall ó thaobh luas na hintinne. San hipirtíoróideacht bíonn daoine ag bárcadh allais, cailleann siad meáchain, éiríonn siad róthe go héasca, is bíonn siad suaite is neirbhíseach. Is féidir fadhbanna a bheith ann chomh maith le cruth an tíoróidigh féin. Sa chás seo

bheadh cist(mála neamhghnách a bhfuil ábhar leachtach, gásach nó leathsholadach ann) nó ailse i gceist. Déantar galar sa tíoróideach a dhiagnóisiú le tástáil fola do na leibhéil T4 agus T3 atá san f huil a f háil amach. Déantar íomháú ar an bhfaireog ar nós scanadh ultraf huaime le méid is cruth na faireoige a f hiosrú. Déantar bithóipse (Nuair a bhaintear cuid de f híochán duine agus iad beo ar mhaithe leis an diagnóisiú) chomh maith, ach go háirithe i gcásanna ailse. Breathnóidh paiteolaí ar an sampla fíocháin seo. Ó thaobh cóir leighis tugtar cógas leis an oiread hormón a scaoiltear a laghdú nó cuirtear hormóin shintéiseacha ar fail do dhaoine de réir mar is gá. Téitear i muinín na máinliachta nuair a bhíonn an f haireog rómhór. Chomh maith is féidir radaíocht a úsáid leis an bhfaireog a scrios má tá sé rómhór.

Gluais Meitibileacht na próisis cheimiceacha a tharlaíonn sa chill is san orgánach a choinníonn beo iad. scanadh ultrafhuaime úsáid na dtonnta ultrafhuaime le scanadh a dhéanamh ar an gcolainn(an corp). Scanadh - íomháú. paiteolaí dochtúir a dhéanann staidéar ar phróisis na ngalar. fíochán cuid den cholainn a bhfuil cealla ann a bhfuil an struchtúr is an fheidhm chéanna acu. (tissue) hormóin shintéiseacha hormóin a cruthaíodh go saorga(go neamhnádúrtha). Ainglis – meall neamhghnách sa mhuineál. Úll brád – gnáthstruchtúr a ghobann as an muineál. | 7


Nice Country, Bad Balance Sheet


Few easy options exist regarding debt sustainability for our new Fine Gael/Labour Government, writes David McManus


For the fi rst time since this state was founded, the Irish Government has lost its ability to borrow on international markets. Globally, the reputation of this country has suffered serious damage by having to resort to funding from the EU & IMF. Unfortunately, few options exist that will make this situation that much better in the short term. Ireland currently suffers from three problems; an insolvent banking system, a fi scal crisis and an uncompetitive domestic economy. Separately, each challenge would be strenuous for any new government, but all three will require equal consideration by the new Fine Gael/Labour Government. It is most unfortunate for Ireland that defaulting on unguaranteed bank bondholders is not being countenanced within the EU. To do so would greatly reduce the burden of debt on Irish taxpayers, however opting for unilateral options in contravention of the EU-IMF deal is not an attractive option when one considers the consequences. In negotiations, it is common to predict and consider the opponent’s alternative options. So would Ireland have a Plan B? The renegotiation by the new government on the EU-IMF deal has been compared to a game of poker by those wishing to criticize the government’s efforts. According to proponents of this analogy, the Irish Government should play a better hand in attempting to bluff and should use

8 |

it’s trump card - the threat of bringing down the entire European fi nancial system (including Ireland’s) – if all else fails. The kamikaze option threatens just that; self-destruction for the Irish economy should it be considered. Manageable problems may be a consequence for the stability of the European fi nancial system but rejecting assistance would be the fi nal nail in the coffi n of the Irish economy. Other critics have proposed that Ireland should strike out unilaterally, defaulting on bank bondholders and, if required, “choose” to leave the Euro zone. A unilateral default on bondholders would threaten the funds from the EU-IMF. These are Ireland’s lenders of last resort. Currently neither the Irish state, nor the Irish banks, can borrow at all on international markets. An immediate funding crisis for the Irish state would not be out of the question – in which case larger cuts in public sector pay and social welfare would be immediate and automatic. Perhaps, unilaterally defaulting on bank bondholders was an option for the Fianna Fáil/Green Government, as last year Ireland could borrow on international markets. However that is a debate for economic historians to consider, not for policy makers. That unilateral option is certainly not open to Ireland now though, we are borrowing from the EU-IMF as there is no one else to borrow from. Ireland adopted the euro currency as legal tender in 2002. A new

currency would have the benefit of enhancing our competitiveness through devaluation against other currencies. However there are no examples in history of countries abandoning strong currencies in order to adopt weaker ones. This policy would cause an immediate collapse of the Irish banking system as depositors rush to withdraw and convert savings for stronger currencies before their deposits are changed for “An Punt Nua”. The Irish banking system is currently under-capitalised and as such, for the past two years, has been unable to distribute credit adequately to the economy. However, the ATM’s still operate in Belfield due the assistance of the ECB. Attempting to launch “An Punt Nua” is a logistical nightmare and perhaps the easiest way to precipitate an unprecedented fi nancial crisis. Members of the new 31st Dáil advocating that the government should march into Frankfurt and “get tough” with Europe, could do well by explaining in great detail the alternative options that are open to the Irish Government. Remember, this is not a fi rst year arts assignment. Maybe members of the People Against Prosperity Movement don’t understand the challenges facing Ireland. Maybe they don’t want to. For the all the public opposition within Ireland of bailing out bondholders, it is important to recognise the equal public opposition in the European mainland in bailing out states on

the periphery of Europe (Ireland, Greece and now Portugal). Many mainland European governments face looming elections and their electorate appear all too ready to deliver judgement on current governments seen to be going too easy on states suffering from weak competitiveness, fi scal indiscipline and weak fi nancial regulation. It is entirely unfair that Irish taxpayers should be expected to face the entire burden for reckless decisions made by European institutions in lending to Irish banks, however this is the position we are in. Political rhetoric and emotion will have no bearing on the outcome as the government prepares for numerous future rounds of negotiations. Since late last year, international chat shows have hosted commentators, stating it is a question of when, not if Ireland will default entirely on all its debts; sovereign and banking. This also has been put forward as a potential silver bullet solution to our large debts that we are continuing to build up. It is projected that if the EU-IMF

deal succeeds by 2014, we will have a Debt to GDP ratio of well over 100%. Countries that successfully default or “restructure” its debts, typically receive long term benefits (a lower debt mountain), but incur short term costs such as an inability to borrow at reasonable rates on international markets for a period of two to three years. Countries usually have their own independent currency to devalue the support of their economy and, subsequently, apply for funding from the IMF. Ireland would be unique though in not having an independent currency and having already applied for funding from the EU & IMF. Restructuring sovereign debt may become an option in the future, time will tell, but to default on the official lenders of last resort (EU & IMF) would be the ultimate policy leap into the unknown. A more likely scenario would be for Ireland to exit from the EU– IMF program with a large stock of external debt at similar levels to Italy or Belgium. The principal of

revenue has meant Ireland is now borrowing 10% of GDP each year to bridge the gap between low tax revenues and high levels of spending. The bubble revenues are gone and as a consequence, Ireland will have to reverse many of the tax cuts and spending increases as they were unsustainable. The previous government started this adjustment in 2008, however even with the large increases in taxes and cuts in expenditure, Ireland’s level of borrowing hasn’t fallen. The benefit of making this adjustment quickly is the saving on interest costs. To highlight the problem of extending the inevitable fi scal adjustment, Ireland faced an interest bill of €2 Billion on its national debt in 2008, before the budget ran into large deficit. By 2014, that interest bill will be €8.4 billion. Our national debt stood at 25% of GDP in 2007, and it will be in excess of 100% of GDP by 2014. Increasing taxes and reducing expenditure will certainly defl ate the Irish economy, however as our increasing interest bill shows, there

this debt would not be reduced, but instead only the interest is paid with debt being rolled-over as it falls due.A further agreement of receiving additional funds from the EU & IMF seems inevitable as it appears unlikely that Ireland will be able to return to the international markets in the medium term as the risk of an Irish default is still seen as a likely possibility. In ten short years, Irish banks more than tripled their total lending to the Irish economy. This splurge in cheap credit produced a bubble in the property market and also in the Irish public fi nances. Revenue from indirect taxes, such as VAT and Stamp Duty from property, increased substantially during this period allowing the Irish Government to reduce taxes and increase spending more than any other country in the EU. “When I have it, I spend it,” was how one Irish Minister for Finance described budgetary policy at the time. That bubble is now burst and will not be returning. The subsequent collapse in government

are no non-defl ationary options available in budgetary policy. The new government will have to focus on reducing costs by ensuring adequate competition in all areas of the economy. Due to the cost increases during the bubble period, costs will have to be reduced in areas such as energy, local authority charges and professional fees. Labour and property costs have already fallen however it will take an additional two/three years for our economy to recover competitiveness adequately for an export-led recovery. In conclusion, governments can only choose from options that are realistically available. A unilateral option that further threatens the stability of our fi nancial system and put our public fi nances at risk is thankfully not an option that the Fine Gael/Labour Government have considered. Alternative options that are at our discretion and will benefit our economy include improving our competitiveness and restoring our public fi nances to a sustainable position. | 9

Accelerate Your Career Trinity School of Business Masters Programmes

MSc in Business & Management Designed specifically for graduates who have a primary undergraduate degree in a subject that is not related to business. Our programme will compliment your foundation degree and bring added value to your knowledge, giving you the skills required for leading and managing in today’s complex business environment. It is a one-year full-time programme.

MSc in Finance A rigorous and comprehensive introduction to the tools and skills that finance professionals require and that are core to modern financial services. Our programme is designed for individuals who wish to develop their careers both inside and outside the financial services arena. It can be taken on a one-year full-time or two-year part-time basis.

MSc in International Management Develop and practice the advanced skills required for leading and succeeding on an international management stage. Our programme is designed specifically for those who have an undergraduate degree in business or a cognate discipline and can be taken on a one-year full-time or two-year parttime basis.

For further information, visit our website at 10 |

Editorial Positions Available for 2011/2012 Academic Year The College Tribune is now advertising the position of Editor(s) for Volume 25 of UCD’s only Independent newspaper. Job Description: This is a full time and extremely demanding job which requires the publication of at least ten issues of The College Tribune during the academic year. This involves highly unsociable hours under a pressurised environment. The candidate should have experience in journalism, as well as being a highly motivated individual. External applications outside the current College Tribune staff are encouraged. Responsibilities The College Tribune is a completely independent newspaper and receives no source of regular income. Therefore in addition to and edition of the newspaper every fortnight, the Editor(s) are responsible for sourcing efficient advertising to fund the print run of the publication. The Editor(s) are responsible for the appointment and management of an editorial staff in addition to the recruitment of the new contributors during Freshers’ Week and throughout the year. Wages The Editor(s) will be paid depending on the surplus amount of income raised from advertising for each issue once printing and other costs have been met. Experience As Editor of The College Tribune, you will gain important experience in the world of journalism and the year is an excellent stepping stone for anyone hoping for a professional career in journalism and the media. Previous editors have gone on to have successful careers in carious national media outlets. In addition to this, the experience of running a self sustaining business is important to anyone going forward in a professional career in many different sectors. Applications All interested applicants should submit a detailed proposal to the editor; including their experience and suitability for the job, how they would improve each section of the newspaper and any new ideas or suggestions they have for The College Tribune.

Applications should be handed into our office LG18, lower ground of the arts block or sent to: Colman Hanley, The College Tribune, Box 74, Students’ Centre, UCD, Belfield, Dublin 4. Applications should be sent in no later than 5:30:59pm on Friday 22nd of April 2011.

The College Tribune is also advertising the following positions for next year’s editorial staff:


Arts Editor

News Editor

Eagathóir Gaeilge (Irish Language Editor)

Web Editor

Turbine/Satire Editor

Music Editor

Sports Editor

Fashion Editor

All applicants for editorial positions should contact the current editor, Mr. Colman Hanley, by emailing | 11

Editorial Clarification The College Tribune would like to clarify an error that was printed in Volume 24, Issue 11 of The College Tribune, dated April 6th 2011. In the article titled ‘Apathy, Affluence and Administration’, a reference made to The University Observer was incorrect when stating that the paid staff of the publication receive a wage of €500 per week.


Colman Hanley The College Tribune would like to clarify that the paid staff of The University Observer receive €450 per issue, with the editor receiving €500 per issue. The College Tribune apologises for this error.


Emmet Farrell

News Editor:

Donie O'Sullivan

Deputy News Editor: Amy Walsh

Editorial The Final Issue of Volume 24, The College Tribune – Thank You With my tenure coming to a close, it is a time to reflect on a year which has flown by. The College Tribune has covered all sorts of stories for you, the students of UCD. The clamping of an ambulance car, the November Student Protest, the fiasco of the UCD Ball – a wide range of issues have all been reported on. A lot of time and effort has been given to cover these stories and publish this paper. A lot of sleep has been lost and sacrifices have been made in order to try and provide a free service to the students of UCD. The aim has always been to inform people of all the news relating to this university, with no hidden agenda or any body or authority having control over what we print. However in order to do this, it takes the effort of a lot of people. Firstly, I’d like to thank our fantastic designer, Emmet Farrell. Recruited on the back of a suggestion by a friend last summer, Emmet has been a huge asset to The College Tribune this year and is responsible for the look of the Tribune. Emmet deserves huge praise for the job he has done this year, and I believe he has a huge future in design in years to come. Thanks for putting up with my annoying emails and questions, and with myself and Donie harassing you over the year on altering things! The aforementioned News Editor has also been responsible for the success of our paper this year. Donie is by far and away the most enthusiastic person I have ever met – a quality which aids any journalist! Signed in the pre-season of 2010 from our neighbours The University Observer, Donie has been there every step of the way helping me through every production weekend. Thanks a million for all the help Donie, you’ve become a really good friend and I know you too have a huge future in journalism if you keep at it. Following on from our fantastic Sports Editor last year, Mark Hobbs has done a great job at reporting the best of UCD, national and global sport. Every weekend, Mark was out reporting on games or pushing people to cover them. Thanks for all the work Mark, and best of luck with next year! Do mo chara, Eoghan Ó Murchú, go raibh míle maith agat as ucht cabhair le gach rud i mbliana. Bhí sé ar intinn agam rud éigin a dhéanamh sa nuachtán trí Ghaeilge, agus leis an iarracht a chur tú isteach, bhí mé ábalta do leathanach seo a chur i gcló. Táim fíor buíoch! The wacky ravings of the Turbine can only be explained as being the work of Ryan Cullen. Helping me with things since April last year, Mr. Cullen has been a huge help to me with just being around an available to help when called upon. Thanks for everything Ryan! The Siren would not be possible without the help of a few people, but particularly Ms. Aoifa Smyth. Easily the stylish person I’ve ever met, Aoifa deserves the award for being the most organised person in this disorganised publication. I genuinely have learned a lot from reading over Aoifa’s section this year, and it is a shame now that we have to go our separate ways when I believe I was genuinely getting the hang of this fashion thing that she is so passionate about! Best of luck with your work experience and opportunities in the industry coming up. The job of Music Editor has been shared between a few people over the year! David Tracey deserves huge credit for putting his stamp on the position for the first few issues, and Conor McKenna deserves the plaudits as well for stepping in and helping out when called upon. Since Conor’s appendix burst (!), Joseph Conroy, Aonghus McGarry and Ciarán Leinster have stepped in to take the reins. Without the lads all listed, the music section would struggle to exist – thanks to everyone for their input over the year! Niamh Hanley deserves great credit for sticking with the Tribune and doing the painful job of

12 |

Sports Editor:

Mark Hobbs reading everything that is put to print. Her commitment over the year has been second to none. Thanks a million big sis! I can only give the utmost praise and thanks to one Eoghan Ó Braonáin for creating the facility for the UCD community to access The College Tribune online. A goal of mine from the start of the year, Eoghan made it a reality after putting in a huge effort. You created a great resource not only for me, but for the students of UCD as well. Go raibh míle maith agat mo chara! Of course none of the section editors listed would be able to do their work without their contributors, and so I’d like to thank everyone who has contributed to the paper this year. Some may have featured more prominently than others, but the efforts of every single writer is as important as any other. Without you all, there would be no paper. Thanks for helping make my job easier, and encourage you (and anyone reading this) get more involved with the Tribune and stay with us next year. On a personal note, there are a few people I would particularly like to thank who have helped me over the year. Former Tribune staff, James Grannell and Jim Scully have always been friendly faces to the paper over the year and good friends to me – thanks for all your support over the year. Thanks must be also given to Daniel McDonnell and Peter Lahiff, and to Simon Ward and Jennifer Bray, who, as my former editors, taught me so much and always were available this year for advice or even a tea/coffee to distract my attention when it was needed. Special thanks however goes to Philip Connolly, who has been not only a great help over the year, but a great friend. Thanks a million buddy, I actually hope United go on to win the league just for you!!!

Co-Music Editors: Joseph Conroy Ciarán Leinster & Aonghus McGarry

Fashion Editor:

Aoifa Smyth

Photography Editor: Dáire Brennan

Turbine Editor: Ryan Cullen

Eagarthóir Gaeilge: Eoghan O’ Murchadha

Copy Editor: Niamh Hanley

Cartoonist: Dan Daly

To my friends on campus, all of whom have been so supportive, thanks a million. Many people have been great in saying kind things to myself and my staff, and I genuinely appreciate the kindness shown over the year. Caithfidh mé buíochas a ghabháil le hEdel Ní Bhraonáin go háirithe, i gcónaí ag cabhrú liom agus ag úsáid mo ghuthán! To the people I love most: my family. Sometimes I would go days without seeing them due to the paper, but still, they would always be there for me, willing to help in any way. Thanks a million, and I hope to return the favour somehow! Within this group I include Lorraine Foy, the woman who knows better than anyone the strain and pressure of the job. Thanks for putting up with me during the tough times. I couldn’t have done my job without you in my life, and I love you very much. X Finally, to you, the readers of The College Tribune. Thank you for sticking with us this year. If you are reading this piece, you are likely to be one of our dedicated followers! This year the Tribune has undergone another face lift, and one, I hope, which has made the paper stronger. I believe we are more accessible and relate to the students a lot better than we previously have, through both our paper and our website, which has received over one million hits since being launched in February. The College Tribune is undergoing its most exciting phase since its foundation in 1988 by one Vincent Browne. I genuinely believe that we have the ability to be a crucial facet in the lives of UCD students. However in order to achieve this, we need your continued support. Whether it is simply picking up the paper, or expressing your interest in writing for the paper, this all contributes to help the Tribune become stronger. Whoever my successor(s) will be, I wish them the best of luck. The job that I leave behind me is in better condition than I received it in, and I can assure the readers of The College Tribune, the students and the staff of UCD, that The College Tribune is here to stay and to continue for many years to come.

It’s Satire Stupid! Inside Lyn-ham unable to deliver on election promise of campus wide halal food Rare breed of mushrooms spotted growing from UCD restaurant food Cosgrove runs naked through campus covered in lubricant, to the sound of pounding techno

Controversy Rises from UCD Ball ‘Negligence’ is the word being chanted by thousands of students as they take to the campus of Ireland’s largest University, in protest that Macy Gray is the only headline act announced for this year’s much talked about UCD Ball. The died out singer, once famous for her husky voice, spoke of her delight saying “The students were missing a ball and I decided to give them one, since I have at least three more in here”. In a press conference, Jonny Cosgrove spoke off their troubles in securing acts for what was once Europe’s largest private party, stating that “initially I tried my best to secure Joe Dolan to headline the UCD Ball, but to my dismay I found out that he had died, this

process took up two weeks of our time.” OH me Oh my. Acts such as Radiohead, Bright Eyes, The Athens effect and Bon Iver turned down lucrative offers to showcase their talents due to the grounds that they actually contain artistic integrity. Apart from Macy Gray taking to the stage, Barry Manilow and Gary Glitter are set to perform in front of thousands of youngsters with The UCD Gospel choir to perform ‘the sounds of Deadmau5’. Many students feel genuinely disappointed by the Students’ Union, feeling that they took the cheap and easy way out. One student even felt the need to set fi re to himself inside the Astra Hall, Tibetan monk style, but with more screaming. Although the SU still have not fi nalised the line-up, rumours are spreading about who is to make up the numbers with acts such as the Cartoons, Ace of Base and Belfast based punk band ‘Wankers Cramp’.

Tomorrow Never Dies Last night Rupert Murdoch sensationally bought The University Observer in the hope of turning it into Ireland’s leading media centre. His company News Corporation bought all shares and assets owned by the paper, changing the initial €50,000 funding to just over €730 million. In a brief statement, Murdoch claimed, “I don’t want to report the news, I wanna make the news”. His company plan to create the news and report on it seconds after occurring, making it Ireland’s fastest and most reliable source

of media. With many claiming that Rupert is slowly turning into Elliot Carter from the James Bond fi lm “Tomorrow Never Dies”, queries remain over the legal obligations and complications that he must overturn in his conquest to be the ultimate media guru. If you type Rupert Murdoch into google, the suggestions are ‘evil’ and ‘ jew’ (go ahead and try it), making the students of UCD and the Irish public wary of the intentions of the Aussie born freak. After becoming the new CEO of The University Observer, he quickly purchased the new student centre turning it the largest media complex on the island, intending to supply over 900,000 jobs. He aims to supply every student

within the ranks of UCD a job by the end of their degree a job regardless of speciality, turning UCD into a holding pen for, what he calls, Murdoch-ians. Hugh Brady welcomed the change saying “I have achieved guaranteed work for every student and I welcome Murdoch into our fi ne institution. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I am currently late for my private jet which is setting off to Barbados shortly.” The 80 year old is due to unveil his new building at the start of June, with the promise of a tour around the complex. After being spotted floating around the UCD library on his Segway, he was asked “So what do you wanna do tonight, Rupert?”, he replied “ Same thing we do every night, try to take over the world.”

“I’m free from all forms of racism, I hate chatting to foreigners” – From Lynam’s Seanad election leaflet Cellulite from Harneys thighs to pebbledash 40% of docklands. | 13

The College Tribune April 20th 2011

Leinster Roaring Under Reign of Schmidt




Greg Acton



With Leinster facing a Heineken Cup semi-final against Toulouse, and looking set to compete in the Magners League end of season play-offs, coach Joe Schmidt talks to Colman Hanley about his exciting first season to date


It’s a Friday afternoon and with only around 24 hours to go till Leinster’s crunch Magners League clash with Ulster. Should Leinster suffer a defeat to their provincial rivals, their hopes of claiming the Magners crown, and a possible domestic double (not achieved since London Wasps in 2004), will be fast fading away. However despite the pressure of preparations for the big match, The College Tribune phone rings – it’s Joe Schmidt on the line. Luckily, the brief conversation appeared to have little or any negative effect as Leinster subsequently go on to notch a bonus point win on a scoreline of 34-26, which almost secures them a home Magners League semi-fi nal. A showdown with Munster looks likely to be on the cards for Leinster’s New Zealand born coach. Recent high profi le victories has earned Schmidt much praise, however this is a huge change to the criticism received earlier in the season, with many so-called experts quick to criticise Schmidt after one win from the opening four games of the season. But a 13-10 win over bitter rivals Munster in the Aviva Stadium, followed up by a fi ne start to the Heineken Cup, silenced the doubters and kick started Leinster’s season. Schmidt admits to having found the adjustment in coaching to have been difficult – quite a difference to his previous tenure at French side Clermont Auvergne, where he worked as the backs coach. However the move was not his fi rst foray into Irish life having having moved here with his family to work with Mullingar Rugby Club previously, a contrasting job to his current one. “It was a lot different to be honest with you. It was a small town lifestyle there which was fantastic, and I come from a small town in New Zealand. The Mullingar people really adopted us and we had a fantastic time; it gave us an opportunity to see most of Ireland and travel all around the country. We then moved to Europe, had a look around and it was a fantastic time

14 |

for us. We were pretty young at the time, and I’m an old man now. It’s a lot different to come back with four kids in toe, and the responsibilites of a position which is somewhat more visible than in Mullingar.” Leinster’s quarter-fi nal victory over Leicester showed similar glimpses of class that was seen in their run to winning the Heineken Cup in 2009. However while that may be the case, Schmidt cited poor fi nishing from his side as an area which they must improve, citing three try opportunities missed in the game, commenting “for us not to fi nish them, was pretty disappointing.” The Leinster defence however, an aspect of the side’s game which has been consistently solid, was praised by Schmidt. “The one big strong point for us was that we were really happy with our defensive work, they had a number of times where they got to twelve and fourteen phases of play, but didn’t really get massive gains in yardage gain. We worked really hard off the ball.” So how about Leinster’s semi-fi nal opponents, Toulouse? Had Schmidt any master plans he wished to reveal? Not really. “We haven’t really looked at that game yet… we’ll start to have a look at the game and decipher where we think we can attack them. I know with Toulouse, they are a very strong counter attacking side, they work very strong up front, we’re going to have to be competitive at scrum time, while their line-out is very good with Bouilhou and Albacete.” The list of Toulouse players which Schmidt went on to make reference to, particularly their prominent French international players, would rightly scare most sides across Europe; Poitrenaud, Dusautoir, Fritz, Jauzion, and Servat are all world class players. However during his time at Clermont, Schmidt encountered these players regularly. Looking at his record in the South of France, four top 14 fi nals in the last four years he was there (claiming victory in his fi nal season), there is little doubt that Schmidt has

the expertise and astuteness to know how to plan the demise of Guy Noves’ side. However the downfall of many Irish sides, both at provincial and international level, has been the traditional weakness in the scrum and set-piece area. Before linking up with Leinster last summer, Schmidt openly talked about the difference between Leinster and Toulouse in last year’s Heineken Cup semi-fi nal, a game which the province lost 26-16 in Le Stadium. Commenting at the time, Schmidt spoke of Leinster being unable to “access the game” and having been “shut out” by the French side’set piece. Fast forward a year, and Schmidt went on to explain the importance of the scrumage area in the French game and the dignity they have for it, before highlighting the improvement that Leinster have made in the scrum this season. “Culturally, I think with the French, you can lose the game, but if you win the scrum, the prop walks off the pitch with a smile on his face. They take a massive amount of pride in the scrum and see it as giving a heck of a lot of confidence to people on the field.” “For us to compete with that, I think Greg Feek has been pivotal and he’s brought some scrum nous to what we’re doing. In the games we’ve played this year, Leicester had a very strong scrum. They have an English International tighthead, Italian international tighthead, they have a quality of player at an international level across the board in their pack, and I think we stood up pretty well to them.” With approximately 90% of the Aviva stadium set to be in blue for the April 30th clash, due to Toulouse taking up only 4,000 of their ticket allocation, the Leinster scrum is sure to get a bit more strength and energy from the noise that the strong home support will make. As for one Josef Schmidt, he could be on the cusp of making history from the sidelines in just his fi rst season as coach.

This is it folks. This season’s very last Superleague report. I’ll try not to get emotional. Congratulations to H-Bam, Just Jeff and Bean FC who were all crowned champions of their respective leagues. Just Jeff sealed the Premier Sunday title with a comprehensive win over We Like Young Boys, H-Bam conquered the Premier Saturday with a whopping 16 goals in their last two games, and Bean FC romped home in Division 1 Saturday with a 6-1 drubbing of Virgin Orient. Forget Arsenal in 03/04, this year’s Superleague produced a team truly deserving of the name ‘The Invincibles’. Division 1 Saturday champs, Bean FC went the entire season without losing a game. And unlike Arsenal, they were forced to deal with major setbacks, like hangovers and a severe lack of fitness. If Bean now go on to do the double and win the Bank of Ireland Cup, might they go down as the best Superleague team of all time? The league championships may all be decided but it’s still all to play for in the two Superleague cups. LM Mountaineers will contest the League Cup fi nal with The Absolute Gents or Special Olympiakos. Meanwhile, the Bank of Ireland Cup is into the semi-fi nal stage with Sauce Pan Celtic, ABCDE FC, Bean FC and the brilliantly named AC Alittlesiluettoofmilan, making up the fi nal four. The following are my totally unofficial Superleague awards 2011. There are no prizes. First off, ‘Keeper of the Year goes to Conor Kenny of Virgin Orient. Despite the amount of unwarranted abuse he has received in this column every week, Defender of the Year has to go to Bean’s rampaging left-back Paul Geraghty. Neil Cowzer of Sauce Pan Celtic, who’s goals and assists have often been wrongly credited to the fi rst person that popped into my head, is my pick for Midfielder of the Year. Forward of the Year is without doubt, Bean’s Conor Foley. Team Name of the Year was a close call but I’m giving it to Exither Quickly, although Murder on Zidane’s Floor definitely deserve a mention! Finally, Jersey of the Year has to go to the ‘campest team in football’, the Back Door Bouncers for their outrageous luminous pink attire. FAB-U-LOUS! And so ends another season of the UCD Superleague. With real football fi nished, we’ll all be forced to turn our attention to the Champions League. YAWN! As a wise person once said though, don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it’s happened. Can anyone honestly say, they have found a better hangover cure than running around the GAA astro fi xated by 21 other glow-in-the-dark-jerseys. Broken bones, vuvuzelas, and crossbar challenges. It’s been quite a journey people! Long live the Superleague!


UCD’s Perfect Season Denied by Determined Trinity


Patrick Fleming


Dublin University 31 UCD 22 With an unbeaten season, the Division Two title, and the pride of defeating old rivals all on the line for UCD in Saturday’s annual Colours Match, it was the team from Trinity that showed the intensity necessary to edge out the victory in Donnybrook on Saturday. It all began positively for UCD, and when winger Terry Jones went over for the fi rst try of the game after only four minutes, it began to look as if the afternoon was going to be a mere victory lap for the Belfield side. Trinity, however, showed superb resolve to shake off this early setback and establish their dominance up front. This display of brute force eventually earned them a penalty which fullback James O’Donoghue, coolly slotted over with the left boot. With another penalty from O’Donoghue shortly after, the margin decreased to a single point, and Trinity began to take hold

of the game. Despite this, UCD always looked dangerous once the game became open. They showed this when a blistering move saw them squander two chances for a try, one in the left corner and then one in the right, fi nally fi nished when a looping pass from Thornton found Jones who went over for his second try of the game. Thornton couldn’t add the conversion however. Trinity once again began to build up a degree of control over the game with fl ankers Scott Le Valla and Dominic Gallagher tearing apart the UCD defensive line. Another O’Donoghue penalty was followed by Trinity’s fi rst try of the game on 30 minutes. True to the manner in which Trinity had played much of the fi rst half, it was a clinical display of power, as a maul off of the lineout drove effortlessly over the UCD line for the try with prop Ian Hurst getting the touchdown. The game still remained tight and with UCD scoring a penalty just before the interval, the game was poised nicely at 15–16 in favour

of Trinity. The second half began scrappily, as both teams became squared up in a war of attrition in midfield. The cut-up Donnybrook pitch was doing its part to add to the brawl mentality as every ruck and tackle was shrouded in a cloud of dust. In fact, the only score during the fi rst twenty minutes of the half came from the boot of O’Donoghue as he added another three points to his, and Trinity’s, tally. As the half wore on it was becoming evident that Trinity were gaining the upper hand as every UCD ruck was being squeezed, and service to the backs was effectively cut off by the constant pressure. Trinity made this count as they pulled out to the fi rst significant lead of the match and Pierce Byrne went over from close range with thirteen minutes to go. Still though, the ebb and flow of the game once again conspired to keep the game tight. This time it was a superb individual effort from UCD’s captain, Andy Cummiskey, as he broke the Trinity defence and sprinted 60 metres to score under the posts. With the conver-

Trinity rose highest in their defeat of UCD last weekend; Colin McDonnell (DCU) beats Brian Cawley (UCD) to the lineout ball. Photo: Matt Browne/ SPORTSFILE

sion, the Trinity lead was suddenly just two. The game took one last fi nal turn against UCD though, as a penalty try was awarded to Trinity for a cynical obstruction by scrum half, Rob Shanley, on Paddy McCabe as he chased his kick into the UCD goal area. The fi nal whistle was greeted with jubilation by the Trinity contingent as they fi nished with 31 points to UCD’s 22. “It was a good game but Trinity just edged it at the breakdown and were able to slow the ball at ruck time and reduce our attacking options” remarked John McClean who is retiring at the end of this season as UCD Director of Rugby. The loss, combined with Ballynahinch’s victory over Old Wesley, means that Ballynahinch have pipped UCD to the post for the division 2 title but captain Andy Cummiskey was optimistic about the future. “It’s a bitter pill to swallow but there are a lot of positives from this year and we’ll be looking to build on those for next year.” Indeed, with their second place

fi nish, UCD will be going up to division 1B next year and certainly have the momentum of this extraordinary season, even if it did fall just short of perfection, with them. UCD: John A Lee; Risteard Byrne; Brian Hall; Brian Cawley; Mark Flanagan; Shane Grannell; Danny Kenny; Kevin Croke; Rob Shanley; James Thornton; Tom Fletcher; David McSharry; Andy Cummiskey (Capt); Terry Jones; Michael Twomey. Replacements: Kieran Maloney; Andy Pollard; Richie Bent; David Doyle; Niall Earls; Shane O’Meara. Dublin University: Ian Hurst; Tim O’Mahony; James Gethings; Colin MacDonnell; Pierce Byrne; Scott La Valla (Capt); Dominic Gallagher; Johnny Iliff; Michael McLoughlin; David Joyce; Shane Hanratty; Tim McCoy; Ciaran Wade; Neil Hanratty; James O’Donoghue. Replacements: Sam Bell; Conor Colclough; Alan Mathews; Craig Telford; Paddy McCabe.

Belfield FM is currently seeking applications for the position of : Station Manager

Assistant Station Manager(s)

The position is part-time and will run from June 2011 to

The position of Assistant Station Manager is part-time and

June 2012. Applicants, (preferably current or recent stu-

will run from June 2011 to June 2012. Applicants, who should

dents of UCD) would need to be familiar with the activi-

preferably be current or recent students of UCD would need

ties of the Students’ Union and other student bodies and

to be familiar with the activities of the Students’ Union and

with the details of the |University’s organisation. Previous

other student bodies and with the details of the |University’s

experience in broadcasting is desirable but not essential.

organisation. Previous experience in broadcasting is desirable

Responsibilities include:

but not essential.

General station management.

Coordinating with college and

Responsibilities include:

institutional authorities.

Coordinating the day to day running of the station under

Marketing, publicity and sponsorship.

Recruitment, selection and supervision

Ensuring volunteer compliance with station policy.

of volunteer personnel.

Organising training sessions.

Develop future plans for the continued

Marketing and publicity.

growth of the station in consultation with the board

Other activities the Station Manager deems applicable.

the guidance of the Station Manager.

of directors. •

Licensing and compliance.

The remuneration for the position is under review but will be in

Supervising Assistant Manager(s) and team leading.

line with previous practice.

The remuneration for the position is under review but will

Unsuccessful applicants for the Station Manager position may

be in line with previous practice.

be offered a position as Assistant Station Manager

All applicants must submit a CV and Cover Letter including an outline plan for station broadcast schedule consisting of weekly show schedule and overall yearly broadcast schedule. Closing date for applications are Friday the 22nd April before 2pm. Interviews will be held Thursday the 28th April in the UCD Student Centre.

Please send CV & Cover Letter to | 15


The College Tribune April 6th 2011

Heartbreak for College ››

Joe Schmidt, Leinster Coach ››

No Show Like a Joe Show

Trinity win Colours clash

Interview page 14

Report page 15



UCD Fight Back to Take Late Point


Patrick Fleming


Saint Pat's Ian Daly steals the ball from UCD keeper Ger Barron to score, but his effort is ruled offside. Photo: Matt Browne/SPORTSFILE St. Patrick’s Athletic UCD

1 1

Richmond Park A late 94th minute goal from Graham Rusk gave UCD a crucial point and end their four match losing streak. Rusk’s late strike, his fi rst goal of the season, earned Martin Russell’s a point after Anto Murphy’s 44th minute effort had given the Saints a fi rst half lead. The home side featured seven former UCD players, and are managed by former UCD manager and College Tribune columnist, Pete Mahon. However despite creating more goal scoring opportunities than the Students, the Inchicore side failed to seal the three points when opportunities arose. The Saints controlled the fi rst half as UCD struggled to create any clear-cut chances themselves and were left to defend for large parts. On 17 minutes, former

16 |

UCD skipper Evan McMillan went close to breaking the deadlock, but his header from a Shane McFaul corner went over Ger Barron’s crossbar. Former Manchester City striker Ian Daly had the ball in the visitors net on the half hour, but his strike was ruled out for off side. The home side’s support was further disgruntled on 34 minutes as they were denied a penalty after Derek Doyle’s shot struck the arm of Paul O’Conor. However despite the protestations of the Pat’s players, referee Paul Tuite waved away any appeals. Shortly afterwards though, the Saints took the lead. Danny North did well to beat Ciarán Nangle on the left, before crossing for Daly, whose pull back set up Murphy for an easy fi nish from inside the six yard box. Despite fi nishing the fi rst half strongly though, the Saints failed to match their earlier dominance and UCD were able to get a foothold in the game. On

57 minutes, O’Conor’s cross found Mark Langtry, and his header across goal picked out Dean Marshall. With only a fi nish from six yards required, Marshall somehow miskicked as the chance went abegging. Daly had a chance to seal the points for the Saints ten minutes later, but after capitalising on an O’Conor mistake, he blazed his shot over the bar when a second goal seemed certain. However UCD kept plugging away, and on 81 minutes, they created another great opportunity. Pushing on to try and create the equaliser, Nangle pushed on from his left back position to cross for substitute Samir Belhout. Meeting Nangle’s fantastic cross with his head, Belhout’s header though was somehow tipped around the post by Saints netminder Gary Rogers. The Saints had a golden opportunity to seal the win again on 89 minutes, but after striker Danny North had been put through one-on-one on goal, he put his chance over the bar with only Ger Barron to beat.

However their was drama still to come. With four minutes injury time awarded, UCD pounced in the fi nal minute of the game as Darren Meenan teed up Rusk who fi nished past Rogers to give the Students a deserved late equaliser. UCD face a second consecutive away Dublin derby as they travel to Tallaght Stadium to face league champions, Shamrock Rovers. Kick-off is at 8pm. St. Pat’s: Rogers, Pender, Bermingham, E McMillan, Shorthall; Murphy (Kavanagh 90), McFaul, Mulcahy (Crowley 57), Doyle, North, Daly (D McMillan). Subs not used: Bennion, Bradley, Keegan, Flood. UCD: Barron, P O’Conor, Nangle, D O’ Connor, Leahy (c); Corry (Ledwith 67), Langtry (Belhout 67), Creevy, Rusk, Marshall (Benson 77), Meenan. Subs not used: Harding, Kavanagh, McGinley. Attendance: 994. Referee: Paul Tuite.

Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.