The Captain’s Log
Student protest erupts outside YAF event
A group of students posing with thier handmade signs in McMurran Hall, photo courtesy of Ellora Houchins /TheCaptainsLog
Campus speaker sparks free speech controversy
ELLORA HOUCHINS
ELLORA.HOUCHINS.24@CNU.EDU
Christopher Newport University’s Young Americans for Freedom (YAF) hosted an event in McMurran Hall on March 25. Former swimmer for the University of Kentucky Kaitlynn Wheeler addressed issues regarding transgender athletes competing in women’s sports. Wheeler, an Ambassador for The Riley Gaines Center at the
Leadership Institute, advocates for upholding women’s right to privacy, safety and equal opportunity, as stated in her ambassador bio. The event quickly caused discourse on CNU’s Yik Yak, with many students anonymously posting their distaste with Wheeler’s appearance on campus.
Sitting outside of McMurran 101, students were protesting the event with post-
ers. Junior Alli Butler held a sign saying “NO ONE is FREE when others are OPPRESSED.”
“I understand that CNU wants to be equal to both political parties on campus, but I feel like this is crossing a line,” she said after being asked about her general thoughts regarding the event.
(Story continued in News, page 2)
International Affairs Update:
ELLORA HOUCHINS
ELLORA.HOUCHINS.24@CNU.EDU
Devastating earthquake in Myanmar
On Friday, March 28, a massive 7.7 magnitude earthquake rocked Myanmar and caused extensive damages and casualties. The death toll numbers are expected to increase, AP News stated while affirming 2,719 deaths as of April 1. The head of Myanmar’s military government, Gen. Min Aung Hlaing, told a forum for relief donations Friday’s earthquake was the second most powerful in the country’s history, after a magnitude 8 hit the coast in May 1912. The World Health Organization declared more than 10,000 buildings are known to have collapsed. The earthquake also hit neighboring Thailand, primarily a high rise construction site. Authorities in Bangkok released that overall, there are 21 deaths and 34 injuries, the majority which come from the collapse of the site. Relief efforts are coming in slowly. AP News reported on April 1, Chinese rescuers were seen saving four people before a building collapsed from aftershocks. Other international rescue teams from several countries, including Russia, India and the United Arab Emirates, have been reported on the scene. The U.S. Embassy claimed an American team had been sent as of Tuesday but had not arrived yet. Meantime, multiple countries have promised millions in assistance to help Myanmar recover. AP News recalled that even before the earthquake, more than 3 million people had been displaced from their homes by Myanmar’s brutal civil war. The war started in 2021 and as of the quake, is still current.
Russia’s massive military call-up
BBC reported Tuesday, on April 1, that President Vladmir Putin has called up 160,000 men between the ages of 18 and 30. The number is Russia’s highest number of conscripts since 2011. The call-up came several months after Putin claimed Russia should increase the overall size of its military to 2.39 million and 1.5 million active servicemen. The spring draft will take place despite U.S. attempts to forge a ceasefire in the Ukraine-Russia war. Despite this, BBC reported on Tuesday, Ukraine officials claim a Russian attack has left 45,000 people in Kherson without electricity. The maximum age of Russia’s draft increased from 27 to 30 at the beginning of last year. However, this is not the first time Putin has declared an up-scale in Russia’s military. BBC noted that since he declared troops to capture Ukraine in 2022. BBC and Mediazona have verified that since 2022, Moscow has lost more than 100,000 soldiers.
Construction at CNU continues
Students around campus share their opinions on the construction of the newest academic building on campus
DARBY SHROUT
DARBY.SHROUT.24@CNU.EDU
At Christopher Newport University (CNU), construction has been underway for the newest academic building on campus, The Science and Engineering Research Center, for about a year and a half. Students across the campus are excited about this new architectural feat, but struggle with the constant noise it produces. The new building holds promise for Science, technology, engineering and mathematics (STEM) students, with new facilities dedicated to scientific research and experimentation. Sophomore and Business Management major Evan Anderegg said, “It’s going to be really good for the science and business department in general…It will be a big draw for science majors.”
However, some students find it difficult to follow a daily routine. “I currently live in Warwick River Hall, on the first floor, directly across from the construction, and it is a nightmare. The amount of times me and my roommate have been woken up way too early and it’s still dark out when they are doing construction is crazy,” said sophomore Tatum Foster. Foster stated that she was excited for the construction to be over, but that she is not likely to be able to use the new facilities because of the projected completion of the building.
According to Glavé & Holmes’ website, the building is to be dedicated to departments in Biology, Chemistry, Environmental Science and Physics, and will feature classrooms and laboratories that are open for student and faculty interaction. This new academic building will expand the campus and the departments it intends to house, but some students cannot help but reminisce about the field the space used to be.
“I just remember there were a lot of trees, and people would have their hammocks, or they would just sit out there and eat, like how they do on the Great Lawn now,” said junior Rachel Murphy. Murphy adds that the greenery added to the overall beauty of the campus, and now they are replacing it with a large structure.
Many of the students felt like the construction zone was an inconvenience for them at one point or another while in attendance at the university.
“Now that I live on east campus it’s not that bad. I lived in Warwick last year when they were first starting. It was really loud and we would get woken up at 7 or 7:30 every morning and it was really annoying, especially when they were leveling the ground,” junior Amanda Barlow said.
There are also worries of the construction disturbances impacting classroom learning and academics. Junior Ella Salzman had several classes in Luter Hall at CNU, right next to the construction. “The construction outside was really loud and we would have to take breaks in the lecture because of how loud and obnoxious it was. Honestly it made it really hard to understand a lot of the lecture,” Salzman said.
Many students noted how the classrooms near the work zone often shook during the hours of operation, and how that was a distraction during classes. “It’s only happened once where it has been distracting in class. Other than that I’m excited, I just wish it wasn’t outside my building” said Foster.
“I know it’ll go away eventually, so it doesn’t really bother me that much,” freshman Sarah Paisley said.
The Science and Research Center is slated to be completed by the Spring of 2026.
The on going construction at Christopher Newport University outside of Commons Dining Hall, photo taken by Darby Shrout.
Student protest erupts outside YAF event
Story continued from cover
ELLORA HOUCHINS
ELLORA.HOUCHINS.24@CNU.EDU
“This is discriminating against people who exist and are happy here, and they’re now being forced to feel unsafe because they know their peers hate them. As an institution, [CNU] shouldn’t be spreading this message,” Butler said.
Butler wasn’t the only student protesting the event. Seniors Jed Stephenson, Stella Burnett, Alysia Alexander, sophomore Cooper Bowden and freshman Mia Plude sat outside the lecture hall.
Wheeler advocates for her younger sister, Abbigail, who was “exposed to a man in the women’s locker room at her local YMCA in Springfield, Illinois.” Abbigail, who is also an ambassador, claims that after she spoke out, the YMCA kicked her off of the team and banned the Wheeler family from the location. Stephenson disagrees with Kaitlynn’s claims about Abbigail’s story and how YAF marketed the event.
In a 2023 Washington Times article that discussed Abbigail’s protest, Abbigail clarified that she didn’t see the person without clothes nor with exposed genitalia, contrary to some reports. A report was never filed with the YMCA and no investigation took place. Similarly, Lou Bart, the communications director of Springfield’s YMCA during this time, said accusations of Abbigail being banned and removed from the YMCA are false. According to the Times article, “[t]he swimmer’s family informed the YMCA through email that they would be leaving the YMCA and their swimmer would no longer participate on the swim team.”
Stephenson discussed this article after expressing how Wheeler’s event was not attempting to inform students of an actual story, but rather trying to demonize a group of people.
“Misconstruing both of those parts of Abbigail’s story on all of the material that was used to market for the event at CNU leads me to believe that the speaker (or at the very least those who organized the event at CNU) were doing so in bad faith,” Stephenson put in an email a day after the event. He shared the link to the Washington Times article and expanded on his statement from the night before.
“I understand that Kaitlynn receives monetary compensation for telling this story, so of course she would do it,” he wrote. “As for those at CNU responsible for setting up the event, I hope you find peace,” Stephenson said.
The conversation of controversial events is not a recent development. Last semester, Students for Life (SFL) hosted Lydia Taylor Davis to dis-
cuss the pro-life generation and anti-abortion themes. SFL was notably tabling outside of the lecture room as students started to make their way inside. Butler remarked on the SFL event, which opened the discussion of political speakers on campus.
“If CNU wants political speakers on campus, they should be actual politicians or government representatives and not influencers spreading hate speech,” she said.
Those who protested the event aren’t the only ones who agree. Anonymous posts on Yik Yak
“If CNU wants political speakers on campus, they should be actual politicians or government representatives and not influencers spreading hate speech.”
share similar thoughts and have been since last October. Davis, although a spokesperson and social media coordinator for Students for Life, has no political experience. Davis reached recognition after a TikTok stitch to one of her videos by a popular creator went viral. Similarly, Wheeler gained popularity after former teammate Riley Gaines was recognized by President Donald Trump for her activism towards creating “safer environments for women,” as stated on her center’s webpage.
Plude, one of the students counter protesting, shared their distaste Tuesday evening over YAF’s event being considered a Presidential Leadership Program Discovery Event. “We talk so much in our leadership classes about how leaders need to connect with individuals and recognize their followers as human,” they said.
Bowden, a member of the Young Democratic Socialists of America at CNU, opened a discussion by commenting on the Strategic Compass and its core values. In a recent CNUpdate, President Kelly informed students on implementing the Strategic Compass. In the email, he emphasized the Compass’ priority of “inclusion and belonging” and highlighted a direct quote from
the Compass’ website: “Our university will provide opportunities and embrace all who wish to belong and thrive in a community committed to inclusion, accessibility, and excellence.”
President Kelly continued to discuss how a new Inclusive Excellence Council is considering adjustments in the language and scope of programs that are key to CNU’s culture. However, he clarified that what won’t be changing is his goal for CNU to become the most inclusive university in Virginia.
Bowden shared his concerns after commenting on the Strategic Compass. He explained that allowing these “Astro-TERF speakers”–a pun on astroturf (‘fake’ grass) and the acronym TERF (Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminist)–on campus makes it less of a safe space for marginalized communities who are already at high risk of harassment and suicide.
After the event concluded, The Captain’s Log was able to collect afterward thoughts from a few students who listened to Wheeler.
“I tried to come into this with an open mind, as a STEM major,” senior Kaeden Yoder said, “but none of [Wheeler’s] points are inherently biological at all.”
Throughout the lecture, Wheeler had a homemade sign taped behind her which displayed XX ≠ XY, the signs of female and male chromosomes, respectively. The symbol also represents Riley Gaines’ Project BOYcott. Yoder asked her about genetic abnormalities, such as Kleinfelter syndrome and Turner syndrome, which he explained. Yoder claimed Wheeler ignored his questioning and diverted to “males are males and females are females.”
Another student, freshman Ben Gilman, shared that he agrees with not having trans females in women’s sports.
“There’s an issue with records and medals being taken away from women who try so hard,” he said. However, Gilman disagrees with how Wheeler expresses her message. By tying it to politics, she messes up the message of protecting women. Gilman believes that whenever the subject diverted from sports, such as politics, Wheeler couldn’t articulate anything well.
The Captain’s Log was unable to sit in on Kaitlynn Wheeler’s lecture due to conflicting time schedules. When asked if a staff writer could listen for the remaining 15 minutes, a nearby officer declined entrance. CNU’s YAF thanked everyone who showed up in an Instagram post the following day. The caption declared free speech from all perspectives is back on our campus.
Former FIFA executives cleared
A lengthy decision
TREY GREENWELL
TRAJAN.GREENWELL.21@CNU.EDU
Two former football executives, International Federation of Association Football (FIFA) President Sepp Blatter and Union of European Football Associations (UEFA) President Michel Platini, have been cleared of all corruption charges.
The decision came almost two and a half years after the pair were initially acquitted. They had been charged for fraud, forgery, mismanagement and misappropriation of €2.1 million paid by Blatter to Platini in February 2011 for supplementary and noncontact salary work as a presidential advisor between 1998 and 2002. Platini had said that the payments were deferred as FIFA did not have the funds to pay him in full at the time. A federal criminal appeals court in Switzerland supported
Platini’s claim as they deemed the method of payment legal. While the attorney general’s office was initially pushing for a 20-month suspended sentence, they were able to convince the court that the funds were used for legitimate consultancy work.
Details of the payment first emerged in May 2015 when American federal investigators found evidence against international football officials. This led to several arrests being made in Zurich and the seizing of several FIFA financial and business records.
Prior to the scandal, Platini had been tipped to succeed Blatter as FIFA President. However, both were suspended by the FIFA Ethics committee in October 2015, resulting in Blatter’s impeachment and Gianni Infantino being elected as the
next president on Feb. 26. 2016. Since Blatter’s impeachment, he has been banned for six years which started on Mar. 24. 2021. It was the second six year ban he had received from FIFA as the first was a reduced suspension from eight years to six that began on Feb. 24. 2016. However, this is not the first time Blatter had received a sanction from FIFA as he is currently exiled from football until late 2028 as a result of a self prosecution that accused Blatter and other high-ranking officials of awarding themselves large pay raises and World Cup bonuses that reached north of $80 million.
Ovechkin edges closer to record
The gr8 chase
GARRETT.GOLDBERGER.22@CNU.EDU
Alex Ovechkin is widely regarded as one of the best players in recent history, if not, of all time. Since 2004, he has blessed hockey fans with incredible highlights, amazing goals and funny moments. Even with Ovechkin’s many accomplishments, many people have doubted his abilities, claiming that he was never good enough to win a championship and truly cement himself as one of the greats. That doubt was squashed when he won the Stanley Cup in 2018, giving him a key addition to his Hall of Fame career. Now his sights are on something much bigger: the National Hockey League (NHL) goals record. This record, achieved previously by Wayne Gretzky (894 goals), is a record that has stood for over 30 years. However,
Ovechkin has been steadily catching up to Gretzky as he currently sits only five goals away from having the record. With Ovechkin sitting at 890 goals in his career, he is on the cusp of being placed into hockey immortality. Washington Capitals fans, and the National Hockey League as a whole, have been watching each and every game he plays in to see if he will score and continue this historic chase. This has led to ESPN+ producing an alternative presentation of select Capitals games called OviCast, a way for hockey fans to closely monitor Ovechkin’s pursuit of greatness. Each OviCast features an isolated camera on Ovechkin in one box with record-breaking information below it paired with the game in a different box.
Many people wondered if
Ovechkin could reach this historic milestone this season. With Ovechkin being on the older side of a hockey career at 39 years old and 42 goals away from the record prior to this season, many fans thought he did not have enough in him to make history. However, he is currently sitting at 37 goals as of writing, and with nine games left in the season, everyone is awaiting the moment where he enters hockey immortality.
Sepp Blatter speaks to the press after meeting with President Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva at the Planalto Palace. Sepp Blatter by Agencia Brasil is licensed under the CC By Attribution 3.0 Brazil Deed.
Washington Capitals captain Alex Ovechkin during a game against the Pittsburgh Penguins, December 19, 2018, at Capital One Arena in Washington, D.C. Alex Ovechkin by Michael Miller is licensed under the CC By Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International Deed.
Remembering George Foreman
A heavyweight legend
Former heavyweight boxing champion George Foreman has passed away at 76 years old.
The statement given by his family did not provide a cause of death as he was described as having peacefully died surrounded by loved ones. Foreman’s life will always be remembered by many as he was also a pastor and a businessman.
The height of Foreman’s boxing career came in 1973, when he defeated Joe Frazier to win the heavyweight belt. Foreman was then able to defend his title twice through knockout victories against Jose Roman and Ken Norton. His third title defense was against Muhammad Ali in the fight that was later dubbed “The Rumble in the Jungle,” which Ali won by knockout. This fight was one of the biggest upsets in boxing history that made Ali a legend. Despite returning to the ring in 1974 after a yearlong hiatus, Foreman was unable to win the belt back.
In 1977, Foreman retired from boxing to become an ordained minister where he founded The Church of the Lord Jesus Christ in his hometown, Houston, Texas. During his retirement,
one against Light Heavyweight and Cruiserweight Champion Dwight Muhammad Qawi. The comeback reached new heights when Foreman defeated Michael Moorer to become the oldest heavyweight champion at 45 years old. After compiling a 76-5 record, Foreman retired from boxing and became a Home Box Office (HBO) commentator. He also launched the George Foreman Grill, an electric grill that has sold over 100 million units worldwide.
Coming soon in CNU Sports:
*Games listed are happening at CNU
April 4th:
*Men’s Tennis
CNU v. Averet University
Location: Newport News, VA
Time: 10:00 AM
Women’s Softball
“Foreman’s life will always be remembered by many as he was also a pastor and a businessman.”
Foreman founded the George Foreman Youth and Community Center, a non-profit organization that assisted children in need. The Center helped several individuals in his hometown as it offered various sporting activities as well as mentorship and guidance for the youth.
With financial troubles emerging, Foreman returned to the ring in 1987, nearly ten years after his last fight. At the age of 38, many expected Foreman to struggle initially. However, Foreman proved his critics wrong by winning 13 bouts over the next year, including
Foreman’s impact on boxing will always be remembered. In an era where Muhammad Ali and Joe Frazier were in their prime, Foreman was able to secure the heavyweight championship. His comeback was even more impressive as he had to change his boxing style to one that was less intense and allowed him to stay competitive for 12 rounds. This adjustment separated Foreman from other boxers as he showed that he was able to compete in multiple eras. Today, George Foreman leaves behind a strong legacy in both boxing and his local community.
CNU v. Randolph-Macon College
Location: Ashland, VA
Time: 2:30 and 5:00 PM
April 5th:
*Women’s Tennis
CNU v. Virginia Wesleyan University
Location: Newport News, VA
Time: 12:00 PM
*Men’s Baseball
CNU v. Salisbury University
Location: Newport News, VA
Time: 2:00 PM
Women’s Lacrosse
CNU v. Roanoke College
Location: Salem, VA
Time: 2:00 PM
To look at events off campus and for future weeks, visit cnusports.com
George Foreman speaking at the 2016 FreedomFest at Planet Hollywood in Las Vegas, Nevada. George Foreman by Gage Skidmore is licensed under the CC
By Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic Deed.
TheatreCNU’s Annual Dance Concert
Sarah Gingerich, Kylee Bates, Abby Stephens, Hannah Cecil and Rebecca Lloyd dancing to “YaYa,” choreographed by Abby Stephens
Kate Bentov, Lara Elkhalifa, Gwen Hawdon, Annalee Holstege, Victoria Johnson and Makenna Mitchell performing “My Angel,” choreographed by Gwen Hardon
Kylee Bates, Gwen Hawdon, Anthony Hearn, Jaime LaFever, Jess Langhorne, Madison Lookado and Imani Smart performing “ADHD,” choreographed by Madison Lookado
Kate Bentov, Victoria Johnson, Rebecca Lloyd and Abby Stephens performing “Mykonos,” cheoreographed by Rebecca Lloyd
Left: Hannah Cecil, Gwen Hawdon, Jamie LaFever, Grace McCoy and Makenna Mitchell performing “The Storm in Me,” choreographed by guest choreographer Rachel Bell Carpenter
CAB’s Petting Zoo
Two pigs huddled together at the petting zoo, taken by Claire Hall/TheCaptainsLog
A goat staring at the camera, taken by Nicole Nwazuruokeh
Two ducks at the petting zoo, taken by Maggie Gammons/ TheCaptainsLog
CNU student Olivia Fadeley posing for a photo with a miniture horse, taken by Maggie Gammons/TheCaptainsLog
Marvel reveals the cast of “Avengers: Doomsday”
ALYSSA TILLMAN
ALYSSA.TILLMAN.22@CNU.EDU
Marvel Studios announced the cast of “Avengers: Doomsday” on the official Marvel YouTube last Wednesday at 8 a.m. PST. The fivehour-plus livestream was their biggest announcement yet, pulling in 275M digital views and 3.1M social mentions.
27 cast members were revealed on the backs of a line of director’s chairs one by one. There were a couple of cheeky moments, such as the reveal of a tiny director’s chair for Paul Rudd as Ant-Man, and some changes in the music. At the end of the livestream, the music swelled dramatically and a door opened in an out-of-focus section of the video. A silhouetted man walked down the row of chairs to take a seat in his spot, with the camera panning to reveal “Robert Downey Jr.” on the back of the chair. Downey himself then turned to camera, made a shushing motion, gestured to the chairs, and walked off.
The feed then changed to reveal a title card reading “Marvel Studio’s
Studios’ Avengers: Doomsday Now In Production.” Downey later posted to social media, “That’s what you call a deep bench of talent…actually it’s more like a row, but an extra long one…that must be it…right?” Marvel Studios’ responded, “There’s always room for more…”
The cast members announced included “The Fantastic Four: First Steps” cast Pedro Pascal , Vanessa Kirby, Joseph Quinn and Ebon MossBachrach. 20th Century Fox/Marvel X-Men cast member OGs Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Alan Cumming, Rebecca Romijn, James Marsden, Kelsey Grammer and Channing Tatum were also announced.
There were also seats set out for Chris Hemsworth, Anthony Mackie, Sebastian Stan, Letitia Wright, Paul Rudd, Tenoch Huerta Mejía, Simu Liu, Lewis Pullman, Danny Ramirez, David Harbour, Winston Duke, Hannah John-Kamen, Tom Hiddleston and Florence Pugh.
Many major stars of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, who fans assumed would be in the movie,
were left off the cast list. These names include Benedict Cumberbatch’s Doctor Strange, Brie Larson’s Captain Marvel, Mark Ruffalo’s Hulk, Chris Pratt’s StarLord, Jeremy Renner’s Hawkeye, Tom Holland’s Spiderman and Elizabeth Olsen’s Scarlet Witch. Some fans also thought Ryan Reynolds’ Deadpool and Hugh Jackman’s Wolverine would have roles in “Doomsday” after the success of “Deadpool & Wolverine,” but they weren’t on Wednesday’s list.
It’s possible some of these heroes will show up in the movie unannounced given Marvel traditionally conceals some surprises from its marketing materials. It could also be that Marvel still plans to announce additional casting at a later date. The studio hinted as much with their reply to Downey on social media.
Fans have already taken to social media with theories about the movie’s plot based on who was included and excluded from the
announcement. Of the confirmed heroes from the MCU’s main universe-616, only Thor (Chris Hemsworth) and Shang-Chi (Simu Liu) have significant ties to the more mystical and cosmic parts of the franchise’s world. The potential absences of characters like Doctor Strange (Benedict Cumberbatch) and the Guardians of the Galaxy suggest that the film may focus more on the geopolitical tensions over superpowered resources than on more outlandish space-based and magical parts of the mythology.
The potential absences of major franchise stars like Scarlet Witch (Elizabeth Olsen) and Bruce Banner (Mark Ruffalo) from Doomsday make it seem likely that “Avengers: Secret Wars” will attempt to achieve a similar effect of escalation as “Avengers: Endgame” had, when characters like Captain Marvel (Brie Larson) and Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) returned after not appearing in Infinity War to make the ensemble and scale of the later film even larger than that of the earlier one.
“Avengers: Doomsday” is set to hit theaters May 1, 2026.
Mikey Madison hosts
“Saturday
Night Live”
Morgan Wallen returns as musical guest
ALYSSA TILLMAN
ALYSSA.TILLMAN.22@CNU.EDU
“Saturday Night Live” returned to the air for the latest episode in its 50th season on Saturday, Mar. 29, with “Anora” star Mikey Madison serving as host and country star Morgan Wallen as musical guest. This was Madison’s first time hosting SNL and Wallen’s second appearance on the show.
In the cold open, Mikey Madison joins Ego Nwodim and Sarah Sherman as high school girls gossiping in a Signal group chat. Suddenly, Jennabell and her friends are joined by Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth (Andrew Dismukes). He continues their chatty cadence, sharing and speaking in emojis as he shares national secrets. He invites Vice President JD Vance (Bowen Yang), who continues the inappropriate conversation via Greenland.
Mikey Madison notes in her monologue that she has a relaxed vibe in real life. Yet, in the movies, she’s been set on fire twice and experienced several violent ends. She talks about her background as a “horse girl,” which is a nerd but with long hair, showing a cute picture from Halloween growing up. There’s also a moment where she asks the audience to guess who in a lineup is her twin brother: “If you guessed the one who looks like Ron Weasley on testosterone, you win.”
The first few sketches included a sequel to a sketch from November where a commercial acting teacher (Marcello Hernández) gives some unconventional acting tips to students in his class and a sketch where people go through the realities of standing in line for popular food that Joe Jonas makes a cameo in.
A no-nonsense judge ( Nwodim) cautions prospective jurors that work will not be an excuse for getting out of serving. She meets a number of kooky participants, including Emil Wakim as Luigi Mangione and Chloe Fineman’s pedestrian Parker Posey in “White Lotus”. Hernández scream sings while wearing a shiny blue jumpsuit as Benson Boone. During college spring break, a couple (Fineman and Hernández) have a meaningful heart-to-heart about marriage and growing up while
antics including vomiting and other goofy altercations happen in the background. Morgan Wallen then performs “I’m the Problem”. In January, this was released as the fourth single from Wallen’s fourth studio album of the same title.
On Weekend Update, Devon Walker comes out to describe his intense TikTok-influenced 3 a.m. wake-up regime. A brief “Hear Me Out” segment is next, where Jost tackles Paddington: “Hear me out, Paddington’s a toxic bitch. He’s an illegal immigrant freeloading off a nice, gullible white family.” Joann of Joanne Fabrics (Ashley Padilla) comes out to comment on the chain’s various bona fides. Jost mentions Michael’s, which triggers Joann. “Know what ruined us? Feminism,” she says, sniffing glue.
In the next sketch, Dismukes is a Godfather-type gangster, full of regrets. He’s out with his two sons (James Austin Johnson and Hernández) , when he gets lit up in a sea of bullets. Lying there dying, he laments he will not see his grandkids grow up. Another regret? He never got to try stand-up comedy. Morgan Wallen then performs “Just in Case”. The recently released single is a heartfelt song about clinging to the hope of rekindling a past relationship that didn’t work out.
Midwife Barry ( Yang) returns with a new haircut. Barry is bitter Mikey Madison’s OB-GYN does not remember her; they met during a Hilary Duff concert at the Today show in 2007. The next sketch is a Please Don’t Destroy short, where the guys are excited to meet Mikey, who they hear is very down to earth and open to brainstorming ideas.She walks in dressed as Squidward from “Spongebob Squarepants”. She confesses she wants a serious liveaction, serious rendition of Spongebob. They are reluctant but flash forward three years, and she gets her wish.
Mikey Madison brings out people she is currently dating in the next sketch. Jeremy Hinge (Michael Longfellow) walks out to discover he’s the only contestant. Under bright lights, he doesn’t want to define their relationship. An animated short video follows, where it’s 1620 and two explorers ( Yang and Longfellow) are planning the development of Manhattan.
CNU Tonight’s 100th Show:
It’s kind of a big dill
CLAIRE HALL CLAIRE.HALL.22@CNU.EDU
CNU Tonight, an organization on campus known for doing comedy sketches on campus, celebrated their 100th show this past Saturday, March 29. The show’s duration was about two hours, starting at 8 p.m. and running till 10 p.m. Attendees received a Play Bill at the door that gave an overview of all the club members as well as a list of the sketches for the night. Walking into the entrance of the Gaines Theater, you could see the massive turnout from the Christopher Newport University community, with many coming together to watch their friends and the seniors perform.
The night started with the President of the organization, Andrew Emerson, explaining the schedule for the evening to the audience. The opening of the show was a 20 minute video created by one of their Alumni, Joel Mabalot, who graduated from CNU in 2019. After that, we were treated to multiple actors showcasing their many talents in the first sketch, some of which included fencing and balancing a spinning disk on a stick. Both Act I and Act II had a lot of funny sketches in them, and some of my favorites included “The Manly Maids Internship Program” and “Hell’s Worst Nightmare.” You can tell that every member in the organization worked very hard to make this show a success, as the skits were very creative and humorous. Towards the end of the show, the seniors did their own skit, which was a massive hit. You can tell that they have put a serious amount of dedication into the organization from when they first started.
One of the many individuals in the organization is senior Patrick Wood, who expressed that he loves CNU Tonight because “it’s full of silly, wonderful people who are just here to have a good time. Telling jokes and putting on the show is great, but the people are what make this club so wonderful,” he said.
CNU Tonight has become a second home for many, providing laughter and friendships that are life changing. Senior Ben Upbin shared that he’s been a part of CNU Tonight since his freshman year, and that they’ve truly become family to him. “I feel so
honored that the things I’ve said and written have made [people] laugh … this club means so much to my heart and I’m so glad I got to be a part of it for four years,” he said.
Sophomore Mary Woodfolk explained how the organization prides itself on diversity and welcomes anyone and everyone. “I enjoy how everyone can be themselves without any judgement, and I love how diverse the club is when it comes to humor,” she said.
Junior Garrett Goldberger loves the organization for the same reason. “I love CNU Tonight because every person has a story to tell, but we all come together with one common goal: to make people laugh,” he added. Overall, I think the show was very fun, as the sketches were very creative and funny. I would recommend coming to more of their shows in the future, as this organization shows unwavering dedication to making people on campus laugh. Bonds between their members are unmatched, they come together at the end of the day to perform amazing skits and give the crowd a good laugh.
“It’s full of silly, wonderful people who are just here to have a good time. Telling jokes and putting on the show is great, but the people are what make this club so wonderful.”
LIFESTYLE
Shop local!
Four farmers markets to ring in the spring
KATE MICHAELSON KATE.MICHAELSON.24@CNU.EDU
Spring has finally sprung! Whether you are excited about the warmer weather and are ready to bust out your flip flops, or are fighting for your life due to the inordinate amount of pollen in the air, spring is in full swing. If you are looking to embrace the spring vibes, or just need a break from the paper you’re putting off, try out one of the local farmer’s markets listed below!
1) Hilton Village Market
The Hilton Village farmers market is located just down the road from campus and is open to the public from 9 a.m.-noon on Saturdays. The market features lots of fun vendors including The Flower Farm, where you can purchase fresh spring flowers to
April Fools week recipe: Dirt Cups
From allrecipes.com
Ingredients:
-2 cups cold milk
-1 (4 ounce) package instant chocolate pudding mix
-1 (8 ounce) container frozen whipped topping, thawed
-1 (16 ounce) package chocolate sandwich cookies, crused
Steps:
1) Gather the ingredients
2) Whisk cold milk and pudding mix together in a bowl for 2 minutes. Let stand until it is thick
3) Stir whipped topping and 1/2 of the crushed cookies into pudding
4) Spoon 1 tablespoon crushed cookies into each of eight small glasses; spoon pudding on top, filling 3/4 full
5) Sprinkle remaining crushed cookies over top. Refridgerate for one hour before serving
brighten your space as well as your day! Other items at the Hilton market include coffee, sourdough, cookies, produce and much more.
2)Williamsburg Farmers Market
The Williamsburg Farmers Market is located in Merchant’s Square in Colonial Williamsburg and meets on Saturdays from 8a.m.-noon. The market features produce, flowers and other baked goods. Colonial Williamsburg also has an arts and music festival called Second Sundays on the second Sunday of each month. The next Second Sunday event is on April 13th from 11 a.m.-4 p.m. and will feature 180+ vendors as well as live music.
3) Ghent Farmers Market
The Ghent farmer’s market is located in Norfolk at 730 Spotswood Avenue in the green space of Blair Middle School. The market is set up from 4pm-7pm on the first and third Saturday of the month and sells items such as jewelry, pottery, gluten-free bakery items, farm fresh produce and donuts.
4) Yorktown Farmers Market
The Yorktown Farmers Market is located at Riverwalk Landing in Yorktown and is open on Saturdays from 8 a.m.- noon. The market features flowers, produce and various crafts. A full list of vendors are available on the Yorktown farmers market website.
Don’t miss the opportunity to shop local and try out one of the farmers markets near campus!
Staff Writer Kate Michaelson holding flowers, photo taken by Kate Michaelson/ TheCaptainsLog.
Put yourself first:
The importance of dating yourself
MICHALAH BECK
MICHALAH.BECK.24@CNU.EDU
Relationship hopping has become an issue. If that’s how you cope, then okay. Odds are it is not working out for you, though. Many people do not realize the importance of dating yourself before jumping into a relationship with another person. What are my credentials, you may ask. I lived it. And it worked. Here are ways you can date yourself before dating someone else.
Go on walks to connect with nature
As someone who is not a huge fan of the outdoors, I find peace in taking a nice, long walk. No, just walking from your residence hall to class does not count. Allow yourself time to walk a couple of miles. Keep your AirPods in and listen to your favorite songs, or take the earbuds out and connect with the sounds around you. So much can happen when you take a break and remember you are one of a billion living beings on this planet.
Sit alone in a coffee shop and read your favorite book
No, no one cares that you are by yourself in a coffee shop. I guarantee you no one is paying attention. Find a seat in a coffee shop, get a nice cup of coffee or your preferred cafe beverage, take a deep breath and open the book you swore you would finish last semester. (I’m looking right at you, I know you put that book on your bookshelf and told yourself you’d
finish it when your assignments weren’t drowning you).
Find a new hobby
I’m aware this is so much easier said than done. Be honest with yourself, doom-scrolling on Instagram or TikTok is doing nothing but feeding your mind with thoughts that are not benefiting you in the long run. Pick up a video game controller and discover video games that can exercise your critical thinking skills. Pick up a pen and begin writing until your hand is cramping with your thoughts becoming one with the art of the world. Find a paintbrush and begin to paint whatever comes to your mind. Find a healthy hobby to indulge in for your mind and soul. You never know – You may have developed a new passion.
Buy yourself flowers
Admittedly, I thought this was lame and perhaps “cheesy” until I did it. I went to Trader Joes a while back and bought a bouquet of flowers for $5.99 and it was the best $5.99 I ever spent. The flowers immediately brightened my apartment’s living room and provided a gentle reminder to take care of yourself – As you should a flower.
Most importantly, be kind to yourself
Seriously. This is not meant to be a pep talk to remind yourself that you are beautiful and amazing. Consider this – Would you seriously be as hypercritical of your partner as you are to yourself? Odds are you are not planning on it. Learning to develop patience, care and practicing self-love can make you feel more stable within yourself before you can provide more of yourself and your time to a whole other human being.
These strategies have helped me, and many others I know to be ready to encounter a possible relationship. Remember the saying: You cannot help others if you cannot help yourself first. Take care of yourself, learn yourself and date yourself before being open to dating others.
Your go-to advice column for college
CLAIRE HALL CLAIRE.HALL.22@CNU.EDU
I need a major confidence booster. Any tips?
We have all had moments where we feel absolutely awful about ourselves, and that is a normal feeling to feel as we reach our teen and adult years. With social media on the rise, it is easy to see other people’s lives through a lens and compare yourself to them. I am here to tell you that it is okay to have those moments. However, what matters most is that you come out of the other side feeling more confident. Below, I have listed some tips that can help you in maintaining your confidence and slaying each day with your head held high.
Drop the social media for a day
I know social media is a staple in everyone’s lives. It is where we get our daily news from and information about what others are doing. However, social media can be very harmful for your mindset, as it gives you this idea that your life is not as good enough as other content creators on the platform. I have personally had issues with this, as I would compare my body to others on social media. When something like this starts to happen, it is best to put social media down for the day and try to invest in other things. Unplugging, even if it is only for a day, can make a significant difference in your life.
Do activities that make you feel
good
Once you have removed social media from your daily routine, try and fill up your time with other things that make you feel good. For example, when I am on a social media cleanse, I enjoy making jewelry to keep my hands and mind busy. Other activities that I do include reading, exercising or simply taking a walk outside. Distract your mind by investing in your hobbies, as doing what you love can really help out your mindset. Becoming really good at a certain hobby can really help with raising your confidence.
Wear clothing that makes you feel confident
Another thing that you can do to improve your confidence is to wear clothing that you feel comfortable and confident in. You do not have to follow certain clothing trends in order to be perceived as confident. Find your style and own it. If you feel confident in what you are wearing, you will slay the whole day away. Another reminder, you are not meant to fit in clothes, clothes are meant to fit you. So build your favorite wardrobe with clothes you love, and your confidence will increase significantly.
Smile and stay positive
I get it. College is not all sunshine and rainbows. Being an adult can suck. However, you should try to smile and remain positive when approaching life. It is ok to get emotional and cry about your day. I do it all the time. It is very much a college staple. But, after you have a good cry, turning it around and remaining positive can really give you a confidence booster. Just remember that bad days come and go, and that the grass is greener on the other side. Sometimes, your positivity will rub off on others, creating an environment full of happiness and love.
I hope these tips help boost your confidence. Remember to take everyday in stride and remain confident. Go Captains, and I will see you guys next week.
Photo courtesy of Claire Hall /TheCaptainsLog
Dasies in a field, photo taken by Claire Hall/TheCaptainsLog.
OPINIONS
12
“The Captain’s Log is free to write anything it pleases and CNU fully respects the Freedom of the press.”— CNU Chancellor Paul Trible
Yik Yak vs. CNU: Is YikYak an appropriate site for news updates?
BROOKE MARTIN
BROOKE.MARTIN.21@CNU.EDU
Katherine Zickel /TheCaptainsLog
Every student, professor and staff member here at Christopher Newport University has heard of the iconic social media app, YikYak, at least once in their time here. The platform has gained popular status on campus as an incognito forum to post discourse and opinions about current happenings on CNU grounds. All you have to do to join the secret circle is sign up with a university email address and share your innermost thoughts. However, this site has a harmful dark side to it, as comments expressing misogynist, racist, ableist, or outright scary sentiments are commonly found. Since students believe the app is fully faceless, they can share hateful viewpoints or false defamatory statements without consequence. Is YikYak somewhat helpful to the CNU community? In terms of finding pertinent information fast, CNU students seem to flock towards the media site for updates.
Originally created as a local community based social network by two college students themselves, the app operates on a GPSbased server that connects those in the same five mile radius in a “yak,”or a local grouping. The messages sent by users can be posted anonymously and thus visible to
anyone within that distance. In 2017, the company was forced to take YikYak offline due to problematic content, but has thus been resurrected and rebranded as a “college centered app where anonymous users can create free discussion” according to Yik Yak’s website. Despite how successful the reemergence of the platform is currently among the younger generation, its scandalous reputation still remains.
Our institution has had to address YikYak controversies several times in the past. Last semester on Oct. 4, 2024, Kevin Hughes, Vice President of Student Affairs, sent a campus-wide email concerning prejudiced messages and threats made about fellow students’ race, gender, abilities and other characteristics. In full disclosure, I have never owned the app nor do I ever intend to, as I do not need a space full of negativity in my daily life (or adding to my screentime numbers). However, I have witnessed some of the highly “upvoted” posts from my friends’ phones and I can attest how heinous some comments can be. There have been instances where full student names have been dropped for negative gossiping purposes or a group of distinct
people have been verbally attacked. Complaints or criticism often spike when a significant campus event is held, such as a PLP speaker, a fraternity party, or a club event (the speaker event comments are so disrespectful y’all). Whenever a dorm fire alarm sets off, you know a bunch of grumbling will occur in the online community.
As a whole, the campus should probably not be engaging in the snooping social network, as it is simply unhealthy to engage in hatred directed at your fellow peers. Cyberbullying is on the rise amongst universities and YikYak enables the act of harassment in its forum of “free expression.” The site is designed to prompt salacious opinions under the guise of anonymity (which isn’t wholly true as law enforcement and the corporation can track down your IP address). As CNU students specifically, we pride ourselves on our school community built on helpfulness, cordiality and accountability. We have an important reputation of being leaders with integrity… so continuing to perpetuate malicious lies on our online space is quite contradictory. CNU cannot force you to delete the app, as that would likely fall under infringement of free speech and personal property, therefore, the platform remains at large.
However, the Captains community could utilize the hyperconnected social media network for useful purposes. Despite the rampant bigoted messages and waves of very unusual random thoughts, students mainly view YikYak as a reputable source for information. Multiple students in need of roommates for the housing process have found their new living mates on the site. Individuals have given academic advice and guided others to find the help they need. A dutiful CNU student updates the student body on the weather everyday (shoutout to weather girl!) and another posts their original
poetry. Clubs have even turned to marketing their upcoming events on the local yak page.
When there is a campus emergency or a mysterious incident occurring in the vicinity, YikYak is the first on the scene. Students spread first person accounts like a news interview, leading others to be updated and informed on what is happening in real time. Once at 3 a.m., the entire street of Warwick Boulevard experienced a power outage, and within seconds, students were reporting from different dorms to let others know it’s not them alone experiencing it. Hear a bump in the night? It is likely that a close peer will hear it too and attempt to get to the bottom of the enigma. If God forbid there ever were a terrible crisis where the campus would have to lockdown or evacuate for safety, I firmly believe that YikYak would be the first to catch on and notify students before an official police message could be drafted. My personal consensus: Since we cannot ban the social platform entirely, our campus should try and produce the best content possible. Funny memes, investigative journalism and artistic pursuits should fill the feed instead of hate. I’d like to see more hilarious inside jokes on Yik Yak that only CNU students would understand. Or perhaps post more photos of your dog back at home! Let’s use the app for its beneficial purposes and bring the community together.
Yik Yak app icon, photo by
Hit and miss:
Why I dislike spray sunscreen
CLAIRE HALL CLAIRE.HALL.22@CNU.EDU
The weather is getting warmer and the UV index is slowly starting to rise. However, I never thought in a million years that the temperatures would spike to 80 degrees towards the end of March, especially in Virginia. Due to the warm temperatures, I decided to do what everyone else and their mother was doing: go to the beach. With such a relaxing day ahead, what could go wrong? Spoiler alert: a crippling sunburn. You may be asking yourself, Claire, why didn’t you use sunscreen? I, in fact, did use sunscreen. However, it was spray sunscreen. Now, our parents are always telling us to use sunscreen, and for good reason too. Who wants to be feeling like they are burning alive? The day before my trip, I went to Target to get some sunscreen, and chose a cheaper option: Neutrogena Spray Sunscreen. When we went to the beach, I sprayed that stuff EVERYWHERE. We are talking layers and layers. Half the bottle was gone. Afterwards, I did what everyone else would do: take a dip in the water and then tan on the sand. Well, those four hours of being on the oceanfront didn’t do me any favors. At first, when we packed up our stuff, I was feeling great. I felt like a supermodel, all tan and sunkissed. I didn’t expect what happened next.
Who am I kidding, I did see this coming. After all, we were at the beach for hours and hours on end. When my friends and I walked on the boardwalk, we got a bunch of stares. It wasn’t until I looked down that I saw that I was covered in a massive sunburn. I looked like a tourist that’s never been anywhere near the beach before. Throughout the day, it got worse and worse. Everything started to hurt and my tan lines were so bad that I just wanted to hide.
It’s safe to say that spray sunscreen is not your best friend when it comes to going to the beach. I am 99% certain that the sunscreen never hit my skin and instead blew away in the wind. Now, you can claim that was a user error. Either way, do not trust spray sunscreen. It doesn’t work in my opinion and you’ll have to be reapplying consistently. Not to mention, the wind is a deciding factor in how bad your sunburn will
be. Please just stick to the good ol’ Banana Boat sunscreen with that awful white cast, because at the end of the day, you’ll be walking freely without being in debilitating pain. One of my friends ended up using an expired sunscreen from Banana Boat and didn’t even get burned that bad at all. That goes to show you that lotion sunscreen is your best option here. If you still don’t believe me, I’ll be happy to show you my awful sunburn. With that being said, stay safe in that dang UV index.
“It’s safe to say that spray sunscreen is not your best friend when it comes to going to the beach.”
The chaos of casual
I shouldn’t see your stomach at an interview
NIA DAVIS NIA.DAVIS.24@CNU.EDU
If I see one more person in a skin-tight Skims dress when the dress code is “business casual,” I will scream. Common sense isn’t so common, I suppose. Following a dress code that’s been set is not hard when you understand the rules. So here is a very quick rundown on what to wear depending on the dress code.
The most laidback dress code is casual. You can wear jeans, t-shirts and sneakers. It is relaxed and comfortable. Next, a step up from this is business casual. This is when you switch the jeans for khakis or dress pants. Trade t-shirts for blouses or polos. I’ll allow you to sneak a sneaker in there or a pair of Mary Janes. Now things get a bit more serious. Business professional is when you bring out your nice blazer. A blazer is a must, and yes you can pair it with a dress. You can only wear neutral colors such as black, white, navy and tan. Suits should be worn or modest dresses. Also, we don’t need to see your feet
so put those away. Closed toed shoes only.
I could keep going and describe black tie, white ties, semi formal, or cocktail, but we would be here all day. Basically, what you need to understand is that dress codes are important. People notice when you are not following them, and it’s sort of embarrassing. If you’re not sure on what to wear for a certain dress code if it’s not explicitly mentioned, ask a friend, coworker or look it up on Google! We live in a world where we can utilize the internet to ask any questions we may have and this is one of them. We live in a very judgemental world already so can you just follow the rules this one time? Please? Stand out in a positive way, not a negative one!
Businessman wearing a suit, photo from unsplash
Sunscreen, photo from unsplash
Student poetry and short story submissions
Email clog@cnu.edu to be featured in the paper
“Emotions”
By: L.B.
My emotions are on a pendulumSwinging between numbness And the extreme. I am either numb- feeling nothing Or manic, instead of happy. Depressed, rather than sad. Consumed by rage instead of being annoyed.
am I supposed to do?
Previously run April 11, 2024
Sudoku
Fill the puzzle so that every row across, every column down and every 9 by 9 box contains the numbers 1 to 9
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THE CAPTAIN’S LOG is the official student newspaper of Christopher Newport University. It is a public forum, which is published on Thursdays throughout the academic year.
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“Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea”
Character who both literally and figuratively lives under a rock
54 Best place to get kimchi
55 Extended leave
56 The Pacific's most famous clarinet player
60 Purely malevolent
61 Easter egg event
62 Prayer ending
63 Put in order
64 UVA students, colloquially
65 Precursor to the harp
66 "____ leches? en esta economía?"
of the fam
No birdies or bogeys
Completely unprincipled
Old Ben to some, Obi Wan to others
Got a 100 on
Take
Narcissist's biggest characteristic
Where a spider or a programmer might find a bug
18 Exclamation of surprise 19 "I'm so disappointed" over text 20 Gradually wear down 23 Roy from Ted Lasso 24 Styx's "Come ____ Away"
25 Disney Princess voiced by Idina Menzel
26 Unit for electrical current 30 ___-ray disc
32 Opposite of fore, on a ship 34 Guaranteed
35 Most unnerving Great Lake? 36 Old timey gear 37 Surprised greeting 38 Kitchen pest
39 Least clear 40 Many millennia
Apple's MP3 player
Ocean unicorns 45 Like a sauna
Clothes 48 Heist targets 49 Busy hospital rooms (abbr.)
52 More uncommon than 53 Really take time to enjoy 54 Things to piece together
56 Silent letters? 57 Status ___
58 Card game notable for its 'reverse' and 'draw four' cards
59 There is no proper solution, to mathematicians