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420 blaze it: An 8th Grader’s First Time Getting High Tbs staff wrote this hey guys whuddup my names tyler and i just wanna say i cannot WAIT for the best holiday on earth next to christmas (i wonder if santa ever smoked the ganj lol) to roll in. anyway, 420 is upon us once again and id just like to share with all of my fellow “advocates of the green” out there my first experience getting high last year, which was waaaaay too late if you ask me. seriously, if any1 offered me a spliff at like, age 6 id light dat shit up faster than my man mr. marley (my idol btw). i just figured id do my job as a reborn ENT and spread the good word of the day i went to heaven (when i first smoked basically lol). also, i need to kill some time on my moms laptop while my new video “how to roll a fatty w/o your hands” uploads to youtube. ok so me and my buddies tommy and david (tommy is the chill one and davids the pussy aha) were tearing it up at the skate park after ditching gym class cuz idgaf if i get expelled, wearing gym clothes is dumb as hell. so me and the guys were skating and all of a sudden this high school kid came up to us wearing a sublime shirt, so he was totally ok. then he was like “hey do you guys smoke?” and then tommy was like “yeah” and i was like “a little bit” (even though i had only tried to smoke a sheet of spiral paper in 6th grade) and david said “no thats lame” and me and tommy were like “stfu david” and we all laughed. so then the high school guy (he must have been at least 20 cuz he had a moustache) asked us if we wanted to buy some pot. at this point a choir of angels said “hallelujah” in my ears…lol jk but i was seriously so stoked to be able to trip out finally. the guy said he would sell us a pound of purple strand kush straight from columbia (which is some bufu part of mexico i think, idk) for 60 bucks. like, he would sell us the WHOLE bag. and he said that we would get higher than cheech and chong on holiday in hampsterdam (the original stoners lol love you guys),
so there was no way i could turn this down. so me and tommy put in 20 bucks each and we told david wed beat the shit out of him if he didn’t pitch in (hed probably be a bitch about it anyway like when me and tommy totally had the chance to bang this one freshman chick but hung out with david instead because he needed support because his dad died or some shit). we went back to tommys house with the weed because his parents dgaf because their divorced and they let him do whatever he wants (i wish my mom and dad would do that too, itd be awesome haha) and we sat in his basement while he got his lighter and rolling paper that he printed from the internet (word of advice to all my potheads reading this: google images “rolling paper” and thank me later). david opened the bag and said something stupid like “this smells like my moms spice rack” and then i was like “my dick smells like your moms rack” and me and tommy laughed so hard. then david, because hes such an idiot, tastes a little bit of it and says “no really it tastes like it too” and so i was like “youre obviously high now you dumbass, you cant just eat mary-j like that, right tommy?” tommy agreed with me and we kicked out david for being an asshole lol. so then tommy lit the blunt and took a monster hit but he didn’t puff out any smoke (i think hes just a vet you know) and then he passed it to me. i breathed in like id be doing this all my life and i starting coughing and shit and it was so awful but i blew out the smoke immediately because thats how the weed starts working. after one hit i was in complete nirvana (good band too RIP kurt) and i was seeing colors all over and i was laughing so hard and i was tripping balls at that point. tommy kept saying he wasnt high. light weight lol. needless to say, after the high was gone after like 5 hours, i went back and bought more of the wonder drug from that high school kid. he always laughs
whenever i buy from him, so hes probably stoned out of his mind too aha. so thats my story and shit i hope you guys like it since my videos done and my bitch mom is telling me to get off the computer. peace guys. legalize don’t criticize. smoke weed everyday. highest regards, tyler “cloud 9”
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