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NATURAL REMEDIES that actually work

GROW THAT MO Show your support for men's health











£29.04 FOR 0







Bernardo Moya welcomes you to the latest issue of The Best You

18 WE SUPPORT… Anti-bullying Alliance – working towards putting an end to bullying

29 BOOK REVIEWS We review some of our favourites – a small selection of what’s available

62 THE BEST YOU DIRECTORY Find the best coaches, trainers and practitioners here




Posh boy who plays the famous detective – there’s more to Benedict Cumberbatch than meets the eye

26 THE HEALTHY ALTERNATIVE We interview Carol West, founder of Obsidian Retreats, about how she turned her life around


Never mind old wives’ tales. We look at home remedies that really work


Anne Jirsch tells us all we need to know about futurists and how to get the most from your future



Robin Sharma knows how to be productive, and lucky for us, he is sharing this knowledge



With so much of what we read in the papers being negative, The Best You is bringing you some good news


This month is all about moustaches and men’s health. Get ready to wear your mo for the month of Movember

THE BEST YOU No. 25 · November 2014 · Year 3 · EDITOR / PUBLISHER Bernardo Moya · DEPUTY EDITOR Zoë Henry ASSOCIATE EDITOR Bryan Szabo · COPYWRITERS Aaron Wells and Peter Rogers · GRAPHIC DESIGN Carling Ernstzen NEW MEDIA Allan Banford TECHNICAL CONSULTANT Martin Carter · ADVERTISING advertising@thebestyou.co The Best You Corporation LTD 5 Percy St. · London, United Kingdom, W1T 1DG · Tel: +44 (0)845 230 2033 · www.thebestyoumagazine.co






We talk to the Anti-Bullying Alliance about how we can put an end to bullying

38 THEIR INSPIRATIONAL STORIES Bullying, diabetes or cancer – we chat with some inspirational people about how they got over their challenges

41 TIM'S TV Jim Aitkins is back with his regular column. This month it’s all about perspective

42 WHAT DOES IT TAKE… …to be a journalist? We chat with Lester Kiewit, who is a renowned broadcast journalist


46 BE DIABETES AWARE Libby Dowling from Diabetes UK shares how to decrease your chances of developing Type 2 Diabetes

48 ARE YOU EATING EMOTIONALLY? Dr. Lisa Turner looks at the reasons why we overeat. She finds out that our emotions often override our appetites

50 WHAT’S THE DIET DOWN LOW? Nutritionist Rhiannon Lambert looks at the pros and cons of some of the most popular fad diets



Steve Bolton knows business, and it turns out the way you treat people is kind of important

56 QUINTESSENTIAL WEALTH What is it? And why should you have it? Garrett Gunderson explains why it is so important

60 THE ROCKY ROAD TO SUCCESS The Best You looks at some historical figures who didn’t have success handed to them on a silver platter




Looks like online dating is the way of the future. We discuss whether this means the decline of good old-fashioned romance

68 HOME IMPROVEMENTS Associate Editor Bryan Szabo looks at some great gadgets that will bring your home into the 21st century






or the past 11 years, the month of November has been christened with a new name – Movember. What started out as a humble gathering of 30 moustachioed men has grown into a worldwide phenomenon, and we at The Best You are unashamedly jumping on the bandwagon. Movember is a fantastic cause, one that has grown awareness about men’s health issues all over the world, while giving something very serious a fun and whimsical edge. This month, men can wear their mos as badges of honour. For some reason, whether it’s a question of machismo or whether men are just more embarrassed, “Men are less aware of their symptoms than women, and are more reluctant to seek help.”—this according to Peter Baker, Chief Executive of the Men's Health Forum. Although men’s health is a very broad spectrum, testicular cancer seems to have become the poster malady for the issue. This might seem strange, as it is relatively rare, accounting for only one per cent of cancer in men. However, it is also one of the easiest cancers to detect and has one

of the highest recovery rates, with 96 per cent of men who detect the disease in its early stages making a full recovery. The fact that there is such a promising recovery rate is probably why it has such a high profile in the world of men’s health – there are so many inspirational stories. We feature one such tale in our new “Their inspirational stories” feature, which we started last month. We chat to Ben Bower, a two-time testicular cancer survivor who now works at raising awareness through the Movember organisation. But this month isn’t all about men’s health. Friday, November 14th is World Diabetes Day. With poor diets and obesity continue to be widespread, Type 2 Diabetes is a growing problem all over the world. Libby Dowling from Diabetes UK gives us some tips on how to reduce your chances of developing this dangerous and often-fatal disease. We also look at the bullying epidemic by raising awareness for Anti-Bullying Week. Although bullying is something we associate with schoolyard antics, it is important to remember that it can take place in the adult world too. People are

bullied by their employees, colleagues and even friends and family. Don’t ever be a doormat and be forced into doing something you aren’t comfortable with. We need to stand up to these bullies and make this cruelty a thing of the past. b


Editor-in-Chief Follow me: @Bernardo_Moya

“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.” – Harvey Fierstein

WE WANT YOUR STORIES The Best You is all about inspiring people. If you have a tale to tell that you think will help someone become the best they can be, please tell us.

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is a London-born professional psychic. Her client base includes heads of industry, politicians and celebrities from the world of film, music and sport. She is an internationally best-selling author of Instant Intuition, The Future is Yours, Cosmic Energy and Create Your Perfect Future.



is a Canadian-born freelance editor and writer who specialises in helping authors realise their potential as writers. His prominent appearance on the acknowledgement page of dozens of published works is proving that the voice he is helping budding authors to find is a precious thing indeed.


has dedicated his life to empowering others by the same economic principles that have blessed his life. He achieved business success early in life, but it was only when he studied the actual principles that real entrepreneurs and businessmen use to create wealth that he had his biggest breakthrough successes.


is an American author. He speaks and trains for corporations and organisations on the topics he writes about. He believes personal growth is easier than most people think and should be fun. Visit Jim’s blog, Obstacle Blaster, and leave a comment if you like what you see.




is a clinical advisor at Diabetes UK and previously worked as a diabetes specialist nurse in the NHS. She is responsible for keeping people with diabetes updated with the latest information through the charity’s website, magazine and publications.


is a practitioner of NLP, time line therapy, hypnotism, shamanic healing, and other healing processes. Feel free to contact her if you think she can help. All information will be treated in the strictest confidence.



has built upon a wealth of knowledge having worked as nutritionist at a number of London’s most renowned eateries, health boutiques and NHS Hospitals. Much of her research and practice centres on eating disorders and weight management. She currently works in Harley Street at The Food Doctor.



has been plying his trade as a broadcast journalist for close on a decade. He began in radio, and joined the wild world of television in 2008. He has forged a reputation as a tough, brave reporter, with a welldeveloped visual sense. Born and raised in Cape Town, Lester takes great pleasure in exploring his hometown.



is the founder of Sharma Leadership International Inc., a global consultancy with a single focus: to help organisations develop employees who Lead Without a Title. SLI's clients include many of the best companies on the planet such as Starbucks, Nike and The Coca-Cola Company.



began investing in property in 2002. Having made his first million before he was 30, Steve encountered financial difficulties like many other business owners in 2001. He realised that it was his home that saved him from bankruptcy and was inspired to rebuild his fortune on the solid foundation of buy-to-let property investment.

The Best You is published by The Best You Corporation Ltd, 5 Percy Street, W1T 1DG. Opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect The Best You Corporation Ltd, policy. The Best You Corporation Ltd accepts no responsibility for views expressed by its contributors. Advertisements and reader offers are not endorsed by The Best You or The Best You Corporation Ltd.





Connect with the wonderful, special, and powerful inside. Learn new ways to get your mind and body in balance, bringing out the rich core of your being. Discover the secrets that will enable you to take charge of your inner life and become The Best You.

Life Without Limits


THE NATURAL WAY ever mind old wives’ tales. We look at N home remedies that really work

THE FUTURISTS Anne Jirsch tells us all we need to know about futurists and how to get the most from your future



SIX HOME REMEDIES THAT ACTUALLY WORK From putting butter on burns to headbands that cure headaches, the world is full of home remedies – most of which are total rubbish. That doesn’t mean they’re all snake oil, though. Here are six reliable home remedies for common maladies.


When we are stressed, we tend to clench our jaws, which can lead to a tension headache – never a pleasant experience. To stop a tension headache in its tracks, take a pencil and place it horizontally between your teeth. Don’t bite down – just leave the pencil there with enough resistance to keep it in your mouth. This forces your jaw to relax, stopping the tension headache before it even starts. It’s cheaper and healthier than taking pain killers, which can cause a massive number of health problems if abused.


Suffering from bad breath or halitosis is both unpleasant and embarrassing. But not to worry – there is an easy and healthy solution to your problem. Yoghurt, particularly of the plain or natural variety, contains numerous good bacteria. And since bad bacteria are the cause of bad smells, it stands to reason that the good bacteria in yoghurt cancel out the bad bacteria that are causing your bad breath. Unsweetened yoghurt is also much better for your teeth than gum or boiled sweets, and it’s tasty too.


If you are prone to cold sores, you know that, like family, November and December are the months that cold sores are most likely to drop by for a visit. The cold weather paired with the stress of the upcoming festive season wreaks havoc on your immune system, and these nasty buggers will start to take hold. “Lemon balm tea has antiviral properties that work to tame herpes outbreaks”, says James Duke, PhD and author of The Green Pharmacy. Prepare the tea by brewing two to four tablespoons of the herb per cup of boiling water. Let it cool, then dot with a cotton ball on the cold sore several times a day.





Those of us who suffer from eczema know that it’s no joke. It is incredibly uncomfortable, and it can get in the way of even the simplest dayto-day tasks, like wearing jeans if you have it on your legs, or using your phone if it affects your hands. The good news is that there is an easy and inexpensive treatment. “Soothe flare-ups by applying olive oil directly to the irritated area”, says Christopher Dannaker, MD, assistant professor of dermatology at the University of California San Francisco. Packed with antioxidants, it can reduce the inflammation. It is the basis for many storebought moisturisers, but when used alone, it helps you avoid the chemical irritants common in storebought moisturisers.


Living a fast-paced city life means that many of us don’t have time for motion sickness. How can you pull over the car or get out of a train if the motion is making you nauseous when you are on your way to an important meeting? Not only are olives tasty and add a bit of flavour and texture to your Greek salad, they also have compounds that dry your mouth of the excess saliva caused by motion sickness, which will make you feel instantly better. The only downside is you might get some strange looks for carrying a jar of olives around in your handbag or briefcase.


We’ve said a lot against sugar in previous issues of The Best You, but it seems that it does have some good qualities as well. We all know how annoying it is when you get a bad case of the hiccups that just won’t go away no matter how many counts you hold your breath for or how many glasses of water you drink. Sugar is believed to modify the nerve muscles that would otherwise tell the muscles in the diaphragm to contract spasmodically and contribute to hiccups. So, to paraphrase Mary Poppins, “Just a spoon full of sugar makes the hiccups disappear.”



THE FUTURISTS If you could take a peek into the future, would you? Imagine having a time machine that would allow you to glimpse the next big thing in your field or to gain insight into where you will be in five years time. Anne Jirsch tells us some more about futurists.


t may sound fantastical, but today’s business leaders are increasingly consulting futurists – business professionals who predict the future based on charts, trends and logic. I have a better way. To be fair, the futurists are pretty accurate but they can take a long time to come up with the goods and are, therefore, very expensive. I can show you how to get the same or better results far sooner and have the added bonus of seeing how it will benefit you. I work with Future Life Progression. You’ve probably heard of Regression, and this is the flip side – we move forward to see the future. I accidentally stumbled upon this method while I was working with a couple of soldiers. We were attempting to see a past event, but

instead, all three of us saw an event that was still to happen. Each of us described seeing two skyscrapers with smoke billowing out and people on the ground, running. We saw a link to the Middle East and oil. At the time we thought we’d had a bad session or perhaps just overly vivid imaginations, but three weeks later, on 11 September, we watched the attack on the Twin Towers unfold, knowing this was the exact image we’d witnessed. From that moment, we began experimenting to see if we could predict more world events. Within a fortnight, Dave had predicted that America would invade Iraq looking for weapons of mass destruction and that there would be a black American President. The results were consistently accurate.


I began experimenting with my willing clients by taking them a few years into the future; again, the results were amazing. They would see where they would be living, who was in their lives and how their work was progressing. My phone became red hot with clients telling me how they’d found the house, job or business opportunity they’d seen. We looked at our own futures and glimpsed properties that we later found and people that we eventually met. Clients were meeting their ideal partners, getting businesses off the ground, resolving issues with their health or finances. We knew we were on to something. I wrote a book on the subject, The Future is Yours, which became an international best seller. Soon, people from all over the world


were asking for sessions, I knew I couldn’t be everywhere, so I set up Future Life Training. About this time Paul McKenna took an interest in our work and gave us guidance that helped us tighten up our procedures and techniques. Things were moving fast. Business leaders began to check me out. They tend to be more open minded and willing to try out anything that will give them the edge over the competition. Some secretly saw me for sessions; others invited me into their boardrooms to get their staff visioning the future success of the company. Today more than ever we need to be constantly re-evaluating ourselves and where we are heading. We cannot stay where we are because we will slide backwards. The days of coasting

are long over. All of us need to know which direction we should go. We’ve all wasted time, money and energy wandering down the wrong path, but when we look at the super successful, they know exactly where they are going and how they are going to get there. The world is changing rapidly, new trends appear, and things become obsolete or overcrowded. Never before have we needed to anticipate the future as much as we do right now. Right now you may be thinking, ‘What tosh’, but imagine if I am right and you can anticipate the future? Imagine knowing the right time to make a move, what to train in and what areas to develop. Imagine seeing yourself in ten years time and seeing where you are most successful or even looking ahead to your own future genius idea.


Among my clients I have writers and songwriters, movie directors and inventors all using FLP to ‘see’ their own future successes and start working on them right now. I have many business leaders who call me their secret weapon. I would love you to take a peek and see what you come up with. On my website, www. futurelifeprogression.com, I have a number of free downloads. You can look at London in ten years time or maybe the best possible future for the world. While you are there, focus on what you are doing at that time and how it is going. You never know, you might just gain a little insight into your own future success story. b If you would like to contact Anne for a session, please visit her website: www.annejirsch.com








Laughter, humour, travel, love - these add the sparkle that make life worth living. Climb a mountain, give to others, start a family, embrace life. What are the things you wish you had done but haven’t yet? Life is no rehearsal – find ways to enjoy it, whenever you can!

Life Without Limits



Robin Sharma knows how to be productive, and lucky for us, he is sharing this knowledge


With so much of what we read in the papers being negative, The Best You is bringing you some good news


This month is all about moustaches and men’s health. Get ready to wear your mo for the month of Movember




Robin Sharma knows a thing or two about being productive. He wants to help you create explosive productivity so you get big things done. Here are his 21 top tips to increase your productivity dramatically.


1. CHECK EMAIL IN THE AFTERNOON. This way you protect the peak energy hours of your mornings for your best work.

2. THE TIME IS NOW Stop waiting for perfect conditions to launch a great project. Immediate action fuels a positive feedback loop that drives even more action.

3. SET GOALS Remember that big, brave goals release energy. So set them clearly and then revisit them every morning for 5 minutes.

4. KEEP IT CLEAN Mess creates stress (I learned this from tennis icon Andre Agassi who said he wouldn’t let anyone touch his tennis bag because if it got disorganised, he’d get distracted). So clean out the clutter in your office to get more done.

5. SELL YOUR TV You’re just watching other people get successful in lieu of doing the things that will get you to your dreams .

6. STAY POSITIVE Say goodbye to the energy vampires in your life (the negative souls who steal your enthusiasm).

7. RUN ROUTINES When I studied the creative lives of massively productive people like Stephen King, John Grisham and Thomas Edison, I discovered they follow strict daily routines. (i.e. when they would get up, when they would start work, when they would exercise and when they would relax). Peak productivity’s not about luck. It’s about devotion.

8. GET UP AT 5:00AM Win the battle of the bed. Put mind over mattress. This habit alone will strengthen your willpower so it serves you more dutifully in the key areas of your life.

9. DON’T DO SO MANY MEETINGS I’ve trained the employees of our Fortune 500 clients on exactly how to do this – including having the few

meetings they now do standing up – and it’s created breakthrough results for them.

10. DON’T SAY YES TO EVERY REQUEST Most of us have a deep need to be liked. That translates into us saying yes to everything – which is the end of your elite productivity.

11. FOCUS ON YOUR TALENTS Outsource everything you can’t be BIW (Best in the World) at. Focus only on activities within what I call “Your Picasso Zone”.

12. STOP MULTI-TASKING New research confirms that all the distractions invading our lives are rewiring the way our brains work (and dropping our IQs by as much as five points!). Be one of the rare-air, mentally and physically disciplined few who can focus mono-maniacally on one thing for hours on end. It’s all about practice .

13. GET FIT LIKE MADONNA Getting to your absolute best physical condition will create explosive energy, renew your focus and multiply your creativity.

14. WORKOUT TWICE A DAY This is just one of the little-known productivity tactics that I’ll walk you through in my new online training program, Your Productivity Unleashed, but here’s the key: exercise is one of the greatest productivity tools in the world. So do 20 minutes first thing in the morning and then another workout around 7:00pm to set you up for wow in the evening.


sets to-do lists. But those who play at the world-class level also record what they commit to stop doing. Steve Jobs said that what made Apple Apple was not so much what they chose to build but all the projects they chose to ignore.

18. USE YOUR COMMUTE TIME If you’re commuting 30 minutes each way every day, get this: at the end of a year, you’ve spent 6 weeks of 8-hour days in your car. I encourage you to use that time to listen to fantastic audiobooks, excellent podcasts, or valuable learning programs. Remember, the fastest way to double your income is to triple your rate of learning.

19. BE A CONTRARIAN Why buy your groceries at the time the store is busiest? Why go to movies on the most popular nights? Why hit the gym when the gym’s completely full? Do things at off-peak hours and you’ll save a great deal of time and energy.

20. GET THINGS RIGHT THE FIRST TIME Most people are wildly distracted these days, which leads to mistakes. To unleash your productivity, become one of the special performers who have the mind-set of doing what it takes to get it flawless first. This saves you days of having to fix problems.

21. GET LOST. Don’t be so available to everyone. I often spend hours at a time in the cafeteria of a university close to our headquarters. I turn off my devices and think, create, plan and write. Zero interruptions. Pure focus. Massive results. b

15. DRINK MORE WATER When you’re dehydrated, you’ll have far less energy, so you get less done.

16. BLOCK YOUR TIME Work in 90-minute blocks with 10-minute intervals to recover and refuel. This is another game-changing move I personally use to do my best work.

17. WRITE A STOP-DOING LIST Every productive person obsessively


WE SUPPORT Anti-bullying Alliance The Anti-bullying Alliance is a coalition of organisations and individuals working together to stop bullying and create safe environments in which children and young people can live, grow, play and learn. We welcome membership from any organisation or individual that supports this vision. ABA also supports a growing network of almost 1,000 schools and colleges across the country. The ABA coordinates Anti-Bullying Week each November and is the national voice for evidence-based practice in relation to the prevention of bullying between children and young people. ABA defines bullying as the repetitive, intentional hurting of one person or group by another person or group, where the relationship involves an imbalance of power. Bullying can be physical, verbal or psychological. It can happen faceto-face or through cyberspace. We can provide expertise in relation to all forms of bullying between children and young people. We have experience in working with a vast range of clients including the government, youth charities, journalists, documentary makers, public services, schools and colleges, children’s homes, young offender institutes and businesses. If an expert member of our team is unable to assist, we can certainly

put you in touch with someone who can. Every year the Anti-Bullying Alliance coordinate national Anti-Bullying Week – a week during which children and young people, schools, parents and carers come together with one aim: to stop bullying for all. This year we are calling on the school community to take action to stop the bullying of ALL children and young people – including disabled children and those with special educational needs, who are significantly more likely to experience bullying in schools and the wider community. Please support the AntiBullying Alliance during Anti-Bullying Week 2014 by fundraising for us or by making a donation. Every penny helps us to work with our members to stop bullying between children and young people and create safe environments where children can live, grow, play and learn. The Anti-Bullying Alliance was established by the NSPCC and NCB in 2002 and is hosted by leading children’s charity, the National Children’s Bureau. b

If you are interested in getting involved or making a donation, please visit www.anti-bullyingalliance. org.uk for more information.


Katie Piper Foundation

Children Of The Night




SMA Trust

War Child

The Children’s Trust








The news we read in the newspapers and see on the television is so negative that it can often feel like the media is conspiring to get you down in the dumps. That’s why The Best You is bringing you snippets of good news.

From the mouths of babes


he youngest person to be honoured with a Nobel Prize, Malala, 17, was a schoolgirl who began promoting education for all in Pakistan when she was 11. Two years ago, she was shot in the head by a Taliban gunman, which gained her and her cause attention worldwide. ”Despite her youth, Malala Yousafzay has already fought for several years for the right of girls to education, and has shown by example that children and young people, too, can contribute to improving their own situations. This she has done under the most

dangerous circumstances. Through her heroic struggle she has become a leading spokesperson for girls’ rights to education.” Kailash Satyarthi, another champion of children’s rights, was also named the winner of the 2014 Nobel Peace Prize. Giving up a career as an electrical engineer in 1980, Satyarthi, 60, has led a global movement “in the Gandhi’s tradition” to reform “the grave exploitation of children” who are forced into labour. Showing great personal courage as a grassroots activist, he has freed tens of thousands of child slaves, reports the Associated Press.



3 years ago Doug Melton’s infant son Sam was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes (a condition that affects an estimated 3 million Americans every year, costing the country $15 billion annualy). Since that moment, the co-scientific director of the Harvard Stem Cell Institute has dedicated

his career to finding a cure for the disease. Today he announced that he and his colleagues have taken a giant leap forward, producing for the first time massive quantities of human insulin-producing beta cells. “We are now just one pre-clinical step away from the finish line”, said Melton, whose

daughter Emma also has type 1 diabetes. “You never know for sure that something like this is going to work until you’ve tested it numerous ways. We’ve given these cells three separate challenges with glucose in mice.” The results were clear and fast. Melton told NPR news: “We can cure their diabetes right away — in less than 10 days.”


China has long gotten a bad reputation for its disregard for the environment, but it seems as though they are changing their ways. According to the country’s premier, Li Keqiang, China cut its carbon emissions by five per cent in the first half of 2014 – the largest drop in years.

All stories adapted from the Good News Network.






Since 2003, the ‘N’ in November has been replaced with an ‘M’. Men the world over hide their upper lips with facial hair in a bid to raise awareness about men’s health. This year, The Best You is encouraging you to join the trend.


he Movember Foundation is the leading global organisation committed to changing the face of men’s health. We achieve this by challenging men to grow moustaches during Movember (the month formerly known as November) to spark conversation and raise funds for prostate cancer, testicular cancer and mental health problems. Since Movember’s humble beginnings in 2003 in Melbourne, Australia, when 30 men grew moustaches, Movember has become a truly global movement, inspiring more than four million men and women to participate across 21 countries. The Movember community has raised over £345 million and has funded more than 800 programmes to date. This work is saving and improving the lives of men affected by prostate cancer, testicular cancer and mental health problems. Men start November 1st cleanshaven and grow their moustaches for 30 days, getting friends, family

and colleagues to donate to their moustache-growing efforts. Men with their new moustaches (also known as Mo Bros) become walking, talking billboards. Similar to a charity run or walk, Mo Bros use their hairy ribbon to spark conversations around the oftenignored issue of men’s health and seek to raise funds to support the work of the Movember Foundation. Movember is not just for men. Women who support men’s health, known as Mo Sistas, are an important part of Movember’s success. They get involved in the same way as men, except they don’t need to grow a moustache. They sign up at Movember. com, start a team, and recruit the men in their lives to participate, donate, fundraise, plan and participate in events. Most importantly, they rally the men they know to join the movement, grow moustaches and have important conversations about men’s health. “Our vision is to have an everlasting impact on men’s health”, said Sarah Coghlan, UK Director for Movember.

“The Movember moustache puts a fun twist on this serious issue. We encourage Mo Bros and Mo Sistas to sign up at Movember.com, grow and support awesome moustaches, and raise crucial awareness and funds to address the most pressing issues in prostate cancer, testicular cancer and men’s mental health. We look forward to seeing our communities having open conversations with friends, family and colleagues about their health in 2014, and making it the hairiest Movember yet!” Meaningful strides have been taken toward achieving our goals, but there is more work to be done. Each of the causes we support remains in desperate need of further funding, and the issue continues to be one that men are often uncomfortable discussing. We’re committed to raising vital funds and awareness to improve the lives of men and their families. Sign up at movember.com to join the movement and have an lasting impact on the face of men’s health.




Though Benedict Cumberbath’s meteoric rise to fame is a familiar story in the world of here-todaygone-tomorrow stars of the screen, few have achieved his level of superstardom whilst remaining so down to earth. 22 | WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO






enedict Cumberbatch’s star is on the rise. If his trajectory continues, he is likely to shoot through the ceiling of the universe into the bright unknown. He is the toast of Hollywood, a critical darling as well as a massive blockbuster box-office draw, and he has become one of the more unlikely sex symbols of our time. He is the thinking woman’s crumpet – a man that journalist Caitlin Moran describes as “lavishly, wonkily beautiful, 900 foot tall (with) a voice like a jaguar hiding in a cello.” He’s also BFFs with Ellen. His public presence has gone from bubbling-under to saturation point very, very quickly. He is a respected theatre actor, but he has also done TV (Sherlock), massive Hollywood blockbusters (Star Trek) and indie gems (Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy). “I want to be known as an actor”, he says. “Not as a film star, or theatre actor, or television actor, or Sherlock, or for just one role. I want to be known as an actor, and do a bit of everything.” The dazzle of Tinseltown is a world removed from Cumberbatch’s early days as the scion of a rather distinguished family. His father was an actor by the truly magnificent name Timothy Carlton Congdon Cumberbatch. His great-grandfather, Henry Arnold Cumberbatch CMG, was the consul general of Queen Victoria in Turkey and his grandfather, Henry Carlton Cumberbatch, was a decorated submarine officer of both World Wars and a prominent figure of London high society.

Cumberbatch attended boarding schools from the age of eight, including the prestigious Harrow School, where his drama teacher called him "the best schoolboy actor" he had ever worked with. He then attended the University of Manchester, where he studied Drama, before continuing his training as an actor at the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Art. Bearing all of this in mind, it would be tempting to believe that he had an inordinately privileged upbringing. However, he wasn’t exactly born with a silver spoon in his mouth. “I have always been very grateful for the opportunities I have, because I wasn’t born into them”, he says. “My mum and dad worked really hard to afford them. Mum made commercial choices – and dad as well – to keep me in school uniforms and keep the fees paid. I was like a walking mortgage! I was a very expensive child because of the

way they tried to educate me. That was completely off their own bat. Dad had a pretty nasty experience at public school and was ready to pull me out at any moment if I didn’t enjoy myself. I didn’t have a great time – I had a mixed time. I really enjoyed some aspects, but I was far happier at the first school I went to. So I was of that world, but not because I was born into it. Not that that gives me any right to talk about how the other half lives, or any other half – but it means, I guess, that I have a perspective on it. I’m not just what the label makes me look like, having been to a public school.” His upbringing and relatively sedate early career path ill-prepared him for the rocket-ride into fame that his role as BBC’s Sherlock secured for him. His performance as the brilliant, albeit socially awkward detective propelled him into cult status. Subsequent roles in film such as Atonement, War Horse and, of course, Star Trek: Into Darkness saw


COVER STORY THE BEST YOU him take the leap into the higher echelons of fame. His latest film The Imitation Game sees him tackling the story of Alan Turing, a brilliant Cambridge mathematician, cryptanalyst and computer scientist who was enlisted by his country during World War II to break the Nazi Enigma code. Directed by Morten Tyldum, it spans the key periods of Turing’s life: his unhappy teenage years at boarding school; the triumph of his secret wartime work on the revolutionary electro-mechanical bomb that was capable of breaking 3,000 Enigma-generated naval codes a day; and the tragedy of his post-war decline following his conviction for gross indecency, a now-out-dated criminal offence stemming from his admission

of maintaining a homosexual relationship. “The script is extraordinary”, Cumberbatch says. “I jumped off from that, wanting to learn more. I was astounded at how much we didn’t know about him. Too few people know about him in comparison to the impact and importance he has had on our lives. Historians and activists know about him, but it’s extraordinary that the general public has very little idea about who this person was. He helped save approximately 14 million lives by bringing World War II to a close two years earlier than it would’ve been without his efforts, and he is the father of the computer. He invented the whole concept. So yeah, he is a very important person.” The role has already generated Oscar buzz, something Cumberbatch

Of course there is a part of me that is a bit of a do-gooder – keeping the moral slate clean. But it is really enjoyable and I get a kick from it. It is not a sense of duty, it actually makes me feel good to do things for other people, where it can make a difference to talk to people who wouldn’t normally have access to you 24 | WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO

remains refreshingly ambivalent about. “It would be amazing, but to be honest, it’s so premature”, he says. “It would be almost futile to talk about it. It always happens at festivals at the beginning of the year when I’ve just had my suit back from the dry cleaners after the previous Oscars. The most important thing is that any kind of buzz creates an interest in the film, which hopefully means that more people will see it. That means that Alan Turing’s story will get to a broader audience. That is all I am concerned about as a storyteller, you know, and if I’ve done a good job as him as well, that’s great.” While the film is not quite on the scale of, say, Star Trek, there is little chance of it dimming the brightness of his star. It doesn’t seem like much will – a fact that he is not entirely comfortable with. “I still haven’t adjusted”, he says. “It’s a constant process of negotiation and understanding. It’s very odd, but fun, and I think I’m all right with it. Fame has a learning curve. It is a constant thing.” One of the ways Cumberbatch deals with fame is by using it for good causes. He is an ambassador of The Price’s Trust and a patron of organisations supporting arts amongst disadvantaged young people such as Odd Arts, Anno’s Africa and Dramatic Need. Since portraying Stephen Hawking in the 2004 TV film Hawking, he has been an ambassador for the Motor Neurone Disease Association. He has also campaigned against cancer, war, misogyny, homophobia and the muzzling of the free press. “I know how lucky I am to be paid to be in a position to have a voice, to do my work, and also just the fact that it’s really good fun”, he says. “You owe society a little bit for that – your fans for giving you a good life, but also yourself, just to pay back. I feel very strongly about the little work I do when I have the time. I try to be principled. Of course there is a part of me that is a bit of a do-gooder – keeping the moral slate clean. But it is really enjoyable and

THE BEST YOU I get a kick from it. It is not a sense of duty, it actually makes me feel good to do things for other people, where it can make a difference to talk to people who wouldn’t normally have access to you, the kind of world you live in or the work you do.” His relationship with fame is challenging. Bearing this in mind, it is unsurprising that he is careful about drawing lines around his private life and finding the downtime necessary to decompress away from the Hollywood pressure cooker. “I certainly don’t talk about my personal life to journalists”, he says, laughing. “I’m really good at switching off. I can prioritise. That’s really the secret – knowing how to avoid getting snow-blind and just focusing on what’s right in front of you. When you’re not working, don’t worry about the other things that you could be doing. Just switch off. You have to wind down for a bit in order for your metabolism to slow so you can actually get the rest that your body needs.” b


BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH AT A GLANCE • Born Benedict Timothy Carlton Cumberbatch on 19 July 1976 in London, England • Both parents, Timothy Carlton and Wanda Ventham, were actors • His great-grandfather, Henry Arnold Cumberbatch CMG, was the consul general of Queen Victoria in Turkey • His grandfather, Henry Carlton Cumberbatch, was a decorated submarine officer of both World Wars, and a prominent figure of London high society • Attended boarding schools from the age of eight • He was educated at Brambletye School in West Sussex and was an arts scholar at Harrow School • Was involved in numerous Shakespearean works at school and made his acting debut as Titania, Queen of the Fairies, in A Midsummer Night's Dream when he was 12 • Cumberbatch's drama teacher called him "the best schoolboy actor" he had ever worked with • He was nominated for an Olivier Award for Best Performance in a Supporting Role for his performance as George Tesman in Hedda Gabler • In 2004, he landed his first main part in television as Stephen Hawking in Hawking, for which he was nominated for the BAFTA TV Award for Best Actor and won the Golden Nymph for Television Films – Best Performance by an Actor • In 2010, Cumberbatch portrayed Vincent van Gogh in Van Gogh: Painted with Words • In the same year, Cumberbatch began playing Sherlock Holmes in the first series of the joint BBC/PBS television series Sherlock, to critical acclaim • In 2006, Cumberbatch played William Pitt the Younger in Amazing Grace. The role garnered Cumberbatch a nomination for the London Film Critics Circle "British Breakthrough Acting Award". Cumberbatch subsequently appeared in supporting roles in Atonement (2007) and The Other Boleyn Girl (2008) • In 2013, Cumberbatch also appeared in J. J. Abrams's sequel Star Trek Into Darkness as Khan, the antagonist of the film • In August 2014, Cumberbatch was announced to voice and do performance capture for the tiger Shere Khan for Warner Bros. Pictures's film adaptation of Jungle Book: Origins alongside Christian Bale and Cate Blanchett



It’s not always easy to turn your life around, but for Carol West and her husband Andrew, it came from as simple a thing as changing their diet.

The healthy alternative




arol was working in a nursery and Andrew was working as a police officer in Leicestershire before they struck out on their own. They were working very hard on four businesses at one time. Modern life is tough enough on its own, but when you’re trying to run multiple businesses with 70 employees whilst maintaining a family life, it can really take it out of you. The stresses of pushing themselves so hard had far-reaching consequences for their health. “We lived on takeaways, because we were working so hard”, she remembers. “I was on a bottle of wine most nights and a minimum of two litres of Coke a day. Because we were working so hard and we were making quite a bit of money, we’d just go out and eat and drink with no regard for our health. I was putting weight on consistently, and I was struggling with lots of digestive issues. My digestive system was a mess. Doctors were looking at doing exploratory operations to find out what was going on. I was stressed. I wasn’t sleeping. I was in a bit of a downward spiral. Andrew wasn’t doing much better, with chronic fatigue syndrome (ME), persistent acid reflux and general malaise. They were both obese and bereft of any energy. Despite this, they still weren’t moved to change their lifestyles. The routine of bad eating had become too engrained. They attended a Tony Robbins event in 2006, where motivational speaker Joseph McClendon spoke very persuasively about the perils of eating poorly and the benefits of giving up meat, alcohol and dairy. Even then, their immediate response was not to change their diet. ‘He was actually quite an inspirational guy,’ Carol remembers. ‘But on that day he was saying no meat, no alcohol and we didn’t want to hear that. So we just walked out and went out for a steak and wine dinner.’ Six months later, Carol’s doctors were discussing exploratory surgery, and Andrew’s doctors were telling them that contacting Type 2 Diabetes was inevitable. They picked up the book they had received at the event, and Carol decided to go vegetarian. She immediately started seeing results and losing weight. This prompted them to delve deeper into diet and health research. The more they discovered, the more encouraged they were. They started juicing and had a green smoothie for

We lived on takeaways, because we were working so hard. I was on a bottle of wine most nights and a minimum of two litres of Coke a day


breakfast every morning. After they started seeing these benefits, they decided to channel their new healthy lifestyle into their businesses. Carol had been training in colonic hydrotherapy and Andrew had done some training in hypnotherapy. They were also struggling with their other businesses and decided to sell them. They opened their first clinic in Leicestershire called Obsidian Health, offering colonic hydrotherapy, smoking cessation, hypnotherapy and counselling. They loved the work. It was at this time when they received an interesting email. “Somebody emailed me to saying they had a similar business in Spain they would like to sell”, she says. “It was exactly the same as what we were doing in the UK and on the same scale. We went to view it in the October, agreed to the sale in the November and on 3 January we actually loaded the van and drove to Spain.” They took over the clinic and set about enjoying life in the sun. They devised a three-day detox programme involving colonic hydrotherapy and juicing. This was very well received by their clients and created a demand for a retreat that would promote discipline and good health. “The three-day detox took off unbelievably well”, she says. “The clinic was packed, and people were having to stay in local hotels and B&Bs. This caused some problems, as it was difficult for our clients to be sitting with their juices watching people eating


FEATURE THE BEST YOU paella and drinking wine. We spoke to an estate agent who helped us find a villa. That’s how the retreat started. We launched with a very simple web page and a did bit of Google advertising.” Their initial plan was to keep it as a simple retreat, but they were prompted to investigate further into the science of nutrition and include this aspect in their new business. Carol completed a course in plant-based nutrition held by Dr Colin T Campbell. With Andrew she attended various seminars organised by Dr Neil Barnard, Dr John McDougall, Dr Caldwell Essletyne, Dr Jeff Novick and Dr Joel Furlman. They studied everything they could find and were amazed to find that the work they had been doing was backed up by solid science. Carol qualified as a juice therapist and as a plantbased nutritionist and also learned the various food programmes so we could offer a full approach. They opened the Obsidian Retreat in February 2011, focussing on Diet, Exercise, Education and Mind-Set. Success was slow boiling, until they had a success story of one of their clients combating diabetes published in the Mail On Sunday. From that point on they were inundated with bookings. They have had guests from all over the world including Australia, United States, Nigeria, Denmark, and Russia, with the bulk of their clientele based in the UK. They have opened a juice cafe in their old hometown in Leicestershire and are currently building a frozen-juice venture. They set up a UK business called Healthy Stuff Online Ltd, from which they produce and sell online frozen juice programmes. After only eight months, they were selling approximately £50,000 of frozen juices a month.

And all of this came from a simple decision to eat healthier. “The biggest joy for me is seeing people change”, Carol says. “The magic is watching somebody come to the retreat and after two or three days see that little chink of light start to come through. And have them come up to us after their final assessment saying, ‘Oh, my God, I’ve lost so much weight’ or ‘I feel so much better’… It is a true joy.” One of the biggest challenges they have to face is a bewilderingly negative attitude towards healthy eating from the public. “We have to deal with people’s emotional connection with food”, she says. “That’s the biggest challenge at times. People come to us for two weeks and say that their biggest fear is going home and telling their family that they have stopped eating meat. Some of them would rather compromise everything they’ve done with us than to have that argument. I have to come up with ways for them to be able to integrate back into the family. People put up mental barriers. It’s the passion for helping people that motivates me. Not just our clients, but our staff as well. As many people as possible. So, after all this success, what is next? “We are looking at launching the food range on a commercial basis”, she says. “We’re looking into putting together another retreat somewhere else in the world. I’m also keen to pull together all of the information I have in my head into a book at some point. My ultimate goal is to make the world a healthy place.” From the sounds of things, she’s already succeeded. b

CAROL WEST AT A GLANCE • • • • • • • •


Before 2008, Carol and Andrew had very poor diets and bad health In 2008, they opened a clinic in Ashby de la Zouch called Obsidian Health In 2010, they moved to Spain and took over The Kamala Centre, which for Carol was a dream realised In 2011, they opened their first Obsidian Retreat The retreat was accepted as European partners for the PCRM in 2013 This year they launched Obsidian Juices in the UK Carol attributes her newfound energy for her new life to her change in diet Big plans for the future





Life Without Limits


To read a book for the first time is to make an acquaintance with a new friend; to read it for a second time is to meet an old one.� – Chinese Saying

Great reading, viewing and listening to empower, entertain, enrich, delight and enhance. The Best You rounds up classics and new books and media products that will make a positive difference in your life.




Cumberbatch consistently ranks on lists ranging from sex appeal to global influence. In 2012, he beat David Beckham in the former and U.S. President Barack Obama in the latter. Increasingly, part of Cumberbatch’s job involves the role of celebrity. Benedict Cumberbatch is at a pivotal point in his profession, and his career trajectory, especially as documented in entertainment media, permits a closer examination of just what it means to be a celebrity or star in Britain or the U.S. and how an actor may be perceived very differently in London or Hollywood. This performance biography is an analysis of a man in transition from working actor to multimedia star, as well as an examination of the balance between actor and celebrity. It looks at what makes this actor so well-suited to play one of popular culture’s iconic characters, Sherlock Holmes, and how Sherlock is so well suited to propel Cumberbatch toward greater global fame.

Porter offers a serious, well-researched, eloquently written.” – H. O’Sullivan






Who has the most power to stop and prevent bullying? Teachers? Parents? The Principal of the Universe? No, no, and no way! When it comes to changing bullying behaviour, nobody has more power than upstanders. All the people who see bullying, or know it’s happening, and decide to do something about it. How strong are upstanders? They’re stronger than a snarling seventh grader; more powerful than a petty put-down; able to delete Internet rumours with a single click. When BYstanders choose to act as UPstanders, they are real superheroes! With full-colour cartoons and humorous, kid-friendly text, Stand Up to Bullying! teaches kids how to safely take a stand against bullying, support kids who are targeted, and spread the word that bullying is not cool—it’s cruel. The power to end bullying starts with one person: you.

My daughter’s best friend was being given a difficult time at school, and this book really helped her.” – Mary Edgard





At the age of 50, Barry Landsberg was totally obsessed with food and absolutely loathed exercise. When he was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes, something clicked and he decided to take responsibility for his health and his life by making some radical changes. At 62, Barry is now slim, fit and living a much healthier lifestyle. His blood sugar has been at a healthy level for over 10 years without the use of medication, and as a result he has been removed from the diabetic register. The Barry you see today is unrecognisable. His achievements include grading at kickboxing to a brown belt level, running two half marathons and completing a one-mile swim. All from someone who once could hardly walk without getting out of breath!

I found this book motivating and inspiring.” – Tony Blake





Do you wish you ate less? Do you eat to control your feelings? Do you ever feel frustrated and hopeless about your weight? Do you wish that you felt differently about food, about yourself, and about life? Let Paul McKenna help you! Emotional eating is the number one cause of obesity in the western world, but Paul McKenna has made an amazing breakthrough in his mission to help people lose weight. This amazing new system is aimed at getting beneath the issue of weight loss to eradicate the root cause of over-eating. The programme in this book, DVD and CD set is designed to help you bring about dynamic, lasting change - a gentle breakthrough to help you transform your body, your relationship with food and, indeed, your entire life.

This is one of the most thorough books that Paul has ever written.” – George Le Tigre





Our culture is riddled with destructive myths about money and prosperity that are severely limiting our power, creativity, and financial potential. In Killing Sacred Cows, Garrett B Gunderson boldly exposes ingrained fallacies and misguided traditions in the world of personal finance. He presents a revolutionary perspective that can create unprecedented opportunity and wealth for individuals. Our financial lives are intimately connected to our societal contributions, and we must be financially free in order to achieve our fullest potential. Yet, most people are held captive in their financial lives by misinformation, propaganda, and a lack of knowledge. Killing Sacred Cows is a must-read for brave individuals willing to question common assumptions and teachings, overcome the herd mentality, break through financial myths, and live a purposeful, passionate, and prosperous life.

This book was more than a breath of fresh air to me, it was a hurricane!” – Dr. Adam Smith




What do you want to be remembered for? What are your relationships like with those around you? How does life treat you - and how do you treat your life? There is so much good in you. Enrich your life with the passion you feel and the connections you make.

Life Without Limits



Anti-bullying Week is held by the Anti-Bullying Alliance every November. We talk to them about how we can put an end to bullying


Jim Aitkins is back with his regular column. This month it’s all about perspective


…to be a journalist? We chat with Lester Kiewit, who is a renowned broadcast journalist




Each November, the Anti-Bullying Alliance, hosted by the National Children’s Bureau, coordinates Anti-Bullying Week in schools and communities across England. This year we are calling on children, teachers, parents and carers to work together to stop the bullying of disabled children and those with special educational needs (SEN).


nti-Bullying Week provides us with an opportunity to talk openly about the effects of bullying on the lives of children and young people and the ways we can take action to stop it. The best schools are rarely those that say “we have no bullying here”; rather, they are the schools that take positive steps to prevent bullying for all pupils; they are the ones that take quick and effective action when it happens. They recognise that some young people are more vulnerable to bullying than others and they provide a welcoming and inclusive environment for all pupils The latest research has found that disabled primary school pupils are twice as likely as other pupils to suffer from persistent bullying, and reports suggest that 8 out of 10 young people with learning difficulties experience bullying at school. We also know that over 90% of parents of children with Asperger Syndrome report that there child has been bullied. This is not acceptable, and this


The latest research has found that disabled primary school pupils are twice as likely as other pupils to suffer from persistent bullying

being Anti-Bullying Week, we have an opportunity to share the experiences of these young people and take collective action to stop bullying. Our aims for the week are: l To stop the bullying of disabled children and those with special educational needs by equipping schools, colleges and youth services leaders with resources to encourage youth-led anti-bullying initiatives that foster inclusive attitudes amongst children and young people. l To educate those who support and work with children to recognise those who may be particularly vulnerable to bullying - encouraging an inclusive approach to all anti-bullying education. l To ensure that the school and wider community understand that the use of any discriminatory language is wrong and will not be tolerated. This includes challenging disablist language. Disabled children and those with special educational needs may have certain characteristics


that make them more vulnerable to bullying. These include low self-esteem and a tendency to internalise problems; differences in physical attributes; shyness and submissiveness; language and communication difficulties and inappropriate social behaviour. It may also be the case that disabled children are absent from school more than their peers and may spent extra time with support staff – both factors that make forming friendships difficult, increasing their likelihood of being bullied. However, practices within some schools can exasperate the situation for disabled young people and make it more difficult for them to form friendships and socialise with the peer group. These include overprotecting disabled pupils, teaching them away from other pupils in ‘special’ classes and not adapting the physical environment so they can take part in the same activities as their peers. We know from research that schools that emphasise ‘cohesion’, promote peer friendships and ‘caring’ staff attitudes are less likely to have bullying behaviour. Classrooms in which young people are encouraged to be willing to play and ‘hang out with’ disabled young people are those that report the least bullying. Acceptance (particularly in non-classroom and playground settings) by large numbers of peers (numerous ‘bystanders’ rather than a few good friends) is also a ‘protective factor’. Schools have a responsibility to focus on social issues; to teach social and communication skills; and to foster the kinds of interactions between disabled young people and those with special educational needs and their mainstream peers that will make bullying less likely to happen or

We know that vital to the success of tackling all forms of bullying is working with children and young people, parents and carers


to be tolerated. There is also some evidence that actively teaching disability awareness and helping young people to understand and empathise with disabled peers can be productive. We know that vital to the success of tackling all forms of bullying is working with children and young people, parents and carers. The Anti-Bullyilng Alliance has produced a range of resources to support schools as they take part in Anti-Bullying Week – but we also want to make sure that this becomes part of a wider initiative to create safe environments where all children and young people can learn and thrive without fear of bullying. A range of resources are available to support schools in hosting activities for Anti-Bullying Week, and the official campaign pack is free to download online, offering ideas for activities as well as links to further information and support to help tackle bullying. To find out more about the Anti-Bullying Alliance, find Anti-Bullying Week 2014 resources, or to access our free training please visit our website www.anti-bullyingalliance.org.uk. b

For more information, please contact the media office on 020 7843 6045/47. Out of hours mobile: 07721 097 033.



THEIR INSPIRATIONAL There are so many challenges in the world, and this month is all about bringing awareness to three of them: men’s health, diabetes and bullying. We have three amazing survival stories from people who have overcome these challenges.



Back in 2006 I had a bit of pain and discomfort in my right testicle. It was sore for a couple of days, and then I went home one night and just had a check of my testicle and found a lump. I looked online to see what it might be, and scared the life out of myself with the diagnoses you can find on Google. The end diagnosis was that it might be testicular cancer. It can be a lot of other things, but cancer may be one of the outcomes. So that was enough to spur me to go to see the doctor and get it checked. After that I was referred to the hospital for further tests. I had an ultrasound. The doctor took me into his office, sat me down and delivered the lines you never want to hear. “There’s a 99 per cent chance you have testicular cancer.” I was in the room for another half hour or so, and I can remember almost none of that conversation. As soon as they broke those words, “You have cancer”, my brain kind of shut down. You think, “Christ, you know, am I going to die? What does this mean? What’s going to happen?” Things accelerated pretty quickly from there in terms of having blood tests and getting booked into surgery straight away. My friends and family all rallied round, but telling my people I had cancer was some of the hardest phone calls I’ve ever had to make. I’d gone on my own to the hospital thinking it was probably just going to be nothing. I had to come home and tell my dad that I had cancer, and phone my mum and tell her over the phone, and phone my friends and tell them. It was incredibly hard, but actually they were awesome. My friends especially reacted with shock as you’d expect, but very quickly, within a matter of seconds were kind of taking the mick, having a joke about it. Life now is good. I’m a healthy, normal 35 year old. I have testosterone replacement, so that provides me with the vital hormones that I need to stay manly and do all the things I used to do. I’m very active, fit and healthy and have a long life ahead of me. I have regular check-ups and they’re still dealing with, certainly the mental aspect of what I’ve been through over the last eight years, and that has been a big challenge. But physically I’m 100 per cent fit. I do a lot of cycling. It’s very comfy on my bike now, which is a bonus. My advice for people who are going through what I went through is just talk about it. Take the support that’s offered, don’t be afraid to ask for support. Movember is that time of year when we’re having these conversations. Growing moustaches is an awesome way to raise awareness and get young guys aware of the risks of things like testicular cancer. It’s a fantastic way to start those conversations, get it on people’s radar and start to normalise that and mental health a bit more.





I remember that I first started getting bullied when I was in primary school. I was one of the only ones in my class who had a learning disability. Because I did things differently, the other children in the class used to call me names like ‘Stupid’ and ‘Dumb’. I never told the teacher, though, because I thought everyone would say I am ‘telling tales’. This made me feel scared and alone. The bullying carried on in secondary school. I was very quiet in class, and just kept my head down. The bullies would pick on me if I got something wrong. Because I didn’t want to get involved with the drinking and smoking that some of the other people were doing, I got picked on even more. This got worse and it got physical. I would get beaten up both during and after school. I was still too embarrassed to tell anyone. When I finally did tell the teachers, they didn’t believe me. In the end, it got so bad that I couldn’t even eat. I decided I needed to tell my family. I then had meetings with the school to get it sorted, but things didn’t change much. When I went to college, things carried on exactly the same. I tried to make new friends, but I found it really hard because of all that I’d been through in the past. Then things began to change. I went a training centre called Rathbone in Birmingham. They help young people to achieve qualifications. There I was introduced to a new group of friends. They were all doing childcare. They seemed really friendly, which I found hard to believe, as everyone in my past had been so nasty. For the first 2 months, I kept asking, “Are you sure you’re my friends?” and they would say, “We’re your friends no matter what.” They see something in me that other people never took the time to see. I am a lot happier now I have these friends. I still remember what it was like when I was bullied, but it doesn’t affect me like it did. My advice to anyone being bullied is don’t be afraid to tell people what’s happening, even though it’s scary. I also say just be yourself and don’t hide who you really are. Just like me, you’ll find the right friends in the end.


As long as I can remember, I have loved eating. During my early teens, my school gave out exercise as a punishment. If we misbehaved, we had to run around the tennis courts, and the worse the crime, the more rounds we had to do. This probably was a factor in my strong avoidance of exercise of any kind. By the time I reached fifty, I was habitually overeating, locked in a belief I could never lose weight, and I had accepted that I would be overweight for the rest of my life. All of this changed with the shock of being diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes. I spent some time deciding how I would handle it. What I wished for was to reach a healthy weight and blood sugar level and maintain it easily and naturally for the rest of my life. To achieve this almost impossible dream, I mindfully chose what habits I wanted to cultivate, what foods I wanted to start liking, so that every day was an investment towards a lifelong healthy lifestyle that was increasingly easy to maintain. In addition I developed an arsenal of mental tools to help me. I chose the gym as the place to start exercising, and also to gradually start moving to healthier eating. I learned to enjoy eating slightly smaller amounts, and more importantly slowly switched from sweet and processed food to more nutritious food, also reducing my carbohydrate intake. Eventually I lost 40kg and my blood sugar became normal again. 12 years later, I was discharged from the diabetic register. I still exercise regularly, and I really enjoy being fit. I also still love eating, but now in a healthy way, with no feeling of deprivation whatsoever. I am an ex-diabetic, and with my current lifestyle, I intend to stay that way.






Jim Aitkins is an American writer who is still learning all about life. He finds that learning goes great with a small dose of humour, and we tend to agree. This month, he looks at life’s perception via a television installation.


im mounted his flat screen television on the wall. He then sat down and watched a movie. It worked just fine. Then Don came over. The moment Don walked into the room and looked at the television, he said to Tim, “Oh, that won’t work.” Since Tim had already watched the setup operating perfectly, he had no idea what Don was talking about – until Don sat down on the sofa and smiled at Tim. At that point, Tim knew immediately what the problem would be. “You see”, said Don, “the couch is positioned at a somewhat ‘L’ angle, perpendicular from the television. So, one person on the sofa can watch the television positioned where it is on the wall without any problem. However, if a second person joins the

first person on the couch and they both want to see the screen, there will be a problem.” Tim had placed the television in that place on the wall with one perspective in mind: his position from his recliner. An eye-level placement made perfect sense – to Tim. Of course Tim’s perspective made sense to Tim – until he gained the perspective of someone who has never seen his television from the angle that he has always viewed the screen, and who has only viewed the TV from an angle different from the one familiar to him. This elevated Tim’s view of the situation and made him realize he needed to elevate the screen, which he did. The analogy here is obvious. By not broadening our perspective, we limit ourselves. Unless something

or someone introduces something outside of our perspective – some new information, or a dramatically different point of view – it is all too easy for us to assume that ours is the right (or even the only) perspective. This is why elevation is always required. But do you really need to experience such a powerful visual queue in order to adjust your thinking to become more inclusive of other peoples’ points of view and perspectives? Let this serve as a reminder to make it a habit to put yourself, and keep yourself, in a state of curiosity. Think about how others might see things differently. Wonder what you might have in common with people who see things differently to you in politics, in religion, in lifestyle choices, etc. One individual’s own perspective tends to be limited to their personal knowledge and life experiences. This is, indeed, a huge limitation because almost all of us work with and/or live with others. When that limitation is coupled with a delusion of infallibility (the idea that my outlook on things is the only outlook to have), it represents an impassable obstacle to personal growth. Instead of assuming everyone sees things the way you do, make it a habit to ask quality questions that elevate your thinking above and beyond your perspective. It is always better to assume that everyone sees things differently than you and that they have a good reason to do so than to assume everyone agrees with you because there is no reason why they wouldn’t. b




journalist? Part of being the best you can be is focusing on what it takes to get there. We’re continuing the “What does it take…?” column, which looks at this aspect of being the best. This month, we’re chatting with renowned journalist Lester Kiewit. WHAT IS THE BEST THING ABOUT BEING A JOURNALIST? I guess I just love knowing ‘stuff’. The career forces you to read up a lot on so many things, to be up-to-date with current events. But I guess if you don’t have an interest in current affairs, it’s not the career for you.

AND THE MOST CHALLENGING? The deadlines are stressful. I work in broadcast news. So if your deadline is 1pm, and you miss it, you don’t get 1pm back. You’re late. So there’s tremendous pressure. But you learn to feed off that pressure and perform at your best.


HOW DID YOU BECOME A JOURNALIST? Midway through high school I knew I wanted to be a newsman. I had already started reading up, choosing subjects, and doing extra-curricular activities that would help me in a potential career. After high school, I enrolled at Cape Peninsula University of Technology for three years. I got an internship at a talk radio station at 19 years old. And the rest, as they say, is history.


I have to arrive at the office at about 8:30am. By this time, I’ve already checked my twitter feed, the news wires, and have listened to the news on the radio while driving in. At the office, I scan the papers. I then have a chat with my news editor on what I have planned for the day. A camera operator and I then go out to do our shoot and do interviews. Back at the office, I’ll script my story. Then I go into the video editing room and put it all together. I usually leave the office at about 5pm. What I’ve learnt while being a journalist is that you’re ALWAYS on call, always on standby. My phone is permanently switched on in case of a breaking story.

IS THIS SOMETHING YOU SEE YOURSELF DOING FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE? Yes, actually. I see myself as becoming a news and broadcasting veteran.


The TV news industry in South Africa is still very young, so there’s tremendous potential for growth.

WHAT MADE YOU WANT TO BECOME A JOURNALIST? I’ve never had that idealistic ‘I want to change the world’ bent. It’s just that from a very young age, and in this case about eight years old, I was interested in the telling and recording of history. I grew up during the transition from apartheid to democracy in South Africa, which was a fascinating time. I saw journalists as being at the coalface of history. I wanted to experience that too.

WHICH ASSETS ARE MOST USEFUL IN YOUR CAREER? You have to be resourceful. You have to make magic from the little you have. Equipment breaks. Wi-Fi dies. Pens run out of ink. But you need to make a plan! The deadline still looms.


WHAT’S YOUR PROUDEST MOMENT? I was involved in the broadcast of the funeral of Former President Nelson Mandela. I remember being live on TV as the President’s cortege drove passed me. It was erringly beautiful. It was my proudest moment as a South African in honouring our founding president, and a very proud moment for me as a broadcast journalist.

WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE? A journalist, marine biologist, doctor, or a lawyer. I went for my first choice.

WHEN DID YOU LAST SEE THE SUNRISE? Last Sunday. I drove my fiancée to an early morning marathon.

HOW DO YOU RELAX? I sleep. I sleep a tremendous amount. It’s the only way I can truly unplug from news and media.



I consider myself a ‘serious’ news journalist. I cover politics, court and crime. It’s what I’m interested in, and that’s what I think influences our world and society. But I’m not totally opposed to the ‘fluff’ stuff. Journalism and broadcasting should also provide entertainment and escape. I wouldn’t disparage the soft news journalist; I’ll just say it’s not what I do, and it’s material I consume very little of.

I wanted to be at the release of Nelson Mandela from prison, but I was only six years old then. I watched it on TV. My parents went to the Grand Parade where Mandela made his first speech after 27 years in prison. While my friends and cousins played outside on that Sunday afternoon, I was glued to the TV indoors. b

Just being a good journalist. That’s all.


WHICH LIVING PERSON DO YOU MOST ADMIRE AND WHY? I admire Archbishop Desmond Tutu. He’s a true moral voice, without being moralistic.






Feeling good about yourself makes the joy shine from your eyes and your skin. It makes others respond to you in new ways and it gives you a whole new outlook on life. Looking good draws others to you and enhances your life in ways you haven’t yet imagined. It’s great to find new ways to feel and look good now!

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Libby Dowling from Diabetes UK has some information to share about how to decrease your chances of developing Type 2 Diabetes

ARE YOU EATING EMOTIONALLY? Dr. Lisa Turner looks at the reasons why we overeat. She finds out that our emotions often override our appetites

WHAT’S THE DIET DOWN LOW? Nutritionist Rhiannon Lambert looks at the pros and cons of some of the most popular fad diets




AWARE There are 3.8 million people in the UK with diabetes, the vast majority with Type 2, and by 2025 that number is expected to grow to more than 5 million. Libby Dowling, a clinical advisor from Diabetes UK, explains how you can reduce your risk of developing Type 2 diabetes.


LIBBY DOWLING Left undiagnosed or poorly managed, Type 2 diabetes can have a devastating impact, not only on the person who has the condition but also on the lives of their family. Type 1 diabetes develops if the body cannot produce any insulin. Nobody knows for sure why these insulin-producing cells have been destroyed but the most likely cause is the body having an abnormal (autoimmune) reaction to the cells. It has nothing to do with weight or lifestyle. Type 2 diabetes – which accounts for about 90 per cent of cases develops when the body can still make insulin but not enough, or when the insulin that is produced does not work properly. Up to 80 per cent of cases of Type 2 diabetes could be prevented or delayed through healthy lifestyle changes. Because the symptoms of Type 2 diabetes – feeling thirsty, needing to go to the loo more often, feeling tired or losing weight – can come on slowly and often be put down to getting older, people can live with the condition for up to 10 years before being diagnosed. This puts them at greater risk of developing any number of the serious complications associated with diabetes. That’s why it’s so important for people to understand the importance of having a risk assessment for Type 2 diabetes, which enables one to understand his or her own personal risk of developing the condition. Once people have their risk checked, either online - www.diabetes. org.uk/riskscore - or by visiting a pharmacy, those at high risk will then be asked to visit their GP for a test for Type 2 diabetes and given information about how to reduce their risk. Alternatively, if you are concerned that you might be at high risk, you can speak directly to your GP. As well as identifying those at high risk, risk assessments can also identify some of the estimated 850,000 people in the UK who have undiagnosed Type 2 diabetes. This gives people the chance to start managing their condition and so reduce their risk of developing longterm complications.

Blindness, amputations, kidney failure, heart attack and stroke are just some of the complications that Type 2 diabetes can lead to. Some people mistakenly believe Type 2 diabetes is a ‘mild’ condition. If it is detected early and managed with treatment and lifestyle changes it is possible to live a long and healthy life. But people need to understand that it can have very serious consequences. The good news is that, for many people, finding out they are at high risk of Type 2 diabetes or being diagnosed with it can be the start of a process of making healthy lifestyle changes. Some people who discover they are at high risk of the condition lose weight and their risk reduces as a result. For those who are diagnosed with the condition, making the necessary adjustments to diet and lifestyle can have a major impact on the successful management of Type 2 diabetes. Sticking to the medication


prescribed for you and ensuring you get the healthcare you are entitled to – visit www.diabetes.org.uk/15essentials - will also help. If people want to reduce their chances of developing Type 2 diabetes, making small changes that you can stick to in the long term is a good approach. Up the amount of vegetables and fruit you eat and reduce your intake of sugar, fat and salt. Try to have more meals cooked from scratch, so you know exactly what’s in them. And check the food labels carefully on ready meals and go for ones that are low in fat, salt and sugar. When it comes to exercise, it’s great to do some walking and make exercise part of your everyday regime. So try and walk instead of always getting in the car to make a short errand. Or take up something that you know that you will enjoy and stick to, such as cycling or going dancing.


HERE TO HELP If you would like to speak to someone from Diabetes UK then contact the charity’s Careline on 0345 123 2399.




ARE YOU EATING EMOTIONALLY? When it comes to weight loss, there’s really no magic to it. We all know the ‘secret’ formula for losing weight: eat less, move more, drink more water, breathe more deeply. If we all know what we should do, why is losing weight so hard? Dr. Lisa Turner offers some answers.


hy do we eat when we say we won’t? Why do we eat things we know aren’t good for us? Why do we eat when we’re not even hungry? The answer is that we are eating for emotional reasons. Emotional eating is any eating you do the purpose of which is not meeting your physical needs for energy, nutrition or vitamins. There’s a deep reason that you want to eat. Here are the top signs that you’re eating emotionally.

YOU EAT EVEN THOUGH YOU’RE NOT REALLY HUNGRY Anytime you eat even though there’s no feeling of physical hunger you are emotionally eating. This can be snacking or continuing to eat even when you’re full. If your body is telling you that you’ve finished your meal, but you take another helping or keep nibbling at your plate, you’re emotionally eating.

SUDDEN ONSET OF HUNGER Emotional hunger often comes

on without warning. For some, the experience is almost painful. So, why do we eat emotionally, and how can we stop?

“I DESERVE IT” This stems from childhood. As a child, you were probably rewarded for good behaviour with an ice cream or sweets. Now that you’re able to reward yourself any time you like, you do (perhaps too often). The pleasure of the food is a deep emotional reward. To prevent this, find another

LISA TURNER way to reward yourself. Even collecting ‘points’ for yourself that add up to a bigger reward like a new outfit or a spa day. This might seem childish, like a kid’s reward chart, and that’s because it is – but it works. It’s tapping into the same neurological systems of reward that are triggered when you reward yourself with food.

SNACKING WHEN YOU’RE BORED Snacking when you’re bored is common. You might be watching TV and be mindlessly eating crisps or corn chips, or some other nibble. The reason we eat when we’re bored is deeper than the need to be entertained. It’s a sign that you feel your life lacks meaning and a deeper purpose. It’s common for people who are passionately engaged in their lives, their hobbies, or their careers to forget to eat because they are so engrossed. Find something that fulfils you. It might mean taking a hard look at your career, or finding an engrossing hobby that gives you a deep sense of

achievement and satisfaction. You need to find away to engage both your body and your mind.

I’LL FINISH MY PLATE We’re commonly taught that we must finish our plate. During times of scarcity, this may have been essential, but now that food is plentiful and its supply reliable, always finishing what we are given can be disastrous for our health.

EMOTIONAL AVOIDANCE Very often we suppress unpleasant emotions because they feel too uncomfortable for us. Food becomes a way for us to do this. Emotions are scary for most people, but the more we get used to feeling them, the easier it becomes. Often we don’t allow ourselves to feel them because we’re afraid that we might act out on them in ways that could harm our relationships or career, when in fact the opposite is often the case. By finding ways to speak out clearly and express your


needs you’ll find that the situation actually become less emotive. Usually you’re feeling emotional because you didn’t speak out. Speaking out can relieve the tension.

THE CHEMICAL HIT One reason we eat certain foods is that they release chemicals that cause us to feel relaxed and happy. If we’re stressed, we will crave certain kinds of food for the chemical response they trigger in the brain. They actually release opioids that mimic the effects of drugs. The good news is that the brain can release the same chemicals without eating the food. Exercise, laughter and hugs are just a few ways you can do this. Emotional eating doesn’t need to ruin your diet or health. By mastering your emotions, you’ll be able to take control of your eating habits for good. For free instant access to our emotional resilience e-course, go to www.recoverfromabuse.com





With a new diet craze making the rounds every few weeks, it’s tricky to know what dietary advice to follow. The demonization of ‘fat’, the calorie-restrictive diets, the complete elimination of carbohydrates are just a few examples of confusing media messages surrounding nutrition and health. Nutritionist Rhiannon Lambert offers some advice on the diets everybody is talking about.


ecent scientific research has been heavily focused on sugar and processed foods (which I feel is a right move) and the effects they have on both weight management and one’s risk of developing metabolic diseases. I am an advocate of a healthy lifestyle and eating what I call ‘real’ and ‘clean’ foods; faddy diets are not good for your body.

If you wish to book a private consultation with Rhiannon Lambert to ensure you put the appropriate plan into practice, visit www.rhitrition.com


Based on a low-carbohydrate and high protein diet with strict rules to follow, you can eat as much as you want during the four phases of the diet, as long as you stick to the rules. It is possible to lose weight fairly quickly during this diet, but, ultimately, it is not a healthy way of going about this. The diet is not nutritionally balanced, which is emphasised by the requirement of a multi-vitamin supplement and additional fibre added from oat bran. If you are unable to follow the rules of this diet, there also may be long-term health risks alongside the short-term side effects such as bad breath, dry mouth, tiredness, dizziness, insomnia and nausea from cutting out carbs. (The only fuel your brain can use is from carbohydrates).

5:2 DIET

This diet involves intermittent fasting (IF) – where you eat normally five days a week and fast on the other two days – which works by reducing calorie intake. This diet has been found to significantly lower one’s risk of developing chronic diseases such as type 2 diabetes and may help lower the risk of certain obesity-related cancers, such as breast cancer. However, if you are considering it, you should first talk to your GP to see if it is suitable for you. Not everyone can safely fast. It is important to remember nutrients are equally important as numbers. I’d only advise following this diet if you chose to abide by a balanced eating plan devised by a nutritionist to avoid nutritional deficiencies, dehydration or over-eating on non-fast days. Make sure to ask yourself if this diet is maintainable for you?





Another low-carb, high-protein diet, the Paleo Diet focuses on food that can be hunted, fished (meat & seafood) or gathered (eggs, nuts, seeds, vegetables, herbs and spices). Also known as the caveman diet, this is a good way of eliminating anything processed such as wheat, dairy, potatoes and refined sugars, which were not present before the Palaeolithic Era. It can be rather dangerous to exclude whole food groups without seeking nutritional advice first. Nutrient deficiencies may arise from this diet, but if you adapt it to cater to your nutritional requirements this is a great way of ‘eating clean’.


This diet promotes good healthy-eating habits such as cutting down on meat consumption, refined sugar, caffeine, processed foods (acid-forming foods) and upping the intake of vegetables, fruit and whole grains otherwise known as ‘alkaline foods’. The belief is that excess acid in the body turns to fat and contributes to conditions such as, osteoporosis and kidney and liver disorders. The body actually maintains its pH balance regardless of diet and, once again, cutting out whole food groups without consulting a health professional is not advisable. That being said, I think the Alkaline Diet contains a number of sound dietary principles.


This is a great rounded diet, but it’s tough to get into. Known as the low-GI (glycaemic index) diet, this was originally developed for patients in the US with heart conditions. There’s no calorie counting, and the diet includes three meals a day with snacks and an exercise plan. As tempting as its promise of a weight loss of up to 13lbs in the first might be, the South Beach Diet isn’t for everybody. Remember, this is not just fat loss; water and carbs are also reduced, and they’ll eventually be replaced when you begin eating normally again. Overall, once you get past the first phase of the diet, the basic principles of healthy and nutritionally balanced eating and exercise are great to follow.

The food that you eat can be the difference between feeling merely okay and feeling on top of the world, both mentally and physically. Ultimately, any nutritional programme should be carefully considered. No single plan is suitable for all.






Wealth [n] “happiness,” also “prosperity in abundance of possessions or riches” from Middle English “wele”, meaning “wellbeing”. Riches [n] “valued possessions, money, property." Make money and bring greater wealth to EVERY area of your life.

Life Without Limits


RELATIONSHIPS IN BUSINESS When it comes to sensible business, Steve Bolton knows what he’s talking about. Turns out the way you treat people is kind of important

QUINTESSENTIAL WEALTH hat is it? And why should you have it? Garrett Gunderson W explains why it is so important

THE ROCKY ROAD TO SUCCESS The Best You looks at some historical figures who didn’t have success handed to them on a silver platter



IN BUSINESS Steve Bolton, founder of Platinum Property Partners, understands the importance of using good relationships to grow your business. He offers some guidance so you can do the same.


he legendary Jim Rohn concluded that we are likely to become, in terms of wealth, health, and happiness, the average of the five people with whom we spend the most time. We are subconsciously influenced in many ways by those closest to us. My interpretation of this study is that to be a success, you should surround yourself with the right people. It can therefore be very enlightening to consider the five people that you spend most of your time with and ask if they are helping or hindering you professionally. It’s all too easy to tell your friends and family about new ventures or ideas, but you might like to think about the type of advice you get. This

is why it’s important to actively seek out success by identifying some key people whose achievements, lifestyle and approach you admire, and of course, who can help you progress in your line of work by giving objective advice and criticism. So how do you build such strong relationships with people who will aid your success?

ESTABLISH WHO, WHAT, WHEN AND WHERE Just like you need a financial plan for your business, you need a people plan too. To be a success you have to continuously surround yourself with a powerful team of people who have the same values as you and from whom you can learn. Not only do you need to determine how they can help you, but


also how you might be able to help them. If possible, try to meet face-toface, and regularly. It’s better to get a true feel for someone if you physically meet. If the people who inspire you are public figures, then read the books they have written and those they recommend; watch inspirational and motivational DVDs and go to carefully selected courses and seminars.

FIND OUT WHAT THEY RESPOND TO An important aspect to forging strong relationships is NeuroLinguistic Programming. Techniques such as pacing and leading enable you to effectively establish a rapport with someone.


Pacing is simply mirroring the verbal and non-verbal language of the person you are communicating with to strengthen the relationship. By identifying whether they are a visual, auditory or kinesthetic person, you can adapt your communication style to match theirs. Emulating someone’s physical actions or phrasing often makes them feel reassured that you understand them and can connect with them. The next step is leading. This is when you try and create influence and lead towards win-win outcomes.

HAVE AN ABUNDANCE MENTALITY When people feel there isn’t enough to go around, they play their cards very close to their chest in the mistaken belief that they’ll have the advantage. But when you help others get what they want, you’ll often find it

is reciprocated. Successful people, in the holistic sense, tend to be fundamentally positive, optimistic, giving and dedicated. This is not to say that you should be naive. Have your eyes open, but also be broad-minded and respect and value diversity.


negotiation tactics and treading over people to get where you want to be. You need to be ethical in your dealings, to know where to draw the line, and, most importantly, not to cross it. Don’t ask people to compromise their integrity by asking them to do things that fall into a ‘grey area’.

BE ETHICAL Legendary motivational speaker and international salesman Zig Ziglar famously said that, “When you choose to be pleasant and positive in the way you treat others, you have also chosen, in most cases, how you are going to be treated by others.” Building strong relationships and working with integrity is key to building any lasting and successful business. The fact is that people do business with people they like and trust. Remember, there’s a huge difference between having sharp

KEEP YOUR WORD If you say you’re going to be somewhere or you’re going to do something, be true to your word. If you have a valid reason for reneging, be honest about it. If you want to succeed in business, you must actively work to build good relationships, simply because ‘people buy people’. If you want more information on this topic, I highly recommend Dr Thomas J. Stanley’s The Millionaire Mind, which looks at how America’s financial elite have become so successful.




WEALTH Garrett B. Gunderson, the founder of Freedom FastTrack, says there is wealth and then there is quintessential wealth. Few business owners ever achieve quintessential wealth. But you can, and you should.


ealth can be impartially measured. How much do you earn annually? How much money have you set aside in investments or savings accounts? How much larger are your total assets than the sum of your debts and other liabilities? Using these yardsticks, it is relatively simple to compare how you are faring financially to any other business owner. Many wealth professionals were raised to view money and wealth like a game of Monopoly, where the objective is to accumulate as much cash and as many assets as possible. The player who has the most at the end, wins. Note that the game’s instructions never offer an explanation as to why Monopoly money has value – other than to buy more properties and cushion yourself for those inevitable turns when you land on the highrent squares controlled by your challengers. Do Monopoly players enjoy their hotel stays? Are they there on their honeymoon, attending a class reunion, or are they on a dream vacation? Why did they board the Pennsylvania or Reading Railroads? Are they traveling to visit family or friends? Are they headed to a hobbyist convention or other special event? Outside the hermetic gaming

world, life is a balance of work and play, a truism that is too often overlooked by those ensnared in the pursuit of conventional wealth. Quintessential Wealth is also about net worth, but it extends beyond numbers and decimal places to elements that are not so readily quantifiable. These include: how richly you live your life – day in and day out; how passionately and consistently you


pursue your dreams; and how much better you leave the world because of the contributions you make to it. If you've spent your professional life setting wealth as a chief measurement of accomplishment – fretting over interest rates; postponing the pleasures of your heart's sincere desire; or letting your money sit passively in an investment or savings account waiting for it to magically


transform into abundance – then you haven’t come close to achieving Quintessential Wealth. Quintessential Wealth encompasses five foundational components:

IDENTIFYING YOUR SOUL PURPOSE There is an important distinction between the questions, “What’s my job?” and “What’s my purpose?” Going to work each day in order to pay the bills, fulfill your professional responsibilities, and save for retirement is an energy drain. In time, your job gradually diminishes your stamina and exhausts your affection for what you do. Heaven forbid you suffer a financial setback at some stage in your business or personal life. All that manufactured energy that you fueled into your business goes poof – months and years of labor and sacrifice, all for nothing. By contrast, pursuing your mission in life – your Soul Purpose – is a labor of love, to which you bring heartfelt passion, integrity, and unique strengths. It is invigorating. It generates enthusiasm and vitality. Often the nature of the work you do when pursuing your Soul Purpose may be nearly identical to the work you do when laboring at a job. The crucial difference is your perspective and outlook. Moreover, when you strive daily toward a clear objective – a higher calling – you’re far less likely to suffer a financial setback. That’s because your levels of energy and enthusiasm for your business grow steadily, opening your creative sluices and keeping you agile and better attuned to both the risks and opportunities along your path. And, should you nonetheless suffer a financial blow as you journey toward your Soul Purpose, the loss is strictly monetary. The dreams you set for yourself, the beliefs you hold dear, the experiences you’ve had, and the others you’ve helped are undiminished by any momentary financial reversal. What then is your Soul Purpose? We spend a great deal of time working with Freedom FastTrack members to help them discover the answer to this

important question. In short, it’s about who you are, not what you do. It is what you were meant to be in this life. It’s the career you pursue, not because you’re good at doing something, or because your parents or spouse encouraged you to do it, or because it’s what you’ve always done, but because it makes you feel fulfilled, important, aligned with your highest values. Living according to you Soul Purpose creates a legacy that long outlives your productive work life.


vacuumed into powerful sinkholes each year, never to be seen again. What causes the money leaks? Most commonly, the answers include overpaying on taxes, missing opportunities to restructure debt, making ill-advised investments, and failing to properly assign risk. Identifying where you are oozing money and taking all the necessary steps to stem the outflow is incumbent on everyone who seeks true mastery of their financial destiny.

KEEPING MONEY IN MOTION BEING AN EFFICIENT FINANCIAL STEWARD No matter how much you earn and save, you can never afford to be cavalier with your wealth. Prosperity is too central to facilitating your life’s Soul Purpose. Yet virtually every small business owner, usually unwittingly, permits many thousands of dollars to be

Do some business owners really graduate college dreaming of socking away funds for a few decades in a 401(k) or other retirement account, and hence drawing intense lifelong satisfaction merely by receiving and reviewing their monthly account statements? When money sits idly by for years or decades in so-called ‘accumulation’ accounts – mutual funds, bonds or


WEALTH & RICHES GARRETT B. GUNDERSON basic savings – it is not only the money that is stagnant; usually the depositor atrophies as well. Money should be put in motion. Instead of investing it in a 401(k), reinvest your profits back into the business that generated them in the first place – your practice. Or use your gains to buy yourself and your employees more training. Hire on more and better staff. Buy and grow another practice relying on your experience and proven expertise. Fund your Soul Purpose.

LIVING WEALTHY NOW Perhaps more noxious than any other type of procrastinators are those who hold off on enjoying their lives and incomes, awaiting some day in the far off future when they’ll feel sufficiently financially secure to begin enjoying the fruits of their labor. Reality seldom delivers on that distant promise. Why? If you live life with a ‘fear’ mentality – afraid you’ll run out of money before you run out of breaths – there doesn’t usually come a time in your 50s, 60s, 70s, or beyond that you relinquish that fear. Of course, it is prudent and essential to have a financial blueprint

for retirement and old age. Buying disability and long-term care insurance, along with life insurance, are just a few of the safety nets that I highly recommend. But regularly setting aside a fixed portion of your income now to spend on life’s many pleasures in the immediate future is absolutely essential to realizing your Soul Purpose and living a rewarding existence. We typically recommend placing at least 3% of your take home pay in a “Living Wealthy” account that is strictly to be used for enjoyment, whether that be fine dining, travel, luxury goods, collectibles – you name it. Wealth is meant to be savored. Not someday. Today!

BUILDING YOUR LEGACY Thinking beyond yourself and your years is a secret ingredient for making your ‘now’ a richer experience. Consistent with Soul Purpose, those who act on their ‘Last Will and Testament’ while they are still alive – by working on the family relations, businesses, foundations, collections, or charitable causes that will one day serve as their legacy – receive the pleasure of witnessing their own


bequests in action. Knowing that your life’s work will continue on and that you will leave this world a better place for having been an active contributor to it makes each day more meaningful, rewarding, and inspiring.

WINNING THE GAME What becomes of those heretofore lead-footed profit seekers who ease up on the gas long enough to contemplate how they’re earning, spending, and perpetuating their wealth? Do their revenue-generation machines grind to a halt? Do they lose their drive and sense of urgency? Hardly. Those who make the active choice to become Quintessentially Wealthy – not just ‘Monopoly Money Wealthy’ – often discover that their economic engines actually run more efficiently and productively than ever. In each case we’ve witnessed, business owners and others who genuinely embrace the pursuit of Quintessential Wealth, report back that their lives are dramatically more fulfilling, more abundant, and more treasured. They no longer merely roll the dice, pass ‘Go’ and collect $200; they relish the journey and the bounty of riches it brings.

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Our idea is to serve everybody, including people with little money.”


I am proof that you can you make money in Italy and be honest.”

Ingvar Kamprad grew up about as far from the fastpaced world of international business as one could. He spent his formative years on a farm in rural Sweden in the early 20th century. His enterprising mind worked feverishly from a young age. Kamprad began selling materials he could lay his hands on and count. From matches, to holiday decorations and fish, he found ways to provide basic products to local neighbours that were always in demand. A true entrepreneur, Kamprad turned an allowance into seed money to start his empire. During a brainstorm that took place at a dinner table, Kamprad founded IKEA. The letters for the famous company came from his own name, along with letters from the farming village where he was raised. Relying on his ability to sell things he could count and touch, Kamprad developed IKEA primarily into a furniture business, driven by frugal cost control and continuous product development. Today Kamprad has a net worth of more than $4 billion. He has grown IKEA from its humble beginnings into a multi-national corporation with stores in most major cities around the world, not to mention at least one piece of furniture in almost every home in the world. Yet, even though he has achieved huge successes throughout his life, Ingvar Kamprad still lives by his storied frugal nature. It’s what built him and what continues to sustain his empire.

He was given up as an infant, but that was the last time he would experience anything close to giving up again. Leonardo Del Vecchio was born to a poor single mother in Italy in 1935. His father passed away before Del Vecchio was born and his mother had no means to support him. Growing up in and around an orphanage and raised in part by nuns, Del Vecchio recognised in himself an early talent for metalworking. He continued to hone his skills and later turned his attention to crafting eyewear. When Del Vecchio reached the height of his skills in his 30s, he began to focus on business. He began selling spectacle frames for the Luxottica eyewear brand and quickly became successful enough to acquire Scarrone, a distribution company that would set him up to strike several key licensing deals with outfits such as Armani in the late 1980s. As his company was growing at a rapid pace in the late 20th century, Del Vecchio was convinced of the need for acquisition. The company bought several brands, among them Ray Ban and Oakley, arguably the world’s most recognisable designer eyewear brands. Today, Leonardo Del Vecchio’s net worth is almost $20 billion, reinforcing the fact that being left doesn’t mean being left out.












I will never give up. I never have, even when times have been terrible.”

To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.”

As a young woman, Michelle Mone was always told that she was beautiful. And like many young people, when the chance of a lifetime came calling, she jumped at it. Mone grew up in Scotland in the early 1970s. At the age of only 15, she left school to dive into a full-time modelling career. Determined to strive for more, Mone notched a job with beer brewer Labatt Brewing Company. She had faked some details on her resume in order to land the job, but clearly it was nothing she felt she couldn’t back up with her innate knowledge and professional prowess. Shortly after her time at Labatt ended, Mone became intrigued by a new women's brassiere design. After several years of subsequent development on the design, science and marketing aspects, Mone founded MJM International Ltd, from which she would launch the first Ultimo bra. The Ultimo brand launch proved to be so successful that Mone rapidly sold out of all of her initial supply. The Ultimo brand is now one of the most popular women’s apparel lines in the world, and Michelle Mone has proven that early trials don’t always lead to future tribulations. After becoming pregnant with her first child at 18, Mone seemed to be just another statistic in a high-risk profession. She would prove, however, that what one sees on the surface can often be deceiving.

Born in 1955 in the small town of McAlester, Oklahoma, Reba McEntire was already a prolific country artist by the time she was a teenager. She and her siblings learned to sing primarily from McEntire’s mother, and formed their own group, known as the Singing McEntires. The first music McEntire professionally released came when she was 21 years old. It failed to create much of a stir at the time, but her tenacious spirit quickly assured her long-term success. After a few short years honing her recording skills, McEntire cracked the top of the charts for the first time. What followed was one of the most stunning musical careers of all time, in the country genre or otherwise. While singing the American national anthem at a local rodeo, McEntire was spotted by a country music artist who would go on to help launch her career after a move to Nashville, Tennessee. Once there, she quickly impressed label executives and signed a contract with Mercury Records. In addition to more than 30 number one singles, dozens of albums released, and an induction into the Country Music Hall of Fame, McEntire also found the time to support an acting career. She starred in the hugely successful sitcom Reba, tackled several film roles, and even appeared on the stage. Reba McEntire has always found a way to diversify her talents, never slowing the drive that has pushed her to fame.






THE BEST YOU DIRECTORY The Best Professionals in Personal Development



Dr Stephen Simpson NLP, Hypnotherapy, and Havening Email: doc@drstephensimpson.com Website: www.drstephensimpson.com clients include leading names from the world of sport, business, and the entertainment industries.

Shayna Schulman Attitude adjuster and flexibility enhancer Email: Shayna.s@virgin.net Phone: +44 (0) 208 960 7715 Licensed trainer, coaching, consulting, yoga, nutrition

NLP TRAINERS Tina Taylor: Licensed Master Trainer and Practitioner Email: kay@the-me-group.com Phone: +44 (0) 7946 351640 Website: tina@tina-taylor.com Tina’s experience allows her to create and provide some very unique coaching services from stopping addictions to pregnancy and pain control.

Ulrika Shaw: Thrive consultant and hypnotherapist Email: enquiry@shawmind.co.uk Phone: +44 (0)7810 556029 Website: www.shawmind.co.uk Are you suffering from anxieties or depression? Maybe you’re struggling with bad habits such as overeating or smoking? I help people overcome anything that holds them back!

Geoff Rolls: Corporate Coach and Kinesiologist Email: geoff@geoffrolls.co.uk Phone: +44 (0)7905 056 513 Website: www.geoffrolls.co.uk Learning and development, NLP Trainer, TFH Kinesiology Instructor

June O’Driscoll: Exec Coach, Business Coach, Trainer Email: june@thoughtitude.co.uk Phone: +44 (0)7876 657 8055 Website: www.thoughtitude.co.uk NLP, Coaching and Hypnotherapy Training School and Consultancy

LIFE COACHES Dr Andrew A Parsons Mindfulness, Resilience and Finding Clear Purpose Email: aaparsons@reciprocalminds.com Phone: +44 (0)7854 029 268 Support people, build awareness and make changes for success

Dustin Vice Personal and Business Development Coaching Email: dustin@alliancecoachingsystem.com Website: www.alliancecoachingsystem.com Professional Coaching, Coaching Business system for professional coaches

Gail Cherry: Torchlight Coaching Email: gail@torchlightcoaching.co.uk Phone: +44 (0)1143 489 161 Website: www.torchlightcoaching.co.uk Helping people with their personal and professional development. We work together to be the best you.

Ruth Hepworth: Life Coach Email: ruth.hepworth@ntlworld.com Phone: +44 (0)1252 655 849

Those Life Consultant Guys: Coaching, Seminars. Business, goal setting and more. Website: www.thoselifeconsultantguys.com A coaching company who pride ourselves in helping you live your best life; every day, through one on one sessions and seminar programmes.

Nick Nanton Career and Life Coaching, Consultancy and Public Speaking Website: www.nicknanton.com Phone: (407) 215-7737 Recognised as one of the top thought-leaders in the business world

Edson Williams: Life Coaching Email: edson@leadbyexample.com Phone: +44(0)7867517777 Website: www.leadbyexample.com Specialising in leadership development and sport coaching

David Owen: Life Coach & NLP Trainer Email: bestyou@excel-yourself.com Phone: 07900 243494 Website: www.excel-yourself.com Stop smoking, slimming, phobias, relationships, stress, confidence, self-esteem.

THE BEST YOU DIRECTORY The Best Professionals in Personal Development

PHOBIA SPECIALISTS John Vincent Public speaking without fear Email: John@JohnVincent.tv Phone: +44 (0)7808 545 421 Website: www.johnvincent.tv

Paul Wright Phobias, Anxieties, Panic Attacks Email: paul@phobiagone.com Phone: +44 (0)203 086 8444 Website: www.phobiagone.com

NLP THERAPISTS / HYPNOTHERAPISTS Linda Cameron and Gail Walshe Inspire For Impact Email: say-hello@inspireforimpact.com Phone: +44 (0)845 601 7567 Website: www.inspireforimpact.com NLP Trainers, NLP Master Practitioners, NLP Life Coaches, Hypnotherapists

Debbie Williams Birmingham NLP Practice Group Website: www.debbiewilliams.co.uk Phone: +44 (0)121 241 0728 Life coaching, public speaking, sports coaching, all eating disorders, emotional mastery, OCD, stopping blushing, cocaine addiction, binge drinking.

Edson Williams Coaching, NLP, Personal Development Email: say-hello@inspireforimpact.com Phone: +44 (0) 7867517777 Website: www.leadbyexample.com With a holistic approach Edson is specialized in performance coaching

Laura Spicer: Public speaking skills and confidence Email: laura.spicer@gmail.com Phone: 01752 361 576 Website: www.laura-spicer.com The only accredited Sound Practice Trainer for the Society of NLP

EATING DISORDERS John Arroyo Coaching, Personal Development Email: john@johnarroyo.co.uk I have been a therapist and personal development trainer for 20 years, specialising in eating disorders for the last 10 years.



Pasquale Acampora (Italy) Master Trainer and Mental Coach, NLP, Team building Website: www.blackship.it Phone: +39 (0)335 70 99 000 Pasquale’s key areas are sport and business, he has worked with top athletes and multinational companies.

Alessandro Mora (Italy) Sport Coaching Email: a.mora@ekis.it Phone: +39 (0)522 337 611 Website: www.pnlekis.com NLP, coaching and team building applied to sport and business all over Italy

Xavier Pirla (Spain): NLP Master Trainer and NLP Coach Email: kay@the-me-group.com Phone: 91 002 84 44 (Madrid) 93 193 6449 (Barcelona) Website: www.the-me-group.com NLP, NLP Business Applications, Coaching workshops and Consultancy

Aleksander Sinigoj (Slovenia) Mastermind Academy Email: info@itnlp.com Website: www.aleksandersinigoj.com Leadership, Motivation, Sales, Business NLP

If you’d like to be featured on this list, please contact us on 0203 011 0866 or email advertising@thebestyou.co Visit www.thebestyoudirectory.co for more personal development professionals.





The pace of change can sometimes bewilder, but it can also give amazing opportunities to meet new people, discover new things and thrive. Bring out the best in you by discovering the latest innovations that will put you ahead of the pack.

Life Without Limits



Looks like online dating is the way of the future. But does this means the decline of good old-fashioned romance?


Associate Editor Bryan Szabo looks at some gadgets that will bring your home into the 21st century



LOVE IS IN THE WEB Less than a decade ago, the concept of meeting someone online had a stigma attached to it. Now it is pretty much commonplace, and with the existence of apps like Tinder and OkCupid, it seems to be something all the cool kids are doing.

According to a study led by John T. Cacioppo from the University of Chicago’s Department of Psychology, a third of newly married couples met online. A separate study conducted by eHarmony suggests that this figure will rise to 70 per cent in the next 40 years. Online dating is becoming more and more acceptable in the developed world, and even some developing countries such as South Africa and India have seen a huge increase in the popularity of online dating in the last few years. Generations X and Y have taken to this new phenomenon like lonely ducks

to water, but what does this mean for the diminishing art of traditional dating? “When you’re living in a big city, like London”, says James, a 32-year-old Londoner, “it’s difficult to meet people organically. Generally the only people you meet are friends of friends and colleagues. Dating these people can be a risk because if it doesn’t work out, you will still have to see them at social gatherings of your mutual friends or around the office. Alternatively, you could meet people at clubs or bars, but that just feels tacky. Online dating negates all of that and allows you to meet people who are in


Online dating negates all of the trickiness that comes with dating colleagues and friends and allows you to meet people who have similar interests

your age range, have similar interests, and if things go belly up, the chances of seeing them again are slim to none.” James is just one of millions of people who have found dating refuge on the web. “It’s also a lot less work”, he adds. “All you have to do is scroll through your matches and message the ones who look interesting. If that turns into a date, great. If not, just keep scrolling.” And you have the added bonus of being able to do all this while re-watching Breaking Bad for the fourth time. Match.com launched in 1995 as one of the first major

THE BEST YOU dating site. Many others soon followed suit, such as eHarmony, Chemistry.com and JDate. In order to join any of these sites, you had to subscribe, and that cost money. In 2004 OkCupid came along and broke the mould with a free online dating service, which meant that it became more available to the younger, less affluent generation. And for extra appeal to the younger more alternative demographic, OkCupid made non-monogamy and looking for casual sex both options when setting up your profile. Since then, it has become the poster site for alternative dating, attracting many people from the polyamorous and kink scene, as well as those looking for good old-fashioned loving. In 2012, InterActiveCorp launched an app that almost immediately changed the face of casual dating for people in their 20s and 30s. Tinder is incredibly simple when compared to its older counterparts; it only requires your picture, gender, age and location, as opposed to a detailed profile. Because of this, it has become an infamous ‘hook-up’ app rather than a dating site. “I tried Tinder out for a while”, says Linda, a 28-yearold London resident. “All my friends were on it, and I had recently broken up with my boyfriend, so I thought I would give it a try. But judging whether or not I wanted to go on a date with someone based purely on his photos felt a bit wrong. Yes, you will chat to them a bit before actually meeting them, but I like to know a bit about a person before deciding to initiate a conversation. That’s what makes online dating better than traditional dating. Otherwise you may as well go pick guys up in a bar.” Dorothy, a 67-year-old

Canadian, doesn’t approve of online dating at all. “My daughter recommended that I start online dating. Apparently there are sites that are for the older crowd, but the whole thing makes me very uncomfortable. I mean, a man’s whole profile could be fake! He could be a con artist or something. Also, I don’t like that everyone who looks at your profile knows why you are there. If you go to a party or bar, you could be there looking for a date, but it’s not advertised to the same extent. If no one appeals to me at a party, I can just pretend I am there with my friends and not looking for anything more.” With online dating still on the upswing, traditional dating may become a thing of the past. “People really romanticise meeting in the real world”, says Jamie, an avid OkCupid fan from Albany, NY. “Sure, their


I have heard so many stories about couples who are all hunky dory while they are dating, then as soon as they get married, the husband starts getting abusive or whatever. Meeting online doesn’t change human nature – it’s just a different means to an end

profile could be fake or whatever, but people lie in the real world too. I have heard so many stories about couples who are all hunky dory while they are dating, then as soon as they get married, the husband starts getting abusive or whatever. That can happen in the real world just as much as it can happen online. Meeting online doesn’t change human nature – it’s just a different means to an end.” Since the inception of the Internet, we have been gradually moving everything online. People don’t walk around from company to company with a stack of photocopied CVs anymore. And, with the advent of music streaming, when was the last time you bought an album? Online dating is no different, which explains its growing popularity and acceptance. As Jamie says, it’s just a different means to an end. b





With the fallen leaves bagged and on the curb and that cool bite in the early morning air, November is upon us. It’s the month that hibernation starts to sound more and more appealing. The smart home represents an attempt to make the long hibernation not only bearable, but even delightful. Bryan Szabo looks at a few of our favourite items to smarten up your abode GE MICRO KITCHEN GE has come up with a novel way to fit all the refinements of a luxury kitchen suite into a single monoblock. Open the cabinets beneath the sink and you’ll find a dishwasher. Next to that, you’ll find fridge and freezer drawers. The final column contains an oven and an Advantium microwave, both of which dramatically reduce conventional cooking times. The six-foot long module also features an induction cooktop that heats almost instantaneously whatever is placed on it, freeing the user from the four-burner convention that has been with us for so long. The hefty price tag means this isn’t for everybody, but if space-saving in your kitchen is a must, this is as good as it gets. Expected Retail Price: £9,300

SAMSUNG M3 WIRELESS MULTI-ROOM SPEAKERS Multi-room audio has been a feature in plenty of topshelf smart homes, but wiring every room in the house for sound (especially when that sound emerges from a single source) has required a fair amount of spadework for consumers – most of whom hire an electrician to run wires behind walls or as inconspicuously as possible. Samsung has introduced a line of high-quality wireless speakers that remove this burdensome requirement. You can stream music from your device, from internet radio stations or streaming services, or, best of all, you can run it from your hi-fi system, which means that even vinyl lovers can enjoy their favourite records in whatever room they happen to be in. Retail Price: £159




CANARY Merely place the simple-to-use and highly intuitive Canary on any surface in the centre of your home, plug it in, and sync it with your mobile – the device does the rest. It monitors your home when you can’t be there, or (if the user reviews are any indication) it can be used as a nursery monitor. The sleek device contains a bevy of sensors ranging from an HD camera equipped with night vision to motion detectors and ultrasensitive microphones. The Canary learns the rhythms of your home and sends alerts to your mobile device any time it registers anything out of the ordinary. The device proved so attractive that it sold out almost immediately upon its release. Don’t worry. The manufacturers have promised a second round for hungry consumers very soon. Retail Price: £159


ANOVA SOUS VIDE IMMERSION CIRCULATOR Sous vide cooking is rapidly becoming the cooking method of choice for those with exacting palates. The process is relatively simple: seal the food in a durable and airtight plastic bag and immerse the bag in boiling water. The flavourful juices that are normally lost during the cooking process are sealed in, and the end product is succulent and evenly cooked. Anova’s Immersion Circulator makes this technology easy to use, even for inexperienced chefs. A word to the wise: sous vide cooking is not convenience based; it is a slow process, but the results are definitely worthwhile. Retail Price: £129

If you’re still hiding a spare key under the planter or the welcome mat, it might be time to look at a more intelligent solution. The August Smart Lock syncs your deadbolt with however many mobile devices you wish. If you can’t be there to let in a tradesman or an out-of-town visitor, you can grant them permission (removable at any time) to enter your apartment. The mobile app alerts you when they arrive and when they leave. Adding or removing new keys is a cinch, and you’ll never be stuck trying to get a key back from an acquaintance or roommate who is no longer welcome. Best of all, no fumbling with keys in the dark; the device senses your approach and unlocks your door automatically. Expected Retail Price: £159

SENSE BY HELLO This attractive bedside device is designed to help you first understand both your sleep cycle and the environment in which you sleep and make the necessary adjustments to ensure that you’re getting the best rest possible. The device monitors how many times you move during the night as well as ambient noise, light, and even particulates in the air – all of which might be keeping you from getting the deep uninterrupted sleep you need. Each morning, the device sends a unique sleep score to your device and allows you to see what was happening in the room each time your sleep was disturbed. The Sense is scheduled to begin shipping in December. Expected Retail Price: £79


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The Best You November 2014  

Welcome to another great issue of The Best You. Packed with great content, featured interviews and articles to help you become the best you...

The Best You November 2014  

Welcome to another great issue of The Best You. Packed with great content, featured interviews and articles to help you become the best you...