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VOL.37, NO.6
Someone to watch over you PHOTO COURTESY OF PRESENT FOR YOU
By Margaret Foster When Donna Marie’s father was suddenly hospitalized, she visited him, prayed with him, hugged him and said she’d talk to him in the morning. But he died hours later, alone in a sterile hospital room. “During a long period of grief, I experienced a lot of guilt because I left my dad alone in the hospital,” said Marie, a resident of Alexandria, Virginia. “He kept asking me to stay, and I left anyway.” Marie’s grief led her to a new career. Today she works as a “death doula,” a nonmedical companion who supports families before, during and after the death of a loved one. Thousands of end-of-life doulas exist in the United States. “We are there as a nonmedical support to provide comfort in any way that’s needed,” explained Marie, who works at Present for You, based in Fairfax, Virginia. Marie’s supervisor, Jane Euler, lead doula and founder of that group practice, had similar regrets after she lost her mother 12 years ago. Euler was alone with her mother in a nursing home and didn’t take advantage of what little time she had left with her. “A few years later, I read an article on death doulas and had an a-ha moment: I should have had someone like that with me. I would have done things differently.” So seven years ago, after Euler retired from a 32-year career in IT, she signed up for a certification course. In 2021, she founded Present for You, which has six doulas on staff, including Marie. “I’ve seen such resilience, such beauty, such strength, such love, that it makes you appreciate each average day,” Euler said. “It sounds very cliché, but are we present in the moment? Oftentimes we’re not.”
JUNE 2025
I N S I D E … A Better Life at the End of Life
Preparing yourself and your loved ones for a “good death” Featuring: • A guide to hospice • Sharing your life story • Getting your affairs in order • How to say goodbye and more ...
This special pull-out section is sponsored by
Hospice is about a Better Life, not just the End of Life.
SEE SPECIAL INSERT on End of Life and Hospice following page 20
LEISURE & TRAVEL
Jane Euler is an end-of-life companion who founded a Virginia-based group practice four years ago to help the dying and their families. Euler and her fellow “death doulas” support people so their last hours are “not tragic, but beautiful,” she said.
Meeting a need
“There have been birth attendants and death attendants since the dawn of human need,” said Sam Stebbins, a retired physician who is a death doula in Euler’s practice. Just as some mothers-to-be make a “birth plan,” you can make a “vigil plan”
for your final days. Doulas can help create and facilitate that plan, choosing the right music, poems to read aloud, or religious rituals. End-of-life doulas fill the gap between medical care and hospice care. “We’re an See END-OF-LIFE DOULAS, page 34
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An adventure on lush, laid-back Maui; plus, revel in New York City’s classics while making time for the unexpected page 26 FITNESS & HEALTH k Summer superfoods k Natural mood boosters
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LIVING BOLDLY k Newsletter discontinued due to DC budget cuts LAW & MONEY k Try a CD ladder
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