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y o u r. i n d y @ g m a i l . c o m editor-in-chief:

Ró i sí n McCarty layout editor:

To m D au er

writers: Brittany Bollenbach Alexa Dillenbeck David Grimaldi Laura Meltzer Noelle Moore Josh Myer s Alyce Pelleg rino Madame Quer y Ste phanie Spencer print manager: Tony Pontius cover photo by: Tyler Dawson copy editor: Rachel Margolin artwork by: Madeleine Bergman Nicolas Sienty web design by: Danielle Lempp

The Purchase Independent is a nonprofit news magazine, paid for by the Mandatory Student Activity fee. We welcome and encourage submissions from readers. The Indy is a forum for campus issues and events, to give students the voice they deserve. Letters, articles, comics, ads, event photography and event listings are welcomed. The deadline for submissions is every Friday before midnight, and accepted pieces will be published the following Thursday. Publication of submissions is not guaranteed, but subject to the discretion of the editors. No anonymous submissions will be considered, but we will accept use of pseudonyms on a caseby-case basis. Send all submissions and inquiries to Send questions to Madame Query at formspring. me/madamequery. Back page quotes can be submitted to indybackpage or put in the Back Page Box that hangs on the office door. Our office is located on the first floor of Campus Center North, room 1011. Staff meetings are held in the office every Monday night at 9:30; anyone is welcome.


LETTER FROM THE EDITOR Self care is important! Especially as midterm season begins, don’t forget to take care of yourself. Make a list of things that make you feel great, and try to do at least three of them a day. Wear red lipstick! Trim your beard! Do both at the same time! Do that simple thing that makes you feel hot as fuck, whether it be brushing your teeth, wearing a furry hat, or wearing small underwear. Find what’s negative in your life and get rid of it, whether it be a person, or an obligation. If you can’t cut it out completely, find a way to make it more bearable, or even enjoyable. Masturbate! Watch porn! Organize your computer! Have sex! Kiss your best friend on the mouth! Hold hands with someone! Talk to strangers on Omegle about your favorite movie! Have a cigarette! Watch reruns of your favorite episodes of your favorite TV shows and say the lines along with the actors! Laugh before the jokes are even made! Read a book! Take care of your obligations, but don’t forget to take care of yourself in the process!

y o u r. i n d y @ g m a i l . c o m




BY Róisín McCarty

BY brittany bollenbach

I am very tolerant and respectful of everyone’s opinions, and I urge people to form their own and voice them when necessary, but I have to draw the line somewhere. Claiming that a publication,or anything for that matter, is worse than being raped completely erases the experiences of every single person who has ever been sexually assaulted. One in four women has been sexually assaulted, and one out of every ten rape victims is male. Making light of rape and sexual assault essentially validates the act to any rapists that hear it. Claiming that a newsmagazine that prints once a week is worse than all of the assaults that happen on this campus is offensive, callous, and frankly, ignorant. The Indy staff, myself included, have encouraged that the campus shares their opinions so we can better serve you, however claiming that we’re the worst doesn’t give us much guidance. That being said,.0 you are entitled to your opinion, and I will respect it, but I cannot respect someone who compares our publication to rape for the sake of hyperbole.

The Green Team has a lot of hands on workshops planned for this semester. If Thursday at 7 pm doesn’t work for you, and you’re interested in joining, let us know, we may be looking to change things up in the future. Join our Facebook group! (Search “Green Team”) You can also email any of us: Jonathan Oconnell, Brittany Bollenbach, Molly RoybalGoch, or Spencer Lynds. Upcoming workshops/events: March 1st - Bean-Sprouting Workshop! Learn to grow food in your apt/dorm - SUPER EASY! March 8th - Paper-making workshop! The following week (the 15th) will be designated to making NOTEBOOKS out of that paper & other found materials! March 22nd will be designated to water issues and plastic bottles (as well as making/distributing some guerilla artwork) and as a conclusion to our month, we will be screening “Blue Gold.” :


WE DIDN’T START THE FIRE BY NOellE moore Picture this: It’s your day off from class and you’re warm and snug in your bed, catching up on the hours of sleep your insane workload has deprived you of. Then suddenly, the violent blare of a siren cuts through your sweet dreams and you awaken to a strobe-light party in your room. For a moment, you don’t know what the hell is happening. Is there a tornado? A bomb? Have the Russians invaded? It doesn’t take long for the confusion to evolve like a Pokemon into a bigger, badder, angrier beast. Outback used Fire Drill! It’s not very effective. If you’re one of the residents of Outback like I am, you know all too well of the fire drills that plague our lives like some voodoo curse bent on depriving us of sleep, peace, quiet, and our sanity. The most recent fire drill occurred on a cold Wednesday morning at six o’fucking clock in the morning, two weeks after another fire drill –at around 8 AM on a Saturday. Now I’m not a fire-marshal, I’ve never claimed to be, but I’m pretty sure that the vast majority of these “drills” were just that: drills. I can recall one particular evening when the alarm went off for a legitimate reason. After being ushered outside and standing there for a near halfhour, we had the momentary excitement of seeing fire-trucks stampede into campus, but what lingered was the irritation and exasperation that one of our neighbors doesn’t know how to cor-


rectly make popcorn in a microwave. It has a button labeled “Popcorn” for Gosling’s sake. Now to some degree I understand the need for these drills – the school and state have a quota of fire-drills that they are required to have throughout the semester—but there is a line between necessary safety-precautions and infuriatingly excessive precautions. Outback has had at least seven over the course of this school year. I’ve observed the other dorms around the Quad having one, two, three max. Alyce Pellegrino, another resident of Outback shared my sentiments: “They wouldn’t really be that bad if the majority of them weren’t taking place before 8 AM. I understand they’re important, but this is college—I need all the sleep I can get.” It takes all of my self-control and that of my neighbors not to lash out, cuss at, and maim the poor RAs who are banging on our doors and directing us to evacuate. We know it isn’t their faults that this is happening, but when the sun isn’t even up and you’re being shoved out into twenty degree temperatures, many times before you’re able to get a coat or even shoes, for something that lasts a grand total of five minutes, it’s a given that you’re going to be pissed. Perhaps Purchase needs a reminder of how the fable of The Boy Who Cried Wolf ended. We can be The Dorm that Cried Fire because honestly I’m at the point where I’d rather take my chances with an inferno rather than drag my sleepy ass out of bed.

campus news

COMPOSTING ON CAMPUS BY ALEXA DILLENBECK Some students on the Purchase College campus prefer to live a sustainable life by recycling the bottles they get from the Hub and handouts from class that they don’t want. Some reuse jars or boxes while others turn off the lights for Purchase Energy Hour. Other students, mainly in the apartments, compost. According to Brittany Bollenbach, Office of Sustainability intern, said that it is easy to compost on campus as long as the student has a sealable container and the proper waste. Egg shells, non-glossy paper, raw fruit, coffee grinds, and fruit vegetable scraps are some of the things that can go into a compost container. After one week ,or when the bin gets full, it is a good idea to empty the waste into a compost pile. Many students find it a burden, because. they have to trek their compost waste to the Purchase Garden which can be inconvenient if one lives far away from the dance building, behind which where the garden is located. Behind Fort Awesome and Outback, student Jonathan O’Connell, co-president of The Green Team, built a compost pile himself so students will no longer have to travel so far if the distance is the reason they are not composting. Another reason is lack of support from roommates. It is a group effort in an apartment or dorm room for the composting to be successful. “I am the only one in my apartment who is really rallying for it,” said Harley Aussoleil, CoCoas coordinator, “I like doing it, but it’s a pain. I am usually the only one who brings the compost

to the garden and I can forget.” A way to gain support is to go to The Green Team, a club focused on creating “a community of conscious citizens and students dedicated to environmental actions at SUNY Purchase,” according to the group’s Facebook page, or the Purchase Garden. O’Connell has a similar situation. “My roommates always forget what gets recycled, what gets composted, and what gets thrown out,” he said. “I usually have to go through it all and sort it out.” While Aussoleil finds that to be a deterrent, O’Connell thinks it is too important not to do. He said it reduces one’s carbon footprint and creates really rich, nutritious soil if it is used for gardening. The Purchase Garden uses the composted soil, and their herbs can be found in the CoOp, which is another place on campus that has started composting. The Green Team supplied them with a container and now they can put their coffee and food wastes in the compost bin and a volunteer brings it to a compost pile. O’Connell’s tips for people who are new to composting are, “No meat, fish, oil, fats, or dairy. Any food that has been cooked with an oil should be thrown out.” “The Green Team is providing buckets for $2 if a student wants to start, but doesn’t have the container,” said Bollenbach.


dogs are a screenwriter’s best friend BY LAURA MELTZER Whether it’s Lassie saving Little Timmy from drowning in the family well or Sandy accompanying Annie when she most needed moral support it’s fair to say dogs are man (and woman’s) best friend. But, why dogs? Why do people always awe and swoon over cute dogs? Not only are dogs’ emotional creatures, but also they’re empathetic. Humans are filled with baggage and dogs love attention. So, put the two together and you get an everlasting friendship. Both sides get benefits. The dog gets a belly rub and free food, while the human gets the affection and someone who will always be there to listen. What better way to celebrate Uggie and “The Artist”’s Oscar win with compiling a top ten list of lovable movie dogs? 10.) Clifford from Clifford the Big Red Dog. Instead of paying for your child’s education at an Upper East Side private school why not have them gallivant with an overly sized dog who will teach them everyday life lessons? 9.) Uggie from The Artist. Nothing is cuter than a Jack Russell Terrier in a bowtie on the red carpet. 8.) Snowy from The Adventures of Tintin. As a journalist, Tintin was always putting himself in dangerous situations to get the news. But, if Tintin were to become a prisoner in a war zone, Snowy could gnaw away the jail cell bars to save his owner. 7.) Petie from The Little Rascals. Ms. Crabtree needed some time off from watching the Little Rascals and their parents were too busy strug-


gling to find work during the Great Depression. So, who will watch the kids? Why not a sweet little Pitbull with a red ring around its eye? 6.) Sandy from Annie. When you know the sun won’t come out tomorrow, it’s nice to have a faithful friend by your side. 5.) Toto from The Wizard of Oz. Let’s face it, the Tinman, Scarecrow and Lion never would have accompanied a whining girl unless she had a cute dog. I don’t care if they wanted a heart, brain or courage, a 2 hr. road trip with a complainer is always unbearable. 4.) Snoopy from Charlie Brown. Charlie Brown was depressed and constantly struggled with picking up social cues. If he didn’t have Snoopy as his wingman he would have never had the courage to talk to the Little Red Haired Girl. 3.) Lassie from Lassie. Little Timmy was always getting into trouble. Whether Timmy was wandering into a burning barn or swimming in a well, Lassie always saves him from his stupid mistakes. 2.) Old Yeller from Old Yeller. Not only can Old Yeller manage to steal steak from smokehouses to feed Airliss and Travis, but also has the decency to save Travis, who despised Yeller, from being stampeded by a pack of wild boars. 1.) Skip from My Dog Skip. Skip was so faithful. He waited till Willie came home from college to die. Now, that’s a “good boy.”


Nothing good happens after 2am BY JOSH MYERS It’s 2 in the morning, and you’re still awake. Maybe you’re locked in the library doing work, maybe you’re watching a movie, or maybe you’re doing certain recreational activities that make you hungry. Since you’re hungry, you decide to make the walk to the Hub to see what you can get at that time. What you forget is that the Hub isn’t open past 2. Personally, I hate that. I hate deciding that I’m hungry too late to get food from the Hub, or in the weird time in between the dining hall being open in the morning and then at 5, or after Starbucks is closed. I don’t ever really have food in my room and any time that I’m hungry I have to just try and distract myself with movies and eventually sleeping. I always think about all the foods that I would do almost anything for. (I say almost with some hesitation, but I would still do almost anything for food sometimes.) One of my favorite things on campus to eat is a sandwich from the Hub. Roast beef with mozzarella and cucumbers on a wrap. I’m salivating just thinking about it. I’m also slightly addicted to bacon rolls from Starbucks. It’s not something I like talking about, a la My Strange Addiction. Cindy Mack’s favorite late night snack from the hub is chicken fingers.“Always chicken fingers, because they’re delicious. All in all, I wish the Hub was rebuilt to be a two level duplex of awesome.” “Quesadillas and chicken fingers. I wish they had bagels all day, too.” added Emily Grigsby.

In my own humble opinion, if the Hub was open all night, it would be fantastic, at least in theory. Everyone knows that people who work overnight shifts are miserable. Except for Dawn and the other cashier with the flower hand tattoo, they’re flawless. I love them. The food would probably be subpar at best, and inedible at worst. And honestly, would you want to walk to the Hub at anytime past 2 in the morning? I don’t want to walk to the Hub half time time anyway, even if I’m in Social Sciences. Everyone has food that they would do anything for at 2 in the morning. If they say that they don’t, they’re either lying or they have no taste buds. Whether it’s something salty like a twenty piece McNuggets, or sweet like donuts from Dunkin’ Donuts, everyone has that one food that they want all the time, but more often when they can’t get it.


the sociology of waiting rooms BY STEphanie spencer I sat in my doctor’s waiting room for an hour and a half. I sat in the waiting room patiently, frequently checking my cellphone for any updates I may have on Facebook or through text. Honestly there were very few. Sporadically I saw patients emerge from the “Authorized Personal” door to my left. These were mostly middle-aged men, dressed in collared shirts and pants with a beer belly protruding every so slightly over their jeans. You’re normal, all-American middleaged man, with their wives trailing behind them. Now, when I say trailing behind them, I don’t mean in a subservient way. The imagine you have in your head shouldn’t be of a woman with her head bowed, being obedient. No, instead have an image of a woman taking charge, and following behind her husband as if protecting him. Every time these women emerged it was with a purpose, to make sure their husbands were taken care of. Many of the these wives held their husband’s insurance cards in their hands, giving it to the receptionist when paying for the co-pay, and this is not to say that the husbands were in any way “whipped” by their partners, simply that they trusted these women with taking care of the logistics. By the third time I saw this happening I was absolutely fascinated. It was pleasantly unexpected to see these women taking such a strong, active role in regards to their husband’s health. Not to say that this is something unanticipated, being that we live in a country where


women are expected to be “supermoms,” taking on the responsibility of mother, wife, friend, and so forth. The sociology behind what was witnessed in the waiting room is thought provoking. What exactly is the role women play in both marriages and relationships today? Yes, we have always been the nurturing caregivers, but it has clearly become something more. My mom has always said one thing about men, and she says this is in the most endearing way possible. Men at any age, my mom would say, are grown up boys. Ultimately men are raised and nurtured by women, and for the most part when they grow up they look for the same qualities in their partners. That iswhy statistically men tend to die sooner after their wives than the other way around. Women were the ones caring for the household. When understanding relationship dynamics between men and women and what they have developed into over time, women taking care of the wellbeing of men, even in a doctors office, isn’t so far-fetched.


culture shock announcements BY david grimaldi Culture Shock is already shaping up to be one of the better festivals that Purchase has had in years. Taking the wheel this year are Major Event Coordinators Andrew Sacher and Alicia Santiago, who are trying their best to bring together the most eclectic and extensive festival that they can. This year’s festival takes place April 27th and 28th, and as always, is free for all students. Full of performances, rides, and awesome food. So far, the MEC’s have announced two artists for the lineup: Grimes and Casey Veggies. Claire Boucher, who performs as Grimes, is a Montreal based electronic pop musician. She recently released her third album, Visions, on 4AD (Deerhunter, Bon Iver, St. Vincent) and has received overwhelmingly positive feedback. It’s simple: a girl singing with a high-pitched voice over extremely processed, yet simple, beats. It’s incredibly hard hitting and with a lot of effects and reverb. Right now we are living the epitome of a technological era, and almost everything is made by machines. This music is robotic, sensual, and is a very modern example of how to utilize electronics in producing music. Visions is a light and listenable album, and makes you wonder about the way the digital world is influencing you. Her live shows are energetic and this is sure to be a set you don’t want to miss. Casey Veggies isn’t even 20 yet. At a young age he started rapping and posting songs to his Myspace (RIP) page. He came up with Tyler the Creator and the Odd Future crew, and

disbanded from them as they started receiving a lot of buzz. His 2011 album Sleeping In Class shows that he doesn’t need to follow with that wave to make a name for himself. Culture Shock festivals have been known to sometimes only have one hip-hop artist perform, and it’s exciting that this year will have more than that, seeing as Mr. Veggies is not a headlining act. I am pleased to be able to announce a Culture Shock artist through this very article: Performing this year will be bounce musician Big Freedia, AKA, the Queen Diva. She is a transgender musician from New Orleans, a place where she is leading the game in her genre. She describes bounce music as “uptempo, bass heavy call and response music. It has a lot to do with ass shaking as well.” I think it’s impossible to not dance chaotically to her tracks such as “Azz Everywhere” and “Excuse”. She will be hosting an after party in the Stood, and this may be the highlight of the entire festival. She is known to bring a ton of dancers along to her shows and give bounce lessons to everybody before her performances. Y’all get back now.



Monday, March 12th The Stood at 5pm

March 14th-16th

The Stood Wednesday/Thursday: Food & Art at

6:30pm Friday: (just plays) Milk 6pm Poona 7pm


Thursday, March 8th

The Stood Cinema at 5pm

Wellness Center 3008 at 4:30pm

Shirley Durst and Durst Family Poetry Societyof America ChapbookFellows Anual Series Monday, March 12th

Humanities 2026A at 6pm

Monday, March 12th Student Services 0129 at 7pm

Pre-Focus on French Cinema Workshop

Wednesday, March 14th Administration 1001 at 6:15pm

Philosophy Society Presents: Richard J. Bernstein Lecture

DRESS FOR SUCCESS Wednesday, March 14th Student Services 1029 at 3pm

Wednesday, March 14th Southside at 12:30pm

Making Friends with your Mind C h ristop h er R obbin , A aron K rac h : and A + D Students

Thursday, March 8th

The Passage Gallery at 2pm

Aqua Zumba

Thursday, March 8th

Physical Education 1021

FEMINIST WRITER Lecture: Vivian Gornick

Thursday, March 8th Neuberger Museum 1011 at 4pm

Alice Unraveled Show

Thursday, March 8th Music Building 0078 at 10pm

PSGA SENATE MEETING Arts mgmt club meeting

Wednesday, March 14th The Stood at 6pm


Thursday, March 8th The Stood Cinema at 7pm

• terror pigeon dance revolt • CATS IN THE BASEMENT • CHESTPIECE/HOOKING UP


M O V I E N I G H T: Autism Spectrum Disorders Program

Thursday, March 8th CCS 1001 at 7pm

Friday, March 9th Student Services 1029 at 5pm

N E R D S H A B bat

Tuesday, March 6th The Stood at 8pm


Friday, March 9th Dance Building 0029 at 8pm ($3)

Thursdays Open Swim: Gym 1021 at 12-2pm Fencing Club: Gym 0003 at 2:15-4pm Gamers United: G-Street Lounge at 6pm AMG: Witsons at 6:30pm RPGA: Hub Basement at 8pm Green Team: Co-Op at 7pm PEMS: Southside at 8pm Trans*Action: LGBTQU at 10pm

Mondays FORTH meeting: Southside at 8pm The Indy: CCN 1011 at 9:30pm Brick Meeting: Red Room at 10pm

Tuesdays Anthropology: SPARC room at 8:00pm PUSH: Hub basement at 9pm Complexuality: Hub basement at 10pm GRIOT: Fort Awesome 0136 at 9pm

BFA Senior Project Dance Concert

Wednesdays B ible talk club ’ s : Make a Movie Night

Friday, March 9th

Fort Awesome 0126 at 6pm


Friday, March 9th The Stood at 8pm

Hillel: Hub basement at noon Purchase Comics United: Commuter Lounge at 2 Senate: Southside at 12:30pm Gamers United: G-Street Lounge at 7pm Chess Club: Commuters Lounge at 8pm Anime: Commuter lounge at 8pm Nerf: Humanites at 10 pm WPSR: WPSR Office at 10pm PTV: Hub Basement at10pm LGBTQU: Red Room at 10pm


have you heard? BY alyce pellegrino As most of the student body has heard by now, the Humanities building will be closed for reconstruction starting next year. Or perhaps you haven’t heard. The emails that were sent out to the students where brief and barely informative, mostly specifying that there would be fencing and protective scaffolding going up as a precautionary measure before official construction begins September 2012. Even further than that, the email simply stated that exterior bricks have come loose, and mentioned nothing about the heavy duty construction that would be coming. This email went out August 1, 2011. This means that the Humanities building is going to be inaccessible during the period of construction, a clear time period does not seem to have been given, which, of course, presents many problems to students, faculty, and organizations alike. With an entire building out of commission where will all of the classes that usually take place there go? Where will teachers and departments be moved? What will become of the marble bench that so many view as a landmark for the school? These are just some of the questions that have been raised by students who have learned what is to become of the building, and they are all valid points. Kirsten Lunstrum, a faculty member of the Creative Writing department who resides in the Humanities building, was kind enough to discuss the concerns and plans for the department that many students in the major have been voicing.

“The Creative Writing office is going to be moved to Campus Center South,” she says while packing up after the end of a workshop. “It will be one room that myself and the two other teachers [Monica Ferrell and Catherine Lewis] will share as an office.” This raises both a pro and a con. Pro: the department will not be broken up and scattered across campus, which was a worrying option for losing collegiality. Con: this is a condensed space now expected to effectively house three faculty member and their belongings. “This is the bigger concern, as Creative Writers we have a lot of books,” she says gesturing to the ones we have to read for class. “It will be nice to have the concentration in one place, but we’re now all being moved to smaller spaces, and we don’t know if they will be able to hold all of our belongings.” But it’s not just faculty who’s worried about losing their home ground. Apart from theatrical performances that take place at night, the Nerf Guild meets on Wednesday nights to take over Humanities in a shower of foam bullets. It is a fairly new group, at only two years active, that is now, essentially, homeless. “It was totally out of the blue,” says Ethan Roberts, president of the club. “But our advisor did inform us ahead of time that this would definitely happen.” The big question on the table now is where will these assassins go? “We’re really nervous,” he continues. continued on page 15


Created by Nicolas Sienty



Madame, I’m having sleeping issues. I

Dear Madame, I’m in love with this girl

was 30 minutes late to work today, 30

and she knows it too. She feels for me

minutes late to class yesterday, and I

but doesn’t feel quite the same. This

completely missed my 8:30 class the day

back and forth has been going on for

before that! I just can’t wake up! What

quite some time. Should I forget all of

can I do?

this and move forward?

Madame was never an expert on 8:30s. She recalls a time during her second semester of sophomore year when she took a Wednesday 8:30-12:10 class in the Fort. It was brutal. Sitting behind someone tall was necessary to snooze away. What was worse about it? It was a Shakespeare class. Eventually she was able to create a system that worked for her waking capabilities. It is only unfortunate that this came after that semester, because she ended with a “C” in the class. Here is what you do. Prioritize. Everyone needs eight hours of sleep. Sure this pretty much never happens. But you have to try your best. No matter how much sleep you end up with, set at least four alarms. Madame sets hers based on how much time she needs to get ready in the morning. Lets say you need an hour. So understandably you would set your alarm an hour before you have to step out the door, but actually this is wrong. Since you are like Madame and run a half hour behind on a lot of times, you should set the first alarm for an hour and a half before you step out the door. The proceeding alarms should be set in fifteen minute increments. It will be the most annoying system, but you will be so happy when you have time to dress well and have five minutes to spare for the start of your day.

No, you should not forget about her. Since she knows that you love her and doesn’t do a thing about it, she obviously loves you too. Why don’t you fawn over her some more, as she does nothing? Stop it, just forget her. It isn’t worth it and you probably make her feel slightly uncomfortable because she knows she doesn’t have the same feelings for you. She just doesn’t know how to say it without hurting you. Madame is being the harshest she can be so she can shake the cloudy bullshit out of your head. Life is too short to waste it on people who don’t care about us. The answer is yes, forget it all, and move on.





Dear Madame, I just recently broke up with

continued from page 12

my boyfriend of two years. My friends say

“This is our home and we’re getting evicted. We don’t know where we’re going to end up yet, and the future of the club depends on that.” However, much like the relocation of faculty and departments, some good may come from this shift yet. “The only good part is that we may get a building to ourselves. We tend to conflict with some of the shows in the Humanities theatre.” But where can this club find its new home? While some building’s layouts are perfect, others are dangerous. But, of course, the number of classes that will be moved daily seems to be one of the most pressing problems. The number of classrooms that are filled will likely begin invading other buildings, which, in turn, will evidently create a shift in the academic balance. Are we expected to share classrooms? Is there even room for all of us? To be fair, the building is in need of repairs. Just this past week is an example of that. Anyone, and most of us do, who have classes there will know that a large number of the bathrooms in the building were out of order. And most have noticed that the main second floor doors are not in the best shape of their lives. But this building is definitely not the worst off on campus. Wouldn’t it be more efficient to start working on a different building first?

that I should jump back into the dating game. But, I don’t know if I’m ready yet. How do I know when the time is right?

Two years is a long chunk of time. It might take you a while to get over your break up, but remember you broke up for a reason, whether it be that a break in your relationship was much needed, or that you were meant to find someone else. Whatever you do, do not keep your head in the mindset that you two will get back together. You will only drive yourself, and your friends, absolutely bonkers. You don’t even understand how pathetic you will sound when you say “I mean we’re just taking a break until the summer.” It’s pathetic because you are not on a break, you are broken up. Not together. I don’t want to rub it in your face like that, but it is the truth. Now whether you want to go out to the bars with your friends and slut it up is totally up to you. You can meet and pretend to be into as many people and still not like it. Madame will be real with you, the dating game sucks. It is hard to pluck out bad from the good. But remember, living in a bad relationship is a worse situation. I think your friends are right in that you should put yourself out there. Go out with your friends, don’t give yourself expectations. If someone comes around, they come around. You don’t need to just jump into a whole new relationship though. You just lived that life for two years. Do you really need to go back to it again with someone else? Not right away. Take some time to relearn what it is like to be on your own. You’ll probably find that its a lot more comfortable. Just because you’re now single doesn’t mean you have to watch the Notebook and shove Cheetos in your face. So go out with your friends, and if you’re in the mood to pick up dudes, that’s how you’ll know it is time.




*some quotes have been rewritten for legibility or to preserve the anonymity of the submitter

The Purchase Independent - 03/08/2012  

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