The Cascade September 7, 1994 Volume 2 Issue 1

Vol. 2 No.1

September 7, 1994

THE

Walking down the narrow hallways, surrounded by strangers.

Couples holding hands, friends laughing and talking without a glance at you.

Being lonely is like being alone in the dark witout a blanket to protect you from the monsters under the bed.

CASCADE

By Robyn Fentie

To Everyone,

It is two-thirty on a Saturday morning. It is a cold and rainy night. The roads are wet and slick. I am out on patrol whenI receivethe call about a motor vehicle accident on the highway that has occurred just outside of town.

I respond. The motor whines as I accelerate through the rain-slicked streets.

My thoughts race as I try to prepare myself for what I might find.

When I arrive at the scene, what I find is two twisted pieces of metal - the only thing that reveals their identity as cars are the tires. Glassanddebriscoverthe highway.

As I approach one of the vehicles, I find a young male laying in the front seat.

He is conscious; his injuries are slight. He is the lucky one.

As I approach the second vehicle, I find the remainsof a young child in the front seatbeside a female adult; the mother is still alive, but unconscious.

I run back to the police car an call for ambulancesand other officers to attend the scene. All I can do is to monitor the conditionsof the mother - and the driver of the other vehicle. I cover the child with a yellownylon blanket which I take from the trunk of the police car.

Withinminutes,otherpoliceofficers and the ambulances arrive. I assist as the paramedics work frantically to prepare the mother - and the other driver - for transport.

Soon, they are removed from the vehicles and are on their way to the hospital. The child remains in the vehicle until a coroner can attend the scene.

As I walk by the window of the 'other vehicle', I notice empty beer bottles on the front seat and the floor. I wonder why the driver of this vehicle - an intoxicated youngmale- is still alive, when an innocent, young girl is dead. ·As I sit in my police car, with the windshield wipers slapping away sheets of rain, tears of frustration run down my face.

... This summer I graduated from a twelve-step assertiveness program; in the interest of preserving my new-found mental health, I've decided to speak out. I've been quiet for too long, but now I'm ...

Pissed Off And l'tn Not Gonna Take It Anyinore!

By Anita Bradford That's one of the handy phrases I picked up in therapy. These are the topten things I will no longer take: 1. Generic-brand aspirin that dissolves on your tongue before you can swallow it, leaving your mouth feeling like an abandoned chemical weaponstesting site. Or any vitamin with over 100% of the Recommended Daily Amount of anything.

2. Any standardized test that requires me to fill in the little ovals with mediu~-weight lead pencil.

3. Your order. My Burger King days are far behind me, praise the Lord.

4. Messages from the drunk, sobbing ex-boyfriends 5. Any class with the word "methodology"

of ex-roommates.

in it's course description.

6. A number. I'm sick of waiting in line.

7. Any advertised "Trip Around the World" and 12 countries.

that involves less than 14 days

8.... a chance on me. Or any resurrected "ABBA" hit performed by sexually undetermined peace.

European popsters. Fellow students, dfsco is dead. Let it rot in

9. Any advice beginning with "this is none of my business, but..."

From Someone Who Has Been There.

Please - don't drink and drive!'

10. Time to smell the flowers. In the ValleyJ I'm still trying to breathe without inhaling.

learn how to

Bob Davies

UCFV Student Newspaper 7th September 1994 Vol. 2 No. 1 RoomE 242, Abby campus.

33844 King Rd. Abbotsford, BC V2S 4N2 854-4529 The views expressed in The Cascade are not necessarily those of the UCFV Faculty, Administration, students, Student Society, or anyone else's for that matter! They were just slipped underneath our office door.

WH.O? We, the Staff, are composed of dedicated, warpedindividualswhohave come together to produce this crazy publication.

Weare: Editor-in-Chief Bryan Sikora Managing Editor ' Monique Marchant Production Editor This Could Be You !

Sports Director Bryan Sikora Contributing Writers Monique Marchant Colleen Mah Michelle Demers Ron Dart Nolan Webb Jeff Tisdale Dallas J. Bob Davies Anita Bradford Robyn Fentie Clare Goldman Jeff Tisdale Melanie Glaim

Photographer Bryan Sikora

Religious Conference RoomB216 September 12, 1994 9am-12pm

And Now For Our Presentation

Bryan Sikora

Feature

Do. not blame us for anything,.for we are onlypawns in a m1,1ch larger game....

"THE PEOPLE HUNTER" starring Robert Dedeero

Front Cover

Guest Speakers: Joe Campbell and Joe Leichty from Northern Ireland.

Further discussion will follow lunch

Advertising Director

rn Cl)

"!> <d

Cl

A 'deer' night out at the movie theatre

A big Thank-you to Pumpkin, the Pig, for allowing herself to grace our cover.

Also, thank-you to the Watkiss family of Matsqui for the opportunity to meet Pumpkin!

UCFV Cascade Wednesday, September 7, 1994

Student Society~~~~~~ New Government Opens Their Doors

A3

Greetings from your all new and definitely improved UCFV Student Society Welcome to the 1994/95 edition UCFV. As you come to either campus this year you will notice one thing: change. Our one time "small school" is growing at an unprecedented rate.

Students are flocking to UCFV from all over the province. It is becoming to be more common place to find yourself in a classroom with someone from Kelowna on your left and Prince George on your right.

However, change is not limited to physical structure. Intangibles like student life is changing, too.

The events that are scheduled to unfold this year will be of such great importance that they will not only influence you and your tenure here, it will also have repercussions on your younger brother or sister, and even your children.

For this reason, we hope that. you will carefully read each copy of the Cascade, and pay close attention for notices by and about your student government.

In its pages you can expect to find news from us as well as any feedback/ comments from you. We encourage you to fill the pages with your comments/ complaints and questions that you may have.

New this year, both campus councils will be posting office hours for students at Chilliwack and Abbotsford, and by appointment if necessary.

In Chilliwack, the office hours will be posted either outside the Council Office/ portable behind the cafeteria, or in Student Activities.

In Abbotsford, the hours are listed on our office door (E 244) and at Student Services.

Also check the Cascade for information regarding the Student Society.

If you have participated on student council at your high school, or would like to see what it is all about, please feel free to attend one of our meetings or drop in during our office hours.

The only qualification you musthave is the desire to meet new people and help improve student life as a whole. Let us not waste the work that has been done for us, and try to make the struggle easier for those who come after us.

Sincerely, Jeff Tisdale, East Council Chair Melanie Glahn, West Council Chair

Summer Summary: We've come a long way, baby!

I'm not sure if it's possible to summarize what's been happening over the last four months. I guess the best way is to begin with the biggies.

The 1994 Leadership' Conference: what a weekend! We worked our butts off, but it was well worth it. We came out of the Conference with all of our strategic planning done for 1994/95. Our Society completed the first draft of our new Constitution since 1987! We also discussed our roles, worked out bugs, and did an awful lot of bonding.

As for representation, we all did our best to attend a majority of the various board meetings over the holidays. We've made

Remaining in touch is the West Council Chair, Melanie Glahn. A goal of the UCFV Student Society is to keep communications open between themselves and students.

our office into a "Student's" society office by adding the open office hours, message boards, bulletin boards, and information posters.

We've put together an "impressive" (if I do say so myself) booth in the Great Hall for you to get a more detailed insight into what we've done and what we're doing.

If you'd like to know more, please call us at 854-4529! We look forward to hearing from you!

Photo by Bryan Sikora

r------------------~------,

hstant Poweu& Glorq Notice of Elections and Call for Nominations

Melanie Glaim West Council Chair

Nominations are being sought for a term of one year to the following positions on the UCFV Board's Committee of the Whole:

'

I

one faculty member, to be elected by the faculty

West Campus Council Office Hours

one support staff member, to be elected by support staff members two students, one from the eastern region (Chilliwack campus and the Agassiz and Hope regional offices) and one from the western region (Abbotsford campus and the Mission regional office) to be elected by the students from each region

Since one of our main goals of the year is to be more accessible, we have decided to offer open office hours in our room (E244 ). If these hours do not suit your needs, appointments can be made at other times.

This is not the only way to communicate with us. Feel free to give us a call at 854-4529, or leave a message on our white board outside our office. We are here for you!

The only way we can represent you is if we know what you want. The only way we will know what you want is if we communicate. We hope to hear from you soon, and.often!

Nominations are being sought for a term of one year to the following positions on the University College Council: one student enrolled in Arts programs one student enrolled in Math, Science or Technology programs

Mondays: 10:00am - 2:00pm Tuesdays: 11:30am - 1:00pm, 2:00pm - 3:00pm Wednesdays: 2:00pm - 3:00pm Thursdays: 10:00am - 11:00am, 11:30am - 2:00pm, 2:30pm - 3:30pm

one student enrolled in Career programs one student enrolled in ABE or ESL programs

A copy of the conduct of elections which includes definitions, terms of office, election procedures, appeal procedures and a list of the positions to be elected is available for viewing at the UCFV libraries, switchboards, Admissions and Records Office, and from faculty assistants.

NEEDED: Willing & Unwilling Students to fill positions on the UCFV Student Society and the Cascade.

Drop by rooms E244 or E242 or call us at 854-4529.

Do it now!

Nominations forms are available from Admissions and Records offices.

L

Nominations must be received at the Admissions and Records Offices in Abbotsford or Chilli wack before 4:00 p.m. Friday, 16 September, 1994.

.J

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A4

UCFV Cascade Wednesday, September 7, 1994

Student Society

Conference Gives Method To Madness Members of the UCFV Student Society discuss Constitution, Mission Statement

UCFV faculty member Terry. Anderson graciously donated his experience and knowledge to help kickstart the 1994-95 Student Society., Along with Doug King he directed the Leadership Conference at Whistler, B.C.

Pizza: Friday, Sept. 9 in the Great Hall. YES!!!

The Student Society Leadership Conference proved to be an invaluable opportunityforthemembersoftheEastand West Councils who attended. Located at the Westbrook Hotel in Whistler Village, the Conference ran from Friday, July 15 to Sunday, July 19.

From the onset, this conference succeeded in fulfilling it's mandate and expectations. At it's most basic level, it provided the Student Society an uninterrupted occasion to work on interpersonal relations in preparation for the upcoming academic year of meetings, events, and close quarters.

Members of the Student Society, with the encouragement of Terry Anderson and Doug King, instructors in UCFV Criminology department, developed a series of objectives to be fulfilled for their 1994/ 95 term culminating in a MissiQn Statement and Strategic Plan to guide them to the

completion of these objectives. As well, a problem solving strategy was put into place to deal with any problem that may arise sometime in the future.

Constitutional talks also had their place at this conference, with Sunday's agenda being almost entirely devoted to the creation and ratification of a new Constitution and by-laws for the UCFV Student Society to govern under. Absent since 1987, thisnewconstitutioniscurrently being finalized before being put to the students in the fall.

Ultimately, the success of this leadership conference will be felt in the year to come as the strategies learned and the objectives plaimed begin to materialize.

What this conference acµieved for the incoming Student Society was a worlting plan to be initiated well before the September start date for school which, to date, is on track and proceeding as scheduled.

1994/95 UCFV

Student Society

Who''s Who A quick run-down of the chosen ones: WestCampus Melanie Glaim, Chair.

Michelle Demers, Secretary Bob Campbell, Public Info.

Bal Sekhon, Clare Goldman, Members at Large

East Campus Jeff Tisdale,-Chair Dennis Halligan, Public Info.

Ula Vicktor, Social Coordinator

Being a student can be tough, but it does have its advantages, like the no-fee Scotia Banking Advantage® Plan.

It gives you a daily interest chequing account, a ScotiaCard 1 " banking card and a Classic VISN card*.

We also offer low-interest Scotia Student Loa-ns*.

Sign up for the Scotia Banking Advantage Plan before November 10th, 1994 and you'll automatically get a chance to win an IBM ThinkPad PS/Note 425 notebook computer.

Just drop into any Scotiabank branch for full details or call 1-800-9-SCOTIA.

Scot .1abank Save banking machine charges by using your ScotiaCard at the Abbotsford Campus outside the bookstore.

t The 10 Registered

tr

~

banking card at the Cashstop® machine located

Bank of Nova Scotia licensed user of l\1ark. * Subject to credit approval.

Trade Mark of The Bank of Nova Scotia. HI Trade Mark of The Bank of Nova Scotia . . ..,, ,

There are 2 positions in the West Council, and 4 in the East Council which are currently vacant. If you are interested in filling them, please give us a call at 8544529, or drop by our Offices on either campus.

Welcome~~=======~

S. S. Is On Campus

Words From Above Dear fellow-students, It is a pleasure to welcome you back to campus for a new academic year.

For those of you for whom this is your first term with us, I hope that you will quickly settle in and make good use of the many services UCFV offers. We will do our very bestto ensure that you are successful during your time with us. Especially make use of our faculty, each of whom will go to great lengths to help you with your learning.

This year will see, for the first time in UCFV's history, students elected to the Board and in much larger numbers to the University College Council. I urge you to take the election process very seriously perhaps to consider allowing your name to stand for one of the positions, and certainly to vote in an informed way for the candidates you feel will best represent your interests.

Support your Student Association as it moves towards creating a more representative and active organisation.

Again, my very best wishes for an enjoyable and satisfying academic Yell!·I am looking forward to greeting as many of you as possible personally.

Peter Jones · President

CASCADE in its Second Year!

No Sophomore Jinx Here Forging forward into its second year, the UCFV Cascade will once again roll off the presses to the delight of the hordes.

From A to Z, the Cascade will be there with a story or opinion. Published every second week of the academic year, the Cascade says it all, whether you like it or not!

Originating in the Fall of 1993, the Cascade has seen a new Prime Minister get elected along with a new UCFV Student Society.

We watched the Cascades women's basketball and soccer teams go to the Nationals in their respective sports, while preparing for an earthquake.

On behalf of the student body, the Cascade would I il<.e to welcome the members of the 1994/95 edition of the UCFV Student Society to their positions.

It has been over four

Remember also that your education is not confined to the classroom. Join in the intellectual, recreational and cultural events that occur from time to time. Even better, volunteer to organise them.

Most of all, understand that it is not possible to be merely the passive recipient of an education. Leaming is an active process that includes not only considerable study and self-discipline, but also interaction between you and your instructors, and equally impoi:tant, between you and your fellow students. The quality of these conversations will largely determine the value of your educational experience at UCFV.

The 94/95 academic year promises to be a year full of variety, with dating games, hiking excursions, students participating on the UCFV Board of Directors, and an extremely active Student Society.

And in the midst of this controlled chaos, the Cascade will be there- observing, reporting, and, like every journalist worth their salt, swilling the brew.

Not unlike the lemming, the staff of the Cascade are asocial creature, and require others in their quest for survival. The cliff, or office, is in room E242, so drop in, if you have what it takes!

Not Necessarily the-News Now West-Old Man ... Seems that 73 year old Aldin Straight needed to get from Laurens, Iowa to Blue River, Wisconsin in a hurry to see his 80 year old brother who'd had a stroke. Seeing as his eyesight is so bad he can't drive a car over 20mph, he hopped onto his ride-on lawn mower and drove the 240 miles at a speedy 5 mph for six weeks. Only problem is he didn't phone ahead to tell them he was coming, big brother wasn't pleased until Aldin offered to mow the lawn.

months since the inauguration of the current Society.

Even though the hal I ways are empty through the summer months, activity could be found in the.Student Society off ice.

To date, members of your Student Society have a t t e n d e d a n i n t .en s i v e conference on leadership.

They developed many objectiveswhichwill be put into place in the upcoming year, as well as learning how to resolve conflicts both among themselves and others.

They are also rewriting the Constitution, a task. no one has dared tack.I e since 1987. At press time, a first draft is completed, and should be available by the time this paper hits the stands. Those interested in Constitutional affairs should grab a copy and I et the Student Society know what , .you th i nl<.about it.

- These have only'beerr some of the major events.

Along with pushing paper,

the Society has planned numerous events.

From barbecues to pizza days to parties, they have something organized for al I walks of life.

If you know of something that you would Ii l<.e see happen, I et the Society know!

Most importantly, the Society has arranged to have members and representatives present at the UCFV's Committee of the Whole and University Co 11ege Counc i I meetings, as well as the Board of Di rectors meeting, and many other important meetings.

The Student Society must al so remember that the people they represent haven't had much success in the past with previous Soci~ties.

It will tal<.e a lot of time and effort to re-gain the respect of their electorate.

Presently, they are on course to doing a great job.

Granted, there are st i 11 glitches in their system, and work to be done. But items are being filed into the DONE basket.

Most importantly, they have put the Studentback into StudentSociety;hopefully they can l<.eep it there.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• •• • • • •• •• •• • • • • • • • • • • • • • •• or any other 1 topping of your choice

"The telephone pole was approaching fast. I was attempting to swerve out of its path when it struck my front end."

"My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle."

"An i~visible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle and vanished."

.

• • • •• • • •• • •• •• ■ ■

•• •

•

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"I though my window was down, but found it was up when I put my hand through it."

"I was on my way to the doctors with rear~end trouble when my universal joint gave way, causing me to have an accident."

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"The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention."

"I pulled away fro the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment."

•• • • •• •

..

Excuses, Excuses ... gleaned from auto insurance claimants:

''A pedestrian hit me and went under my car."

AS

UCFV Cascade Wednesday, September 7, 1994

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•• •• • •

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.•.?..•,~. ~ -~ ~ :~ ?'~■...~_..'?}~. !'~~~ •· •:.~--~-'~ ~.:■.'

•;<~ ,;,~,•.■.,; .~'~ '~ ~-~,~ .~ ~ ~..-~;~,.. ;, ~-·~

A6

UCFV Cascade Wednesday, September 7, 1994

N e w s ~~~~

lf,::1P..,,

Free Stuff Is Cool

TRY

Get your Survival Guide Today!

Finnegan's Bistro Bar $2.49 Special

Music, religion, mathematics, sex, pigs, and checkers. You can find them all on the cover of the new 1994-95 UCFV is t u d e n t Society Survival Guide. Find them if you can.

INCLUDES 2 Farm Fresh Eggs, Hashbrowns, your choice of Bacon, Sausages or_Ham

Now

Open

7:30 a.m. -10:30 a.m.

By Monique Marchant

Monday - Friday

Hey! Welcome back everyone, or if it is your first semester here, I guess a simple welcome without the ''back" will have to do!

For those of you who are returning, I hope you enjoyed your break away from this institution, coming here in the summer only to register and give them your life savings (most of which you had to accumulate over the summer, probably).

I have absolutely no idea what any of you did for your summer, but if you want to know what I did with mine, grab a 19941995 Student Society Survival Guide.

My summer-time days involved putting it together, wondering ifl' d ever get it done on time, wishing that I hadn't decided to spend my entire summer working at the same place as where I go to school. I did finish it, obviously, and in my completely unbiased opinion, it's awesome.

I lied about spending all of my time at UCFV. I escaped fora few short camping trips, none of which I'll ever be able to forget. Things like crawling through caves on your stomach and almost getting stuck halfway through, and dropping all your stuff in a lake tend to stay in your memory.

But so does sleeping under the stars and hanging out with your best friends.

I could probably recite every fun thing that I did this summer. Unfortunately, my memory doesn't seem to operate at the same capacity once school begins and I have difficulty remembering what I have

See You Here!

POOL ·s

- ·rhurs.

1-

Midni(

CHESS CHECKERS UCFV Anniversary cam Tidbits of the Twenty Years

DARTS VIDEO GAMES

By Monique Marchant

-usGreat Food From TheFINNEGAN'S PubMenu

--·•··"•.s.'"-·'"•.'""' .. ___________

done, let alone what I have to do.

That's what the Survival Guide is for. Itistohelpyoukeeptrackofeverything from class times to assignment due dates to phone numbers to the ins and outs ofUCFV. I guess I should comment on the cover. The majority of the words came from my brain, others are from people who happened to wander into my office for one reason or another. They didn't get to leave until they gave me a word. Once they thought of one word they were hooked and often returned with others.

In the process of creating the cover, a game was developed. It's great for those boring- moments in class (not that I'm suggesting by any means that those exist, of course).

What you do is choose any one word and then try to make phrases or even sentences using the words that follow it. It is almost like going through a maze. If the sentence no longer makes sense, then you hit a dead-end. You can't jump around though. The words must be directly above, bellow, left, or right of each other.

All this in a handbook. What more can you ask for? Oh ya, I almost forgot. The one question on every economically challenged student's mind - how much?

It's FREE! Courtesy of the UCFV Student Society.

They're available from the Student Society offices, the Cascade office, Student Services, and Registration.

Get yours now because once they're gone, they're gone and you won't get one.

111111!1 ________________

__

In 1960 a dream first appeared in theminds of members of the Fraser Valley branch of the Alumni of the University of British Columbia. The dream was to create a junior college in Chilliwack.

On April 4, 1974 the Honorable Eileen Dailly, Minister of Education formally announced the go ahead for a new college. Septemberof that same year, Fraser

Valley College was opened. Because a campus did not exist at this time, classes took place in district schools, church basements, the Coqualeetza Education Centre, and in commercially-rented space.

Now here we are in the 1994-95 academic school year, celebrating the 20th anniversary of this institution· s existence as the University College of the Fraser Valley.

Watch up and coming editions of the Cascade for "Tidbits of the Twenty Years."

UCFV Cascade Wednesday, September 7, 1994

A7

Entertainment CRIM NEWS

THEATRE

15th Year "The land that time forgot" The demands of theatrical success

By Monique Marchant

How to hit front page without doing anything significant -------- Among those aforementioned information from those who have studied

By Clare Goldman

Well, it's back to the old grind.

With the beginning of the fall Summer is over and the days of life is a semester comes a new season of theatre. beach are back to life is a bitch.

This year marks the 15th anniversary of Seriously though, it's good to have theatre at UCFV. some purpose to my daily routine after four In the 1979/80 season the Theatre months of wandering aimlessly under sunny Department produced their first show skies (yeah, right, who am I trying to kid).

"CanadianGothic". Theydidn'thaveprops, I guess the requisite how I spent my summer lights, or even a theatre. is called for. Well, it's brief, I did nothing, Fifteen years later the UCFVTheatre absolutely nothing.

Department gets to start off its season by Yes, that's right I didn't work, I offering their students the ability to obtain a didn't turn o my alarm clock, except to Bachelor of Arts degree in theatre. As the wake me up from those afternoon naps, and department performs this years shows at the I didn't wear socks all summer. usual venues (the UCFV Studio Theatre on NO I'm not independently wealthy, the Chilliwack campus an the Chilliwack I just happen to be part of a partnership and Art Centre) they will be monitoring the a parent which means that this summer was construction of their new theatre on the the first and last one I will spend as a patio Chilliwack campus.

• I beach potato. Next summer I probably To cope with the increasing won't be so lucky I'm sure. popularity and success of the Theatre So, what does this have to do with Department, Richard Kirkley has been hired Crim News you may ask. Well, it allowed as a new full-time faculty member. Jody me a great deal of time to puruse the editorial Cameron is also now a full-time Theatre pages of our local newspapers.

Department staff member.

Alas, I was greatly saddened to have my worst fear confirmed - yes, I do live in Here is what's happening for the dark ages, that is the land of no the 1994/95 season: acceptance, the land that time forgot Abbotsford.

Sept. 7,8 Auditions "The Importance I would like to say I was surprised to of Being Ernest" read the vitriolic diatribes of many members Sept. 23 TheatreSports of our commu~ity on such issues as youth; Oct. 17, 19 Auditions "The Stone homosexuality, crime control, criminals and Angel" corrections, but I wasn't.

I Nov. 9-26 Show #1 "The Importance However, being the Pollyanna that I of Being Ernest" am, I excused their uneducated and biblically Nov. 28. 30 Auditions "A Midsummer referenced vituperations by chalking it up Night's Dream" to ignorance of the facts, supposing of course Jan 18-Feb. 4 Show#2 "The Stone Angel" that in a perfect world an education in the March 1-11 Show #3 "A Midsummer actualities of living in the 1990's would Night's Dream" change their biased views. I was, however, April 26-29 15th Anniversary Fund greatly pleased to see many educated and Raising Presentation & Gala intelligent responses from several members July Ashland '95 Tour - Oregon of our most excellent student body and, of Shakespeare Festivalcourse; faculty.

community members was my favourite political representative, Mr. Randy White.

Mr. White not only contributed greatly to the letter page but her also make the front page on several occasions with his ideas about why crime occurs and how to fix it, front and center. I must say his antics made me both laugh and cry but mostly shudder with fear at the thought of Reform ever managing to get themselves elected.

Why do I oppose so strongly?

Primarily because the Reform political platforms are knee-jerk responses to social and political issues that offerno effective or positive long-term solutions to these issues and are conjured solely to gamer votes. In other words, "tell them what the want to hear", a unique political concept.

Ah yes, pretty strong statements to start the year off with you may say. Well, over the next few issues I intend to educate and inform on the realities of crime, youth, crime control, punishment and corrections with accurate statistics and expert, educated,

and worlced in the field of criminal justice.

Mr. White, sharpen your pencil and start taking notes, the final exam is in four short months, no essay required, seminar participation mandatory.

P.S. Didlmentionl'mamemberof our new 94/95 Student Society? No? Okay.

I'm a member of the new 94/95 Student Society. My position is that ofMember-atlarge (no cracks about the thighs please) which means not only am l your roving crime reporter but also your roving Student Society member. I have office hours but you'll probably find me there at any hour, including the wee hours, so feel free to drop in and berate me about my column, offer support or suggestions (those that don't involve biological functions), or offer me money.

By the way, any and all help on Student Society is greatly welcome, after all it's your Student Society so get involved, we won't bite, drink you under the table maybe but we won't bite.

It's finally here.

A machine that will give money to students

Gregory was caught in the actoutsideof the Abby Bookstore.

Photo

by

Bryan Sikora

RANTS, RAVES, AND ASSORTED REVIEWS

"Who are you calling straight-laced?"

By Nolan Webb Welcome back to the institution that we call home.

With the new semester comes a new name for my column and a slightly different focus. Canadian music will still likely be my main topic, but I will also periodically include rambling, opinionated, biased and one-sided commentaries on irrelevant issues. With these commentaries I will hopefully anger the conservative masses that lay listless in their politically-correct splendor. I will always promote free speech without newspaper even if it is occasionally conveyed in amannerwhich is off-base, ignorant, offensive, expletive, suggestive or even mentally stimulating. Now lets see some of my fellow students get off of their complacent asses and write for our fine newspaper, and keep the Cascade from becoming just another straight-laced conservative rag of politically-correct stories. And now that I've gotten that off of my chest here's some of my thoughts on this past summers hot topics ...

The Vancouver Riot; I, for one, deeply enjoyed this event as it had all the elements of a good action movie: mass amounts of people, widespread panic, overall carnage, heavily armed police, oh and of course the tear gas. A definite highlight occurred while attempting to drive out of the city when we encountered a wall of riot police in front of us (all rhythmically tapping their batons on their rio~

shields) and a group of mailbox-wielding rioters behind us, all while playing Helmet/House of Pain's 'Just Another Victim'. Overall a very exciting and satisfying time. It was nice to see some familiar faces from the UCFV student body out showing our special school spirit. I just hope you guys didn't get caught on the police videos.

The World Cup; Some great action and some interesting events, including Diego (Drug Head) Maradonna's expulsion and the Columbian chaos. But to have the final game in a tournament that takes four years for eliminations settled by penalty kicks is absolutely ridiculous.

O.,T, Simpson's Trial and Surroundin1: Fiasco; Just another glorious opportunity to sit back an observe how completely fucked up the United States really is.

PentictonForestFire; Okay, I must admit I was intrigued by the Vancouver Sun headline, "Hundreds Flee Inferno of Penticton", and I figured after the Vancouver riot, how bad could it be? So a friend and I went to check it out, and although exciting, it just wasn't disastrous enough for my taste.

Lollapalooza; First of all it's fine and dandy that Vancouver is significant enough of a musical city to host a date on the tour, but its ashame about the rescheduling of the concert date. Because it was originally scheduled to be on July 1st, the third annual Canada Day concert (To myself and to thousands of others a much more significant event) was scrapped from the beginning. And then they go ahead

and change the Lollapalooza date to damn near Fall and we end up with jack squat on Canada Day. Secondly, for the third year in a row there was absulutely no Canadian representation on the tour. Not even one little billing on even the second stage on the Canadian leg of the tour.

Bloody ridiculous if you consider that there have been musicians booked for the tour from Belgium. When confronted about this, organizer Ted Gardner made the crack, "Loverboy's reformed, thear". Looks like we can look forward to continued American ignorance regarding Canadian music. So when you look back at your memories ofLollapalooza, you can give yourself a big pat on the back for helping bands like The Tragically Hip, I Mother Earth, Junkhouse and hundreds of others dig themselves into a deep pit of Canadian obscurity. · Commonwealth Games: If you were stupid enough to travel to Victoria or to turn on your t.v. on long enough to support the last traces of imperialistic British bullshit or to applaud Australia, Canada, and Britain continuously clobbering Guyana and the Ivory Coast (Now that's entertainment) then you are an absolute idiot!

So that's it for this issue, if you have any comments or complaints then write them down (if you are capable) and drop them off at the Cascade for my imm~iate enjoyment.

Keep reading the Cascade for future interviews with such Canadian bands as Moist, Rhymes With Orange, and Odds.

.

A Sporting Look

EAR TO THE GROUND

March of the Lollapalosers

By DalJas J. By the time you read this, sulllffier will be over ...

I refuse to dwell on this the same way I refuse to ask how your summer was.

I do not care how you are nor do I think that the passing of a season is anything to be mourned. Let us get down to business ...

I am willing to bet that you think that you are pretty cool. You probably have some appendage of your body pierced and some of you may even have (gasp!) a tattoo.

But the thing that you are probably most proud of is that ticket stub that proved that you went to Lollapalooza '94. Yes, you are truly a cool person who knows how to go against the grain and you have the ability to see the mainstream for what it is.

Well, guess what? YOU SUCK. It is pretty hard for me to say what I hate most about Lollapalooza: the fans, the bands, the bastardized concept, or he marketing. As I am writing this before this year's concert has taken place, I am unable to judge by performance, only memory.

Most of the people who are going to Lollapalooza now are people who have 'never heard these bands and ho really do not care. They have just heard that it is cool to go to an outdoor concert, do some drugs, and jump around on the heads of your friends. A few album sales n;;~'Jt mme about so that the Lollapalosers kn(.1W the words to the latest albums released by these bands but there will be no long term support for the artists as the lineup for next year will dictate to these fans what is now cool.

Speaking of bands, let us take a look atthis year's lineup. Hlllffim, Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds? No complaints from here,

different food. The band list was comprised of groups that could not tour as single units but by combining them, they were able to perform in places that had previously been out of reach. Now, all the bands that are performing can play most any venue and some have even been in Vancouver as recently as six months ago. Theonlyreason to organize this is for money.

Here is an unpleasant fact that. you probably do not want to tarnish the name of Lollapalooza but being that most people reading this.will go to the Surrey(?) location this year, it is worth mentioning. Did you know that Vancouver is considered a "warmup" venue for most tours? That is what has happened for the past couple of years for this show, but this year it has changed.

Yes, this year Vancouver is one of the last gigs. That means the same thing that it has every other year: Vancouver does not get all the cool exhibits and rides that the other dates do, and the artists consider the date as either a "sound check" or "warm · down." Great, huh? There is nothing like getting a second-rate show and paying full price. Check the stops on the concert shirts; we are lucky is they show up at all.

Here is my point: save your money and go see some bands that don not have the privilege of being included in an "alternative" marketing scheme. Go see cub or Econoline Crush or Art Bergnamm,just do not bother supporting a self-important, self-righteous tour that poses as an alternative source and haven. The. promoters make their money here the same way as any other concert. Remember, when something is advertised as "alternative", it is not.

Besides, I have to work that day.

Golfers Urgently Needed If you have a handicap of ten or less, we

want you! You must have three courses to be eligible to play.

For information contact Coach Elaigh Guidraat853-7441 local4374or Jane Anti! at 854-4583.

Basketball Tryouts Beginning Sept. 12 at the Clearbrook Colllffiunity Centre, 2825 Clearbrook Rd. Men and women taking at least three courses are eligible.

For information contact Mike McNeill at 852-8900 (mens), Sandy Chambers at 8200050 (womens), or Jane Anti! at 854-4583.

l\lEL'S OUTDOOR AUVENTlllU:S

Welcome Back! We have a great semester planned for you. Ourfirstmeeting is Tuesday, September 13 at 3 p.m. in the Abby Cafeteria. Or call me at 853-7441 local 4255.

Here's our schedule to date: Sept. 17 Golden Ears (various trails, free) Sept. 25 Canoeing Sept. 30 - Oct 2. Tofino Camping Trip

Life's Little Corner

One night when Omcer Paul Mitchell was out walking his beat in the rain. ••

UCn' C•cade iaalef 1 SepttmbH 7, 1994

other than the fact that nobody will be able to get into his performance as Gothic-style music rarely goes off well when played in the daytime. (The lighting and the smoke machines do not work as well when a gust of wind blows everything in the wrong direction; stick to clubs, not outdoor concerts).

How about L7? Gee, maybe there is a chance that they will repeat that tampon trick that happened at the Reading Festival!

No thanks.

Breeders? Obviously they planned it so that you could take a washroom break now.

Ahhh, the token rap act position is taken over by A Tribe Called Quest. "Just throw your hands in the air, and wave them like ..." How did they guess that I just would not care?

George Clinton? Hey, pretty cool except that all t he skater punks insist on mashing to this now.

The only bright spot on the bill is the Beastie Boys with their montage of rap/ funk/hard-core. Fantastic, but I am not standing around for seven hours just to get kicked in the head during "Sabotage" by some crowd-surfer screaming out "Fight For Your Right."

I get the biggest laugh by having the aHernati ve-band-of-the-day, Smashing Pumpkins, headlining this catastrophe. One song after another, all sounding the same, all with the same lyrical content: none. The real moment for truth will be seeing all those lighter flame on for "Disarm." And I'd just laugh.

Lollapalooza started out as a great concept: make a traveling show with bands, cultural information booths, and all kinds of

Cross Country Runners Do you like to run? UCFV has space on the x-country running team.

Four Fall meets. , We need both male and female runners.

Age no object. Last year our runners werre ages 17-38.

For information contact Coach Ron Coreau at 854-4527 or Jane Antil at 854-4583.

Bob Lee Presents

My personal Selection of Wit, Humor, and General, Bitter Sarcasm.

THI JUSTifll:R

By Colleen Mah

Topic# 264

Artwork Penc:Dlng l.dlering

Bob Lee DAVIES

Colourln& Writing

1be city in this comic is imaginary.

1be characters are made up.

Any real life resemblance is coincidental.

•.• he was shot to death!

I/ f

And his killer vanished into darkness!

Say you had a really simple hobby; like picking up a stick and hitting a rock with it. Then afterwards you ran really fast inadiamond-shapedfield. And whenever you did this, people clapped and cheered.

Say that this hobby of yours got to be so popular that some rich people hired you to perform this "feat" on a pre-arranged schedule. (Kind of sounds similar to Shamu's life at SeaWorld, doesn't it?)

But let's say that these nice rich people pay you an EXCESSIVE amount of money to keep on doing this hobby you enjoy. Wow. Life's tough, isn't it? Especially when you earn more than the average John and/or Jane Doe does per year. Talk about stress!

Eventually you get fed up with all this pressure.

Imagine that; your old "hobby" is now a career! So what do you do? You go "ON STRIKE" of course. (Meanwhile Nike is making colllffiercials ...) This is all very hypothetical of course, but what would you suppose the name of this "game" to be? Golf? Noooo -you've got the right idea, but haven't quite hit home yet. Keep trying ...

~'''''''''''''''''''''''~ I UO!J:>npOJJ apl?::>S1?:) aqt ~ /Atapos tuapnts A:I::>n y ,

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~ The JUSTIFIER* crealed t,y Bob Davies UCFV Cascade Vol. 2 No. I, 1994.

"The intentions of these cartoons are not to promote neither racial nor gender discrimination, nor violence; they are merely artistic expression."

~

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