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THURSDAY, September 26, 9pm Mark Sexton Band With special guests Sofa King.

FRI DAY, September 27, 9pm Chico Independent Film Festival Benefit Concert

SATURDAY, October 12, 9pm At the Dungeon or HCPRESENTS.com

Featuring Season of the With and Rock Mountain Tribe.

SATURDAY, September 28, 9pm Alli Battaglia & The Music Brewing Company With The Chris Schadt Band and more.

3 player teams. Sign up with bartender. Starts at 7PM

8-BALL

9-BALL

TOURNAMENT

TOURNAMENT Sign-up at NOON Starts at 1PM


LETTER FROM THE EDITOR SARA CA LVOSA SARA@SYNTHESISNET Have you been following the City Council meetings? Craaaazy stuff happening there, people! As four or five of you may know, I live-tweet the city council meetings from the comfort and safety of my sofa, and this week's meeting was full of cliffhangers and surprises. There is definitely some drama flying between Mayor Gruendl and a cabal of "disgruntled" ex-employees. Check out the screen shots from the Mayor's Facebook page on www. truthmatterschico.com to catch up.

AMAZING RACE HOMEBOYS

CAPER ACRES: NOW WITH ADDED CONVICTS!

You know how you watch those reality shows where people are forced to do really hardcore things in order to be the last one standing to win a prize? And you think to yourself, "those people are huge wussies! I could totally rock that!" Well Brandon Squyres and Adam Switzer sacked up, put their beards in the ring and their biscuits in a Speedo. Check out the Amazing Race on CBS, starting September 29th at 8pm !

Have you heard about the plan to get cons with ankle monitors to clean up Caper Acres in exchange for shaving some time off their sentences? Freshman Council member Randall Stone is getting creative when it comes to finding ways to keep our park open and solve some our fiscal issues. He also talks with us about the controversy surrounding Fund 400 and why he's pushing to allow booze at Bidwell Golf Course. He also let us smell his baby!

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IMMACULATE INFECTION

HOWL

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EDIBLE BITS

OFF MY LAWN!

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COMICAL RUMINATIONS

SEXYTIMES

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SPORTSBALL

SCENE REPORT

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From my vantage point, this is what I see happening: There are some ex-city employees that are being investigated for possibly mishandling funds (i.e., stealing wads of loot from the city and fraudulently covering their tracks). These ex-city employees say that these projects were approved, and they're making a big stink about collecting public records and council minutes to prove their point. Why would they be so outspoken about their innocence, putting up a website, attending the council meetings, and publicly raising hell if they were guilty? If they were guilty, wouldn't they just shrink silently into the shadows and move someplace obscure, like Temecula, and leave us to sort out the mess? Or are they deflecting attention from themselves by trying to create a scene about something else while they change the narrative about their own involvement in the city's deficit problems? These are the questions that are hopefully going to be answered in the coming days. In the meantime, City Councilmember Randall Stone understands that it's his job to keep the ship afloat and stop up the leaks. He's looking at some creative solutions to solving our Caper Acres budget issues, and ways to raise more revenue for Bidwell Park. And he's doing all that while sorting out the Fund 400 debacle and nurdling a brand new baby. He managed to find some time to sit down with us and talk about all the things. Also this week we've got exciting local celebrity news! Two of Chico's own are competing in this season's Amazing Race! Entertainment News reporter Amy Olson really channels Ryan Seacrest and delivers a slam min' interview with Adam Switzer and Brandon Squyres. Be sure to tune in and cheer them on so hard. The Amazing Race premieres on September 29 at 8PM on CBS. Last week we said goodbye to Jen Cartier, but this week we say hello to two new columnists! Jackie Scalf will be reporting on local food stuff in her new column, Edible Bits, and Dan O'Brien will be waxing poetic about all things Sportsball-related in his new column, the Weather Report. They're accepting fan mail at any time.

SEPTEMB ER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29, 2013

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The Synthesis welcomes, wants, and will even desperately beg for letters because we care what you think. We can be reached via snail mail at the Synthesis, 210 W. 6th St., Chico, California, 95928. Email letters@synthesis.net. Please sign all of your letters with your real name, address and preferably a phone number. We may also edit your submission for content and space.

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Amy sells Sara out to the Caper Acres Clean-Up Crew SYNTHES I SWEE KLY. COM


IMMACULATE INFECTION BY BOB HOWARD - MADBOB@MADBOB.COM

SUPPORT LOCAL LIVE MUSIC Live music in Chico is under attack. The Chief of Police has penned a series of recommendations that, if implemented, would basically convert our cheery little burg into a bad Kevin Bacon movie from the '80s. Scattered among a host of draconian (and sometimes bizarre) suggestions, the Chief includes the following: any amplified music that can be heard outside of the establishment is not allowed, there must be one security guard for every twenty-five attendees, no dancing would be allowed, no restaurants are allowed to host live entertainment, no fashion shows, and no topless performances would be allowed. This is only a tiny portion of an exhaustive list. Basically, if it seems like it would be fun, the Chief is against it.

local live entertainment to thrive. The rich and diverse scene we enjoy now-with a number of all-ages and adult venues hosting a wide variety of different styles of music-is a direct result of sweat, toil, sacrifice, commitment, and difficult work. This current scene is the result of collective years of dedication. With a stroke of his pen, the Chief of Police is effectively hoping to tear the whole thing to ribbons. It's offensive. Don't let it happen. Talk to your City Council members and let them know you are a supporter of art, music, and live entertainment in Chico.

It's an affront to what makes (and has made) Chico a great music and arts community for decades.

SOTA Songwriting Competition

I moved up here in early 2000. At that time there was a music scene, but it was on life-support. There was a serious lack of venues, promoters, and talent. But over the course of the ensuing years, a host of people have worked tirelessly to establish venues, host shows, form and promote bands ... the list goes on. All of these elements have come together to form an infrastructure that allows

One organization that has been part of the mix is the Chico State School of the Arts. SOTA is hosting another songwriting competition at Woodstock's Pizza in downtown Chico. The contest runs over the course of a month with showcases being held on Thursday September 26th, Thursday October 3rd, and Thursday October 17th. For songwriters, the format is welcoming; for music fans, this is a wonderful

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way to take in some new talent. The showcases start at 7 o'clock each evening. The prize for the winners is a chance to record their song with the SOTA engineers. These really are great fun. I've been known to get up there and play a few songs, but apparently the judges haven't yet warmed up to my particular style of gothic sleaze-folk. Oh well, that's what I get for being avant-garde. Community To my way of thinking, live music, art, and theater are reflections of the community. For a pittance you can be entertained for an evening. You can talk to other showgoers, meet people, talk to the performers; maybe drink a few cold beverages. •

SEPTEMBER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29, 2013

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EDIBLE BITS BY JACKIE SCALF - EDITORIAL@SY NTHESIS NET

TATTOO ***

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8TH ST. DO\vNTO'w'N CHICO

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EVERYDAY

IJ W U

SUMMER ON A FORK The steady rhythm of bucket drumming, the smell of smoky barbequed meats, tables heaped with brightly colored produce and flowers, and people-people everywhere. This is what I was greeted with last week when I arrived at the Thursday Night Market in downtown Chico. I have been frequenting the Thursday market since my college days; back then it was with a friend or two, with the intent to pop into La Salles and have a pint (or two) and then cruise the market for some serious people-watching and loud chit-chat with friends. Now, it's with my baby strapped snugly in the baby carrier and with my husband by my side, sorting through the bountiful produce to pick what looks and smells best to take home with us, and grabbing dinner from the food stalls. The experience is a little bit different (do they allow babies in La Salles?) but the outcome is more or less the same-a lively outing where I get to bump elbows with the community and bring home some beautiful, local foods. There is so much to choose from right now at the market-little green baskets of juicy berries, sweet peaches, crisp apples, gorgeous flowers, honey, nuts, okra, kale, scallions, and olive oil-all local and just the tip of the iceberg, really. Half the fun is meandering up and down the street, seeing what looks good and then using that as inspiration to create a meal. The berries looked so juicy that berry-focused recipes started racing through my mind-plain Greek yogurt topped with sliced strawberries, sprinkled with granola and drizzled with honey; spinach salad with strawberries and almonds; blackberries swimming in coconut milk; strawberry buttermilk cake. Berries taste just like summer to me, and as the season winds down with shorter days and cooler nights, I want to eat as much of summer as I can fit on my fork.

You don't like strawberries? Use blueberries instead. You don't like berries at all? (Who ARE you?) Use thinly sliced apples/peaches/ plums instead. Make this buttermilk cake once and I swear you will turn to it again and again. It comes out delicious and impressivelooking, and no one needs to know just how dead simple it was to prepare. Strawberry Buttermilk Cake by Smitten Kitchen 1 cup (130 grams) all-purpose flour 1/2 teaspoon (2 grams) baking powder 1/2 teaspoon (2 grams) baking soda 1/4 teaspoon salt 1/2 stick (56 grams) unsalted butter, softened 2/3 cup (146 grams) plus 11/2 tablespoons (22 grams) sugar, divided 1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract 1/2 teaspoon finely grated lemon or orange zest (optional) 1 large (57 grams) egg 1/2 cup (118 ml) well-shaken buttermilk 1 cup (5 ounces or 140 grams) fresh fruit: (raspberries/strawberries/blueberries/blackberries/ cherries/apricots/peaches)

Preheat oven to 400°F with rack in middle. Butter and flour a 9-inch round cake pan. Whisk together flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt. Set aside. In a larger bowl, beat butter and 2/3 cup (146 grams) sugar with an electric mixer at medium-high speed until pale and fluffy, then beat in vanilla (and zest, if using). Add egg and beat well. (I added the egg at the same time as the butter and sugar, just 'cuz I am impatient that way.) At low speed, mix in flour mixture in three batches (beginning and ending with flour, alternating with buttermilk) and mix until just combined. Spoon batter into cake pan, smoothing top. Scatter berries evenly over top and sprinkle with remaining 11/2 tablespoons (22 grams) sugar.

Bake until cake is golden and a wooden pick inserted into center comes out clean, 20 to 25 minutes. Cool in pan 10 minutes, then turn This cake is more of a method than a recipe, out onto a rack and cool to warm, 10 to 15 and if you stick with this column, you will minutes more. Invert onto a plate. see that so many of my recipes are just Thursday Night Market only runs for one that-a method. I like to try a new recipe, more Thursday (the last one of the year is on following it as written, and then the next September 26th), so get yourself there and time I make it I mix it up by adding or subpick up some local food while you can! • tracting whatever suits my palate that day.

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SEPTEMBER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29, 2013

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COMICAL RUMINATIONS BY ZOOEY MAE - ZOOEYMAE@SYNTHESISNET

WE ALL FLOAT DOWN HERE

When I was about eight, I watched the Stephen King classic film, /Twith my best friend. It was one of those really fantastic nights when autumn starts to seep into summer, and there's just a little bite to the air. After the movie was over, because her dad was hilarious (and probably a little sadistic), he thought it would be funny to make us come with him to wash his car. I can say with confidence that him forcing us to stand huddled by the giant drain while he giggled and sprayed soap on his car is probably the worst memory I have attached to a car wash. Or a drain, come to think of it. Anyway, I was reminded of that terrifying memory when I came across a story that 's been circulating the Internet for the last week or so. Apparently there's someone who's been dressing up in a Pennywise costume and scaring the shit out of the residents of Northampton, England. And the man is a social media wizard, because he runs his own Facebook page which is somehow equally as terrifying as the pictures of him that have been circulating. His posts usually read something like this one, from Sept. 16th: "So glad there's a

picture from last night. I didn 't wear my clown shoes as they've got holes in them from all the drains I've been climbing into ... I was in Abingdon yesterday before it rained but there seems to be no pictures ... if what I am doing does get too much for people, I will have to stop." Dear. God. There's something about the

jovial tone he adopts in his posts that really just pushes the whole thing over the edge from creepy to frightening. He keeps hinting that he's planning something big that's just around the bend. I'm pretty sure he plans on brainwashing all the residents of Northampton, and one day we'll wake up to find that he now controls his very own clown army. If you feel like putting some images into your brain box that will never ever go away and will most likely slowly destroy your mind meats, then hop on over to facebook.com/spotnorthamptonsclown. com and let the screaming commence. On a less terrifying, but infinitely more infuriating topic, classic publisher DC Comics has landed itself in hot water lately when it suffered two rapid -fire PR nightmares. Mistake #1 came when they launched a contest wherein fans could draw Harley Quinn, and one of the suggested panels was of her naked in the bathtub on the verge of suicide. In the same week, J.H. Williams Ill and W. Haden Blackman (the creative team behind De's popular series Batwoman) quit over frustrations with the publisher. Apparently, despite Batwoman (Karen Kane) and her significant other (Maggie Sawyer) being engaged, DC refused to actually allow them to marry. Jury's still out on whether the real reason was that they believe a married superhero is a boring superhero (De's claim), or because DC is an antiquated publisher that has refused to evolve with the changing times and to let their titles reflect those changes. •

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SEPTEMBER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29, 2013

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WHEREIN AMY INTERVIEWS ADAM SWITZER AND BRANDON SQUYRES FROM THE AMAZING RACE BY AMY OLSON The phrase "hometown heroes" is often bandied about, to the point where it ceases to have meaning. This is one of those times. Hometown heroes Adam Switzer and Brandon Squyres are our ambassadors to the world at large, representing the very best of Chico : unbridled enthusiasm, humor, charisma, and glorious, glorious facial hair. Whether or not they take first in this season of The Race (as we in the 'biz call it), they will undoubtedly take TV-land by storm. I was privileged to enter the cone of silence for a supervised phone interview; a chaperone at the ready to cut the call should any whiff of show secrets drift through the line. I assume they also had agents training guns on me through the window, though I have no proof. Tell me some things about yourselves that people might not know.

of different reality shows, or were you saving yourselves for The Amazing Race?

Adam : I'm a pretty open book; I think anybody who knows me knows pretty much everything about me.

Adam : Absolutely not, there's no other reality show that we would even consider being on. I actually am not a big fan of TV; The Amazing Race is one of the few shows that I've watched in the last decade or so that I was like 'actually that's a pretty cool show.' And Brandon's been wanting to get on it for years and he's been pestering me, and so we finally got our shit together. Brandon and I made a video the day before or the day of videos being due, and we got a call a day or two days later.

What about people who don't know you? Adam : Then they don't know anything about me. Um ... how about some things that people already know? Adam : Well, people know that I'm pretty spazzy, and that I'm pretty high energy and I can tend to accidentally break their stuff or bleed on their couch. Brandon : Say what you do! Adam : Oh, um, yeah. Now I'm working on a project where I bought some land out in the woods and I'm basically building a farm with my wife. Brandon : I'm a contractor, and I install fire sprinkler systems. We're both building our own houses-I'm actually adding on and he's starting new-and um, I am the singer in three different metal bands : Amarok, Cold Blue Mountain, and The Makai.

Adam: I can't answer that. It was a while. Brandon : Long enough to lose some sleep.

Adam : I've helped Brandon plenty with his house, he hasn't done jack shit on my house. He hasn't even driven a single nail on my house. I WOUNDED myself and almost fell off a ladder, THEN got hit by a chunk of 2x4 that HE THREW AT ME while working on his house. This is before we went for interviews for The Amazing Race. I showed up with a giant, big, gross shanker on my arm from a drill bit. But no, Brandon hasn't done anything on my house.

Did you prepare by taking taxis all over the place and running ziplines and milking goats at petting zoos?

Did you play the field and try out for a bunch

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Oh wow, that happened fast! How long was it before you actually had to leave?

Are you helping each other with your houses?

Brandon : No. I'm not going to either, now.

8

I SHOWED UP WITH A GIANT, BIG, GROSS SHANKER ON MY ARM FROM A DRILL BIT.

Adam (laughing): I don't have the money for taxis! How about putting your hands in gross stuff while yelling at each other? Brandon : Oh, we do that on a daily basis. We've always been into just doing things that other people might consider gross, and goofing around scantilyclad or not clad at all, and just doing wild things

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and jumping off buildings, climbing up buildings, running through the woods. We like activities. Adam : Basically we're doing half the stuff-well not half the stuff-some of the stuff that you would see on the race, only just on a really low budget and very unsafely. Without as many cool costumes.

MAN, DO I LOOK GOOD IN A SPEEDO. Do you feel the need to start wearing cool costumes now? Brandon : We always felt the need to wear cool costumes! Just more-ghetto versions. One thing you can see in our promo video : we like wearing Speedos.

don't really have much going on .

Adam : Let's talk to Christine to make that happen!

Adam : Yeah, and if not we' ll get all the camel owners and protest on the city hall lawn.

Brandon : If Christine can make that happen, we're all about it!

Do you feel like single hump camels are better than double hump camels?

Christine (in the background) : If I can have all the power in the world, you guys, it's on. Alright?

Adam : Uh, no. I'm gonna go double hump.

Adam : Then yeah! We're going to be doing that!

Brandon : I would take any camel, but a double hump is definitely cooler.

Brandon : According to Christine we will be doing that.

It's twice the hump, totally! Adam : Well, you've got a place for somebody else!

Oh, that's true! Or you could get in between them for more stability when you're riding drunk.

That's an oral contract! Adam : You know, it's funny, people think we're just a couple of really hot dudes with beards, but we're more than that. You know, we often don't have beards at all. .. sometimes it's just a mustache! Brandon : We're not just a beard

Adam : That's something I just discovered about myself. I bought my first Speedo for The Race! And man, do I look good in a Speedo.

Brandon : Or a person on each hump and one in the middle!

Adam : Yeah, we're not just a hairy face.

Adam : He's only a sober camel operator.

Brandon : We have personalities, and we're more than that.

Brandon : I'll pick people up on my camel!

Adam : We're not just brawny bearded super-studs.

Brandon : It really changed the way you look at swimsuit apparel.

Adam : I'm often drunk and need a ride home.

What more could there even need to be?

That's so green.

Adam : Wait till you see us in a Speedo.

Brandon : Yeah.

Brandon : Exactly.

That's kind of an epiphany in life, that'll change everything! Adam : I don't know why, but it took until I'm almost 35 to find out how cool Speedos are!

Do you feel like you go faster when you're wearing a Speedo? Adam : Oh man, I am f-lyin'. Brandon : Yeah, if you're jumping off a cliff and you 're in a Speedo, you look way cooler. Adam : You know, you may not actually be faster, but it sure feels faster.

YOU KNOW, IT'S FUNNY, PEOPLE THINK WE'RE JUST A COUPLE OF REALLY HOT DUDES WITH BEARDS

Now that you're home, have you had a hard time adjusting to things being less Amazing and Racy? Adam : No, I had a bunch of shit to get to. Brandon : It was actually timed kind of badly for us, we were just in the middle of like ... him starting his house, me finishing my addition, Cold Blue Mountain is recording an album .. so it was kind of a bad time for me to leave that stuff, but it was totally worth it.

That's the key really-time is just perception.

How did you cultivate such fantastic beards? Tell me the truth; were there performance-enhancing drugs involved, like face-Rogaine?

Brandon : Exactly.

Adam : Healthy homegrown food, and sweat.

What's better: Donkeys or Camels? Explain.

Brandon : But I am not opposed to saying I used any of that, if someone wants to give me a beard-endorsement deal. I' ll lie, I don't care. Or I'll start using it!

(stunned silence)

Both : CAMELS! Brandon : I want a camel so bad.

Adam : We tried to tell Phil [Keoghan] that. "Phil, if we could postpone this a little? The beardos aren't quite ready, maybe another month? Just have everybody wait at the starting line, we'll be there."

How do you feel about the state of Race relations in modern American society?

Brilliant!

Adam : Whoa.

Adam : That's actually one of the things we're gonna do if/when we win the million bucks : I'm buying Brandon a camel.

Adam : Maybe your beard' II get bigger!

Brandon : Wheeeew.

Brandon : I'll try it just on a half [of my face].

Yeah, mm-hmm. I know.

Brandon : I'm gonna ride it through the park.

Yes! it'll be like that half-man/half-woman thing, but all man.

Adam : Um, could that mean "Amazing Race" relations? Um, my wife is really awesome ... and Brandon-while quite a sexy beast and quite the catch-is not exactly my type, so I didn' t have any relations on the Race.

Adam : Well, I think you 're going to get ticketed if you ride it in lower park; I think you can only ride it in upper park, dude. Brandon : Well, you can ride horses in lower park. Adam : Yeah, but the horses ... Conan doesn't punch horses-oh wait Conan does punch horses too.

(I make a confused face but they can't see it because we're on the phone) Brandon : Yeah, we're going to have to look it up. Adam : Yeah, we'll have to look up the park rules on camels.

Huhhh, yeah, that's worth taking to the city council; they

Adam : I actually just recently had that going on because I split my lip with a sledgehammer, and I had to shave a big swath of my mustache out so I could try to bandage it shut. But it's lovely, it's growing back ok.

Good! That was going to be my follow up-is your beard OK!? Adam : The beard's fine. I was rockin the half-stache for a while, but I left the long curly tips, so the middle's just filling in again.

Will you be getting your own spinoff called The Amazing Face where regular people try to out-beard you?

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Brandon : Me neither. There were members of The Race that may have wanted to have relations with me, but I shut them down.

Like you could just sense it? Brandon : Oh no, it was clearly stated! It was definitely put out there. The Amazing Race premieres Sunday, Sept. 29 at 8pm on CBS

SEPT EMB ER 23 - SEPTE MB ER 29, 2013

9


CAPER ACRES CHAIN GANG:

AN INTERVIEW WITH RANDALL STONE BY SARA CALVOSA City Councilman Randall Stone, in partnership with the Butte County Sheriff, has come up with a plan to save Caper Acres. And by save, I mean keep it open and make sure that the used crackpipes are all picked up. He also filled me in on Fund 400 and how we ended up in this ever-deepening financial hole. So, Caper Acres, with added convicts! Will they be singing prison songs on a cha in gang while they work?

No, this is not Sheriff Arpaio; this a lot friendlier Sheriff's department. This is a collaborative effort between Sheriff [Jerry] Smith, Undersheriff Kory Honea, and Sheriff's Captain Andy Duke. Other communities have done this already, so we can see where it's had success or failed, etc. These folks are otherwise incarcerated individuals who now have an ankle bracelet, and they're supervised by a deputy sheriff. They're trying to shave off up to a third of their jail sentence. And if these people are even late, they are considered escapees. These are people who would otherwise be in the state penitentiary, but for reasons related to AB109 are in County Jail-and the county jails are full. These are "triple-nons" : non-violent, non-sexual, nonpredatory. No chester molesters, no predatory behaviors. Embezzlement is a perfect example-a financial crime that you would most certainly get years in jail for and you'd be hoping to try to work that off. Sounds good, when can they start?

I've been working on this for a couple of months now. ServPro's contract ends October 1st, and it's been extended to November 1st. We asked them to extend it longer because we wanted to get our folks in place. It's going to go before council-but it doesn't necessarily have to go before council because we' re not expending any cost. I don't want to undermine my colleagues, so we'll go before council in October and I' m hoping we'll get the support. There is no set term ; I suspect it's going to work out quite well. Where do they come from? Are they bussed in from County?

No, no, they're wearing ankle bracelets. They could be living right next door to you. They're already here, they're already your neighbors, you just may not know that they're in alternative custody. These people are not coming from jail ; they' re coming on their own, in their own cars, under their own power. What we worked out with the department heads, and what seemed logical, was having them do eight hours on Monday when the big heavy work is done, then Thursday mornings from 7 to 9 A.M. before Caper Acres even opens. And every Thursday we pressure-wash Sycamore Pool ; it takes all day to do this. Now we don't want to get rid of jobs for city employees and replace them with Alternative Custody Supervision folks, but if there's something else that we' re neglecting, I want

10

SEPTEMBER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29, 2013

people to work on that. And the pressure washing can be done by ACS. So we're not losing any jobs. We don't have enough money to fill the jobs; we've got a workload and the workload is intense, but we want to keep the staff moving and working on the things that need to be worked on. Tree limbs are the most obvious-we had to lay off tree crews. Is it possible that maybe we could shift the workload so that now we can send some people over to do tree work? Which is also, by the way, what ServPro is doing. ServPro is not actually working at Caper Acres. The work that ServPro is doing is not conducive to Caper Acres-the reason being that they don't have HepB vaccinations, they're dealing with needles and stuff. So who's actually cleaning up Caper Acres?

City Staff. Because ServPro is volunteering to keep Caper Acres open, we were able to put ServPro on [something else] and divert staff. It costs $20,000 dollars a year to keep Caper Acres open. Some people have wondered why the City would cut Caper Acres' funding when it's really just a drop in the bucket compared to the rest of the deficit.

That is the situation we are in. You already see that we' re fighting for $20,000 for Caper Acres. The Big Ugly here is that we-not me, I wasn't on the council [then]-were being told, and certain departments were reporting that we were in such-and-such a condition and that we were making necessary cuts. But in reality that wasn't what we were doing. And I think you're going to find that the audit reports that too. I don't know how and why-you couldn't, shouldn't, and wouldn't have known as a staffer that what was going on there was apropos. It's outrageous. Now that doesn't have anything to do with the tree folks, or the Caper Acres folks, and by and large our city employees bust their asses and do a great job. But you see how hard we' re fighting for just the $20,000 to keep Caper Acres going. Lots of talk about Fund 400 in last week's city council meeting. What happened there?

So, we book administrative time. We book overhead. Say employee A is going to be working on a project, some Capital Project. So staff works on it, and we say staff is going to have 10 hours on a Capital Project out of 40 hours of their week. We book staff-time of 10 hours that's supposed cont. on page 16

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SEPTEMBER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29, 2013

11


FOOD & DRINK CALENDAR Holiday Inn

MON

Daily Happy Hour

Mon-Fri 2-6PM

from 4-7PM

$1.50 PBR or Coors Pints

fries or salad

Beer

$2.50 Dom & Sierra

PBR $2.2S Everyday!

$2 Kami Shooters

5-9m $4 Pizza Slice & Domestic Beer Combo 5-7pm Dollar Wings

Nevada Drafts

1/2 OFF POOL

3-6PM v$3.SO Dbl We lls

Pool League, 3 player

MONSTER MONDAY

6PM -close

t eams. Sign up with

SPECIALS 6PM-CLOSE

$8 Dom Pitcher

bartender. Starts 7PM. All ages until lOPM

BEER $3/4/S/6 $1 SHOTS

Chicken Strip Sand only

5-9pm $4 Pizza Slice &

Food & Drink specials!

$1.50 PBR or Coors Pints

$6.SO before 6 PM

Domesti c Bee r Combo

11AM-2PM $2.50 SN &

PBR $2.2S Everyday!

$2 Kami Shooters

DOLLAR DAZE 6-9pm

$6 Blended Drinks 7-llpm

1/2 OFF POOL

$1 Bee r $1 W ells

$3 Coronas 7-llpm

Dom Drafts 2-close $2.50 w ells & Dom

L

TACO Will 8E OF EQUAL OR lEllER VALUE LIMIT 5 PER CUITOHER PER DAY. EXPIRE\ 9/16/ll

- - - -

-------

.J

~~TI~~

$2 Doubl es

Drafts $3.50 Dbl Wells &

GAME NIGHT!

Kami shots

$1 PBR all ni g ht

FREE Pool after lOPM

All ages until lOPM Daily Happy Hour from 4-7PM

Mon-Fri 2-6PM

Reuben Sand w/ fries or

5-9pm $4 Pizza Slice &

$1.50 PBR or Coors Pints

salad $6.50

Domestic Beer Combo

Full Bar in Back Room

$2 Kami Shooters

Spm-Close 1/2 off kids

S-Bpm $2 W ell Drinks

Weds, Fri & Sat Nights!

1/2 OFF POOL

items

Hump Day Wine Special

8pm-Close Pitcher

$3 House Wine $S

$3.50 Fireball, Jim Beam,

8 Ball Tournament Sign-up

Specials $6/$9/$12

Smoking Loon

Captain Morgan and

6PM. Starts 7PM.

FREE Pool after lOPM

$2 for 3 Wings

WED

, .. ---------BUY ONE FRIED FUH TACO AND GET ONE FREE

FREE Pool after lOPM

Mon-Fri 2-6PM

WING WEDNESDAY!

FRI SAT SUN

5-9pm $8 Burgers and

Daily Happy Hour from 4-7PM

2 DOLLAR TUESDAY!

THU

$6.SO Pull ed pork sand

25 cent wings from halftime 'til they're gone!

$9 SN Pitcher

TUE

w/

Mon-Fri happy hour 11-2PM

$2 .SO SN Pint All Day 8PM-Close

PBR $2.2S Everyday!

Jameson BUCK NIGHT

11-2PM $2.50 Dom

Baby Back Ribs $10.99

5-9pm $4 Pi zza Slice &

& Sierra Nevada Drafts

Daily Happy Hour from 4-7PM

Mon-Fri 2-6PM

9-Close

$1.50 PBR or Coors Pints

Philly Ch eesesteak $7.50

Domesti c Bee r Combo

$1 Well Cocktails

3-6PM

PBR $2 .2S Eve ryday!

$2 Kami Shooters

$1 Teas

$3.SO Dbl Wells

1/ 2 OFF POOL

8-close $3 Soccer Moms

JAZZ NIGHT- Martini

$5 Smirnoff Bla st ers

Specials

$5 DBL Roaring Vodka

All ages until lOPM

$3 14oz Slushi es

11-2PM

$4 20oz Slushi es

$2.SO Dom &

Add shot for $1 5 fllavors to choose from

Sierra Nevada Drafts 3-6PM

Weds, Fri & Sat Nights! PBR $2.2S Everyday!

$4.50 Dbl Bacardi Ccktls

$3.SO Dbl Wells

9-Close

8-Close

BACARDI PROMO

$2 .SO Dom & SN Drafts

$2 off any appetizer 6pm-Close $4 Grad t ea s

S-9pm

$3 All be er pints

$3 Si erra Neavada Pal e &

FREE Pool after lOPM

Old Chico 7-llpm $S Double W ells 8-12am

Daily Happy Hour from 4-7PM

Mon-Fri 2-6PM

10 oz. Tri-Tip Steak w /

8-llprn $2 Domestic Beers

$1.50 PBR or Coors Pints

Fries or Salad & Garlic

and $2 Wells

Full Bar in Back Room

$2 Kami Shooters

Bread $8.99

20% off Entres 5-8pm

8pm-Close $4 Jager 1/2 OFF POOL

$S DBL Vodka Red Bull

All ages unbl lOPM

$6 Jager Red Bull $2 Kamikaze shots FREE Pool after lOPM

$3 14oz Slushi es

Open at llAM!

Daily Happy Hour

$4 20oz Slushies

from 4-7PM

Fries & garlic bread

$S Double W ells

Add shot for $1

Bloody Mary Bar Noon-6PM

Bartend ers Choice

Baby Back Ribs w /Salad,

Full Bar in Back Room

$10.99

8-Midnight

5 fllavors to choos e from

$8 Dom Pitcher

W eds, Fri & Sat Nights!

9 Ball Tournam ent.

$4.50 Dbl Bacardi Ccktls

$9 SN Pitcher

PBR $2 .2S Eve ryday!

Sign-up at noon. Starts

$4 Single/$6 Doubl e

9-Close

8PM-Close

lPM.

Ja ck or Captain

BACARDI PROMO

$6.SO DBL calls

$4 Blasters

8pm-Close

$2 Si erra Nevada All ages until lOPM

FREE Pool after lOPM

10AM-2PM

Daily Happy Hour

FREE POOL

$S .19 Grad/Garden/

Dollar Wings 5-8pm

$5 Bottles of Champagne

from 4-7PM

1 hr. with every $8

Turkey Burger w/fries

$7 Domestic Pitchers

with entree

PBR $2.2S Everyday!

purchase

or salad

$8 Sierra Nevada Pitchers

$4.SO Bloody Mary

All ages unti110PM

SS.SO Absolut Peppar

Bloodies $3 Well , $4 Call, $S Top, $6 Goose

Bloody Marys

Mimosas $2/fiute, $S/pint $6 Beer Pitchers FREE Pool after lOPM

WEDNESDAY 9PM • FRIDAY 4-7PM

DANCE NIGHT • THE PUB SCOUTS DJ SPE NNY & JEFF HOWSE

*

DU RIN G HAPPY HOUR

COME ENJOY AN ICE COLD BEER

& ICE COLD AIR CONDITIONING!

12

SEPTEMBER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29, 2013

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM


Lounge V1pu1tra

Go Down l o

BEA R-E-OK E

OPEN M IC - M USIC

BUR GER MA DNE SS !

M UG NI GHT 7-11 :30

$2 Marqis

CLOSED FOR

EVERY OAY

REN OVATI ONS

Hap py Hour- 4-7pm $ 1.75

$3 Cuervo Marq is

Pints, $ 1.00 Shots, 1/2 off

$2.50 Corona's

Bear Burger w ith fri es

40oz beer $2.50 or $3

all Single cockta ils,

& Sierra Drafts

or sa lad for $5.29.

$3 Fireball Shot

$1.00 Food items

Mon-Sat 3PM-6PM $ 1

llam-lO pm.

2 fo r 1 Burgers lla m-8 pm

CLOSED

Do m d raft, $2 SN dra ft, $ 1.SOwe lls

$1 Kamikazes

GoDown l o

$3 Jam eson an d Skw Special

BEAR WEAR !

KARAOK E 9-CLOSE

CLOSED

1/2 off w hile wea ri ng Bea r Wear. M UG CLUB 4- lOP M

Happy Hou r- 4-7pm Buck

Progress ive Night !

night 9 pm-l am

8-lOPM $1 Sierra Pale

$5 Dbl Bacard i & Co ke $3 Go ldsc hlager

Ale, Domestics, Ro lling

$3 Bus hmill s

up lOP M-close 25C pe r

Rock & we ll cockta ils hou r-close

Mon-Sat free pool 6-8 PM

Go Downl o

T RIKE RAC ES!

SMAS HED SPELLIN G BEE

CLOSED

Post ti me @ l Opm.

Hap py Hour- 4-7pm

Buck Night

Happy Hou r S-8 PM

1/2 off all cockta il s, $ 1. 75

8-close

$5 House Martinis

W in T-shirts and Bea r

$4 Dbl Jack Daniels Honey

Drafts, Guest bartenders

$1 we ll cockta ils, Sierra

$4 Glass of House W ine

Bucks.

Le monad e

eve ry wee k

Nevada Pale Ale, Rolling

$3 We ll Cockta il s

M UG CLU B 4-lOPM

$3 Jose Cuervo Silver

Roc kdom draft

20% off wine by bottle

Su nrise

$3 Guiness Drafts,

$ 1 off Call li quor

$2 Bl ac k Butte

and bottled beer

$3 Glass of W ine

$5 Vodka Red bu ll $2.50 Pi nnacle Coc kta ils

Dri nk specials!

$2.50 Pint of Sierra Nevada Half Off Rocksta r Cockta ils

BUR GER MA DNE SS !

KA RAO KE 9 PM

CLOSED

Hap py Hour- 4-7pm

Bea r Burger w it h fri es

$3.50 151 party punch

Happy Hour S-8 PM

$3 Fire Eater Shots

$5 House Marti ni s

$2 Se lect Bee rs

o r sa lad fo r $5.29.

$4 Dbl Gin & To ni c

SO ce nt we ll drin ks

$6.50 Apple Cinnamon

$4 Glass of House W in e

$3 Teas

l lam -l Op m .

$2 Scotch & Soda

9- lOpm $2 Kamis,

Cider

$3 We ll Coc kta il s

$3 Barenj age r

$2 Fireball, $3 Che rry

8-9 PM $ 1 pa le ale

20% off w ine by bottle

Bl asters, $2 bottle Beer lOpm-l am

and dam draft

$ 1 off Ca ll liquor

up 25C per hou r unti l

an d bott led bee r

close $2.50 Fireball Shots

Dri nk specials!

$2.50 Pi nts of Sierra

LATE NI GHT EATS! BEA R

LGBTQ DANC E PARTY

CLOSED

BU RGER AN D FRIE S FOR

Hap py Hour- 4-7pm

Powe r Hour 8-9 PM

Happy Hour S-8 PM

$5 Fr idays 4-S pm Most

1/2 off Liquor & Drafts

$5 House Martin is $4 Glass of House W ine

Nevada

VIP Bott le Se rv ice

ONLY $4.99 !

$5 Dbl Vodka Rocksta r $3

food items and pitchers of

9PM-C lose

$5.50 Double Pin nacle

ava ilable

Mon-Sat lOpm - l am .

Fireba ll

bee r are $5

$3 Pale Ale Drafts

Vodka & Red Bull

$9. 75 Pa le Pitche rs

$4 Dbl Coconut Press

$3 Double Well Cockta ils

$3 We ll Cockta il s 20% off w ine by bottle $ 1 off Ca ll liquor and bottled beer

Half Off Rocksta r Cockta ils

LATE NI GHT EATS! BE A R

$2.50 Pi nt of Sier ra Nevada

BURGER AND FRIE S FO R

$3 Featu red Shot of t he

$$ Bartende r 's Cho ice $$

Night

ONLY $4.99 ! Mon-Sat lOpm - l am .

LI VE DJ

CLOSED

$4 Dbl Gin & Ton ic $3 Cpt n Morga n & Coke

Happy Hou r- 4-7pm

M o n-Sat 3PM -6 PM

Hot dog m enu all day

$ 1 Dom d raft, $2 SN d raft,

$5 House Ma rti nis

11am-8 pm, All Day and

$1.50 we lls,

$4 Glass of House W ine

All Night Tall ca ns of bee r

$3 Rumpl emi nz

1/2 o ff Liquor & Draft s

20% off w ine by bott le

9-Close $3 Skyy Cockta ils

$ 1 off Call li quo r and bott led beer

Party 9- llpm 32oz Teas

& Pale Ale Drafts $9.75

are $2.50

Pale Pi tche rs

Hap py Hour- 4-7 pm

CLOSED

HALF OF F EVERYTHIN G

Ca ll To Rent For Pri vate

BURGER MAD N ESS !

LI VE JAZZ 4 PM

Party

Bea r Burger w it h fri es

TR IVIA8PM

Champagne Brunch

$2.50 M imosas & Bloody

Game (20 Tv's), $3 Bloody

or sa lad fo r $5.29. Go Dow n Lo

l lam -lOpm.

$3 Well Coc kta il s

(24oz) $3 .50, $2 Ca pri sun Shots, All Teas $3.50, Tea

(Except Red Bull and Premium Liquors)

CLOSED

Powe r Hour 8-9 PM

Happy Hour S-8 PM

CLOS ED

930am- l pm, Eve ry Nfl Marys

m arys,

$4 Dbl Cabin Fever (ma pl e

$3 screwd ri ve rs, $5

w hiskey) & Coke

pitchers of beer

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SE PTE MB ER 23 - SE PT EMBER 29, 2013

13


BEST BETS FRESH ENTERTAINMENT FOR THIS WEEK THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 26TH

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 27TH

MA RK SEXTON BA ND SO FA KING

JOHN CR IAG IE PAT HULL SCOTT !TAMURA

LOSTON MAIN

GRUB COOPERATIVE I am Sofa King excited about these Sofa King great musicians! Also, I'm Sofa King bummed that I can't do anything funny with Mark Sexton's name. Oh wait! MARK your calendars, this will be a SEX-TON of fun! Um, nevermind, I'll just show myself out. 9pm

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 2STH

BIDWELL BARK

CHICO CREEK NATURE CENTER

The only reason not to go to this benefit for Butte Humane Society is if you hate animals, and what kind of sociopath hates animals? If proving you're not a monster wasn't enough, there will be dogs wearing tiny costumes! Bring your dog and watch your step, there may be poop landmines. 8am-12pm

What could be more relaxing than outdoor massages, and live music from Vickie Lea Eggen, Alli Bataglia & Mandalyn May, Deedee Vest, John Micheal Sun, and Claudia Cuentas Oviedo? Only $10 for 10 minutes of massage from at least 9 bodyworkers (not all at once) . 12-6pm

1078 Gallery: Hell, Plague Widow, Hearses, and Astronaut. All ages. $5. 8pm

25 WEDNESDAY 1078 Gallery: Chico Visual Arts Alliance mixer and open mic. 5-7pm Laxson Auditorium: Beauty and the Beast Jr, by the Blue Room Young Company. $8-$15. 7:30pm

Blue Room Theatre: Gruesome Playground Injuries. Advance tickets $12. 7:30pm

14

SEPTEMBER 16 - SEPTEMBER 22, 2013

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 29TH TOUCH OF CHICO

ONE MILE RECREATION AREA

23 MONDAY

26 THURSDAY

Do you like the land, air, and water of Butte County? How about benefit concerts? You DO? Howzabout indulging all that affection at the Butte Environmental Council Land Air Water Benefit Concert?! Tickets available at Chico Natural Foods & Empire Coffee . $15 presale, $17 at the door. All ages . 7:30pm

Cafe Coda: Aberrance, Drag Me Under, Epitaph of Atlas. 8-llpm

27 FRIDAY Blue Room Theatre: Gruesome Playground Injuries. Advance tickets $12. 7:30pm Cafe Coda: Monk Warrior, Thomas Fogg, Belda Beast. All ages. 8-llpm Cafe Flo: Irish Music Jam. 5-7pm, followed by Deadgrass. 7-lOpm

AZ Redsmoke on the patio. 9pm

Cafe Coda: Names Divine, Bunnymilk,

Lost On Main: The Chico Independent Film Festival Benefit Concert, featuring Season of the Witch, Rock Mountain Tribe. 9pm

Coyote Church, She Fetus. 8pm

Monstro's: Juicy Karkass, The Barfly Effect, Mom and Dad, Criminal Wave . All ages. $5. 8pm The Tackle Box: Stephany Rae comes into town for some country music. $2 . 9pm

Cafe Flo: Bluegrass Jam. 1-4pm Dex: Slut River, Criminal Wave, Gyro Spazzers, lcko Sicko. All ages. $5. 8pm El Rey Theatre: Bobcat Goldthwait w/ Chris Voth . $15. 18+. Doors open 7pm , Show8pm Lost On Main: Alli Battaglia & The Musical Brewing Co, Corduroy Jim, The Storytellers, Chris Schadt Band.

Chico Women's Club: lOOth Anniversary Progressive Dinner, music by Sabor de la Tierra trio at 5:15pm LaSalle's: Dueling video set, DJ Trazz vs. DJ Babyface. DJ EmVee opening, and

28 SATURDAY

$5 . 9pm

Blue Room Theatre: Gruesome Play-

The Tackle Box: Country music from 3

ground Injuries. Advance tickets $12.

Fingers Whiskey. 9pm

7:30pm

SYNTHES I SWEE KLY. COM


ONGOING EVENTS Downtown Chico: Thursday Night Mar-

23 MONDAY The Bear: Bear-E-oke ! 9pm Cafe Flo: Live Jazz Happy Hour with the Carey Robinson Trio. 5-7pm DownLo: Pool League. 3 player teams, signup with bartender. 7pm

ket. 6-9pm lOOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Open Mic. All ages . 7pm The Bear: Trike Races. Wint-shirts and Bear Bucks. Post time lOpm. Mug Club 4-lOpm

Cafe Flo: Live Jazz Happy Hour with the Carey Robinson Trio. 5-7pm, then Way Maltese: Open Mic Night. Comedy. Out West Country Showcase, featuring Signups at 8pm , starts at 9pm. Mug Night The Blue Merles. 7-9:30pm 7-11:30pm Crazy Horse Saloon: Swing Dance Woodstock's: Spelling Bee for the Wednesday. 8-lOpm Grownups. 6:30-7 :30pm Chico Women's Club: Afro Brazilian Dance with Baba Kahanus. 5:30-7pm Last Call Lounge: Karaoke. 8pm-12am

24 TUESDAY lOOth Monkey Cafe & Books: lntermediate Bellydance Class with BellySutra. $8. 6-7pm Cafe Flo: Open Mic Singer-Songwriter Night with Aaron Jaqua. 7-9pm Chico Women's Club: Afro Carribean Dance. $10/class or $35/mo. 5:50-7pm . Followed by Capoeira, $3-$10. 7:308:30pm

Dex: Hip Hop Wednesday. $6. 8:30pm DownLo: 8 Ball Tournament . Signups 6pm Duffy's: Dance Night! DJ Spenny and Jeff Howse. 9pm. $1. Jesus Center: Derelict Voice Writing Group, everyone welcome. 9-10:30am

The Graduate: Red Bull Movie Night. lOpm Grana: Live Jazz with John Seid. 5:308:30pm Has Beans: Open Mic Night. 7-lOpm. Signups start at 6pm Holiday Inn Bar: Karaoke. 9pm-lam LaSalle's: Live Music Happy Hour. 5-9pm. No cover. Featuring Mack Morris. Maltese: Karaoke . 9pm-close .

Maltese: Fabulous Friday LGBTQ+ Dance Party. 9pm

Quackers: Karaoke night with Andy. 9pm-lam

Quackers: Live DJ . 9pm Sultan's Bistro: Bellydance Performance. Two soloists featured . 6:30-7:30pm T-Bar: Live Music. 7-8 :30pm Tortilla Flats: Latin Nights. DJ El Kora de Chico .

28 SATURDAY lOOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Knitting

The Tackle Box: DJ Thomas. 8pm-lam

Circle . 2-4pm

VIP Ultra Lounge (Inside The Beach):

The Bear: DJ Dancing every thursday, Fri-

Acoustic performance with Bradley Relf. 7-9pm. No Cover.

day, and Saturday night. No Cover. 9pm Cal Skate: Adults only skate night. $6.

Woodstock's: Open Mic Night.

18+.9-llpm Crazy Horse Saloon: Ladies Night Dancing w/DJ Hot Rod. 10pm-1:30am

27 FRIDAY

Crazy Horse Saloon: All Request Karaoke . The Tackle Box: Swing Dance Wednesday, lOOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Writing

DownLo: 9 Ball tournament. Signups

21+

classes 7-9pm

Group. 3:30-Spm

noon, starts at lpm. Live music mith

DownLo: DJ Dancing with DJ Ron Dare

VIP Ultra Lounge (Inside The Beach): Laurie Dana. 7-9pm

The Beach: DJ 2K & Mack Morris. 9pmclose. $2, $10 VIP.

Farm Star Pizza: Live Jazz with Shigemi and Friends. 6:30-8:30pm Holiday Inn Bar: Salsa Lessons, 7-9pm. Salsa Dancing, 9-llpm

Woodstock's: Trivia Night plus Happy Hour. call at 4pm to reserve a table. Starts at 8pm

LaSalle's: '90s night. 21 + Maltese: Karaoke. 9pm-Close Park Avenue Pub: Hanging by a String Band. 7-9pm Studio Inn Lounge: Karaoke. 8:30pmlam The Tackle Box: Karaoke. 9pm Woodstock's: Trivia Challenge. Call at 4pm to reserve a table. Starts 6:30pm

26 THURSDAY

The Bear: DJ Dancing every thursday, Friday, and Saturday night. No Cover. 9pm Cafe Coda: Friday Morning Jazz with Bogg. llam Cafe Flo: Flo Sessions weekly music showcase. 7-lOpm

day, and Saturday night. No Cover. 9pm

Crazy Horse Saloon: DJ Hot Rod and

DownLo: Chico Jazz Collective every Thursday. Followed by Mark Sexton Trio. 8pm

VISITING THE THURSDAY NIGHT MARKET? STOP BY FOR OUR

FARMER'S MARKET SPECIALI

MazAzul. 9pm

The Bear: DJ Dancing every thursday, Fri-

Cafe Flo: Blues Unplugged with Mark " Porkchop" Holder. 7-lOpm

of~oulhtn fltafu

Peeking Chinese Restaurant: BassMint. Weekly electronic dance party. $3. 9:30pm

Panama's: Eclectic Nights. Buck night and DJ Eclectic on the patio. 9pm

Kalico Kitchen: Karaoke, with prizes! 8-lOpm Maltese: Smashed Spelling Bee. 9pm

fJfrze 0ininu in lhe CTraJition

at9pm

LaSalle's: 1980Now! 8pm Maltese: Live DJ Park Avenue Pub: Live Music with Max Minardi. 6:30-9:30pm Quackers: Live DJ . 8:30pm-lam Scotty's Landing: Music Showcase. Open Mic hosted by Rich & Kendall. 5-9pm

Mechanical Bull Contest. 9pm-1:30am DownLo: Y, off pool. All ages until lOpm

29 SUNDAY

Duffy's: Pub Scouts- Happy Hour. 4-7pm

LaSalle's: Karaoke . 9pm

Holiday Inn Bar: Karaoke. 9pm-lam

Maltese: Bogg! 4-7pm

LaSalle's: Fireball Fridays. Music starts

The Tackle Box: Karaoke. 8pm

tlflll.

··~~=~~:;~~--Brmg_m_nus··c:aiifioil"-far··1

St OFF Pops-size Pie! Hours: Mon-Wed & Friday 11am-8pm @Spike's Bottle Shop 1270 East 1st Avenue 530.864.2760

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- '

:

<Tm!t.

<Italian.

1020 MAIN STREET CHICO "'•?) 530.3~5.2233 (G-r' SEPTEMBER 16 - S EPTEMBER 22, 201 3

15


cont. from page 10 to come out of the Capital Projects budget. Well, let's say there's only 5 hours worth of work in Capital Projects. We've billed 10 hours. That means that 5 hours has to come out of somewhere, and where does it come out? The General Fund. That's how we incur a debt. So employee A shouldn't have been billing 10 hours to Capital Projects. It's fraud, really, when you do that. I mean, fraud is the wrong word because it's an f-word ... but what you're doing is overbilling to a particular account. So we created work for staffers to work on things. We were 2.5 million dollars in deficit, and now it turns out we were 3.3 million dollars in deficit because we can't account for almost $800,000 of those 10-hour slots. So that has to be paid back from somewhere, and it always has to be paid back by the General Fund. That type of double billing, back billing, incorrect billing of hours ... they asked me if I was surprised if this was the case and I said, yeah it was surprising, but I wasn't shocked. I don't know how you can be shocked.

fill the holes, and make sure everyone has life rafts in case we do have to bail out. We're not going to have to do that; we're not going to declare bankruptcy, so that analogy is a little bit bad. But the ship is taking on water, and I can't get into the mix about who/why/how right now; I've got to address Caper Acres. I've got to keep these things moving. Aside from the Caper Acres Chain Gang and the Fund 400 problems, you're also working to bring the smokes and suds back to Bidwell Park Golf Course. With all the issues surrounding alcohol and licensing, why this crusade and why now?

I MEAN, FRAUD IS THE WRONG WORD BECAUSE IT'S AN F¡WORD...

There are a few funds that are our big behemoths. If you're looking at these [budgets] like they're big rocks, and Fund 400 is one of those huge rocks-you see a whole bunch of crap going on with the General Fund, and you see a whole bunch of crap going on with the Redevelopment Agency-guess what's gonna happen when you turn over that rock? We know Fund 400 is going to be messed up. When you have three cookie jars and one's been stolen from, and you see a kid with chocolate all over his face and he says, "no I wasn ' t in the cookie jar," but it's all over his hands and face, what do I think I'm going to see when I open up the other cookie jars? I'm guessing, yeah, they're going to be taken from as well. So no, I was surprised, but I wasn't shocked.

We're in crisis mode and we need to address the problems. The ship is going down and I'd rather get the ship back up,

So here you are, going to Bidwell Park, paying user fees. [We're] paying a fee to somebody for the right to go play on a bunch of grass, and they maintain the grass so that [we] can play there. Well, if I don' t have a secondhandsmoking issue on a golf course because [we're] so spread out, then it's a clean -up issue, a fire issue. We've had smoking on the golf course before, and there is so much irrigation out there that they police that activity and they're able to keep an eye on fire suppression. I'm all for smoking bans; I support it, including downtown, where you ' re impacting other people. But at the golf course, none of those issues apply and [we' re] paying an organization that will police that. If their fees need to go up in order to appropriate the security on that, fine, so be it. [We're] paying for that privilege.

The city owns all of Bidwell Park, including the golf course. Bidwell Park Golf Course is a non-profit organization that leases the golf course affordably from the City of Chico. Any money they make, because they're non-profit, goes into the golf course at Bidwell Park. So the city hopes the golf course is doing well and it's managed appropriately. The golf club does not do any management maintenance, so they hire Empire Golf in order to maintain the golf course. This is a relatively new relationship. I was sitting next to Rob Metzler at an awards ceremony for Bidwell Park and I said, ''I'm going to bring alcohol back to the golf course, would that be important to you?" And he said, "You bet;

16

SEP TEMBER 23 - SEPT EMBER 29, 2013

I TALKED TO CHIEF TROSTLE ABOUT IT BACK WHEN WE WERE IN THE MIDDLE OF ALL THIS ALCOHOL DISCUSSION. I SAID, "HEY LOOK BABY, l'M BRINGING THIS ON BOARD." I'll tell you right now, I would easily turn 15-20% on green's fees. Just in that fact alone." The money that they raise goes back into the golf course. And for a city that spends 2.6 million dollars on its park that only brings in $103,000? Anything that we can do to bridge that gap would be fantastic. That alone makes it worthwhile and sensible. And remember, any problems that they would have with alcohol at the golf course? You're paying a user fee for them to police the activities. So this was absolutely a no-brainer to me. So the alcohol sales would be money earned above and beyond what the golf course is currently pulling in? Yeah, and people are already buying the booze, stuffing it in their bags and going out on the course. I talked to Chief Trostle about it back when we were in the middle of all this alcohol discussion. I said, "Hey look baby, I'm bringing this on board." We' re not anti-alcohol. We've got some concerns and we've got some hurdles to overcome, but isn't insurmountable. We should be looking at these concerns but we're not anti -alcohol. Nobody on the council is. A lot of that was just driven by particular interests. â&#x20AC;˘

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM


SPORTSBALL

PHOTOS BY JESSICA SID

BY DAN O'BRIEN

ON THE TOWN

THE WEATHER REPORT

It seems only fair that we talk about the weather for a moment. Some of the greatest games in NFL history were played with inclement weather as the sonorous singer of the gridiron. This week started out with a lackluster and rain-drenched drop-fest that culminated in the Patriots limping to a win over the confused -looking Jets behind a restrained Rex Ryan. I imagine it is because each dropped pass and loss is another stroke on the wall prophesizing his departure from the mean machine from New York. This would not be the only game inundated by weather this work week for the ridiculously paid. The Saints continued their divisional dominance despite a weather delay. Sunday night was equally as afflicted, succumbing to an hour delay before the 49ers' lopsided offense was revealed by an aggressive and playoffready Sea hawks squad-that even staunch Pete Carroll haters have to recognize as dominant in their thrashing of the red and gold. What was once the laughingstock of the NFC has become the best rivalry in the league: two overlooked quarterbacks have emerged as superstars, and a tremendous defense whose members are known only to those who lurk the deep dungeons of fantasy leagues with defensive players ranked as highly as offensive threats. The battle of brothers-Manning Bowl Part Three-was yet another victory for big brother (and he of the nervous, shuffling feet in the pocket) Peyton Manning. The Giants looked, well, terrible. Not we -are-starting-out-the-

season-slow-but-are-going-to -make-theplayoffs-slow, but like a team that might not break .500 before the season's end. For Raiders fans-and I know there are a lot of you here in northern Californiacongratulations : You beat up the worst team in the league. Good luck next week. Shifting sports, the most interesting bit of news came from the reigning NBA champs : the Miami Heat. Calm down, and pick up the paper. I realize that mentioning any team that boasts LeBron James and repeat championships is going to draw ire from all corners of the basketball world. Michael Beasley, a two time dud since being traded away from Miami to make room for LeBron, joined other off-season project Greg Oden, among the pieces meant to lift the Miami Heat to the coveted three -peat. What is most staggering about this pick-up is that when combined with the acquisition of Oden, it creates a strange blueprint for success in an Eastern conference that saw an embattled Heat squad beat-up something fierce in the interior. Oden, while a capable college star and someone with enormous possibility, has the distinction of missing more games than he has played. Beasley, while not plagued by the injury bug, has been riddled with offthe- court issues that make him another gamble like Chris Anderson was last season. I suppose Heat fans are hoping that these two lotto tickets end up paying out like Anderson did for them. Oh yeah, the Warriors got better. Stay frosty. â&#x20AC;˘

FACEBOOK.COM/SYNTHESISCHICO â&#x20AC;˘ SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

SEPTEMBER 23 - SE PTE MBER 29, 2013

17


ON THE TOWN

PHOTOS BY VINCE LANTHAM FACE BOOK.COM/VANGUARD.PHOTOGRAPHY

HOWL HOWLMOVESMOUNTAINS.TUMBLR.COM

A BABY RAPTOR I flung myself through my bedroom door, shut it behind me, and sat on the floor. From here I began talking, half to myself, half to my cockatiel "Bird," in his cage across from me. (I don't normally carry on conversations from across entire rooms, but Bird always speaks very loudly, and today I was speaking with some volume myself.) "What a day, Bird! And what a show Ma Muse put on! You should've seen how perfectly content everyone was. And the weather could not have been better, I think." I was playing with a small wooden box as I spoke, sliding it side to side. "But you know, Bird, it was almost too perfect of a day-certainly too pleasant and bland to be worth talking about to anyone else (besides you Bird, of course) ... Oh! But what is that?!" Here I was interrupted, as a scratching sound was heard coming from inside the box (which, come to think of it, had no reason for being in my room at all-at least, no reason I could think of). I opened the lid and saw, with an acute mixture of horror and delight, a baby Velociraptor! "How on Earth did you get here?!" I exclaimed. Held in my hand, it fit soundly in the palm. "But you won't fit there for very long, I'll wager -I've seen the moving pictures, and you're going to get quite large before too long. Ow!" I shifted the little monster so it was held between thumb and forefinger, to keep its claws from reaching. "I don't suppose you can tell me what you eat at your age ... Well, here, I can see a cricket that's escaped from Rosie!" (Rosie is one of my tarantulas, you see.) I set the baby raptor where he could see the insect, and ZOOM! went the reptile after his meal, quite faster than any pet I've had, so that he and the cricket both went skidding along the length of my hardwood floor.

don't keep you forever, you'll need somewhere more secure than this box ... but where? This cage already has four snakes and a tarantula ... This cage has Bird in it, and he's very jealous of his space ... Oh! How'd you get in there?" I stopped to rescue a baby snake who'd gotten tangled in a mess of videogame cords, and dropped him in a third small cage that already held a baby spider. "Oh, why can't I just say 'no' to all the babies people give me?" I said, to no one in particular. "They' re starting to become more like chores than gifts. Well, how was it, Baby Raptor?" The reptile clicked its claw on the ground in response, chewing its food, surveying the room for more treats. â&#x20AC;˘

Considering him diverted for the moment (almost like a cat he was, playing with and chasing his food up and down and everywhere), I set about looking for a place to keep him. "Even if I

18

SEPT EM BER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29 , 201 3

SYN TH ESI SW EEKLY.COM


OFF MY LAWN! BY JAMIE O'NEILL - JAMIEANDKARENONEILL@GMAIL.COM

PHOTOS BY VINCE LANTHAM FACEBOOK.COM/VANGUARD.PHOTOGRAPHY

ON THE TOWN

AN EVEN DOZEN SIGNS WE'RE ALL NUTS 12. Bradley Manning is in jail ; Dick Cheney is not.

11. The six Wal-Mart heirs possess more wealth than the bottom 40% of families in this country. Or, in other words, six surrealistically-rich people who say they can't provide decent wages or benefits for their workers have more wealth than roughly 160 million other Americans combined. Much of that Wal-Mart wealth is directly attributable to the ways U.S. taxpayers subsidize the WalMart labor pool, offer tax breaks, and tilt the playing field so that so much wealth flows into those few hands. Six people. Think about that, if your own head isn't too far up your nether orifice, then think of the people and policies that created such disparity. 10. Michelle Bachmann is on the House Intelligence Committee. 9. The highest-paid public employees in 26 states are college football coaches. 8. Rush Limbaugh has a net worth of nearly a half a billion bucks, and he is the most Iistened-to ignora nee-and-hate-purveyor in the nation, with some 15 million regular listeners. He has two semesters of college under his rather lengthy belt, and according to his mother, he "flunked everything." 7. College grads in 2011 left college with an average debt load of $26,000 apiece. That figure has gone up since then. 6. Justin Bieber made $55 million in 2012. 5. Doug La Malta, Louie Gohmert, Mike Spence, and Darrell Issa all serve or have served in the U.S. House of Representatives, and if you don't know why those elected representatives constitute an example of our having our heads up our asses, then you've probably got yours up yours. 4. The news media actually cover things Donald Trump says. 3. According to the Department of Veteran's Affairs, veterans of the U.S. military are killing themselves at the rate of nearly one per hour. Among American teenagers, suicide

is the third-leading cause of death, right behind homicide and accidents. 2. House Republicans have held more than 40 votes to repeal the Affordable Care Act, but have not proposed a single bill to create jobs.

1. On the morning I was compiling this list, 13 people were shot to death in the nation's capital. Since terrorists struck the U.S. on 9/11/2001, more than 300,000 Americans have lost their lives to guns-more than 100 times as many people as the number who died when the World Trade Center fell. We've spent well over a trillion dollars fighting terrorism, but we live with the threat of random terror in our schools and on our streets on any given day. That's just the price we pay for "freedom," I guess. Or so the NRA would have us believe, as they corrupt our politicians and subvert popular support for gun control sanity. â&#x20AC;˘

FACEBOOK.COM/SYNTHESISCHICO â&#x20AC;˘ SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

SE PTEMBER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29, 2013

19


ON THE TOWN

SEXYTIMES PHOTOS BY JESSICA SID

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Is it okay to also snuggle/pet your kitty while your guy is petting YOUR kitty? There is so much wrong with this I don't know where to begin. You either have the world's most boring and comatose cat, or your man is the worst at working a vagina. ONE of those kitties should be squirming to the point of losing control. If he is doin' stuff to you and you ' re still able to concentrate on and hold a cat, he's awful at his job. That cat should be freaked the fuck out and running for cover because you're unable to hold still. Place the focus in the room on one kitty at a time. What's the optimal position in a sedan-size car so I don't get bruises from bumping into various things? Inquiring minds want to know! For reference, "sedan-size" includes makes like Ford Fusion, Chevy Malibu, Toyota Camry. Speaking from experience, I find the limitations are more on the people than the space. If one of you is larger, or less flexible, the options dwindle to pretty much back-seat-only. In the back seat you can go at it much the same as a living room sofa. However, I am under 6' and my best luck has been had with fully reclining and scooting back the passenger seat. The lady may place her feet on the dash and guy-ontop can easily use the space to take care of business. Remember, if your man is hulky

20

SEPTEMBER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29, 2013

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or either of you is on the plumper side, this just won't work. I have folded the back seat down and used it in conjunction with the access space to the trunk, but I don't suggest this unless you ' re into some freaky kidnapping-fantasy shit. Thinking larger-if you have access to an SUV or Cadillac Coupe de Ville, you'll avoid most bruising. Why are you having car sex anyway? You live with your mother or something? Dear Balls, I met these two guys a few weeks ago. One of them was really cute, but the other one asked for my number. After about a week we had started sexting, but then it dropped off. Then yesterday his hot friend texted me and it started getting kind of frisky too. The weird part is, about 10 minutes into that, the first guy suddenly sent me some dirty texts. I feel sort of awkward flirting with both of them, but it makes me feel good to get so much attention and I can't seem to stop. It is my duty to inform you that both of these clowns were seated next to each other on the same damn couch and highfiving each other at your expense.

Pouring one out for Frank Riley. RIP. -Balls McPhearson

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM


SCENE REPORT

TOM RIGNEY AND PAUL THORN: A DOUBLE DOSE OF PUREDEE PLEASURE BY JAIME O'NEILL

PRODUCT REVIEW INSTANT POT BY SARA CALVOSA Do you like it when your pots do fancy things? Do you bite your nails and pace your kitchen wondering whether or not to use your pressure cooker at the last minute, or to let something simmer unsupervised, hoping it won't burn or blow up or congeal into a goo while you're away at work all day? Well, decisions are hard, but at least there's one pot that will do both slow and fast cooking. But not at the same time, because that's some H.G. Wells shit right there. I was searching Amazon for the world's best crackpot to simmer some breakfast meat while I sleep.

I've got 500 words to render a "scene report," and that's going to be challenge. Last Monday, on my way to see Paul Thorn at the Sierra Nevada Big Room, I stopped off to meet Tom Rigney, singer and fiddler extraordinaire. Tom and his band, Flambeau, set Laxson Hall on fire the previous Saturday as part of Chico Performances' annual World Music Fest. Rigney hung around Chico for a few days after that bravura Saturday gig, staying with local musician and videographer Peter Berkow. Berkow is mixing a Tom Rigney concert for a PBS special to be aired next year, and I was invited to see a little of how that was being done. Rigney's a charmer and a musician, right down to his trademark red boots. He's been touring for more than three decades, and those lucky enough to have seem him at the two Chico shows know full well just how damn good he is. When Rigney headed home to Sonoma County, I headed over to see Paul Thorn. I've seen him play on three previous occasions, so I knew I was in for a good time. Thorn, a former pro boxer, is one of those southern charmers who could persuade a cat to fetch the paper. I've done something like eleventyzillion interviews with musicians, freelancing pieces to a) earn some change so small that chumps would be too proud to take it, and b) to get press passes so I can hear live

music for free. Most of those interviews quickly faded from memory, but I remember a Paul Thorn interview I did a couple years ago because the guy is just so natural, unaffected, and entirely authentic. He'd been on tour, opening for a country musician generally known to be a right-wing asshole, so I asked Paul if the guy was as much of an asshole as he seemed. Usually, celebrities dodge that kind of question the way Mitt Romney dodges taxes, but Paul Thorn replied instantly, saying, "yeah, he is." Thorn speaks in a Mississippi-molasses accent, and his story/songs are rich in humor, pathos, and good-ol'-boy wisdom. He took the Big Room stage on crutches, having sprained his ankle the week before. He performed all but his encore while seated, though he's been known to hop down from the bandstand to dance with the patrons. "I like watch in' y'all dance," he said. "The girls look so sexy and natural, but you guys mostly look like you've just been tasered, or like you're trying to kill a roach." So that's 470 words, and I haven't even gotten to how good Thorn's lead guitarist was, or how funny his songs can be, or how much the women all loved him, and how easy it was for us guys to see why they do. Next time he swings through town, you're just going to have to go see for yourself. You'll be damn fool if you miss him again. •

FACEBOOK.COM/SYNTHESISCHICO • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

Because I've recently discovered I have an allergy to eggs, I now need to readjust my idea of acceptable breakfast foods (according to my hero Sarah Fragoso). Unfortunately, eggs are the nation's appointed goto breakfast protein, so I have to eat dinner for breakfast unless I want a day filled with gut-wrenching pain and diarrhea-or conversely, starvation. I hate diarrhea and I hate starving, so lnstantPot to the rescue! I used to have a ban on crackpots, but I can't for the life of me remember why. Not remembering why I boycotted them is convenient, because now I really need one. I went to my trusty buddy, amazon.com, to find the world's best slow cooker, and to read all the hilarious reviews about how crackpots either failed consumers or were the best thing ever. That is where I found this holy grail of kitchen appliances. It was a little 'spencer, but can you really put a price on not having gut-wrenching diarrhea or starvation? That's how I explained it to Matt, who does not have an egg allergy, but who does in fact also hate diarrhea and starvation. So here's the deal with the lnstantPot: It's made in Canada I think, by Canadians. Or possibly it's made in China and just touted as a trusty Canadian product. Everybody trusts Canadians; they never lie, so either way that's a great marketing strategy. There are lots of buttons and pre-programmed options on the face of lnstantPot and the hardware is stainless steel. No poisonous teflon or Paula Deen butter-coating technology anywhere. There are videos on

lnstantPot

www.instantpot.com List price: $219 the lnstantPot website that pretty much tell you everything you need to know about how to use lnstantPot, but it's also self-explanatory. If you want to slow-cook something, just push the slow-cook button and tell the lnstantPot how long you would like to cook the shit out of some breakfast meat. Pressure cooking is just as easy, and I assume it's safer because Canadians are paragons of safety. lnstantPot is amazing because it also has several modes for browning/stir-frying, steaming (it comes with a vegetable steamer), rice cooking, and babysitting. Just kidding-it won't watch your rotten kids. But you could sell like five kitchen appliances at a yard sale and replace them all with one lnstantPot. Here's a recipe for breakfast meat that can be made in either a pressure cooker, or a slow cooker, or in one lnstantPot: Get some meat: 2 lbs. pork shoulder, or chicken breasts, or whatever meat you like. Get some fruit and other ingredients: 2 apples, cored and sliced (blueberries, peaches, and plums are also good, but NOT BANANAS.) 1 onion, sliced 1 cup stock/broth OR water 1 tablespoon honey 2 tablespoons freshly grated ginger 1 teaspoon cinnamon 1 teaspoon salt Y, teaspoon smoked paprika Y, teaspoon pepper 2 garlic cloves, peeled and smashed

Put everybody in the pool before you go to bed and slow-cook for 8-10 hours on low. Or get up early and pressure-cook that business for 30 minutes. Throw your meat on top of some salad and have breakfast! •

SE PTEMBER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29, 2013

21


s

H

SEPTEMBER 23 - SEPTEMBER 29, 2013 BY KOZ MCKEV

AQUARIUS

ARIES

GEMINI

LEO

LIBRA

SAGITTARIUS

Dissolve all past notions of

There is a sense of expansive-

It's a lovely day in the neigh-

It is officially your season. You

You begin to be freed up from

You've been waiting for this time

who you think you are. Learn

ness. Growth is occurring on all

borhood. Be more active in

are now the flavor of the month.

your career or life responsibili-

of year. You feel ready to explore

to be more childlike and fresh

levels. The things we do with

your local environment. Seek

New beginnings are likely to

ties. This is a good time to meet

and travel. There is no such thing

in your approach to creativity.

love are more powerful than the

like-minded people to hang out

be initiated. Financially, things

helpful people who can shed

as "everyday life." Every day

Partnerships issues deepen. You

things we do because of obliga-

with. Honor your siblings and

are changing for the positive.

some light on your situation.

has an exotic experience. You'll

may find yourself responsible

tion. What are you creatively

friends from the past. Pay more

Be aware of good investment

This is also a good time to

hear a new sound, smell a new

for other people's property. You

motivated to do? How are things

attention to your communiques.

opportunities. Take care of your

prepare for the future. A bit of

scent, taste a new flavor, feel a

may also find yourself deeper

with your children, or with your

The moon will be in Leo on

neck and lower-jaw issues. Find

karma has been building up

wonderful sensation, or see a

in lust. Be a team player: fair in

creative projects? Getting over

Sunday. This could be a good day

an uplifting spiritual song to sing.

in your life. What you think is

beautiful sight. You command

every way. Use diplomacy and

this hurdle will take work as well

for a party or a gathering. Let go

Take on challenges and respond

secret may actually be public

more authority than usual today.

compromise. Learn to trust your

as concentration. The moon will

of the values and material items

to conflicts with ease and grace.

knowledge. Do something good

It seems that you know what

intuition more.

be in Gemini on Tuesday through

that no longer suit you. Enjoy

Thursday morning. Be motivated

cultivating talents that require

in the best ways possible.

working with your hands.

TAURUS

CANCER

VIRGO

SCORPIO

CAPRICORN

PISCES

You begin the week on a strong

Comfort may need to be

It's time to put on a new face,

The places your heart has taken

You're in a good position, so

Once beyond the negotiation

and/or leave town on Sunday.

you want and you know how to get it.

note Monday with the moon in

sacrificed for curiosity. You 're

and to find a voice for yourself.

you have their own karma.

don't blow it. The needs of your

stage of romance, we realize that

Taurus . The sun is transiting your

in a place where it's important

You've had several weeks of

Interpersonal relationship

friends seem to be a priority of

we are in deep water with the

sixth house of employment,

to acknowledge feelings, as

clear thinking. At this point it

themes are common this week.

some sort. Do as much as you

other person. Someone may put

service work, and charitable

hiding one's head in the sand

will be easier to be swayed by

By Thursday afternoon, the wind

can on Monday because as the

you in charge of their property while they do other things. Others

causes. Pay attention to your

like an ostrich may not be the

the needs of others. Flow with

fills your sails and you become

week rolls on, more and more

stress level, as more is being

best choice. The moon will be

grace. Money-making oppor-

motivated by your friends' good

things will require your atten-

may ask you if they can borrow

demanded of you this week.

in Cancer Thursday afternoon

tunities are more easily found.

deeds. Your quest is to show

tion. Career and public image

your stuff. Make sure that they

The weekend looks good for

through Saturday. Making others

What you spend your money

intelligence and maturity, along

are important themes right now.

are responsible enough to pay

hanging out with family. Venus,

feel comfortable will help you feel

on reflects your values. The

with a sense of love and grace.

Hang out with the kind of people

for whatever they might break.

Mercury and Saturn will be in

better about the whole situation.

weekend is good for socializing,

You may feel isolated, yet you

who motivate you to do good

Otherwise, don't be too attached

your seventh house. It's time to

as well as resting and retreating

may be having the time of your

things. Romance and negotia-

to your material stuff. Travel and

improve relationship issues on

from the struggles of the world.

life in your love nest.

tions occur over the weekend.

adventure are other options you

every level.

Communication gets easier.

might take.

HAPPY BIRTHDAV Clalie Fong 9/28/82, Scott Barwk:k 9/29/72, Teresa Markwood 9/2:?"67 Koz McKev 1s on You Tube, on cable 11BCTV,1s heard on 90/FM KZFR Chk:o, and also available by appoli1tment for personal horoscopes. Call (530)891-5147 or e-ma!I kozmk:kev@sunsetne t

GREAT AUTUMN READ Winter Melon, written by local writer Bill Wong Foey A defiant and passionate young woman survives the Rape of Nanking in this debut novel. Voted Book of the Month for July by Lyons Books "Lives of Asia" book group.

FE I

In paperback online at Amazon.com and Lyons Book Store, 135 Main Street, or as an e-book from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Apple iTunes and DirectMusicCafe. ADVERTISMENT

22

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The Amazing Race | Caper Acres Chain Gang | Sexytimes | New Columns!

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