De-Teching

By Rachel Hore, Dean Park, NSW.

Rachel asked herself whether her smart phone was really making her happy, and has found multiple benefits to doing without it.

‘Mum, I want a phone!’ my eldest girl stated. A moment I had been dreading. I knew it was coming. As a teenager I had also begged and pleaded with my mother for a phone. I listed all the reasons my daughter couldn’t have one. She was too young; it would stifle her natural creativity and she would become addicted.

‘But Mum, you have a phone, and you use it… quite a lot.’

I had become aware that over the pandemic my smartphone had become a crutch. I hate being a hypocrite. I had recently been reading and listening about people who were ‘de-teching’; getting rid of their smartphone and re-finding themselves. I felt like it was about time for me to do something similar. There are, however, challenges, to giving up your smartphone in the modern world. Our lives have become so intertwined with technology that it becomes quite a process to disengage.

It was difficult, I still haven’t entirely conquered it, but here are some of the obstacles I faced and solutions I have found for them.

C Ommunication

I had given up social media before this, when I became disheartened with the shallowness of it all and chasing likes and hearts. I wanted a more solid foundation for friendships and a more meaningful relationship with family.

One activity I started doing was writing letters again. It was a great feeling to put pen to paper and share all the news with my family members. My children have also joined in and my four-year-old writes letters in her little beginning writing and then I ask her what it says and interpret the message for the person. My family have become really involved in this, and we get lots of letters back with little drawings and family stories which we can keep and treasure always.

I also seek out the company of other mums at library events and church groups. Having recently moved I am still making friends, but it sometimes just feels comforting to be in the space of other mums.

Finding i n F ormation

This was the thing I enjoyed the most about the smartphone. It was like having the information of the world at your fingertips.

Without the phone, I went back to my original love, the library. Giving up my smartphone provided more time to read. I am devouring nonfiction (I loved history) and fiction at the rate I did when I was younger. I had made the excuse to myself that as a busy mum I just didn’t have the time, but that wasn’t the case. It was whenever I had free time I was scanning on my phone. Now my free time is taken up reading and jotting notes in my diary for things to try later.

Be Pre P ared to d ea L wit H s tu FF

I mentioned before that I had been using the smartphone as a crutch and that was the case. Once I gave it up, all the emotions that I had been holding back began to resurface. Feelings about the pandemic and anxieties about the future were no longer being suppressed. I had to find other ways to deal with my feelings of anxiety and sadness. It is hard to be physically present all the time when you have spent so much time immersing yourself in an online world.

Whenever my feelings started overwhelming me, I would go outside in the garden, without shoes and just feel the earth under my feet and the sky overhead. I would plan a trip out with my family and walk one of the trails near my home.

Recently I grew some corn, and I found it helpful to go outside and listen to the rustling sound it made as the wind blew. I became more aware of mother nature and her calming, soothing ability and allowed myself to fully enter the experience.

Finding y our way a round

Not having a smart phone with a handy online map has been a learning experience for me. Being in Sydney means that having a smartphone can be vitally important to find my way to some areas. I have decided to mainly stick locally or go to places which I can learn by route. For someone who used to love to drive and explore all over it has been difficult for me, but has also helped me appreciate and explore interesting places in my local suburb that I might not have discovered earlier. We are lucky enough to have playgrounds, a little corner store and many walking trails nearby. What else as a family do I need? Pioneers didn’t very often leave their homestead except for trading purposes. I think a lot can be learned about our needs versus actual wants by how people used to live.

tH e r econnect

I found being always mentally present with my family very reward- ing. I enjoy playing boardgames and cards with them and the funny, little insightful comments they make. I enjoy getting to know about their hopes and dreams as we go on walks together and chat about our day. I like to sing songs and listen to the radio as I get my chores done and play toys with my littlest ones.

I feel more at peace with myself and less stressed as I am not being bombarded with bad news all day. Instead, I can curl up with a drink, and my Grass Roots magazine and enjoy reading the articles and the letters in Feedback and feel a part of the greater community. I feel closer to becoming a whole person again and I can be content that I am modelling behaviour that hopefully my children will take on board. T