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NERVE
DECEMBER13
WHO’S ON BOARD? Editor Joshua Iredale
editor@nervemedia.org.uk
Features Editor Wil Oxford Alys Penfold (sub) features@nervemedia.org.uk
Fashion Editor Shannon Hards Jade Jannotti (sub) Sarah Mckelvey (sub) fashion@nervemedia.org.uk
Sport Editor Craig Rodhouse Tom Bennett (sub) Ash Hover (sub) Andrea Avellano (sub) sport@nervemedia.org.uk
Entertainment Editor Abigail Payne-Humphries James Hibberd (sub) ents@nervemedia.org.uk
Comment Editor Natalie Taylor comment@nervemedia.org.uk
Got it COVERED P17
Check what we’ve got for you this month...
NERVE AWARDS Put on your best dinner suit and be prepared for plenty of glitz and glam as we recognise the best of 2013, as well as giving you the opportunity to tell us what made this year for you. Champagne not included.
Online Editor Katie Roberts online@nervemedia.org.uk
Subbing Anushka Naidoo Abbi Hayden Advertising Georgia Martin susales@bournemouth.ac.uk 01202 961461
Media Coordinator Joe Tattersall sunerve@bournemouth.ac.uk 01202 961681
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FALL FASHION FIXES
The Autumn/Winter 2013 season is now in full swing, which has given our fashion monkeys plenty of time to scan the trends, finding out what’s hot in these cold months.
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PIGEON DETECTIVES
Who would have thought they’ve been around for 10 years?! We speak to Ryan from the band about being on the road once again.
Wanna Join?
For opportunities to get involved, whether it be writing, design, illustration, photography or even a spot of photobombing, email editor@nervemedia.org.uk for details.
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ALICE IN BOURNEMOUTH
Imagine living your childhood dream everyday at work. Well, this is exactly what Nicki Grainger did, when she set up her very own vintage shop, What Alice Found.
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DARTS CHAMPIONSHIPS The most important time in the dart’s calender is fast approaching. We look at the players who are hotly tipped to be in the running for the top share of prize money.
THE SEASONAL SESSIONS PART TWO
THE XMAS HAT PARTY
11TH DECEMBER - THE OLD FIRE STATION CRACKER CROWN * REINDEER ANTLERS * CLASSIC BOBBLE
ENTRY ON THE DOOR
2 - 3 AFTER 11:30
INDIE * ROCK * XMAS CLASSICS * RETRO
£1.50 DRINKS
/ MILKBOURNEMOUTHOFFICIAL
@MILKBOURNEMOUTH
NERVE
DECEMBER13
Contributors
Writers Aliyah Allen Sophie Boyland Adam Worsley Joanne Ball Scarlett Dixon Lewis Treleaven Mallory Mabe Sophie Boyden Tom Beasley Charlotte Gay Eva-Maria Maierhofer Georgia Reed Design Team Becca Whitmore Katherine Dove Steph Bradshaw Lucy Figiel Alice Tayler Rachel Burke Pamela Odumusi Gaby Rock
Word From Your Editor
It’s quite weird this issue; I don’t have to send the magazine off to be printed, I am just clicking a button and it’s there in your hands. I hope you enjoy it; you will be getting the same great stuff you have (hopefully) grown to love, but it will be packed full of exciting links to keep your mouse happy (or fingers for you tablet types!) As 2013 comes to an end, we thought it was only fair to get all the best bits together and decide what the highlights of the year were, in our very own Nerve Awards. We want you to get involved, and let us know if you agree or disagree with our choices. We also spoke to Pigeon Detectives about their latest tour, and how they’re still getting
Illustrators Grant Corlett Laurence Thomas Charlotte Gay Alice Kirkham Nathan Hackett Jack Carrington
Keep Up facebook.com/nervemagazine twitter.com/nervemagazine www.nervemedia.org.uk
Important Stuff
a kick from gigging. We look at the contenders for the World Darts Championships, as well as a chat with AFC Bournemouth’s Brett Pitman. You could also check out our look at the Million Mask March for an eye-opening read into the faceless protests in London. Of course we have all our regulars, as well as a few christmas treats thrown in, including a look at this year’s Christmas Adverts and Party Fashion. All that’s left is to wish all our readers a very Merry Christmas and an awesome New Year. Make the most of the parties over the festive season, and if you’re needing some relief after a tough day of revision, we’re only a click away! Joshua Iredale
The Full Line Up
REGULARS
SPORT
06 Mix Tape
48 Sport Blogging
08 Heads Up
50 Sports Personality of the Year
09 Winners/Losers
52 Poole Pirates
30 Through the Lens
54 Brett Pitman
61 Top 5
56 Darts
ENTERTAINMENT 10 Holidays are Coming
59 Varsity
FASHION
Here at SUBU, when we print Nerve Magazine, we print on 100% recycled paper using vegetable - based inks by Indigo Press Limited. You’ve got to start somewhere.
16 Future of the Left
12 Fall Fashion Fixes
17 Nerve Awards
28 Blog Diaries
26 Pigeon Detectives
29 Blogging SOS
36 Christmas Gifts SOS
32 Vintage Fashion Fair
Nerve Magazine is produced by SUBU (the Students Union @ Bournemouth University). Information correct at time of publication (December 2013). The views expressed are not necessarily those of Nerve Media, SUBU or the Editor.
40 Reviewed
44 Style Clash
Nerve Magazine is usually printed on 200 gsm silk cover and 115gsm body provided by Indigo Printing Press.
FEATURES 24 Million Mask March 39 Mad About Bridget
48 Party Time!
COMMENT 37 Why I Hate Christmas
42 Alice in Wonderland
NERVE | 5
Essential TRACKS we’ve been listening to this MONTH
SHY NATURE DEADLY SIN Deadly Sin has everything a great indie pop track could ever need. Driving drums, energetic guitar riffs and let’s not forget a ridiculously catchy chorus, this mood booster captures an early Two Door Cinema Club vibe. Crank up the volume on this tune to beat away any impending winter blues that might be on the horizon.
FEBUEDER ALLIGATOR
Credit: Tony Jupp
andre Garneau
The latest release from this Brighton pair is a more confident and controlled effort than ever, which still manages to maintain their refreshing, hand-clap-drum- beat future-pop charm. It’s the kind of spine-tingling stuff that lets you know Iyes are subtly upping their game.
Credit: Pierre-Alex
IYES SHE
The Ascot-based trio seem to create an Alt-J-esque weirdpop, Alligator is an immersive, swampy venture through unnerving echoes and tinny percussion samples. Ricochets of weird, nasal vocals, unexpected shouty bursts and erratic drum clacks – for fans of Animal Collective, Wild Beasts and Glass Animals.
JUNGLE LUCKY I GOT WHAT I WANT First releases Platoon and Drops took a pinch of that Child of Love-esque nu-soul, weaving it with electronic synth freak-outs and eerie, unnerving flutters of found-sound to create this weirdly euphoric dystopian niche. This fourth instalment is set for release on Chess Club later this month. Chet Faker-ish undertones ride over brimming electronic soundscapes, finger clicks and pulsing computerized samples - another tiny glimpse into their vibrant, chaotic Jungle of thoughts.
MORCHEEBA MAKE BELIEVER This tune is 100% positive vibes. Sit back, have a kitkat, and let Morcheeba in. The trip-hop trio have been operating outside the proverbial music box since 1995, and this month they came back with this roots influenced chiller, complete with a naughtily hooky chorus to wet your appetites. Have a goosey.
SEATTLE YACHT CLUB SAME OLD QUESTIONS
PAT GROSSI FEAT. ELLIE GOULDING SILHOUETTE Electronic artist Pat Grossi creates a track so smooth and rich it oozes ambience. From his new EP Rapor, this collaboration is a pedestal for Active Child’s impeccable production skills to shine. Musically understated, Silhouette is a powerful duet enhancing both Grossi and Goulding’s enchantingly beautiful vocals in a way which makes for undeniably captivating listen.
Head straight to the playlist by scanning the QR code or visit www.nervemedia.org.uk
Missing that summer feeling? Bathe in bright vocals, fan yourself with airy synth pop, add some great rhythms and your music holiday is complete in the form of SYC’s Same Old Questions. Listening to this song will awaken the feeling of a warm sea breeze on your skin and the taste of a cocktail on your tongue. Seattle Yacht Club have done it right!
LITTLE MIX MOVE An edgy song with a strong beat, Little Mix’s newest single Move is a unique sound from the X Factor winners, demonstrating their versatility brilliantly. It’s less ‘schoolgirl pop’ than their previous music, with an electro vibe, but generally a real ear pleaser and a quality tune to groove along to before a night out.
HEADS UP!
YOUR MONTH IN BOURNEMOUTH
UNION J @BIC 22 December
CLUBBING
GIGS
EVENTS
Old Firestation 12 December
O2 Academy 3 December
BIC 4 December - 23 February
O2 Academy 5 December
BIC 7 December
O2 Academy 7 December
Bournemouth Pavilion 8 December
Old Firestation 11 December
Bournemouth Pavilion 7 December - 5 January
60 Million Postcards 12 December
Old Firestation 5 December
BIC 16 December
Pavilion Dance 5 December
One Love
Huxley (We Are Your Friends) Old Firestation 7 December
Will Saul
Orange Rooms 6 December
Rudimental DJ O2 Academy 30 November
Garage Nation O2 Academy 21 December
Shy FX
Cameo 10 December
Christmas Eve Party 60 Million Postcards 24 December
Flux Pavilion Happy Mondays Tenacious D Electric Six Velcro Hooks The Prodigy JLS
BIC 17 December
Union J
BIC 22 December NERVE | 8
Cool Coast Ice Rink Diversity
Stephen K. Amos Aladdin
Expect some serious dropping of bass. Flux Pavilion @ O2 Academy, 3 December
Comedy Nation Chelsea Hotel
That’ll Be The Day Christmas Show BIC 21 December He’s a DJ, and he’s at a club. Will Saul @ Orange Rooms, 6 December
eminem games consoles It’s a Big month for the gaming world and gamers themselves, as we are introduced to the fourth generation of gaming consoles. Microsoft’s Xbox One and Sony’s PS4 were released this month headto-head and over a million units have been sold already, with the PS4 takinga huge lead in sales in the UK!
Thirteen years after releasing the first Marshall Mathers LP (that went on to sell over 28 million copies around the world), he is on top again going number one along with another collab featuring Rihanna, Monster, hitting top of the charts! Will the Real Slim Shady please stand up?
Mcbusted Two 2004 sensations have joined forces with a massive tour around the UK. Best friends McFly and Busted have had some of the biggest hits of the 2000s such as Air Hostess and Five Colours in Her Hair- you cannot deny that this will be a match made in heaven!
WINNERS
LOSERS MONTH OF THIS
DAPPY N Dubz troublemaker Dappy faced a night in hospital this month, after being kicked in the face by a horse. He also apparently fancies himself as a ‘Lord of the Manor’. Well, if that means spending less time making music then quite frankly, we’re all for it.
england cricket Winning the last three Ashes series and going down under favourites with a lot of confidence should had boded well for the nation. However, slumping to an embarrassing defeat at the Gabba and losing Jonathon Trott, are the bails coming off England’s stumps?
professor green Professor Green is not having a good month. The 29-year-old rapper, also known as Stephen Manderson, has been arrested twice in one month. The first time being on suspicion of drink-driving, after officers spotted a Mercedes had collided with a van in early November. The second was for allegedly perverting the court of justice. Hopefully his luck will turn around soon.
NERVE | 9
ENTS
This year’s Christmas adverts seem to be on a different level, seemingly going to great lengths to outdo each other. We look at this season’s selection, and may have shed a tear at some
F
irst up is Marks and Spencer’s Alice in Wonderland themed extravaganza. This was an interesting one, as it embodies different fairytales such as Alice in Wonderland with the Wizard of Oz and made it all festive- like. British model Rosie Huntington- Whiteley played the role of Alice who bizarrely kept losing her clothes (never remembered that in Alice and Wonderland). She is seen running and then subsequently falling down a pot hole after chasing a white dog through the street, only to find herself at an eery dinner party, with Mr David Gandy (the mad hatter) at the head of the table (ladies, that one was for us). There was a lovely surprise appearance from Helena Bonham Carter as the Wizard, who told Rosie that she had "nice shoes", even though I expected and (slightly hoped) for her to say something mean. This was a nice advert, despite rewinding it back to David Gandy every ten seconds, but it embraced the festive spirit with lots of ‘magic and sparkle’. Next up is Morrison’s advert starring Britain’s favourite duo, Ant and Dec. They are surrounded by a table of food, watching a gingerbread man perform a Morrison infested version of Beauty and the Beasts’ Be My Guest. It tragically ends with Dec about to grab and eat the gingerbread man, egged on by Ant who says, "Go on" NERVE | 10
it’s Christmas". Even with the amount of snow (flour), glitter and play dough chefs that this has, it doesn’t quite make it as good as some of the others. I only really watched this to see the mischief Ant and Dec would get up to. All I kept thinking at the end, was where all that food was going to end up. Last but certainly not least, is the well anticipated John Lewis Christmas advert. Other adverts in previous years from John Lewis have tugged on our heart strings; the little boy desperately waiting to give his mum and dad their Christmas present, or even a snowman travelling to a high street (not that anyone found that peculiar) to buy his snow-woman wife a pair of gloves, a scarf and a hat. However this one was very different, because it is animated this time (ooh get them), having a disney- esque feel to it. Titled "The Bear and the Hare", this advert tells of a sweet story of a sad Hare wanting the Bear to embrace the Christmas spirit, but Words Aliyah Allen knowing that
it will hibernate for Winter and miss the celebrations. So the Hare gives the Bear and alarm clock as a present (how on earth did it wrap that), and the Bear finally enjoys Christmas for the first time. Aw. Accompanying the tale, is a lovely acoustic version of Keane’s "Somewhere Only We Know" by Lily Allen, which gives such lovely, warm feeling for the watcher; probably a ploy by John lewis to make you cry like a five year old. Which one’s your favourite? Or does nothing get better than the chants and echoes of "the holidays are coming" in the classic CocaCola advert?
Illustrations Charlotte Gay
Fall Fashion Fixes AW13 trends are sure to get you the attention you want. And this year, with such a range available, there’s sure to be something for everyone. The big question is, is pink the new black? Words Sophie Boyland
T
his year pink is set to brighten up your dull days in December. Whether it’s in your face fuchsia or barely there baby pink, every girl needs this colour in their wardrobe. On the Burberry runway, a normally rather tomboy, Cara Delevingne walked in a demure pink ensemble. On the other side of the cat walk Marc Jacobs showcased a collection of pink, oversized, woollen coats. Oversized outerwear is also a big win this season, especially if you can find a piece in your perfect shade of pink. Fashion forward duo Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, are pioneers of the oversized look and were both seen sporting vintage looks recently at a movie premiere in New York.
Credit: New Look
Credit: Zara
Tartan me up The iconic pattern has hit the rails with a big impact yet again. Whether it’s skirts, coats or even tights, everybody needs a bit of tartan in their life and wardrobe. The beauty about this pattern is that it is so diverse there will be something there for all of you. Wanting a casual effortless look? Work an oversized tartan chiffon shirt with skinny jeans. Going out for the evening? Why not try a tartan pleated skirt with killer high heels. It is affordable and accessible, featuring in nearly every popular high street store. Credit: Moschino
NERVE | 12
Credit: Asos
FASHION
Texture It’s time for some texture! The key pieces for this season are anything in mohair or velvet, though both can be pricey so keep an eye out on the high street. A wardrobe is not complete in this chilly climate without something to pull on over a dress or pair of jeans. They can even be worn out on the town when accessorised with a statement necklace or brooch. Now, where would we be without the vintage classic velvet? It looks sassy and sophisticated, and if you are feeling daring enough, why not try a matching two pieces. This texture looks great for a night out and has a bonus of being extra comfortable. Who says style is pain?
Credit: ASOS
Credit: Marc Jacobs
Leather Leather is looking like THE material this year, to create that ultimate sexy, sultry look. This, like tartan, has such a wide range of styles and items. Every fashion conscious student needs to invest in the staple leather jacket; it’s unbelievably versatile as it can be teamed up with anything and everything in your wardrobe. The options are just endless! If you prefer something more polished opt for a statement leather dress or a leathered sleeved jumper, both on
trend and sure to keep you warm throughout Winter. Though if the idea of head to toe leather is daunting, why not try just an accent of it to begin with, like a leather t-shirt, or a pair of biker boots. Every Winter the right footwear is a must have; it’s the one element that is going to make any outfit look fierce. So why not change it up and sport a pair of cut out boots? Team them up with a pair of lace socks to keep out the chills and you’re golden.
Credit: Oasis
Credit: Topshop
NERVE | 13
Menswear Trends Who can forget the men? Here’s the lowdown on what you guys should be wearing this season
Quilt Who doesn’t love a bit of quilting? It is everywhere at the moment, from coats to bags, quilt is definitely one of this season’s must haves. Just like the quilted jacket which has grown massively in popularity over the last few years, with much credit going to Barbour for this, quilt is being used all across the board. Some of the most popular being quilted jumpers (available from Topman, USC and River Island) and the quilted rucksack, in every colour you can imagine. Most high street retailers have so many different styles of quilt, it’s all about picking and choosing to get the best deals. A trick with wearing quilt is to not wear too much. You may be like me and love it, but wearing too much can be bulky. Try and Topman, £25 stick to one piece in an outfit, paired with slim fit coloured trousers and a plain or patterned tee to really make it look the best it can.
Coloured Trousers Since the rise of the Chino in the last 2 years, people have become a lot more daring with bright colours in their choices with trousers. There isn’t just the same old boring blue jeans, but an abundance of colours to suit all tastes. Blue, red, even luminous orange for the really experimental, you name it, you can find it in every shop you go in. This trend is all about confidence; how bold or bright are you willing to go to really kick an outfit in to gear? For the brightest I would suggest River Island who have really gone for it this season. When wearing these brightly coloured trousers, reserve yourself slightly, don’t go head first in to the wardrobe and come out looking like a pick ‘n’ mix. Pair your trousers with plain shirts, t-shirts and coats, so not to go too far. You could try the tonal look, blend your outfit with tones that complement the trousers to be bang on trend.
This season’s must have accessories are all about the bracelets, and not just one mind you, layers upon layers of them. A collage of them all up your wrists, to make a statement. These simple pieces of jewellery aren’t just for women this season and every high street retailer knows about it. This is a trend that can stretch to all budgets; whether it be the 10 for a £1 at Primark or the £5 Topman offerings, there is something for everyone. There is a lot to choose from when it comes to bracelets, but the main thing to think of is contrast. Don’t just stick to fabric, try and go for leather and metal ones too. A good trick to remember is have one statement piece, maybe a silver identity bracelet and then layer contrasting ones over the top. Take a look around the local high street shops and you’ll find a lot to pick and choose from.
Bracelets
Printed Bombers Last year saw the rise of the bomber jacket back in to main stream fashion. It came back with a bang, everyone one wearing them. This year they’re not planning on leaving but they have evolved and have come out covered in marvellous print to dazzle and intrigue people. The most popular of these being floral, camouflage and checked prints with each high street retailer battling to have the best. I would have to say the places to be looking for these is between H & M and Burton, both of which have really got it right this season with simple yet bold designs, using every type of print imaginable. Bomber Jackets go pretty well with anything and work especially well with anything slim fit. I would go for the slim fit trousers and either a pastel shirt or a baggy tee with this trend. It’s a casual trend so experiment, see what you think looks good with your bomber.
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FUTURE OF THE LEFT
How have fans responded to the new album? Fantastically, but then again if there any negative reactions they probably wouldn’t tell me. We don’t release anything unless we love it. I know the last album had a bit of a mixed reception. A few reviewers have implied that it’s a return to form, but as a band, we don’t think we ever left form. I’m just happy to be in a band making music that I like, let alone what other people like, and my standards are absolutely ridiculous. Believe me, I’m a total bastard. Why do you think the reception to your last album was not as positive? I think it was just a little bit too different all at once. Maybe we were a little bit all over the place at times. I think that album probably would have had a better response if we were releasing it now, and this album was the album then. That would probably make more sense logically, but when you’re in the midst of writing a record you’re not really concerned about logic. We wanted to write a pop album, but we’re just shit at pop music, basically. What made you decide to use Pledgemusic to fund this album?
NERVE | 16
Boasting some of the wittiest lyrics in rock music, Future of the Left stopped off at 60 Million Postcards in November, where James Hibberd spoke to the intimidatingly intelligent presence of frontman Andy ‘Falco’ Falkous
Well, it was either that or don’t record an album! If you want a ten grand car, you can go and steal one, but it’s very difficult to steal a week of studio time without anybody noticing. People would definitely ask ‘what’s that band doing in our studio drinking Becks?’.
“
We wanted to write a pop album, but we’re just shit at pop music
”
You reached the funding goal in less than 6 hours. Why do you think you were so successful? We were very direct, which is very much in the spirit of the band. We weren’t offering bike rides or stuff like that. It sounds like I’m mocking other bands and usually I am, but in this way I’m not. Sometimes it’s in the spirit of a band to have people in the studio or do a personalised Skype call. I only speak to my mother on Skype once every two months so I’m not fucking speaking to some guy called Alan in Grimsby! No offence to Alan in Grimsby, but Alan in
Grimsby doesn’t like our band because we’re gonna call him up and be nice to him. Recently, your former band’s album, Mclusky Do Dallas, was voted the 354th best of all time in a magazine poll. Is that particularly important to you? (laughs) No. The thing is, and this is gonna sound incredibly arrogant, but anybody who says they’re happy with ‘oh, you voted us 26th best album of the year, thanks a lot!’, is fucking lying through their teeth. Nobody deliberately aspires to write the 26th best album of the year. If you do an end of year poll, and you put us in the top 3, I will grudgingly say, ‘oh, thanks a lot mate.’ Who wants to be fucking 354th? Assigning numeric values to music is just so tedious, isn’t it? It’s like a middle-aged man driving a really fast car. You just think ‘aww, look at you’. What are the chances of a Mclusky reunion tour? If I was offered £250,000, that would get you three months. And Jon Chapple (bass) has to get less than half of what I get. They’re my only conditions.
Original Illustration By Laurence Thomas
NERVE AWARDS 2013 Best Artist
MUSIC
Macklemore Daft Punk
Best Newcomer Best Single
FILM
Daft Punk Get Lucky Avicii Wake Me Up Icona Pop I Don’t Care CHVRCHES The Mother We Share Fall Out Boy My Songs Know What You Did in the Dark
NERVE | 18
Lorde Disclosure Bastille
Rudimental John Newman A$AP Rocky
Best Local Act Tim ‘Afro-Ninja’ Somerford Saturday Sun Voodoo Pistols Empire Affair
Best Actor Moises Arias The Kings of Summer Benedict Cumberbatch The Fifth Estate Tom Hanks Captain Phillips Matt Damon Elysium Matthew Goode Stoker
Best Actress Cate Blanchett Blue Jasmine Sandra Bullock Gravity Mia Wasikowska Stoker Judi Dench Philomena Rooney Mara Side Effects
Bastille Haim
Best Album Vampire Weekend Modern Vampires of the City CHVRCHES The Bones of What You Believe Arctic Monkeys AM Kanye West Yeezus Foals Holy Fire Arcade Fire Reflektor
Best Director Steve McQueen 12 Years a Slave Aflonso Cuaron Gravity Danny Boyle Trance Paul Greengrass Captain Phillips
THE NOMINATIONS Best US Show Game Of Thrones Parks And Recreation Archer Breaking Bad
Best Soap Eastenders Corrie
Best Episode
Ozymandias Breaking Bad The Red Wedding Game of Thrones Episode 3 Utopia White Bear Black Mirror
Best Performance
Best Picture Trance Gravity
This is the End Captain Phillips
Best Comedy Parks and Recreation Peep Show New Girl Archer
Reality TV Star Dexter Koh Sam Bailey Spellbound Leah Mcfall
Best UK Show Dr Who Downton Abbey
Š BBC
Ripper Street Scott and Bailey
TELEVISION
Bryan Cranston Breaking Bad Peter Dinklage Game of Thrones Olivia Colman Broadchurch Sheridan Smith Mrs Biggs
Emmerdale Hollyoaks
NERVE | 19
NERVE AWARDS 2013
MUSIC
Best Newcomer
Vampire Weekend Modern Vampires of the City Vampire Weekend’s third effort is by far their best yet, retaining Ezra Koenig’s masterful way with words, yet adding a deeper layer of musicality and an unbelievably consistent set of tracks. If the first two albums were depictions of a privileged student life in the USA, then Modern Vampires of the City is the graduate, tackling themes of money, disillusionment and failed relationships with an extremely catchy pop tune or two. The incredible hard work that went into this album certainly paid off.
Disclosure Siblings Guy and Howard Lawrence, aka Disclosure, seem to have been able to do no wrong this year. They somehow followed their stunning breakthrough track, Latch, with one of the singles of the year in White Noise, and then bagged themselves a No.1 album at the first attempt with Settle. Simultaneously winning over both pop fans and trendy dance followers, it’s easier to find the Loch Ness monster than it is to find someone who doesn’t like Disclosure these days. Narrowly missing out on a Mercury Prize might hurt, but the even more prestigious Nerve Magazine ‘Best Newcomer’ award should cheer them up.
Best Single
Best Album
Avicii- ‘Wake Me Up’ Having already scored massive dancefloor hits with Levels and I Could Be The One, Swedish superstar DJ Avicii could have released a remix of the Thomas the Tank Engine theme tune and Friday night clubbers would have lapped it up. So when he dropped the Mumfords-ata-rave slice of genius that is Wake Me Up, it caught everyone by surprise, allegedly leaving festival-goers at the Ultra Festival in Miami where it was first heard ‘angered and confused.’ The merging of house and folk may have been deemed sacrilege by some, but the risk paid off for Avicii, to the point that the self-taught 24-year-old was the sixth highest earning DJ of 2013, making a cool $20 million, and even your granny has probably heard of him.
Best Artist NERVE | 20
Best Local Act
Empire Affair Since their formation in 2011 Empire Affair have got around a bit in Bournemouth, playing at venues from The Anvil to the Bournemouth O2. They have also been stretching their shows further afield; frequenting London, Southampton, and even doing a string of shows in Croatia. They have supported The Hoosiers and All the Young, and are always praised for their enthusiasm and ability to get the crowd singing. They have two EPs out, Red Light, and Sparks in the Dark and they have new songs in the works, whilst also ‘taking time out from a busy 80-show summer, to work on things behind the scenes.’
Daft Punk 2013 saw the much anticipated global release of Daft Punk’s fourth studio album Random Access Memories. This was their first full release in eight years, although they’d been busy working on the Tron soundtrack, as well as a multitude of other things. It was good to have them back in the charts; their iconic tracks of yesteryear are still regulars of DJ sets around the world. Daft Punk produced some of the biggest hits of the year; not a surprise considering their discography. Two of the biggest tracks, Get Lucky, and Lose Yourself to Dance show no signs of going away, and the duo rely almost solely on their music to be popular, doing minimal promotion and interviews.
THE WINNERS
Best Actress
Best Actor
FILM Credit: Sony Pictures
Best Picture
Mia Wasikowska When it comes to the Academy Awards early next year, it seems as if Cate Blanchett’s barnstormer of a performance in Blue Jasmine will take home the statuette. However, lurking in something a bit more artistic, Park Chan-wook’s Stoker, is the female performance of the year. Mia Wasikowska is best known for her lead role in Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland, but she could not be more different here. Stoker is the complex tale of Wasikowska’s character experiencing a sexual awakening initiated by her psychopathic, murderous uncle. It’s just as messed up as it sounds, with the Oldboy director spinning a chaotic, deeply symbolic tale of sex and seduction with Wasikowska’s vulnerable, yet terrifying, performance at its centre. The key to Wasikowska’s genius here is the way she so subtly changes from the vulnerable, sheltered little girl of the film’s opening to the corrupted mess that she winds up as. This performance probably won’t win any big awards, but it should.
Tom Hanks Nothing on the silver screen this year has even come close to the sheer, emotional power of Tom Hanks’ central performance in the gripping Somalian pirate movie Captain Phillips. He perfectly conveys the true horror of the character’s predicament, bringing his trademark every-man quality in abundance. As stricken mariner Richard Phillips, Hanks strikes the perfect balance between assured expertise and real human panic. It’s a stunning portrayal that takes the audience with Phillips on his emotional rollercoaster. There’s a clumsiness in Phillips’ physicality that works in complete contrast to his mental assertiveness and composure. The performance is all about duality and is a real testament to the fact that Tom Hanks is one of the world’s greatest living actors. His final scene is a masterclass in emotive performance that is yet to be matched by anyone else in 2013. He’ll certainly be in contention at the Oscars, or at least he definitely should be. For that finale alone, Hanks deserves every award coming to him.
Gravity Out of the four nominated pictures, each had their arguments to win the award for Best Picture. The Nerve Award however, goes to Gravity. If there could be a manual for how to create an extraordinary movie, the blueprint for this picture would be lesson 101. The movie was in the hands of the fabulous Oscar-nominated Alfonso Cuaron and Oscar-winning leads George Clooney and Sandra Bullock took his vision to a place that was simply out of this world (excuse the pun). A truly unique cinematic rollercoaster that deserves to win big in the upcoming award season. Walking out of the screening is similar to the feeling of getting off of Stealth at Thorpe Park; once it’s over, it feels almost impossible to resist coming back for more.
Best Director
Paul Greengrass Another tough one to choose, and Trance may come as a surprise, but Boyle’s holiday project in-between the planning of the Olympic opening ceremony was truthfully gripping. Cuaron almost made it a double with the mesmerising Gravity, but the award has to go to Paul Greengrass for drama-adventure Captain Phillips. He had us gripped in the Bourne trilogy, and he maintained that thrill throughout this film, with just a little help from the brilliant Tom Hanks of course. This is a fantastic story based on true events that occurred a few years back when Somali pirates took an American ship hostage. Greengrass does a great job in keeping you exhilarated but lets you indulge in the characters that keep developing throughout.
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NERVE AWARDS 2013
TELEVISION Best Soap
Best UK Show
Eastenders Deciding on the best soap was always going to be tough, but when it comes to keeping with the times, Eastenders has managed the best. It has reinvented its cast, introduced an influx of new characters, and focused on a younger audience - including storylines such as Lola’s journey into motherhood. Fear not though, it hasn’t turned into a replica of Hollyoaks classic characters such as Ian Beale and Dot Cotton still remain to keep consistency and familiarity for the older demographic. With brilliant acting, believable storylines and storylines everyone is talking about.
Downton Abbey With viewing figures still going strong, Downton Abbey has not only managed to capture the hearts of the British public, from young to old, but has also broken through in America, becoming one of the most watched TV series in the world. This classic drama, following the lives of the occupants of Downton Abbey, presents a story in a way that not only captivates the audience, but also manages to reflect the life of an upper class early twentieth century family brilliantly. The programme is proof that special effects and CGI mean nothing if you can create a well-balanced, interesting and good quality piece of drama.
Best TV Event
Netflix ‘How is Netflix a TV event?’, we hear you say. Good job we have 150 words to sway your opinion. This year Netflix brought back Arrested Development, unveiled House of Cards – which we hear is great, but you know, it’s on the list – and made sure Britain was up to date with Breaking Bad without having to resort to less than legal measures. The best TV events of the year weren’t on your television. Your TV might as well now be a Netflix receiver, because if you aren’t surfing the edge of its zeitgeist shows, then there’s plenty of classic and cult shows for you to lose yourself in. Netflix is taking over TV and if that isn’t an event, we don’t know what else is.
Best Reality TV Contestant
Credit: BBC
Best Episode
Everyone! At Nerve, we’re nothing if not innovators, so instead of choosing a winner, let’s all rejoice that 2013 gave us (at least) four high quality TV episodes that you owe to yourself to see. Oh, why are they so high quality? Because they will shock you to your very core and have you begging your friends to watch just so you can talk about them. Utopia’s third episode has an introduction that will not be bettered for a long time, Ozymandias is where Walter White starts to pay a very high price for his arrogance and The Red Wedding has everything you would want from a Game Of Thrones wedding, but these episodes earned a lot of their power through the patient build up of a series.
Leah McFall Her hair-tingling vocal acrobatics took the nation by surprise and, although she didn’t win, Leah Mcfall became an overnight success after her soulful performance of ‘I Will Survive’ on this year’s ‘The Voice’, sent her rocketing up the charts to claim a place in the top 10 - something never before achieved by a reality TV star whilst still on the show. Week by week she left the judges speechless, the public astounded and her fellow competitors running scared as she sailed all the way to the final with a run of show-stopping performances. Originally from Ireland, this 24 year old has been hailed as the next big thing in music, with judge and mentor Will.I.Am flying her to New York within a week of the final to start work on her debut album: definitely something to look out for.
THE WINNERS
Best US Show
The Valleys The X Factor is really fun to moan about on Twitter and Made In Chelsea is full of people with too much money doing really stupid things for us all to gaze in wonder at. These sorts of shows don’t do much for us... except for The Valleys. Perhaps it’s the awful copyright free music played on the on-demand version, which only adds to the guilty charm of it all. You know what, it’s probably that we’re too invested in the potentially nuclear relationship of Chidgey and Nat that had us on tenterhooks more than we should admit. You might lose a few brain cells, but The Valleys is worth it.
Breaking Bad While Game Of Thrones continues to be addictive viewing that culminated in one very special episode, and Parks & Rec and Archer remain the gold standard for transatlantic comedy, this was the year of Breaking Bad. It wasn’t all a disturbing prelude to Malcolm In The Middle. No other show matched the weekly intensity offered by Walter White’s dark descent into an awfulness and neither would we want them to. Each subsequent cliffhanger left most fans in a state of cold turkey, as theories piled up on what was going to happen next. We won’t spoil it for you, but know that if you haven’t sat down to experience the ballad of Heisenberg, then that assignment can wait.
Best Comedy
Best Guilty Pleasure
Credit: NBC
Parks and Recreation Parks and Recreation started on BBC 4 this year, which means that those who had never experienced the greatest town in the world - that would be Pawnee - and all its residents in its proper glory, finally had a chance to. You took it right? I mean, it has arguably the best cast of any comedy on TV at the moment, guaranteed laughs every episode and one of the cutest romances on TV. Yes, even better than Nick and Jess. While the BBC is currently four seasons behind the US, the second series is consistently brilliant with classic episodes like 94 Meetings and Woman Of The Year getting their UK debut this year, the latter bringing laser sharp satire of gender equality.
Best Performance
Olivia Colman Her role in ‘Accused’ won her a Bafta, and this year Colman returned to our screens in the critically acclaimed ‘Broadchurch’. Starring alongside David Tennant, Colman’s gritty portrayal of Detective Sergeant Ellie Miller was widely praised by industry experts and lead to her nomination as ‘Best Actress’ in the TV Choice Awards. Coleman does a brilliant job in this serious role, offering a no-nonsense, yet intimate, portrayal of life as a police officer. After recently confirming she will be reprising her role in the upcoming second series, viewers are sure to be pleased to see this great actress back on their screens.
NOT HAPPY? Let us know what you would have changed and why ‘Nerve Magazine’
@nervemagazine
www.nervemedia.org.uk NERVE | 23
FEATURES
Unmasking the truth P
Over 1,000 people came out in anonymous protest on London’s streets on November 5th as part of the Million Mask March. Who exactly did these faceless activists represent? And what were they trying to achieve? Adam Worsley went to find out.
arliament Square. Around 8pm, the 5th November. Two girls covered by thin, white, strips of cloth and flour flow like liquid between each other; one leaps into the other’s arms, she holds her tight and floats over to the police perimeter, gazes into their eyes, and gently places her friend at his feet. The policemen look baffled. He can’t take it; his eyes spin –it’s too much. He’s freaking inside his head. Another officer to his side notices his distress and motions at him to calm down. Fortunately, the two ghostly girls move on with their dance, out into the crowd. The view of the police becomes blocked by a crowd of demonstrators, and a hint of disappointment touches a few faces before they remember that they must act as expected. They reattach their masks and return to staring dead-eyed at the crowd. London’s Million Mask March has been called a failure. It has been mocked in the media, branded as a bunch of burn-outs, hippies and druggies. Russell Brand made a half-masked, fully-arsed appearance and quickly became the media’s figurehead of the movement. The people protesting are the first to agree; they are not the state’s version of an ideal citizen. With no established leadership and no published list of demands, the movement requires participation to understand it. Similar to the ‘Occupy’ protests, the Million Mask March was echoed across the globe in at least 440 cities across every continent. Protesters believe these marches are a show of solidarity. The vast majority of people attending have lost all faith in the "political game" that the ruling classes over the world play. Instead of attempting to fix the ‘corrupt’, ‘violent’ and ‘elitist’ system, they have simply stopped playing along, creating their own thing instead. On bonfire night, a large part of that ‘thing’ is a party. A NERVE | 24
Design Lucy Figiel couple of sound systems find themselves surrounded by masked figures raving to drum & bass. Colourful smoke bombs and chaos pads and rhymes, acoustic guitars and drums. The atmosphere is electric. There’s constant movement, people flinging themselves around the square and bouncing off police lines. A group of around 8 people huddle together, holding "stop the cull" signs. Behind them a middle aged couple are sat on the street, blissfully blazing. People have bought their children to this; some have even bought their pets. The protest was mostly peaceful, with only a few scuffles between civilians and police. No blood was spilled. Light-hearted exchanges between police and protesters show the truth behind the ideals of this movement; humanity is made up of common people, determined to have fun and love. Many protesters pleaded with police to forget their rank and join in, citing police budget cuts and warned of future tensions between the two groups if their differences were not resolved sooner. One of the protestors, Asif, tells me about how he came from a financially wealthy family. He explains his presence. "The Internet has given humanity a means to communicate that transcends almost all physical boundaries. This has had a positive effect on the people, and enables them to find out exactly how the world is run and the selfishness
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if some people are blinded to the truth behind our masks, then it is only a matter of time
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of those at the top." Asif views their message in an almost divine light. "It’s clear that all religions share a few basic messages in common with each other, namely peace, love and unity. We are the physical embodiment of that message." No matter what you think of the ideas these people live their lives around, there is more than a little truth to each of them. Well versed in various "government sponsored gang-wars" around the world, they are quick to condemn the blatant disrespect for human life that some hold. The facts are clear – at no time do modern governments have their people’s interests at heart, forgoing them instead for financial gain. Protests do not work. The Iraq war saw over one million people protest in London, and many more around the globe, yet this was still ignored by the government.
It’s close to the end of the night, only a couple of handfuls of rebel souls remain. They drink, smoke, chat. The police are bored; they want to go home - but they are now more willing to talk with the protesters. Several views are held in common, and the police listen to the knowledge that some in the crowd share with them with open ears. This was the point. The movement was a showing of numbers; a discussion of ideas, culture, and love. "We don’t state our goals, our mission. It’s clear what this is" Asif said "and if some people are blinded to the truth behind our masks, then it is only a matter of time." The immediate aftermath of the protest is simple – nothing will change. The protesters expect this, and they will be back next year in greater numbers, and again, and again, until those with power have no option but to listen. NERVE | 25
ENTS With their new album turning heads, the Pigeon Detectives are back and gigging around the country. Guitarist Ryan Wilson spoke to Nerve about 10 years in the game, and how they’re loving every minute of it.
The Pigeon Detectives are reaching their final shows of a successful and enjoyable tour, after a busy Summer covering plenty of air miles in a short time, including a 28 hour journey from the top of Scotland to
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We find we get twitchy if we’re sat at home for too long
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the bottom of Russia. They seem pleased though, especially as the new album is going down a storm. ‘It isn’t a worry, but you can drop some of the old singles and everyone will know them word for word, but when playing some of the new singles and people know them it makes it better for us’, Ryan says The new album shows them off at their finest, and they haven’t had to switch their music to suit
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trends. With plenty of positive responses on social media, and high sales on tour, it’s safe to say they made the right decision. ‘We haven’t just produced a dubstep album because dubstep’s popular at the moment or whatever. We do what we do best, and those who have bought our previous records, think it’s really good.’ After appearing at numerous festivals, you might think that they’d take some time off and put their feet up, but instead they went out on the road to promote their fourth album, We Met at Sea. The band’s enthusiasm for touring is
undeniable, and Ryan adds, ‘Touring is the best bit of what we do, even if travelling is difficult.’ ‘Kubana in Russia was really good, but it was a nightmare to get to. We’d done a festival in Inverness up in Scotland two days before and it took us 28 hours to get there. We had to take three flights and two eight hour coach journeys. The festival was great though. It was in the south of Russia, right by the Black Sea so it was dead warm. The stage was right next to the sea; before the gig we went swimming
which was really good fun.’ Ryan has some words of advice for those trying to make it in the music industry themselves; take as many support slots as you can. ‘It’s the best thing to get out there. Even though we’re technically a ‘successful band’, having sold a fair few records, we would still happily be a support act in a place where we’re less known. You’ve got 30 to 40 minutes to play to an audience who don’t necessarily know you, so its an amazing opportunity. On this tour support came in the form of The Covelles and The Mexanines, who won a competition earlier in the year to support The Pigeons. Ryan said: ‘We like giving guys an opportunity to support us, and it’s great that we get good comments from the bands, and audiences. We
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The music industry has changed a lot in ten years
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don’t like to put any old rubbish band on.’ March will mark the tenth anniversary of The Pigeon Detectives’ first gig in a Leeds’ pub with a capacity of 50 people. For such a milestone, they’re definitely doing something right. They can’t say for definite what next year holds for them, as nothing is fixed yet, or will be for at least a few months. The plan is to put themselves out there for all the usual suspects festival wise, but also keep their eyes open for smaller ones. In their lifespan, The Pigeon Detectives have played all over the place, in venues of very different sizes. From pubs to bigger venues like Alexandra Palace, do they have a preference? ‘Venues that aren’t too small or too big like KOKO are the best. Some small venues have small stages so you’re restricted even though you’ve
got a good vibe. KOKO isn’t a massive room, but a big stage.’ The music industry has changed a lot in ten years, and the band seems to try to distance themselves from certain aspects of it, having recorded their albums with independent labels. Ryan explains: ‘We try not to get involved in music industry bullshit really. We’ve noticed that when we were flying really high people were so far up our arses, but now we’ve levelled out a bit, they don’t wanna know and they’ve moved onto the next band who will sell 10,000 albums. It’s very fickle. It’s how I got my mortgage, but I don’t respect it. I respect the people who buy tickets to our gigs, and albums, ‘cause they’re the ones who’re gonna stick with us.’ ‘We’re from hardworking backgrounds, and we’re hardened working class lads. We know what the crack is, and while the industry seems hard sometimes, it’s a test of character.’ As for industry awards, Ryan adds, ‘I think it’s a weird one. I’m not jealous or bitter or anything, but we’ve never been put up for them really. We were nominated for best newcomer when we first started, but those who have the most money or the biggest record label seem to always win. Being part of independent record labels means we never seem to get put up for stuff like that.’ ‘It’s not really our thing.’ He says. ‘I think it’s a shame, because though some bands who are nominated deserve it, I can think of many other bands who are better who didn’t even get a look in.’ Words Joanne Ball
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THE Blog DIARIES FASHION
By Scarlett Dixon
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the readership started to increase and eventually people were commenting on my articles and having a say on what I’d written. The fashion blogging world is absolutely huge, not to mention very saturated. So initially, entering into
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BEFORE I kNEW IT, I WAS BEING INVITED TO SIT FRONT ROW AT LONDON FASHION WEEK
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here’s 170 million of them, live and online as we speak. It has made Mario Armando Lavandeira - more commonly known as the infamous Perez Hilton - millions (both in dollars and enemies) and transformed how we communicate, articulate our opinions and share forever. But whenever I tell people that I run a blog of my own, I am usually met with a rather blank stare. Blogging, although seemingly a new trend, has been around for decades. Carrie Bradshaw, you could say - was one notable ‘blogger’, although admittedly the programme and template she used were fairly basic and the writing mostly romance related. However, with Wordpress, Blogger and self-hosted domains becoming far easier to use, more accessible and much simpler to buy - people have started laying down the foundations for their own little space of the internet in their millions. I set up scarlettlondon.com in May 2011, after reading an article which sparked my interest and with no other place to express my opinions other than Microsoft Word and a blog.com hosted domain just minutes away - it seemed like a good idea at the time. I never expected anyone to read it and to begin with, no-one did. It was my little place to write away, express my (often farfetched) opinions and to make it my own. I didn’t even tell my friends or family. Then gradually, after posting several links on Twitter,
this scary realm (I now know my Louboutins from my Louis Vuitton - but to begin with, I didn’t) was out of the question, especially since my blog had been about articles and opinions rather than fashion or beauty. However, when I started including fashion based articles on my blog and received a positive reaction, I continued in this direction. Whether it’s hunting down a high street copy or a designer inspired dupe, the fashion section, alongside the features,
food, beauty and events sections slowly started to grow and before I knew it, I was being invited to sit front row at London Fashion Week, to interview the cast of Made In Chelsea and attend out-of-this-world (quite literally) product launches. Blogging can be misused and in many cases it is, however it can also be an extremely effective tool whatever profession you want to go into. It demonstrates that you have a genuine interest for that one (or many) topic/s and that you are committed to writing about it, researching it and getting involved in what it has to offer. If you are an aspiring media professional, having a blog can be an invaluable way of getting your foot in the door, in addition to having an online portfolio of your work for people to search for. I managed to secure a placement at celebrity management and PR company CAN Associates as a result of my blog and truly believe I wouldn’t have experienced half the things I have now if I hadn’t started it in the first place. And it’s not just me. When I tweeted asking fellow bloggers why they set up theirs, I was met with many responses stating it was ‘a mix between a public diary and a creative outlet’, in addition to it being ‘therapeutic’ and a ‘means to interact with those who have similar tastes’. There are so many reasons to blog, you just have to find yours.
Blogging SOS
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he first decision to make when setting up your blog is to choose a provider. My personal favourite is Wordpress, as it is reliable, free and easy to use, as well as professional looking. However, many of my blogger friends prefer Blogger (often known as Blogspot) so it may be worth playing around and setting up on both platforms before making your decision. Try not to focus on the design and formatting of your blog to begin with, as it will soon fall into place. I changed my design around several times, before eventually deciding to hire a professional to create a look that suited what it was about - but at first, just a simple, clean
having a blog can be an invaluable way of getting your foot in the door.
and professional layout is key. Don’t have any elaborate fonts, difficult to read colours or garish pictures which distract from the main content. Choosing what to actually blog about can perhaps be the hardest task in itself and it’s the question I am asked most often. I personally don’t think you need a ‘niche’ however if there is something you feel passionate about - write about it. Make yourself an expert in the field (almost) and research, write and talk about what interests you. If there isn’t something you could blog about regularly, then why not treat your blog as an online diary? It’s a great way to practise your writing skills, as well as building up an
interactive relationship with readers. And finally, set yourself up on all the social media channels you can. My blog wouldn’t be half as accessible as it is now (and I still can’t believe it) if it wasn’t for the ‘elusive’ Twitter. Using hashtags to promote your posts and tagging #fashion or #beauty if it involves either topic, is an effective way of picking up and engaging new readers, in addition to sparking a debate. And don’t just post ‘read my new article here...’, ask people a question, entice them in. I always follow the motto, would I want to read that? If not, I won’t post it. The world of blogging essentially is an open book. Not everyone will agree with your opinions, but it is a great way to have a voice and to have it heard. Just make that little corner of the internet your own.
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THROUGH THE LENS
SEND YOUR PHOTOS TO photo@nervemedia.org.uk
CHRISTMAS PRESENT Joshua Iredale Magazine Editor "I took this photo of my dog Lily last Christmas, when playing around with a camera I had borrowed. "She had just opened her present, and as you can see, she was very happy with it!" Got any Christmas photos you want to share with us? Send them in to photo@nervemedia. org.uk!
FASHION
VINTAGE n o i FashFAIR Bournemouth’s Blast From The Past
have you got your winter wardrobe ready? lizza - 20
ellie - 20
Favourite piece is her blouse - it’s so old that she can’t remember where she got it.
Favourite piece(s) rings because they come from all over.
kim - 18 Favourite piece - shoes, unbelievably comfortable.
nick - 20 Favourite item: blazer for only 35 pounds (it was a steal!)
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Tea &ke
Ca
brighten up your winter wardrobe
jade - 20 Dungaree dress - her style is influenced by Alexa Chung who often wears them.
bernadine -20 Favourite item: pants because... well.. it’s self explantory
taylor - 19 Favourite item: skirt because it’s a vintage 90s skirt by Dorothy Perkins Photography Lucas Ottone (www.lucasottone.com)
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ENTS
Christmas Gifts SOS
Stuck with what to get the family for Christmas? Fear not! Nerve is here with some entertainment gift essentials Grandmother
Cliff Richard: The Fabulous Rock ‘N’ Roll Songbook. This collection of early American hits is sure to send your grandmother swinging back to her heyday. With the iconic Cliff Richard providing vocals, a drunken jive is certain to be demonstrated in order to remind the family what ‘real music’ is like, probably on the table over the Christmas dinner" rock and roll. http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Fabulous-Rock-Roll-Songbook/dp/B00EP7A446
Grandfather
Pacific Rim A David Attenborough box-set may seem fitting, but every elderly gentleman loves to indulge in a good action DVD, and Pacific Rim offers the perfect mix of excitement and adventure. This great quality
film is sure to be a welcome relief to a grandfather expecting to unwrap yet another cotton handkerchief, and will definitely leave him feeling young again. http://www.amazon.co.uk/Pacific-RimDVD-UV-Copy/dp/B00A6UHBRO
Mum
Miranda Hart’s Maracattack A good workout DVD is hard to come by, but this Christmas an alternative way of losing those festive pounds is offered by none other than British comedienne, Miranda Hart. With most of the exercises involving a maraca, a golden line up of comedians and exclusive extras and sketches, this DVD is sure to at least keep your mum laughing until the annual ‘end of diet’ day – usually January the 2nd. http://www.amazon.co.uk/Miranda-Harts-Maracattack-DVD-Hart/dp/ B00FXYJADG
Dad
House of Cards – The Complete First Season Political drama is always a safe option for a middle
aged male, and Kevin Spacey takes the lead in this gripping tale, based on the British original. This boxset should provide great afternoon viewing for your dad – and if it gives him the opportunity to fall asleep in the armchair whilst waiting for the turkey to cook – even better. http://www.amazon.co.uk/HouseCards-Season-DVD-Copy/dp/ B00AWN5ACS
Brother
Call of Duty: Ghosts An addictive, hard to put down, action adventure – any brother would be more than happy find this gem of a game scattered amongst his pile of new socks, deodorants and selection boxes, but beware the consequences of having him lock himself away in his room all day in order to complete it. http://www.amazon.co.uk/Call-DutyGhosts-Xbox-360/dp/B00CFARTD4
Sister
Jessie J – Alive Whose sister doesn’t like a good groove around the room whilst listening to the sweet vocals of Jessie J? Her newest album is the perfect gift with great, upbeat tracks to keep her dancing all the way into the New Year, or perhaps the into Christmas tree after a failed attempt at a twerk. http://www.amazon.co.uk/Alive-Jessie-J/dp/B00EIMJVOM
Child
Disney Pixar Complete Collection Boxset: If you’re looking for a magical adventure to give to a special child in your life, then this gift is perfect. Released just in time for Christmas, this DVD box-set, filled with all the classics, from the ‘Toy Story’ trilogy to ‘Finding Nemo’, is a must have this season, and the convenient cube shaped box makes it easy to wrap – foolproof. http://www.amazon.co.uk/Disney-Pixar-Complete-Collection-DVD/dp/B00EHFL2XI Words Lewis Treleaven Illustration Alice Kirkham
COMMENT
Why I Hate Christmas Come the season of love and joy, I definitely won’t be rockin’ around the Christmas tree
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rom the mince pies to the stockings over the fireplace, to the tree obstructing the living room and the women who think making everything smell like pine is helping spread ‘Christmas joy’, the festive season is upon us. It’s the time when you can worry about finances, stomach the copious adverts on TV and realise just how much this time of the year makes you hate everything. For example, it has constantly baffled me why we have such things as seasonal food like mince pies, which are just as good all year round. Don’t get me wrong, Christmas pudding can stay in its 11 month shell of loneliness and reflect on how bad it tastes and how it looks like something a rabbit would leave on a golf course, but mince pies? A week after Christmas Day, eating one of these treats is considered the highest level of repugnant behaviour. ‘It’s a Christmas food,’ says the same kind of person who reads the Daily Mail and gets emotional over John Lewis adverts. I don’t know what the New Year will bring but I hope it gives Mince Pie makers the knowledge that if you market something as a year round treat, they will make more money, and make me happier. The societal pressure to look good before and after the 3 days of promoted gluttony is another thing that adds a commercialised edge to this ‘family’ season. Gyms are promoting impressionable people to ‘get into shape, you gluttonous mess’ before they change their tune to ‘lose all that Christmas fat you appallingly greedy pig’. This adds a nasty taste to the days of sitting around eating that doesn’t come from the Christmas pudding (although let’s face it, it could of come from that). People are either rewarding themselves for the few weeks good work put in before this day and then feeling bad about it with every bite or, the
people who haven’t done any work are whispering into their dinner ‘the diet starts soon, it starts very soon my sweet,’ like a Gollum driven insane by the pressure to eat. People who dismiss all religion as ‘pathetic’ and can’t wait ‘for there to be nothing after death to prove you wrong,’ are the same kind of people who don’t get invited places but will be enthusiastically ripping open presents come Christmas morning. Hold on! Isn’t Christmas a Christian celebration of the birth of their lord and saviour? Should you really be opening those gifts in his name there, oh you clever atheist? I’m not a Muslim, so I don’t celebrate Eid Al-Fitr, I’m not a Sikh, so I don’t celebrate Vaisakhi, I’m not Jewish so I don’t celebrate Yom Kippur and I’m not a Christian, yet I will be there with you on Christmas morning, opening a cheap collection of aftershave from the relative who ran out of ideas years ago, and why? Oh because this celebration guarantees me guilt heavy, pressure filled gifts in the only acceptable time of the year for me to eat Mince Pies. Maybe the most hateful part of Christmas is just how we’ve managed to devalue a day that means so much to others into a month of nervous preparation, worrying if you’ve spent too much, tweeting about the coke advert being on TV and listening to a whispery cover of an 80s classic on the John Lewis advert. People like to champion it as a day of family togetherness, couldn’t we just do that one separate day a year and not spend a month concerned about our weight and trying to time on what day it is socially acceptable to eat mince pies? Enjoy your festive season, I am going to spend it in a shell of loneliness and reflect on how I look like something a rabbit would leave on a golf course, but at least I won’t be stressing myself out.
Words: Luke Stevenson Multi-Media Journalism @Luke18S Illustration: Nathan Hackett AUCB Illustration Graduate
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Christmas pudding can reflect on how bad it tastes, and how it looks like something a rabbit would leave on a golf course
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to say?
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ANY Size PIZZA
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Mad About Bridget
FEATURES
W
ith pants the size of your grandmother’s and every flirtatious encounter ending with a cringe-worthy blush, there was never a character more relatable than the infamous Miss Bridget Jones, who represented the life we all lived and the drama we aspired to have. With the latest tale of Miss Jones ‘Mad About the Boy’ now out, there is one question deep within our Darcy-loving hearts - Is Bridget Jones still relevant a decade on? Sure, emails have quickly turned into texts and answering machines have been replaced by Skype, but is there ever a time when the quirky, awkwardly determined Bridget isn’t on our level? I think not. Here are the life lessons a-la-Bridget that prove our contemporary heroine is still relevant today more than ever. Long live the party. With her signature chardonnay being old-fashioned, Bridget has now moved on to cocktails while keeping the original vodka craze alive. She drinks a bit too much, but isn’t an alcoholic. She has a group of best friends she can get wasted with who are always on her side no matter what the situation. Ring any bells? As a student, nothing could be more relevant than a girl’s night with cocktails, and although now replaced with Beyoncé, Miss Jones’ famous statement "I choose Vodka...and Chaka Khan" couldn’t be truer. Love isn’t patient. She sits at home waiting for the phone to ring and we glare at our phones awaiting texts. She fancied Mr Wrong but was constantly wishing for Mr Right to like her – just like us. Communication may be quicker through the internet but there is nothing easier about relationships. Dropping a cheeky text and no response for 2 hours? Drunk-dialling your ex? Bridget may be new to the awkwardness of such acts but she is the
original queen of verbal diarrhoea: "You once said you liked me just as I am and I just wanted to say likewise. I mean there are stupid things your mum buys you, tonight’s another... classic. You’re haughty, and you always say the wrong thing in every situation and I seriously believe that you should rethink the length of your sideburns. But, you’re a nice man and I like you. If you wanted to pop by some time that might be nice... more than nice." Never wear a skirt when climbing a fireman’s pole. It didn’t work for Bridget and it definitely won’t work for you. Don’t judge by first impressions. A seemingly arrogant know-it-all and a goofy klutz never seemed more wrong for one another - but that’s just what made Bridget and Mr Darcy a match made in heaven. You may hear him referring to you as a ‘verbally incontinent spinster, who smokes like a chimney, drinks like a fish and dresses like her mother’ but just hold out, that guy wearing the silly Santa jumper could be the love of your life. When you get an invite to a fancy dress party, check it and then check it again. One of the most important lessons for us to learn from – never get caught looking like a common prostitute at a family event. "Now, I’ll go home and... de-bunny." And finally, always be careful when answering the phone. It could be a prospective employer or even worse... Mum. "Bridget Jones, wanton sex goddess, with a very bad man between her thighs... Mum...Hi." Words Mallory Mabe NERVE | 39
R E V I E W E D Gravity
In Cinemas 07/11/13 By Tom Beasley
Every few years, a film comes along that makes all the multiplex trash seem worthwhile. With its spellbinding visuals and believable focus on the empty infinity of space, Gravity is the closest sci-fi cinema has got to Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey in the 45 years since his classic was released. Children of Men director Alfonso Cuarón has conjured up something extraordinary here. It’s a masterclass in stripped-down storytelling, focusing on the simple tale of Sandra Bullock’s character being left adrift in the abyss after debris destroys her spacecraft. Besides Bullock and fellow astronaut George Clooney, space is the only real character here, and Cuarón makes sure it’s a big one.Gravity manages to embrace both subtlety and spectacle in equal measure like no other film has done recently. Could it be that rare breed of a sci-fi Oscar winner? In a few months, we’ll know.
Sean Lock
Captain Phillips
Bournemouth Pavilion made a charming theatre venue for Sean Lock’s stand up tour, The Purple Van Man. Eight out of ten cats (and people) probably recognise Sean Lock from his team captain role on Channel 4’s comedic look at the week’s events and if you are wondering what he’s like to see live, this is a great snapshot into his standup comic style. The Purple Van Man tour shows Sean’s slightly skewed look on the world, going from general whinges on how his wife’s ability to buy him good presents leaves a lot to be desired to some surreal gags about mythical centaurs. Sean ranges from mocking his mundane persona, joking that he likes to squander his only spare time by staring into the abyss, to convincing us drinking is a legitimate hobby. It was a hilarious performance and well worth picking up the DVD for a decent Christmas present. NERVE | 40
Tom Hanks shines with his best performance in years as the eponymous sailor kidnapped by brutal Somalian pirates. Recounting a true story, Paul Greengrass directs a claustrophobic, pulse-pounding thriller that could be bathed in prizes when awards season comes along next year. Hanks is well matched by first-time actor Barkhad Abdi who portraysthe leader of the pirate gang with ferocious intensity. The film is at its strongest when it works as a two-hander between these two, dissecting the enormous cultural gap between two captains just trying to feed their families. Greengrass manages to squeeze every drop of tension possible out of the scenario, ensuring that audiences leave the cinema feeling completely emotionally drained. Also, watch out for a late scene in which Tom Hanks delivers some of the best acting committed to celluloid in years.
Bournemouth Pavilion 06/11/13, By Charlotte Gay
In Cinemas 18/10/13 By Tom Beasley
Bad Grandpa
Thor: The Dark World
Taking one character from their hugely successful TV series and stretching his gag out for a tedious 90 minutes, the Jackass team return with the tremendously unfunny Bad Grandpa. Johnny Knoxville stretches skin and patience as the saggy, inappropriate Irving Zisman forced to drive his grandson (Jackson Nicoll) and the corpse of his dead spouse across America. The main gimmick is that, in Borat style, the film supposedly features the real reactions of real people. Fans of the Jackass films will probably leave disappointed. Those that aren’t fans will probably feel a little bit like the decaying body in the boot.
Marvel’s Phase Two blasts into life after the slight disappointment of Iron Man 3 with this rollicking adventure for the Norse hero of Asgard. With the amazing Tom Hiddleston as Loki in tow and a new villain in the shape of Christopher Eccleston’s Malekith, this is Thor bringing the hammer down hard. Game of Thrones director Alan Taylor brings gravitas to the action sequences whilst the script crackles with some of the wittiest dialogue the franchise has ever displayed. The Dark World is an awful lot of fun throughout, but does suffer from the little time it gives to its somewhat poorly developed female characters. That said, it is the only blot on this otherwise excellent entry in the superhero canon.
Radio PWR
Childhood
Fryars’ highly anticipated debut EP Radio PWR hit the shelves in October. In his first record, Benjamin Garrett combines electronic pop with elements from both the future and the past. Produced by Luke Smith and Rodaidh McDonald, who have previously worked with Foals, The XX and Depeche Mode, this song has potential to turn in to a big hitter in the hands of the right DJs. Besides The Power, Fryars also includes self-produced tracks Wedding Crasher, Yoni, Cypress Av. and You Hold The Key To My Heart on his EP, featuring influences from Justin Timberlake and Kanye West. The a cappella sections also have a Pendulum-esque ring to them. Having supported London Grammar, Fryars will have a few European festival appearances in October and November, before a run of support dates with indie-pop duo Summer Camp.
Saturday night at 60 Million Postcards sees a venue packed, not only with postcards, but also young people. A band of youngsters called Cowboy got the crowd going ahead of the eagerly anticipated main act. Childhood’s look might remind you of One Direction, but the way they perform and play their instruments couldn’t be any more different. Mixing indie with a slice of hardcore gives the sound a youthful rock edge, but the heavy guitar licks and drums make you forget any teeny bopper allusion you may have had. Lead singer Ben loses himself on stage, breathing as if music was his lifeblood and keeps the crowd moving by giving 120%. Instrumentally, the music absolutely convinces and although we are still facing a young band vocally, who are relatively new to performing live, they no doubt have bags of potential and energy.
In Cinemas 23/10/13 By Tom Beasley
Fryars 14/10/13, By Eva-maria Maierhofer
In Cinemas 30/10/13 By Tom Beasley
60 Million Postcards By Eva-maria Maierhofer
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FEATURES
The Real
Alice in Wonderland
Forget superwoman - meet Nicki Grainger, an Alice in Wonderland fanatic living the fashion dream in her own vintage wonderland in Bournemouth...and she can drive tanks!
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She then interned at glossy magazines but although she realises now that it taught her a lot, she felt this wasn’t her passion. Taking control of her career, she launched an online clothing boutique that reflected her lifelong love of fashion. Selling oneof-a-kind vintage pieces at reasonable prices, ‘The Cherry Closet’ is a highly curated collection of covetable finds and unsurprisingly, Nicki began to be snapped up for events to show off her vintage collection.
“
My love for vintage came from the womb
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G
iggling at a computer screen with her assistant, behind a white picket fence intertwined with sunflowers, the softly lit sign above her head illuminates the words ‘We’re all mad’. You can tell that Nicki Grainger is a quirky, light-hearted character embracing all things vintage. After recently celebrating the 150th anniversary of the first telling of Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, the story still warms the hearts of us all. It is easy to see how quaint vintage hideaway, ‘What Alice Found’ is a wonderland in itself. One of Nicki’s most valued customers lingers around the shop eyeing up her next steal. "I read the quotes along the wall and it reminds me of the days when I used to read this to my children. Nicki is intelligent, unique and mad as a hatter!" she says. Nicki chuckles and winks at the customer as her expression transforms into nostalgia. She begins to recall exactly where her love of Alice originated, as it was her nickname as a child. "I was sailing with my uncle and he told me the water would be freezing so I decided to dangle my feet in the water. My uncle nicknamed me Alice because I was ‘curiouser and curiouser, I loved adventure’." Nicki’s vintage adoration began remarkably early, "My love for vintage came from the womb, I used to wear my Grandmother’s jackets to bed!" However, it took some time before Nicki realised her true calling. "I did music video production, aspiring to fit into my family’s Hollywood background but instead, absolutely hated it and changed to fashion writing."
Nicki flicks away her wispy, blonde hair to reveal a striking, feathery sandstone jumper covered in granite shapes. "I was wearing this jumper the day a vintage shop owner convinced me to open up a vintage shop" she says. After losing a close friend, she realised that life was too short so decided to set up ‘What Alice Found’ to follow her vintage dream. Due to little circulation of vintage shops in Bournemouth at the time, she became one of the new kids on the block for vintage fashion.
Nicki’s dress sense unquestionably screams vintage, as she describes her adoration for ‘crazy shirts’ with a suit jacket to give a ‘kooky’ feel to her wardrobe this season. "It’s so hard not to keep all the items I source because I love everything in here". She clearly works hard to source pieces from all over the EU and US. "I used to wear about 10 layers of clothing on the plane home so I didn’t have to pay for extra luggage!" Nicki succeeds in multitasking, also making time for freelance styling and taking on projects for hair, beauty and modeling photo shoots. Back in 2011, she styled the whole theatre production for ‘A Streetcar Named Desire’ as well as sourcing the costumes for Bestival’s performance of ‘A Midsummer Night’s Dream’. Nicki’s dream photo shoot would be military wear, complete with tanks and equipment. "I even have a certificate to be able to drive tanks!" she exclaims. The most remarkable story behind one of Nicki’s items is the story of a 1950’s wedding dress. The dress came with a picture of the original owner wearing it on her wedding day, and a woman who had just been praying for her boyfriend to propose to her saw the dress as a sign. Nicki handed her the photo frame as she believed it belonged with the dress. "Vintage is all about the thrill of the find! It is the history that fascinates me; you never know who might have worn it or the stories behind it." Words Sophie Boyden Design Alice Elizabeth Taylor NERVE | 43
FASHION
P
rinted clothing has stormed catwalks and our high streets this season. Whether it’s timeless animal prints, stripes or tartan pieces that we are seeing everywhere at the moment; prints are sure to attract the right attention. Millie Mackintosh’s fantastic wardrobe has certainly got her noticed. She has recently posted pictures on her style diary of her bold panda print coat and her Aztec printed kimono. The Made in Chelsea star is gradually becoming a style icon for younger girls as she mixes high street clothing with designer brands. Such style influences can be seen in our high street shops; take Topshop’s Autumn-Winter collection, which is full of dark abstract patterns and jazzy floral numbers. Topshop have incorporated these unique prints
into trousers, playsuits, coats and dresses. Gwen Stefani was recently spotted in a white, red and black cheetah print all-in-one jumpsuit from Topshop. This outfit earned her some serious style points and landed photos of the cleverly calculated look all over some of the top fashion blogs, were fashion followers could lust over her flamboyant print. If you spend more time online than out shopping, major UK online stores such as Boohoo and Asos have plenty of statement prints available too. As we enter the Christmas and party season embellished and textural prints of rich colours will be everywhere. Gold, maroon and navy will all be seen in abstract, quirky new prints. Stars such as Rita Ora, Kiernan Shipka and Selena Gomez have also all been spotted working the trend.
STYLE CLASH
PRINT V PLAIN
I
f a statement printed piece isn’t your thing, block colouring is also a big hit this season. Whether it is a neutral jumper teamed with jeans or a two toned t-shirt, you can still prove yourself a style hit with a simple, classic look. And when has an LBD ever not been a winner? The gorgeous supermodel Karlie Kloss has recently been gracing the red carpets in simple yet beautiful dresses. She recently wore a plain orange Michael Kors dress to the Golden Heart Awards Celebration in New York and stunned audiences at the MTV movie awards in a white crop top and pencil skirt combo. Karlie is well known for her el-
egant style and when wearing this trend, definitely proves that less is more. Plain coloured Coats and fluffy jumpers can be found everywhere as we enter the Winter season. Combining different blocked colours can make you stand out just as much as a wacky print due to the effortlessly cool persona it creates. Rihanna’s recent collection at River Island shows us that you don’t need statement prints to stand out from the crowd. Her funky collection is mainly blocked bold colours of black, white and grey. And well, if we don’t know what we’re doing, then RiRi definitely does.
Words Georgia Reed NERVE | 44
FASHION
With winter well under way and the festive season just around the corner, it’s time to plan your party wardrobe - and this year it’s all about sparkle. Nerve’s Shannon Hards showcases some of the finest indie looks. When shopping for party wear everyone has their favourite brand, River Island is a faithful merchant of glam party dresses, Topshop house some of the most cutting edge seasonal wear designs and Primark’s prices never disappoint but this Christmas, how about shopping indie? It’s never ideal when you turn up to a party in the same dress as someone else, especially if they look better than you, that’s exactly why the best dressed delve into unchartered territory for their show stopping outfits. Oh My Love, Motel and MeeMee are all relatively new on the scene, though this doesn’t detract from their style credentials.
Despite being founded in the late 90’s, my favourite brand, Motel is fairly unheard of. The brands mix of vintage, edge and quirk amount to some truly amazing pieces, here are three of my top picks for this Christmas. This dress is to die for. The body-con fit and plunge back are the perfect pairing and bound to turn heads. Add a pair of chunky platforms and you will achieve a polished party look with an effortless grunge edge.
Background Illustration Jack Carrington
On trend cuts are something that Motel undoubtedly does best. Who would have known they needed a cold shouldered, skater dress in their life, until now?! Paired with a pillar-box red pout and quirky jewellery and no one will even notice it’s a mere LBD.
Some people don’t associate print with party wear, however this rose print playsuit would bring excitement to the most boring family Xmas party. Not only would it look demure with black tights, pair it with a bare leg for a sexy club look.
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Perhaps not the most sophisticated of this party dress selection, but definitely the most fun. The bright colours and funky pattern will light up any dark Christmas night. Channel Rita Ora by adding some gold jewellery and sneakers for an on trend twist.
Oh My Love is even newer to the fashion scene, started in 2009, their fresh take on seasonal trends are a sure party pleaser. Anne Lombard, the brands creator, decided to create the brand after recognising a lack of clothing on sale that she wanted to wear herself.
Oh My Love’s saucy camisole dresses are my favourite thing about this brand. Despite being simple, this dress is a wardrobe staple and could keep you going all year round; instead of buying a new outfit change up the colour scheme of your accessories. But beware the low cut and little material makes for a very revealing dress.
Nothing says ‘party season’ like a metallic silver dress. This wrap, skater dress is such a flattering shape and would suit anyone. The slinky material and reflective colour would also help to cover any unwanted Christmas lumps and bumps. The added bonus is that silver goes with anything, so go wild with accessories! NERVE | 47
SPORT
Nerve chats to Dan Bermingham-Shaw, a second year English student whose journalistic journey has seen him go from jotting down his thoughts on football to standing alongside some of football’s biggest names. As an enthusiastic and sometimes over-passionate football fan it can become a little difficult to express your views about the latest goings on in the game without raising your voice among your friends and perhaps letting a few expletives slip through your lips. As I pondered a few years ago what I could do to express my thoughts about my favourite sport a little less aggressively, I suddenly came to the realisation that perhaps I could combine my interest in football with a relish for writing, and so I set about starting up a blog simply to pen my thoughts casually and calmly. It started off slowly, with only about fifty or so hits per article and with very little feedback from anyone in an extraordinarily competitive online market of sports writing, especially for a newcomer like myself with next to no experience in promoting my own work. Gradually, as I pestered other sports websites with my articles, asking them what they thought about them and posting them persistently on various football forums, the hits on the site began to grow. I then contacted several bigger news portals which posted all the latest sports articles on their website which garnered quite a considerable amount of traffic, and having been accepted on a few of those sites the views on my page began rolling in. Much to my satisfaction, a significantly higher number of football fans from all across the world were now reading my articles and responding with feedback via emails or comments. Exciting things started to happen when Nivea For Men emailed me asking whether I would be interested in writing an article for them promoting an event they were holding in which a team of former professional football managers and coaches would train an average pub team from Essex in preparation for a game against a team of English football legends. I jumped at the chance and was invited to a training session lead by one of the coaches, former Chelsea and Manchester United footballer, Ray Wilkins. Soon after, promoters for Wembley Stadium also asked NERVE | 48
me to do an article for them in return for a free VIP tour around the stadium with one other person, and I duly obliged. A few advertisers have also been in contact to ask for advertising space on the site in exchange for money, with an American Football Academy and the bookmakers Paddy Power both paying me for either an article with a link to their page or a visual advert to the side of the site. I was starting to find that having a little website to post my opinions on which started so innocently could be used to my advantage! Since joining university I found I was too busy to watch all of the football games and keep up with the unending on-rush of news and speculation being spurted out of the football world. Throughout my first year of university I forgot about my little side project, and unfortunately I published no articles for a painfully long time. The site still received a few hundred hits every day on old articles throughout the year, but nothing like the energetic buzz of when I was in full article-writing swing, publishing my thoughts left right and centre. This year I have got myself back on track and I am writing as much as possible in between deadlines for university and dreadful hangovers. As I approach reaching 2 million hits on the site, with my articles receiving on average of around 1,000 hits, I am gradually building back up to where I was and hope to go even further with the site. I now have a team of excellent and extremely motivated advertising students on the case, pushing me to write new articles and I am planning to re-design, update and re-brand my site to turn it into an even more popular, marketable and aesthetically pleasing website in order to really compete with the big websites and blogs out there. I certainly had no idea when I began this insignificant, unknown blog a few years ago that anything serious would come of it. But with a bit of perseverance, hard work and passion for a subject as well as a mind full of ideas wishing to be shared, something has and I can’t wait to see what else can be done with my tiny little blog.
SPORTS PERSONALITY
Ronnie O’Sullivan
This may be quite biased as ‘The Rocket’ is my sporting hero. However, to defend the World Championship at the mature age of 37 after a year’s sabbatical is truly astonishing. This excites me being a snooker fan but most people find the sport incredibly boring at times and would rather watch paint dry, or so my girlfriend tells me.
Christine Ohuruogu The comeback queen. Christine Ohuruogu triumphed at the 2013 World Championships in Moscow to brilliantly secure her second World Title. She also set a new British record in the process with a time of 49.41 seconds. Unfortunately though Christine, running round a track once isn’t hard, just ask my old P.E teacher, Mr Bourne.
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five
YEAR
The unlucky
OF THE
SPORT
With the 2013 Sports Personality of the Year on the horizon, Nerve’s Andrea Avellano picks out the sporting stars who will probably find themselves out of the running before the shortlist has even been scribbled.
Gareth Bale
Ian Bell
The most expensive footballer ever and he’s a Brit! A remarkable couple of seasons at Spurs led the boy from Cardiff to the bright lights of Madrid for a reported £85.3 million fee. The 24-year-old was named the PFA Players, Young and Football Writer’s player of the Year - a clean sweep to top a flawless year. Sorry Gareth, I don’t care how much you cost, you’re now going to spend your career living in Cristiano Ronaldo’s shadow.
Bell hit a whopping 562 runs and scored three consecutive Ashes centuries this summer, becoming only the fourth English batsman to do so. Although his performances were superb, Test cricket can last five days and a lot can be done in that time. Given the choice, I’d much rather spend it in Cannes with a cool glass of Sauvignon Blanc than see Ian Bell hit a few poxy centuries.
Justin Rose Rose became the first English golfer to win a major since 1996 when he battled his way to the US Open title earlier this year. On top of this, after finishing second in the 2013 Arnold Palmer Invitational he rose to a career high world ranking of third. As you know by now, he is part of the unlucky five and won’t be holding the SPOTY trophy, simply because he isn’t Andy Murray.
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S E T A R I P E L O PO "WE NEVER GIVE UP" SPORT
cond Elite After the Pirates won their se t month League Title in four years las with team Nerve’s Ash Hover sat down to discuss manager Neil Middle-Ditch n their rollercoaster campaig
P
oole Pirates’ 2013 elite league campaign was rocky enough to open up their own theme park as a rollercoaster season saw them secure their second title in four years. An array of injuries hit the Pirates’ season hard, with just three riders from the original chosen seven making it to the end of the campaign. Poole went into the season brimming with confidence after successive silverware winning campaigns, but found themselves sitting third from bottom at the end of May, racking up a miserable 12 points from ten meetings. A far cry from the unbeaten ten-match record they had achieved exactly a year before. Pirates promoter Matt Ford had worked tirelessly to assemble a title winning team, but his efforts looked like going down the pan after one of their poorest starts in the side’s history. "The start to this season was probably one of our worst, said team manager," Neil Middleditch. "It was strange because I felt the team we had assembled looked a competitive side, but one thing you learn in speedway is things can change very quickly. "The injury to Robert Miskowiak was the start of our problems and of course the injury to Darcy (Ward), who was very hard to replace. But I just think we didn’t really click as a unit early on.' It turned from bad to worse for the Pirates who endured a miserable June period with defeats to NERVE | 52
Lakeside and Birmingham – who they would go onto smash in the grand final at the end of the season. The Pirates were given hope when Darcy Ward returned from injury with victory in the Danish GP and teammate Chris Holder finishing third on the podium. But it would all go off track for Poole once more as Holder’s season was ended in a crunching crash that broke his heel, hip and shoulder bones; one of many injuries that hampered Poole’s season. Was 2013 just not going to be their year? Fortunately for the side, it seemed like everything that could go wrong already had. A convenient break for the Speedway World Cup helped them re-evaluate their playoff chances. "I just kept saying to the boys that the pirates never give up. Despite all the problems, one thing Matt (Ford) and I said was that we would never give up trying to reach the playoffs until it was mathematically impossible. "The terrible injury to Chris at Coventry just compounded our problems as Darcy had only just returned from his injury himself. Lesser people may have called it day at that point and I must admit we did start to think it may be a bridge too far. But we sat down and started to look at what options were left to open to us." It took an inspired move from Matt Ford to help turn their season around as he announced that he had persuaded two-time world champ
Rider’s view @GregHancock45 "Thank You Poole Pirates for an amazing ride. It’s been a blast & you gave me the opportunity to join you for a league title! #piratepride" @Chris_Holder23 "Oriite I’m done! Finally back together! Foot is quite painful at the moment but I can put up with that, surgeon said was pretty nasty!" @D_Dublu_racing "What a season for the pirates. Up n down but at the end on top #proudcaptain"
Greg Hancock to provide permanent cover for the injured Holder. Poole’s problems would not end there though, as difficulties with his immigration papers held up the move, further adding to the problematic injury-hit squad. Maciej Janowski even missed a fixture due to traffic problems in Poland. But the road ahead was starting to look a little less mudded. "Matt had spoken briefly to Greg which I feel was a masterstroke. I spoke to him again at the World Cup in Prague and said it would probably only be a few meetings unless we made the playoffs - which at that point was a long shot. Thankfully Greg agreed to join us, and even by his own admission Chris is a tough act to follow. But he slotted in seamlessly and the team spirit returned. "With Darcy now as team captain, we rose to the occasion and our luck started to change." A welcome change of fortune. Despite three ‘an-
noying’ away defeats by just seven points, Poole did enough to scrape into the playoffs, securing fourth place with a controversial victory in Manchester against Belle Vue Aces. This time luck was on their side as the result was awarded to Poole early thanks to deteriorating track conditions. Once in the playoffs, the Pirates took their chance with both hands, running out 97-90 victors against Swindon before a comprehensive points win in both legs of the final with Birmingham. Middleditch’s team had smashed the table-topping Brummies by 25 points. "Two titles in four years is a great record but we are never complacent and we will always be trying to win more. "Love or hate the pirates what you will always get is commitment and passion and as manager that is all you can ask of a team." NERVE | 53
Last month, AFC Bournemouth’s Brett Pitman celebrated a year since returning to Dean Court after a two-year absence at Bristol City. Nerve spoke to the striker about an eventful second spell with the club. A lot can happen in 12 months, just ask AFC Bournemouth’s Brett Pitman. After a two-year sabbatical exploring the West Country, his ever-blossoming love affair with the Cherries was rekindled in November 2012 when he rejoined the south coast side for an unprecedented year of success at the Goldsands Stadium. Not only did Pitman net a remarkable 19 goals in 27 games in League One last season, but he also spearheaded the side to automatic promotion despite one of the poorest starts in the club’s recent history. After a 26-goal, promotion-winning campaign in League Two during the 2009/2010 season, Pitman earned himself a move to Championship side Bristol City during the subsequent summer transfer window. Pitman rejected a bid from Blackpool to join The Robins, where his 13 goals saw him crowned the club’s top scorer in his debut season. In 2012 the striker fell out of favour with then-manager Derek McInnes and dropped down a division to return to work under Eddie Howe. The decision didn’t faze the Jersey-born man, who seamlessly merged back into the Cherries squad and resurrected his scorching goal scoring form. "Obviously I was pleased to be back and working under someone who wanted me to be there and wanted me to be part of things. There’s no secret that I enjoy working with Eddie (Howe) and I think that he gets the best out of me," he explained. "I knew the team here was good, I’d watched them a couple of times and I knew there was good players here. When Eddie first came back the run they went on was very goo, we then managed to continue that for 19 games and at any level that is really good going. On a personal level, I didn’t set myself any targets. I would have been pleased to score probably 13 to 15 goals and it worked out I got 19 last season so I was happy with that." It has become common knowledge around the Goldsands Stadium that the return of Eddie Howe was a pivotal point in last season’s promotion-winning season. Upon Howe’s return, AFC Bournemouth sat 21st and were preparing for a season flirting with relegation and an unthinkable return to League Two. Instead, Howe transformed the club’s fortunes and propelled them into a different kind of unthinkable – Championship NERVE | 54
football. Pitman is the first to recognise Howe’s drastic impact but places equal importance on a different set of characteristics. "I don’t think there’s any secret that there has been investment here and we’ve got to thank the chairman and Maxim (Denim) for that, but you’ve still got to produce it on the pitch. "You see teams all the time with money spent on them that don’t do well, but we’ve got a real good work-ethic and togetherness here which is instilled from the manager right the way through." Despite a revolutionised season that contained a 15-game unbeaten league run and a coveted 75 points from 35 games, the final day of the campaign brought a bittersweet mood to the promotion celebrations. Having drawn with Tranmere Rovers at Prenton Park, the Cherries were left relying on Brentford to not concede to secondplaced Doncaster in the final seconds of their game to secure the League One title. One of the most sensational ends to a game the country has ever seen would put paid to the Cherries chances of securing a fairytale end to their season. "We had come so close. Everyone knows what happened at Brentford and we were watching it on a little monitor on Sky Sports News. When they said that Brentford had a penalty the last thing you think is that Doncaster are going to score up the other end. Then you heard the commentator say they are going to score and then you heard them say that Doncaster have scored and you are obviously thinking how has that happened." "For a good half an hour there was huge disappointment. We wanted to be champions and I don’t think that anyone can argue that we were the best team in the league by far and I think if Eddie had taken it from the start of the season we would have got over a hundred points and I don’t think that’s an exaggeration. We were disappointed for a time but you have to look at the overall achievement and from where it was when Eddie took over, you would have taken automatic promotion." Since rejoining Howe’s side, the Cherries have now swapped places with Pitman’s former side as they play Championship football for the first time in 24 years. Bournemouth’s remarkable form showed no signs of stopping this term as they celebrated an opening day 2-1
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It’s a tough leAGUE... ...WE’VE JUST GOT TO PUT TOGETHER A FEW WINS AND SEE WHERE THAT TAKES US.
Words Craig Rodhouse & Tom Bennett win at home to Charlton Athletic, but heavy defeats against the likes of Watford and Huddersfield have been a reality check for the relatively young squad. However, Pitman believes that the side are beginning to acclimatise and is optimistic about their chances for the second half of the campaign. "We got taught a couple of harsh lessons early about how difficult and how quickly you can get found out, but I think we’ve adapted well. We’ve had good results, some not so good results where we’ve played well and not got what we deserved and maybe results where we’ve not played so well and got a bit more than we deserved. That’s the nature of this league, it’s so random and if you look at the results week in week out you can’t predict them and everybody beats everybody. "We’ve got to look to stabilise our place in this
league. That has got to be first and foremost and see what happens from there. It’s easy to get promoted and then to get relegated straight away, you see it happen to loads of teams in all the leagues so I think that has to be our first aim and then once we’re safe and we think we’re safe let’s see where that can take us. "If you put a few wins together you can be up near the playoffs, but I think it would be wrong for us as a team to expect us to turn over teams every week like we did last year. You only have to read through the teams in this league and a lot of them are established Premier League clubs who have got much bigger budgets than we have. I think we’ve held our own in this league, it’s a tough league and so we’ve just got to try to pick up a few more wins and see where it takes us." NERVE | 55
SPORT
world darts
CHAMPIONSHIPS ] S E T A DID N A C _ [THE
Words Craig Rodhouse & Andrea Avellano
T
he 2014 World Darts Championships are fast approaching. Cue the crazy fancy dress costumes, the scantily clad walk on girls and the deafening sound of intoxicated punters roaring Planet Funk’s ‘Chase the Sun’. There’s only one place to be this Christmas, but this isn’t some paltry Nativity play, it’s the infamous Alexandra Palace. But behind the bravado lies the most prestigious darts event in the sporting calendar, with the world’s best chasing the £1 million cheque. After winning an incredible 15 out of 23 World Championships before last year’s event, Phil ‘The Power’ Taylor actually entered the 2013 competition having not reached a final in the previous two years.
THE LEGEND or] l y a T
_
[Phil
There isn’t enough room on this page for what can be said of the legend that is Phil Taylor, but can he secure a 17th World Title at the mature age of 53? Currently ranked number one in the world, his record this season suggests he can. Taylor won the World Matchplay title, The Sydney Darts Masters, the World Grand Prix title in October, the Champions League title and The Masters. He will be hot favourite come December and you wouldn’t be surprised if he did go on to make it World Championship number 17. NERVE | 56
28-year-old Adrian Lewis looked to have finally wrestled the World Championship mantle away from Taylor by securing back-to-back victories at Ally Pally in 2011 and 2012. However, just when it seemed that Taylor’s days of dominance were over, the 53-year-old provided a polite reminder of his credentials last year as he overturned Dutch dynamo Michael van Gerwen in the final to regain his crown. What is for sure however, is that, unlike in previous years, success for Taylor is now no longer a sure-fire bet. The latest crop of young darts talent are nipping closely at his heels and this year’s tournament looks set to be anyone’s for the taking. Let’s have a look at the favourites.
the big game man [Raymond_ van [Barneveld ] ]
Unfortunately for the Dutchman it’s been a disappointing season by his standards and it has caused his world ranking to sink to number ten. But you simply cannot write him off no matter how bad a season he has had. Barney is a big game player and has an incredible temperament. Not everyone can win this tournament and it wasn’t a fluke when van Barneveld was successful in 2007. Everyone wants to see the old rivalry of Taylor – van Barneveld reignite and Ally Pally could be the spark that makes it happen.
THE HEAVYWEIGHT IS]
LEW _ N A I ADR
[
Adrian Lewis has always been seen as Phil Taylor’s protégée and the upcoming star in darts but it just hasn’t happened for the ‘Jackpot’. In my eyes he’s underachieved for a player of his ability and the arrival of Michael van Gerwen hasn’t helped. This season however has been hit-and-miss for the world number three, winning just the European Championship and falling short at the final hurdle at the World Matchplay, It would pleasantly surprise me if Lewis made it a hat-trick of world titles but you certainly wouldn’t put it past him. He thrives on a big stage and what bigger stage is there?
THE NEARLY MAN E]
AD ES_W
[JAM
Despite boasting an impressive seven major successes on his darting CV, James Wade has never been able to fully replicate his true form at Alexandra Palace. Regularly ranked in the world’s top five heading into the tournament, Wade has yet to reach a World Championship final and three semi-final defeats mark his best displays in the competition. However, the tide does look to be turning ever so slightly for Wade. Two out of three of Wade’s semi-final spots have come in the last two years and ‘The Machine’ was defeated only by a rampant Michael van Gerwen in last year’s event.
THE RISING STAR N]
_VA L E A [MICH EN] W [GER
After a largely uneventful start to his PDC darts existence, Michael van Gerwen has seen his career thrust forward at a frightening speed in the last year. Placed 38 in the world at the beginning of 2012, ‘Mighty Mike’ is now ranked second heading into this year’s tournament. Darts supremoes are widely predicting that van Gerwen is already well on his way to immortality within the sport. The 24-year-old hit a sensational 17 perfect darts in last year’s World Championship semi-final against James Wade and his electric style of play has made him favourite in the eyes of many heading into the tournament.
THE SURPRISE PACKAGE [DAV
E_CH
ISNAL
L]
World number seven Dave Chisnall may not yet have a major win etched next to his name, but a strong 2013 has proved to many inside the sport that he is not far away from changing that statistic. After reaching the quarter finals at the World Matchplay, 33-year-old Chisnall came mightily close to breaking his major duck at the World Grand Prix as he beat world number two Michael Van Gerwen en route to a final showdown against Phil Taylor. It would be very foolish to completely rule him out of the running for this year’s Championships. NERVE | 57
SPORT
Women’s Netball
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become much more stable this season, she admits that the jump up a division has proved to be much more difficult than initially anticipated and she is now aiming towards a different set of targets. "It’s been really hard. In our first match we lost by 60 goals, they were the best team I’ve played against since I was 16. It was Bath Seconds, but they train with their super league team which is basically in netballing terms, the Premier League. The England captain plays in the super league so they’ll be trialling and training week in week out. It was a bit of a shock to the system but we can only get better. "The aim is to remain in the league. There’s no way we’re going to win it so staying in the league is the main aim. If we can pick up wins against teams we’ve lost against already and then just try and get within half of their score; because ifyou get within half of their score you get a point. So maybe against teams like Bath trying to get within half of their score will help us stay in the league come the end of the season." However, despite the strong baptism of fire that has greeted their entry into the Western 1 Division, the side has more than enough reasons to look ahead with optimism as a number of exciting prospects begin to turn out for the side. "We have one of our freshers Alice Shaw who plays goal attack and she’s a very good player. She’s represented England Under 21’s indoor netball which is a slightly different type of the game so she’s one to look out for. Then our captain Megan Pleva, she’s a goal defence and has got such a jump that she’s probably the one who gets the most interceptions and is the one to most look out for in the team." With the undoubted quality at their disposal and a new-look team beginning to find their way together, the season looks to be heading only in one direction for the side. Upwards.
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D
espite a sensational double winning season last year, the BU Netball team’s start to the new campaign didn’t actually arrive in the most ideal of circumstances. If the step up to the Western 1 Division wasn’t already enough to provide a stiff test, the side have also had to contend with losing a strong contingent of the team that secured promotion last season. Goal keeper Jess Long now cuts one of the most experienced figures in the squadbut recognises the heavy challenges that the side will face this season if they areto recover from a shaky start to the campaign. "We lost our two captains. This season there was only three of us left. We now have four or five freshers in the team so it’s a completely new team so that hasn’t helped. If we had gone up with our team from last year we probably wouldn’t have been losing," said Long. "It takes a while to gel and especially if you’ve got people coming in with the defence and the attack and inside the circle it’s like you need to get the partnership going and it takes a while for it to go. We’ve only been training twice a week and there’s only one match a week so it’s hard to get the partnerships right. When it’s only seven of you, it’s such a small number and everyone works off each other and it’s hard to get the team working again." And Long epitomises the work-ethic she speaks about. Despite playing goal keeper this season, she spent the majority of the previous campaign in between defensive positions, plugging potentially disastrous gaps in the seven throughout the course of the year. "The biggest change for me was switching from a wing defence to a goal keeper because you’re playing in and out of the circle. But interchange between goal defence and goal keeper you do that during the game anyway so it’s not that much of a difference." Although Long has seen her own position in the side
It was a bit of a shock to the system but we can only get better
Words Craig Rodhouse
NERVE | 59
With McBusted taking centre stage with their big reunion announced last month, we looked at groups which really put the ‘great’ in Great British Boybands!
BOYBANDS WE HAVE GROWN TO LOVE
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JLS As runners-up on The X Factor in 2008 to Alexandra Burke, no one could have predicted quite how successful JLS would be. They did so well off the back of the show that Alexandra actually ended up as their support act on tour... awkward. Despite arguably falling into the shadow of One Direction, the group have released twelve singles, and all but two reached the Top 10 in the UK charts. However, the end of 2013 will also see the end of a music career for JLS. Five years after their X Factor success put them in the spotlight, they have called it a day and will split after their Greatest Hits Tour, which concludes on 22nd December in London.
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The Wanted Following the immense success of debut single ‘All Time Low’, after forming in late 2009, The Wanted have proved themselves as one of Britain’s most-loved boy groups. After successfully breaking America, the five-piece have found fame globally. Following the release of three albums and twelve singles, the group have now sold over 9 million singles worldwide. Nathan, Max, Tom, Siva and Jay even had cameras following their stay in LA this year, as they produced their latest album, resulting in the airing of television programme, ‘The Wanted Life’. Next
year will also see the group embark on their first world tour, ‘Word Of Mouth’. If boybands are your thing, they are even coming to the BIC on 31st March.
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Boyzone Okay, so they’re not technically British but the Irish group are placed as the second most successful UK boyband ever, so they must not be forgotten. Prior to pursuing different paths between 2001 and 2007, and the tragic passing of member Stephen Gately in 2008, Boyzone achieved eight UK Number One singles. The first compilation album they released, ‘By Request’ (1999) sold over 1.8million copies in the UK alone – the fifth best-selling album by a boy group in British history (after four of Take That’s). They are currently on a UK arena tour, ‘BZ20’ which is to celebrate twenty years since the band was formed in 1993. The tour comes to Bournemouth’s BIC on 4th and 5th December.
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One Direction Love them or loathe them, no one can deny that One Direction are one of the hottest boybands around at the moment. After placing only third on The X Factor in 2010 to Joe McElderry and Rebecca Ferguson (who are they again?), Liam, Harry, Niall, Zayn and Louis have
FEATURES
Words: Hannah Dix
become famous in pretty much every country on the planet. Their first album, ‘Up All Night’ sold 4.5 million copies worldwide and the band managed to sweep up all nine Teen Choice Awards they were nominated for last year. The group are thought to be collectively worth an estimated £25million – not too bad for a group that didn’t exist just over three years ago!
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Take That No boyband top 5 is complete without Take That. The band was first formed nearly 25 years ago, when Robbie Williams was just 16 years old. Since then, the band has become the most successful boyband (okay, man-band) in UK chart history, with an incredible eleven number one singles and seven number one albums. After splitting in the mid 1990s, and taking a ten-year hiatus, the group reformed in 2005, releasing ‘Patience’ and embarking on an Ultimate Tour. Take That performed an epic eight nights at Wembley Stadium on their 2011 Progress Tour, breaking the record previously set by Michael Jackson. The band is due to start recording their seventh studio album at the beginning of 2014.
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