Serious, Independence Edition, 2022

Page 1

S tr ee t
ti
 T ak eo v er ‑
Mayor ECONOMY



|




EDUCATION Br eaking
the My th
o f
 Japa ‑
A G I
C ome
In
P eac e 01 ‑
A G
JOHN
NEEDS
TO
MAKE
A
 BANK
TRANSACTION ...OR
JUMP
ON
A
BRT
AND
 SPEND
TRANSPORT
MONEY ...OR
JUST
USE
ONEBANK FROM
HIS
COMFY
SOFA. WHICH
DO
YOU RECOMMEND? HE
CAN
CHOOSE
TO
 JUMP
ON
A
DANFO... ...TO
VISIT
THE
BRANCH.
 BUT
THEN,
THERE‛S
TRAFFIC! I 'm
 a
 survivor ,
 I 'm
 not
 gon '
 give
 up,
 I 'm
 not
 gon '
 stop,
 I 'm
 gon '
 work
 harder! This
 is
 the
 anthem
 for
 the
 rest
 of
 the
 year 
Nigeria
is
singing
it
and
we;
the
people
ar e
 chorusing
 with
 our
 country E very
 Independence
 Day when
 we
 r eflect
 on
 the
 state
 of
 things,
 it
 looks
 the
 same,
 but
 Nigeria
 has
 changed
 and
 is
 changing‑
 for
 good.
 Our
 ashes
 will
 be
 turned
 to
 beauty ,
 we
 just
 need
 to
 go
 thr ough
 the
 fir e
 first.
 Someone
 tweeted
 'this
 country
 is
 going
 to
 sh**'
 and
 honestly ,
 I
 could
 be
 talking
 about
 any
 country
 in
 the
 world
 right
 now'.
 This
 is
 true
 –
 the
 UK
 Pound
 and
 US
 Dollar
 ar e
 almost
 1:1,
 Liz
 check ed
 out
 and
 everything
 is
 crumbling
 ther e…God
 save
 us.
 In
 this
 edition,
 we
 curated
 information
 to
 help
 you
 mak e
 daily
 decisions
 e.g.,
 should
 FIRS
 start
collecting
tax
fr om
MC
Oluomo
and
co,
will
you
have
learnt
the
lyrics
to
the
new
 Asak e
 song
 befor e
 the
 next
 one
 is
 r eleased,
 ar e
 you
 cutting
 back
 on
 your
 meat
 intak e,
 do
 you
 have
 your
 PVC
 because
 if
 you
 don't,
 we
 will
 be
 in
 fir e
 for
 a
 longer
 while
 –
 tak e
 your
 civic
 duty
 seriously
 and
 of
 course
 not
 everyone
 is
 leaving
 Nigeria
 as
 social
 media
 is
 purporting. Anyway ,
 I
 leave
 you
 with
 lyrics
 from
 the
 ver y
 sonorous
 Destiny's
 Child
 because
 we
 all
 need
 the
 luck
 from
 these
 words: Wishin '
 you
 the
 best,
 pray
 that
 you
 are
 blessed,
 Much
 success,
 no
 stress,
 and
 lots
 of
 happiness Essen tially ,
do
no t
despair ,
everyone
is
going
 thr ough
it
in
one
way
or
ano ther

ome

eac e

Happy
Buffday

The

desert;
 Angola
 is
 busy
 lending
 money
 to
 its
 colonisers,
 and
 then
 ther e
 is
 us…
 Let's
 just
 say
 we
 ar e
 not
 making
 the
 most
 of
 this
 boom.

Billings
Galore

The
 pr esidency
 has
 been
 very
 active
 in
 r ecent
 times;
 at
 some
 point,
 Pr esident
 Buhari
 was
 in
 the
 US ,
 while
 Uncle
 Y emi
 was
 in
 the
 UK.
 However ,
 something
 important
 happened

However in
 this
 Nigeria,
 ther

is
 always
 gist.
 It's
 why
 the
 most
 popular
 accounts

social
 media

gossip
 platforms.
 All
 hail
 Nigeria,
 agba
 c

independence
 celebration, tuale for
 the
 birthday
 boy!
 62
 looking
 22!
 W e
 celebrate
 our
 fr eedom
 fr om
 the
 queen;
 long
 live
 the
 king.

Birthdays
 ar e
 a
 good
 time
 to reminisce
 lik e
 alaga
 and
 spray
 pure
 water on
 the
 celebrant
 (tr enches
 mode).
 A
 nation's
 independence
 is
 always
 a
 good
 thing
 to
 commemorate,
 and
 this
 one
 is
 no
 ex ception.
 Our
 positive
 GDP
 r eport
 of
 3 .54%
 shows
 our
 r esilience
 in
 the
 middle
 of
 a
 global
 r ecession.
 For
 the
 first
 time
 in
 over
 five
 years,
 we
 also
 exported
 mor e
 than
 we
 imported
 (even
 if
 it's
 just
 oil).
 And
 the
 best
 news
 of
 all;
 Ololade
 Mr
 Money
 has
 continued
 to
 give
 us bangers. At
 least
 even
 in
 our
 sapa‑dominated
 society we
 would
 still
 dance Joha.

Stop
the
Count

D e s p i t e o u r l i t t l e v i c t o r i e s , i n fl a t i o n c o n t i n u e s t o d e f e a t u s Remember
 when
 we
 complained
 that
 it
 was
 too
 high
 at
 11%,
 the
 last
 figur e
 by
 the
 NBS
 was
 20 .5%,
 with
 food
 prices
 rising
 by
 23 .1%.
 The
last
time
inflation
was
this
high
was
in
2005 ,
so
it's
really
a
big
 deal. But bad
 as
 e
 bad, we
 ar e
 not
 even
 in
 the
 top
 10
 countries
 with
 the
 highest
 inflation
 rates
 –
 this
 one
 is gbogbo
 ero
 in flation
 (e
 touch

While
 the
 UK
 is
 fully
 in
 billing
 season,
 the
 federal
 government
 of
 Nigeria
 is
 avoiding
 its
 own
 with
 all
 ferocity
 as
 regards
 ASUU At
 some
 point,
 we
 need
 to
 have
 a
 conversation
 of
 who
 strik es
 better;
 Thor ,
 Sango
 or
 ASUU .

E ver ywhere
R

The
 truth
 is
 that
 some
 things
 are
 not
 good
 but
 at
 rock
 bottom,
 how
 werser
 can
 it
 get?

3 62
e
on
ar e
o n t e n t c r e a t o r T h e b i g g e s t g i s t t o d a y h o w e v e r i s o u r
everybody). Do
Y ou
Have
 a
Hoil? Oil
 prices
 have
 since
 cr ossed
 the
 $100
 per
 barr el
 mark,
 whether
 we'r e
 making
 the
 most
 fr om
 it
 is
 a
 question
 for
 the
 gods.
 Despite
 the
 oil
 boom,
 our
 pr oduction
 has
 dr opped
 significantly ,
 falling
 below
 Angola
 and
 Libya,
 all
 thanks
 to
 theft
 and
 bunk ering;
 mor e
 than
 300 , 000
 b a r r e l s h a v e b e e n s t o l e n d a i l y I m e a n , t h e r e i s h o p e ; w i t h
 government
 T ompolo,
 a
 former
 militant,
 getting
 the
 contract
 to
 safeguard
 our
 pipelines,
 what
 could
 go
 wr ong?
 I
C
In
P
‑
A G
painful
 thing
 is
 that
 with
 this
 oil
 boom,
 Saudi
 is
 busy
 building
 a
 sustainable
 city
 in
 the
 middle
 of
 the
that
 pr obably
 went
 under
 the
 curtains.
 Just
 in
 August,
 Pr esident
 Buhari
 signed
 eight
 bills
 passed
 by
 the
 national
 assembly These
 bills
 cover
 policy
 changes
 for
 pr ofessions
 lik e
 counselling,
 aviation,
 social
 works.
 It's
 not
 only
 Mr
 Pr esident
 who
 dealt
 with
 bills.
 With
 the
 queen's
 death,
 we
 hear
 that
 burial
 arrangements
 cost
 the
 UK
 at
 least
 $9
 million;
 with
 the
 cost
 of
 living
 and
 inflation
 alr eady
 up,
 they
 ar e
 r eally
 going
 thr ough
 it.
ed E ver ything
 don
 cost; it's
 the
 story
 of
 the
 world
 today;
 the
 cost
 of
 living
 has
 basically
 shot
 up
 by
 mor e
 than
 200%,
 according
 to
 the
 Consumer
 W atch
 Index.
 E ven
 the
 richest
 man
 in
 the
 world,
 Elon
 Musk,
 is
 feeling
 it.
 After
 agr eeing
 to
 buy
 T witter man
 is
 having
 a
 r ethink.
 W orse
 still,
 T witter
 is
 witnessing
 its
 worst
 security
 br each
 in
 years,
 we
 dey
 obsa f Sapa
 has
 hit
 everybody;
 even
 Ferrari,
 which
 used
 to
 only
 mak e
two‑door
cars,
is
now
doing
four ‑door;
they
must
sha
appeal
 to
 the
 mass
 mark et.
 As
 things
 ar e
 r ed,
 Russian
 men
 ar e
 running
 away
 fr om
 the
 country
 because
 of
 mobilization;
 things
 ar e
 r eally
 r ed. Naija
R ocks I n t h i s l i fe , t h re e t h i n g s a re c o n s t a n t : O n e B a n k b e i n g re l i a b l e ,
 Bar celona
 losing
 to
 Bayern
 Munich
 and
 people japaing. Y ou
 people
 ar e
 taking
 this japa seriously;
 the
 Ministry
 of
 Interior
 says
 passport
 issuance
 has
 risen
 by
 38%
 since
 the
 start
 of
 the
 year They
 also
 say
 mor e
 than
 5 000
 Nigerians
 have
 r elocated
 since
 the
 beginning
 of
 the
 year;
 you
 people
 should
 be
 calming
 down. For
 those
 that
 ar e
 still
 her e
 or
 have
 had
 their
 visa
 applications
 r ejected,
 ther e
 is
 hope
 that
 Nigeria
 will
 be
 better ,
 especially
 as
 the
 r eason
 most
 young
 Nigerians
 have
 not
 been
 passionate
 about
 the
 country
 Big
 Br other
 –
 is
 finally
 coming
 to
 an
 end.
 Lik e
 the
 famous
 writer
 says,
 east
 to
 west;
 Nigeria
 is
 the
 best.
 W e
 have
 struggled
 but
 with
 the
 election,
 ther e
 seems
 to
 be
 a
 new
 light
 at
 the
 end
 of
 the
 tunnel;
 a
 new
 beginning
 and
 an
 opportunity
 to
 mak e
 a
 change. Lets
 mak e
 use
 of
 our
 PVC
 for
 that
 change.
 The
 world
 is
 an
 intriguing
 place
 to
 be
 oh.
 On
 some
 days,
 a
 year's
 worth
 of
 events
 can
 happen
 in
 a
 day ,
 and
 on
 other
 days,
 nothing
 happens
 at
 all 01 F rom
 the
 US ,
 UK
 to
 the
 rest
 of
 Europe,
 nobody
 is
 ex cluded
 from
 the
 cold
 hands
 of
 increased
 prices.
 As
 we
 approach
 the
 ember
 months
 and
 winter ,
 e n e r g y p r i c e s c o u l d s o a r e v e n m o r e a c r o s s
 Europe;
 maybe
 they
 should
 start
 looking
 at
 coal?

E ver y
 countr y's
 economic
 journey
 begins
 from
 somewhere,
 you
 know ,
 started
 from
 the
 bottom
 now
 they
 are
 here.

Think
 about
 it,
 befor

the

and

So,
 if
 this
 sector
 is
 this
 big
 and
 this
 important;
 why
 then
 ar e
 is
 the
 government
 not
 making
 the
 most
 of
 it.

In
 any
 society ,
 the
 two
 hardest
 things
 to
 do
 for
 the
 informal
 sector
 is
 regulate
 and
 tax.
 It's
 lik e
 looking
 for
 an
 honest
 politician.

Its
 why
 despite
 been
 worth
 mor e
 than
 $1.2
 trn,
 the
 tax
 caption
 is
 bar ely
 5%.
 Y es,
 Nigeria
 has
 a
 bad
 tax
 cultur e
 sha;
 even
 the
 organiz ed
 formal
 sector
 is
 only
 about
 9%
 tax ed.
 But
 why
 is
 taxing
 the
 informal
 sector
 even
 important
 for
 the
 government
 considering
 that
 it
 has
 continued
 to
 flourish
 without
 their
 interfer ence?

we
 had
 smaller

that
 formed
 the

of
 our
 society

T o
 improve
 our
 common
 welfare,
 it
 is
 paramount
 for
 us
 as
 citiz ens
 to
 do
 our
 duties
 as
 people
 with
 government
 doing
 their
 own
 too.

5
e
big
 scr eens
 on
 W all
 Str eet
Br oad
 Str eet;
unstructur ed
 businesses
backbone
It
 is
 why
 unstructur ed
 businesses
 continue
 to
 be
 a
 significant
 driver
 of
 employment
 and
 development
 even
 in
 the
 most
 developed
 economies.
 For
 Nigeria
 and
 other
 developing
 countries,
 they
 ar e
 even
 mor e
 m a s s i v e a n d n e c e s s a r y. A c c o r d i n g t o t h e I n t e r n a t i o n a l L a b o u r
 Organization, 85 8%
 of
 employment
 is
 informal,
 and
 we
 have
 heard
 that
 the
 sector
 mak es
 up
 about
 50%
 of
 our
 GDP the
 highest
 in
 Africa. Started
F rom
The
Bottom E v e r y m e m b e r of t h e i nfo r m a l s e c t o r p a y s s o m e fo r m of t a x Association
 oh,
 local
 government
 and
 the
 lik es.
 So,
 it
 is
 not
 that
 they
 ar e
 tax ‑fr ee.
 However most
 of
 that
 money
 is
 lost
 with
 the
 babas
 and
 mamas
 of
 middle
 management.
 Y o u r t a x i s s u p p o s e d t o h e l p i m p r o v e a n d m a i n t a i n p u b l i c
 infrastructur e
 and
 even
 security The
 poor er
 the
 government
 the
 poor er
 the
 maintenance
 of
 those
 structur es.
 In
 Nigeria's
 case,
 oil
 was
 always
 enough
 but
 these
 days ; na
 sapa
 dey
 reign. Its
 why
 we
 ar e
 pr oud
 to
 talk
 about
 ,
 we
 hear
 that
 it
 is
 specifically
TBH made
 for
 informal
 and
 small
 businesses.
 Y ou
 see
 it's
 not
 just
 talks,
 we
 gat
 you. Already
Billed

It's
 not
 that
 nobody
 has
 thought
 about
 this,
 but
 it's
 not
 so
 easy
 to
 do.
 The
truth
is
that
businesses
in
the
informal
sector
lack
support
fr om
 the
 government,
 so
 you
 can't
 exactly
 r eap
 wher e
 you
 did
 not
 sow It's
 also
 very
 difficult
 to
 sufficiently
 know
 the
 amount
 of
 businesses
 ther e
 sef

Let's
 not
 begin
 to
 talk
 about
 the
 lack
 of
 transpar ency underG money
 and
 multiple
 tax es
 monitor ed
 by
 association; underG money
 that
 doesn't
 get
 to
 the
 government
 but
 is
 only
 spent
 by
 territorial
 landlords
 who
 enfor ce
 the
 fees
 thr ough
 for ce
 and
 fear

out
 the
 best
 way
 to
 tax
 the
 informal
 sector
 and
 mak

W e
 then
 need
 to

that
 whatever
 tax
 is
 paid

of

In
 Ghana,
 for
 example,
 with

compar

fr

them.

Brazil,
 on
 the
 other

document

few

eturns
 to
 mak

the
 sector
 better
 rather
 than
 in
 the
 pock

beat
 them,

Simples
 initiative,

technology

operation
 and
 understand
 the
 sector

chance
 to

There
 is
 also
 the
 good
 part
 of
 ensuring
 that
 small
 businesses
 are
 not
 overtax ed.
 Outside
 of
 the
 gains
 for
 government,
 taxation
 helps
 to
 develop
 the
 informal
 sector
 and
 improve
 one
 of
 Nigeria's
 most
 important
 spaces.

6
figur e
e
 sur e
r
e
ets
a
88%
 informal
 employment;
 tax es
 ar e
 collected
 thr ough
 associations
 and
 gr oups.
 Its
 tax ‑to‑ GDP
 is
 9 .2%
ed
 to
 6 .3%
 for
 Nigeria.
 At
 least
 if
 you
 can't
learn
om
hand
 thr ough
 its
issues
 one
covering
 all
 the
 tax es
 per
 household;
 a
 copy
 is
 shar ed
 acr oss
 all
 levels
 of
 government.
 With
,
 ther e
 is
 even
 a
first
 understand
 the
 mode
 of
A
new
digital banking
 experienc e! Open
an
account
to
transact,
 sa ve,invest,
borr ow
and
earn One Bank It’s
Not
Easy Where
T o
Start
F rom
A
community
that
intersects
between
pop
 culture
and
finance,
a
world
where
you
live
 on
your
terms
and
you
are
 
anyone
free
to
be you
want
to
be. Follow
us
 Earn.
Learn.
Fun Introducing TrybeOne

If

o
A
New
Dispensation

Despite
 how
 popular japa
 has
 become;
 people
 don't
 r eally
 talk
 about
 the
 inher ent
 cost
 of
 japa.
 Japa
 in
 itself
 is
 not
 for
 the
 faint‑hearted!
 Apart
 fr om
 the
 cost
 of
 losing
 skilled
 r esour ces
 for
 the
 economy nobody
 talks
 about
 the
 division
 that
 happens
 among
 families
 and
 friends.

abr oad

the

eally
 call
 yourself

true
 Nigerian?

Think
 about
 it.
 I
 can't
 even
 count
 the
 number
 of
 times
 I
 have
 seen
 Sola
 Sobowale's
 “W elcome
 to
 a
 new
 dispensation”
 meme
 on
 people's
 feeds
 and
 stories.
 Las
 las,
 the
 last
 person
 to
 leave
 Nigeria
 should
 turn
 off
 the
 light
 because o
 por! As
 popular
 as japa has
 become,
 a
 short
 trip
 down
 memory
 lane
 will
 show
 you
 that
 ther e
 is
 nothing
 new
 about
 the
 concept
 of japa, apart
 fr om
 the
 slang
 itself

T

e

a t

When
 the
 elders
 say
 that
 20
 childr en
 don't
 play
 together
 for
 20
 years
 –
 they
 wer e
 r eferring
 to
 the
 effects
 of japa. Inter estingly
 this japa issue
 is
 not
 a
 Nigerian
 thing
 alone;
 I
 even
 dar e
 to
 say
 we
 ar e
 not
 even
 in
 the
 top
 20
 countries
 with
 migration wahala.

According
 to
 the
 International
 Organisation
 of
 Migration,
 Egypt
 is
 even
 the
 only
 African
 country
 in
 the
 top
 20 in
 terms
 of
 international
 migrants
 ar ound
 the
 world.
 In
 fact,
 Africa
 is
 behind
 Asia,
 Eur ope
 and
 North
 America.
 This
 is
 because
 unlik e
 those
 continents,
 the
 barrier
 of
 entry
 is
 higher
 for
 Africans;
 and
 for
 Nigerians,
 the
 pr essur e
 is
 even werser!

gr own
 by
 over

since
 2016

it's
 a
 case
 of
 ther e
 is
 nothing
 new
 under
 the
 sun
 –
 apart
 fr om
 this
 new
 edition
 of
 Serious
 (*winks*).This
 time
 we
 tell
 the
 story
 of
 japa
 the
 way
 no
 one
 says
 it.
 W e
 br eak
 the
 japa
 myth.

Japa
No
Be
T

The
 older
 generation
 (Millennials and
 GenX) will
 r emember
 the
 popular
 T V
 advert
 on
 NT A
 (well
 nobody
 is
 watching
 that
 one
 again) wher e
 a
 man
 named
 Andr ew
 pack ed
 up
 his
 things
 to
 leave
 because
 he
 was
 tir ed
 of
 the
 country His
 people
 begged
 him
 not
 to
 go,
 saying
 that
 Nigeria
 would

 be
 gr eat
 again.

In
 those
 days,
 even
 though
 leaving
 Nigeria
 was
 easier
 than
 it
 is
 today
 (just
 go
 to
 the
 US
 embassy),
 it
 was
 easier
 to
 convince
 fictional
 Andr ew
 not
 to
 leave
 with
 pr omises
 of
 a
 better
 Nigeria.
 It
 was
 a
 matter
 of
 gr eat
 concern
 to
 the
 government
 that
 young
 skilled
 work ers
 wer e
 leaving,
 so
 much
 so
 that
 the
 government
 started
 putting
 out
 campaigns
 to
 encourage
 people
 to
 stay

It
 is
 even
 on
 r ecord
 that
 federal
 government
 delegates
 went
 on
 tours
 of
 the
 US
 and
 the
 UK
 to

Most
 people
 who
 encourage
 Nigerians
 to
 tak e
 the
 bold
 step
 forget
 how
 expensive
 japa
 is,
 so
 in
 our
 habit
 of
 not
 minding
 our
 business,
 we
 have
 tried
 to
 calculate
 what
 it
 will
 cost
 using
 the
 most
 popular
 r oute
 today

Again
 we
 ar e
 just
 thinking
 out
 loud (not
 pro‑japa
 but
 T oronto
 is
 sweet
 at
 this
 time
 of
 the
 year).
 F r om
 the
 time
 you
 thInk
 about japaing to
 the
 day
 you
 settle
 in
 a
 new
 country;
 one
 thing
 that
 will
 be
 constant
 is
 billing.
 Whether
 its
 school;
 billing,
 work;
 billing, gbogbotigbo; billing.

While
 many
 Nigerians
 desir e
 to
 move
 abr oad,
 a
 huge
 per centage
 of
 the
 population
 can't
 aff or d
 to
 pay
 the
 costs
 associated
 with
 this
 journey So,
 yeah,
 many
 people
 will japa, but
 even
 mor e
 will
 r emain.

W elcome
T
oday!
at
 this
 point
 you
 don't
 have
 at
 least
 one
 r elative
 or
 friend
 in
 the
or
 planning
 to
 go
 befor e
end
 of
 the
 year ,
 can
 you
 r
a
convince
 Nigerians
 to
 come
 back
 home
 –
 nowadays?
 God
 abeg! “ The
 biggest
 driver
 of
 japa
 is
 sapa” ‑
 Unknown
 Nigerian
h
r
e o f s k i l l e d a n d s t u d e n t m i g r a t i o n h a s
400%
,
02 Br eaking
the My th
o f
 Japa ‑
A G 8 Nigerians
Are
Not
Japaing
As
Much
As
Y ou
Think! Japa
Is
Not
For
The
Poor

studying

in
the
uk 9 F unny
 as
 it
 sounds,
 ther e
 ar e
 still
 a
 ton
 of
 people
 who
 believe
 in
 Nigeria
 and
 mor e
 people
 who
 would
 r eturn
 because
 frankly ,
 ther e
 is
 hope
 that
 Nigeria
 would
 be
 better W e
 lik e
 to
 look
 at
 the
 negatives
 very
 often
 that
 new
 forget
 the
 opportunity
 that
 this
 japa
 pr esents
 especially
 to
 the
 unemployed
 and
 skilled
 labour
 that
 r emains
 who
 now
 have
 better
 opportunities.
 The
 adverts
 have
 changed,
 and
 the
 barrier
 of
 entry
 has
 been
 lower ed.
 In
 case
 you
 sha
 japa
 and
 you
 want
 to
 k eep
 sending
 money
 to
 family
 and
 friends,
 please
 bik o
 check
 S wit ch W e
 sha
 know
 that
 no
 matter
 the
 number
 of
 people
 that
 japa,
 Nigeria
 will
 continue
 to
 churn
 out
 skilled
 r esour ces;
 at
 least
 when
 ASUU
 is
 not
 striking.
 More
People
Will
People Sour ce:
Sterling
BI
T ha nk
Y o u! I
hope
you
enjoyed
being
 ‘Serious.’
 Always
r emember , 
shar e
your
Never personal
details
with
anyone.
Be
sa f e!
 serious @sterling.ng Y
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