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T HE WRITERS P LACE Find your writing tribe at The Writers Place. Open to the public at: 3607 Pennsylvania KCMO (816) 753-1090

E D I T O R I A L Editor Scott Wilson Managing Editor Justin Kendall Music Editor David Hudnall Staff Writers Charles Ferruzza, Ben Palosaari Editorial Operations Manager Deborah Hirsch Proofreader Brent Shepherd Calendar Editor Berry Anderson Clubs Editor Abbie Stutzer Food Blogger, Web Editor Jonathan Bender Contributing Writers Danny Alexander, Aaron Carnes, Kyle Eustice, April Fleming, Ian Hrabe, Megan Metzger, Chris Parker, Lorna Perry, Nadia Pﬂaum, M.T. Richards, Nancy Hull Rigdon, Dan Savage, Brent Shepherd, Nick Spacek, Abbie Stutzer, Kent Szlauderbach, Crystal K. Wiebe A R T Art Director Ashford Stamper Contributing Photographers Angela C. Bond, Cameron Gee, Forester Michael, Chris Mullins, Lauren Phillips, Sabrina Staires, Matthew Taylor, Brooke Vandever Interns Lauren Cook, Bethany Day, Paul Kisling P R O D U C T I O N Production Manager Jaime Albers Multimedia Design Specialist Amber Williams Multimedia Designer Christina Riddle C L A S S I F I E D A D V E R T I S I N G Senior Multimedia Specialist Steven Suarez Multimedia Specialist Andrew Disper Sales Manager Lisa Kelley R E T A I L A D V E R T I S I N G Advertising Director Dawn Jordan Retail House Account Manager Eric Persson Multimedia Specialists Michelle Acevedo, Payton Hatﬁeld, Laura Newell Sales Associate Kirin Arnold Director of Marketing & Operations Jason Dockery Advertising Coordinator Keli Sweetland

Sunday, January 1, 2012 Noon to Midnight New Year's Day Open Mic Join host Sharon Eiker for a day of open mic readings and music. Enjoy special New Year's food and interaction with other celebrative writers and musicians. Sunday, January 8 2:00 - 4:00 pm Art Inspiring Art-Ekphrastic Poetry at the Nelson-Atkins Museum Learn about using visual art as an inspiration for your poetry then get right to work by viewing pieces in the museum. Meet in Rozzelle Court. Email mpond3@kc.rr.com with questions or if you plan to attend.

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Saturday, January 14, 20126:30 - 8:30 HOME: A Juried Exhibition (Opening of Exhibition) Presented at The Writer's Place by P&M Artworks, owned and operated by Patricia B. Glenn and Michael J. Pronko, MD. Artists from the greater metropolitan Kansas City area have submitted work in a variety of media dealing with the topic of HOME and what meaning that has for them. Heather Lustfeldt, Pauline Verbeek-Cowert and Patricia B. Glenn judged the nearly 40 entries and have selected 13 for the competition. Opening night, the first, second and third place winners will be announced and will receive cash rewards. Subsequent meetings in February and March will center on artist's talks and readings about HOME . The exhibition will be shown until March 9th and all winning entries will be shown on the P&M Artworks website www.pm-artworks.com All pieces will available for sale.

S O U T H C O M M Chief Executive Ofﬁcer Chris Ferrell Director of Accounting Todd Patton Director of Operations Susan Torregrossa Director of Content/Online Development Patrick Rains Creative Director Heather Pierce N A T I O N A L A D V E R T I S I N G Voice Media Group 888-278-9866, voicemediagroup.com Senior Vice President Sales Susan Belair Senior Vice President Sales Operations Joe Larkin National Sales Director Ronni Gaun B A C K PA G E . C O M Vice President Sales & Marketing Carl Ferrer Business Manager Jess Adams Accountant David Roberts D I S T R I B U T I O N The Pitch distributes 45,000 copies a week and is available free throughout Greater Kansas City, limited to one copy per reader. Additional copies may be purchased for $5 each, payable at The Pitch’s ofﬁce in advance. The Pitch may be distributed only by The Pitch’s authorized independent contractors or authorized distributors. No person may, without prior written permission of The Pitch, take more than one copy of each week’s issue. Mail subscriptions: $22.50 for six months or $45 per year, payable in advance. Application to mail at second-class postage rates is pending at Kansas City, MO 64108. C O P Y R I G H T The contents of The Pitch are Copyright 2011 by KC Communications, LLC. No portion may be reproduced in whole or in part by any means without the express written permission of the publisher.

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Frosty’s Winter Wonderland is now available in a glistening Remastered Deluxe Edition. You can also pick up Twas The Night Before Christmas – now on Blu Ray for the first time ever. Pick up these great holiday titles from Warner Home Video – and enjoy them with

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

The year in vinyl, as told by the musicians and artists making it.

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Frosty’s Winter Wonderland From beloved song to animated holiday classic –

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The Pitch Questionnaire

G A R Y N E A L J O H N S O N

takes up a lot of space in my iTunes: ’50s music

Occupation: Actor Hometown: Kansas City Current neighborhood: Northern Overland Park

What movie do you watch at least once a year? To Kill a Mockingbird, whenever I can. What local tradition do you do every year? I’ve seen A Christmas Carol at KC Repertory Theatre almost every year for 31 years — always up close!

What career would you choose in an alternate reality? Cowboy poet

Celebrity you’d like to take on a Mamba ride: Ann-Margret (yes, still!)

What was the last local restaurant you patronized? Po’s Dumpling Bar

Favorite person or thing to follow on Twitter: Kansas City Repertory Theatre, @KCRep

February 23rd

Where do you drink? The kitchen. Anybody’s kitchen.

Person or thing you ﬁnd really irritating at this moment: Brown & Crouppen ads

ARTOPIA April 7th

What’s your favorite charity? Special Olympics and Alzheimer’s

What subscription — print, digital, etc. — do you value most? Consumer Reports

Favorite place to spend a signiﬁcant portion of your paycheck: Trader Joe’s or Thai Place

Last book you read? Q Is for Quarry by Sue Grafton

What local phenomenon do you think is overrated? Science City

Favorite day trip: Weston

TASTE OF KC May 20th MUSIC SHOWCASE August 2nd

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Where do you like to take out-of-town guests? Steamboat Arabia. Then Jack Stack. Or Denver. Finish this sentence: “Kansas City screwed up when it …” Did NOT build a baseball stadium downtown. Finish this sentence: “Other than the Kauffman Center, Kansas City got it right when …” They built the city around beautiful boulevards and fountains. Kansas City needs: Light rail.

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What TV show do you make sure you watch? The Closer

Who or what is your sidekick? Three ﬁngers of 12-year-old Macallan single malt

HER KC SUGAR RUSH

Describe Kansas City in 10 words or less: “Big small town” or “small big town” — it’s just right!

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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What is your most embarrassing dating moment? I’ve been married for 33 years. I haven’t had an embarrassing dating moment for months! Finish this sentence: “People might be surprised to know that …” I’m a “Christmas guy.” Describe a recent triumph: My outdoor Christmas lights — injury-free once again!

Veteran KC actor Gary Neal Johnson plays Scrooge for the 11th time in the Kansas City Repertory Theatre’s A Christmas Carol. The play runs through December 26. M O N T H X X–X X , 2 0 0 X

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This beer-cooler-driving elf has seen naughty Santas and nice (and slippery) strippers.

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Booze Cruisin’ Elf is curly red shoes and ornery personality wow children and impress women at holiday events. And dudes bust out high-ﬁves when he delivers cold ones on his electric beer-cooler scooter — perhaps the last word in hybrid transportation. At 4 feet 7 inches, 55-year-old Jeffrey White is Kansas City’s top elf. From playing an elf in Hallmark ads to working as a leprechaun at local St. Patrick’s Day events to appearing as a gnome on billboards in France, the Olathe man has made a name for himself in the little-person entertainment world. Of all his work, he’s busiest at Christmastime — you name it, he elfs. White recently talked naughty Santas, oily strippers and much more with The Pitch. The Pitch: What’s the craziest thing you have seen at a holiday party? White: I was at that bar in Martini Corner that isn’t there anymore that had a stripper pole [Empire Room], and stuff was getting out of hand. Santa was totally blasted. He was playing the bad Santa at the stripper pole. And then at house parties, when there is a big house and there is a pool and there is a hot tub, you know it’s gonna get crazy. After a while, the clothes come off, and I’m like, “Check, please.” What’s the most ridiculous thing you have done for work? When I worked for 96.5 the Buzz, they had me oil-wrestle this girl. Wait, who was this girl? A stripper. They acted like I ripped her clothes off, but I didn’t. When we wrestled, she won, so they all made fun of me. Where do you draw the line on what you will do for money? I just canceled an appearance on The Jerry Springer Show. They wanted to make it a lovehate triangle — a bitch-slapping type of thing where a girl of normal stature and a little-person girl would get upset over me. I don’t need that. I won’t exploit myself. Dwarf bowling, mini brawlers — I won’t do that crap. I like to do the good, clean, fun work. If you weren’t an entertainer, what would you do? I like to detail cars and would have a business called Little Details. This Santa I used to work with and I used to talk about doing that in the off-season. This Santa and I — we were quite the pair. And then cancer came and took him. It was the saddest thing. But when we were together, we had our act down. It was like a TV show. I’d go out there with my candy

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cane, calling myself Jolly Bean the executive elf, holding a list with the kids’ names divided into naughty and nice. I’d hype up Santa as the main event and have the moms and dads along with the kids jumping up and down and cheering. Man, I really miss my Santa. We heard you were telling people at a party that you have seven kids by seven women. I’ve never said that. I have one beautiful 13-year-old daughter, who is of normal stature and is a model, and one beautiful girlfriend. My girlfriend comes with me a lot while I elf. There are always girls kissing and hugging on me. That is just part of the shtick. What work makes you the most proud? The Missouri Lottery Luckytown commercials I did, way back when, really got me into the elf business. After that, everybody was like, “Who is that elf? We’ve got to get him.” I’m really proud of the gnome shoots I’ve done for photographer Nick Vedros. I’m up on billboards in France with that. And then, after the St. Patrick’s Day parade, when I’m a leprechaun, I’ll go with the clowns and everybody to Children’s Mercy and cheer up the sick kids. Imagine being a kid sick in bed, and a leprechaun shows up and gives you gold coins. It is pretty rewarding to see how happy I can make those kids. What do you want for Christmas? A new Cruzin Cooler 1000 [type of electric cooler scooter]. I’ve really been wearing this one out. They are made perfect for me but are not really made for the amount of usage I do. I use it for gigs and ridin’ around town, going shopping, etc. A black-and-white one would be nice. — NANCY HULL R IGDON

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Find out who’s naughty and nice at pitch.com/plog

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he biggest music story of 2011 was the introduction of Spotify, a music-streaming service that allows users to listen to just about any song they desire, whenever they desire, for the price of muting a 30-second advertisement every half-hour. It’s user-friendly, it’s legal, it’s free, and it’s the latest and most convincing evidence that bands attempting to make money selling their music are screwed. A remarkable corollary is the rise of vinyl sales, which are currently the highest they’ve been since 1991. The mass digitizing of our culture has created, in certain demographics, a premium on tangible objects. Earnest music fans crave more than a cluster of songs to scroll past in their iTunes. They want, and are sometimes willing to pay for, the old-school package: a record crackling on the turntable, full-sized art to hold and look at, decoration for the living room. This vinyl resurgence will not save the music business. But it offers a niche revenue stream in a dried-up industry and an opportunity for loyal fans to show support. An encouraging number of local acts embraced wax as a release platform in 2011, and we’ve spent the last few weeks speaking with some of the musicians and designers who played a role in these projects. Look through and read their thoughts on vinyl and see some dazzling album art. Then go track down these bands and buy some records from them. 6 the pitch 2 THE PITCH

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TITAN R EC OR DS Label co-founder Tom Sorells, on the vinyl reissue of the Titan Records boxed set: “Numero Group is a Chicago label that has this really great track record of documenting forgotten music scenes, and they released a CD box of our stuff in 2009. But I always really wanted to see it reissued on vinyl. And ﬁnally they agreed. So there are four LPs in this big slipcase box, and there’s a 24-page booklet that comes with it that kind of tells the Titan story, which we worked on for probably a year. It’s nice to see it in big print where everyone can sit down and read it.” Sorells, on the cover: “It’s the same cover as our 1980 Titan sampler. It’s kind of a takeoff of the famous RCA logo of the dog in front of the Victrola. I think we even used the same breed of dog as the RCA dog. We brought it to this high-end stereo store — this was back when you had to buy speakers the size of suburbs to get good sounds — and set the dog in front of these expensive state-of-the-art speakers. We had some other ideas for the reissue cover, but Numero Group always felt that the dog with headphones was an iconic image.”

THE E M BAR R A SSM E NT TH E LEOPAR DS Kansas City Slickers (Reissue) Sing Sing Records Kevin Sanders (bass), on the artwork’s inspiration: “Dennis Pash, the leader and primary songwriter of the Leopards, created the artwork. I think it was the title of the album, Kansas City Slickers, that inspired the artwork, rather than the tracks. The cover is from the cover of the original edition of the sheet music for ‘12th Street Rag,’ by Euday Bowman. The back cover of the album is also from a piece of ragtime sheet music, ‘Peaceful Henry,’ written by E. Harry Kelly and published by Carl Hoffman Music in Kansas City in 1901. Dennis and I are big fans of ragtime music, and you can hear a strong ragtime inﬂuence in the Leopards’ music.” Sanders, on how a 30-year-old album, of which fewer than 1,000 copies ever existed, came to be reissued by a label in New York: “Sing Sing approached us about reissuing the album on vinyl. They said that there is a market for this kind of music on vinyl, especially with young people. We’ve seen Kansas City Slickers sell on eBay for as much as $200 to $300, so they may be right.”

“Patio Set” b/w “Sex Drive” (Reissue) Last Laugh Records Bill Goffrier (vocals and guitar): “We didn’t have a lot of experience at the time when we were doing it. I sort of recall sitting around and sketching it out at a rehearsal we had. I think we sort of sat around some table and sketched out what we thought would be a good cover idea and practiced some calligraphy and talked about some photographs. John Nichols, the singer, did the calligraphic lettering, as I recall. We used parts of some photographs, just to be a little bit more mysterious about what was actually being depicted. At ﬁrst, we kind of wanted a picture of the band, but then we decided that, no, we didn’t even want a picture of us to be on there. It ended up being very loose, and it always kind of amazed me that the front cover was so lopsided. Why couldn’t we have leaned the photograph, have it cut square, or have actual vertical and horizontal edges, instead of kind of like crooked? But crooked it was, and there’s mistakes on the back, and I guess we thought that was kind of punk at the time. “Last Laugh contacted us about a year before [the release]. I didn’t really know anything about them, but they asked about doing it, and … we happened to have the mixed-down master. It was just sitting and rotting anyway. “One of the problems with our [original] pressing is that it was a little off-center, but as you got to the end of both songs, there was always kind of this wow and ﬂutter that people thought was some kind of studio effect, maybe. But it was the fact that the record was off-center and never quite sounded the way it was supposed to. So this one might actually sound better.” continued on page 8

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On the Record continued from page 7

A D A STR A A R K E STR A

DAR K AGE S Can America Survive? Sorry State Records Was the cover influenced by the songs, or did you have an idea in mind beforehand? Justin Betterton (lead guitar): “The cover artwork for the Can America Survive? LP is more thematically related to the songs than literally. A cold image of four tensed chains is what kept coming to mind. The eye has a tendency to want to break things down into thirds. Using four rows of chains is in direct opposition to this. It feels wrong. It makes the viewer hold on to the image longer than he may want to. We all wanted the record to look timeless. We wanted it to look like it could have been released at any time during the existence of punk music. Most of those classic records either have the lyrics or an essay about the band on the back cover. We went with putting lyrics back there. It fits perfectly with the up-front, to-the-point theme.” Why vinyl? Jordan Carr (vocals): “When a record comes out on vinyl, it becomes a piece of visual — not just audible — art. Holding an LP is a very tactile experience. It feels more real, more legit. From a band standpoint, putting something out on vinyl is much more of an accomplishment. It takes a lot more effort. When you see a punk band, local or touring, in a basement or at a DIY venue and they have a 7-inch, you instantly know that they care about what they’re doing. They care enough to find a pressing plant, make test presses, figure out how to make covers, inserts, etc. Putting a punk record out on vinyl makes you feel like part of a bigger thing. It makes you feel like you really, actually do have a lot in common with the bands you love. The greatest punk bands were just collections of weird kids who got together and put out a record. It’s cool to think that you and three of your similarly odd friends can write some songs and press a record, and that you’d be following the same path as the Minutemen. “I’ve always just liked holding a record in my hands, reading the inserts, seeing the art printed and in a larger size than you get with a CD or art that comes with MP3s. But more than anything, vinyl is just the best way to listen to punk. Records just have a more powerful and real sound than any digital format. Besides, who listens to CDs anyway?”

Reverse Fishing The Record Machine Why the big heads in the art? Brooke Tuley (multi-instrumentalist and layout): “Big heads beckon you to stare at them. And paint accentuates the deep down — the confusion, confidence, joy and sorrow of it all. Beauty and Tragedy. Destruction and Hope. Wild and Alone. Quiet and Together. They had to sit still for hours.” How was the face paint done? Danielle Parelman (artist): “The face paint was Mike Tuley’s idea. He had seen some prints that I’d had in a show recently that had a heavy use of pattern and texture, so he proposed the idea of me painting Megan [Williams] and Jimmy [Fitzner]’s faces and then having them photographed as the cover for the record. I did paint directly on their faces with water-based paints, and big props to them for being extremely patient, as it took about three hours to do each one. I just had them lie down on a table, and I stood over them to work. Our friends Libby Zanders and Anna St. Louis then arranged lighting and photographed their faces. “I wasn’t playing off the tribal elements of the band specifically. Mike gave me a CD of the album and prompted me to work based off what the record sounded like to me. So I just kind of went from there. I’ve been friends with members of the Arkestra for many years, so in a way I already had a sense of what they were going for with this project. The band definitely does incorporate a tribal sound into this album as a whole, but they also have an overall psychedelic feel, and I think that’s probably more of the direction I took when I was working on this project.”

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C V LTS/UM B E R TO Split 7-inch Collective Crowd Records How did you come to provide the artwork for this split? Christian Oldham (artist): “I was friends with Gaurav [Bashyakarla, CVLTS] for quite a bit beforehand but wasn’t familiar with their music. I was familiar with Umberto, having heard their 12-inch on Not Not Fun, Prophecy of the Black Widow. Gaurav sent the songs for the split on CD-R, but it was pretty easy, as he wanted an image I had already done. It was part of another piece — actually, if you look, it’s the background image on Twitter. Gaurav was like, ‘I really like this part of the image. Could I have this as the cover, but darker?’ ” What’s the advantage of releasing something on vinyl, as opposed to CDs or MP3? Matt Hill (Umberto): “The advantage of releasing something on vinyl is that records are larger than CDs and cost more, so they make a bigger impact on the buyer’s life, and if the record sucks, they can resell it. Also, it’s fun to watch them spin around!”

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LAZY Lazy EP The Record Machine So was it you who designed the cover? Brock Potucek (vocals and guitar): “No, it was actually Sarica Douglas [vocals, guitar]. We went through, like, four different designs. We never actually got all the records from the record label. I don’t think they ever actually followed through and gave all of them to us. They were supposed to do 300, but we only got 25. So with that set, we made a really fast preliminary, really fast cover, just for the 25 that we got. Then when we got the rest of 275, we were going to redesign it and have, like, a back sleeve and an insert and all this stuff. So the cover of that, everyone knows, is actually just a predecessor, or for something that never came to be, which is a weird side note, but yeah, Sarica designed it. It’s based off a portrait of Drew Barrymore, and it’s kind of akin to Roxy Music album covers.” There’s another 7-inch coming. Does that mean you guys like doing that the best? “Yeah, we do. I think we’ll do one EP release every year, along with, like, two cassettes and live stuff and other compilations. So we’re going to stick to, like, the four-song, six-song EP format. … But ﬁnancially it’s kind of hard for an independent band, unless someone picks us up.” What does the aesthetic of the vinyl record do for the music? “I think, in general, album art is wonderful. It’s one of my favorite aspects of music — album art and kind of looking through stacks of albums. I think it’s just as important, if not more important, than the music itself, because sometimes the album art has struck me more than the music.”

VAR IOUS AR TISTS Cheap Beer Replay Records How did you determine the concept for the cover? Kenneth Kupfer (artist): “Brad [Shanks] told me pretty much exactly what he wanted for the concept: people walking into the Replay and walking out as monsters, and then going to kick it at the Jackpot. When I drew it, I added lots of little details of my own. I think the monster theme is about being seduced by booze and rock and roll. “Depending on what the piece is for, I will either paint it by hand or do a drawing, and then trace out all the different color layers with a brush pen. Then I just scan that shit into Photoshop and colorize it and put it together. I approach it sort of like screen-printing.”

MINDE N Swift Way On 7-Inch The Record Machine How did you get into designing albums? Andrew Heubeck (cover designer): “I run a small music label from home. As an armchair design enthusiast without a real budget for art, the logical solution was to design many releases myself. I think my real strength as a ‘designer’ isn’t in the choices I make but rather the ones I avoid. I’m an amateur — really a phony when it comes down to it — and I don’t kid myself about my worth as a designer. I get ideas and I do my best to realize them. The only concern I have is creating the right visual context.”

MOUTH B R E ATH E R S “Anxiety” b/w “The Creeper” In the Red Records Zach Campbell (drums): “Everything sounds better on record. It’s warmer. MP3s are ﬁne in a pinch, but CDs are pretty much useless, in my opinion. I don’t think I’m the only one who can say they are still sitting on top of boxes and boxes of their old band’s CDs.”

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THE PITCH

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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S U N D AY PAGE 12

M O N D AY PAGE 12

T U E S D AY PAGE 13

An art throwdown at RecordBar.

Remembering peace at the National WWI Museum.

Trash Nite at the Bottleneck.

NIGHT + DAY WEEK OF DECEMBER 22–28

T H U R S D AY

12.22

[NIGHTLIFE]

ZACH CAN THROW A LOVELY PARTY

[RECREATION]

DJ P’s mash-up mastery has been the most real highlight of BET’s ongoing DJ contest, Master of the Mix, where the only thing heavier than judge Amber Rose’s makeup has been the sponsorship plugs for Smirnoff Vodka. Thankfully, DJ P is bringing his show — the undeniable turntable skills on actual vinyl, plus his downto-earth good humor — to rattle the subwoofers tonight at Blvd. Nights (2805 Southwest Boulevard, 816-931-6900). The Lovely skateboard crew are on hand to sell their wares, while the EZ Brothers and DJ Clockwerk are open on the 1s and 2s. Cover is $10, beginning at 9:30 p.m. — NADIA PFLAUM

SNOW BLOW

Winter party times can be found a few minutes north of KCI. Take equal parts tubing, skiing, snowboarding and lodge drinking, and mix them with discounts, and you have a celebration at Snow Creek Ski Area (1 Snow Creek Drive, in Weston, 816-640-2200). The ski resort — made possible by snowmaking machines and Missouri River FIND bluffs — has a college MANY MORE night every Thursday from 4 to 9 p.m. Those who show a valid colID receive 50 perLISTINGS lege cent off regular skiing, ONLINE AT snowboarding and tubPITCH.COM ing rates. Slopes or no slopes, you can still enjoy drink specials in the upstairs bar and lounge, the Last Run. If college night isn’t extreme enough for you, head to the resort Friday for the 6 p.m. Santa Shred Holiday Jam snowboarding competition, an event that will keep the resort open until 2 a.m. For more information, see skisnowcreek.com or search Snow Creek Ski Area on Facebook. — NANCY HULL RIGDON

EVENT

[THEATER]

STAGED CHEER

’Tis the season for holiday productions. These shows are guaranteed to remind you that you need an attitude adjustment — or just a break from television. A Christmas Carol (Kansas City Repertory Theatre, 4949 Cherry, 816-235-2700). The KC Rep has jazzed up Charles Dickens’ classic with breakthrough set construction, and eye-catching lighting and projection design. Yes, it’s a local holiday habit, but who better reminds us of our need for hope than Ebenezer Scrooge himself? Kyle Hatley directs, and Gary Neal Johnson, Walter Coppage and Mark Robbins lead a large cast. Tickets cost $25-$80 for shows on Thursday (2 and 7 p.m.), Friday (2 and 8 p.m.), and Saturday and Monday (1 and 5 p.m.). See kcrep.org for more information. Christmas in Song (Quality Hill Playhouse, 303 West 10th Street, 816-421-1700). This annual song showcase is split into two parts: (1) religious and more spiritual songs, and (2) traditional holiday favorites. Molly Hammer,

[FILM]

DON IPOCK

YULETIDE SNEER

A Victorian mortality tale at the Rep (Thursday)

LaTeesha McDonald Jackson and Lindsey McKee perform with J. Kent Barnhart on piano. Tickets cost $29 for shows at 8 p.m. Thursday and Friday, and 3 p.m. Saturday. It continues through December 24. For more information, see qualityhillplayhouse.com. Mother Goose’s Christmas Crimes and Holiday Hi-Jinx Vaudeville Revue (Martin City Melodrama, 9601 Metcalf, in Overland Park, 913-642-7576). This two-part, kid-friendly production, featuring Little Bo Peep, Simple Simon and the Water Glass Symphony, is both murder-mystery operetta and silly seasonal story. This all-in-one show playing at Metcalf South mall is directed by Jeanne Beechwood and features Kattie Post, Andrea Huckaba, Dianne Brown and Marcus Mull. Tickets cost $13.99 for shows Friday and Saturday and $10.99 for shows Monday-Thursday. It runs through January 1, but there’s no performance December 24. See martincitymelodrama.org for show times and more information. For a list of holiday theater productions, see pitch.com. — BERRY ANDERSON

F R I D AY

12.23

[ H O L I DAY ]

HOLIDAY HOGS

Santa isn’t warming up his new ride. The engines you hear roaring inside the FOKL Center (556 Central, in Kansas City, Kansas, 913-207-9549) two nights before Christmas are the sounds of the Lucky Boys, a bunch of bikers who rent the basement of the Strawberry Hill art gallery and rock club. “Motorcycle revving” really is part of the lineup for Festivus. “The motorcycle gang will have their shop opened up,” promises event organizer Martin Swank. The night’s main draw, though, is the indie rock of Mouthbreathers, Muscle Worship, Scammers and I Love You. “It’s anti-Christmas but in a friendly way,” Swank says about his party. “I just wanted to have good bands from Lawrence play — and Scammers.” The all-ages show starts at 8 p.m. The $7 admission fee pays the musicians; anything left over goes toward the campaign to raise $5,000 to develop the venue. You can contribute directly at indiegogo .com/foklcenter. — CRYSTAL K. WIEBE

If the thought of watching It’s a Wonderful Life for the 100th time makes you want to spew eggnog all over your plasma screen, consider an alternative. At 9:30 p.m., Screenland Crossroads (1656 Washington, 816-421-9700) shows you Bad Santa. Billy Bob Thornton stars as a small-time thief and big-time drunk who poses as a department-store Santa in order to rob a mall. Among the film’s many gifts are Tony Cox as Thornton’s filthy-mouthed helper, Lauren Graham as Thornton’s slutty love interest, John Ritter (in his last film role) as the suspicious store owner, and Bernie Mac as the crooked mall cop. But the greatest gift of all is Brett Kelly as “the Kid.” Kelly is a sweet little butterball of a boy — Ralph Wiggum made flesh. Tickets cost $8. — MEGAN METZGER

S AT U R D AY

12.24

[NIGHTLIFE]

MAZEL TOV!

Ironic scenesters have their ugly Christmas sweater parties. Ironic Jewish singles have Bagel Bash. This year, RecordBar (1020 Westport Road, 816-753-5207) is the non-gentile place to be Christmas Eve — but who says the stocking-hanging public can’t join us? Instead of listening for those reindeer hooves on the roof, raise the roof with musical guest 90 Minutes. And get those visions of sugarplums out of your heads — you don’t know what they are, either, admit it — to snack on some kosher goodies and drink continued on page 12

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serious cocktails. Or, you know, keep waiting for Santa. Tickets for Bagel Bash cost $30 at the door, or $20 before noon December 23 by following the RSVP link on jewishkansascity.org. Bagel Bash starts at 8 p.m. — NADIA PFLAUM

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S U N D AY

12.25

[FOOD & DRINK]

OPEN-ON-CHRISTMAS RESTAURANTS

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D E C E M B E R 2 2 - 2 8 , 2 0 1 1 pitch.com M O N T H X X–X X , 2 0 0 X pitch.com

Who the hell spends Christmas Day in a casino? Sounds depressing, right? Actually, some of our most memorable yuletide occasions have gone down at casinos. First, it’s crowded — a lot of people thought no one would be there. Second, everyone seems happy. And third, no children. So give yourself a gift of true indulgence. Whisk yourself away to the adult playground that is a casino and, while there, eat unapologetically. The Buffet at Harrah’s Casino (1 Riverboat Drive, North Kansas City, 816-472-7777) serves an $8.99 breakfast from 7 to 10:30 a.m. and a holiday spread from 11 a.m. to 9:30 p.m. that features smoked pork loin, baked ham, whole roasted turkey and a variety of other salads, side dishes and desserts. The dinner is priced at $23.99 for adults. The Terrace Buffet at the Argosy Casino (777 Northwest Argosy Casino Parkway, Riverside, 816-746-3100) offers a breakfast buffet from 7 to 10:30 a.m. and a traditional Christmas buffet — featuring baked ham, turkey and all those good things — from 11 a.m. to 10 p.m. The buffet costs $24.99 for adults. Horizons Buffet at Ameristar Casino (3200 North Ameristar Drive, 816-414-7000) is one of the best-laden casino buffets, featuring roast turkey, ham-stuffed pork loin, prime rib, cornbread stuffing, mashed potatoes, glazed sweet potatoes and assorted sweets (including a chocolate fountain). Eat brunch from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m., or opt for dinner from 4 to 9 p.m. The price for adults is $22.99. Calypso’s Buffet at the Isle of Capri (1800 East Front Street, 816-855-7777) serves breakfast from 7 to 10 a.m., brunch from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. and dinner from 4 to 10 p.m. Call for prices and details. — BERRY ANDERSON AND CHARLES FERRUZZA [DISCUSSIONS]

A HA’PENNY FOR YOUR THOUGHTS

Not a Christian? Don’t believe in Santa Claus? That’s OK. The Community of Reason KC invites you to get a little caught up in the Christmas spirit anyway. For the second year,

Bet on good food at the casino (Sunday). Kansas City’s Center for Free Thought, an educational organization dedicated to bettering humanity through truth and reason, hosts a discussion of joy and inspiration as a basis for personal action. Freethought and Christmas, a forum open to anyone, begins at 1 p.m. in Room 301 of Haag Hall on the University of Missouri–Kansas City campus (northwest corner of 52nd Street and Rockhill Road). “For me, it just feels like there’s so much beauty in our world, and there’s so much work that needs to be done to see to it that everyone gets to share that,” says Theo Schubert, a longtime member of the group. The free event offers complimentary coffee and parking. For more information about the group, see communityofreasonkc.org or call 816-561-1866. — CRYSTAL K. WIEBE [ART]

THE ROYAL BRUSHOFF

Besides the occasional hip-hop and graffitiartist collaboration, there aren’t many opportunities in this town to see visual art created in front of you. Which makes tonight’s Art Battle kind of a big deal. This seventh installment of the competition features past winner Tyson Schroeder versus rock-star and entrepreneur Steve Tulipana. The contest is at Tulipana’s own RecordBar (1020 Westport Road, 816-753-5207), so the home-court advantage is his. The rules? Each man has two 45-minute sessions to complete a painting that features elements chosen by the host or suggested by the audience. When it’s all over, the paintings are auctioned off, and the winner is the artist who has raised more money. Of course, the real winners are tonight’s charities. Tulipana has chosen the Midwest Music Foundation, while Schroeder is going with the Juvenile Arthritis Foundation. Robert Moore brings the tunes at this no-cover, 9 p.m. throwdown. — NICK SPACEK

M O N D AY

12.26

[FILM]

PEACE BE WITH US

Does the thought of faking nice with your inlaws make you wish holiday family gatherings would disappear? Try to follow the example of some World War I enemies and play nice for just a bit. It was Christmas Eve in 1914. The war had raged for six months and was well on its way to becoming the bloodiest conflict in history. But the carnage and deep divides

Remember the Christmas you gave the gift of

SCUBA DIVING

took a brief pause in the name of Christmas. French, Scottish and German troops called a spontaneous and unofficial Christmas truce along Germany’s Western Front. Relive this story of holiday peace at a showing of Joyeux Noël. The 2005 drama details the true story at 2 p.m. at the National WWI Museum at Liberty Memorial (100 West 26th Street, 816-784-1918). Admission is free, and the film is rated PG-13. See theworldwar.org for more information. — NANCY HULL RIGDON

T U E S D AY

12.27

[NIGHTLIFE]

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Local artist Adam Jeffers (who’s also the frontman for Lawrence performance-artand-music act Superargo) has been curating the local showings of Horror Remix, a monthly video collage of all the best horrormovie moments that Texas artist E.J. Antilla can muster (think blood, guts and boobs). Antilla is taking the holidays off, so Jeffers brings us Trash Nite, his own take on grindhouse agglomeration. Jeffers has delved into his own collection and created a blend that he dubs “kid stuff,” bringing together such lost gems as Hawk Jones (1986), Bad Manners (1984) and 7 Lucky Ninja Kids (1989), delightfully awful films centered on delinquent youth. Best of all, it’s free. It all starts at 9 p.m. at the Bottleneck (737 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785-841-5483). — APRIL FLEMING

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Push, the new art exhibit at the Dolphin gallery (1600 Liberty, 816-842-4415), is ballsy stuff. One of its featured artists is Colorado-based Del Harrow, who took his piece out of the Denver Art Museum and rehung it at the Dolphin the way he wanted it — a massive ceramic tapestry painted the color of the ocean and the sky. David Ford built a 10-foot-plus cinder-block wall under a synthetic moldy trellis in the smaller room of the gallery, and Kansas City Art Institute grad Aaron Wrinkle (now based in Los Angeles) built his 90-inchby-108-inch piece on the spot, three days before the show went up. The gallery is pushing KC’s art and pushing us with it. Anyone buying one of these works just needs a space big enough to put it in. The free show is open Tuesday through Saturday through January 21. See thedolphingallery.com to preview the pieces. — KENT SZLAUDERBACH Night + Day listings are offered as a free service to Pitch readers and are subject to space restrictions. Submissions should be addressed to Night + Day Editor Berry Anderson by e-mail (calendar@pitch.com), fax (816-756-0502) or mail (The Pitch, 1701 Main, Kansas City, MO 64108). Please include zip code with address. Continuing items must be resubmitted monthly. No submissions are taken by telephone. Items must be received two weeks prior to each issue date. Search our complete listings guide online.

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THE PITCH

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MONTH

film Story Bored As a kid, I had a making-of book filled with storyboards that Steven Spielberg used while shooting Raiders of the Lost Ark — proof that the filmmaker carries in his head an uncanny ability to lay out screen space. It’s as if someone said, “truck chase,” and the pursuit immediately unBY folded in Spielberg’s mind, JIM not just in every direction but also in every dimension: RIDLEY ahead, behind, sides, distance, up close, even underneath. Spielberg was working in 3-D before anyone slapped a pair of glasses on him. He perceives space like a cubist. And therein lies almost all the fascination of The Adventures of Tintin, Spielberg’s first movie shot in motion-capture 3-D digital animation. Watching the movie is like viewing a Spielberg storyboard sprung to action, if not life, and you can appreciate the magical deftness of his touch unencumbered by gravity or physical camera placement. (So it’s hard to film a scene with mirrors, eh? Watch the director dust his knuckles on his lapel as his camera glides unseen past a hundred of ’em.) All that’s missing, alas, is the undervalued part of Spielberg that relishes what real, live human beings bring to a movie: flashes of wit, surprise and, above all, personality. The movie is adapted from the Belgian artist Hergé’s comic books about a curlicuecoifed reporter and his wonder dog, Snowy. Their thirst for adventure has them engaging their first globe-trotting mystery before

OUT THIS WEEK The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo Let’s be generous and call Stieg Larsson’s juggernaut Millennium Trilogy — anchored by The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo — a modern fairy tale rather than an endless procedural driven by sphincter-clenching violence and cloudy logic. The story’s vengeful, wraithlike heroine, Lisbeth Salander, seems descended from Grimm stories or Norse legend, part victim and part deceiver, not quite real. Gifted with certain preternatural skills and feral instincts, she has been sent by the gods — or by Random House — to punish evil men. Punish evil men real good, in the ass. All right, all right, that part isn’t so generous. Sorry. But if you’ve seen the Swedish movies or read the books, you know: ow, ow, ow. The Swedish film versions plod along, chilly and workmanlike, so straight-faced about the misogynistic brutality and primal bloodshed within as to be unintentionally 14

the pitch

W E TA D I G I TA L LT D . ( C ) 2 01 1 PA R A M O U N T P I C T U R E S

TINTIN FALLS FLAT FLAT.

the animated credits are dry. A ﬂea-market schooner model plunges the doughboyish hero (voiced by Jamie Bell) into a new intrigue involving a gruff sea captain (Andy Serkis, the digital Zelig) and the captain’s scheming archrival (Daniel Craig). Soon enough, the director is ditching that antiquated old Steadicam for a dizzying instantclassic set piece that careens, teeters and zip-lines around Escher-like streets after a clue-snatching hawk. Look elsewhere for the usual yap about Spielberg as soulless tyro and rank sentimen-

talist. The most indelible parts of his thrillride movies are the inspired character beats (“You’re going to need a bigger boat”), and the supposed cream puff has directed what may be the two most stark considerations of killing on ﬁlm (Adam Goldberg’s memoryscarring kniﬁng in Saving Private Ryan, and the assassins methodically assembling their weapons before one victim in Munich). But Tintin has little of either virtue. It’s essentially a spry video-game interstitial. Spielberg’s visual virtuosity is everywhere in evidence, but the plastic-replica limita-

funny. Which is one reason that moviegoers far and wide popped little box-office boners at the news that David Fincher would direct the English-language version of Tattoo. Fincher, who was so deft with procedural minutiae and bad behavior in Zodiac and The Social Network, seemed the perfect choice for turning this sick shit into glossy, awesome-looking sick shit. Because, you know, who else? Kathryn Bigelow, maybe? Someone not a dude? Working from a screenplay by Steven Zaillian, Fincher has made an undeniably skilled, watchable movie, though it clings tightly to the book’s plot. (You know it already, right? Let’s be generous there, too, and assume yes.) Which means it’s still chilly and workmanlike, even if the craft on display is an order of magnitude better than the original films. And it’s still finally about the men more than it’s about Salander (played here by Rooney Mara as someone perhaps touched

more by Asperger’s syndrome than by dark angels), who must save Mikael Blomkvist (Daniel Craig) from death, professional ruin and snowed-in cock (not in that order). That this fails to fulﬁll her is no surprise, but the late Larsson wasn’t a self-help writer, and there are sequels to think about. If Fincher and Zaillian had pushed harder, they might have found some odd character magic absent from Larsson’s hoary plot. (They might at least have toned down the absurdity of a bad guy with a Bond villain’s secret lair. Who do you call to have an underground kill room installed?) What lingers isn’t Salander, or Mara’s performance. Just the visceral discomfort of having witnessed some really sick shit, expertly ﬁlmed. — SCOTT WILSON

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

pitch.com

War Horse Steven Spielberg says his adaptation of the children’s novel and Tony Award-winning pitch.com

Captain Haddock (Andy Serkis) and Tintin (Jamie Bell) have plenty to do but not much reason to be.

tions of motion-capture snuff the droll humor. Tintin is a dashboard bobblehead. The villain is regrettably generic, and supporting characters who draw knowing chuckles from fans (such as Simon Pegg’s and Nick Frost’s bumbling Tweedle-dum-dums) never quite invite newcomers into their embrace. In some ways, Tintin is arguably Spielberg’s ﬁrst movie in 2-D. ■

play War Horse doesn’t pay conscious homage to the lustrous David Lean clashes and John Ford chiaroscuros that the movie recalls in shot after shot. That’s a pile of manure. War Horse doesn’t recall those and other influences (most spectacularly, the florid sunset vistas of Victor Fleming’s Gone With the Wind) as much as it reconstructs them wholesale (and on film stock rather than digitally). But if this second half of the director’s first-ever December double bill stands on pastiche more than any other film in the Amblin canon, it’s a mode that serves the story. And some of those lush shots exert the power to haunt. For all the praise heaped on Michael Morpurgo’s 1982 book and the puppet wizardry still on Broadway, War Horse’s source material (adapted for Spielberg by Lee Hall and Richard Curtis with only the dimmest flashes of the latter’s contemporary wit) isn’t a natural fit for the screen. The horse M O N T H X X–X X , 2 0 0 X

THE PITCH

A N D R E W C O O P E R , D R E A M W O R K S I I D I S T R I B U T I O N C O . , L LC .

(Joey) is Morpurgo’s narrator, a conceit that works well on the page, refracting violent history into intimately drawn observations on human will and its tragic, far-reaching consequences. Spielberg’s Joey is a real horse and therefore disinclined to speak, even in voice-over. Instead, the movie departs from its parent text to remagnify the theaters of Joey’s journey — endless meadow, struggling farm, polished cavalry, the scorched earth of mechanized trench warfare — showing us what the horse sees. The director uses a leisurely, dialogue-free opening to retrain us: Watch Joey move, feel him react to the light and the sound. The first 45 minutes, an act that runs Emily Watson, David Thewlis, Peter Mullan and newcomer Jeremy Irvine smartly over — and sometimes smack into — the fences of Hollywood prewar melodrama, don’t pass swiftly. But this turns out to be, as is always the case with Spielberg, deliberate, not leaden but smart. By the time Joey is drafted into service at the start of World War I, human frailty has become as vivid to us as the colors in cinematographer Janusz Kaminski’s stunning palette. Detractors will call the film obvious and sentimental, and so it is. It’s also a gorgeous ode to pure cinema unlike anything else Spielberg has made. — SCOTT WILSON We Bought a Zoo Cameron Crowe doesn’t make it easy to dislike his new movie, the warmhearted, cute-kidwielding, music-montaging, animals-areawesome-reminding We Bought a Zoo. Give me a minute, though, and I’ll try. For starters, there’s no scene in which stars Matt Damon and Scarlett Johansson have outdoor sex and are then eaten by lions while Neil Young’s “Cocaine Eyes” plays. This is not for lack of Neil Young, whose “Cinnamon Girl” gets a high-profile moment on the soundtrack. This is Crowe’s, like, 25th movie in a row that times out for music more often than an episode of The Monkees does. (Crowe sustained some sort of head injury sometime in the past decade — a console radio fell on him while tuned to an FM station.) Seriously, Crowe’s habit of keeping whatever lively classic-rock temp track he dreamed up while cutting a movie has gone far enough. What once was a savvy expression of cultural currency, demonstrating a Martin Scorsese-like intuition for the musical rhythms of character and editing, is now 2

THE PITCH

M O N T H X X–X X , 2 0 0 X

Find

mov

at s e m ti p

Albert (Jeremy Irvine) and Joey are of one mind in War Horse.

a deeply exasperating crutch. If that sounds hysterical, it’s only because you haven’t yet endured Tom Petty’s 1985 “Don’t Come Around Here No More” as the cue to feel … well, to feel something as the film’s teenage boy is expelled from school. Crowe has based his movie on Benjamin Mee’s airport-friendly memoir of the same title. It’s the story of a widower and father who finds solace and episodes of Preston Sturgeslike madcappery as the unlikely live-in owner of an animal sanctuary. Damon plays Mee, whose pocket zoo comes with a staff, led by Johansson and including Almost Famous star Patrick Fugit, Elle Fanning and assorted lovable loose screws. As an adventure-addicted reporter in dad jeans, Damon is only a little more believable than he was as talented gay murderer Tom Ripley, but we don’t go to Matt Damon movies for rich characterization. We go because Damon gives off the man-with-a-plan surety of Tom Cruise (before Cruise’s intensity devolved into mania). There’s precious little of that here, though, and Damon is miscast. Mugging children, cute animals, a dead wife — this is prime 1990s Robin Williams material. Crowe courted Damon for the role with the pitch that he’d written the Zoo screenplay with Local Hero in mind. Who would say no to that? Bill Forsyth’s 1983 movie, about an oil-company hatchet man who falls in love with the Scottish town he’s been sent to dismantle, remains the template for any comedy meant to scan as indie, low-key, quirky or inoffensively foreign. Oh, how welcome a Local Hero-like return to form would have been for Crowe, following the fascinating misfire Vanilla Sky and the relentlessly stupid Elizabethtown. But Zoo plays more like one of Disney’s live-action B-movies from the late 1960s — vintage Kurt Russell stuff, like The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes. Are there pleasures here at all? Sure. Remember Jonathan Lipnicki from Crowe’s Jerry Maguire? Maggie Elizabeth Jones outLipnickis the original as the littlest Mee, a scene stealer who belongs in a 1930s tworeeler. And then there’s Thomas Haden Church, giving his dude-bro all to the thankless part of Damon’s brother. He’s second only to Andy Serkis among this year’s movie apes, and he gets two opposable thumbs up. — SCOTT WILSON pitch.com

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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NEW YEAR’S EVE Unless otherwise noted, the following events take place Saturday, December 31. Abe and Jake’s Landing: 8 E. Sixth St., Lawrence, 785-841-5855. Champagne toast at midnight and 700-square-foot balloon drop. Cost is $20 and includes 10 drink tickets and champagne (for those 21 and older only). Doors for the 18-and-older event open at 8 p.m. Aftershock Bar & Grill: 5240 Merriam Dr., Merriam, 913-384-5646. All-ages show with Psychostick, beginning at 6 p.m. Cost is $15. The American Restaurant: 200 E. 25th St., 816-545-8001. Early dinner seatings are at 5:30, 6 and 6:30 p.m. with three-course tasting menu and live music. Cost is $65 per person. Or choose one of two packages that include a dinner reservation and entrance to Union Station for the Rock the Clock celebration. Package One costs $260 per couple and offers three-course dinner, entry to party area and two drink tickets. Package Two costs $310 per couple and offers three-course dinner, entry to party area and unlimited drinks. Second dinner seatings are at 8:30, 9 and 9:30 p.m. with ﬁve-course tasting menu, entertainment by Valery Price and live four-piece band. Party favors and champagne toast at midnight. Cost is $125 per person. Call 816-545-8001 for reservations. Angels Rock Bar: 1323 Walnut, 816-896-3943. Angels Rock Bar is participating in the 2012 KC Live all-inclusive party package, beginning at 9 p.m. Cost is $85 in advance or $95 day of event. Contact Carolyn@AngelsRockBarKC.com or call 816-896-3943 to buy ticket or upgrade to VIP, which includes bottle service and a reserved table (for groups of six, eight, 10 or 12). Aura: 3832 Main. Enjoy DJ Andrew Northern, a balloon drop, more than $2,500 in prizes and a champagne toast. Hosted by Marcus Arnone and Sal Palazzolo. For table reservations or more information, contact info@aurakc.com. The Beaumont Club: 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. The Sex Police, 77 Jefferson and Johnny 2-Tone. Tables available by reservation with champagne toast included. Tickets are available through Ticketmaster. Party begins at 8 p.m. Cost is $24.75 for a table for four or $14 for general admission. The Brick: 1727 McGee, 816-421-1634. Happy hour with Katy G. and Go-Go Ray from 4 to 7 p.m. The Brooksider: 6330 Brookside Plz., 816-363-4070. Entertainment by Dolewite, plus a food buffet, party favors and a champagne toast at midnight for $15 per person in advance or $25 day of event. Event begins at 6 p.m. VIP sections available: Ketel One VIP (inside) costs $1,000 for 10-15 people, and Jägermeister VIP (outside) costs $1,000 for 10-15 people. Call to reserve. Café Trio: 4558 Main, 816-756-3227, cafetriokc.com. See the Plaza lights and enjoy a four-course meal, champagne and live entertainment. Cost is based on seating selection and starts at $49.95 per person. Reservations must be guaranteed with credit card. Seating is available from 5 to 10 p.m. Californos: 4124 Pennsylvania, 816-531-7878. Black Party features DJ Overpour, DJ Magnum and the Patrick Lentz Band. General-admission tickets cost $80 per person or $150 per couple and include entry to all entertainment levels, coat check and open bar all night. VIP tickets cost $110 per person or $210 per couple and include a 10-piece dinner buffet, access to VIP coat checks ($3 per coat), private VIP rooms sponsored by Red Bull and champagne service all night. The Cave at Oread Hotel: 1200 Oread Ave., Lawrence, 785-843-1200, oreadcave.com. Entertainment by DJ Uso. Cost is $40 in advance or $45 at the door and includes 15 drink tickets, party favors, champagne toast at midnight, and coat check. Call 785-830-3942 or e-mail smahoney@oliviacollection.com. Doors open at 8 p.m. Enter on Indiana Street. Charlie Hooper’s: 12 W. 63rd St., 816-361-8841. No cover. Complimentary champagne toast and party favors at midnight. Open until 3 a.m. Crowne Plaza Hotel: 12601 W. 95th St., Lenexa, 913-217-1000. Two packages are offered. Adult package costs $229 per couple (must be 21 to purchase). Includes hotel accommodations for two, welcome

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gift, elegant dinner buffet with cocktails from 6:30 to 8:30 p.m., balloon drop at midnight, breakfast for two (starting at 8 a.m.), and late checkout at 2 p.m. Entertainment by DJ Mike Watts and MC Notorious D.I.C. Family Fun Package costs $129 for two adults and two children. Entertainment includes DJ (9 p.m.midnight), moonwalk, pirate boat, basketball game, caricature artist, balloon artist, indoor pool and breakfast starting at 8 a.m. Dark Horse Tavern: 4112 Pennsylvania, 816-931-3663. Power hours from 8 to MANY MORE 11 p.m., with all-you-candrink wells and PBR, and a free High Life at midnight. Cost is $20. EBT Restaurant: 1310 Carondelet (I-435 and ONLINE AT State Line), 816-942-8870, PITCH.COM ebtrestaurant.com. Prix ﬁxe menu ($36-$62) includes choice of appetizer, soup or salad, and entrée. (Desserts are a la carte). Price of package is based on entrée. Live jazz by Noel Scott and Don Warner. Reservations begin at 5 p.m., ﬁnal seating at 10 p.m. Regular menu not available. Eighth Street Taproom: 801 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785-841-6918. Candlepants and Morri$ perform, 10 p.m. Ernie Biggs Dueling Piano Bar: 4115 Mill, 816-561-2444. All-inclusive drink special costs $75 a person or $140 a couple. Tables by reservation are available. Fat Fish Blue: 7260 N.W. 87th St., 816-759-3474. Dinner at 6 p.m. and show at 9 p.m. featuring D.C. Bellamy costs $39.99 per person. Cost for show only is $10. (Hilton KCI Airport offers Fat Fish Blue guests special rates. Reservations must be made no later than noon Thursday, December 29. Call 1-800-HILTONS.) Fatso’s: 1016 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-865-4055. Annual New Year’s Eve bash features the Kingstonians with Ras Neville, 9 p.m. Cost is $5-$7 and includes champagne and balloon drop. Firefly Lounge: 4118 Pennsylvania, 816-931-3663. An ’80s party costs $10 for guys; women enter for free. A glass of champagne at midnight is included. Foundation: 1221 Union (at Foundation Architectural Reclamation), 816-283-8990. Fashion show at 9:30 p.m. features We Are Tribe and includes special guest and Birdsong fashion brigade. Countdown Show at 11 p.m. features Whoop Dee Doo. A dance party with DJ Sheppa of Nomathmatics, VJ Goonpox and friends begins at midnight. Doors for the 21-and-older event open at 9 p.m. A full night of events costs $25. Tickets for the Countdown Show are $15. Fred P. Ott’s Bar and Grill: 1100 W. Santa Fe, Olathe, 913-390-5955. Party features Brendan MacNaughton at 9 p.m., no cover. Local taxi service for attendees living in the area. Fuel: 7300 W. 119th St., Overland Park, 913-451-0444. A two-venue one-cover celebration at Raoul’s features the Zeros and DJ Xclusive. Cost is $100 per couple for three-course meal, bottle of champagne and reserved table for the night. Reservations are recommended. Gram & Dun: 600 Ward Pkwy., 816-389-2900. Special menu served; see Gram & Dun’s Facebook page for menu information. Choose from three seatings: 5-6 p.m., $50; 7-8 p.m., $60; or 9-10 p.m., $60 or $70 ($70 menu includes champagne toast and party favors). Add a wine pairing to each course for $28. Call for reservations. Gusto Lounge: 504 Westport Rd., 816-974-8786. Bass Party is 21-and-older and features FSTZ, Flashdance Gordon, Brent Tactic and Nmezee, at 10 p.m. Admission is free. Hamburger Mary’s: 101 Southwest Blvd., 816-842-1919. Mary’s Hollywood Starz Red Carpet Party includes drinks, music, videos, and go-go boys and girls. DVJs Synematix play music and videos. Strut in on the red carpet as “paparazzi” snap free photo souvenir. The main dining room will resemble a Hollywood nightclub with custom lighting, top-of-the-line sound, lasers and more. Lounge in the glam bar. Doors open at 7 p.m. for dinner. Enjoy a limited, upscale menu. Party starts at 9 p.m. Harry’s Country Club: 112 E. Missouri Ave., 816-421-3505. Phantoms of the Opry perform, beginning at 9 p.m. Cost is $15 in advance (ticket recommended).

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Allied Saints

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816.753.8665 or uptowntheater.com for more info. pitch.com

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

the pitch

P One of Kansas City’s newer entertainment outfits

The Classic

Party

presents

The Golden Oldies H O L I D AY D A N C E

Thursday, December 29th at The Marriott Hotel 200 W. 12th Street, KCMO 64105 The festivities run from 7 p.m. – 1 a.m. This pre-New Year’s Eve event features some of the most memorable and danceable music of the 50’s, 60’s, 70’s and 80’s. The party includes a super DJ, yummy finger foods, coffee, tea and a cash bar. Door prizes and some delightful surprises round out the evening. For ages 21 up. Admission is $35. Tickets must be purchased in advance at www.kcoldiesdance.com. For group (10 or more) rates, call 816-531-2539.

Come help us KILL-OFF the old year

Fairy! Princess! DIE-aries New Year’s Eve at The Golden Ox The Mystery Train

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Join us this New Year’s Eve for an unforgettable Kansas City celebration @ Union Station Featuring LIVE MUSIC from

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P ADVERTISING SUPPLEMENT Hickok’s Bar & Grill: 528 Walnut, 816-472-0161, hickoksgrill.com. Three-course dinner menu starting at $35 includes wine or drink pairing. Champagne toast and favors are included. Parties of five or more should make reservations. Holiday Inn – Topeka: 605 S.W. Fairlawn Rd., Topeka, 785-272-8040, vacationtopeka.com. Book an allinclusive couples package for the New Year’s Bash 2012. Packages include performance by Charlie and the Stingrays, overnight room accommodations, dinner buffet, late-night breakfast buffet, one drink ticket, champagne toast, and party favors. Howl at the Moon: 1334 Grand, 816-471-4695. Choose from two New Year’s Eve packages. Champagne Supernova package guarantees seats for live dueling piano show at Howl at the Moon, a Garozzo’s catered dinner, premium open bar from 6 p.m. to 1 a.m., party favors, and champagne toast at midnight. Also includes a general-admission pass to participating KC Live venues for snack bar and top-shelf open bar from 9 p.m. to 1 a.m. Cost is $135 per person. Call 816-471-4695 or e-mail Kansascity@howlatthemoon.com. KC Live general-admission package includes standing-room only and half-price drinks at Howl at the Moon from 6 to 9 p.m. and a venue pass to all participating KC Live venues from 9 p.m. to 1 a.m. Cost is $85 per person. Jerry’s Bait Shop: 302 S.W. Main, Lee’s Summit, 816-525-1871. New Year’s Rockin’ Eve with Poison Overdose, 9 p.m. Jerry’s Bait Shop: 13412 Santa Fe Trail Dr., 913-894-9676. New Year’s Rockin’ Eve with music by the Naughty Band, 9 p.m. Kansas City Convention Center: 301 W. 13th St., 816-513-5000. Celebrate Kansas City Convention Center’s fifth annual New Year’s celebration in the Grand Ballroom with an elegant dinner, casino tables, photobooth and caricature artist, and music by Atlantic Express featuring Hal Wakes. Champagne toast and balloon drop at midnight. Package for two costs $299 and includes two tickets to the party with shuttle from the Marriott lobby, two drink tickets, buffet dinner, hotel room, party favors, bottle of champagne at check-in, breakfast for two at Lilly’s, and late checkout at 2 p.m. Single party tickets cost $99. KC Live! Block at the Power & Light District: 14th Street and Grand. The 2012 KC Live! New Year’s Eve Party features an all-inclusive premium open-bar package and a Times Square atmosphere. DJs at four locations. Confetti cannons, laser shows and a ball drop at midnight. Tickets cost $85 in advance or $95 day of event, and include top-shelf open bar (with premium cocktails, import and domestic beers, and wines) from 9 p.m. to 1 a.m., food buffets, party favors, and all-access passes to Angels Rock Bar, PBR Big Sky, Mosaic Lounge, Shark Bar, McFadden’s Sports Saloon, the Living Room, Tengo Sed Cantina, Pizza Bar, Maker’s Mark Bourbon House & Lounge, Howl at the Moon and Johnny’s Tavern. Must be 21. For VIP upgrades or table reservations, e-mail parties@powerandlightdistrict.com. Details and tickets available at NYEKansasCity.com or inside participating venues. Kelly’s Westport Inn: 500 Westport Rd., 816-561-5800. Flannigan’s Right Hook performs from 10 p.m. to 2:30 a.m. Cost is $10 and includes champagne at midnight and party favors. Red Bull bomb specials all night. Kennedy’s Bar and Grill: 500 W. 75th St., 816-361-9788. DJ begins at 9 p.m., with dancing all night, drink special. There’s no cover. Call to make reservations. Knuckleheads Saloon: 2715 Rochester, 816-483-1456. The Rainmakers and the Belairs, party favors, dancing, midnight munchies, and champagne toast. Free shuttle service and hotel deals available. The event, beginning at 8 p.m., is sold out. The Levee: 16 W. 43rd St., 816-561-5565. Music by the Good Foot, $20 in advance or $25 day of event. Call or purchase in person. Doors open at 7 p.m., general admission only. Lew’s Grill and Bar: 7539 Wornall, 816-444-8080. Purchase one ticket and receive entry to both Lew’s and the Well all night. Champagne toast at midnight. DJ CMAC and DJ Kirby perform at the Well. DJ Kilker performs at Lew’s. Tickets cost $10 in advance or $15 at the door. VIP table reservations available at 7:30 p.m. (minimum food and drink purchase). Call the Well at 816-361-1700 or Lew’s at 816-444-8080 for more details, or see waldowell.com. Lucky Brewgrille: 5401 Johnson Dr., Mission, 913-403-8571. Ring in the new year with Lost Wax. Drinks and fun all night, plus a champagne toast at midnight. Maker’s Mark Bourbon House & Lounge: 1333 Walnut, 816-442-8115. Ken Lovern’s OJT featuring Bukeka Shoals from 8 to 11 p.m., and DJ Rob DeGeorge from 11 p.m. to 2 a.m. Order off regular menu or choose NYE special or NYE three-course prix fixe dinner. Wine pairings available. Contact fallon@ makersmarkrestaurant.com or call 816-674-4137 to buy ticket or upgrade to VIP. Contact christina@ makersmarkrestaurant.com or call 816-674-8208 for more information and reservations. Maker’s Mark is participating in the 2012 KC Live all-inclusive party package.

Marquee Lounge: 1400 Main, 816-474-4545. General admission or premium drink packages offered. Enjoy the Dave Stephens Band for late-night swing. Entry time and cover charge dependent on package purchased. Contact Lauren Yeager at lauren@marqueeloungekc.com for more details. Cost is $25-$249. Marriott Hotel: 200 W. 12th St., 816-421-6800. Pre-New Year’s Eve party Thursday, Dec. 29, begins at 7 p.m. and features music from the 1950s, ’60s, ’70s and ’80s. The Golden Oldies Holiday Dance is 21-and-older and includes DJ, finger foods, coffee and tea, cash bar, and door prizes. Sign up at kcoldiesdance.com. Cost is $35. For group (10 minimum) rates, call 816-531-2539. Marriott Hotel: 200 W. 12th St., 816-421-6800. Celebrate Kansas City Convention Center’s fifth annual New Year’s celebration in the Grand Ballroom with an elegant dinner, casino tables, photobooth and music by Atlantic Express featuring Hal Wakes. Special NYE packages for $299. Get tickets to the Ballroom party, a luxurious room, champagne at check-in, breakfast for two, and late checkout. For details and reservations call 816-421-6800 or see kansascitymarriottdowntown.com. McFadden’s Sports Saloon: 1330 Grand, 816-471-1330. Party begins at 9 p.m. Contact teresa@mcfaddenskc .com or call 816-721-0490 to buy ticket or upgrade to VIP. VIP is available for groups and includes bottle service and reserved table. McFadden’s Sports Saloon is participating in the 2012 KC Live all-inclusive party package. Cost is $85 in advance or $95 day of event. Mike Kelly’s Westsider: 1515 Westport Rd., 816-931-9417. Irish New Year features Black Butter Jam (10 p.m.), Brother Bagman (8 p.m.) and Irish Sessions (3 to 6 p.m.), prime rib dinner, champagne toast and party favors. MoJo’s Bar & Grill: 1513 S.W. Hwy. 7, Blue Springs. Enjoy DJ and dancing, 7 p.m. to 1:30 a.m. Tickets include reserved seating (advance purchase by December 28), appetizer buffet, party favors and champagne toast at midnight. Cost is $10 in advance or $15 at the door. Mosaic Lounge: 1331 Walnut, 816-679-0076. Party features a DJ set by D-JR. VIP available for groups of six, eight or 12 and includes bottle service and reserved table. Contact info@mosaicmo.com or call 816-6790076 to buy ticket or upgrade to VIP (NYEKansasCity .com). Mosaic Lounge is participating in the 2012 KC Live all-inclusive party package, beginning at 9 p.m. Cost is $85 in advance or $95 day of event. Nick and Jake’s: 6830 W. 135th St., Overland Park, 913-681-8535. New Year’s Eve dinner package costs $60 and includes four-course dinner, a table for the night, DJ, dancing, and champagne toast at midnight. Call to make a reservation. Brunch New Year’s Day is 11 a.m.-2 p.m. Traditional holiday favorites include black-eyed peas, collard greens, red-eye gravy and cornbread. Large-party reservations are available. Nick and Jake’s: 6325 Lewis, Suite 110, Parkville, 816-584-8535. New Year’s Eve celebration includes dinner specials, DJ, dancing and a champagne toast at midnight. Brunch New Year’s Day is 11 a.m.-2 p.m. Traditional holiday favorites include black-eyed peas, collard greens, red-eye gravy and cornbread. Largeparty reservations are available. Pachamama’s: 800 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785-841-0990. A special prix fixe menu costs $75 per person and includes a glass of champagne. Price jumps to $100 with wine pairings. See pachamamas.com/blog for more details. PBR Big Sky Bar: 111 E. 13th St., 816-876-5645. VIP available for groups of six, eight or 12 and includes bottle service and reserved table. Contact info@ pbrbigskykc.com or call 816-876-5645 to buy ticket or upgrade to VIP. PBR Big Sky is participating in the 2012 KC Live all-inclusive party package. Cost is $85 in advance or $95 day of event, beginning at 9 p.m. Piropos Restaurant: 4141 N. Mulberry Dr., 816-741-3600. New Year’s Eve menu includes four courses for $75 (appetizer, soup or salad, entrée and dessert) or five courses for $85 (appetizer, soup, salad, entrée and dessert). Wine pairing available with each course: Four-course wine pairing adds $25, and five-course wine pairing adds $30. Dinner-menu selections also are available. Pizza Bar: 1320 Grand, 816-221-8466. VIP available for groups and includes bottle service and reserved table. Contact luke@pizzabarkc.com or call 816-799-2362 to buy ticket or upgrade to VIP. Pizza Bar is participating in the 2012 KC Live all-inclusive party package. Cost is $85 in advance or $95 day of event, beginning at 9 p.m. R Bar & Restaurant: 1617 Genessee, 816-471-1777. New small plates, menu, chef, and vintage cocktails all night. Ramada Convention Center – Downtown Topeka: 420 S.E. Sixth Ave., Topeka, 785-234-5400. Packages include four rooms of entertainment and access to six live bands, overnight room accommodations, dinner buffet, late-night breakfast, brunch the following day, champagne toast and party favors. A discounted room rate of $69 for New Year’s Eve guests Friday, December 30. Call 785-234-5400 to book a package or see vacationtopeka.com for more information.

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

the pitch

P ADVERTISING SUPPLEMENT Raoul’s Velvet Room: 7222 W. 119th St., Overland Park, 913-469-0466. Celebrate the bar’s last night of entertaining Kansas City. Join DJ Xclusive and the Zeros next door (Fuel) for one cover. RecordBar: 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207. Minden, Capybara and Ghosty play, beginning at 9 p.m. Cost of $10 includes party favors and champagne toast at midnight. Rhythm and Booze: 423 Southwest Blvd., 816-221-2669. Doors open at 9 p.m., and cover is $5. Power hours from 9 p.m. to midnight cost $15 and include champagne at midnight and party favors. No tickets or reservations are required. The Riot Room: 4048 Broadway, 816-442-8179. New Year’s Eve of Destruction 2012 features Hammerlord, Mansion, Humans and Walking Oceans, with Cinemaphonic DJ/VJs Stevie Cruz and Cyan Meek. Also, special guest hosts and performances between bands and after the show. The $25 bar bust includes all-you-can-drink wells and Schlaﬂy wheat beer from 7 to 11 p.m. Bar bust includes a commemorative glass. Cost is $5 without bar bust. Free champagne toast for all attendees. RJ’s Bob-Be-Que Shack: 5835 Lamar, Mission, 913-262-7300. Two seatings for smoked prime rib dinners: First seating is 6:30-8 p.m., and second seating is 8:30-11 p.m. Live music includes bluegrass with Rob Ritter, 7-8:30 p.m., and blues with Jason Vivone, 9-11 p.m. Reservations not required but recommended. Call or e-mail rjscatering@ rjsbbq.com. Shark Bar: 1340 Grand, 816-442-8140. Shark Bar goes retro, Studio 54-style. VIP available for groups of four to 20 and includes bottle service and reserved table. Contact kyle@sharkbarkc.com or call 816-679-3892 to buy ticket or upgrade to VIP. Shark Bar is participating in the 2012 KC Live all-inclusive party package, beginning at 9 p.m. Cost is $85 in advance or $95 day of event. Sharks Restaurant & Billiards: 10320 Shawnee Mission Pkwy., Shawnee, 913-268-4006. Event features DJ Lolly at 9 p.m., no cover, and includes free champagne toast at midnight, $5 featured martinis, $15 buckets of any bottled beer, $4 Ursus bombs, $1 Jell-O shots, and $9.99 10-oz. KC strip dinners. Snow & Co.: 1815 Wyandotte, 816-214-8921. ThePhantom* is DJ. All-inclusive drinks and food cost $99 per person and includes table and bar service, and a champagne toast at midnight. Space is limited to ensure VIP service to guests. Social Bar: 1118 McGee, 816-472-4900. Recovery New Year’s Day features DJ Chad Johnson, DJ Trevor Shaw, DJ Mike Dileo. 1-7 p.m. Tasso’s: 8411 Wornall, 816-363-4776. Two packages offered: Package one includes assorted appetizers, beef or chicken kabob, dinner, Greek dessert, and a bottle of champagne for $64.95 per person. (Note: one bottle of champagne per two people.) Package two includes all of package one, plus open bar, beer, house wines and mixed drinks for $120 per person. Tengo Sed Cantina: 1323 Walnut, 816-686-7842. Eyes Wide Shut Masquerade Ball. VIP available for groups of six, eight or 12 and includes bottle service and reserved table. Contact lauren@tengosedcantina.com or call 816-686-7842 to buy ticket or upgrade to VIP. Tengo Sed Cantina is participating in the 2012 KC Live all-inclusive party package, beginning at 9 p.m. Cost is $85 in advance or $95 day of event. Uptown Theater: 3700 Broadway, 816-753-8665. Choose one of two New Year’s Eve party packages. VIP tickets ($80) include six rooms of entertainment. Performances by the Allied Saints and DJs. Premium bar open from 7 p.m. to 1 a.m. in all rooms and a dinner buffet in the Broadway Room from 7 to 9 p.m. Champagne at midnight in the Broadway Room and free coat check. “Not So” VIP tickets ($40) include six rooms of activities and entertainment (same performances and rooms except the VIP Broadway Room), snacks in all rooms and coat check. Rooms open at 7 p.m. and include an open well bar until 1 a.m. Hotel package information available at uptowntheater.com. Urban Table: 8232 Mission, Prairie Village, 913-948-6900. Special New Year’s Eve menu by reservation; see menu on Urban Table’s Facebook page. Choose from three seatings: 5-6 p.m., $45; 7-8 p.m., $55; 9 p.m.-1 a.m., $55 or $65 ($65 includes champagne toast and party favors). Add a wine pairing for $20. VooDoo Lounge: Harrah’s Casino, 1 Riverboat Dr., North Kansas City, 816-472-7777. Quixotic 2012 New Year’s Eve features Mini Kiss at 9 p.m. and costs $35. The Well: 7421 Broadway, 816-361-1700. Purchase one ticket and receive entry to Lew’s and the Well all night. Champagne toast at midnight. DJ CMAC and DJ Kirby perform at the Well. DJ Kilker performs at Lew’s. Tickets cost $10 in advance or $15 at the door. VIP table reservations available at 7:30 p.m. (minimum food and drink purchase). Call the Well at 816-361-1700, Lew’s at 816-444-8080 for more details, or see waldowell.com. Wil Jenny’s: 6700 W. 135th St., Overland Park, 913-897-1114. Music by Garry Lincoln, beginning at 8 p.m. Admission is free.

the pitch

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

pitch.com

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

the pitch

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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café Sí, Salt ZÓCALO IS SPANISH FOR STRONG POTENTIAL AND HIGH SODIUM. Zócalo Mexican Cuisine & Tequileria 620 West 48th Street, 816-756-5555. Hours: Lunch served 11 a.m.–4 p.m. Monday–Friday and 2–4 p.m. Saturday–Sunday; dinner served 5–11 p.m. Monday–Saturday and 4–10 p.m. Sunday; brunch served 10 a.m.–2 p.m. Saturday–Sunday. Price: $$–$$$

L AU R E N P H I L L I P S

arlier this year, I devoted this space to an imaginary Country Club Plaza, one populated with only local restaurants — no chains. I still think it’s a good idea, so it would be a little disingenuous of me to kick the locally owned Mexican restaurant Zócalo, which opened on the Plaza BY this fall. CHARLES The city’s historic shopping and entertainment district F E R R U Z Z A has a checkered past when it comes to Mexican dining. What might cause people to utter that nonAmong such recent Plaza destinations was the charmless Mi Cocina, where the atmosphere committal two-letter assessment is that Zócalo’s was glossy and the food glossier. Further back owners put a lot of effort into creating pre-openin time was Annie’s Santa Fe, the 1980s fixture ing hype without warning local Tex-Mex addicts that most people wistfully recall as having served what they were in for. The place was announced good food. It was actually pretty second-rate, but as a collaboration between Ridler, who is known nostalgia is a potent thing, and a Plaza without for his successful saloons, and the owners of any Mexican food is a Plaza that people love less. Frida’s Contemporary Mexican Cuisine, in OverI like Zócalo a lot more than I thought I land Park. Frida’s serves beautiful, imaginative, would. What the place has, in abundance, is po- delicious Mexican food — no grease, no glop. tential. The owners, including Chris Ridler of Sol The idea was to bring that approach to the Plaza. That partnership fell apart almost as quickly Cantina on 31st Street (speaking of second-rate food), opened their new place less than three as it was announced. “The two groups had difmonths ago, so there’s time for it to live up to its ferent visions,” one Zócalo server explained to me. I don’t know what the promise. They’d better step it “vision” was before the two up fast, though. Plaza diners Zócalo Mexican Cuisine factions split up, but the remake up their minds quickly. & Tequileria sult has proved to be a vast Its problems don’t include Huevos rancheros improvement over the Plaza’s location, unless you believe in con carne ................... $12 last tenant serving south-ofcurses. The corner it occupies Guacamole ......................$6 the-border dishes, the Mexiis a high-traffic spot, but its Chile relleno ................. $13 can mess known as Baja 600. last tenant was the failed Mi Chorizo meatloaf ......... $15 Chicken tinga tacos .... $13 If owners Ridler and Cocina. The building is now Anthony Durone envisioned a lighter and warmer, thanks to stylish but accessible hipster a bank of glass doors opening onto a new patio. The interior remains sleek, hangout (like nearby Coal Vines) that could also but the colors now are comforting earth tones. appeal to tourists who flock to America’s oldThe soundtrack — a friend calls it “modern elec- est shopping center, they’ve pulled it off. Chef tronic” — is upbeat but not annoyingly loud. The Nathan Nely’s menu is mostly well-executed servers are young, attractive and smart. So how and pretty tasty, and it is devoid of cheesy TexMex. The waitstaff wastes no time explaining to can this place go wrong? I’ve heard a lot of people — those folks who patrons that the restaurant doesn’t offer burritos, dash to new restaurants the minute they open so refried beans or chimichangas. And the servers they can “review” the eateries for their friends — told me that people, having perhaps awakened talking about Zócalo since it opened at the end from comas brought on by a long night at Anof September. Most of the early crowd has said nie’s, do come in asking for these items. But is the food at Zócalo enticing enough the same thing: It’s a pretty restaurant, and the bar makes fabulous cocktails. The food, I keep to lure diners back for repeat visits? There, so far, is the rub. hearing, is “OK.” Ridler and Durone might earn time and OK? What the hell does that mean?

The chorizo meatloaf is more than OK.

loyalty thanks to that de rigueur window of opportunity: brunch. And Zócalo’s breakfast burrito, with a filling that includes braised short ribs, eggs and caramelized sweet potatoes, seems tailored to the Brush Creek set. On the Saturday morning I stopped in with a friend, I was so torn between that and the chorizo gravy with biscuits that I panicked and ordered something else entirely: huevos rancheros with slices of tender skirt steak and outrageously good fried Yukon Gold potatoes. “They’re not fried,” our server corrected me. “They’re sautéed in olive oil and baked off in our oven.” My friend Bob surprised me by not ordering a brunch dish — I mean, the price includes a cocktail, so what was he thinking? — and going for a bowl of guacamole for breakfast instead. That’s a fine idea, but this concoction was, sadly, not extraordinary. He followed up with the tortilla soup, which was the disappointment du jour: a thick, almost pasty tomato-based concoction, served lukewarm. The menu promised roasted chicken, grilled sweet corn and lime juice. There was plenty of tender chicken, but the corn wasn’t grilled, and it needed a lot more lime. The mood at our table improved when dessert arrived. The puffy little flourless chocolate cake, smothered in a blanket of gooey caramelized banana slices, was a nice consolation. For my second visit, I took Zócalo a table full of challenges: one epicure, one picky eater, one Tex-Mex fan (he likes In-a-Tub tacos — need I say more?), and a former bartender. The exmixologist immediately ordered a blood-orange frozen margarita and proclaimed it to be a little heavy on the pomegranate liqueur. We needed cool beverages for that meal because we ordered the salsa trio as a starter

— chips and salsa aren’t free here — and the tortilla chips were so salty, we could barely tell the fiery tomatilla salsa from the milder, slightly sweet roasted-tomato-and-mango version. This kitchen uses heavy kosher salt, and the salt so dominated that entire experience, I couldn’t begin to tell you what the third salsa, a smokedmorita-pepper creation, actually tasted like. To me, it was saline. Things improved when the entrées arrived. I can finally say I’ve eaten a slab of chorizo meatloaf that I enjoyed. Nely drapes the well-done loaf slice with a poblano cream sauce that’s the exact shade of a 1974 Amana refrigerator. The dish also includes fresh sautéed spinach. But the spinach, like those chips, was distressingly salty. The picky eater at the table liked the chicken tinga tacos. But who wouldn’t like spicy shredded chicken with glazed pineapple, grilled onion and spinach? His definitive opinion? “They were OK.” (They were better than just OK.) The epicurean found his empañada a little … beige. The crust enfolding the pork, spinach and carrots was pleasingly flaky, but it needed a little punch, a kick not provided by the pretty but tasteless poblano cream sauce. There are two ways here to order the hongos sandwich, with herb-roasted mushrooms, goat cheese, roasted corn and fresh arugula: (1) folded into a taco or (2) as a torta tucked into a soft bun. The Tex-Mex fan surprised me by ordering this vegetarian sandwich and loving it. The ex-barkeep bases her opinion of any Mexican restaurant on the quality of its chile relleno. I don’t use that particular bellwether myself, but I was intrigued to see whether Zócalo would pass muster. From a purely visual standpoint, like most of the pretty dishes served here, the stuffed, battered and fried poblano scored high. The tempura crust was light and feathery, the heat of the pepper tempered by a filling of sweet corn and cow’s-milk Chihuahua cheese. I liked the dish a lot, but the former drink slinger had hoped for grease and glop and was dismayed by their lack. The world may not be filled with fans of greasy, gloppy Tex-Mex, but Kansas City certainly is. So Zócalo’s challenge is substantial: It must convince lovers of combination platters, nachos and taco salads to expand their culinary horizons. Any Mexican restaurant can offer tacos and enchiladas. Zócalo serves braisedshort-rib tacos, seafood enchiladas stuffed with lump crabmeat and poached shrimp, and an enchilada made with (the menu warns) “terrorized carrots.” (Maybe all that salt scares them.) The Spanish word zócalo translates as “town square” or “meeting place.” It’s a nod to the Plaza. I hope Zócalo works enough toward its potential for people to make it a regular meeting place. I, for one, am OK with going back. Have a suggestion for a restaurant The Pitch should review? E-mail charles.ferruzza@pitch.com

pitch.com 2-28 pitch.comD E CMEOMNBTEHR X2X–X X,, 2200101X tThHeE pPi ItTcChH 23 1

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hefs will become more famous, the noodle house will reign supreme, and the wheels will come off the food-truck craze. Fat City is taking a step back from reporting on the latest openings and from hanging with area chefs to predict what will happen in 2012. Here are 10 things we’re confident are on the way in — or out — for Kansas City diners. 1. We’ll go from Groupon to Youpon. Online deals are here to stay, but they’re about to get more personal. Diners get to know local chefs through Twitter and Facebook, and those same means of social media are going to become the most prominent deal sources. Chef Celina Tio has long BY posted notice of last-minute J O N AT H A N table openings on Twitter, and young chefs are too plugged BENDER in to their smartphones not to follow her lead. Alongside all the Groupon-like offers that clutter inboxes today will be more personalized marketing efforts from the restaurateurs. 2. The food-truck herd will thin. It’s going to be a harsh winter for some food-truck proprietors in Kansas City. Like, first-winter-ofPilgrims-in-Plymouth harsh. The mobilekitchen business is seasonal, and winter around here is an unforgiving time. Food trucks, similar to brick-and-mortar restaurants, can be cashintensive ventures, and the next few months are more likely to be in the red than the black. The novelty of a food cart is still there, but the shine might be fading for some diners — even Aramark has a Melt Mobile. Eking out a living at $6 a sandwich or $3 a taco is hard. 3. You will eat a vegetarian dish and forget you love meat. A decade ago, when my brother-in-law’s vegetarian girlfriend was in town, she was eating steamed vegetables and limp pasta. Today, she has a choice of three vegan restaurants and one vegan delivery service, Conveniently Natural. Chefs like Brian Aaron, of Tannin Wine Bar and Kitchen, have begun to view requests to transform meat-laden dishes into veggie-forward fare as welcome culinary challenges. Wine-pairing meals have started to include vegetarian lineups, and in the summer, you can’t throw a fork without hitting an heirloom-tomato dinner. Whether it’s morel season or next summer, you’ll find yourself singing the praises of cashew ice cream at Füd or the fried green tomatoes at Succotash. 4. Kansas will keep getting sister restaurants from KCMO. Kansas can’t stop poaching pizza places from Missouri. Pizza 51 opened in

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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Fairway not long ago, and PizzaBella plans to open a satellite by next summer in the underconstruction space across from Mission Farms. It’s not going to stop there. Native 34, the new concept in the works from Bluestem’s Colby and Megan Garrelts, will likely end up on the other side of State Line Road, and the street-taco craze hasn’t yet hit Leawood. A few shops are looking at making the move the other way — Natasha’s Mulberry & Mott might just set up a permanent home on the Plaza after its holiday shop closes — but the move west will always be alluring. Restaurateurs don’t want to cannibalize their own business in Kansas City, but they recognize that Johnson County diners aren’t always willing to drive into the 816. 5. More pop-ups are on the way. We’re a culture built on exclusives — it’s what we crave. Chef Alex Pope and Jenny Vergara teamed up twice for Vagabond, a weeklong restaurant with only two seatings a night. The Traveling Cocktail Club, a series of guest bartending stops that started during Manifesto’s hiatus, should start again next spring. The Farm to Table Kitchen, ostensibly a restaurant incubator in the City Market, also makes it possible for those without a commissary to launch a food business. Set your GPS for lunch. 6. Hide your husbands — more celebrity chefs are coming to town. The Food Network’s Aaron Sanchez opened Mestizo in Park Place last month, planting the ﬂag for television chefs. With Kansas City’s rising national culinary proﬁle, we suddenly seem like a city ripe for celebrity-chef takeover. We don’t have baggage like San Francisco — a notoriously hard city for an outside chef to crack — but we do have a bounty of local produce and meat at a time when the farm-to-table movement is still on the ascent. Congratulations, Stretch — this is the year that Guy Fieri takes your friendship to the next level. 7. Kansas City will get another beer garden. We are a city of drinkers. But for a long while, outdoor drinking meant the Arrowhead Stadium

parking lot or our own porch. Beer gardens have been popping up around town the past several years, courtesy of the Westside Local and the 75th Street Brewery’s Alley. Come spring, you can expect another outdoor watering hole with picnic tables and hipsters ready to tweet about it. 8. Coffee nerds are the new beer geeks. Beer devotees are well-entrenched by now, but we’re just starting to scratch the surface of local coffee nerdiness. The Caffeine Crawl — a bus tour of a dozen local coffee shops in a single afternoon — sold out this fall, and the opening of micro-roaster Oddly Correct offers further proof that java junkies are eager to learn more about the almighty cup of joe. Whether it’s the gleaming Parisi Café in Union Station or the beans introduced by the Roasterie specifically for iced coffee, coffee is set to enjoy unprecedented cachet. 9. The deli makes a comeback. The New York Delicatessen and Pickerman’s are just two of the names in a long line of shuttered delis. But hope is on the horizon in Columbus Park, where three sandwich sanctuaries thrive within a fiveblock radius (La Sala, Pandolfi’s Deli and Happy Gillis). Meanwhile, a trio of talented chefs (Alex Pope, Michael Beard, Howard Hanna) are serious about butchering, showing a passion with all the makings of a renaissance. 10. The noodle-bar trend finally arrives in Kansas City. The Westport Street Fare, a food truck operated by Richard Wiles and Aaron Confessori that opened last month, serves a ramen special. Pho Hoa on Independence Avenue is continuing the slowly growing roster of places in the metro where Vietnamese soup is served. And Lulu’s Thai Noodle Shop has been a staple of the Crossroads District since it opened more than 14 years ago. But we’re due for a true Japanese noodle bar. If bubble tea can work here, Kansas City is poised for a menu of nothing but rice and noodle dishes. The future at pitch.com/fatcity pitch.com

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music

Music Forecast 29 Concerts 30 Nightlife

Best in Show A LOOK BACK AT 2011’S MOST MEMORABLE CONCERTS.

e had it good here in 2011. Highproﬁle and acclaimed national acts passed through Kansas City and Lawrence. Rare was the week that lacked a compelling reason to make it out to a venue. Below, we list our 10 favorite performances of the year. (These are all out-of-town groups; drop by next week for a survey of some of 2011’s ﬁnest local shows.) We invite you to read, reminisce, debate, insult, threaten — whatever you like!

Phosphorescent Jackpot Music Hall, April 11 Phosphorescent came through Kansas City back in early 2010, on a tour with David Gray. But frontman Matthew Houck and his backing musicians were dwarfed by the gingerbread-castle expanses of the Uptown Theater. The “Babylon” crowd was uninterested. The Jackpot proved a far better setting for Phosphorescent’s wistful, twangy folk-rock. Though not an emotive performer, Houck seemed loose under the low, red-tinged ceilings of the Lawrence venue. He performed a fabulous cover of Willie Nelson’s “It’s Not Supposed to Be That Way”; a heavy version of “Mermaid Parade,” replete with yearning guitar solos; and, to close the show, the gorgeous, haunting “Wolves.” I felt lucky to be there. — A PRIL FLEMING

Wanda Jackson The Granada, May 18 A lot of shows in Lawrence are see-and-be26

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seen affairs. When Wanda Jackson appeared at the Granada, nobody’s eyes left the stage. Jackson gave a performance that belied the rockabilly queen’s 74 years. Her voice sounded as strong as when she was recording classics, like “Let’s Have a Party,” more than 50 years ago. And she demonstrated a naughty streak, talking shit on college students (chiding them for not attending to their ﬁnals) and licking her ﬁnger after a surprisingly sultry take on Amy Winehouse’s “I’m No Good.” Here’s hoping that Jackson’s “second act,” as she referred to her current making-of-the-rounds, awards her long-owed success and recognition. — NICK SPACEK

Fleet Foxes The Uptown Theater, July 18 Helplessness Blues, the second album from Fleet Foxes that arrived earlier this year, is a dark, moody, dreamy folk album whose charms become apparent after only a handful of spins. The band members are drab-looking and generally dress like Communists. (At the Uptown, one of the guys was even wearing one of those green Castro hats.) They specialize in intricate vocal harmonies. Who’s ready to party? Apparently everybody. A sold-out crowd endured the demoralizing July heat inside the Uptown to watch six guys bang on acoustic instruments. It was, in some ways, the social event of the summer. Lots of weed, lots of attractive people wearing

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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their earthiest clothes, even some wholly inappropriate glow sticks. And at the center of it all, a band asserting itself as one of the ﬁnest folk acts in the world. — DAVID HUDNALL

Sade Sprint Center, July 26 One of many revelations brought about by Sade’s breathtaking performance at the Sprint Center in July: It’s possible to do a big-time, high-budget arena show without being overly glitzy, opulent or pandering. But probably only if Sade Adu is involved. She changed clothes four times, each outfit more elegant than the last. The band arrived onstage via elevator risers sprouting through trap doors. Multimedia elements were incorporated into nearly every song. None of it felt hollow or vain. We all fell blissfully under Sade’s spell. On the evening’s closer, “Cherish the Day,” we watched in awe as Sade slowly rose from the stage on a mechanically propelled platform. Higher and higher she went, rounding out at about 25 feet in the air. The projection screen behind her was all cityscapes and skyscrapers. You show me how deep love can be, she sang, towering over us, magniﬁcent, gorgeous, like something in a dream. — DAVID HUDNALL

Farm Aid Livestrong Sporting Park, August 13 Kansas is farm country, and Farm Aid has been around for 26 years. Yet 2011 marked the annual pitch.com

ANGELA C. BOND

After more than a decade’s absence from area stages, Fishbone returned to the Kansas City area on short notice on a chilly evening in March. Local promoters managed to lined up a show at a somewhat unlikely venue: the Aftershock, in Merriam. The long-running California ska rockers appeared before a small but loyal crowd. Fishbone quickly got down to the task at hand: rocking the ever-living shit out of each and every ass in that room. The set hewed close to the hits — “Lyin’ Ass Bitch” and “Party at Ground Zero” — and the funk seemed to ﬂow effortlessly from everyone onstage. (Fishbone has retained only two of its original members, but you’d never know it.) While the set at Aftershock came as an unpleasant surprise in the days afterward to fans not in the know, those of us who made it out were happily certain of our good fortune. — NICK SPACEK

B R O O K E VA N D E V E R

Fishbone The Aftershock, March 15

From left: Willie Nelson, Fleet Foxes and Sade

benefit concert’s first stop in the Sunflower State. No matter: Better to be invited late to the dance than not at all. Apart from a horrible parking situation and crazy-expensive beer, the freshly opened Livestrong Sporting Park proved itself a worthy summer venue. As for the music … John Mellencamp was impressively spry, and his gruff, gravelly voice hooked us into “Small Town.” The crowd was enraptured by scowlful old Neil Young, who reminded us what the event was about: supporting farmers by buying at least one local item every grocery trip. When Willie Nelson sang “Mamas Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys,” I finished the day sunburned and happy. — APRIL FLEMING

Foo Fighters Grand Boulevard between 13th and 14th streets, September 16 The Foo Fighters’ September performance inside Sprint Center was a typically rocking affair, but the surprise show they put on outside the arena prior to the set ended up making national headlines. The fame-seeking trolls of the Westboro Baptist Church had crept out of their caves to protest the Foos’ show, and so the Foos decided to stage a protest of their own. Outﬁtted in exaggerated trucker garb, the band members pulled up on a ﬂatbed trailer, instruments at the ready, in front of the “God continued on page 28 M O N T H X X–X X , 2 0 0 X

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hates fags” crowd. “I don’t care if you’re black or white or purple or green, Pennsylvanian or Transylvanian, Lady Gaga or Lady Antebellum,” Dave Grohl sang in a hokey country twang, “men lovin’ women and women lovin’ men and men lovin’ men and women lovin’ women.” — DAVID HUDNALL

What a treat to see Paul Simon in the intimate confines of the Midland. And what a pleasant surprise that, at 70, he still possesses such vitality. The crowd of olds, seated for most of the performance, didn’t match the singer-songwriter’s energy level, but it hardly mattered: We were in the presence of a true-blue pop legend. Simon led his nine-piece band through about 30 songs, many of them hits, some of them quiet old favorites, a few of them songs from recent albums that the crowd didn’t know so well — a dignified mix from a dignified man. On “That Was Your Mother,” he set down his acoustic guitar and performed some sprightly dance moves for us. “Hearts and Bones”? Not a dry eye in the house. It was a beautiful evening — not just a concert but an occasion for reflection, kind of what church is supposed to be like. — DAVID HUDNALL

Guns N’ Roses Sprint Center, November 12

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We know: It’s not really Guns N’ Roses. It’s just Axl Rose. And Axl Rose is an asshole. But listen: This show rocked. The seven-piece band (which includes three guitarists) played for almost three hours, the stage ablaze in pyrotechnics. Rose showed few signs of fatigue, crisscrossing the stage, running back and forth, spinning around and doing that dance move he’s been doing since the ’80s — the one where it looks like he’s trying to get dog shit off his shoe. Things wrapped up a little before 2 a.m., when the drumbeat to “Paradise City” sent the remaining crowd into a frenzy. On the ﬂoor, women danced and shook their titties under a litter of red streams of confetti. It was really, really loud. And it was all worth it. — BERRY ANDERSON

Watch the Throne Sprint Center, November 29 What to expect from the epic collision of egos 28

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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THE PITCH

M O N T H X X–X X , 2 0 0 X

CHRIS MULLINS

Paul Simon The Midland, November 8

From top: Paul Simon; Jay-Z and Kanye West

that was the Watch the Throne tour: Would Kanye throw a temper tantrum? Would Jay-Z, in flyover country on a Tuesday, phone it in? The answers to those questions: not really, and definitely not. What we got were two stages, rising video-cube platforms, laser pyramids and two and a half hours of nonstop fun, courtesy of two of the biggest names in hip-hop. “Make some noise for the genius that is Kanye,” Jay-Z asked of the crowd, as “I Want You Back” sped up into West’s beat for “Izzo.” On “Gold Digger,” Jay ceded the stage to Ye, shuffling around in the background, dutifully playing the role of hype man, interjecting “That ain’t right” into Kanye’s tale of lady woes. On “99 Problems,” Ye returned the favor, voicing the role of the meddling policeman. The hits were so bountiful and the performances so tight that when Kanye’s prima-donna moment inevitably arrived — he halted “All of the Lights” not once but twice, citing a flawed lighting cue — it almost seemed rehearsed, a natural extension of the sheer entertainment for which we’d all come. — DAVID HUDNALL AND A PRIL FLEMING pitch.com

music forecast

Kansas City “Knuckleheads is Kansas City’s premier roots music venue of the last 30 years.” - Bill Brownlee KC Star Voted KC’s Best Live Music Venue 6 years running

December 21

Miss Major

December 22

Cassie Taylor & Danny B Harvey

December 23

Lennon Bone (left) and David George (of Moaning Lisa)

Sonic Spectrum Tribute to ELO Around eight years ago, Hollywood focus-group testing apparently determined that “Mr. Blue Sky,” a mostly forgotten hit for Electric Light Orchestra in the 1970s, possessed a secret ability to pry disposable income from the general public. It was promptly put to use in an alarming number of TV commercials and movie trailers. On the one hand, this robbed the bouncy Beatles-like song of its specialness. But on the other, it introduced a new generation to ELO and helped expose curious parties to a side of the band beyond its (quite good) classic-rock radio-canon cuts “Evil Woman,” “Turn to Stone” and “Telephone Line.” Jeff Lynne and company will be saluted for their prog-pop genius, when space-rockers Be/Non (with guests) and OLEO (with a string section) take the stage as part of Robert Moore’s monthly tribute series. Monday, December 26, at RecordBar (1020 Westport Road, 816-753-5207)

Lennon Bone, with Kurt Vee, Chris Salveter and Samantha Clemons When not on tour drumming with the Springﬁeld band Ha Ha Tonka, Lennon Bone calls

Kansas City home. He has doubled down locally by founding a record label, Sharp County Records, which is now home to the mellow folk singer Clay Hughes and country-rock act Sons of Great Dane. Last month, Sharp County released Bone’s solo debut, Lost/Accolades. The ﬁrst half of the album is a funky mélange of electronic, hip-hop and soul elements; the latter half comprises barebones, front-porch songs — just Bone and an acoustic guitar. I’m hoping he plays both. Wednesday, December 28, at RecordBar (1020 Westport Road, 816-753-5207)

Moaning Lisa, with Dead Girls and Dream Wolf In 2004, Moaning Lisa, a classic-rock-sounding local act, relocated to Los Angeles and eventually re-formed as a band called Culture Killers. David George, the frontman, has since returned to Kansas City, performing around town with his new, more acoustically minded group, the David George Band. But over these holidays, George is semi-reuniting Moaning Lisa for a few shows. “We will be playing as many songs as we can remember,” George says. “A mixture

of the ﬁrst and second Moaning Lisa records … and songs from the Culture Killers’ EP that was basically a Moaning Lisa EP that was never released, or hardly released.” Thursday, December 22, at the Riot Room (4048 Broadway, 816-442-8179)

American Catastrophe, with Cadillac Flambe and Snakebite Orphans Who goes to bars on Christmas Eve? Drunks, for one! Also: the lonely. And the downtrodden, lest we forget. This holiday season, another group will be out and about: fans of tense, haunting Americana tunes. That’s because the local beloveds in American Catastrophe are performing at Davey’s Uptown. Fans of rootsy blues music might also turn up that evening, seeking the sounds of Cadillac Flambe. It’s possible that Davey’s is one of the only places in town to stop in for a pop, after midnight Mass. Saturday, December 24, at Davey’s Uptown Ramblers Club (3402 Main, 816-753-1909)

The Nace Brothers

December 28

Outlaw Jim & The Whiskey Benders December 30

New Years Eve Eve Trampled Under Foot Main Stage Jeff Bergen’s Elvis Show in Retro Lounge

FO R ECAST K EY BY D AV I D H U D N A L L ...................................Pick of the Week

............................................ Local Pride

..........Getting the Band Back Together

...................... Possible Jeff Lynne Afros

.................................... So Many Beards

................. Excessive Whiskey Drinking

............................... Vague Cosmic Vibe

.......................................Lots of Guitars

.......Alternative Christmas Celebration

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pitch.com D E C E M B E R 2 2 - 2 8 , 2 0 1 1 t h e p i t c h 29 pitch.com M O N T H X X–X X , 2 0 0 X T H E P I T C H 1

#12 – The Pitch – 12/29/11

concerts Nightlife listings are offered as a service to Pitch readers and are subject to space restrictions. Contact Clubs Editor Abbie Stutzer by e-mail (abbie.stutzer@pitch .com), fax (816-756-0502) or phone (816-218-6926). Continuing items must be resubmitted monthly.

THIS WEEK THURSDAY, DEC. 22 Danny B. Harvey, with Jaque and Jan from Levee Town: Knuckleheads Saloon, 2715 Rochester, 816-483-1456. Moaning Lisa, the Dead Girls, Dream Wolf: 8 p.m., $7. The Riot Room, 4048 Broadway, 816-442-8179.

SATURDAY, DEC. 24 Cadillac Flambe, American Catastrophe, Snakebite Orphans: Davey’s Uptown Ramblers Club, 3402 Main, 816-753-1909.

MONDAY, DEC. 26 Sonic Spectrum Tribute Series to Electric Light Orchestra: Featuring Be/Non, Kurt Mangold, and more. 9 p.m. RecordBar, 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207.

STEPHEN LYNCH

TUESDAY, DEC. 27

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2012

I Heart Heart Breaks, Ian Wiseman, Benjamin Lyman: 9 p.m. RecordBar, 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207.

WEDNESDAY, DEC. 28 Kurt Vee, Chris Salveter, Lennon Bone, Samantha Clemons: 10 p.m. RecordBar, 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207.

UPCOMING

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12/30 – Switch w/ Under the Covers 1/6 – Aaron Lewis – 2 Shows 1/7 – Kilroy Presents: Elvis Birthday Bash

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the pitch

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

V1_61909.12_4.776x10.75_4c_Ad.indd 1

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12/20/11 12:41 PM

Ryan Adams: Wed., Feb. 1. Municipal Auditorium/Music Hall, 301 W. 13th St. (in the Convention Center Complex), 816-513-5000. Allstar Weekend, the After Party: Sat., Jan. 14, 5:30 p.m. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. Anthrax, Testament, Death Angel: Thu., Jan. 26. The Midland, 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. Emilie Autumn: Wed., Jan. 25. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. Avicii: Thu., Jan. 12. The Midland, 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. Awolnation: Sun., Jan. 22, 7 p.m. The Riot Room, 4048 Broadway, 816-442-8179. Blind Pilot: Sat., March 3. The Granada, 1020 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-842-1390. Boondox, Cousin Cleetus, the Drp, Mars, Wicked Wayz, Freddy Grimes, Deranged: Tue., Jan. 17. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. The Chieftains: Wed., March 7. Kauffman Center for the Performing Arts, 1601 Broadway, 816-994-7200. Children of Bodom, Eluveitie, Revocation, Threat Signal: Mon., Feb. 6. The Granada, 1020 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-842-1390. The Civil Wars: Tue., Jan. 17. Liberty Hall, 644 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-749-1972. Cursive, Ume: Fri., March 2, 9 p.m. RecordBar, 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207. Dr. Dog: Thu., Feb. 2, 8:30 p.m., $15. The Granada, 1020 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-842-1390. D.R.U.G.S., Hit the Lights, Like Moths to Flames, Sparks the Rescue: Sun., Feb. 19. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. Jeff Dunham: Controlled Chaos: Thu., Feb. 2. Sprint Center, 1407 Grand, 816-283-7300. Every Avenue: Thu., Feb. 23. The Granada, 1020 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-842-1390. Excision, Liquid Stranger, Lucky Date: Mon., Feb. 20. The Midland, 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. Falling in Reverse, Oh, Sleeper, Skip the Foreplay: Sun., Feb. 5. The Granada, 1020 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-842-1390. Craig Finn: Sat., Feb. 11, 9 p.m. RecordBar, 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207. The Fresh Beat Band: Fri., Feb. 24, 5 p.m. The Midland, 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. Galactic: Thu., March 15. Liberty Hall, 644 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-749-1972.

Hail! Hornet, Zoroaster, and Slow Southern Steel (a film): Wed., Feb. 1, 7 p.m. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. The Head & the Heart, Drew Grove & the Pastor’s Wives: Sun., March 4. The Granada, 1020 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-842-1390. Kelley Hunt: Ring Out For Hunger Relief. Fri., Dec. 30. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. In Flames, Trivium, Veil of Maya, Kyng: Sat., Feb. 11. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. Jack’s Mannequin, Jukebox the Ghost, Allen Stone: Fri., Jan. 20. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. Zola Jesus: Fri., Feb. 24. The Granada, 1020 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-842-1390. Mat Kearney: Tue., Feb. 7. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. MANY MORE The Kills, Jeff the Brotherhood, Hunters: Sat., Jan. 21. The Midland, 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. The Lemonheads: Fri., Jan. 27. The Granada, 1020 ONLINE AT Massachusetts, Lawrence, PITCH.COM 785-842-1390. Aaron Lewis: Fri., Jan. 6, 8 & 10:30 p.m. VooDoo Lounge, Harrah’s Casino, 1 Riverboat Dr., North Kansas City, 816-472-7777. LoCash Cowboys, Burford, Lucas Cook: Fri., Feb. 17. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. Stephen Lynch: Fri., Feb. 17. VooDoo Lounge, Harrah’s Casino, 1 Riverboat Dr., North Kansas City, 816-472-7777. Shelby Lynne: Fri., Jan. 13. Folly Theater, 300 W. 12th St., 816-474-4444. Moe: Sun., Feb. 12. Liberty Hall, 644 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-749-1972. Mutemath: Thu., Feb. 16. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. Needtobreathe, Ben Rector: Sun., March 11. The Midland, 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. Brad Paisley: Thu., Jan. 19, 7:30 p.m. Sprint Center, 1407 Grand, 816-283-7300. Puscifer: Tue., March 6. Municipal Auditorium/Music Hall, 301 W. 13th St. (in the Convention Center Complex), 816-513-5000. Radiohead: Sun., March 11. Sprint Center, 1407 Grand, 816-283-7300. Railroad Earth: Wed., Feb. 8. The Granada, 1020 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-842-1390. Reverend Horton Heat, Larry and His Flask, the Goddamn Gallows: Sat., Feb. 25. The Bottleneck, 737 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785-841-5483. Randy Rogers Band, Kip Moore, Sam Sliva and the Good, Travis Marvin: Sat., Jan. 28, 6 p.m. The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-561-2560. Rusko, Nmzee: Wed., Feb. 29. Liberty Hall, 644 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-749-1972. Billy Joe Shaver: Sun., Jan. 15, 8:30 p.m. Knuckleheads Saloon, 2715 Rochester, 816-483-1456. JD Souther: Sat., Jan. 28. Knuckleheads Saloon, 2715 Rochester, 816-483-1456. George Strait, Martina McBride: Sat., Feb. 25. Sprint Center, 1407 Grand, 816-283-7300. Supersuckers, the Spittin’ Cobras: Wed., Feb. 8. The Bottleneck, 737 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785-841-5483. Symphony X, Iced Earth, Warbringer: Sun., Feb. 26. The Midland, 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. Paul Thorn and Ruthie Foster: Thu., March 8. Knuckleheads Saloon, 2715 Rochester, 816-483-1456. Tomorrows Bad Seeds, Pacific Dub: Wed., Feb. 15. The Bottleneck, 737 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785-841-5483. The Ultimate Doo-Wop Show: the Contours, Sylvester Potts, Jimmy Clanton, the Marcels, the Edsels, Paul & Paula, the Volumes, the Eldorados, Blue Suede Orchestra: Fri., March 2. The Midland, 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. VNV Nation, Straftanz: Thu., March 1. The Granada, 1020 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-842-1390. Jimmy Webb, Bob Walkenhorst, Jeff Porter: Fri., Feb. 10. Knuckleheads Saloon, 2715 Rochester, 816-483-1456. Ron White: Sat., March 10, 7 & 9:30 p.m. The Midland, 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. Whitehorse: Fri., March 9. RecordBar, 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207. William Elliott Whitmore: Fri., Feb. 10. The Granada, 1020 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-842-1390.

FIND

CONCERT LISTINGS

pitch.com

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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nightlife

The Indie on Main: 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. Open Mic, Low Dough Beer Night, 8 p.m. Jerry’s Bait Shop: 302 S.W. Main, Lee’s Summit, 816525-1871. Jerry’s Jam Night, 9 p.m.

VARIET Y

T H U R S DAY 2 2

The Brick: 1727 McGee, 816-421-1634. KC Songwriter Forum, 7-9 p.m.

ROCK/POP/INDIE

F R I DAY 2 3

Davey’s Uptown Ramblers Club: 3402 Main, 816-7531909. The Returners. Fat Fish Blue: 7260 N.W. 87th St., 816-759-3474. The Transients. Jazzhaus: 926-1/2 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-7491387. Dean Monkey and the Dropouts. RecordBar: 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207. The Quivers, Molly Picture Club, She’s a Keeper. Tomfooleries: 612 W. 47th St., 816-753-0555. Gov’t Cheez.

ROCK/POP/INDIE

B.B.’s Lawnside BBQ: 1205 E. 85th St., 816-822-7427. John Paul’s Flying Circus. Mike Kelly’s Westsider: 1515 Westport Rd., 816-9319417. Delta Dogs Blues Jam.

The Beaumont Club: 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-5612560. The Floozies, the EZ Brothers. The Brick: 1727 McGee, 816-421-1634. Sons of Great Dane, Filthy 13. Clarette Club: 5400 Martway, Mission, 913-384-0986. The ReHabaneros. Davey’s Uptown Ramblers Club: 3402 Main, 816-7531909. Bloodfeast. Raoul’s Velvet Room: 7222 W. 119th St., Overland Park, 913-469-0466. Disco Dick and the Mirror Balls. RecordBar: 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207. Cretin 66, Drop a Grand, 9 p.m. VooDoo Lounge: Harrah’s Casino, 1 Riverboat Dr., North Kansas City, 816-472-7777. Lyin’ Eyes with Platinum Express.

BLUES/FUNK/SOUL

Mosaic Lounge: 1331 Walnut, 816-679-0076. Mike Scott and Spinstyles. Saints Pub + Patio: 9720 Quivira, Lenexa, 913-4923900. DJ Brad Sager.

HIP-HOP The Bottleneck: 737 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785841-5483. When Hip-Hop Stole Christmas.

ACOUSTIC The Phoenix Jazz Club: 302 W. Eighth St., 816-2215299. Acoustic with Drew Freeland.

JAZZ The Blue Room: 1616 E. 18th St., 816-474-8463. Christmas with Langston, 7 p.m. Great Day Café: 7921 Santa Fe Dr., Overland Park, 913642-9090. Greg Tugman, 11 a.m.; Customer Quartet, 7 p.m. The Majestic Restaurant: 931 Broadway, 816-2211888. Paul Shinn. Westport Coffee House: 4010 Pennsylvania, 816-756-3222. Steve Cardenas and the Stan Kessler Quartet, 8 p.m., $10.

ROOTS/COUNTRY/BLUEGRASS PBR Big Sky Bar: 111 E. 13th St., 816-442-8145. Noe Palma.

DRUNKEN DISTRACTIONS/COMEDY/ BAR GAMES Bleachers Bar & Grill: 210 S.W. Greenwich Dr., Lee’s Summit, 816-623-3410. Ladies’ Night. Bulldog: 1715 Main, 816-421-4799. Brodioke, 9 p.m. The Buzz Coffee and Bar: 12056 W. 135th St., Overland Park. ABCs of Improv Comedy Show, 9 p.m. Buzzard Beach: 4110 Pennsylvania, 816-753-4455. Trivia, Ladies’ Night, 7 p.m. Ernie Biggs Dueling Piano Bar: 4115 Mill, 816-5612444. “You Sing it” Live Band Karaoke. Improv Comedy Club and Dinner Theater: 7260 N.W. 87th St., 816-759-5233. Craig Peters and friends. Johnny’s Tavern: 13410 W. 62nd Terr., Shawnee, 913962-5777. Live Trivia, 9 p.m. Johnny’s Tavern: 8262 Mission, Prairie Village, 913901-0322. Boogie Bingo, 8 p.m. McFadden’s Sports Saloon: 1330 Grand Ave., 816-4711330. All In Thursdays. Missie B’s: 805 W. 39th St., 816-561-0625. Karaoke on the main ﬂoor, 10 p.m. RecordBar: 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207. Trivia Clash, 7 p.m., $5. Saints Pub + Patio: 9720 Quivira, Lenexa, 913-4923900. Ladies’ Night. Skeeter’s: 6505 Nieman Rd., Merriam, 913-912-1191. TakeOver Thursdays With Mysunderstood, 8 p.m. Westport Flea Market: 817 Westport Rd., 816-9311986. Trivia, 9 p.m.

EASY LISTENING Jerry’s Bait Shop: 13412 Santa Fe Trail Dr., Lenexa, 913894-9676. Interactive Acoustic with Jason Kayne, 9 p.m.

OPEN MIC/JAM SESSIONS Czar: 1531 Grand, 816-221-2244. Vi Tran and Katie Gilchrist’s Weekly Jam, 10 p.m.

Coda: 1744 Broadway, 816-569-1747. Blackhorse Revival, Jerry Dowell, 9 p.m. Jazzhaus: 926-1/2 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-7491387. Billy Ebeling and the Late for Dinner Band, 7 p.m.; the Brody Buster Band with Brother Bagman, 10 p.m. The Levee: 16 W. 43rd St., 816-561-2821. The Groove Agency. Paddy O’Shay’s: 11300 W. 135th St., Overland Park, 913-393-1622. Samantha Fish. The Phoenix Jazz Club: 302 W. Eighth St., 816-2215299. JLove Band. Trouser Mouse: 625 N.W. Mock Ave., Blue Springs, 816220-1222. The Ben Miller Band.

DJ The Eighth Street Taproom: 801 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785-841-6918. Blitzen’s Soul Clap featuring DJs Rawberto, Packin’ Pete. Replay Lounge: 946 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785749-7676. Lawrence Peters spins the Mutant Goods. Saints Pub + Patio: 9720 Quivira, Lenexa, 913-4923900. DJ Naylor.

HIP-HOP The Bottleneck: 737 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785841-5483. AJ Knudson, Uncontrolled Substance. The Riot Room: 4048 Broadway, 816-442-8179. Chef Boy, Cash Image, Bishop, the Popper, Nelson EL, Don Juan, Xta-C, T-Rell.

ACOUSTIC Bar West: 7174 Renner Rd., Shawnee, 913-248-9378. Dan Brockert. Mike Kelly’s Westsider: 1515 Westport Rd., 816-9319417. Eddie Delahunt.

JAZZ The Blue Room: 1616 E. 18th St., 816-474-8463. Indigo Hour featuring Lady D, 5:30 p.m.; Bob Bowman and Bow Dog, 8:30 p.m. The Majestic Restaurant: 931 Broadway, 816-2211888. Paul Shinn. The Phoenix Jazz Club: 302 W. Eighth St., 816-221-5299. MANY MORE Lonnie McFadden, 4:30 p.m. R Bar & Restaurant: 1617 Genessee, 816-471-1777. Grand Marquis. Take Five Coffee + Bar: 5336 W. 151st St., Overland ONLINE AT Park, 913-948-5550. Michael PITCH.COM Shults with Andrew Ouellette. Thai Place: 9359 W. 87th St., Overland Park, 913-649-5420. Jerry Hahn.

FIND

12/25 12/30 12/31

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CLUB LISTINGS

ROOTS/COUNTRY/BLUEGRASS Wil Jenny’s Tables and Tap: 6700 W. 135th St., Overland Park, 913-897-1114. Outlaw Junkies.

DRUNKEN DISTR ACTIONS/COMEDY/ BAR GAMES Balanca’s: 1809 Grand, 816-474-6369. Waking Jericho, Tay Diggs, Miss-G, FlyMuzik Ent, Da Out Crowd, Charm, Jea Bella, MacFame N MGA, and more. Bleachers Bar & Grill: 210 S.W. Greenwich Dr., Lee’s Summit, 816-623-3410. Karaoke, DJ.

pitch.com D E C E M B E R 2 2 - 2 8 , 2 0 1 1 t h e p i t c h 33 pitch.com M O N T H X X–X X , 2 0 0 X T H E P I T C H 1

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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Great Day Café: 7921 Santa Fe Dr., Overland Park, 913642-9090. Open Mic, 7 p.m.

REGGAE RecordBar: 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207. New Riddim, 6 p.m.

SINGER-SONGWRITER Knuckleheads Saloon: 2715 Rochester, 816-483-1456. Sky Smeed in the Retro Lounge, 8 p.m.

VARIET Y FOKL Center: 556 Central, 913-207-9549. Mouthbreathers, Muscle Worship, Scammers, FOKL Festivus, 8 p.m., $7.

S AT U R DAY 2 4 BLUES/FUNK/SOUL B.B.’s Lawnside BBQ: 1205 E. 85th St., 816-822-7427. Mama Ray Jazz Meets Blues Jam, 2 p.m. Trouser Mouse: 625 N.W. Mock Ave., Blue Springs, 816220-1222. The Nace Brothers.

DJ The Well: 7421 Broadway, 816-361-1700. DJ Ashton Martin.

ACOUSTIC Mike Kelly’s Westsider: 1515 Westport Rd., 816-9319417. John Johnson Acoustic Showcase.

DRUNKEN DISTRACTIONS/COMEDY/ BAR GAMES The Eighth Street Taproom: 801 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785-841-6918. Dave Shelton’s Holiday Jam, 10 p.m. Hurricane Allie’s Bar and Grill: 5541 Merriam Dr., Shawnee, 913-217-7665. Ultimate DJ Karaoke, 8:30 p.m. MoJo’s Bar & Grill: 1513 S.W. Hwy. 7, Blue Springs. Happy hour, free pool, 1-4 p.m.

REGGAE Czar: 1531 Grand, 816-221-2244. KC Reggae Party.

S U N DAY 2 5 ROCK/POP/INDIE Jerry’s Bait Shop: 13412 Santa Fe Trail Dr., Lenexa, 913-894-9676. The Stolen Winnebagos, 9 p.m. Trouser Mouse: 625 N.W. Mock Ave., Blue Springs, 816220-1222. The Slowdown, In the Grove, 9 p.m.

DJ The Beaumont Club: 4050 Pennsylvania, 816-5612560. KC Xmas 2011 featuring KC DJs. Davey’s Uptown Ramblers Club: 3402 Main, 816-7531909. DJ Upside Down.

DRUNKEN DISTRACTIONS/COMEDY/ BAR GAMES Jazzhaus: 926-1/2 Massachusetts, Lawrence, 785-7491387. No band, no cover, festive fun, 8 p.m., free.

VARIET Y RecordBar: 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207. Art Battle VII: Schroeder vs. Tulipana, Christmas Charity Battle, 8 p.m., free.

M O N DAY 2 6 ROCK/POP/INDIE Jerry’s Bait Shop: 302 S.W. Main, Lee’s Summit, 816525-1871. Making Movies. Tomfooleries: 612 W. 47th St., 816-753-0555. The Goods.

LUNCH • DINNER • DRINK • MUSIC • ART

THUR 12/22

Davey’s Uptown Ramblers Club: 3402 Main, 816-7531909. DJ Dustin, DJ Big Brother.

DRUNKEN DISTR ACTIONS/COMEDY/ BAR GAMES The Brick: 1727 McGee, 816-421-1634. Rural Grit Happy Hour, 6 p.m.; karaoke with Kelly Bleachmaxx, 10:30 p.m. Hamburger Mary’s: 101 Southwest Blvd., 816-8421919. Mary-oke with Chad Slater, 8 p.m. Improv Comedy Club and Dinner Theater: 7260 N.W. 87th St., 816-759-5233. Craig Peters and Mike Baldwin. JR’s Place: 20238 W. 151st St., Olathe, 913-254-1307. Texas Hold ’em, 7:30 p.m. Missie B’s: 805 W. 39th St., 816-561-0625. MANic Monday on the main ﬂoor, 10 p.m., free. MoJo’s Bar & Grill: 1513 S.W. Hwy. 7, Blue Springs. Pool and dart leagues; happy hour, free pool, 4-6 p.m. Nara: 1617 Main, 816-221-6272. Brodioke, 10 p.m. RecordBar: 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207. Sonic Spectrum Music Trivia, 7 p.m., $5. Westport Flea Market: 817 Westport Rd., 816-9311986. Texas Hold ’em, 8 p.m.

OPEN MIC/JAM SESSIONS

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MON 12/26

RURAL GRIT 6PM KARAOKE 10PM

TUE 12/27

BITCH BINGO & BLVD BEER W/ALICIA SOLO 8PM

WED 12/28

BURGER NIGHT

FRI 12/30

MARCO’S V7 & FRIENDS

SAT 12/31

NYE HAPPY HOUR KATY & GO GO 4-7PM

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FRI 12/23

JAZZ The Blue Room: 1616 E. 18th St., 816-474-8463. Blue Monday Jam featuring Horace Washington, 7 p.m. The Buzz Coffee and Bar: 12056 W. 135th St., Overland Park. Passport, 7:30 p.m. Great Day Café: 7921 Santa Fe Dr., Overland Park, 913642-9090. Greg Tugman, 11 a.m. Jazz: 1823 W. 39th St., 816-531-5556. Jazzbo.

SAT: 9AM - 3PM

OPEN MIC/JAM SESSIONS

BRICKFAST

ComedyCity at Westport Flea Market: 817 Westport Rd., 816-842-2744. Major League Improv, 7:30 p.m. Czar: 1531 Grand, 816-221-2244. U:Move Xmas Party. Hurricane Allie’s Bar and Grill: 5541 Merriam Dr., Shawnee, 913-217-7665. Ultimate DJ Karaoke, 8:30 p.m. The Indie on Main: 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. Ladies’ Night, Low Dough lady specials, 10 p.m. JR’s Place: 20238 W. 151st St., Olathe, 913-254-1307. Debbioke, 9:30 p.m. MoJo’s Bar & Grill: 1513 S.W. Hwy. 7, Blue Springs. Happy hour, free pool, 4-6 p.m. Retro Downtown Drinks & Dance: 1518 McGee, 816421-4201. Trivia Riot, 7 p.m. Snow & Co.: 1815 Wyandotte St., 816-214-8921. Festivus for the Restofus.

SUN 1/1

HAIR OF THE DOG DAY 2012 -11AM

THREADZ BY HEADZ FOR THE HEADS

CLOTHING - JEWELRY ACCESSORIES - ART 1607 Westport Rd. KCMO 816-442-8400 Mon - Thurs 12-9pm • Fri - Sat 12-10pm • Sun 12-6pm

The Bottleneck: 737 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785841-5483. Open Mic Night. Czar: 1531 Grand, 816-221-2244. Grand Jam hosted by Supermassive Black Holes, 9 p.m.

T U E S DAY 2 7 ROCK/POP/INDIE Czar: 1531 Grand, 816-221-2244. Savor the Sun, Sneaky Creeps, Nate Graybill. Davey’s Uptown Ramblers Club: 3402 Main, 816-7531909. Fail Inc., Pizza Party Massacre, Uncouth. Jerry’s Bait Shop: 302 S.W. Main, Lee’s Summit, 816525-1871. Drew6.

Mon - Thurs 12-9pm • Fri - Sat 12-10pm • Sun 12-6pm

BLUES/FUNK/SOUL B.B.’s Lawnside BBQ: 1205 E. 85th St., 816-822-7427. Trampled Under Foot.

ROOTS/COUNTRY/BLUEGRASS Mike Kelly’s Westsider: 1515 Westport Rd., 816-9319417. Davis Show Jam.

DJ Coda: 1744 Broadway, 816-569-1747. DJ Whatshisname, service industry night, 10 p.m. Ernie Biggs Dueling Piano Bar: 4115 Mill, 816-5612444. DJ night.

ACOUSTIC RecordBar: 1020 Westport Rd., 816-753-5207. Rock Paper Scissors, 6 p.m., free.

DRUNKEN DISTR ACTIONS/COMEDY/ BAR GAMES The Eighth Street Taproom: 801 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785-841-6918. Maggie Allen Stand-Up. Flying Saucer: 101 E. 13th St., 816-221-1900. Trivia Bowl, 7:30 & 10 p.m., free. Improv Comedy Club and Dinner Theater: 7260 N.W. 87th St., 816-759-5233. Craig Peters and Mike Baldwin. Jerry’s Bait Shop: 302 S.W. Main, Lee’s Summit, 816525-1871. xTreme Music Bingo. JR’s Place: 20238 W. 151st St., Olathe, 913-254-1307. Buttwiser’s Bash with DJ Double D, 10 p.m., free. MoJo’s Bar & Grill: 1513 S.W. Hwy. 7, Blue Springs. Pool and dart leagues; happy hour, free pool, 4-6 p.m. The Roxy: 7230 W. 75th St., Overland Park, 913-2366211. Karaoke. Westport Flea Market: 817 Westport Rd., 816-9311986. Chess Club, 7 p.m.

OPEN MIC/JAM SESSIONS Bleachers Bar & Grill: 210 S.W. Greenwich Dr., Lee’s Summit, 816-623-3410. Open Mic Acoustic Jam. The Phoenix Jazz Club: 302 W. Eighth St., 816-2215299. Open Jam with Everette DeVan, 7 p.m.

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

THE PITCH

Stanford’s Comedy Club: 1867 Village West Pkwy., Kansas City, Kan., 913-400-7500. Open Mic Night.

SINGER-SONGWRITER Harleys & Horses: 7210 N.E. 43rd St., 816-452-2660. Scott Ford Songwriters Showcase, 7 p.m.

W E D N E S DAY 2 8 BLUES/FUNK/SOUL B.B.’s Lawnside BBQ: 1205 E. 85th St., 816-822-7427. Shinetop Jr. Knuckleheads Saloon: 2715 Rochester, 816-483-1456. Gospel Lounge with Carl Butler, 7:30 p.m. The Levee: 16 W. 43rd St., 816-561-2821. The Lonnie Ray Blues Band, 9:30 p.m. The Riot Room: 4048 Broadway, 816-442-8179. Mouth, 3 Son Green, Mouth’s Holiday Party. Trouser Mouse: 625 N.W. Mock Ave., Blue Springs, 816220-1222. Salty Dawg.

ROOTS/COUNTRY/BLUEGRASS Knuckleheads Saloon: 2715 Rochester, 816-483-1456. Outlaw Jim and the Whiskey Benders. The Phoenix Jazz Club: 302 W. Eighth St., 816-2215299. Piano time with T.J. Erhardt, 7 p.m.

DJ Buzzard Beach: 4110 Pennsylvania, 816-753-4455. Live DJ, midnight. Saints Pub + Patio: 9720 Quivira, Lenexa, 913-4923900. DJ Pure.

HIP-HOP The Bottleneck: 737 New Hampshire, Lawrence, 785841-5483. Ma$h, the Winner’s Circle, KP.

JAZZ Great Day Café: 7921 Santa Fe Dr., Overland Park, 913642-9090. Greg Tugman, 11 a.m. The Majestic Restaurant: 931 Broadway, 816-2211888. Rich Hill, 6 p.m.

DRUNKEN DISTR ACTIONS/COMEDY/ BAR GAMES Angels Rock Bar: 1323 Walnut, 816-896-3943. Fear Factor Wednesdays. Beer Kitchen: 435 Westport Rd., 816-389-4180. Brodioke. Danny’s Bar and Grill: 13350 College Blvd., Lenexa, 913345-9717. Trivia and karaoke with DJ Smooth, 8 p.m. Hamburger Mary’s: 101 Southwest Blvd., 816-8421919. Charity Bingo with Valerie Versace, 8 p.m. Improv Comedy Club and Dinner Theater: 7260 N.W. 87th St., 816-759-5233. Sean Tyler presents Hilarious Hump Day Showcase. The Indie on Main: 1228 Main, 816-283-9900. Karaoke, 9:30 p.m. Jerry’s Bait Shop: 302 S.W. Main, Lee’s Summit, 816-5251871. Club Jerry’s, reverse happy hour, 9 p.m.-midnight. JR’s Place: 20238 W. 151st St., Olathe, 913-254-1307. Karaoke with the Queen, 9:30 p.m.-1 a.m. Nara: 1617 Main, 816-221-6272. Ladies’ Night. The Roxy: 7230 W. 75th St., Overland Park, 913-2366211. Karaoke. Tonahill’s South: 10817 E. Truman Rd., Independence, 816-252-2560. Ladies’ Night with DJ Thorny, 6 p.m. Wilde’s Chateau 24: 2412 Iowa, Lawrence, 785-8561514. Pride Night, 8 p.m.

EASY LISTENING Fuel: 7300 W. 119th St., Overland Park, 913-451-0444. Colby & Mole.

OPEN MIC/JAM SESSIONS Bleachers Bar & Grill: 210 S.W. Greenwich Dr., Lee’s Summit, 816-623-3410. Open Blues and Funk Jam with Syncopation. Jerry’s Bait Shop: 13412 Santa Fe Trail Dr., Lenexa, 913-894-9676. Jam Night, 9 p.m. Tonahill’s 3 of a Kind: 11703 E. 23rd St., Independence, 816-833-5021. Open Jam 7:30-11 p.m.

R O C K A B I L LY Aftershock Bar & Grill: 5240 Merriam Dr., Merriam, 913-384-5646. The Rumblejetts, the Handholders, 8 p.m.

VARIET Y Czar: 1531 Grand, 816-221-2244. Indie Hit Makers, 6 p.m. Davey’s Uptown Ramblers Club: 3402 Main, 816-7531909. Amy Farrand’s Weirdo Wednesday Social Club, 7 p.m., no cover.

THE PITCH

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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The Daily P. Only at p

5807 Body Rubs Topless super busty mixed beauty. $100 special. 30, 60, 90 min & prostate 913-704-9390 or 816-783-7575.

*Satin Dolls* Topless Barbies $100 Special Exotic body rubs upgrades available 816-349-7676 Thirty Something and very sexy Busty, Seductive Italian No Rush Renee 913-562-4189 M4M Therapeutic Body Rub- Enjoy a full body relaxing body rub for only $40 per hour, in the privacy of my home. Hours are flexible. Call Tony to set an appointment 913-269-5785

NEW LOCATION

Goddesses Relaxation Palace come relax and be pampered by us the right way!! All Attractive Therapist! Helping KC Relax for over 12 years ASK ABOUT SPECIALS by appt. only!! 6am-8:30pm in call 8am to 2am out call Mature only Metro Area Out Call Grandview & Downtown In Call

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5910 Adult Clubs

CLUBEROTICAKC.COM # 1 Lifestyle House Party Don't miss our XXXmas Party This FRI-SAT Party with Poker in his Limo ( call for info ) (913)238-4339 Roomate wanted poker@cluberoticakc.com

$10 BEST PHONE SEX $10 Asian Nymphs; Ebony Hotties; 40+Ladies; Barely Legal Coeds; Or Fetish & Fantasy. Just call: 1-866-515-FOXY (3699) U CHOOSE THE MODEL 100s of SEXY LATINO SINGLES are waiting to chat with you. Call Axxess NOW! It's FREE to try! 18+ 816-303-0303 913-312-1212 Real, Discreet, Local Connections. Call FREE! 816-533-0048 or 800-2101010 18+ livelinks.com

5805 Licensed Massage ADAM'S DEEP TISSUE & BODYWORK NOW OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK! Pvt Studio Away From Home, St. Joe, MO Nationally Board Certified Masseur since 2004 AdamsDeepTissue.com AdamsDeepTissue@live.c om PH: 816-390-3601 RELAXATION MASSAGE 816-896-9344 or 913-236-6733 In/Out lic#PV04-wilk

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BACCALA' STRIP CLUB NOW HIRING DANCERS Contact Frank 5pm-12am Mon-Sat 816-510-4405

5960 Phone Entertainment Hot Guys! Hot Chat! Hot Fun! Call FREE! 816-533-0046 or 800-698-6986 18+ interactivemale.com

pitch.com

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

THE PITCH

LICENSED MASSAGE

savage love Probing Probabilities Dear Dan: My sexy GGG husband and I fuck a hot, young “good friend” about every other week. We started out wearing condoms but had the safe-sex conversation, and our friend isn’t banging anyone else. So we moved to condom-free sex. A month ago, BY our friend fucked me but came DAN on my tits. My husband fucked me, too — that night, the day S AVA G E before, the day after. Now I’m pregnant. I’m 99 percent sure that it’s my husband’s, but a tiny part of me worries that it could be our good friend’s. Could our “other” sex partner’s pre-come get me pregnant? Pregnant in Threesome Dear PIT: Pre-come can contain “live, viable, pregnancy-inducing sperm,” says Dr. Joel Maurer, assistant professor in OB/GYN and dean of admissions for the Michigan State University College of Human Medicine. It’s why many regard “pulling out” an ineffective birth-control method. “For every 100 women who use withdrawal correctly, four will become pregnant every year — this number jumps to 27 if not used correctly, Maurer says. (For every 100 women who use condoms correctly, two will become pregnant, 18 if they’re using condoms incorrectly, which is why some argue that withdrawal is nearly as effective as condoms.) Sperm doesn’t get mixed up in the seminal ﬂuid until the guy starts to ejaculate. If your good friend didn’t have an orgasm shortly before he fucked you and he didn’t come inside you and there were no stray swimmers in his pre-come, odds are slim that the baby is his. “A paternity test after delivery of the child is the safest advice I can give, should it remain an important issue,” Maurer says. “An amniocentesis can make this ‘diagnosis’ before delivery, but the procedure comes with a small risk of pregnancy loss. As such, most doctors would consider it unethical to perform amniocentesis for the sole purpose of paternity testing.” To other nonmonogamous straight couples out there: Using condoms with others is important not just to prevent disease but to prevent paternity scares. And you should use condoms with your other, male or female, regardless of safe-sex conversations. You have no way of knowing for sure that your other doesn’t have other others.

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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Dear Dan: After an impromptu sex session that left me feeling sleepy and sappy, my partner, who typically feels sleepy and sappy herself after sex, texted someone! The fury that arose within me could not be contained! Neither the text message itself nor its recipient was the issue (it was to a co-worker about a work matter); the issue was that she couldn’t wait a few minutes to hug and kiss and say “that was hot” before sending a text?

She thinks I’m overreacting and blames it on me being premenstrual. She has not apologized. Isn’t post-sex texting tacky? Wasn’t That Fucked? Dear WTF: Post-sex texting is tacky and thoughtless. But if one ill-timed text unleashed a “fury that could not be contained” — if you raged at your girlfriend for being uncharacteristically inconsiderate — then yours was the greater offense. Your girlfriend owes you an apology, but you owe her a bigger one, and yours should come first. Dear Dan: I’m a submissive gay man. All anal-sex guides stress that when done right, anal sex should cause no pain. But what if I want pain? Over three years, my boyfriend and I have proceeded from having lots of anal foreplay to lube-it-up-andstick-it-in. I love it, and once it stops hurting, as it always does after a while, I have amazing orgasms. So does he. There’s a definite line between the arousing kind of pain and too much pain. That line has moved closer to more intense pain, and I’m worried about injury. We’re not sticking progressively bigger objects up my ass, just the same object with less foreplay. Is this risky? Boy Used to Taking Dear BUTT: It depends. You can enjoy anal without incurring too great a risk of injury as long as your boyfriend isn’t shoving his entire dick up your ass in one thrust. If he’s pushing his dick in you gradually but firmly, giving your poor butt a chance to relax and adjust as he “forces” his way in, then you’ll probably be OK. (Probably is the word of the day.) That said, making your asshole the focus of erotic pain isn’t a sensational idea. Anal fissures and tears take forever to heal, and even a small one can put your ass out of commission for months. A big one can put your ass out of commission for years. There are plenty of ways your boyfriend can make you hurt during anal without brutalizing your hole. He can slap your ass, yank on a pair of tit clamps, pull your hair, crank up the juice on an e-stim unit. You’ve got nerve endings all over your body, not just in and around your hole. Your boyfriend can work some of those other nerves while he works your hole. Dear Dan: I’m a gay man in my 20s. Can we get a column or two with questions addressing the problems facing gay men in their 20s? Something for gay boys at that stage of life that falls between “it gets better” and “it gets domestic”? Feeling Left Out Dear FLO: Hit me with some Q’s, gay boys, and I’ll dedicate a couple of columns to your issues and tissues. Have a question for Dan Savage? E-mail him at mail@savagelove.net

Classified

Employment

FREE ONLINE ADS & PHOTOS AT KC.BACKPAGE.COM TO PLACE YOUR AD TODAY, CALL 816.218.6721 5505 Automotive Services **************** DONATE YOUR CAR! Tax Write-off/Fast Pickup Running or not. Cancer Fund Of America. (888) 269-6482 Transmission, General Auto Repair, Diagnostics. 4 Aces Auto Repair 816-241-9030 CASH FOR CARS Wanted / Unwanted Autos, Wrecked, Damaged or Broken. Cash Paid abcautorecycling.com 913-271-9406 CASH PAID FOR JUNK/UNWANTED VEHICLES. Call J.G.S. Auto Wrecking For Quote 913-321-2716 or Toll Free 1-877-320-2716 U-PICK-IT SELF SERVICE AUTO PARTS $$ Paying Top Dollar $$ For Junk Cars & Trucks Missouri: 816-241-7548 Kansas: 913-321-1000 5525 Legal Services $99 DIVORCE $99 Simple, Uncontested + Filing Fee. Don Davis. 816-5311330

Law Offices of David M. Lurie DWI, SOLICITATION, TRAFFIC DEFENSE, INTERNET-BASED CRIMES 816-221-5900 http://www.the-law.com U.S. Immigration Law Free consulations, reasonable fees.Service member and repeat client discounts. Law Office of Joseph W. Alfred 913-538-6720 www.lojwa.com 5530 Misc. Services WANTS TO purchase minerals and other oil & gas interests. Send details to P.O. Box 13557, Denver, Co 80201 5610 Musician Services

$30/HOUR STUDIO TIME Prepay Only BRAND NEW STUDIO! Credit/Debit Available Call Dan Smith 816-214-6088

BAND REHEARSAL ROOMS MOVE IN SPECIAL NOW THROUGH DECEMBER 31ST 2011 $300 FOR SINGLE ROOM $500 FOR DOUBLE ROOM THE REHEARSAL FACILITY HAS: 24/7 365 day access 24-hr. video surveillance Covered loading & unloading area. Game room with vending machines. Clean rest rooms. Call NOW for more information & tour. STUDIO CITY KC 615 E. 6th Street 816-474-5920 BE A PROFESSIONAL Music Engineer/ Producer 2-Year Certificate Program CALL NOW For Winter Enrollment Starting January. For Information & Tour Call BRC Audio 913-621-2300 www.brcaudio.com 5625 Plug The Band SULTRY NEW YEARS EVE CARIBBEAN BASH featuring A La Mode and El Mambo Orch. ALL INCLUSIVE RESERVE TODAY elmamboworld.com or call 816-809-3496

LAST CALL & THE ROCK SHOW LIVE with Very Special guest The Fall Down Drunks.

Saturday Jan. 7th Harleys & Horses (across from Worlds of Fun)

1000+ lasers GoGo Dancers Multi Award Winning Rock-N-Roll 1 night only A MUST SEE PERFORMANCE 5810 Health & Wellness: General Auto Insurance STARTING @ $40 SR22,, non-owners Life & Health Insurance MO: 816-531-1000 KS: 913-239-0900 www.KCinsurance.com 5815 Mind-Body-Spirit

5103 Auditions / Show Biz

5130 Entertainment Jobs

UP TO $300 A DAY NO EXPERIENCE REQUIRED ACTORS/MOVIE EXTRAS/MODELS Stand in the background for a major film. All looks needed. Speak to a live rep 1-888-428-9111

Talking on the job again? Are you friendly, flirty, and love to talk? Then come work for a long-standing national entertainment company that offers the highest starting pay in the industry! Hourly base pay rate of $9 - $10 with opportunity for bonuses. Dont be misled by deceptive ads and empty promises. Get paid by the hour, not by the minute or call. No trolling, no dispatch. There are day and evening shifts available for both P/T & F/T positions. www.blvdent.com (800)211-3152

NOW CASTING - Major TV Network seeks people ages 15-22. Are you/someone you know in an unhealthy dating relationship? Email: relationshipTVcasting@gm ail.com. 5105 Career / Training / Schools ACTIVISM

Campaign Jobs! Work to end child poverty with Grassroots Campaigns on behalf of Save the Children. Earn $1,200 to $2,000/Month. Full Time, Part Time & Career Positions Available. Call Mitch: 816-960-7296

5167 Restaurant / Hotel / Club Jobs BECOME A BARTENDER! Up to $300 a day. No exp. necessary. Training Course Available. 1-800-965-6520 x 270.

LEARN BARTENDING!! Big fun, Big money, Two week program-Job placement assistance FT, PT, Parties, Weddings, Always in demand! International School of Professional Bartending Call 816-753-3900 TODAY !! Career Education.

New Year...

New You!

THE OCEAN Corp. 10840 Rockley Road, Houston, Texas 77099. Train for a new career. *Underwater Welder. Commercial Diver. *NDT/Weld Inspector. Job Placement Assistance. Financial Aid avail for those who qualify 1.800.321.0298

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HOT PROPERTIES

www.pitch.com/hot-properties.

Let Her Kansas City Make You Over!!! Be sure to pick up February & March Issues of Her Kansas City to see the makeovers! Participating Salons:

PSYCHIC ERICA'S PSYCHIC STUDIO AstrologyCrystal-Palm-Tarot. Reunites lovers. Helps problems. Never fails. No false promises. Call 816-965-7125 Member of the BBB

SALON

Find Her on facebook! Interested in Sponsorships please call 816-218-6759 Sponsord in part by

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

THE PITCH

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

pitch.com

Employment FREE ONLINE ADS & PHOTOS AT KC.BACKPAGE.COM TO PLACE YOUR AD TODAY, CALL 816.218.6721

HOTEL HILTON PRESIDENT IS NOW HIRING Banquet Cook PM Servers Valet Banquet Servers Night Audit Other Openings available, call our Job Hotline. 816-303-1696 Pre-screen Interviews: Mon, Tues, Wed, Friday 8:30amNoon & 1-3pm The Hilton President Kansas City 1329 Baltimore HOTEL HILTON PRESIDENT IS NOW HIRING Cooks Restaurant Supervisor Bar Supervisor Valet PM Servers Other Openings available, call our Job Hotline. 816-303-1696 Pre-screen Interviews: Mon, Tues, Wed, Friday 8:30am- Noon & 1-3pm The Hilton President Kansas City 1329 Baltimore 5172 Sales & Marketing Jobs Entry Level Sales/Marketing No Exp. needed/ Training Provided/ Opportunity to Advance to MGMT. Submit Resume at www.mp-inc.org under contact us or call 816912-2890 The PITCH is currently seeking Multimedia Advertising Sales Pros for our Classified Advertising Department! This is an inside sales position, but does require some outside sales.

5177 Salon Jobs Lenexa Salon Seeks Independent Contractor For Booth Rental. Established Clinetele Needed. Call Jaime at 913-558-2242

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HOT PROPERTIES

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5185 Misc. Jobs LIBERTY TAX NOW HIRING Bilingual Receptionist( Olathe Location only)Wavers, Marketers & Experienced Tax Preparers for all Locations: Overlandpark@libertytax. com or call 913-742-2609 Licensed Massage Therapist wanted. No Rental Fees/All Supplies Furnished. Must have 500 or more hours & transcript. 40% paid daily & Great F/T & P/T, No Sundays, flexible evening hours. Call 913-400-2540 NOW HIRING FOR KU BASKETBALL CONCERTS CONVENTIONS Event Staff, Ushers Ticket Takers Apply in person: 4050 Pennsylvania Ste.111 KCMO or apply online: www.crowdsystems.com Undercover Shoppers Get paid to shop. Retail/Dining establishments need undercover clients to judge quality/ customer service. Earn up to $150 a day. Call (800)722-6351 5190 Business Opportunities Become Self Employed with an elite opportunity. You can make residual income for you and your family's success. Get your position immediately! Call Donnel: 816-316-6717

You must: * Be a great multi-tasker * Self - Motivating

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* Have attention to detail * Be able to operate on a revolving deadline * Have strong organizational skills Some sales, customer service and/or media experience is required. 2-3 years of Media Sales Experience that includes a strong digital focus is preferred. Minimum expected annual income potential of $32K - $34K with no cap. Benefits include medical, dental, vision, Life, Disability 401K and more!! Please send your resume to: Lisa.Kelley@pitch.com

MYSTERY SHOPPERS Get Paid To Shop! Retail/Dining Establishments Need Undercover Clients To Judge Quality/Customer Service. Earn Up To $150 A Day. Call 877-737-7559

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www.MoneyMakingClub.ORG $12,000+ / month attainable (913) 526-5150 www.MoneyMakingClub. ORG

$12,000+ / month attainable (913) 526-5150

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

THE PITCH

Real Estate

Rentals

FREE ONLINE ADS & PHOTOS AT KC.BACKPAGE.COM TO PLACE YOUR AD TODAY, CALL 816.218.6721 5210 Homes For Sale

KS-KU MED ALL AREAS ALL PRICES 913-381-6789 www.kcmlslistings.com Western Auto Loft, 1bed 1bath Hardwoods, granite, garden unit With large patio, 150s. Wont last long!!! Sharon Sigman 913-381-6789

5307 Rooms For Rent

$455-$560 913-236-8038 MINUTES TO KU MED. Spacious Studios, 1 Bedroom, 2 Bedrooms & Rental Homes Minutes to KU, UMKC, Plaza & Westport. Laundry Facilities, Off Street Parking, Pool, Water & Trash Paid. Please visit www.kc-apartments.com Washita Club Apartments manager@kc-apartments.com

KS-SHAWNEE $575-$595 913-671-8218 December Special. First months rent free plus $99 Deposit. 2 Bedroom, 1 Bath. Washer/Dryer in some units.

Gentleman seeks lady to share farm house in the Country in Leavenworth, County KS. $100/month rent. Private room, incl. utilities. 1-913-773-8221 5312 Lofts For Lease MO - DOWNTOWN 816-421-4343 One-of-a-kind spaces in a variety of historic fully restored buildings throughout Downtown, Crossroads, Westside, and West Bottoms. Commercial, residential, office, loft, art studios, and live/work spaces.

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HOT PROPERTIES

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MO-DOWNTOWN $775-$950 816.421.5421 Best deal for cool downtown loft This building has it all: covered parking, w/d, granite, sun deck, huge windows, brick walls, views. 2 left. Call Brandon Now! 5315 Condos Duplexes & Townhomes MO-NKC $515 816-531-2555 512 E. 27th Ave., 1 bedroom duplex, appliances, garage

MO-SOUTH KC $425 816-756-2380 9515 Charlotte (Bannister area) MOVE IN SPECIAL!!! 2 BR, 1 BA Duplex. Hardwood/carpet, C/A.

MO- INDEPENDENCE 816-252-8990 Western Independence, One & Two bedroom apartments, new carpet, ceiling fans, central air, 5 minutes to downtown, 10 minutes to UMKC, great highway access. Call today 816-252-8990 KS-KANSAS CITY $350/MONTH 816-531-6817 Large 1 bedroom apartment near 10th & Grandview. Dining room, kitchen, appliances, ceiling fans, water paid. Application fee-credit app & deposit required.

MO-KANSAS CITY $650/MONTH 816-536-5902 Armour & Gilliam. Clean 1 br Loft Apt. In Historic Hyde Park Home. Hardwood Floors & Wall to Wall carpet. Modern Island w/ Tiled Kitchen. All Appliances Included. 10 New Windows to Brighton the Area. over 8' Ceilings. HEAT, WATER, TRASH & LAUNDRY FREE!!!! 1ST TIME ON MARKET IN 5 yrs. LOOK & COMPARE TO AREA.

DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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MO-HYDE PARK $299+ 816-960-4712 Clean, quite & safe. Historic Hyde Park Studios and 1 bedrooms. Walk to Westport. Cats welcome. Updated kitchens and baths. New carpet. Mention this ad for a $299 a month special Alps Apartments 816-960-4712 MO-KANSAS CITY STARTING AT $395 816-231-2874 Stonewall Court apartments-2500 Independence Ave. Central air, secure entry, on site laundry, on bus line, close to shopping. Nice apartments, Sec 8 welcome. $100 Deposit Office hours M-F 8-5

5317 Apartments For Rent

KS-KU MED $695/MONTH 913-671-8218 First mo rent free. 2 Bedroom, 2 Full Baths. 1200 S.F. Fully Equipped Kitchen. Huge Walk-In Closet. Gated Parking. Swimming Pool! Call Today!

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MO-GILLHAM PARK $495/MO 816-785-2875 RARE opportunity 1 unit vacancy. Beautiful Loft style Apartment on Gillham Park great views completely New everything. Exposed brick, marble floors, exposed ceilings (3rd floor units), hardwood floors, claw foot or jacuzzi tubs its all here right on Gillham Park with great sunset views. Completely new and updated with new Refrigerator, stove, Central air, furnace, garbage disposal, microwave/hood, maple cabinets and tons more. As low as $495/mo w/ lease. Big 1 bdrms in a great part of town. Onsite mgmt. Call Wes at 816-785-2875 or Dave at 913-244-4892

MO-KCAI $725 (816)756-2380 4124 Warwick Large 3 bedroom, large balcony, hardwood througout. www.KNAACKPROPERTIES.COM

KS-KCKS $425-$525 913-299-9748 HEAT & WATER PAID... NO GAS BILL!KCK25 ACRE SETTING WITH POOL 63rd & ANN, 5 minutes West of I-635 & I-70 One bedroom $425; Two bedroom $525. No pets please. You CANNOT BEAT this value! Don't miss out on this limited-time offer! Call NOW! MUCH NICER THAN THE PRICE!

MO-DOWNTOWN $610+ 816-471-2751 The Courthouse Lofts on Grand Boulevard offers the finest in affordable apartment living in a truly urban setting. A complete historic rehabilitation of the 1939 former Federal Courthouse creates 176 new apartment lofts in the heart of downtown KC. Heated underground parking - In-unit laundry and premium finishes - Affordable downtown living from $555/month **Income restrictions apply. Please call for details.

MO-KCAI $450 (816)756-2380 4130 Warwick. 1 bedroom apartment. www.KNAACKPROPERTIES.COM

MO-MIDTOWN $650 816-753-1923 Ask About Winter Move-In Special. 4440-4444 Jarboe, 2BR, 1BA apt available now! Amenities include pool, shared balconies, you pay electric utility only, and a nice West Plaza location. Also Studio available for $ 425.00. Call John A. Krugh Realty, LLC today for your appointment to view these units. MO-MIDTOWN $600 816-753-1923 Ask About Winter Move-in Special! 4630 Wornall, Monterey Apts, Third floor, 1BR, 1BA with a Plaza view. Amenties include secured entry, location right off of the Plaza, and a community patio. No pets & no smoking please! Also available is a 1st floor 1BR, 1BA, for $ 525. Call John A. Krugh Realty, LLC today to see these two units.

MO-MIDTOWN $375 - $475 816-560-0715 ARMOUR FLATS APARTMENTS - Studio & 1 bedrooms available in a newly remodeled building. Great location! Gas, water, trash paid. MO-MIDTOWN $595 (816)756-2380 4011 Warwick. Large 2 bedroom, central air, carpet, patio. KNAACKPROPERTIES.COM

KS-Overland Park $825 913-962-6683 Newly remodeled 2 bedroom house, walk-in closets, hardwood floors, garage, fenced yard, washer/dryer, appliances, pets welcome! rs-kc.com KC4FG

APTS/JOBS/STUFF

MO-MIDTOWN $415-$700 913-940-2047 Newly Renovated Studios,1 & 2 Bedrooms in convenient Midtown Location. Off Street Parking.

KS-Shawnee Area! $675 913-362-6683 Cute & cozy 2 bedroom house, light filled living room, basement, eat-in kitchen with all the appliances including dishwasher, deck for BBQ's, pets OK rs-kc.com KC4FF KS-Turner Area $750 913-962-6683 Nearly 1200 sq. ft. 3 bedroom house, newer carpet, spacious living room, safely fenced yard for pets and kids, appliances, pets OK! rs-kc.com KC4FE MO-75th & Wornall $750 816-254-7200 Character filled 2 bedroom house, plush carpet, dining & living room, safely fenced yard, appliances include dishwasher, pets OK! rs-kc.com KC4FA MO-KANSAS CITY $1200 816-254-7200 Huge 5 bed/2 bath house, hardwood floors, dining & living room, basement, fenced yard with a deck, appliances, plus NO application fee! rs-kc.com KC4E7 MO-SOUTH KANSAS CITY $645 816-761-2382 2 Bedroom, 2 bath house for rent. 7901 Oldham Rd. All appliances including W/D.

MO-MIDTOWN $425 (816)756-2380 712 E. Linwood. 1 bedroom apts. Carpet. New renovation. Walking distance to Costco, Home Depot, Martini Corner. Pets ok. www.KNAACKPROPERTIES.COM

FREE ONLINE CLASSIFIEDS FROM THE PITCH

MO-MIDTOWN $625 816-756-2380 4123 Walnut. Large 2 bedroom apartment. With Hardwoods. www.knaackproperties.com

MO-NKC $515 816-531-2555 319 E. 27th Ave. 1 bedroom, central air, appliances, garage.

MO-WALDO $850 816.531.2555 7247 Wyandotte, 3 bedroom, 2 bath, appliances, central air, basment, garage. MO-NE KC $400-$450 816-472-1866 Now renting 502-520 Maple Blvd. Colonial Court Apartments w/ air conditioners. Super move in special 1/2 off 1st month rent & $200 Deposit. For more details call Kelly James Onsite Manager (816)472-1866 Home (816) 777-6965 or the San Diego Branch Office is (619) 954-2703 MO-VALENTINE $400-$850 816-753-5576 CALL TODAY! Rent Studios, 1 & 2 BR Apartments & 3 Bedroom HOMES. Colliers International, EHO MO-WESTPORT/KUMED $695 816-531-3111 3942 Roanoke~ ground floor Duplex. 1 BR, lrg rooms, lots of closets. Off street parking, front porch. No pets please. MO-WESTPORT/PLAZA $500/MTH 816-561-9528 Winter Special- Large 2 Bedroom, Central Heat, Balcony, Private Parking, Garbage disposal. 3943 Roanoke and 3821 Central Call for details PUBLISHERâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S NOTICE: All real estate advertised herein is subject to Federal Fair Housing Act, which makes it illegal to adverise, â&#x20AC;&#x153;any preferences, limitation, or discrimination because of race, color, religion, sex, handicap, familial status, or national origin, or intention to make any such preference, limitation, or dicriminaiton. We will not knowing accept any advertising for real estate which is in violation of the law. All persons are hereby informed that all dwellings advertised are available on a equal opportunity basis.

MO-Waldo Area $750 913-962-6683 Spacious 2 bedroom house, warm and toasty fireplace, garage, fenced yard, appliances including W/D, pets OK, 1st months rent half off! rs-kc.com KC4FB MO-Westport Area $700 816-254-7200 Walk dining and entertainment from this 2 bedroom house, living room, full basement, fenced yard, appliances, pets welcome! rs-kc.com KC4E8KS-Shawnee Near Westwood Park $875 913-962-6683 Sleek and sharp house with 2 bedrooms, formal dining area for entertaining, loaded with kitchen appliances, pets OK! rs-kc.com KC4E9 5367 Office Space For Rent MO - DOWNTOWN 816-421-4343 One-of-a-kind spaces in a variety of historic fully restored buildings throughout Downtown, Crossroads, Westside, and West Bottoms. Commercial, residential, office, loft, art studios, and live/work spaces.

5320 Houses For Rent KS-KANSAS CITY $420/MONTH 816-531-6817 Charming 1 bedroom house near 7th & Central. Dining room, kitchen with new floor, refrigerator, ceiling fans, sun porch, full basement with w/d hook-ups, front porch & fenced yard. Credit app-application fee & deposit required. KS-KCK/Rosedale Area $800 816-254-7200 Huge feeling 4 bed/2 bath house, bright and open walkout finished basement, living room, deck for BBQ's, appliances, pets OK! rs-kc.com KC4FD KS-KU Med Area $675 913-962-6683 Spacious and open 2 bedroom house, inviting living room, full basement, garage, loaded with appliances including W/D, bring the pets! rs-kc.com KC4FC

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* DWI * * CRIMINAL * * TRAFFIC *

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Practice emphasizing DWI defense. Experienced, knowledgeable attorney will take the time to listen and inform. Free initial phone consultation.

CASH PAID FOR JUNK/UNWANTED VEHICHLES. Call J.G.S. Auto Wrecking For Quote. 913-321-2716 ot Toll free 1-877-320-2716

THE LAW OFFICE OF DENISE KIRBY 816-221-3691

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2 yr. Certificate Program. Call For Winter Enrollment! Classes Begin January For info. & Tour Call BRC Audio 913-621-2300 or visit www.recordingeducation.com

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Real Estate & Bankruptcy Reasonable rates! Evening & Weekend appt. Susan Bratcher 816-453-2240 www.bratcherlaw.biz

Auto Insurance Starting @ $40.00

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99.7% Toxin Free w/n an hour We can help you pass Coopers 3617 Broadway, KCMO 816.931.7222

Simple, Uncontested + Filing Fee. Don Davis. 816-531-1330

CLUBEROTICAKC.COM #1 Lifestyle House Party DON'T MISS OUR XXXmas PARTY Friday 12-23 Saturday 12-24 & News Years Eve Pajama Party PARTY WITH POKER IN HIS LIMO 913-238-4339 ( Roomate wanted )

6101 E. 87th St./Hillcrest Rd. ,HBO,Phone, Banq. Hall $39.95 Day/ $159 Week/ $499 Month + Tax

Affordable Family Law Attorney

No Exp. needed/ Training Provided/ Opportunity to Advance to MGMT. Submit Resume at www.mp-inc.org under contact us or call 816-912-2890 - MP Incorporated

CASH FOR CARS Wanted/Unwanted Autos, Wrecked, Damaged or Broken. Cash Paid. www.abcautorecycling.com 913-271-9406

A-1 Motel 816-765-6300 Capital Inn 816-765-4331

$$ Paying Top Dollar $$ For Junk Cars & Trucks Missouri: 816-241-7548 Kansas: 913-321-1000

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DECEMBER 22-28, 2011

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DOWNTOWN AREA STUDIO APT $110/WEEK Min.

$100 Deposit, All Utilities Paid, Laundry Facilities. On Metro Bus Line as of 10/3/11. Holiday Apts, 115 W. Harlem Rd, KCMO 816-221-1721 Se Hable Espanol

Marriage & Family Visas Green Cards/Work Permits

Free consultations-Law Office of Joseph W. Alfred 913-538-6720 www.lojwa.com

CAREER EDUCATION LEARN BARTENDING!!

Big fun, Big money, Two week program-Job placement assistance FT, PT, Parties, Weddings, Always in demand! International School of Professional Bartending. Call 816-753-3900 TODAY !!!

* RECORDING ENGINEER/PRODUCER*

2 yr. Certificate Program. Call For Winter Enrollment! Classes Begin January For info. & Tour Call BRC Audio 913-621-2300 or visit www.recordingeducation.com

Affordable Family Law Attorney 816-842-6700. Divorce, Child Custody and

Support, Paternity. KS & MO. The choice of a lawyer is important and should not be based soley upon advertisements.

HOME Sellers & Tired Rental Property Owners

I have pre-qualified buyers for your property. We guarantee your payment. Our lease purchase program is the sales solution for your property. 816-853-8369

Electric Service Upgrade www.sjelectricalcontractorsllc.com Call Steve 816-217-9448