I said so

In this issue of Society Life’s Mom’s column, we asked local nonprofit executive and former teacher Trasa Cobern to answer 20 questions about her experiences both in becoming and being a mom.

Trasa has four children: Brady 24, Caden 22, Jaxon 20 and McCrae 18. Trasa lives with her husband, Kyle, and several of the boys in Hurst. She’s also the daughter of America’s favorite “Uncle Si” from Duck Dynasty, and his wife of 52 years, Christine. Here’s what she had to say…

SOCIETY LIFE: What’s one of your earliest memories you have of your Mom? TRASA COBERN: One of my earliest memories with my mom is sitting at the foot of her sewing desk. She would be creating beautiful clothing for herself, or for me or my brother, moving her foot rhythmically on the foot pedal while the sewing machine whirred away. I loved hearing that sound— my mom was in her happy place then. Unfortunately, she suffered a spinal issue in her neck that makes her unable to sew that way anymore, which is a shame. She was an artist and made such beautiful things. Most of my formal dresses were by her design.

SL: What is something you thought about Motherhood that was totally wrong? TC: I thought Motherhood kind of ended when the kids went to college–whew, was I wrong! Parenting adults is not for the faint of heart, and rivals the time when they were toddlers for worry and stress! I both love and hate Life 360, because I can know where they are when they are traveling, but that strangely makes me worry more. I know my parents sent me off to college at 17, and they lived four states away! We only talked on the phone once a week because long distance phone calls were so expensive! It’s such a different world now.

SL:What’s something you wanted to do but didn’t... and why didn’t you? TC: I always wanted to be a lawyer. I chose to skip law school because I had my first son and wanted to be around for all the child things… new teeth, walking, talking, etc. I decided to become a stay at home mom, and I did that for 12 years. I don’t regret that investment at all!

SL:Was there something your Mom did when you were a kid that you swore you’d never do as a parent? TC: I swore I would never embarrass my kids in front of others, as my parents always liked to tell “funny” stories about me. Now, as an adult, I realize they never meant to embarrass me, but were sharing fond memories of me. It was my perception that made it embarrassing. I’m positive I embarrass my kids now!

SL:What did you think you wanted to be when you grew up? TC: I thought I wanted to be a judge, maybe even a Supreme Court Justice. But life took a different path, and I became a stay-at-home mom, then a teacher, and now fundraise for a wonderful local Christian nonprofit— 6 Stones. I love my life and wouldn’t change the winding path I’ve taken.

SL: How have your notions of what it means to be a Mom changed over your lifetime? TC: Over my lifetime, my notion of being a mom has changed a lot. I thought of myself more as a supervisor at the beginning, like I needed to watch them constantly. That morphed into being their first teacher for them to learn life lessons, and now that’s changed to being almost a friend, sometimes a confidant, and always their cheerleader!

SL: What’s the best family vacation you’ve ever taken? TC: It was our trip to Alaska several years ago. We love the outdoors and spending time together. It was so fun to whitewater raft, view mountains, and enjoy the 70 degree temperatures in June!

SL: Is there a moment or event that radically changed the way you saw Motherhood? TC: I went to a law school scholarship interview when my firstborn was six months old. I was gone all weekend, and when I returned home, Brady had gotten his first tooth. I bawled like a baby, because I’d missed it. Suffice to say, I chose not to attend law school. I wanted to be completely present as a mother, so I chose to stay at home and have more children.

SL: When did you know you were ready to have kids? TC: I knew I was ready to have kids when I no longer felt like a kid myself. When I was paying bills, buying cars and working full time, it felt natural to move into the next phase of our marriage.

SL: What’s your favorite photo of your family or kids? TC: My favorite photo of my family is from years ago, when my oldest was in 6th grade. My father in law and my husband coached a youth football team, the Giants, for many years, even before we had kids. When Brady was old enough to play for his dad and grandpa, we did a photo shoot with the entire family—all of us along