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VOLUME XLIV ISSUE 24 MARCH 28, 2014 THE FACULTY ISSUE

! MOTHER DON’T CRY !

Мамо, не плач. Я повернусь весною.

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Мother, don't cry. I'll return in the Spring. У шибку пташинкою вдарюсь твою. I'll bump into your pane like a bird; Прийду на світанні в садок із росою, I'll settle in the garden with the morning dew. А, може, дощем на поріг упаду. Or perhaps I'll fall on your doorstep with the rain.

Голубко, не плач. My dove, don't cry. It was fate, mother, That the word "Grandmother" won't now be yours. Так судилося, ненько, I'll come and softly enter your dreams, Вже слово, матусю, не буде моїм. And speak to you of my new home. Прийду і попрошуся в сон твій тихенько

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An angel sings me a lullaby, My deadly wound no longer hurts. You know, mother, here too there is sadness; My soul aches for you, my love.

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Dearest Mother, forgive me your black scarf, And that you'll be alone from now on. I loved you. And I loved Ukraine. She, like you, was my only one.

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Oksana Maksymyshyn-Korabel

THE

Розкажу,

як мається в домі новім.

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Мені колискову ангел співає I рана смертельна уже не болить. Ти знаєш, матусю, й тут сумно буває Душа за тобою, рідненька, щемить.

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Мамочко, вибач за чорну хустину За те, що віднині будеш сама. Тебе я люблю. I люблю Україну Вона, як і ти, була в мене одна.

RECORD


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! THE RECORD Chi, Chi, Chi. Le, Le, Le. ÂĄVamos Chile! VOLUME XLIV ISSUE 24 MARCH 28, 2014 Editor In Chief Andrew Cammon ‘14 Layout Editor Lucas McGartland ‘14 Content Editors Michael Herman ‘14 William O’Brien ‘14 Eric Stange ‘14 Faculty Moderator Ms. Layton

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Contact theprioryrecord@gmail.com 314.434.3690 ext. 221

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By Mr. O’Connell

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People have inhabited Chile for over 12,000 years. Then, in 1818, Bernie O’Higgins, a Chilean with Irish blood, guts and otherworldly sideburns (see picture below) and his compadres defeated the mighty, but rather annoying Spaniards and won his colony’s independence. Immediately, the new nation set about re-inventing itself. Like all people of European descent, they shoved the natives (the Mapuche people) onto “reduccionesâ€? (reservations) where they have lived in grinding poverty ever since. But, those who live in glass houses‌then they whipped up a new national dish, the Chilean empanada before sitting down and writing the longest national anthem on earth. Chi, chi, chi, le, le, le, dulce patria etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. Several other things happened over the next few weeks

like the invention of Chilean sea bass, the adoption of an impossibly difficult accent, and the planting of grape vines. Somehow they still found time to sew themselves a very handsome national flag that, three centuries later, was totally ripped off by the upstart Texans. Chile has given us the poetry of Neruda, most of the fruit we eat in winter, most of the copper we’ve ever used, the most uplifting mining rescue story of modern times and, as if that weren’t enough, Tutoria. There’s something else you should know about Chile. It has one of the highest percentages of warm-hearted, fun-loving, rootin’-tootin’, hyphenusing people in the western hemisphere if not the entire galaxy. A n y h o w, t w o m o r e Chileans (undoubtedly as great as the two seùores pictured here) will be coming to Priory

in the fall. They will be either Freshmen or Sophomores. The final selection has not yet been made. Nevertheless, they will need families. Maybe you’ve always wanted to have a Chilean of your own. Now’s your chance! Please talk over the idea of hosting one of them with your folks. Mr. O’Connell can give you more information about this program. He’ll also put you in touch with previous host families so you can get their feedback too. koconnell@priory.org; 314-434-3690, ext. 122.

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The Record Disclaimer

The Record is the official student publication of Saint Louis Priory School in St. Louis, Missouri. It is produced by students/staff members. Its purpose is to inform students of events in the community; to encourage discussion of local, national, and international issues; and to serve as a training ground for budding journalists, photographers, and graphic designers. The Record accepts contributions from all members of the Priory community, including students, faculty, and alumni. The Record will not publish content considered legally unprotected speech, including but not limited to: libel, copyright infringement, unwarranted invasion of privacy, or material disruption of the educational process. Student editors apply professional standards to the production of the newspaper and are solely responsible for all content, both explicit and implicit. Letters to the Editors are always appreciated. Feedback not intended for publication is also welcome.

A Guide to the Emoji By Steve Oslica

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After learning that Mrs. Zlatic was writing an article about iPhone skills, I knew I couldn’t let that pass without imparting some other wisdom that I’m sure some, if not most, of you are already familiar with — using the emoji. Is there a better way to express yourself and your feelings than with a tiny picture? Yes, and that’s to use more than one tiny picture. Some of my favorite emojis:

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! — The American Flag emoji can mean a lot of things. It can be straightforward and mean, “I love America.� It can

serve as a reply and mean,“That thing you just said is as awesome as loving America.â€? It can mean supporting the troops, expressing American exceptionalism, etc. Clearly context is important. đ&#x;‘? — The thumbs-up emoji is another all-purpose character. Think of any situation in which you would give a person an actual, physical thumbs-up in response to their thoughts or actions. Those are easily translatable into situations when using this emoji is appropriate. It’s like having a Facebook “likeâ€? button in any situation. đ&#x;?ş — Animal emojis come in handy in a diverse set of situa-

Teacher Sayings:

tions as well. There is an elephant and a donkey, so combine that with the American Flag emoji and you’ve got a political statement. I’ve used the tiger emoji to represent Truman on Mizzou gamedays before. The possibilities are endless. Missing from the emoji library: A taco — There are a lot of ethnic food emojis, and this seems to be a gross oversight. Tacos are awesome, and there is no way to express that through this important communications medium. ‌continued on p. 5‌


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! Six Thoughts On Six Years From An English Teacher By Mr. Nickolai ‘03 I am not an advice expert. Do not read this article if you are hoping for some sort of enlightenment about life or if you want to know the key to succeeding at Priory. When most of you think about your future, you probably think about graduating from Priory and eventually making your way in the world. Therefore it would seem silly to take advice from someone who ended up right back in the place that you are planning on leaving behind you. However, I have roamed the same halls and sat in the same desks. I have even been yelled at by some of the same teachers. And, yes, to this day I’m still a little scared when I get called into Mr. Finan’s office. I like to think that you, Priory student reading this article, and I have a shared experience. Therefore it seems appropriate to tell you my thoughts about my years at Priory as a student. There’s nothing profound, but I hope that these words will help you be a little happier and healthier as you make your way toward graduation. 7th Grade: Be yourself! It is great to be a 7th grader at Priory. You get to make new friends and meet people who don’t know you, and therefore you have an opportunity to be who you want to be. Try everything that interests you until you find friends and activities that make you happy. Don’t worry about what the older boys think. No one is cool when he is in 7th grade, and it’s a wonderful thing. You can’t possibly be cool so you might as well be yourself. Show a senior his 7th grade picture and ask him what he thinks. He will probably say something along the lines of “I was so dorky!” or “My haircut looks so

stupid!” If you can track down a yearbook from 1998, you will find a picture of me “dancing” at a junior school mixer. The gym is mostly empty, and I am wearing a Cardinals T-shirt that goes down to my knees, (very stylish back then). The picture used to embarrass me, but now it makes me smile. I was so wonderfully naïve. 8th Grade: Slow down. So you are no longer the smallest fish in the pond. There’s a new batch of naïve 7th graders in the junior school, and so that makes you an adult, right? Not quite. Celebrate that fact. You will have plenty of time to be a mature adult. Your days of XPeriod wall ball and advisory football are limited, (unless you come back and teach). Next year you can spend X-period sitting around the high school in a catatonic state while you stare at your cell phone. This year you should get outside and play like a kid. Two years ago I was sitting in Room 7 during XPeriod. A few of the current sophomores were outside the window, and they were tackling the ever-living snot out of one another and then giggling like mad men. As a teacher, I should have stopped them. However as an alumnus who knew what was ahead of them, I decided to let them have their fun while they still knew how. 9th Grade: “Disconnect to connect.” That is a phrase that I learned in Chile in the summer of 2012. I was living in a house with several oblates, and there were moments when they made a point to “disconnect to connect.” In these moments, they would put away the cellphones and the computers so that they could disconnect from the digital world. Once they disconnected from their devices, they were able to connect with one another through conversation,

prayer, and laughter. When I monitor the halls at X-Period and look down and see 80% of the freshmen playing games on their phones, the words of the oblates echo in my head, “Disconnect to connect!” Cell phones were fairly rare at Priory during my freshman year, and iPhones didn’t even exist. I was pretty disconnected from the digital world in those days, and I spent my free time chatting with friends and horsing around. However, the connections I made with my friends during those free moments have lasted to this day. 10th Grade: Buckle up. Take these words literally. It is not a metaphor. When I was a sophomore, each week I experienced new levels of freedom as more of my friends got their licenses. It was an exciting time, and I really enjoyed riding around town in my friends’ cars. With two weeks left in my sophomore year, I went out with some friends on a Friday night. Like any group of 16year-olds, we felt fairly invincible as we sped down the highway with the music blasting. That night was the last time I felt that invincibility. My friend lost control of the car, and it slammed into the median before it flipped onto its roof. I broke my neck and busted my knee. The other guys in the car were injured as well. However, we all were wearing our seatbelts, and we all survived. I would not be alive today if not for that decision to buckle up. I am not invincible. You are not invincible. Buckle up. 11th Grade: Get some sleep. In the fall term of my junior year I remember feeling pretty overwhelmed and exhausted. Each day when I arrived home after soccer, I would eat dinner and then fall asleep before 8:00. Initially I

Quintessential Roy Halladay fastball

tried to fight through the drowsiness that came at 8:00, but it was very difficult to do solid work when I was so tired. Finally after about 3 weeks of battling, I decided that I would surrender to sleep at 8:00, then wake up around 2:00 a.m. and do homework until 4 or 5. Then I would go back to sleep until 6:30. Needless to say, it was a strange year. However, the odd schedule seemed to work for me. I was sharper after getting some sleep, and I felt better when I didn’t have to fight it off. I’m not trying to tell you juniors to adopt this schedule, but I think that you could benefit from the reasoning behind it. No matter how stressful and overwhelming things may get at the end of the year, you need to listen to your body and stay healthy. Take breaks when you need them. Eat when you need to eat. Sleep when you need to sleep. 12th Grade: Get involved and enjoy every minute. Senior year is a fun and rewarding year, and I have not experienced anything like it since I graduated from Priory. You seniors are now a group of men that have been through 5+ challenging years that have transformed you from 7th grade boys to men. You are profoundly connected to one another. You will not experience that kind of brotherhood again in your life. Enjoy your time together in these last few months. Get as involved in the school as you can. You are the big fish in the little pond! Take advantage of every opportunity to be a leader in the school. Fill that free time with experiences that you will remember. Next year you will leave Priory behind and have to reestablish your status at a new institution, but for now you are on top. Enjoy it!


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PUZZLE S

! Easy, Medium, and Hard Sudokus:

Crossword Puzzle ACROSS 1. Theory that answers the question "What's the matter?"? 8. Odd 15. Crescent-shaped opening 16. Opine 17. Add bit by bit 18. Crusade 19. "Misery" Oscar winner 20. Bone marrow lymphocyte 22. Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Working for __" 23. "What __ state of affairs!" 24. Nice pen 25. 1970 A.L. MVP Powell 26. Pester 27. More than lift

28. Air ending 29. Odd 31. Grand array, maybe 32. Inexpensive way to travel 34. Female Indy racer __ Patrick 37. Secures, in a way 41. Radarange maker 42. They're tender 43. Prefix with angular 44. With 36-Down, 1925 Broadway hit 45. Lots 46. "__ '70s Show" 47. Sr.'s hurdle 48. It has regular drawings 49. "The results __" 50. Some cosmetics 52. German narrative genre

54. "CHiPs" star 55. Philippines city 56. Fails to 57. Landlords DOWN 1. Storied woodcutter 2. Deli order 3. Performing 4. Distributed, with "out" 5. "No kidding?" 6. 2004 N.L. champs 7. His epitaph reads, "That's all, folks!" 8. Plot 9. Oar's fulcrum 10. Stream 11. Poet Lowell 12. Dark phase 13. 2005 Kentucky Derby winner 14. Causes to explode

21. Ruthless 24. Montana motto word 25. "... among thy green __": Burns 27. Writer Jong 28. Some retaining walls 30. One might be charging 31. Singing voice, informally 33. Like pituitary gland functions 34. Hung loosely 35. Spanish sherry 36. See 44-Across 38. "I kissed thee ere I killed thee" speaker 39. Not so hardy 40. Exercise goal 42. Attacks 45. Lively movement 46. Palms, e.g.

Loneliness and Solitude By Fr. Dominic, OSB

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Languishing in a sea of despair Only myself do I view in the mirror Nothing to entice me out of this place Excluded I feel from the whole human race Lost in the darkness of the unknown

Isolated even from the possessions I own Neglected by those who called themselves friend Empty of feeling for the property I tend Slighted by egos much bigger than I Secluded, alone, I just want to die Self-confident within a world full of light

Plug and Chug

Open to the wonder of each new sight Lucky to be living in this present age Inspired by the gifts of each life-stage Tuned in to the quiet of each new dawn Understanding that sometimes we must move on Devoted to God in prayer and thanksgiving Encouraged by Love to go right on living


TEC H

5

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The Art of Phonography By Mrs. Zlatic

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The best camera is the one you’ve got with you. For most of us, even those of us who have invested in big DSLRs and lenses, this means taking photographs with our cell phones. It’s pretty rare that we don’t have our phones with us.

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Thankfully, the lenses and sensors in today’s cell phones are great, and with a variety of fun apps the possibilities for creativity are endless. To capture special family moments, stunning sunsets, and the beauty found in our everyday world, just pull out your cell phone. Here are a few apps I like to use:

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Instagram: the original go-to

app for applying filters and sharing with friends and family. Regular updates keep improving this solid app, so be sure to stay current.

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PicTapGo: the ability to layer and scale filters, kind of like an uber-Instagram. You can also save your favorite, custom layers to use again.

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PS Express: a greatly scaleddown version of Photoshop for your phone that offers more control beyond your native software.

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Camera+: advanced creative control when shooting your image, beyond the standard camera software that comes on your phone. It also has a timer so you can include yourself in your photographs without the dreaded selfie-arm.

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Diptic: Make montages of multiple images, and play with borders and frames.

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Fuzel: More montages. Typic: Easily add text to your photos. CamWow: Fun distortion filters that allow you to make your subject (or yourself) a blockhead, a pinhead, or any number of alien-like beings. Little kids love this one.

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FatBooth: Pretty much what you’d expect. Make people fat. Or fatter. I once used FatBooth on my cat. Tiny Planet Photos: two filters, one eponymous and one called “Rabbit Hole,” turn your photos into a different universe by warping them into circular con-

structions.

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It’s easy to get your pictures off your phone and into your hands, too. There are a variety of printing apps that allow you to upload your photos to a service that will then mail your prints (my favorite is PostalPix), and even Walgreens offers easy print-from-phone options for snapshots, photo collages, posters and canvas.

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Most of these apps allow for instant sharing on Facebook, Twitter and other sites. Start snapping and sharing!

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The Communications Team at Priory has an Instagram feed. Check it out at instagram.com/ stlprioryschool.

A Guide to the Emoji, continued …continued from p. 2… A waffle — In a time when Taco Bell breakfast is about to revolutionize society there’s no way to use emojis to represent a waffle taco because there is neither a waffle nor a taco. A Canadian Flag — During the Olympics, there were times when I wished to express solidarity with our North American brethren, but there was no Canadian Flag emoji with which to do so. There’s a

maple leaf, but no moose to put with it. The emoji people need to up their game in regards to Canada. Emoji pro-tips: Combining emojis — A good emoji combination can express a powerful message, but a bad combination will just lead to confusion. Cross-platform understanding — You can use emojis in your tweets, Facebook

Alright (etc.)

statuses and Instagram captions, but remember that they only show up consistently when people view them on a mobile device or tablet. Not all computers have that capability. Priory e-mail — If you’re getting your Priory e-mail through Outlook, the webapp does not support emojis but the regular desktop application does. Of course, if you’re using your mobile devices for your e-mail, they work on those as well.


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! March Madness Wisdom Dr. G’s ! By Dr. Griesbauer I wanted to make this article my NCAA basketball picks and Farewell Address all in one. I had contacted Warren Buffet about a buyout when it becomes obvious I am going to win the billion dollars. But alas I still do not have a cell phone and cannot submit my picks for the billion. So the prognostications that I will now present will only be for entertainment purposes and I will be teaching your grandsons at Priory someday. Please remember that I have been doing this for more years than most of the readers of this have been alive. Not that I have won anything by doing so but I have probability on my side this time. I can also assure you that I filled out my bracket and wrote this article long before the true start of the tournament last Thursday morning. (The “First Four” are still playin games in my book and do not count as “tournament” wins despite what Cal Poly may say.) So let’s take a look at the Sweet Sixteen one region at a time.

Midwest Region. Wichita State looks like they playing with a mission and have two players, Van Vleet and Early, who can make things happen against anyone. Louisville has enough returning talent and a weak enough path, regardless of how much I would like SLU to be a national program, that they will get a chance to stop Wichita State. Jabari Parker and his friends at Duke should have enough talent to their first two games and will only be tested by Michigan. Michigan will make a good run but will not play enough consistent defense to advance beyond the Sweet Sixteen. I would like to see Wichita State make the Final Four and I am picking them to reach the championship game. West Region. Oklahoma State has one of my favorite players to watch when he is on—Marcus Smart. I think he can dominate games and will carry the Cowboys to the Elite Eight. Losing to Oklahoma State will end a once-in-a-couple-of-lifetimes run for North Dakota State. The Bison have seniors and scoring ability. Creighton has an easy path until they play

Wisconsin. Doug McDermott can score enough to overcome his team’s many weaknesses. Wisconsin seems to have made a significant adjustment in their approach. Their new found pace and scoring should get them past Oregon to have a matchup with Dougie . I think that matchup favors Creighton and a historic run to the Final Four for the Bluejays. South Region. Florida is the tournament favorite and in an odd manner this seems appropriate. They are a major program without a star or obvious NBA draft pick. Their key players only became key players as seniors. While I see them making the Final Four I think their lack of star power will ultimately lead to their end. If I win the family pool this pick will put me over the top— Stephen F. Austin. They have good guard play and can use momentum to beat get by inconsistent UCLA. If Syracuse can recover their early season form they should be able to cruise until their game with Florida when their season ends. And since I am out on the limb pretty far with S. F. Austin, why

Parenthood

Evolution

By Mr. Mohrmann

By Mr. (Jake) Wenger

My 18-speed touring bike, old and worn, Hangs upside down in our messy garage, Where a pair of robins darts in and out Trying their best, with starts and stops, to Build a nest between pedal and sprocket On the underside of the dusty frame I haven’t been on since my children were born.

“Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes Turn and face the strain”

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not take another huge gamble with the biggest disappointment from last year. I think New Mexico will have enough size to win two games. East Region. I did not realize until reviewing my brackets for writing this that I have chosen the top four seeds in this region: Virginia, Michigan State, Iowa State and Villanova. That should get me some points in the pool. Despite the POTUS and most everyone else picking Michigan State to win the tournament, I am picking my national champion from this region but it will be Iowa State. Iowa State has a unique collection of talents and seems to play at a new level in the tournament. DeAndre Kane is perhaps the most interesting player to watch in the entire tournament. The only negative for Iowa State is their school colors. Only Albany has worse uniforms in the tournament. Iowa State over Wichita State 80-68. Enjoy the tournament and remember 1-800-BETSOFF.

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Rotary phone, push button phone, cell phone Flexible bones, strong bones, achin’ bones

Prokaryotic, Eukaryotic, Homo sapiens Extant, Extinct

Letter writing, e-mails- texting Pollution, habitat destruction, climate changing Son, Father, Grandfather

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Ok Gents

Learning, teaching, can’t be bothered Observing, doing, remembering Training, working, retiring

“Then you better start swimmin' Or you'll sink like a stone For the times they are a-changin'”

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MUSIC A Treatise on Riff-Appreciation By Mr. Orlando ‘99 Priory, by my estimation, has always had a difficult time embracing the riff. Rap? We’ve got it covered. 50’s doo-wop? All over that. Hipster “rootsrock”? Someone somewhere is drinking a Starbucks Mochachinofrappato quoting a Pitchfork review and feeling far superior to someone else who cannot quote the same quote. The poor riff, full of crunchy ear-splitting decibels, sits waiting to be recognized and few take notice…but not in this issue. I adore the riff and would like to review some albums where the riff, not the solo, is king. (These are not new albums but they are definitely worth a once-over).

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Fu Manchu – King of the Road (1999) The late 90s and early 2000s saw many bands cropping up on small indie labels giving nods back to early 70s rock – psychedelia, super-fuzzy guitar and bass tones, solos that had groove and swing (less technical, more feel), and vocalists as band members (not focal points) became prominent. Fu Manchu’s King of the Road is a gold-mine of heavy, fuzzy, sun-kissed riffs drizzled with lyrics about fast cars, motorcycles, skateboarding, and strange trips to all corners of the universe. Based out of Orange County, California, Fu Manchu is all about good times and head-nodding riffs; cool fact: Brant Bjork (drummer) originally formed Kyuss with one Josh Homme of Queens of the Stone Age (QOTSA). However unlike QOTSA, Fu Manchu is less about experimental sounds and

more about straight-up rock and roll (think Jimi Hendrix, Nazareth, Pat Travers Band, Robin Trower, UFO, Frank Marino and the Mahogany Rush, and early Ted Nugent). The bass is fuzzy and distorted, the drums have tremendous swagger, the guitars groan, drone, crunch, and sputter like motors, and Scott Hill sounds like the dude at the end of your street who fixes up his car for drag racing or shows downtown at the convention center. And the solos…Scott Hill and Bob Balch don’t showboat and play all the notes, they only play the ones that matter. Throw in loads of distortion, phasers, a bit of echo here and there, and suddenly a-la-Deep Purple, you’re Space Truckin’. This music is fun; considering how incredibly dark the midto late-90s got with the Seattle scene, it felt good to smile whilst enjoying some riffage. Standout tracks: the whole album. Play this on a good stereo. Loud. Devin Townsend Project – Epicloud (2012) Devin’s Townsend’s resume is massive and I don’t have enough room to begin to cover it. The bottom line: he’s proudly Canadian, he first gained prominence as the lead singer for Steve Vai’s (ex-Frank Zappa and overall guitar wizard) solo band, and he has put out an astonishing amount of work over the last decade and a half across all genres. Epicloud finds Devin pairing up with Dutch vocalist Anneke van Giersbergen (ex-The Gathering)

to produce what amounts to the heaviest pop album ever laid to tape. Don’t think Metallica machine-gun riffing; think Sarah McLachlan in a musical with a choir, double-bass drums, fiery riffs, and a wall-ofsound production (Devin’s trademark). Stylistically, the album is all over the map but all the songs carry strong, welldefined structures. Ballads (Where We Belong, Divine, Angel), mid-tempo rock (True North, Save Our Now, Hold On), instrumentals (Lessons), and metal (Liberation, Kingdom, Grace, More!) all make an appearance with plenty key changes and subtleties within the songs themselves to keep things interesting. The album isn’t just sonically heavy – the attention to harmonies and melody and the vocalist’s conviction in the delivery of the lyrics; all the details put together make this an emotionally draining undertaking. Anneke’s voice alone makes this album worth the sticker price; do yourself a favor and look into her solo projects and her work with The Gathering. To fully appreciate this album, listen to it at least once all the way through; no skipping. Epicloud is loud, lovely, beautiful, and crushing. Apocalyptica – Cult (2000) If you’ve never heard or seen Apocalyptica, they are certainly one of the more unique metal acts in existence. Quick facts: the whole band is Finnish, they started off as a Metallica tribute band, and they are all cellists (drums are provided by the band or guests who come in for sessions). Cult is their third studio album …continued on p. 8…

Who’s Terry?

7 Pluto’s Lament By Dr. Logusch

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(Sung to the tune of “Jesus loves the little children”) There once was a planet named Pluto, Whose status seemed free of a veto, ’Til astronomers were gathered, And over trifles grew lathered, Now Pluto has lost its ninth seat—Oh! We love all the little planets, All the planets of the sun. Some are smooth and rocky stones, Some are little icy balls— We love all the little planets of the sun! We love all the little planets, All the planets of the sun. Oh they say that Pluto ain’t, ’Cause it is so very faint— We do love this little planet of the sun! We love all the little planets, All the planets of the sun. Oh the Kuiper Belt they’ve searched: Pluto’s honor is besmirched— We do love this little planet of the sun! We love all the little planets, All the planets of the sun. Oh astronomers said no, Pluto out the door must go — We do love this little planet of the sun! We all love this little planet, This little planet of the sun. Oh now Pluto still should be, ’Cause it’s there for you and me— We do love this little planet of the sun!

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E NTE R TAINME NT

Priory In Space: Ender’s Game By Fr. Francis, OSB

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As a monk, I frequently think about the future of the school. What will Priory be like in a hundred or two hundred years? I pray it will still be a source of Catholic teaching, quality education and bastion for future geeks. Recently, I saw a movie called Ender’s Game and in many ways I think it could be re-titled: Priory In Space. The movie starts with a bunch of boys playing video games and thinking them very important, which is what takes place in most of Priory’s hallways in the morning, during X periods and after school. Then the boys get into a fight that pretty much positing for authority and the biggest nerd ends up winning. This is what happens in the JR School. That student goes home to an ultramodern home full of anxiety about school but really

had done excellently so he gets to advance to the next level, the high school. There, he learns to share with other geeks and becomes a geek-leader. He then meets a girl he likes and proves his affections for her by letting her tell him what to do. Here, in High School, the boy splits most of his time between classes and athletics, both of which are ext r e m e l y a dvanced, weird, and challenging which leads to a huge examination that keeps him up many nights with anxiety. Of course he attains the highest possible score on that test (this is euphemism for what otherwise would be a huge spoiler) but isn’t happy with his results. He then runs off in a truly Priory fashion

Calendar which involves a bizarre combination of leg and arm dis-coordination that is made even more painful to watch because his girlfriend is running much more deftly behind him. Having completed his studies, he then leaves the school and make the world a much more just place. The only thing that Priory in Space/Ender’s Game was missing was the monks and our spirituality, but I guess that is because Hollywood lacks the technology and screenplay writing skills to make a space movie that would be cool enough to portray us OSB’s in space, but the movie does give an interesting portrayal of what an excellent school without a moral compass is capable of doing.

A Treatise on Riff-Appreciation, continued …continued from p. 7…and is the first to make the band’s original songs the main focus – the previous two efforts (Plays Metallica By Four Cellos, 1996; Inquisition Symphony 1998) were cover albums with the latter featuring only three original tracks. On Cult, Apocalyptica continue to prove that cellos can write riffs just as well as guitars; and that vocalists are overrated and unnecessary, especially when the music is well-crafted. The album unfolds like a story – the opening track Path starts with gently picked, rhythmic strings that call to mind someone walking through the woods while in the background the other three cellos start to crescendo into a melodic wail, as if sending a

warning; then danger hits and the listener is assaulted with thrashtasic cello riffing. All four members of the band are classically trained so there is nothing atonal about the sound (even in those thrashtastic moments…yeah…I said it twice) – it literally comes across as classical music performing heavy metal music. As different as those styles are, the resulting arrangements are wonderfully complimentary – Cult sees Apocalyptica finding their own sound and broadening the scope of both genres. To my (untrained) ears, the notes are crisp and they lock in perfectly when providing harmonies and counter melodies. The predominant style on the album is thrash metal with tempo, differ-

ent keys, distortion (more so on this album than the previous two), and solos providing the variety. The first half of the album pummels with fast and heavy tracks (Path, Struggle, Pray!, and the insane Hyperventilation) while the second half provides some beautifully constructed ballads (Romance, Beyond Time, and Hope). Frankly, Romance alone is worth the sticker price – it’s dramatic, lush, complicated, and dark; in other words, it’s perfect. Throw in a thrashy Grieg cover (Hall of the Mountain King) and a couple of Metallica gems (Until It Sleeps and the far-superior Fight Fire With Fire), and you have 52:47 minutes of truly unique music.

Cover Poem Translated By Dr. Logusch

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Friday, March 7 4:15 JV Baseball vs. Whitefield Saturday, March 8 1:00PM V Baseball vs. Cooter 3:00PM V Baseball vs. Notre Dame

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Sunday, March 9 Monday, March 10 3:00PM V Golf vs. Lutheran South Tuesday, March 11 4:15PM V Baseball vs. Principia 4:15PM JV Baseball @ Principia Wednesday, March 12 4:15PM JV Baseball @ Ladue 4:15PM V Baseball vs. Pattonville Thursday, March 13 Friday, March 14 8:00AM Junior Ring Mass

Volume XLVI - Issue 24  
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