SGN December 9, 2022

ISSUE 49

C E L E B R AT I N G

VOLUME 50

48 YEARS

F R I D AY

IN

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

PRINT S E AT T L E ’ S L G B T Q I A + N E W S & E N T E R TA I N M E N T W E E K LY S I N C E 19 74

BRITTNEY GRINER FREED

by A.V. Eichenbaum SGN Editor-in-Chief WNBA star Brittney Griner was released from a Russian penal colony and is on her way home, announced the White House Thursday, December 8.

The two-time Olympic medalist, who was arrested at Sheremetyevo airport for possession of less than a gram of cannabis vape oil in February, was exchanged for Viktor Bout, a former Soviet Army lieutenant and arms dealer nicknamed “The Merchant of Death.”

see GRINER page 17

Photo by Brian Snyder / Reuters

Drag and piano duo “reignite” for cathartic Christmas Justin Vivian Bond as Kiki (r) and Kenny Mellman as Herb – Photo by Eric McNatt

by Daniel Lindsley SGN Staff Writer Kiki and Herb, the fiery performer duo founded during the early protests of the AIDS crisis, have returned for another musical Christmas tour along the West Coast this year.

They already visited the Moore Theater in Seattle on Thursday. On Friday, December 9, they’ll be in San Francisco, and on the evening of December 11, they’ll be in Los Angeles.

see KIKI AND HERB page 5

Life, death, and Smurfs Chatting about Spoiler Alert with author Michael Ausiello

Michael Ausiello (center) with actors Ben Aldridge and Jim Parsons on the set of Spoiler Alert – Photo courtesy of Focus Features

by Sara Michelle Fetters SGN Staff Writer Director Michael Showalter’s Spoiler Alert is adapted from popular television journalist Michael Ausiello’s best-selling

2017 memoir Spoiler Alert: The Hero Dies.

Both chronicle Ausiello’s 13-year relationship and marriage to photographer Kit Cowan, who tragically died from a rare form of neuroendocrine cancer in 2015.

see AUSIELLO page 7

2

SGN

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

ORIGINALLY SEATTLE GAY NEWS FOUNDED 1974 MEMBER 509 10th Ave E Seattle, WA 98102 (206) 324-4297 info@sgn.org sgn.org

SUPPORT INDEPENDENT JOURNALISM

DONATE TO SGN TODAY!

Publisher Angela Cragin Editor-in-Chief A.V. Eichenbaum Copy Editor SGN Staff • Richard Isaac Advertising Maggie Bloodstone, Advertising Manager National Advertising Rep. Rivendell Media (212) 242-6863 Staff Writers Lindsey Anderson • Mike Andrew Sara Michelle Fetters • Daniel Lindsley

SHOW YOUR PRIDE! seattlegaynews.redbubble.com

Contributing Writers Alice Bloch • Maggie Bloodstone Sharon Cumberland • Carter Hemion Jack Hilovsky • Benny Loy • Isabel Mata Gaysha Starr Social Media Team Lindsey Anderson • A.V. Eichenbaum

Merch Store!

Photographers Nate Gowdy • SGN Staff Comics Otts Bolisay Production Mike Pham SGN is published by Angela Cragin. © 2022. All Rights Reserved. Reprints by permission.

Publication of names, photographs, or likeness of any person, organization, event or business in this publication cannot be taken as any indication of the sexual orientation of the person, organization, event or business.

Opinions expressed in bylined articles, columns, and letters are those of the authors only and do not necessarily reflect the views of the staff or management of this paper.

SGN welcomes unsolicited material, including letters to the editor, but reserves the right to edit or reject material.

All rights revert to authors upon publication.

We assume no liability for loss or damage of materials, solicited or not. We invite feedback, please write.

And please play safe.

It is our policy that no money shall be refunded if you choose to cancel your ad. Credit will be given for the balance owed.

No exceptions.

In Loving Memory Of George Bakan

Scott Roger Alpert Cookie Andrews-Hunt James Arnold Ken Campbell Belial Darshan Steve Foiles Shaun Knittel James Leland Moore Don Paulson Randy Peters Lee Richeson Shaun Shelton Jim Tully

Follow SGN

VISIT US ONLINE SGN.ORG

In this Issue

LOCAL NEWS 4 A&E • FILM 5 BOOKS 9 TRAVEL 13 OP-ED 14 NATIONAL/INTERNATIONAL NEWS 16 DECEMBER 9, 202 2

SGN

3

Local News

Locals forge found families, combat holiday blues

(l) Photo by Anna Shvets / Pexels, (r) Photos by cottonbro / Pexels

by Lindsey Anderson SGN Staff Writer The holiday season can bring immense joy to those who dream about long-held family traditions, shared meals, and general coziness. Yet for others, it brings painful reminders of loss. It highlights the isolation they feel all year long and can become unbearable for those spending time away from loved ones. These holidays can be especially hard for Queer people who have become estranged from family who did not support their true identities.

Regardless of where people stand on celebrating the winter holidays, one universal truth remains: human beings need connection. Even when we try to convince ourselves we don’t, the fact of the matter remains: our souls yearn for a bond with others. We desire, on a deep, cosmic level, to see and be seen, to be understood and accepted.

For many LGBTQ+ people, the primal need for family is met outside of blood bonds. Community is found through unlikely avenues, places of work, local bars, and even online.

Forging connections at work Vesta, a Seattle local, took to the internet, not to find friends but to work. They joined the site WWOOF (World Wide Opportunities in Organic Farming) and picked up odd jobs for months. They thought the opportunity would lead to a paycheck but found so much more.

4

SGN

“About five months ago I joined an animal sanctuary with horses,” they said.

“Over these five months living and working on the farm, the host family kind of adopted me and taught me so many incredibly valuable life skills, helped me work through my mental health difficulties, and invited me to stay indefinitely.”

Vesta’s new family is one connected not by blood but by love. The family shared their home, their wisdom, and most importantly, their acceptance and thereby forged a connection.

Finding genuine connections through work environments is a common theme for those with found families in Seattle.

“I’m building [a found family] since I can’t expect anything from my relatives,” said Ellinor, who discovered a bond with others in her workplace who shared similar identities. “It’s primarily been from a team that I worked on a few years back that’s relatively diverse. They sort of took me under their wing, and we’ve all kept in touch ever since.”

Forming close bonds with co-workers is not only good for the individuals but has been proven to increase productivity.

According to Business News Daily, friendships at work increase employee engagement, job satisfaction, and productivity.

Close bonds between co-workers was listed as one of the biggest reasons employees choose to stay with a company. While it can sound cheesy, sometimes an office can become a work family.

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

When friends become family For some people, family means a group of friends knit tighter than most. For Ryanne, it means building a community out of her closest friends.

“The found family I currently live with are friends I met back in high school a decade ago, well before I transitioned.

They are married and have been there for me a ton over the past year as I’ve gone through a lot of heavy stuff, from cutting out my family to divorce, to mental health issues, to trauma healing, and so on.”

She is hoping to build more than just a family unit out of the group: a home where they can all flourish.

“I currently live with my closest found family, and have talked fairly seriously about starting a commune with the larger friend group,” she said.

“It’s gone through a bunch of iterations at this point. Considered a group of friends going in on a house purchase together, then saving up for a custom build sometime in the future. But different levels of commitment across the friend group made that idea difficult, though it’s still a future idea/ dream,” she continued.

“The idea we had was to get a plot of land with individual parcels/units and jointly construct a central common area to do communal meals and games, as well as be there for each other in the event life circumstances become difficult for anyone.”

The state of friendship Following the COVID-19 pandemic,

Americans, on average, are facing friendships from a new perspective. A survey by American Perspectives shows that people in the United States are reporting having fewer close friends than they did before 2020. Americans are also less likely now to reach out to friends during a difficult time than they had been in the last 30 years.

While there are many reasons for this decline, including a more polarized political environment, there is also reason for hope.

Americans today may have fewer friends, but the quality of the friendships they hold is only growing. For those who have strong bonds with friends, the statistics show a greater rating of happiness. American Perspectives also found that nearly one-third of those surveyed reported still staying close with a friend from childhood, and 69% reported having a best friend.

Friendship brings joy to Queer people regardless of the time of year or their relationship with their families. Even those with supportive and loving families often feel a strong need to connect with fellow members of the LGBTQ+ community.

Unlike other marginalized people, most of the time, Queer and Trans kids are raised by cis-het parents and do not have the same opportunities to connect to their culture and community.

Whether your found family is a group of friends, supportive co-workers, or a commune of loving people, cherish them this holiday season. Community is one of the sharpest tools to fight back against selfdeprecation and seasonal depression.

C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

Arts & Entertainment

cally addresses the issues of the day, Bond replied, “We just get drunk and mouth off.”

On some outlets calling it “cathartic,” Bond agreed: “Yeah. For us.”

“Maybe not so much for the audience,” Mellman added.

KIKI AND HERB continued from cover

Kiki DuRane and Herb are portrayed by Justin Bond (they/she) and Kenny Mellman (he/him), respectively, who spoke over Zoom from their rehearsal studio in New York.

“At that time, it was very immediate, because we were coming directly from street actions to performances, and people were dropping dead all around us,” said Bond of the act’s beginnings. “And we were there to help people laugh at all the corpses.”

To younger Queer people, that might seem callous and macabre, but for context, this was in 1989, when AIDS had already claimed the lives of over 40,000 people. It was the year of the famous protest at Manhattan’s St. Patrick’s Cathedral, where Gay activist Michael Petrelis and demonstrators crashed a Catholic mass to literally blow the whistle on the church’s condemnation of Gay people.

At least two years prior to that, protestors had begun blocking roads, locking themselves to the desks of politicians, and turning over cocktail tables at the meetings of pharmaceutical companies.

Even today, though, “people are being killed all around us,” Bond said, “and it’s really sad how little things have changed.”

For example, as of this year, over one million people have died in the US due to complications caused by COVID-19, and, as with most public health crises, vulnerable groups have suffered worse than the general population.

And that’s without going into the Supreme Court’s rollbacks of progressive rulings, and the wave of anti-Trans legislation in Republican-led states.

Renewed relevance “It almost tickles me that Kiki and Herb is still a relevant way to deal with things,” Mellman said, “because I hoped, when I was in my twenties, that there would come a time when it would seem passé and a little aggressive.”

“And in fact, I felt like it did for a while, and that’s why we stopped performing,” Bond added.

There was a period of eight years, between 2008 and 2016, when Kiki and Herb were thought to be dissolved. In truth, they were only dormant.

VISIT US ONLINE SGN.ORG

Justin Vivian Bond as Kiki (l) and Kenny Mellman as Herb – Photos by Eric McNatt

They made their names with performances fueled by the rage of prevailing injustices, first during the AIDS crisis, and then during a string of administrations whose records on LGBTQ issues ranged from conservative to mixed at best. They were nominated for a Tony Award in 2007.

The Obama administration, starting in 2009, oversaw big steps for LGBTQ rights.

It seemed to many Queer people, for that period, that the country was going in the right direction.

Sentiments changed when Trump was elected in 2016, and at that point, Bond and Mellman felt it was time for the aging

lounge singer and her loyal pianist to emerge once again.

“Give me a pandemic and I’ve got a raison d’être,” Bond said. “Give me a mass shooting, and I’m out there with my birdseed titties.”

As for the act itself, it features a mix of monologues and musical numbers by the characters Kiki DuRane, an aging, alcoholic lounge singer, and her pianist, known only as Herb. They perform songs from Broadway musicals, Nirvana, Britney Spears, and everything in between — whatever “feels right in the moment,” Bond said.

When asked about how the show specifi-

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

Inspiration Cathartic or not, the show’s lore has deepened over time. Unlike many fictional characters, who age only when the plot demands it, Kiki and Herb have grown older each year.

“When we first started doing it, Kiki was 66 years old, because she was born in 1930, and I was in my twenties, so obviously I thought 66 was really fucking old,” Bond said. “But now Kiki’s 92, which is not that hard to believe, because there are some really amazing cabaret performers, like Marilyn Maye, who are still performing.”

Marilyn Maye is currently 94 years old, but she wasn’t the main inspiration for Bond’s character of Kiki. Along with performance artists like John Kelly and musicians like Ann Magnuson of the psychedelic rock band Bongwater, Bond said, “I was inspired by my friend’s mother... a very intimidating woman, very intelligent — who was dying of cancer when I met her, and had been a burlesque dancer in Baltimore in the 1950s.

“She was just one of those people that, when she looks at you, you feel like she can see everything. And so when I was young, I wasn’t sure she saw much, and I was embarrassed by that.”

Mellman cited all the same inspirations, but “definitely Diamanda [Galás], and definitely John Kelly, because I played one of his shows before I really knew who he was, in San Francisco.”

As a final message before their tour, Mellman dropped any self-deprecation to say of Kiki and Herb: “Besides everything we’ve said, it’s actually entertaining. It’s light entertainment for the Christmas season.”

“I’m dedicating the show to my friend Bellial [Darshan], who used to write for the SGN,” Bond added. “He died in May of 2020. The pandemic didn’t treat him well.”

You can get updates on Kiki and Herb shows on Facebook and Twitter @ kikiandherb, and listen to their work on Spotify and Bandcamp.

SGN

5

Film

Spoiler Alert : The hero dies but love lasts forever

Jim Parsons and Ben Aldridge in Spoiler Alert – Photo courtesy of Focus Features

by Sara Michelle Fetters SGN Staff Writer SPOILER ALERT Theaters I read Michael Ausiello’s 2017 memoir Spoiler Alert: The Hero Dies during the height of the COVID pandemic. It revolves around the well-known television journalist’s 13-year relationship and marriage to photographer Kit Cowan who — as the title clearly states — does not make it to the end alive. Cowan tragically died from a rare form of neuroendocrine cancer in 2015, and Ausiello’s intimate chronicle of their time together is equal parts inspiring, heartbreaking, and uplifting.

Needless to say, as big a fan as I am of two of director Michael Showalter’s previous comedy-drama hybrids, The Big Sick and Hello, My Name Is Doris, I can’t say I was enthused when news broke the he was going to tackle adapting Ausiello’s memoir.

Especially after the uneven — if spectacularly acted — The Eyes of Tammy Faye, I was understandably cautious.

Thanks to the best performance of producer and star Jim Parsons’ career as Ausiello, Ben Aldridge’s star-making turn as Cowan, and Sally Field’s effortlessly charming work as the latter’s loving mother Marilyn, it turns out I shouldn’t have been worried. Spoiler Alert is a delightfully effective melodrama, one that pulls few punches and isn’t afraid of wearing a plethora of emotions out in the open for all to see. Little that transpires ever feels forced or false, the complex authenticity of Ausiello and Cowan’s relationship shining through every step of the way.

After giving audiences notice as to where things are going to end up, the story begins with Ausiello and Cowan’s “meet-cute” at a party and then proceeds along a somewhat familiar rom-com path. There’s a great bit where the television journalist finally allows his new boyfriend to see his apartment, only for him to discover the mother

6

SGN

of all Smurf collections. There’s another where Cowan is unexpectedly forced to out himself to his parents Marilyn and Bob (a curmudgeonly endearing Bill Irwin) that miraculously avoids cliché and ends up being surprisingly effective.

But as good as all these elements may be, it isn’t until Cowan receives his cancer diagnosis that Showalter’s latest hits its stride.

Parsons and Aldridge showcase heartrending chemistry, and their undying affection for one another, even with their many differences, is never in doubt. The eloquence

of the final act is sublime, and I love that Showalter and screenwriters David Marshall Grant and Dan Savage never shy away from the messier, even downright ugly, aspects of Ausiello and Cowan’s romance.

Other than Field and Irwin, the supporting players have precious little to do, and that does somewhat lessen the overall impact.

There’s also a cringy Christmas dinner at the Ausiello/Cowan household with the duo’s closest friends that feels as if it came right out of a 1990s sitcom — and not one of the good ones. While it’s a necessary moment

from a narrative standpoint, dramatically what is revealed falls hopelessly flat.

These are minor complaints, however, and there are so many delicately sublime moments throughout the second half that most of my misgivings all but vanish by the time this story reaches its foregone conclusion. While not quite as phenomenal as Ausiello’s source material — how could it be? — Showalter’s adaptation is nonetheless marvelous. The hero may die, but love still lasts forever, and that makes Spoiler Alert a timeless romantic melodrama worth swooning over.

Jim Parsons and Ben Aldridge in Spoiler Alert – Photo courtesy of Focus Features

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

Ben Aldridge and Jim Parsons in Spoiler Alert – Photo courtesy of Focus Features

AUSIELLO

continued from cover Equal parts inspiring, heartbreaking, and uplifting, Showalter’s drama is strikingly authentic in all the right ways. Producer and star Jim Parsons gives the finest performance of his career as Ausiello, while Sally Field is unsurprisingly sublime as Kit’s devoted mother, Marilyn. The remainder of the supporting cast is equally excellent, if at times somewhat underutilized.

But it is character actor Ben Aldridge who makes the most lasting impression. Much like the source material, Showalter and screenwriters David Marshall Grant and Seattle’s own Dan Savage put Kit front and center.

This is his story as much as it is Ausiello’s, and Aldridge makes the most of every second of screen time, delivering one of the best performances of 2022 in the process.

I had the pleasure to briefly sit down with Ausiello and chat about all of this and more.

Here are the edited transcripts of what he had to say: Sara Michelle Fetters: How is it being on the other side of all this, being the one getting asked the questions instead of asking them yourself?

Michael Ausiello: [laughs] It’s weird.

It’s completely weird, and I’m not entirely comfortable with it. I would much prefer to be on your side: in control, asking the questions. But I’m making the best of it.

SMF: In regards to control, you’d already laid yourself so bare in your memoir. I want to say it’s one of my favorite books of the last little while: it helped get me through the pandemic, so thank you. But what was it like giving up control and letting Michael Showalter and the screenwriters make this film?

MA: It was scary. I think it was the one thing that gave me pause. Not specifically Showalter and [actor] Jim Parsons, just the idea of a movie adaptation. I knew it would involve me relinquishing complete control over this story.

I’m so invested and protective of this story, and particularly of Kit, that it was hard for me to come around and feel like it was worth the risk. But then someone like Jim Parsons expresses interest and Michael Showalter comes into the picture, these incredible artists who I have a massive amount of respect for, and who, when I tell them I’m going to be involved every step of the way, understand and are on board with it.

SMF: You’re watching these people reenact and reinterpret your life. Is it possible to have distance? To separate yourself and be the artist that allows the story to go the way that it needs to?

You know how this works for television.

You know what makes a good story.

VISIT US ONLINE SGN.ORG

You know how these things need to be put together. But now it’s you. It’s your life.

Is it difficult to separate like that?

MA: It actually wasn’t that difficult.

I think part of it is because I knew going in that we weren’t doing a documentary, that we were doing a version of this story. There were some things that were super important to me that we [be] faithful to. Most of those things dealt with Kit and his parents, who I was very protective of. But beyond that, I understood that certain creative licenses had to be taken in order to make a movie.

I was on board with that as long as we got the important stuff right.

SMF: I think one of the incredible things about your memoir is that yes, it’s about you, it’s your journey, but you still put Kit front and center. The memoir is maybe more his story than it is your own.

Somehow the movie follows through on that, and does so in ways that don’t soften the rough edges. You allow yourself to be honest about the good, the bad, and everything that’s in between. Was that important for you when you were watching them put the film together, that Michael Showalter, Jim Parsons, and especially Ben Aldridge remembered that this is as much Kit’s story as it is your own?

MA: I didn’t need to remind them of that.

They wanted the same thing. We were all on the same page. I think one thing that was important to me — and again I got no pushback from Michael or Jim or any of the producers — was that I wanted the movie to not shy away from the messiness of love.

These were two very imperfect people.

This was not a traditional fairy tale by any stretch, and I didn’t want it to be depicted as such. Everybody was on board with that, and I’m so pleased that the movie doesn’t shy away from that stuff.

SMF: What was more difficult?

Watching Jim become you? Or watching Ben, who is extraordinary, become Kit? MA: None of it was too difficult. Honestly, so much of it felt like a privilege to be able to have both of those actors embodying these roles. I felt so lucky. I was on set every day, and mostly I was just sitting there with my mouth open being like, “Shit, these performances are incredible.” We haven’t even gotten to Sally Field!

Yes. Some of it was emotional, and I cried watching it. But mostly I wasn’t crying because I was watching my life be replayed before my eyes; I was crying because I was just so fucking moved by these performances.

SMF: You’re on set every day. Did you get embarrassed all over again by the Smurfs?

MA: No. Oddly enough, I’ve swung around. I’m now owning it [my Smurf fandom] in a way that I’m sort of proud of.

I remember that day very well. I wanted to be there the day Jim arrived on set, because

Jim Parsons and Ben Aldridge in Spoiler Alert – Photo courtesy of Focus Features

Ben Aldridge, Jim Parsons, Sally Field, and Bill Irwin in Spoiler Alert – Photo courtesy of Focus Features

I wanted to be there when he saw it for the first time. I wanted to see his reaction, and it lived up to my expectations. He was floored. It took his breath away.

The funny thing is, that’s only a fraction of my [Smurf] collection. They were only seeing maybe a small piece of what the overall collection is. That was a super fun day on set.

There was an unsettling aspect of it, and that’s because it was my actual Smurf collection, and seeing it out in the wild like that and seeing it be handled by other people for the first time was not the most pleasant thing. [laughs] But they were all super respectful of it, and they all understood how special that collection was for me.

SMF: I do want to ask, it’s so rare that we get to see an LGBTQ relationship that is authentically complex in a major motion picture. I know this year we’ve had Fire Island, we’ve had Bros, very fun and enjoyable films that have attempted to explore similar themes. But I don’t

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

think we’ve seen one that is this authentic, one that felt this real.

For you, as this gets out there to a wider audience that maybe never would’ve had a chance to read your book, what do you hope those audiences take away from the experience? What do you want them to feel or to be talking about as they exit the theater?

MA: I hope that they’re moved by it.

I hope they’re entertained by it. Beyond that, I wouldn’t want to project any of my own expectations or hopes or desires onto anyone else. As an avid moviegoer, I like to go into a movie with an open mind and a clean slate, without all that noise around me of how I should feel or the messages I should take away. I want to have my own personal experience. I want to walk away with my own thoughts and ideas.

So I want to leave that to the moviegoer.

I want them to have their own personal experience. That’s my hope.

SGN

7

Film

Santa slays in Begos’ ruthlessly nasty Christmas Bloody Christmas

Riley Dandy in Christmas Bloody Christmas – Photo courtesy of Shudder

by Sara Michelle Fetters SGN Staff Writer CHRISTMAS BLOODY CHRISTMAS Theaters / Shudder After closing down for the evening, all small-town record store owner Tori Tooms (Riley Dandy) wants to do this Christmas Eve is cut loose, get drunk, and get laid, more or less in that order. Her charming employee Robbie Reynolds (Sam Delich) convinces Tori to spend the evening with him, and the two head out into the snowy night, determined to have a good time.

What they couldn’t have anticipated is that the spiffy new animatronic Santa Claus (Abraham Benrubi) installed at the local toy store — and built with militarygrade circuitry — would go haywire. But considering that Christmas Bloody Christmas is the latest low-budget barn burner from writer-director Joe Begos (Bliss, VFW, Almost Human), the robot’s rampage is hardly surprising. This is a gruesome slice of holiday cruelty that knows exactly what it is and doesn’t try to be anything else, and that’s exactly as it should be.

Begos understands that it’s okay to take your time to get to the blood and guts. The filmmaker spends a good third of the 81-minute running time getting to know the characters and setting the Podunk Americana mood. Tori and Robbie are authentically contemporary twentysomethings. They swear like sailors, treat one another as equals, and cut loose as if tomorrow doesn’t matter and today’s experiences are the ones they’re going to remember for the rest of their lives.

Does the director do the same with anyone else? Not really. Maybe with the town’s boozy yet sympathetically courageous lawman Sheriff Monroe (Jeff Daniel Phillips), but I still never felt as connected to him as I did to Tori and Robbie. Everyone else who enters into this maelstrom is just grist for the meatgrinder, and while Begos once again shows proper ruthlessness as to who

8

SGN

lives and who dies, other than one notable exception, and unlike the characters in VFW, I can’t say that any of this robotic Santa’s victims generated an emotional reaction on my part.

Thankfully, none of that dilutes the gory fun. When Begos finally unleashes his monstrous Santa Claus, the carnage was worth the wait. This thing is Michael Myers on steroids or a T-800 after a serious upgrade. It is a single-minded, ho-ho-hoing killing machine that will not tire, shows no mercy, and is virtually impossible to stop. Once this Santabot gets Tori in its crosshairs, the only thing it wants to do is chop the young woman to bits with an axe, right along with anyone and everyone who happens to get in its way.

It’s extraordinarily sadistic, and what’s the use in showing one person get graphically cleaved in two when you can dismember a full half-dozen? Begos’ overall aesthetic frequently recalls John Carpenter or Joe Dante, but watching the unrestrained malevolence he typically revels in makes me think his true filmmaking spirit animal is Stuart Gordon. He’s absolutely unafraid of gore. Better, Begos also knows how to use it, as shock, awe, guts, story, and character development go laudably hand in hand.

He has a terrific heroine in Tori, and Dandy gives a rip-roaring final-girl performance that brought a gigantic smile to my face. Whether throwing back shots, dropping f-bombs, or picking up a high-caliber firearm and wield-

ing it like she’s related to Annie Oakley, the actress is an energetic dynamo of motion and enthusiasm. Dandy throws herself into the role, her slippery physicality and angrily terrified athleticism perfectly suited to the bonkers, seemingly never-ending chaos Begos unleashes during the finale.

The film is unrated for good reason.

Its plot is simplistic. Side characters basically exist only to get slaughtered. But Begos brings a deranged intensity to his latest horror-action hybrid that fits all of this violent absurdity perfectly. The director remains an unhinged maniac behind the camera, and I’m all for it, Christmas Bloody Christmas a nasty yuletide treat worth savoring.

Abraham Benrubi in Christmas Bloody Christmas – Photo courtesy of Shudder

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

Books

Found in a Letter 1959 : Poetic treasures emerge from a trove of family letters engineer. His pride in this accomplishment is obvious, for he wrote his letters on Naval Academy stationery. A photograph of one such letter is included in the book, and all those excerpted in Cumberland’s poems are included in full as a sort of appendix.

The letters and poems provide a vivid picture of life in a white, middle-class family in the 1950s, exemplified by the casual sexism that imbues Jack’s letters. Cumberland’s selections of lines from those letters and her poetic interpolations offer a sly critique of that sexism. For example, the poem “Girls” describes the competition Jack imagines among the wives of his colleagues, and goes on to comment on the gendered expectations for his son John and his daughters Linda and Sharon:

by Alice Bloch SGN Contributing Writer FOUND IN A LETTER 1959: A MEMOIR IN POEMS SHARON CUMBERLAND Ex Ophidia Press 107 pages $25.00 If you’re a regular reader of the SGN, you’re already familiar with Sharon Cumberland’s thoughtful, informative arts & entertainment reviews, but you might not be aware that she is a well-respected poet and scholar and professor emerita at Seattle University. Her newly published book, Found in a Letter 1959, also establishes her as a first-rate memoirist who isn’t afraid to experiment with formal innovation.

When Cumberland’s mother Ree died and her father Jack moved into assisted living, she came into possession of many boxes of the latter’s letters. Although he had no literary training or interest, Jack had a gift for letter-writing, turning everyday events of family life into interesting stories.

Most of the letters Cumberland used for this book were written by Jack in 1959 to his father, who was then in the hospital with prostate cancer. For six months, Jack sent his father a letter every day.

Rather than compiling a book directly from these letters, Cumberland used excerpts of selected ones and interpolated lines of her own poetry, written from the

Image courtesy of Ex Ophidia Press

point of view of her father at age 95. The result is one of the most self-effacing memoirs I’ve ever read, because Cumberland remains faithful to her father’s point of view and makes herself a minor character, seen through her father’s eyes.

Both of Cumberland’s parents came from blue-collar backgrounds. Jack pulled himself up into a white-collar job by attending the Naval Academy, serving in World War II, and then working for the Navy as a civilian

…each wife trying to outdo the other with her pies and sweets. Linda will be like that — she’ll make some man a loyal wife, and John will be as good a provider as a Scout. Sharon can’t seem to get with the program, though, using John’s microscope.

Jack seems to think that Ree does nothing but play bridge with her friends, but Cumberland’s interpolations show that her intelligent, frustrated mother ran a household, put together dinner parties on a shoestring, and played bridge, when she could have had a career if the times had permitted it.

However, in a particularly touching

poem, “Babies,” Jack’s letter describes a random phone call from a girl overwhelmed by babysitting. His kindness to this stranger is remarkable: I told her not to make the baby eat the spinach and to just give her the bottle and put her to bed, …

She called back a little later to say that the baby went right to sleep.

I congratulated her, said she was a big girl, a good sitter, the mother would never know.

(The italicized portion of the poem comes from the original letter; the plain text is Cumberland’s interpolation.)

If you decide to read Found in a Letter 1959 — and I recommend that you do — be sure to read the explanatory front matter first. This book requires special attention from the reader and would be confusing without the introduction. Don’t be dissuaded by this caveat; the pleasure of reading fine narrative poetry will reward your effort.

The book’s design is beautiful and appropriate. Kudos to Ex Ophidia Press for publishing this unusual work and doing it right.

To order the book, go to https://www.exophidiapress.org.

Timothy Janovsky gives LGBTQ+ readers the cozy holiday novel they deserve and so I just put on a playlist of Christmas music and I just started writing.”

Fans of the cheesy holiday romances of the mid-aughts may recognize some scenes in Matthew Prince. “[Holiday in Handcuffs] is one of the big inspirations for the book, because I loved how wild and bananas those movies were, like they were just off the walls hysterical…

“There’s this great romance trope called ‘only one bed,’ [wherein] the couple finds out there’s only one bed in the room… In this book we had ‘there’s only one bunk bed,’ which was inspired by the scene in Holiday in Handcuffs, where Melissa Joan Hart and Mario Lopez are in their little bunks just bantering with each other,” he said with a laugh.

by Lindsey Anderson SGN Staff Writer The holidays are here, and as snow falls over Seattle, there’s nothing better than cozying up by the Christmas tree and indulging in a seasonal Queer story.

This week, the SGN Book Club is reading You’re a Mean, One Matthew Prince, a Gay Christmas romance inspired by the hilarious and cozy vibes of classic ABC Family holiday rom-coms.

Meeting a demanding deadline You’re a Mean One is the latest novel from new author Timothy Janovsky. His debut book, Never Been Kissed, came out earlier this year. Releasing two books in less than two months would be pretty hectic for most authors, but Janovsky took the challenge in stride. “It was wild, but it was a lot of fun,” he said.

Janovsky wrote Matthew Prince first, but his publisher suggested releasing a nonholiday book ahead of it, setting the challenge to draft, edit, and release it before the holiday novel could reach the shelves.

“Funnily enough, during COVID, I lost my job, like a lot of people did. I was home and looking for a project, and I just for fun was writing what became You’re a Mean One, Matthew Prince, for my enjoyment,” Janovsky explained. “That’s the book that my agent sold on submission, but my publisher came back and was like, ‘We love it, [but] we want another book to be your debut novel, so that it reaches more people that might not read Christmas or holiday romances. Do you have any ideas?’

“And that’s when I pitched them Never Been Kissed, so I went ahead and wrote that one, and we just kind of flip-flopped the order, and the stars just aligned so that they could come out in the same year.”

VISIT US ONLINE SGN.ORG

Timothy Janovsky – Photo by Rebecca Phillips

Inspired by ABC Family While COVID gave Janovsky the perfect excuse to sit down and write his first novel, the idea for Matthew Prince had been stewing in the back of his mind for years.

“Aside from being homebound during the COVID pandemic and needing a fun, wintry escape, [I remembered] when I was a sophomore in high school [that] my best friend invited a group of us to go tubing in the Berkshires, and we stayed at her grandmother’s …rustic, beautiful, charming little cabin,” he said. “[It was] very remote, on the side of the hill, overlooking the water.

Snow was on the ground. It was wonderful.

“And I had a really deep obsession with ABC Family Christmas movies when

I was in high school. I don’t know why ABC Family in particular, but I just really did. And when I got out of the car, I was like, ‘Oh my gosh, they should set an ABC Christmas movie here,’ and I immediately got this idea of a rich guy that gets sent there, and they’re housing a local college student for Christmas and they butt heads.”

Janovsky couldn’t let his idea for a perfect ABC Family movie go. “I think I annoyed my friends for the whole weekend. Like, everywhere we went I was like, ‘Oh my gosh, and they go to the movies.

Oh my gosh, they go tubing!’ “…So, during COVID I remembered that and I was like, that would be such a fun thing to put to paper for the first time,

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

“Don’t I deserve a love story at Christmastime, too?”

From the moment Janovsky first thought of Matthew Prince, he knew the novel had to be Queer. “When I was a sophomore in high school, I had recently come out of the closet… I watched a lot of those ABC Family movies and never really saw a lot of Queer people in them. I was always like, ‘Why is that? Don’t I deserve a love story at Christmastime, too?’

“So [this book was always going to be] a male/male romance. When I sat down to write it, I was super duper excited to explore a story about people who love the way that I do, but still getting [to experience] all that ooeygooey Christmas magic, like baking together and putting up the ornaments, all those really fun, exciting Christmas traditions.”

For Janovsky, writing a Queer romance takes extra consideration. He can’t just take a heterosexual love story or trope and change the genders of the protagonists.

see JANOVSKY page 12

SGN

9

10

SGN

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

Episode 43: Michael Eichenbaum Ash and Lindsey set intentions for the new year and talk about Seattle Mens' Chorus, Trumpism, and Miracle on 34th Street! Special guest Michael Eichenbaum chats with Ash about their fascination with language, infiltrating online hate groups, and garden-themed amusement parks!

NEW EPISODES WEEKLY! FIND US WHEREVER YOU LISTEN TO PODCASTS! VISIT US ONLINE SGN.ORG

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

SGN

11

Books

JANOVSKY

continued from page 9 “The main difference between [heterosexual and homosexual] stories is that there is no one way to fall in love,” he said.

He got the chance to explore more of what makes Queer relationships unique when writing his debut novel, Never Been Kissed. “I mean, we have all internalized this universal truth that love looks like this, or love ends like this… In my first book, Never Been Kissed, Wren comes to the conclusion that he grew up on Nora Ephron movies and he’s like, ‘Oh, well, the man and the woman have a meet-cute, and the man and the woman get together, and the man and the woman get married,’ and he had internalized that for so long that he needed to realize that life doesn’t always work out like the movies.”

He took the lessons he discovered from Never Been Kissed into the editing phase of Matthew Prince. “When I went to revise Matthew Prince, I was also thinking that Queer folk have extra hurdles to go over. You could be attracted to someone, and that person could not be Queer. You could be wanting different relationship styles: you could be wanting an open relationship or a monogamous relationship. Certain things make a Queer relationship timeline fundamentally different than a heterosexual relationship.”

Queering up classic tropes Despite the many differences between Queer relationships and straight ones, Janovsky wanted to make sure that he wrote a story that would give LGBTQ+ readers the same happy feelings ABC Family holiday movies provide.

“So, in the book, I wanted to bring in all the same enjoyable tropes, like [that] Queer people can bake cookies just as well as heterosexual people can, but their love stories are going to look a little bit different,” he said.

“I would just say that Queer folk exist on a completely different relationship timeline than our heterosexual friends do. Sometimes our firsts are different. Sometimes our communication styles are different.

I got to explore that, and I also got to reflect on some of my own life experiences in the love stories I write, which I think is great, because I love the way people can see themselves reflected in them.”

Despite some of the struggles that may come with writing a Queer rom-com, Janovsky also found some freedom in the fact that the genre has yet to become as diluted as straight versions have. “I feel like one of the things that comes up a lot when I’m working on new stories is that Queer romance is still a very emerging genre. With the volume of them being published, more and more we get a chance to play with tropes that have historically been reserved only for heterosexual fictional couples,” he said.

“What’s fun is being able to crack open those tropes and explore them in a way that feels authentic to the Queer experience, because Queer folk have a different sense of time, so when we evolve or we connect with another person, a lot of times we get those same butterflies, but maybe in a different way.”

Exploring what makes Queer relationships unique has also allowed Janovsky to revisit classic rom-com tropes and give them new life. “I would say that second-chance romance seems like a really good one for Queer folk, because we all come into our identities at different times in our lives. So, you could have those really strong connections with someone, but maybe one of them doesn’t know they’re Queer yet, and then you meet again somewhere four years down the line, and now you’re both in your identities and …can connect. If I had to pick one, I think I’d pick second-chance romance.”

“I will make the very bold statement and say that pretty much everything I write ever will probably be Queer,” he added, “because my writing is influenced by my day-to-day life, and navigating the world as a Queer person is so integral to how I see the world and how I interact with others.

12

SGN

Timothy Janovsky – Photo by Rebecca Phillips

Images courtesy of Sourcebooks Casablanca

“I could even make the bolder statement that as time goes on, I will probably only exclusively write Queer people in my books, because [they] tend to travel in packs and support each other. I love to color my books with that kind of rainbow community.”

Writing a modern-day Grinch Writing Matthew Prince was also fun for Janovsky because he had the chance to develop a seemingly “unlikeable” protagonist. “In Matthew Prince, we have Matthew, who’s a spoiled-heir kind of guy, and he’s just bought an island …That’s like the end of the line for him with his parents, [so] he’s getting shipped off to a small town in Massachusetts for the holidays where he’s not going to have any cell service, and his cards have been cut up and he’s not happy,” he said with a laugh.

“I hope readers will come to the book with an open mind, because we meet Matthew at a super low point. I mean, he has reached the maximum level of privilege that you can have. He has swiped his par-

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

ents’ credit card to buy an entire [piece] of land to throw a music festival on, and that’s just like a big old no-no.

“I hope readers take away that Queer folks, especially if they’re unlikeable or messy or they’ve done bad things or made mistakes, they are just as worthy of love as other people,” he said.

While Matthew Prince is surely a fun romp, the novel also covers some more serious topics. “The book also touches on mental health, and it has a content warning for depictions and discussions of generalized anxiety disorder and panic attacks. I hope readers …take away that mental health is a really important thing to talk about, and the holiday time can be a pressurized experience, especially for Queer folk who may have to be around a family who aren’t necessarily accepting or understanding. I hope people also take [away] that while the holidays are a time of immense joy, people can be struggling. There are different colors to the emotions we can feel at [this] time, and they’re all valid.”

Christmas with the Janovkys The holidays can be very stressful, but they also bring great joy, especially to Janovsky, who looks forward to celebrating Christmas and his birthday with his loved ones. “I’m a December baby. I love everything about Christmas,” he said with a smile. “My favorite holiday tradition is when I go home… my parents set aside my …ornaments for the Christmas tree. Those ornaments date back to my first Christmas as a baby [and up] to when I graduated college. And what I like about that tradition is that they will never put them up for me.

They always leave space on the tree for me to put them up, and it’s kind of like a little walk down memory lane. I mean, they even have pipe cleaner candy canes that I made in kindergarten that are falling apart, and they’re like, ‘No, no, it has to go on the tree.’

So, that’s my favorite tradition.”

This tradition became a personal Easter egg in the book. “Of course, it wouldn’t be a Christmas novel without a… decorating scene,” he said. “Matthew has a kind of contentious relationship with his parents, but when he goes to his grandparents’ house and he starts decorating the tree with them, he notices that they’ve kept all these clay creations and… painted pictures that he used to make as a kid that his parents never wanted to hang up.... So Matthew’s like, ‘Why do you have these?’ and they’re like, ‘Because you made them and you loved them, and [when] we put them on the tree, it reminds us of you,’ and Matthew’s like, ‘Oh, I didn’t know that meant so much to you.’ “…It’s sort of a sweet moment where he realizes, oh, I have connections, I have these really beautiful emotional bonds, and so I got to give him that.”

Janovsky is brilliant at concocting the perfect cozy Christmas vibes, but there’s one classic holiday experience he has yet to have. “I think it would be super duper cute if a community got together with a group of carolers who went door to door and two of the carolers in the group had a meet-cute because they were singing different parts in the harmony. I just think that’s beautiful.

“One of the things I love most about Christmas movies is groups of carolers, and I have never gotten to experience that in real life. That’s like one of the Christmas traditions that has always escaped me. No one’s come to my door to sing, and I’ve never gone to someone’s door to sing.

I would love to gift that to fictional characters, because I think that would be so cute.”

What’s next from Janovsky?

This holiday, Janovsky is the author that keeps on giving! Fans of Never Been Kissed and You’re a Mean One, Matthew Prince will be excited to know that his third novel will hit shelves in 2023, and he’s got several more on the way.

“My third novel is called New Adult and it comes out in August of 2023. It is a Queer time-travel romance loosely based on 13 Going on 30. It tells the story of a struggling stand-up comedian who makes a really big mistake: he goes to bed at 23 and wakes up at 30, with, like, everything he’s ever dreamed he’s ever wanted his entire life, except for his best friend, who he’s been in love with for the last couple of years. Not only does he have to try to figure out what has happened to him and how to get back to his real timeline, but he also has to regain his best friend’s trust, and maybe, ultimately, they fall in love?”

Looking to heat up your new year?

Janovsky is too. “Immediately after that, I will be working with Harlequin, the publisher, on a new series of high-heat diverse romances. The first one I have coming out is called The Fake Dating Game… a fake dating romance on the set of a Supermarket Sweeps–style game show. So, I’m excited about that one,” he continued.

In the future, Janovsky also hopes to explore other genres and sees a Screaminspired horror thriller somewhere down the line. Until then, he will keep bringing joy to his LGBTQ+ readers, hoping for carolers, and bingeing classic ABC Family Christmas flicks.

C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

Travel

Pride journey: Oklahoma City

by Joey Amato Special to the SGN Since I began Pride Journeys five years ago, I have had the incredible opportunity to visit dozens of destinations around the world. Some I visited once, while others left such an impression that I yearned to return. Oklahoma City is one of the latter.

I first visited OKC while on a road trip to Las Vegas. While I was only there for one night, it piqued my interest when I found out about the viable gayborhood known as the 39th Steet District, where I stayed at a hotel then known as Habana. It has since been updated and rebranded as the District Hotel and served as my home base on this latest trip.

The property has changed a lot under its current ownership. The rooms especially have been modernized and are quite welcoming. During the summer months, the hotel is known for throwing outrageous pool parties that draw guests from miles around. There is also a nightclub, bar, and lounge on-site for guests to enjoy.

Gayborhood The 39th Street District is quiet during the day but really comes alive at night. There are no fewer than eight LGBTQ nightlife establishments in a two-block radius, putting the city’s nightlife scene on par with major LGBTQ destinations. (The neighborhood also contains numerous murals, perfect for those mandatory Instagram posts.)

Begin your evening with a cocktail at Apothecary 39, where the friendly staff and patrons will always make you feel welcome. Next, head over to Indigo Lounge, a newer establishment with more of a NYC chic vibe. The owner randomly introduced herself to us and told us about her collaboration with her daughter to create an open and inviting space. She gave off such a positive energy that it made us want to stay there for a few more drinks. And by the way, the drinks in OKC are strong and inexpensive: a Grey Goose cocktail will run you about $7.

You won’t find that in New York!

Finish off the evening at Angle’s, the district’s only true club, open Wednesday through Saturday, so be sure to swing by one of those days.

Everything shuts down in OKC at 2 a.m., though, so don’t expect to party too late.

Museum and memorial After a good night’s sleep, head to the First Americans Museum (FAM). This was my first time there, and I was so impressed by not only the modern design of the building but also the interactive nature of the exhibits.

The museum celebrates the 39 tribal nations that call Oklahoma home, although only a handful are indigenous to the state — many were removed from their homelands and relocated to what was then known as Indian Territory. The name Oklahoma actual derives from two Choctaw words, okla and homma, meaning “land of the red people.”

The museum’s full-service restaurant, Thirty Nine, offers a delicious brunch menu on the weekend. Some standout items include blue corn blueberry pancakes, the FAM skillet, and a hearty mushroom frittata.

I also like to walk by Oklahoma City National Memorial, which honors the victims, survivors, and rescuers of the bombing of the federal building on April 19, 1995.

A section of the old building still stands near the entrance to the memorial. The best time to go is early in the morning, when you can take your time to walk the grounds without the crowds. It’s a very somber experience that should not be missed.

Attractions After the museum, it’s time to do a little shopping. Swing by Queer- and femaleowned Common Dear for some rainbowinspired gifts, then head over to LGBTQowned Craig’s Emporium, a gem collector’s dream come true. The store is enormous and features a huge variety of gems, minerals, and so much more. I literally didn’t know which way to turn. You can easily get lost inside.

For the best views of the city, catch a ride on the Wheeler Ferris Wheel or go to Vast, a restaurant located on the 49th floor of the Devon Energy tower, the city’s tallest building.

One of the hottest attractions in Oklahoma City is Factory Obscura, an immersive experience created by local artists in which guests are given 3-D glasses upon entry to thoroughly enjoy the venue. I have never experienced anything quite like this.

It’s a combination of a maze, art instillation, and interactive playground. I’m not really sure how to describe it, but it was very cool and fun for all ages.

Photos courtesy of Joey Amato

VISIT US ONLINE SGN.ORG

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

Food What many people don’t realize about OKC is that it has a thriving Asian culinary scene. The Asian District contains dozens of restaurants, serving everything from traditional Cantonese cuisine to Vietnamese food, which is how it got its nickname of “Little Saigon.”

Try VII Asian Bistro, which is located in an unimpressive strip mall. But don’t let the façade fool you: the food is delicious and inexpensive. I highly recommend the chicken lettuce wraps and moo goo gai pan.

If you happen to be in town on a Sunday, there is no better place to be than the Boom for gospel brunch, starring Kitty Bob Aimes and Norma Jean Goldenstein. The drag duo had us rolling for the entire hourlong show.

I was so impressed by the improv talent of the two entertainers. (I was also told that the Bloody Marys are to die for.)

Spend the rest of the afternoon exploring downtown Oklahoma City, then head to the city’s Paseo District, a quaint neighborhood filled with shops, art galleries, and restaurants.

Make a reservation at Frida Southwest, a modern restaurant featuring elevated Latin cuisine, such as tuna tartare made with guajillo-orange-marinated ahi tuna, whipped avocado, and pickled onion, served with crispy corn tortillas. If you are in the mood for a heartier appetizer, try the short rib empanadas. For an entrée, I recommend the Chilean seabass served over a truffle corn and parmesan risotto, lobster beurre blanc, and sautéed baby spinach. I’ve had Chilean seabass before, but this dish ranks among the top I have ever tasted.

And of course, you must complete your meal with the Mexican hot chocolate cheesecake, because calories don’t count on this trip. It’s made with a hazelnut cinnamon brittle, chocolate dulce, and a spiced cinnamon-ancho crust.

I feel like all I did on this trip was eat, but Oklahoma City’s culinary scene has taken off in recent years, and the city boasts so many wonderful options outside of what it’s traditionally known for.

Consider visiting during OKC’s Pride on 39th festival and parade, which is scheduled for June 2-4, 2023.

Enjoy the journey!

SGN

13

Op-Ed

Have a jolly union holiday!

Pride At Work Special to the SGN As you search for the perfect holiday gifts for your loved ones, remember to look for the union label so that your presents also give the gift of good jobs.

If you’re travelling, or if your friends and family are coming to visit you, be sure to book a union hotel. You’ll sleep comfortably at night knowing the staff can afford gifts and special meals for their families.

And remember, the unions that represent retail, hotel, food service, and other workers have led the way in fighting for LGBTQ rights in their contracts and in legislation like Washington state’s marriage equality law.

The Washington State Labor Council’s Union Goods and Services Committee has an online resource you can use to identify union-made goods and services. Just go to https://wslc.org/buy-union-washington for the information. While you’re there, click on “Why Union?” to see the advantages of being a union worker.

Another great resource is Labor 411, which regularly updates lists of unionmade food, beverages, and gifts for special occasions. For example, you can look for shopping lists for union-made holiday gifts, gifts for her, gifts for him, and gifts for kids.

To be sure you shop at union grocery stores and retailers, you can go to UFCW 3000’s website and check the list of outlets the union represents. Many union grocery stores also have bakeries for your holiday cakes and cookies, and florists for your decorations.

Traveling to Eastern Washington?

UFCW 3000 also has a list of union stores in that part of the state.

If you’re looking for accommodations for yourself or friends and family, visit UNITE HERE 8’s website (https://www. unitehere8.org) for a list of union hotels.

Be sure to check the boycott list too, so you don’t accidently book a stay at a greedy anti-worker venue.

UNITE HERE also represents many concessions at Sea-Tac Airport. Check its list to see whom to patronize if you need a snack or a drink when you travel.

Have a wonderful holiday and help spread the cheer to skilled workers who do a good job and get fair pay and benefits in return!

Pride At Work is an LGBTQ labor organization affiliated with the AFL-CIO. You can find out about its work at https:// prideatwork.org.

Photo by George Dolgikh / Pexels

How I overcame the vicious cycle of fear 4. I learned how to manage my fearful thoughts.

The key in taking the edge off of your anxieties is managing your fearful thinking. Whenever I would get a negative and fearful thought, I would challenge it with positive statements and realistic thinking.

I also made it a habit to focus on the facts of my current situation and not on my negative thinking.

5. I was persistent.

There were times I felt like giving up because my fears and anxieties were so powerful and I didn’t know what to do.

I worried about what would happen, and that just made my fears that much stronger. During those times, I would consult a professional, and I made it a point to learn from my experiences so that I would be better able to handle these situations in the future. It is important not to give up.

6. I did not make excuses.

With a lot of practice, I became very good at reducing my fears and anxieties. I realized that the answers to my problems were out there; however, it was up to me to find those techniques that would get my life back on track. Making excuses would not improve my situation.

7. I realized that you can’t predict the future.

I realized that there are always factors and circumstances that I cannot predict or anticipate that could make a difference in my stressful and fearful situations. A person may be 99% correct in predicting the future, but all it takes is that 1% to make a difference.

The key is to focus on the present.

Photo by Pixabay / Pexels

by Stan Popovich Special to the SGN Do you ever get stuck in the vicious cycle of anxiety and fear? I struggled with this for over 20 years. As a published author of a book on managing fear, here is a brief summary of what I did to overcome these issues in my life:

14

SGN

1. I got advice from the professionals.

The first thing I did was to talk to various counselors, since they know how to conquer fear and anxiety. Whenever I talked to them, I would take notes, so I would not forget their advice.

2. I became an expert on dealing with fear and anxiety.

I did everything possible to learn as much as I could about removing fears and anxiet-

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

ies in my life. Besides talking to professionals, I read books, joined support groups, and learned from my experiences.

3. I surrounded myself with helpful people.

I made it a habit of surrounding myself with supportive people who understood what I was going through. This really helped me out when I was struggling with my anxieties and stresses.

8. I made the choice to get better.

You have to make the effort to find the answers to overcome your situation. It will not always be easy, but you can overcome the cycle of fear and worry with hard work and a willingness to learn from your everyday experiences.

Stan Popovich is the author of the popular book A Layman’s Guide to Managing Fear.

For more information about the book and to get some more free mental health advice, please visit http://www.managingfear.com.

C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

Why we need to stop weaponizing queerbaiting

Kit Connor – Photo by Vianney Le Caer / Invision / AP

by Georgia Skerritt SGN Intern If recent online debates, legislative trends, and hate crimes remind us of anything, it’s that authentic representation matters. The number of anti-LGBTQ+ bills filed since 2018 has passed 650. The recent shooting at Club Q in Colorado Springs killed five people and left the rest of the community concerned for its safety. Even with record levels of support and visibility for Queer people, we are still fighting for our rights. That means that even today, coming out is a calculated risk.

This brings us to an issue seen across the internet every day: queerbaiting as a weapon. Dozens of celebrities over the past few years have dealt with users of social media demanding that those in the spotlight publicly disclose their sexual and gender orientations. A new rule has effectively been put into place: label yourself for the world if you want to avoid social persecution and keep your community.

This needs to end soon.

The queerbaiting conversation The term “queerbaiting” was originally used to describe the ambiguous representation of LGBTQ+ characters in books and movies, where writers allude to queerness without explicitly affirming these identities. In a broader sense, it can be understood as inauthentic representations in an attempt to exploit audiences.

In recent years, however, the term has been used to “call out” celebrities, which is where things can get messy. Users all over the internet constantly scrutinize song lyrics, fashion choices, and celebrities’ social media presence to determine whether or

VISIT US ONLINE SGN.ORG

not they “really are” LGBTQ+ and, by extension, whether or not they are guilty of queerbaiting.

Eighteen-year-old actor Kit Connor, who currently stars as Bisexual Nick Nelson in the Netflix original series Heartstopper, recently took to Twitter to write: “Back for a minute. I’m bi. Congrats for forcing an 18-year-old to out himself. I think some of you missed the point of the show. Bye.” A few weeks later, musician Omar Apollo also announced his sexuality (albeit in a much more casual manner) in response to an accusation by another Twitter user who wrote: “Is Omar Apollo another queerbaiting singer?

Like those type ‘I don’t label myself, let me wear cropped [crop tops] and paint my nails and I say I find another guy hot’ cuz I like his song but I don’t like supporting straight men doing queerbaiting.” He replied with a simple: “no i b sucking d**k fr.”

Connor and Apollo (and every other celebrity who has dealt with these accusations over the years) should not have had to answer these questions in the first place. Yes, authentic representation matters. Creating roles and maintaining space for LGBTQ+ artists and creators is as important as ever, but there is still a fine line between upholding these standards of inclusion and gatekeeping their access to the support and acceptance of the community.

The issue of Queer safety Close to 240 anti-LGBTQ+ bills have been filed in 2022, and the number will continue to grow. Gender-affirming care for youth has been criminalized in several states, and discourse on gender and sexuality are now banned from schools in some places. Beyond blue bubbles, Queer people continue to fight for basic rights and equal protection.

Omar Apollo – Photo courtesy of the artist

Dozens of celebrities over the past few years have dealt with users of social media demanding that those in the spotlight publicly disclose their sexual and gender orientations.

A new rule has effectively been put into place: label yourself for the world if you want to avoid social persecution and keep your community.

This needs to end soon.

The anti-LGTBQ+ danger isn’t limited to those in power — we are also at risk in day-to-day spaces. For the last few weeks, members of the community have mourned the five victims murdered in the Colorado Springs Club Q shooting on November 19. The attack left residents there with one less space for social connection, and on a national level reminded Queer people that our safety is still fragile.

I have had the privilege of living in large, progressive West Coast cities for most of my life. I have had relatively minimal contact with homophobia, and my journey with sexuality and gender binaries has benefitted as a result. But attacks like the Club Q shooting are a painful reminder that our identities and spaces are vulnerable. It’s also a reminder that queerness is still inherently dangerous and that coming out is still a big deal.

In an era of unprecedented LGBTQ+ representation, we see proud displays every day both in person and online, but we still need to remember the weight of what it means to come out in the current political and social

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

landscape. Public queerness is a privilege and choice for people to make on their own time; it’s not the threshold for validity.

To clarify: Queerbaiting happens when writers and creators develop stories that tease LGBTQ+ experiences without confirming their existence in order to gain diverse viewership but avoid potential backlash. It’s not when someone uses nail polish or wears a certain kind of shirt.

LGBTQ+ existence is not monolithic.

When we give a pass to accusations of celebrity queerbaiting, we continue to operate from a specific definition of how to be Queer and create conditional standards of acceptability.

Personal exploration is important. Questioning binaries and trying on different labels should be encouraged. Forcing people, celebrity or not, to label themselves or come out publicly is emotionally cruel.

Let’s not police people’s expression of queerness. There’s enough room for all of us.

SGN

15

National/International News

Drag shows targeted by right-wing extremists

Local drag artist Naomi Dix and her supporters showed up at the Sunrise Theater in Southern Pines, NC in response to the Moore County incident – Photos courtesy of Naomi Dix

by Mike Andrew SGN Staff Writer Drag shows in several states have been targeted by right-wing extremists in the past several days.

In perhaps the most notorious incident, unknown persons attacked several electric substations in Moore County, North Carolina, on December 3, shooting out transformers and other equipment, and leaving 40,000 people without power.

“The person, or persons, who did this knew exactly what they were doing,” Moore County Sheriff Ronnie Fields said during a December 4 news conference. “We don’t have a clue why Moore County.”

Local LGBTQ community members said they suspect that the intended target of the attacks was a drag show, which the perpetrators hoped to disrupt by cutting off electricity to the venue.

National news highlights

by Daniel Lindsley SGN Staff Writer Memphis hospital defends delay on gender-affirming care A week after the American Civil Liberties Union accused the organization of halting gender-affirming care due to a new policy, a hospital under Methodist Le Bonheur Healthcare has stated that it has not changed its practices “regarding the treatment of Transgender and/or Nonbinary patients.”

“In recent weeks, some care providers voiced questions about patients receiving gender-affirming procedures at a facility affiliated with our health system,” said spokesperson Rachel Powers. “This resulted in a temporary pause to review current practices.”

The ACLU wrote a letter on behalf of 19-year-old Chris Evans, whose surgery was canceled less than a week before the procedure’s scheduled date.

16

SGN

True show business tradition, however, the show went on as scheduled, with attendees lighting the stage with their cell phones.

A December 3 Drag Story Hour on Staten Island, New York, also went on as scheduled despite the presence of menacing right-wing protesters. In fact, the event’s organizer, Yun-Hee Proffit, told NPR that the protest only reinforced their determination to promote acceptance and inclusivity.

According to the Staten Island Advance, the protest was organized by local artist and right-wing activist Scott LoBaido, who previously had disrupted an event featuring US Sen. Chuck Schumer (D-NY).

More than 50 members of the far-right white nationalist groups Proud Boys and Patriot Front marched in the streets of Columbus, Ohio, also on December 3. They were protesting a local school’s Holi-Drag Storytime event, in which three drag performers were to read children books and

sing holiday songs. School officials at Red Oak Community School decided to cancel the event, citing safety concerns.

“The world is getting more and more unsafe for the LGBTQ community. The attacks are constant and getting worse,” Red Oak Community School manager Cheryl Ryan told NPR. “The fact that we are not able to successfully host this simple event shows the extent of the damage. We have to do better.”

On December 4, a drag show brunch in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, was canceled in response to a bomb threat. News13 TV, a local TV station, received an email threatening to blow up the restaurant where the event was to be held. The TV station notified police, who evacuated the venue.

In the email to News13, the sender said: “We have placed several bombs in the Mr Fish Restaurant, 6401 N Kings Hwy. We are not terrorists [who] hurt children which

is why you have this warning to evacuate.”

“You b——- are all child abusers and will all burn in hell,” it said. “This event is grooming children. For all of human history its [sic] been known that the innonence [sic] of children should be preserved, you are scarring the future generations with your perverted fantasizes [sic]. You deserve to die and we will kill all you f—— for preying on children.”

Kate Ellis, president of GLAAD, told NPR that these and similar threats to drag shows are attacks on LGBTQ culture.

“So, drag has long been a place of joy, of protest, of expression,” she said. “It is really an art form. And it has been a sacred space, actually. It’s been a place where we have gathered as family, as friends. And it’s been a place of joy. And now it’s a place of terror, quite frankly.

“It really has changed dramatically in a very short period of time.”

“Ending medically necessary healthcare for one particular group of people based on sex, whether by formal written policy or simply in practice, is discrimination and violates federal law,” said ACLU attorney Lucas Cameron-Vaugn. “We will evaluate whether we need to file a complaint with the Office of Civil Rights once we have a response from the hospital.”

“We understand the physicians are moving forward with getting the patients rescheduled before the end of the year,” Powers said.

California lawmaker undaunted by 2nd bomb threat Gay California lawmaker Sen. Scott Wiener has revealed in a statement released on Twitter that he has received a bomb threat for the second time this year, although he implied it was far from the first threat of violence he had received since taking office.

Wiener accused Republican lawmaker Marjorie Taylor Greene, conservative activist Charlie Kirk, and “others in the MAGA conspiracy ecosystem” of inciting violence. Greene previously called him a “communist groomer” on Twitter. Kirk accused him of releasing “pedophiles” from jail, without context or explanation.

The threat against Wiener included striking similarities, also calling him a “pedophile” and a “groomer,” in line with

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

Photo by Rich Pedroncelli / AP

the surge of anti-LGBTQ rhetoric flowing from right-wing media and politicians across the country.

Greene’s communications director, Nick Dyer, told NBC News that Wiener was

“ridiculous,” without elaborating.

“I will always fight for the LGBTQ community — and for the community as a whole — and will never let these threats stop that work,” Wiener wrote.

C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

GRINER

continued from cover

President Joe Biden greets Cherelle Griner following the release of her wife Brittney Griner on Dec. 8, 2022, in the Oval Office – Official White House Photo by Adam Schultz

Brittney Griner, stands listening to a verdict in a courtroom in Khimki just outside Moscow on Aug. 2, 2022 – Photo by Evgenia Novozhenina / Reuters

International news highlights

by Daniel Lindsley SGN Staff Writer Anglicans go Galt over Gay bishops, marriage After many years of tension within the global Anglican Communion, this decade’s Lambert Conference showed that cracks in the church are widening over the issue of LGBTQ clergy members and same-sex marriage.

After married Gay and Lesbian bishops were invited to attend to the conference for the first time, the conservative leaders of Nigeria, Rwanda, and Uganda’s Anglican communities refused to attend, going as far as planning a conference of their own for April in Kigali, Rwanda.

Other conservative provinces asked that the conference reaffirm a 1998 resolution against same-sex marriage, and that the progessive provinces — like the Episcopal Church of the United States,

VISIT US ONLINE SGN.ORG

Viktor Bout is escorted by members of a special police unit after a hearing at a criminal court in Bangkok October 5, 2010 – Photo by Sukree Sukplang Reuters

and the Anglican churches of Brazil, Canada, New England, Scotland — be marginalized.

The separate conference’s agenda is expected to include criticisms of Archbishop of Canterbury Justin Welby, who is the ceremonial leader of the denomination.

But Welby has said that neither he nor the Lambert Conference as a whole have the authority to somehow sanction the provinces or impose certain demands.

“They are not careless about scripture.

They do not reject Christ,” Welby said at Lambeth. “But they have come to a different view on sexuality after long prayer, deep study, and reflection on understandings of human nature.”

Bishop Williams Aladekugbe of Nigeria’s Ibadan North Anglican Diocese called same-sex unions “ungodly and devilish,” and implied that a splintering from the greater Anglican Communion was likely unless something was done.

Tokyo court concedes need for same-sex protections A Tokyo district court ruled on November 30 that the country’s ban on same-sex marriage is constitutional, but it added that the absence of a legal structure to protect same-sex families did infringe on their human rights.

Nobuhito Sawasaki, one of the lawyers involved with the case, told Reuters with some reservation that the ruling was a good thing.

“She’s safe, she’s on a plane, she’s on her way home,” said President Biden in an announcement from the White House. Biden was joined by Griner’s wife, Cherelle.

“Today my family is whole, but as you all are aware, there’s so many families that are not whole,” said Cherelle Griner in her remarks on the release of her wife. “BG and I will remain committed to the work of getting every American home, including Paul [Whelan], whose family is in our hearts today…”

The Biden administration has received criticism for exchanging Bout for Griner over Whelan, who has been in Russian custody since 2018 on charges of espionage that the US government have called a “sham.” US officials have stated that Russia was only willing to negotiate for Griner’s release due to the nature of the charges alleged against the corporate security executive. Prior to the announcement Thursday morning, the White House had openly expressed their intention to bring both Griner and Whelan back to American soil.

“This is a gift to Vladimir Putin, and it endangers American lives,” tweeted House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy. “Leaving Paul Whelan behind for this is unconscionable.”

“We will keep negotiating in good faith for Paul’s release,” said Biden.

Griner’s wrongful detainment in a country historically hostile to the LGBTQ+ community, her status as an openly Gay Black woman and eight-time All-Star athlete, and the harsh, seemingly histrionic 9-year prison sentence she was facing made her case one that has grabbed national attention for months. Prior to the Biden administration’s deal, Griner had been moved to IK-2, a penal colony in Mordovia which is widely considered to be the harshest in the Russian prison system.

WNBA Commissioner Cathy Englebert issued a statement lauding Brittney Griner’s integrity in the face of turmoil. “BG has shown extraordinary courage and dignity in the face of enormous adversity. The WNBA is grateful beyond measure to the Biden Administration, the Special Presidential Envoy for Hostage Affairs, and all those who played a role in bringing BG home today,” she said.

The prisoner exchange took place Thursday morning in the United Arab Emirates.

Shortly after the exchange, Breanna Stewart, a teammate of Griner’s, tweeted “BG is FREE!!! 294 days and she is coming home!!!”

“BG IS FREE” and “#WEAREBG” were, at press time, trending on Twitter as fans, friends, and family alike enthusiastically awaited Brittney Griner’s return to the States.

Photo by Gareth Fuller PA via AP

“While marriage remains between a man and a woman, and the ruling supported that, it also said that the current situation, with no legal protections for same-sex families, is not good, and suggested something must be done about it,” he said.

The ban was taken to court elsewhere in Japan before. In 2021, it was ruled unconstitutional in Sapporo, but upheld in Osaka.

Tokyo’s ruling, coming from the capital, is likely to have the biggest impact.

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

“This is hard to accept,” said activist Gon Matsunaka, head of Marriage for All Japan. But he also believed that the recognition of same-sex families human rights was a “big step.”

Two other similar cases are pending in Japan. Activists and lawyers hope that enough local rulings in support of samesex marriage will push lawmakers to change the system, even if it won’t happen over night.

SGN

17

18

SGN

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

Happy Holidays!

VISIT US ONLINE SGN.ORG

DECEMBER 9, 202 2

SGN

19