San Francisco Bay Times - November 13, 2014

November 13-26, 2014 | www.sfbaytimes.com

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PHOTO BY STEVEN UNDERHILL

Beloved Lesbian Pioneer at 90

We want equal rights and full citizenship - whether in relation to marriage, joint income tax returns, inheritance and property, adoption, job opportunity, education or security clearances.

- Phyllis Lyon and Del Martin in Lesbian Woman, 1983

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Happy 90th Birthday, Phyllis Lyon!

The San Francisco Bay Times extends a special thank you to Kendra Mon and Phyllis Lyon’s family.

Coming Together in Celebration of Phyllis Lyon’s Birthday More than two decades later in San Francisco, I met Phyllis Lyon during a reception hosted by Elizabeth Colton, founder of the International Museum of Women. Elizabeth was welcoming supporters there in the Victorian parlor of her home, and a friend pointed out where Phyllis and Del were seated. I introduced myself as president, at that time, of the board of a non-profit called Bay Area Career Women (BACW).

By Dr. Betty L. Sullivan What a difference a life can make.

San Francisco City Hall celebration of SCOTUS decision, 2013

Phyllis and Del set into motion the worldwide lesbian liberation movement that continues to evolve, growing ever larger and stronger. of celebrating Phyllis’ birthday, which will be observed in private and public gatherings by her family, friends, colleagues, and community at large.

Many of us have our own “Phyllis story” to treasure and tell. I look forward to hearing yours! As for mine, I would like to take you back to a June day in 1978…

On that day, my parents were paying no attention to what I was reading in

the backseat of their car as we followed a flat, meandering two-lane highway through the cotton fields of the Mississippi Delta. We were traveling north toward Oxford, the university town where Ole Miss is located and the annual Yoknapatawpha Conference happens. Banking on their familiarity with seeing me carry books around, my guess was neither my mom nor dad would notice at all as I intently read

passages from Lesbian Woman by Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon.

Del and Phyllis courting in 1952

Marriage at City Hall, 2008

A few months after that, the BACW Board honored Phyllis and Del with the organization’s Lifetime Achievement Award. In December that year, they sat with me at BACW’s annual New Year’s Eve Dinner & Dance. They did so on many subsequent occasions.

On one of those holiday evenings, they surprised me with the gift of an autographed copy of the 25th Anniversary Edition of Lesbian Woman. They met my daughter that evening too and, in so doing, touched another generation with their story that’s even now being passed to yet another. The story of Phyllis and Del, one can predict, is now unstoppable and will go on.

I was given the task a few years later to select the “naming” honorees for a suite at San Francisco’s new LGBT Community Center. The first words out of my mouth were “Phyllis and Del.” The same thing happened a decade later, when Rainbow Honor Walk founder David Perry asked me whom I would nominate to be honored on the sidewalks in the Castro business district.

I was married, six-months pregnant, and pondering in that backseat what to do about the undeniable fact that I was in love with a woman.

W hile hoping this book might be my guide on what to do, I felt isolated and afraid. But it was the late 70s, and change was about to unfold—much more change than I could have possibly imagined for me or for the growing LGBT movement.

Now, on the occasion of Phyllis’ 90th birthday, I am reminded that without Phyllis and Del having paved the way through their hard work and unfaltering activism, I might still be stuck in the Mississippi Delta, somewhere north of Greenwood and just a bit south of Oxford. I am very grateful to be writing during this week of Phyllis’ 90th birthday at my desk in the back of a beautiful old Castro Victorian.

PHOTO BY LACY ATKINSA

The Daughters of Bilitis represents just one achievement of the remarkable Phyllis Lyon, who is celebrating her 90th birthday (November 10) this week. Her accomplishments and those of her wife Del, who passed away in 2008, have transcended in their signif icance to the highest of levels.

When we check the timelines and historic accounts, we are overwhelmed by what Phyllis and Del achieved, both as individuals and as leaders among leaders. The story that unfolds—some of which is shared in this issue of the San Francisco Bay Times—covers more than half a century. It includes bitter struggle, sadness, joy, triumph, and an unrelenting commitment to continue the good fight for human rights and social justice.

This week, and in the weeks to come, we hope you will join in the “season”

PHOTO BY STEVEN UNDERHILL

In 1955, when Phyllis Lyon and Del Martin founded the first lesbian civil and political rights organization in the United States, there were just 8 members. As historian Lillian Faderman wrote of the organization, The Daughters of Bilitis, “Its very establishment in the midst of witch-hunts and police harassment was an act of courage, since members always had to fear that they were under attack, not because of what they did, but merely because of who they were.”

With this and other brave efforts, Phyllis and Del set into motion the worldwide lesbian liberation movement that continues to evolve, growing ever larger and stronger. Their life’s work empowered not only lesbians, but also all members of our LGBTQIA community.

We honor and cherish you, Phyllis, and cannot begin to thank you for being who you are and for touching so many lives, including my own.

Dr. Betty Sullivan is the founder of “Betty’s List” and is the co-publisher/editor of the “San Francisco Bay Times.”

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Happy 90th Birthday, Phyllis Lyon!

We know deeply the influence Phyllis and Del have had on our community because we see it inspiring staff and patients every day at the beloved clinic named in their honor. They were pioneers ahead of their time. For decades, Phyllis and Del stood for the rights of lesbians within both the gay movement and the women’s movement; much like for decades the clinic has raised the banner of lesbian health within the gay and AIDS health movements and among the women’s clinic movement.

Phyllis Lyon’s 90 Years and Counting!

While maintaining a strong sense of lesbian identity, Phyllis and Del also never wavered in their strong social justice stance in the world— women’s rights, domestic violence, older women’s rights, combatting racism and classism. Lyon-Martin Health Services reflects those same fundamental commitments in our services. Never wavering from providing health services to lesbians, we also focus on providing care for women of color, low-income women, heterosexual and bisexual women,

older women, women with disabilities and transgender people. Just as Del and Phyllis are essential to our community and history, Lyon-Martin continues to be a lifeline to patients, now as a program of HealthRight360.

Since Del’s passing (and we miss her raspy voice calling to check in on how the health center is doing), Phyllis has become even more of an inspiration to our staff, board, and supporters. Attending fundraisers and occasionally dropping-in to say hi to the staff, she is a larger-thanlife hero to us all. A life-size photo of her adorns the staff break room, reminding us why we are here: to serve all who need to be served, stay true to our lesbian roots, and have fun while doing it! We are honored to carry on Phyllis and Del’s legacy in name and spirit and to wish Phyllis a very happy 90th birthday!

Marj Plumb, DrPH, was Executive Director of Lyon-Martin Health Services from 1989–1992. Dawn Harbatkin, MD, has served as Lyon-Martin’s Medical Director since 2006 and was the Executive Director from 2006–2008 and from 2012–2014.

PHOTO BY RINK

By Marj Plumb and Dawn Harbatkin

Phyllis with Lyon Martin Health Services clinic director Elizabeth Sekera; executive director Dawn Harbatkin, MD; and board president Marj Plumb at the KQED Local Heroes Awards 2013 at the Castro Theatre.

90

•1924- Born, Tulsa, Oklahoma, on November 10

•1943- Graduates from Sacramento High School

•1946- Awarded degree in journalism, University of California, Berkeley; serves as a reporter

for the Daily Californian

•1978- Phyllis and Del chair San Franciscans Against Proposition 6 (Briggs Initiative) •1979- Lyon-Martin Health Services is founded

•1940s- Works as a reporter for the Chico Enterprise-Record

•1989- Phyllis and Del join Old Lesbians Organizing for Change (OLOC)

•1950- Phyllis Lyon & Del Martin meet in Seattle

•1993- The couple is featured in the film Last Call at Maud’s

•1950s- Works at magazines in Seattle published by Pacific Builder and Engineer

•1995- They serve as Delegates to the White House Conference on Aging

•1952- Phyllis Lyon & Del Martin become lovers

•2000- Phyllis and Del sign on as a plaintiff couple in In re Marriage Cases filed against the

•1953- On Valeninte’s Day, Phyllis and Del move into a Castro Street apartment and adopt a

kitten

•1955- Phyllis and Del found the Daughters of Bilitis (DOB) in San Francisco

California law enacted by the passage of Proposition 22

•2003- Premiere of No Secret Anymore: The Times of Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon, directed

by Joan E. Biren, and supported by Woman Vision, is held at the Castro Theatre

•1955- The couple buys a home together on Duncan Street in Noe Valley

• 2003- On February 12, Phyllis and Del marry at SF City Hall, with Mayor Gavin Newsom conducting the ceremony.

•1956- Phyllis serves as Editor of The Ladder (until 1963); publication continues until 1970

•2004- The couple’s marriage was voided on August 12 by the California Supreme Court

•1964- Phyllis begins working at Glide Memorial Church and continues until retiring in 1987

•2005- Phyllis and Del are inducted to the LGBT Journalists Hall of Fame by the National Association of Lesbian and Gay Journalists

•1964- Del and Phyllis help to found the “Council on Religion and the Homosexual” with Glide Memorial Methodist Church

•1967- Phyllis and Del become the first lesbian couple to join the National Organization for Women •1971- Phyllis and Del expand policies of the National Organization for Women to include Lesbian Rights

•1972- Phyllis and Del are among the founding members of the Alice B. Toklas Democratic Club •1972- Phyllis and Del author the groundbreaking book Lesbian Woman, first published by Glide Memorial Church

•1973- Phyllis and Del author Lesbian Love and Liberation

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•1975- Publication of Battered Wives by Del Martin after Phyllis receives calls at Glide from women who were victims of domestic violence since 1964.

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•2006- Phyllis and Del are featured in Different Daughters: A History of the Daughters of Bilitis and the Birth of the Lesbian Rights Movement by Marcia M Gallo •2008- On June 16, Phyllis and Del become the first Couple to be married after the California Supreme Court decision legalizes same-sex marriage in California •2008-

On August 27, Del Martin passes away with Phyllis by her side

•2013- On June 26, a ceremony at San Francisco City Hall celebrates the U.S. Supreme Court declining to hear the California case against same-sex marriage; two days later, the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals lifts its stay, allowing same-sex marriages to proceed in California •2014- Phyllis Lyon celebrates her 90th birthday on November 10

Tributes to Phyllis

Happy 90th Birthday, Phyllis Lyon!

Attorney General Kamala Harris Phyllis has been a supporter since my earliest days in public service. She and Del always encouraged me to focus on caring for the vulnerable and the voiceless and, in particular, work to support girls and women. I am grateful for Phyllis’ friendship and will always consider her a mentor.

Kamala Harris is the Attorney General of the State of California.

Jewelle Gomez In college in the late 1960s, I combed the back pages of the Boston free weekly to find the ad for Daughters of Bilitis. I was always too afraid to call and find out where the meetings were, imagining upper class white women like Virginia Woolf who would reject me.

When I met Phyllis in the 1990s, I told her that story.

Just then, as she smiled that femme to femme smile up at me, I realized I didn’t need the meetings. I just needed to know the lesbians were there in the world waiting.

Jewelle Gomez is a writer and activist. She is the author of the double Lambda Award-winning novel, “The Gilda Stories.”

Dixie Horning So many know Phyllis as the defiant “rule” breaker and pioneer with Del. But it is not that role that impacted me the most. When I came to San Francisco in the 90’s, she and Del were Sheroes on pedestals of purple. Individuals far removed from my station in life. Upon meeting and being with Phyllis, she made me realize and appreciate that there are no “stations” of life, but that all of us are of value and worth. It was a defining moment of inspiration that allowed me to flourish in my job and in the SF community. There are no words that can measure that value.

Dixie Horning is the Executive Director of the UCSF National Center of Excellence in Women’s Health.

Kate Kendell It has been one of the great joys of my life that I am friends with Phyllis Lyon. She and Del were early mentors of mine when I first came to San Francisco as Legal Director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights. We would have lunch up at their house every few weeks. We would laugh and share stories and I would listen and learn. Del’s death in August of 2008 was hard on Phyllis. Theirs was a love story and a change maker story for 54 years. Even though Phyllis misses Del every day, she lives in the moment. She is still witty, she laughs easily and still remembers all her old rebel-rousing. She never expected to make it to 90, but we are blessed that she did.

Kate Kendell, Esq., is the Executive Director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights.

Melanie DeMore I first met Phyllis and Del when I was a college student in San Antonio, TX, in 1974–75. I was a very baby butch, just getting into the women’s music and political scene. I was pretty star-struck and never dreamed that years later I’d be sharing the stage with Margie Adam and Mary Watkins singing “Going to the Chapel” at the celebration of their marriage.

Phyllis has always been a beacon for me…a steady, proud voice that, no matter what, has remained clear and strong. A toast and a song of thanks now and always.

Activist and singer-songwriter Melanie DeMore was a founding member of the Grammynominated vocal ensemble Linda Tillery and the Cultural Heritage Choir. She performs and conducts workshops, and lectures both nationally and internationally.

Margie Adam I remember being astonished to tears when I first spotted “Lesbian Woman” in an airport bookstore—right there in public! Although I had never met Del or Phyllis, I was deeply inspired by their work. So when they took their seats that night at the Inez Garcia benefit, my nerves skittered. The theater lights never dimmed, so I could see them throughout the entire concert. I’ll never forget Phyllis—a fierce woman you would not want to cross swords with—singing along with me at joyful full throttle: “...Loving is believing in the ones you love.”

Margie Adam is a Women’s Music singer-songwriter who is currently an integrative counselor in private practice.

Roma Guy Most often with wide open eyes and extended arms, at times with mad fury, usually projecting fun even when life was a bumpy ride, Phyllis consistently proclaimed lesbian sex is fun and women loving women is sane.

We are forever grateful. Phyllis does look at social and political issues comprehensively, which I admire.

Patiently she enabled closeted lesbians to connect, and with a small group, she and her life partner Del Martin formed Daughters of Bilitis in 1955. Who would have imagined that the Daughters of Bilitis, the fork in the road, would have led to celebrating as we did when they legally exchanged vows and wedding rings as the first same-sex couple at City Hall in San Francisco in 2008.

Roma Guy is Co-chair of the Health Task Force and is a San Francisco-based health policy consultant.

Donna Hitchens Reading Lesbian Women in the early 1970s transformed my life. The effects were enhanced immensely when I met Phyllis after I moved to SF. Her courage, wisdom, warmth and compassion influenced my personal, political and professional choices. When I decided to start the Lesbian Rights Project in 1977, I wanted Del and Phyllis’ blessing and help. Although I was totally intimidated, I called the home number listed in the phone book. Phyllis answered and soon said, “Of course, dear, we would love to meet you and help.” That inclusiveness and generosity continues to this day.

Donna Hitchens was the nation’s first openly lesbian elected judge, serving on the San Francisco Superior Court bench. She co-founded both the Lesbian Rights Project and the National Center for Lesbian Rights.

Leslie Katz Phyllis, in her barely 5-foot frame, stands tall not only for all she did to advance LGBT rights, but also for mentoring those of us who followed. I still remember the rush I felt when she endorsed my Supervisorial Campaign, and then how she and Del were always there to offer insight and advice while I served on the Board. During the time I have been honored to know her, a few moments particularly stand out: 1) on the stage at MCC, she and Del were interviewed about their history and lives together, demonstrating a love lasting over half a century while being tested by so many external factors and their efforts to make the world better for generations that followed; 2) Phyllis and Del’s first wedding in 2004, and then seeing them legally married in 2008; and 3) witnessing the pride, joy and tears on her face when the U.S. Supreme Court ruled on Prop. 8, opening the door for legal marriage in California.

Phyllis: Thank you and Happy Birthday!

Leslie Katz is President of the San Francisco Port Commission. She served on the San Francisco Board of Supervisors from 1996 to 2001.

Diane Sabin JEB (Joan E. Biren) was in the process of making her film about Del & Phyllis, “No Secret Anymore,” with support from Dee Mosbacher. There were some real challenges along the way, and at one point someone from the production team expressed frustration with how difficult Del & Phyllis were being. I just laughed and said, “You’ve got to be kidding me. Of course they’re difficult. How do you think they changed the world?!”

Diane Sabin, DC, is Clinic Administrative Director at the Osher Center for Integrative Medicine at UCSF. Marcia Gallo Phyllis Lyon: our smart, funny, fierce femme lesbian! She blazed a trail and started a movement, inspiring so many of us with her passion for life, politics, Del and her family.

Happy Birthday, Phyllis—Cent’Anni!

Marcia Gallo, an Assistant Professor of History at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, has authored several books, including “Different Daughters: A History of the Daughters of Bilitis and the Rise of the Lesbian Rights Movement”(Carroll & Graf, 2006; Seal Press, 2007).

Judy Dlugacz When I think of the true sheroes of our movement and our community, there are no two more important than Phyllis and Del. Thank you, Phyllis, for the courage and the constancy that gave us all the ability to move the mountains we needed to move over the last half century.

Happy Birthday, dear friend, dear comrade. You are so much in our hearts.

Judy Dlugacz is the President and Founder of Olivia, the premiere lesbian travel company.

Karen Williams It’s been fifty years since I opened up a dictionary to look up the word “lesbian.” The paltry description, “inhabitants of Lesbos,” did little to aid my understanding of the feelings I was experiencing at the tender age of twelve.

Vague memories of a newsletter from the Daughters of Bilitis are supplanted by my own copy of Lesbian Woman

by Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon in 1972. My darling Phyllis, without you I would not have had the courage to step out into the unknown as a lesbian comic with pride, dignity, and the fortitude that you exemplify from the depths of your being. Phyllis, you are beloved and loved by me. I celebrate your 90th year with you! May your life continue to inspire, and may your days be filled with loud raucous and resounding laughter!

I love you!

“SF Bay Times” columnist Karen Williams, M.Ed, is a popular stage performer, author and motivational speaker. She is the Founder and CEO of the HaHA Institute, hahainstitute.com Marcy Adelman When I founded Openhouse, the first two community people I contacted were Phyllis and Del. They invited me to their house, where they offered their support and advice. I know when I say that I took strength from their courage, generosity and wisdom that I am speaking for so many of us whose lives were transformed by their love and their advocacy. Happy Birthday, Phyllis!

Dr. Marcy Adelman is the co-founder of Openhouse and is a leader in the field of psychotheraphy

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Happy 90th Birthday, Phyllis Lyon!

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We accept Medi-Cal, Medicare, and Commercial Health Insurance Plans and we continue to provide quality service regardless of a person’s ability to pay!

Building on over thirty years of service to our communities, we offer heartfelt primary care to women and transgender individuals. Mental Health Services Available!

Call today to make your first appointment:

415-565-7667

Visit our website today to learn more:

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In the Footsteps of Phyllis and Del: Emerge California

Silver Linings and Writings on the Wall

Photos courtesy of Emerge California

Democratic U.S. Senatorial candidates.

Guest Contributor Kimberly Ellis California Democrats garnered big wins all across the state earlier this month in the November General Election, and those victories provided a much-needed silver lining to an otherwise bruising and disappointing election cycle. For example, Sheila Kuehl’s victory in the Los Angeles County Supervisorial race and Speaker of the Assembly Toni Atkins’ re-election win in San Diego’s 78th Assembly District helped to boost not just morale, but also the number of both LGBT and women holding elected office in California, two demographics that continue to be sorely lacking in electoral politics.

Emerge California, an organization dedicated to changing the face of California politics and ensuring more demographic diversity in our elected bodies, including women of color, LGBT and mothers, also boasted big electoral wins. Inspiring and preparing Democratic women across the state to run for and win public office by providing comprehensive training and access to powerful political networks, Emerge California has trained more than 300 women, half of whom have already run for, or been appointed to, office with a nearly 70% overall win rate since its founding 12 years ago. In addition, 50% of Emerge alumnae are women of color with 12% identifying as LGBT. Twenty-seven Emerge California candidates were on November General Election ballots all across the state, running for everything from school board to city council to mayor to State Assembly to Congress. Of the twentyseven, more than 54% of them were successful in their races; compare that, for example, to the 36% win rate for

Programs like Emerge California are so important because we proactively ask women to run for office. By and large, women do not self-nominate, but rather have to be asked about seven times before they will consider running for public office. Women’s disdain for the political arena is a mix of both the rational and irrational.

Running for office takes money, moxie and means. Strong viable candidates have to be confident, charismatic and very comfortable asking for large sums of money. The business of politics is definitely not for the faint of heart.

Programs like Emerge California are so important because once we ask women to run, we train them, encourage them and provide them with longterm support.

For millennia, women have been socially conditioned to be humble, submissive and deferential. As a result, 52% of the population lacks the confidence, connections and access to power. In turn, women don’t run for public office at the same rates as men do. What we’re left with is a House of Representatives at the federal level where women only make up 18% of the elected officials and a state legislature where they only account for 25%.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, all of the research tells us that if we really want a more fair and just society, one that truly embraces and respects diversity in the form of progressive policy with respect to the environment, reproductive justice, education, gay rights, pay equity or prison reform, the quickest route to that outcome is through electing more progressive Democratic women at all levels of government.

In 2012, Tammy Baldwin became the first female U.S. Senator from the state of Wisconsin. Even more historic, she became the first openly gay woman to ever serve in the Unites States Senate.

But long before Tammy Baldwin was a United States Senator, she served on her local city council and county board of supervisors. California’s Sheila Kuehl was first appointed to a commission and then went on to serve in the State Assembly and State Senate

Sheila Kuehl before winning the seat for Los Angeles County Supervisor. And the same is true for San Diego’s Toni Atkins. Long before she made history by becoming the first openly gay female Speaker of the Assembly, she served on the San Diego City Council and was also the city’s Mayor.

It’s hard to believe that for all of the blazing social and technological advances our country has made in the past 50 years, electing more women and members of the LGBT community has inched along at such a glacial pace. It’s my opinion that one of the primary reasons we haven’t seen as much progress in our efforts to elect more people from underrepresented communities has been the lack of a more strategic and coordinated effort among likeminded groups and constituencies to recruit, train, mentor and support these individuals to run.

With nearly 60% of our current Congressional and Senatorial members having started their political careers at the local level, if the collective “we” want to ensure that our principles and values as Californians and Americans are reflected in our policies and laws, then we must work together in a more collaborative fashion and invest in building our talent

Tammy Baldwin bench of well-trained, well-positioned, well-supported candidates.

A little known secret that really needs to come out of the proverbial closet is that although California has a reputation for being the liberal beacon and progressive bastion of America, the truth of the matter is that in terms of local politics, comparatively speaking, California is more akin to states like Arizona and Georgia. Today, there are more Republicans elected to local office in California than Democrats.

Wait, what? Yep, true story.

The November 4 General Election provided some really important foreshadowing about the future of national politics. Here in California, we need to jumpstart our long game by looking at our (aging) current leadership at the federal and state levels (read Senators Feinstein, Boxer, Governor Brown, etc.). Now is the time to start grooming the next generation and building our bench of local, state and national political leaders. Working together and supporting collaborative coalitions and organizations like Emerge California will ensure that California continues to be a political trailblazer on the national stage.

Phyllis

Lyon,

another

one

of

California’s political trailblazers, celebrates her 90th birthday this week.

The founder of DOB (Daughters of Bilitis), the nation’s first lesbian organization, Phyllis has been shaking up the political world for decades. Today, her work continues to help shape the political and social debate around women’s rights, gay rights and equality.

As we look to 2016 and another possible presidential run by Hillary Rodham Clinton, we need to ask ourselves: “What are we doing to ensure the next generation of Phyllis Lyons, Toni Atkins, Sheila Kuhls, Tammy Baldwins and Hillary Rodham Clintons?” As a fellow Californian, I say, let’s not follow the trend; let’s set the trend. It’s time to show the rest of the country what California is all about. Let’s support efforts to recruit, train and groom the next generation of political leaders at the local, state and federal levels. Let’s work together to EMERGE! Kimberly Ellis is the Executive Director of Emerge California. You can learn more about Emerge California at their 2015 Program Kickoff Reception on Saturday, December 6, from 6:30-8:30pm in San Francisco. More details can be found at www.emergeca.org

Emerge California Alumnae

Toni Atkins 8

London Breed

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Malia Cohen

Lori Droste

Darcie Green

Emerge California

graduates of the Emerge California training program for Democratic women.

Do Ask, Do Tell Zoe Dunning On November 4, several women won local elections. Libby Schaaf will become the next Mayor of Oakland.

San Francisco Supervisor Malia Cohen won re-election to the San Francisco Board of Supervisors. Emily Murase retained her seat on the Board of Education. Three new women won seats on the City College Board of Trustees—Thea Selby, Amy Bacharach and Brigette Davilla. What do they hold in common? They are all

Ellen Kamei

Why do we need Emerge and programs like it? Even with these important victories, women lag woefully behind when it comes to elected office, surprisingly even in “enlightened” San Francisco. The most powerful citywide officers—Mayor, City Attorney, District Attorney, Treasurer, Sheriff, Public Defender—are all men. Our city’s three representatives in Sacramento—Mark Leno, Phil Ting and now David Chiu— are all men.

And seven of our eleven Supervisors?

Men. Detecting a theme here?

office. As a result, I was able to win election to the Democratic County Central Committee in 2012. I credit my Emerge CA training, as well as the encouragement and support (emotional and financial) of friends, family and colleagues.

So my call to action to you is to talk to a woman you’d like to see in office and ask her to run. It could be your sister, your mother, your co-worker, or your best friend. We need to hear more women’s voices in our city’s political discourse. Be persistent. And when they do decide to run, be there for them.

Research has shown that when women run, they win. So it is not as much an issue of discrimination at the ballot box as it is a deficit in feeding the political pipeline with qualified women. I know I myself did not seriously consider going through the Emerge CA program until friends and colleagues encouraged me to run for

“San Francisco Bay Times” columnist Zoe Dunning is a retired Navy Commander and was a lead activist in the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. She currently serves as the 1st Vice Chair of the San Francisco Democratic Party, as a San Francisco Library Commissioner, and as Co-Chair of the Board of Directors for the Alice B. Toklas LGBT Democratic Club. She is an alumna of the Emerge CA Class of 2010.

Elisa Marquez

Libby Schaaf BAY T IM ES NOVEM BER 13, 2014

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Round About - Retirement Party - Brio’s Joanne Jordan Photos by Steven Underhill stevenunderhill.com A standing room only crowd gathered at the Starlight Room atop the Sir Francis Drake Hotel for the retirement soiree celebrating the career of LGBT financial services expert Joanne Jordan. Jordan, along with her business partner Brandon Miller, founded Jordan, Miller & Associates and recently announced the group’s new brand name: Brio Financial Group (BrioFG.com). Friends, family, colleagues and community leaders enjoyed the evening, congratulating Joanne and her wife Jan Robertson.

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Round About - Cocktails with Olympia Dukakis

Photos by Rink

Academy Award-winning actress Olympia Dukakis welcomed and joined guests for photos at the cocktail reception held on Wednesday, November 5, at The McLoughlin Gallery in San Francisco . Hosted by the Horizon’s Foundation and sponsored by the San Francisco Bay Times, the reception also featured film director Harry Mavromichalis, who is making a new feature-length documentary, Olympia Dukakis: Undefined. Attendees were welcomed Jenna Heath of the Horizons Foundation, and Brio Financial Group’s Jim Rosenau.

Through his graffiti-inspired drawings, paintings, sculptures, and murals, Keith Haring created an immediately recognizable iconography that speaks to a diverse population. Making its US premiere at the de Young with more than 130 works of art, The Political Line lends gravitas to the artist’s career by focusing on his political activism. Exuberant, profane, witty, and provocative, the works in this exhibition trace Haring’s creative development and his historical significance as an advocate for social justice.

Keith Haring, Untitled, 1982. Baked enamel on steel. Private collection. Keith Haring artwork © Keith Haring Foundation

November 8, 2014–February 16, 2015 This exhibition is organized by the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco. Director’s Circle: Penny and James George Coulter. Curator’s Circle: Sloan and Roger Barnett, Ray and Dagmar Dolby Family Fund, Holly Johnson Harris and Parker Harris, and the Shimmon Family. Conservator’s Circle: The Buena Vista Fund of Horizons Foundation. Supporter’s Circle: Nancy and Joachim Bechtle, Juliet de Baubigny, and Richard and Peggy Greenfield. Community Partner: WEBCOR Builders. The exhibition is supported by an indemnity from the Federal Council on the Arts and the Humanities.

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BAY T IM ES NOVEM BER 13, 2014

11

Caregiving - The Missing Link?

Aging in Community Jeff Lewy As we age, we are likely to need major surgery at some point. Mine was a knee replacement. However, like many others who are aging today, I have been generally healthy all my life.

This has led me, like many others, to underestimate the need for effective caregiving in the recovery process.

Caregiving is a crucial part of recovery, but one my partner and I recognized only after surgery, when it was too late to arrange properly. I had never needed full-scale caregiving, and my partner had never been a caregiver before. After surgery, I was not in condition to arrange it properly, thanks to my relative immobility and mental fog from pain medication.

I had hoped we would be given instructions in advance on what would be needed, as we went through the examinations and preparations for surgery. At each of the meetings with my surgeon, my primary doctor, and the hospital before surgery, I expected to hear clear instructions on what would be needed, and be given a brochure, or at least a write-up, of what the caregiver would need to do, how often, and how to guide and help me—the patient—with my daily needs for bathing, toileting, eating, supervising my medication, and helping me with the rehab activities and exercises that began immediately after surgery. I also wondered whom I would call about questions that might come up once I was home.

But that didn’t happen. At each meeting, I thought, “This is when we’ll hear about caregiving.” But each meeting had some other purpose, and

Mae de la Calzada Mae de la Calzada, founder of LadyParts Automotive Services in Redwood City and longstanding friend and supporter of the San Francisco Bay Times and “Betty’s List,” passed away on Monday, October 27.

A memorial service was held on Sunday, November 2, in Daly City.

Memorial thoughts and comments are being added on her Facebook page, including the passage below by her sister, Donna de la Calzada: “My sister, Mae de la Calzada, was strong, courageous, full of compassion and love, and what gave her the most happiness was helping others. Our very own Angel on Earth is now a Guardian Angel in heaven. I have faith that there is a reason for everything, although I’m struggling to see that BAY TIMES NOVEMB E R 1 3 , 2 0 1 4

Once at home, I discovered that I was basically unable to do anything but lie in bed, sleep, and move slowly with my walker to the bathroom and back. I knew that I would not be able to go up or downstairs more than about once a day, and could not prepare my meals, and certainly not stand at the stove and cook. If I dropped anything, I couldn’t pick it up. If I needed water or food, I had to ask for it. I couldn’t make the bed, or even change pillowcases.

My husband was not prepared for my dependence and was surprised by how much care I needed. I needed his help to have something to eat or drink, or straighten the bed to make me more comfortable, or move my exercise machine on and off the bed several times a day. I needed him to check up on me every couple of hours to see to my comfort and well-being. Luckily, we have a home intercom, so I could communicate with him. But I was uncomfortable with how often I needed his assistance and did my best not to disturb him too often.

Two weeks after I came home from the hospital, my husband went out of town for almost a week on a trip that had been planned long before my surgery. No one had explained how long my recovery would take, so we had

About that time, I had several questions about what medications I should be taking, and what level of activity I should be reaching, so I called my primary doctor, and he took over my care. Now I know that the primary doctor should have been the “go-to” guy once I got out of the hospital.

My advice to anyone preparing for surgery is to ask early and often about what kind of care you will need at home. Develop an in-home care program with your spouse and your friends. Both you, the patient, and the caregiver(s) need to be educated about what to expect and what kind of help or resources your caregivers might need to help them care for you.

Don’t stop asking until you get detailed information about what to expect and what to do. In particular, ask your primary doctor to recommend or locate someone—nurse, case manager, social worker—who will give you the information you will need. Then make a plan.

Jeff Lewy is a long-term San Franciscan, whose primary interests are encouraging and expanding LGBT philanthropy, and forging links between LGBT organizations and the larger community. He has been a board member and volunteer for half a dozen community nonprofits, and works to promote effective social programs in the society at large. He remembers what it was like to be gay in the 1950s and does not want to go back.

Dr. Marcy Adelman oversees the Aging in Community column. For her summary of current LGBT senior challenges and opportunities, please go to: sf baytimes.com/ challenges-and-opportunties

Memorials

2014 Family Concert November 16 at 4:00

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I was on strong pain medication during my hospital stay, including when the case manager came to see me a few hours before my discharge. We briefly discussed which home health agency would come to see me for a few minutes every few days to take my vital signs and change my surgical dressing. Again, the hospital case manager failed to discuss the ongoing care I would need.

both assumed I would be relatively self-sustaining by then, but that wasn’t the case at all. I arranged for two friends, taking turns, to come check on me once a day. In retrospect, that wasn’t nearly often enough, but none of us realized it was unsafe or inappropriate for me to be alone 23 hours a day.

reason now. My body is weak. My heart is heavy. My spirit is very sad, but I find comfort in knowing that she will always be in my heart. Like the stars in the sky, there comes a point we can no longer see them on Earth, but it does not mean they are gone. They exist with as much life and energy as they did when they are born, like my sister today.

She may not be with us physically, but she’ll always be with us in spirit.”

Danny Williams A tribute to gay comic Danny Williams is on display at 18th and Castro Streets and a celebration of his life will be held on Sunday, December 7, 11:00 AM at Beatbox, 314 11th Street, San Francisco.

Treasured for his comic routines at benefits for many causes, Danny was renowned for his work as a host and facilitator on RSVP cruises and the

PHOTO BY RINK

Betty’s List, Bay Times, and the Oakland A’s present

so my husband and I assumed the next meeting would be when we would learn what we would need to do. And each time the topic failed to be covered, and we weren’t aware enough of its importance to ask about it ourselves. An occupational therapist did discuss how to make our house safe for me, and my husband and I were able to remove rugs, add grab bars, and figure out how I could move from bed to bathroom safely. I also received a walker and other post-surgical equipment that would be needed for my rehab.

Queen Mary2 first gay transatlantic crossing. Tributes have been posted on a special memorial Facebook page Danny Williams Memorial/Tribute

The 36th Annual

Benefiting The Women’s Building since 1978.

November 28, 29 & 30th, 2014 FORT MASON - HERBST PAVILION - SAN FRANCISCO

10am-6pm Celebration of Craftswomen features over 150-juried artists from around the U.S. This show is a unique opportunity to find gorgeous, one-of-a-kind holiday gifts, fine crafts, and contemporary art.

Learn more at www.celebrationofcraftswomen.org

Photo Credit: Judy Stone, Hermioni 3

BAY T IM ES NOVEM BER 13, 2014

13

That Affect the Bottom Line @Home in the Wine Country Costs During a Home Purchase It’s still a great time to buy!

Primary Residence Second Home Investment / Rental  Minutes to the Golden Gate   

Mark Penn

Toll free: 888-766-6622 Mark@HomeInTheWineCountry.com www.HomeInTheWineCountry.com BRE# 01425244

10% of every commission donated to the Sonoma Humane Society

Real Estate America Foy One of the biggest unarticulated questions most people in the market have is, “How much is buying/selling a

house going to cost me?” It constantly amazes me how valuable this simple information is to both the new and the more seasoned buyer or seller. It is not just commission that gets paid when a house transfers from a seller to a buyer.

There are a number of additional costs involved that sometimes dramatically affect the bottom line at the closing table.

The estimated and final closing statements are provided to give us an idea of what the costs associated with the transaction are going to be. The final closing statement is the actual cost.

Normally, the estimated closing statement is higher than the final closing statement, and that’s why most receive a check in the mail a week or so after closing.

Any of us who have bought or sold a home have received an estimated and a final closing statement. Go check your folders. There will be a closing statement in the mess of paperwork jammed into your file cabinet, or tossed in a box in the garage.

Here is a sample transaction, in the city of San Francisco, because each city has different costs associated with buying or selling there. This sample is based on a $1,000,000 sales price and an eight hundred thousand dollar loan amount.

Sales Price

$1,000,000.00

New First Loan

$800,000.00

Interest Adjustment 11/30 to 1/1, 32 day(s) @ $87.67

$2,805.48

Flood Check Fee

$25.00

Tax Service Fee

$60.00

Appraisal Fee

$450.00

Credit Report

$35.00

Underwriting Fee

$475.00

Concurrent Loan Charge (Est. Total: $150.00)

$150.00

Homeowner’s Policy of Title Insurance (Total: $2,431.00 as of 4/2/2012) ALTA Loan Policy (Total: $922.00 as of 4/2/2012)

$2,431.00 $922.00

Escrow Fee (Total: $1,450.00 as of 7/28/2014)

$1,450.00

Notary Fee (Est. Total: $250.00)

$125.00

Average Recording Charge (Est. Total: $110.00)

$110.00

Recording Service Fee (Total: $20.00)

$20.00

County Transfer Tax (Total: $7,500.00)

$0.00

Due from Buyer (est.)

So the total estimated cost for a buyer in the City of San Francisco who is purchasing a $1,000,000 home is $1,009,058.48. The extra $9,058.48 is nothing to sneeze at when you’re purchasing a home. It needs to be factored into your down payment amount because these costs cannot normally be financed. All of this means you will

$209,058.48 have to write a check for your down payment and closing costs when you go to sign your papers.

cost calculator. Alternatively, you can contact me and I would be happy to provide this information.

These numbers were provided courtesy of First American Title Montclair, which provides an online cost estimator available to all by simply logging into www.myfirstam.com and going to

America Foy is a top-producing agent with Sotheby’s International Realty at 2 Tunnel Road in Berkeley, 510-473-7775. For questions or suggestions for topics to discuss, e-mail him at americafoy@gmail.com

Is the First Time Becoming Impossible?

Real Estate Mark Penn I always say that Real Estate is “local,” and even our own Bay Area tends to be significantly broken into individual mini-markets that don’t always correspond with each other. But every now and then, an article appears in one of the national publications that has meaning everywhere.

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BAY TIMES NOVEMB E R 1 3 , 2 0 1 4

One of those significant articles was recently published in the Wall Street Journal, and it quoted some very interesting statistics about first-time homebuyers. The over-arching theme was that those who are trying to make their first home purchase are having a more difficult time than ever. While the portion of the market that has represented this demographic in the past has hovered around 40% since 1981, the current slice for 2014 is down to 33%, according to the National Association of REALTORs®(NAR).

There are several reasons for this shrinking piece of the puzzle, and although they are discouraging, they aren’t surprising. The typical first-time buyer is 31 years old, which is part of the issue. Most 31-year-olds haven’t had an opportunity to save the amount needed for a down payment. Many are saddled with crushing student loan debt, and the parameters for obtaining affordable mortgages have become more and more narrow.

It is no shock then that the rental market has become increasingly tight and every bit as competitive as the sales market, and we could write several articles on that subject alone. Another interesting stat shows that the year with the highest share of first-timers was 2010. What was significant about that year? Well, two things, at least: prices were significantly lower then, and that was the year that the federal government ended its tax credit for first-timers. Big changes.

Besides the logistical issues, the article also cites the psychological factors that might be behind the shrinking firsttime portion of the market. Those who have recently launched new careers, or otherwise are new hires in the recovering job market, may be reluctant to commit to a long-term obligation of a home purchase, having seen the entire economy implode, which was largely related to home purchases. It might just be true that the “dream” of a home purchase in

the millennial generation has slipped from laudable and achievable to downright impossible, leading many to simply cross it off their list of longterm goals.

This doesn’t just affect millennials. It’s systemic, really, as the first-time share of the market eventually transitions into the move-up market, and ultimately into the empty-nest downsizers. Building and maintaining a market that first-time buyers can securely enter is something that will need examination and stimulus, if the home-buying and selling market, one of the most significant pieces of our complicated economy, is to survive in the world as we know it.

In closing, a news tidbit: This month, the new Residential Purchase Agreement (RPA), also known as the “contract” or the form that is used for writing most offers on California residential real estate, is being released. If you’re thinking of writing an offer, or reviewing offers on your own property, be sure you ask your agent if this new contract affects you. It will have many significant changes to its language and provisions.

A Bay Area native, Mark Penn has been a REALTOR® with Coldwell Banker since 2004. He is also active in animal welfare, and is a former educator, facilitator, and air traffic controller. Mark can be reached at mark@MyHomeInSonoma.com

Anchors Away The purpose of the ANCHOR study is to determine if it is possible to prevent anal cancer by screening and treating lesions that might progress to cancer. These are called high-grade lesions or, officially, HSIL. The acronym stands for high-grade squamous intraepithelial lesion.

Friends of Naomi Dr. Naomi Jay, RN, NP, PhD The new Anal Cancer/HSIL Outcomes Research Study (ANCHOR) is about to open enrollment at UCSF and other cities. The rates of anal cancer are increasing in general, and are about 150 times greater among HIV positive gay men and 26 times higher in HIV positive women. The rates are also higher in people who have had organ transplants and are on steroid therapies for conditions like lupus, arthritis, and Crohn’s disease.

For the study, 17,000 people will be screened with Pap smears (in the “tush” it’s called a cytology test) and examined for HSIL. Among these individuals, the study organizers estimate that at least 30% will have the lesions. Ultimately, 5,058 HIV positive individuals will be enrolled across 15 sites in the United States. Participants will be randomized to treatment or screening alone for 5 years. The study hypothesizes that the treated group will have fewer anal cancers develop compared to the untreated group.

At first glance, the study seems shocking. How could this be ethical?

Screening to prevent cervical cancer in women began in the 1950s without any proof whatsoever that Pap smears would help prevent cancer—it did— but that is not today’s health care environment. We’ve been stuck in a catch-22 situation.

We know that the precursor lesion HSIL exists. We know its treatment prevents cervical cancer, but health care systems want proof that this is also true for anal cancer. Providers, health care officials and insurers have been skeptical that the measures advocated for anal cancer prevention work, are medically necessary, and are demanding evidence. This study is designed to provide this evidence and to establish the standards of care to prevent anal cancer.

Twenty-three years ago, an innovative study got underway at UCSF to find out if the anus, like the cervix, had a cancer precursor lesion. The study determined that this health issue was a bigger problem for HIV positive versus HIV negative gay men. It has been decades since we established that the problem exists. Now it is time to do something about it. And here we are: ANCHORS away! Would you like to volunteer, or do you have additional questions? If so, please call 844-4482888.

Dr. Naomi Jay is a nurse practitioner in the department of Infectious Disease at UCSF.

Round About Project Inform: Evening of Hope Photos by Rink The annual Evening of Hope Fashion Show of Project Inform was a must-attend fête featuring original fashions by local and national designers. Each original clothing item was created using condoms as a key construction element.

Known as “Condom Couture,” the fashion “with a message” items are one-of-a-kind signature pieces guaranteed to impress the fashionista. It was an amazing show, and one to plan on for next year if you missed this year’s event.

Say “The Bay Times sent me!”

Margaret Galvin, Showroom Manager at Ergo Depot Design Studio at 245 Kansas Street, SF, demonstrates how thoughtful design and tech can improve our health and work. She’s in front of the ESI Edge-Combo monitor arm system. Galvin says, “It elevates both my laptop and my monitor. Having my monitor off the desk at eye level helps to relieve neck, shoulder and eye strain.”

try the world's happiest chair only at (continued on page 28)

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BAY T IM ES NOVEM BER 13, 2014

15

What is STRIBILD? STRIBILD is a prescription medicine used to treat HIV-1 in adults who have never taken HIV-1 medicines before. It combines 4 medicines into 1 pill to be taken once a day with food. STRIBILD is a complete single-tablet regimen and should not be used with other HIV-1 medicines.

STRIBILD does not cure HIV-1 infection or AIDS. To control HIV-1 infection and decrease HIV-related illnesses you must keep taking STRIBILD. Ask your healthcare provider if you have questions about how to reduce the risk of passing HIV-1 to others. Always practice safer sex and use condoms to lower the chance of sexual contact with body fluids. Never reuse or share needles or other items that have body fluids on them.

IMPORTANT SAFETY INFORMATION What is the most important information I should know about STRIBILD? STRIBILD can cause serious side effects: • Build-up of an acid in your blood (lactic acidosis), which is a serious medical emergency.

Symptoms of lactic acidosis include feeling very weak or tired, unusual (not normal) muscle pain, trouble breathing, stomach pain with nausea or vomiting, feeling cold especially in your arms and legs, feeling dizzy or lightheaded, and/or a fast or irregular heartbeat.

• Serious liver problems. The liver may become large (hepatomegaly) and fatty (steatosis). Symptoms of liver problems include your skin or the white part of your eyes turns yellow (jaundice), dark “tea-colored” urine, light-colored bowel movements (stools), loss of appetite for several days or longer, nausea, and/or stomach pain.

• You may be more likely to get lactic acidosis or serious liver problems if you are female, very overweight (obese), or have been taking STRIBILD for a long time.

In some cases, these serious conditions have led to death.

Call your healthcare provider right away if you have any symptoms of these conditions.

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• Worsening of hepatitis B (HBV) infection. If you also have HBV and stop taking STRIBILD, your hepatitis may suddenly get worse.

Do not stop taking STRIBILD without first talking to your healthcare provider, as they will need to monitor your health.

STRIBILD is not approved for the treatment of HBV.

Who should not take STRIBILD? Do not take STRIBILD if you: • Take a medicine that contains: alfuzosin, dihydroergotamine, ergotamine, methylergonovine, cisapride, lovastatin, simvastatin, pimozide, sildenafil when used for lung problems (Revatio®), triazolam, oral midazolam, rifampin or the herb St. John’s wort.

• For a list of brand names for these medicines, please see the Brief Summary on the following pages.

• Take any other medicines to treat HIV-1 infection, or the medicine adefovir (Hepsera®).

What are the other possible side effects of STRIBILD? Serious side effects of STRIBILD may also include: • New or worse kidney problems, including kidney failure. Your healthcare provider should do regular blood and urine tests to check your kidneys before and during treatment with STRIBILD. If you develop kidney problems, your healthcare provider may tell you to stop taking STRIBILD. • Bone problems, including bone pain or bones getting soft or thin, which may lead to fractures. Your healthcare provider may do tests to check your bones.

• Changes in body fat can happen in people taking HIV-1 medicines.

• Changes in your immune system.

Your immune system may get stronger and begin to fight infections.

Tell your healthcare provider if you have any new symptoms after you start taking STRIBILD. The most common side effects of STRIBILD include nausea and diarrhea. Tell your healthcare provider if you have any side effects that bother you or don’t go away.

What should I tell my healthcare provider before taking STRIBILD? • All your health problems. Be sure to tell your healthcare provider if you have or had any kidney, bone, or liver problems, including hepatitis virus infection.

• All the medicines you take, including prescription and nonprescription medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements. STRIBILD may affect the way other medicines work, and other medicines may affect how STRIBILD works. Keep a list of all your medicines and show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist. Do not start any new medicines while taking STRIBILD without first talking with your healthcare provider.

• If you take hormone-based birth control (pills, patches, rings, shots, etc).

• If you take antacids.

Take antacids at least 2 hours before or after you take STRIBILD. • If you are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if STRIBILD can harm your unborn baby. Tell your healthcare provider if you become pregnant while taking STRIBILD. • If you are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed. Do not breastfeed. HIV-1 can be passed to the baby in breast milk. Also, some medicines in STRIBILD can pass into breast milk, and it is not known if this can harm the baby.

You are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit www.fda.gov/medwatch, or call 1-800-FDA-1088.

Please see Brief Summary of full Prescribing Information with important warnings on the following pages.

PALIO Date: 10.27.14 • Client: Gilead • Product: Stribild • File Name: 23164_pgiqdp_J_Winston_BayTimes_fi.indd Ad Size: 9.75” x 16.0” (Non-Bleed Newspaper Ad)

Winston Bay Times-San Francisco

STRIBILD is a prescription medicine used as a complete single-tablet regimen to treat HIV-1 in adults who have never taken HIV-1 medicines before. STRIBILD does not cure HIV-1 or AIDS.

I started my personal revolution Talk to your healthcare provider about starting treatment.

STRIBILD is a complete HIV-1 treatment in 1 pill, once a day.

Ask if it’s right for you.

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Winston Bay Times-San Francisco

Love Letters Inspire Wedding Vows To paraphrase Forrest Gump’s mama: Weddings are like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re going to get. Weddings are flavored by the couple as well as by the officiant. I encourage couples to customize their ceremony, allowing their personalities to shine through during their ceremony.

I enjoy working with couples, helping them to write their vows. There is very little that is legally required when it comes to vows. I therefore ask couples if they would like to write their own vows. Most people don’t have a clue on how to start. I share with couples that I have difficulty every month when I sit down to write a column. Even if I have a general idea for my topic, the first line or the f irst paragraph is the most difficult for me to write.

I have heard some experienced writers suggest that a writing project can be started in the middle and then the opening can be added later. I suggest that couples begin with the four words, “I love you because…” and then see where their thoughts take them. Even if they delete that opening phrase, it helps to get their emotions and their creative juices flowing.

Weddings Howard Steiermann I suggest that rather than focusing on the vows, brides and grooms think about writing a love letter.

This helps them to be authentic. It doesn’t have to be all mushy. They can include humor if that is their style. Most of all, they should share part of themselves. They can write whatever they want their partner to hear at the moment they’re about to get married, and whatever they feel comfortable sharing with their family and friends who are present.

While I always offer to edit what people have written, in most cases, no editing is required. I always

California LGBT Health & Human Services Network director Kate Burch was among the featured speakers on Monday, November 10, during a launch event held at Yerba Buena Gardens for Covered California’s bus tour. The tour, designed to raise awareness about Covered California’s second open enrollment period, visited more than 20 cities around the state. A social media conversation about the open enrollment can be accessed on Facebook and Twitter at CoveredCA and GetCoveredCA.

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BAY TIMES NOVEMB E R 1 3 , 2 0 1 4

strongly recommend to couples that they try not to commit what they have written to memory. In my experience, even the most comfortable public speakers get emotional at their wedding. It is then safer to have their written words in front of them. I print 18-point font so the words are easy to read in any light, and through many tears. I keep a handkerchief in my back pocket because it’s often needed. Oftentimes I will read aloud the vows of those who cannot say anything other than “I do” through their tears.

Whether you think you will be speaking your vows, singing your vows, or crying through your vows, start writing. Many of my couples have told me that procrastinating from starting was one the biggest humps that they needed to get over.

And yet, written and spoken, their vows were the item couples remembered most from their weddings… after their lover’s smile.

Howard M. Steiermann is an Ordained Ritual Facilitator based in San Francisco.

For more information, please visit www.

SFHoward.com

Time for the Supreme Court to Establish Full Constitutional Protection for LGBT People

Last week’s Sixth Circuit federal appellate court decision permitting Michigan, Ohio, Kentucky, and Tennessee to continue to discriminate against loving, committed LGBT couples in marriage makes clear that the time has come for the United States Supreme Court not only to rule in favor of nationwide marriage equality, but also to recognize that any discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity should be subject to heightened review under the federal Constitution.

According to the Sixth Circuit: “So long as judges can conceive of some ‘plausible’ reason for the law—any plausible reason, even one that did not motivate the legislators who enacted it—the law must stand, no matter how unfair, unjust, or unwise the judges may consider it…”

This erroneous position would seem to permit legislatures and electorates to discriminate almost carte blanche against LGBT people.

The Second and Ninth Circuits a nd ma ny lower cour t s have reached contrary conclusions. The Sixth Circuit’s opinion cries out for the United States Supreme Court finally to address the issue of sexual orientation discrimination head on, something the Court has never done.

The Supreme Court has identified four factors to assess whether a law discriminating against a particular group of people should be subject to heightened scrutiny, and

thus nearly always found to be un-

Marriage Equality John Lewis and Stuart Gaffney, Marriage Equality USA

constitutional. Those factors are: (1) whether the group has suffered a history of discrimination; (2) whether immutable or distinguishing characteristics clearly define the group; (3) whether the group is a minority or is politically powerless; and (4) whether the characteristics distinguishing the group have little relation to legitimate policy goals or to an individual’s ability to perform or contribute to society.

Sexual orientation discrimination clearly meets these criteria.

LGBT people have unquestionably suffered a long history of discrimination in American life. Indeed, until recently, half the states demeaned the very existence of lesbian and gay people by making our private sexual conduct a crime. Scientific consensus accepts that sexual orientation is a characteristic

Castro Improvement Project

• • •

that is immutable, and it is unfair to ask people to hide their sexual orientation in order to be free from discrimination.

LGBT people are clearly a minority of the American population.

Decades’ worth of statewide initiatives restricting the rights of lesbian and gay people, federal laws such as DOMA, and Congress’ failure to pass ENDA demonstrate our political vulnerability. And being LGBT bears no relationship to a person’s ability to perform in society—be it as a doctor, nurse, construction worker — or a married spouse.

Gender identity discrimination also easily satisfies these factors, but unfortunately nearly all observers believe that the Court will not address gender identity discrimination directly in these cases.

• • •

Heightened judicial review of governmental discrimination against LGBT people would establish constitutional protections for LGBT Americans with respect not just to marriage, but also to any way in which the government discriminated against us based on sexual orientation or gender identity. The time for the Supreme Court to act is now.

John Lewis and Stuart Gaffney, together for nearly three decades, were plaintiffs in the California case for equal marriage rights decided by the California Supreme Court in 2008. They are leaders in the nationwide grassroots organization Marriage Equality USA. Photos by Rink

At the intersection of Castro and 18th Streets, a ceremony was held on October 30 marking the completion of the Castro Improvement Project. The stage included a rainbow banner sent from New York City by rainbow flag designer Gilbert Baker. Among those performing for the evening were members of the SF Lesbian/Gay Freedom band, Gypsy Love, Amonay, Matt Alber and others. Speakers and dignitaries on hand included Mayor Ed Lee, Senator Mark Leno, District 8 Supervisor Scott Wiener, Castro Business District director Andrea Aiello and activist Cleve Jones.

YOUR WEDDING YOUR WAY AT THE JCCSF

• Grand Ballroom • Intimate spaces • Underground parking • On-site catering available • Warm welcome of inclusive community

415.292.1269 jccsf.org/weddings Sasha Photography

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3200 California Street, San Francisco, CA 94118 BAY T IM ES NOVEM BER 13, 2014

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Families of Choice Most people seem to follow one set of rules governing what is acceptable behavior from friends and another governing what is to be tolerated from families. Too many of us are reflexively willing to twist ourselves into pretzels in order to preserve relationships with family members. We put up with levels of abuse and insensitivity from them that we wouldn’t dream of tolerating from anyone else.

Roland Schembari and Bill Hartman Co-Founders in 1978 Kim Corsaro Publisher 1981-2011

2261 Market Street, No. 309 San Francisco CA 94114 Phone: 415-601-2113 525 Bellevue Avenue Oakland CA 94610 Phone: 510-504-9255 E-mail: editor@sfbaytimes.com www.sfbaytimes.com

Examined Life Tom Moon, MFT

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Family. It’s a powerful word that evokes many intense emotions. Now that the holiday season is here, many people are anticipating—and some are dreading—spending time with their families.

It’s common to romanticize family as representing nurturing, safety, belonging, and unconditional love. For some fortunate people, the reality actually approaches that idealized picture. But, since the days of Freud, psychologists have known that our families can also be the source of our deepest wounds and longest-standing emotional pain.

In what follows, I’ll be speaking to those who find their family relationships to be sources of frustration and suffering more than sources of love and support.

I’ve lost count of how many people who, when asked why they put up with so much abuse or neglect, just shrug and say, “Well, you know, they’re family.” Many of us never question the idea that we owe unconditional loyalty to our families. We believe that we have a duty always to be willing to forgive, and we never question the assumption that forgiveness means tolerating unhealthy behavior from family for a lifetime.

In the right circumstances, loyalty can be an admirable quality; but most people seem to understand that, at least where friends are concerned, it’s not wise when the relationship is destructive. Shouldn’t we assess family relationships by the same standards?

Psychotherapy regularly turns out to be about loosening loyalties to abusive family members, and often one of the greatest obstacles to success in therapy is a powerful taboo against looking clearly at what’s really going on there.

One of the most common forces cementing unhealthy family loyalty is called separation guilt, the (often unconscious) idea that ending a relationship with a family member, or even just setting up protective boundaries, is always an act of betrayal and abandonment, and never an act of self-protection or legitimate self-care.

This kind of guilt can obscure what should be obvious—that loyalty is rational when it’s earned, but not when it springs from guilt.

There are specific signs that a familial relationship may be toxic and therefore potentially dangerous to continue.

If you feel drained and depleted when you’re with the person; if you feel constantly angry; if you feel used and manipulated— then it may be time to move on. More seriously, if you feel yourself getting emotionally ill, or worse, physically ill when interacting with a relative, such that contact results in back and stomach problems, ulcers, migraine headaches, etc., it may be the body’s way of saying, “Enough, you’re killing me!” Perhaps most seriously, if you’re feeling intimidated or threatened, it may be time to end the relationship.

It’s common to assume that we’re stuck with our families, and that we have no choice in the matter, but it doesn’t have to be this way. As adults we have the power, if only we’ll claim

it, to decide who belongs in our “family of choice” and who doesn’t. One way to begin making self-affirming, rational decisions about who belongs in our family of choice is to make a list of all the important people in our lives.

For each person, ask some basic questions, such as: Do I feel safe in this relationship? Do we trust each other?

Do we support each other’s values and life goals? Is our relationship characterized by mutual affection and respect? Do I know and feel known by this person? Do we enjoy each other’s company?

Of course, no relationship is going to score one hundred percent all of the time on all of these criteria, but asking these questions about your relationships can quickly throw into sharp relief which are worth continuing and which are not. The people for whom you answer mostly yes to these questions are your family of choice, regardless of whether or not you’re related by blood. These are the people who deserve your loyalty, your commitment, and your love.

Tom Moon is a psychotherapist in San Francisco. For more information, please visit tommoon.net

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Free to Own a Jar of Buttons

By Kit Kennedy

CONTRIBUTORS Writers Rink, Sister Dana Van Iquity, Ann Rostow, Kirsten Kruse, Kate Kendell, Pollo del Mar, Heidi Beeler, Gary M. Kramer, Dennis McMillan, Tom Moon, Paul E. Pratt, Terry Baum, Gypsy Love, Rafael Mandelman, Kit Kennedy, David Campos, Leslie Katz, Bill Lipsky, Karen Williams, Donna Sachet, Gary Virginia, Zoe Dunning, Jim Tibbs, Mark Penn, Marcy Adelman, Stuart Gaffney & John Lewis Brandon Miller & Joanne Jordan, Kippy Marks, Naomi Jay, Jamie Leno Zimron Thom Watson, America Foy, Philip Ruth, Courtney Lake, Michele Karlsberg Photographers Rink, Dennis McMillan, Steven Underhill, Phyllis Costa, Cathy Blackstone, Robert Fuggiti, Bill Wilson, Jo-Lynn Otto, Sandy Morris, Abby Zimberg

Her own jar.

Each button threads a freedom.

This wooden one, a safe roof.

With this, she votes with that, she goes to school with that, she owns her home.

With the pearl one, she loves the mirror and her healthy strong body. Free to dress as she sees fit. Free to undress with whom she wishes.

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With the red button, she drives.

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With the purple, she travels.

She dances, she sings, she cooks

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perhaps only for herself.

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Free to say Yes. photo by Deborah S. Hall

Free to see all the buttons.

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Free to say No. Free to take such a jar.

Kit Kennedy is the “San Francisco Bay Times” Poet in Residence. For more information, please visit www.poetrybites.blogspot.com and kit.awegallery.com

Free to pass such a gift on.

Fortnight in Review

By Ann Rostow Circuit Split!

As you surely know by now, on November 5, a 2-1 panel of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Sixth Circuit ruled against marriage equality in Michigan and Kentucky, and slammed marriage recognition in two other states. Hmmm. Sometimes, I don’t know if I really want something to happen until it does. Only then can I tell whether I’m pleased or disturbed. And I feel a little pleased by our loss at the Sixth Circuit, just as I felt a little disturbed when the Supreme Court ducked review of all our marriage cases last month.

So how can I welcome a condescending antigay opinion that blocks marriage equality in four states, while frowning over a decision that opened the door to same-sex couples in 16 others? It’s because I want the High Court to consider the right to marry and I want them to do it now. A few days ago, that seemed unlikely. Now, with the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Sixth Circuit on record in favor of marriage discrimination, it seems possible.

Within a day or two of the contrarian ruling, all the advocates for the various couples involved in the suits reportedly decided to appeal directly to the High Court. Theoretically, they could have appealed to the full Sixth Circuit, but they would probably have lost before this conservative court, and more importantly, they would have wasted a year or so in needless litigation. A prompt appeal to the Supremes, by contrast, could allow marriage equality to reach the Court this session.

But could the justices sit on these petitions long enough for the matter to languish, and wind up on the 2015/2016 docket instead? I wouldn’t think so, but then again, who among us has made a dime betting on the Supreme Court’s maneuvers lately?

Linda Greenhouse?

Interestingly, the door is now open for our opponents at the Ninth Circuit to petition the Supremes as well. Idaho has already asked the full Ninth Circuit to rehear its October 7 ruling in favor of marriage equality. Why not go straight to the top now that the long awaited “circuit split” is upon us? For that matter, any one of the marriage cases now pending before the Fifth or Eleventh Circuits could be tossed into the High Court stew even without an intermediate ruling.

Check out SCOTUSblog for a rundown of the various scenarios.

A Matter of Opinion In the course of the last year, we’ve seen dozens of federal courts expound on equality, fundamental rights, and the guiding principles of the Constitution on our behalf. We’ve also seen three opinions go the other way: two from lower courts in Louisiana and Puerto Rico, and now the majority opinion by Jeffrey Sutton out of Cincinnati.

The Louisiana decision was your run-of-the-mill anti-marriage opinion, circa 2001. In Puerto Rico, by contrast, the judge went on a long diatribe about Baker v Nelson, a one-line dismissal of a marriage case from the High Court in 1972 that most consider a legal anachronism.

“From the vantage point of 2014, it would now seem, the question is not whether American law will allow gay couples to marry; it is when and how that will happen. That would not have seemed likely as recently as a dozen years ago. For better, for worse, or for more of the same, marriage has long been a social institution defined by relationships between men and women. So long defined, the tradition is measured in millennia, not centuries or decades. So widely shared, the tradition until recently had been adopted by all governments and major religions of the world.”

Say what?

I provided that entire first paragraph because it encapsulates many of the irregularities of the opinion. Much of Sutton’s polemic concerns the advantages of democratic change as opposed to legal authority. He writes about tradition, about the slow progress of society, about the rough and tumble of achieving democratic consensus versus the cold logic of the law.

And throughout the 45-page ruling, Sutton’s seemingly innocuous commentary betrays deep-seated bias.

Marriage is a tradition “measured in millennia,” adopted by “all governments and major religions of the world?”

But, hello? These are lawsuits. These are specific constitutional challenges.

These cases are not about “change.”

They are about the legal rights of two women in Michigan. Can they marry? Can they adopt their three children? They are about the status of married couples who now live in Tennessee, Kentucky and Ohio. Are they to become strangers under the law once they cross state lines? When one dies, will the other be listed on his death certificate? In Sutton’s view, these individuals should stay out of the courthouse and instead start a decade-long political process to amend their state constitutions.

Sutton continues, pointing out that the aforementioned Baker v Nelson is still in force, even though the High Court effectively legalized marriage in over a dozen states a month earlier.

And just because the Supremes allowed those marriages to go forward, he writes, doesn’t tell us whether marriage equality is rightly the domain of the courts or the electorate. It doesn’t?

That’s f lat out wrong. More importantly, why should the sixth circuit be musing about this false conflict to begin with.

As for the appellate courts that ruled in favor of marriage equality over the last few months, Sutton notes that they all employed slightly different constitutional analyses, as if the lack of four identical opinions somehow tarnished the conclusions of all.

With a pretentious undertone, Sutton goes on to reject several of the arguments in favor of equality with simplistic or tangential rebuttals. He observes, for example, that the Civil War-era drafters of the 14th Amendment never imagined that the equality and due process provisions would be directed towards same-sex marriage. I mean, COME ON!

Judge Sutton, in turn, has delivered a bizarre essay:

I usually don’t use capital letters. I think it shows a lack of imagination, a poor mastery of language. Surely a good writer can come up with the actual words that would convey the strong emotions that capital letters are aiming to suggest. But when I wrote that a minute ago, I was screaming in my own mind. Literally.

“This is a case about change—and how best to handle it under the United States Constitution,” Judge Sutton begins.

For Christ’s sake, the man goes on to smugly ask his readers whether or not we think the Loving Court would have ruled in favor of an interracial gay

Professional Services couple? No, we don’t. Nor would the Dred Scott Court have ruled in favor of the Lovings. Times change, Judge.

The Beat Goes On I could go on at length about Mr. Sutton, but I won’t. I should note, however, that the dissenting judge, Martha Craig Daughtrey, wrote a brilliant take down of the majority that highlights the contrast between the elegance of the arguments in favor of equality and the awkward contortions required of its opponents.

Meanwhile, a federal judge in West Virginia put the final touches on marriage rights in the Coal Mining State.

West Virginia has allowed marriage since the High Court declined to review the Fourth Circuit decision that controls state law, but the decision put a bow on the policy. And in Missouri, a federal judge struck the state’s antigay marriage amendment, but strangely limited his opinion to the St. Louis area. I’m not sure why this is so, but marriage news is piling up so fast that I lack the energy to look into it. The opinion, however, means that we will shortly have a case pending before the Eighth Circuit, the last of the federal appellate circuits to be presented with a marriage suit.

Finally, we should soon get a resolution in Kansas, Montana and South Carolina, three states that continue to resist the mandate issued by their respective appellate courts; the Tenth, the Ninth and the Fourth. Given that the Supreme Court has tacitly upheld marriage rights in those circuits, these states will have to prove that their marriage bans are somehow different from those that have been struck in their sister states. It’s unlikely that any federal courts will support such quixotic efforts, and it seems clear that state authorities are simply pandering to their conservative constituents.

For now, however, the tactic is working in Kansas, where the attorney general convinced Justice Sotomayor to put a temporary hold on a federal court marriage ruling based on the fact that related litigation is pending before the Kansas Supreme Court.

We’ll see how this pans out, but when last I checked, federal law trumps state law, and Kansas is now operating in an appellate jurisdiction that has abolished marriage bans in two separate cases.

J O H N S T O N, K I N N E Y & Z U L A I C A LLP

We’re Grrrrreat!

So now what? We wait. I recall that the High Court accepted review of Lawrence v Texas in December of 2002, scheduled arguments for March and ruled in June of 2003. So we might have to wait for weeks to see what happens here, but we now have hope.

In theory, I should now switch to other GLBT topics, but it’s hard. My mind, my entire being, is focused on marriage equality. And yet, and yet, there are other topics on our plate.

The Pope just demoted an antigay cardinal, earning him another feather in his rainbow cap. And Kellogg’s issued an advertisement for Atlanta Pride that features Tony the Tiger.

The far right is incensed. All their family friendly icons are defecting, and now, Tony has joined the other frosted flakes at Hell’s breakfast table.

Hey. Are there any golf fans out there? Have any of you in this subset followed Patrick Reed?

Reed is a blustering rookie who won three tournaments earlier this year and promptly announced that he considered himself one of the top five golfers in the world. Now, golf is a strange sport. It is characterized by honesty and humility. No golfer (continued on page 30)

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Gasoline and Matches

what they were fighting for, the collective needs of humanity may be realized.

Astrology Linda Amburgey Have you noticed the edginess in the air lately? This is not a time to collapse or to shrink away from your own suffering or that of others.

Humanity is being shown, with terrifying clarity, where we are stuck.

Pema Chodron teaches us that “fear is a natural reaction to moving closer to the truth.” Our collective spiritual evolution may be at odds with our varied individual desires, but rather than apathetically blaming the other guy, try standing in his shoes and realize we are all scared and scrambling for our own power. Be truthful to, and responsible for, the things that matter to you, while holding a compassionate, inclusive, and gentle eye on those with whom you do not agree.

When everyone sees themselves in the other, and cannot remember

ARIES (March 21–April 19) Your career is a bed of redhot lava. Authority figures may cause an additional eruption, but rest assured that you have the power in your punch to forge a new path for yourself. At the very least, you will have unusual stamina that will get you through the change in landscape.

TAURUS (April 20–May 20) The thunderous roar from the gods will awaken a calling within you that leads you into uncharted territories. Fear not, for you will have sudden insights informing your committed feet on this new path. Keep in tune with your deepest impulses and animal instincts.

GEMINI (May 21–June 20) A new tribe is sending smoke signals while you are fiercely battling the emotional demons that tie you to your past. The Universe is gifting you the weapon imbued with the necessary wisdom needed to fight your way out of this limiting frame of reference so you can follow the trail of smoke to your new family.

CANCER (June 21–July 22) Every battle presented this month in your relationships is a battle worth showing up to fight.

You will grain strength and knowledge that you need to protect your tender heart. This is a necessary step to becoming undefended in love. You must know how to use your sword, or you will never feel safe enough to put it down.

LEO (July 23–August 22) Structure and form are equally important as spontaneity and formlessness. Create some new habits with how you structure your daily routines. True freedom generally starts with commitment, and you will have fortitude to forge a solid, reliable path.

VIRGO (August 23– September 22) Life teachings and wisdom can be found in light-hearted play as well as in discipline and hard work. Sudden insights into your unconscious material will leave you dancing in the streets, or the sheets. You have earned the right to a degree of uninhibited binging.

LIBRA (September 23– October 22) Someone in your home will likely push

your buttons, causing a complete disturbance in the peace. Flow with the fray. Let it ruffle your more mature sensibility and rational mind, as the turbulence is the only current path for change.

Loosening around your image of being the one in charge will help you dissolve the very mask that makes you feel alone at the top. Let the instability being produced make you more accessible and human.

SCORPIO (October 23– November 21) You may find that your edgy tone will offend those around you.

You have been chosen to say the things that nobody else has the courage to say. Although you may begin with stability and poise, your words may set off a squall of unrest. This discord is the necessary evil before change.

AQUARIUS (January 20– February 18) Deeply entrenched in the collective’s onslaught of suffering, you may find yourself encountering the ghosts of humanity’s past. Sort out what is your personal material, and what you are merely absorbing and voicing for the collective. Give both a means of expression.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22–December 21) Your current responsibilities, and the way you organize and value your commitments, will certainly conflict with your more spontaneous impulsive side. An awakening of creative potential is the lava that flows from this inner discourse.

Continue to toil as the eruptions create new landscapes rich with the heat of your soul.

CAPRICORN (December 22–January 19) Your authority will be challenged by the very members of your clan.

As Heard on the Street . . .

PISCES (February 19–March 20) You have to slay those dragons that keep you from splitting your mystical self and your ordinary self. Do not denounce the material world in an effort to find God. If you float out of your shoes, who will bridge the portal? Your tribe needs you to operate within the structures of ordinary reality.

Linda Amburgey has owned Crystal Way Metaphysical Center for 11 years, and has been an Intuitive Reader for 20 years.

To book readings, on-going counseling for couples or individuals, events and parties, please e-mail her at ConsciousCounsel@ gmail.com or call 415-218-5096. Mention this column for a $10 discount.

compiled by Rink

What women, who are not relatives of yours, have had the greatest influence on your life?

Texas Starr

Garza Peru

Sean Dorsey

I am Fresh! White

Tina D’Elia

Filmmaker Monika Treut

Sor Juana Ines De La Cruz (15th century Spanish nun intellectual)

Shawna Virago

Sarah Frances

Shawna Virago

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WEDDINGS, HEADSHOTS, PORTRAITS

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#KateClinton2014 Take a break from davening for Democracy and celebrate our LGBT Vets!

Arts & Entertainment Carol Channing and Tommy Tune Razzle Dazzle Curran Audience Several of us here at the SF Bay Times are Broadway show fanatics, so this is high holy time with numerous shows playing now throughout the city. SHN’s season has been particularly good, with a true gem being last weekend’s “Time Steppin” featuring stage legends Carol Channing and Tommy Tune.

Ever handsome, dapper Tune tap-danced his way through the intro at the Curran Theatre before presenting 93-year-old Channing, who wowed the crowd with numerous songs, anecdotes and still-hilarious classic routines. If you need a good laugh, check out Channing’s “Cecilia Sisson” comedy sketch, which thankfully has been immortalized at YouTube: www. youtube.com/watch?v=G502-aSNs1Y (It’s a “tragic tale” about a silent film actress who was unable to make the transition from stage to screen because of her voice.) In yet another memorable moment, Channing shared how she performed at the wedding of Joan Crawford to PepsiCola CEO Alfred Steele. Apparently Joan was drinking a lot more than Pepsi that day!

Carol Channing today (top), Channing’s 1938 Lowell High School yearbook photo (middle), Young Channing with her parents George and Adelaide (bottom).

Born in San Francisco, Channing is one of our loca l treasures. She even hopes to be buried between the Curran and A.C.T. theaters. She joked that she measured her hips and believes that she’ll just f it in the narrow space between the two buildings. While age has slowed her down, affecting her mobility, Channing is still super sharp. Her stage persona is like a drag version of herself, with a brilliant mind behind it all. We were completely f loored and honored to get a chance to interview her before the show.

San Francisco Bay Times: We love your sharp wit, often based on thoughtful perceptions of others.

What have been some of the happiest, most joyous moments for you, both in terms of your life and career?

Carol Channing: (In terms of life in general) I think my fondest memories are from my childhood in San Francisco. Delivering papers with my mother…especially to the Curran and Geary Theatres… taking the Dinky…Oh, you probably call it a cable car…down the Embarcadero to get a 10-cent bag of shrimp, and watching the construction of both the Bay and Golden Gate bridges from our house.

(In terms of my career) I’m very grateful to Dolly and Lorelei (characters Dolly

Levi from “Hello Dolly” and Lorelei from the Broadway show of the same name) for what they did for my career, but I don’t spend much time in the past. The future always seems so much more exciting, and I find my joy in the current projects or shows I am working on.

San Francisco Bay Times: Your intelligence and sheer life force are astounding. To what do you attribute your incredible inner core of strength?

Carol Channing: I think I am just channeling my father.

San Francisco Bay Times: What was your first impression of Tommy Tune when you met him, and how has your relationship with him evolved since those early days?

Carol Channing: I met Tommy when he was in high school in Dallas, TX. I have always felt a connection to Tommy and have been impressed with his dedication to the craft. I was even more impressed with his mother. How such a tiny thing could give birth to so much…Well, so much. (Editor’s Note: Tune is 6’6.5” and is believed to be one of the tallest dancers in the world.)

San Francisco Bay Times: W ho have been some of your own mentors over the years, and how did they inf luence and inspire you?

Carol Channing: Oh, (sigh). Ethel Waters, she performed at the Curran when I was a little girl and I never forgot it (starts singing “Suppertime”). Later, we became good friends in New York and I told her about seeing her in San Francisco and the impact it had on me at the time. She was Chan’s (Channing’s son, Channing Carson) godmother. Gracie Allen! She picked me to replace her with George (Burns) in their Las Vegas act. It was like being sainted.

San Francisco Bay Times: What are some of your favorite places to visit and things to do in San Francisco?

For example, what would be a perfect night out in the city for you?

Carol Channing: You mean, when I was young? So much has changed. I remember wonderful trips to China Beach…Oh, but that wasn’t at night. I usually attended matinees at the theatre, so that wasn’t in the evening. Oh dear, I don’t remember anything I did at night. Isn’t that awful?

I’m going to visit some places while we are there this time. I have a whole list that I want to see…Grace Cathedral and Twin Peaks…Oh, the San Francisco Chronicle, where my uncle worked, and Frederick Burke elementary school. I’m going to speak at my high school—Lowell High School. They named the theatre after me.

I was just so honored when I heard that.

San Francisco Bay Times: Thinking of Tommy Tune, Jerry Herman, and many of your other colleagues, you have always been supportive of LGBT individuals, long before it was publicly acceptable to do so.

Did your seemingly easy acceptance of LGBT individuals come naturally, or was it something that developed more over time?

Carol Channing: I just never thought about it. They are your friends…or even family, when you work that closely with someone. They were…and, well, still are, I suppose…the most creative people I have ever worked with. There are a lot of us that owe the (LGBT) community for their support. They always seemed to know who was the most interesting and talented. That’s awfully self-glorifying for me to say, isn’t it? Well, they do.

San Francisco Bay Times: What do you think is the biggest misconception about you?

Carol Channing: That I’m glamorous.

I’m not. No, no, I’m not at all. I’m a character, because characters make you laugh and laughter is the best reward an audience can give a performer. Impersonators always seem to make me look so pretty…

And I just don’t think of myself that way. I participated in a Carol Channing look-alike contest once in San Francisco. I came in third. Really, third?!

San Francisco Bay Times: You have already achieved so much in your life. Your career is truly mindblowing. Your ambition still shines through. What else would you like to achieve? What haven’t you done that is still a goal for you?

Carol Channing: At the moment, 94 is my goal, and I’ll realize that in January.

San Francisco Bay Times: A lovely quote associated with you, from your doctor, comes to mind: “If you reach to the heavens to get the show out, the heavens answer you.” (Note that Channing was diagnosed with cancer several years ago while working and managed to go through treatments and chemo while never missing a performance.) Are you a spiritual person and, if so, how has that helped both in your life and work?

Carol Channing: Did I say that? Oh, how very inspiring, don’t you think? Am I spiritual? Well, I say my prayers and ask God for help, so I suppose I am. Obviously, something or someone has been looking over me and my career.

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25

Look for Mark Christopher Tracy in “I Love Lucy Live on Stage”

“I Love Lucy Live on Stage” is a new stage show that will take you back to 1952, when the hit TV series starring Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz was in the works. If you go, and we recommend that you do, you’ll be a part of the show, becoming a member of the studio audience awaiting the filming of two memorable “I Love Lucy” episodes complete with retro commercials and the rocking Cuban conga beats of “The Ricky Ricardo Orchestra.”

Out, talented performer Mark Christopher Tracy helps to hold the whole production together. We caught up with him just before the San Francisco run of the show, which is now underway at the Curran Theatre. Tracy originated the role of Maury Jasper in the Los Angeles production. What, you say you don’t remember Maury from the old TV show? We’ll let Mark explain!

S a n Fr a n c i s c o B ay Ti me s: Please describe your character Maury Jasper for us. It sounds like a very important one for this show. Was there a Maury in real life who was part of Desilu?

Mark Christopher Tracy: My character, Maury Jasper, is kind of an amalgamation of several personnel on a typical TV show set. He is primarily what we’d call a warm up guy these days, keeping the audience apprised of what’s going on between the scenes and keeping their enthusiasm up. He’s also kind of a floor director, counting in each scene: “Five, four, three…” etc. Interestingly, there was a man named “Maury” who worked on the “I Love Lucy” show, but his last name

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was Thompson. His wife was the camera coordinator and she worked in the booth. Even more interestingly, Lucy had a cousin named “Jasper.” How bout that?

There was a guy who interacted with the audience at Desilu Playhouse named Roy Rowan. He can be seen introducing Desi Arnaz in the behind the scenes, never-released “I Love Lucy The Movie.” Roy also did a lot of voice over for the show, doing the tags at the end of the reconstructed episodes: “This has been a Desilu production.”

San Francisco Bay Times: What have been some of the favorite moments for you doing the show?

Mark Christopher Tracy: We do a quiz show between our two episodes that asks for audience members to come up on stage and test their “I Love Lucy” knowledge. It’s a bit of a wildcard and has become my favorite part of the show! First, I never know what the contestant is going to be like.

When we were in Toronto (during the) last tour playing the lavish Royal Alexandra Theatre, I had one woman who may have, let’s say, made a few visits to the bar in the lobby. When she was up on stage, she apparently didn’t like that she didn’t answer the question correctly and exclaimed to 1,800 people, “S*it!” Now, this is, for all intents and purposes, 1952, and a person—let along a lady— would never say something like that out loud! So, after waiting about a full minute for the audience to calm down, I looked at (continued on page 30)

Intriguing Yet Muddled Snails in the Rain

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Gary Kramer Snails in the Rain, now out on DVD, is an intriguing but muddled story about Boaz (Yoav Reuveni), an extremely attractive linguistics student at Tel Aviv University during a hot summer in 1989. Boaz is receiving anonymous letters from a man who finds him, well, extremely attractive.

“I think about you incessantly,” one letter reads. Boaz is not exactly flattered by the attention. He is, in fact, creeped out by it. He doesn’t tell his girlfriend Noa (Moran Rosenblatt), but then again, she isn’t telling him of her plans to attend architecture school in Haifa.

When Noa discovers the letters, she tries to sort out who is sending them.

The f ilm, written and directed by Yariv Mozer, who co-stars as Boaz’s linguistics professor, is adapted from a story by Yossi Avni Levy. Perhaps something got lost in translation. Snails in the Rain is edited in a way that flashes back in time periodically to show Boaz’s experiences in the Israeli army.

The film also suggests that Boaz is paranoid, threatened by every man who glances at him, or makes a sexual overtone—intentional or not. Mozer seems so fixated on creating an atmosphere of mystery and doubt that viewers may not understand what is real and what might be imagined.

That said, viewers who are more interested in Reuveni’s chest and body will not have to worry about the plot.

Reuveni, a model making his acting debut here, barely does a scene without taking off his shirt, swimming in a pool, taking a shower, hitting the beach, or sweating in the kitchen,

bathtub or bedroom. He is beautiful and doesn’t give a bad performance, but it is hard to sympathize with him being pained at being so admired.

Snails in the Rain include several scenes where Boaz becomes aggressive towards men who make verbal and visual passes at him. He threatens a man who spies on him in the library, and later comes on to him in a men’s room.

He has an intense interaction with a man in a cruising park. And he cops an attitude towards Nir (Yehuda Nahari), an army buddy who calls him beautiful, strokes his cheek, and plants a kiss on him. Boaz also bumps into hot guys on the street, in the pool, in the locker room, and elsewhere, as if to suggest everyone wants a piece of him. His anger—at the letters perhaps, and his repressed feelings more likely—indicate that he perhaps protests too much.

That he takes his frustrations out on his best friend at the beach is barely excusable. When he forcibly sodomizes Noa in the kitchen, his actions are unconscionable.

Mozer may be addressing issues of masculinity in Israel, but the film’s portrayal of sex is curious. Noa happily brings Boaz to climax in the bathtub, but she does not bat an eyelash when he smacks her down in the tub for questioning his sexuality as he makes a comment about the guy in the library staring at him. Likewise, a flashback involving Nir locking eyes with Boaz while participating in a jerk off comtime before more talented LGBTQ professionals in the pipeline become tomorrow’s leaders.

Sister Dana Sez: Words of Wisdumb from a Fun Nun

By Sister Dana Van Iquity Sister Dana sez, “Congratulations, Apple CEO Tim Cook, for coming out gay! Your official Smart [TM2014] i-Toaster Oven is on its way to you.”

As the largest, global, nonprofit organization dedicated exclusively to workplace equality for the LGBTQ community, Out & Equal Workplace Advocates are proud of Cook’s decision to come out as a gay man. Out & Equal sees firsthand the power in coming out and being public about who you are and who you love. When a CEO of a global company like Apple comes out, it opens the doors for queer employees around the world to be their authentic selves. It also paves the way for more out executives and CEOs to do the same; once the queer ceiling has been broken, it gives employees the freedom to put all their energy into their work without having to hide their personal lives. That means it’s only a matter of

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THE CASTRO COMMUNITY BENEFIT DISTRICT (CBD) produced the festive CASTRO STREET IMPROVEMENT PROJECT PARTY at the Castro & 18th Streets rainbow crosswalks. The queer community and friends celebrated the completion of the eight month long project (which in reality will be truly completely complete by Thanksgiving). There was great entertainment including Matt Alber, SF Gay Men’s Chorus, Amoray, Gypsy Love, and DJ Liam Shy. A great surprise for everyone was the beautiful 65-foot-long by three feet wide rainbow ribbon created

by Gilbert Baker, original creator of the rainbow flag, specifically for the ribbon-cutting. Supervisor Scott Wiener spoke of the many improvements, including widened sidewalks with a Rainbow Honor Walk of past queer heroes, as well as a History Walk of the Castro - from its early beginnings with Native Americans through the gaying of the district and the start of the AIDS epidemic and first AIDS fundraiser. Other improvements are special LED color themed lighting, new foliage, leaning posts, and bike racks. The supervisor thanked the merchants, residents, and everyone for their patience during this long process of beautification. He thanked CBD Executive Director Andrea Aiello for heading up the project, who thanked the Department of Public Works figureheads and fellow board members and volunteers. First Lady of the Castro Donna Sachet acted as emcee and introduced The Sisters of Per-

petition is followed by a scene of Boaz and Nir checking each other out in the shower. If the film is trying to define how male sexuality and sexual identity is acceptable in some situations but not others, this message is not going to be embraced by queer viewers.

Snails in the Rain builds to its climax when Boaz’ secret admirer forces the object of his affection to confront the reality of their situation. Asking Boaz to flip the kitchen light switch to continue their one-sided correspondence, Mozer tries to build tension—cutting to shots of the clock, or having Boaz excuse himself to get something to eat from the kitchen—to portray Boaz’s struggle with how to respond. The sequence seems forced, and what actually unfolds does not have sufficient payoff. This may be, in part, because Noa identifies the mysterious writer before Boaz does. Of course, Mozer includes a few scenes that reveal more about Boaz and his admirer, but they feel tacked on, rather than organic.

Snails in the Rain isn’t terrible; it’s a passable enough time filler. But it will be more appreciated as a showcase for Reuveni’s hot body than how it depicts gay men.

DECEMBER 8

✵ ✵

✵

✵ ✵ KINKY BOOTS ✵

MARINES MEMORIAL THEATRE

FEATURING: The Broadway Touring Cast of

AND SPECIAL GUESTS

Broadway star

DAVIS GAINES

American Idol, B’ star

LA TOYA LONDON

Broadway/TV star

JAI RODRIGUEZ

TV/Cabaret star

JASON BROCK

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✵ Tickets & Info at www.helpisontheway.org or 415.273.1620 Underwriter After Party at Hotel Adagio

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550 Geary Street, S.F. Sponsored by Celebrity Cruises

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SPONSORED BY:

© 2014 Gary M. Kramer Gary M. Kramer is the author of “Independent Queer Cinema: Reviews and Interviews,” and the co-editor of “Directory of World Cinema: Argentina.” Follow him on Twitter @garymkramer petual Indulgence to give a blessing and make the Castro a continual source of joy for all generations to come. They led the crowd in a litany of joy. The San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus sang “If You Were Gay” from the musical Avenue Q and a special rendition of “Thursday Night in the Castro.” Donna sang the official gay national anthem, “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” and led the audience in a sing-along of the number.

Senator Mark Leno and Mayor Ed Lee gave rousing speeches. Leno said, “Our job is not complete until we find a way to make sure the Castro stays welcoming and affordable for as many people as possible.” Lee joked, “I want to introduce you to another Lee, Final Lee we got this done!” He added, “We must stop these evictions and get truly affordable housing for everyone.” Veteran activist Cleve Jones spoke of the Castro’s history as being basically Gay Central for Progressivism and Activism, and handed a giant scissors for Wiener to cut the giant rainbow ribbon. “Cut it on the seam!” we sew&sews screamed urgently - wanting the ribbon to be salvaged for further use.

BAY AREA LAWYERS FOR INDIVIDUAL FREEDOM (BALIF) is one of the nation’s oldest and largest associations of LGBTQ persons in the field of law. Founded in 1980, BALIF represents its members’ interests in the wider San Francisco Bay Area. BALIF members and supporters include San Francisco Bay Area judges, lawyers, law students, and legal workers. BALIF joined AABA, the Asian American Bar Association of the Greater Bay Area, to co-host a costumed fundraiser (continued on page 30) BAY T IM ES NOVEM BER 13, 2014

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See many more Calendar items @ www.sfbaytimes.com

compiled by Robert Fuggiti

• 13 : T HURSDAY

• 20 : T HURSDAY

Red Hots Burlesque – Neck of the Woods. $10-$20. 8 pm. (406 Clement St.) A captivating burlesque show happening every Thursday night! www.redhotsburlesque.com

Transgender Day of Remembrance – SF LGBT Community Center. Free. 6 pm to 8 pm. (1800 Market St.) A day of remembrance for transgender individuals who have lost their lives due to hatred, prejudice and intolerance. www.tdorsf.org

Karen Mullally – Take 5 Café.

Free. 7:30 pm. (3130 Sacremento St., Berkely) Karen Mullally performs for “3rd Thursday Open Mic.” www.take5cafe.net

Safeway Holiday Ice Rink – Union Square. $10. 10 am to 11:30 pm. (Union Square) Celebrate the holiday season with a skate at the Safeway Holiday Ice Rink. www. unionsquareicerink.com

Tubesteak Connection – Aunt Charlie’s. $4. 10 pm. (133 Turk St.) Dance the night away to great music and a fun crowd at one of the best gay dive bars in town. www.auntcharlieslounge.com

My So Called Night – Beaux.

Free. 9 pm. (2344 Market St.) www. beauxsf.com. Enjoy 2-for-1 drink specials and throwback 90’s music all night long.

• 21 : F RIDAY

• 14 : F RIDAY

Mary Poppins – Berkeley Playhouse. $38. 7 pm. (2640 College Ave., Berkeley) This Tony Awardwinning musical includes a score filled with timeless classics such as “Feed the Birds,” and the Academy Award-winning “Chim-Chim Cheree.” Through December 8. www. berkeleyplahouse.org Merchant On Venice – EnActe Arts. $45. 8 pm. (500 Cast St., Mountain View) Meet the Indian diaspora of Venice Blvd, L.A. in this wickedly funny, wildly inventive and politically provocative re-imagining of Shakespeare’s classic. www. enacte.org The Hot Boxxx Girls Drag Show – Aunt Charlie’s. $5. 10 pm.

(133 Turk St.) An unforgettable drag performance every Friday night. www.auntcharlieslounge.com

True West – Theatre Madcap. $20.

8 pm. (2050 Bryant St.) True West is part tense thriller, part dark comedy by Pulitzer Prize winner and Bay Area legend Sam Shepard. www.theatermadcap.com

Goapele performs at Yoshi’s in Oakland on Friday, November 21.

• 15 : S ATURDAY

Sisterhood and Solidarity – Radical Women. Free. 3 pm. (747 Polk St.) A 5-week discussion group on multi-racial revolutionary feminist organizing. Final meeting November 22. www.radicalwomen. org Oprah: The Life You Want Weekend – SAP Center. $99+. 9 am. (525 W. Santa Clara St., San

Jose) Join the finale experience of Oprah’s The Life You Want Weekend at SAP Center at San Jose. www. oprahweekend.com

pm to 6:30 pm. (1179 N. McDowell Blvd., Petaluma) A positive support group for the LGBTQ community in Petaluma. www.phealthcenter.org

Beatpig – Powerhouse. $5. 9 pm to 2 am. (1347 Folsom St.) A themed party happening on the third Saturday of each month. www.beatbigsf.com

• 18 : T UESDAY

• 16 : S UNDAY

2014 Family Concert – Lake Merritt United Methodist Church Free. 4 pm. (1330 Lakeshore Ave., Oakland) “Betty’s List,” SF Bay Times and the Oakland A’s present the Community Women’s Orchestra 2014 Family Concert. www.communitywomensorchestra.org Glamazone – The Café. Free. 9 pm to 2 am. (2369 Market St.) Enjoy drink specials during the day and drag performances through the evening. www.cafesf.com Sunday’s a Drag Brunch – The Starlight Room. 12 pm to 2:30 pm. (450 Powell St.) Donna Sachet host an elegant brunch with modern dance numbers, classic singing, and hilarious comedy. www.starlightroomsf.com

• 17 : M ONDAY

Up the Ladder – Commonwealth Club. Free for members. (595 Market St.) A panel of three women discuss the experiences that have supported and challenged their career pursuits. www.commonwealthclub.org Beach Blanket Babylon – Club Fugazi. $25-$130. 8 pm. (678 Green St.) Enjoy Steve Silver’s famous musical revue packed with hilarious pop culture and political antics. www.beachblanketbabylon.com LGBTQ Support Group – Petaluma Health Center. Free. 5:30

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BAY TIMES NOVEMB E R 1 3 , 2 0 1 4

Alien She – Yerba Buena Center for the Arts. $10. 12 pm to 6 pm.

(701 Mission St.) Alien She is the first exhibition to examine the impact of Riot Grrrl, a pioneering punk feminist movement from the early 1990s. www.ybca.org An Evening with Seth Rogan and Evan Goldberg – Castro Theatre. $25. 7 pm. (429 Castro St.) Masters of comedy Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg will discuss their careers in an in-depth onstage presentation followed by a screening of their new film, The Interview. www.castrotheatre.com Trivia Night – Hi Tops. Free. 10 pm. (2247 Market St.) Test your trivia knowledge at this popular sports bar. www.hitopssf.com

• 19 : W EDNESDAY

Faye Carol and Her Quartet – Yoshi’s. $25. 8 pm. (510 Embarcadero West, Oakland) This Bay Area living legend remains true to her Mississippi roots, infusing the blues into everything from Cole Porter to Michel Legrand songs. www.yoshis.com Last Drag – SF LGBT Community Center. Free. 7 pm to 9 pm. (1800 Market St.) A free quit smoking class for LGBT and HIV positive people. www.lastdrag.com In Conversation with Andy Cohen – The Castro Theatre. $20-$30. 6 pm. (429 Castro St.) An inside look of the life of one of the most exciting men in show business. www.castrotheatre.com

The Sound of Music – Montgomery Theater. $18. 7 pm.

(271 S. Market St., San Jose) An unforgettable rendition of everyone’s favorite musical. www.cmtsj.org Goapele – Yoshi’s. $30. 8 pm. (510 Embarcadero West, Oakland) Oakland native and former Berklee College of Music student Goapele blends jazz, soul and hip-hop with her own beautiful poetry for a truly unique musical experience. www. yoshis.com

• 22 : S ATURDAY

Beloved Strangers – Un-script Theater. $10-$20. 8 pm. (533 Sutter St.) Beloved Strangers is a completely improvised three-act play celebrating the dynamic of family. www. un-scripted.com Semi-Famous – The Marsh. $20-$35. 8:30 pm. (1062 Valencia St.) With stories from the famous to the infamous, Don Reed returns with his all-new show, one-man show. www.themarsh.org Tree Lighting Celebration – Pier 39. Free. 12 pm. (Pier 39, San Francisco) Pier 39’s majestic 60-foot tree, adorned with glistening ornaments, bows and twinkling lights, will be illuminated against a backdrop of the San Francisco City skyline. www.pier39.com

• 23 : S UNDAY

It’s A Wonderful Life – Broadway West Theatre Company. $25. 1 pm. (4000 Bay St.) The American classic is brought to life by the talented cast of Broadway West Theatre Company. Through December 13. www.broadwaywest.org Oklahoma! – Mountain View Center for the Performing Arts. $22. 1 pm. (500 Castro St.) In this timeless Rodgers and Hammerstein classic, farm girl Laurey and cowboy Curly are on the brink of falling in love. www.mvcpa.com

Andy Cohen in conversation at the Castro Theatre Wednesday the 19th. Faye Carol and Quartet at Yoshi’s Oakland also on the 19th.

Harvey – Lucie Stern Theater. $31-$45. 2 pm. (1305 Middlefield Rd., Palo Alto) Palo Alto Players follows up on its successful season premiere with the hare-raising comedy classic, Harvey. www. paplayers.org

• 24 : M ONDAY

Undocumented and Uninsured – Commonwealth Club. Free. (595 Market St.) A group of panelists discuss how the Affordable Care Act will impact immigrants unable to get health insurance and what the health-care future might hold for them. www. commonwealthclub.org Wanted – Q Bar. Free. 10 pm to 2 am. (456 Castro St.) Enjoy a night of dance and electronic music along with $2 drink specials. www.sfwanted.com

• 25 : T UESDAY

Meow Mix – The Stud. Free. 9 pm. (399 9th St.) A weekly cabaret variety show. www.studsf.com Switch – Q Bar. $5. 10 pm to 2 am. (456 Castro St.) A weekly lesbian dance party. www.qbarsf.com.

Queer Youth Meal Night – SF LGBT Center. Free. 5 pm. (1800 Market St.) Queer Youth Meal Night is a safe space to meet with your trans/queer/ally friends every Tuesday. www.sfcenter.org

California Revels presents

• 26 : W EDNESDAY

Smack Dab Open Mic Night – Magnet. Free. 8 pm. (4122 18th St.) Open mic night hosted by Larry Bob Roberts. www.magnetsf.org

CASTRO

Stay Gold – Public Works. $5. 10 pm to 2 am. (161 Erie St.) Get down on the dance floor with music from resident DJ Pink Lightning and DJ Rapid Fire. www. publicsf.com

ruits f m o r “F s” FARMERS’ MARKET to nut

WEDNESDAYS

Crossroads An American Journey

Celebrate The Solstice with Song, Dance, & Seasonal Merriment Two Weekends: December 12–14 & 19–21, 2014 Ticket prices from just $20. Oakland Scottish Rite Theater Phone 510.452.9334 or order online at www.californiarevels.org

4PM - 8PM

This November at the market: Fifth Crow has delicious Swiss Chard, kale, carrots, squash, onions, and beets!

Rainbow Orchard has the juciest Pink Lady, Gala, and Fuji apples around. They also have apple juice!

November Events: 11/26: Last chance to get some fresh fall produce for Thanksgiving! Impress your family and friends with a dish made of the tastiest locally grown fruits & veggies around!

Market will be open until 12/17!

NOE ST. BETWEEN

MARKET ST. & BEAVER ST. 1.800.949.FARM • pcfma.com/castro

BAY T IM ES NOVEM BER 13, 2014

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ROSTOW (continued from page 23) ever exalts himself or herself in this fashion, even if he or she has won five majors and reached a top ranking.

It’s bad sportsmanship and bad luck.

Indeed, Reed subsequently failed miserably, much to my satisfaction.

Now, the guy is in trouble for cursing to himself after three-putting, calling himself a “fucking faggot’ in clear earshot of the media. My dislike of him is confirmed! Interestingly, I’ve rooted against him ever since he made his egotistical assessment last March, but there was one exception.

Plan your 2015 advertising campaign with the San Francisco Bay Times Request our media kit: publisher@sfbaytimes.com or 415-601-2113

Reed played on the American Ryder Cup team, and I was surprised to find myself pulling for him. Before the contest, I had hoped that Reed would fall apart in front of the world’s cameras. Although I had hoped the U.S. would win, I had assumed that my hostility towards Reed would trump patriotism. But the reverse was true.

This has happened to me before. I think I want a specif ic sports outcome, but during the match I feel my gut urging the opposite. It’s like my reaction to the Sixth Circuit. Why, I wonder, does this truth emerge from

outside my consciousness? How else am I fooling myself? Do I have other beliefs, beliefs not challenged in an arena, that would fall apart if put to a concrete test?

I lack the space to introduce a new topic, but I have just enough leeway to wander off on an unrelated tangent. I was watching Star Trek reruns while falling asleep last night and I noticed a television habit that has always annoyed me. It’s this: some characters go to a bar (or Ten Forward in this case), sit down and order something, and then something happens, they get a phone call or get paged to the bridge, and they get up and leave half their drink. Or sometimes they leave the whole drink!

Who does that? If I had to leave in a hurry, I’d chug my drink first. At the very least, I’d take one last big gulp.

But the characters on TV just take off. Half the time they don’t even pay, and the rest of the time they dump some cash on the bar as if they already know exactly how much they owe. It bugs me. arostow@aol.com

(MARK CHRISTOPHER TRACY continued from page 26) the Grand Prize, a huge jug of shampoo, and told her, “You know, I bet I could use that Halo Shampoo to rinse out that dirty mouth of yours!” Well the place fell apart!

San Francisco Bay Times: Are the two “I Love Lucy” TV episodes represented in your show actual episodes that ran on television, or does the stage version combine fave moments from a bunch of episodes into two entirely “new” shows? When we think of the TV version, for example, so many moments come to mind, such as Lucy and Ethel working at the candy company, Lucy doing the Vitameatavegimin commercial and so much more.

Mark Christopher Tracy: The two shows are actual “I Love Lucy” episodes from the early years of the program. We have added some bits from another episode to enhance the experience, and it all blends seamlessly. The two iconic episodes, “Job

Switching” and “Lucy Does a TV Commercial,” are not presented because they are so iconic! Also, very challenging to present live. The two episodes we do present are chosen because 1) they include all of the Fab Four; 2) have live music from the Tropicana band; 3) employ limited location changes and; 4) do not involve Little Ricky or guest stars. The producers do have the okay to present any of the 179 original episodes, however.

San Francisco Bay Times: We’ve always been a fan of Desi’s music as well. His Cuban beats really rock, even to this day. It sounds like your show includes some of that great music. Do you think that Desi has been under-appreciated by today’s audiences? We usually just think of him as being “Lucy’s husband,” but he was such a huge star in his own right back in the day.

Mark Christopher Tracy: We have a live Tropicana band as part of our show! There is nothing like live

music to enhance and authenticate the “I Love Lucy Live on Stage” experience. In fact, the band was a constant presence during the filming—not the “taping,” since video tape didn’t exist until 1957—of the show at the Desilu Playhouse. Our “Ricky” (Euriamis “EL” Losado) has an amazing singing voice and can dance and play the conga drums like the real thing. Which he is, since he was born in Cuba! Also, to say that Desi was “the brains” of the operation is an understatement.

The TV empire that he and Lucille Ball built that was Desilu was a huge powerhouse in Hollywood, producing some of the most iconic TV shows in history.

San Francisco Bay Times: Have Lucy Arnaz, or other surviving members of their family, seen the show yet? We know that Arnaz is on Broadway now in her own show, “Pippin,” and we’ve enjoyed her work over the years too. If she or others from the family have seen your production, what was their reaction?

And how did you and your colleag ues feel perform ing for them?!

Mark Christopher Tracy: Neither Lucie Arnaz nor her brother have seen our show in any of its incarnations, from the 99-seat Greenway Court Theatre in L.A. back in 2011 through our current national tour. However, several people associated with “I Love Lucy” have seen it and unanimously approve! Gregg Oppenheimer, son of producer Jess Oppenheimer, saw it twice. The last of the original writers (“Four Bobs and a Babe”) 93-year-old Bob Schiller saw it and loved it. Lucy’s personal secretary Wanda Clark saw the show in Fayetteville, Arkansas, last year and loved it. Frank, Lucy’s driver, saw the show and loved it.

Those who were there love it! We consider it a huge privilege to present this American TV icon, and would be thrilled beyond words for either or both of Lucille and Desi’s children to see our show.

San Francisco Bay Times: Have you been to San Francisco before? What are you most looking forward to doing while in SF? Mark Christopher Tracy: I am, in fact, a native San Franciscan, as is my brother and my late mom. I can’t help but hear Tony Bennett’s “I Left My Heart in San Francisco” resonating in my head when I’m there. It was my mom’s favorite song. I’d like to head down to San Mateo and see my old house off the El Camino, and up to Filbert Street to see the place where I was, well, you know, conceived! Absolutely I will head to the BV for some authentic Irish coffee! Will the tree be up at City of Paris? It’ll be great having my SF and Bay Area friends see my show!

Ask anyone: I’m having the time of my life!

“I Love Lucy Live on Stage” runs through November 23 at the Curran Theatre. For tickets and additional information, please go to www.shnsf.com

(SISTER DANA continued from page 27) cocktail party, HALLOWEEN EVE EXTRAVAGANZA, making $17,000 at Drake Lounge for LYRIC. The mission of LYRIC is to build community and inspire positive social change through education enhancement, career trainings, health promotion, and leadership development with LGBTQQ youth, their families, and allies of all races, classes, genders, and abilities.

my faves was the Joan Jett-Blakk for President, sitting on a throne with a fake AK-47 rifle and big drag queen hair, produced in EssEff at the height of militant queer activism in 1992.

Boneberg told me they are currently renegotiating their lease at the Castro museum and are in the middle of a search for new archives space.

UNMASKED was the 29th GLBT HISTORICAL SOCIETY annual fundraiser at the Contemporary Jewish Museum. “Certainly this year’s Gala was among the most memorable and jubilant, as it coincided with San Francisco Giants’ World Series victory, which we live-streamed,” said Historical Society Executive Director Paul Boneberg. “All support enables the GLBT Historical Society to maintain our world-renowned Archives, and to share GLBT history with visitors from around the world at the GLBT History Museum.” Items for auction were truly historical, including posters for “1978 No on 6 Briggs Initiative;” “1975 Harvey Milk for Supervisor;” “the August 14, 1977, Castro Street Fair;” and “June 25, 1978, Gay Freedom Celebration in SF;” also a vintage gelatin silver print of Milk campaigning, and one of

The 6th Annual Project Nunway Charity Fashion Show - PROJECT NUNWAY 666: HERETICS OF FASHION - featuring members of the SAN FRANCISCO SISTERS OF PER PETUA L INDULGENCE, INC. is on Saturday, November 15, at a new location this year - SOMArts Cultural Center, 934 Brannan Street (between 8th & 9th Streets). Doors open at 7pm, show begins at 8pm. The emcees of the show are Sister Roma and Peaches Christ. Judges of Project Nunway include: Jane Wiedlin of The GoGos; Mr. David Glamamore, Couturier to the Stars; Steven LeMay, proprietor of Retro Fit vintage fashions; Sergio Quintana, reporter, Channel 7 News; and Dolin Bliss O’Shea, author of Famous Frocks: The Little Black Dress. Tix: ticketfly.com/purchase/event/654181

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CUMMING UP!

BAY TIMES NOVEMB E R 1 3 , 2 0 1 4

“Everyone has heard the tragic story of Sasha Fleishman, the Oakland transgender teen who suffered severe burns when a hate-motivated teenage prank went terribly wrong,” said Sister Zsa Zsa Glamour, producer of Project Nunway. “Shortly after the incident hit the news, a woman named Alisa Foster contacted the Sisters to request funding to create an authentic Victorian ball gown for Sasha. The Sisters immediately sent a check for $400 to cover the entire cost of the gown.” Alisa Foster, the designer of the gown, and Sasha’s parents will be in attendance.

Sister Zsa Zsa adds, “However, we are happy to report the reason Sasha will not be in attendance is because she is now attending the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. You see, it really does get better!”

ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS (ABFAB) is a live three-part series running at Stage Werx, 446 Valencia Street, Thursday, 8pm and Friday, 11pm, November 13th-14th. France and ISO Tank features Terrence McLaughlin as wacky publicist Edina, ZsaZsa Lufthansa as aging ex-supermodel Patsy, Annie Larson as doddering Gran, Dene Larson as uptight daughter Saffy, and Raya Light as dizzy assistant Bubble. The actors portray

these British loonies to delightful perfection. If you fancy the classic TV AbFab shows, you’ll really dig these live interpretations, sweetiedarling!

Tickets: eventbrite.com/e/absolutelyfabulous-abfab-tickets

America corner) to gather for a salute to his great spirit, wit, compassion, and service to the queer community and beyond.

It’s time to kick off Bear Pride month with Pablito! Pablo Caceres and his delicious “Ice Cream Bears” art is now featured at MAGNET, the Castro & 18th Street health and wellbeing hub for gay and bi men. Caceres’ art has been featured on MTV’s Music Experiment, PQ Monthly, Vancouver Vector, Q Center’s Queer Voices and has appeared in galleries throughout the Portland, Oregon, area. Born in America to Chilean immigrants in 1979, Pablo has been a resident of the Portland metropolitan area for over 20 years. He is known by his friends and within his local art community as “Pablito” - a nickname given to him as a child by his family and what he currently uses to sign his artwork. pablitoart.tumblr.com

Sister Dana sez, “Repugnicans have taken control of the U.S. Senate. The news is bad.

But even on a tough night, we won some important victories, because we progressives worked to get out the vote for campaigns across the country. Jeff Merkley in Oregon and Al Franken in Minnesota won their campaigns for Senate despite facing an overwhelming avalanche of Koch brothers money.

And there was also some genuinely good news.

Maura Healey was elected in Massachusetts, becoming the first-ever openly LGBT state attorney general. She’s fought hard for the LGBT community, and now she’ll be fighting for the whole Commonwealth. And in Idaho, state legislative candidate John McCrostie was victorious, meaning that every state in America now will have at least one LGBT elected official.”

Sadly, SF legend Danny Williams passed in the early hours of November 4th, with his partner Brian Moser and close friends at his side in Maryland. The community was invited to contribute to an impromptu memorial in his honor at 18th & Castro (Bank of

“As Elizabeth Warren said, ‘The bright spots in this election come from candidates who understood that the path to victory is to run hard on a populist progressive economic vision - for fighting and winning across America.’” Sister Dana sez, “Amen!”

Round About - Fall Celebrations Our LGBT Community’s annual Fall Season of special events has had party goers and celebrants excited and busy. Among the occasions documented by SF Bay Times photographers were the World Series Champion San Francisco Giants Parade and Ceremony at City Hall, Halloween parties in the Castro and East Bay, and the annual Unmasked Gala of the GLBT Historical Society.

PHOTO BY SHIRLEY STEWART PHOTO BY STEVEN UNDERHILL

PHOTO BY LESLIE KATZ

PHOTO BY STEVEN UNDERHILL

PHOTO BY SHIRLEY STEWART

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San Francisco Giants Parade and Ceremony

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Halloween Parties

BAY T IM ES NOVEM BER 13, 2014

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GLBT Historical Society Unmasked Gala

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