San Francisco Bay Times - October 17, 2024

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LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area

CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES Est. 1978 October 17–November 6, 2024 http://sfbaytimes.com

October 31 Halloween

Photo by Joel Bullock

Photo courtesy of Sister Roma

Samhain/All Hallow’s Eve

November 1–2

November 3

November 5

Day of the Dead

End of Daylight Savings

Save Ourselves

Turn Back Time 1 hr/2 am

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 31 Kamala Harris’ “Midnight Magic”

HALLOWEEN

https://www.academy-sf.com/event-details/divas-drinks-halloween-edition

ELECTION 2024 About Our Cover Halloween in the Castro and Día de los Muertos in the Mission are annual rites of passage for many of us, but these and other important early fall observances are overshadowed by this year’s elections. From local, state, to national levels, critical decisions must be made that will help shape our lives for years and decades to come.

we will soon be again by lifting restrictions on American Energy Production and terminating the Socialist Green New Deal.”

“Save Ourselves”—mentioned as part of this issue’s cover—is not an exaggerated call to voter action. Consider the first item on the Republican Party platform: Unleash American Energy. “Under President Trump, the U.S. became the Number One Producer of Oil and Natural Gas in the World—and

In a letter to President Biden, some of the world’s leading climate experts, as part of the Union of Concerned Scientists, wrote, “The science shows we must take bold actions now to sharply reduce heat-trapping emissions, limit climate change, and protect public health. As we endeavor to build a

The Democratic Party platform, in contrast, emphasizes the need for “environmental justice,” “conservation,” producing “cleaner, more affordable energy,” and more.

safer, more resilient world, centering the voices and needs of communities disproportionately impacted by environmental and climate injustices is essential.”

Climate change is already having a significant impact on the planet and is expected to worsen in the future. The global cost is in both lives and dollars, with the latter estimated to be between $1.7 trillion and $3.1 trillion per year. The Republican platform is riddled with the phrase “common sense,” and yet “unleashing” unrestricted oil and natural gas defies logic at nearly every turn. (continued on page 18)

You Are They/Them: Election 2024

SARAH MCBRIDE/TWITTER

PHOTO BY RINK

OFFICIAL WHITE HOUSE PHOTO BY LAWRENCE JACKSON

wide now describe themtiatives in 11 key states in an effort to turn out selves as transgender or as their vote in the 2004 questioning their gender Bush-Kerry election, identity (3.3 percent transand the Bush camgender and 2.2 percent paign advocated for a questioning). federal constitutional We were tremendously amendment banning heartened by those nummarriage for bers. The fact that so many LGBTIQ couples high school students had nationwide. Signifithe self-awareness and cantly, data later understanding of gender demonstrated that 6/26 and Beyond fluidity as well as the confitheir efforts were comdence and courage to pletely ineffective in reveal their inner feelings to Stuart Gaffney and John Lewis increasing Republican a federal government agenturnout. For over 40 cy incredibly inspires us. years, from Anita Vice President Kamala Harris welcomed the cast and creators of Queer Eye for the Straight As Election Day 2024 draws ever closer, we The data reveal a flowering Bryant’s “Save the Guy to The White House on June 13, 2024. were deeply disturbed to read in major news of our movement as Children” campaigns wearing a white dress in an attempt to vilioutlets last week how the campaigns of Donincreasing numbers of young people move and the notorious Briggs Initiative of the fy trans people. ald Trump and other Republicans are pour1970s to the Proposition 8 campaign in beyond the strictures of the traditional ing millions of dollars into vicious anti-trans On the same day 2008, conservative political forces have gender binary to express and live as themadvertisements that grossly misrepresent the of the New York attacked and demeaned LGBTIQ people selves—even in the face of the conservatruth of the lives of transgender people and Times story, major in stigmatizing political advertisements. tive, Republican, queerphobic onslaught. exploit potential swing voters’ latent transmedia outlets also phobia. A New York Times We know where Vice PresiAnother bright rainbow in the CDC data ran another major headline read: “Trump and dent Harris and the is that over 20 percent of cisgender high transgender news Republicans Bet Big on Biden-Harris administration school students identified their sexual oristory about the first Anti-Trans Ads Across the stand on LGBTIQ issues. entation as either LGB or questioning, or nationally representative study of transCountry.” The Times story This summer while Biden described their sexuality in some other way gender and gender questioning youth by reported that a Trump ad was still at the top of the than heterosexual. Despite all the challengthe Centers for Disease Control (CDC). often aired during NFL and ticket, Harris invited the cast The study extensively documents the detri- es that being queer can still entail, more college football games ends members of the immensely and more queer high mental effects that queerwith the callous and cynical popular television show Queer phobia and misinformation, school students—now 1 in tagline: “Kamala is for Eye for the Straight Guy to the 5 students—are choosing such as that disseminated in they/them. President White House to celebrate the Republican political ads, to be themselves on their Trump is for you.” the twentieth anniversary of have on gender nonconown terms. the show’s premiere, which San Francisco District Attorney forming young people. It “Same old playbook,” as And returning to politics, coincided with the twentieth Kamala Harris and political describes “disparate health Vice President Harris another bright rainbow— anniversary of the first consultant Jim Rivaldo (2006) described Trump’s blatantoutcomes and challenges in with radiant pink and blue queer marriages in San ly racist attacks on her, aptly characterizes school, including violence Francisco. In their White House conversahues—is that queer this year’s Republican deluge of anti-trans and discrimination” that tion, which took place four months before history is virtually certain ads that attempt to ostracize gender nonconthese queer youth face, comelection day, Harris recounted how her to be made on November forming members of our community as the pared to their cisgender first campaign manager was the legendary 5th with the election of “other.” These cruel ads, which Republicans counterparts.

Vice President Kamala Harris with Jim Rivaldo, Harvey Milk’s political conthe first transgender are employing in the presidential race as well Delaware State Senator Sarah sultant, and how she embraced Rivaldo’s However, as we examined person to the United McBride as in key swing Senate contests such as Ohio understanding of the LGBTIQ movement the data tables in the CDC States Congress. and Montana, are unfortunately all too “as a collective fight for freedom and for survey, we discovered rainbows amidst the Democratic Delaware State Senator Sarah familiar to LGBTIQ people. justice.” Sadly, a divisive Republican attack dark clouds in the data. The first was the McBride, who is transgender, holds a now uses an image of Harris joyfully greet- fact that the CDC found that an amazing For example, Republicans twenty years ago ing the Queer Eye star Jonathan Van Ness (continued on page 20) advanced anti-marriage equality ballot ini5.5 percent of high school students nationS AN F RANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

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ELECTION 2024 Spread the Word I once accidentally started a group conversation on the 22 Fillmore bus, simply by wearing a button for a local candidate. Someone asked about the candidate, and why they had earned my vote. As I talked to this person, others on the bus started listening, and asking more questions. By the end of the ride, I believe I had convinced at least 8 voters to vote for my chosen candidate. Wear the button, wear the t-shirt, talk about your values; you can be a walking reminder to vote, and to care.

Spread the Word, but the Right Word

In Case You Missed It Joanie Juster As we race headlong toward what is generally considered to be the most consequential election of our lifetime, it is clear that voter turnout is going to be the key to success. We cannot afford to leave any voters on the sidelines, whether from lack of access to a polling place, confusion about their registration, apathy, or indecision. Our job: get out the vote.

The one piece of advice you’ll hear over and over again is that the very best way to get people to the polls is to have a conversation with them. Many of us are a bit shy about phone banking or door knocking, but there are other ways to engage potential voters.

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Among the many troubling aspects of this current political climate is the all-out war on truth being waged by those who are hellbent on sowing chaos among the American people. How do they do this? By drowning us in a tsunami of disinformation—and repeating the lies over and over until we doubt everything we thought we knew.

This isn’t just a prank: this is a well-funded, coordinated effort to destabilize our democracy by creating confusion and doubt among the American people. Candidates and elected officials are proudly spreading blatant lies about immigrants eating pets, or what the federal government is doing to provide relief in disaster-stricken areas, or even proclaiming, “They control the weather!” And, sadly, many Americans are believing them. So, when these same candidates and elected offi-

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cials staunchly assert that election systems cannot be trusted, they cast doubt upon the integrity of the very election system upon which our country depends. The result? Election workers across the country are being targeted with death threats.

Many are quitting the field out of fear for their safety. And that makes it harder to run accurate, fair elections.

These lies have very human consequences. Haitian immigrants in Ohio found themselves targeted after Donald Trump and J.D. Vance repeatedly and falsely accused them of eating pet cats and dogs.

Disinformation being spread about FEMA relief efforts in areas severely impacted by Hurricanes Helene and Milton is making the already-challenging relief efforts even harder, putting lives and property at risk.

What can you and I do in the face of all these lies? To quote historian Heather Cox Richardson, “We need to blanket the country with good information.” I Googled “how to counter disinformation,” and found many great articles from government agencies, thinktanks, nonprofits, universities, and professional organizations. It is worth reading several of them, but I can boil down some of their advice for you.

While we can’t all be professional fact-checkers, we can do our level best to verify information before we share it. Make sure that

when you talk about issues, you get your facts and figures right. “I saw something on Facebook ... ” is a dangerous path to go down; that’s how the lies about Springfield got started. Seek out trusted sources of information, and spread information you know to be true. Report false information you find on social media. And, most of all, be intentional and thoughtful about what you share on social media. Don’t amplify the bad actors; be the voice that others look to for truth and stability.

Not all wars are fought with guns. We can all help fight against disinformation campaigns.

It is our right, and our responsibility.

Hope in Unexpected Places My day job includes tabling at community events and health fairs around the Bay Area.

One of the benefits is that I get to meet (continued on page 18)

ELECTION 2024 Our Democracy Is on the Ballot in San Francisco

By Marie Jobling As a nonprofit leader and long-time advocate for aging and disability rights in San Francisco, I know how important it is for our diverse communities to have a place at the table in shaping policy and funding decisions. San Francisco’s strength in creating innovative programs and policies has grown out of dedicated leadership representing the LBGTQ+ and other communities.

It is a well-known fact that San Francisco’s bureaucracy is in need of reform. Currently, our system of government is often an obstacle in and of itself to innovation, failing to keep up with the needs of its citizens. But this system of government includes commissions, advisory councils, and oversight committees that do give residents a formal role in improving city services and providing effective oversight and accountability. Ideally, affording San Franciscans the opportunity to collaborate with legislators and city officials empowers us to create a city that serves us all.

This November, two ballot measures—Prop D and Prop E—offer contrasting visions of how to reform this system. Both aim to cut

through the red tape that hinders city governance; one vision, Prop D, takes a reactive strategy while the other, Prop E, is an organic, intentional approach. Prop D would reduce the access that citizens have in contributing to our democracy. On the other hand, Prop E would preserve the aspects of our system of government that works to serve us all.

Let’s start with Prop D. Backed by billionaire interests, this measure seeks to drastically reduce the number of city commissions from around 130 to a maximum of 65. It would also take away all decision-making authority from commissions and make their roles purely advisory. Critical commissions that ensure oversight and accountability—like the Health Commission, the Commission on the Status of Women, the Human Rights Commission, the Library Commission, and the Immigrant Rights Commission—would be eliminated.

Under Prop D, the Police Oversight Commission would be disbanded, putting police conduct decisions in the sole hands of the police chief. In light of recent national and local events, we cannot afford to weaken civilian oversight of our police force.

I was part of the coalition that helped pass the Dignity Fund, which secured vital fund-

ing for senior and disability services. Embedded in that legislation is an oversight committee, created to ensure transparency and accountability. Prop D would eliminate this committee, dismantling a key safeguard to assure for vulnerable communities.

Prop D would also give the mayor the power to appoint two-thirds of all commission members without the Board of Supervisors’ approval. The Board would get one-third of the appointees. The current system, where the Board of Supervisors can co-nominate and approve members, has helped make the commissions more diverse. For instance, 19% of current commissioners are LGBTQ+.

The proponents of Prop D claim that external research supports their proposal. However, the outside organizations that did the research did not have full access to the city’s internal workings, nor did they demonstrate that they understood the importance of the commissions they seek to eliminate. They also misrepresented what the research really showed. Without this context, their recommendations lack the insight needed to support such sweeping changes.

Now, let’s talk about Prop E. Prop E advocates for a thoughtful, structured approach to reforming city commissions.

It calls for the creation of a Streamlining Task Force that will hold public hearings and engage with the community to propose changes. The task force will include diverse voices, from city administrators to public sector labor representa-

tives, and will be tasked with carefully evaluating which commissions should be restructured or consolidated.

The beauty of Prop E is its transparency and inclusivity. The task force will present its findings to voters in 2026, allowing us to have the final say on any recommended changes. This two-step process ensures that any reform is not only well-considered but also accountable to the public—a model that has worked before, when San Francisco last updated its charter in 1995.

At the heart of Prop E is a recognition that while reform is needed, we must do it in a way that preserves the checks and balances, accountability, and citizen oversight that, make our government more responsive and equitable. Prop E offers a path to a more efficient city government without sacrificing the voices of our diverse communities.

In short, Prop E is the reasonable solution San Francisco needs to address the issue in a way that is fair and democratic. Prop D threatens to undermine the very systems designed to hold our city accountable. This November, the choice is clear: vote Yes on Prop E, and No on Prop D. Marie Jobling is the Founder and Co-Executive Director of the Community Living Campaign, a nonprofit that advocates for seniors and people with disabilities. She is also Co-Chair of the Dignity Fund Coalition, which passed a charter amendment to increase funding for senior and disability services in San Francisco.

Dr. Marcy Adelman oversees the Aging in Community column.

For her summary of current LGBT senior challenges and opportunities, please go to: http://sf baytimes.com/challenges-and-opportunties/

Alegre Home Care is proud to support Dr. Marcy Adelman’s Aging in Community column in the San Francisco Bay Times.

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Unlocking Your Money Motivation of the “financial vortex,” a term they used to describe the challenge of saving for retirement while juggling competing financial priorities. They wanted to understand why some people are naturally better retirement savers. Why do some people choose not to prioritize retirement savings? The findings boil down to discovering your money motivators. By identifying these traits, we can help clients recalibrate their thinking as needed.

Choosing the Right Trustee: Why a Professional Might Be the Best Choice The Role and Responsibilities of a Trustee

What Is Your Money Motivation?

Money Matters Brandon Miller As a financial advisor, my actual job is to help folks save for retirement along with all of their other life goals. Perhaps surprisingly, much of what we really do isn’t about crunching numbers. Instead, it involves the emotional and behavioral aspects of not only saving, but also living.

It’s Complicated Is that your relationship status with money?

It is for many of us. To better understand the realities of preparing for and living in retirement, Goldman Sachs developed key questions to analyze four behavioral characteristics in a recent survey: optimism, future orientation, risk versus reward focus, and financial literacy.

Do you have high optimism or low optimism?

According to Goldman, those individuals with high optimism more often take proactive actions with savings, such as setting up personalized financial plans, and actively changing investments in a volatile market.

For someone more skeptical about saving, sharing historical stock market returns over the long term, for example, may be helpful.

Which leads us to ...

Do you look to the future beyond instant gratification?

According to the study, those with a future orientation tend to have good savings behavior, and are typically more financially prepared for retirement. If someone is more focused on today than tomorrow, we may spend more time demonstrating why good decisions today can assist them and their loved ones in the future. In short, the tradeoffs will be worth it. Long-term

Goldman focused on exploring the concept

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(continued on page 20)

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Trust Essentials Jay Greene, Esq., CPA Estate planning is a thoughtful and necessary process to ensure that your assets are distributed according to your wishes after you’re gone. One of the most critical decisions you’ll make in this process is choosing a trustee to administer your trust. The trustee’s role is pivotal, as they are responsible for managing, protecting, and distributing the trust’s assets in accordance with your instructions.

Understanding the trustee’s responsibilities and the impact they have on the administration of a trust is crucial in making the right choice.

A trustee’s primary duty is to manage the assets placed in a trust, ensuring that they are used and distributed according to the terms set out in the trust document. This role requires a significant amount of responsibility, as trustees must do all of the following.

• Administer the trust. This includes managing the trust assets, which can range from investments and real estate to personal property. The trustee must ensure that these assets are protected and grow in value, depending on the trust’s objectives. In the Bay Area, where property values are notoriously high, managing real estate assets effectively is crucial. The trustee must ensure that these assets are protected and grow in value, depending on the trust’s objectives.

• Follow the trust’s instructions. The trustee must carry out the grantor’s wishes as specified in the trust. This includes making distributions to beneficiaries according to the schedule and terms laid out in the trust document.

• Engage in fiduciary duties. Trustees have a legal obligation to act in the best interests of the beneficiaries. This includes making prudent investment decisions, avoiding conflicts of interest, and managing the trust’s assets with care and loyalty. (continued on page 20)

Message from Leadership

Diversity on Boards

By Nancy Geenen, M.A. Ed., J.D. Whether or not legislation is with us, there is a growing demand for boards to diversify. Publicly traded, family, privately held, and nonprofit boards all benefit from electing directors with diverse identities. That said, it is not only the identity that needs to be recognized. With the attacks on DEI (diversity, equity, and inclusion), nominating and governing committees may shy away from a “numbers game.” And they should. One is never enough. The key to great decision-making is the diversity of many lived experiences, both personal and professional.

Since 2015, global management consulting firm McKinsey & Company has been researching the effect diversity has on financial performance. Surveying more than 10,000 publicly traded companies over the years, McKinsey found that those in the top quartile outperformed their industry competitors by over 30% year after year.

This research led to an explosion in training courses for board readiness. In some cases, nominating committees have used this lack of formal training as an excuse not to diversify.

Great boards not only look for diversity in lived experiences, but also these boards require a matrix of skill sets from those will-

GGBA Member Spotlight As the Vice President Banking Advisor of PNC Private Bank as well as being PNC’s Regional Diversity & Inclusion Council Chair, Aaron Boot-Haury has a busy schedule delivering insightful banking solutions to clients. The GGBA was therefore grateful when he expressed interest in joining the association’s leadership and was elected as a member of the board. This feature is the first in a series that profiles GGBA board members.

GGBA: Why did you decide to join the GGBA, and how long have you been a member?

ing to roll up their sleeves and do the work.

A nonprofit board, like the GGBA, is a great place to build board experience.

The GGBA is a working board that requires a leader in development and sponsorship to raise funds, a leader in finance for proper expenditure of funds and budgeting, a leader in programing for membership that focuses on member needs, and a leader in nominations and governance to assure a multi-year succession plan and adherence to fiduciary duties. As a board, we are service oriented and ready to roll up our sleeves to do the good work for our members and the LGBTQ+ community.

In September, the GGBA membership elected five new board members with 30% of the membership voting. Aaron Boot-Haury, Tali Bray, Hitesh Tolani, Lisa Orrell, and Stella Lim join Gina Grahame, David Aguilar, Imani Brown, Josh Nair, and me as the board that will serve our stakeholders. Over the next several issues, the San Francisco Bay Times will be featuring our newest board members.

Nancy Geenen is the Acting President of the Golden Gate Business Association. She is also the Principal and Chief Executive Officer at Flexibility https://www.flexability.com/

Aaron Boot-Haury of PNC

Aaron Boot-Haury: When I moved to San Francisco in June of 2023, finding the LGBTQ+ Chamber of Commerce was one of the first things I looked up to start developing a network! While living in metro Detroit, PNC Bank was very active in the local LGBTQ+ chamber, and I was able to use that relationship to make a lot of connections, friends, and create business opportunities for myself. Once I found the GGBA, I immediately started attending the monthly Make Contact events and have met some great people. As I got to know more of the board members and the history of the organization, I quickly realized I’d like to be involved in helping lead the next generation of GGBA through board service.

GGBA: What sparked your move to the Bay Area from Michigan?

Aaron Boot-Haury: Many reasons! My husband finished his doctorate in clinical psychology last spring, and while researching post-doctorate fellowships and research positions, it became quite clear California had the most opportunities for him given that his area of expertise is in LGBTQ+ mental health. Oddly enough, we had just visited San Francisco, Los Angeles, and San Diego in the few years prior (and loved all three!), and my bank was also expanding west at the same time, so we took that as a sign and went “all-in” on California!

The better weather, a political environment that better mirrored our values, and natural beauty were added bonuses.

GGBA: Please explain your role at PNC.

PNC SVP and Chief Diversity Officer Gina Coleman presented the bank’s Advocate of the Year Award to Aaron Boot-Haury.

Aaron Boot-Haury: After

Photos courtesy of Aaron Boot-Haury

spending many years as a branch manager in PNC’s Retail Bank, I made the transition to our Private Bank with my move to California. In my role as a Banking Advisor, I provide credit and cash management solutions to our high-networth and ultra-high net worth clients to recommend and implement the best options for liquidity as part of an overall wealth strategy. Each client in our Private Bank is surrounded by a team of specialists who all work collaboratively to help Aaron Boot-Haury and his husband Jared Boot-Haury, Psy.D., M.B.A., at families achieve their goals.

Stern Grove Many of our most complex cliof the Year award for 2023, the top individents are business owners, as they have so ual honor, at our Annual D&I Conference many more considerations for planning than earlier this year. the average individual. Outside of my day job, I’m active in many different Diversity & GGBA: PNC is relatively new to the Inclusion activities within PNC. West Coast. Please share more about the bank.

GGBA: Can you tell us a bit more Aaron Boot-Haury: PNC is one of the about the Diversity & Inclusion work largest banks in the country, offering a broad you’ve done with PNC? scope of national capabilities delivered by a Aaron Boot-Haury: PNC has a lot of local team that lives and works here in the great Diversity & Inclusion programs, Bay Area and across Northern California. including 13 different Employee Business PNC officially entered the market three Resource Groups (EBRGs) with one third of years ago through our acquisition of BBVA employees participating in at least one. I was USA in the fall of 2021, and while the full the treasurer of our Southeast Michigan breadth of PNC’s capabilities has only been PNC Proud chapter for two years and then available in California for a short time, our served as president for two years. For the mortgage and corporate lines of businesses past two years, I’ve served as an EBRG have been servicing communities across the Advisory Council member, representing all state for decades, fostering lasting relation15 of our Proud chapters. Soon after joining ships that have enabled us to establish strong, the Northern California market, I co-foundenduring roots. Since expanding our footprint ed and currently chair our Regional in California, we’ve had the privilege to work Diversity & Inclusion Council, which works with organizations and clients that uplift and with our Regional President and business serve the community while acting as a trusted group leaders to support the market’s strateadvisor that helps them navigate their finangy through the diverse and unique lens of cial journeys. our employees, customers, and communities. (continued on page 15) I was honored to win PNC’s D&I Advocate S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

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Take Me Home With You! Adventurous, Smart, and Loyal Laney

Meet Laney, the adventurous lady who is ready to explore the world and meet new people and dogs along the way.

Full of enthusiasm and zest for life, Laney has been mastering her self-care skills by learning to take breaks and settle down after her exciting escapades. She’s a strong, independent gal who knows how to enjoy a good adventure, but also how to relax and recharge.

Laney’s bubbly personality, combined with her smarts and loyalty, makes her a gem of a dog. If you’re looking for an adventurous yet loving companion, Laney could be the one!

https://www.sfspca.org/adoptions/

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Bumble

Laney

Recently, Laney spent time in foster care, where she was an absolute pleasure. She loved her trip to the beach, rode calmly in the car, and got along famously with the resident dogs, even enjoying snuggles with them at night. Loyal and active, Laney is the perfect companion for someone who enjoys outdoor adventures, but also appreciates cozy snuggle time on the couch.

Not sure yet? Try the foster-to-adopt program! Take Laney home for a one-week trial with the option to adopt her at the end. If it’s not a match, she can return to the shelter. Visit us or contact adoptions@sfspca.org to meet this wonderful dog!

Laney is waiting for you at the SF SPCA’s Mission Campus, 201 Alabama Street. We’re open Wednesday to Sunday, 11 am–6 pm, and Tuesday, 1 pm–6 pm (closed Mondays).

Let’s Go Home!

Here are two of the many pets now available for adoption at Oakland Animal Services (OAS): Bumble Meet Bumble, a fun-loving, energetic pup ready to bring joy to your life! She’s a medium-energy dog who loves to play, especially with other dogs. Bumble is full of happy wiggles and excitement, making her the perfect companion for an active household. She’s working on her leash manners but is eager to learn and would thrive with a doggie mentor. If you’re looking for a playful, affectionate pup who will keep you smiling, Bumble is your girl!

Ash

Ash Meet Ash, a sweet and gentle 4-pound bunny who loves quiet time and gentle petting. Curious yet calm, he is the perfect companion for anyone seeking a peaceful, affectionate rabbit.

The OAS adoption process focuses on matching you with a pet who is a good fit for you and your family.

Come by during open adoption hours Thursdays 12–7 pm and Fridays/Saturdays/ Sundays 12–3 pm to adopt your new best friend, or to learn more about the OAS adoption process. Please see the OAS website to learn more about how you can help by adopting, fostering, volunteering, and donating: www.oaklandanimalservices.org

GLBT Fortnight in Review Roland Schembari and Bill Hartman, Co-Founders Randy Alfred, Founding News Editor, 1978 Kim Corsaro, Publisher 1981-2011

2261 Market Street, No. 309 San Francisco CA 94114 Phone: 415-601-2113 525 Bellevue Avenue Oakland CA 94610 E-mail: editor@sfbaytimes.com www.sfbaytimes.com The Bay Times was the first newspaper in California, and among the first in the world, to be jointly and equally produced by lesbians and gay men. We honor our history and the paper’s ability to build and strengthen unity in our community.

The Bay Times is proud to be the first and only LGBTQ newspaper in San Francisco to be named a Legacy Business, recognizing that it is a longstanding, community-serving business that is a valuable cultural asset to the city.

Dr. Betty L. Sullivan/Jennifer L. Viegas Co-Publishers & Co-Editors

Beth Greene, John Signer, Michael Delgado Design & Production

Kate Laws Business Manager Blake Dillon Calendar Editor Kit Kennedy Poet-In-Residence J.H. Herren Technology Director Carla Ramos Web Coordinator Mario Ordonez Distribution Juan R. Davila Volunteer Coordinator

Tough Times!

I am so nervous and anxious these days. Do you know those chambers in science fiction movies that people use for lengthy space flights? I’d like to get into one for the next three or four weeks. When I emerge, I want a thoughtful clinician to be waiting for me to regain consciousness. He or she will either give me the good news. We won! Or provide me with a powerful fun narcotic of some sort. What are the kids using these days? Special K? Or was that last decade?

I’ve stopped trying to understand what half my fellow Americans are seeing in this unhinged wannabe tyrant. As I write this morning, I am learning about the half-hour Trump spent swaying and “bopping” to music instead of answering questions at a so-called town hall last night. The audience loved it. Meanwhile, Harris can give a five-minute rundown of some intricate middle class tax incentive and she’ll still be accused of avoiding policy details.

Anyway, I can’t stand it. I was praying for Harris to develop a huge comforting lead in the polls by this point in time, securing the Blue Wall and challenging in those other swing states. Instead, we’re faced with a dead heat, and the definite possibility of a disastrous Trump restoration. I feel as if I’m in a rickety bus on a mountain road being driven by a chimpanzee. The good news is that the chimp has made the drive many times, we don’t have far to go, and we are

CONTRIBUTORS Writers Rink, Sister Dana Van Iquity, Ann Rostow, Patrick Carney, Leslie Sbrocco, Kate Kendell, Gary M. Kramer, Joanie Juster, Robert Holgate, Eduardo Morales, Dennis McMillan, Tim Seelig, John Chen, Rafael Mandelman, Jewelle Gomez, Phil Ting, Rebecca Kaplan, Philip Ruth, Bill Lipsky, Elisa Quinzi, Liam Mayclem, Donna Sachet, Gary Virginia, Derek Barnes, Marcy Adelman, Jan Wahl, Stuart Gaffney & John Lewis, Brandon Miller, Jamie Leno Zimron, Howard Steiermann, Fernando Camino, Honey Mahogany, David Landis

By Ann Rostow

headed for a scenic lodge with beautiful views and a cellar full of champagne. The bad news is that the right side of the road falls off a five-hundred-foot cliff and one of the passengers is distracting the chimp with a beach ball while he drives.

I must also tell you that I feel somewhat derelict as a human being to have blown off the many problems of our violent world as I focus a) on the election and b) on my own personal whims. That seems to be the extent of my bandwidth, which leaves no room to worry about horrible violence in the Middle East and war in Ukraine. With that in mind, I was almost reluctant to read Nicholas Kristof ’s recent piece in The New York Times, which I understood from the headline was about ongoing murder and famine in the South Sudan.

It’s not simply that I didn’t have the mental space to worry about Darfur. It’s that I didn’t have the mental space to feel guilty about not worrying about Darfur. And by “worrying,” I don’t mean taking action. The only thing I do about any of these tragedies is shake my head ruefully and make comments to my friends. As for Darfur, I thought that was a showdown between warlords from years ago, but the situation (I learn from Kristof) is more of a disaster now than ever—a toxic stew of political chaos and cruelty.

I guess my own problems are First World, as they say. And I’m not even mentioning my

worrisome concerns over college football and the Chiefs.

Ad Hoc Before I go further, can I ask what the story is with “Blue Chew,” an erectile disfunction gummy that has flooded the airwaves with commercials over the last month or so? The product, as you may have seen for yourself, is pitched by the type of buxom young women we used to see in the Playboy centerfold back in the day. The girls give us a knowing wink and tell us to let our guys know the secret, or something like that, which makes me wonder: Why would the young men who presumably are hooking up with these traditionally attractive women have erectile disfunction?

I imagine ED can hit guys of all ages, but still. Wouldn’t it be difficult to seduce someone of this ilk if you can’t sustain an erection? Perhaps these spokeswomen are all going out with aging Sugar Daddies.

And who decided, not just to advertise, but to mount a zillion dollar nonstop promotional campaign on every football game on every channel in every time slot? I, for one, am getting sick of Blue Chew and suspicious of its sexpot cheerleaders. So, ad guys? You can tell your corporate bosses that the Baby Boomer lesbians are not buying what you’re selling.

Speaking of ads, the Million Moms from the American Family Association are annoyed with the Keebler elves, who were riding along when a parent missed her child’s school bus. “Awww ... ,” the mother is about to use the “f word” when an elf asks, “Fudge?”

That, the Moms say, is “insinuated profanity,” by implication a bad thing, particularly when the kids are watching! “Everyone knows children repeat what they hear, particularly when a young person is the one speaking in the ad. Typically, young actors attract young viewers,” the Moms warned.

But doesn’t that mean the kids will all be saying “fudge?” I just don’t get these people, and I also thought that a “profanity” was by implication sacrilegious. I checked, and although “profane” means secular and is tied to religion, a “profanity” is apparently any old bad word. I don’t believe this, because I think the roots of words matter a great deal, as do their true definitions.

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“Bombastic,” for example, means pretentious or verbose, not loud. “Enormity” is a gross evil, not a large thing. “Mano a mano” means “hand to hand,” not “man to man.”

And a profanity should refer to a religious curse, not a swear word, and certainly not a cookie variety recommended by a cartoon elf. That said, the point of language is to convey meaning, so if 90 percent of people think “bombast” is loud obnoxious ranting, there’s an argument to be made that using the word in that context is not a mistake.

Circulation is verified by an independent agency. Reprints by permission only.

CALENDAR Submit events for consideration by e-mail to: calendar@sfbaytimes.com

I think I disagree, but I can see both sides.

© 2024 Bay Times Media Company Co-owned by Betty L. Sullivan & Jennifer L. Viegas

Lost in Litigation I’ve somewhat lost track of many lawsuits weaving through the appellate courts, but then again, we’ve just finished the summer (continued on page 18)

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Prop D ads erase women and people of color from government: https://tinyurl.com/2nv3rj72 GGBA (continued from pg 11) GGBA: How does PNC support diverse segments like the LGBTQ+ community?

Aaron Boot-Haury: PNC’s Diversity & Inclusion strategy drives an investment in the diversity of our workforce, enrichment of our workplace culture, and growth of our customers and communities in order to succeed in the marketplace. We strive to foster a culture of inclusion in which all employees and customers feel welcomed, valued, and respected. We recognize our impact extends beyond our workforce, and so we commit to building the kind of belonging that not only deepens the connections we have to each other but also strengthens our communities.

GGBA: You mentioned going to the GGBA monthly Make Contact networking events. Have they benefited you and your business, and would you recommend them to others?

Aaron Boot-Haury: Absolutely! In addition to just meeting some great people and getting to know the community, I’ve met folks interested in having conversations about how PNC can help them. Additionally, I’ve been able to support several GGBA members, both personally and on behalf of PNC, by using them for various services. Making connections to help our members grow their business is one of the main missions of GGBA and it is exciting to take part in those efforts.

GGBA: What do you hope to bring to the GGBA as a new board member?

Aaron Boot-Haury: First and foremost, as treasurer I hope to utilize my finance skills to help the board make prudent, data-driven decisions on how to use our resources in support of GGBA’s mission. As someone who is not a business owner but instead works for a large corporation and has insight into that world, I also hope to help the GGBA forge increased and stronger partnerships with major companies that have operations in San Francisco.

GGBA: Is there anything else that you would like to share?

Aaron Boot-Haury: One final thing I’d like to highlight is that PNC has a robust Supplier Diversity program, and we are committed to including diverse suppliers in our sourcing processes. I’d encourage GGBA members to register for our program to be considered when procurement opportunities arise! https://pnc.co/3Uay2U2 S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

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PRC Mighty Real Gala 2024

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On Friday, October 4, 2024, PRC’s annual Mighty Real fundraiser brought a night of celebration, compassion, and community to The Pearl, a popular event venue in San Francisco. The theme was “Imagine, Inspire, Act,” and more than $200.000 was raised, thanks to supporters and guests who believe strongly in the importance of PRC’s life-changing programs and services.

Guests for the sold-out event, which began with a rooftop reception, dressed fabulously to reflect their “Mighty Real” selves. Featured speakers included Master of Ceremonies Jon Moscone, Hostess Extraordinaire Donna Sachet, Mayor London Breed, Senator Scott Wiener, and PRC CEO Chuan Teng.

Awardees included Steven Ames Brown, who received the Sylvester Community Pillar Award for his tireless efforts to ensure that Sylvester’s and other artists’ royalties continue benefiting PRC and other nonprofits.

Dr. Monica Gandhi was honored with the Vanguard Leadership Award for her pioneering contributions to HIV/AIDS medical advancements and her leadership as the Medical Director of Ward 86, one of the first dedicated HIV clinics in the U.S. The Outstanding Corporate Partnership Award went to Marsh McLennan Agency, which has been a close partner to PRC, working alongside the nonprofit’s People Experience team to provide staff with the best benefits.

The night ended with guests dancing to tunes from DJ Adrian Loving, celebrating an evening of philanthropy and impact. The San Francisco Bay Times extends congratulations to the staff, volunteers, supporters, and friends of PRC on another memorable and successful Mighty Real gala.

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an Francisco’s season of annual galas continued with PRC’S Mighty Real; Imagine, Inspire, Act at The Pearl on Friday, October 4. This was a brand-new venue for most of us and served PRC’s purposes beautifully, offering a roof-top deck for cocktail hour and sprawling, and high-ceiling space for the seated dinner and program. Guests were dressed elegantly and bustled with excitement, including Reigning Empress Linda Summers, PRC Advisory Board member Gary Virginia, Brio Financial’s Brandon Miller, AT&T’s Cammy Blackstone, SF AIDS Foundation’s Tyler Termeer, SF Pride’s Suzanne Ford and Nguyen Pham, and Supervisor Rafael Mandelman.

The program, emceed by Jon Moscone, featured short speeches from Mayor London Breed and State Senator Scott Wiener and focused on three awards. Steve Ames Brown received the Sylvester Community Pillar Award, sharing fascinating personal stories about the musical artist with whom he worked and who so generously gifted his music royalties to PRC. Monica Gandhi received the Vanguard Leadership Award and spoke powerfully of her leadership role in fighting not just AIDS, but also the painful shame often attached to a diagnosis and her determination to reverse this misplaced stigma. The Marsh & McLennan Agency that provides PRC’S employee health benefits received the Outstanding Corporate Partner Award.

A rousing auction raised thousands of dollars, including a Fund-a-Need portion that had paddles waving in all directions; this was a generous crowd. If anyone was not yet familiar with the CEO of PRC, Chuan Teng, her compassionate address firmly established her extraordinary leadership role and commitment to PRC’s vital work. Finally, we heard from Basil Martinez, who has benefited from several of the programs of PRC and who shared an amazing story of self-realization, recovery, and eventual employment at PRC. This year’s Mighty Real firmly cemented PRC’s gala as a must-attend fall event.

The following night we were joined by returning San Franciscan Michael Timineri at the Horizons Foundation’s Gala at the Academy of Sciences. What a delightful setting for a gala! We hobnobbed in the Grand Hall with other guests, including the Community Center’s Rebecca Rolfe, Nas Mohammed, and others and in the Piazza for dinner with the Bay Times’ own Betty Sullivan and Jennifer Viegas, Juan Barani, Linda Scaparotti, Robert Holgate, and a welcoming contingent from Dolby at Table Number One. The program started with an amusing twist as the stars of The Golden Girls Live! took the stage with character banter and announced their holiday shows coming to the Curran Theatre. The evening’s honorees could not have been more perfect nor more warmly received. Dr. Marcy Adelman received the Visionary Award, speaking with such authority and yet humility. Suzanne Ford, Executive Director of SF Pride, received the Leadership Award, a fitting acknowledgement of her groundbreaking work as the first transgender person in that important position. A charismatic auctioneer drew enthusiastic bids from the room, adding thousands of dollars to the wide-ranging work of Horizons, including the popular Fund-a-Need section, attracting nearly unanimous participation.

Horizons President Roger Doughty completed the evening with a realistic look at the current state of philanthropy and a confident outlook ahead. As we wandered out into the crisp night air, we carried appreciation for Horizons’ years of community changing generosity and optimism for the future ahead.

PHOTO BY SHAWN NORTHCUTT

Rather than giving cursory atten-

tion to several intervening events, including a boiling hot, but enthusiastically attended, 50th Annual Castro Street Fair, we now turn our attention to the extraordinary celebration of Cleve Jones’ 70th birthday on Friday, October 11. The evening started with a VIP reception at the offices of SWA Architects, responsible for the reimagined Harvey Milk Plaza now underway. A host of elected officials, including State Senator Toni Atkins and Queen Mother of the Imperial Court System Nicole the Great, and community leaders lauded Cleve with praise and humor, setting the stage for the much more raucous celebration to come.

The Hibernia Bank building hosted the main event and this venue surpassed all expectations. Perched on a prominent corner with stately columns and stylized dome roof, it was surrounded by a line of waiting guests as we arrived. Once through the massive doors and frenetic check-in desks, we entered a cavernous rectangular space with richly detailed walls and a gloriously ornamented ceiling, featuring recessed stained glass. Bars were everywhere and a comfortable seating area awaited VIP ticket-holders.

“If I had to say what my one greatest accomplishment is, it’s that I lasted, and I’m still happy.

I hope that comes through.”

—Cleve Jones

Friday, October 18 Castro Night Market Food, merchants, entertainment 5–9 pm Free!

Sunday, October 20 Castro Stroll Día de los Muertos Arts & crafts Noon–5 pm Free!

Saturday, October 26 Halloween in the Castro Street Celebration in Castro neighborhood Noon–8 pm Free!

Sunday, October 27 Halloween Block Party Costume contests for kids, pets & adults Noe & Market streets Noon–5 pm Free!

Thursday, October 31 Divas & Drinks: Kamala Harris’ “Midnight Magic” With Emcee Donna Sachet, DJ Lamont, Margot Duane of POUNCE! and the Feline Finesse dancers The Academy SF 2166 Market Street $15 https://www.academy-sf.com/

Within minutes of arriving, guests packed the place and the Audrey Joseph production began. Various groups, representing parts of our community that have been important to Cleve over his decades here, formed a parade of sorts, with each group assembling on stage for photos. The SF Gay Men’s Chorus sang powerfully, Cleve spoke engagingly, Sister Roma led the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence in a blessing, and Leather title-holders, colorful flaggers, community groups, and others swelled with excitement. We joined the procession of drag in all its many iterations, parading with our Sister Empresses, all wearing the official crown of the nearly 60-year-old Imperial Court of San Francisco. What a sense of pride and revelation at the wide spectrum of modern drag as we gathered around country music singer Chris Houseman singing his original drag-themed song. We’ll long remember winding down the night, dancing to DJ Phil B, surrounded by smiles and laughter.

Amid all this revelry, let’s not forget that this was an evening benefiting the SF AIDS Foundation and AIDS Memorial Quilt, both of which Cleve helped found, and Horizons, home of the newly created Cleve Jones Community Fund.

The guest list was so numerous and varied that it was easier to identify the few who were not there. If ever a person had earned this elaborate and joyful birthday celebration, it is Cleve Jones. Years from now, we predict that this party will be similar to Truman Capote’s Black & White Ball at the Plaza Hotel in 1966, madly anticipated, wildly attended, and historically significant. But in contrast, Cleve’s party, although purportedly in his honor, paid tribute to so many others and his journey with them, full of determination, resilience, and joy. Happy Birthday, my friend!

Donna Sachet is a celebrated performer, fundraiser, activist, and philanthropist who has dedicated over two decades to the LGBTQ Community in San Francisco. Contact her at empsachet@gmail.com S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

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ABOUT OUR COVER (continued from pg 3)

ROSTOW (continued from pg 14)

Even the Democratic Party platform in respect to climate should have bolder steps in the view of many, but it at least takes into account basic science and offers greater hope.

months when the High Court was formally out of session. Now, it’s back and several of these lawsuits will be finding their way to the nine justices, either in the form of petitions or as actual cases under review.

Now consider the Republican platform plans for the LGBTQ+ community.

Guess what? There are none. Former president Trump seems forever to mention “transgender” in his hate-filled, fear-mongering campaign speeches, and yet the transgender community as well as all other LGBTQ+ communities are not even recognized in the party’s official platform.

The one actual case we are bracing for this session is the Equal Protection challenge to Tennessee’s ban on health care for transgender youth, called United States v Skyrmetti. Skyrmetti was accepted for review as the Court ended its last session, but we do not have any scheduled arguments as yet.

The Democratic platform, once again in stark contrast, has an entire section on LGBTQ+ rights. It begins: “For generations, LGBTQI+ Americans have summoned the courage to live authentically and proudly, even when it meant putting their lives and livelihoods at risk. LGBTQI+ Americans continue to inspire and bring hope to all people seeking a life true to who they are, and to enrich every aspect of American life. But the fight for equality is far from over, as the LGBTQI+ community continues to face attacks and bigotry in states across the country. Democrats are committed to defending LGBTQI+ rights.”

We have not even touched on key issues such as a woman’s right to choose and gun safety. It goes without saying that the stakes in this year’s elections are enormously high. Experience is its own form of education and we each have our particular biases, making it all the more important to do what research is possible concerning this election season’s candidates and measures before voting. Now is the time to check out these and other sources: 2024 Democratic Party Platform: https://bit.ly/3Nrac2A

League of Women Voters of San Francisco Voter Guide (including nonpartisan election sources): https://lwvsf.org/vote Alice B. Toklas Democratic Club Endorsements: https://bit.ly/48dqfLe Harvey Milk LGBTQ Democratic Club Endorsements: https://bit.ly/484v09I

JUSTER (continued from pg 4) wonderful people from other nonprofits, schools, and organizations who are doing good work to help make the world a better place for all of us.

Recently I was at a health fair at Gavilan College in Gilroy, in the southernmost part of Santa Clara County. My image of Gilroy had been shaped by growing up in Santa Clara so many years ago, pre-Silicon Valley, when Gilroy was a conservative little community known for raising cows and garlic.

Imagine my surprise to see that this health fair, far from urban centers, featured, not one, not two, not three, but four tables featuring information and support for the LGBTQ+ community. While other parts of the country are vehemently trying to ban drag, ban queer books, and ban any way of supporting and nurturing transgender and gender expansive people, here was a college, and a community, actively welcoming and supporting them. The services—some from nonprofits, others from Santa Clara County itself— were wide-ranging, thoughtful, helpful, and affirming. They covered a broad range of types of support including healthcare, mental health, and even trainings for other organizations on how to provide culturally competent support for a community that is very much in need of it.

I was surprised, impressed, and moved. And finding so much support in an unexpected place gave me hope. Just a couple of days prior, I had read that The Trevor Project had published a study on the profound negative effects of anti-transgender legislation. According to their study, suicide attempts among some young people increased by as much as 72% in the years after anti-transgender legislation was enacted.

Hatred and bigotry can cause real harm to real human beings. Seeing those four welcoming tables at a health fair at a small college in a quiet semi-rural area gave me great hope. The power of love, of offering a welcoming and understanding place, can create hope, and change lives. Well done, Gilroy.

Breast Cancer Awareness Month October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, so this is your gentle reminder that early detection saves lives. Anyone with breast tissue can get breast cancer—women and men, cisgender and trans. Please learn how to check yourself, learn what is normal for your body, and talk to your doctor about what screenings are appropriate for you. It can save your life.

Joanie Juster is a long-time community volunteer, activist, and ally.

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In one example last August, the Court said Louisiana was not obliged to enforce the Biden administration’s interpretation of Title IX while the administration rules were under court challenge. That was a three-page “decision,” which was followed by a nine-page objection from four justices who thought the majority went too far. I won’t go into this (the Court essentially blocked aspects of the Biden rules that were not even challenged) because my point is that these mini-decisions have a large impact on our lives without creating a precedent or enjoying a full examination of the issues.

Then there are petitions for review that are set aside on the Court’s list of things to discuss for months and months, leaving a major case in limbo along with all its implications.

Then there are the cases that are rejected, where we sometimes see a dissent but where usually we have no idea which six justices refused to hear the matter.

2024 Republican Party Platform: https://bit.ly/3BF3Bzc

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Complicating the situation is the rise of the “shadow docket,” decisions that the Court makes year-round without full briefs, arguments, or significant thought (so it seems), on a preliminary basis. Often, these emergency motions are handed down without comment so you don’t even know what the justices were thinking. A typical example is an antigay law or a gay-friendly policy that is contested in lower court. If the law or policy is put on hold for the duration of what could be years of litigation, the other party can ask a higher court to quickly review that decision before the case continues. If that quick review winds up at the High Court, their quick reply can leave everyone scratching their heads.

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Unlike the days of the marriage equality cases, which were all pretty much alike, these days we are contesting a dozen issues, most of which concern transgender citizens—their civil rights, their health, their humanity. But we are also battling harsh red state laws that target GLBT students, business owners, and entertainers.

Just the other day, on October 9, a three-judge panel of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Eleventh Circuit heard arguments about whether or not Florida can enforce its ban on drag performances while a lawsuit continues through the process. According to legal analyst Chris Geidner, it looks as if the panel will say no, which is nice. But then again, we can assume that refusal will head to the High Court and by the time it crosses my path again I will have totally forgotten the details.

Look, I’ll just do the best I can. Bring on the Prevagen.

Oh, but before we go, I just read about a workplace discrimination case brought by an Ohio woman who claims she was passed over for promotion because she was straight, in violation of Title VII’s ban on discrimination because of sex—and by implication sexual orientation. I see contrarian cases like this often enough, but usually ignore them. But astonishingly, this time the U.S. Supreme Court has just accepted review of this oddity and will hear the matter this session.

I will have to look it up and find out exactly what happened to this woman and why she thinks being straight has anything to do with her woes. She lost in lower courts, so it’s not at all obvious why the justices would jump in here. I’ll be in touch next time!

Colorado Dismisses Case Against Masterpiece Guy Remember Jack Phillips, the Colorado baker who won the right to discriminate against GLBT clientele thanks to a technical ruling from the High Court in 2018? Alert readers may also recall that a transgender activist, Autumn Scardina, jumped on the bandwagon at the time by setting up a lawsuit of her own against Phillips. In 2017, as the first case was reaching its very public conclusion, Scardina asked the unpleasant cakester to make her a transition cake that was pink on the inside and blue on the exterior. Of course, Phillips refused, and Scardina sued him.

I confess I thought Scardina and her deliberately litigious cake request was self-promotional. The issue was already being contested under a much more straightforward set of facts, so to speak, in the Masterpiece Cakeshop case. Eventually, the High Court majority found that a Colorado commission had discriminated against Phillips by not respecting his religious views (or something like that) but then fecklessly declined to rule on the main question of whether or not Phillips violated the state law against GLBT discrimination when he refused even to sell a premade cake to two gay men.

(May I digress and say that this was one of the more cowardly and regressive “decisions” by a generally pro-gay Court, written by the weirdly weaselly champion of GLBT rights, Anthony Kennedy? It was useless and I hated it.)

At any rate, the notion that the same Court that had dithered around this exact issue for years would now take Scardina’s transition cake business seriously was nonsense. In March 2019, the AP reports, the state came to a deal with Phillips and dropped both the original discrimination complaint and the one that stemmed from Scardina’s suit. But that deal didn’t stop Scardina, who pursued Phillips for another five years. Now, the Colorado Supreme Court has dismissed her case, ruling that Scardina had not exhausted her options in the lower courts (God, help us).

Oh, for heaven’s sake. Drop this! If we couldn’t win Masterpiece Cakeshop with Ginsburg and Kennedy, we’re not going to win it with Kavanaugh and Barrett. And let’s not give Jack Phillips any more time in the limelight. arostow@aol.com

Horizons Gala 2024

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The California Academy of Sciences provided a unique and beautiful setting for the annual gala of the Horizons Foundation held on Saturday, October 5, 2024. Arriving guests received a warm welcome by a troupe of fantastical characters who delighted the full house crowd throughout the evening.

Executive Director Roger Doughty, Board Co-Chairs Dipti Ghosh and Shilpen Patel, and other leaders shared perspectives on the role of the foundation as the LGBTQ+ community’s leading source of philanthropic services and education.

Recipient of the Horizons Leadership Award for 2024 was San Francisco Pride Executive Director Suzanne Ford, who has become a much admired role model through her hard work and diplomacy, as demonstrated during her years of board service and subsequent executive leadership.

Openhouse Co-Founder Dr. Marcy Adelman, who is also a San Francisco Bay Times columnist, received the organization’s Visionary Award and was recognized for her unfailing commitment over multiple decades resulting in the establishment of innovative housing for LGBTQ elders and more.

The San Francisco Bay Times is proud to have continued its longstanding role as Media Sponsor for the event and congratulates those whose hard work resulted in an enjoyable and highly successful event.

PHOTO BY A. SPARKS

http://www.horixonsfoundation.org/gala

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MILLER (continued from pg 10)

GREENE (continued from pg 10)

investing and savings can be influenced by a positive view of the future.

• Handle legal and tax matters. The trustee is responsible for ensuring that the trust complies with all relevant laws and regulations, including filing tax returns, paying any taxes due, and dealing with legal challenges or disputes that may arise. In California, navigating complex tax issues, such as those arising from Proposition 19, which affects property tax reassessments on inherited property, requires a deep understanding of state-specific regulations.

• Communicate with beneficiaries.

Trustees must keep beneficiaries informed about the trust’s status and any decisions that affect them. This can involve providing regular statements, answering questions, and addressing concerns.

What is your risk versus reward approach?

Those with a reward orientation often take proactive actions with their savings such as setting up personalized financial plans and accessing financial help. We establish a client’s risk tolerance and plan accordingly. There are tradeoffs throughout when considering different types of risk-taking. Risk doesn’t have to be a bad thing; undertaking a thoughtful amount of risk can lead to outsized and critically important rewards.

How financially literate (or illiterate) are you?

And finally, those with high financial literacy are more likely to review retirement savings periodically, have emergency savings, and report less stress connected to finances.

No matter how you scored, there is a lot of groundwork that can be laid to set you up for future success. Here are some Saving 101 Basics to keep in your back pocket.

Don’t ignore the need to save.

Being aware and having it on your radar raises the tendency to work toward the goal in an achievement-oriented manner. Being conscientious is the most important of the “Big Five” personality traits affecting financial decisions, according to Kim Peijnenburg, a professor at the EDHEC Business School in Nice, France.

Be realistic about how much you may need to save.

People’s perceptions of their own longevity have implications for their retirement planning. That’s why we generally run our projections to age 100 unless there are known factors present that make that unlikely. According to Arizona State University finance professor Rawley Z. Heimer, many underestimate how long they will live when they are young, which leads them to consume and spend recklessly, save less, and make suboptimal decisions for retirement planning. But as they get older, they overestimate their lifespans, rein in spending, and go slow on drawing down their retirement assets.

Keep up with the Joneses.

In the case of saving, sometimes the desire to keep on pace can be a good thing.

Neighbors, peers, family members, and coworkers can all help shape how much people save for retirement. Michael Haliassos, Chair of Microeconomics and Finance at Goethe University in Frankfurt, has extensively studied how “others” help boost wealth accumulation. Boiled down, this peer effect tends to encourage us to be more like our neighbors.

Ask for help.

Check in with professional peers, family, friends and loved ones. What is working for them? There are a ton of free resources out there to brush up on your financial literacy including the Consumer Protection Finance Bureau ( https://bit.ly/4f5fbly ).

Finally, seek advice from a Financial Advisor if you are stressing about your future.

That’s what we are here for.

The opinions expressed in this article are for general informational purposes only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual or on any specific security. It is only intended to provide education about the financial industry. To determine which investments may be appropriate for you, consult your financial advisor prior to investing. Any past performance discussed during this program is no guarantee of future results. Any indices referenced for comparison are unmanaged and cannot be invested into directly. As always, please remember investing involves risk and possible loss of principal capital; please seek advice from a licensed professional.

Brio Financial Group is a registered investment adviser. Advisory services are only offered to clients or prospective clients where Brio Financial Group and its representatives are properly licensed or exempt from licensure. No advice may be rendered by Brio Financial Group unless a client service agreement is in place.

Brandon Miller, CFP®, is a financial consultant at Brio Financial Group in San Francisco, specializing in helping LGBT individuals and families plan and achieve their financial goals. For more information: https://www.briofg.com/

GAFFNEY/LEWIS (continued from pg 3) whopping 21 percentage point lead over her Republican opponent in the race for Delaware’s only House seat, according to a September 19 University of Delaware poll. We are ecstatic that in all likelihood we will soon have a powerful trans member of the U.S. Congress standing up in their own authentic voice for trans and queer rights.

Elections by their very nature involve voters choosing between two or more candidates. But they don’t have to fuel separation of people into “we” and “they.” As the campaigns of Trump and other Republicans seek cynically to divide between “they/ them” and “you,” Kamala Harris understands—and the CDC survey demonstrates—that “you” are in fact “they/them.”

John Lewis and Stuart Gaffney, together for over three decades, were plaintiffs in the California case for equal marriage rights decided by the California Supreme Court in 2008. Their leadership in the grassroots organization Marriage Equality USA contributed in 2015 to making same-sex marriage legal nationwide.

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Given these substantial responsibilities, the selection of a trustee is not a decision to be taken lightly. While many people consider appointing a family member or close friend, it’s worth exploring the option of choosing a professional trustee.

Why a Professional Trustee Might Be the Better Choice 1. Expertise and Experience Professional trustees bring a wealth of knowledge and experience to the table. They are typically financial professionals, such as trust officers, attorneys, certified public accountants, or other professional fiduciaries, who specialize in managing trusts and estates. This expertise is invaluable in navigating the complexities of trust administration, including investment management, legal compliance, and tax planning.

In the Bay Area, where estate planning often involves significant assets, multiple properties, and intricate financial portfolios, the expertise of a professional trustee is especially beneficial.

Unlike a family member or friend, a professional trustee has the necessary skills to make informed decisions about the trust’s assets, ensuring that they are managed wisely and in the best interest of the beneficiaries. This level of expertise can help avoid costly mistakes and ensure that the trust’s objectives are met efficiently.

2. Neutrality and Impartiality One of the significant challenges of appointing a family member or friend as a trustee is the potential for conflicts of interest. Family dynamics can be complicated, and personal relationships can sometimes cloud judgment, leading to disputes or even litigation among beneficiaries.

A professional trustee, on the other hand, acts as an impartial third party. They have no personal stake in the trust’s assets or in the relationships among the beneficiaries. This neutrality allows them to make decisions based solely on what is in the best interest of the trust and its beneficiaries, without the risk of favoritism or emotional bias. In a diverse and sometimes complex social environment like the Bay Area, this impartiality can be crucial in maintaining family harmony and ensuring that the trust is administered fairly.

3. Ability to Handle Complex Situations Trusts can become complicated, particularly when they involve significant assets, multiple beneficiaries, charities, or complex legal and tax issues. A professional trustee is equipped to handle these complexities, drawing on their experience to manage the trust effectively even in challenging circumstances.

For example, if the trust includes business interests, real estate, or other specialized assets— common in the Bay Area, where many residents own tech startups, investment properties, or other high-value assets—a professional trustee has the knowledge to manage these assets properly. They are also adept at dealing with legal challenges, beneficiary disputes, and other potential issues that may arise during the trust’s administration.

4. Continuity and Reliability Professional trustees offer continuity in the administration of the trust. Unlike a family member or friend, who may become unable to serve due to illness, death, or other personal reasons, a professional trustee is typically part of an organization that can provide consistent service over the life of the trust. This reliability ensures that the trust is managed without interruption, providing peace of mind that your wishes will be carried out as intended.

5. Relieving the Burden on Loved Ones Serving as a trustee is a time-consuming and often stressful responsibility. By appointing a professional trustee, you can relieve your loved ones of this burden, allowing them to focus on their relationship with the beneficiaries rather than the administrative and financial duties of trust management. This can be particularly important during times of grief or family tension, where the added responsibility of serving as a trustee could exacerbate emotional stress. In a fast-paced environment like the Bay Area, where many residents juggle demanding careers and personal responsibilities, the relief provided by a professional trustee can be invaluable.

Choosing the right trustee is one of the most important decisions you’ll make in your estate planning process. It may be tempting to appoint a trusted family member or friend, but the responsibilities of a trustee are significant and require a high level of expertise, impartiality, and commitment. A professional trustee offers these qualities, ensuring that your trust is administered effectively and in accordance with your wishes. By opting for a professional trustee, you can safeguard your estate, protect your beneficiaries, and provide lasting peace of mind for everyone involved.

Choose to secure your legacy, protect your loved ones, and gain peace of mind. Contact us at obed@greenelawfirm.com or call us at 415905-0215 to schedule your consultation. Your future deserves the attention to detail and care that you have established for your life.

Statements In Compliance with California Rules of Professional Conduct: The materials in this article have been prepared by Attorney Jay Greene for educational purposes only and are not legal advice. This information does not create an attorney-client relationship. Individuals should consult with an estate planning and elder law attorney for up-to-date information for their individual plans.

Jay Greene, Attorney, CPA, is the founder of Greene Estate, Probate, & Elder Law Firm based in San Francisco, and is focused on helping LGBT individuals, couples, and families plan for their future, protect their assets, and preserve their wealth. For more information and to schedule an assessment, visit: https://assetprotectionbayarea.com/

Jean-Michel Frank: Modernism, Minimalism, and Luxury

Templeton Crocker’s library, San Francisco

from forged iron, bronze, mica, and gold.

As writer Maurice Martin du Gard noted, “Simplicity was becoming fashionable but, in fact, cost the earth.” Those who could afford such austerity quickly made him the most highly sought after decorator in Paris.

Faces from Our LGBT Past Dr. Bill Lipsky Ilsa Lund and Rick Blaine may have planned to take flight from Paris to Marseilles just ahead of Germany’s invasion of the city in June 1940, but theirs was not the only escape route away from the imminent Occupation. That same month, in a scene as dramatic as any in Casablanca, Jean-Michel Frank and his lover William Thaddeus Lovett fled the capitol for Bordeaux, only days before France fell to its enemy’s forces, hoping to secure visas to reach Portugal and then the United States.

Jean-Michel Frank (left), William Thaddeus Lovett (right)

The two men, who had been together for more than six years, both knew that Frank’s reputation as the foremost interior designer and decorator of his generation would not save him from a regime that was notorious for persecuting intellectuals, modernists, Jews, and homosexuals. Famous for his minimalist aesthetic expressed with expensive necessaries—his rooms were graced with simple furnishings made from the finest, rarest, most costly materials in the world—he personified everything they found abhorrent.

From the beginning of his career, Frank rejected the so-called opulence of Victorian interior design, with its mix of historical styles, eclectic furnishings, patterned wallpaper, maudlin pictures of childhood days fondly remembered, and objects d’art that had nothing to do with the room they cluttered. Deeply influenced by Eugenia Errázuriz, a famed patron of the arts who believed “elegance means elimination,” he embraced an ethos of radical simplicity, where even the most basic household items had straightforward, uncomplicated lines.

For Frank, “luxury was in the quality and not the quantity of the furnishings.” He covered interior walls with sheepskin parchment; fabricated curtains from raw silk; upholstered couches and chairs with Hermès leather; veneered tables with shagreen and straw marquetry; and formed lamps

Frank’s 3,200-square-foot apartment in Saint-Germain-de-Prés showcased his minimalist artistic vision. None of the ten rooms contained anything except essential furniture: no pictures, few decorations.

After visiting for the first time, Jean Cocteau remarked, “Charming young man.

Pity he was robbed.” Even so, “le style Frank” became the must-have choice for high society. When he told clients that he was “willing to design our new apartment so long as we agree to get rid of most of our furniture,” they willingly agreed.

In 1926, a commission from influential art patrons Marie-Laure and Charles de Noailles made Frank the most important interior designer in France. To create a new interior for their mansion at 11 place des Etats-Unis in Paris, he stripped away the building’s elegant, gilded adornments, covered the walls with parchment panels, and furnished the great salon with items made from the world’s most luxurious materials.

In 2019, The New York Times Style Magazine named it one of “The 25 Rooms That Influence the Way We Design.”

His next great project “brought Jean-Michel Frank to the forefront of the international scene.” In 1927, Templeton Crocker hired him to design the interior of his nine-room, 6,000-square-foot penthouse apartment at 945 Green Street on San Francisco’s famed Russian Hill. Mary Ashe Miller, writing in the August 3, 1929, issue of Vogue, described “the first large and luxurious apartment to be done completely in the modern manner in the United States” as “one of the most beautiful ... in the world.”

Now the world’s most famous interior designer, Frank accepted only the most prestigious assignments for exorbitant fees: the music room of American songwriter Cole Porter’s Paris apartment; interiors for haute couturier Elsa Schiaparelli’s homes, headquarters, and boutique at 21 place Vendôme, where it remains; perfumier Jean-Pierre Guerlain’s salon on the Champs-Élysées; and Mary and Nelson and Rockefeller’s three story penthouse apartment at 810 Fifth Avenue, New York, completed in 1938, which was his last great commission.

Frank was 38 when he met Lovett, 19, in 1933. Theirs was “the strange union of a disenchanted German Jew, ‘dark, baroque, effeminate,’ and a Methodist Yankee,” Frank’s biographer Laurence Benaïm wrote later. Actually, he was from Corvallis, Oregon, where his father, Arthur Lester Lovett, had been Professor of Entomology at Oregon Agricultural College (now Oregon State University). With brown hair and hazel eyes, however, Thad, who stood 5’11’’ and weighed 160 pounds, truly looked like J. C. Leyendecker’s Arrow Collar man come to life.

The advancing war in Europe changed everything for the two men. No longer safe

Photos courtesy of Bill Lipsky

Templeton Crocker’s sun room, San Francisco

in Paris, they travelled south to Bordeaux, where they appealed to one of conflict’s greatest civilian heroes for rescue. Defying his government’s explicit orders, Aristides de Sousa Mendes, the city’s Portuguese consul, issued thousands of visas to those fleeing fascism. Described by historian Yehuda Bauer as “perhaps the largest rescue action by a single individual during the Holocaust,” Israel declared him to be a “Righteous Among the Nations” in 1966.

Lovett and Frank received their endorsements on June 20, 1940, the same day as Gala and Salvador Dali and jeweler Marc Koven and his family, among others. Lovett and the Kovens sailed from Lisbon on the S. S. Manhattan on July 12, arriving at New York on July 18—traveling on the S. S. Excambion, Dali reached the city on August 8—but Frank, despite his famous American clientele, had to take a more daunting route, first to Argentina, then to Brazil, then to the United States.

When Frank finally arrived in New York in December 1940, he and Lovett, who was now working for Koven at his prestigious jewelry store at 17 East 48th Street, had been apart for six difficult months. Although they kept in touch during his time in Buenos Aires, interior designer Celina Aranz later remembered that Frank became more and more depressed and reclusive, especially “after terrible scenes, by phone, between him and his American lover.” Now Lovett told him that he had met someone else and their relationship was over.

Some blamed their breakup for what happened next, but Frank made it clear in the note he left on March 8, 1941, that as an ailing, despondent, stateless refugee who had lost everything to the war in Europe, he had chosen to leave this realm. “I do this for no reason but ill health. I ask all my friends who have been so good to me to forgive me.

I thank them deeply for trying to help me, but I have no strength to go on.”

Apparently, Frank never met his cousin Anne, whose branch of the family moved from Germany to the Netherlands in 1933–1934, when she was four years old.

Deported to the death camps of German-occupied Poland in 1944, she perished at Bergen-Belsen in early 1945; only her father survived the Holocaust. Her wartime diary, first published in 1947, has been translated into more than 75 languages, inspiring readers with its beloved messages of courage, strength, humanity, and hope in the face of adversity.

For different reasons, Jean-Michel Frank’s legacy also is assured. In her memoir Shocking Life, 1954, Schiaparelli wrote that Frank “invented a new style of furniture combining simplicity with considerable luxury.”

More recently, Benaïm, whose biography of Frank appeared in 2017, stated, he “will continue to haunt our memories. Through his creations, he showed us the modernity of a point of view, impossible to reduce to a fashion or style. His force is to have opposed any form of theory or message—the ultimate truth of a dateless taste.”

Bill Lipsky, Ph.D., author of “LGBTQ+ Trailblazers of San Francisco” (2023) and “Gay and Lesbian San Francisco” (2006), is a member of the Rainbow Honor Walk board of directors.

Jean-Michel Frank-designed green lacquered game table with swivelling top, ca. 1928 S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

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Cleve Jones, who founded the Nobel Prize-nominated AIDS Memorial Quilt 37 years ago and was a founding contributor to the San Francisco Bay Times, was honored at his 70th Birthday Party on October 11, 2024.

The spectacular event, held appropriately on National Coming Out Day at 1 Jones Street (the Hibernia Building in San Francisco), will surely go down in history as one of San Francisco’s most significant and memorable celebrations of an LGBTQ+ activist.

Produced by another living legend in the community, Audrey Joseph, the evening began with a VIP reception attended by Speaker Emerita Nancy Pelosi, Mayor London Breed, State Senator Scott Wiener, State Senate President pro Tempore Emerita Toni Atkins, Russell Roybal, of the National Committee for Responsive Philanthropy, multiple Supervisors including Rafael Mandelman and Aaron Peskin, Queen Mother of the Americas Nicole Murray-Ramirez of the International Imperial Court System, and many other national, state, and local leaders.

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Cleve Jones 70th

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h Birthday Party After the reception, a procession including members of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence and additional LGBTQ+ leaders and allies made its way to the stage at the Hibernia.

Also included in the programming were Juanita MORE!, Sister Roma, Our Lady J, country singer Chris Housmann, Broadway star Anthony Wayne, the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus, DJ Phil B, and much more.

PHOTO BY KELLY HART PHOTO BY RINK

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PHOTO BY KELLY HART

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The party launched The Cleve Jones Community Fund, which is hosted by Horizons Foundation. The fund supports two organizations Jones cofounded: the San Francisco AIDS Foundation and the National AIDS Memorial, which is now home to the AIDS Memorial Quilt.

A virtual auction is still taking place as of this writing, with bidding ending on October 18. https://bit.ly/4040zhW

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The POUNCE! Project: Raising Awareness for Women’s Rights and Supporting Kamala Harris’ Campaign for President The project is designed to support Vice President Kamala Harris’ groundbreaking campaign for the presidency.

“The POUNCE! Project is a rallying cry, and a celebration as well as a call for solidarity, in the face of threats to women’s fundamental rights permeating our current political culture,” said Duane. “Our time is meow.”

POUNCE! Portrait Packages Duane is planning to photograph Cat Ladies in the Bay Area, in the Tiffany Shlain and her cat Midnight first phase. POUNCE! Portrait Packages include a documentary-style photo session with Cat Ladies and their beloved felines. Three magazine-quality, high resolution digital images (with and without kitty) will be included for a $450 fee.

Kimberly Ellis and her cat Agave

MARGOT DUANE/THE POUNCE! PROJECT

MARGOT DUANE/THE POUNCE! PROJECT

To raise awareness for women’s rights, Margot Duane—an internationally published photographer—has launched The POUNCE! Project, a documentary portrait series that celebrates the agency and diversity of the Cat Lady movement.

“I’m proud to support this artistic and impactful initiative to elevate women and shine a light on our fight for our fundamental rights,” said Kimberly Ellis, Director at the City & County of San Francisco Department on the Status of Women.

Amy Critchett and her cat Chloe

MARGOT DUANE/THE POUNCE! PROJECT

Cat Lady Movement Background “Cat Lady” is an insult usually reserved for women without children who share their homes with cats. A 2021 interview with Senator JD Vance recently resurfaced (with Tucker Carlson) in which Vance used the term “Childless Cat Ladies” to describe Harris and other politicians who don’t have biological children.

Bridget Cromwell and her cat Arthur Miller

MARGOT DUANE/THE POUNCE! PROJECT

A $50 contribution from each session will be donated to Harris’ historic campaign for president. Additionally, participants will have the opportunity to have their photos and personal messages to Harris included in a book that will be presented directly to her.

“I love the POUNCE! Campaign for mobilizing strong cat women to support Kamala for President,” said Tiffany Shlain, Bay Area-based artist and Emmy-nominated filmmaker.

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Margot Duane’s photography has been included in acclaimed publications such as TIME, Rolling Stone, and Forbes. She has photographed Hollywood royalty, political icons, and the occasional alley cat. She believes in the power of imagery as a catalyst for change. For over two decades, Duane has been telling human stories that inspire and capture the unique traits that make her subjects special.

For more information about The POUNCE! Project, please visit https://www.margotduane.com/pounce

Mary Choy and her cat Chimichanga

MARGOT DUANE/THE POUNCE! PROJECT

MARGOT DUANE/THE POUNCE! PROJECT

About Margot Duane

Calling All Cat Ladies for ‘Midnight Magic’ on Halloween Night at The Academy SF! Margot Duane, the creator of The POUNCE! Project supporting women’s rights and Vice President Kamala Harris’ presidential campaign, will be at The Academy SF on Halloween Night, October 31, 2024, along with colleague Betsy Levy for “Kamala Harris’ Midnight Magic.” The event, from 6–10 pm, will be part of the San Francisco Bay Times co-presented Divas & Drinks series. There you can compete for a chance to win a free portrait package from Duane and be included in the POUNCE! book that will be presented to Vice President and hopefully soon-to-be President Harris, or win an autographed copy of the book.

There are three ways you can enter to win these and other fabulous prizes!

The first is to come dressed in your feline finest for the event, where there will be multiple costume contests, including this cat-egory. Anyone can enter the costume contests, whether you are LGBTQIA2S+ (!) or not.

The second, for those who are woman-identifying and who have cat(s), is to send a high-resolution photo of your cat(s) to pouncephotocontest@gmail.com with your name and phone number in the subject line. Emailed entries must be received by October 29, 2024.

The third, also for those who are woman-identifying and have cat(s), is to bring a high-resolution photo of your cat(s) to the event. Please be sure to clearly write your name, email address, and phone number on the back of the image.

There will be multiple prizes, but the free portrait package will be a particularly coveted one given that you and your cat(s) will be among other cat ladies—infamous, famous, and perhaps famous-to-be—whose images will be included in the book that will be presented to Harris. Also, you will then be part of Duane’s incredible archive that includes not only Harris but also Hillary Clinton, Oprah Winfrey, former president Barack Obama, Governor Gavin Newsom, Gloria Steinem, and the list goes on.

Duane has also prominently helped document LGBTQ+ history. In 2004, her images of the first same-sex weddings at San Francisco City Hall were published in TIME Magazine as well as in the book We Do, published by Chronicle Books. In 2008, she produced Equalipalooza, a fundraiser featuring Margaret Cho, to fight Proposition 8.

Please then join Duane, Levy, and the San Francisco Bay Times on Halloween Night at The Academy SF! Register here: https://bit.ly/48cCw2y To learn more about Duane, visit: https://www.margotduane.com/

A Tale as Old as Time: Misogyny and the ‘Cat Lady’ Trope The historic roots of insulting certain women as being “cat ladies,” or better yet, crazy and/or childless cat ladies, go back to at least ancient Egypt and perhaps even before then—when the first feline bonded with a woman and a man negatively commented on that, or worse.

Cats are theorized to have had their unique relationship with humans starting around 12,000 years ago (probably much earlier), and it was only 332 years ago when the Salem Witch Trials occurred, resulting in the deaths of at least 25 people. At the time, both “witches” (including some men) and black cats were persecuted and killed together. The prejudice against black cats could lead to still more volumes of discussion here.

For now, photographer Margot Duane of The POUNCE! Project suggests reading these articles to learn more about the age-old sexist trope: NPR: https://n.pr/4eMLZzW KQED: https://bit.ly/3BMOCTT Felix (pet insurance company): https://bit.ly/4eNxD2q CNN: https://cnn.it/3U9vYM6 S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

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Foster Fail

Photos courtesy of Dr. Tim Seelig

animal for a year. It would allow me to go on tour with Bobby Jo more and give us time to heal from the loss. My history with such promises isn’t good. The last time I made that promise was with Dan when we lost Carmela. Grace joined our family just three weeks later.

OHS is a huge organization with a robust foster program. Since January, we fostered three little dogs and three sevenweek-old kittens. Tater Tot was great with all of them. We did our job and took them back when the assignment was over. Boxes checked.

TLC: Tears, Laughs and Conversation Dr. Tim Seelig Foster fail may be a new phrase for you. It has everything to do with foster and really nothing to do with fail. How could it be a failure if it ends in a committed relationship, moving in together, and creating a furever [sic] home? Fostering an animal is one of the most wonderful things you can do—for yourself and the animal. In most cases, the animal simply needs to be in a home with humans to care for them instead of the lonely and loud environment in a shelter.

For those of you who have followed my column over the last seven years, you know there have been two consistent themes: loving animals and doing what I can to change peoples’ lives. In retirement, I decided to focus on the first of those.

What I did not anticipate was that my volunteer position as Lobby Concierge at the Oregon Humane Societies (OHS) would allow me to do the second one as well. We adopt out an average of 30 animals per day. I get to see excitement and anticipation when people enter and the joy and often tears as they leave with a new family member.

I have always surrounded myself with animals and animal lovers. Sharing our lives with animals also means loss. Bobby Jo and I received hundreds of messages when we lost our beloved Tater Tot in June. The heartbreak of losing a pet is indescribable.

We pinky swore we would stay without an

Two months ago, the humane society received a call from a social worker about dogs in a dire situation. Two OHS workers responded. They found an elderly man who had just begun hospice care. He had 11 dogs. He loved them but had been unable to care for them. One had escaped a week earlier. The conditions were terrible in the garage where they lived. They told him they would need to take the dogs.

He understood and only asked if they would bring the dogs in one at a time so he could say goodbye.

One dog went to a neighbor. Nine were brought back to the shelter, spayed or neutered, chipped, vaccinated, and bathed.

They were all adorable and were adopted immediately. Not long after the rescue, the escapee was found on the streets. He was a mess and scared to death from weeks on the street. The shelter folks named him Bucky because of an adorable underbite.

He was not happy being neutered. Imagine that! He ripped his stitches out twice even with the cone of shame on! He was extremely agitated in the shelter environment. They put him on the foster list to find a quiet environment to allow him to heal. I volunteered.

When I first met him in the shelter, he jumped into my lap, nasty hard cone and all. I brought him home, took his cone off, and he jumped back in my lap. He hasn’t left my side. Some have suggested naming him Velcro. Bobby came home from

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Bobby Jo Valentine and Dr. Tim Seellig with Bucky

his latest tour and fell in love as well. We decided foster failure was for us! We’re keeping the name. He is seven years old and the sweetest boy in the world. He hasn’t barked yet!

Sometimes you don’t know you need to be rescued. I do know that when Tater Tot died, life wasn’t the same. I missed hearing his little nails on the hardwood floors as he came running to meet me when I came home. There was no need to say, “I’ll be back soon,” as I left the house for a bit. I missed him leaping off the couch when I asked, “You want your breakfast?” I had a husband, but I had lost my buddy. Every single dog I’ve had let me hold them when life circumstances knocked me down and brought me to tears. They always listened with no judgement. They were patient and let me hug them as long as I needed.

All my human relationships have been clear on where my dog (or dogs) fit in my life: right in the middle. I can never

express my gratitude for the canines: Honey Boy, Schatzi, La Di Da, Miss Mona Pearl, Big Daddy, Little Bear, Carmela, Gracey, Tater Tot, and now Bucky.

That may sound like a lot. We got Honey Boy when I was three. Bucky came along at seventy-three. Seventy years of joy and companionship.

Friends, if you can’t adopt an animal, consider fostering. Check with your local shelters or organizations to see if they need foster families. Giving a precious animal a few weeks of your time and energy and love can change their lives. It will change yours!

Grateful does not come anywhere near what our hearts feel. They are full and spilling over. It’s a little miracle that we found each other! Bucky is home.

Dr. Tim Seelig is the Conductor Laureate of the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus. http://www.timseelig.com/

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New Doc Recounts a Disturbing True Crime Tale Involving Tegan and Sara formed a strong community in an era when there were too few out musicians. Tegan and Sara received fan letters from closeted youth who shared their stories and Tegan would spend hours greeting fans at shows.

And the nascent days of social media allowed fans and the band to connect with each other.

Film Gary M. Kramer The queer musical twins Tegan and Sara have developed an intense and loyal fanbase since they started performing as teenagers in the mid-1990s. They even had a 2022 TV series, High School, based on their memoir. But the new documentary, Fanatical: The Catfishing of Tegan and Sara, out October 18 on Hulu, tells of a long, dark episode from their lives.

Directed by Erin Lee Carr, this compelling film recounts the “super terrifying” discovery, in 2011, that someone has been posing as “Fake Tegan”—or “Fegan,” as they come to call the impersonator—and interacting with the band’s fans. Not only that, Fegan has hacked Tegan’s accounts and has been posting and sharing professional content, including unreleased demos, as well as personal information about the twins’ mother’s breast cancer diagnosis, and even uploading the twins’ passports.

This development is all very concerning and extremely confounding. Who is Fegan, and how did they get access to this sensitive content? And why are they doing this?

Fanatical aims at answering these questions by systematically investigating the information and considering all of the possible suspects. First Carr establishes how Tegan and Sara’s accessibility to their fans may have made them vulnerable. The band was very influential for queer women who

But the interactions with superfans like Julie had become concerning. Apparently, Fegan started chatting with Julie online, asking her about her day, sending her music before it was released, and sharing personal information including sensitive identity theft content. Julie contacted Tegan and Sara’s management team, who became worried by this breach, only to discover that the situation was far more damaging and widespread than they initially expected. Several individuals had been targeted by Fegan, who violated their trust by creating an “intimate” relationship with fans. Julie recounts being so hurt by the catfishing she could not listen to Tegan and Sara’s music and stopped attending shows.

Fanatical is emotionally powerful when it conveys the impact of these actions, illustrating the shame and harm it had caused these innocent victims. One queer woman, JT, describes having to shut down any reference to Tegan and Sara, and admits to getting sick when hearing one of their songs while in a supermarket. JT’s story is more complicated than Julia’s, as JT spoke out against Tegan because she believed that the sexual messages that she received from Fegan were real. Her actions generated a backlash that prompted her to withdraw from queer spaces and the Vancouver music scene.

As things escalate, it becomes more difficult for Tegan’s investigative team to find the culprit. There is a suggestion it may be

a young woman named Jo in the U.K., while another source indicates it is Mark in Maine.

Pursuing these possibilities leads the film down various rabbit holes. Fanatical shows how the catfishing gets even more insidious when Tegan is breaking up with her girlfriend, Lindsey, and Fegan preys on that.

While it is disturbing that Tegan and Sara and their fans are susceptible and have been victimized—and for so long—the film asks: What is appropriate celebrity/fan interaction, and how insatiable is fan culture? If Fanatical doesn’t quite answer these questions it raises, it also provides limited satisfaction regarding how catching Fegan plays out in real life. In what is the best sequence in the film, Tegan and Carr have a phone call with a suspect they think is Fegan and the exchange is gripping.

Much of the film consists of interviews with Tegan, Sara, their investigative team, and the victims, and Carr leans arguably too much on typing out the copious messages

exchanged online between Fegan and the victims. To its credit, Fanatical makes the text content zippy and easy to follow, but there are some narrative curlicues in this convoluted story that feel like loose threads.

Early in the film, Tegan questions wanting to make the documentary. The difficulty of reliving and reexamining the events that unfolded is obviously painful and frustrating, but Tegan comes off well. It is unfortunate that a queer musical group and its fans were targeted given the sensitivity of the community.

The film does break away from its story periodically to showcase some of Tegan and Sara’s music, emphasizing the joy the performers have given to so many for so long. That there has been deceit and manipulation is troubling. That there is more confusion than answers is doubly disturbing.

Fanatical is a compelling cautionary tale about the perils of fame in the digital age. © 2024 Gary M. Kramer Gary M. Kramer is the author of “Independent Queer Cinema: Reviews and Interviews,” and the co-editor of “Directory of World Cinema: Argentina.” He teaches Short Attention Span Cinema at the Bryn Mawr Film Institute and is the moderator for Cinema Salon, a weekly film discussion group.

Follow him on Twitter @garymkramer

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Frightening and Funny Films for Halloween Season Viewing

Off the Wahl Jan Wahl

This time of year, we think of movies that scare us. Naturally, I go in another direction. I think of films set with witches, warlocks, monsters, and mayhem that make me laugh, or at least smile. The traditionally scary ones, hatchet killers and crazed clowns, give me nightmares, so I stay clear. I love a creepy undertone or dark surprises, but no gross-outs or graphic gore.

One of my favorites for October viewing is Bell, Book and Candle, which

takes us to Greenwich Village in the 1950s.

A modern-day witch encounters a charming human and decides to go after him.

Even better: he is the fiancé of her old college rival. Mesmerizing cat eyes and spellcasting, plus a remarkable cast, make this fantasy romcom fun to watch. The stars include Kim Novak (never more beautiful), James Stewart, Elsa Lanchester, Jack Lemmon, and a fabulous Siamese cat named Pyewacket. Lucious Kim told me that they used a few cats; one was better in closeups, one did leaps perfectly. She loved them all, and adored making this film. This is the same year another film with Novak and Stewart came out, Hitchcock’s Vertigo.

These two were on a roll.

If we are talking classics, we must include Young Frankenstein, Mel Brook’s homage to Universal monster movies. Though released in 1974, it is still fresh and original.

Respected medical doctor Frederick Frankenstein learns he has inherited his infamous grandfather’s Transylvania estate. He begins to recreate his grandfather’s experiments with the help of Igor, Inga, and the fearsome Frau Blucher (cue the horse whinnies). This atmospheric, offbeat comedy

stars Gene Wilder, Marty Feldman, Cloris Leachman, Madeline Kahn, and an array of actual sets and props from the classic Universal films. This zany, yet brilliant, satire is perfect Halloween viewing.

Directed by George Miller in his first film since the Mad Max franchise, The Witches of Eastwick can be viewed as a female empowerment manifesto or a male supernatural tale about keeping women in their place. Weirdly, it is both at the same time. Three interesting women—Cher, Susan Sarandon, and Michele Pfeiffer—share their issues over martinis. The wind sweeps in Jack Nicholson, and he goes to work seducing all of them.

With revelations about Harvey Weinstein, he seems alarmingly predatory to us now, but this is one of those films where it is best to sit back and let go. I think Cher steals it, but I always feel that about her presence. The film is adapted from John Updike’s novel. Though Hocus Pocus is easier to follow, this one is intriguing and just plain strange.

Now let us get seriously scary.

Shadow of the Vampire stars John Malkovich as director F.W. Murnau struggling to create his silent classic Nosferatu. He employs a real vampire—a very creepy Willem Dafoe—explaining to the crew that he is a “method actor.” The making of this classic horror film has become legendary, and Shadow of the Vampire is welltold historical fiction.

Want to see me scared and nervous? 1955’s Night of the Hunter is a film noir thriller about a psychopathic man of the cloth determined to find two children hiding their father’s money. Robert Mitchum is so dark; he is evil to the core in this film. It is the only movie Charles Laughton directed, and he should have done others.

With Shelley Winters, Lillian Gish, amazing lighting and camera work, and more, this movie freaks me out every time.

Happy Halloween, everyone!

Jan Wahl is a Hollywood historian and film critic on various broadcast outlets. She has two Emmys and many awards for her longtime work on behalf of film buffs and the LGBTQ community. Contact her at www.janwahl.com

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Panel Discussion on the Book When the Band Played On: The Life of Randy Shilts The James C. Hormel LGBTQIA Center at the San Francisco Library welcomed guests on Tuesday, October 8, 2024, for a panel discussion on the new book When the Band Played On: The Life of Randy Shilts, America’s Trailblazing Gay Journalist. Panelists included author Michael Lee along with journalists Leah Garchik and Randy Alfred, who served as sources for the book.

(Alfred was the founding news editor of the San Francisco Bay Times.) There was also a hands-on history tour of the Randy Shilts Papers at the center.

Some of those materials are online at: https://bit.ly/4h8KUEg

Top of your stack

RECOMMENDATIONS FROM BOOK PASSAGE

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Playground (fiction - hardcover)

by Richard Powers

To read more about the new book on Randy Shilts (1951–1994), go to: https://bit.ly/3TSKiIG PHOTO BY RINK

And see the related coverage in the previous issue of the San Francisco Bay Times: https://bit.ly/405ejZK

loss, and self-discovery, their lives become deeply intertwined with those around them, exploring how much emotional weight one life can carry without unraveling.

Richard Powers’ new novel interweaves the lives of four individuals drawn together on a remote island, where a decision about humanity’s next frontier— floating cities at sea—forces them to confront themes of technology, the environment, and human connection.

Set in the Pacific, this story explores the balance between progress and preservation in a still-untouched oceanic world.

The Mighty Red (fiction - hardcover)

by Louise Erdrich

Louise Erdrich tells the story of a love triangle set in a small North Dakota town, where family tensions, personal struggles, and environmenIntermezzo (fic- tal changes collide.

Against the backdrop tion - hardcover) of a fragile economy

by Sally Rooney and shifting natural forces, This book folthe novel explores love, lows two brothers, survival, and the deep Peter and Ivan, bond between people and navigating grief the land. The Might Red is and complicated Book Passage’s October relationships in Signed First Edition Book the wake of their Club pick. father’s death. As they confront love, (continued on page 38)

Lit Snax Carmilla by Sheridan Le Fanu Written in 1872, decades before Dracula, this novel features castles, nightmares, and a crypto-lesbionic vampire!

Vampire Cinema: The First One Hundred Years

by Christopher Frayling Your coffee table definitely needs this lavishly illustrated and spine-tingling book about everyone’s favorite cinematic monsters The Vampire Lestat by Anne Rice Bisexual vampire Lestat de Lioncourt has been scaring readers with his bloodcurdling antics since 1985. Find out why this book has been hailed as a horror classic. https://www.fabulosabooks.com/

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The Donum Estate: A Magical World of Wine, Nature, and Art

Sbrocco Sips

The Donum Collection has become an international destination for lovers and creators of sculpture. As one of the world’s largest accessible private sculpture collections with nearly 60 pieces—many commissioned for specific sites on the property—it’s unlike any winery I’ve ever visited. Works from famed artists/sculptors such as Keith Haring, Fernando Botero, and Richard Hudson grace the 200-acre estate.

Donum’s reverence for nature, the soil, the vines, and ultimately, the wines, shines through in the glass reflecting Donum’s commitment to regenerative farming practices and low-intervention winemaking.

When visiting, there are multiple experiences to choose from including sculpture tours, wine tastings, and fabulous chef-prepared food and wine pairings (reservations required).

Not only are the sculptures stunning, but also the land itself is held in the highest regard by the family-owned winery.

Their wines, too, are as elegant and artistic as the place itself. As a winery that specializes in pinot noir and chardonnay, they

Leslie Sbrocco Looking for an exceptional place to visit in Wine Country? I have just the spot: The Donum Estate. Donum is the Latin word for “gift,” and a visit to the property is just that. It’s a winery that invites visitors to use all their senses to experience a magical world of wine, nature, and art.

The Donum “Carneros Estate” Pinot Noir ($95) is a beauty expressing floral, red berry aromatics with a medium bodied, silky texture. A touch of spice lingers on the finish showcasing the depth of the wine.

Decant and drink now alongside roast pork loin or stuffed portobello mushrooms.

The Donum “Carneros Estate” Chardonnay ($75) is one of the best California chardonnays I’ve tasted in years. With laserlike purity of fruit that complements balanced freshness and a kiss of French oak complexity, it’s truly a gift to drink. It is delicious now, but will age for years. https://www.thedonumestate.com

LOVE ME by artist Richard Hudson

ROBERT BERG FOR THE DONUM ESTATE

Situated in the lush Carneros area between Sonoma and Napa straddling the San Pablo Bay, The Donum Estate is tucked away along a winding road. You’ll know you’ve reached the destination when suddenly greeted by breathtaking outdoor sculptures.

make multiple versions, but I recommend starting your Donum journey with their flagship Carneros bottlings:

Author, speaker, wine consultant, and television host Leslie Sbrocco is known for her entertaining approach to wine and food. She has won multiple Emmy Awards for her work on PBS, which includes hosting the series “Check, Please! Bay Area,” “Check, Please!

You Gotta Try This!” and “100 Days, Drinks, Dishes & Destinations.” www.LeslieSbrocco.com

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Let’s Toast to Diwali: A Celebration of Light and Life Cocktails With Dina

As the calendar shifts into November, our lives start to get filled with all the seasonal celebrations this time of year brings. One celebration that opens up every autumn season is Diwali, the Hindu festival of lights. During the five days of festivities, revelers around the globe light diyas, wear new clothes, and eat an amazing variety of unique confections.

Badaam Thandai It is also a time when families bond, share traditions, and reflect about what it means to be Indian, even in the City by the Bay, thousands of miles from where these traditions were born.

Rose is a particularly common flavor in India, both in drinks and sweets. One business that embodies this flavor (with a unique Bay Area twist!) is Naya Delights.

Their drinks blend traditional Indian flavors with modern flair in a way that helps the Southeast Asian diaspora feel connected even when celebrating in San Francisco. Their focus is on sharing these flavors with South Asians and non-South Asians by creating beverages that evoke nostalgia while also enticing newcomers with something delicious.

Diwali is a time for new experiences no matter your background, and in that spirit, I have collaborated with them to develop some unique new takes on classic Indian drinks designed to pique everyone’s interest.

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SUNCITI SUNDARAM IMAGES

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Falooda

San Francisco-based Dina Novarr enjoys sharing her passion for fine wines, spirits, non-alcoholic craft beverages, and more with others.

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Among the traditions, the drinks of Diwali hold a special place. Of course, there are classical Indian refreshments like the lassi or chai tea. But there are also concoctions for the more adven- Nimbu Pani turous, such as the badaam thandai, a unique mix of thandai, nuts, saffron, and fennel, or the nimbu pani, an Indian take on lemonade that includes chaat masala. But perhaps my favorite is the falooda, a unique dessert drink with rose and sweet basil

seeds, often served with ice cream.

Mango Splash PHOTO COURTESY OF DINA NOVARR

Massanez Liqueur de Mangue: 2 oz Combier Liqueur d’Orange: 1 oz orange juice: 2 oz rum: 1 oz Shake and pour into a long drink glass.

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(also delicious as a popsicle if you add 6 oz milk!)

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Shake and pour into a martini glass.

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PHOTO CREDIT: COOKSWITHCOCKTAILS.COM

Rose Lemon Drop

1.5 oz Vodka (I recommend Meili) 1.5 oz Combier Rose 0.5 oz lemon juice ½ teaspoon of raspberry purée

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The Gay Gourmet David Landis I’m taking a slight detour for my column this week to, of all places, St. Louis.

Why? I just celebrated my high school reunion there and had some musings (along with thoughts about restaurants) I thought I’d share.

Being a gay adolescent, I, perhaps like many of us in the LGBTQ+ community, felt awkward in high school. Or maybe it just comes with the territory for everyone? Puberty, raging hormones, questions about one’s sexuality or gender, and growing up quickly: all of that exacerbates a situation that already is fraught with the conflicts of football players vs. dweebs, cheerleaders vs. drama queens, or the inclusion and exclusion of numerous other cliques that permeate the high school experience.

So, when the idea of my 50th (gasp!) high school reunion started becoming a reality, I wasn’t quite sure I was going to go. Did I really want to see all these people, many of whom stayed in St. Louis,

Rob now sings (and has sung for a long time) with the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus. Coincidentally, he also is our marvelous piano tuner. He told me a year ago he was going to the reunion, and he asked if I wanted to join him—and would we bring our husbands. This made me consider so many questions. Should we attend? What would it be like, in Missouri, to appear with our husbands? And would our gay foursome join in the DJ dance party after the dinner?

Full disclosure: I was a nerd in high school.

I ran cross country, rather than play football. I was a straight A student (this isn’t bragging, as the intellects in high school were often sidelined). I was (shockingly) in the drama club and sang in the concert choir. Side note: our school had bus trips to the Saint Louis Symphony (where I later worked and sang with the Symphony Chorus), and I signed up not because of the music, but because we got to eat at Shakey’s Pizza Parlor afterwards. I guess I was always a foodie! Those outings made me embrace my love of classical music.

Back to school: I took physics and calculus, and I was in the advanced placement program. Worst of all, I was not only in the Latin Club, but also I was Vice President of that infamous coterie (and wore the geeky black tie to prove it).

Bottom line, I didn’t think I was a popular kid back then.

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So, after months of second guessing and misgivings, I finally decided to attend the reunion with my husband. (It also helped when United Airlines reinstated their nonstop service to St. Louis!)

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So, how was it? Fantastic.

From the minute I walked into the first night cocktail reception, I saw people I had known and liked. Parkway West was, I think, an outlier for a public school in St. Louis. We were taught critical thinking. We had the money for programs like choir and after school sports.

Our teachers, some of whom were gay, taught us with gusto and passion while

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giving us the tools to help us learn how to learn. As a result, most of the folks there were fairly liberal. Even if they weren’t, they were easy to talk to and welcoming. It made for a warm and inviting evening. Plus, even several of our teachers (who miraculously are still alive) were there: choral director Kay Wunder, P.E. teacher and pianist extraordinaire Ruth “Jonesy” Jones, and my cross-country coach, Dave Ganz, among others.

PHOTO BY DAVID LANDIS

and with whom I only had sporadic contact (mostly through Facebook)? I started talking with my pal and fellow graduate Rob Mitchell. He’s also gay and living in San Francisco; and we both sang together in concert choir back at Parkway West. As an aside, he asked me if people knew he was gay in high school and I said, “Not really.” But when I asked him if he thought people knew about me, he said, “David, everyone knew you were gay.”

I wish they’d told me that then; maybe I could have had more fun!

PHOTO CREDIT: MISSOURI HISTORICAL SOCIETY

High School Reunions: Friend or Foe?

Rob Mitchell, who is a member of the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus, and his husband Jamie Caban, with David Landis (left) at the Parkway West High School reunion.

Landis and Mitchell were classmates at the school, located in Ballwin, Missouri.

Here’s my hypothesis about the evolution of reunions. I think for the 10th reunion, graduates are still competing with each other, proving who did best, and still residing in those recent cliques. By the 20th, many of the folks are talking about their kids or showing off their latest far-flung vacation photos. By the 50th reunion, nobody cares! They just remember that we all have an important shared history that is worth celebrating.

At the more formal dinner the next night, a sobering memory wall reminded us how precious life is, and why every day is important. Approximately 10% of our large class of 630 people had passed away already. But the night had a jubilant overtone, with people connecting once again with folks they hadn’t seen in years. The program chair even asked your humble author to speak a bit, since I was voted “Most Likely to Succeed.” (I think that may just have been a fluke, because of my good grades.)

What did I come away with? I realized that I really was sort of popular back in high school.

The reunion brought closure, as well as a sense of well-being. Amidst all my insecurities, people responded to my “can-do” spirit, my sense of humor, and my ability to relate to people

(maybe this was because I felt like an outsider, since I was gay?). Perhaps that’s also why my longstanding profession prior to this column was in public relations? Who knows.

So, how about the restaurants and things to do in St. Louis? Here’s just a smattering, since we were only there for a long weekend, but St. Louis is worth a visit.

The Saint Louis Art Museum: Located in the verdant Forest Park smack dab in the middle of the city, this museum is the beneficiary of many industrialists who collected at the turn of the 19th century. That’s when St. Louis was one of the nation’s biggest and most economically significant urban enclaves in the country. You’ll see works of Picasso, Max Beckmann (who lived the latter part of his life in St. Louis), Monet, Seurat, Frank Stella, and more. The neo-classical building with its expansive and airy lobby, along (continued on page 37)

Bay Times Dines with the modernist expansion, is a stunner. Don’t miss the Panorama restaurant, overlooking the park. It’s a lovely, contemporary spot for a leisurely lunch where I enjoyed a glass (or two!) of clean Sicilian pinot grigio and a divine French omelet. And Sean loved his turkey sandwich with cranberry. The topper? A yummy profiterole with sweet cherries, hazelnuts, and chocolate sauce.

Herbie’s: This convivial brasserie, now located in Clayton, has an important LGBTQ+ history. For years, it was an upscale but friendly art deco gay bar, restaurant, and understated disco, run by Adelaide Balaban. Its original location was in the gay-friendly Central West End neighborhood of St. Louis. When I lived in St. Louis, the food was great, the cocktails even better, and I met several cute guys (and even a former Parkway West teacher!) there. The proverbial Herbie was Herb Balaban, who ran Balaban’s luxe and buzzy French restaurant down the street. Balaban’s was where everyone in St. Louis went to see and be seen, just like our now long-gone but still remembered Stars in San Francisco. The reincarnated Herbie’s retains the charm, as well as some of the old French posters in the former restaurants, in addition to the marble and brass tables and Eames-like chairs. And the food? Delicious! I was hesitant to order the salad niçoise (since, after all, this is the Midwest and not near an ocean), but the tuna was fresh, and cooked a perfect medium rare. Hubby Sean proclaimed his French dip sandwich juicy and tender, along with extra crispy thin French fries that you often don’t find in restaurants these days.

Gateway Arch National Park: This 1967 architectural wonder by Eero Saarinen is a must-see and must-do. At 630 feet, it’s the tallest monument in the U.S. Not only does it define St. Louis’ riverfront skyline, but also it is a symbol of this metropolis. At its important Mississippi River location, the city served as the gateway to the west beginning in 1806, following the Louisiana Purchase. Don’t just stare up at this graceful icon; take a ride up in its retro tram cars. When you get to the top, stare down, and you’re looking not at a building beneath you, but miraculously at thin air.

Toasted Ravioli: This is a St. Louis delicacy that must be tried while you’re in this burg.

Yes, it’s a fried ravioli served with marinara sauce—and yes, it sounds unhealthy, but it’s delicious. The Hill is the Italian neighborhood of the city and any of the places there will have great toasted ravioli, but

locals swear by Anthonino’s Taverna. According to St. Louis Magazine, “Even Guy Fieri, TV’s spike-haired diner doyen, rav-raved about this Greek-Italian taverna’s crunchy quadrates, made in house and ideally eaten at the antique, polished wooden bar. The combination of pecorino and ricotta with ground beef make for a particularly cheesy appetizer.”

So, to anyone considering whether to attend your reunion, I say,“Go!” You’ll learn a lot about yourself, reconnect with people who might surprise you, and most of all, you’ll have a good time.

Saint Louis Art Museum: https://www.slam.org/ Panorama Restaurant: https://www.slam.org/dining/ Herbie’s: https://herbies.com/ Gateway Arch National Park: https://www.gatewayarch.com/ Anthonino’s Taverna: https://anthoninos.com/ David Landis, aka “The Gay Gourmet,” is a foodie, a freelance writer, and a retired PR maven. Follow him on Instagram @GayGourmetSF or email him at: davidlandissf@gmail.com Or visit him online at: www.gaygourmetsf.com

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BOOK PASSAGE (continued from pg 32) Saturday, October 26 @ 4 pm (ticketed - Corte Madera store & online) Michael Connelly, author of The Waiting: A Ballard and Bosch Novel

Sunday, October 20 @ 4 pm (ticketed - SF Ferry Building store) John Stamos, author of If You Would Have Told Me In If You Would Have Told Me, John Stamos reflects on his journey from a young burger flipper to a beloved Hollywood icon, navigating fame, love, and loss along the way.

With humor and honesty, he shares poignant stories about friendship and the courage to embrace new beginnings, revealing the magic we must create for ourselves in life.

In The Waiting, LAPD Detective Renée Ballard reopens a cold case tied to the notorious Pillowcase Rapist. As she faces mounting challenges, including the theft of her badge, Ballard turns to Harry Bosch for help, while his daughter Maddie joins the investigation with her own hidden agenda.

Sunday, November 3 @ 1 pm (non-ticketed - Corte Madera store) Celia Imrie, author of Meet Me at Rainbow Corner

In Meet Me at Rainbow Corner, Olivier Award-winning and Screen Actors Guild-nominated actress Celia Imrie tells the heartwarming story of women working as dance hostesses for GI soldiers in 1944 London. Amidst the war’s chaos, Dot, a new nurse, and her friends find joy and romance at the vibrant Rainbow Corner social club, where they navigate love, loss, and a secret mission. Imrie will be joined in conversation by Fidelis Morgan. https://www.bookpassage.com/

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Upcoming Events

The campaign table at the corner of Market and Castro streets for Vice President Kamala Harris’ bid for the presidency was visited by San Francisco Bay Times lead photographer Rink earlier this month. Election Day is November 5.

As Heard on the Street . . . What is one of your favorite Halloween candies?

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Skylar Markham “Whoppers”

Salvador Tovar “Reese’s Bits”

Dawn Dzurillo “Candy corn”

Sister Dana Sez: Words of Wisdumb from a Fun Nun

By Sister Dana Van Iquity Sister Dana sez, “THE BEARRISON STREET FAIR is right around the corner. You don’t have to BE a bear to enjoy the fair—but do be a fan of the bears!”

We Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence (SPI) and the Bears of San Francisco (BOSF) invite you to join us for the 4TH ANNUAL BEARRISON STREET FAIR on Saturday, October 19, noon–6 pm at the intersection of Harrison and 11th streets.

The whole footprint runs from Eagle Plaza on Harrison to 10th Street. And on 11th up to Folsom. Set in the Leather and LGBTQ Cultural District in SoMa, Bearrison Street Fair is “A Fair for Every Bear.” All genders and body types are welcomed, encouraged, and celebrated! SPI and BOSF’s goal for Bearrison Street Fair is an inclusive event for adult members of the LGBTQ community by promoting body positivity and cultural diversity for all, fostering a supportive and welcoming bear scene. Enjoy burly entertainment, including attendee competitions—building off the fan-favorite wrestling stage and the buns-out deadlift competition. Or perhaps participate in the Bouncing Booties Twerk-Off Contest. Drag Contest? Mustache and Beard Contest?

Sooo many contests! The fair is free, but donations are always appreciated. https://www.bearrison.org/ Hosted by Honey Mahogany and Sister Roma, REUNION is an opportunity to gather to celebrate our vast queer past, honor the history makers who move our communities forward, and raise funds to keep LGBTQ history alive! Traditionally held in October to coincide with LGBTQ history month, Reunion is the GLBT HISTORICAL SOCIETY’s annual Gala. The 2024 event will include a reception, awards presentations, a silent auction, and the opportunity to connect with a wide range of LGBTQ history supporters. October 19, 5:30–9 pm, Marines’ Memorial Theatre, 609 Sutter Street. https://www.glbthistory.org/ Thirty-one days before Election Day, Vice President Harris was on the ground of North Carolina, surveying the devastating damage caused from hurricane “Helene” and offering solutions to work with FEMA. Meanwhile that same day, Trump was in Butler, PA, (where a while back he had gotten his teeny tiny widdle ear lobe shot at) spreading lie after lie about Harris and

Republican National Committee Co-Chair Lara Trump ( just since March 2024) scared the Butler, PA, pro-Trump audience (and anyone with a sense of reality). She screamed (on what must have been Opposite Day), “This is no longer a fight between Republican versus Democrat; left versus right; it is good versus evil; and good is going to win this battle!” Well, goodness! Mrs. Eric Trump really needs to hold up a mirror to see a severe case of vice versa there!

Sister Dana sez, “Here we clearly see Two Presidential Candidates with two very diametrically different qualifications! Get everyone to Vote Harris and blue down the ballot before the November 5 deadline!

Quoting marvelous Michelle Obama, ‘DO SOMETHING!’” In a much later New York Times personal live-on-tape session, Vance was asked FIVE TIMES by the host of The Interview, Lulu Garcia-Navarro: Did Trump lose the 2020 Election? He refused to answer all five same questions in a row—dodging each same question with a question—along with repeated attacks against “Big Tech.” Sister Dana sez, “THIS incredible incident provides powerful ammunition for the Harris campaign!”

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FEMA. And mouthy Musk was at Donnie’s side touting T-rump’s “bravery under fire.”

Lying, slick JD Vance had the audacity to shout out, “Donald Trump took a bullet for Democracy!” Sister Dana sez, “Oh, JDV, you’ve twisted it up again! No!!!

Democracy did NOT require that Donald be shot. Democracy does not require an assassination attempt!”

Sister Dana (aka Dennis McMillan) with community activist Juanita MORE! and designer Mr. David Glamamore on Friday, October 11, at The Hibernia attending Cleve Jones’ 70th Birthday Party

come to terms with end-of-life decisions for themselves and their loved ones, and its specially trained volunteers who discuss their roles as guides and, often, confidants. Jim Van Buskirk, the book’s editor and Final Exit Network regional coordinator, will be joined by a FEN senior exit guide and an anthology contributor. The discussion is targeted toward those preparing for end-oflife decisions; friends and family members searching for information on how to best support those individuals who are considering this choice; physicians and other healthcare providers; and those interested in the storied history of the Right-To-Die movement.

Well, it turns out that Corey DeAngelis, a “PROJECT 2025” collaborator and antigay far-right activist approved by Trump, is a former GayHoopla gay porn star named Seth Rose. A regular Fox News contributor, DeAngelis was on Fox promoting his Trump-endorsed book while disparaging the American education system for its tolerance and acceptance of gays and LGBTQ rights. Sister Dana sez, “How many more former LGBTQ people will be suddenly jumping onto the horrendous PROJECT 2025 bandwagon?! Hypocrisy runs wild in MAGA-ville!” (continued on page 42)

Join TRANSGENDER LAW CENTER for their annual SPARK event celebrating trans people thriving and fighting for liberation. Spark resources the trans- and BIPOC-led work—building power and demanding justice. October 18, 6 pm, Terra Gallery, 511 Harrison Street. https://transgenderlawcenter.org/ Come on out to the SANCHEZ STREET BLOCK PARTY on Sunday, October 20, 12–3 pm. It’s, of course, on Sanchez Street between Clipper and 26th Streets. Live music, food, dancing! Fun for the whole family, face-painting, arts & crafts, and more.

San Francisco Public Library is hosting the official book launch of There at the End: Voices from Final Exit Network—A Celebration of 20 Years with a discussion on October 22, 6–7 pm at Koret Auditorium, SFPL Main Branch, 100 Larkin Street, (lower level). The anthology, published in 2024, honors the 20th anniversary of Final Exit Network (FEN), an American nonprofit right-to-die advocacy group.

The group’s mission is to uphold that mentally competent adults who suffer from terminal illnesses, intractable pain, or irreversible physical conditions have a right to die legally and peacefully. The book is a collection of unique first-person accounts that explore the range of emotions and processes of Final Exit Network clients as they S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

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Castro Street Fair 50th Anniversary

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SISTER DANA (continued from pg 39) Sister Dana sez, “If you too worry about DarnOLD Trump’s declining cognitive abilities, search online for the exquisite October 7 issue of ‘NY Times’ with the heading: ‘Trump’s Speeches, Increasingly Angry and Rambling, Reignite the Question of Age.’ Dementia much? It will shock you with startling evidence why he should be required to step down and shut up!”

Everyone danced (well ... this nun hobbled in his new “gay purple” cane) and celebrated my amazing friend CLEVE JONES’ 70TH BIRTHDAY on October 11! What an appropriate day—additionally being

National Coming Out Day as well! The glorious evening was at the Hibernia Bank, 1 Jones Street as a fun fundraising opportunity supporting Cleve Jones and his tremendous legacy of activism with the SF AIDS Foundation and the AIDS Memorial Quilt—both cofounded by Cleve. Attending celebs included Juanita MORE!, Sister Roma, Our Lady J, Chris Housman, Anthony Wayne, and the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus. A Grand Procession with fanfare came from such groups as Royalty, AIDS Orgs, Drag Queens, Leather Folx, Comfort & Joy, us nuns, and more. For the grand finale, Cleve blew out his candles on this huge cake on fire! And we all got presents to wear in the presented by

STREETCAM

Small to Medium Hanging Decor $4.99–$49.99 Inflatable Sandworm $299.99 Wall Hanger Possessed Girl $249.99 Disco Scream Mask $32.99 pooky Season has officially arrived! Halloween decor from 6-inch skeletons to 9-foot Sandworms! We have everything you need to make your space spooky, fun, and festive! https://cliffsvariety.com/ SAN F RANCISCO BAY T I ME S

AIDS LEGAL REFERRAL PANEL (ALRP) is hosting its 41ST ANNIVERSARY ANNUAL RECEPTION on October 24, 5:30–8:30 pm at The Grand, 520 40th Street. This beloved tradition brings together hundreds of friends in the local legal community who make ALRP’s work possible. Proceeds support ALRP’s vital role in advancing and protecting the rights, dignity, and health of people living with HIV/AIDS in the Bay Area. I am excited to announce that former Mayor and Speaker of the Assembly Willie Brown will be a special guest to present Representative Barbara Lee with the “Clint Hockenberry Leadership Award.” Also honored will be two-time Emmy Award winner Bruce Vilanch and ALRP Panel Attorney since 2007 Michael Rooney.

Hilarious stand-up comedian and standout lesbian icon Marga Gomez will host.

Guests will enjoy an open bar with ample hors d’oeuvres. https://www.alrp.org/ Sister Dana sez, “Does anyone possibly believe Melania had suddenly come to reason in her new ‘memoir video’ upholding a woman’s right to choose—or much more likely slowly easing a teeny tiny ‘metaphorical knife’ into hubby Trumpy’s back?!”

http://sfbaytimes.com/

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form of beautiful buttons stating, “The AIDS Memorial Quilt: 35 Years of Love, Activism & Legacy.”

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Get into the Halloween spirit at HALLOWEEN PIANO BAR with Jason Brock and Dee Spencer entertaining you! Friday, October 25, 7–11 pm at Catch French Bistro, 2362 Market Street. NO TICKETS—just walk on in! Jason and Dee will perform some spooky smash hits mixed in with their standard, sometimes hilarious, and definitely awe-inspiring favorites.

Produced by OPENHOUSE SF, in celebration of LGBT HISTORY MONTH, will be a guided tour of the GLBT HISTORY MUSEUM in the Castro! October 30, 2–3:30 pm, 4127 18th Street. But you must RSVP at rsvp@openhousesf.org or call 415- 231-5871

Society on opening night of its newest production, The Murder at Haversham Manor. As the incompetent theatre troupe attempts to stage this 1920s murder mystery, their production devolves into madcap mayhem. Lost props, forgotten lines, and poorly constructed scenery conspire against the clumsy cast, who fight for the show to make it to the final curtain call. San Francisco Playhouse Producing Director and Cofounder Susi Damilano, who has staged sidesplitting spoofs at the Playhouse including Noises Off, Clue, and most recently The 39 Steps, helms this hilarious whodunit. The Play That Goes Wrong goes on—now through November 9 at San Francisco Playhouse, 450 Post Street. It’s a fun farce full of slapstick silliness. It would be Wrong to miss this! https://www.sfplayhouse.org/ THE DAY OF THE DEAD (Spanish: EL DÍA DE LOS MUERTOS) is a holiday traditionally celebrated on November 1 and 2, though other days, such as October 31 or November 6, may be included depending on the locality. The multi-day holiday involves family and friends gathering to pay respects and remember friends and family members who have died. These celebrations can take a humorous tone, as celebrants remember amusing events and anecdotes about the departed. The observance falls during the Christian period of Allhallowtide (I suppose that means All Hallow Eve or All Saints’ Day). The Day of the Dead is largely seen as having a festive characteristic. It is also common to give gifts to friends such as candy sugar skulls, to share traditional pan de muerto with family and friends, and to write lighthearted and often irreverent verses in the form of mock epitaphs dedicated to living friends and acquaintances. Sister Dana sez, “Happy Day of the Dead to Everyone who celebrates the Day—however they may!”

Sister Dana sez, “Happy Holloweenie to all you ghosts, goblins, and whoever dons whatever costume you will wear on October 31ST. Halloween is the Gay High Holiday—so celebrate in style!”

I see that among nine possible elementary school closures in San Francisco (due to some sort of alleged bankruptcy or deficits or other mysterious monetary matters), HARVEY MILK CIVIL RIGHTS ACADEMY ( just two blocks from my place in the heart of the Castro) is on the chopping block. Closure decisions will be final, they say, in December. Quoting the late, great Harvey Milk, “All young people, regardless of sexual orientation or identity, deserve a safe and supportive environment in which to achieve their full potential.”

Sister Dana sez, “This is a safe space for LGBTQ kids and families. Do NOT shut down Harvey Milk Civil Rights Academy—or feel the fiery wrath from this nun and fellow activists all over The City!”

LGBT HISTORY MONTH is an annual month-long observance of LGBT history and the history of the gay rights and related civil rights movements. It was founded in 1994 by Missouri high-school history teacher Rodney Wilson. LGBT History Month provides role models, builds community, and represents a civil rights statement about the contributions of the LGBTQ community. As of 2022, LGBT History Month is a month-long celebration that is specific to Australia, Canada, Cuba, Finland, Germany, Hungary, Italy, the United Kingdom, and the United States. It is celebrated in October to coincide with NATIONAL COMING OUT DAY (October 11) and the first MARCH ON WASHINGTON for gay rights (1979).

SAN FRANCISCO PLAYHOUSE kicks off its 2024–25 season with the Olivier Award-winning comedy THE PLAY THAT GOES WRONG. This fast-paced farce packed with inventive theatricality finds the Cornley Polytechnic Drama

Sister Dana sez, “Sorry I am so late in wishing everyone a HAPPY LGBT HISTORY MONTH, but I just learned about it myself. Dumb nun! Anyway, have a great one, and keep on making history!”