2011 11 03

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November 3-16, 2011 | www.sfbaytimes.com

The LGBTQ Newspaper and Events Calendar for the San Francisco Bay Area | July 28 2011

Senator Dianne Feinstein Speaks Out for LGBTQ Rights at HRC Gala

Shocking Report on Queer Domestic Violence Governor Signs

Gender NonDiscrimination Act

AB 887 was authored by Assembly member Toni Atkins (D-San Diego).

By Dennis McMillan

Senator Feinstein spoke optimistically during the HRC dinner on the status of LGBTQ rights legislation.

By Dennis McMillan Human Rights Campaign held its 27th annual Bay Area gala awards dinner at the Fairmont, featuring Senator Dianne Feinstein as keynote speaker. HRC President Joe Solmonese said, “This year has been nothing less than remarkable, and we’re only just getting started.” He continued, “There have been setbacks and speed bumps along the way, but we have accomplished more in the past two years than in the previous forty, I believe.” He noted in the last few years we have won marriage equality in six states plus the District of Columbia. He said we should remain optimistic about the eventual repeal of Prop 8 and DOMA. He cautioned, “If we don’t do everything to reelect President Obama, we are going to likely find ourselves right back in the f ight against the federal marriage amendment where we were seven years ago.” He added, “Obama may not have evolved as quickly as we’d like on every issue, but he has done more for our community than any president before.” Every one of the Republican candidates for president has signed a pledge against same-sex marriage, he pointed out, “and that means we must stand strong with Senator Dianne Feinstein.”

He introduced Senator Feinstein, giving a long résumé of Feinstein’s work for civil rights and full equality. Feinstein said she was proud that membership in HRC has gone up in the past seven years from 700,000 to 1,000,300. “I count on all of you to keep the pressure on Washington until we achieve our shared mission: equal treatment under the law for all LGBT Americans,” she said.

Feinstein gave a progress report towards that goal. She said she was “only one in a handful of senators who voted against ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ nine years ago in 1993.” She said the only qualifications for military service should be “courage, conf idence, and a willing to serve. Period.”

Feinstein said while Congress was successful in lifting the military ban, it was a very different story regarding marriage equality. “I believe strongly that the discriminatory Defense of (continued on page 21)

A new report on LGBTQH intimate partner violence reports an increase of 38.1 percent in 2010 over 2009.

By Dennis McMillan The National Coalition of AntiViolence Programs (NCAVP) has released its report, “Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer Intimate Partner Violence in the United States in 2010.” In 2010, NCAVP programs received 5,052 reports of IPV, an increase of 38.1% from the 3,658 reports in 2009.

The L A Gay & Lesbian Center (LAGLC) received additional funding for their IPV programming, accounting for a significant portion of the increase in reported numbers na-

tionwide. “In 2010, we were able to hire a dedicated staff person to focus on gathering information about local IPV incidents,” said Susan Holt, program manager, STOP Partner Abuse/Domestic Violence Program at the L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center.

“The increase in reports of intimate partner violence during this time demonstrates the tremendous impact that increased funding can have in allowing anti-violence programs to better support LGBTQH IPV survivors.”

The 2010 report highlights a number of disturbing trends. This year’s re-

port shows an increase in the severity of violence experienced by LGBTQ and HIV-affected survivors of intimate partner violence. In 2010, more than half of survivors (55.4%) experienced physical violence at the hands of their abusive partners - a substantial increase from 2009 (36.5%).

“Survivors can be subject to many types of violence by abusive partners, including threats, outing, stalking, and physical attacks. This year’s escalation in physical violence demonstrates the real danger that LGBTQH people face in violent relationships,” said Kelly Clark, Community Safety Program director from the Gay Alli(continued on page 4)

The Art of Living Mike Ward (1962 - 2011)

Mike Ward with one of his favorite cabaret stars, Carly Ozard.

By Mike Ward On July 19, Bay Times’ Jazz & Cocktails columnist Mike Ward slipped into a coma and died. Just days before, he sent me the first installment of what he hoped would be an ongoing column, “The Art of Living.”

They say that people who are dying always understand best what it means to live. Mike had lived with cancer for so long, he had mastered the Art of Living. His writing was a joy – a reflection of what a truly special man he was.

Mike’s friends will gather to remember him at an event called “Joy of Mike: A Memorial Service Celebrating the Life of Mike Ward.” It takes place Nov. 16 at the Jazz Heritage Center, 1320 Fillmore Street, SF. It runs from 6:30-9:30pm, a small sliver of time for such a remarkable human being.

Mike Ward in 2011 wearing a ready smile.

S o here it i s, Mik e’s la st column .

-Kim Corsaro December 20, 2010. I’m 48 years, 1 month and 21 days old on that day, waiting for some off icial news at UCSF Parnassus along with my partner, Michael, and my closest friend/ live-in caregiver/former partner, Daniel.

“Your prognosis is as we discussed earlier this week… 9 to 11 months to live,” my gastroenterologist says.

“Eleven months if you use Nexavar.

It’s the last and only treatment available to you. And it’s not 1 new tumor of 2.4 cm, it’s 2 tumors over 3.0 cm.

All surgical options are off the table.

Transplant, too. As are all liver-directed therapies, the treatments we’ve successfully used over the past few years,” she finishes.

48. 1. 21.

9 to 11.

1 of 2.4 cm> to 2 of 3.0 cm< Merry Christmas.

Happy New Year.

Joyous Winter Solstice.

“If there’s any travel you’d like to do, I’d suggest doing it now. And get your affairs in order. I’m sorry, I wish I had better news,” she adds.

I’m living the cliché of a movie. Living it, yes, but cliché nonetheless.

On many levels this news is not entirely unexpected. I was told on the phone December 15, 2010, though now we find it’s not one 2.4 cm tumor, but two tumors, both over 3.0 cm.

The 12/20/10 visit was a face-to-face formality to confirm that, yes, the tu(continued on page 21

Governor Jerry Brown has signed into law Assembly Bill 887, the Gender Nondiscrimination Act, which will strengthen employment, housing, and other civil rights protections for all Californians, particularly those who face discrimination based on gender identity and expression.

The bill was authored by Assembly member Toni Atkins (D-San Diego) and sponsored by Equality California, Transgender Law Center, and Gay-Straight Alliance Network.

“The Gender Nondiscrimination Act protects all Californians. No matter your skin color, your age, where you come from or whether you’re gay, straight or transgender; we are all protected by the same rights,” said Assembly member Atkins. “We share equal protection in employment, housing, and education. This bill ensures that no one is left out.”

While California antidiscrimination laws already define “gender” to include a person’s gender identity and gender expression, the Gender Nondiscrimination Act provides clarity to those who are victims of unlawful discrimination. It also specifies that business owners, employers, and other entities are required to comply with the antidiscrimination protections by explicitly enumerating gender identity and expression as protected categories in a number of state codes.

“All hardworking people in California, including transgender people, should have an equal opportunity to earn a living and provide for their families,” said Roland Palencia, former executive director for Equality California. “No one should have to live in fear of being fired from a job or denied housing simply because of who they are. The Gender Nondiscrimination Act ensures that the law is clear and folks who experience discrimination know they are protected.”

In 2009, the Transgender Law Center released its “State of Transgender California” report. The report revealed overwhelmingly that Californians who experience discrimination based on gender identity and gender expression at work or elsewhere often times do not file complaints because (continued on page 9)

Shanti Celebrates Nearly Four Decades of Service

P H OTO S B Y RIN K

man, who became a Shanti L.I.F.E. (Learning Immune Function Enhancement) client in 2005 and completed two L.I.F.E. health workshops.

As a volunteer, he completed the national training program and has peer facilitated Shanti L.I.F.E. health workshops for the past four years. In addition, he recently joined the staff part time as national L.I.F.E. program assistant.

Singer Connie Champagne, honoree Renee Heidtman, and State Senator Mark Leno at the Shanti Annual Benefit at the Hotel Nikko.

By Dennis McMillan Founded in 1974 by Dr. Charlie Garfield at the UCSF Cancer Institute, Shanti was one of the first-ever volunteer organizations to work with terminally-ill individuals, and later became one of the very first community-based HIV/AIDS organizations in the world. Shanti has trained over 15,000 volunteers in the Bay Area and 600 organizations worldwide in the Shanti Model of Peer Support.

Shanti Executive Director Kaushik Roy welcomed guests to the 37th annual awards dinner, “Compassion Is Universal,” at Hotel Nikko. He said the challenging times in which they operate have proven that their mission is as important today as ever before: “We are here to enhance the quality of life, health, and well-being of people living with life-threatening illnesses.”

Roy said in recent years that they have seen a significant increase in the need for Shanti’s services. “We offered support to over 2,400 cli-

ents last year, which included providing some of our most vulnerable neighbors with HIV/AIDS or breast cancer with care navigation, peer advocacy, treatment information, practical assistance, emotional support, and health enhancement and wellness programs.”

“Many clients consider Shanti to be their sole source of compassionate care. For staff, it is an honor to touch the lives of individuals who might otherwise be alone and without adequate medical care,” Roy said. “Whether we are supporting HIV positive clients in increasing their adherence to their medical regimens; making sure isolated, non-English speaking women get to their chemotherapy appointments; or simply being with clients who are too sick to leave their rooms, we are in a humbling position to see the difference we make every day.”

Three awards were g iven. The James C. Hormel Client Community Spirit Award went to John Weather-

2 BAY TIMES NOVEM BER 3, 2011

The Shanti Breast Cancer Client Community Spirit Award was given to Renee Heidtman. After a diagnosis of breast cancer in December 2009, at the age of 29, Heidtman‘s life changed drastically. Her yoga teaching and holistic health care career were put on hold, as she focused her energies on her medical treatment.

Along that path, she founded the Center for Peaceful Healing, offering low cost and donation based wellness workshops in the Bay Area including a weekly yoga class that she teaches in partnership with Shanti’s Breast Cancer Program and The Mindful Body yoga studio. She donates her time at the Center while still undergoing treatment for cancer.

The Charles A. Garfield Volunteer Leadership Award was posthumously bestowed upon Randy Allgaier who died at the age of 52 on November 27, 2010). Allgaier first connected with Shanti 23 years ago during a Peer Support Volunteer Training. During the training he met the love of his life, his husband Lee Hawn, and they were together 22 years, until the end of Allgaier’s life. He served at Shanti in many ways over the years, first as a volunteer, then as a board member in the early ‘90s, and later as director of the SF HIV Health Services Planning Council.

Kevin Winge Chosen to Lead Project Open Hand

By Dennis McMillan Veteran nonprofit executive Kevin Winge has been selected as the next executive director of Project Open Hand following a nationwide search.

Laura Smith, chair of the board of directors of Project Open Hand said he will begin his tenure with Project Open Hand on January 16, 2012.

“When we embarked on this search a year ago, we hoped to find someone who could honor the vision of founder Ruth Brinker’s meals with love, while leading Project Open Hand into the next frontier of that vision,” said Smith. “We have found that leader in Kevin Winge.”

Winge will be replacing longtime Executive Director Tom Nolan, who has led Project Open Hand for 17 years.

During that time, Nolan expanded the agency’s original mission, consolidated its San Francisco operations, and grew the programs in San Francisco and the East Bay. Nolan set an example of compassionate leadership that has made Project Open Hand a model nonprofit in the Bay Area and nationwide.

Winge comes to Project Open Hand after serving 12 years as the executive director of Open Arms of Minnesota in Minneapolis. During his tenure at Open Arms, he grew the organization to provide daily nutrition services not only to people with HIV/ AIDS, but also to people with MS, ALS, breast cancer, and more than 60 other life-threatening illnesses.

As a board member and former board president of the Association of Nutrition Services Agencies, Winge has worked to promote food justice

Kevin Winge will take over Project Open Hand on January 16, 2012.

and the availability of plentiful and healthful food for individuals and communities both in Minnesota and nationally. He has also led Open Arms to create international partnerships to provide nutrition services to people affected by HIV in Ethiopia, Namibia, and South Africa.

“I am delighted that Kevin Winge will be Project Open Hand’s next executive director,” Nolan said. “I have known and admired Kevin for many years. He is a kind, compassionate person, and he will bring years of experience in nutrition work to the agency. He is a real leader, and we are extremely fortunate to have Kevin come to Open Hand. The board has chosen wisely and well. Additionally, we will have an overlapping period where we will work together to ensure a smooth leadership transition for the organization.”

“It is an honor to follow Ruth Brinker and Tom Nolan as executive director of one of the most respected and loved nonprofits in San Francisco,” said Winge.

Paid for by Dennis Herrera for Mayor 2011, FPPC#1331135

THE ONLY CANDIDATE FOR MAYOR ENDORSED BY THE ALICE B. TOKLAS CLUB(1) AND THE HARVEY MILK CLUB(2)

“Dennis Herrera is a true believer in equality-forall who has the knowhow to make the dream a reality.”

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BAY T IM ES NOV EM BER 3, 2011 3

Guest Editorial — Bevan Dufty, candidate for Mayor 2261 Market Street, No. 309 San Francisco CA 94114 Phone: 415-503-1386 Fax: 415-503-1389 www.sfbaytimes.com E-mail: editor@sfbaytimes.com STAFF Dr. Betty Sullivan

On the campaign trail, I’ve told San Franciscans that running for Mayor is an amazing experience.

Since September of 2009 I have been in every corner of this City, meeting voters and experiencing our incredible diversity and understanding the challenges -- whether it’s lack of a job, difficulty keeping a business open, or frustration over Muni or inability to gain admission to a quality public school.

More than a decade ago I worked closely with these public housing residents, even holding monthly town hall meetings to address basic problems. It was difficult to see that conditions have worsened in so many aspects from the physical condition to the number of families I met that had lost a child or sibling to gun violence.

Public housing is high on my agenda and I want

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I’ve never felt someone has to vote for me simply because I’m Gay. But I believe that becoming Mayor will make a difference.

Mayors set urban agendas and my work as District 8 Supervisor shows my agenda: establishing small business, economic development and first-time homebuyer programs at the LGBT Center; partnering with Larkin Street and LYRIC to create the Castro Queer Youth housing collaborative; funding and support for HIV/AIDS services and prevention; our Transgender Economic Empowerment Initiative and other services for Transgendered San Franciscans; support for LGBT-led families; programs addressing Crystal Methamphetamine and recognizing the importance of our history through the establishment of the GLBT Historical Society’s Castro Museum.

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I have recognized and respected that the LGBT community is not a political monolith. My campaign has been about respectfully asking members of my community to consider my accomplishments as well as my goals in running for Mayor.

Because of my experience as a Supervisor and Director of Neighborhood Services, I believe that we can fix the big picture by focusing on the basics.

In thousands of ways over 18 years, I have kept faith with the public by addressing problems big and small.

One of the lessons I learned was about the greatness of people who work for the City. How important it is to treat our City employees with respect and support - and how we can foster a culture of excellence that translates into better Muni, cleaner and safer streets, better parks and public spaces.

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So when I talk about being a bus and rail yard Mayor it’s because the human capital is so important when our biggest challenge is that an operator isn’t showing up for one out of every eight shifts -- causing delays and costing millions.

I have also loved focusing on the entire City and one of the major issues for me has been a Black Agenda for San Francisco. We love our City’s diversity but over the past generation San Francisco has become increasingly unhealthy and unwelcoming to our African American population.

African Americans comprise only 6% of our City’s population and outcomes for African Americans in terms of education, employment and health lag significantly. Black unemployment is at 20%. This past Saturday I was at Sunnydale, our largest public housing development in Visitacion Valley.

to create Life Campuses at public housing in conjunction with universities so we have rich programming around skills, employment and healthy living. I also want to have artists-in-residence at public housing so that sculptors, painters, photographers, among others, are able to offer positive activities for youth and seniors as they pursue their craft in our City.

As a Gay man who is running to break a glass ceiling and be the first SF Mayor elected from the LGBT Community I have been heartened to receive endorsements from Sing Tao, our largest Chinese-language newspaper (#3); Latino Democratic Club (#2); and a host of endorsements from African American leaders, elected officials and organizations.

ance of the Genesee Valley. “This rise in severity demonstrates the critical need for mainstream service providers and first responders such as the police, emergency responders, medical providers, counseling services, legal services, and domestic violence shelters to have LGBTQH-specific competency.”

NCAVP documented six IPV deaths in 2010 consistent with the six documented murders in 2009. Of these six victims, four identified as female.

“We are deeply concerned by this ongoing high level of reported deaths,” said Tre’Andre Valentine, the director of Organizing and Education at the Network/La Red. “As of this report’s release, NCAVP has already

documented and responded to seven LGBTQH IPV deaths in 2011. ” NCAVP is also releasing “Voices of Victims and Survivors: Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer and HIV-Affected Intimate Partner Violence Narratives 2010.” This additional narrative brings to light the severity of IPV within LGBTQH communities, in hopes of raising awareness and increasing the ability for LGBTQH community members and allies to understand IPV. The 2010 report indicates that LGBTQH survivors of IPV encounter a lack of access to safety and support when they experience violence.

More survivors in 2010 (44.6%) were turned away from shelter than in

As a proud, out parent - I will stand up to the bullies whether they are in the halls of Congress or in the halls of our nation’s schools.

Your #1 vote gives me the best chance to win this election and advance our community and our City. I want to thank the Bay Times for giving me their #1 recommendation.

2009 (34.8%). Additionally, in 2010, NCAVP saw 54.4% of survivors seeking an order of protection were denied one. “Lack of access to shelters and other supportive services increases a survivor’s risk of immediate danger and puts their lives at risk at a critical moment,” said Chai Jindasurat, National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs coordinator at the New York City Anti-Violence Project. “Policymakers need to increase support and safety for LGBTQH survivors by preventing all service providers from discriminating against sur vivors based on sexual orientation or gender identity.”

Additionally, fewer survivors called the police. In 2010, 7.1% of survivors called the police for support -

a decrease from 2009 where 21.7% of survivors called the police, indicating reluctance on the part of LGBTQH survivors to seek assistance from law enforcement. “Community-based organizations should create programs and campaigns focused on the prevention of LGBTQH intimate partner violence that work within communities, such as community accountability programs, as well as those that work within the criminal legal system,” said Lisa Gilmore, director of Education and Victim Advocacy at Center on Halsted in Chicago.

“The greater number of options we create to address this violence, the more LGBTQH people we will be able to reach.”

The “We Don’t F#*@ Around” Person of the Week - Masen Davis fessionals. Another report found that one in four transgender people live below the poverty line. And transgender Californians with a bachelor’s degree earned 40 percent less than nontransgender residents.

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This is a decade that will see us continuing our fight for LGBT-equality, immigrants rights, and supporting working people. I am proud to fight for all of these causes and see the ability to build coalitions advancing all of these important causes.

(DOMESTIC VIOLENCE continued from page 1)

CALENDAR

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As Mayor, I can engage Mayors of other cities, that may not have strong LGBT elected or political leadership -- and encourage them to do a better job meeting the diverse needs of their community.

Masen Davis is the Executive Director of the Transgender Law Center (TLC). TLC was one of the principal organizations responsible for the passage of AB 887 this year, the Gender Nondiscrimination Act (see page 1).

Under his leadership, TLC is helping the world to understand the plight of

4 BAY TIMES NOVEM BER 3, 2011

transgender people. In 2008, TLC conducted a survey of 650 transgender adults in California. They found that one in five has been homeless, 67 percent have been discriminated against on the job, and 30 percent have postponed healthcare due to discrimination from healthcare pro-

But it is not enough for Masen to advocate only for transgender people, he has been forceful in identifying those who suffer most within this discriminated group. He has focused the energy and resources of TLC on transgender adults and youth of color and speaks fervently about violence, police harassment, income gaps, educational disparities, depression and suicide.

For more than 20 years now, he has been a tireless LGBTQ activist and advocate. He grew up in the Midwest and moved to California in 1995. Prior to joining TLC, he lived in Southern California, working for the Unit-

ed Way. In 2002, Masen cofounded the FTM Alliance in L.A. Visibility for transgender issues has risen dramatically in the last few years due to the fearless efforts of people like Masen. Masen Davis and TLC are attacking discrimination with every tool available to them, from community-based programs for transgender people on healthcare access, legal counsel, homeless services and safe schools, to walking the halls of power in Sacramento to change California’s laws.

For speaking for those who cannot.

For fighting relentlessly for some of the most oppressed and marginalized people in our society. For leveraging legal acumen and compassion to raise a community up. We name you, Masen Davis, as our Person of the Week.

The Week in Review

By Ann Rostow

Brothers and Sisters

Friends Don’t Let Friends Write Amicus Briefs

Speaking of marriage, the bad guys in New Hampshire have decided to focus all their energy on repealing the same-sex marriage statute and have abandoned the idea of a passing an antigay constitutional amendment.

The Prop 8 panel of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit just accepted a friend of the court brief on same-sex marriage written by a 20-something conservative recent law school graduate named Gage Raley.

Mr. Raley insists that he has found an original constitutional argument to support bans on same-sex marriage, and he seems awfully proud of himself.

His idea closely tracks the main objection to same-sex marriage, specif ically the notion that the state

I suppose this is good news, but honestly I don’t think an amendment had a snowball’s chance in Texas to pass.

Not only do Granite State citizens oppose reversing marriage rights, but you need a two-thirds majority to ratify an amendment in New Hampshire.

However, the repeal bill is almost as bad as an amendment. It ends mar-

“I almost feel sorry for these guys, many of whom must have recognized that they were gay, but made a conscious decision to marry and live their lives in the closet. Now they’re hitting middle age and realizing that years of living a lie erodes your character like decades of smoking blackens your lungs. ” should favor heterosexual marriages since men and women can have children together. Raley notes that the presumption of paternity accorded a married father under current law would not apply to same-sex couples.

(Cue trumpet fanfare.)

Raley spends about 60 pages isolating this minor element of the already f lawed anti-marriage arg ument, seemingly convinced that he alone has discovered the key legal distinction between gay and straight couples.

The court accepted his brief after both sides had no objection, which makes you wonder just how easy it is to load up a federal appellate panel with friendly advice. Could you and I have submitted an amicus brief?

Perhaps we could have employed Mr. Raley’s own argument, by pointing out that although heterosexual paternity is easily determined by DNA tests, same-sex couples need marriage rights in order to make sure that their children have two legally recognized parents. Or why not go out on a limb? Maybe ancient aliens encouraged same sex couples to make monogamous commitments back in pre-history. Maybe they’ll be back to make sure humankind followed their instructions. I’m sure there are some runic texts on the subject.

Do you ever watch “A ncient Aliens” on the History Channel?

I have to confess a dark secret. I don’t believe in para-normality as a rule, but I’m half convinced by these TV episodes. How else could the (insert old civilization here) have moved all those 100-ton boulders up to the top of the giant mountain? And why else did the old cave painters draw all those astronauts, complete with space helmets? The only thing that gives me pause is the Greek “expert” on the subject with the crazy mop of black hair. He doesn’t seem quite sane to me.

riage rights for same-sex couples and institutes a bizarre civil union that could include siblings and, well, whoever. I’m assuming that the measure will not pass, and that if indeed it manages to slither out of the legislature, it will not survive a promised veto from Governor John Lynch.

Meanwhile, do not forget about Iowa next week! I know I’ve crunched this story into ort-ville over the last month or two, but it is still underreported in the GLBT press.

On the off chance that some of you have not been faithful readers, I’ll remind you that marriage equality in the Ethanol State may hang on next week’s special election for a state senate seat. Democrats now hold a twovote edge in the upper body, an edge that has allowed us to beat back efforts to put an antigay amendment on the ballot. Iowa has been one of the six states to offer marriage equality ever since the state supreme court ordered the change in 2009.

If Democrats lose next week, if the tie in the state senate leads to power sharing, if the legislature votes for an amendment in two successive sessions, if the Iowa voters roll back marriage in 2014 or whenever--- well, that will be that. I know there are a lot of “ifs” in that sentence, but still. How much easier it would be to just win the seat and avoid the cascade of possible setbacks in the first place.

Plus, Election Day is always a thrill.

But if you don’t live in San Francisco, or in some other city where a mayoral seat is up for grabs, next week’s showdown is pretty lame stuff. At least Iowa gives the rest of us something to root for.

Aside from Iowa, I’ll be watching Mississippi’s vote on whether or not a fertilized egg is a legal human being.

Hello! What next? Are we going to recognize the innate value of sperm?

Professional Services Watch out, gentlemen. Remember Onan!

I know that here in Texas we tried to pass a law that would have forced women not simply to have an ultrasound before getting an abortion, but to have that ultrasound narrated by the technician. Actually, the law was passed, but struck by a court, as were similar statutes around the country.

So let’s cut to the chase. You know those computer programs that let you figure out how a six-year-old kidnap victim would look at age 20? Why not mandate that women who seek abortions be presented with a family photo illustrating what she and the unborn fetus will look like at his or her college graduation? I made this suggestion many years ago in this column, but it deserves repeating.

Bad Mayor, No Donut It’s a slow news week for our community, so bear with me while I ramble down roads normally not taken. For example, I’m delighted to report that reader Mark Liolios sent me two links to the GOP sexcapade story that I couldn’t remember last week.

The star of the show was Chris Myers, the 40-something Republican mayor of Medford, New Jersey. Married with kids, Myers is accused of hiring a guy to hook up with him during a trip to California last year. The mayor allegedly promised to help his paid companion with some gifts or a car or something, but Myers failed to come through, provoking Rent Boy to take the tryst public.

Myers ducked a question about his sexual orientation from a local newspaper the other day, but he denied the gist of the story and pledged not to resign.

I almost feel sorry for these guys, many of whom must have recognized that they were gay, but made a conscious decision to marry and live their lives in the closet. Now they’re hitting middle age and realizing that years of living a lie erodes your character like decades of smoking blackens your lungs. Time for the Chantax. Chantex?

Poor Eric Let’s rip to shreds a few TV commercials, shall we? First, the sophomoric ad for the electric car, where the nasty little boy accuses the driver of stopping at the gas station only to use the bathroom. The boy’s obnoxious.

What business is it of his why the guy came to the gas station? Maybe he was buying gum. Who cares if he has to use the bathroom? Is that shameful? And, assuming it’s not, why is the driver slightly embarrassed? What ad executive came up with this ludicrous scenario anyway?

Second, I’ve been meaning to object in print to the smart phone ad that revolves around a taco party in the office. To begin with, I’ve spent years working in offices, and no one’s ever thrown a lunch party in the hallway outside someone’s off ice door. But the most offensive thing about this commercial is the horrendously rude treatment of “Eric,” one of the staff members who received a timely invitation to the party (thanks, one assumes, to his choice of cell phone).

“You invited Eric?” asks the dimwit with the ineffective phone. “I thought Eric gave you the creeps.”

What a thing to say in front of Eric!

Who would do that? Not only is Eric (continued on page 21)

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BAY T IM ES NOV EM BER 3, 2011 5

On November 8, Join the Harvey Milk LGBT Democratic Club in Supporting these Candidates and Ballot Measures The San francisco Gay Democratic Club was founded by Harvey Milk and his supporters in 1976. The Club was renamed in Milk’s honor after his assassination in 1978. Over the subsequent thirty-five years, the Club has been a leading force in progressive politics in San francisco: fighting for aiDS funding in the eighties, advancing domestic partnership legislation in the nineties, defending public services, pushing for transparent and ethical government, and championing affordable housing today. We invite you to learn more about us at www.milkclub.org

THe Harvey MiLk LGBT DeMOCraTiC CLuB eNDOrSeS

Ballot recommendations Take this with you to the polls

M ayOr

#1 Choice for Mayor

(rank up to three choices)

#1 Choice – John avalos #2 Choice – Leland yee Or #2 Choice – Dennis Herrera

JOHN avaLOS a New vision for a Working San francisco

DiSTriC T aT TOrNe y #1 Choice – David Onek #2 Choice – Sharmin Bock SHeriff #1 Choice – ross Mirkarimi

#2 Choices for Mayor

PrOPOSiTiONS SuPPOrT

[X]

LeLaND yee

DeNNiS Herrera

[X] [X]

OPPOSe

Prop. a

School Bonds

Prop. B

road repair

Prop. C

real Pension reform

Prop. D

[X]

Prop. e

[X]

Prop. f

[X]

attack on Workers

rOSS MirkariMi for Sheriff

DaviD ONek

SHarMiN BOCk

#1 Choice for

#2 Choice for

District attorney

initiative repeal

District attorney

Consultant Ordinance

[X]

Prop. G

Local revenue

Prop. H

real Consensus. real Pension reform.

Phony School reform

The Harvey Milk LGBT Club | www.milkclub.org | Paid for by the Harvey Milk LGBT Democratic Club PAC FPPC# 921683

6 BAY TIMES NOVEM BER 3, 2011

[X]

National News Briefs New York City – NYC to Open Nation’s 1st LGBT Senior Center - 10.17

Holland, MI – Michigan Pastor Arrested for Gay Rights Protest - 10.20 The Rev. Bill Freeman was arrested Wednesday in Holland for protesting the city’s lack of a gay rights antidiscrimination ordinance in an action inspired by Occupy Wall Street.

I think sometimes the only thing you can do is civic disobedience,” he said, according to the Grand Rapids Press. “I hoped it wouldn’t come to this. I don’t know what else to do. I’ve tried everything else.”

Source: The Advocate

New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg and the New York City Department for the Aging (DFTA) announced that Services & Advocacy for GLBT Elders (SAGE) has been awarded an Innovative Senior Center (ISC) contract to open the nation’s first full-time center for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) older adults.

The city contract represents another historic government funding breakthrough for SAGE and LGBT older people. In January 2010, SAGE - in partnership with 10 aging and LGBT organizations nationwide - received a historic grant from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services and the Administration on Aging to establish the National Resource Center on LGBT Aging, the country’s first and only technical assistance resource center aimed at improving the quality of services and supports offered to LGBT older adults.

Source: SAGE

S a n D i e g o – L e s b i a n s C r ow n e d A m e r i c a’s F i r s t Same Sex Homecoming King & Queen - 10.29 Two California high school students became one of the first lesbian couples crowned homecoming king and queen in the nation this weekend.

Rebeca Arellano, a senior at Patrick Henry High School, was made the school’s first female homecoming king when her name was announced Friday at a pep rally.

Adams and Arellano both came out their freshman year of high school, and they began dating in Februar y of their sophomore year. Both say their parents were supportive both when they came out.

Source: Huffington Post

Washington D.C. – Every Child Deserves a Family Act - 10.28 New York’s junior senator Kirsten Gillibrand is sponsoring federal legislation to lift the ban on gay couples and individuals adopting children. “This legislation would open thousands of new foster and adoptive homes to children ensuring they are raised in loving families,” Gillibrand said of her “Every Child Deserves a Family Act.” New York, particularly New York City, has led the nation in allowing gay individuals, and now married gay couples, to become foster and adoptive parents. But 11 states currently ban gay individuals and same-sex couples from adopting. Some conservative groups have fought the idea, arguing homosexual parents cannot provide a sound family.

Washington D.C. – Gay troops to file suit challenging Defense of Marriage Act - 10.26

Source: The New York Daily News

The suit also challenges provisions of federal code regarding spouses that lawyers said bar gay couples from accessing benefits provided by the Pentagon and the Department of Veterans Affairs. Those benefits include military identification cards, access to bases, recreational programs, spousal support groups and burial rights at national cemeteries.

Local News Briefs Battle for Gay Vote Intensifies in SF Mayoral Race Over Allegations City Attorney Opposed Newsom Marrying Gays – 10.26 The battle for the gay vote in the San Francisco mayoral race is getting a bit ugly as four former officials, speaking anonymously, say that City Attorney Dennis Herrera was an “obstruction” to then mayor Gavin Newsom’s decision to marry same-sex couples in 2004. Herrera is running in part on his record working for same-sex marriage.

But four senior members of Newsom’s inner circle at the time say Herrera was initially strongly opposed to Newsom’s decision to start marrying same-sex couples in February 2004, a defining chapter in the city’s recent history that helped reframe the national debate over marriage equality.”He was not even passively supportive. He was an obstruction,” one of the sources said. Several said they are speaking out now because they were upset

by Herrera politically benefiting from the issue. Newsom is backing Herrera opponent Ed Lee in the mayoral race.

Source: San Francisco Chronicle

Gay and lesbian service members and veterans filed suit last week challenging the constitutionality of the federal ban on gay marriage and federal policy that define a spouse as a person of the opposite sex. The 1996 law called the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) bars federal recognition of same-sex marriages performed in states that allow them.

Source: The Washington Post

Supervisor Wiener Seeks to Replace Plague Stolen from Harvey Milk Plaza – 10.31 It was first reported on October 21 that the Harvey Milk bronze plaque in the Harvey Milk plaza had been stolen.

In an update to that news, Supervisor Scott Wiener has begun a replacement project with the city’s DPW in response to the theft of the Harvey Milk plaque that was mounted at the Harvey Milk Plaza MUNI underground entrance at the corner of Market and Castro streets.

“This plaque is an iconic part of the history of this neighborhood,” Wiener said. “It’s been there for almost 30 years, and it really means a lot to the community.”

Activist Cleve Jones’ exploration of the site did not find even one surveillance camera, and protector of the Castro SFPD Sgt Chuck Limbert agrees with Jones that the plaque was probably stolen for its recycling metal value.

Limbert instigated a search for the symbol of Harvey Milk’s legacy by the SFPD and other law enforcement agencies. Activist and Café Flore manager Gary Virginia suggested that reward be offered to facilitate the plaque’s return.

Source: Rink

LGBT studies major to be available at CCSF - 10.31 Faculty at City College of San Francisco is working to create an associate’s degree major in lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender studies, the first of its kind in the country.

According to Ardel Thomas, CCSF’s chair of the LGBT studies department, it is appropriate for City College to offer a major in LGBT studies because it was the first institution of higher learning in the country and second in the world to develop a department in the field.

Once the state community college board in Sacramento approves City College’s proposal to allow the major, Thomas said students who enroll next semester will be able to take courses in the department that will count toward an associate’s degree in LGBT studies.

Currently SF State, UC Berkeley, UC Davis, UC Santa Cruz and Stanford are among the four-year universities in the Bay Area that offer degrees or certificates in LGBT studies. SF State offers a minor in LGBT studies, but not a major.

Source: Golden Gate Xpress BAY T IM ES NOV EM BER 3, 2011 7

Professional Services

Ask an Attorney DPAHC executed in or before 1992 is now legally ineffective.

Legal Advice Helene Wenzel Q: I recently changed my health care provider and went to see my new doctor. On my first appointment she asked me if I had an Advance Health Care Directive. What is it; why should I have it; and how do I get it?

A: Without comment on your former doctor’s practices, your new doctor is obviously more responsible and concerned about your well-being. Here’s what you need to know. If you haven’t time to read all, skip to the nextto-the-last paragraph for the practical information.

Prior to 2000, California had a Durable Power of Attorney for Health Care form which basically authorized a person (“agent”) nominated by you to make health care decisions for you when you lost the capacity to do so.

These DPAHCs were effective for a limited period of time after which they expired automatically. A ny

In 2000, California passed the Health Care Decisions Law which revised its Durable Power of Attorney for Health Care law and updated rules governing health care decision-making on behalf of persons lacking capacity to make decisions about their medical/ health care, including incompetent adults, and persons receiving treatment in mental health care facilities.

The form has been modified several times since 2000, but in a nutshell: The new law created a model form entitled an “Advance Health Care Directive” (AHCD) that can serve as both your health care instructions to doctors and family; and as a power of attorney nominating a person (“agent”) you trust to take charge of your health care if and when you don’t have the capacity to communicate with doctors.

With a properly filled out and executed Advance Health Care Directive, which must be executed while you have mental capacity (that means NOW!), you authorize this agent (and alternate agents if you so choose) to communicate with your medical providers, request and be entitled to see medical records, make decisions about your daily medical care; and represent your wishes regarding long-term and end-of-life care. Your named agent will also have the responsibility and authority to make anatomical gifts, authorize an autopsy and direct the disposition of your remains when you die. However, this

agent will not have authority to pay for or direct payment for any of these or medical costs. If you lack capacity to handle your own finances, they will have to be managed by an agent (the same or another person) under a duly executed, notarized Durable Power of Attorney for Property and Financial Management, a separate document. (CA Probate Code 44004465).

Here’s the good news! You do not need an attorney to complete this form. Many PPOs, HMOs and hospitals have the form; if they don’t offer it, ask for it. The California Medical Association (www.cmanet.org) offers a very comprehensive, understandable descriptive booklet (in large print!) which includes the form for a nominal cost.

In order that the form be legally effective, you must either have it witnessed by two persons when you sign it, or sign it in the presence of a Notary Public. (If you are in a skilled nursing home, the Ombudsman must be present when you sign this document).

And, finally, a COPY should go to your medical provide.

Helene V. Wenzel is a solo practitioner in Estate Planning and ElderLaw. She also handles Domestic Partnership and LGBT issues. If you have a question that you would like Helene to answer in this column, write to her at wenzellaw@sbcglobal.net.

The D List People who a re Bet t y Bu zzk i l l?

People who not only don’t encourage you, but plant seeds of doubt?

I suppose the real question is, if you have people like this in your l i fe… why is t hat? W hy do you keep these people? What’s in it for you?

A Better Life Linda Kay Silva I get asked a lot about how to put the Law of Attraction into play in someone’s life when they have so many people around them exudi ng negat iv it y a nd pessi m ism. I think this question plagues many of us in our daily lives as we look around and see people who do not help us live our best life. Just the other day, as I was getting ready to play tennis, I was chatting with m y o p p o n e nt . W h i l e w e w e r e chatting, she said “I just f ind that most people will disappoint you.”

After the match, her words haunted me. I wondered about the kind of people she must have in her life i n order to ma ke t hat k i nd of a statement. Then I started thinking about how the people in our l ives can eit her help us l ive our best life or hinder us from living our best life. They either support and encourage the creat ion of a wonderful place to be, or they are roadblock s. T hey eit her add or subtract.

Advertise in our Holiday Guide Email us at ads@sfbaytimes or call 415-577-6422 8 BAY TIMES NOVEM BER 3, 2011

Do you have people in your l ife who const a nt ly d isappoi nt you?

Do you have people in your l ife who suck the light out of a room instead of adding it? Do you have people i n you r l i fe who seldom cont r ibute f u l ly to you r world?

As Lori and I were cleaning her closet in order to donate t h ing s w e h av e n’t wor n or h av e outg row n, I t hought about how interesting it is that we will get rid of those inanimate objects that no longer add to our world but we will continue to hold on to those ind iv idua ls who not only do not add to our mental and emotional well-being, but often are a detriment to the joy and happiness we are seek ing. A nd why is that? Is it because we don’t like change?

Or is it because we simply do not have the guts to cut people loose who no longer have a place in the world we are trying to create? Remember, we’re t r y i ng to create and establish the very best life we can. This is the only one we get.

As far as any of us know, this is a one show on ly per for mance…so we need to go for the gold. However, it is a ma zi ng to note how ma ny people we k now who a re w i l l i ng to set t le for t he bron ze.

How many people are w illing to have det ractors not on ly on t he per i meter of t hei r l ives , but i n their inner-circle. Ask yourself… are you one of those people? Are you sett l ing? A re you w i l l ing to accept crumbs from people when you deserve so much more?

I f you a r e t r u l y c om m it t e d t o raising your life up to the highest degree possible, can you do that, r e a l i st ic a l ly, w it hout t he r i ght k ind of suppor t? A nd what does the right kind of support look like to you? Ask yourselves what is it you a re w i l l i ng to accept f rom

your friends and family? Then ask yourself why? Are you not worthy of hav ing t he r ight k ind of sup port, love, and nurturing that you need on t h is i ncred ible jour ney you’re taking? I think you are.

Somet h ing wonder fu l happened to me on my way to my 50th birthday. I woke up. I looked around me at t he people who, more often t han not, were dragg ing me u nder i n stead of l i f t i ng me up.

I moved t hem to what L or i and I refer to as the D List. This list helped me deter m i ne who add s and who subtracts from my life.

Those who do not add any positive, meaningful, or joyful way to my world don’t get to be in it. I’m going to say that again because it is rea l ly impor tant: t hey do not get to be in my life. Do you see attitude I’m sporting? I can be this way because I believe that being part of my life is a privilege, just as it is a privilege for me to be a par t of my fr iends’ and fami ly’s worlds. If someone does not add or help me live my best life, then they are like that jacket I no longer want to wear. It doesn’t f it me anymore. They don’t f it me or the d irect ion I a m head i ng, so why am I keeping them around? The truth is, by getting rid of people who bring darkness into my world allowed me to spend more quality time with those who brighten it, w it h t hose who f i l l my hear t w it h joy and laughter. By doing so, I’ve been able to nurture and m a i nt a i n m y r e l at ion s h i p s f a r better than I ever had because the negativ it y is gone…relegated, as it were, to the D List.

D o you h ave p e ople who nee d to land on that list? If you truly wa nt to l ive you r best l i fe, you have to clean out your closet.

Local Organizations Raise Money to Raise Community Up

P HOTO BY RIN K

for mer Super v isor Beva n Duft y to preserve the site for anti alcohol, anti cr ystal meth, and other meetings. When the chorus singers’ voices faded the diners turned t hei r at tent ion to a n ex ten s ive si lent auct ion. It was un ique to many shoppers because wine and erot ic DV D’s were missing from t he d isplay tables. A lcohol’s exclusion was understandable to the g uests, but the complicated connection between erotic f ilms and liv ing sober resulted in caut ious outsiders’ questions.

Actor George Takei accepts the Horizon’s 2011 Visionary Award at the Fairmont Hotel.

Hor izon’s Di n ner Honor i ng George Takei – October 1

By Sister Dana Van Iquity Horizons Foundations held its annual gala at the elegant Fairmont Sa n Fr a nc i sco for “A Per fec t ly Su ited Even i ng ” to suppor t t he LGBT communit y. The evening began w it h a cockta i l recept ion a nd a s i lent auct ion , a nd a f ter memb er s of t he S a n Fr a nc i s c o Gay Men’s Chor us sang, fol lowing t he sit- dow n por t ion of d inner, attendees enjoyed a decadent dessert buf fet and casino-themed p a r t y i n t he le g e nd a r y Ton g a Room.

D u r i n g t he d i n n e r p or t i o n o f t he ga la, Hor i zons honored actor George Ta kei w it h t he 2011 Visionary Award. Best known for his role as Mr. Sulu on TV’s “Star Tr e k ,” he h a s b e en de e pl y i n volved in civic af fairs throughout his l ife, includ ing LGBT r ights, politics, and Japan-United States relat ions. In his acceptance, Ta kei spoke of h is sem i- ser ious c a mpa ig n to do aw ay w it h t he slur, “That’s so gay” and instead r e p l a c e it w it h h i s n a me t h a t rhymes with “gay,” to say, “That’s so Takei!”

S en at or M a rk L eno c a l le d t he works of Horizons foundation “a stor y of hope, and courage, and survival, but more than that it is rea l ly a love stor y for our par t-

ners, our family, and our friends, and the community.” He said Horizons helps the community “live a l ife l ived w it h d ig nit y and respect and honesty; and no matter what our adversaries might put in front of us, no matter how hard they try to defeat us. We will triumph.”

Castro Country Club Dinner – October 15

By Rink G ue s t s of t he C a s t r o C ou nt r y C lub wer e fol low i n g t u xe do e d Gay Men’s Chor us member s on Castro Street to t he club’s Harvest Fea st on Oct . 15 u nt i l t he singers abr upt ly stopped. There was a shrine to their fallen memb er S c ot t D owdee at 18 t h a nd Castro Streets and they encircled it to sing a tribute to him and to his dedication to the group.

T he Ha r vest Fea st is t he major f u nd ra isi ng event for t he club’s “ Save t he Steps i n t he Ca st ro” campaign, is named for the steep steps in front of the club. It is a high tension spot where provocative men take of f their shirts and m a ke i nt en s e e ye c ont a c t w it h passing sight seers. T he club bu i ld i ng was recent ly sold, a nd the members have the support of t heir parent organ izat ion Ba ker Places, A ssembly ma n Tom A mmiano, State Senator Mark Leno, S u p e r v i s or S c ot t W i e n e r, a n d

Gay mayoral Bevan Dufty spoke passionately about t he necessit y of t he c lub b e c au s e t o o m a ny queer yout h come to Sa n Fra ncisco for accept a nce a nd a sa fe place to live and instead become addicted to crystal meth and f ind themselves sleeping outdoors.

Project Open Hand Dinner – October 25

By Dayna Verstegen Bay Times Publisher Betty Sullivan hosted an enthusiastic crowd at P ican restaurant last week to r a i s e mone y for P r oje c t O p en Hand. The event was sponsored

by NAPA Cellars Winemaker.

It was a prestigious room full community leaders including A meripr i se’s JoA n ne Jord a n a nd J i m Rosenau, NA PA Cel la r s’ Wi nemaker Joe Shirley and marketing d i rector Rebecc a F i ne, Si ster’s Steppin’ Organizer Pegg y Moore, communit y organizer Gar y Virg inia, Communit y Women’s Orchest r a B oa rd P resident , A n it a Engel, PI NCC founder Dr. K ay Taylor, author Kathleen Archambeau, Bob Brennenman, t he d irector of development and Board Member Mari Metcalf for Project Open Hand.

Pican delivered excellent ser vice a nd a t a st i ng menu t hat wou ld sat isf y even t he most a rdent fo o d y, i nc lud i n g bl a c k p e p p er crusted and smoked duck breast, c h a nt e r e l l e mu s h r o o m , b a c o n a nd a r u g u l a s a l a d , c of fe e a nd ch i le r ubbed t r i-t ip stea k , a nd the “West Coast Hillbilly Cheese P l ate” t h at i nc luded pa r mes a n waf f les that were TO DIE FOR.

(GOVERNOR SIGNS NONDISCRIMINATION continued from page 1) they are unaware that they are pro- documents. The law simplif ies the tected by nondiscrimination laws. current process transgender people must follow to obtain a new birth cer“The rights of transgender Califor- tificate to reflect their gender, requirnians are coming out of the closet,” ing only that transgender individuals said Masen Davis, executive direc- receive medical certification from an tor of the Transgender Law Center. attending physician that they have “Thanks to the fair-minded legisla- undergone “clinically appropriate ture and Governor Brown, employ- treatment.” ment posters and student handbooks will finally inform transgender people “The Vital Statistics Modernization of their rights, and educate employers Act eliminates outdated and onerous and schools about their responsibili- barriers that transgender people face ties.” He concluded, “It’s about time.” when trying to update their IDs,” said Davis. “Having identity documents More than 100 cities across Cali- that match who we truly are is critifornia and hundreds of employers cal to our ability to work, travel, and already provide clear nondiscrimi- thrive.” nation protections based on gender identity and gender expression. Cities Equality California is one of the largthat list them as separate protected est statewide lesbian, gay, bisexual, categories in nondiscrimination or- and transgender rights advocacy ordinances include Los Angeles, San ganizations in California. Over the Diego, San Francisco, Santa Cruz, past decade, Equality California has Oakland, and West Hollywood. strategically moved California from a state with extremely limited legal “All students deserve the opportu- protections for LGBT individuals to nity to attend school without fear of a state with some of the most comdiscrimination,” said Gay-Straight prehensive civil rights protections in Alliance Network Interim Execu- the nation. Equality California has tive Director Laura Valdez. “We are passed more than 70 pieces of leggrateful to Governor Brown for sign- islation and continues to advance ing this law to ensure that confusing equality through legislative advocacy, legal wording will no longer stand electoral work, public education, and between California’s transgender and community empowerment. gender-nonconforming students and their right to a safe learning environ- The Transgender Law Center is at the ment.” heart of a movement of transgender people, their families, and allies who Governor Brown has also signed recognize that struggles for equality into law Assembly Bill 433, the Vital and authentic self-expression are all Statistics Modernization Act, which connected and related. streamlines the process for Californians to obtain and update birth cer- The Gay-Straight Alliance Network tificates. The bill was authored by As- (GSA Network) is a national youth sembly member Bonnie Lowenthal leadership organization that empow(D-Long Beach) and sponsored by the ers youth activists to fight homophoTransgender Law Center and Equal- bia and trans-phobia in schools by ity California. training student leaders and supporting student-led Gay-Straight Alli“The government belongs to trans- ance clubs throughout the country. In gender people as much as it belongs California alone, GSA Network has to anyone else,” said Assembly mem- brought GSA clubs to 56% of public ber Lowenthal. “California’s records high schools, impacting more than belong to Californians. It’s as simple 1.1 million students at 850 schools. as that.”

GSA Network’s youth advocates have played a key role in changing laws The Vital Statistics Modernization and policies that impact youth at the Act brings California law governs local and state level. GSA Network changes to birth certif icates, and operates the National Association of other identif ication documents in GSA Networks, which unites more line with standards set by the United than 30 statewide networks of GSA States Department of State for gender clubs throughout the country. GSA changes on passports. It will allevi- Network is also a founder of the Make ate the confusion, anxiety, and even It Better Project, which aims to stop danger transgender people often face bullying and prevent suicide. when seeking changes to identity

See more Stories @sfbaytimes.com

As Heard on the Street . . .

Who are you voting for in the mayoral election on November 8?

Amy

Icarus

Michelle

Kyle

James

“I am supporting Mayor Ed Lee because he is the least corrupt and most down to earth. ”

“I am voting for Bevan Dufty because of gay rights, and he supports him without reservation.“

“I support John Avalos because he believes that San Francisco’s Poet Laureate should receive financial rewards.”

“I am for Bevan Dufty because he would be a strong gay example to the rest of the country. Plus he is the best because he is level headed.“

“I will vote for Dennis Herrera because of after all of the selfsatisfied sound bites it would be nice to have someone honest and effective.”

BAY T IM ES NOV EM BER 3, 2011 9

Accidental Game Show Contestants

Heidi Beeler It’s not l i ke I t hought we were appea r i ng on t he Cha rl ie Rose S how. I ’v e d one publ ic - a c c e s s TV before. I’ve been interviewed by emcees with stage names like Chablis and Judy Joy Jones, been upst a ged by bu rlesque d a ncer s in red bustiers, and had my face done by volunteer makeup artists who clea rly bel ieved in Ta m my Faye Baker as the gold standard in face painting. I’m not entirely green.

But I did think it was a talk show when I accepted Delicia Niami’s ema i l inv it at ion to promote t he San Francisco Lesbian/Gay Freedom Ba nd’s Da nce - A long Nutcracker® on her show in San Jose a nd a r r a nged for t he P resident of t he Board, Ju l ie Wi l l ia mson, to appea r w it h me. I d id t h i n k that actual talk ing would occur.

So shoot day, last Monday, when Delicia called me at work to clarify that talking about the DanceA long wouldn’t f it the show’s format since Do the Hustle is a 70s Gong-Show-style game show, I’ll ad m it I w a s st u n ned . C ou ld n’t you ju st pl ay s ome Nut c r a c ker music, she asked?

P HOTO BY J UDIT H SE AL E Y

Brass Tacks

L et me pause a moment here to say t hat event planners and aud ienc e memb er s a lw ay s a s k u s that sort of thing. “Can’t you just play [f ill in the blank here]?” The ready ava i labi l it y of prerecorded music going back to the malt shop jukebox has led folks to believe making music is as simple as pointing to a number and clicking a button. It’s like ordering a hamburger - you forget when you pick the #3 that somebody somewhere had to raise an ent ire cow f irst.

T h i s m i s u nder st a nd i n g i s p erpetuated by programs like Glee, where excited singers bound onstage as the psychic horn section p o p s out h a r mon i z e d b a c k u p s w it hout k now ing what song was going to be sung. This is not the real world.

Heidi Beeler (left) posed with the Elvis impersonator and NAME from the Gay & Lesbian Freedom Band in San Jose.

In the real world, most musicians, I’ll call them the 99%, don’t play by ear. We need sheet music, music that needs to be arranged for t he i n st r u ment s per for m i n g it .

For example, you can’t take an orchestral arrangement and throw it at a B a nd b e c au s e we don’t know what to do w ith the v iolin and v iola parts. I explained this to Delicia – told her that playing Nutcracker music on her show was completely impossible. Our music was arranged for a 50 -piece wind ensemble, and we had conf irmed for her show one f lut ist ( Ju l ie), one t r umpeter (me) at around 6 hours before showtime.

Del icia told me t he show wou ld a i r t h rough December a nd t he emcee wou ld ma ke sure to plug the Dance-A long. I said f ine, we’d make it work ( December 10 and 11; www.DanceA longNutcracker. com).

I ca l led Ju l ie, a nd we d id what a n yone d o e s i n a n e me r g e nc y

situat ion: we empt ied our pocket s a nd pooled resources. I had a col lect ion of g iant Nutcracker head s ou r t r u mpet sect ion h ad worn at past Dance-A longs. Julie tossed into t he pot her par t ner, Sue L eona rd i. Luck i ly, she had t he foresight to l ive w it h one of t he Band’s best tr umpeters, and she also had the number for Taka Aoki, one of the Band’s lead f lutes who lives in San Jose. Two trumpets, two f lutes, four giant heads – our ha nd wa s look i ng a l it t le better at 5 hours, 45 minutes before the show.

medians, trained animals, magicians, female and male impersonators, acrobats, illustrated songs, jugglers, one-act plays or scenes f r om pl ay s , at h let e s , le c t u r i n g celebr it ies, m inst rels, a nd movies.” From what I saw, that largely summed up the talent pool lined up outside the studio. A little pirate girl skipped around. A longha i red g u it a r ist i n a Chr ist mas sweatshirt and elf ears strummed a warmup. A Sarah Palin double i n a f la me cock t a i l d ress pr acticed reciting a Charlotte Bronte poem.

R i ko B ay we a r i n g a fo ot- h i g h afro wig, introduced us. My head bounced of f t he door fra me, wh ic h m a de t he jud g e s l au g h , and I had to squat to get into the studio. A giant mirror ball hung above a psychedelic dance f loor.

We ran up to the microphone and played the Reed Pipe dance, the f lutes playing a duet on the pastoral theme and the trumpets coming in in duet on the center section. We took turns spinning and dancing when we weren’t playing, because that’s what you do at the Dance-A long Nutcracker.

A s we entered t he CreaT V st udio facility that night, I expected our giant Nutcracker heads would stand out in the crowd, but eyeing the other contestants, I realized we’d landed on Ca lv in and Hobbes’ P l a net of t he Wei rdos a n d w e ju s t b le n d e d r i g ht i n .

Those who say Vaudeville is dead haven’t been paying attention to public-access TV. Wikipedia says Vaudeville includes “popular and classical musicians, dancers, co-

A professional Elvis impersonator in a white jumpsuit walked over and started talk ing shop. He referred to his costumes with names that sounded like car models. He was wea r i ng t he W h ite Concho t hat night, and he conf ided you can’t make a living in Vegas as an Elvis, because you can’t throw a stone without hitting one.

T hen t he jud ges – Jeremy Ko erner in av iator glasses, Samant ha Bar tholomew in a red gow n and Mona Lot Moore, looking an awful lot like Cher – closed their open mouths and in rea lit y-T Vstyle, took turns laughing at our per for ma nce. We were rel ieved w e w e r e n’t “ Hu s t l e d ” o f f t h e show, and in the end, we placed second! And we danced the Hust le w it h t he dancers and a l l t he crazy contestants. Groov y baby!

A round 10 pm, we were f i na l ly w av e d i nt o t he s t ud io. E mc e e

ELECTION ENDORSEMENTS george gascÓn

✔First Choice

Dennis Herrera for Mayor

✔Second Choice

Bevan Dufty▼ for mayor MAYOR – RAnked endORseMent

Choice #1: DENNIS HERRERA Choice #2: BEVAN DUFTY ▼

sOLe endORseMent

District Attorney: GEoRGE GAScÓN

Final Fix and Repair sign art.pdf

1

8/17/11

10:47 AM

YES

A – Fix Our Schools

YES

B – Fix Our Streets

YES

c – Real Consensus Pension Reform

YES

E – Fix Our Broken Ballot Measure System

YES

F – Better Public Disclosure

YES

G – Preserve City Services

M

Y

CY

K

Paid for by Alice b. Toklas LGbT Democratic Club PAC, FPPC #842018.

sheriff

C

CM

CMY

Choice #3: ED LEE

chris cunnie

BALLOt MeAsURes

MY

Sheriff: cHRIS cUNNIE

.

District attorney

NO

▼ Indicates that the candidate is LGBT.

D – Deceptive Political Shenanigans

NO

H – Deceptive and Flawed Boondoggle

www.alicebtoklas.org VOTE November 8 10 BAY TIMES NOVEM BER 3, 2011

Arts&Entertainment Afield Wins Best of SF Fringe 2011 Annette Lust In Linda Ayres Frederick’s Afield, the winner of the 2011 Best of Fringe, we encounter Samuel, a grouchy farm worker busily digging into the earth.

He is joined by Miriam who, as she returns to where she grew up now fearfully walks among land mines. As Miriam questions Samuel she learns that he is ceaselessly preoccupied with digging to forget and find something to satisfy his hunger. After they aid a wounded squeaking pig nearby, Samuel dreams of devouring pork ribs.

Miriam refuses to kill the wounded pig and is wounded by an exploding land mime. And, as in a fairytale, we watch Samuel succeed in sewing her head back onto her neck.

Samuel has begun to warm up to Miriam and asks her to dance with him.

The dramatic conf lict intensifies as Pig shows his affection for Miriam and protects her, warning her, like a good fairy, to be beware of Samuel.

At one point Pig bursts out in a happy pig song in which he takes on human qualities and even speaks. The piece reaches a dramatic climax as Samuel insists that Miriam choose between himself and Pig. During a confrontation between Miriam and Samuel, Miriam is nearly killed, but saved by Pig who retaliates and strikes down Samuel. A f lood with a fairytale like ending brings

solace to the grim reality of their despairing world.

Expertly directed by Joe Weatherby on an almost bare minimal set, we view a ragged tent and sundry objects such as ribbons, a miniature Eiffel Tower, makeup and other trinkets in Miriam’s back pack (set and props by Anna Dal Pino). The actors are dressed in worn out clothes with an inventive Pig’s mask for Pig who wears pink porcine workingman togs (costumes by Wes Crain). Gun shots and other menacing sound effects by Reid McCann play an important role in establishing a menacing ambience.

The ensemble and individual actors (Heidi Wolff as Pig, Carolyn Doyle as Miriam, and Bruno Kanter as Samuel) are emotionally and dramatically convincing. Wolff has captured the animal like quality in her challenging role of Pig in which she squeals and snorts authentically but with body movement that at times could be more mammal like to match her amazing squeals and snorts.

PHOTO BY ARN IE L ERN ER

Theater

Bruno Kanter (left), Carolyn Doyle (right) and Heidi Wolff (below) in Afield by Linda Ayres Frederick

All in all this tale is a thought provoking tragi-comedy combined with and gently softened by a dose of fairy tale fantasy and humor as it realistically warns of devastating things to come.

Afield replayed on Oct. 1 at the Exit’s Best of Fringe, 156 Eddy Street, San Francisco after its four Fringe shows and will be reprised at some time in the future (phoenixtheatresf.org).

Ms. Ayres Frederick will be previewing some of her solo work at the Marsh, SF on Valencia Street Mon-

day November 7 and 21st at 7:30pm.

Further info at themarsh.org.

understand the dynamics of personal relationships in my life.

Interview With Playwright Linda Ayres Frederick AL: Did you have an initial intention in creating this play? Did you intend to create a fable relevant to our demoralized world fearful of global destruction?

I find that this play that mirrors our despairing world and realistically predicts things to come contains humor and elements of fantasy that soften what could be a more devastating depiction. Could you comment on this interesting balance between realism and fantasy?

LAF: Actually much of the material in the play came from my own anxieties about the world when I first started writing it back under the Bush administration as well as trying to

Much of what I see as real is only a manifestation of people’s initial dreams and fantasy. What we see as “real” be it an automobile, a computer, or a play were all originally

just someone’s fantasy or dream. So, they are very much connected in my “reality”.

Is the play’s end with a f lood in which Miriam soars above the waves on Pig’s back intended to represent Miriam’s salvation through Pig? Very much so. As Pig has said, she can swim for long periods of time.

Pig represents more than just the animal survival instinct in us all. She is also connected to the female side that is nurturing and that responds to nurturing.

The Last Romance is a Romantic Comedy for All Ages in San Jose Theater

Jeanie Smith

PH OTO B Y K EVIN B ER N E

Joe DiPietro's The Last Romance, currently running at the San Jose Rep-

ertory Theatre, is an amusing piece about love that happens later in life.

The central question posed in the program asks, "Is it ever too late for love?" and the play answers it rather obliquely, giving us a portrait of romance that may seem unlikely on the face of it, but rings true with charm and wit.

Ralph (Will Marchetti) is excited to find out Carol (Kitty Winn) has surprised him with tickets to the opera in San Jose Rep’s regional premiere of The Last Romance.

We meet Ralph ( Will Marchetti), clearly a "Senior," as he waits on a park bench for something or someone, fending off the remonstrations of his overly protective sister, Rose (Sharon Lockwood) and the distraction of numerous dogs. Soon we discover why he wanted to wait - enter Carol (Kitty Winn), also "Senior" and attractive dog owner. Turns out Ralph had spotted Carol on a previous walk and has been staking out the dog park hoping she would appear again so that he could devise an excuse for meeting her.

ship? There are issues - aren't there always? The ending may or may not be happy, but the ode to love is writ large here, with operatic accompaniment and dramatic plot twists.

It's an uphill battle, at first - Carol seems far from interested in meeting anyone - but Ralph persists, and a relationship develops by fits and starts.

Funny how we find ourselves rooting for Ralph almost immediately; something about wanting to see him succeed, wanting to see romance happen - it must be ingrained in our social fabric, like why we cheer when we see a public proposal and acceptance.

Lockwood does well with the somewhat strident Rose, especially when she gets a chance to show some vulnerability and softness. Joshua Jeremiah rounds out the cast as "The Young Man," a dreamy vision of Ralph in his younger days, when he aspired to sing opera on the stage of the Met. At first the character seems somewhat superfluous, but his connection to the action begins to become clear, and his superbly rendered arias add drama and poignancy. The "larger than life" feelings associated with romance that are expressed in opera speak perfectly to the drama happening for Ralph and Carol.

As the relationship grows, encounters obstacles, and blossoms, we cheer more for the hope that's embedded in the fledgling romance. Ralph and Carol generate endearment and empathy, and it's late in the day for both of them. Why shouldn't they succeed and enjoy whatever time they have left in the joy of loving companion-

Clever dialogue and charming characters are fleshed out by excellent actors all around. Winn and Marchetti are well-matched in types and chemistry, and each has the flawless comic timing that comes with experience.

It's a treat to see veteran actors having such good fun with each other and with well-written characters.

The set, by Michael Ganio, is as clever as the dialogue, creating several spaces with economy, but is also lushly

romantic, with just the right touch of autumn. Beautiful lighting by Daniel Meeker softens the edges and bathes Ralph and Carol in a wistful aura.

Elizabeth Poindexter's costumes tell us volumes about the characters.

In short, it's a gem, a thoroughly entertaining evening, with plenty of humor, gorgeous music, excellent acting, and a touching story. I have a quarrel with the play's end, but you may not feel the same. You'll just have to see it for yourself and decide if you agree. You won't regret it.

What: The Last Romance, by Joe DiPietro, presented by San Jose Repertory Theatre Where: 101 Paseo de San Antonio, San Jose 95113 W he n: Tuesd ay s -Wed nesd ay s at 7:30pm, Thursdays-Saturdays at 8:00pm, Saturday matinees at 3:00pm, Sunday matinees at 2:00pm; through Nov. 6 Tickets: $10 - $74, 408-367-7255 or at www.sjrep.com.

Write to Jeanie Smith at jksmith614@ gmail.com.

BAY T IM ES NOV EM BER 3, 2011 11

Gay Men’s Chorus Hosts Musical LUSCIOUS The Fundraising Gala HAPPENINGS

Featuring Stephanie Teel & the Average Dyke Band on Saturday November 19, 2011 at Rooster’s Road House, Alameda, CA Pre-Event: $11.00 / Door: $15.00 - Online Pre-Event Tickets Available Now at bettyslist.com

P HOTO BY RIN K

“Luscious Live!” is a new East Bay music dance event featuring leading performers of the Bay Area's LGBT Community and friends. All are welcome.

YOU ARE INVITED! Conductor Timothy Seelig, Grand Duchess Kylie Minono, and ED Teddy Witherington at the Crescendo Gala at the Four Seasons Hotel.

By Rink

Celebrating Doc Misha Cohen's

60th Birthday

A Life Well-Lived

Contributing to the Care & Wellbeing Of Our Community for 30 Years Wednesday, November 17th 6:00 PM - 7:00 PM - Program 7:00 PM - 9:00 PM - Birthday Party

Come and Join the Fun! In Conjunction with the "Betty's List" Literary Salon Duboce Park Cafe 2 Sanchez Street (@ Duboce) San Francisco The evening also includes featured author KG MacGregor, Lambda Literary Award-wining author of Out of Love and the recently released Motherload.

T he S a n Fr a nc i s c o G ay Men’s Chorus hosted a unique brunch at the Four Seasons Hotel. The Crescendo Fundraising Gala event in one of the city’s most stylish hotels started at noon, a time of the day on Sundays when many are nursing hangovers at home. The chor us drew an amazingly large turnout for a quiche and fruit parfa it br u nch, w it h accompl ished musical performances and awards for the organization’s supporters.

Chor us g uest s who a r r ived ea rl y e nj o y e d c o c k t a i l s a n d hor s d’o euv r e s on t he hot e l t er r a c e that overlooks the Contemporary Jewish Museum’s huge tilted blue cube. The chorus’ two ensembles, the Lollipop Guild and the Vocal Minority, kicked of f the party and

The chor us’ new Human R ights Ch a mpion Awa rd wa s g iven to H a r vey M i l k’s nephew, St ua r t , by chor u s boa rd pres ident M ichael Tate and executive director Teddy Witherington for his advocacy of LGBTQ rights worldwide.

M i l k’s d ay job i s work i ng w it h at-risk youth and he founded the Harvey Milk Foundation to f ight hate and discrimination.

From his base near Ft. Lauderdale M i l k resea rches a nd t hen v isit s communities - from Spain to Turkey to San Jose Pride - where he can do the most good. The “Dear Harvey, We’ve Got Hope” project video was introduced by Witherington and then screened. Young

people are being asked for their feelings about Milk and their submissions will be formed into musical creations for the chorus’ upcoming 35th anniversar y season.

Board president Tate then spoke about fund ing for t he organ ization for the future.

A u n ique t a le nt , c ou nt er t e nor Jacques Snyman then performed, impressing the audience with his ma scu l i ne look a nd h igh notes.

D iageo A mer ica s’ (a subsid ia r y Sterling Vineyards) Phillipa Jones s a id t h at t hei r c om m it ment t o t he L GBTQ com mu n it y i s s i ncere when she accepted a Corporate Champion Award. The Bay A rea Reporter received a Media Champion Award.

The guests were thanked by event co - cha i r s Pau l Ol sen a nd S ea n (continued on page 16)

Competitors Announced for Dancing With the Drag Stars

By Sister Dana Van Iquity “Dancing with the Drag Stars” is back for its third year and will be more exciting than ever on Nov. 13, 5:30 - 11:30 pm at Ruby Skye. Queen of the Ballroom Donna Sachet and cohost Patrik Gallineaux are introducing eight new drag stars and their ballroom champion partners who will compete for the tiara’d disco ball trophy. Drag stars are Anya Munro (costar of “The Drag Life”), Gillette Thebestamancanget (Miss Gay San Jose 2011), Kit Tapata (drag king Mr. Gay San Francisco 2011), Lychee Minnelli (Miss GAPA 2011), Patty McGroin (Miss Gay San Francisco 2011), Miss Rahni (Miss Gay Northern California 2010), SF Empress XXXI Cockatielia, and Victoria Balenciaga (costar of “The Drag Life”). They will cha-cha, rumba, and waltz their way toward victory with their champion ballroom partners (Robbie Tristan, Raphael Dominguez, Steve Vasco, Tianne Frias, Heintje Soriano, Photis Pishiaras, Ricardo Tellez, and Jeremy Blake).

San Francisco legend Bebe Sweetbriar returns as head judge along with new additions Atlantis superstar and comedienne Shann Carr and international man of comedy Ali Mafi.

From Broadway’s Burn the Floor and America’s Ballroom Challenge, the panel welcomes Vaidas Skimelis along with dance partner Jurga Pupylete, together one of the most honored international Latin couples in the world today. Rounding out the judging panel is star of Broadway’s The Color Purple and American Idol finalist LaToya London. Sister Roma returns as VIP hostess and scrutineer.

12 BAY T IMES NOVEM BER 3, 2011

launched the positive mood of the part y and impressed the gathering of donors.

LaToya London (Color Purple, American Idol) will be one of the judges for DWTDS.

The world’s most original vodka Stolichnaya is the presenting sponsor and all proceeds benefit The RichmondErmet AIDS Foundation. Watch for special guest performances by dance music diva Caroline Lund and Anita Cocktail, and surprise celebrity appearances throughout the evening.

Experience the spectacular lighting and sound when drag meets dance drama and excitement on November 13th at Ruby Skye!

To introduce the event to the public, Stoli recently presented their Chocolat Razberi Launch Party at The Café in the Castro with fabulous chocolatey fun … music, drag stars, performances, and guest Stoli Mixology Master David Ruiz. The décor was completely raspberry red, so of course Sister Dana dressed wimple & veil to toe in raspberry red. Delicious Chocolat Razberi Stoli voddie specialty cocktails were served free to the patrons to discover this brand

new flavor. Several of the “DWTDS” contestants put on a special show.

Patrik Gallineaux, the LGBTQ Stoli liaison, acted as emcee. Lychee was Liza Minnelli in full Liza costume lip-synching her “Come to the Cabaret.” Gilette did Donna Summer doing “Last Dance, Last Chance for Romance.” Kit did the male version of “Don’t Hate Me Because I’m Beautiful.” Anya did Whitney Houston and “I’m Your Baby Tonight.” Miss Rahni danced up a storm with whirls, twirls, and high kicks. Warning: she’s gonna serve up some fierce competition.

All these drag stars and more will contend for the big title in the ballroom dancing competition to be held at Ruby Skye, located at 420 Mason Street. For tickets, visit richmondermet.org or patrikpresents.com or call the Richmond-Ermet box office at (415) 282-5492. This is a sexy samesex dance-off not to be missed!

FILM

Chatting with Felicity Jones, Who is Crazy About

Like Crazy

ruits f m o r “F s” to nut

CASTRO

FARMERS’ MARKET UPCOMING EVENTS:

Oct 26: Kids’ Day! Dress up for the market, stalls will be decorated, and there’s a free pumpkin giveaway at the info booth.

Nov 9: Food Drive. Thru Nov 16 IN SEASON: Apples, Artichokes, Beets, Bok Choy, Broccoli, Brussel Spouts, Carrots, Chard, Cucumber, Eggplant, Figs, Garlic, Lettuce, Melon, Mushrooms, Onions, Pears, Peppers, Persimmons, Pomegranates, Potatoes, Raspberries, Strawberries, Winter Squash, and Tomatoes.

WHAT ELSE: Bread, Cheese, Honey, Hot Foods, Meat, Orchids, Smoked Salmon, Soaps, Sorbet.

WEDNESDAYS

Anton Yelchin and Felicity Jones in Like Crazy, a romantic drama about an English student in a relationship with an illegal immigrant.

v isa g uidel ines, and is later unable to return to the States. Like C ra z y c h r on ic les t h i s lon g d i s tance relationship over the ensuing years. The Bay Times met with Jones to talk about her f ilm, her cha r acter, a nd her t hought s on relationships.

GK : W h at at t ra ct ed you t o pl ay in g Anna? She can be very self ish and unsympathetic.

Film Gary M. Kramer I n t he roma nt ic d ra ma, L ik e Crazy, Felicity Jones plays A nna, an English student at a Los A ngeles college who develops a passionate romance with Jacob (Anton Yelch in). T heir relat ionsh ip h it s a s n a g howe ver when s he w i l l fu l ly d isrega rd s her st udent

FJ: That’s what I worried when I f irst watched it. I thought everyone’s going to hate t h is person.

What I liked about her is that she pursues the g uy. It’s by her own volition that the relationship happens, which is more unusual than what we usua l ly see - a nd t hat t here i s a n element of i n sa n it y about her. I liked the idea of this p er s on b e i n g c omplet e l y overwhel med i n ever y sen se by a n-

ot her human being, and w i l ling to make huge sacr if ices because of that - almost as if she can’t live without that person.

4PM - 8PM

OPEN THRU DEC. 21

T he drama pivots around your character deciding to overstay her student visa. I wonder if it would have served the f ilm better had she not articulated her decision…

NOE ST. BETWEEN MARKET ST. & BEAVER ST.

It’s funny you say t hat, because that was the hardest scene for me!

It was so dif f icult that she is that pre-meditated in making her decision. We spoke at length about that, but in a way, that’s her character. She’s very willful. She acts, rather than thinks. If she makes a decision about somet hing, she follows it through. I’m much more cautious than Anna. I like to take my time over things. I’m Libran, so I always reduce anything, any s it u at ion , t o a c hoic e b et we en

1.800.949.FARM

pcfma.com/castro

(continued on page 17)

Tenth Annual Transgender Film Festival is Here! ing performances by Annie Danger, Natasha Muse, Storm Miguel F l o r e z , B ut c h Ta p, K e nt u c k y Fr ied Woma n, Shaw na V i rago, Eli Conley and more – hosted by Fairy Butch. The festival continues Fr iday and Saturday Nov. 4 and 5 with the Weekend Film Festival - two dynamic programs of local, national, and international short f ilms and v ideos by transgender and gender variant artists from more than a dozen countries around the world.

Loop Planes is about 13-year-old Nick who lives with his Dad at an amusement park

Film Sister Dana Van Iquity The San Francisco Transgender Film Festival (SFTFF ) announces its spectacular 10th anniversar y f i l m fest iv a l – a stel l a r col lect ion of t r a nsgender shor t f i l ms w it h ent ici ng t a les of def ia nce, bul ly ing, relat ionships, sex, humor, enchantment, and romance.

This year’s festival begins Nov. 3 a nd feat ures a n awa rd-w i n n i ng m i x of inter nat iona l f i lms from c ou nt r ie s i nc lud i n g T h a i l a nd , Australia, Brazil, Israel, Canada, T ha i l a nd , G er m a ny, S cot l a nd , England, South A frica, and The Netherlands.

Shot in an amusement park, Loop Planes t a kes a young F T M pro tagonist on the romantic ride of his life. The documentar y, Death of My Daughter, is a poignant and honest account of female-to-male transgender people and parental

reject ion. Room mates, st a r r i ng Rocco Kay iatos, is a poetic tale of unrequited love. “Transsexual Dominatrix” is a super-saucy music video from transgender rocker Shaw na V i rago. T h e Pa nt y Ma n st a r s Sha ngela L aqu i fa Wad ley from Ru Paul’s Drag Race fame.

M a i s o u M e n os ( Mor e or L e s s) from Brazil is a tale of queer high school bullying with a twist.

SFTFF Artistic Director Shawna Virago, “We can’t wait to share this milestone tenth festival with audiences. You can see how we’ve grown by this amazing lineup of f ilms made by trans-people from all over the world.” Virago adds, “This is a ver y popular festival, and this year w ill be even more so. Get your t ickets early – last yea r we broke t he t heater’s re cord s for t he l a rgest aud iences ever!”

T hu r sday, Nov. 3 opens w it h a specia l Tent h A n n iversa r y Perfor ma nce E xt ravaga n za feat ur-

The San Francisco Transgender Fi l m Fest iva l, or ig i na l ly ca l led Tr a n n y Fe s t , w a s e s t a b l i s h e d in 1997 and is t he nat ion’s f irst transgender/ gender- queer f i lm festival. SF TF F emerged for the same reason t hat so many marg ina l ized commun it ies have org a n i zed f i l m fest iv a l s: t he ab sence of authentic representations of transgender lives and exper iences in the mainstream commercial media. In the 14 years since, SF T F F h a s r em a i ne d d e f i a nt , proudly programming outside the box, exhibiting groundbreaking, provocat ive, outrageous, courageous , mov i ng, a nd i n nov at ive works t hat show t he complex it y of lives lived on the transgender/ gender- queer s pect r u m. Or ig ina l ly a bien n ia l fest iva l, it be came an annual festival in 2005.

T h e F e s t i v a l r u n s N o v. 3 - 5 a t C ou nt e rP U L SE (1310 M ission Street near 9t h Street).

Tickets are $12-15 at brownpapertickets.com. More information at sftf f.org.

VOTE NO ON C & D TAX THE RICH STOP THE ATTACKS ON EVERYDAY PEOPLE. WALL STREET SAYS TAKE BACK! WE SAY FIGHT BACK! BILLIONAIRE VERUS BILLIONAIRES THESE MEASURES ARE BACKED BY BILLIONAIRES, THE SAME ONES THAT ARE FUNDING ATTACKS ON WORKERS IN OTHER STATES. The San Francisco Chronicle made it clear in a recent editorial that Propositions C and D are just the latest round in the ongoing attack on the right of workers to affordable health care and livable pensions – and that there are more attacks to come if we don’t hold the line against Wall Street.

Those who think we should concede many of our hardfought rights to appear “reasonable” are sadly mistaken.

That is like putting a little blood in the water, and hoping that the sharks will be satisfied. When the sharks taste blood, they just get hungry for more.

Don’t let Billionaire Warren Hellman, financial supporter of YES ON C, and on the D side Billionaires Michael Moritz and George Hume control workers' destiny.

Paid for by Denise D'Anne (ddanne1@sbcglobal.net)

See more

Stories @sfbaytimes.com

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BAY T IM ES NOV EM BER 3, 2011 13

MUSIC

San Francisco’s Best Cafe k.d. lang, Melissa Ferrick Rock Breakfast Lunch Dinner Cocktails

Full Service Bar Pastries Desserts

2298 Market Street • San Francisco, CA (415) 621-8579 • www.cafeflore.com

k.d. lang wowed the crowd at The Fillmore on October 26.

the girls in Berkeley are pretty, and not to be afraid of who we are.

Music

Ornaments & Décor Holidays Cards Gift ideas for everyone … and support HIV/AIDS service organizations.

Kirsten Kruse It was a red-hot week for the women’s music scene with both Melissa Ferrick and k.d. lang rocking both sides of the Bay. Monday night saw Melissa Ferrick at the Freight & Salvage in Berkeley, who played to an enthusiastic crowd of about 200 women and 6 men, with opening band Vandaveer, a folksy singer/songwriter acoustic duo. Ferrick started her set with This Time of Year from her brand new, recently released Album Still Right Here, and continued with several new songs, like "Weightless and Slow" and "Singing With the Wind". With her signature self-deprecating humor Ferrick quipped the latter is a song about going out with someone who is 10 years younger than you – and thinking it won’t matter.

518A Castro Street San Francisco, California 415-503-2300 www.underoneroof.org

Holiday Garage Sale Nov. 25-27th 12pm-5pm 2278 Market Street

Ferrick is neurotic and apologetic, yet clings to hope, jokes about falling down and getting back up, and her audience gets it. Take "John’s Field", a song about breaking up, moving on, and at least getting a good song out of it. She followed up with "Getting Over You", an incredibly sad and raw performance, but then raised amazing energy with "Beijing". "Closer" was next, one of Ferrick’s positive songs – not all her songs are sad and intense, but to quote Ferrick, intensity has never really been a problem for her. She reaches into the depth of her audience’s souls with her sincerity, her no holds barred singing and she backs it up with outstanding guitar skill.

Puerto Vallarta anyone?

Vamos a la playa!

Enter to win a fabulous Puerto Vallarta Vacation, visit:

www.gaycities.com/promos/vallarta/ Sponsored by

14 BAY T IMES NOVEM BER 3, 2011

By K. Cole

the Bay Area

The

Holiday Store

POP ROX

Her 19 song show continued with more new music, like "You Let Me Be", one of her own favorites, and bound to be a hit with her fans, though it’s a love song, non-neurotic, grateful and celebratory. This song features Ani Di Franco on her CD. Next, "Anything Anywhere" was a huge crowd pleaser, with Ferrick seamlessly switching from singing and playing guitar to playing the trumpet, and back (a feat of coordination) without missing a beat. She wound the show down with "Still Right Here", and an extremely dysfunctional yet hilarious version of the obligatory "Drive". She closed with " Welcome to My Life", reminding the audience, that yes, all

Wednesday night k.d. lang performed a not sold out show at the legendary Fillmore, after opening act Teddy Thompson, British acoustic folk rock musician. k.d.’s audience, approximately half male and female, half gay and straight, was extremely enthusiastic and treated her like the rock star she truly is. k.d. performed with the Siss Boom Bang, her male 5-member band, while wearing black pants, shirt and jacket with a red silk tie.

The interaction between lang and her band was enjoyable to watch, with the men readily accepting her butch energy as one of their own. lang set the tone of the show right away with a sexy "I Confess", getting members of the audience to swoon when she promised to be their Daddy.

She continued with "Summer Fling and Water’s Edge", and then "Miss Chatelaine", inviting audience participation which was eagerly given by the enthused crowd. She then encouraged the audience to let its freak flag fly with "Sing It Loud" (so everyone knows who you are!). Her smile and sincerity made this song deeply moving. Then, tongue-in-cheek, she decided to give the show a serious and religious twist, with a cover of "Heaven", and followed it up with an incredibly beautiful, goose bumps inducing "Hallelujah".

She reached back to her country roots with "Western Star", a sensual Chris Isaak song, and continued with "Perfect World" and "Habit of Mind". She moved on to another cover, "Reminiscing", and "Sorrow Nevermore" before a climactic "Constant Craving", performed as a bass heavy rock version, and undeniably her most famous song from her Ingenue album.

To say that the audience went wild would be an understatement. She took this energy to "Pay Dirt", a fun country bluegrass number, accompanied by washboard, banjo and accordion, to celebrate her 22nd anniversary of playing in San Francisco.

Then she moved to an almost metal version of "Sugarbuzz", which truly def ied words of description. What never fails to impress is lang’s amazing ability to successfully pull off so many different styles of music and yet, maintain an air of sensuality and f lirtatiousness. She wound the show down with "Inglewood", with some calm and sweet country steel guitar and a sweet version of Tony Bennett’s "A Kiss to Build a Dream On".

Two great nights of music that makes me truly grateful to live in this city – thank you, Melissa and k.d. for visiting here.

Cyndi Lauper To Memphis With Love This is a DV D/CD combo of fers l ive per for mances of songs L auper released in 2010 on the album called Memphis Blues. Fans w ill enjoy seeing a g reat enter t a iner do what she does best, but for lifelong blues fa n s , t h i s one m ight grade on the senses.

Best Cut: Romance in the Dark Location: DVD player, Midnight Sun

Lynda Carter Crazy Little T hings That’s right, it’s Wonder Woman following up on her 1978 release “Portrait” and crazy thing is, it’s as if there hasn’t been any musical progress since then. It’s as glossy as Nashville’s studio mill can put out and the song select ion reads like a set list from a cover band in 1979 ( I know, I was in one!).

Best Cut: “Sentimental Journey” Location: Senior center bingo night

Lights Resolve Feel You’re Different Art glam rockers from NYC release their second attempt into the fray of LGBT-centric self-indulgence with this release. Sporting solid musicianship, lyrics and definitely a distinct sound.

Best Cut: “Rhapsodize” Location: Folsom Street Festival whipping post

Nhoj j Adam and Steve I f you h aven’t he a r d of N hoj j, you had better get on the dow nload. A tr uly genuine art ist supporting the LGBTQ communit y, the self less and sweet voice of an angel cont inues to support w ithout anger, without preaching, but through love and lovely music.

Best Cut: Adam and Steve Location: Lying in the sun, Dolores Beach

HOT TICKETS many of your favor ite Lamplighter singers. Patrons are invited to come early to browse the many fabulous items in our si lent auct ion which includes vacat ions, lessons, ar t and mu s ic , L a mpl i ghter s memo rabilia, and one-of-a-kind exper iences such a s a wa l k- on role in a Lamplighter per formance. After the show the audience are inv ited to join the costumed cast and crew in the g reen room for a champag ne party! Tickets: $55-97 Sunday November 6 at 4:00pm Herbst Theatre 401 Van Ness Ave SF. Available at lamplighters.org.

Chely Wright will perform at the UpTown Theatre on November 10.

C h e l y Wr i g h t i n N a p a T he Fir st A n nua l Napa Va lley Film Festival w ill be held Nov. 9 -13. One of t he opening night f ilms will be Wish Me Away, a personal and intimate look at Chely Wright, the f irst c ou nt r y mu s ic st a r t o c ome out as gay. Thursday, Nov. 10, 5:30 PM at Napa Va l ley Opera House, 1030 Main Street, Napa . Chely Wr ight w i l l be in attendance, along with the d irectors. Tickets: Napa Va lley Film Festival website. After the Premiere, Chely LIVE IN CONCERT at the incomparable UpTown Theatre, at 8pm.

C oncer t requ i res a sepa r ate t icket. Concer t t icket s ava i la ble at u pt ow nt he at r en a pa . com.

Carly Ozard will play the Rrazz Room November 7 - 9.

S o m e t h i n g Wo nd e r f u l ? Many k now Carly Ozard's comed ic h istor y w it h dating. Some t ur n out gay, ot hers tur n out to be even more mentally unstable than she is!

Nor ma l ly, a show about love a n d r e l a t i o n s h i p s w o u l d n' t even be a considerat ion, but at 27 yea r s old, it 's t i me for a musica l journey relat ing to the many young people struggl ing to f ind t he person t hey deser ve. Featur ing t he music of Rodgers and Hammerstein, Lucinda Williams, Creedence Clear water Rev iva l, E lton John, Bette Midler, and more!

O za r d com ic a l ly pu l l s f rom persona l ex per iences ( but leaves out the names!) and the g r ow i n g r e s u lt s f r om t hem .

This show musica l ly commun icates stor ies of t r ut h, loss, hope, a nd even sca nda l! Adm ission $25 & 2 d r in k m in imum. November 7, 8 & 9, 2011 at 8pm at The Rrazz Room at t he Hotel N i k ko 222 M a son Street at O'Farrell, SF. Tickets available at therrazzroom. com.

T he Fishta n k Ensemble B r av a T h e a t e r i s p r o u d t o pr e s ent , it s f i r st e ver Fr ont Woman Series as part of Sally’s Nights of Music, curated

by Br ava’s M a nag i ng D i rector, Het a l Patel. To k ick of f the Front Woman Series, Brava welcomes t he high energ y a nd ext raord inar y ba nd, t he F i sht a n k E n semble w it h t he talented local songstress, Kelly McFa rl i ng a s t he open i ng act. T he Fisht an k Ensemble, coming directly from Los Angeles, will engage your senses and send you to a wonderland of fantasy, cu lture and fascination. If Whirling Dervishes cou ld enter your body, Fishtank would be their medium.

Ursula Knudson, lead virtuoso and saw player, sets the stage for a n un forget t able even i ng of music master y. Tickets are $2 0 pl ay i n g Novemb er 3 at 8pm at Brava 2781 24th St. SF for tickets and info visit brava.

B r o k e B AC H M o u n t a i n org.

T he L esbia n/Gay Chor us of T h e Wo m e n' s B u i l d i n g San Francisco ( LGCSF ) con3 3 r d A n nu a l C e leb r at ion tinues to push its creative and o f C r a f t s w o m e n - Ta k e s artistic limits with a new show pl a c e Novemb er 11-13 f r om inspired by the Oscar-winning 10:0 0 a.m. to 5:0 0 p.m. each mov ie of s i m i l a r n a me a nd day at For t Mason Center in mu s ic s t r et c h i n g b a c k ov e r Sa n Fr a nc i sco. Ad m i ssion i s three hundred years, “Broke$9.00 for adults, $7.00 for se- BAC H Mou nt a i n” i s f u l l of n iors, st udents and d isabled, v a r iet y, pu n s a nd l au g ht er. and free for children ages 12 T he f i r st ha l f of t he concer t a nd u nd er. A t wo - d ay p a s s features chora l music by J. S. good on any of the three days Bach and Jacques Of fenbach, is $12.00 and can be purchased songs from the Brokeback Mounon-line beginning in October. tain sound t rack, wel l-k now n T h e C e l e b r a t i o n i s w h e e l - countr y western classics, and c h a i r a c c e s s i b l e . Fo r m o r e even a good ole fashioned line infor mat ion please telephone dance. The BrokeBACH antics 650/615 - 6838, or v isit w w w. a nd a nt hems of t he f i r st act celebrationofcraftswomen.org. build up to the highlight of the evening, a ful ly staged opera L a mpl ighter s Music T he - – “Oed ipus Tex” – by P.D.Q atre Champagne Gala and B a c h (a k a Pet er S c h ic ke le).

A u c t i o n - A s a l w a y s , t h i s Described as an “opera in one much anticipated annual treat cathartic act,” the show stars features or ig ina l ly r ics set to Dr. Ti mot hy S eel ig, A r t ist ic t he music of, most ly, Sir A r- D i r e c t or a n d C ond uc t or of t hu r Su l l iva n, per for med by the San Francisco Gay Men’s

Chor us. S eel ig created t h is role in the world premiere of “ O e d i p u s Te x ” i n 1 9 8 7.

Supporting Seelig in the title role w i l l be players from t he Sa n Fr a nc i s co L esbi a n/G ay Freedom Band, includ ing Ja d i ne L ou ie , t he Fr e e d om Band’s Artistic Director, in the hilarious role of Old Gabe, the crazy French horn player. The chorus will perform a humorous a nd en l ighten i ng m i x of modern and classica l hits for two nights only – Nov 18 and 19 at 8pm at the Mission Cultural Center 2868 Mission St SF. Tickets are $15 -$30 sl idi n g s c a le g ener a l a d m i s s ion and may be purchased online at lgcsf.org.

T he 3 r d A n nu a l C a b a r e t Showca se Showdow n: F INA L CON TEST - Kat ya Lud m i l la Sm ir nof f- Sk y y and M r s. Tr au ma F l i nt stone a re proud to announce t he Fina l Contest Of The 2011 Cabaret Showc a s e Showdow n . A f t er 10 mont hs, w it h ten ind iv idual winners, the f inal contest br i n g s a l l f i n a l i st s tog et her to crow n t he w i n ner of B est New Cabaret Per former. The evening w ill feature the Tom Shaw Tr io as bot h t he house band and as the main accompan iment for a l l contestants.

The Tom Shaw Trio joins the f inal contest for its 3rd season a s house ba nd a nd pre-show enter t a i n ment. L ed by Tom S h a w (c o - s t a r o f Yo uTu b e ca mp v i r a l sensat ion, ' Ta ste t he B i s c u it ' ) , w it h R o b e r t a Drake on drums and John Greitzer on bass. The contest will also feature the winners of the 2009 and 2010 Best New Cabaret Performers, Carly Ozard and Cara Burgoyne. $15 Sunday November 20th at 8:30pm at Café du Nord, 2170 Market St (at Sanchez) SF. Tickets at cafedunord.com.

Jessica Bejarano will conduct the Bay Area Rainbow Symphony on November 12 at Calvary Presbyterian Church.

B ay A r e a R a i n b ow Sy m phony – The Sy mphony w ill present works by Poulenc and per form Beethoven’s 7th Symphony under the baton of Assistant Conductor Jessica Bejarano on Saturday November 12 at 8pm, Calvar y Presbyterian Church, 2515 Fi l l more St at Jack son SF. Pa r t of t he Ca lvar y Concer t Connect Ser ies benef it t i ng L a rk i n St Yout h Ser vices. Tickets are $20 -$30 and available at bars-sf.org.

If you want to submit your event for consideration in Hot T ickets, send the information to calendar@ sf baytimes.com

BAY T IM ES NOV EM BER 3, 2011 15

FOOD

A Seafood Grill – Home Away From Home The atmosphere at A lamo Square Sea food Gr i l l is rela x i ng, coz y, and quiet w ith attentive ser v ice.

It is a small place, so make a reser vat ion, a s t here a re less t ha n twenty tables. This quaint restaurant is comfortable and prov ides a home away from home feeling.

Food Melissa Myers T he choices of where to g rab a bite to eat in San Francisco are end le s s . E a c h ne i ghb orho o d i s b l o c k e d w i t h r e s t a u r a nt a f t e r restaurant. But sometimes, when you’re i n t he m id st of res iden t ia l, you’l l stumble upon a cu l inary gem, A lamo Square Seafood Grill, to be exact.

A la mo S qua re S ea food Gr i l l i s ne st le d on F i l l mor e St r e et b e t ween Gr ove a nd Fu lton. I r e cent ly went t here w it h my fa mily, and this was the perfect spot for my dad who isn’t too keen on loud and crowded places. He was a happy camper.

Better yet, on Mondays their wine list is half of f and on Wednesdays you can bring up to two bottles of wine and have them corked there.

If you plan on bringing your own wine, you may want to call ahead and ask what f ish they are serving that night so that you may match up your wine choice accordingly.

We brought a bottle of Pinot Noir ( F leur Car neros) wh ich complemented our f ish beautifully.

Now onto the food!

Be sure to st ar t of f w it h a n ap petizer! I had my f irst experience with escargot here – and was surprisingly pleased. A lthough I consider myself an adventurous eater, I was never interested in t r y ing sna i ls. T he esca rgot was ser ved coated in warm garlic and pesto sauce, which could have covered a piece of paper and would have still been delicious. For starters, we also got the calamari which is

PHOTO BY STEVE UN DERHIL L

Unmasked Gala Fundraiser Held for GLBT Historical Society

Joseph Rocha and Konstantin Kosov at the GLBT Historical Society "Unmasked" Gala.

By Sister Dana Van Iquity

(EXTRA JUMP continued from page X)

O f ten refer red to a s Sa n Fr a ncisco's “queer Smithsonian,” the GL BT Historical Societ y houses one of the world's largest collect ion s of lesbi a n , g ay, bi sex u a l , and transgender historical mater ia ls. T he S ociet y 's new GL BT Histor y Museum is the f irst fullscale, stand-alone museum of its k i nd i n t he Un ited St ates. T he GLBT Historical Society's annua l “Unmasked” ga la held in t he Green Room of the San Francisco War Memorial & Performing Arts Center is a social highpoint of the year for members and fr iends of the Bay Area GLBT community.

The evening featured entertainment, passed food, and a hosted bar. A silent auction of fered queer historic photos and memorabilia, among other items. There I discovered my new favor ite w i ne, chocolate port from Ficklin vineyards. Many people wore ornate

masks w ith feathers, glitter, and beads. Some wore costumes.

Board cocha ir A my Sueyoshi pointed out t he honored g uests, includ ing Phyl lis Lyon, A rmistead Maupin, Joseph Rocha, Jose Sarria, Michele Tea, and the organizers of the Bay Area’s great queer marches: Dyke March, SF Pr ide, Sistahs Steppin' in Pr ide, and the Trans March. Since this i s t he 5 0 t h a n n iver s a r y of t he ea rl iest k now n r u n for elect ive of f ice by a n open ly g ay c a nd idate anywhere in the world, when José Sarria made history when he joined the race for the San Franc i s c o B o a r d of S u p er v i s or s i n 1961, the GLBT History Museum is now highlighting Sarria's 1961 campaign with a special one-case exhibit running through Nov. 21.

T he d i s pl ay i nc ludes m ater i a l s from Sarr ia's extensive personal papers, which he donated to the archives of the GL BT Historical

scattered over a white bean salad and joined with a sweet curry aioli dip, making the calamari even more addicting with each dip.

A nd for the main course, take a glance to the cha lkboard on the walls to see the daily specials. The night we went there was a seafood pasta, pork loin and several other enticing entrees. But don’t be too qu ick to decide – t he wa it st a f f will also of fer you four entrees of f ish to choose from. We were delighted by the options of ahi tuna, snapper, trout or salmon.

For those not into f ish, you have v a r i o u s o t h e r n o n s e a fo o d o p t ion s. I ’ve t r ied bot h t he stea k a nd ch icken before a nd each of t hem w a s g r i l led to p er fec t ion and evenly sprinkled with f lavor.

However, considering it is a seafood rest aura nt – I’l l st ick w it h the f ish, and I suggest you do as well.

Depending on the various f ish offered that day, you also have the choice between having it grilled, sautéed, poached, or blackened in either béarnaise, buerre blanc, green peppercorn, provencale, or buerre maitre d’hotel sauce.

Society. The exhibit will be open during regular museum hours.

Board Cochair A ndrew Jolivette i nt r o duc e d E xec ut ive D i r ec t or Paul Boneberg, who spoke of District 8 Supervisor Scott Wiener’s secur ing a recent $85,0 0 0 grant from T he Cit y to keep t he Museum open during these dif f icult economic times. The Museum is located in District 8 on 18th and Ca st ro St reet s. W iener sa id he will “f ight to make sure we keep the Museum there.”

Boneberg said they have doubled the staf f of their archives and are in the process of surveying every collection in the archives.

“A s you pr ob a bl y k now, t her e is a batt le around queer histor y across t he count r y,” sa id Boneberg. “It is related, in my mind, to the fact that a number of young people a r e b ei ng tor mented i n school to t he poi nt where some actually kill themselves.” He continued, “The Historical Society is one of a number of organizations that teach these people not to feel isolated.” He said a school district i n M issour i was act ua l ly blocki ng t he GL BT H S webs ite f rom its students. He noted that in the near future there could be ballot initiatives against teaching queer h i stor y i n tex tbook s. B oneber g sa id , “ T here i s a g reat dea l of work before us.” He said we must continue to create an archive that is wor t hy of our founders and a museum that is an inspiration to visit. He emphasized it should be a world class museum.

(GAY MEN'S CHORUS continued from page 12) L iv i ng ston, a nd t here wa s t a l k from table to table about the chorus’ altruistic tours through small California cities that also f inance their local LGBT groups.

16 BAY T IMES NOVEM BER 3, 2011

The Gay Men’s Chorus has managed to prosper during a time of f inancial uncertaint y, and much of t he cred it is due to not on ly the staf f and board, but also the adv isor y boa rd, wh ich i ncludes

Marriage Equality’s Molly McKay, the Bay Times’ Dr. Betty Sull i v a n , H o r i z o n s Fo u n d a t i o n’s Devesh K hat u, a nd t he Hu ma n R i g h t s C o m m i s s i o n’s C e c i l i a Chung. Dr. Timot hy Seel ig, t he new A r t ist ic Director and Conductor was welcomed by donors.

Hardworking Artistic Operations Manager M ike Holland also deser ves credit for present ing pro-

fessional light and sound in spaces where it never existed previously.

The chorus is also thriving thanks to the monumental talents of Paul Saccone, the music director of the Lollipop Guild and Carl Pant le, t he A ssociate A r t ist ic Di rector, Principal Pianis, and the musical director of the Vocal Minority. A wonderful event ended with musical interludes from both.

Sister Dana Says . . .

Bay Area Poet Kay Ryan - 2011 Pulitzer Prize and MacArthur “Genius Grant” Winner

Halloween Tricks & Treats from Sister Dana Van Iquity

Here are some treats you will enjoy: How was YOUR Hollow Weenie?

I thoroughly enjoyed the GL A A D “ Her o e s a nd V i l l a i n s” t heme d cost u me pa r t y f u nd r a i ser at 8 0 M issour i. Creator Adam Sandel was the poofy emcee from Cabaret. Hostess Donna Sachet was a naughty nurse. GL A A D Regional Director Juan Barajas was a silver glitter-gloved Michael Jackson. I was Super Gay Caballero in tiar’d pink ten gallon hat and dripping in rhinestones and rainbows. Sister spied so many characters as we danced “The Time Warp”: heroes l i ke The Green Lanter n, Superma n, Bat ma n & Robi n, Spiderma n, Ta r za n, gay m i l it a r y men who wer e a s k i n g A N D t e l l i n g, D'Artagnan of the Three Musketeers, Miss Pigg y with Kermit the Frog, Peter Pan with Tinker Bell; and villains Bonnie & Clyde, Joan Crawford and Baby Jane Hudson, C r ue l l a d eV i l le, S ue Sy l v e s t er from Glee, Malef icent the witch, Freddy Kruger, Dracula, and the Creature from the Black Lagoon.

My fellow Sisters of Perpetual Indu lgence showed t heir ow n specia l “t rad it iona l fa m i ly va lues” by throwing a Halloween costume pa r t y for t he k idd ies w it h fa ce pa int ing, enter t a i n ment, ca ndy, a nd a bi g pa r a d e t h r ou g h t he Cast ro. T hen we t hrew an “A ngels and Demons” (reference Dan Brown’s book and the movie) beer bust fundra iser at T he Edge for the SF Night Ministry ( providing midd le-of-the-night compassionate nonjudgmental pastoral care, cou n sel i ng, refer r a l , a nd c r i s i s i nt er vent ion t o a nyone i n a ny k i nd of d ist ress) w it h dev i l ish ly good enter tainment by The Ducal Court. Lastly I caught Gypsy L ove’s latest release part y at Q Bar for her sizzling, queerif ic CD a nd mu s ic v ideo, “ W i sh,” w it h K ippy M a rk s on elect r ic v iol i n

BIG DEA L is Visual A id’s wildly popular par t y on Saturday Nov. 12, where 50 0 work s of a r t a re sold at $165 apiece, and an exciting live auction features f ine art a nd lu xur y items. Come for t he great art, bargains, people-watching, chill tunes, cocktails, lav ish hors d’oeuvres, and desserts. Visua l A id prov ides f ree a r t sup plies, grants, exhibition opportunit ies, and communit y to art ists liv ing with A IDS, breast cancer, d iabetes, Hep C, and other lifethreatening illnesses. Big Deal is at SOM Arts Cultural Center, 934 Brannan & 8th Streets. Info at visualaid.org or (415) 777-8242.

V IOL ET E Y E S I N T H E R E D CI T Y is amf A R's yearly char it y event on Friday, Nov. 4 at 9 PM at the Ken Fulk Studio. amfA R is dedicated to the support of A IDS research, HI V prevention, treatment education, and the advocacy of sound A IDS -related public pol ic y. Si nce 19 85, a m f A R ha s invested nearly $325 million in its programs and has awarded grants to more t ha n 2,0 0 0 research tea ms worldw ide. More i n fo at (415) 4 02- 0303 or a m fa r.org.

This is one the most popular social events of the year, benef iting Da me E l i zabet h Taylor’s Fou ndat ion for A I DS Research, w it h specia l per for ma nces by Cha k a K han, Bravo T V’s A ndy Cohen, a nd actor A la n Cu m m i ng s. It’s a lav ish Moroccan-themed party for 5 0 0 g uest s , feat u r i ng coc ktails, hors d’oeuvres, and sweets

by Top Chef Just Desserts winner Yigit Pura.

SOMETHING WONDERFUL is the title of Carly Ozard’s newest cabaret show at the Rrazz Room in Hotel Nikko, 222 Mason Street at O’Farrell on Nov. 7, 8, and 9 at 8 PM. Carly’s comed ic song s feature the music of Rodgers and

(LIKE CRAZY continued from page 13) two things. Should I have cof fee or tea? Cof fee or Tea? Cof fee or Tea? They’re bot h good. W hich one should I have? [ Laughs].

W hat do you think account s for h e r strong bond to Jacob?

As A nna, I believe that their relationship was eternal, and would have happened whatever the situation and they were meant to be toget her. She devout ly bel ieves that. She’s religious about him. I was pleased for her to be in extremis. I don’t think it would be interesting to see someone who was mildly interested in him.

T he f ilm is quite cynical about marriage…

Ye s , t h e f i l m i s v e r y c y n i c a l about marriage. The [characters] get ma r r ied for leg a l rea sons. I don’t think that people feel that t hey shou ld be mar r ied, or t hat marr iage is rea l ly impor tant [to them], but they make that into a romantic moment. I love the idea of just the two of them, dancing in a room [on their wedding night].

I think that’s deeply romant ic. I think that shows how small their world i s — it ’s t he t wo of t hem.

They don’t have loads of friends.

Hammerstein, Lucinda Williams, Creedence Clea r water Rev iva l, E lt on Joh n , B et t e M id ler, a nd more. “ T h is is not a t r ite show about love and how grand it is, or how badly we want it,” says Carly.

“It’s an observation from experience: most of us are so crazy, it’s hard to f igure out who and what we deserve. But in this life, we all deser ve to experience something – something wonderful!” $25 tix and info at therrazzroom.com.

I T’S A L L T HE R AGE is comic Marilyn Pitman’s latest one-woman show, “the funniest show about mu rder- su ic ide you’l l ever see” at Stage Werx, 446 Valencia and 15th Streets on Monday, Nov. 14 a nd Tuesday, Nov. 15 at 8 P M. “ I g rew up i n a f u n ny fa m i ly,” M a r i ly n revea l s , “a nd t hen my dad shot my mom. And then himself. He was a W WII vet, she was a poet. The ‘greatest generation?’

Nah. Love is deadly. It could happen to you. I survived it. Mostly.

And I’m a comic.” Tix at brownpapertickets.com or visit goldstar. com. For i n fo: ma r i ly npit t ma n. com and check out her youtube. com/pittmonstergal.

GAY IN A MERICA is a fascinating photo book by photog rapher S c ot t P a s f i e ld , for w h ic h T he M ag net C enter of queer hea lt h a nd wel lbei ng at 4122 18t h a nd Ca st ro St reet s i s doi ng a f u ndr a i s i ng book s ig n i ng on Sat u rday, Nov. 5, 7 PM. It's an amazing project: 224 pages, 14 0 men in 50 st ates, photog raphed over t h r e e ye a r s t r ave l i n g 52 , 0 0 0 + miles. Lots of SF area men, too.

Pasf ield will present a slideshow, discussion, and signing. Meet the fat hers, sons, brot hers, couples, fami lies, and t he nice g uys next door, as Scott takes us on a journey across Gaymerica. Purchases of Gay in America will help raise money for two great SF nonprof it A I D S f i g ht i n g or g a n i z at ion s T he M ag net Center a nd Under One Roof. This is followed by a book s ig n i ng, d r i n k s , a nd hor s d’o euv r e s at Under O ne Ro of , 518A Castro Street.

Buh-bye! Gotta go out tricking now!

P H OTO BY C H RISTI N A KO C I H E R N AN DE Z

(g y psytime.com). Oh, not counti n g t he m a ny m id n i ght pr ow l s t h r ough my C a st ro du r i n g ou r gay nat iona l four-day high holid ay, H a l lowqueen Weekend , of course.

Kay Ryan, who lives in Fairfax, won the Pulitzer Prize for Poetry in 2011.

i s “excel lence i n poet r y.” D u ring her un ique t wo -year tenure, 2008 -2010, she launched “Poetr y for the Mind’s Joy,” a project that focuses on the poetr y wr itten by community college students.

Inspired Prof iles Kathleen Archambeau K ay Rya n wa s c yc l i ng t h rough Colorado on a 4,0 0 0 m i le bic ycle trip when she made the decision to become a ser ious w r iter because she loved w r it i ng more t h a n a ny t h i ng. C om i ng f rom a fa m i ly of oi l d igger s a nd secretar ies in the Mojave Desert who t hought poet r y was “put t i ng on airs” made the decision to become a poet a l l t he more courageous.

Den ied ad m ission to t he Poet r y Club at UCL A for being too much of an “outsider,” Ryan went on to win nearly every respected poetry prize.

Kay Ryan is known for her twisted u se of c l iché, m a l apropi sm s a nd i nter na l rhy me schemes.

“Rhyme makes connections all on its own…things are bound together by sound.” Ryan characterizes her rhymes as, “recombinant like genetics…I snip sound and reassemble it.” I n a 20 0 8 i nter v iew with Charlie Rose, the Librarian of Cong ress, Dr. Ja mes Bi l l i ngton defended his choice of Ryan to w in t he honor of Poet Laureate of t he Un ited St ates, say i ng t he on ly cr iter ia for t h i s honor

Perh a p s K ay Ry a n c a r v e d out such a s i ng u l a r voice by l iv i ng her qu iet l i fe i n Fa i r fa x for 33 years, 30 of them w ith her partner and fellow College of Mar in E n g l i s h t e a c he r, C a r o l A d a i r.

Maybe Ryan developed her ow n accessible, short, witty style by eschew ing w r iter’s work shops and critiques. Her primar y critic and ed itor wa s her spouse, t he f i r st a nd on ly reader of Rya n’s work before publication.

How does Ryan work? A creature of habit and a lover of the simple life, she gets up and eats breakfast and then goes back to bed in her paja mas unt i l noon a nd t r ies to read something provocative, usua l ly l iterar y essays, before w r iting. Then, Ryan writes. Ty pically, she w r ites most ever y day at the same time, asserting that she “mistrusts inspiration.”

Unlike the orphan in Dickens’ Oliver Twist extending his bowl and a sk i ng for “ More,” Rya n wou ld l i ke to extend her bowl a nd ask for “ L ess,” a t heme ex plored i n her poem, Blandeur, found in her latest collection, T he Best of It: “If it please God, /let less happen./… r em a nd you r/ter r ible gl a c ier s/ and si lence/t heir ca lv ing,/ha lving or doubling/all geographical feat ures/towa rd t he mea n./ Unlea n a g a i n st ou r hea r t s ./ W it hd raw your g ra ndeur/from t hese parts.” (continued on page 21)

Do you think it’s simply distance that drives Anna and Jacob apart?

I think they grow up, and they do change as people. But t hat goes back to t he t i me t hat t hey met.

They want to keep that alive all the time, and you can’t actually.

You have to realize that both of them have changed and that the relat ionsh ip const a nt ly evolves.

They don’t let that happen. They try to get back to that place where t hey f irst met. It’s how t heir relationship is. The time they meet is much less t ha n t he t i me t hat t hey spent toget her, but it act ua l ly becomes more i mpor t a nt than that [initial romance]. The f ilm mirrors the way they see the relations. The reason they are so obsessed w ith the t ime they met is because t hey meet and fa l l in love - or what they think is love at f irst sight - and it overwhelms t hem bot h i m med iately. I t h i n k they feel that won’t ever happen again. So what can you do?

More News, Stories, and Arts & Entertainment online

@sfbaytimes.com

BAY T IM ES NOV EM BER 3, 2011 17

COMMUNITY

CALENDAR

compiled by Christine Dumke Fran c i s c o’s favor ite s p ot for queer and queer friendly comedy now at the fabulous Martunis beginning at 8pm 4 Valencia St at Market, SF $5-15 Sliding Scale, NOTAFLOF .

8 Tuesday

SmartyPants Tuesday Trivia with Miss Kitty Tapata - Free to p lay! Free fres h p o p c or n!

Pr i ze s! D r i n k s p e c i a l s! A n d trust us that with Kit t y at the helm, this is not your “average” pub quiz - we turn trivia into a contact sport! 8:30p-10:30p at Stray Bar 3 0 9 Cor tland Ave, SF.

9 Wednesday

PHOTO BY TILL KRUEGER

Bay Area Iv y Alumni and Fri e n d s M ixe r - N ovem ever Meeting at6:30pm - 8:30pm at Make Westing in uptown Oaklan d (1741 Tel e gra p h Ave at corner of 18th St). BART: Oakland 19th St. “Ivy and Friends” means that ever yone is wel come. Over 75 women turned out for our September 21 mixer in San Francisco. We hope you will be able to join us in No vember!

Dianne Amos, aka “The Pine Sol Lady” headlines Comedy Returns to El Rio on Monday, November 14 at El Rio on Mission Street.

3 Thursday

Go Deep - The moment you’ve all been waiting for, Red Hots B u r l e s q u e S F ’s B e s t B u m p and Grind have been conspiring with your friends at El Rio to bring you a All Girl Monthly Lube Wrestling Par ty. No one can resist hot babes covered in glistenin g s ex s li c k writh ing and wriggling in at tempts of pinning each other. You can come and watch or be a part of the action. Make a reservation and get ring side seats! Email redhotsburlesque@gmail.com.

Red Hots Burlesque & El Rio Present Go Deep: Let’s Wrestle Ever y First (or fist) Thursday of the Month Sign ups & Burlesque 8pm Wrestling Begins at 9pm. El Rio 3158 Mission St SF. Gay and Converting to Judaism - Join a panel of LGBT folks who have converted to Judaism to learn about their proc ess, their questions & worries. Also, how is it working out being a g ay J ew ? T h ey w i l l d i s c u s s congregational life and Jewish communal life in the bay area.

Bring your own questions, we’ll bring the noshes.7:30-10:30pm Temple Sinai 2808 Summit St Oakland, 510-451-3263 or oaklandsinai.org.

dance music all night long.

10:30 - 3am, free before 11pm and $5 after at 201 9th St, SF. Info: asiasf.com.

Magnet: 4122 18th Street. 4155 81-16 0 0. U n d e r O n e R o o f: 518A Castro Street. 415 -503 2300 SF.

WTF? - WTF is open to all women & transfolks, Genderqueer folk, femmes, and other people who’ ve had gender bias, ho mophobia, or transphobia keep them away from the wrenches!

T h e B i ke K i tc h en i s a d o - i tyourself bicycle resource run by volunteers where you can get help to fix your bike, use tools, find used parts, or build up a bike from scratch! 6-9pm at the Bike Kitchen’s new home at 650H Florida St, SF. Now on the 1st and 3rd Fridays of the month. www.bikekitchen.org.

San Jose Inferno! - An awesome women’s party!! If the 20 something club scene isn’t your scene anymore and you pre fer to party with your peers….. t h e n I nfer n o Da n c es a re fo r You! Our fabulous DJ’s fill the evening with an exc iting mix of the best Ol d Skool, Funk, R&B through today’s top beats; featuring DJ WildFire; 6-10p at Splash 65 Post St in downtown San Jose; $10 info at hotflashdances.com.

5 Saturday

Gay In Ame rica Book Sign ing - Under One Roof and Magnet invite you to join us for an evening with Scott Pasfield as he presents and signs his new b ook of photography, Gay In America. Scott will be at Magnet at 7 PM to do a presentation. At 8 PM, he will be around the corner at Under One Roof signing copies of his book.

Fa mily Build e r s - Is a n on profit, licensed foster care and adoption agency, ser ving children and youth in the foster care system. Family Builders by Adoption is predicated on the belief that ever y child has the right to grow up in a p er man ent , nur tur in g famil y.

Orientation session 1st Saturday of the month 10am-noon at 401 Grand Ave., 4th floor, Oakland. Info: 510-272-0204 or familybuilders.org. Please call to RSVP your attendance and complete a brief inquiry before attending.

4 Friday

Viole t Eye s in the Re d Cit y an amfAR Affair - This is one the most popular social events of the year. Some of San Francisco’s most famous socialites always at ten d suc h Vanes s a G e t t y, J o y B i a n c h i , D e n i s e Hale, Sloan Barnett and Supermodel Maggie Rizer Mehran.

The amfAR Affair Party starts at 9pm with a special per formance by Chaka Khan and Bravo’s TV Andy Cohen and actor Alan Cummings will be there. It is going to be a lavish themed par t y with open bar, food by Ta s te Cate r i n g, d e s s e r t s by Top Chef Just Desserts Winner Yigit Pura, and DJ’s and dancing. For more information for tickets or tables visit amfar.kintera.org/violeteyes.

T-Dance for the Ladies! - Join them to celebrate the Castro’s longest running T-dance for the Ladies!! The producers of Delicious have launched another Saturday ladies T-Dance. Club Mami hits The Café’s roster every 1ST Saturday of the month giving the ladies who love ladies an all Latin T-Dance. Lady DJ’S Val G & Chili D rock the house!! 7 super hot lady go go’s work the boxes with free shot giveaways. $5 before 5pm, $8 after. The Cafe, 2369 Market St. Info: Christopher Berini, 415 - 359 - 6 0 61 or Christopher @djchristopherb.com.

6 Sunday

The Kentuck y Frie d Muppet Show! – There are few things more memorable than the Muppets. Come for an evening of incredible queer performances as we c elebrate our beloved Muppets, including Bert, Miss Piggy, Cookie M onster, Beaker & Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, Statler & Waldorf and of course Kermit the Frog plus many more Muppet characters, songs and memories! Special Guest Star, all the way from Seat tle. Pidgeon von Tramp! With FemC: Starr 69! $10 at Bench and Bar, 510 17th St, Oakland Doors at 7pm; performances at 7:30pm.

Stay after the show to dance to the old school tunes of Dandy Dixon!

7 Monday PHOTO BY KENT TAYLOR

Silk @ AsiaSF - A 1st Friday m o nt h l y da n c e eve nt at o n e of SOMA’s swankier spots. DJ S h aw n P s p i n s h i p h o p a n d

Cowgirl Round -Up - A lesbian country western event. The fun starts at 7:30pm beginning countr y western two-step lesson, 8:15pm line dance lesson, 8:45-11:30pm country western dance par t y! Ever y 1st Saturday of the month at the Metronome Ballroom, 1830 17th St, SF. Info: 252-9000 x151.

The Tempermentals, a play about the founding of the first gay rights organization plays November 5 - December 18 at the New Conservatory Theatre.

1 8 BAY TIMES NOVEM B E R 3 , 2 0 1 1

Qcomedy Showcase - Our M on day N ovem b er 7t h s h ow features the hilarious SF comic legend Marilyn Pit tman, with Bay Area c omedy favorites Dolores Trevino, Tessie Chua, Shelly Steward and your host Nick Leonard. And be sure to stay for the legendar y Mar tuni’s piano bar with Joe Wicht at no additional charge. San

10 Thursday

Wine Time! - Learn about g r eat w i n e s w i t h a wo m e n’s touch at Wine Time, Women in Wine Series; Featured Wine maker: Leslie Sisneros of Arista Winer y an d Is piri Winer y.

Leslie Sisneros, harnesses the intense flavors of cool climate clones and berries that produce Pinot Noir, Sisneros works to craft the most elegant wines at Arista Winery, a family winer y, and Ispiri Winer y, where she is par tner, both in Sonoma. 6- 8pm at the Terrace Room at the Lake Merritt Hotel, 1800 Madison Street, Oakland. Cost to At tend: $15 advance / $25 door. Please RSVP to “ Wine Time!” online: http:// bettyslist.com. 415.503.1375 or BettyEventInfo@aol.com.

11 Friday

I Love the 80’s with Egyptian Love r – For this one special night 1015 Folsom will be harking back to its roots to recreate the energy of its origins. We will have awesome eighties visuals for your aural delights, a fashion show, live painting, and a throwback slide show. Some call it Electro, some call it Hip Hop, some call it Old School, some call it Rap, but he calls it “ Danc e Music ”. $11 before 11pm at 1015 Folsom SF. The Hella Gay Comedy Show - Hometown comedian Charlie Ballard, who’s been seen on LO GO, C o m e d y C ent ra l a n d NBC’s Americ a’s Got Talent, brings his no-holds-barred, ava nt- ga r d e va r i et y s h ow to Oakland. Gay, straight, bi, lesbian and transgendered comics and performers will gather to entertain with a wide variety of talents, including stand-up, i m p r ov a n d s ke t c h c o m e d y; monologues; music and much m ore. T his m ont h’s feature d act is the Brush Arbor Gurlz, a local Bay Area Native American Drag Troupe lead by Landa Lakes. Landa Lakes is a former Miss New Talent Search Trannyshack winner and is also a former Grand Duchess title holder. $10 9p at La Estrellita Café 446 E. 12th St Oakland.

H e av y Rotation - Check out a queer flavored c lub for fat women and trans folk, chub sters, size rebels, BBWs, body activists and their friends and lovers. Put some wiggle back in your jiggle every 2nd Friday of the month to benefit size positive and outsider organizations and activists. $5, 10pm at El Rio, 3158 Mission St @ Precita, SF. Info: elriosf.com.

12 Saturday

LGBT Shamanism Classes - Ask questions about any subject and get connected to the Spirits that are here to help YOU! Check the website at sfcenter.org/calendar; or email Liz Dale at lizsanpablo@ aol.com. Bring a mat/pad, extra sweater/jacket, a drum and/or rattle, item for the medicine wheel.

Cost is a reasonable $25 per session. Classes will be the 2nd Saturday of each month from 10AM to 12noon in Rm 308 at The Center. 1800 Market St SF. Lavender Seniors Potluck Come out, hoot it up, and share your food at the monthly event for LGBT seniors over the age of 55.

This event generally happens on the 2nd Saturday of the month, 12pm at the San Leandro Community Church, 1395 Bancroft Ave, San Leandro.

Sissy Strut!!! - The Handsome Young Men present a Queer dance party with DJs Lil MC, Katie Duck, Ponyboy and Durt plus guests spinning Motown, oldies, doo wop, R&B, and soul jams you love to dance to! Second Fridays @ UndergroundSF 424 Haight St., between Filmore and Webster 10pm-2am $3-$5 21+.

13 Sunday

A Funny Night for Comedy - Join Host Natasha Muse and her sidekick Ryan Cronin as they welcome a variety of stand-up comedians to the stage and then ask them a variety of strange questions. With special appearances by Mike Spiegelman and Brian Fields with Headliner Chris Garica, featuring Casey Ley, Colleen Watson and Femikaze; the show will be followed by an improv jam starting at 9pm. $10 Comedy starts at 7pm.

Purchase Tickets at: brownpapertickets.com .

lesbian bar through five decades of love and laughter, heartbreak and triumph, politics and softball. The first full, staged reading of The Ball and Chain, a Musical takes place at EXIT Theatre on Friday and Saturday, Nov. 18 and 19, at 8pm. and Sunday, Nov. 20, at 2pm. Exit Stage Left 156 Eddy St SF. Tickets are $25 and available at brownpapertickets.com.

Sticky Time – A new co-production between Crowded Fire Theater and Vangaurdian Productions explores how one woman’s desperate need to live anywhere but now threatens to shatter her family’s past, future and our entire world’s reality. Part sci-fi and part philosophical journey, this play immerses the audience in a journey with the characters through multiple dimensions of time as it spirals and bends. Presented at Brava Theater Center, 2781 24th St SF show runsWednesdaysthroughSaturdays: November 2-18 at 8pm. For tickets visit: crowdedfire.org.

SexRev: The José Sarria Experience - SexRev the thrilling musical celebration of America’s first queer activist is back! José Sarria started as a drag performer at SF’s famous Black Cat Café in the early-1950s and rose to fame and popularity as the city’s first openly gay public figure. He ran for supervisor in 1961 and went on to form the Imperial Court System as Her Royal Majesty, Empress of San Francisco, José I,The Widow Norton.

SexRevutilizesanon-linearapproach to the presentation of Sarria’s life, drawing on camp, sketch comedy, opera parody and queer confrontation to tell the story of Sarria’s enormous impact on gay entertainment andLGBTpolitics. PerformancesNov.

10 – Nov. 27 at CounterPULSE 1310 Mission St. (at 9th St Civic Center BART) please see TheRhino.org for tickets and details.

The Temperamentals “Temperamental” was the code word for a gay man in the early 1950’s - part of a created language of secret words that gay men used to communicate.

The Temperamentals is the story of two men - the communist Harry Hay and the Viennese refugee Rudy Gernreich - as they fall in love and build the first gay rights organization in the pre-Stonewall United States. Runs November 4th – December 18th at The New ConservatoryTheatre Center 25 Van Ness at Market SF; visit nctcsf.org for Tickets and Information.

Parents & Kids

Mamas & Papas - San Francisco Families: Expand your circle of LGBTQ parents, swap parenting tips, and explore concerns shared by all parents as well as those of special interest to our families. RSVP to Julia at julia@ourfamily.org or 415-9811960, and please indicate if you need free childcare. At The LGBT Center, 1800 Market at Octavia, SF. Families with Child(ren) ages 0-5 meets 2nd & 4th Saturdays.

Childcare and kids activities begin at 9:30a, adult discussion begins at 10a. Families with Child(ren) ages 5-12 meets 3rd week of the month.

Formal parent discussion and COLAGE programming for children ages 8-12: 3:45-5:15, dinner 5:155:45. Info: www.ourfamily.org/ events/calendar for dates.

COLAGE - Children of Lesbians & Gays Everywhere, Community and Activism by and for kids, youth, and adults with LGBTQ parents. 1550 Bryant Street, Suite 830, SF. Info: 861-KIDS. Info: colage.org Transracial Adoption Support Group - Relevant and living resources tailored to LGBTQ parents at a highly-participatory monthly discussion group providing candid perspectives and opinions. At the SF LGBT Center, 1800 Market St., SF. Info: ourfamily.org Adoption SF/Family Builders By Adoption - Informational gatherings every 2nd Wednesday of every other month about adopting a waiting child from the SF Foster Care system. Free pre/post adoption support. 6:30p at the LGBT Center, 1800 Market St., SF. Info: 970-9601 Transgender Parent Support Group - An opportunity to connect with your peers and get mutual support. This group meets every third Saturday of the month and is comprised of a time for socializing and a group discussion. Drop-ins welcome but ongoing attendance is important to establish group rapport. 10a-12p at the LGBT Center, 1800 Market St., SF. Info: RSVP for childcare: 415-865-5553 TeenZone Gay Straight Alliance in Oakland - This group of folks age 13-17 is a space for LGBTQQ youth and their straight allies to hang out,

watch films, talk about books and plan fun activities. Every second Wednesday of the month, 5p-6p at the Oakland Main Library, Rm 219, 125 14th St., Oakland. Info: oaklandlibrary.org Adopt or Foster a California Kid AASK invites you to an informational session addressing topics related to the foster care system and adoption processes and legalities. Every first Tuesday of the month except for July 11, 7p-9p at 7700 Edgewater Dr, Ste 320 Bldg B, Oakland. Info/ reg: Andrea at 510 553-1748 x12.

Support Group for Pregnant Lesbians - An on-going group for pregnant queers, lesbians, dykes, bisexuals, genderqueer people and their partners led by Laura Goldberger, MFT. This group costs $45 per session (sliding scale may be available), and is held every Thursday night, 6:45p-8:15p in Berkeley. Info: 510-524-5565 or lauragoldberger@sbcglobal.net.

Parents Are Social Too! - A group of fun lovin’ moms and dads!

Comprised of lgbt families who want to create a fun venue for like-minded folk in the lgbt community. Family excursions hosted throughout the Bay Area. Membership required in the Meet-Up group: http://www. meetup.com/Bettys-List-ParentsAre-Social-Too/

See more Stories @sfbaytimes.com

LGBT Retirement Community

14 Monday

Sarah Schulman: Author and Queer Activist - Schulman is the author of 14 books, including the novels Rat Bohemia, Empathy, and The Child. She recently wrote Ties that Bind: Familial Homophobia and Its Consequences. She is co-director of the ACT UP Oral History Project and is currently organizing the first US LGBT delegation to Palestine for Winter 2012. 7:30-8:30pm at Pegasus Books 2349 Shattuck Ave Berkeley.

The community you’ve imagined...at last.

Now 50% Reserved

Comedy Returns to El Rio! - This month Dianne Amos aka ‘The Pine Sol Lady’ headlines! Also performing will be Paco Romane, Loren Kraut, Mike Spielgelman and Lisa Geduldig @ 8p El Rio 3158 Mission St. SF.Tix $7-$20 800-838-3006 or brownpapertickets.com.

15 Tuesday

SF Ladies Night Foreplay at Lime - Its ladies night Tuesday’s 50% off Food. 6:00-10:00pm for ladies. Ladies get 50% off food, $4 champagne and well drinks. Djs. Come start your night off with us, every Tuesday 6pm-10pm. $4 well drinks/champagne. Also see our Fabulous Happy hour. lime-sf.com.

2247 Market St SF 415.621.5256.

16 Wednesday

PWG Dinner Out - We will be in the “Wine Room” for our dinner out this month. The wine room will fit approx. 20 and the reservation is under ‘Sue”. Please RSVP with PWG-Dinner-Hobees in the message to Sue at pwg.suester@ yahoo.com. Hobee’s at 4224 El Camino Real, Palo Alto their menu is online: hobees.com/paloalto. html.

Give Thanks! - Spectrum’s Annual Thanksgiving Luncheon for LGBT older adults and friends.Beginning at 12 Noon at Osher Marin JCC, 200 North San Pedro Rd., San Rafael. A special welcome to those who are 80 years of age and older!

Were you born in or before 1931?

Bring a baby picture (or before the age of 25) and win a prize! Thanks to these co-sponsors, this event is FREE (though donations are welcome).

Reserve your new home on our gorgeous ten acre campus with golf course, oak grove and mountain views in the heart of Sonoma County. From gourmet dining and concierge services to spa treatments and housekeeping, our attentive staff will cater to your every need.

Gourmet Dining Cocktail Lounge

On Stage

The Ball and Chain, a Musical Welcome to The Ball and Chain, where everybody knows you’re gay. The Ball and Chain, a Musical follows the owners and the regulars of your friendly neighborhood

Wine Cave and Cellar Private Movie Theater

Entrance Fees ranging from: $295,500 - $925,500 Monthly Fees starting at $2,545

Fitness Center Swimming Pool

Resident Gardens Onsite Care Center

4210 Thomas Lake Harris Dr. Santa Rosa, CA 95403 707-576-1101 fountaingrovelodge.com

RCFE Pending

BAY T IM ES NOVEM BER 3, 2011 19

ONGOING EVENTS Thursdays

The East Bay Butch Group - Meets the 1st Thursday of every month in Berkeley, 7-9pm, to discuss and explore butch identity, to honor and preserve butch culture, and to share our common experiences. There’s a topic for each meeting that acts as a starting point or catalyst for our conversation. Meet at the Berkeley Fellowship of Unitarian Universalists (1924 Cedar Street (at Bonita), Berkeley, CA) at 7 pm. The entrance to meeting space is on Bonita - come in through the gate and go to the second floor. Unfortunately, there is no elevator. Positive Force Adventure GroupGet moving with this new monthly daytime workshop focused on a specific activity. Meets 3rd Thursday outside of the STOP AIDS offices for museums, hiking trips - places you want to go. Discussion group and lunch will follow. Please RSVP to STOP AIDS Project before the event: 415-575-0150.

Third Thursday Open Mic - All women are invited to this open mic on the 3rd Thursday of every month.

Hosted by Retts Scauzillo. Drop in for some laughs and bring your songs, poems, prose, instruments, voice or any other talent you might have. Each performer has 5 minutes to do their thing, sometimes more in the second half if time allows. It is an evening rich with entertainment. Sign up at 7pm.

Show is 7:30-9:30pm. $5 at Montclair Women’s Cultural Arts Club, 1650 Mountain Blvd. Info: 510-339-1832.

Café Poz Lunch - Ready for a new Positive Force Adventure Group-Get moving with this new monthly daytime workshop focused on a specific activity. Meets 3rd Thursday outside of the STOP AIDS offices for museums, hiking trips - places you want to go.

Discussion group and lunch will follow.

Please RSVP to STOP AIDS Project before the event: 415-575-0150.

Routine? Make a date with other HIV positive men at Café Positive, a social support event open to everyone. Gab with the guys and have a feast compliments of Café Poz and STOPAIDS Project, usually on Thursdays.

12-1:30p at the Castro Country Club, 4058 18th St., SF. Info: stopaids.org.

Transgender / Gender-Variant Social and Discussion Group Every Thursday from 5p-6:30p at Spectrum LGBT Center. A safe and friendly space to meet new people, share ideas, and have fun! 1000 Sir Francis Drake Blvd. #10, San Anselmo, CA 94960. No cost; call 457-1115 x 203 for more details www.spectrumLGBTcenter.org.

Clair’s Drop-in - Free, one-on-one counseling to help transgender community members on their personal evolution, including an overview of TEEI services. It is recommended that you call ahead to verify your walk-in time beforehand. Contact Clair Farley at clairf@sfcenter.org or call 415-8655632. Visit the Transgender Economic Empowerment Initiative (TEEI) website teeisf.org - Matching dynamic people with sustainable jobs in safe workplaces - for more info. 1p-4p at the SF LGBT Center, 1800 Market at Octavia St., SF. Out In The Bay and This Way Out Weekly program of LGBTQ issues, includes a weekly AIDS update. Every Thursday, 7:30p on KALW, 91.7.

Followed by This Way Out, the international lesbian and gay newsmagazine.

Info: www.kalw.org.

Blur - Transgender & Gender-Variant Support Group Every Thursday 6:30p-7:30p Free food! Come and chat with other trans & gv people, facilitated by trans counselors. For 18-25 y.o. youth. At Dimensions Clinic, 3850 17th St. SF. www.dimensionsclinic.org.

SNAP Talk! - A free group every Thursday where young gay and bi men who are new to San Francisco can talk about sex, jobs, boyfriends, roommates, STDs, and anything else about getting settled in S.F. SNAP Talk! is a drop-in group specifically for gay and bi men in their 20s and 30s who are new to San Francisco. Come to get support, some to talk, come to just meet people. The group is facilitated

by David Gonzalez of SNAP!, and Ryan Horvath, a counselor from the REACH Program of the UCSF AIDS Health Project. Show up at The LGBT Center (1800 Market at Octavia, SF) and look for the sign for the SNAP Talk! group, or, call 415-865-5614 to learn more.

L.O.C. (lesbians of color) - A peersupport group for women 21 years of age and older. L.O.C meets every

Thursday at Pacific Center 7p-8:30p.

Join them to carry on the tradition of providing a positive space for women of color to engage in pertinent lively discussions, exchange support and information, and to have fun and celebrate each other! Info: contact Randy Page, L.O.C. primary facilitator, at rap1on1@sbcglobal.net, or leave a message for her at (510) 595-8294.

Out of respect for people with environmental illnesses, please do not wear fragrance or scented products of any kind at L.O.C. See you there!

Men’s Coming Out Support Group Every Thursday 7p - 8:30p, for men who are questioning or coming to terms with their sexuality. This is a welcoming and supportive atmosphere to talk about what can be an uncomfortable subject matter. This is also a multi-cultural support group, where all ethnicities are welcomed.

Drop in group, no intake necessary.

Suggested donation $10, no one turned away. At New Leaf Services For Our Community, 103 Hayes Street (near Market St.), SF. Info: 415-6267000, ext. 452.

One Struggle, One Fight General Meeting - One Struggle, One Fight is an anti-oppression direct action group with two missions: Organize peaceful escalation of the LGBTQ movement by participating in and supporting direct action and civil disobedience. And to raise awareness of where our struggles intersect within the LGBTQ community and other oppressed groups. http://onestruggleonefight.com. Every week at the Unitarian Church at 1187 Franklin at Geary, SF. 7-9 pm.

Sundance Saloon Thursdays - The fun is on THURSDAYS! Line-dancing and two-steppin twice a week, every Sunday and Thursday for the queer communities! Every Thursday 6:3010:30 pm $5 at 550 Barneveld Ave, SF.

Fridays

Silk @ AsiaSF - A 1st Friday monthly dance event at one of SOMA’s swankier spots. DJ Shawn P spins hip hop and dance music all night long. 10:30-3am, free before 11pm and $5 after at 201 9th St, SF. Info: asiasf.com.

The Audre and Langston Salon - Our Night, Our Place - On the 1st Friday of every month, Black LGBT people and their friends are invited to an evening of performance, visual arts, films, and lectures to promote health, community and cultural pride. Free, 7pm at the Health and Wellness Network of the Black Coalition on AIDS, 2800 3rd St, SF. Info: bcoa.org, 615-9945.

Last Word Poetry Series - On the 2nd Friday of the month at Nefeli Café, join hosts Dale Jensen, Tim Donnelly and Diana Q at 1854 Euclid @ Hearst, Berkeley. 7-9pm. Info: 510-841-6374.

WTF? - WTF is open to all women & transfolks, Genderqueer folk, femmes, and other people who have had gender bias, homophobia, or transphobia keep them away from the wrenches! The Bike Kitchen is a do-it-yourself bicycle resource run by volunteers where you can get help to fix your bike, use tools, find used parts, or build up a bike from scratch! 6-9pm at the Bike Kitchen’s new home at 650H Florida St, SF. Now on the 1st and 3rd Fridays of the month. www.bikekitchen.org.

The Exiles - Workshops and events for women interested in S&M between women. Meets the 3rd Friday of every month at the Women’s Building Auditorium, 3543 18th St., SF. Donation requested. 8-10pm. Latecomers are only admitted at the break, around 9pm. Info: 835-4739.

LGBTQ Self Protection classes for the LGBTQ community - Gain survival skills, security, confidence and peace of mind in a supportive learning environment for people of all sexual orientations, genders, ethnicities, and nationalities. Ju Trap Boxing is an effective blend of Small Circle Jujitsu, boxing, Contemporary Jeet Kune Do, and Filipino martial arts. Rapid Assault Tactics is a no nonsense approach to street survival. Every 4th Friday from 6:30pm - 7:30pm UMAA Defensive Tactics Training Academy 4348 Third St., SF, (415) 671-2055, umaacademy. info/content/lgbt-self-protection.

Trans Yoga & Meditation at TRANS THRIVE Every Friday alternate between Yoga and Meditation. Wear comfortable clothes, THRIVE provides mats and cushions. All trans-identified and gender nonconforming folks of all abilities and experience are welcome.

Wheelchair accessible. 10:30am 12pm, 815 Hyde St., 2nd floor, btw Sutter/ Bush. Info: www.transthrive.org,

or 415-409-4101.

Transgender Support Group - For anyone who is transgendered, transsexual, or has gender issues. Beginners welcome. Fridays from 8-9:30pm Pacific Center, Berkeley. Info: 510-5488283.

Shake: America’s LGBTQ Talk Show - a live weekly call in show about the LGBTQ community. 9-11pm on Green 960 AM (The Quake) This used to be known as Queer Channel Radio. Info and podcasts at www.queerchannelradio.com.

Free Your Mind - Queer Youth Arts and Crafts Fridays from 4pm - 7pm The Center’s Youth Program fosters a weekly arts and crafts night for LGBTQ youth ages 24 and under. Come and get involved in planning our “Free Your Mind” art exhibit that aims to deconstruct stigmas around homeless and transient LGBTQ youth. Oil painting, wood burning, origami, stenciling and spray painting, jewelry making, stitch ‘n’ bitch, screen printing and fashion fun! Free pizza and snacks provided.

Earn $150 stipend for your time (space is limited). If you are interested please feel free to drop in and should you have any questions, contact Beck at 415.865.5560 or beck@sfcenter.org.

The Center, 1800 Market at Octavia, SF.

Saturdays

Writing Group for Senior Women - All women are invited to join an ongoing writers group presented by New Leaf Outreach to Elders for self-expression, creativity, supportive feedback and great company. Drop-ins welcome. The group meets every 2nd and 4th Saturday, 11am-1pm at the LGBT Center, 1800 Market St., Rm 305, SF. Info: newleafservices.org or ligaletto@ earthlink.net.

Faerie Coffee East Bay - Check in with the faerie fam every Saturday! Cum whistle with these witches. 12p- 2p(ish) at Celtic Coffee Company, 142 McAllister between Leavenworth & Hyde.

Faerie Coffee - Radical Faeries get together for a nice brunch and delightful conversation. Around noon every Saturday and Sunday at the Celtic Coffee Company, 142 McAllister btw Leavenworth and Hyde. Info: www. radfae.org.

Cockfight at Underground SF – First and third Sat. DJs Earworm, MyKill, and DCNSTRCT. $7,9p-2a.

Underground SF, 424 Haight Street, SF, (415) 864-7386.

Shootin’ with Care - Slide show hosted by Terry and the Peer Educators of the Speed Project. Get the skinny on circulation basics, what happens when a vein collapses, avoiding abscesses, tracks, bacterial infections; the pro’s and con’s of different spots; tips to avoid sharing hepatitis and HIV when partying in groups; alternatives to injecting for folks who want to take a break. Come share what you know; the only real expert in the room is you! All welcome to this free slideshow. Come high, come low, come as you are! Drop by any time between 7p-10p at 117 6th S(the 6th street exchange btw Mission/ Howard), SF. www.tspsf.com Events Line: 415 788-5433.

Same-Sex Ballroom Dance - 4:305:30pm mixed level Salsa. 5:30p-6:30p beginning American Rumba. At Cheryl Burke Dance, 1830 17th St. @ De Haro, SF. $15 per person drop-in, cheaper when you buy in bulk!

Instructor: Emily Coles, www.emilycolesdance.com. These classes are geared toward the LGBTQ community.

No partner or experience needed! A variety of ongoing classes. 415-3058242 balboabattle.com.

3rd Saturday Swing and Salsa Dance - Meet new people and learn dance for FREE with no partner or experience!

7-11 pm Magnet at 4122 18th at Castro. www.queerjitterbugs.com.

Hayes Valley Follies - Marlena’s hosts a weekly revue of the most titillating Bay Area talent featuring drag, singers, syncers, dancers, impersonators and more. 10p at 488 Hayes St., SF. Info: marlenasbarsf.com or 864- 6672.

Wilde Chats – A loosely structured community-driven group get together every Saturday morning to discuss specific issues affecting us as gay men and our gay community. The group is lead following a “Socratic” model; rather than talk about solutions and answers to problems, the idea is to expand on the days topic by analyzing it and breaking it up into other ques-

tions. The discussions typically focus on the hidden/unspoken assumptions, generalities and concepts that we as gay men make, and the differences that our various points of reference imply.

1st, 3rd, 5th Sat, 11:30a-1p. Thai House Restaurant at 2200 Market Street @ Sanchez. Info www.isparksf. com.

Sundays

Bad Movie Night - Every Sunday, come on out to The Dark Room in the Mission to see a crummy movie, scarf down popcorn, and listen to the hilarious ravings of special rotating hosts chosen from the brilliant comedic flock of freaks circling our fair city. $5, 8p at The Dark Room Theatre, 2263 Mission St., SF. Info: darkroomsf.com.

Jock Sundays @ Lookout - A weekly Sunday afternoon/ early evening, highenergy jump fueled by a rotating cast of superstar DJs, including: Stefanie Phillips, Luke Fry, Pornstar, Joseph Lee and Pam Hubbuck. Packed every Sunday with hot, sweaty, jocular boys - and girls - JOCK is ALL-STAR! Every week proceeds benefit an LGBTQ sports group. 3p, $2 door. At Lookout, 3600 16th St. at Market, SF. Info: 415431-0306 or lookoutsf.com.

DECO’s Amateur Strip Night - The audience at the Deco Lounge every Sunday will vote to award one lucky amateur stripper a CASH PRIZE. Join emcee Nick Parker, DJ Lambchop, hot strippers and good tippers(hopefully) At The Deco Lounge, 510 Larkin St., SF. Every Sunday, sign ups at 9p, showtime at 10p. No cover. Info: decosf. com.

Sunday’s A Drag - Harry Denton’s Starlight Room hosts a weekly brunch featuring San Francisco’s finest drag performers and hosts Donna Sachet and Harry Denton. Two shows every Sunday, 12p and 2:30p. $30 for brunch and show at Sir Francis Drake Hotel, 450 Powell St., SF. Info/res: 395-8595.

Mondays

Bay Area Young Positives drop-in group - Drop-in support group for young HIV positive people. 701 Oak St., SF, 7p – 9p. Info baypositives.org, (415) 487-1616.

Duplicate Bridge - QuickTricks Bridge Club, 7p, ACBL duplicate open and 299’er events. Meets in Ellard Hall of Most Holy Redeemer Church, thru gate on Diamond St. at 18th Street. Lesson series too. Info: www.quicktricks.org.

Monday Night Knit - Knit-Knit-PurlPurl! Knit-Knit-Purl- Purl! If you haven’t gotten your fixin’ of stitchin’, knittin’ and purlin’, come on down to the LGBT Center where knitters and crocheters will be bonding over coffee. Every Monday, 6:30p at 1800 Market St., SF. Info: 235-4821.

Gay Mondays at the Etiquette Lounge - A weekly social to benefit the SF LGBT Center with DJs Jeff Stallings and Luke Fry. 7p-12a at 1108 Market St., SF. Info: etiquettelounge. com.

Shooting with Care Slide Show - If you or a friend injects, you are cordially invited to join a conversation about safer injection, vein care and harm reduction hosted by the Speed Project.

The Ivy street needle exchange is open 7p-9p and is a great exchange for those concerned with privacy. Drop by anytime between 7p-9p at Tom Waddell Garage, 50 Lech Walesa/Ivy Street near Polk and Grove, SF. Free! Come high, Come low! www.tspsf.com.

Ten Percent - LGBT-TV for Northern California Mondays - Thursdays, 11:30a & 8p on Comcast Hometown Network Channel 104 in Northern California.

Tuesdays

Feminist reading circle: Origin of the Family, Private Property and the State - A roundtable discussion of Frederick Engels’ classic work on the persistent problem of women’s inequality and how it can be overcome. On Tuesdays beginning November 1,7pm - 8:30pm, 747 Polk St, SF, $2 suggested donation per session. Everyone welcome. Sponsor: Radical Women.

For more information, call (415)8641278 or email baradicalwomen@earthlink.net.

New FTM/transmasculine group @ TRANS THRIVE - Groups are open to female-to-male (FTM) people, transguys, butches, studs, genderqueers, two-spirited, third-gendered, questioning folks, trannyfags, trannyboys, boy-

dykes, transmen, papis, transmasculine folks and whatever else you call yourself. About once a month we have a special event. Every Tuesday from 6p-7:30p Check online calendar for details. TRANS: THRIVE, 815 Hyde St., 2nd Floor/ Info http://www.transthrive.org.

Youth Meal Night - Tuesdays from 5 p-8:30p at The Center (1800 Market at Octavia, SF) - this weekly program provides homeless, marginally housed and foster care youth up to 24 years with a nourishing meal, welcoming environment, film screenings, art projects, discussions and a wide array of different community building activities.

For more info please contact Beck at 415-865- 5560 or beck@sfcenter.org Buddhist Meditation - Renowned Buddhist Teacher, Tessa Logan, teaches drop-in meditation classes on Tuesday evenings, 7p-8:45p at the Kadampa Buddhist Temple, 3324 17th St., SF. Everyone is welcome. $10 donation. NOTAFLOF. www.meditationinnortherncalifornia.org or 415-5031187.

Gay Men’s Sketch - Weekly male figure drawing group. Professional, yet intimate and relaxed. Classical nude modeling by a gay male model. Five 2min gestures, one 15-min pose & four 20-min. poses. 6:30p - 9:30p. Intimate South of Market home studio, open drawing session, no instruction. A nice group of gay guys - friendly, supportive and non-competitive - who loves drawing the male nude in gay male company. The group is open to men and women of all persuasions . To reserve space, call day of the group that you want to attend: Mark - 415- 621-6294.

Weight Watchers LGBTQ Meeting registration and weigh-in starts at 6p, discussion at 6:30p. At the Finnish Brotherhood Hall, 1970 Chestnut St., Berkeley. Questions? jeanne.obrien@ weightwatchers.com .

HIV Support Group - Newly diagnosed? Just coming to terms with your diagnosis? This group is for you to help you with your HIV diagnosis. Positive Force hosts a weekly drop-in group for you. It’s a great place to get emotional support and information. For info contact Ramon Martinez at 415-575-0150 ext 219 or rmartinez@stopaids.org.

Drop in every Tuesday 7p- 7:30p at STOP AIDS Main Office , 2128 15th St., btw Sanchez and Noe, SF. St. James Infirmary for Sex Workers Free, confidential, non-judgmental medical care, massage, acupuncture, peer and substance use counseling, legal and social service referrals and a food/clothing bank. You can check your email, get a chair massage, or face acupuncture while you wait and talk to other sex workers. If you get a treatment, its not just a clinic, you can hang out with all your friends who you never knew were hookers, too! Tuesday 12p3p, Wednesday night from 6p-9p, Thursday 6p-9p. Transgender Health Clinic. Current and former sex workers as well as their partners and families are welcome to drop in. Donations of food, money and clothing welcome.

Info: 554-8494.

Harvey’s Funny Tuesdays - Ronn Vigh and Nick Leonard present the best in Gay and Gay friendly comedy in the heart of the Castro. 9p sharp at Harvey’s, 500 Castro Street (at 18th), SF. FREE Admission, one drink minimum. Every week new funny acts!

Wednesdays

Transbay Monthly Social – For all who identify as transgendered, meets every 2nd Wed, 7pm. Kick back, talk & have a good time. No cameras or tranny cruising, please. Quetzal, 1234 Polk St, SF. www.transbay.org Dream EZ - Every 2nd Wednesday of the month the Easy Lounge hosts a positive space with a great vibe for women to listen to great music. The night features resident DJs Emancipation (Sistah Sunday) and Black (Sweet Boy) as well as rotating guest DJs. 8pm-closing at 3255 Lakeshore, Oakland. Info: easy510. com.

Leathermen’s Discussion Group Discussions and presentations by and for the leather community. Free and open to all adults. Held on the 4th Wednesday of every month, 7:309:30pm at Blow Buddies - Upstairs Community Room, 933 Harrison St, SF. Info: sfldg.org.

Erotic Reading Circle with Carol Queen - Join readers and share your

(continued on next page)

Do you have an ongoing or special event that you want to post in the Bay Times calendar? Send it to calendar@sfbaytimes.com. Events from all over the Bay Area are welcome. Please send special events at least 2 weeks in advance.

2 0 BAY TIMES NOVEM B E R 3 , 2 0 1 1

(ART OF LIVING continued from page 1) mors traveled outside the liver; yes, it is inoperable; no, there are no treatments now; yes, no transplant now; yes, travel now; yes, affairs in order now; yes, sorry now and beyond, etc., etc., and… scene.

Since late 2005, I’ve been battling Stage II Primary Hepatocellular Carcinoma (liver cancer). The Stage II is determined by the standard TNM (Tumor Size/Lymph Nodes Involved/Tumor Metastases) system, long the system used to determine where someone is in their cancer journey. As of 12/20/10 it is now Stage IVa, the second to the last on the TNM system.

the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.” Elisabeth Kübler-Ross That quote always held a special place for me, and now its meaning truly found layers of resonance I’d not previously known. Now, it brilliantly illuminates my path.

There are many panes - and pains - in my life. The Art of Living requires we look through many windows, numerous lenses, ref lecting upon not only our own experience, but hopefully magnified by someone else’s experience.

I wasn’t technically dealing with liver cancer in 2005 initially, though elevated lab numbers and the keen eye of a tech perusing old scans discovered that yes, it had been present yet unnoticed while I was battling another type of cancer. At that time I was working with a major television sitcom star of the late 1960s, a star whose family name is aligned with the one of the best cancer care centers in the country, but I’ll get to That Girl later.

There is no manual to prepare you for… this. The Unknown. Coming to the End of Life. Okay, Kübler-Ross aside, but personally I get those stages mixed up. Truth-be-told, it’s much like the joke in one of my favorite films, All That Jazz - it sounds like a law firm: “Anger, Denial, Bargaining, Depression & Acceptance, can you hold please?”

Nine to 11 months. I’d had several other prognoses and disregarded them, knew I’d blow past them. And blow past them I did. Yet this prognosis, this felt right. Well, not right so much as correct. Correct-ish. Which made accepting it easier for me. I was ready for what darkness, what light was ahead.

What makes the unknown familiar, and therefore something you can move forward towards, is living your life as authentically as you possibly can. Have you shared love simply because you can? Made someone laugh because it was the right thing to do - even at the wrong time? Challenged someone when they have stepped over the boundaries of what you define as justice? Made a choice that wasn’t popular but did it because you were

“People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when

Sure, I can hold. For about 9 to 11 months. Or longer.

(ROSTOW continued from page 5) called to? Held yourself accountable... or just held yourself ? Dared to Believe, Risked to Create, Expected to Transform? More importantly, have you stopped to realize how pretty freakin’ amazing you are?

I don’t have answers to a lot of the previous queries. I do have perspective having helped others through their transitions. And I hope that, even with my foibles, I’ve lived the best that I can. I believe I have. I’m still working at it. For another 3 to 5 months. Hopefully longer.

If I live, then I’m a liver, right? Bad pun, yes - admit it, though, with the word play with my liver cancer, you had to have some reaction! And I give credit where credit is due on the liver joke (my friend & love Laurie).

So, if you care to join me on this journey, c’mon along. Take what you want, do what you feel, feel what you do.

The Art of Living.

Love it.

Mike Ward was a freelance writer and award-winning theatrical artist living in San Francisco with his family: cats Chloe and Katie, closest friend/live-in caregiver/ former partner, Daniel, and his partner Michael, who lived nearby though spent 4/7ths of his time at Mike’s. A bronze medallist in the 1,500 meter run at the 1986 International Gay Games, Mike lived with HIV/ AIDS for 30 years, Hepatitis B for 23 years, and a variety of cancers since 1996, most of which he successfully battled. The Art of Living is full of surprises.

(KAY RYAN continued from page 17) She received t he P u l it zer P r i ze for Poetr y in 2011 for T he Best of It, t he col lect ion of 20 0 poem s her terminally ill partner, Carol Ada i r, helped her assemble a nd sadly, did not see into pr int, dyi n g o f c a n c e r i n 2 0 0 9 . Ry a n su m s up her l i fe ph i losophy i n the title poem, “However car ved up/or pa red dow n we get ,/ we keep on mak ing/the best of it as t hough/ it doesn’t mat ter t hat/ our acre’s down to/ a square foot.

A s/ though our garden could be one bean/ and we’d rejoice if/ it f lourishes, as/ though one bean/ could nourish us.”

Not one for “play ing the game,” Ryan never tr ied to “schmooze” her way i nto t he ‘r ight’ l itera r y circles. By not watching the latest trends or keeping up with hip cult ure, Rya n up -leveled t he qua l-

ity of her work, putting a singleminded focus on the writing.

I n a Pa r i s R e v i e w a r t ic le, Ry a n described why she married Carol Adair t w ice in Ca lifornia - - you remember, 2004 in SF and 2008 in California - “It meant a lot in ter ms of hu ma n r ight s. W hen I f irst met Carol, I was so glad to f ind somebody I could really talk to. There were people who I could drop a stone down and hear it go plunk really fast. But I could drop a st one dow n C a r ol a nd ne ver hear it hit the bottom.”

B e i n g a n “out s ider ” h a s g i ven voice to one of t he world’s most a c c e s s ible p o et s . W h at c a n we t a ke away from K ay Rya n’s unl i kely a c c l a i m? From her qu iet life? That, perhaps, Facebook relationships and Tweets are overrated. T hat, i n t h is cat aclysm ic

(ONGOING EVENTS continued from page 20) erotic writing! Bring something to read or just be part of the appreciative circle of listeners. This is a great place to try out new work (ask for comments if you like), or get more comfortable reading for other people. Longtime writers will bring their latest, newly inspired writers; bring that vignette you scrawled on BART while daydreaming on your way to work! Non-judgmental listening guaranteed; all orientations welcome. Carol Queen and Jennifer Cross host/facilitate this space every 4th Wednesday of the month. Dedicated to erotic writers and readers! $5-up sliding scale, 7:309:30pm, at The Center for Sex & Culture, 1519 Mission St., (btw S. Van Ness & 11th), SF. Info: sexandculture. org.

Fruity Wednesdays - Queer Youth space at Larkin Street. Drop-in Larkin Street Youth Services offers a safe space to Queer Youth every Wednesday. Each week, youth are served a meal, offered showers, peer counseling and a structured program meant to keep the focus on community building. The First Wednesday of the month kicks off with an Open Mic event for youth to perform and get tested for HIV. The second and third Wednesdays are for cultivating the creative process, with the help of Larkin’s Art Department.

The last Wednesday youth are offered workshops on relevant and important issues peers in their community currently face. Drop-In. Larkin Street Youth

Services, 1142 Sutter St., SF, 6p-8p.

Flyers www.facebook.com/pages/ Fruity-Wednesdays.

Job Seekers Internet Workgroup 10a -12p. Participants must be at The

(HRC continued from page 1) Marriage Act should be struck from federal law,” she emphasized. Feinstein was only one in 13 senators to vote against DOMA six years ago when it passed in 1996. “It was wrong then; it is wrong now,” she said. She also opposed Proposition 8 in 2008 that banned same-sex marriage in California. “I believe as you all do that it was a terrible mistake to write discrimination into the California constitution,” she said. “But even as Prop 8 winds its way through the courts, I remain an optimist about the cause of marriage equality in California and across this great country.” She reminded everyone that a decade ago not a single state allowed same-sex couples to marry; but now Washington D.C., Connecticut, Iowa, Massa-

world, we a l l need touchstones.

As LGBT “outsiders” we can embrace our st at us a nd br i ng i nto the world something even greater.

T hat we can honor and hold on to our word shamans in times of doubt or fear. “Poems are better than Tweets – they don’t require a ny elect ron ic equ ipment. T hey c a n lo d g e r i ght i n you r br a i n .

T he y a re by n at u re s hor t . You don’t even have to remember all of them – you can remember just a phrase. That can be something you can turn to in any emergency, good or bad. ..a nd t hat’s exactly what poetr y is for. It’s for the things that really last. Because it lasts.”

Excerpted from Kathleen Archambeau’s next book , Pride and Joy: Inspiration f ro m t h e G re a t L G B T A r t i s t s a n d T hinkers. Expected publication date is in 2012.

“You invited Eric?” asks the dimwit with the ineffective phone. “I thought Eric gave you the creeps.”

What a thing to say in front of Eric!

Who would do that? Not only is Eric hurt and insulted, but the other workers are now suspected of talking behind his back. Let’s just say that cordial professional relationships between Eric and the rest of the group are deeply undermined, thanks to Mr. Slow Phone’s big mouth. Personally, I would not be inviting this jerk to any future taco parties.

I have several more opinions, but it’s time to move on. But before we attempt to scrape up other bits of GLBT news from the bottom of the barrel, I must comment on Herman Cain, who is apparently unaware that China has had nuclear capability since the 1960s.

Look. Who cares whether he harassed someone? Well, we do care, of course.

But the media is all over that story like rats on cheese, while the man’s total ignorance of world affairs is just an afterthought to the press. If you were forced to choose between a candidate who harassed someone, but who knew what was going on in the world, and a perfect husband who could not define “neoconservative,” who never heard of the Palestinian right of return, and who worried about China developing nuclear weapons, who would you pick?

As for Rick Perry, did you see his over-the-top antics at that dinner the other night? I know they say he wasn’t drinking, but he looked looped to me, cackling and smirking like an upperclassman at a frat party.

I’d say these candidates were living on another planet, but frankly I think aliens would be better presidential prospects. After all, they helped us build all those beautiful temples.

They didn’t have to do that. They could have just mined all our gold, but instead they pitched in and made a cultural contribution. Thanks, Ancient Aliens!

Say It Ain’t So, Kim! So, I just read that former NFL Commissioner Paul Tagliabue and his wife Chandler just gave $5 million to Georgetown University. One million of that sum has been set aside to fund the Tagliabue Initiative for LGBT Life; Fostering Formation and Transformation, a program to be run

by Georgetown’s LGBTQ Resource Center.

Pretty impressive. Georgetown, by the way, was the first Catholic university to organize a gay center, which was established in 2008. In related information, my stepson Matthew just got his PhD from Georgetown.

What else is new? Michigan lawmakers are hard at work trying to withdraw domestic partner benefits from public employees, including faculty and staff at the Mitten State’s public universities. The bill, which saves a few million bucks, has passed the house and is pending in the state senate. We’ve already seen the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit strike a similar partner benefit rollback out of Arizona, so we’ll see what happens here. Regardless, it’s amazing to see a state with the economic problems of Michigan take steps to make its public sector and state universities even less competitive.

And did you see that Kim Kardashian is getting a divorce just 72 days after hosting a $10 million televised wedding? Of course you saw that.

Kardashian, who insists she did indeed “marry for love,” is citing irreconcilable differences. She is now, of course, this year’s poster girl for the absurdity of marriage laws, which allow Brittney Spears to get married and divorced in 48 hours, while denying the institution to life partners with decades of shared partnership under their belts.

I should mention, before I go, that the U.S. Supreme Court has decided not to review that case out of Utah where the highway patrol has erected gigantic crosses to mark spots on the highway where officers have lost their lives. The Tenth Circuit ordered the crosses removed, so conservatives were hoping that the High Court would pick them up. Sorry, conservatives. That’s not happening. The Court didn’t explain itself, but Justice Thomas wrote a stern dissent.

Listen. There’s nothing wrong with the state marking the spot and acknowledging the sacrif ice of these men and women. But you can’t select a specific religious faith and use its main symbol for that purpose.

C’mon, people!

Ann’s column appears every week at www. sfbaytimes.com. She can be reached at arostow@aol.com.

Read more @ www.sfbaytimes.com

LGBT Center’s main door lobby at 9:45a to gain access into the building (1800 Market @Octavia, SF). Get ongoing help with your job search at the Center! The Center’s workforce Development Program is pleased to

announce a free, job seekers Internet workgroup. Participants will have access to the Internet, interact with peers to share and receive ongoing advice from a career coach to help manage a productive job search. A

one-on-one drop-in session with David Bach, of the Workforce Development team, is recommended prior to joining the workgroup. For more information, contact David Bach at 415.865.5534 or davidb@sfcenter.org.

chusetts, New Hampshire, Vermont, and most recently New York recognize same-sex marriage. She pointed out that just six years ago Americans opposed same-sex marriage by a margin of 68% to 27% (over 2/3); but today three separate polls show the majority of Americans are now in favor. “That’s a turnaround!” she exclaimed.

sponsored, “and a companion bill in the House of Representatives recently got its f irst Republican cosponsor, and I hope more will see the light.”

do not. Feinstein concluded, “This is the land of the free. DOMA is wrong, and it must be repealed!”

Earlier this year, Feinstein introduced the Respect for Marriage Act in the Senate to strike DOMA from federal law and allow the federal government “to provide basic stability, security, and fairness to the tens of thousands of same-sex couples in the country, including the 18,000 plus in California.” She said 30 fellow senators co-

President Obama has endorsed this bill, and next year the Senate Judiciary Committee will vote to pass the Act. She argued one reason DOMA should be rejected is because it represents “an unprecedented federal intervention as an invasion of traditional states’ authority.” She said DOMA “specifically discriminates against gays and lesbians by writing them out from basic federal rights that serve the other married couples.”

She named just a few of the more than 1,300 rights heterosexual married couples receive that same-sex unions

World champion Rugby player Ben Cohen, chairman of the StandUp Foundation to f ight bully ing in schools, also gave a very moving speech about the subject. Three awards were given at the dinner.

Commander Lea Militello received the Charles M. Holmes Award for her outstanding career in law enforcement since 1981. GOOGLE received the Cor porate Equa lit y Award.

Award-winning journalist Thomas Roberts of MSNBC Live and NBC’s Today received the Visibility Award.

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Financing Is a Reverse Mortgage for You? Are you at least 62 years of age and own your home? Get paid a monthly amount, line of credit or a lump sum payment. You always retain full ownership. Call Lauren Dunlap, Nova Mortgage. (510) 540-7911 / (415) 7532272.

Framing Pelican Art Gallery & Custom Framing Studio. 143 Petaluma Blvd. N, Petaluma. Presenting Today’s

Room Rentals

Seeking Room for Rent Prefer LGBT household Unfurnished up to $600 SF or other Bay Area location plcosta@comcast.net

Parenting

Single Gay Man Desires Sunny Room up to $850. Mature, Responsible, Clean, Humorous, Meditator.

Ed 415-447-4388.

Gay Man Looking to be a Known Donor for a Lesbian/Couple. 5’10’’, excellent health, HIV neg., with high fertility numbers, educated (Masters), athletic, attractive, and descend from two loving and long-lived Spanish families. www.gayfamilyoptions.com item /221

Pets SURF DOG large dog boarding at Ocean Beach. Queer Owned. sfsurfdogs.com. (415) 637-7717

B. Scott Levine 510-763-2300 bscottlevine@gmail.com

Dash Limousine and Sedan Service.

Serving the San Francisco Bay Area… and the World. Meryl Kelso, Owner. info@dashlimo.com, www.dashlimo. com. Phone: 650-400-7277.

El Cerrito Hills-I80-Men: Info: www.rickoz2.com

Monument Markers Art of Remembering: Custom Memorial Markers in Bronze. Sigrid Herr, 510.708.9635. Sigrid@artofremembering.com

Discover the secret spots of Bahia/ Brazil with Leo. Visit www.

TravelingwithLeo.com

Real Estate Tucson, AZ Voted by The Advocate in 2007 as one of the Top Ten Cities for Gays to live. Progressive, Affordable, Beautiful. Thinking of moving or a second home? Call Lia Lopez Tierra Antigua at 520-975-4488 or email tucsonhaven@yahoo.com

Religious Services Celebrate @ Ner Shalom – Your Spirit Deserves Nourishment! Our approach to Judaism is exciting & unorthodox.

We are inclusive & LGBTQI-friendly!

Didgeridog Doggie Daycare & Overnights. Where small dogs play while you’re away! www.didgeridog. com

www.shalomevents.org, 707-6648622. Located in Sonoma County.

DOG TRAINING in Your Home Cindy Gehring, Dog Trainer 408-238-1540, DogHelpNow@gmail. com, www.cindygehring.com

Soko Joshi Judo & Self Defense Club for Women. 415-821-0303 phdshelley@sbcglobal.net

Your dog deserves to be treated with the same love whether you’re at home or away! Call 510-655-5518 for your personalized in-home dog boarding needs in the SF Bay area (Emeryville/ Oakland border) smalldogboarding. vpweb.com

Massage

Professional Concierge At Chore Service415-336-5168 manny@atchoreservicesf

Self Defense

Sports San Francisco Gay Basketball Association’s Open Court Play every Sunday, 5:00 pm, Eureka Valley Recreation Center. www.gaybasketball.com

TRAVEL WITH US. Our members, gay men over 40, have been staying in each others’ homes, having good times, making new friends and saving $$$ as they travel for over 10 years.

Travel Lambda Connections Club. www.TLCclub.net

Join Us at Cafe Flore

Barbara A. Adler, LMFT. Psychotherapy- ConsultationEducation- Training. barbar dlerLMFT.com, 415-990-9137.

Thursday, November 8th

8:00 - 11:00 p.m.

Tax Preparation

USING HYPNOSIS AND NEURO LINGUISTICS

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ST UCK? shift happens Certified career & life coaching by phone (anywhere) www.awayoutofnoway. info

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Gay Relationships: MEDIATOR, Fast solution to problems. One session.

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Watch the returns on a big screen with friends!

Women: Promote great hugs and kisses from your loved ones. Learn how to be in a relationship with others without losing yourself. Profit exponentially from joining a dynamic women’s community and therapy group now. Call Dr. Gabi Kramer (510) 841-8242.

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Soulmates, Playmates or Stalemates?

Negotiating the stages of gay relationships alone can be extremely difficult.

My experience as a gay couples therapist will help you and your partner relieve the stress of dysfunctional communication and enhance the quality and intimacy of your relationship.

Scott Balderson, MFCC (MFC34280).

415-255-6181.

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Election Night

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Free weekly support group forming for gay men dealing with mid-life issues.

Call Kurt for more info. 415-647-3465.

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Does your sex life feel out of control?

Sexual Compulsion Therapy Group for Men is now forming in Berkeley. For information regarding group time, location and fee: Contact Ivan Skolnikoff, MFT at 415-721-4527.

Travel

Shelly Crouse-Monarez. Violin Performer & Mentor. 415-244-8198.

Shellycrouse_monarez@yahoo.com, All Occasion Music, Group and Private Instruction.

You want children, so do I. Let’s talk.

For more information about me, visit http://sites.google.com/site/mike949h/

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Upcoming Events

Tuesday, November 8th Bay Times Election Night Party @ Cafe Flore, 2298 Market Street, SF. Election returns, cocktails, great food and more in a classic Castro location. Co-hosted by Gary Virginia.

List” / Bay Times info tables. 10:00 AM - 5:00 PM. Wednesday, November 16th - Celebrating Doc Misha Cohen’s Birthday with Featured Author KG MacGregor @ “Betty’s List” Literary Salon, Duboce Park Cafe, 2 Sanchez Street @ Duboce, San Francisco. No charge to attend. Co-Hosted

by Carla Wilson. No cost.

6:00 PM - 9:00 PM.

ALL PHOTOS BY PHYLLIS COSTA

Tuesday, November 8 Smart Women / South Bay Moorpark Hotel, San Jose.

Featured Spearker: Jody Cole, Wild Rainbow African Safaris with Cari Hays, Trustee Help - 6:00 PM 8:00 PM.

Manny, Charles, and Robert

Saturday, November 19th Luscious Live! Welcoming the Holiday Season Dance Stephanie Teel & Average Dyke Band @ Roosters, 1700 Clement Ave, Alameda. Preevent tickets onsale now: bettylist.com.

PHOTOS BY PHYLLIS COSTA

Thursday, November 10th “Wine Time!” Holiday Tasting Party - Lake Merritt Hotel’s Terrace Room, Oakland - Featured wineries are Arista Winery & Ispiri Winery with winemaker Leslie Sisneros and more TBA. 6:00 PM - 8:00 PM Fri-Sat-Sun, Nov 11th, 12th & 13th - 33rd Annual Celebration of Craftswomen (Women’s Crafts Fair) @ Ford Mason. Join us at “Betty’s

Sunday, November 27th Ladies Night Special @ Yoshi’s Oakland - Montclair Women’s Big Band - 510 Embarcadero West, Oakland, 5:30 PM Happy Hour / 7:00 PM Performance.

Girls just wanna have fun Stephanie Teel and her trusty guitar!

Information: www.bettyslist.com or 415-503-1375

More News, Stories, and Arts & Entertainment online

@sfbaytimes.com

33RD ANNUAL

THREE DAYS! NEW LOCATION! Friday, Saturday and Sunday Fort Mason Center November 11, 12 and 13 Festival Pavilion, SF 10 am to 5 pm

Admission: $9.00 Seniors, Students, Disabled: $7.00 Children under 12 free For information and tickets: www.celebrationofcraftswomen.org 650-615-6838

The Largest Women’s Fine Crafts Show in the US

There’s waaaay more...

Lesbian Vegetarians, San Francisco Boys of Leather, Gay Men’s Basketball, Queer Armenians, Women Poets, Sex Addicts, Dykes on Hikes East Bay, Questioning Youth, Au Cercle des Amis Franco phones, Creative Philosopher’s Club, Let It All Hang Out, MAX (Men’s Associated Exchange), Barbary Coast Boating Club, LGBTQ Alcoholics Anonymous, Bodybuilding Group, Freewheelers Car Club, Nudes In Art, QuickTricks EasyBridge! Gay Architects & Designers, Lesbian Entrepreneur Club, Rainbow Toastmasters, All Girls Roller Derby Training, Heart of San Francisco Aikido, Crystal Meth Anonymous, Caring Kinksters Munch, and much, much more!

sfbaytimes.com - click on Resource Guide BAY T IM ES NOVEM BER 3, 2011 23