Serving "The Man"

But for years, like most women, I’ve been serving “the man” Literally I’ve toiled away at jobs for crap pay so my bosses could put another Harley in the garage or add Italian marble countertops to their mansion on the hill. I’ve spent decades supporting other people’s college and professional careers, hobbies, and families. And yet, I find myself navigating midlife solo –most recently so the other person could be “selfish – while I absorb a pile of bills structured for two incomes.

My story is not unique (sadly), and I’m not a victim Compared to some in my circle, who have weathered similar (or far worse!) storms, I’ve been fortunate Now, in midlife, I have a measure of freedom I’ve not had before, but it has come at a significant cost

At this age, my tolerance for toxic work environments is zilch, so in January 2022, I had the freedom to start my own business And I did I now pay myself what I’m worth – more than I’ve ever been paid by anyone else. Of course, now I owe “the ultimate man” (Uncle Sam) a healthy sum because I’m actually making a decent living for the first time in my life, BUT at least I have a measure of work freedom I’ve never had before.

Good-bye garbage dialogue

At midlife, we also get to enjoy freedom from the inner dialogues that have not served us The hormonal cocktail that makes us miserable with weight gain and hot flashes does have a silver lining – we stop believing the detrimental bullsh*t we’ve told ourselves our entire lives There was a time in our lives when if someone said, “Why would anyone care what you have to say – you’re not a celebrity” or “You’re a fat, lazy c*nt” (yep, just a couple of the nuggets that have come my way) we believed. It fed pre- existing insecurities. But now we recognize that narcissists and vultures have figured out our weaknesses and insecurities and played into them, briefly succeeding in making us believe the worst about ourselves