LGBTQ San Diego County News Volume 1 Issue 24 September 2020

LGBTQSD.NEWS

SEPTMEBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

SEPTEMBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

LGBTQSD.NEWS

ENTERTAINMENT

DEEP INSIDE HOLLYWOOD P10

BILLY PORTER On His Black Queer Experience and Finally Feeling Like He’s Made It P11 THE FOURTH ANNUAL PRISM AWARDS P13

COMMUNITY VOICES

CONVERSATIONS LIFE BEYOND WITH NICOLE THERAPY Johnson, Rivera, A Guide to Sarria US Postage Healthy Stamps Campaign P7 Assertiveness P8 BIG MIKE & FRIENDS Johan Engman P9

PUBLIC SERVICE

CITY ATTORNEY NEWS Your Mental Health During the Pandemic P5

A NOTE FROM TONI The California State Senate P6

ANOTHER HISTORIC

MARCH ON WASHINGTON, 57 YEARS IN THE MAKING

By Darnelle Williams

I

’m a Black man, lifelong San Diegan and a member of the LGBTQ+ community. I’ve worked in the insurance industry for over 23 years and for the last several years, I’ve volunteered for nonprofit organizations. I’m a member of Mayor Kevin Falconer’s Advisory Board as well as the San Diego County Sheriffs Advisory Board. My proudest achievement is being the founder/director of Take What You Need, which is a weekly free food distribution program. This is my story about my attendance at last week’s March on Washington, which was 57 years in the making.

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“If we are rendered paralyzed, we’re gonna crawl to the polls!”

— Doctor Jamal Harrison Bryant

(Above) Washington, DC, USA - August 28, 2020.

Thousands of people attended the March on Washington at the Lincoln Memorial on the 57th anniversary of the 1963 march led by Martin Luther King, Jr. (photo by Allison C Bailey/Shutterstock.com) (Below) Darnelle Williams in front of the Lincoln Memorial attending the March on Washington. (courtesy photo)

NEWS

SUPERVISOR NATHAN FLETCHER Named ‘Legislator of the Year’ P4 COURT NEWS Sentencing for Bank Robberies and 2019 Pride Threats P5

HIV SERVICE PROVIDERS HAVE BEEN CRITICALLY AFFECTED BY COVID-19

AIDS WALK & RUN SAN DIEGO CAN HELP!

By Aaron Heier, NCPT, HIVPCP Director of Sexual Health & Welcome Services The San Diego LGBT Community Center

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ow more than ever, agencies like The Center and other organizations that benefit from the annual AIDS Walk & Run San Diego need our community’s help to continue. These organizations provide food, housing, medical care, legal assistance, transportation, mental health services, and so much more to those living with HIV. As a volunteer, participant, and current Director of Sexual Health at The San Diego LGBT Community Center, I’ve been involved with AIDS Walk & Run San Diego since 2000.

For 20 years, I’ve been committed to raising money and awareness so that life-saving and life-sustaining resources for those living with HIV remain available and accessible. Over the years, I’ve met countless people who have benefited from the money raised during AIDS Walk & Run San Diego, and their admiration and gratitude is incredibly humbling. Many of them were in desperate, dark places with no access to health care, no insurance, and at risk of becoming homeless. Funds raised through AIDS Walk & Run San Diego helped them find case managers, apartments, doctors and — even better — access to employment!

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COVER STORY

SEPTEMBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

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March on Washington continued from Page 1 In the first quarter of 2020, the devastating effects of the coronavirus started to become clearer. Millions of people lost their jobs and many more were forced to remain at home due to statewide mandates. The continued isolation and uncertainty had an adverse effect on many people. The gravity of our new normal seemingly reached a breaking point on May 25, 2020, when a white police officer, knelt on the neck of a handcuffed Black man for 8 minutes and 47 seconds. George Floyd’s murder was recorded by onlookers as they pleaded with officers to help him, but their pleas were ignored.

Although George Floyd was not the first unarmed Black man to be killed by the negligence of a law enforcement officer, this time was different. The event occurred in broad daylight after Floyd was accused of passing a counterfeit $20 bill; he was unarmed and on his stomach with three officers holding him down. We could see his face clearly in high definition as he narrated his own death and pleaded with the officers by repeating the words, “I can’t breathe.”

At one point, the 46-year-old Floyd called out for his deceased mother before losing consciousness and upon taking his last breath, urinated on himself.

This horrific incident transcended race, age, socioeconomic class and most notably, politics. Although America was enduring the ravages of COVID-19, millions took to the streets to march against police brutality. “Black Lives Matter” became the nation’s rallying cry and no matter one’s gender identity, age, generation or race, unity seemed possible — but like many high-profile incidents, unity was short lived. Some citizens took the opportunity to steal, destroy and deface property. Although the families of recently killed Black men have publically denounced this behavior, some in media and politics have decided such action can be used to their advantage during an election year.

On Tuesday, June 9, 2020, George Floyd was laid to rest. The eulogy was given by Rev. Al Sharpton, and as I watched it live from my living room, I cried. The words spoken by the reverend were compelling. During the eulogy, he talked about the 1963 March on Washington and the parallels that exist today. He announced that on the 57th anniversary, he and Martin Luther King III are going back to march one more time. I was so inspired I booked my flight before he finished his speech.

The march took place on Friday, Aug. 28, 2020 — exactly 57 years after the infamous 1963 March on Washington. Black was the primary race of the attendees, but the crowd was definitely mixed with representation from every ethnic background, which was a welcome contrast to the photos I’ve seen from the first march in 1963.

Wearing a black sports coat, jeans and a face mask, I arrived around 9:30 a.m., stood in line for a temperature check and was given an additional mask, sanitizer, gloves and offered a complimentary rapid COVID-19 test.

Wearing a mask in 92-degree heat with 53% humidity made it difficult to breathe, but seeing my elders endure these conditions made me tough it out.

The National Mall was filled with cases of complimentary water and sports drinks as vendors were not permitted.

As I walked along the Reflecting Pool toward the Lincoln Memorial, I could hear individuals speaking and I settled on the steps directly in the center facing Lincoln’s statue. I could see the speakers on the giant screens provided and there were several notable speeches that I found to be inspiring.

Alaya Eastman spoke, she currently attends Trinity Washington University but she spoke as a survivor of gun violence that she witnessed while she was

(photo by Darnelle Williams)

(photo by Allison C Bailey / Shutterstock.com)

(photo by Kamil Zelezik / Shutterstock.com)

a student at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida. She spoke about lying beneath the lifeless body of a classmate in order to survive and emphasized the pervasive gun violence that plagues poor Black communities. Eastman mentioned that the flow of guns into struggling communities is a direct result of poor choices and policies set forth by lawmakers and are often accompanied with racial undertones. She went onto to say gun violence in poor Black communities is not inherent or a coincidence, it’s by design.

Next, was the first Black woman elected to Congress from the commonwealth of Massachusetts, Congresswoman Iona Pressley. She spoke of our Black ancestors, not the ones in the history books but the everyday heroes in our very own communities and how each and every single one of us are examples of social and political progress in this country, but we still have a ways to go.

The most powerful speech of the day was given by Doctor Jamal Harrison Bryant. He began by speaking softly and mentioned a powerful quote from Harriet Tubman who said, “I freed thousands of slaves, and I would have freed hundreds more; had they known they were slaves.” The paralysis of fear was a running theme throughout his speech. He spoke about not being paralyzed when it comes to voting this November because of Kamala’s past as a prosecutor without thinking about what she wants to accomplish on behalf of our future — like abolishing privatized prisons, no more mandatory minimum sentences and the legalization of marijuana. He spoke about not being

(photo courtesy of Darnelle Williams)

paralyzed when it comes to support of Black Lives Matter because the founders are three lesbians, because members of the LGBTQ+ community are our sons, daughters, brother, sisters, friends and neighbors. He spoke about the recent shooting of Jacob Blake, now paralyzed after being shot seven times in the back by a police officer. With a loud voice he spoke about the resiliency of Black people stating, “If we are rendered paralyzed, we’re gonna crawl to the polls! You take away the mailboxes, we’re still gonna crawl! You take away polling stations, we’re still gonna crawl!

Like a butterfly, we’ve got two options, we’re gonna crawl or we’re gonna fly!”

And lastly, Rev. Al Sharpton gave a moving and inspirational address to the 150,000-plus attendees. He began by speaking about the men and women who attended in 1963 and said, “Many of them couldn’t stop along the road to use the restroom because it was against the law, but they came anyhow. Many of them couldn’t stop to eat at a restaurant, because no restaurant would serve them; because it was against the law, but they came anyhow. Many of them couldn’t rest in a hotel overnight but they came anyhow.” He went on to say because they came in ’63, we are able to be here in 2020 by any means of our choice, staying at any hotel and eating anywhere we want to eat. At one point, I began to cry and put my glasses on because of the dozens of news outlets and photographers looking for a memorable shot. He spoke about how coming together is not enough, saying “demonstration without legislation will not lead to change.” The reverend

wants three things to occur as a result of this rally: an end to police brutality, passage of the George Floyd Policing and Justice Act, and the passage of the John Lewis Voting Rights Act. Rev. Sharpton’s speech was motivating and galvanized the audience.

There were additional speeches from individuals from around the country including Martin Luther King III, Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee, Democratic National Committee Head Tom Perez along with family members of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Jacob Blake and many more — including a pre-taped message from Senator Kamala Harris. It was a pleasant surprise that so many speakers mentioned Bayard Rustin, an openly Gay Black man who organized the first March on Washington more than 57 years ago.

As I sit here, I am still digesting the magnitude of this event but I do realize if the people who attended (myself included) don’t work toward change, the trip was all in vain. The sense of community and caring for one another was on full display. Reading the homemade signs gave me a sense of who the person was and why they were there.

The space felt safe, welcoming, and at times spiritual and I believe many left feeling healed. I spoke with an older Black gentleman who said that he prays this is the last time we’ve got to do this, I agreed with him but thought, how do we stop violence from occurring?

The following day, I took a picture of a pin worn by attendees on Aug. 29, 1963, and the message was simple: “Jobs & Freedom.” I guess we’re still looking for a little bit of both in 2020.

COVER STORY

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SEPTMEBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

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Walk & Run San Diego continued from Page 1

As your readers know, The San Diego LGBT Community Center remains deeply committed to the sexual health and wellness of our community and to #BeTheGeneration that ends HIV. For this reason, we continue to offer HIV testing by appointment, as well as twice a month in our Centre Street parking lot with walk-up and drive-thru options, as one of our Emergency Services during the COVID-19 pandemic. It is also why we knew that AIDS Walk & Run San Diego had to happen this year.

We’ve heard from so many community members and service partners that AIDS Walk & Run San Diego brings us together and raises funds to fight HIV in our region like no other one-day event. And this year, we’ve expanded the AIDS Walk & Run San Diego from a one-day experience to a weeklong opportunity, taking place from Monday, Sept. 21 through Sunday, Sept. 27.

This expanded event gives individual runners, walkers, and teams a chance to complete their walk or run over the course of a week, at their own pace, and with their own “socially-distant flair.” Our virtual opening ceremonies are planned to livestream on Saturday, Sept. 26 at 10 a.m. and if participants choose to “run or walk the usual route” of AIDS Walk & Run San Diego on the final weekend, they will find exciting and entertaining surprises along the route.

Registration is only $35 and once you register, you can establish a personal fundraising page with your story, a fundraising goal and more. Donations can be processed safely and easily through your page, and you can send personal thank you messages to your family, friends, classmates, coworkers

and neighbors who donate.

Spearheaded by The Center, AIDS Walk & Run San Diego generates much-needed funds to support services for those impacted by HIV today and the 13 organizations that serve them.

See the list of last year’s fundraising recipients. This event also promotes invaluable HIV education and the effective tools we now have to combat HIV and prevent its spread. AIDS Walk & Run San Diego remains committed to supporting those efforts, including: HIV testing on at least an annual basis; knowing your HIV status and that of your partner(s); utilizing prevention tools including condoms, PrEP and PEP; and staying connected to medical care and medication to get to and maintain an undetectable viral load for those living with HIV. Each year, joining together for our AIDS Walk & Run San Diego is a way to remember those we’ve lost to HIV/ AIDS and to show the more than 18,000 community members living with HIV that they are not alone. And this year, it is an opportunity for all of us to go outside, get some exercise, and safely be “in community” once again.

By participating in AIDS Walk & Run San Diego, you’ll help local service organizations continue our unrelenting efforts to combat HIV in our community.

None of this can be done without your support. We invite everyone to register as a walker, runner, virtual participant, or a team today at www.aidswalksd.org.

For more information on AIDS Walk & Run San Diego, please visit www.aidswalksd.org. You can also contact The Center’s Director of Development Ian Johnson at aidswalk@thecentersd.org or 619-692-2077 x 247.

PHOTOS FROM LAST YEAR’S 30TH ANNUAL AIDS WALK & RUN SAN DIEGO A little drizzle didn’t stop thousands of people coming out for the annual AIDS Walk & Run San Diego on Sept. 28, 2019. Funds raised from this annual event provides monies to support The San Diego LGBT Community Center’s local HIV support services and prevention programs, distributed through several San Diego organizations.

AIDS Walk & Run started in 1985 with community leaders Susan Jester and the late Gary Rees and Albert Bell organizing the first event as the San Diego Walks for Life. (Photos by Big Mike Phillips)

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NEWS

SEPTEMBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

LGBTQSD.NEWS

SUPERVISOR NATHAN FLETCHER NAMED ‘LEGISLATOR OF THE YEAR’

BY DEMOCRATIC PARTY

By San Diego County Democratic Party

O

n August 29th Supervisor Nathan Fletcher received the Legislator of the Year Award from the San Diego County Democratic Party during its 40th Annual Roosevelt Dinner, which was hosted virtually due to the COVID-19 pandemic.

“I am honored to receive this distinguished award,” said Supervisor Fletcher. “Every day I get up with the purpose of improving the lives of the people I serve. I take seriously my responsibility to be the voice for San Diegans who have been unheard for too long. And while we’ve made progress on building a better way for behavioral health, stood-up for immigrants and fought for environmental justice, we have more work to do, and I will continue to fight each day to make our community better.”

The Democratic Party presented Supervisor Fletcher with the prestigious Legislator of the Year Award because against all odds, he’s effectively started to drive change and shape the future of the County of San Diego government, which historically has been run with a conservative mindset. Supervisor Fletcher is the lone Democrat on the Board and has successfully persuaded his colleagues to pass more progressive policies and initiatives.

Supervisor Nathan Fletcher (courtesy photos)

AIDS WALK & RUN SAN DIEGO IS ON! This year’s event has been revamped to provide a safe experience for all, transitioning from a one-day experience to a week-long opportunity for walkers, runners, volunteers, and community members to participate safely — and as enthusiastically as ever!

DiD You See the t-Shirt?

Monday, SepteMber 21 THROUGH

Sunday, SepteMber 27

From Sept. 21 - Sept. 27, runners, walkers, individuals and teams can complete their own Walk or Run using the traditional route or one in their neighborhood, at their own pace. If you run or walk the traditional route on the final weekend, you’ll find exciting surprises along the way!

opening Ceremonies livestreamed saturday, sept. 26 at 10 am!

We all know that part of the fun of any walk or run is getting the t-shirt and this one perfectly captures the moment we are in.

Register for AIDS Walk & Run San Diego and then raise just $65 and it can be yours!

learn more • donate • register

www.aidswalksd.org

By participating in AIDS Walk & Run San Diego, you help support the over 18,000 community members living with HIV/AIDS, and the many more at risk who rely on funds generated from this event for HIV treatment and prevention.

ACHIEVEMENTS SUPERVISOR FLETCHER IS BEING RECOGNIZED FOR INCLUDE: • Leading as the Co-Chair of the County of San Diego’s COVID-19 response by making sure data and science lead the decisionmaking; • Securing $45 million for essential and frontline workers to provide them access to quality affordable childcare; • Driving the County to be more equitable by reinstating the Human Relations Commission, establishing an Office of Equity and racial Justice, increased the oversight of the Citizens Law Enforcement Review Board over law enforcement and creating a countywide Mobile Crisis Response Team so mental health workers can respond to non-violent 911 calls; • Securing support and resources immigrant families seeking asylum by working with nonprofit partners to transform a vacant county building into a migrant shelter that operated last year at the height of Trump’s attack on immigrants; and • His leadership on the environment and transportation through his position as a member of the California Air Resources Board (CARB) and as Chair of the San Diego Metropolitan Transit System.

To learn more about Supervisor Fletcher, visit: www.SupervisorNathanFletcher.com

PUBLIC SERVICE

LGBTQSD.NEWS

SEPTMEBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

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TAKE CARE OF YOUR

MENTAL HEALTH

CITY ATTORNEY NEWS

DURING THE PANDEMIC

Mara W. Elliott —Mara W. Elliott was elected City Attorney of San Diego in 2016 after serving as the chief deputy attorney for the Office’s Public Services Section and legal adviser to the city’s Independent Audit Committee and Environment Committee. Elliott and the lawyers in her section held polluters accountable, reformed city contracting, cut administrative red tape, and strengthened the city’s living wage and non-discrimination in contracting ordinances.

P

rotecting our families during a health crisis requires keeping track of a lot of numbers.

You may be following the frequency of COVID outbreaks, the total cases in your zip code, the county unemployment rate, border wait times, or maybe the entire dashboard of statistics that determine whether schools and businesses are open or closed.

All of these numbers come to bear on the one measurement we don’t talk about enough: the level of our anxiety.

Nearly 50 percent of Americans say the ongoing pandemic is harming their mental health. As your City Attorney, I see every day how that impacts our community – through domestic violence, threats of suicide, and dangerous behavior that requires intervention.

This rise corresponds with warnings from health experts that pandemic-induced stressors – such as job loss, food insecurity, fear, and isolation – can exacerbate mental health issues and increase incidents of substance abuse, depression, and suicidal ideation.

My Office has seen a recent spike in the number of mental health-related Gun Violence Restraining Orders (GVROs), which may be attributable to pandemic-induced stress. GVROs are used to remove firearms from a person who threatens violence or poses a serious risk of harm to themselves or others.

Individuals who have a diagnosed mental illness, or are experiencing a mental health crisis, including post-traumatic stress disorder, dementia, and depression, have been the respondents in nearly half of all GVROs obtained from March through July of 2020.

Stress and uncertainty can also contribute to escalating household tensions. For anyone sheltering in place with an abusive partner or family member, the risks are heightened by their reduced contact with friends and family who might otherwise intervene or report.

It’s important for everyone to be on the lookout for each other, and to thoughtfully respond before situations reach a breaking point.

If you know someone who may be susceptible to domestic violence, and you’ve fallen out of contact because of the pandemic, check in when you know they can talk freely. If your friends or neighbors are elderly, keep in touch, as they may be especially vulnerable to the impacts of isolation. Anticipate trouble before it happens.

The City of San Diego requires safe storage of firearms inside the home. All guns must be locked or disabled at home, unless in the immediate control of the owner. This law prevents children, and people suffering from mental illness or depression from getting ahold of a loaded weapon and acting impulsively.

If you or someone you know needs help dealing with or getting out of an abusive home situation, please contact our Fam-

(image by shutterstock.com)

ily Justice Center at (619) 533-6000 or 866-933-HOPE (4673). For 24-hour assistance, call the San Diego Domestic Violence Hotline at 888-385-4657.

I urge everyone to reflect on how you and your family members are feeling, and to seek help when needed. It’s not weak or embarrassing to seek assistance – it’s an act of caring for yourself and others.

(image by rawpixel.com)

mental health, alcohol and drug services for children, youth, families, adults, and seniors.

• San Diego Access and Crisis Line provides 24/7 counseling for suicide prevention, crisis intervention, community resources, mental health referrals, and alcohol and drug support services.

(888) 724-7240.

HERE ARE SOME RESOURCES YOU MAY FIND HELPFUL: • 2-1-1 San Diego is a 24/7 confidential phone service that connects people with community, health, and disaster services. Dial 2-1-1.

• San Diego Veterans Administration Health System has a 24-hour Veterans Crisis Line to connect callers to caring, qualified responders with the Department of Veterans Affairs, many of whom are veterans themselves. (800) 273-8255.

• San Diego County Health and Human Services Agency (HHSA)-Behavioral Health Services provides an array of

Stay safe and stay healthy, and don’t forget to pay attention to your state of mind and your physical well-being.

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SEPTEMBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

PUBLIC SERVICE / OPINION

LGBTQSD.NEWS

LGBTQ San Diego County News PO Box 34664 San Diego, CA 92163 858.886.9458 PUBLISHER Terry Sidie

A NOTE FROM TONI

ASSOCIATE PUBLISHER Nicole Murray Ramirez nicolemrsd1@gmail.com 619.241.5672

Toni G. Atkins

CREATIVE DIRECTOR Cesar A. Reyes creativedirector@lgbtqsd.news

—Toni G. Atkins represents the 39th District in the California Senate. Follow her on Twitter @SenToniAtkins.

EDITOR editor@lgbtqsd.news

W

hat a month! At midnight on September 1, the California State Senate finished reviewing hundreds of bills as our two-year legislative session came to an end. The end of session is always a crunch time, but this year it was even more complicated because of the measures we had to put in place to keep the public, legislators, and staff safe while doing the people’s business.

The Senate announced in April that we would narrow our bill focus to the most pressing issues facing California, especially the pandemic and economic recovery.

We also sought to find ways to address the great call for change spurred by the murders of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Tony McDade, and too many others, passing several bills to help remove some of the stains of racism from our social fabric. We must keep the legislative momentum going for even more gains.

With COVID-19, as soon as the first stayat-home order took effect, the Senate began developing a path forward for the people of our state. We approved emergency aid, and laid out proposals that will help Californians – including essential workers, first responders, renters, small businesses and working families – keep their housing, reach financial stability and have safer workplaces. Having focused much of my life’s work on affordable housing, which was a crisis before the pandemic, and has been made worse by it, I know much remains to be done in our next session.

SALES sales@lgbtqsd.news Mike Rosensteel 619.865.2220 STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER Big Mike Phillips Bmsd1957@gmail.com 619.807.7324

CALIFORNIA STATE SENATE

THE END OF SESSION IS ALWAYS A CRUNCH TIME In addition to helping meet California’s housing demand, housing production legislation will create thousands of good jobs that strengthen working families and help rebuild the state’s economy.

The $100 million hiring credit we enacted this session will also spur new jobs.

While we had to delay several important bills this year, that doesn’t mean it is the end for them. I postponed my big bill of the year, SB 1100, which would have helped local communities combat sea level rise. This is an issue that is not going away, and must to be part of California’s comprehensive approach to climate change. I appreciate the support and input we have received from Scripps and local climate organizations and I’m excited to build on this good work next

year. In fact, over the next few weeks, I look forward to having conversations here at home and with Californians all across the state on different legislative approaches the Senate should consider when our new session starts in December. I hope you will be part of those discussions.

We are working on a more in-depth recap of the end of session, which I will be sharing with you soon. My office will also continue to provide important information on COVID-19, fires and power outages, and other urgent situations that may develop.

In the meantime, stay safe, stay well, check in on each other, and please, contact me or my office if we can be of any help.

COPY EDITOR Dustin Lothspeich WEB AND SOCIAL MEDIA info@lgbtq.news CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Aaron Heier Big Mike Phillips Chris Azzopardi D’Anne Witkowski Mara W. Elliott Michael Kimmel Neal Putnam Romeo San Vicente Toni G. Atkins

DISTRIBUTION LGBTQ San Diego County News is distributed free every first Friday of the month. © 2020. All rights reserved.

OPINION/LETTERS LGBTQ San Diego County News encourages letters to the editor and guest editorials. Please email them directly to editor@lgbtqsd.news and include your name, phone number and address for verification. We reserve the right to edit letters for brevity and accuracy. Letters and guest editorials do not necessarily reflect the views of the publishers or staff.

SUBMISSION/NEWS TIPS Press releases and story ideas are welcomed. Send press releases, tips, photos or story ideas to editor@lgbtqsd.news. For breaking news and Investigative story ideas, contact the editor by phone or email.

Copyright © 2020 LGBTQ San Diego County News Editor’s Note: The opinions written in this publication’s editorial and opinion pages are the author’s own and does not necessarily represent the opinions of the staff and/or publisher of LGBTQ San Diego County News. The newspaper and its staff should be held harmless of liability or damages.

LGBTQSD.NEWS

COMMUNITY VOICES

SEPTMEBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

Conversations with Nicole Nicole Murray Ramirez —Nicole Murray Ramirez has been writing a column since 1973. He has been a Latino/gay activist for almost half a century and has advised and served the last seven mayors of San Diego. Named the ‘Honorary Mayor of Hillcrest’ by a city proclamation, he has received many media awards including from the prestigious San Diego Press Club. Reach Nicole at Nicolemrsd1@gmail.com and follow him on Twitter @Nmrsd2.

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orth America’s oldest LGBTQ+ organization and its oldest LGBTQ+ civil rights organization have once again joined forces on a historic project and campaign.

The International Imperial Court System of the U.S., Canada and Mexico and the National LGBTQ Task Force have launched a letter-writing campaign to the National Stamp Committee in Washington, D.C. for the issuance of stamps in honor of LGBTQ+ icons Marsha P. Johnson, Sylvia Rivera and Jose Julio Sarria.

Last year, the Imperial Courts and the task force led a successful campaign that resulted in a “National LGBTQ Wall of Honor” at the historic Stonewall Inn in New York City during the 50th anniversary weekend of the Stonewall Riots. Fifty LGBTQ+ pioneers, trailblazers and heroes’ names were placed on the wall and five more were added this year, as will be each year.

LGBTQ+ Americans have helped build this great nation and have indeed been and are a part of the great fabric of America.

And thus, distinguished LGBTQ+ Americans should have streets, buildings, holidays, schools, and yes, stamps also named after them as other communities’ distinguished members have been so honored.

The International Imperial Court System led the successful letter-writing campaigns that not only resulted in a Harvey Milk postage stamp but the naming of the U.S.N.S Harvey Milk, which is now being built in San Diego at the NASSCO Shipyard. The Imperial Courts now have 71 chapters in cities across the U.S., Canada and Mexico after being founded in San Francisco in 1965. The Harvey Milk postage stamp was first unveiled at the White House with many LGBTQ+ national leaders and activists in attendance including such allies as Speaker Nancy Pelosi and the late Congressman John Lewis. A postage stamp has been issued in honor of the late astronaut Sally Ride, who happened to be a Lesbian. The issuing of U.S. postage stamps in honor of Johnson, Rivera and Sarria will be honoring legendary and iconic activists who were drag queens/Trans heroes of the LGBTQ+ civil rights movement in the 1960s.

I have often referred to Jose Julio Sarria as the “Rosa Parks of the LGBTQ+ rights movement.” Jose was a proud Latino veteran of War World II and in 1960, became the first openly Gay candidate to run for public office. In 1965, he founded the International Imperial Court System when he was crowned Empress I of San Francisco. Former San Francisco Supervisor Bevan Duffy and I led a successful campaign that resulted in a street in San Francisco being named after Jose, which is right next to the Harvey Milk City Library in The Castro neighborhood.

Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera are iconic heroes of the 1969 Stonewall Riots in New York City, which many

JOHNSON, RIVERA, SARRIA U.S. POSTAGE STAMP CAMPAIGN

consider the spark that resulted in the modern-day LGBTQ+ civil rights movement and the beginning of the first “Pride Parades,” which are now celebrated around the world. The governor of New York recently announced that a state park will be named after Marsha P. Johnson and the mayor of New York City has announced that two statues of Johnson and Rivera will be soon dedicated in the Greenwich neighborhood.

Recently, the city of San Diego’s Human Rights Commission made history once again (as it did for the Harvey Milk postage stamp) when it became the first government body to officially endorse the

Johnson, Rivera and Sarria stamp campaign and send a letter to the National Stamp Committee in Washington, D.C. Rea Carey, executive director of the National LGBTQ Task Force, and I are honored to be national co-chairs of this stamp campaign as well as the Bayard Rustin stamp campaign. It is our hope that in a future Biden/Harris administration and with the appointment of a new postmaster general that our LGBTQ+ stamp campaigns will be successful especially in the year of the 55th anniversary of the Stonewall Riots.

For further Info: Nicolemrsd1@gmail.com

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SEPTEMBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

COMMUNITY VOICES

LGBTQSD.NEWS

‘PLEASE PASS THE SALT’: LIFE BEYOND THERAPY

A GUIDE TO HEALTHY ASSERTIVENESS

Michael Kimmel —Michael Kimmel is a licensed psychotherapist who specializes in helping LGBT clients achieve their goals and deal with anxiety, depression, grief, sexually addictive behavior, coming out, relationship challenges and homophobia.

Contact him at 619-955-3311 or visit lifebeyondtherapy.com.

W

hen you’re having a meal with someone, it’s easy to say: “Please pass the salt.” You calmly ask for what you want, no big deal. Healthy assertiveness is like that: you don’t have to get angry, nor do you need to be embarrassed to speak your truth. You can say it in the same way you’d say, “Please pass the salt.”

Try saying that out loud. This is what assertiveness sounds like: reasonable and non-threatening. If you’re trying to be assertive but you sound angry, it’s probably aggression you’re feeling. If you feel sad or embarrassed when you want to be assertive, you’re likely being passive.

I hear my clients say, “I hate conflict.

How can I avoid it?” Unfortunately, conflict is unavoidable. However, a conflict doesn’t have to be an argument or a fight, it just means that there are two people with different opinions. As human beings, we interact with other people and, inevitably, disagree with some of them.

This is where healthy assertiveness can save the day!

Let’s say that you want to go to Idyllwild for the weekend and your travel buddy wants to go to Palm Springs. How do you resolve it? You could be sneaky and manipulative, try to guilt trip them, intimidate them or play the victim. All of these primitive strategies may work, but they make life ugly. Instead, why not be calmly assertive and say, “I would really like to go to Idyllwild this weekend” and give your reasons why.

(image by shutterstock.com)

Now, let’s bring “healthy boundaries” into the mix: let’s say that your travel buddy isn’t willing to give you what you want. Will you be respectful in your disagreement? Or do you say things like, “We never go where I want” or “You’re such a spoiled brat.” If so, you’re not playing fair.

How you define what’s “fair” is determined by your boundaries of “fairness.”

When someone crosses your boundary, it feels bad. You may feel disrespected or belittled. If you’re passive, you may just roll over and play dead, saying to yourself, “Oh well, whatever, it’s not worth speaking up.” If you’re aggressive, you may decide, “I want to win this argument” and you do and say anything you need to in order to get your way, regardless of the emotional cost to the relationship.

If you’re assertive, however, you speak your truth in your “please pass the salt” voice and then listen – really listen – to what the other person is saying.

Then the two of you can see where you stand. Here are three ways the discussion could go.

PASSIVE STANCE: “I’d like to go to Idyllwild this weekend.”

“Forget it; I want to go to Palm Springs.”

“Oh, all right (sigh). That’s fine.”

(This person gave up on having their needs met.

They’ll probably resent their partner and passive-aggressively “poke” them during their time in Palm Springs to get some kind of revenge.)

AGGRESSIVE STANCE: “I’d like to go to Idyllwild this weekend.”

“Forget it; I want to go to Palm Springs.”

“I’m tired of doing what you want. I’m not going to Palm Springs.”

“Well, I’m sure as hell not going to Idyllwild.”

“Fine, I’ll go by myself.”

“You do that. I’ll have more fun without you in Palm Springs anyway.”

(See how this conversation escalates anger, ultimatums and manipulation?)

ASSERTIVE STANCE: “I’d like to go to Idyllwild this weekend.”

“I was hoping we could go to Palm Springs instead.”

“I hear you. Idyllwild really appeals to me because ¬______.”

“Yeah, well, I prefer Palm Springs because ______.”

“Could we go to Idyllwild this weekend and Palm Springs in two weeks?”

“How about Palm Springs this weekend and Idyllwild in two weeks?”

(Notice how respectful and clean this conversation is? We don’t know how it will end, but it will probably end with both people feeling good about themselves, and each other.)

As the election gets closer, we can expect to have plenty of opportunities to practice handling conflict, setting fair boundaries and being assertive. And, when in doubt, remember: “Please pass the salt”! It’s a good touchstone (I use it myself…a lot).

“Unfortunately, conflict is unavoidable.

However, a conflict doesn’t have to be an argument or a fight...”

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COMMUNITY VOICES

SEPTMEBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

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BIG MIKE AND FRIENDS Big Mike Phillips —Big Mike Phillips is an activist, fundraiser, bartender and photographer who has lived in San Diego for 30 years. He has helped create two nonprofits and raised hundreds of thousands of dollars for charity. He has been a photographer for more than 25 years and has recorded our LGBTQ history not only in San Diego but around the country, including three LGBTQ marches on Washington D.C. Contact Big Mike at 619-8077324, or bmsd1957@gmail.com.

S

an Diego is not only paradise, which we all are so fortunate to live in, it is also full of so many incredible different types of treasures. I know this to be true for myself after living here for 31 years now as of Aug. 18, 2020, as I have encountered a treasure chest full of them.

They range from people, places, art, food, historical sites, parks, ocean and anything and everything in between that gives joy to so many that call San Diego home. I try extremely hard to always pay attention to my surroundings and always be open to meeting new people. I had a friend once tell me: “Never judge people before you get to know them, they just might wind up becoming one of your dearest friends.” That has happened more than once in my life.

It excites me to introduce to you one of the treasures I discovered in San Diego.

He is a young and kind gentleman I met in 2011 with a mutual friend, Wally Schlotter. He took me to lunch at this brandnew restaurant on University Avenue called the Fig Tree Cafe. After we were seated, Johan came out to say hello to Wally and in return, he introduced me to the restaurant’s owner, Johan Engman.

Right away, I was taken by his youth, good looks, and charming way with people. One thing I was immediately impressed with was that Johan offered a food item off his menu that benefited a charity organization. What really touched me was he had chosen the Rob Benzon Foundation to benefit from every burrito that was sold.

You see, Rob Benzon was one of my best friends I lost in a drowning accident in Acapulco years before. Several of his dear friends and myself created the Rob Benzon Foundation to keep his name alive by helping others. Sometimes we have signs that pop up in our lives for a reason; I am glad I noticed that one.

Johan is from a small town in north Sweden called Ostersund. You can hear it in his accent when he speaks. Being full of wonder and wanting to experience more of life than he was getting in Sweden, he moved to San Diego when he was only 16 with his mom. Johan’s goal was to see what it would be like to begin high school in the states; he loved it and ended up staying. With the love and support of his incredible sweet mother Leann, while still in high school and at the age of 17, he moved out on his own. Loving the opportunities that San Diego showed him gave him determination to learn and succeed; he worked nights to pay his rent.

After graduating from high school, he signed up to go to City College, went to his first class and then never went back.

I love the way Johan tells it: “I did go to college but for only 60 minutes.” It’s not that he did not want to learn but he was itching to be creative, explore and wanted to learn by being hands-on. Johan took it upon himself to start as busboy, waiter, worked in the kitchen, as well as bartended to learn and know what it takes to be able to be successful in every position it’d take to make his own restaurant work.

To me, that is true research and hands-on experience, not only learning the craft but realizing that restaurant work is not easy especially after experiencing how hard it was to work each of those positions. He gave himself 2 1/2 years as a goal to open his first restaurant, telling himself if it did

JOHAN ENGMAN Johan Engman and Big Mike (courtesy photo)

Johan Engman & his family (courtesy photo)

not happen, then he would move on to something different. With determination and hard work, his goal became reality. On Oct. 9, 2008, Johan opened his first restaurant, the Fig Tree Café in Pacific Beach, on a shoestring budget of $45,000. Though his first years would be full of ups and downs, he was determined to build his dream.

After three months of losing money, Johan was faced with a tough decision. He was torn with the thought of closing his dream or come up with a way to keep the doors open. People were whispering in his ear, “The economy is terrible, Johan, nobody would blame you for closing.” With his stubbornness and his determination combined, he made the decision that under no circumstances would he throw in the towel. So began his idea of limiting the hours of operations for the restaurant as much as possible. To top it off, he finagled his way into a full-time job with an accounting

department of a pharmaceutical company with absolutely no experience. Johan told me he learned to always say “yes” to an opportunity that will knowingly help you, and if you have no idea what you are doing then you better learn fast. Which he did. Johan managed to pay personal bills and offset the losses of the restaurant for three years after first opening until Fig Tree Café finally turned a profit. In 2011, Johan left the corporate job and opened Fig Tree Café’s second location in Hillcrest.

This is when and where I met Johan. Then followed a third location in Liberty Station in 2013.

Johan has always been an avid world traveler; it is his way of recharging his batteries, while being inspired by new countries, cultures and cuisines. As Johan told me his story, he vividly remembers being in a hut next to the Danum River in the rainforest of Borneo while it was pouring down rain. Thinking about how to improve Fig Tree Café, he decided

to conceptualize a new restaurant, utilizing what he had already learned. Simplifying things for the concept and knowing breakfast was a severely underserved market, he knew he could grow it.

Twelve hours later, the rain was still pouring, and the name California Breakfast Republic was born. Always adding great ideas such as a heavy emphasis on design and branding, a menu was designed that is unique, with hidden puns and quotes throughout the restaurant for customers to discover. Breakfast Republic later dropped the California and opened its doors in North Park. I remember John taking me there before he had even touched it to show and explain to me his vision when it was still the restaurant from before. His attention to detail, quirky quotes printed on the undersides of the coffee cups, funny and sarcastic sayings on the napkin bands, life-sized “egg” chairs, bathroom “music” and mirrors, along with custom-branded T-shirts and caps were a hit from the beginning. With much success, he has created a brand and business that has proven to be rewarding. San Diego now has many choices of delicious recipes to taste because Johan never gave up.

Due to the coronavirus, all businesses — but especially restaurants and bars (and their employees) — have suffered from mandatory shutdowns. But even this horrible and deadly pandemic has not stopped Johan from giving back, offering free meals not only for his own employees but to anyone who worked in the food and bar industry. Johan has set up Rise & Shine, a nonprofit that all his restaurants donate to. These funds are used so Johan can donate money, food and, in general, help to those in need. Throughout the coronavirus pandemic, they have donated 6,479 meals (to the tune of $52,363) to laid-off workers and hospital workers.

Johan and his gorgeous wife Yasmin, their son River and their baby girl who is on her way, named Sienna, and their two dogs are truly a San Diego treasure. I am honored and proud to have Johan and his entire family accept me. I have learned so much from Johan and I consider him a huge mentor in my life.

No matter our age difference, he continues to teach me and helps me be a better person. He is a man who is loyal, kind, compassionate, fair, and very loving. A stickler for details, Johan left me with this quote: “Never let success get to your head, never let failure get to your heart.” I love you, my dear friend. Thank you for all you have given to San Diego. @johansadventures is Johan’s Instagram. And www.riseandshinerg.com is the company website which has links to all the restaurants.

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ENTERTAINMENT

SEPTEMBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

Author Loui

se Fitzhugh

DEEP E INSLIYD WO OD

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Beloved children’s novel “Harriet The Spy,” by Lesbian author Louise Fitzhugh, has endured through the decades, almost certainly bolstered by the fandom of young Queer kids who found in it a smart, industrious baby butch (who, let’s be real, was also kind of a brat, but in a great way). Harriet ruled her little corner of 1960s Manhattan, trying to learn everything about everyone, spying on and writing about people who caught her attention. Great news, then, that more than 20 years after the live-action feature film version, it’s being adapted for an animated series on Apple TV+, with the title role voiced by Beanie Feldstein – herself a young Lesbian and rising star – and co-starring Lacey Chabert and Jane Lynch. More cause for celebration: it’s written

by Will McRobb, who created the legendary and legendarily odd ’90s kid-sitcom, “The Adventures of Pete & Pete.” Parents, bookmark this one and help your precocious kid grow up properly.

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cente is Romeo San Vi e law. because it’s th es to ta po sweet

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LESBIAN CARTOON ALERT: THE RETURN OF ‘HARRIET THE SPY’

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LGBTQSD.NEWS

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Universal)

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CONNECTING,’ THE COVID SITCOM COMING SOON

ROBIN ROBERTS PRODUCING MAHALIA JACKSON BIOPIC

It was inevitable. First, there was the “30 Rock” remote reunion, then one from the late, great cult sitcom “Happy Endings.” This month, the horror movie “Host” – directed remotely and shot entirely via Zoom – premiered on streaming platforms. And here comes “Connecting,” a new sitcom for NBC, about a group of friends trying to stay close through video chats during the current global health crisis. Created by Martin Gero and Brendan Gall (“Blindspot,” “The Lovebirds”), it stars “30 Rock” regular Keith Powell, Ely Henry (“Suburgatory”), Preacher Lawson (“America’s Got Talent”), Jill Knox (“Keith Broke His Leg”), Otmara Marrero (“StartUp”), as well as Queer cast members Parvesh Cheena and (“Crazy Ex-Girlfriend”) and Shakina Nayfack (“Difficult People”). They’ve been given an eight-episode order, and if it goes well both on-screen and off, maybe the characters will all get to leave their houses and hang out again. Someday.

emed ever LGBTQ-th unces its first Lifetime anno t Up’. (courtesy Lifetime) Se ‘The Christmas

You know her as a host on “Good Morning America,” but Robin Roberts has also broken into the producing game, one of the few Queer Black women to do so. She’s responsible for the TV movie “Stolen by My Mother: The Kamiyah Mobley Story,” and will now develop four more films for Lifetime under her Robin Roberts Presents banner. The first to be announced is going to take you to church: “Robin Roberts Presents: The Mahalia Jackson Story,” a biopic of the legendary Grammy-winning gospel singer and civil rights activist. Born in 1911, Jackson’s long and revered gospel career placed her squarely in the center of the civil rights movement, performing for an integrated audience at Carnegie Hall, at John F. Kennedy’s inauguration, and at the 1963 March on Washington. “Orange is the New Black” star Danielle Brooks, herself a Grammy winner and Tony Award nominee for “The Color Purple,” will play Jackson. We’re looking forward to this one, and to some gospel karaoke from the privacy of our couch.

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LIFETIME SETTING UP A ‘CHRISTMAS SET UP’ You always knew it would be Lifetime that would go full-tilt Queer Christmas first.

Sure, Hallmark just announced they were taking steps to make their annual slate of holiday movies more inclusive of people who are not white and straight, but everybody who watches this sort of thing is aware that Lifetime is the more daring network. (So what if that daring mostly involves movies about suburban swingers trying to murder each other? It’s the thought that counts.) Which brings us to “The Christmas Set Up,” the first made-for-TV holiday movie to center a Gay male relationship. It’s about a lawyer from New York City, returning home to Milwaukee for Christmas with his meddling mother, who’s arranged for her son to “accidentally” run into his old high school crush, now a very successful computer person in Silicon Valley. Just as stockings are about to be stuffed, along comes a job offer in London that threatens to tear up this wholesome homosexual reunion. What will happen at Christmas? You already know the answer, so watch it when it airs just to prove that homophobes don’t hold a patent on enjoying room temperature romance.

ENTERTAINMENT

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SEPTMEBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

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BILLY PORTER:

BLACK, GAY, AND OUT OF F*CKS

‘POSE’ POWERHOUSE ON HIS BLACK QUEER EXPERIENCE, UPCOMING MEMOIR A ND FINALLY FEELING LIKE HE’S MADE IT

By Chris Azzopardi (courtesy images)

“N

ow that I have a massive platform, and now that the people want to listen to the Black sissy, I’m gonna talk,” Billy Porter says, fired up, leaning into the camera. On Zoom, Porter commands a computer screen like he does a red carpet.

In this particular moment, his fiery passion stems from a call he received from screenwriter-actress Lena Waithe, who raised an eyebrow after Porter made history as Essence’s first openly gay man to grace the magazine’s cover. Porter says Waithe got him on the phone to talk about the anonymous letter written by current and former Essence staffers calling themselves “Black Female Anonymous.” The letter was published on Medium on June 28 and called out the magazine for its toxic work environment, just before Porter’s cover story hit newsstands. “I had to stop her,” he says. “I said, ‘I hear you, I see you, I feel you.’”

But Porter simply didn’t know about the letter, he says. Until she called, he hadn’t even seen it. “I don’t give a fuck about social media,” he scoffs, talking about his refusal to be engaged on social platforms. “I don’t adjudicate my life or humanity in sound bites on social media. I don’t fight with nobody, I don’t have Twitter fights.”

The reason, he says, is “I’m 50 years old. Everybody has to remember that I built a career before social media.”

Porter’s mainstream breakthrough, playing ball emcee Pray Tell on FX’s Trans-centric series Pose, is an accumulation of dedication to his craft as a singer and actor that began in his 20s in his hometown of Pittsburgh. He released solo albums that weren’t widely known. He met music industry standards for Black artists (you had to be R&B). And then, later, he dismantled those standards (he could sing show tunes, and did). In 2013, he originated the role of Lola in “Kinky Boots,” which led to both a Tony and Grammy award.

In September 2019, Porter made history as the first openly Black Gay man to win in any lead acting

category at the Emmys for his role on “Pose.” Though winners won’t be announced until Sept. 20, Porter recently received another nomination for his portrayal of Pray Tell.

Despite the pandemic, Porter is remaining prolific.

He recorded an updated version of the 1966 protest song “For What It’s Worth,” which he performed on the first night of the Democratic National Convention, to address our current political landscape; he’s also featured on The Shapeshifters’ disco number “Finally Ready,” which reflects, in part, his decades-long journey living through the AIDS crisis. He’s writing two books, his memoir and a children’s picture book. He also has starring roles in two upcoming films: a liveaction “Cinderella” remake, as the Fairy Godmother, and in out “Love, Simon” director Greg Berlanti’s bigscreen take on “Little Shop of Horrors.”

My recent interview with Porter was scheduled as an audio-only Zoom call, but because not even Porter’s handlers can stop Porter from setting his own rules, he appears on video in a caftan, casually eating in a rented beach house. A bag with “Vote Betches” written on it is propped up in back of him. Expecting to see none of this, I’m in the clothes I went to bed in: a tank top and sweat shorts, with a hat I threw on. I tell Porter that I thought this was an audio-only interview.

Porter responds incredulously; he can’t understand why anyone in their right mind would not use the video feature. “We have Zoom! Why are we not doing Zoom?”

I leap out of my computer chair and run to the closet in back of me, throwing on the first shirt I see. I realize in that moment that Emmy-winner Billy Porter is watching me get dressed. “There is no need for you to put a shirt on for me,” he says with a playful smirk.

It’s early July when we speak, and our interview knows no bounds: from Buddhism, which Porter practices now, to how, even with notoriety, Porter still experiences racism in his everyday life, especially from

those within the LGBTQ+ community. He lay bare his beliefs and opinions, and went off on a variety of other topics too because talking about them, he says, with a rip-roaring laugh, “helps me stay sane.”

I read that you’ve gotten into Buddhism.

Lightly. I’m still learning.

What have you learned, and what drew you to the practice?

What has drawn me to the practice is that it’s a revolt against religion. Religion is man-made. Spirituality is divine. All of the wars that have existed in this world, all of the bullshit that we go through, are in the name of somebody’s man-made God. And I’m over it.

I’m just over it.

I grew up in the Pentecostal Church. They systematically taught parishioners how to hate, disguising it through Bible verses. We’re living in a country right now that is being run by people who say they’re Christians and believe in Jesus and God, and they’re letting people die in the streets. That is not God. That is not Jesus. Y’all can take your Bibles and your religion and shove it. I am so done.

I had people actually say to me back in the day that they were voting for Trump because of his religious values. That motherfucker has been in the church three times, for his three marriages. That’s it. And yet we still sit here every single day and talk about morals.

I can’t do it anymore.

Buddhism says life is suffering. That’s useful to me.

You’re not going to get out of life without suffering.

That takes me to radical acceptance, that takes me to radical compassion, which allows for me to have a foundation where I can feel what I feel and simultaneously be empowered to be a part of a movement for something different. Otherwise, I am useless.

Billy Porter continues on Page 12

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LGBTQSD.NEWS

Billy Porter continued from Page 11

You’re a success story. And despite your success and the fact that you are an openly Gay leading man and you’ve won major awards and shattered the glass ceiling for Queer Black people, you’re still a Gay Black man in America right now.

I’m Black first. Which I have to remind my own people of, by the by. But keep going. Ask me the question.

What experiences of yours as a Black Gay man might surprise people who look at you and think, ‘He’s famous, he’s good, he doesn’t have anything to worry about’?

We were out on Long Island and we were meeting some friends of ours for a social-distance walk at this place called the Hog Farm. I pulled in with my husband [Adam Smith]. It looked like private property to me. No signs, no real parking lot. There was a farm stand. It looked like a farmer’s market, and there was no one there. And my friends weren’t there and they texted and said they were late. So we sat there for a minute. Then out of nowhere a little white girl comes flouncing out, and she looks around and sees the car, and then she goes back to wherever she came from. I don’t know where it was. I didn’t see any doors. I didn’t know what was going on, but I was immediately filled with anxiety because: Where is she going? Where is this little white girl going? And who is she telling that there’s a Black man sitting out front on our property in a BMW? Never mind my white husband beside me. There’s a Black man. That’s where I live. Every day, all day. That’s before the Gay. So I deal with that, and then I turn around and my own people are just as violent toward me.

So, I’ve never had anywhere to go.

I’ve never really had a place where I have felt comfortable and embraced fully by any community. The racism that exists in the LGBTQ community is at the top of the list. They’re fucking

racists just like everybody else. Inside that community, there’s racism. And inside the Black community, there’s homophobia.

Where are you going now as far as music? What do you listen to get you through the moment and help you recharge?

I’m in the middle of trying to figure out what that is. Music was and still is very healing to me. As I re-enter the mainstream music market, I’m going back to disco, back to house, back to ’70s funk.

Sylvester?

Sylvester. I’m trying to pick up the torch from where he left off when he passed way too soon. Because there’s something healing inside of that energy, inside of that space as a 50-year-old Black man who came out in the ’80s.

We went to the clubs to find fellowship, we went to the clubs to heal collectively, we went to the clubs to party on the weekends so that we could shake the terror and the anxiety and the pain of just having gone to five memorials that week for friends who passed away in their 20s, in a world where nobody cared about you. The government didn’t care about us. [They thought] we deserved to die simply because of who we are. Something about this coronavirus is mirroring it, mirroring that, giving me a lot of anxiety, a lot of PTSD. The last time we spoke, you told me you were working on a contemporary gospel-musical about your experience of surviving the AIDS epidemic.

I am still.

As you work on that while living through another pandemic, what is that experience like for you?

I am just trying to get a handle on the full landscape. This time it’s different. And first of all, the reason why we’re in the position that we’re in in terms of this pandemic is due to whiteness. It’s due to white supremacy. It’s

due to the fact that everybody knew going in that Orangina 45 was not the choice. But whiteness overrode any consequences – that’s not quite the word.

It overrode anything, because, “It’s still Republican, it’s still white, and whatever he’s doing, he’s doing what we want to get done so it’s not so bad. We’ll just deal with him for four years, get all of this shit we want to get done, done: appointing the courts, taking away health care from citizens, rolling back all of the work that we’ve fought for the last 400 years. Let’s just roll all of that back. Because we know we can’t stop it, but we can roll it back enough that it will take another 40 years to get back to where we’ve already gotten, or more.

So let’s just roll everything back.” He represented that to white people.

It was at the expense of anyone who’s not a white straight man in this country.

Right. So he can look at this administration and have the anemic response that he had and allow this country to continue to sink because in the sinking, whatever it was, whatever this bitch does, was never gonna affect him.

Now we’re 50 million unemployed, motherfuckers are in the street, every day 60,000 cases of the virus that could have been contained, and in an economy that’s tanking but we’re still, in our whiteness, talking about books on the news that are written about him by his niece.

In 2014, I asked you if you were the kind of artist you want to be. You said, ‘I’m not sure that there is ever a scenario where I will feel like I have arrived or like I’ve made it.’

Can you answer that more definitively now?

Yeah. I have made it. I’m leaning into that, with as much grace and humility as I can. And I’m trying to use the space that I’ve created for myself to re-enter the music industry in the mainstream on my terms. That’s what I’m working on. And the two singles that I have out right now, which may seem diametrically opposed, are exactly who I am.

‘For What It’s Worth’ was written in 1966, but is obviously still relevant today. What memory do you have of hearing Buffalo Springfield’s version for the first time?

It’s so ubiquitous; I don’t have a memory of the first time. It’s everywhere, it’s always been everywhere.

Any war movie you watch, that’s what they play. It’s just been that for the whole time. So I don’t have a first time, but I do know when my manager suggested it I had to look at it and look at the lyrics and figure out, because I hadn’t really listened to the lyrics: What does this mean to me today? How do we take this song and make sure we’re speaking in the present? And not just as an observer, because it’s a very observational lyric, but how do we ignite the spirit of engagement and change with this song? And so that was the goal for that one. I recorded that the day after the Emmys, before all of this mess was happening. So my goal was to always have this ready for this political season.

The time seems ripe for an entire Billy Porter protest album. Have you considered recording one?

There is no music from Billy Porter without hope and without protest. It all is that. And I’m working on that new album right now. I’m signing a new deal right now. And I have some shit to say. It’ll be protest, it’ll be dance, it’ll be love, it’ll be all of it. Because those are all the things that I am. I no longer have to compartmentalize the wholeness and the fullness of myself anymore. I don’t have to do that anymore.

What advice do you have for Black LGBTQ+ people who are still pushing against an oppressive society that doesn’t allow them to be exactly who they want to be?

Don’t wait for anybody to give you permission to be who you are. Just be it. Just be it and let those motherfuckers catch up. I said, “When you catch up, you’ll figure it out.” But that’s not my journey. Y’all need to catch up.

I’m not the problem. We have to stop thinking that we’re the problem. We’re made to feel like we’re the problem and we need to be fixed. No. Y’all are the problem. If you have a problem with my authenticity, that’s your stuff that I will no longer take on or receive, and I’m going to make sure that I sit in the fullness of myself and give that 100%, no matter where the chips may fall.

And I’m living proof that that actually works out. It’s not fast. It’s not always fast. And I think that’s a lot of the problem: that we have gotten more and more microwavable in the way we live, in our expectations. We live this microwaved life; everything is instantaneous.

It’s like, I’m 50 fucking years old, y’all.

I’ve been doing this since 1985.

Do people realize that you had to put that time in before you became Emmy-winner Billy Porter?

No, they don’t. Because I’m Black and Black don’t crack. It’s all good. But like, no, I’m 50. And as a result of that, I have no more time to give any fucks about what other people think about what I’m doing. I don’t have time. I am middle-aged! Ha! I have to say exactly what I want to say and do exactly what I want to do. Period.

Reflecting on ‘Kinky Boots’ and ‘Pose,’ how do you think those projects changed the conversation when it comes to LGBTQ+ communities of color?

Well, there are Black people in these spaces. When the LGBTQ stories started being told in the mainstream, it was all about white people. Always. I’m still waiting for my guest spot on “Will & Grace.” Still.

Have you auditioned?

Never a call, never a thought. Never anything. I’m not saying this because I’m angry about it or I’m trying to call them out or anything. We write what we know, and what those white people knew was white people and that’s what they wrote about. So now, I’m in a position of power and I’m gonna write about my people. I’m going to do it about myself.

You wrote a TV pilot.

I’ve written several things, but yes, most recently I’ve written a pilot. I’m writing my memoir. It’s in my hands.

I can’t wait for other people to give me permission; I can’t wait for other people in positions of power to validate me. I can’t wait to be invited to the table. I’m at the table. I crashed the party. I’m at the table. Here I am.

That’s how you got to where you are – you kept crashing the table.

I crashed the party. I crashed the dinner party. And I’ma keep doing that.

I think the deadline for the memoir is in October, right?

You really do your research.

What can you share about it with me at this point?

It’s in transition. What’s really interesting is that, because of COVID, because of the lockdown, because of the work that I’ve been doing in lockdown on myself, it’s not a memoir just about recounting my disappointments and my successes. It’s deeper than that. And I’m trying to figure out what that is.

And I’m just trying to allow myself to let it come and not be so Virgo about it, so planned about it. It’s like, yeah, I wrote the proposal; Billy Porter continues on Page 14

LGBTQSD.NEWS

ENTERTIANMENT/PUZZLE

THE FOURTH ANNUAL PRISM AWARDS

SEPTMEBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

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Q Puzzle

ANNOUNCES 2020 FINALIST AND VIRTUAL AWARD CEREMONY FOR SEPTEMBER!

S

aturday and Sunday, September 19th and 20th from 2 - 5pm Pacific time Free and open to the public online RSVP through cartoonart.org/ calendar/2020PrismAwards

SMALL/MIDSIZE PRESS FINALISTS

Prism Comics, Queer Comics Expo and the Cartoon Art Museum are excited to announce that the 2020 Prism Awards will be held virtually as a FREE two-day livestream hosted using Twitch and Discord. Held Saturday and Sunday, September 19th and 20th from 2-5pm, the event will feature panels with the finalists and judges leading up to the awards ceremony!

Details on how to tune in will be released soon. For updates on the September 19 & 20 celebration RSVP through cartoonart.org/ calendar/2020PrismAwards to receive reminders and the information to join. You do not need to RSVP to attend. How to watch will be shared by all three entities, Prism Comics, Queer Comics Expo and the Cartoon Art Museum, through social media and press. RSVP here - https:// guestlist.co/events/660324 The Prism Awards are presented to comic works by queer authors and stories that promote the growing body of diverse, powerful, innovative, positive or challenging representations of LGBTQAI+ characters in fiction or nonfiction comics. The goal of the Awards is to recognize, promote, and celebrate diversity and excellence in the field of queer comics. Finalists and Award Recipients are voted on by diverse panels of comics professionals, educators, librarians, journalists and writers.

Stage Dreams by Melanie Gillman

THE FINALISTS FOR THE 2020 PRISM AWARDS ARE: WEBCOMIC FINALISTS The Girl That Can’t Get A Girlfriend

by Mieri Hiranishi Cafe Suada by Jade Sarson Magical boy by The Kao SHORT FORM FINALISTS In Search Of Absent Pigments by Alex Assan Pseudo Slut Transmission by Emma Jayne One Day Out by Ina Bestari MAINSTREAM PRESS FINALISTS Bloom by Kevin Panetta & Savanna Ganucheau Laura Dean Keeps Breaking Up With Me by Mariko Tamaki & Rosemary Valero-O’Connell Kiss Number #8 by Colleen AF Venable & Ellen T. Crenshaw

Trans Girls Hit The Town by Emma Jayne Lemonade Summer by Gabi Mendez

ANTHOLOGY FINALISTS Come Together edited by Tab Kimpton and Alex Heartwood by Joamette Gil Shout Out edited by Steven Andrews The Prism Awards are organized by the 2020 Awards Committee Chair Gladys Ochoa (Queer Comics Expo) and Prism Awards Co-Founders Ted Abenheim (Prism Comics) andNina Taylor Kester (Queer Comics Expo, Cartoon Art Museum) We were honored to have a diverse panel of 27 judges this year.

Prism Awards are produced by the Cartoon Art Museum and Prism Comics, both 501c3 nonprofit organizations.

ABOUT PRISM COMICS Founded in 2003, Prism Comics is an allvolunteer non-profit organization that supports LGBTQ+ and LGBTQ+ friendly comics, comics professionals and readers. Prism fosters diversity in comics and popular geek culture and is one of the only comics organizations that provides an annual financial grant to emerging comics creators – The Prism Comics Queer Press Grant.

Learn more at prismcomics.org.

ABOUT QUEER COMICS EXPO The Queer Comics Expo (QCE) is an event to celebrate queer culture and promote diverse queer representation in comics, animation and other great ways to tell stories. QCE is also a fundraiser for the Cartoon Art Museum, a 501(c) (3) nonprofit dedicated to preserving, documenting, and exhibiting the unique and accessible art form of cartooning in all its forms for over 30 years.

ABOUT THE CARTOON ART MUSEUM The Cartoon Art Museum’s mission is to ignite imaginations and foster the next generation of visual storytellers by celebrating the history of cartoon art, its role in society, and its universal appeal. The museum’s vision is to be the premier destination to experience cartoon art in all its many forms from around the world, and a leader in providing insight into the process of creating it. The Cartoon Art museum can be visited online at cartoonart.org and at its new location 781 Beach St, San Francisco, CA 94109.

WHEN EVIL RAINS ACROSS 1 Put out 5 Accuse of pedophilia, e.g.

10 Navratilova, for one 14 Glenn, in _Fatal Attraction_ 15 Ricky Martin’s Peter 16 Greek meat container, perhaps 17 Adult filly 18 Beach birds 19 Shakespearean stream 20 With _The_, Netflix series with the phrase “When evil rains” 23 Like Julia Morgan’s models 24 Black Sea port 25 “___ De-Lovely” 26 Got some beds ready 28 Word after “fag” 31 Second name in sci-fi 32 Story of Greeks and Trojans 37 She plays 13-Down 40 Character in 20-Across 41 Home of T. Bankhead 42 Dated 44 Showboat’s “Nobody ___ But Me” 45 What Madonna did to Evita 47 Rinks org.

49 Split one in the locker room 50 Like a sauna 51 Hibernate with the bears 53 She plays 40-Across 58 “Dancing Queen” band 61 Bridge bid, briefly 62 Breakfast spread 63 Where Louganis worked out 64 Shrek and others 65 GI Jane portrayer 66 “The Black Clark Gable” Diggs 67 Monterrey mom 68 James VI, e.g.

DOWN 1 Full sweep 2 You must remember this 3 Cut and paste, e.g.

4 Work out with Richard Simmons 5 Takes part in a bee 6 Cosmetician Norman 7 First name in Pulitzer Prize poetry 8 Part of BART 9 A gangster shoots it off 10 Your gardener’s tool 11 _Days of Our ___ _ 12 Molecule constituents 13 Character in 20-Across 21 Enjoy orally 22 ___ Ababa, Ethiopia 26 Downs of _20/20_ 27 Titanic, for example 28 Loads 29 Dispense carefully 30 Dazzling light 31 Chablis title 33 Fairy tale, so to speak 34 Lesbos, e.g.

35 Grp. or org.

36 Like Easter eggs 38 Desmond of _Sunset Boulevard_ 39 Rec area 43 1979 Bette Midler film 46 Some like it hot 48 One side of a ship 51 Edgar Bergen’s Mortimer 52 Walks like being fagged out 54 _Young Frankenstein _ woman 55 Trump portrayer Baldwin 56 He went down under the sea 57 Cole Porter’s “Let’s ___” 58 Quick on the uptake 59 Drag queen’s favorite snake?

60 Type of toy

Solutions on page 16 QSyndicate.com

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SEPTEMBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

ENTERTAINMENT

LGBTQSD.NEWS

Billy Porter continued from Page 12

but what I’m feeling in my spirit is connected to that but also much deeper and much different than what it originally started out to be. So I’m literally in the space of trying to just let it come.

Is it tough to keep up with what’s happening internally at this moment while working to meet your October deadline, as we move through the Black Lives Matter movement?

[Sarcastically] Oh, it was easier to deal with it until you have brought it up three times today.

That’s fair.

I was actually doin’ all right until the three times you brought it up today.

I’ve triggered you is what you’re saying.

Yes, you have! No, it’s all good. I’m just trying to be compassionate with myself and give myself the space to be wherever I am emotionally – to be wherever I am spiritually, to be wherever I am creatively and move through it, not compartmentalize it, not put the pain away, not ignore it. None of that. Move right directly through all of it. That’s what I’m trying to do.

You recently got some backlash for telling Black people to stop killing Black Trans people. How do you respond to those who have an issue with what you said?

The African American community’s relationship to the LGBTQ community is horrible. It always has been. The Black community is the most homophobic, in my experience, and so the backlash was not a surprise to me. And I was called out by some friends – some really lovely friends – who said in this moment of heightened sensitivity, the specificity of language is very important. I said “Black people.” I didn’t say homophobic Black people. I didn’t say homophobic, transphobic and xenophobic Black people. So I actually recorded an addendum to my message so that I could deal with the semantics of that. Even though y’all know what I’m talking about, I will deal with the semantics of it in this moment.

Please understand: I hear you, I will be more specific on who I’m calling out. I’m calling out homophobic, transphobic and xenophobic Black people who are in the streets killing their own. That’s who I’m calling out. And I meant it. I am comparing it to white supremacy. I am because it is. Everybody has to look in the mirror at themselves. We all have to do it. We all have blind spots. The blind spot in the African American community, one of them, is that. It is. I created a simple do-unto-others metaphor that people had problems with. If you have a problem with it, you need to look at yourself and ask yourself why you have a problem with that.

One of the things my friend told me – because I don’t read comments – was that with all of the pushback, there was pushback to the pushback, [people] saying, “But did he lie?” That was a phrase that I heard that kept coming up in these comments when people were trying to drag me. I’m not lying. Deal with it however you want to. But this is the truth. And I’m a truth-teller.

As editor of Q Syndicate, the LGBTQ wire service, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Cher, Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé.

His work has also appeared in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, GQ and Billboard.

Reach him via Twitter @chrisazzopardi.

COURT NEWS

LGBTQSD.NEWS

A

man who allegedly phoned in death threats to San Diego Pride in 2019 used to work for Pride as a security guard, a judge noted before he sentenced him to prison for bank robberies.

Andre Lafayette Holmes, 32, was sentenced Aug. 17 to 70 months in federal prison for three bank robberies that were only linked to him after he was arrested for threatening Pride employees.

When workers at the Pride office heard Holmes threaten to “shoot up the Pride event,” they called police, who arrested him the next day. Police then searched his home and found a bag of money and disguises that linked Holmes to the bank holdups.

U.S. District Court Judge Larry Burns mentioned the irony that Holmes used to work for Pride before he allegedly threatened workers on July 10, 2019.

Attorney Kathryn Thickstun, who represents Holmes, told the judge Holmes worked security for Pride for several years.

“It struck me as a little bizarre,” said Burns, about the death threats.

Holmes will face a preliminary hearing in San Diego Superior Court in the fall regarding the death threats. He has pleaded not guilty.

Burns ordered him to pay $7,356 in restitution to all three banks he pleaded guilty to robbing in 2016, 2018, and 2019. They include the California Bank & Trust on Fifth Avenue and the Mission Federal Credit Union on Washington St., both in Hillcrest.

“His mental illness

ANDRE HOLMES SENTENCED

FOR BANK ROBBERIES AND 2019 PRIDE THREATS

By Neal Putnam turned into his bank robberies,” said Thickstun, who added that Holmes now has “clarity” after being put on medication after his arrest.

“I’m extremely remorseful for what I did,” said Holmes, wearing a blue mask and a prison uniform.

“I do not want to pass down a legacy of criminality.”

Holmes told Burns he recalled “trying to do the right thing” by attending a rally for Donald Trump in 2016. He also said he needs therapy.

“My plan, while I’m incarcerated, is to better myself,” said Holmes. “I’ll make a determined effort to remain law abiding.”

Holmes said after his release, he hopes to deter teenagers from crime by telling of his experiences.

“I’ll never again rob a bank. I’ll never again do

anything criminal,” said Holmes. “I am extremely ashamed of what I did.”

Police arrested him July 11, 2010 in his 2009 Toyota minivan, and they recovered the cell phone in the minivan from which the calls to Pride were made.

Thickstun urged a 3-year term while Assistant U.S. Attorney Mario Peia asked for a 188-month term.

“I feel for the bank tellers. At the same time… this is what happens when you work for a bank,” said Thickstun.

U.S. District Court Judge Larry Burns noted “these were armed robberies…and violence. I think it was a big deal.”

“No teller is looking to be robbed,” said Peia. “All the victims are too afraid to come here today.”

Peia noted that dur-

ing the holdups, Holmes brought in a Big Gulp cup that was partially filled with water and instructed tellers to put the money in it so it could short circuit any dye tracker.

Peia said Holmes “was quite skillful” in the robberies. Burns added the robberies were “well planned.”

“His violent nature is escalating. While mental illness is certainly there… there’s a need to protect the public,” said Burns.

Holmes was diagnosed as having “schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type” in court documents.

In his first robbery in 2016, the demand note stated: “I’m sorry, good man on hard times, sincerely bank robber.”

Two of Holmes’ relatives and an old friend of his attended the sentencing.

SEPTMEBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

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OPINION

SEPTEMBER 2020 VOLUME 1 ISSUE 24

LGBTQSD.NEWS

Thom Brennaman (photo by Joe Robbins/Getty Images)

CREEP OF THE WEEK: THOM BRENNAMAN

By D’Anne Witkowski

A

s I write this, the first night of the Republican National Convention is a’happening.

I’m not watching because I value my life, but much has been made about the lack of, shall we say, star power in the RNC’s lineup of speakers.

Night one, for example, features Nikki Haley, Donald Trump Jr.’s facial pelt, and a woman who was found screaming outside of the White House about a deep state cabal of lizard pedophiles secretly running the government who is now a trusted advisor to the president.

Night two: Melania Trump, Sen. Rand Paul and a deer that will be killed live on stage by a crossbow-wielding Ted Nugent and then used as a puppet to sing a song about how it’s better to be dead than a Democrat.

Night three: Mike Pence, the MyPillow guy and a closing musical number called, “Thank You for Our Glorious Deaths O’ Great Leader We Would Die for You Again and Again 12 More Years” performed by a 3 Doors Down tribute band with a background choir of the ghosts of the 175,000-plus Americans killed by COVID-19.

You get the idea. TV to die for.

But while Trump is a creep every week, for this column I’d like to focus on sportz-talker man Thom Brennaman, who was suspended mid-game after saying the F-word into a “hot mic.” And by “hot,” I mean “on and in front of his face.”

No, this is not the same F-word used by Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer before her speech at the Democratic National Convention when she said, “It’s Shark Week, m*therf*ckers,” except she didn’t actually say the MFer part out loud because, as she says right afterward, she knows about “hot” mics.

And you would think that Brennaman, being an announcer and all, would, too. But maybe it slipped his mind when, during a Cincinnati Reds game against the Kansas City Royals, he referred to “one of the f-g capitals of the world” live on air as the game came back from a commercial break. I’m not sure where said capital is since he seems to have been put back on air mid-sentence.

As a result, he was suspended by the Reds and Fox Sports has announced that he’s not going to be part of their NFL coverage this season.

Of course, he’s apologized. “I would like to sincerely apologize for the inappropriate comments I made during last night’s telecast,” he said according to The Washington Post. “I made a terrible mistake. To the LGBTQ community, and all people I have hurt or offended, from the bottom of my heart, I am truly sorry. I respectfully ask for your grace and forgiveness.”

This apology is arguably better than the one he made on air: “I made a comment earlier tonight, that I guess went out over the air, that I am deeply ashamed of,” he said. “If I have hurt anyone out there, I can’t tell you how much I say, from the bottom of my heart, I’m so very, very sorry. I pride myself and think of myself as a man of faith.” He then and stopped mid-apology to call a home run before saying, “I don’t know if I’m going to be putting on this headset again.”

Is his apology sincere? I don’t know. But that’s not the point.

On Twitter, someone posted a clip of Brennaman using the slur and someone else responded that Brennaman should be fined or something, but that we shouldn’t jump straight to firing him.

It’s almost quaint in this raging hellscape that is Donald Trump’s America to focus on a sportz man saying the F-word.

But, of course, it isn’t quaint. As many have pointed out, the guy is a professional announcer, which means he’s perfectly comfortable talking like this while at work, likely encouraged, or at least not deterred, by his co-workers.

That means this is not just an isolated oopsie during his decades-long career and no one has jumped straight to firing him.

Homophobia has deep roots. Sometimes those roots creep out of a guy’s mouth and into a microphone for thousands of people to hear.

The true test is what happens afterward and as awful as things are, the fact that this is a potentially career-ending moment rather than just dismissed as “locker room talk” means we’re creeping in the right direction.

D’Anne Witkowski is a poet, writer and comedian living in Michigan with her wife and son. She has been writing about LGBT politics for over a decade. Follow her on Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.

PUZZLE SOLUTION

WHEN EVIL RAINS FROM PAGE 13