Vol. 10, Issue 10, May 10, 2019 by LGBTQ San Diego County News

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Volume 10 Issue 10 May 10-23, 2019

Albert H. Fulcher | Editor

FEATURE

Diversionary’s rockin’ n’ rollin’

w DINING

Creating dialogue through art Thailand’s Isaan region’s best

CALENDAR

Through an emerging, provoking series of paintings, local artist Drew Blair is encouraging discussion about sex in today’s world in his own way, launching a series to promote open and safe communication about sex education with high school students. (Photo by Molly O’Brien)

Local emerging artist aims to bring inclusive sex education to high school students Plan ahead! Check out our local calendar

y ENTERTAINMENT

Throughout art history, any mark, sign, or object resembling the penis, has symbolized power, virility and been used as invocation of an idea, sexuality, and masculinity. Penis art became well known in the ’60s and ’70s through artists like Robert Mapplethorpe, Andy Warhol, Tracey Emin and Louise Bourgeois, all who are a part of a larger group that contributed to its rise. Through an emerging, provoking series of paintings, local artist Drew Blair is encouraging discussion about sex in today’s world in his own way, launching a series to promote open and safe communication about sex education with high school students — something he feels is lacking in today’s society and believes needs a progressive thrust forward. His muse? A penis-shaped dildo. On May 2, Drew Blair partnered with Alexander Salazar Fine Art for a San Diego debut of Blair’s latest project “Equal Sex Ed: Art sExibition,” with all sales

see Drew Blair, pg 16

Stop bullying in sports LGBTs in the News examines negative impact of sports-culture bullying

Albert H. Fulcher | Editor

RuPaul’s Drag Race comes to San Diego

Index Opinion ................................... 6 Classifieds............................ 13 Calendar ............................... 14 Puzzle ................................... 14

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LGBTs in the News with Thom Senzee once again approached a necessary conversation on discrimination and bullying in sports at the Gossip Grill on April 25. With an all-star panel, discussion ranged from transgender persons in sports, locker room talk, stereotypes, and what things that can be done to change the normalized culture in both major league, minor league and high school sports. Panelists for this discussion

see Bullying, pg 4

(l to r) San Diegan Sam Moehlig, gymnast and youth trans activist; Maya Reddy, pro golfer, ambassador for Athlete Ally, founder of The Gaysian Project; Brock McGillis, former Ontario Hockey League and professional hockey player; Matt Savant, president of Business Operations for the San Diego Gulls and Thom Senzee, LGBTs in the News founder (Photo by Albert H. Fulcher)

Applications for 2019 Gay Pride ambassadors now in progress

(www.canstockphoto.com)

Albert H. Fulcher | Editor Since the 1970s, the Imperial Court de San Diego has selected San Diego’s Pride ambassadors, started by Nicole Murray Ramirez, Queen Mother of the Americas of the Imperial Court. In its early beginnings, Mr and Miss Gay Pride consisted of a male and a drag queen. It later added Ms. Gay Pride to include the lesbian community. This year, the court is announcing MX Gay Pride to include gender-nonconforming persons. Applications for all titles opened on May 1 and will continue to accept candidates through the end of May. The 46th Imperial Court’s Princess Royale Jessica D’Nalga and Prince Royale Steven Blocker are at the helm of bringing the new titleholder to this long-standing tradition of selecting people to represent San Diego Pride. D’Nalga said that the newest title, MX, is being added to allow a more inclusive representation with San Diego Pride titleholders. “We have our gay people, our lesbians, trans people, but then we also have [a] nonconforming, non-binary aspect that makes the LGBTQ community,” D’Nalga said. “A lot of other cities have begun doing this as well. We took it to the board, presented it with the reasons why. We want to be able to

see Gay Pride, pg 12

GAY SAN DIEGO May 10-23, 2019

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FEATURE

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Bringing out your inner rock star Diversionary Theatre’s Rock n’ Roll Rebellion Ball honorees talk empowerment in today’s world climate Albert H. Fulcher | Editor Representing their inner rock stars, attendees at Diversionary Theatre’s Rock n’ Roll Rebellion Ball rocked the red carpet and the evening with a massive celebration of the country’s third-oldest LGBT committed theater. On April 26, at the US Grant Hotel, the gala filled the room with impressive speeches, amazing performances and provided several ways to serve Diversionary’s programs through donations. This year’s gala was more than just a fun time though: With a theme flaunting the right to be your authentic self, the program went much deeper with empowering speeches and honoring those that make a difference in the community, theater and beyond. Matt Morrow, Diversionary Theatre executive artistic director, said that the staff at Diversionary is small but mighty and was thankful for the many volunteers that make the theater a success. “We need to remind ourselves of our inner rock gods right now,” Morrow said. “Every morning, you turn on the daily news with trepidation and terror. The culture war has reunited with fury. It is vital that we find our core of strength and our veracity to face down, once again, what is trying to tear our community apart.” Morrow said that so much is happening at Diversionary now that it was hard to know where to start. Diversionary’s 20th anniversary run of "Hedwig and The Angry Inch" announced another extension. The show has already broke all records in Diversionary’s history. “This story about a gender queer outsider shines more

powerfully in our intimate production,” Morrow said. “And their story certainly renewed the fight in my heart for another 20 years.” Morrow said Diversionary’s Arts Evolution program has served everyone from elementary students to senior citizens and has “absolutely blossomed” all over San Diego. Additionally, this year, a record six programs, in partnership with the San Diego Unified School District, will tour an LGBT-themed show in the public school system. “In this wild, uncertain time, one thing is certain,” Morrow said. “Diversionary's not only finding growth, we will not be intimidated by the bullies fighting the cultural war. Our voices, as swords, will be heard. And by the way, if you mess with our trans and gender-nonconforming community, you mess with all of us. Look around the room tonight. This is what community looks like. This is what family looks like. And this is certainly what fearlessness looks like.” The Fritz Klein Award is presented to individuals in the community who demonstrate fearlessness, pioneering leadership and vision. Dr. Klein, a passionate Diversionary supporter and LGBT advocate was known to say, “I’ll work if you work.” His namesake award honors his contributions to the community and the hard work he embodied throughout life, which serves as an inspiration to all to continue. Receiving the Fritz Klein Award, honorees Dea and Osborn Hurston are longtime advocates, leaders and philanthropists for the arts in San Diego. With their commitment and involvement in all venues

BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT Epic on 5th offers 25 homes one block from Balboa Park Sales Grand Opening of Next Space Development’s latest residential community on May 11 Epic on 5th is a collection of 25 single-level residences, two homes are live/work residences with direct street access, and one unique home is an extraordinary penthouse. These designer residences have been newly remodeled with interior finishes selected by award-winning Design Line Interiors. Homeowners will be able to enjoy the boutique hotel-style lobby when greeting guests. The Outdoor Kitchen + Lounge was envisioned by David McCullough of McCullough Landscape Architecture, Inc. This relaxing courtyard is complete with BBQs, a dining deck with heat lamps, plenty of seating for a large party, fireplaces, and shaded areas. Epic on 5th’s location is ideal, right in between Hillcrest and Bankers Hill. San Diego’s Uptown neighborhood is a vibrant and diverse community offering world renowned museums, celebrated restaurants, and is just steps from Balboa Park which offers 65 miles of trails. In Uptown and the surrounding areas, there is exceptional dining, the Hillcrest farmers market, independent theaters, small music halls and jazz clubs, galleries, gourmet markets, craft fairs, maker spaces, and many other spots that are off the beaten path. The floor plans range from 1,166 to 2,858 square feet. The residences offer up single-level living with decks providing a variety of bay views, city views and park views. All of the homes on the fifth floor offer vaulted ceiling and loft spaces. The plan types range from two to three bedrooms, and up to three-and-a-half baths. Each residence has two secured parking spaces. The San Diego-based Next Space Development Realty Inc. was founded in 2014 by Rudy Medina and Richard Simis. The company specializes in coastal infill residential and mixed-use development projects throughout San Diego County. Utilizing a combined 60 years of owning, developing, and managing properties, Next Space has completed approximately $1 billion of in-house and third-party development projects. The public Sales Grand Opening is May 11 at 10 a.m. These residences are priced from the $700,000s. For more information, please go to www. Epicon5th.com or call 619-494-5681. Epic on 5th is located at 3275 Fifth Ave., San Diego, CA 92103. Sales by CADO Real Estate Group DRE #01525182.

of art in San Diego, they’ve contributed countless hours of time, talent, and money — making them a driving force that has helped shape the San Diego arts landscape. Osborn Hurston reminded everyone that Diversionary just turned 36 and is the third-oldest LGBT theater in the country. “Diversionary Theatre is one of San Diego's best theaters. Period, end of discussion,” Osborn Hurston said. “The word ‘diversionary’ means to

Actress, singer, author, teacher and activist Alexandra Billings earned the Fritz Klein National Award at Diversionary Theatre’s “Rock n’ Roll Rebellion Ball” at the US Grant Hotel on April 26. (Photo by Albert H. Fulcher)

draw attention away from the principal concern and when I think about Diversionary, I think the opposite. I think Diversionary draws attention to the idea that people, irrespective of their race, color or

sexual orientation, both make up and contribute to the rich and diverse community that we all enjoy here.” Dea Osborn said she always had an adamant pride for diversity and although San Diego has a very diverse community, she claimed that it is not a very inclusive community, and that is where work still needs to be done. “When I met Matt, and we had lunch, I know that he was not expecting a straight black woman to talk to him about being inclusive in his community,” Dea Osborn said. “I want to thank him so much for listening. Because I think that since Matt has been here, Diversionary has been much more inclusive.”

see Rock n’ Roll, pg 9

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NEWS

gay-sd.com FROM PAGE 1

BULLYING

JOE'S CLIENT SUCCESS STORY

included San Diegan Sam Moehlig, gymnast and youth trans activist; Brock McGillis, former Ontario Hockey League and professional hockey player; Maya Reddy, pro golfer, ambassador for Athlete Ally, founder of The Gaysian Project; and a surprise return of Matt Savant, president of Business Operations for the San Diego Gulls. Senzee, founder of LGBTs in the News, moderated “Spectator of Star Player: We Can All Help End Bullying in Sports,” engaged panelists with some opening questions, and then took questions from the audience both on site and online. Sam Moehlig is a gymnast who has always loved extreme sports and pushing his body strength. In gymnastics, his favorite is the still rings and anything that has him up in the air. He said that, while growing up in gymnastics, the perception of the sport in general is connected with femininity. “My sport is not taken very seriously. For example, there are only 10 schools left in the United States that have men's gymnastics programs,” Moehlig said. “They are being shut down because so many male gymnasts are too afraid to go into it as a high school or college student in fear of being called gay or being seen as females.” Moehlig pointed out that trans women in sports are

seen on their physical ability, whereas trans males are more focused on by their identity. “For the girls, I wouldn't say they have somewhat of an advantage, but I still say, they are a girl,” Moehlig said. “If you are a girl, you should be on a girl’s team, if you are a boy, you should be on a boy’s team.” Moehlig said that he was home-schooled, which probably had an effect on the amount of bullying that he was subjected to, but he said on a team, the negative culture is still there and needs to be addressed. “I feel like my teammates are the ones that should have my back and are defending me against the people that are bullying me,” Moehlig said. “And when people are teasing me, they should be the ones defending me. I need you and if you are not there, how are we going to be teammates and how am I going to be able to trust you?” Brock McGillis is the world's first professional hockey player to come out and the only male in hockey to ever come out publicly. In response to Moehlig and his family feeling that he was better off being homeschooled, McGillis said that it is a shame that a trans person should ever feel uncomfortable going to a public school. He also believes that a lot of the culture that prevents trans athletes from attending schools is perpetuated in the locker rooms of sports. “In male team sport culture. I think you can tease each other,” McGillis said. “Like

see Bullying, pg 7

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COMMUNITY VOICES

GAY SAN DIEGO May 10-23, 2019

How to lower your relationship drama Life Beyond Therapy Michael Kimmel

n my work as a psychotherapist, I see it over and over again: A perfectly happy single person meets someone wonderful, they start to date, things get serious and — boom! — hello relationship drama! Over the past 20 years, how many times have I heard a client say, “I thought I’d worked out my personal problems, but, now there’s all this drama and conflict since I met (name of new partner). What do I do?” Oh yes, dear readers, being in a relationship brings up stuff that you thought you’d “worked through.” Surprise! You haven’t. Or, to be more accurate, you worked through a lot of it. But, now, with a new partner, it’s obvious that there’s more that you haven’t addressed. And only a new relationship will bring it all up. What to do? Fear not! Because this too is workable. I address it specifically in my book, “The Gay Man’s Guide to Open and Monogamous Marriage” (now available in paperback) and you don’t need to be a gay man or in a marriage to find this advice useful. Any relationship is going to bring up some drama, it’s inevitable, even if you’re dating the Dalai Lama (but, is he single?). Here’s a definition of drama that I like: “An exciting, emotional, or unexpected series of events or circumstances.” When unexpected joy, love or affection comes our way, we usually feel pretty good about it. So, all drama isn’t bad. However, the drama we don’t want: 1) is negative; 2) loves conflict; and 3) feeds on jealousy, envy and resentment. How can we minimize this “bad drama” and replace it with peace and happiness? Consider these ideas from my book

(Chapter 2: Competition and Conflict) to reduce the drama in your relationship(s): • Don’t judge yourself or your partner for creating drama. It won’t help. We’re all doing the best we can until we become more stable and secure. Try to understand what’s going on with your partner instead of judging them: they may have something worth considering. • Get good at recognizing “The Drama Sequence”: 1) something happens; 2) your mind starts to feed on it; 3) you build a story in your head; 4) your emotions get all jacked up; and 5) you act out/react badly. • What is your motivation for creating drama? You won’t do anything repeatedly unless there’s something in it for you, so, what’s the payoff? Are you looking for attention or excitement? If so, can you get it more directly? If you’re bored, what new adventures can you create with your partner? • Don’t take things so personally. Try this mantra. “It’s not about me. It’s not about me.” This will minimize your tendency to over-react and instead, you can respond more calmly to what your partner’s saying. • Get out of your head and into your heart. In an emotional situation with your partner, don’t just vent. Instead, try reflective listening: “It sounds like you’re really upset about this. Let’s talk about it.” A little empathy goes a long way. • A lot of drama in a relationship comes from anger and poor communication. Speak your truth to your partner as respectfully and kindly as you can. It’s not easy, but it can save you both a lot of heartache in the long run. • If it’s your partner who’s emotionally jacked up, you can aim for a “neutral” state so their drama doesn’t trigger yours. Breathe calmly and tell yourself, “I am safe.” Diffuse their drama by staying centered yourself.

Since every relationship has drama, why not learn how to work with it? The better you get at calming yourself (and your partner), the less drama you’re likely to experience. Two relatively calm people can talk through even the most difficult experiences without a lot of upset and hurt feelings. If you’d like more tools for reducing drama in your relationship(s), go to my website (https://www.lifebeyondtherapy. com/mybook/) and check out my book (finally, it’s available in paperback). For a limited time, the paperback edition is priced at $14 if you order it through the website (it’s $20 if you order through Amazon).

(www.canstockphoto.com)

—Michael Kimmel is a licensed psychotherapist who specializes in helping LGBT clients achieve their goals and deal with anxiety, depression, grief, sexually addictive behavior, coming out, relationship

challenges and homophobia. Contact him at 619-955-3311 or visit lifebeyondtherapy.com. (Graphic by www.CanStockPhoto.com)t

OPINION

GAY SAN DIEGO May 10-23, 2019

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Guest Editorial

The Older Americans Act is up for reauthorization By Paul Downey President & CEO, Serving Seniors The U.S. senior population continues to grow as baby boomers, the largest generation behind millennials, reach older age. There are 40 million Americans over the age of 65, and according to a 2017 U.S. Census Bureau report, it’s estimated that by 2035, there will be 78 million people age 65 and older. Factors like health issues, lowered income and rising costs of living in our region can affect a senior’s ability to make ends meet. Serving Seniors believes that hot meals and healthy food should be accessible to all. In San Diego County, more than 1 million meals — served in senior centers and delivered to the homebound — are provided. Serving Seniors is responsible for 65% of that total, and a hot meal is the most common request from

those asking for our assistance. A piece of legislation helps fund programs for seniors nationwide, and it is soon coming to a vote to reauthorize the program for future years. The Older Americans Act (OAA) provides older adults with vital programs and services as well as needed respite to their family caregivers. The aim of OAA’s programs is to help seniors stay as independent as possible in their homes and communities, as well as prevent hospitalization or home care through well-being initiatives. As a response to Congressional concerns about the lack of community social services for senior citizens, President Lyndon Johnson signed the OAA into law on July 14, 1965. In 2016, Congress voted with unanimous bipartisan support to reauthorize the act in its entirety, effective through fiscal year 2019. OAA funding is

EDITOR Albert H. Fulcher (619) 961-1960 albert@sdcnn.om

SALES & MARKETING DIRECTOR Mike Rosensteel (619) 961-1958 mike@sdcnn.com

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Paul Downey Michael Kimmel Nicole Murray Ramirez Frank Sabatini Jr.

MARKETING MANAGER Francisco Tamayo (619) 272-1279

CONTRIBUTOR www.canstockphoto.com WEB AND SOCIAL MEDIA Albert Fulcher albert@sdcnn.com COPY EDITOR Dustin Lothspeich

ACCOUNTING Priscilla Umel-Martinez (619) 961-1962 accounting@sdcnn.com

distributed to 56 state agencies, over 200 tribal organizations, two native Hawaiian organizations, more than 600 agencies on aging and 20,000 local-level service providers. While the core service provided by the OAA is senior nutrition, the OAA also funds other critical programs for seniors like Adult Protective Services, National Eldercare Locator Service, job training and creation for seniors, health promotion and disease prevention activities for seniors, and programs that protect vulnerable seniors such as the Long-term Care Ombudsman Program. Now up for reauthorization again, new provisions within the OAA aim to: • Improve some core programs of the OAA, including home-delivered meals, assistance for family caregivers, transportation for seniors and more, all with the intention of improving economic security

for seniors. • Increase protection against elder abuse, primarily through programs to create economically accessible long-term care services and strengthen ombudsman services that monitor such programs. • Promote healthy living by offering programs on fall prevention, chronic disease management and more, ultimately improving the quality of life for seniors and lessening their medical costs. The reauthorization of the OAA is supported by many national organizations committed to the wellbeing of seniors, such as the National Council on Aging, National Association of Nutrition and Aging Services Programs, the National Committee to Preserve Social Security & Medicare, the National Association of Social Workers, and more. San Diego residents can voice their support for the OAA

OPINIONS/LETTERS: Gay San Diego encourages letters to the editor and guest editorials. Please email either to albert@sdcnn.com and include your phone number and address for verification. We reserve the right to edit letters for brevity and accuracy. Letters and guest editorials do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher or staff. SUBMISSIONS/NEWS TIPS Press releases and story ideas are welcomed. Send press releases, tips, photos or story ideas to editor@sdcnn.com. For breaking news and investigative story ideas contact the editor by phone or email. Copyright © 2019 San Diego Community News Network

to their representatives on the House Education & Workforce Committee, which oversees the reauthorization of the legislation. Through www.usa.gov/ elected-officials, you can find contact information for your elected officials and encourage them to vote for the reauthorization of the OAA. Serving Seniors is committed to providing impactful programs and services to older adults living in poverty, and the Older Americans Act aligns with our mission. We encourage you to voice your support on behalf of our elderly neighbors and citizens. —For more than two decades, Paul Downey has been a national advocate for low-income seniors. He is president and CEO of Serving Seniors, a nonprofit agency dedicated for nearly 50 years to increasing the quality of life for San Diego seniors living in poverty.t

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NEWS

gay-sd.com FROM PAGE 4

BULLYING in ‘RuPaul's Drag Race,’ the reading [publicly pointing out a flaw in someone else] challenge is popular. In hockey, we call it chirping. But, I don't want to hear anything racist, sexist, homophobic or transphobic. Those things are off limits.” McGillis said that there has always been a code in hockey that you never talk about a person's family. “If that is off limits, then it should be off limits to chirp about someone's sexuality or feminizing them as a way to put them down,” McGillis continued. “We are all equal. There are strong men and weak men. There are strong women and weak women. It is irrelevant. This is 1960s stuff. This is pre-Stonewall stuff. That's not boys being boys, that's people being jerks. You can have banter with your friends without being a jerk. You can do that in sports, you can do that in school, you can do that at work and other places. We just have to do a better job at educating people what is OK and what isn't. They need to know why it hurts them and how it hurts them.” Ladies Professional Golf Association (LGPA) Symetra Tour golfer Maya Reddy said that when it comes to locker room talk and teasing, good humor comes from being respectful to another person. “I feel like it is really easy [refraining from negative locker room talk], but don't be

(www.canstockphoto.com)

a shitty person,” Reddy said. “It's the lazy route to just make fun of somebody. You can still be funny and have fun with your friends and make jokes that come from a state of lovingness, being kind and being respectful. That's what needs to change. Locker room talk shouldn't be a crutch for people that are assholes to excuse their behavior.” McGillis said in female sports, a lot of them are presumed to be lesbians until proven straight. “And then they hyper-feminize themselves to the point to the extreme to say, ‘Hey, I'm a woman,’” McGillis said. “I'll see a female hockey game and the females are wearing mascara on the ice. They intentionally have long hair, wear mascara so that they are not automatically presumed to be lesbian.” San Diego Gulls’ Matt Savant grew up playing hockey and said Brock’s statements were “dead on.” “I played hockey as a kid, all three of my sons play hockey and my son, I'm coaching his team,” Savant said. “I hear 10-, 11-, and 12-year-old boys using really negative language, like ‘You play like a girl, you shoot like a girl,’ and that's a

GAY SAN DIEGO May 10-23, 2019

negative connotation. This is something that needs to be addressed, and in my opinion, not any of the major sports are taking a real strong approach to addressing it.” Savant said it really boils down to respect. “Not everyone acts the same, looks the same and having open communication is the beginning of the conversation to these problems we face in sports,” Savant said. “When people are talking or joking with me, there is an element of truth in everything that you say. Having open communication and accepting people and their differences and their ability to perform at a different level doesn't mean that they are a lesser person.” McGillis grew up in the hockey world, moving away from home at the age of 15 and called that young culture a “bubble” because he was constantly with his teammates five to seven days a week; they were his friends, and in many ways his family. “That world was somewhat, and still can be, homophobic,” McGillis said. “Not necessarily because people hate the LGBTQ+ community, but in the sense of the language that they use. Because of that, I felt very uncomfortable, I felt afraid that I couldn't be myself and still be a hockey player.” McGillis said not coming out had to do a lot with the hypermasculinity of the sport. “It's a very tough, rugged sport and you are expected to adhere to that. Because

see Bullying, pg 12 in partnership with

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The District 3 City Council race

with the top two facing off at Abrams, Larry Baza, Ebony the November general election. Burnett Mullins, Bob Lehman, Stephen Whitburn, Toni Duran Elaine Graybill, Gil Cabrera, and Chris Olson have the Rev. Dan Koeshall, BigMike most support and most solid Phillips, Eddie Reynoso, Ryan campaigns. Bedrosian, Sherman Mendoza, here are now four openly Whitburn probably has the Nick Moede, Jeff Jackson, Joe LGBT candidates for the best name identification havLetzkus and many others. District 3 City Council ing been the Democratic canWhitburn has worked at the seat being vacated by current didate to run against former American Red Cross and now City Council member Chris Republican County Supervisor is with the American Cancer Ward. Ward is currently on Ron Roberts. Whitburn won Society. Many of us were glad his way to being elected to every precinct in the 3rd disto hear that San Diego Pride the state Assembly seat being trict. Whitburn has a very did the right thing and settled vacated by Assembly member impressive list of endorsements: with Whitburn, who was one Todd Gloria, who is the clear State Assembly member Lorena of Pride's most popular execufront runner to be our next Gonzalez; former state Senators tive directors and wrongfully mayor. In my opinion, there Dede Alpert and Marty Block; dismissed by an incompetent are three candidates who are former City Council members and out-of-touch board of direcfront runners to come out of the John Hartley and Donna Fry; tors whose then-members are TOU ChoiceControl Community News_RUN: x 10.96 March 2020 primary election,Phase3__SD and community leaders Bruce05_01_19__TRIM: thankfully 6.1 gone. Most political

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IT’S TIME TO TAKE CONTROL.

(l to r) San Diego City Council District 3 candidates Chris Olson, Toni Duran And Stephen Whitburn (Courtesy photo)

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4/17/19 2:33 PM

pundits feel Whitburn will definitely make the run-off and the question is who he will be running against. Most people believe that Toni Duran will be that person. Duran works for popular state Senator Toni Atkins, who has endorsed her — even though the last candidate Atkins endorsed was Craig Roberts, who lost the Democratic Party chairmanship to Will Rodriguez Kennedy. Duran is indeed a popular personality having won “Woman of the Year” twice at the annual Nicky Awards. She has also been endorsed by former Senator Chris Kehoe and Congressmember Scott Peters. If Duran gets elected, she would be the third lesbian to be on the current City Council. About a year ago, I asked Duran if she would want to run for City Council and she told me absolutely not. When I asked her what changed her mind, she said that many community people asked her to run. Duran's recent campaign kickoff drew a good crowd and I believe Atkins’ endorsement, and being the sole woman running against three gay men, will play a big factor in this race. The dark horse in this race is Chris Olson and he is a very strong long shot that other candidates better keep their eyes on. For five years, Olson has been the very smart policy analyst for the city’s Office of the Independent Budget Analyst and thus, a very qualified candidate. He hired one of San Diego's top political consultants, the one-and-only Tom Shepard, who has advised countless winning candidates. Another thing going for Olson is that he is a really nice guy. The big problem for Olson is that he is not well known in the LGBT community but is doing his best to make up for it. He

was happily married and devoted to his husband who sadly died of a heart attack not long ago. Now Olson wants to serve the citizens of District 3. By the way, I love his yard signs best of all the candidates — hot pink. Harvey Milk Diversity Breakfast In the tradition of the annual Martin Luther King All People's Breakfast and the Cesar Chavez Breakfast, 11 years ago I founded the Harvey Milk Diversity Breakfast with San Francisco, Palm Springs, Florida, etc. following San Diego and establishing breakfasts and dinners celebrating Harvey's birthday. Eleven years ago, I approached Dr. Delores Jacobs and State Commissioner Robert Gleason of the LGBT Center and the rest is history, as now over 1,000 people attend, and it’s always sold out so get your tickets today. It’s Friday, May 17, at 7 a.m. —Nicole Murray Ramirez has been writing a column since 1973. He has been a Latino/ gay activist for almost half a century and has advised and served the last seven mayors of San Diego. Named the ‘Honorary Mayor of Hillcrest’ by a city proclamation, he has received many media awards including from the prestigious San Diego Press Club. Reach Nicole at Nicolemrsd1@gmail. com and follow him on Twitter @Nmrsd2. Editor’s Note: The opinions written in this column are the author’s own and do not necessarily represent the opinions of the staff and/or publisher of Gay San Diego and/or its parent company, San Diego Community News Network (SDCNN). The newspaper and its staff should be held harmless of liability or damages.t

FEATURE

gay-sd.com FROM PAGE 3

ROCK N’ ROLL Dea Osborn said she met her first lesbian in 1967. From a very small town, until that time, all Girl Scout troops had been segregated. There was a black troop, a white troop, a Jewish troop and a Catholic troop. In 1967, they became one troop. “We know that there were black, white and Christian Girl Scouts, but we didn't know there were lesbians,” she said. “A girl came up to me and said, 'Hi, I'm Connie and I'm a lesbian.' I said, 'Hi, I'm Dea and I'm a Democrat.' I didn't know what a lesbian was. Connie gave me a good education.” She said her friend Connie was out when no one was. Because of her small town, there were no gay people. There were sweet men and banished women. Connie being out was a great distress to her parents. “What happened to her is that her parents deemed her incorrigible,” Dea Osborn said. “They sent her to a receiving hospital where she was given electric shock treatments. And after the third treatment, the doctor looked at her and said, 'You no longer like girls.' That was 52 years ago and thanks to me receiving this award, [until now] I had not talked to Connie in 52 years. I was able to find her over Facebook.” After all the years, Dea Osborn said those were difficult times for her, but that there is a happy ending to this story..

“The electric shock treatments didn't work, and she's been married to the same woman for 35 years,” she said. “But there still is a need for our youths so please donate to the important services that Diversionary extends to these communities. There still is a need. It is not electric shock treatments, but it is still mind control and we all know that. So we still have a fight out there.” Actress, singer, author, teacher and activist Alexandra Billings earned the Fritz Klein National Award. Although growing up was not easy for her, Billings has starred on Broadway, is currently playing Davina on Amazon’s Emmy and Golden Globe-winning show “Transparent.” Her roles include transgender and non-transgender characters and her involvement in LGBT rights has taken her across the country, earning many awards and recognition for her LGBT activism and her career. Staying true to form, Billings had some funny, poignant and compelling words for those attending the gala. “This is the most fabulous gay event I have been to. This is gayer than Elton John singing 'Rose's Turn' in Cher's bedroom,” Billings said. “I'm 57 years old, I'm a mixed-race gender female, I've been living with AIDS for 30 years. I'm a former heroin addict, pill-popping alcoholic and I also survived living on the streets of Chicago at a time when I had no home and I made my money

GAY SAN DIEGO May 10-23, 2019

and my livelihood as a sex worker.” She said now she is on an award-winning show and also a professor at University of California, considering herself blessed and very, very grateful. “I believe that all of us have a divine path,” Billings said. “We also have a mission and a responsibility. I believe that all of us come equipped with compassion, empathy and intelligence and the weight of our own history. But if you are sitting around waiting for others to make change, my friend, you are wasting your gift. That is not only a crime, it is a damn shame. There are hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of humans waiting, literally waiting for you to speak — to say something that is true, that is devout and that reverberates.” Billings said that President Donald Trump does not frighten her and that she believes that he doesn't hate the LGBT community. “He has no idea who we are,” Billings continued. “I know it feels like he hates us. Ronald Reagan hated us. Let's be clear who our enemies are. I lived through that. And I buried every friend I had when I was in my 20s. Donald Trump is not a cruel human being. Donald Trump is a misguided buffoon who has happened to get extremely lucky for a couple of minutes and has surrounded himself with human beings that believe his rhetoric.” She said those people don't scare her either because they don't know her. Billings said

what frightens her the most are the people that voted Trump into office. “You know those people,” Billings said. “You work with them, you shop with them, you teach them, they babysit your children, they walk your dogs, they check you out at the grocery store, they sell you clothing. And let me tell you something else that they are doing. They teach your children. Those are the people that scare me because they know what they are doing. They have infiltrated our community.” Billings said, as a community, we’ve got to be clever. Not about what we are, but about what we do. “Your theater is a miracle. It is a drop of water in a desert,” she continued. “This is a war. This is a battle. This isn't about taking sides because all of us are all humans. All of us. It's so easy for us all to sit in our fabulous outfits in this room because we all agree with each other. But it really doesn't do anything, does it? It doesn't really change much, does it? And we are certainly not talking to the people that voted these people into office [and] who want to take away my right to teach.” Billings said that we have to talk to those people who disagree with us the most. We have to find those people that despise us, hate who we are, that think that we are an abomination of God, that believe that we are ruining this country, and believe that we are anti-American and unpatriotic.

“Those are the people that we have to get to sit down, invite into our homes, break bread with and speak to,” Billings said. “Because if we don't, we are going to be stuck in this room forever. The way you all reach out to the youth is extraordinary and now we have to do something more. We have to reach out to their parents, and their grandparents because those are the people that are under the misguided notion that what they've been taught, not what they believe, is true. It's not. But they don't know that. And they are not going to know that until they know you.” Billings said to take all of our fabulousness and bring it out into the center of the universe. “You can still be fantastic and talk to each other, just do it out there,” she said. “Twentyfive steps to the elevator. That is how close we are to freedom. Ignorance is not hatred. Ignorance is a lack of education. We have to tell people who we are, and we have to show them that we are Americans and that we are humanists. Whether you are a Republican, liberal, Democrat, conservative or Independent, whatever container you decide to put your political ideals in, all of us fit in the arms of God. Our divine sense is inbred. We are a part of something so much greater than anyone could possibly imagine. This is everybody's job.” —Albert Fulcher can be reached at albert@sdcnn.com.t

events @THECENTER Friday, May 17

BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT

Urban Optiks most anticipated event of the year returns Urban Optiks Optometry, San Diego’s premier source of luxury eyewear and unparalleled eye care, presents its fifth annual Raise Your Glasses Mega Vendor Trunk Show. This year’s event returns to Urban Optiks’ own backyard at the Cairo Building on Saturday, May 18, from noon-4 p.m. Raise Your Glasses provides a truly unique opportunity for attendees to see the entire frame collections from each of our vendors. Trunk shows are usually held with one specific vendor in a single optometric practice. However, we take this experience to the next level by producing a mega shopping experience, which brings a multitude of vendors together from all over the world — all in one place. There will be thousands of frames to view, try on and purchase. Don’t miss the eye-popping fun and fab frames! This year’s participating vendors include: Anne et Valentine (Paris); Booth & Bruce (England); Cinematiq (Budapest); Claire Goldsmith (London); Face a Face (Paris); Gold & Wood (Paris); Kaenon Polarized (USA); l.a.Eyeworks (USA); Matsuda (Japan); Oliver Goldsmith (London); Tom Davies (London); Traction Productions (Paris); Vinylize (Budapest).

Saturday, June 22

11th Annual Harvey Milk Diversity Breakfast

12th Annual Pachanga de Frida 6-10 pm, The Center

7:30 am, Hilton San Diego Bayfront The Harvey Milk Diversity Breakfast is designed to bring together more than 1,000 diverse San Diegans – business, labor, Democrats, Republicans, all communities, all ages, all San Diegans who support equality and justice – to celebrate the memory of this influential civil rights activist. Proceeds benefit the social services programs of the San Diego LGBT Community Center. Visit us at events. thecentersd.org/HMDB for tickets and more info.

Saturday, May 18

Project TRANS at The Center Welcomes Monica Helms! 5 pm, The Center Join us at The Center as we welcome transgender activist and creator of the transgender flag, Monica Helms, to San Diego! She will be reading excerpts from her book “More Than Just A Flag”, signing books and transgender flags, and take questions from those in attendance. For more information and accessibility requests please contact, trans@thecentersd.org. A 72 hour advance notice for ASL interpreters is greatly appreciated. Learn more on our Facebook page.

www.thecentersd.org The San Diego LGBT Community Center 3909 Centre Street • 619-692-2077 Twitter: @LGBTCenter

facebook.com/At.The.Center

Each year we celebrate the birthday of Frida Kahlo, commemorating the legendary life of one of the most influential Mexican painters of the mid-twentieth century. Attendees will enjoy live music, art exhibits by local Latin@ artists, a Frida look-alike contest, great food and tequila! Proceeds from this event benefit The Nicole Murray-Ramirez Latino Services @ The Center. Ticket information coming soon! For more information contact Ricardo at latinos@thecentersd.org or 619.692.2077 x116. For sponsorship opportunities contact Megan at events@thecentersd.org or 619.692.2077 x255.

Saturday, June 29

8th Annual YPC Academy Graduation Brunch

11 am, The Prado at Balboa Park The YPC Academy Graduation Brunch celebrates the accomplishments and future endeavors of the Young Professionals Council Academy. We invite you to join the 2019 Graduating class and members of the Young Professionals Council as we toast to their accomplishments. Single admission tickets are $65 and include a buffet brunch. Sponsorship levels are available: www.thecentersd.org/ypcbrunch. This event is wheelchair accessible and ASL interpretation will be provided. For more information contact ypc@thecentersd.org.

DINING

GAY SAN DIEGO May 10-23, 2019

To those heading up to Del Mar later this month for the annual San Diego County Fair (May 31 through July 4), prepare for a barrage of sinful foods that are new to the vast lineup. Themed this year after L. Frank Baum’s classic tale, “The Wonderful Wizard of Oz,” fair-goers will encounter everything from “yellow brick” smoothies and “ruby red” lemonade to “flying monkey” caramel corn and “scarecrow” hot dogs. Among the more outrageous items are Hot Cheetos baked potatoes; fried bacon-wrapped plantains; “blizzard of Oz” frozen hot chocolate; and

Look for this swooped-up cinnamon roll and other zany foods at the upcoming San Diego County Fair. (Courtesy photo)

“OzSome crunch” cinnamon rolls studded with Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal. In all, more than 120 food and beverage vendors will blanket the grounds, including some offering healthy choices such as fruit bowls, salads, wraps and gluten-free items. 2260 Jimmy Durante Blvd., 858-755-1161, sdfair.com.

A bevy of cheese makers from the U.S. and Europe will take part in Liquid City’s inaugural Cheese Expo 2019, to be held from 1:30 to 6 p.m., May 19, at BRICK in Liberty Station. Organized by Rob Graff of Venissimo and Edwin Real of the Facebook group, Eating and Drinking in San Diego, the event also brings in local breweries, distillers, coffee roasters and kombucha and hard cider makers, all of which will join forces with about 20 cheese purveyors. The “liquid” vendors include Modern Times, Eppig Brewing, Boochcraft, Bivouac Ciderworks, and more. Cheeses will be supplied by Venissimo Raclette Bar and Cheesesmith, both from San Diego, plus Point Reyes

gay-sd.com

Cohn Restaurant Group circles back to Allied Gardens/Del Cerro with a fresh venture. (Haley Hill Photography)

A cheese expo is coming to Point Loma. (Photos by Frank Sabatini Jr.) Farmstead from northern California, Columbia Cheese from New York, Gruyere 1655 from Switzerland, and others. Admission ranges from $25 to $350. Proceeds will benefit Kitchens for Good, a nonprofit that helps break the cycles of food waste, poverty and hunger through innovation programs. 2863 Historic Decatur Road, 858-365-0882, eventbrite.com/e/ liquid-city-cheese-expo-2019.

Service call buttons are all the rage at Cohn Restaurant Group’s newest bar and restaurant, Del’s Hideout. Located in the Allied Gardens/ Del Cerro community, the 5,400-square-foot venture replaces The Junk House sports bar. The address marks the spot where David and Leslie Cohn opened their first restaurant, a small diner in 1981 called Rory’s. The family-friendly establishment offers retro arcade games, a children’s play zone and a dozen TV screens for airing sporting matches. There’s also a full cocktail bar, an expansive patio, and a GPSsupported “butler bell” system that allows customers to reorder drinks and other items from their tables after placing initial orders at the counter. Executive chef Tim Eylens, an expert in Southern cooking, brings to the table dishes such as barbecue pork belly, blackened local fish, specialty burgers and more. 5351 Adobe Falls Road, 619-236-1299, dinecrg. com.

Los Angeles-based Elite Restaurant Group recently purchased the three remaining locations of Project Pie in San Diego County, which includes the outlet at 3884 Fourth Ave. in Hillcrest. The others are in Chula Vista and Eastlake. A source connected with the sale tells us the restaurant group will likely convert the Project Pie eateries into Patxis Pizza shops, a brand-name concept it has established in cities throughout California and Colorado. The company also owns Slater’s 50/50 and Daphne’s restaurants. patxispizza.com.

11 TH

—Frank Sabatini Jr. can be reached at fsabatini@san.rr.com.t

ANNUAL

friday, may 17

7:30–9am

Hilton San Diego Bayfront • 1 Park Blvd. Downtown San Diego

Buy your tickets now! Tickets are available at events.thecentersd.org/HMDB or by calling 619.692.2077 All proceeds from this event will benefit The San Diego LGBT Community Center. In the last year, The Center provided more than 82,000 service visits to San Diego community members, and through its events, activities and advocacy, touched the lives of thousands more.

DINING

gay-sd.com

The Original Sab-E-Lee 6925 Linda Vista Road (Linda Vista) 858-650-6868 theoriginalsabelee.com Prices: Appetizers, $6.95 to $9.95 Soups and salads, $7.95 to $13.95 Noodles, curries and rice dishes; $8.95 to $13.95 Specialties, $8.95 to $14.95 The Original Sab-E-Lee became more visible a few years ago when moving to this structure. (Photos by Frank Sabatini Jr.)

Devilish Thai M

y husband loves Thai cuisine. And so do I. But he’s afraid of the food at The Original Sab-ELee because of a dish he once ordered at level three, which caused him to practically stuff his head into a pitcher of ice water to quell his perspiring, red face. He’s a Midwestern meat-and-potatoes lightweight when it comes to spicy foods. But indeed, compared to other Thai kitchens, the 10-point heat scale here is tailored to natives of Thailand’s northeastern Isaan region. So are many of the non-pedestrian menu choices, which is exactly why you should skip over the usual pad Thai and drunken noodles and take a walk on the wild side with things like beef salad, Isaan-style sausage and duck larb. The restaurant moved a few years ago from a hole-in-thewall space with five tables (now Thai Papaya) to a brighter, roomier structure about two blocks away. It still only accepts cash. And the kitchen’s liberal use of bird’s eye chilies still sends you to capsaicin dreamland if you request level three or higher. After a lengthy hiatus, hubs joined me for a return visit under the agreement he would request level one for his meal. Despite my penchant for fiery flavors, and knowing I’d be forking into his food, I consented. Though Malaysian in origin, the panang curry is exceptional. It offers an intriguing spice

structure that results in sweet, salty and creamy flavors. We detected coconut cream, lemongrass, coriander and safe measures of red chili paste. At level one, it offered just the right amount of zip to balance the sweetness. As with all of the curries, there are numerous proteins you can choose from — tofu, pork, beef, shrimp, duck or mock duck. Hubby chose chicken, which turned out to be all breast meat. I veered into the rice category and chose crab fried rice — actually fake crab using pollock, as confirmed by our waiter. I don’t mind the stuff. Ordered at level three, the slow burn I desired became evident about two forkfuls in. The rice was super fluffy, strewn with perfectly cooked scrambled eggs and accented with raw onions and freshsqueezed lime. I wanted the dish to never end. Conversely, I’m not fond of eating this much white rice in one sitting because of the high carbs. But I thought, just this one time and I won’t do it again for a long while. In previous visits, a friend with a steel-lined palate ordered the larb duck at level eight. I sampled all but a few granules of the minced fowl with the tip of my fork and felt the nerve endings in my forehead pulsate the moment it passed my lips. Though way hotter than I prefer, the flavor of the meat and its herby lime sauce sprang forth. A salad of spicy raw beef

served over lettuce leaves was feisty. But don’t expect anything that even closely resembles carpaccio or tartare. The beef was served in small chunks and sported a dried texture, thus it didn’t rip apart in the mouth as gently. Thai sausage, available as an appetizer or in fried rice, is a treat. A few years ago they were offered without their casings, which I liked. But that’s no longer the case. Nevertheless, the meat flaunts a novel sour and gingery character achieved from citrus and aromatic galangal powder. Whispers of curry paste in the grind deepen the flavor. Not everything on the lengthy menu is spicy. There’s pad Thai, if you must, the ubiquitous rice-noodle dish that derives most of its flavor from tamarind paste and ground peanuts. Refuge can also be found in garlic chicken wings, which really aren’t so garlicky, plus pineapple fried rice studded with fat cashews and large chunks of the fruit. Consider that a mid-course dessert. Whatever your preference, The Original Sab-E-Lee provides a refreshing slate of choices compared to most Thai restaurants in the gayborhood and beyond. All of the common flavors we’ve come to know from Thai cuisine are present, yet the dishes are stamped with an elusive complexity that coddles and mystifies the taste buds — even when they sting. —Frank Sabatini Jr. is the author of “Secret San Diego” (ECW Press), and began his local writing career more than two decades ago as a staffer for the former San Diego Tribune. You can reach him at fsabatini@san.rr.com.t

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NEWS

GAY SAN DIEGO May 10-23, 2019

FROM PAGE 1

GAY PRIDE include everybody and bring them together and have them be supportive. We are all one.” D'Nalga said that just because the representatives for San Diego Gay Pride are selected through the court, it does not necessarily mean that they have to become part of the court, but that they do encourage their participation. “It is definitely an invitation for them to see how we function, what we do and where those funds are generally going,” said D’Nalga. “Last year, [fundraising by candidates] went to the Scott Carlson Thanksgiving Dinner. Our Ms.

and Mr. were there last year and were able to see that the fundraisers they did helped provide more than 400 meals to homeless people or people that did not have a Thanksgiving. We have a lot of events that happen every year and we are proud of the fact that we can keep those traditions alive and give back to the community. And not just our LGBT community, but friends and people in the community that need something for their children.’ D'Nalga said in reality, this is a chance for Pride ambassadors to be visible and to be part of something and represent the San Diego community. Blocker said the addition of MX is a gender-nonconforming title, so anyone that does not fall into the spectrum of Mr.,

Miss, or Ms. can run for the MX title. He said through the years, the way candidates are chosen has changed, some of this modeled by other courts in the system. “It used to be that [candidates] stood up in front of a panel and spoke and boom, they were the winner,” Blocker said. “We've now modeled it after a few other courts with campaigning as a fundraiser.” Blocker said candidates have an entire month to raise money and each dollar counts as a vote. Then, at the crowning ceremony, the winner is based on the amount of money that they have raised. “Part of the title is representing the court, but it goes further than that in the aspect

gay-sd.com that they have to produce two fundraisers between July of this year and July of next year,” Blocker said. “It is an opportunity for people [who] want to be involved with the court, but don't want to jump in head first as a royale or a monarch. It is a way for them to kind of get their feet wet.” For Pride, titleholders will be featured in the parade and the court is working with Pride to get them some recognition at the festival. “It is a civic title that gives the people exposure to everyone else and to the court and what we do,” Blocker said. “We ask them to show up at certain events such as South Bay Pride, different fundraisers and we give them the opportunity to walk as a civic title at the coronation.” Blocker recommended getting applications in as soon as possible, as they will be reviewing them beginning June 1, and candidate campaigning and fundraising will start on June 5. “We provide them with an online fundraising platform

FROM PAGE 7

BULLYING of that, the language that is used in locker rooms ... and the language that you are constantly around, they use a lot of homo-negative language,” McGillis said. “They are constantly putting each other down by feminizing one another or using homo-negative words to say that you are less adept. I think that there is a presumption that if you are gay, that you are feminine and that you wouldn't be tough enough to play this sport.” Reddy said that she thinks it has to do with the hypermasculinity in male sports, but that women's sports are not exempt from that, especially in the world of golf. “The majority of our viewers and spectators are men,” Reddy said. “In order for women's golf to gain traction, there is such a heavy emphasis on how we get that male viewership. That kind of structures women's golf to be geared toward what guys are going to like, essentially positioning female athletes as objects of desire to watch. That

from June 5 to July 5,” Blocker said. “They can do whatever they want to fundraise. And at the event, they will have a [final] opportunity to fundraise more that will be added to their total. There will be a lot of out-of-town guests at the event from different courts in Orange County, Long Beach, Hollywood and Los Angeles [who will] come down and support. We raised a little more than $5,000 last year. It was the most raised since LaLa was crowned in 1992.” The crowning of San Diego Pride titleholders will be on July 6 at the Gossip Grill from 5-8 p.m. For more information and to get an application, contact Steven Blocker at princeroyalesd@gmail.com or Jessica D’Nalga at Jessicadfab@gmail. com. Deadline for applications is May 31. —Albert Fulcher can be reached at albert@sdcnn.com. (Graphic by www.CanStockPhoto.com)t puts a lot of undue pressure on us to present ourselves in a specific way in order to get sponsorship. Being a queer athlete is a negative and we are all running away from that as far as possible.” McGillis said in hockey, if other players are associated with him, they face the question, “Are you gay?” He said that is constantly the case whether you are male or female. He said overall, sports is entertainment and when you play sports, you are looking for viewership. But he said that he believes that there are so many things in the world that matter more than sports. “I believe the statistic is 43% of trans persons who commit suicide,” McGillis said. “I had a trans man reach out to me last week, 15 or 16, who started body building as a way to stop cutting himself. If that is an outlet that he can have and allows him to live, and be a happy man in this world, then why would we prevent that? Sports is beautiful and wonderful and gives us so much. But that person deserves to love their sport. They deserve the same rights as the rest of us. There are so many bigger things in the world and people have to stop looking with such narrow minds.” To learn more about the national panel discussions with LGBTs in The News with Thom Senzee, visit lgbtsinthenews.com. Sponsors of the “Spectator or Star Player: We Can All Help End Bullying in Sports”: SAGAFTRA LGBTQ Committee; You Can Play; Dr. Bronner's; San Diego Press Club; San Diego Gulls; MO's Universe | insideOUT; San Diego Diplomacy Council; Top of the Bay | Porto Vista Hotel; Lafayette Hotel; Trans Family Support Services. —Albert Fulcher can be reached at albert@sdcnn.com. (Graphic by www. CanStockPhoto.com)t

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RuPaul’s Drag Race – Rupaul’s Drag Race Season 11 Tour tickets are now on sale. This phenomenal show will take place at the Historic Balboa Theatre on May 28 at 8 p.m. Tickets start at $45.50. 868 Fourth Ave. bit.ly/30f5RpE Leading with Love Gala – Tickets now available for North County LGBTQ Resource Center’s “Leading with Love: An LGBTQI Gala Experience.” Again this year, the partnership with the Leichtag Foundation brings the gala back to its wonderful farm, a perfect backdrop to enjoy the sunset while dining with friends and family, listening to live music and supporting the local LGBTQI community. For programs this year, the goal is to raise $100,000. Early-bird tickets: $125. Event sponsorships begin at $1,500. Auction items are also encouraged to raise funds. The Farm of Leichtag Foundation, 441 Saxony Road, Encinitas. bit.ly/2LfL6qp

Friday, May 10

Mama’s Day 2019 – Mama’s Kitchen is prepping for its 28th annual Mama’s Day taking place at the Hyatt Regency La Jolla at Aventine. Mama’s Day, often touted as the original San Diego tasting event, is held the Friday evening before Mother’s Day and features more than 50 restaurants offering distinctive tastes to more than 600 attendees. Proceeds from the event help to raise critical funds for Mama's Kitchen's mission to deliver three medically-tailored, nutritional meals a day, seven days a week and free of charge to local women, men and children vulnerable to hunger due to HIV, cancer or other critical illnesses. Tickets: $150 general admission. $250 VIP. More packages and opportunity drawing available. Hyatt Regency La Jolla, 3777 La Jolla Village Drive. 5:309:30 p.m. bit.ly/2DkBMLw ‘They Promised Her the Moon’ – The Old Globe’s West Coast premiere of Laurel Ollstein’s “They Promised Her the Moon” has been extended and will run through May 12. Developed in the Globe’s

gay-sd.com Powers New Voices Festival, it wowed festival audiences with the story of the powerful forces that kept one woman from reaching orbit. Directed by Giovanna Sardelli (the Globe’s “The Whipping Man and “Somewhere”), “They Promised Her the Moon” runs at the Sheryl and Harvey White Theatre, part of the Conrad Prebys Theatre Center. Tickets start at $30. 1363 Old Globe Way. bit.ly/2vadOOl ‘Sister Act’ – San Diego Musical Theatre presents “Sister Act,” the feel-good musical comedy smash based on the hit 1992 film that has audiences jumping to their feet! When disco diva, Deloris Van Cartier, witnesses a murder, she is put in protective custody in the one place the cops are sure she won’t be a found: a convent! Disguised as a nun, she finds herself at odds with both the rigid lifestyle and uptight Mother Superior. Filled with powerful gospel music, outrageous dancing and a truly moving story, “Sister Act” will leave audiences breathless. A sparkling tribute to the universal power of friendship, “Sister Act” is reason to rejoice! San Diego Musical Theatre. Runs through May 26. $30-$70. Horton Grand Theatre. 444 Fourth Ave. bit.ly/2GoB5BE

Saturday, May 11

and one woman passes away from the disease every day? The key to lowering these numbers is early detection and effective treatment. As you know, women oftentimes are busy taking care of others and neglect to put themselves first, so to kick off Mother's Day weekend, Komen San Diego is partnering with the San Diego Padres to encourage qualified (uninsured or underinsured) San Diegans to make their breast health a priority by providing free breast screenings. Petco Park, 100 Park Blvd. 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Free to those who qualify. bit.ly/2Vhl36F

Tuesday, May 14

Drag Takeover – Come to the Belly Up to support the North County LGBTQ Resource Center and Pride by the Beach with “RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars” winner Chad Michaels and the San Diego Drag All Stars making queer history in the first drag show to take place on the Belly Up stage. Dress in drag for discounted tix and a chance to meet Chad and the all-stars. All proceeds benefit the North County LGBT Center and Pride by the beach. Tickets: $25 advance and day of show. $20 military/ student discount. 7:30 p.m. $75 VIP part/$125 VIP and meet-and-greet. 143 S. Cedros Ave., Solana Beach. bit.ly/2W9lhJC

We Were Here – History of the LGBTQ+ community in the South Bay is hosted by the South Bay Historical Society and The Chula Vista Heritage Program. Panelists include Walther Meyer of Lambda Archives, Chula Vista Councilmember Steve Padilla, PFLAG member Zaneta Encaration, Dae Elliott and Gibran Guido. There will be a special performance by the San Diego Women’s Chorus and an opportunity drawing for tickets to a Train/Goo Goo Dolls concert. This event is free and open to the public. Chula Vista Public Library Auditorium. 35 F St. Chula Vista.

Gay Men’s Book Club – The new Gay Men's Book Club will meet on May 14, to discuss this month's selection, “Giovanni's Room” by James Baldwin, a groundbreaking novel for its time about a young man torn between his attraction to a woman and his desire for another man. Anyone interested in novels, memoirs and plays with gay themes is welcome to join the club. 6-7:30 p.m. at the Mission Hills-Hillcrest Library, 215 W. Washington St. Contact Ron Alsop at ronald.alsop@gmail.com or 908-347-3877 for more information.

Free breast health screenings – Did you know that in San Diego, six women are diagnosed with breast cancer

Harvey Milk Diversity Breakfast – The Harvey Milk Diversity Breakfast is designed to bring together more than

Friday, May 17

1,000 diverse San Diegans — business, labor, Democrats, Republicans, all communities, all ages, all San Diegans who support equality and justice — to celebrate the memory of this influential civil rights activist. The 2019 Harvey Milk Diversity Breakfast will be held on Friday, May 17, at the Hilton San Diego Bayfront Hotel. Proceeds benefit the social services programs of the San Diego LGBT Community Center. 1 Park Blvd. Book a table here: bit.ly/2UCGheS

Saturday, May 18

‘Quiet No More’ – The San Diego Women’s Chorus presents “Quiet No More: A Choral Celebration of Stonewall,” a two-day event on May 18-19. This inspiring event will honor the 50th anniversary of the Stonewall uprising. SDWC will present the San Diego premiere of “Quiet No More,” a brand new, unique work that will commemorate and convey the impact and legacy of Stonewall. “Quiet No More” will tell the Stonewall story clearly and passionately and will include previously unheard voices and the latest historical insights. The history of Stonewall balances the uprising’s continuing impact in the present moment with the future campaigning work still to be done. A blend of classical, musical theater and pop styles, the music will incorporate the perspectives of women and other minority participants in the uprising. Tickets: VIP: $30. General admission: $20 (advance), $25 (at door). Discounts for youth, students, military, seniors and disabled. Lincoln High School. May 18 at 7 p.m. May 19 at 4 p.m. 4777 Imperial Ave. bit.ly/2DDWTsn Long Beach Pride 2019 – Two-day event! Over the past several years, the Long Beach Lesbian & Gay Pride Festival & Parade has become the third largest in the nation, now attracting over 80,000 participants over the two-day celebration. More than 200 marching groups and floats comprise the parade entries since 1995, representing various religious, human service, governmental and social organizations. May

History of the transgender flag – The San Diego LGBT Community Center’s Project TRANS is proud to present a special evening with Monica F. Helms, creator of the transgender flag. This free event will take place at The Center, 3909 Centre St. This year marks the 20th anniversary of the transgender flag. A transgender activist and the author of a “More Than Just a Flag,” Helms will read excerpts from her new book and participate in a Q&A session. She will also sign her book and transgender flags. Helms created the transgender pride flag in 1999 and it was first flown in 2000 at an LGBT Pride parade in Phoenix, Arizona. Helms donated the original transgender pride flag to the Smithsonian on Aug. 19, 2014, at the first ceremony honoring the addition of a collection of LGBT historical items. The flag has become known internationally representing the transgender and non-binary communities. Free to the public. 5 p.m. Contact: trans@thecentersd.org. Senior Resource Fair – It’s that time of the year again! It’s time for The San Diego LGBT Community Center’s 13th annual Senior Resource Fair! The event will include educational and information booths featuring: The chance to meet local health and human services reps; in-home health aids and services; retirement villages and homes; and much more. Free lunch will be provided to the first 125 attendees who are age 50 and over. For more information, contact LaRue Fields at 619-692-2077 x205 or seniors@thecentersd.org. bit.ly/2vBoHJzt

QSyndicate.com

Q Q PUZZLE PUZZLE

solution on page 13

RECOMPENCE

DOWN

ACROSS

Across 1 Ones stuck under G-strings, e.g. 5 “Downton Abbey” neckwear 10 Mistake for Paul Taylor 14 Chocolate sandwich 15 Joe of “NCIS” 16 Go in only partway, at the beach 17 Start of a Mike Pence “quote” attributed by Bill Maher 20 Switch positions 21 Minor scrape 22 Wet area around bushes 23 Makes alterations to 24 Fraiser portrayer 28 What the Devil wears, in a movie 30 More frigid 31 Angry in., for example 32 Trick joint, maybe 36 More of the “quote” 37 Discharge on one’s face 38 More of the “quote”

18-19, a two-day LGBTQ+ event with live music, community programming, and food and drinks from local eateries. The Long Beach Pride Festival is inclusive and strives to promote an environment that is free from prejudice and bias. This year’s theme is “Millions of Moments of Pride: Stonewall 50th Anniversary.” Sunday, May 19, the 2019 Pride Parade. Tickets: $20-$125. Marina Green Park, 386 E. Shoreline Drive, Long Beach. longbeachpride.com

39 Legal matter 40 Land of Emma Donoghue 41 Hagar's dog 42 Enjoys phone sex 44 Gather closely 45 Two-footers? 48 Org. for narcs 49 Gave the slip to 50 John of “Hairspray” 55 End of the “quote” 57 Taking care of business 58 Cut out 59 Coin of Versace's homeland 60 Walk the waiting room 61 Prefix with dog 62 “Brady Bunch” prefix

1 Do that may need hair spray 2 Sea-bordering Uzbekistan 3 Top Four game 4 Where Dr. C. Torres works 5 Leslie in “Gone with the Wind” 6 Cuddle in bed 7 Tent site 8 The Plastic ___ Band 9 High-ranking active partners? 10 Queen of diamonds and queen of spades, e.g. 11 Steven Greenberg, for one 12 Bonehead 13 Bill of legend 18 Put forward 19 Cultivated pansies 24 Catwoman portrayer Eartha 25 Off-the-wall feedback? 26 One with flaming pants? 27 Pick a time to become wives 28 Benjamin Britten's Peter

29 One way to have your meat 31 Golda from the land of the cut 33 Have an opening for 34 British peer 35 Feminizing tail 37 “I Shall Not Care” poet Sara 41 Gracefully tactful 43 Adam and Steve's locale? 44 Presided over 45 Jazz genre 46 Ex of one we hope will soon be an ex-president 47 “___ Room” 48 Tee shot for Rosie Jones 50 Peter or Paul but not Mary 51 Mail carriers at Hogwarts 52 Debussy's milk 53 British car wheel 54 Lickety-split 56 Cruising locale

ENTERTAINMENT

gay-sd.com

RuPaul’s Drag Race: Season 11 Tour coming to San Diego Albert H. Fulcher | Editor After kicking off during RuPauls DragCon LA 2019 on May 25, the Official RuPaul’s Drag Race: Season 11 Tour is heading to San Diego on May 28 brought by Emmy-award winning production company World of Wonder and Voss Events. With a dragalicious lineup, all 15 season 11 queens including A'keria Chanel Davenport, Ariel Versace, Brooke Lynn Hytes, Honey Davenport, Kahanna Montrese, Mercedes Iman Diamond, Nina West, Plastique Tiara, Ra'Jah O'Hara, Scarlet Envy, Shuga Cain, Silky Nutmeg Ganache, Soju, Vanessa “Vanjie” Mateo, and Yvie Oddly will slay the runway as the tour commences and continues to sixteen cities across the US and Canada. Season 10 Queen Asia O’Hara will serve as host for the tour again this year in San Diego. “This summer I’m hitting the road with the baddest queens in the land ... the land of Season 11!” said Asia O’Hara. “All bets are off, and all rules are out the window as the queens show you what they are really made of! And of course, I’ll be safe behind the microphone.” Season 11’s Yvie Oddly took some time to give us a little insight to the upcoming show and what to expect. Can you tell me a little about yourself and your journey to RuPaul’s Drag Race? I am born and raised in the mile-high city, Denver, Colorado. I am a classically trained artist through Denver’s School of the Arts and found my audience through DRAG “The Art Form in the Queer Mind’s Eye.” I am a creature of the local club culture and strive to push boundaries with my looks and performances. What has the exposure of Drag Race done for you personally? It’s always been my dream to travel and perform. Thanks to the fans of Drag Race I am Odd Blessed and booked around the world! I’m looking forward to the tour hitting San Diego, what can you tell me about the tour show? Get ready for the best tour production you can imagine! The

MICHAEL KIMMEL Psychotherapist Author of "Life Beyond Therapy" in Gay San Diego 5100 Marlborough Drive San Diego CA 92116 (619)955-3311 www.LifeBeyondTherapy.com

RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 11’s Yvie Oddly (Photos courtesy Brandon Voss/Voss Events) chemistry and raw talent/ passion in our cast will come alive in its full glory. What should San Diego expect with the touring show? San Diego should expect a wide variety, spice and flavor. Expect to be entertained! Is there a favorite part of the show that you are looking forward to? I always look forward to meeting the fans. Words can’t even begin to describe how magical it feels to connect with people all over the world through my vision in drag! Who do you like to perform with the most? I don’t know. This will be my first time performing on stage with these queens. What advice do you for the inspiring young drag queens? QUIT DRAG! Huehuehuehuehue! Who do you like to perform with the most? I enjoy the unique chemistry I have with all my cysters. However, it’s no secret that Plastique and I are a legendary duo, with a dynamic contrast in our drag expression. “RuPaul’s Drag Race: Season 11 Tour” is playing at the Historic Balboa Theatre on May 28 from 8-10 p.m. Tickets are $42-$52. VIP Meet & Greet Packages are available online with a private meet and greet with the queens before the show, a customized VIP laminate and a seat in the first few rows. VIPs must arrive by 6 p.m. VIP tickets are $120. Visit vossevents.com. —Albert Fulcher can be reached at albert@sdcnn.com.t

1/5H CCBC

GAY SAN DIEGO May 10-23, 2019

FEATURE

GAY SAN DIEGO May 10-23, 2019

FROM PAGE 1

DREW BLAIR net proceeds going to AIDS Life/Cycle. Well attended, this event promoted arriving as your authentic self, and along with some vibrant socializing, patrons chose from a myriad of sex toys and accessories for a special photo shoot in which Blair used a “Brady Bunch” square panel exhibit suitable for students. His message is clear: There is no shame in sexuality and how a person chooses to live it and play with it as long as they are educated on the diverse sexuality that all humans possess. Drew Blair attended college at Kentucky’s Morehead State Alexander Salazar used his Alexander Fine Arts studio to debut Drew Blair’s University in the same county “Equal Sex Ed: Art sExibition” with all net proceeds going towards AIDS/ of Kim Davis — the clerk who LifeCycle. (Photo by Molly O’Brien) notoriously (and illegally) denied marriage licenses, some of them being for his college classmates. Blair said. “I want equality in “I wanted to bring it up His senior art exhibition was sex education. I want same-sex again,” Salazar said. “Not just denied because it was too “homo- partnerships [to be taught], and for the sake of conversation, but erotic,” even though Blair was discussions about toy play — for the sake of raising money the 2010 class valedictorian. talk about everything. We need for organizations that have lost “I decided that I had to to show it. They are on PornHub tremendous funding by the create art that was me,” Blair looking at it as kids anyway, so government.” said. “Still gay, still proud, still we need to educate them so that Salazar is participating for playful, but approachable and they don't hurt themselves exthe second year in AIDS Life/ not offensive. So I've created a perimenting. We need sex-educa- Cycle as a rider and last year candy-coated version of an object tion classes on a high school level was able to raise $18,000. that is typically phallic and comand I'm here to promote that.” “I'm doing it again this fortable for people to approach Alexander Salazar said when year and hoping to double that and you cannot say it is not apBlair approached him about amount by committing my proachable now.” this exhibit, his first thought time, myself, my business and Blair explained that the whole turned to AIDS Life/Cycle. He with the support of people like point of his new series is to make said during the ’90s, there was a Drew, I can do that,” Salazar people comfortable with sex besexual revolution going on when said. “This exhibit is not just a cause he wants it talked about in AIDS happened, and he believes launch, but it is also to support school on levels that have never that this is a discussion that is a new artist. I believe in helping CMI_Half_Page_English_Bleed.pdf 1 2/5/19 PM happened. not happening now as 8:06 it should artists and other gay and lesbian “I don't want just health,” be. artists because I believe we are

gay-sd.com overlooked because our topics can sometimes be driven by our subculture. “I believe we have an amazing subculture and we should not be ashamed of it,” Salazar continued. “The launch is just for two days, but the gallery will continue working with Drew with the plans to take the exhibit internationally and spread the message. It is not just an art show. Drew has a lot of energy, he's very excited and it is very contagious.” Blair’s exhibit has some very personal elements in it from his love of art, its history and what he hopes for the future. “You'll see that the colors selected are from a 1980s favorite sculpture of mine from the Parisian School of Design by Ettore Sottsass,” Blair said. “I could not afford the shelving unit, it is $40,000, but I could take the colors in that shelving unit and put it in my art. So my work is inspired by Ettore, Andy Warhol, Keith Haring and they are the reason that tonight is about giving to AIDS Life/Cycle because they died and were not able to finish their missions.” Blair said the colors are so relatable that it makes a space playful and happy. He believes that all adults, just like children should have a playroom. “I feel if Andy Warhol were here today, he would be proud of me painting a dildo in lieu of a banana because the banana was his first suggestion in this direction,” Blair said. “And today, we are ready for a movement in this direction and I couldn't have done it in a more candy-coated playful way.”

Blair said he really respected the graphic training that he received, but he is very self-educated. “When I got out of college, it was two years after the recession,” Blair said. “I was competing for employment with people that had 40 years of graphic design experience. They were amazing and I was new to the industry, so I couldn't get a job. For the last nine years, I've been doing cultural studies to find out what I'm about so I could produce a series strong enough to get into the graphic design industry full swing. “I'm showing a whole graphic design portfolio, hand-painted from original concept to completion,” Blair continued. “Every minute inch in this gallery is measured out visually without a tape measure. I have Asperger's [syndrome], so I use that through my art. This is my own therapy actually happening. I've followed Alex for several years. I like his curation. I like the artists he has backed, but I'm still independent. I love AIDS Life/Cycle as an organization, and I want to give all of the net proceeds to that.” Drew Blair will be launching some gear (he was sporting a four-color harness) that supports the eight main colors of this series. For more about Drew Blair, his art and his Equal Sex Ed campaign, visit equalsexed.com. For more information about current and upcoming exhibits at Alexander Salazar Fine Art in Downtown San Diego, visit alexandersalazarfineart.com. —Albert Fulcher can be reached at albert@sdcnn.com.t

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