MIXED by School of Art, George Mason University

BY KASEY THOMAS

Copyright ÂŠ 2020 Kasey Thomas All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission from the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

MIXED. A BOOK ABOUT IDENTITY. This book is dedicated to my amazing mother, for always inspiring me to be proud of who I am.

CONTENTS 01 02 03 04

MIXED INTRO. 02–05 MIXED FAMILY. 06–09 MIXED CHILDHOOD. 10–13 MIXED ADULTHOOD. 14–17

05 06 07 08

MIXED RACISM. 18–21 MIXED MEDIA. 22–25 MIXED LIFE. 26–29 MIXED CONCLUSION. 30–31

MIXED INTRO. Mixed. What is Mixed? It’s…well, it’s pretty complicated, isn’t it? Mixed can be what your oil paint is when you’re trying to get that perfect shade of blue. Mixed can also be your nice, fresh cup of lemonade on a hot summer day. But when I say “mixed” what am I talking about specifically? I’m talking about the millions of Americans that come from many different cultural and racial backgrounds.

“At this point, our ancestries go back so far that we can’t even truly know the extent of our heritage.”

So many people in America are mixed. So many people around the world are mixed, and yet, a lot of people don’t really understand what that means. A lot of people don’t even consider the possibility that someone might be more than their skin tone, complexion or facial features. In all honesty, all of us are probably a little bit mixed. At this point, our ancestries go back so far that we can’t even truly know the extent of our heritage. 3

In American society, people are often placed into little boxes. White. Black. Cuban. Korean. All of these races and ethnicities that are found in the melting pot that is America. But, really, is it that simple? In short, no it isn’t. I can walk down the street, look at someone and instantly make a judgment in my head about their entire cultural background, make a guess about what race they might be, just based off of their appearance. Oftentimes, that’s how our society works. But maybe that’s not how it should work.

“In American society, people are often placed into little boxes.”

So many people out there are incredibly unique. Everyone has a story. Everyone has a background. Assumptions just disregard all of the amazing parts of each person in this world. So, what is mixed? It’s our story, our background, our heritage and ethnicity, our race. It’s all of those things. Mixed people all have their own unique ways of identifying themselves. That’s what mixed is.

MIXED FAMILY.

I come from a mixed family. My maternal grandfather is white, and my maternal grandmother is black. They had two kids, my mother and my uncle. Then my mother married my father, who is white, and they had two children, my brother and me. My uncle has three kids of his own as well. Together, we all make a big mixed family. From a young age, I’ve been taught to be proud of my mixed heritage. My mother always told me, “You’re mixed. You’re black and white. You’re both,” so, for me, I’m both. And that’s it.

“YOU’RE MIXED. YOU’RE BLACK AND WHITE. YOU’RE BOTH.”

Family gatherings are always a little interesting. There’s different culture, different life experiences from family member to family member, and it’s helped me learn a lot about life, and about what people go through in life. When everyone comes together, even though we all definitely don’t look the same, we all enjoy each other’s company the same. There’s a lot of love and acceptance in my family. It has always been an experience when all of my family comes to an academic event to support me. As a child, friends of mine would come up to me after seeing me with my grandmother and say things like, “You’re black?”

“You’re black?”

There are many aspects to a mixed family’s dynamic. Some of my family members look “stereotypically black” when they aren’t. Some look “stereotypically white.” Everyone in my family will have different life experiences because of this. When we all go out together, people sometimes stare or give us confused glances. There are a lot of things to navigate. But at the heart of every family, there’s love, and there’s a lot of love that goes into my family. We’re all very different but we all love each other the same. Maybe that’s what being mixed really is. 9

MIXED CHILDHO Being a mixed child is weird. Being a mixed child in the early 2000s is weird. When I was going through elementary school, we had forms to fill out in class. These forms would have a section where you’re supposed to pick your race. The problem for me was, there was no “two or more races” at the time. That’s a weird moment for a third grader to have, which is why I say growing up mixed can be a little weird. You sit there and think for a moment. You wonder, am I supposed to pick one or the other? Am I black? Am I white? Am I betraying the other half of me if I pick just one? It’s a lot to unpack at a young age. Thankfully, my mother was always open about everything. She taught me what it means to be mixed, and I’m so incredibly grateful for that.

OOD.

When the forms stopped making me pick, I was really excited about that. I was excited to get to be mixed. But, still, a lot of people went by my looks. I look a bit confusing. Some have told me I look White. Some have told me I look Latina. Some have said Italian. It varies from person to person. Interestingly, other mixed people can usually recognize that I’m mixed. When race would come up in class, and I’d say that I’m black and white, I’d get all sorts of reactions: “No, you’re not.”

All of school pretty much went like this. Some people even broke my race down to the percentage. My black friends would

“You’re black!?”

jokingly say, “Well, you’re not 100% black…”

“So, you’re an Oreo?”

There were all sorts of jokes. They never

“Whoa, that’s cool!”

really bothered me. Probably because people I was friendly with were saying them, and there was never any malice behind their words. Besides, I was just happy that I got to be mixed. It was something I was proud of then, and something I am still proud of now. For me, it represents my family, my loved ones. It represents what makes me myself.

“NO, YOU’RE NOT.” “SO, YOU’RE AN OREO?” “YOU’RE BLACK!?” “WHOA, THAT’S COOL!”

MIXED ADULTHO Adulthood has been a bit of a wakeup call

During my time in college, I’ve met plenty

for me. The jokes are pretty much gone,

of awesome mixed people. It’s amazing to

but judgment and assumptions have taken

meet people you can relate to. My college

their place. People look at me and assume

is diverse in general, which is so refresh-

what my race is, and based on that, they

ing because everyone has to take a step

assume what kind of privilege I have and

back and try to understand one another.

what kind of life I live.

Overall, being mixed as an adult is proba-

People give me shocked expressions

bly just as weird as being mixed as a kid.

when they find out I’m mixed. Some peo-

People judge the way you speak, the way

ple look at me like they don’t believe me.

you dress, the way you gesture. They don’t

Some people discredit one of my races

get it because they don’t know what kind

depending on their own personal biases.

of culture you come from. They’re just

It’s weird. Things are still weird, even as an

going off of what they’ve assumed your

adult. But that’s okay. I’ve already learned

culture is, and that can create a lot of

to embrace the weird.

misunderstandings.

Meeting other mixed adults is a joy. There’s this instant comradery that happens between two mixed people. You look at one another and you’re like, “You…You’re mixed!? Me too! Yay!”

OOD.

LIVING IN THE WORLD AS A MIXED ADULT.

Sometimes I’ll talk with someone who is black and we’ll talk about things black people face in American society, things that I have actually faced as well, and I can tell the person I’m talking to is wondering why it sounds like I’ve been through the things we’re talking about. Then I have to do the awkward, “Yeah, I’m mixed,” spiel and they’re like, “Ohhhh. This makes so much sense now!” Some people don’t assume my race and when I tell them, they’re polite and we end up having a great conversation. That’s always the best. Overall, our world is constantly moving forward and changing, so being mixed isn’t so bad right now. There’s always the occasionally awkward, maybe racist, and definitely weird situations, but there are also a lot of really cool things that come from being a mixed adult in 2020 America. 17

MIXED RACISM. So, this is where being mixed can be not-so-fun. I’ve experienced a lot of racism throughout the course of my life. I’ve been sitting next to white people and heard them use the n-word, them not knowing that I’m white AND black. That’s always awkward and I’ve never really known what exactly to do in that situation.

I’ve been told by black people that I’m, “Not black enough,” which is always crazy to hear. I’ve been called a “mulatto” in a not-so-friendly way. I’ve been called the n-word by people who most definitely should not be calling me that name. I’ve had people come up to me and speak Spanish to me, get mad when I can’t respond, and tell me that I should learn my own language. 19

A lot of racism towards mixed people comes from people assuming their race. People assume my race all the time and then get mad at me for not being the race they’ve decided that I am. It puts a lot of pressure on me. I walk around and wonder when I’m going to get into one of these situations again, and I have to think of how to handle it. People have told me I don’t look black enough to be a person of color. People have asked me why I’m a white person that talks or gestures like a black person. And what exactly does that mean? It’s assumptions. A lot of assumptions. Just ask people what’s up. I’m never offended when someone asks me my race. I’m delighted, actually, because it means they took the time to check. It means they cared, and that’s always lovely.

ASSUMPTIONS. ASSUMPTIONS. ASSUMPTIONS. ASSUMPTIONS. ASSUMPTIONS. ASSUMPTIONS.

MIXED MEDIA. When I say “mixed media” I don’t mean it in an art sense. I mean, what is there for mixed people when it comes to media? What kind of representation do mixed people have on TV, in movies, in books and so on? What kind of mixed people do young mixed kids have to look up to? Well, the answer is: there’s not a lot of that just yet.

Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re getting there. Our 44th president was mixed. But he never really embraced that the way all of us mixed kids probably needed. He was Barack Obama, the first black president. And thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s okay. I respect his choice to identify that way, but it does kind of push away the opportunity to educate others on what being mixed is. Regardless, it does mean something that he became president. It means the future is definitely bright. 23

MIXED

REPRESENTATI IN THE MEDIA. 24

ION

Now, there are TV shows like Mixed-ish, and that’s really exciting! Growing up, I watched shows aimed toward black kids and shows aimed toward white kids, but never anything in the middle. Now we have a show specifically for mixed people!? That’s amazing. There are lots more mixed-race celebrities too, and ones that proudly identify as mixed. Halle Berry is a great example. She’s talked to the media several times about what it was like for her growing up as a mixed kid and how she handles her own kids’ race with them, and that’s awesome. In our current society, there’s more of an open dialogue about race in general, so conversations like these are definitely really great. America is a melting pot. There’s so much culture here, and I’m sure there will continue to be lots of mixed families, so mixed representation in the media can only grow from here. 25

MIXED LIFE.

All of the previously talked about elements

There’s nothing wrong with being part of a

make up the everyday life of a mixed

group of people, because most of the time,

person. A lot of us go through the world

that’s a really good thing. The main thing

wondering where our place is, sometimes

to be mindful of is not letting what social

feeling like we need to fit ourselves into

and cultural groups you belong to define

some sort of category, and maybe iden-

you. It’s important to take a step back

tifying as “mixed” does just that. Really,

every so often and remember that you’re

though, every person is unique despite

an individual. We’re all individuals. When

the—as I like to describe them—little

we start to think like that, then these gaps

boxes we all are placed into and also put

between groups of people don’t feel so far.

our own selves into. 26

“We’re all individuals. When we start to think like that, then these gaps between groups of people don’t feel so far.”

I think a lot of â&#x20AC;&#x153;mixed lifeâ&#x20AC;? has to do with that sort of thinking. Being mixed causes you to, oftentimes, be in the middle of several different things, and so you start to think about why all of these things are equally valid as one another. You stop and realize that everyone is similar and unique at the same time. Because of that, I make an effort to appreciate where others are coming from and how they process the world around them. That is probably a big part of what being mixed brings to my life.

MIXED CONCLU In the end, life for me will definitely always be mixed. Mixed feelings, mixed drinks, mixed experiences and, of course, mixed heritage. Being mixed exposes you to so many different ways to live life. There are more mixed people out there than I could even begin to count. As time progresses, I’m excited to see how the world welcomes more mixed people into it. Life is different for everyone, and I think that’s what I really want to communicate with this book. Stop and think before you make an immediate judgment about someone. Being mixed has made me assume much less when it comes to other people.

If there’s anything to take away from this little book, it’s that every human being is unique. Our experiences are unique, as are our backgrounds and our outlooks on life. Think about that before trying to apply everything to your view of things.

It has also made me look at situations

Everything out there isn’t “black or white.”

from a less biased perspective.

Sometimes—like me—it’s both.

SION.

THIS IS MIXED.