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every other week from pier to peak

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anta Barbara, celebrated the world over as a vacation paradise, planted by the Gods of Commerce ’twixt mountain and sea, is awash in crap. What can one say? Everyday, Life breathes, eats, procreates and eliminates waste product – and roughly in that order. In a tourist-dependent Shangri-La like Santa Barbara, all that denuded filet mignon and blue-ribbon wine has to get out



by Jeff Wing done in collaboration with

of sight and out of mind as quickly and efficiently as possible, and anymore it’s considered déclassé to simply dump it into the ocean. Thus, Santa Barbara’s El Estero Wastewater Treatment Plant, which, despite its name, is not an estuary. Graceful long-necked birds do not dip their heads in cooling, fragrant waters here. But this loose collection of oddly shaped buildings, ...continued p.32




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A SY M P O S I U M – F E B R UA RY 2 1 T 0 2 3 , 2 0 1 4 P R E S E N T E D BY PAC I F I C A G R A D UAT E I N ST I T U T E

The Art and Transformative Psychology of C.G. Jung’s Red Book After a long period of self-reflection and experimentation, which he called “confrontation with the unconscious” The Red Book emerged from Jung’s psyche, with elaborate calligraphy and beautiful illustrations drawn by his own hand. In 2009, after decades in the family vault, the book was expertly digitized and published. Now, five years later, The Red Book continues to captivates our imagination. This weekend symposium will bring together Jungian analysts, scholars, and artistic thinkers—many of whom were key figures in the book’s publication— for critical and creative dialogues about Jung’s contributions to science, religion, psychology, art, and perception. The weekend will begin with an opening reception for an exhibition of limited-edition fine art prints from The Red Book.

“The years I pursued the inner images were the most important time of my life. Everything else is derived from this.” —C.G. Jung, 1957

The Symposium will be held on Pacifica’s Ladera Lane Campus. For information or registration visit or call 805.969.3626, ext. 103

A N E X H I B I T I O N O F F I N E A RT P R I N TS – F E B R UA RY 2 4 T 0 A P R I L 4 , 2 0 1 4

C.G. Jung’s Red Book: Masterworks for the Modern Age The public is invited to view this exhibition of fine art prints digitized directly from the original pages of C.G. Jung’s Red Book. The exhibition will run from February 24 to April 4, 2014 at Pacifica Graduate Institute, 801 Ladera Lane in Santa Barbara. Images above from THE RED BOOK by C.G. Jung. Used by permission of W. W. Norton & Company. Inc. | 805.969.3626, ext. 103



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Mission & State – Jeff Wing turned in a pretty sh***y cover story for us this week, and we think it’s great. We mean, it really stinks, and we love it. Seriously, it’s a big turd, and we couldn’t be happier with it. Okay, enough; Jeff went to the lowest point in Santa Barbara to investigate what happens to our collected waste for this enlightening write-up. Thanks, Jeff. Solid piece… (Also, there are poop jokes!)


 azza’s Missive - It sounds like EIC Matt had a great time climbing walls at Santa Barbara M Rock Gym, despite getting beaten badly by children. And he leaves a true Shyamalan-style twist for the very end of his Stuff I Like: He was in Belize the whole time.

P.6 P.7 P.9

It’s Crimetime – Here’s your biweekly dose of drunks, thieves and cyclists on meth! Letters to the Editor – Honestly, it’s mostly controversy orbiting Weekly Capitalist Jeff Harding and his darned opinions. Some other things too, but mostly just that. T he Beer Guy – We’re looking forward to Pure Order Brewing Co.’s debut at the upcoming Santa Barbara Beer Garden, but we’re equally intrigued by this grain juice and bourbon cocktail Zach describes. Na zdravi, indeed!

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15 Days a Week – The Department of Calendaring is back with another play-promoting, grubgrabbing, Valentine’s Day-delving, music-mentioning 15-day calendar.

Santa Barbara View – What’s going on over at Franklin? How can we market alcohol more responsibly? SB View tackles these questions and more this bi-week. Presidio Sports – Barry and John bring the shot-putting, cycling and basketball goodness. They also share a couple Athletes of the Week.

Pump It – If Jenny Schatzle can commit and follow through with her column every other week, then you can commit and follow through with your nutrition and workouts. No excuses. Girl About Town – It seems Julie Bifano witnessed a murder at Chuck’s Waterfront Grill, but don’t worry; it was of the interactive dinner theater variety. Food File – Food-person Christina Enoch introduces us to Aparna Khanolkar, a counselor, chef and speaker who can change the way you eat. American Girl – Tommie Vaughn’s got housing problems. You’ll figure it out, Tommie, so don’t worry. And, hey, if you don’t, Mac McGill can show you where to sleep. Man About Town – Mark Léisuré kicks around town and gives us the lowdown on all the events that are sure to rock. From film fest to stage shows to tunes, he’s got it all here.

Shop Girl – Kateri Wozny chronicles her trip to visit Lynn Davis, owner of Hummingbird Boutique on Santa Claus Lane. Mad Science – Our in-house science nerd Rachelle Oldmixon makes some splashy poop puns in her article about football, of all things – and she didn’t even know about our cover story this week! We call that Sentinel Synergy. (Sentergy? Doesn’t matter.)


In the Garden with Mr. Greenjeans – With draught conditions looming, Mr. Greenjeans thought it best to forgo the exciting talk of his pea plants in order to cover some important water-saving tips.

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Commercial Corner – These two dudes seem to know what they’re talking about when it comes to real estate, and we love their fancy real estate agent neckties. Lookin’ sharp, guys! Keepin’ It Reel – In this installment, we find a rather defeatist Mr. Luksic already bemoaning the Oscars loss of his Best Pic pick to one of two inferior films. He then admits to falling in love – Joaquin Phoenix-style – with Scarlett Johansson’s disembodied voice. He also says that he loved, loved, loved That Awkward Moment. Are we reading you right, James?

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You Have Your Hands Full – Hair it is: Mara Peters endures the joy of reliving puberty through her bevy of boys.

Santa Barbara Skinny – New trends for 2014: Synthetic materials! Factory farm to processing plant to freezer to fast food joint dining! Custom corncob holders! All lies, of course, so flip through and find out the real deal. (Except for that last one. Could be true, why not?)


Elevator Pitch – Grant Lepper turns in a tale about Digifit, an app that helps track all kinds of fitness stats. Thanks, Grant, keep ‘em coming.

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MAZZA’S  MISSIVE by Matt Mazza



ablo Hammack is a cool kid. He’s twelve years old, a seventh grader at Anacapa School, and I’d venture to say that the uniquely experiential curriculum at the independent college prep is doing him quite well. Pablo’s bright, engaging and precocious, well-mannered and yet still funny and conversational. He’s long for his age, lanky, weighing in at a mere 84 pounds. He likes to “surf and skate” and probably does lots of other things that twelve-yearold boys (young men?) like to do. But none of that is why I wanted to meet Pablo. Pablo, you see, also likes to do at least one thing that not every twelve-year-old does. He climbs rocks. He climbs rocks so well, in fact, that he will be competing in the USA Climbing National Championships in Colorado Springs later this month. That’s a big deal. And I wanted a shot at the title.

Looks hard, I know. And trust me, it’s harder than it looks.

The man, Pablo Hammack, looking casual on another overhanging ascent that left me baffled.

A Rock Rookie, Really

I met Pablo and his folks, Tom Winder and Danielle Hammack, at Santa Barbara Rock Gym, a spot frequented by

the young climber but one that I hadn’t had the pleasure of really checking out. To be honest, I thought I knew what to expect at the Rock Gym. I had preconceived notions of stereotypical hot shot climbers and cliquey little groups of uber outdoorsytypes decked out in Patagonia from head to foot using words like “belay” and “smearing” and “dyno” and “flash.” Words that we outsiders don’t understand. Words that we outsiders can’t understand.

As it turned out, however, my expectations about what I would find at the gym, as is often the case when one makes wide-ranging assumptions about a large and diverse group, were completely and utterly wrong. That was crystal clear the moment I walked through the door and was greeted by Mike O’Connor. Mike works at the Rock Gym, and coaches Pablo and the rest of the Santa Barbara Rock Gym Climbing Team. ...continued p.14

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...with the SBPD

A variety of crimes are committed every day in Santa Barbara; most of these crimes are petty but they do offer a window into if not the soul of the perpetrator, at least his or her thought process. Our following (and totally unsolicited) thoughts, observations and comments are put forth for your consideration.

Goldilocks and the Three Beers?


rather seriously drunken 23-year-old local man was unable to remember his own address after being discovered, probably by a family of anthropomorphic bears, around 3:45am one otherwise ordinary morning, sleeping in a stranger’s bed in a stranger’s house. It’s unclear whether the porridge was hot or cold or the La-Z-Boy was broken, but apparently the bed was just right.

Cyclists Aren’t Just Meth Freaks, They’re Lying Criminals Too If you’ve spent any time reading this garbage – sorry, this column – then you know about the conspiracy of local cyclists colluding to transport, sell and often consume shockingly large amounts of methamphetamines. (Indeed, these very dastardly folks – who often pose as fitness freaks in tight outfits – were even mentioned in the Letters to the Editor section this week, so it is now officially common knowledge and thus axiomatic that all cyclists are in fact meth freaks.) These outlaws are often busted by the local fuzz after being stopped for one of a zillion laws on the books that govern night bike riding requirements. Well, add another racket to the file for these dangerous criminals: Boldly lying to police officers. Just a few days ago, SBPD stopped a 42-year-old cyclist a few minutes after midnight for – you guessed it – riding a bike at night without a functioning rear reflector or light. (That’s a serious crime, by the way, one with many victims that must be constantly policed by sophisticated teams of highly specialized agents.) The rider told officers his “name,” but just couldn’t find his identification to prove he was who he said he was. And those highly specialized officers – probably convinced they’d find meth on the guy due to dozens of other similar stops – weren’t believing him. Not even for a second.

Publisher • Tim Buckley | Editor-in-Chief • Matt Mazza Design/Production • Trent Watanabe Contributing Partners Opinion • | Sports • Santa Barbara Skinny • Columnists Shop Girl • Kateri Wozny | You Have Your Hands Full • Mara Peters Plan B • Briana Westmacott | The Dish • Wendy Jenson Journal Jim • James Buckley | Real Estate • Michael Calcagno Commercial Corner • Austin Herlihy | The Weekly Capitalist • Jeff Harding Man About Town • Mark Leisure | In The Garden • Randy Arnowitz The Beer Guy • Zach Rosen | The Mindful Word • Diana M. Raab Girl About Town • Julie Bifano | In The Zone • Jeremy Harbin Mad Science • Rachelle Oldmixon | Keepin’ It Reel • James Luksic Pump It • Jenny Schatzle | Faces Of Santa Barbara • Patricia Clarke Photographer • Wendi Mazza | Stylin’ & Profilin’ • Megan Waldrep Howlin’ at the Moon • Joseph Timmons | Food File • Christina Enoch Advertising/Sales Tanis Nelson 805.689.0304 • Sue Brooks 805.455.9116 • Judson Bardwell 619.379.1506 • Published by SB Sentinel, LLC PRINTED BY NPCP INC., SANTA BARBARA, CA Santa Barbara Sentinel is compiled every other Friday 133 EAST DE LA GUERRA STREET, #182, Santa Barbara 93101 How to reach us: 805.845.1673 • E-MAIL:

CRIMETIME QUOTES OF THE BI-WEEK “I’m going to [bleep] you up. Then I’m going to [bleep] your wife up.” - An intoxicated 60-year-old homeless man to a bus station employee who wouldn’t allow him on a bus for free. Hmmm, wonder why he wouldn’t just let him ride? Seems like such a nice guy.

“I don’t want to talk to you, [bleep]. [Bleep] you.” - We don’t think that’s what officers were looking for when they asked this 65-year-old local woman who to contact in case of emergency after they found her passed out on a downtown bench at 10:15pm one night. But we’ve been wrong before. Good thing for good cops. Eventually they figured out the man’s real identity and, while he wasn’t a meth-crazed lunatic, he did have multiple warrants for his arrest. And so it was. Somewhere within the wild criminal conduct described above, there is crystal clear message: Be vigilant, citizens of Santa Barbara. Those cyclists just can’t be trusted.

Drunken Westsider Blows It Repeatedly A 53-year-old Santa Barbara man was unable to stop himself from interfering with City workers as they poured concrete in front of his Westside house. After multiple warnings, he (again) emerged from his house and “placed an item in the drying concrete.” Guess what? He was drunk. (We know. Shocker.) It was 2:45pm on a weekday. (No job? We know. Shocker. Er, ah, tough economy.)

The Clothes Dryer Bandit We’re not going soft over here at Crimetime, rest assured, but we have taken a break from the undisputedly icky homeless drinking problem that is on display each and every day on a sidewalk or in a park near you. That’s not to say that the problem has disappeared; it hasn’t. In fact, in only the past week or two alone, we’ve seen reports of drunken transient folks huddling in bushes taking drugs, falling down in the street in traffic, attempting break ins, threatening Cottage Hospital staff, urinating on the window of a downtown restaurant (during business hours!)… you know, pretty typical Crimetime fodder. But even so, leaving that aside, we’ve also come across at least one transient arrest that is pretty tough. Pretty tough indeed. A 48-year-old homeless man was detained around 8:30pm during one of the recent (but admittedly not very hard) rains, after he was found in an apartment complex laundry room drying his damp clothes and blanket. He even admitted to using the same room to “freshen up” earlier the same day. It’s really too bad, the guy was just trying to dry out (in the literal sense) and clean up (ditto). But aren’t there places homeless folks can go to do this? Aren’t there service providers that can help? Do folks have to go breaking an entry to dry a blanket in the damned rain? And do we have to arrest them for that? (We do, actually, it’s still trespassing and if we let it slide then it’ll just be a homeless laundry free-for-all extravaganza.) Life sure ain’t fair sometimes, folks, there’s just no denying it.

Using the Whole Fist There, Doc? A 48-year-old local man was arrested for an outstanding warrant. During the ensuing strip search at the police department, officers discovered a plastic zip-lock baggie “between his buttocks” stuffed with black tar heroin and meth. You couldn’t pay us enough to join the force. I mean, come on, do they teach this stuff at the academy? Ponch and John never checked butts, that’s for sure.  

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Although you might not believe it, we actually want to hear from you. So if you have something you think we should know about or you see something we've said that you think is cretinous (or perspicacious, to be fair), then let us know. There's no limit on words or subject matter, so go ahead and let it rip to: Santa Barbara Sentinel, Letters to the Editor, 133 East De La Guerra Street, No. 182, Santa Barbara, California 93101. You can also leap into the 21st century and email us at

S(O)B Bicyclists


i Matt, I enjoy your publication, and just had to write to let you know how much I loved – LOVED – Loretta Redd’s recent article on bicyclists. (Auto Sanctity and Cycle Sanity, Vol. 3, Issue 3.) Every time I drive downtown I see bicyclists blatantly disregarding traffic signs and lights, and running right through crosswalks dodging pedestrians! One recent Sunday on State Street there was a group of bicycle riders strung out one behind the other blatantly disregarding every traffic law imaginable with little or no regard to safety or people. No wonder many drivers are p.o.’d at bicyclists. And where are the cops? There used to be a bicycle patrol. I remember once actually seeing an old lady who had to stop in a crosswalk for one of those wannabe circus balancing act riders. You know the type – the ones who just can’t stop weaving and balancing to keep in motion even when perched at a stop. He had crossed the line and was weaving and bobbing to keep his balance. She stepped around him, hesitating, then

hobbled on. Then, like a wicked little kid, she turned around – the timing was perfect and he was looking the other way – and pushed him over! How I wish I had the courage to do something like that, when these inconsiderate ingrates do something like that. Teach them a lesson, like Loretta said, the hardest thing about riding is the asphalt. Templar Shields Santa Barbara (Editor’s Note: Wow, Templar, I can really feel your passion (dangerous obsession?) on the issue. Maybe you should tone that aggression down just a touch; no need going around and pushing our spandex-donning friends down. (Lots of them are fit as fiddles, by the way, so consider that one of them might actually get back up, chase you down and pummel you relentlessly with his or her helmet or bike pump or whatever. Not worth it. And hey man, keep it peaceful.) Funny anecdote. My family and I live on a major road bike route (there are lots of mountain bikers too, but they keep it ...continued p.36

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by Zach Rosen

The Birth of a Brewery: Brewing Pure Order Batch #001 James adds the yeast. Visit our main production facility and taproom at: 45 Industrial Way Buellton, CA 93427 • (805) 694-2252

Or if you’re in Santa Barbara, visit our new tasting room in the Funk Zone at: 137 Anacapa St., Suite F, Santa Barbara, CA 93101 • (805) 694-2255



t’s not every day that a brewery opens up in Santa Barbara. In fact, cousins James and David Burge can tell you that it takes many days to open up a brewery. These two have nevertheless jumped over all of the hurdles, navigated the bureaucracy and, after several years of work, Pure Order Brewing Co. is set to open in mid-March. I recently joined them for their very first brew day. For Batch #001, James and David brewed Crooked Neck Hefeweizen, named in honor of the SB Zoo’s beloved giraffe, Gemina. They had to brew this beer first in order for it to be ready for the Santa Barbara Beer Garden. This event (designed by none other than yours truly) will be held on Saturday, February 22, at the Santa Barbara Botanic Garden and pairs beers with different sections of the gardens. This festival will be the first time Pure Order’s beer will ever be served to the public. So let’s get to it.

SERVING FOOD BY THE LUCKY PENNY Zach Rosen is a Certified Cicerone® and beer educator living in Santa Barbara. He uses his background in chemical engineering and the arts to seek out abstract expressions of beer and discover how beer pairs with life.

The Mash

I arrived at Pure Order (410 North Quarantina Street) to find that Kevin Pratt, brewmaster of Santa Barbara Brewing Co, had already joined the fun. (Kevin has spent the past few months helping James and David get their brewery set up.) When I got there, they had just finished the mash and were beginning to sparge the wort. Now if that sentence doesn’t make any sense then here is a little background on brewing. Mashing is the first main step of brewing. Grain and hot water are blended in a vessel called the mash tun. During this time, the warm water activates enzymes in the grain that begin to break down the long, clunky starches into the smaller, more digestible sugars. This process usually lasts one or two hours.

Weekly Happenings in Santa Barbara:




James Burge adds a pitcher of hops to the wort on Pure Order’s very first brew day.

The sugary liquid produced during this step is called wort. The liquid is not considered “beer” until it contains yeast (which is added in the fermenter). The wort is allowed to drain from the mash ...continued p.24 expires 3/21/14

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15•Days• a•Week We Ain’t Got Nothin’ But Love, Babe…

by Jeremy Harbin

Want to be a part of Fifteen Days A Week?

Space is limited, but if you have an event, exhibit, performance, book signing, sale, opening, trunk show or anything else interesting or creative that readers can attend, let us know at 805-845-1673 or email us at We’ll consider all suggestions, but we will give extra consideration to unusual events and/or items, especially those accompanied by a good visual, particularly those that have yet to be published.

Saturday February 8

Theatre Everywhere

The Elements Theatre Collective kicked off its latest production last night at the Piano Kitchen (430 Rose Avenue) and continues tonight in the same location at 8pm. King of Shadows is an urban thriller by Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa. It’s about a young runaway who thinks a monster is trying to track him down and the people that come to his aid. It received a favorable review from Variety. Go to to reserve your free tickets and to check out the full schedule that has the collective staging the show at several places around town – like Avelina Wine Company, the library and DiviniTree – until February 23.

Sunday February 9

8 Days a Week

The Plaza Playhouse Theater (4916 Carpinteria Avenue) began its Beatles Invasion Weekend last night with a talk with Beatles expert Dennis Mitchell and a performance by Beatles cover band The Tearaways. But if you can only attend one night of this Beatlemania retrospective, tonight should be it. Alan Parsons, who, at the beginning of his successful career on both sides of the glass, engineered Abbey Road, will take the stage at 3:30pm for a Q&A with Mitchell. Afterward, there will be a screening of the full Ed Sullivan Show episode that the Beatles first appeared on 50 years ago today. Tickets for today cost $12. Find them at

Monday February 10 Red Flags

We officially declare today Go Downtown And Get Something Done That You’ve Been Meaning To Go Downtown And Get Done Day. While you’re there, notice the red flags along State Street. They’ve been placed there to raise awareness of heart disease, the work of the American Heart Association and National Heart Month. The flags will be up until February 16.

Tuesday February 11

Good Grubbin’

could go listen to Dr. Two-First-Names and the band Animal Liberation Orchestra, which will be there for a Q&A sesh, at 2pm for free, or you could just get the answer here: nothing. You can’t really do anything with a music degree, except for maybe be in a band, but you could have done that right after high school anyway. Or… maybe you could go to grad school and try to teach? You’ll figure it out, man, don’t worry; you’re in your early 20s and have all the time in the world. Anyways, we’ll take that cappuccino to go, please. Thanks, man.

Friday February 14

Valentine’s Day

Happy couples: Consider heading to the Finch & Fork (31 West Carrillo Street) in the Canary Hotel for a three-course couples’ dinner they’re offering today and tomorrow. Or get weird with the hotel’s “Room for Romance” package that includes in-tub dining. Go to finchandforkrestaurant. com or call 805.879.9100.

A Bouncy Debut

For a completely different Valentine’s Day activity, you should check out the Grand Opening of Santa Barbara’s newest fitness concept slash all ages fun zone slash trampoline park. Did we say newest? I think we meant only. Opening today at 4pm and keeping the bouncing going until midnight, Cloud 10 Jump Club (187 South Turnpike) will debut its various attractions, including a 40-foot long trampoline half-pipe; a huge, open “jump court” made of many trampolines; a “top flight” court for advanced students of the trampoline arts; a bouncy basketball court; and a dodgeball court made of solid wood. Kidding! It’s made of trampolines! They’ve got fitness classes for adults and classes for the kiddos. They’ve got a special play structure just for the little ones. They do private parties. If you get hungry, they’ve got The Peanut Lounge, where you can get a salad, sandwich or slice of pizza. Check out www. for more information.

It’s Tuesday again. If you’re anything like us, you’re already tired. So go to bed early and wake up refreshed for tomorrow. Just kidding! Go down to Dargan’s (18 East Ortega Street) for a pint and some authentic pub grub. We’ve been going in early for the delicious, inexpensive lunch menu. See you there!



Darla Bea Mine

February 12 Color Haven

When your annual Lincoln’s Birthday celebration winds down this evening, you have the option of heading to the Hospice of Santa Barbara (2050 Alameda Padre Serra, Suite 100) for an open house and Color Haven, an exhibition of artworks by Tana Sommer, from 5:30 to 7pm. There will also be wine, refreshments and music by classical guitarist Theresa Ogella-Lopez. For more information, call 805.563.8820 or go to

Thursday February 13

Existentialism 101

This panel today in UCSB’s Geiringer Hall, according to music department professor Jon Nathan, will answer the question, “What the heck can you do with a music degree after college?” So you

February 15

This post-Valentine’s Day Valentine’s-themed party at Muddy Waters (508 East Haley Street) called For the Love of House! is sure to get the blood of all area “house heads” pumping. While we have to admit that we don’t really know the difference between house, techno and drum ‘n’ bass, we’re pretty sure they all sound something like OOM-CHK OOM-CHK OOM-CHK OOM-CHK. Does that make sense? Maybe it’s just one of those things you have to hear with your ears rather than read on the page. Let Rene, DJ Level, Vikas, DJ Darla Bea, Force Placement, Tony Fuze and DJ R.E.I.L. elucidate the distinction for you tonight from 7pm until closing time.

Sunday February 16

Valentine’s Tunes

Make it three days of Valentine’s by attending A Valentine Delight: Music for Two Flutes & Piano today at Trinity Episcopal Church (1500 State Street) at 3:30pm. Because nothing says “Valentine’s” like church, pass the afternoon to the sweet sounds of this instrumental trio. It’s free.

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Happy Birthday G.W.

Going Ballistic

February 17


February 20

If Lincoln’s Birthday slipped past you before you had a chance to pause and perform traditional Lincoln Day rituals, rejoice! You have yet another chance to celebrate a dead president’s birthday today. George Washington was a guy with a wig and wooden teeth and he could not tell a lie (or was that Lincoln?). Today, by act of Congress, we celebrate his birth. A good place to do so is the Natural Café. If you read last week’s cover story, you know that President Washington loved eating healthy; in fact, his favorite meal was a Buddha Burrito. Natural Café has three locations around town, but our favorite is the one at 508 State Street.

Today’s a perfect day to check out the Wall Space Gallery’s (116 East Yanonali Street) current exhibit if you haven’t already. It’s called Internal Ballistics, and it features the bullet-themed photography of Deborah Bay and Sabine Pearlman. Why is today the perfect day for that? Because you’ll need to take in the work in advance of tomorrow’s reception, from 6 to 8pm, and Saturday’s artist talk, from 2 to 3pm. The gallery is open Tuesday through Saturday from 11am to 5pm and on Sunday from noon to 5pm. Go to for more information.



Food and Music

Agree To Disagree

February 18

February 21

It’s Tuesday, a great day to get out and see some live music. Take yourself straight to SOhO Restaurant and Music Club (1221 State Street) this evening, and take advantage of both parts of the establishment’s name. Restaurant: Grab a table and try something from the organic menu, like the free-range chicken breast or the wild boar shank. Music Club: Enjoy the triple bill of singer-songwriters Michael McGeehee, John Brandoli and Grover Anderson. Doors are at 6:30pm and the show costs $8. Visit for more information.


The Agreeables are a band that purports to “save the world one melody at a time.” Hah, yeah… right, Agreeables. If that were true, we wouldn’t have OBAMA up there in his oval office signing executive orders BYPASSING CONGRESS AND THE CONSTITUTION and the Republicans on Capitol Hill getting fat on OUR DIME. (If you’d like to see more generic, uninformed, apropos-of-nothing political ranting in 15 Days, send an email to; no word limit.) See The Agreeables try to save the world tonight with their original rock tunes and classic cover songs from 6 to 8pm at Carr Winery (414 North Salsipuedes Street). It’s free. Check the band out at


February 19 Funny Stuff

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February 22

Consider tonight’s Arts & Lectures event an investment in your future: A few years from now, when one of these Second City performers is famous, you’ll be able to tell people again and again about the time you saw them long ago, before everybody knew about them. The legendary Chicago comedy troupe has given many name comedians their start, like Bill Murray, Stephen Colbert and Tina Fey. Tonight’s revue, Happily Ever Laughter, will feature sketches, song and improv. It happens tonight at 8pm in UCSB’s Campbell Hall. Tickets start at $25 and can be purchased by calling 805.893.3535 or by logging on to

A Great Joke

Heavenly Bodies at the Santa Barbara Museum of Art? Must be an exhibit about the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue, right? RIGHT?! Get it? You guys, do you get it?! Is anybody reading this calendar?! (And if so, why hasn’t the whole 15 Days team been hired by Jimmy Kimbels or J. Leno yet?) Alright, let’s get serious: It’s a photographic exhibit of works from the nineteenth century to today about art and science and technology and all that good stuff like that. It opens today and runs until May 25. Find the museum at 1130 State Street. It’s open Tuesday through Sunday from 11am to 5pm. 

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Santa Barbara’s Online Magazine, Published Twice Daily

Can A Principal Really Make A Difference? At Franklin, The Answer Is A Resounding Yes! by Sharon Byrne


asie Kilgore first appeared on my radar when my daughter was in Santa Barbara Junior High. Then-principal John Becchio related that the kids coming out of Franklin Elementary were better prepared than they’d ever been, and he credited that to their principal, Casie Kilgore. I ran into her repeatedly when the Milpas Community Association was starting up, this engaged, energetic character leading a crew of children to community events. I was impressed.  When Franklin Elementary dominated the Milpas Holiday Parade, I was really impressed. I learned that Franklin had a super-engaged PTA, loads of interesting programs for the kids, and a commitment to be a strong part of the community.  Then they made the news for raising their test scores significantly, and Casie had to kiss a pig. That was the promise she made to the students. Clearly, here’s a rock-star principal in action, and I wanted to know more about her.

Challenging the Status Quo


asie came to the career of principal via a very circuitous route, but one that prepped her precisely for this role. Call it kismet. She was supposed to be a CPA and take over her parents’ accounting business. She grew up in Santa Barbara and learned Spanish studying in Mexico. But instead of heading off to accounting land, she got into migrant education in Watsonville and had her eyes opened. She realized she wanted to light a spark in the kids. So that put her on the path into a career in education. Casie admits she is not a patient woman. She won’t tolerate status quo if it means enabling a broken system. So one of her first jobs as principal was getting rid of sympathy-empathy between staff and parents that enabled poor performance. Often, staff would throw their hands in the air when presented with excuses

Sharon Byrne

Sharon Byrne is executive director for the Milpas Community Association, and currently serves on the Advisory Boards for the Salvation Army Hospitality House and Santa Barbara County Alcohol and Drug Problems. children. Casie believes that if you can make a change in the direction of a kid’s life, the place to do it is in elementary school. That is where the foundation is built for the kind of person he or she is going to be in life. Character traits are set here. She wanted to give Franklin kids ganas, a Spanish term that means grit, stamina, courage. Life is going to throw you curveballs. Ganas keeps you from getting knocked sideways when they hit. The demographic Franklin serves may be one that is traditionally associated with under-performing schools, but that doesn’t mean it has to be that way. Casie set up a new system of beliefs:

Franklin School dedication plaque.

for tardiness, truancy, lack of student preparation, poor work habits, etc. What can we do? These poor parents, they’re working so hard. We can’t expect much of them… Casie used her extensive community connections to apply pressure deftly. “Wednesday is your one day off? And you went to the casino… but you could have come and had lunch with your child.” The message is clear: make better choices and put your kid first. Everyone needs to be accountable, Casie believes. The student has a responsibility. So does staff. So do parents. There should be no excuses as to why these kids can’t make it to the moon. Everyone is on the hook for that. This culture change became contagious. Parents would nudge other parents and say, “You don’t want to miss that PTA meeting” or “You really need to be at the Holiday Recital. It’s important to your child.” Franklin had created an involved parent base, a linchpin in the school’s transformation from an under-performing school.

A Staff Invested in Their Students


third of the staff at Franklin with children or grandchildren enrolled them in the school, including Casie. That creates a personal and emotional investment to make Franklin successful. Other staff members reside out of the district and are not eligible to enroll their

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Franklin ICAN team in the Milpas Holiday Parade.

1. Kids can learn here. 2. They can go to junior high, well prepared, from Franklin. 3.  They can knock the socks off the test scores.   Staff needed to face a classroom with the understanding that there is college material sitting in those chairs. These kids can succeed.  But not only staff beliefs would need to be altered. Casie wanted to change the way the kids think about school. She

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realized they needed something beyond academics to connect them to school and anchor them here. For Casie, that was sports as a child. For Franklin kids, there’s an array of enrichment programs like art, music, cheerleading, football and break-dancing. Many kids are at Franklin from 7:30am until 5pm. It is a second home for them. Enrichment programs give kids a release, and connect them socio-emotionally to school. Franklin will be a pilot site for Restorative Justice next year. The restorative principles are already fairly aligned with Franklin’s culture: take responsibility for your feelings and actions. Make sure you have a toolbox so you can handle life. Teach kids how to learn from mistakes, rather than throw the book at them, turning them off school forever.

Learning to Navigate the School System: Start at the End First


etting a kid through school now entails starting at the end and working backward. If your kid wants to be a film director, he or she needs to get into a great film school. So they need to go to a high school with a film/video program. Ditto for junior high. So get them into an elementary that emphasizes art. Same for sports and engineering, among others. That means thinking about the right high school programs… for kids in elementary school! Instead of drifting along through school, possibly getting turned off and dropping out, Casie wants kids to think about steps they need to take to achieve their dreams. Find out what they’re interested in now and help them connect to it. Dreaming of being a big football star? Franklin has a football team and a cheerleading squad. Like gaming? Hey, you could design games! There’s this great school in L.A. that will train you. Maybe you’d like to learn computers now so you can go to college there.  Connecting them to their interests early helps kids navigate to their social groups by shared passions, rather than letting them just fall into existing social structures that could end up limiting them.  Franklin is one of only three schools in California that has the Incredible Children’s Art Network (ICAN), which provides high-quality art and music instruction for 90 minutes every other week. ICAN also provides afterschool lessons for 80 kids, who rotate through learning the cello, violin, voice and orchestra. Interested kids can move forward in the program after the basic enrichment course is completed. Artwork from ICAN decorates the Community Policing Center on the Eastside.

Loretta Redd’s diverse background includes being a psychologist, business owner, non-profit director, Air Force officer, writer, speaker, and executive coach. Loretta has served on several Santa Barbara city committees and has been a candidate for public office.

Test Scores Tell an Interesting Story Casie notes that at the 2nd-grade level, Franklin’s standardized test scores are not optimal. But in the higher grades, the scores begin to rise markedly. The reason? “They’re exposed over time to the principles (and maybe principal) that produce better performance,” asserts Kilgore. “When they first start school, there’s a learning curve for them, and parents, on what it’s going to take to be successful. As they continue on at Franklin, hitting that bar becomes more and more normal, and they want to learn, they want to succeed and they’re equipped to do it.” While the ICAN program has been the newsmaker of recent note, I wanted to know why Franklin always has so many kids at our community events. She laughs. “You never know what they’ll be exposed to that will turn them on, and make them say, ‘I want to do that when I grow up!’” She also recognizes there’s a big social awakening with entering junior high. “You were part of a student body that was pretty demographically homogeneous, and suddenly you’re with kids from all backgrounds, and they don’t all look like you. It’s better to prep them now for that reality,” she says, smiling mirthfully. “What are the new rules for social media, for example? What’s okay for you to post? You have to hold onto your equilibrium on that bigger stage and not get knocked sideways.” She established the relationship with McDonald’s, linking school and business in a mutually beneficial partnership. Franklin dominates McTeacher Night fundraisers. McDonald’s hands out free backpacks to Franklin kids and hosts a beautiful mosaic, created by Franklin kids. Franklin hosts community events, like the SBPD Explorer’s Annual Menudo Festival and the Eastside Pedestrian/ Traffic Safety workshops, put on by the city. The school is emerging as a gathering center in the Eastside. This is a school on the rise, all right. It’s a great underdog story, and the team at Franklin – all of them – deserves a huge round of applause. “I love my job!” Casie exclaims. It absolutely shows.

Taking Pot Shots at Vodka Shots by Loretta Redd

“Quickly, bring me a beaker of wine, so that I may wet my mind and say something clever” – Aristophanes, early 400 B.C.


lcohol has been with us since its first unintentional fermentation ten thousand years ago. We might even credit the Catholic communion with originating “wine tastings,” but the societal and economic “punch” from alcohol has

Loretta Redd

grown stronger by the century. This is not a column about the evils of alcohol. But it is a “call to action” for those who believe a few taps on the brakes of marketing might be in order. Adults are going to drink – most for occasional pleasure, some to feed addiction, others to obliterate all sense of responsibility for their behavior. As long as someone is over 21 and doesn’t intend on getting behind the wheel of a car, I don’t care whether that person is opening a Montrachet Grand-Cru or Schlitz Malt Liquor. But the proliferation of availability, advertising, marketing and promotional items has our kids squarely in its crosshairs. While the United States doesn’t rank among the top ten per capita countries for alcohol consumption, there is an ever-increasing presence of beer, wine and distilled spirits in places never seen before. Like pharmacies. Maybe it gives alternative meaning to “drug” store, but when I was a child, you didn’t find the headache cause two aisles over from the headache remedy. And grocery stores. A few weeks ago, a local supermarket featured a cordonedoff, but very visible and inviting vodka promotion with free “mini-shot” tastings. And convenience stores. It is hard to find six inches of open space on the windows of most corner shops, even though our sign ordinance restricts signage to less than one-third of the window space. And once inside, there are tubs of ice with single cans, T-shirts, bottle openers, surf boards, moving displays and neon signs to further entice the buyer. And gas stations. With 22 DUI citations in December in Santa Barbara alone, you would think that promoting alcohol at the source of automotive fuel might be sending a bit of a mixed message about drinking and driving. To no one’s surprise, the higher the expenditure on marketing, the higher the sales. Given the advertising with professional sports, a teenage viewer could easily come to the conclusion that most football players and soccer stars are all in the bag by game time, and that the checkered flag of NASCAR means, “Gentlemen, pop your bottles... not your throttles.” Want to make a significant dent in underage drinking? Then reduce the amount of early exposure and you’ll

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target where addiction begins in 90 percent of cases, according to Santa Barbara’s SafeLaunch co-founder, Janet Rowse. A 2007 study at National Institutes of Health, which looked at the relationship between alcohol advertising, promotional items and adolescent alcohol use in more than 2,000 6th, 7th and 8th graders, verified that two-thirds of the kids who tried drinking had made weekly trips to where alcohol was on display. Those who had collected promotional items were three times more likely to have imbibed their favored brand. So in our local grocery store last month, while mommy went in search of peanut butter, the kids in tow were not only rolled past aisles and aisles of wine and liquor and cases and coolers of beer, but they were likely quite curious about that chained-off area where only the adults could go for their mini-shots of vodka. For me, it isn’t about the volume “served,” it’s about the method and the message it sends. Adults can reach their own conclusions about what makes alcohol among the top five causes of preventable death, with 2.5 million cumulative years of potential life lost (YLL), according to the Centers for Disease Control. Even with an economic cost to society in excess of $220 billion, including prevention, recovery, emergency rooms and policing, plus lost wages, productivity, lives and families. The hypocrisy of human behavior continues, as we attend wine-filled fundraisers for local sobriety programs, or collect $324 million in alcohol tax, to offset the billions in abuse. It remains a choice that adults can make, and certainly many adults do so responsibly. Alcohol isn’t going away – prohibition didn’t work, except to create a lot of jobs for the FBI and mafia. But what about the kids? Do we really need the convenience of having a source of liquor or wine within a half-mile of almost every home in Santa Barbara? Did you notice the prevalence of wine-related gifts this holiday season inferring the “spirit” of Christmas now comes in a bottle? You are the customer. You are also the parents and relatives of our youth, and pay the bill for their addictions. Here are three ways to help: Ask your local grocery store to cease the alcohol tasting programs in their stores; ask the owners or managers of corner markets and convenience stores to remove advertising for alcohol (trust me, it won’t slow sales); and when you see promotional items that would appeal to kids, have a gently thoughtful discussion with the manager or owner and ask for their removal. It may be too late to put this influence back in the bottle, but we don’t necessarily have to “wet our minds to have something clever to say.” 

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...continued from p.5 He’s a friendly, knowledgeable guy, 27 years old, and he’s been climbing for around seven years. He only recently moved to town from Baltimore and landed a job at the Rock Gym based primarily, I assume (I know, I’ve already been wrong once in this column), on his climbing ability and friendly approach. After I got the waivers signed – don’t worry, the whole climbing thing is safer than you think – and the special and moderately uncomfortable climbing shoes on, Mike took me back to one of the myriad climbing walls on offer. I’d beaten Pablo to the gym so I could squeeze in a practice run or two. “You’ll be bouldering today,” Mike started, “which means that you’ll work your way through a few problems and get up the wall without any ropes.” Problems? There’s that lingo thing-o rearing its ugly head. And I’m already lost. You know what? It’s better that I paraphrase here rather than spend the next thousand words trying to re-live the conversation between Mike and me. It’s important to get at least some of what he imparted out there, though, so here goes (real climbers may want to skip this, as I’m sure I’m butchering the intricacies of what is a very nuanced and challenging sport): Bouldering is a pretty unique combination of mental and physical fortitude. The climber has to figure out


“VFUN? But that’s not even on the scale you just told me about.” “Right, but it’s a good place to start.” We walked over to the route and I had a look. Mike coached me a bit and, honestly, I climbed right up it. No problem. Then we went to a V1. That was a bit more challenging and my forearms were already getting tired – even the simplest climb is strenuous – but I still made it. Then young Pablo showed up. Game time.

One Tough Kid

That’s young Duke Lettieri ascending another tough one I couldn’t even think about. (I’m telling you, these kids were impressive.)

how to ascend a designated route, with specific hand and foot holds marked by colored tape. Everything from the (often rather inconvenient) location and geometry of the holds to the pitch of the wall and the climber’s vertical and horizontal movements thereon change with each “problem,” some wildly more difficult than others. There is a rating system that begins with the easiest ascents at V0 and goes to the most difficult ascents at around V16. Sounds simple, right?

It isn’t. Here’s how it went between Mike and me after he explained the basics. “Ok, so, what then… I should start on like a V3?” I’m thinking something like, Hey I’m reasonably fit, let’s get going with a little challenge. Goal for the day is double digits, one of those V10s. No problem. “You know, let’s try this VFUN over here to get you going.” Mike was patient and polite, and he was probably thinking something like, Wow, this guy really has no idea what he’s talking about.

I spent a minute or two sizing up the competition and quickly determined that I could take him. He’s just a kid, I thought, I got this. As I internally gloated that I would soon best a national climbing championship contender – forget that he’s 26 years my junior – Pablo explained to me what it is that happens at these climbing competitions and how he came to make the National American Bouldering Series Championships. Again, I’ll paraphrase. Competitors are isolated in a room where they can neither see nor hear anything about the impending ascents. (They have not seen any diagrams or been given any clues, and are effectively blind ...continued p.20




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Powered by Presidio Sports is a provider of local sports news and information for the Santa Barbara community. Founded in 2008, the small team at Presidio has covered hundreds of local sporting events and published thousands of articles connected to Santa Barbara’s athletic community. Please visit their website for more local sports news and information.

Decorated Shot-putter Chooses UCLA

by Barry Punzal

Olympic silver-medal cyclist Dotsie Bausch is joined by Women and Girls in Sports Luncheon chairperson Catharine Manset, left, and Round Table president Laurie Leighty.

Stamatia Scarvelis signs her National Letter of Intent to compete for UCLA. The Dos Pueblos High School senior is flanked by principal Shawn Carey, throwing coach Kent Pagel, high school coach Chris Mollkoy and Dos Pueblos athletic director Dan Feldhaus.


tamatia Scarvelis will continue her track and field career at UCLA. The Dos Pueblos senior, a twotime defending CIF state champion, USA Track and Field Junior National Champion and Junior Pan American Games gold medalist, announced her college choice during halftime of last Friday’s Dos Pueblos-Santa Barbara boys basketball game. Stamatia pulled open her DP letterman’s jacket and showed the crowd the UCLA Bruins T-shirt she was wearing. She said her final decision came down to Oklahoma and UCLA. Stamatia will be joining her brother, Nicholas, at the Westwood campus next fall. The 2011 CIF state champion in the shot put is entering his sophomore season with the Bruins.

Olympic Cyclist Found Inner Strength to Turn Life Around In her long, painful journey back from a serious eating disorder that nearly killed her, London Olympics cycling silver medalist Dotsie Bausch learned about being true to herself. That meant having the courage to be imperfect and vulnerable. Bausch shared her story of learning to accept susceptibility and become more connected with herself and others during the annual Santa Barbara Athletic Round Table Women and Girls in Sports

Luncheon at Earl Warren Showgrounds. The event drew more than 400 female athletes from local high schools and colleges. It was during her many therapy sessions that Bausch learned to become comfortable with herself. “The courage that you need to be imperfect,” she said. “To me, it means, first and foremost, you absolutely have to be able to become vulnerable. I found great power and great solace out of a wretched near-death life in vulnerability. It truly shaped my whole road and who I am today.” Before she became a seven-time national cycling champion and an Olympian, Bausch suffered from anorexia and later bulimia and almost died. “I did go downhill really fast,” she recalled. “My skin turned grey, my teeth were turning black, my hair was falling out. I really had no vibrancy and no joy, no personality, no connection to people; I didn’t have an interest in anything. I was really truly dying from the inside out.” Learning to accept vulnerability helped in her recovery. “We have to allow ourselves to be seen to connect in relationships,” she said. “If we don’t strip off the barriers and take off the mask that so many of us are wearing, we can’t truly connect with each other because people can’t see us; they can’t see who we really are.” She pointed to shame and fear as the roadblocks to finding one’s true self.

She said fully embracing susceptibility would overcome the fear. “It’s the only way there. Not that it’s the comfortable thing or easy; it really isn’t. But it’s a necessity because we have to be willing to do things, and there’s no guarantee at the end of the road. Because if there was a guarantee, everyone would do it.” She challenged the young athletes in the room to “tow the line and risk losing to win, even if there are never guarantees. Get uncomfortable and don’t take greatness to the grave with you. What’s the worst that can happen?”

Athletes of the Week Jessie Jimenez of Dos Pueblos and Cate’s Caroline Montgomery stepped up to lead their respective teams to special victories last week. Their performances earned them Santa Barbara Athletic Round Table Athlete of the Week honors.

Cate School’s Caroline Montgomery

Jimenez assisted on the game-tying goal and scored the game-winner as Dos Pueblos beat Santa Barbara High, 2-1, at Peabody Stadium, handing the Dons their first Channel League loss in boys soccer, 2-1. Montgomery had a huge game in Cate’s 10-9 double-overtime win over perennial Tri-Valley League power

Dos Pueblos’ Jessie Jimenez

Malibu. She scored four goals, had seven steals and recorded a key blocked shot as the Rams beat the Sharks for the first time in eight years. She also scored eight goals in a 20-3 win over Nordhoff. Other female athletes nominated for the award were Sophie Maes (Cate water polo), Jordyn Lilly (Bishop Diego basketball), Hannah Rogers (Bishop Diego basketball), Ady Willet (Dos Pueblos soccer) and Shannon Cleary (Dos Pueblos water polo). The male honorable mention picks included Alan Williams (UCSB basketball), Geoffrey Acheampong (Cate soccer), Spenser Wyatt (Laguna Blanca basketball), Justin Bruce (SBCC baseball) and Rayshaun Moore (Carpinteria basketball). UCSB’s Williams was named the Big West Conference Player of the Week for the fourth time this season. Williams averaged 26.5 points, 15.0 rebounds, 1.5 steals and 1.5 blocks in victories over UC Irvine and UC Davis. In Saturday’s 82-67 tilt with Davis, Williams came through with the first 20-20 game of his career with 27 points and 20 rebounds. “Alan is amazingly productive and he is getting rewarded,” said UCSB head coach Bob Williams. “He was already

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Noah Burke and Santa Barbara High have won 17 straight Channel League games.

N.A.S.M, Kickboxing and SPIN Certified, Jenny Schatzle is known for changing bodies and changing lives. Her approach to fitness is about not only “getting fit” physically but also how, through exercise, nutrition and a positive motivational environment, you can change your lifestyle for the better. Jenny’s program and the results she consistently achieves have made her one of the most sought-after experts in Santa Barbara.

Commit and Follow Through


being recognized nationally, but 20 rebounds in a game really makes you take notice.”

Dons Clinch Channel League Title with Three Games to Play by John Dvorak The ball is rolling for Santa Barbara High’s boys basketball team, and it’s getting harder and harder to stop. The Dons won their 17th-straight Channel League game on Monday night, defeating visiting San Marcos 75-63 to clinch their second-straight league title with three games still to play. The Dons’ offense, averaging 76 points per game over their last three, was at it again. “We think we’re capable of doing that every game when we get out and run, because that’s our style,” said Dons center Jack Baker, who totaled 13 points, 21 rebounds and five blocks. Noah Burke scored a game-high 23 points while spearheading a break-neck pace and a suffocating press that had San Marcos looking uncomfortable all night. “It wasn’t the tempo we wanted,” said Royals head coach David Odell. “Basically we didn’t execute any of our game plan, so we just made it really hard on ourselves.” The game was close until Santa Barbara took off on a 16-2 run early in the second quarter. After Christian Widmer converted a three-point play in the final minute of the first quarter, the Royals went dry for five minutes. Bryce Ridenour finally broke the drought, but a 3-pointer by Bolden Brace on the next play put Santa Barbara up 36-16. Brace scored six of his eight points in the quarter and got the crowd going with a nice drive-and-dish to Chris Wagonhurst and a crossover move that badly fooled his defender.

“We finally had a big crowd and I was kind of feeling it, so I just kept shooting,” Brace said. The Royals’ best stretch came to close the first half. Scott Everman’s three-point play started an 11-3 run for the Royals that closed the gap before halftime. The first two baskets of the second half belonged to San Marcos, making it 39-31 when Elijah Johnson knocked down a 12-foot jumper on the baseline. After a Santa Barbara timeout, the Dons regrouped and pushed the lead back to 17. While the Royals again cut the lead down at the end of the quarter, the final period was dominated by the home team. The Dons led 72-48 at one point. Johnson – one of four Royals to score in double figures – led the team with 15 points. Widmer had 11, Ridenour 10 and Tyson Miller 10. It is the second Channel League title in head coach David Bregante’s three-year tenure. Bregante took over a team that had gone winless in league competition the year before. His first year, the Dons finished with a 7-5 record. They are 18-3 since. “We’ve come a long way. All the credit has to go to my assistant coaches and the kids for buying into what we’re trying to do,” Bregante said. “I’ve just been blessed. Great kids, great coaches, what can I say?” The two teams will complete the threegame season series on Thursday, February 13 at San Marcos in what will be the final regular-season game for both teams. Santa Barbara (19-2, 9-0) hosts Ventura in its next game on Wednesday while San Marcos (15-8, 4-5) travels to Dos Pueblos on Friday. Ventura was the last Channel League school to go undefeated in league play, doing it in 2010-11. “We still want to go 12-0. That’d be pretty cool to accomplish,” Baker said. 

hose are the words running through my head over and over, as parroted back to me by EIC Matt this week (in a mildly humorous tone, I think) after I was late with my column (again!). You know what they say, there’s a little truth in everything. And I’ve certainly had to talk with Mr. Mazza about committing and following through so I suppose I had it coming.  (Thanks Matt, there’ll be extra pop-ups for you in class next week.) Anyway, now it’s my turn to ask you to commit and follow through on your nutrition and workouts so you can see and feel the results. I could tell you – as I undoubtedly have – what I hear on a near-constant basis: “I’m too busy,” “I don’t have enough time,” or some other excuse. But that’s just what they are. Excuses. And you know what they say about excuses. Here are the two lessons I’d like to leave you with, and the core of this week’s column. First, commitment and follow through is a lifestyle choice, one I believe in and try very hard to follow (whether with fitness, work, friends, family or anything else). If I say I’m going to do something, I’m going to do it. And I’m going to give it 110%. My experience is that if you want results and the great feelings that come with them, well, that’s just what you will have to do to get them. Second, remember that we are all human and not machines. There will be days that you (or I) slip and don’t follow through and commit. You (and I) have to embrace that, own it, accept the consequences – big or small – and most importantly remember how we feel at that moment. Then turn that feeling, those thoughts going through your head, into your motivation to commit and follow through the next time. That’s the whole deal. Here is something to which I want everybody to commit: Join our very own Jenny Schatzle Community 5K RUN WALK benefiting Santa Barbara Schools on February 23 at 9am. Register today at or just show up. See you there! (In other words, follow through.) Nutrition: Don’t go off the deep end every weekend. It’s okay to have a cheat meal occasionally, go ahead and indulge (occasionally), but don’t over-indulge all weekend long. Remember, it takes two or three days of hard work to undo a one-day binge. Do the math: If you go crazy on Friday, Saturday and Sunday, it will take you all week just to get back to where you were the previous Thursday. It ain’t worth it. WORKOUT: WARM-UP: Jog around outside for five minutes. (Seriously. It’s good for you. So go do it.) WORKOUT: This is a thirty-minute workout with short circuits that start at the beginning of each minute. The faster you do the movements in each round of any circuit in any given minute, the more rest you have until the next round starts (at the beginning of the next minute). So work hard. This should be strenuous. CIRCUIT 1: Start at the top of every minute for ten minutes: 10 side lunges 10 mountain climbers 10 pop-ups 

CIRCUIT 2: Start at the top of every minute for ten minutes: 10 squat jumps 10 dips 10 jump lunges 10 tricep push-ups CIRCUIT 3: Start at the top of every minute for 10 minutes: 10 push-ups 20 bicycles 10 crunches 10 legs straight up, reach for your toes Stretch. (Seriously. It’s good for you. So do it.)



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with Julie Bifano Ms Bifano is drawn to micro-fiction and is currently writing her first novel – “The Grace Below.” She has a B.A. in English with an emphasis in writing from the University of San Francisco and a M.F.A. in Creative Writing, also from the University of San Francisco. More of Julie’s stories and poetry can be viewed on her website

Who Done It?


ast weekend, I arrived at Chuck’s Waterfront Grill and was guided by my hosts Dave and Susie Couch to a seat at one of the tables on the outdoor patio. I could see fancy yachts and little boats out in the picturesque harbor while I sipped a glass of local wine. I breathed in the salty sea air, and once again felt the familiar ease of living in paradise. Other guests were seated on the outdoor patio, anxiously waiting to see what a murder-mystery dinner theater here would entail. I chatted briefly with Nan Stone, partial owner of Chuck’s. Nan explained the design of the outdoor patio, which includes heaters, a fire pit, a partially enclosed glass area and radiant heat throughout the floor. She told me, “Sitting out here is like a vacation for locals.” Our conversation came to an abrupt halt when a loud group of guests came in arguing among themselves about a

Dave and Susie Couch, hosts and organizers of the interactive murder-mystery dinner theater, greet guests as they enter the patio.

She shouted, “Keep your voice down!” Surprise! These rabble-rousers were indeed actors. They took their seats right in the middle of the outdoor patio and carried on with excessive cocktails and banter. As attendees moved inside to be seated at long tables for dinner, the actors sporadically came up to people asking questions like, “Has my sister tried to flirt with you?” and “Do you have a boss that slept with your sister?” I took my seat and one of the actors, Henry Dickinson, aka “The Hanky” or “The Hankster,” sat right next to me and began to gossip about the fiasco he had earlier that day on the boat. He said, “I don’t like children. I have a buffoon of

Sue Ward and Greta Meaney anxiously await the clues.

Host Susie Couch poses with owner of Chuck’s Waterfront Grill, Steve Hyslop.

boat trip. Wait a second. Were these people part of the show? One person in the obnoxious group yelled, “Let me rub your temples!” Another cried Priscilla, John Henigin and Nan Stone are excited for the show to begin.


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out, “You left him for that guy!” An anonymous attendee at the table next to mine exclaimed, “If they’re not actors, we can put them out on a boat without any oars!” One of the troublemakers was scantily clad in a short hot pink dress.

A flavorful feast of sesame-crusted halibut with lobster miso sauce, steamed veggies and buttery mashed potatoes.

a boss!” After my creamy cup of clam chowder was served, one of the actors came to our table asking us to try his seal jerky from the seal he hunted that afternoon. I politely declined.

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Penny and Joe Pompilio pose for a quick shot before moving into the dining area for dinner and more theater.

The actors of the murdermystery theater get together for a postmurder group shot. We’ll let the killer and victim remain a mystery!

The folks sitting next to me were from Seattle, and the folks across from me were from Camarillo. It was fun to laugh with random strangers, and as the night went on, they were less like strangers and more like friends. With an option of steak or fish, I opted for the sesame-crusted halibut with lobster miso sauce. It was buttery, rich and a generous portion. The Hankster exclaimed, “I should have got the fish! You were smart!” As our death by chocolate (how appropriate!) dessert was served, one of the actors screamed, “Help me! Something is not right!” He was pulled out of the room, stumbling, and the next thing I knew, actors dressed in detective

Attendees Bill and Jeremey Bedford with friends Steve and Pat Matson.

costumes came in and announced, “There has been a casualty! The police are on their way!” Detectives began asking attendees questions about the murder. An arrest followed as the detectives let the audience know who they were taking into custody. Who done it? That’s a surprise you’ll have to go find out for yourself! Your next chances to find out whodunit at Chuck’s Waterfront Grill are on Tuesday, February 11 and on Wednesday, February 26, at 6:30pm. Tickets ($68) – which include the show and a three-course dinner – can be purchased by calling Chuck’s at 805.564.1200 or by emailing 

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...continued from p.14 to the challenges, the “problems,” for lack of a better word, they will face in the competition.) The first climber is called out to the wall but is not allowed to see the “problem” until the timer begins. The subsequent climber actually sits in a chair with his or her back to the wall, facing the crowd, while the first climber attempts his ascent(s); so although the climber in the chair can see and hear the crowd cheering wildly, s/he cannot turn around and see what the hell is going on. All the other climbers wait in the “iso” room, and come out one by one, first to the chair then to the wall. When it is any given climber’s turn, a timer starts, typically between four and six minutes, and the competitor turns around and gets his or her first look at the problem. Remember when I said it was important to note that this whole thing is a “pretty unique combination of mental and physical fortitude?” Here’s

The gang (from right): Mike O’Connor, Danielle Hammack, Pablo Hammack, Tom Winder, Duke Lettieri and Maggie McDermut.

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Time & Tide and the DAY LOW HGT HIGH FRI, FEB 7 3:46 AM SAT, FEB 8 4:55 AM SUN, FEB 9 5:53 AM MON, FEB 10 12:28 AM 2.3 6:39 AM TUES, FEB 11 1:10 AM 2.1 7:17 AM WED, FEB 12 1:45 AM 1.9 7:51 AM THURS, FEB 13 2:17 AM 1.7 8:23 AM FRI, FEB 14 2:49 AM 1.5 8:53 AM SAT, FEB 15 3:21 AM 1.2 9:24 AM SUN, FEB 16 3:54 AM 1.1 9:55 AM MON, FEB 17 4:30 AM 1.1 10:29 AM TUES, FEB 18 5:11 AM 1.1 11:05 AM WED, FEB 19 5:59 AM 1.2 11:49 AM THURS, FEB 20 12:20 AM FRI, FEB 21 1:09 AM

HGT 4.6 4.7 4.9 5.1 5.2 5.4 5.4 5.4 5.3 5 4.7 4.2 3.7 4.5 4.5

LOW 11:25 AM 12:29 PM 01:14 PM 01:50 PM 02:19 PM 02:46 PM 03:11 PM 03:35 PM 03:59 PM 04:24 PM 04:49 PM 05:14 PM 05:42 PM 7:01 AM 8:26 AM


HGT HIGH HGT LOW 0.8 06:01 PM 2.9 010:15 PM 0.4 07:10 PM 3.1 011:32 PM 0.1 07:51 PM 3.4 -0.2 08:21 PM 3.6 -0.3 08:46 PM 3.8 -0.4 09:09 PM 3.9 -0.4 09:31 PM 4.1 -0.4 09:55 PM 4.2 -0.2 010:19 PM 4.3 0 010:44 PM 4.4 0.3 011:12 PM 4.5 0.6 011:43 PM 4.5 1.1 1.2 12:47 PM 3.1 06:15 PM 1.2 02:21 PM 2.6 07:01 PM

HGT 2.4 2.4

...continued p.27



inter finally came and went (well, hopefully not). Almost two weeks of waves have put the hook in deep for most local surfers. The beginning of the weekend looks fairly promising with a north/northwest filling in. Most spots in SB and Goleta will be in the waist-to-shoulderhigh range, and standout spots will be plus that. No south wind in our forecast means light west/ northwest winds, so breach breaks might not be the call. Cloudy skies for at least the next week out means one not very big swell will fade and another moderate one will fill in, so chance are good for a rideable week ahead. Be kind to each other out there. There’s plenty to go around.

 1.6 2

where the mental component first comes into play, and it’s hugely important. The climber has to make a quick assessment of how s/he will actually ascend the problem. That’s a heady game, one involving quite a bit of fast visualization, I imagine, given that climbing is likely infinitely more difficult if you choose the wrong path, or put the wrong hand or foot in the wrong place. After the initial assessment is made, the climber goes and tries to climb the damned thing. That’s the physical part. It is mindnumbingly hard. There are a set number of ascents – typically four, five or six, from what I gathered – in the competition, and each one has a time limit. They are completed sequentially, so the climber goes from one problem to the next, never getting the benefit of a route preview, or of a significant rest. (Stamina is part of the whole thing too, and that’s really truly something key that I quickly found out I had basically none of.) Scores are based on (1) the number of successfully completed problems in the tie period allotted (aka “tops”), (2) the number of key holds controlled, (3) the number of “flashed” problems (i.e., the number of problems successfully topped on the first try), (4) the total number of attempts to actual tops and (5) the total number of attempts to the highest point on the wall. So there’s a lot going on here for a twelve-year-old. And yet Santa Barbara’s own Pablo Hammack was first out of seventeen climbers in his age group back in the Regionals in San Diego a couple months ago. Then he was second of twenty kids from around the Western United States in the Divisionals in Tucson back in January.

-Surf Country Doug

For a more in-depth daily report call Surf Country, 805-683-4450

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Featured Breweries

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Santa Barbara Beer Garden: A Tasting Tour Saturday, February 22, 1 to 5 pm Santa Barbara Botanic Garden 1212 Mission Canyon Road Put on your walking shoes and explore the Santa Barbara Botanic Garden with a beer in hand! Join us as the Garden hosts Santa Barbara^BEER Garden – a mini beer festival featuring brews chosen to complement the native plants and unique atmosphere of the Garden’s living displays like the wildflower meadow, desert section, Mission Creek Dam and redwood grove. Festival designer, Sentinel columnist and Cicerone, Zachary Rosen will be on hand to help guests learn the art of abstract beer pairing in this amazing setting. Your “tasting tour ticket” includes a Garden logo beer glass, special tasting notes and map, and light snacks. Food tickets may be purchased for an additional fee.

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$50 – Guests, $35 – Garden Members, $20 – Designated Drivers For more information call 805-682-4726, ext. 102 Guests must be 21 and older to attend.

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F E B R UA RY 8 – 2 2 | 2 0 1 4


by Christina Enoch

Aparna’s Awesome Ayurvedic Gastronomy Food as Medicine, indeed. Just look at all these wonderful medicinal Indian spices. They smell heavenly. Ayurvedic Lifestyle Counselor/Chef/Speaker, Aparna Khanolkar does her “green power” cooking class thing in the kitchen. (She’s a great dancer for Solstice, too!)


participate in Summer Solstice Parade every year. My tribe is called Panzumo, and it’s led by Lisa Beck and Budhi Harlow. Last year, we were in wild red costumes doing west Africa-meetsBollywood dance. I love Solstice. It was through the wonderful, lively

event – definitely the highlight of my summer – that I got to meet Aparna Khanolkar, a wonderful, lively Indian woman. Aparna, in turn, introduced me to “real” home-cooked Indian food. I’ve traveled quite a bit but haven’t been to India (yet), so all I really know about Indian food comes from local


santa barbara’s premier

Lentils and sprouts and seeds, oh my…

There are those fantastic French lentils with spinach and leafy greens.

restaurants, some of which are really quite delightful. But when I first tried some of Aparna’s creations, well, I knew I’d found something unique and special. Naturally, I started chef stalking her. I wanted – no I needed – to learn. I didn’t have to stalk for long, fortunately; Aparna teaches an Ayurvedic cooking class once a month. So I signed up.

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Fun Flavors, Feel Fantastic Aparna is an Ayurvedic lifestyle counselor, chef and speaker. Born and raised in Southern India (Mysore), she was immersed in the world of Ayurveda through food, herbs, yoga and meditation. She grew her own food, prepared three fresh meals a day and practiced many rituals of Vedic living. After working at the Chopra Center in San Diego as head chef and moving to Santa Barbara, she decided to teach Ayurvedic lifestyle tools that could be easily integrated into Western life. “I want to give people an experience of my philosophy: Food is medicine for the body. Love is medicine for the heart. Meditation is medicine for the mind.” Aparna’s gentle voice soothed my

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Greens, greens, good for the heart…

F E B R UA RY 8 – 2 2 | 2 0 1 4 |

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mind into peaceful alignment before the cooking began. She spent some time explaining “doshas” (you’ll know a bit about them if you watch The Dr. Oz Show) and how they form the foundation for healthy cooking and eating. This alone was fascinating and worthwhile to learn, and it culminated in a quiz we took to determine our own doshas and how we might balance our food accordingly. Then we got down to cooking. (And eating.) We started with some beautiful French lentils, spinach and lime. The delicate dish takes a wonderful ginger and garlic paste – I suggest making a small jar of this little concoction and keeping it in your fridge; it will make your Ayurvedic cooking life much easier – and is simple to cook. The key is to use freshly ground coriander. Simply dry-roast the seeds and grind them in a spice grinder. (I’m telling you, it’s totally worth this extra step.) The lentils go perfectly with kale fried rice. (Yep, another lovely way to eat a healthy green. Happy times.) Delicious again, and I didn’t even crave something sweet after the bitter greens. (Funny, but in Ayurvedic eating, our bodies take bitter food as sweet. Kale for dessert? Maybe for the more disciplined among us, but I don’t think I can go that far.)

This Asian-style kale salad is no regular kale salad. Make one to see for yourself!

Asian-style kale salad with sesame oil came next. This one is packed with nutrients, and I loved that it didn’t take any “dressing,” per se. All you need is sesame oil and garlic. Divine. Then came a little tofu stir-fry that was whipped up in just a couple moments. (Healthy and quick, a nice weeknight meal.) And, really, the hits just kept on coming. New flavor combinations and profiles I hadn’t experienced flew out of Aparna’s kitchen and had me wanting more. (And more. And more.) If this sounds like something you might enjoy – or even if you’d just like to learn some totally new and fun cooking techniques, ingredients and Indian dishes – I highly recommend the class. I loved every minute of it. Sort of like the Solstice Parade! For more information, including Aparna’s cookbook – which contains recipes for the dishes mentioned above – and her next cooking classes, check out www. You’ll be glad you did.

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Warm water during your meal? You bet. In Ayurvedic, one sips a small glass of warm water throughout the dining experience. (No, not cold water, that’s bad for digestion.) Remember this Ayurvedic saying: “A person with strong digestive fires can convert poison into nectar, while someone with weak digestive fires will turn nectar into poison.” Whoa. Better sip that warm water. 

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...continued from p.9 tun through a grated floor called a false bottom in a process called lautering. After the initial wort run-off, hot water is sprinkled on top of the grain bed as it is stirred. This stage is called sparging and helps extract more sugars from the grains. The wort is then sent from the mash tun to the boiling kettle. Got it?

Pure Order’s new tap handles.

The First Tests

You can’t really brew the first day you “turn on” a brewery. There is a variety of tests that need to be run and system properties that need to be determined. James, David and Kevin had spent the past two weeks testing the system with hot water. There may be nothing like spilled milk, but spilling scorching hot, sticky wort is just as bad. These tests ensure that all of the equipment is plumbed and David Burge removes the grain from the mash tun. sealed correctly. Every brewing system is will become more concrete, but for now it a little bit different, so this process also was enough to make them ready for their allows them to calculate various volumes first official batch. The test brew was gurgling away in one and rates that help them design their of their fermenters and we checked its recipes and brewing schedule. Running hot water through the system status as we waited for the wort to warm can only tell you so much though. Brewers up in the boiling kettle. James filled a need to know how actual beer ingredients glass of the very young beer and we passed will perform in the system. Two days around the pint, tasting its progress. It had before, the Pure Order boys had brewed a mango-pear juice flavor with a distinct a test batch. It didn’t follow any particular breadiness coming from the globules of Before recipe but simply allowed them to get yeast bobbing around the liquid. Winner rough numbers for certain variables. As long, the wort started to boil, so we More Wines! Easy & headed Plentiful Parking! back over to the brewing system. they Even brew more batches, these numbers

than with an all-barley brew. Ahh, the sweet smell of a young brew – and brewery, in this case – is really something to behold. I could hear the sporadic whir of the pump back inside as it turned on and off, pumping the condensate back into the boiling kettle to reduce water loss during the boil. And as I stood outside, I reflected on the changes that this area had gone through in recent times. When I first visited the brewery, the side lot was a chunky dirt yard with matted weeds and overgrown grasses. That space is now split in two. The first half is a tailored lawn that will soon be decorated with picnic tables and games. The other side will be a hop yard. Right now the area ner Winmulch, is covered with small flags poking up to mark where the hop vines will be Largest selection of Central Coast and planted this and spring. In the parking lot Largest selection of Central Coast stands an electric blue ’78 VW Bus. This sparkling wines in Santa Barbara sparkling wines in Santaiconic Barbara James and David take measurements. ride will soon be seen cruising the * Free gift wrap on all bottles * * Free gift wrap on all bottles * of Santa Barbara, delivering Pure streets The Boil Order beer to the local eateries. Even More Wines! & Plentiful Parking! The boil was now over and to As the boil began, Easy fellow beer writer Sean Lewis joined us for the festivities. commemorate the moment, James filled Even More Wines! & Plentiful Parking!Crew – Cheers,Easy Bob Wesley & the Winehound Winner a glass with fresh wort and then topped James grabbed a pitcher of hop&pellets – Cheers, Bobfull Wesley the Winehound Crew and poured them into the rolling liquid. it off with Maker’s Mark. He poured Even Largest More selection Wines! ofEasy &Coast Plentiful Central and Parking! The Crooked Neck Hefeweizen uses the it evenly amongst us and we raised our sparkling wines in Santa Barbara German hop, Tettnanger. The raw hops glasses, toasting the brewery and the * Free gift wrap on all bottles * have a lemon and grass character with an health of the beer. The bourbon added to overall aroma that can only be described as, the sweet wort a French toast flavor that Winner with a singed note of alcohol. well, hoppy. The first dose of hops is added finished the beginning of the boil and contributes This salute is a twist on a Czech tradition – Cheers, Bob Wesley & the Winehound Crewinner Even Moreat Wines! Easy & Plentiful Parking! W Largest selection Central Coast and Kevin had learned about from that the most bitterness to theof brew. 3849 State St. Santa Barbara • (805) 845-5247 Winner 3849 State St. Santa Barbara • (805) Urquell. 845-5247 r e sparkling wines in Santa Barbara Czech brewers will do The bittering Winn compounds found in Pilsner Largest selection of Central Coast and * Free gift wrap on all bottles * Winner raw hops are insoluble in water, but a toast of fresh wort and hop schnapps sparkling wines in Santa Barbara Winner boiling them, however, will convert the every time they brew a new recipe or r e innner Win W * Free gift wrap on all bottles * compounds into a form that can dissolve welcome a new brewer. Central er isWesley Na zdravi! LargestLargest selectionselection of CentralofCoast and Coast and in water. The boiled for at least 60 nBob Winwort – Cheers, & the Winehound Crew Largest selection of Central Coast and Winner minutes to maximize the conversion of Largest selection of Central Coast and sparkling wines in Santa Barbara sparkling wines in Santa Barbara 3849 State St. Santa Barbara • (805) 845-5247 Even More Wines! Easy & Plentiful Parking! Finishing Up * bittering compounds. During time, sparkling wines in Santa Barbara * Freethis gift wrap on all bottles –sparkling Cheers,*Bob the wines in FreeWesley gift wrap onWinehound all Santa bottles *onBarbara *&Free gift wrap Crew all bottles * Winner many of the hops’ aromatic compounds After the boil, the wort is chilled * Free gift wrap on all bottles * Free gift gift wrap wrap on all all bottles ** Free on bottles ** are boiled off. Brewers will usually add and oxygenated before it is sent to the Largest of throughout Central Coast and hopsselection several times the boil to fermenter. James and David added the sparkling wines in Santacompounds Barbara in yeast as the fermenter filled up. In a couple help replenish the aromatic – Cheers, Bob Wesley & the Winehound Crew * Free gift wrap on all bottles – Cheers, Bob Wesley & wrap the Winehound Crew * the liquid. of weeks the beer *will be finished. But for Free *gift• (805) wrap845-5247 on all bottles * Free on all bottles 3849 State St. Santa* Barbara Cheers, Bob Bob Wesley Wesley & the the gift Winehound Crew –– Cheers, & Winehound Crew – Cheers, Bob Wesley & the Winehound now, the brew day was done. 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by Tommie Vaughn Tommie adapted her love of the stage to the love of the

page. As lead singer for the band Wall of Tom, she created This Rock in My Heart and This Roll in My Soul, a fictional book series based loosely on her experiences in the L.A. music scene. Now she’s spending her time checking out and writing about all things Santa Barbara. Reach Tommie at or follow her on Twitter at TommieVaughn1.

The Search


y family and I are, ah, displaced. Well, not really as of yet, but half of our collective life is in boxes. Why is this, you ask? Oh, just the normal thing that families do, you know, they grow. And even though mine has only grown by half – my second kid, a daughter, is just six months old, and she is quite teeny tiny – it seems that Christmas broke us. Not in the ways of cashola, mind you, but in the ways of space. Actual physical space. Let me explain. Going from living in a large fourbedroom house with a huge pool on a 7,000-square-foot lot in Burbank, to living in a 700-square-foot two bedroom in Santa Barbara has taken its toll. Yeah, yeah, it’s super charming and walking distance to Leadbetter Beach and all that, but damn people! How do you do it? There’s just no room in this town. I have a hard time even having so much as a clear thought in such a small space. Granted, that could be the wine from Santa Ynez that I enjoy too much, but I doubt it. I’m sure it’s the lack of space, yeah, it’s definitely the small quarters. I mean, sure, we could buy a nice home here. Wait, I have to stop laughing, it’s hard to type. Ok, I’m back. But not to worry, we are happy renters and only strive to find the home that we can rent, afford and thrive in for a very long time. And that, my good people, brings me to the point of this whole column (it only took me two hundred and

sixty-one words to lay the groundwork but here it is): How the hell do you find a decent rental in Santa Barbara?

Goleta: The Good Land (That’s A Little Far Away, Apparently) Maybe it’s me. I am a bit of a rental snob, after all, and I have extremely high standards, which are cause for slight panic and that mental twitch that has become part of my psyche. And even though the going has been tough, I have faith that the perfect home and landlord have been waiting for my little family and all is well in rental heaven. I’ve caught glimpses of greatness. I know it’s out there. And so I search craigslist for the umpteenth time, and I hold me breath. It’s funny. I steadfastly refuse to live in a condo or a townhouse or a duplex, and yet Santa Barbara is the land of gorgeous condos and townhouses and duplexes. Such is the twisted fate of a musician and mother who will quiet neither herself nor her own children and husband – he’s a wizard on the guitar, by the way – and who will also not force upon her neighbor the audacity of her own family’s rather loud existence, one that we find relaxing and totally normal. Therein lies my conundrum. So I search, and search, and search some more, and acquaint myself with more parts of Santa Barbara than I care to meet. I find huge homes in Goleta and my new friends

F E B R UA RY 8 – 2 2 | 2 0 1 4 |

scoff, “Goleta? It’s sooooo far away!” Really? Really people? I lived in Los Angeles where it took me thirty minutes to get to the grocery store, and if one of my friends moved from Hollywood to Santa Monica it might as well have been Canada for all I cared. We’d never see each other again and we all knew it. So forgive me if Goleta just doesn’t seem eons away.

“I steadfastly refuse to live in a condo or a townhouse or a duplex, and yet Santa Barbara is the land of gorgeous condos and townhouses and duplexes.”

No Worries But, alas, I understand. It’s something that I have grown to love about Santa Barbara living: I can get anywhere in ten minutes. It’s literally the first time in my life that when I say I will be there in ten minutes, I actually mean it and can make it happen. So I keep searching, and I keep packing because I know it’s out there; I even made a dream board with my three-year-old son last week. My requests to the rental universe?


Pretty standard stuff, frankly. Three bedrooms, two baths, vaulted ceilings, a big fireplace (that works), lots of outdoor space so I can plant a garden, a fenced yard to keep my kids locked in safe and possibly for a future pet. (Side note: Why don’t landlords take pets? It’s amazing the amount of ads I see that don’t allow them. They would rather allow a group of seven to ten students rent their home than a family with a dog? Come on, didn’t they go to college? I did, and I can’t seem to remember most of it. Sorry landlords, but I had to say something for all the pet owners out there. Back to my list.) A lot of privacy so I can make noise and not worry, lots of light, a view, whimsical architecture, a great school district. Too much? My son added that the home needs to have a red door and a cool doorbell, so there’s that too. I know it’s out there. I’ve actually seen it and if I thought the landlord (who lives in Connecticut) would read the damned Sentinel, well, I’d bait him even harder. Instead I’m just pissing in the warm Santa Barbara wind. Regardless, after talking with a few friends about the tough rental market, I thought this needed to be written. Is this a rant? Heck no! I live in Santa Barbara, baby, or at least I do until March 1. And like everybody else I’ve met in town, I have no worries at all. 




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Thinking of Theater

with Mark Léisuré

Mark spends much of his time wandering Santa Barbara and environs, enjoying the simple things that come his way. A show here, a benefit there, he is generally out and about and typically has a good time. He says that he writes “when he feels the urge” and doesn’t want his identity known for fear of an experience that is “less than authentic.” So he remains at large, roaming the town, having fun. Be warned.

Festival Follies


t was a bit surreal hearing foulmouthed, feral-tongued comedian Kathy Griffin skewering Hollywood celebs at the Granada Theatre just a block down the street from the Arlington, where SBIFF was simultaneously honoring Cate Blanchett last Friday night. The tale of the two Kates (yeah, I’m misspelling both of them) was especially weird in that the Woody Allen controversy had just spiked that morning. Griffin dove right in within moments of taking the stage – referring to private areas of her anatomy and suggesting that Ms. Blanchett wouldn’t be telling any p---y jokes of her own – while Cate conspicuously omitted Allen in her “thank you’s” at the end of the night. Griffin also set her sights on another famous femme being honored later during SBIFF, Montecito’s own Oprah Winfrey, boasting of not being impressed to be performing “just steps away from Oprah’s

fiefdom, the pearly gates” of her estate. When a faulty spotlight tweaked on and off moments later, she wondered aloud if it were the work of Winfrey’s henchmen. It was just another synchronous moment in a star-studded week in Santa Barbara, where Karate Kid star Ralph Macchio – in town to promote a short fiction film he directed – could go unrecognized at a film party, while weirdly David O. Russell stopped on the red carpet to note a journalist’s resemblance to Philip Seymour Hoffman just hours before the actor’s body was discovered in New York. Such is life – and sadly, death – during SBIFF. Still planning to check out the festival? SBIFF’s final weekend brings three panels chock full of Oscar nominees to the Lobero (screenwriters at 11am, directors at 2pm and visual effects at 4pm), plus best-actor nominee Bruce Dern to the Arlington at 8pm, all on

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Alicia Sedwick, center, returns to Ensemble Theater Company for Good People from February 8 to 23 at the New Vic.

Saturday, and a closing night screening of Before Midnight with a Q&A session with writers-actors Julie Delpy and Ethan Hawke and director-writer Richard Linklater. And don’t forget to check the website for the lineup of the festival’s 3rd Weekend, which offers reruns of some of the fest’s most popular and awardwinning movies for free all weekend long at the Riviera Theatre, February 14-16.

Classical Corner It’s a crowded calendar for classical music, with performances ranging in size from a solo mandolinist interpreting Bach to a full symphony orchestra with some big works (and a very big name). Chris Thile, the once and once again leader of bluegrass band Nickel Creek (the band has its first new album in nearly a decade set for release later this month), kicks things off at the Lobero on February 11. He’ll play cantitas and sonatas by Bach as well as some originals. The next night, Gabriel Kahane and his yMusic ensemble will mix things up at SOhO Restaurant & Music Club. On Valentine’s Day, your sweetie might thrill to the return to Camerata Pacifica of principal percussionist Ji Hye Jung, a marimba master. Ji Hye solos with her own arrangement of Bach’s “Violin Sonata No. 1” in G Minor to open the program and closes it with John Psathas’ “One Study.” The Santa Barbara Symphony’s Salute to Love concerts on February 1516 feature works by Ravel, Tchaikovsky and Elgar. Another choice for Sunday afternoon: Opera Santa Barbara second flutist Suzanne Duffy and New West Symphony’s principal flutist Paul Fried team up with pianist Bryan Pezzone at Trinity Church for a program featuring works by Copland, Martinů and Ian Clarke. Monday brings the Bahi Youth Symphony and piano soloist JeanYves Thibaudet in a CAMA-sponsored concert at the Granada. The Brazilian ensemble plays pieces by Tchaikovsky, Ravel, Revueltas, Villa-Lobos and Arturo Márquez.

Ensemble Theater Company’s second salvo at its new digs of the New Vic is almost as modern as the company’s new home: David Lindsay-Abaire’s Good People, which just premiered in 2011. The comic-drama from the Pulitzer Prizewinner (Rabbit Hole) – a Tony nominee itself – traverses two vastly different neighborhoods in Boston, seeing if old friends can transcend their divergent socio-economic paths. Good People plays February 8-23. A different sort of culture clash also hits a local stage within this upcoming fortnight: Meg Miroshnik’s The Fairytale Lives of Russian Girls, which imagines a modern-day Russia where the fairytale world underlies, leaks through and eventually overtakes real life. UCSB’s Department of Theater takes on the allegory February 14-22. Also on the boards is another fearfantasy fanfare: Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa’s King of Shadows, Elements Theatre Collective’s first show since the departure of co-founders Sara Rademacher and Emily Jewell. The 2008 play finds a 15-year-old runaway plagued by demons beneath the street hooking up with a grad student who just might save his life, or at least his psyche. It’s presented pop-up style at various venues around the area most days through February 23. Also, Chicago’s star-making Second City comedy troupe invades Isla Vista on February 19 with its Happily Ever Laughter show.

Short Cuts Alvin Youngblood Hart, Corey Harris and Guy Davis comprise True Blues, which hits UCSB’s Campbell Hall on February 10... ALO, which got its start out in Isla Vista when the band members were students are UCSB, gives a little love back to the school on February 13 via a symposium discussion about “Music Life After College” on campus before showing up at SOhO for a Valentine’s Day concert as part of Tour d’Amour... Also on Valentine’s Day night: ceaselessly romantic crooner Johnny Mathis returns to the Chumash Casino, and erstwhile stand-up comic Paul Reiser (Mad About You) returns to the stage for the first time in about 20 years, doing his relationship-familykids shtick on stage at the Lobero... The following night (February 15), Santa Barbara-connected singer-songwriter Jim Messina, who maintains a home in the Santa Ynez Valley, teams up with former Poco colleague Richie Furay for a career retrospective concert at the Lobero... Sunday night (February 16), it’s Jack S--t, considered the hippest in-crowd band in the land, fronted by Davey Faragher, Val McCallum and Pete Thomas with lots of expected guest stars (check the website for inside info) in the next Sings Like Hell concert at the Lobero... 

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...continued from p.20

Mike O’Connor, smooth as silk from Baltimore. (Yep, that Baltimore.)

Now he’s heading for the Nationals from February 28 to March 2 out in Colorado. But he had to get by me first.

Pablo the Rock Jock

I figured I’d start easy on the kid. “I just did a V1,” I told him, sandbagging, “why don’t we go hit a V2 and see where it goes.” “Sure,” he shrugged and smiled. Innocent. Kind. “How about that new one over there?” There was a slight over-hang involved and I smelled a challenge. “Let’s do this.” Pablo walked nonchalantly to the wall, examined it for around three seconds, grabbed the starting hold and scampered up the thing like he was strolling down State Street with an ice cream cone on a warm, leisurely Sunday afternoon. Uh-oh. I approached the wall and examined the route. Hmmm. How in the hell do you get from here to… there? A touch of panic. Patience, Matthew, a twelve-year-old just walked up this thing. You can do it. I studied the wall again. And I couldn’t figure it out. At the same time, I sensed a crowd gathering behind me. I looked at the wall again, but it was futile. My forearms were still burning from the damned VFUN and I was having a hard time focusing as other climbers, many of them kids, stopped to watch. Then, a voice from on high. A savior. “You can do it, Matt.” It was, inexplicably, Pablo, genuinely encouraging me. I turned around and there he was, right behind me. “Start with your hands here and your right foot here.” He pointed. “Smear with your left, then use your right hand to grab here.” I started to see it. “Then my left there, my right foot to the starting hold and…” “Yep, that’s it.” Pablo backed away.

I grabbed the starting hold, and struggled to get my feet into position on the wall. I reached out with my right hand, just as Pablo suggested, grabbed what seemed an impossibly small hold, and hung on for dear life. My forearms burned like the fiery pits of hell. Sweat drenched the back of my shirt. I was all of three feet off the ground, clinging to the wall, with fifteen vertical to go. I tried hard. I really did. Let’s just say that I didn’t make it.

Technique + Power = Grace

I spent a couple more hours climbing – if you can call it that – with Mike and Pablo. I watched as they glided through wildly challenging problems with a demonstration of power and grace that I frankly don’t recall often seeing (in a certain way, it was almost like watching a powerful dancer’s movements during a solo performance).

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Austin Herlihy, Steve Brown and Chris Parker represented the lessor of this 7,180 SF Office space which leased to a publicly traded company.

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by Kateri Wozny Kateri is an award-winning journalist with a

background in print, online, radio and TV news. A native of Minneapolis, MN, she has written for the Chicago Sun-Times Media Group, Pepperdine University and Acorn Newspapers. She works full time as a public relations manager locally and loves exploring the Santa Barbara fashion scene. Follow her on Twitter @kitkatwozny.

Flights of Fancy: Hummingbird Boutique Spreads Its Wings for Customers


have been told many times that I have high energy and that I flutter fast everywhere, so it made perfect sense for my wallet and me to fly to Carpinteria and shop at Hummingbird Boutique on Santa Claus Lane. “Growing up in Los Angeles, I would come often and visit Santa Claus Lane as a little girl,” said owner Lynn Davis. “It has really transformed [over the years], now it’s a fun afternoon to come down and eat lunch, watch dolphins on the beach and then do a little shopping. It’s such a nice, vibrant area.” Hummingbird Boutique has a beach and countryside cottage feel to it with the peaceful ocean out back and builtin cabinets and draperies inside. Upon landing, the sweet nectar I found was an array of gorgeous jewelry, handbags,

The shop has a great look and feel; it’s definitely worth checking out if you haven’t.

Hummingbird Boutique owner Lynn Davis always looks good. And she’s got a terrific Santa Claus Lanebased business to boot.

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clothing and gifts such as candles, diffusers and even nice smelling soaps from the Santa Barbara Soap Company. Lynn has the biggest Hummingbird heartbeat when it comes to helping her customers and supplying the best quality items. The boutique name came about after Davis witnessed a hummingbird chick fall out of its nest. After nurturing it back to health, the name flew. “Hummingbirds have always been special to my family,” she explained. “My grandmother and I used to watch them and she had hummingbird feeders all around the outside of her house. Hummingbirds are messengers of the gods in the Native American culture and are special.” Davis, a one-time legal assistant and, later, a teacher at Roosevelt Elementary, has lived in Carpinteria for 25 years and always envisioned herself as an entrepreneur. In June 2011, Hummingbird Boutique was hatched. “I saw the space and it was amazing, I had to have it,” she told me, inspired. Hummingbird Boutique carries highend apparel designer lines such as Johnny Was, Biya and CP Shades. Watercolor and oil on canvas art is also sold from local artists such as Fred Sweeney, Ginny Speirs and Debbie Green. Handbag lines include Hammitt Los Angeles and Isabella Fiori. With the Carpinteria bag ban, I found myself a washable and reversible bag by Mixt Studio. “Our customers want a more personal experience and are looking for items that are unique and different that you don’t see everywhere in large department stores,” Lynn said, proudly. “They are looking for a more intimate, special experience.”

Sparkly Stuff

“Jewelry has always been my passion. I look at it as wearable art,” she continued. “The boutique was just going to have jewelry in it and developed into more once I saw the space.” Some of these jewelry designers include Susan Cummings, Jamie Joseph (where I found myself a stone ring), Adel Chefridi, Hammered Hoops and Kimberly Vyn. Lynn says she develops her outfit for the day starting with the jewelry piece and not

the clothes. “When fashionistas wake up and ask ‘What will I wear today?,’ I like to suggest that they start with the jewelry and build around it,” she said. Prices range from a card for $4 to $8,000 for an 18K, sterling silver or diamond jewelry piece. It is quite possibly the most exquisite jewelry I have seen in my shopping journeys, with Hummingbird Boutique carrying over 250 designers!

Thoughtful Trunk Shows Davis also hosts trunk shows, as you might imagine, with the next one coming up on Saturday, February 8 (the day this issue hits the racks), from 10am – 5pm with jewelry designer Alicia Van Fleteren. Chocolate and champagne will be served. “It’s an opportunity for ladies to see entire collections in advance and pick items that I wouldn’t necessarily buy for the store,” Davis said. “It is a chance to be together, have refreshments and celebrate.”

Uncaged Generosity Hummingbird also makes it a heartfelt priority to give back to the community, with proceeds and items helping the Santa Barbara Zoo, Girls Inc., Domestic Violence Solutions and the Center for Successful Aging. She even sells Little Shirley vases for small flowers and proceeds are donated to breast cancer research. My good deed was done as I picked one out. “It’s my chance to say thank you to the community and help; it’s meaningful,” Lynn said. I felt joy and tranquility with my purchases and flew away fast, lighter in the wallet, sure, but happier in my hummingbird heart. Hummingbird Boutique is located 3823 Santa Claus Lane. Hours are Monday – Saturday from 10am – 5:30pm and Sunday from 11am – 4pm. For more information, call (805) 684-5800 or visit Hummingbird on Facebook or Twitter. The website is currently being revised and customers will soon be able to buy items online at www. 

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by Rachelle Oldmixon

Super Bowl Party Pooper


didn’t watch the Super Bowl this year. I didn’t watch the commercials, either. I guarantee my football-fan friends were glad I stayed home; my yearly questions are annoying at best. And my concern for the players during the particularly nastylooking tackles seems to dull everyone else’s game-day spirit. But that’s all right by me. Somebody should be worrying about the brain damage so many players sustain. And this year, it looks like there are more people worrying with me. When the news broke that the National Football League agreed to pay $765 million to settle a “concussion” lawsuit brought by 4,500 players and families, the media suddenly remembered what it was saying almost twenty years ago: Chronic traumatic encephalopathy is a huge problem for NFL players. Chronic traumatic encephalopathy (hereinafter CTE). It sounds like an obscure problem only some people get. If we break down the words, though, it becomes pretty clear: chronic = persistent or long-lasting; traumatic = resulting from an injury; Encephalopathy = disorder or disease of the brain. In other words, CTE is a chronic brain disorder caused by trauma to the brain. Most people with CTE don’t get their diagnosis after one severe brain injury (some do, but they’re the minority). Most CTE patients have a prolonged history of concussions and other mild traumatic brain injuries (mTBI). Like, for example, grown men who repeatedly slam their heads into other grown men’s fast-moving and typically rather large, muscular bodies in pursuit of an oblong ball or a first down or a fumble recovery.

A self-professed science nerd, Rachelle has her B.A. in neuroscience from Skidmore College in upstate New York, and is working towards her Master’s in psychology at UCSB. In her free time, she blogs at www. She never could quite understand why she had to choose just one area of science; they are all fascinating. Especially when paired with some classic rock.

NFL: National Fraudsters League So what’s the big deal about CTE? Why did retired players sue the NFL over it? Why did the NFL pay? Don’t these players know the risks when they start their career? They’re all good questions. And they’re all linked. CTE is degenerative, like Alzheimer’s Disease. Patients experience memory loss, dementia, mood swings, aggression, depression and loss of higher-order thinking (planning, money management, impulse control, etc.). Many retired players start to experience these symptoms (whether they are formally diagnosed with CTE or not) by the age of forty. Their loved ones have gone on the record as saying that these men are old decades before their time. Some, especially those who don’t have a solid support network, squander away their earnings within months of retiring, living in poverty as CTE slowly destroys their brains. In the early 1990s, there was a flurry of news stories about how concussions sustained by NFL players may lead to CTE-like symptoms later in life. Doctors and scientists alike were interviewed and all agreed that concussions were a serious

concern for the NFL. So, in 1994, the NFL created a team of their own doctors and researchers: the Mild Traumatic Brain Injury Committee. This committee was funded by the NFL and published its research in a pro NFL journal. (I’m sure you can guess where this is going.) All their tests resulted in one single conclusion: Concussions are not a danger to NFL players. That led to the conclusion that the concern over concussions was a media-made falsehood aimed at creating controversy. And that is the truth under which the NFL has operated for twenty years. It is also the reason why retired players sued the NFL: Many argue that the NFL hid the dangers of concussions from players and fans alike despite knowledge to the contrary.

The Turd in the Super Punchbowl In that light, the $765 million might seem like a fair settlement. But if that money were divided equally among each of the players and families who sued, it equates to roughly $170,000 per player. That would cover the costs of treating a player with severe CTE for approximately four years. Four. That’s not very long. It gets worse when you look at how the settlement was actually chopped up: $675 million was allotted for compensating former players who could prove they have suffered severe cognitive injury, $75 million is destined for covering the cost of Baseline Medical Exams for former

F E B R UA RY 8 – 2 2 | 2 0 1 4 |


players that may be used to establish a qualifying diagnosis, $10 million goes to a research and education fund and more than $2 million dollars is for legal fees. The terms of the settlement, if you noticed, require that each of those 4,500 players and families (the latter in the case of deceased players) have to medically prove that they have severe cognitive impairment, dementia, Alzheimer’s Disease or ALS (amyotrophic lateral sclerosis/Lou Gehrig’s Disease – neurodegenerative). This requires medical care, which the NFL is happy to provide, using their own doctors. This step, ironically, may be enough to deter many players from claiming their money, especially since many of the more affected do not have the support network they need to successfully navigate the legal and medical jargon sure to be associated with obtaining their compensation. This kind of gross misuse of a human upsets me. The fact that we, as a society, both allow and venerate such willful destruction of another’s body and mind makes me ill. There. I said it. So if you don’t want to think about how modern-day football is possibly worse than Roman gladiator matches, don’t invite me to your Super Bowl party next year. I probably won’t go even if you do. The fewer people who watch such a deadly sport, the less of a money-maker it will be for the team owners seated high above the carnage like the Caesars of old. Plus, the commercials have gotten kind of lame. 

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In the Garden with

1431 San Andres Street

Mr. Greenjeans

by Randy Arnowitz “Mr. Greenjeans,” as he is known around

Santa Barbara, is a gardener, horticulturist and writer. He particularly enjoys working with roses, orchids and sharing the day with his golden retriever Peaches, who faithfully accompanies him in the field. Contact him at

Saving ’Til A Rainy Day

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ll week, I kept coming up with all this exciting stuff to tell you guys – like, how my sweet peas finally started to take off after stubbornly sulking all winter. Then there was the passion vine that I planted from a cutting a year ago and is now almost completely covering the chicken coop. I even thought of you all when I went to the nursery this morning and was reminded of how much I love growing succulents. I hate to disappoint, but though you are probably as excited to hear about my gardening exploits as I am to share them, I feel as though there is a more pressing subject to discuss besides my Weekly Adventures in Gardening. We need to talk about this pesky water problem. Actually, it’s a pesky lack-ofwater problem. As I write this, the radio is telling me that there’s a 60% chance of rain tomorrow. The Yahoo Weather app on my phone shows a diagram of a fluffy cloud with the sun peeking from behind for that same day. Meanwhile, my wunderground. com weather app admits to a mix of clouds and sun. Which are we to believe? Even if we do get wet within the next few days, it’s unlikely that the event will put much of a dent in our drought situation. So, with that in mind, I’ve had a few thoughts about ways to use at least a little less water. Bear with me if some of these are obvious and elementary:

In the Kitchen

I keep a large pitcher or watering can near my sink, so that while I’m waiting for the water to get warm, I can collect the cool water that comes out first. Then I throw that water in the garden bed outside my kitchen door or use it later to water my pots.

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In the Bathroom

Again, pretty obvious, but I now shut the darn water off while brushing my teeth. I’m not sure why, but I’ve always thought that I was doing a better job brushing if the water ran while I was doing it. I’m pretty sure that it doesn’t work that way, so now I turn off the water after spitting into the sink. Oh yeah, and unless I’m having company I only flush after the second or third time I pee. We’ll let it go at that.

In the Garden

Start listing your priorities. You might want to think about what your wateruse priorities are. For example, one person’s list might consist of a lawn,

Succulents are colorful, interesting and forgiving if you forget to water them. Not all of them are spiky and threatening.

roses, cut flower garden, veggie garden, container plants, hosing down sidewalks and driveway, washing the cars, etc. Hopefully, you’ve stopped washing the sidewalks and driveways by now, but it may be time to say goodbye to that thirsty lawn or the cut flowers for a season or two until the reservoir fills up again. Growing vegetables in large plastic or ceramic containers is more efficient than in the ground, as the water and fertilizer goes directly to where the plant roots are. Get to know your irrigation timer. I know, I know, I hate to bring this up but you really need to know how to program this thing. I find it helps to make an easyto-read chart that lists the stations or zones and the type of irrigation, for example: lawn pop-ups or lawn rotors. Then list the programs, days on and station times. Try to get by with the least amount of water possible and keep backing off the time until zones show signs of stress. Make a separate summer and winter schedule, so you can refer back to the previous season’s schedule. That way you’ll know what worked for you last time. Grow cacti and succulents. These guys look great and come in a zillion colors and textures. And no, not all succulents look spiky and dangerous. Many are soft-textured and very non-threatening. And whether grown in the ground or in containers, most are forgiving if you occasionally forget to water them. Cover your pool. By timing how long it takes to fill a five-gallon bucket, I was able to determine that one of my clients was using 1,200 gallons to raise the level of their pool up just one-half of a tile. Covering the pool, even with one of those floaty, bubble-wrap type pool covers, will reduce evaporation significantly.

The Little Things

Fix leaking hoses and nozzles. It could be that yours are leaking because their

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WE WON! 2013


Come in today and taste Santa Barbara’s Best!

Don’t let this happen to you! Check irrigation drip lines often for cuts, breaks and animal damage.

little rubber washers fell out. Put wells or berms around existing trees and shrubs. This allows the water to get down to where it’s needed with little or no runoff. If you have drip irrigation, regularly check all lines for breaks and holes. Animals often chew on them in order to get to the water inside. Emitters can break or pop out, causing the water to shoot out where you may not need it. Most important of all: Before you water anything, check the soil with your fingers, trowel or soil probe to see if it really is time to water. Keep in mind that it may be better to occasionally yet thoroughly water trees and shrubs, rather than frequently splashing everything just a little bit. This is probably obvious,


Sometimes it only takes a new rubber washer to stop that wasteful drip.

too, but after you’ve watered, you might want to check again with your fingers to determine whether the soil under the surface has actually gotten wet.  

Randy’s Quick Pick The Santa Barbara Rose Society will feature Oscar Carmona of Healing Grounds Nursery at its next meeting. Oscar will speak about biodynamic compost and other earth nurturing techniques. The meeting begins at 7 pm on February 13, at the Louise Lowry Davis Center at 1232 De La Vina Street in Santa Barbara. Guests are welcome.

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Jeff is a journalist, raconteur, autodidact, and polysyllable enthusiast. A long time resident of SB, he takes great delight in chronicling the lesser known facets of this gaudy jewel by the sea. Jeff can be reached at

...continued from COVER

The hardworking Hydro-Gritter does not live up to its space-age name, but performs a crucial function.

At a low-lying Santa Barbara spot between the Rescue Mission and Chase Palm Park is El Estero Wastewater Treatment Plant. Fast food grub or four-course fine dining, it all makes its way here, folks.

sandwiched between the Santa Barbara Rescue Mission and Chase Palm Park, is the unseen and unsung custodian of our town’s eight million daily gallons of sewage – the last bulwark between a downhill-racing tsunami of crap and the bright blue Pacific that would otherwise be its terminus. The lowest-lying point in Santa Barbara is said to be El Estero’s Influent Pump Station, the 60-foot-deep mechanized bore hole that is the nexus of SB’s sewer system, the drain into which the rank effluvium of 90,000 souls pours nonstop day and night, in a frothing torrent you have to see to believe. The rest of the compound, a collection of seemingly unrelated buildings, is a clanking, whirring Dr. Seuss pastiche of gravity separators, sludge thickeners, grit removers, bubbly merde suspenders, slime squeezers, heat exchangers and microbial poo eaters. Willy Wonka this ain’t.

E.E.W.W. I arrive at El Estero Wastewater on a Mortgage Solutions recent weekend afternoon with a head full of questions: how does it all tie together? Designed For You!

How are the liquids and solids separated? How much of the liquid is cycled back out to refresh our roses? Does the place ever break down? What role does microbial life play in the process? Is there a chance that I might be splashed with crap? “Hey. I’m Adam.” Senior Plant Operator Adam Munce, is a spirited, funny, lightly bearded and encyclopedically informed 30-something. He is also a Grade Five Wastewater Plant Operator, the highest classification. This means, apart from giving him the mojo to jump in with authority on those rare occasions the party chatter turns to wastewater, he is sufficiently versed in chemistry, mechanical engineering, water reclamation, microbiology and hydrophysics to keep the plant and its odd menagerie of systems operational. He’s a sort of scatological Renaissance Man. It is in his professional and personal interest to see to it that the stuff we Santa Barbarans expel into porcelain doesn’t pop up in the tidal shallows like a bobbing apple from hell. But how does all that biomass get here? We are standing outside the Influent Pump Station at the front of the

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compound. It is the first stop for the onrushing sewage, which enters the plant through four massive, underground trunk lines, narrows to two and streams into the 60-foot hole we’re about to descend. “You flush your toilet, it goes into the sewer line. It’s flowing by gravity to the plant,” says Munce. “That’s why in this building we have the lowest point in the city. Because it’s all flowing down into the plant.” It’s worth noting here that the two main objectives of El Estero, very generally speaking, are to clarify and concentrate. Incoming water-based stuff will be clarified and disinfected for the long tube ride out to sea and to our public parks and gardens. The frightening solid stuff will be collected and scraped and skimmed and pressed and massaged and fed to microgluttons whose feasting will chemically change the stuff from our base excrement into a beneficial, if unearthly, black jello. Following this very first introduction of sewage into the treatment regimen, the processes will separate as plainly as the fork in a road and proceed along the two aforementioned tracks, solid and liquid. Let’s be brave and go with the solid flow.

Remove the Goldfish!

Munce and I walk down two flights of stairs into the Influent Pump Station, a lavishly machined hole. Eau de toilette wafts gently on the air. At the bottom of the stairs is a loud, spooky, well-lit concrete chamber the size of a small bedroom. The floor of metal grating is suspended over a channel of swift-moving sewage that courses along beneath us like a foul River Styx, glittering blackly and rushing just underfoot. I stare straight down at Santa Barbara’s collective gastronomic soul pouring into this little cement room 40 feet underground. Whether these recent meals were Michelin-rated or something snagged at a drive-thru, the egalitarianism of the digestive process has made dark foamy mush of all of it. Hollow square columns in the room rise from floor to ceiling, longitudinal bar filters at their bases. The

mechanized whine of huge pumps can be heard nearby, not quite deafening. They will hoist the stuff back up to ground after this first treatment. “This is the main line coming in; this is the main gate,” Munce yells over the din. The metal filters screen out the larger pieces of trash: rags, jewelry, cash, tampons, the odd bewildered goldfish. The trash is screened out of the flow by the filters. When trash hits the screens, a flow differential is detected, cuing the automated elevators within the metal columns to hoist the common garbage to the surface where it is dumped into a contraption and scrubbed. “It’s like a giant washing machine. It’s called a washer-compactor,” says Munce. The showered and shampooed garbage is bagged, and Marborg comes and takes it away. Back downstairs, we pass through a door and take a gander at the beautiful new pumps that look like the subterranean machinery of the Krell in the sci-fi classic film Forbidden Planet – immense, shiny metal dynamos held fast with massive bolts. We descend one more level to the bottom of the hole, the dreaded Wet Well. Water Resources Technician Madeline Ward, with whom I’d arranged to visit the plant, had earlier warned me that, “We generally don’t take people down into the Wet Well unless they’re brave college kids… it is the rawest part of the plant, and even I try to avoid that place.” Lead on, Mr. Munce. Another flight down, more see-through metal flooring and another loud concrete room, this one deeper and that much closer to the bowels of the earth. This time, the maddened sewage is in plain sight, an amazing unshielded stinky bubbling primordial-seeming pool of gunk, a city’s intestinal secrets all gathered in one horrific, roiling pit. Majestic, in its way. The trash-free sewage next gets pumped up to the Grit Chamber. The water is ...continued p.38

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Chris Parker Austin Herlihy

Commercial Real Estate Agents with Radius Group who have completed over $550,000,000 in total transaction value and Leased/Sold over 2,000,000 SF since 2005. In 2012, along with Radius principle Steve Brown, the team completed 42 deals comprised of 19 sales and 23 lease transactions totaling $113.5 Million in sales volume and more than $21.5 Million in lease value upwards of 500,000 square feet.

2013: Another Big Year for Investor Sales


he local commercial real estate market undeniably has experienced steady growth since the “Great Recession” hit six years ago. Consider that in 2012 there were 85 sales transactions, up by 142% over 2009’s low of 35 and equaling 2005’s fifteen-year high. Last year’s haul came in just shy of that mark at 83 total commercial sales, as it was difficult to match the rush of transactions completed the final weeks of 2012 when many investors sought to escape the capital gains tax hikes of 2013. Sales activity has returned to prerecession levels, and investors are now purchasing prime property for record prices. As to be expected, record-high sales have taken place in the most desirable locations – including Montecito, State Street and the Funk Zone, led by the Old Firehouse building in Montecito’s upper village, which sold for a record $2,500/SF. Then there’s Santa Barbara’s “700 Club,” three deals from the past year involving local restaurants that passed under the public’s radar despite high price-per-square-foot sales figures, each around the $700 mark. In November, Rusty’s Pizza Parlor purchased a new location at 111 State Street, previously home to BeBop Burgers, for more than $700 per square foot with a $5,000,000 price tag. Similarly, in

December, Blush Restaurant & Lounge purchased its 4,000-square-foot space at 630 State for approximately $2.7 million (just under $700/square foot). And in the Funk Zone, 137 Anacapa Street – home to The Lark, Figueroa Mountain Brewing Co. and seven other tenants – sold in October to a local investor for more than $700 per square foot or $11.7 million. These are the highest prices per square foot we have seen in the area since 2007, with the Old Firehouse setting an all-time record high for Montecito. This begs the question: Are we seeing the same mistakes that got us into trouble in the first place? We believe the answer is no – and here’s why. – It seems the recession actually changed the psyche of investors. While buyers might be paying record numbers for properties, those numbers still have to make sense and the properties have to be well located. – For example, the Old Firehouse was bought for an enormous $2,500 per square foot (more than double the previous 2007 high for Montecito), but it was purchased at a 5.4% cap rate with a 15-year lease and an “A” credit tenant (Union Bank). – Additionally, Rusty’s Pizza paid a healthy figure for their building, but

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Montecito’s historic Old Firehouse building, which will remain leased to long-term tenant Union Bank, sold for $16 million to a pension fund, representing a 5.36% cap rate, in line with the market despite the hefty $2,516/SF.

Last November’s sale of the Marshalls building (formerly Borders bookstore) on State Street for $14.25 million may be followed by a handful of other high-profile transactions in the first quarter.

Rusty’s – which had been forced out of their Cabrillo building due to the Creek widening project – wisely understands the value of their new real estate, given the much-anticipated Entrada Hotel project nearby.

Going Forward In 2014, look for the improving commercial market to significantly impact the number of 1031 exchanges as sellers try to shelter their gains. Perhaps the biggest challenge we may face in the investment sales arena is compressed

inventory, making it more difficult for many sellers to find suitable exchange properties. More and more investors are competing for a limited supply of real estate in the Santa Barbara area, and we expect a number of large sales transactions to close escrow during the first half of the year. Overall, investment sales in 2014 should continue at a similar pace to 2013, and we may see more high-profile properties change hands like the Marshalls building on State Street this past November. 

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...continued from p.27

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It sounds weird now, but the word that kept coming to mind was “beautiful.” It was. For fun, I tried to simply get on the wall at the starting hold of a V7 Pablo and Mike had smoothly ascended. I couldn’t. The holds were impossibly small and difficult, and the footwork was beyond me. It was a humbling experience. And it was really, really fun. There were a few other climbers, adults and kids alike, in the gym that afternoon, and young Duke Lettieri, a twelve-yearold climbing teammate of Pablo’s from Olive Grove Charter School – also polite, also engaging and conversational and funny, also a heck of a climber – really said it best when I asked him about what seemed to be the solitary nature of climbing while Pablo was working through yet another impossible problem. “It’s not really a team sport like basketball or baseball or football,” Duke explained, smiling, “it’s more like a community sport.” Duke really captured it there, I thought. The folks in the gym that day were really supportive and friendly, taking time to talk between ascents about climbing, naturally, but about other things too. I got to spend some time with Pablo’s folks – both very cool, both climbers (Tim got Pablo started and they still climb outdoors together) – and learn about a local community that I know very little about. Thanks Mike, Pablo and everybody else I met at Santa Barbara Rock Gym. I appreciate your patience, and I had an absolute blast… even if I never made that V2 and literally couldn’t eat with a fork for two days given the consequent disfunctionality of my hands and forearms after a day trying to beat a lanky twelveyear-old kid up a wall. Anyway, Pablo, go get ‘em in Colorado Springs, man, you have a big fan in me and the Sentinel. Don’t forget to send us a cool photo of you nailing the big move in the finals, I know you will. I can’t wait to hear about it next time I see you in the gym.


Not surprisingly, I like Santa Barbara Rock Gym. Mike O’Connor and Pablo Hammack really showed me the ropes – well, there’re no ropes in bouldering but you get the idea – and I highly recommend it for adults and kids alike. You can rope up and learn

the basics of belaying and top-roping, you can try your hand (and forearms) at the art of bouldering and you can and will have a great time. Check out www. for details, or call (805) 770-3225. Best might be to just stop in to 322 State Street, Monday – Friday (12 – 10pm) or Saturday (10am – 9pm) or Sunday (10am – 8pm). Have fun. I also like Mountain Air Sports. Ken Duddridge and the gang support Pablo and Pablo, in turn, supports them. (“I like to support local businesses,” Pablo, 12, told me, very matter-of-factly. Great kid.) Get your climbing gear or anything else you need for the mountains or the weather or the water at Mountain Air Sports.; (805) 962-0049; 14 State Street. Switching gears, I had a wonderful night a couple (few?) weeks back at SOhO experiencing, for the second time in as many years, the UCSB Spoken Word troupe. The crew is just terrific, and they are pretty damned polished performers. (If you get the chance, check them out. Worth it.) In that same vein, UCSB’s Multicultural Center is bringing twotime National Poetry Slam Champion and winner of the International World Cup of Slam Poetry Anis Mojgani to town for a one-night-only show in which he will perform a selection of his critically acclaimed work. Anis is maybe the greatest spoken word poet of his generation, and he’ll be right here at Granada Books at 1224 State ( on February 13, at 7:30pm. It’s a free event, so you’d better get there early. I sure will. Finally, I absolutely love that we are putting this edition of the Sentinel out while my family and I take some much-deserved time off (if I might say so myself ) down in Placencia, Belize. Thanks Publisher Tim and Designer Trent and everybody else in the Sentinel family who helped make it possible. Thanks also to a special friend that helped us find Wild Orchid – it’s not a bad spot to hang the old Mazza family hat as we explore a new place. (Read: We lucked out and are eternally grateful. Check it out if you are interested at More on all that next issue. For now, everybody, have a great bi-week. My wife just ordered me a Pina Colada. Awnd the sea is calling. Oh, shoot, that’s the kids screaming. Gotta go! 


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sets in early, before giving way to intrigue and enchantment.

by James Luksic A longtime writer, editor and film critic, James has

worked nationwide for several websites and publications – including the Dayton Daily News, Key West Citizen, Topeka Capital-Journal and Santa Ynez Valley Journal. California is his eighth state. When he isn’t watching movies or sports around the Central Coast, you can find James writing and reading while he enjoys coffee and bacon, or Coke and pizza.

Best Picture… Or Not


pon further review: There was no better movie last year than Dallas Buyers Club. Having seen it a second time, I emerged even more impressed than after the initial viewing. The surge of support behind co-stars Matthew McConaughey and Jared Leto is well deserved; both actors should secure gold statuettes on March 2. But there is so much more to the story, the filmmaking, its editing and cinematography. Some of its most poignant moments are brief and fleeting. I suspect most members of the Academy are compelled to go along with the groundswell of support for American Hustle or perhaps feel a societal obligation to favor 12 Years A Slave. In turn, Club will be the finest film since Mystic River – a decade ago – not to win Best Picture. Among the smattering of new mainstream arrivals, I endured the poorly titled Labor Day, which has earnest acting and chemistry to burn between Josh Brolin and Kate Winslet, but little else to recommend (unless you’re interested in making peach pies); I also made it through That Awkward Moment, an awkward and shallow romantic-comedy suitable for Zac Efron fans but nobody else. Meanwhile, elsewhere on the cinematic front:

Her and Him

The simply titled Her is director Spike Jonze’s oddest picture, which is quite a feat for the man whose repertoire includes Being John Malkovich and his career pinnacle, Adaptation. In this one, a shy and lonely writer (Joaquin Phoenix) falls in love with his computer’s operating system. And who can honestly blame him, given the machine’s voice is that of Scarlett Johansson? (The beauty is heard but never seen, which strikes me as the real tragedy.) Some say this dramedy works as a cautionary tale, a 21stcentury romance. Whether it’s an accurate windsock of where “love” (and surrogate sex) takes us in the near future remains to be seen. The production is at turns dumbfounding and intoxicating – especially when the cameras float on rooftops and balconies, with modernistic, Shanghai-style backdrops. Phoenix remains altogether believable even when the material isn’t. If it’s too conceptual and difficult to swallow – I had trouble buying the titular heroine’s so-called feelings – the narrative stumbles out of the gate but soon strikes a beguiling balance. Boredom

Any Port in A Storm

The gritty Gimme Shelter chronicles a pregnant teen with a boyish haircut (Vanessa Hudgens or “Smudgens,” given her grimy face) who flees her abusive, drug-stuffed mom (a ferocious Rosario Dawson) and ends up in a women’s shelter. The particulars – including the fact that her biological father is an affluent stockbroker (Brendan Fraser) – don’t always resonate and seem to be derived from standard stock found on the Hallmark Channel. We witness convincing touches centered around themes of pride, dignity and self-worth that strike a balance with the predictable pap through which all cast members often slog.

Due or Die

Devil’s Due is yet another hellraising hybrid of Paranormal Activity and The Exorcist that relies on a hand-held videocamera in lieu of actual cinematography and direction. In this instance, a newlywed couple returns from a whirlwind honeymoon in Santo Domingo, only to discover the wife is carrying a demon baby. The husband, meanwhile, carries a demon camcorder anywhere and everywhere – which proves creepier than anything else – without repercussions. (Why his spouse allows the intrusive instrument 24/7 defies comprehension.) A few scattered frissons that provide mild jolts aren’t enough to offset the derived lunacy and overall homemovie feel. 







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...continued from p.7 pretty mellow). A full-scale brawl broke out one afternoon between a motorist who was trying to go around two guys riding side by side on a narrow stretch of road and one of the more, ah, pompous, wildly hostile testosterone-saturated riders in a colorful tight outfit and bright bandana under his time trial helmet. The cyclist was screaming profanities, the really bad ones, and my daughters, who’d been innocently playing in the yard, were staring, eyes wide and mouths open, at the embarrassingly ridiculous scene involving grown men acting like misbehaved children in front of the house. I actually had to run up to them, quietly advise that children were watching and they were acting like fools, and politely ask them to move on. The driver apologized and drove away. The cyclist never stopped screaming profanities and squirting his little water bottle at the car. If I were a Crimetime fan I’d seriously consider whether the cyclist was high on methamphetamines; there was really no other explanation for his belligerence. I like riding; in fact, I do it reasonably regularly (though, admittedly, not often on the road, and never in those hyper-specialized outfits). I also like driving, which I also do quite a bit of, and generally don’t get too worked up about folks on bikes, even when they run a light or whatever. (Come on. Who among us hasn’t broken a traffic law on a bike?) I guess I just don’t have the mental energy to spend worrying about how others choose to operate a car or a bike. (Unless they are harming my children or others with vulgar profanities, I suppose.) Call me crazy. Can’t we all just get along? – MSM)

The Capitalist: Evil Lizard Person?

Jeff Harding, your Weekly Capitalist, is part of the reason why so many people find it so easy to believe that the world is actually run by giant shape-changing evil lizard people from another dimension. I have my own moments of doubt, but hey, I’m homeless, and that’s how we roll. Of course with typical provincialism I suppose we should all trust Harding’s views in the Sentinel over Paul Krugman’s in The New York Times because Harding lives in Montecito and has even earned that extremely difficult achievement of having a blog whereas that other guy and his obviously communist beard only won a Nobel Prize and stuff. Far from falling short of definitive answers, real economists (as opposed to real estate agents, with blogs) are coming up with pretty definitive and compelling reasons why inequality is a problem and why it exists. (Compare Harding’s Wealth Inequality? So What., Vol. 3, Issue 2.) Robert Reich (just a Presidential advisor, granted, but I think he might have a blog too) has a new movie out called Inequality for All which you might guess from the title touches on this issue. One of the things he points out may have been


a problem is that a lot of what used to be jobs that would support a family now pay less than what they did in the 1970s, while costs have gone up and so now can’t even support a decent dating life. There are also factors like the pay ratio in America of the highest to lowest paid workers being something like 400 to 1, which is at least an order of magnitude higher than most of the other countries in the world. We are going through an economic recovery right now where 90% of people got poorer, but oh yeah, everything is fine. Sorry about the mess, I’ve been molting. As far as wealth redistribution having been tried and failed, Harding gives no specific examples, and that’s because there aren’t any. Or if he’s just trying to use the old saw “Socialism doesn’t work,” I think Germany might disagree with him. Along with Sweden, Norway and Denmark. Heck, even the BBC makes for more socialism in the UK than we have ever tried in the U.S., though admittedly the way they brought Sherlock back to life without really explaining it was a bit of a let down. (Maybe if Downton Abbey doesn’t pick up its pace I will concede the point.) Actually though, we do have socialism in America. We just have it for banks and oil companies and all kinds of corporations that get refunds on taxes they don’t pay. They think socialism works great! Admittedly, I am hoping that the wealthy and their lackeys continue to live in this profound state of denial, because this increasing lack of insight into the moods and needs of the country is a distinct weakness on their part, regardless of how many blogs they have. In thirty to forty years when these issues have been solved (as I do not believe it can continue like this much longer) columns like Harding’s will have a distinct tone of “let them eat cake” and they will either have to accept that a 5% increase on the top tax rate is not class warfare or get back in their flying saucers and go home. Mac McGill, Guy With A Blog Santa Barbara (Editor’s Note: Hmmm. Mac’s moved on to Mr. Harding. I almost feel betrayed. Almost. – MSM) (Jeff Harding’s Note: Before I begin, it’s important to note that this is the most difficult letter I have to deal with (among many this week). Mac writes us a lot. His letter is difficult because Mac is homeless. Mac writes about his situation in his blog ( It is a painful read, but read it I did. And it affected the manner in which I respond below. Before I begin, I wish to point out that Mac did not come from poverty and actually went to a private boarding school. He also has training in culinary arts. He belongs to a gym and works out. He has a laptop, writes well and is obviously a bright guy. Perhaps someday he will explain his situation. Regardless, here goes. Dear Mac, thank you for your letter. In

order to get some insight into you I checked out your blog, which I found well written but often hard to read or view (in the case of your videos). Thank you for providing some insight into your world; it is a sad tale. You will probably reject my sympathies and believe I have no right to feel sorry for you, or that I have no right to judge you, or that I probably don’t understand your situation, or that you think I am an arrogant rich prick who doesn’t have a clue what’s going on in your world, or that I am the problem, not the solution. Fine. But as a fellow human being I am moved by your poverty, your obvious pain, your nihilism, your depression and your hopelessness. I didn’t read everything in your blog but enough, I think, to be judgmental about your situation. Like it or not, Mac, people are going to judge you by what you do and say. Like most people, I can’t help but think, What a waste of humanity. Instead of ranting at the world to cover up the pain of being homeless, why don’t you walk into one of the many agencies that are available to the homeless? You have obvious ability and intelligence and we would all like to see you develop into a productive citizen. Maybe you think that is all BS and a plot by The Rich to enslave you, but you would be mistaken there. Most folks want to help you. That said, I urge you to seek help from the community. Please. You can regain your life. Please also see my answer to Jamie Guerra’s letter, below. Much of it applies to you. Your letter may be cathartic for you, but you’re not helping anything, especially yourself. In your letter you blame free-market types like me for ruining the world. I’ll ignore the ad hominem comments and try to address your criticisms of free market capitalism. And FYI, I am not a real estate broker. Your first criticism is that I, Jeff Harding, have the gall to criticize Nobel Prize winner in economics, Paul Krugman. Fair enough. I am an economics student and writer and don’t have any prizes. But surely you would not put all your eggs in the Nobel basket would you? If so you would have to take issue with those free market types who have won the Nobel, like my guy, Friedrich von Hayek, and others. Hayek in his day eviscerated (remember that word?) Lord Keynes’s theories. Krugman is a well known Keynesian. So are most of the folks behind the Nobel. As to Robert Reich, you should be aware that he is NOT an economist, thus you could put him on par with me (I also hold a doctorate degree not in economics yet write about it). I have viewed Reich’s video and have followed him for years and he is wrong on almost everything economic. His views on middle class income stagnation are also wrong. Studies show that from 1979 to 2007, income for average households adjusted for inflation actually rose about 37%. There are lots of reasons for this, but the Congressional Budget Office study in 2011 agrees with this fact. So let me say that not only does Krugman not know what he is

talking about, that goes doubly so for Reich. Contrary to what you say, wealth redistribution and socialism have been tried, and they have failed. (See all communist countries, for example.) Even with a command-based, totalitarian governmentrun economy, it failed. You could also take the UK. Socialism took hold in the beginning of the last century with the rise of the Labor Party and failed. The economy became mired in economic stagnation and was falling apart. Mrs. Thatcher came in and changed that and the country has rather prospered since then, except for the meddling that caused the booms and busts. The “successful” socialist countries that you mention, Sweden, Norway and Denmark, aren’t exactly sterling examples of that which you’d like them to stand for, either. I know, for instance, that Sweden has liberalized its economy since it ran into the same problems as the UK. They lowered taxes, relaxed regulations and turned to free market solutions to cure inefficient state-run enterprises. And guess what? They are doing much, much better. Norway is a petro-state and was stagnating before North Sea oil revenue came into their coffers. Germany had a post-War economic miracle (Wirtschaftswunder) because of very free market economic policies established by Ludwig Erhard. He was one of my people. Ask why they are doing better than post-War socialist France. The answer is simple: Socialism has never worked, and it never will. As a “lackey” of the “wealthy” (as you put it), my goal as a writer is to change views of people attracted to economic ideas that only result in poverty and misery, like socialism. You would be mistaken if you believed that what is happening today is the result of free market capitalism. If you think redistributing wealth is the solution, then, as Maggie Thatcher famously noted, what happens when you run out of other people’s money? – Jeffrey Harding)

The 99.9999999999…%ers

Hi Matt. Jeff Harding, a shock-jock who often goes way over the top (which is, frankly, stupid), actually cogently rebuts the “income inequality” BS in his recent column. (Wealth Inequality? So what., Vol. 3, Issue 2.) As an aside, I wince when I drive down upper Anacapa Street and see a sign on the lawn of a semi-mansion that reads “we are 98%’ers.” I want to stop and remind them that they are better off than 99.9999999999…..% of the people living on this planet. They should spend a little time in the slums of Mumbai, as you and I have, then stop whining. But I am rambling on. Best wishes. Ken W. Santa Barbara (Editor’s Note: Indeed, Ken, they should. I’m right with you there. But, for the record, I don’t think Harding is a shock-jock in any negative sense; I see him as an intelligent guy with strong views on a tough set of issues that tend to polarize.

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At least he’s willing to stand up on that soapbox and argue his perspective with some passion and factual data. Frankly, that’s just the kind of discourse we need if we want to better understand those with opposing views and reach real, viable solutions. So maybe I’ll be the lone voice in saying thanks, Jeff (and the letter writers above), for raising some important issues and working them through. Take out the lizards and the lackeys and the personal attacks and that’s a rather enjoyable little exchange. Good stuff. I appreciate the letter, Ken, keep reading and keep writing. – MSM)

Is This the Economist’s Version of Piling On?

Jeff, I have enjoyed your exchanges with Jamie Guerra over economics, and I’d like to take the baton over your recent inequality column. My problem is that being a capitalist I have a lot of sympathy for many of your positions (capitalism being the best creator of wealth and human advancement, the folly of the Fed’s market manipulations in recent decades, politicians using this issue to build their power, the negative impact of large numbers of single moms, etc.). But I do think your column ignores some real issues. There were decades (1950-1980) when the gains of that wealth increase were shared relatively equally, but Paul Krugman and Robert Reich are not wrong in saying that the benefits of recent wealth gains are not being shared proportionally. Reasons for this are complex in my view but include progressive taxation policies, rules regarding unionization, the destruction of manufacturing in the U.S., etc. We also began worshipping the rich (having learned nothing from The Gilded Age) and many embracing an Ayn Randvision of achievers and moochers. I don’t think we can just pass one law to deal with this and confiscatory top taxation rates won’t work anymore. But if the populace that votes feel the system is skewed to reward only those who already HAVE and that America is no longer a land of opportunity, we will not continue to grow as a nation. Innovation will wither, education is already becoming a too expensive proposition for many, and large parts of the U.S. have an economy that resembles a Third World country. So many expecting handouts have been trained by the Wall Street and Car Manufacturer bailouts to see government as their ONLY hope. It is indeed a sad state of affairs. Pete Tittl Santa Barbara (Editor’s Note: This is fun. I’m taking the bi-week off, Jeff, ok? Thanks. Separately, I challenge any one of you still reading to deny that The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged aren’t two of the most amazing books on the planet, even if you don’t agree with Ms. Rand’s philosophical

leanings. If you haven’t read them, I say run down to your favorite local book store and grab the former, and when you’ve finished chewing on it, go back and grab the latter. Anywho, heeeeeeeeere’s, Jeffrey! – Howard Roark) (Jeffrey Harding’s Response: Dear Peter, thank you very much for your response. You bring up some very interesting points about the economy and society. If I may paraphrase, it seems you agree with most of my comments about wealth and income inequality, but you feel that recently the economy is skewed to the rich and, if most folks believe that this is not the land of opportunity, then we are headed for a decline which would lead to a dangerous rise in the power of the State. I would agree with you that, until about 2000, most Americans were doing relatively well. I think most people admired people like Bill Gates and Steve Jobs even though they were fabulously rich, because of what they did for society. Why then, since 2000 has the economy seemed to favor the rich? I used to write about this quite a bit in my blogging days. I coined the term “bifurcated economy,” which referred to that fact that the rich, especially the financial class and the government bailees, were doing very well while the rest of us were struggling to pay off debt, stay in our homes and keep (or find) jobs. There is a complicated free market answer to all this. The view is that the Fed created the boom and bust business cycles that have wracked the economy post-2000. During each cycle valuable capital (i.e., real wealth such as homes, factories, capital equipment and savings) was destroyed with little new real capital invested to replace it. The Fed’s money printing is not real wealth and cannot support lasting growth. Instead, the new Fed money has gone into Wall Street and the Crony Capitalists (e.g., auto manufacturers and their unions) rather than Main Street. The new boom will certainly end in bust. This isn’t good and the real question is: How do you create lasting real wealth, organic growth and lasting jobs? The answer is that only real savings, not printed paper, will fund sustainable growth. Spending is not our salvation. Saving is. That way the market directs capital to what people want, not what the bureaucrats want, and growth results and everyone prospers. This is a quick answer, Peter, to a complex issue. But I agree with you that further government control of the economy will only make things worse. Keep sending those cards and letters! – Jeffrey Harding)

and continue to do so. Jeff certainly gets some interesting commentary, especially by people who don’t seem to pay too much attention to facts and what Jeff has actually said. These rebuttals to his comments are perhaps more interesting as the emotions are flying.  But what I have found out about Jeff is that he does the research and his facts are very buttoned up. It is refreshing to have an alternative view that is well supported and clearly communicated.  For that I am grateful, as we all should be. In conclusion, I will continue to browse through your now bi-weekly paper to check out his column, the opinions submitted, and other interesting items – so thanks. Best of luck to the Sentinel. Ed McLaughlin III Santa Barbara (Editor’s Note: That’s terrific, Ed, I couldn’t have said it better myself. (In fact, I said it rather worse myself in response to Ken W.’s letter above.) Please do keep picking us up and browsing, that’s the whole idea. – MSM)

I’m Considering a Boxing Match with a Woman

Hi Matt, great paper, look forward to it each time. I’m at Santa Barbara Athletic Club most days having all kinds of fun, often reading the Sentinel. I haven’t seen you there, which makes me wonder if you’re spending all your time reading/hiding/ relaxing in the sauna? (Not that that’s such a bad thing). But there are so many more fun things to do: Like squash! SGT’s! Boxing! Spinning! Dancing! I know you like working out hard, so what’s keeping you away from the more challenging events at the club? SBAC has some of the most difficult and fun classes in town! If you haven’t taken any of the advanced SGT’s check them out. Talk to David K. or Tom, they might give you some free time in there. But be warned, it’s addicting.

Praise for the Capitalist

Matt, a couple of months ago a friend told me that Jeff Harding was now writing for the Sentinel. As I had always enjoyed his blog, The Daily Capitalist, I started picking up your paper along with the Montecito Journal and Casa

Stearns Wharf at Dawn (photo credit: Ron Atwood)

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One rainy Saturday morning when you can’t go out for a ride, I dare you to show up at 8am for Natalie’s boxing class then follow it with the 9:15am boot camp. By 10:30 you will be feeling so good! You can dance with Karina or hit the sauna after and still have plenty of time to meet your family for lunch. And you already told us you like Sergio (of Hazards Cyclesport). We do too! Do you know he teaches several spin classes at SBAC? When you’re squeezed for time and need a quick endorphin high his class is guaranteed to please! Keep up the good work. Have fun! Lara Garofono Santa Barbara (Editor’s Note: All right, Lara, you caught me… I haven’t been in for awhile. And honestly, I have no idea what a SGT is. But spinning with Serge? Boxing with Natalie? Dancing with Karina? Sounds great. And to think I thought it was all lap pool and sauna. Shows you how much I know. I’ll be in soon, and I’ll be looking for you in that boxing class. Thanks for writing and keeping me motivated. – MSM)

Paradise by the Pacific

Hi Matt, it’s a new day, a new issue, and we’ve only just begun a new year. Many of us average folk here are probably wondering how to balance the budget as the holiday and gift-giving hangover really sets in. We fret about the high cost of living in Paradise by the Pacific, and for good reason. And yet it is indeed a paradise all its own and I am glad to be a part of it. Just take a look at this shot of the Wharf last Sunday. Hope to all whose businesses or jobs make it possible to sustain and, with persistence, make the blessings worth the struggle. All the best, Ron Atwood Santa Barbara (Editor’s Note: I missed you last issue, Ron, thanks for writing in and, of course, for the terrific shot. Please do keep sending them, I love ending the Letters section like this. Peace. – MSM) 

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...continued from p.32

Here the drained tank shows microbe-pleasing aeration blowers.

This machine makes a final attempt to squeeze moisture from the sludge.

slowed way down and filled with fizzy bubbles that scrub the poop off the grit and sand that also flows through our sewers with every flush. The Grit Chamber then puts the smelly stuff in suspension while the rocky stuff falls. After that, it goes to a goofy-looking machine called the Hydro-Gritter, which, it must be said, looks a little worse for the wear, a bit like a rusting, high school science project. A cyclonic water effect inside the HydroGritter centrifugally separates the fine dirt and sand from the water, and then a slowpoke augur inside the lower housing turns like a screw and lifts the separated sand and other non-poop gunk out of the tank and deposits it down a separate chute. There is only one Hydro-Gritter and that’s an anomaly here. In the non-stop world of sewage treatment, redundancy is all. Should a major link in the chain fail at El Estero, its mechanical twin steps in and takes up the task without blinking. The whole of the plant features this sort of doubling up. One thing you don’t want is sewage running amok because something breaks and you have to turn off the city’s wastewater processing plant to make a repair. Ongoing repairs and improvements to a system whose technologies are everchanging and updating must take place in a never-ending round-robin fashion. This plant can’t be shut down. Ever. It’s a challenge.

Little Green Vikings

Now that the crap-filled water has been picked free of trash and clarified of most of the sand, it’s time to feed it to the Beasties. We climb some steps and stand on a concrete-and-metal acre or so of waterfilled troughs. Some of the troughs are placid and smooth as glass, some bubbling and covered with a disgusting grey foam that looks like the head on a pint of Guinness, if Guinness were feces-based. This is where last night’s Quarter Pounder with Cheese orgy begins its reincarnation as a friend of the Earth. “Primary process is where we began to

separate out the organic solids,” Munce explains. “All we were doing was slowing down the velocity of the water so that stuff would sink or float. We keep it in these retention tanks for about an hour.” Munce gestures at a foamy trough, open to the sky. The trough is full of living things – marauding and rude and singleminded living things, bless them. Here, the inert sludge we have been at such pains to clean and collect is about to be introduced to some starving bugs and a kind of magic is about to happen. That is, huge tanks full of microbes are awaiting their orders. “The water flows out of the primaries and into the reactor. This is an aerobic process,” Munce explains. Meaning, the microbes in the reactor breathe oxygen and the more full of oxygen they are, the more feverishly they go to work on the slime banquet that is their bread and butter. It’s not easy getting all that oxygen into the bug environment down there. “The pumping of the air is very inefficient,” Munce notes, in a disappointed tone. “Since air is only 20 percent oxygen, you have to pump a ton of air to get that water oxygenated enough to keep the bugs happy. Some plants use pure oxygen to make the process more efficient. But pure oxygen is explosive. It’s a balance.” The bugs, giddy at the amount of oxygen and food in the water, go mad eating the stuff in the water. “When the stuff settles, the scrapers scrape it away to automated hoppers that collect it, and those solids get sent on to a refining process and then on to the Digesters,” Munce says casually. At this point, we are looking at an Activated Sludge Process. In this exotic setting, Activated Sludge is not an oxymoron – “activated” means living. And while the idea of living sludge might conjure up 1950s B-grade horror flicks, the fact is, we are already surrounded by activated sludge in our lakes, streams, oceans and Titleist-clogged water hazards. Out there, pillaging, Viking-like

This is the liquid result of the anaerobic digestion process. And a solid reason to buy a new pair of boots.

microbes eat away at nature’s sludgy refuse, doing their best to filter, ingest and change stuff for the benefit of the environment. Activating the sludge here at El Estero, under these controlled conditions, is simply mimicking in vastly accelerated fashion what Mother Nature does when given half a chance. “There’s tons of different kinds of bugs for the activated sludge process,“ Munce says as we stare at the bubbling scum. “Depending on how much air you give them and how long you allow them to be in the system, it gives you different kinds of bugs for different kinds of treatment. We have anoxic selectors that allow you to control the ratio of air-to-food and so select what kinds of bacteria are present; it’s super complicated. This is a giant science experiment. The bugs are trying to live with each other, but they’re also fighting each other for food. You just want to keep the right bugs happy so they’ll do what you want them to do.” Next, the sated bugs are sent to another trough, a quiet one absent the overexciting bubble action. Their big ol’ bellies drag them en masse to the bottom, and they are allowed to rest and digest. This bottom-covering matrix of slime and

sated bugs is Activated Sludge. “Soon, they’re starting to get hungry again,“ Munce says enthusiastically. “So we pump them back through the system – the Return Activated Sludge Process – they have fresh food, they have oxygen. It’s time to eat again, boys!” As the process continues, a certain amount of bacteria has to be drawn off and removed as Waste Activated Sludge or it will replicate until the entire plant clogs up with frisky and polygamous bacteria. “They’re sent off to die,” as Munce puts it with nary a hint of emotion. I stare across the various troughs, thinking of the generations of bacteria living and dying and dating and consummating; a Sidney Sheldon novel, but with very small characters. Life. What an inexplicable wonder. In one of the tanks, some ducks and a filthy-looking gull are paddling around in the smelly poop-infused water.

Reclaiming a City’s Slop

The main struggle with the sludge, believe it or not, is to thicken it, to get as much water out of it as possible. One of the last stops before the sludge goes to the patiently waiting Anaerobic Digesters is

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Just another day at the office for Senior Plant Operator Adam Munce. Pipes the exact color of Pepto-Bismol… coincidence? This importantlooking tube is the only exit to the sea from El Estero. Water is given a final physical and heads offshore 1.5 miles, where it is gently diffused into the undersea environment.

This is not the kind of bubble bath you want to slip into at the end of a long day.

the Dissolved Air Flotation. Here, micro bubbles are introduced to the sludge. The sludge sticks to the bubbles and is extracted, leaving more water behind. This thickened sludge now has its final dance with the microbes as it is fed to the Anaerobic Digesters. These bacteria are not oxygen-breathing (hence the prefix “an” before “aerobic”). When our poop is finally introduced to the Anaerobic Digesters’ chambers, we can imagine it as a sort of joyous reunion of our scat with the bugs that most adore it – these bugs are the same as those that roam so usefully through our tightly wound intestines. The monstrous vats that hold the Digesters must be kept at a constant 98.6 degrees. They think they are in an intestinal tract, and it is not in our interest to disabuse them of that idea. The Anaerobic Digesters in their airless chamber work at the sludge for 30 days, by which time they have, through the awe and mystery of chemistry, turned the awful stuff you couldn’t bear to contemplate as it swirled down the john into an odorless nutrient-rich digestate that has many uses, not the least of which is a super-food for plants (though not the edible kind, in case you’re eating broccoli as you read this). The process of anaerobic digestion also happily produces a renewable energy source as the rude little animals emit a biogas in the course of all their munching.

Or, as Munce indelicately puts it, “These are the same bugs that make you fart.” The emitted gas byproduct, which is around 67 percent methane, is scrubbed and fired and used to heat the 98.6-degree environment the Digesters insist upon in order to do their awesome and mildly yucky work. Which is to say the bugs are heating their home with their own rear ends. Finally, the thoroughly worked-over solids are pushed to still more tanks where a polymer, a sort of long, stringy macromolecule, is added to thicken the fertilizer-grade sludge further through a coagulation and draining process called Dewatering. This thick stuff, which “looks like black cottage cheese” according to my host, is then squeezed through rollers and still more stubbornly clinging water is pushed through a permeable belt. The remaining semisolid is stored on site in what is called the Sludge Bay and later hauled off in trucks for composting. “This is the poop of the City of Santa Barbara turned into something really useful!” I gush. “Yep,” Munce says. “This is what I like. It’s weird stuff. It looks like dirt, but it wiggles. It’s only about 15-percent solid.” He courageously nudges the huge pile of it with his work boot, and the whole mass wobbles like two tons of Jell-O. “Lots of times, seeds that come through

The End: Your bathroom emergency as a gift to Gaia.

the whole process remain viable,” Munce says, “and you get these amazing tomato plants, pepper plants, just shooting up out of this stuff.” Aside from doing Santa Barbara’s dirty work, El Estero is also a Reclaimed Water Exhibit, a demonstration garden to show the public that plants do just fine and even thrive with reclaimed water. The landscaping at El Estero is gorgeous and robust. Munce says sometimes a bit of this proto-mulch will spill along the side of the driveway into the dirt when trucks are being loaded and a huge plant will just

sprout there overnight. I notice the stuff doesn’t smell. “All the stink has been digested out of it,” Munce says. “And you can pump this stuff, like concrete. It’s a weird material.” I lean in a last time to stare. “Go ahead, you can grab a handful,” says Munce. “It won’t hurt you.” This article was done in collaboration with Mission and State, a nonprofit initiative dedicated to bringing Santa Barbara in-depth journalism. For more, go to  

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You Have Your Hands Full by Mara Peters Former editor for the fashion/lifestyle section of the New York

Post, Mara moved to London and worked as a contributing editor for the Daily Mail’s You Magazine, freelancing for Look Magazine, NY Post and the Style Magazine for The Sunday Times. To remain sane during diaper years she writes a mommy blog, You Have Your Hands Full –

Exaggerating Growing Pains


harlie is going through puberty. I know, I know. The facts don’t add up. The kid is only four. But he’s showing all the signs. And I’m a tabloid journalist at heart, so you need to go with me on this. He’s locking the bathroom door when he takes a bath (versus last month when he took a bath with his brother and sister religiously). He’s having “private” conversations with Teddy about a girl named Violet at pre-school. He rolls his eyes when I say something silly. And, for the ultimate proof, he has started using hair gel. “I think we got a ripple effect going here,” Alpha said as he brushed his teeth while watching all three boys – 12, 8 and 4 – smear gel in their hair. My problem is that I can only take one (Jackson) legitimately going through puberty at a time, not all three at once. Nobody could handle that. And yet, almost inexplicably, that is precisely where I find myself.

Jackson Has a ’Stache

It started about five months ago. I was picking them up at school and Jackson jumped into the front seat, flashed a huge grin and said, “Hi Mom.” I looked at him, really looked at him, and nothing seemed

Charlie uses hair gel for pre-school. Super.

different. It was just that the pitch of his voice was several octaves lower. Thinking I might be mistaken, I turned to Teddy. “Teddy, say ‘Hi Mom,’” I insisted. His variation was similar to that of Olivia’s. My mind raced for the entire car ride. Secretly glancing over at Jackson from the side, I saw the beginnings of the ‘stache above his lip. Was that there this morning? How did I not notice?


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That’s when I started to tune in all my senses. First and foremost, there’s that smell. Get three boys going through puberty in the car for a post-sports carpool and, well, it’s deadly. I had to institute a Windows Down policy. Instead of making a big deal of what is in fact inevitable, I chose to ignore his current state. My approach is to stay as even as possible as he swings from rock star one minute to a blubbering wreck the next. Half the time he’s telling me, “You just don’t understand me,” and, the truth is, he is kind of right. For instance, we had to go to Macy’s to buy a necklace for his “girlfriend” for Christmas. I’ve passed the two together at school and they can’t even say “hi” to each other in the halls; but there we were, Olivia and I, helping him pick out a present. Then things really went haywire in our house. Teddy and Charlie started to ask for the gel. They took longer to get dressed in the morning for school. Teddy started a fashion movement in the 3rd grade of longer, crazier socks with shorts. He started to strut. Which is really great, I think – if he wasn’t just trying to be his older brother. Part of me wonders if something in the universe (maybe God) is trying to tell me to pay more attention. Maybe, by exaggerating all the signs of puberty in triplicate, that something is signaling me to notice my oldest is growing up. But, to be honest, I don’t know how to handle Jackson turning into a young man. There is so much joy in watching him grow taller, stronger and more confident – but there is also something quite scary about it. We’ve begun talking about cellphone etiquette, as I promised on his 6th grade graduation he’d get his own. I’m having frank conversations about Justin Bieber and drug use with him. I notice that his friends are becoming more essential in his life, and “family time” is tolerated but not

really embraced. I just toured junior high schools for next year. Instead of tuning in as the principals talked about the programs and lunch policies, my eyes kept wandering to the students. They are even taller. And they look so much older. How could Jackson possibly be ready for this?

Charlie and the Hair Gel Factory Now, back to pubescent Charlie. There I was, putting his lunch away at preschool. Watching him in his ridiculous outfit of a tank top (“To show off my biceps, Mom”) and sports shorts with lacrosse high socks. His hair was straight up in front (picture a There’s Something About Mary look and you’ll be in the right feel). He went racing up the ramp with all his friends to open the door to school. But suddenly he stopped in his tracks, spun around, raced back to me and jumped into my arms. “Mom! I forgot to tell you I love you!” he giggled as all his friends patiently waited. I hugged him tight, patted down his gelled hair and realized we still have some time. 

Peters’ Pick


here is not a whole lot of Namaste in this workout. As a matter of fact, when I am doing my 100th crunch of the hour, I really wonder how they call this yoga. Sure there is a simple flow, but the tone is more “boot camp” than finding your Zen. And right when I can’t take it anymore – the heat is too much, the flow is too hard – I am lying on my mat in shavasana, staring at the ceiling with not one thought going through my head other than gratitude that it is over. And then something crazy happens. Two hours after class, I feel my body almost sing, it’s so open and limber. My spirituality flows as my mind and body connect. That’s what I call yoga. Core Power Yoga, 1129 State Street, (805) 884-9642,

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SANTA Byo urARBARA S KINNY gui de to




Let’s Get Fired Up!

By Sarah Dodge ill this be the spring you take your running or walking routine from just lukewarm to smoking hot? If the organizers of the Girl on Fire 5K & 10K have anything to say about it, then the answer is absolutely yes! Taking place on March 8, at Leadbetter Beach, this race is sure to get you all fired up. What’s even hotter is that you are welcome to join Girl on Fire at their trainings every Saturday around Santa Barbara whether you sign up for the actual race (we highly suggest you do) or not. Just check their Facebook page for locations and times. Created by a group of friends wanting to celebrate the woman who is not afraid of taking risks or letting her spirit run free, this race is open to everyone, including men, and comes complete with a finisher’s medal, mini cupcakes, entertainment by The Caverns and a Figueroa Mountain brew for all participants over 21. A portion of the race proceeds will go to the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society, which has been selected as the benefiting charity for the 2014 Girl on Fire 5K & 10K race. This race caps at 500 participants and we hear there’s just about a hundred spots left. So get moving and light that fire fast!


WINE & DINE Apero Anytime

By Eve Sommer-Belin rench slang for pre-dinner (or pre-lunch, for that matter) drinks – apéritif – Apéro Bar is State Street’s newest eating place. Located in the heart of downtown, Apéro’s space opens right out onto State, providing great people watching and quite the European feel, especially at lunch. The menu consists of small plates to share like charcuterie or cheese plates (sourced from C’est Cheese, our favorite cheese shop), fried asparagus or simply olives. You’ll also find open-faced sandwiches, or tartines, on the menu, including one with brie, apricot jam and chopped walnuts. Yum! The wine selection complements the food offerings and their farm-to-table cocktails won’t break the bank. How refreshing! Apéro Bar: Simple, fresh local fare that hits the spot. What more could you ask for?; 532 State Street; (805) 560-7333.



By Briana Westmacott ear Readers, we’re just going to come right out and say it: We love you! We really do. And since we love you so much, we are going to do you a favor. We are going to send you somewhere that’s sweet as honey. All in the name of love. Just a hop over the hill to the quaint town of Los Olivos, you will find a bright boutique bursting with inspiration. Honey Paper has stationary, cards, gift wrap, ribbons and much more that will most certainly inspire you to write, invite and entertain. If you are customizing any sort of invitation, Honey Paper can craft your vision. And with February right around the corner, a trip to their boutique will help you find the perfect love note for your Valentine.; 2933 Grand Avenue, Los Olivos; (805) 325-9320. With love always, SB Skinny


How You Arrive Matters...Call Pipeline Wine Tours, Enjoy complimentary cheese, crackers, chocolate & champagne on your way up to the Wine Country Special Events, LAX, & Courier Service

All Wrapped Up



sustainability in design as well as manufacturing. In fact, Be Green Packaging was the first company to achieve Cradle-to-Cradle certification, which identifies sustainable practices throughout the entire process, from product inception throughout its entire lifecycle. You may not think much about it, but when you buy something that you use once and throw away (like food trays, produce packaging, plates and more), the stuff you throw away can stick around in our environment for years and years and years. By weight, 50% of all packaging sales are for food, so how it’s wrapped matters. Be Green Packaging has worked since 2007 to create compostable, tree-free and GMO-free products working toward zero-waste packaging. While its headquarters are in Santa Barbara, its product impacts are planet-wide: Major brands like Whole Foods and Google feature this evolved packaging. Remember: What you buy matters, so put your money where your values are. (Note: Planning your next party? Check out Be Green’s online store for all sorts of products for homes, small businesses and restaurants. Be responsible. Be Green.) www.

GREEN SCENE By Courtney Dietz azors and to-go containers have more in common than you might think. Sounds surprising, sure, but take a look at the packaging of both products. That’s right, the packaging. Developed in Santa Barbara by Be Green Packaging, it reflects

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Santa Barbara Native,

James Ball/Owner

serving our community since 2007 Call or Book Online

805 895-8585

42 |

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ELEVATOR PITCH by Grant Lepper

Grant’s an entrepreneur, start-up strategist, digital marketing pro, sailor, hiker, cyclist, mentor and writer. With more than 20 years of creative marketing experience, Grant’s been on the founding team of four startups, run his own shop and delivered forward thinking digital marketing and creative solutions to emerging and established companies in technology, hospitality, education and active-lifestyle industries. Today he’s the Senior Partner of Digital Strategy at PULL Brand Innovation (

Digifit is the Digishi… Oh, Forget It


he ridiculously resilient ridge of high pressure that’s been stubbornly parked over the West Coast of North America is spectacular and terrifying at the same time: Terrifying in its lack of rainwater and snowpack; spectacular in the summer-like weather we’ve been experiencing during the middle of winter. There’s not much I can do about changing nature today (though I can cut back on water consumption and be conscious about the other choices I make), but I can do something with the spectacular weather – get out and exercise! Now that we’re a little over a month into the new year and many of us (including yours truly) made resolutions to get in shape again, I thought it would be interesting to focus on local entrepreneurs whose business models are about health, fitness and overall wellness, an industry that’s expected to top $1 trillion globally by 2017. As a digital marketing and brand strategist myself, I’m an advocate for measuring results. So, last summer, I decided I needed to keep a tally on my fitness efforts. A friend suggested I check out a mobile/web app called Digifit. So I did. And I’ve been using it nearly every day since, meticulously tracking my workouts and evaluating my progress.

Local Talent What I didn’t know when I downloaded Digifit is that it is a Santa Barbara-born and bred company. Who knew? It was founded right here in 2008 by self-described Apple gadget nut and finance whiz Michael Williams. Last week I reached out to Digifit and had the pleasure of connecting with CEO Dean Hovey to learn what this garageto-global venture was all about. Dean is the perfect executive to take Michael’s startup dream downfield. His career launched him into the stratosphere in the late 1970s when he founded a product design firm with fellow Stanford grad David Kelly. The firm is now known as IDEO. Working with tech visionary Steve Jobs, their team created the first Apple mouse, Apple III, Lisa and MacIntosh computers. Today, IDEO is a global powerhouse and was featured last year on CBS’s 60 Minutes with Charlie Rose, in an episode headlined How to Design Breakthrough Inventions. The program focused on their innovative approach to

Digifit founder Michael Williams looking rather (Digi)fit.

Moms In Motion. Making it happen. That’s Dean Hovey finishing a recent half-marathon. (What’s the heart rate in that one, Dean?)

experiences to tap into their motivations.” Okay, Dean, give me an example.

product design. Suffice it to say they’re a big deal. Digifit could be too. “Michael was convinced that pairing sensors to his iPhone would help him reach his own fitness goals,” Dean explained. “In that pursuit he designed and developed the world’s first mobile phone heart rate monitor.” That alone is pretty damn cool, but Digifit is more than a heart-rate monitor for your mobile device – much more. “It’s not about the sensor,” Dean continued, “it’s about the design experience of how the sensors provide data and insights to individuals so they can understand what’s going on and change their behaviors.” Heady stuff. “Our point is, how do we create timely experiences that take a person from where they’re at now to where they want to be?” No simple task, I imagined, as Dean dove in without hesitation. “It’s a systematic approach that engages people in the why and how, then allows them to track those things to see their progress and interact with their friends.” “In order to change, you’ve got to tap into your motivation,” he said, excited. “The motivation fuels the behavior activity and doing it enough times becomes habit. Everyone’s motivation is different: One person may be psyched about competitions, another something more philanthropic for the community. Somebody else may say they don’t care about competition, but love being part of a team.” Or even more motivating: You want to live a long and healthy life. (But that’s just me talking. And what the hell do I know?) So how does Digifit do all that? “It’s about creating new pathways,” Dean said, not slowing down. “By getting to know individuals quickly through their interactions on the phone, we tailor

Serendipitous Santa Barbara Synergy “Moms In Motion,” Dean declared. “One afternoon prior to joining Digifit, my wife and I were running along Cabrillo and encountered at West Beach a stampede of pink hibiscus tops heading our way.” By chance, he reached out to none other than Moms In Motion founder, Jamie Allison, as they passed to see what they were up to. Dean asked her point blank: “What is this thing going on?” Short on breath, Jamie explained, “It started as a triathlon team here in Santa Barbara in ’99 for moms to give support to one another. Knowing we’re at our best when taking care of ourselves first.” (Today, MIM has gone global with more than 10,000 members running strong. But that’s another story.) Fast-forward two years from the chance encounter, and founder Michael brings Jamie into Digifit’s downtown office to discuss how the two groups might work together with Dean. Serendipitous Santa Barbara synergy was in play with a timely outreach from an innovation officer from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services to Dean. They were looking to create a channel of communication from the American Academy of Pediatrics to women who have kids, from infants to five-year-olds, a demographic that Dean had experience with through yet another startup project. A master of product design and implementation, Dean quickly and opportunistically recognized that Digifit had the technology platform, Jamie had the demographic group (and was looking to grow) and the Academy had valuable content to share. The perfect trifecta. “By ‘white-labeling’ and customizing Digifit’s technology for a branded Moms In Motion platform and mobile app, we were able to deliver a real-world

application and are currently running trials around the U.S., sponsored by one of the largest consumer health companies around,” Dean proudly explained. “And it’s delivering great results! “The platform that we’ve created allows us to create all kinds of different experiential designs based upon physical exercise, nutrition, time, content and sensor tracking that comes at the right time in the market. Now, you have a better tool for getting your type-2 diabetes under control, recovering from a heart attack, improving fitness, preparing for a 5k, 10k or even a marathon. All this on the device that’s with you 24/7.” Told you Digifit could be a big thing. At the end of the day, I can only speak for myself. Digifit has helped me stay on track since I started using it, recording all kinds of great data such as my heart rate, speed, elevation gain, max heart rate and percentage and, most importantly, when I’ve worked out or when I’ve slacked. There’s also a tool for mapping, a compass and different screens relevant to the type of exercise I’m doing. It even has the ability to be shared easily.

Digifit Works, Outdoors or In… Before we finished up, I asked Dean what makes him happy. He answered with a chuckle, “Staying healthy myself. It’s amazing how much more energy you have when you take care of yourself.” He also told me it was about family and “nurturing and bringing his employees up to the next level,” which also brings him a lot of satisfaction. Now that Digifit has just completed a move into its new digs on East Carrillo, I’m betting there will be more than a few happy team members testing out products on their in-office spin bikes or taking a quick stroll up the block to work out at the nearby Spectrum Athletic Club. Good thing both are indoor-exercise experiences. It’s starting to rain as I write.  

learn more:

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The AlisAl rAnch It’s more than a home… it’s a lifestyle

Privacy Golf, Tennis & Spa Single-level Homes Large Lots with Huge Views Alisal Ranch is located in Solvang, approx. 35 minutes from Santa Barbara. Review the Alisal specific website for more information on the land lease: Home prices range from $299,000 to $1,565,000 Land leases range from $18,000 to $36,000 per year Contact me to receive more information and to schedule your personal tour of the 10 properties currently on the market.

SuSan Beckmann 805.245.8141 CalBRE#: 01185206

Sotheby’s International Realty and the Sotheby’s International Realty logo are registered (or unregistered) service marks used with permission. Operated by Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc.


ARCHITECTURE AS ART | WEB: 0113699 | $28,900,000 Suzanne Perkins 805.895.2138

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EQUESTRIAN COMPOUND | WEB: 0621544 | $5,999,995 Patty Murphy 805.680.8571

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SANTA BARBARA AREA BROKERAGES | | MONTECITO COAST VILLAGE ROAD | MONTECITO UPPER VILLAGE | SANTA BARBARA STATE STREET | SANTA YNEZ VALLEY Sotheby’s International Realty and the Sotheby’s International Realty logo are registered (or unregistered) service marks used with permission. Operated by Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc.

Come on in… the Water's Fine  
Come on in… the Water's Fine