PARTY MANNERS MATTER
Janeen Lewis
Tips for hosts and guests
When children use good manners, people want to be around them. Birthday parties (and other social engagements) are ideal opportunities to teach children party etiquette and graciousness that goes beyond rules. Whether your child is a host or guest, make teaching party etiquette fun. Stage a mock party so your family can role play, using these helpful hints. BE DISCREET Hosts If possible, consider inviting the entire team or class. If that won’t work, snail
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mail or email invitations and teach your kids not to talk about the party in front of children who aren’t invited. But be realistic — it’s hard for a preschooler or kindergartner not to talk about her party. If you start having discussions about being discreet when children are young, they will handle these situations appropriately as they get older. Guests It is disappointing when your child is not invited to a party, but disappointment provides an opportunity to coach kids through early let downs in life. Explain that she may be invited to the next party when someone else is not. If your child does receive an invitation, teach her to treat the matter with the same delicacy she did as the host. Tell her not to talk
about it in front of other kids since she doesn’t know who else is on the invitation list.
BE CLEAR WITH BOUNDARIES Hosts Be clear about party guidelines in the invitation, so people know what to expect. State the time, date and place, and let parents know if they can drop kids off or if they should stay. Let them know if adults are invited to eat, too. Add a note about whether or not siblings may attend. Be clear about when activities are happening, so the party progresses in an orderly manner. If gifts are opened at the party, put them away so kids aren’t tempted to play with gifts, which interrupts planned activities.