Jody Lee Cates
Finding Peace this Season The holiday season is upon us—that
exciting time of year when we celebrate family traditions, pass on treasured beliefs and create a bit of magic for children young and old. Making this time special for your family can be a source of great joy and satisfaction, but sometimes the sparkle dims as pressure builds to get everything done. When holiday to-do lists collide with already busy family schedules, we can find ourselves feeling more stressed than blessed. Before jumping into the frenzied days ahead, consider these ways to create more peace for your family this season.
Plan downtime. The words “holiday planning” compel many to pull out the calendar, wrestle days and times into submission, and work wonders by squeezing in every invitation and event. This year, create more peace by planning downtime around the activities your family can’t miss. “When I run myself or my kids ragged with all the activities each
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holiday brings, I wind up just wanting to get through it rather than truly experience it with my family,” says Audi Swift of Point Loma. “We like to pick a couple of traditions that mean the most to us, say no to the rest, and be present for the whole experience.” Happy childhood memories are made during focused time spent together, so guard your calendar. Discuss and choose non-negotiables—things that make the season unique for your family—then block out time for breathing room and spontaneity. “For years our Christmas was spent hustling the kids through the morning so we could make it on time to an extended family celebration in the afternoon,” says Sharon McDonnell of Rancho Peñasquitos. “A couple of years ago we switched things up, and now we spend Christmas Eve together with extended family and then enjoy a leisurely Christmas day with time to play in the park or go for a hike with our kids in the afternoon. It’s a new tradition that we all love.”
Team up before tackling the big day. Now is the time to talk to
family members about expectations. After discussing ways you’d like to celebrate, agree on things like budget, how to spend time off and how late to stay up the night before the big day, wrapping gifts and assembling toys. Understanding expectations helps avoid the overwhelming pressure to produce an idealized picture-perfect version of the day. Resist the temptation to compare with those who seem to have it all together and let go of the notion that you must do it all yourself. Shopping, baking, decorating, and other holiday activities are a lot more fun when shared. Work together to create an experience your whole family will enjoy. When you gather, give people jobs to do such as setting the table, prepping side dishes, and cleaning up. You’ll still be standing at the end of the day, and you’ll avoid the awkwardness of politely refusing guests wash the dishes while