SPORTS Rutgers desperately clings to wrestling victory as a source of relevancy like bouy in middle of churning ocean
TECHNOLOGY Apple buys your neighborhood, integrates your childhood home into the cloud
PUBLIC HEALTH Everyone has Meningitis B
WEATHER
Serving the Rutgers community since 1970. Independent as long as the Targum has
Swamp ass season is on its way!
RUTGERS UNIVERSITY—NEW BRUNSWICK
MONDAY, APRIL 1, 2019
ONLINE AT RUTGERSTHEMEDIUM.COM
Three Resident Assistants Implicated in Dorm Scandal ZOE SIFNAKIS AND JORDAN PLAUT SENIOR EDITORIAL STAFF
A shocking scandal that unfolded over spring break has implicated three resident assistants, who have been subsequently fired from their positions. The incident, according to an email sent by Executive Director of Residence Life Dan Morrison, involved the housing of New Brunswick residents in closed resident halls over break. The breach of student privacy came to light after several complaints were submitted to residence life on the morning of Monday, March 25th, regarding the state of on-campus housing. Three students in Campbell Hall on College Avenue reported small items missing from their dorm rooms, while two students on Cook campus, in Voorhees and Perry halls, lost a pair of sneakers and two Starbucks gift cards, respectively. “I checked everywhere and nothing SEE DORMS ON PAGE 4
else was missing, but it definitely looked like someone had gone through my stuff,” Marnie Joleff, SEBS ‘20, told The Medium. Ms. Joleff, who lost a Starbucks gift card, also reported finding a large pot of stew, apparently abandoned in a hurry, sitting on her floor’s common stove. With resident-led investigations going nowhere, university police officers called a press conference Friday to address student concerns. University police chief Kenneth B. Cop assured an agitated audience that there was not, in fact, a plague of petty theft running rampant through Rutgers, and that he could explain everything if they promised not to get mad. “As you all know, the university has been taking steps to better integrate itself into the surrounding New Brunswick community, and it would be insensitive and probably racist to tell me that that’s a bad idea, so don’t,” Cop began, sweatily. “We have resources here at Rutgers that we’d like to share with our lesser-educated neighbors,” he continued, profuse at this point. “To that end, we ran a doubleblind trial of a new housing experiment
Perry Hall, one of several dorms affected by a series of small robberies over spring break.
over break this semester.” Mr. Cop went on to explain that fifty homeless New Brunswickers had been bussed in to stay in dorm buildings while the students were locked out of their rooms for the week. When pressed, the chief admitted the security of student belongings during the trial had not been taken into account. Locals were invited in by the RA’s after the halls closed to students on Saturday, March 16th, and stayed throughout the week while students were away. The RA’s in question, who were reimbursed with RUexpress for their participation in the study, have asked to remain anonymous.
Many students that live in residence halls have voiced their anger towards these RA’s, calling the action a “misuse of power” and a “breach of student trust.” “How am I supposed to feel secure in my dorm when it could have been my RA letting strangers sleep in my bed?” said Julia Strong, a sophomore living in Tinsley Hall. “I have private things in my room! Very private! Things that if found would get me in a lot of trouble with powerful people! I need to make some calls.” “I’d like to stress the point that, although we did not obtain consent from students for their rooms to be used in the experiment, the tempo-
RU Dining Services Shares Details About New Outbreak at Brower MARISSA SCHWARTZ NEWS EDITOR
Since reports of Meningitis B were brought to students’ attention in February, University administrators have been on high alert, taking extra precautions to prevent the spread of contagious illnesses on campus. Student Health Services has been distributing information about vaccinations and other preventive measures throughout campus, both in classroom and public buildings and residence halls and it seems that these measures have been working to quell the transmission of Meningitis B. Unfortunately, as Meningitis diagnoses cease, a new culprit has sprung up on campus. The
manager of Brower Commons Ralph Calzoni, who has been at the University throughout 35 years of epidemics, says he’s never seen anything like this. “It’s dreadful” he said, “I thought this condition was eradicated years ago. I mean, in my time here I’ve seen whooping cough, chicken pox, and even rabies once, but never, never anything like this.” In an email to the University community, President Barchi highlighted the severity of the recent epidemic stating, “Students and staff should take extreme caution, especially when eating at dining halls, in order to avoid contracting this condition. Be sure to wash hands before eating and use serving tools and clean plates when getting food.”
Students are equally shocked about the new outbreak. Jordan Stanley, a second year biology student and frequenter of Brower said this, “You know, you never expect something like this to happen and then boom, you’re this close to being infected. It’s really a shame that parents are still exposing their kids to things
SEE OUTBREAK ON PAGE 4
Rutgers Researchers Have Officially Stopped Global Warming SCOTT HOBERMAN
FEATURES EDITOR Yes, it’s over. Feel free to use two straws We developed the process in a matter of in each drink, drive around just for fun, months and it’s fairly simple.” said PhD and throw those water bottles in the student Ronald McDonald. “We built a regular trash guilt-free. Rutgers scientists machine that can take carbon dioxide out have figured out the solution to global of the air and shove it up people’s asses. warming. “It actually wasn’t that difficult. All we need to do is mass produce these relatively inexpensive machines and get
SEE RESEARCHERS ON PAGE 4
VOLUME 51, ISSUE 9 • UNIVERSITY ... 3 • NATIONAL ... 6 • INSIDE BEET ... 7 • OPINIONS ... 8 • DIVERSIONS ... 10 • CLASSIFIEDS ... 12 • SPORTS ... BACK